IIT Madras April 2003 (Vol. 3 No. 2) * For Internal circulation *Not a priced magazine Editors Ajit Narayanan (Q) Quotable Quotes 351 Godavari Rahul Pratap M. (Kondaiah) 360 Godavari “Try saying that to Vipluv Aga (Satcho) your wife.” 161 Alakananda Acknowledgements -Dr Santhakumar, HoD (Aerospace) to a group of We would like to thank: students who, as an ID110 assignment, submitted an odometer that didn’t work when tested. Their excuse The Dean of Students, Prof. S.S. Gokhale for was: “couldn’t perform since it was the first time”. providing us with the substantial financial support required for this production. The Fourth Estate wants you to contribute The Institute Gymkhana for allowing us to use its facilities and for giving us access to back Send in articles, poems, short stories or any issues of older campus publications. piece of original writing to the editors. Amusing or informative forwards or even unforgettable quotes heard on campus, such as the one above, are equally welcome. April 2003 The Fourth Estate April 2003 IIT Madras From the Editors, If your first question on seeing this magazine is, “Why is it so late?”, we will take recourse to that old lawyers’ maxim and deny everything. We are not going to apologize. This magazine isn’t two months late – it was two months ‘in the making’ – a small but crucial difference, as you will see! In this issue, we have tried to explicitly concentrate on five different segments that are likely to interest you: a commentary on current affairs, a little bit of investigative journalism, some special features, lots of opinion, and the usual irreverent fun that has come to characterize our campus publications. Our editorial this time, in sync with many of the articles, is, for a change, a song of praise for IIT and IITians. It is high time, we thought, that we stopped making a scapegoat of the Dean, and concentrate on what is good and pleasant instead. As you read through several of our articles, you will see optimism and success everywhere, as opposed to gripe. We cover, most unforgivingly, the 38th Inter-IIT Sports Championship at IIT Delhi, where foul play and blatant favouritism took the Championship away from our boys. And we take a closer look at Saarang 2003, which most people believed we would summarise in a single word – Hi – but which we actually managed to flesh out quite a bit more. In an exclusive feature, for this issue, we got in touch with various recently-passed-out alumni who pursued different job options after graduation, and got them to share their experiences with us. A combination of 3 guest articles, and a commentary thereof, form one of our special features this time, concentrating on the oft-neglected Job Option. At around the same time as Saarang and Inter-IIT, alumni of the various IITs met in San Jose, California to sing, We are the world, We are the children, We are the ones to make a brighter day, So let’s start giving! This issue looks at IIT50, and Brand IIT, and a host of other issues that came to be discussed in a conversation with Dr. M.S. Ananth, Director, IIT Madras. This issue also reminisces about Almost Atlantis – The Mandakini Story. The previous issue of The Fourth Estate was in press at the time the incident occurred. Lest it seem dated now, the article only looks at it as a distant lurking memory. And there’s much more. We’ve tried hard to make this issue of The Fourth Estate readable and enjoyable, being, as it is, the last issue of the third successive term of The Fourth Estate. Finally, we want to dedicate this issue to former SAC Speaker, Lux, in whose tenure this magazine would have been released, had we not been a trifle late. But in the immortal words of Baba: “We may be late, but we are latest.” Read and enjoy. Ajit Narayanan Rahul Pratap M. Vipluv Aga 2 April 2003 The Fourth Estate Contents A Birds’-Eye View Almost Atlantis – The Mandakini Story 7 Anshumani Ruddra A small photo feature on the Mandakini incident that narrowly missed Anshumani Ruddra being our cover story last issue . Foul, Language and All That M. Shamanth and Nisheeth S 10 A report on IITM’s performance at Inter-IIT 2002 M. Shamanth and Nisheeth S. The Wimp Observes… Elections 2003 12 A close, irreverent look at the Student Elections this year The Wimp Those Four Days 32 A reflection upon Saarang 2003 Gautam Kumar Raja Opinion Student-Faculty Interaction – Who Needs It? Dr. R. Ravi 8 A member of the faculty comments on a topic close to his heart Dr. R. Ravi Somebody Stop Me Sandeep Bhadra 14 Critical comments about IIT’s democracy scene – and how to improve it Sandeep Bhadra Editorial: The Chosen 16 Why students of IIT Madras have just cause to blow their own trumpets The Fourth Estate Investigates Amrapali Cata Mega Mess or Giga Mess? 19 A less-than-flattering study on the Mega-Mess at Sarayu and Sharav Arjun N. Chennu Directorspeak 20 A talk with the Director, Prof Ananth, about Life, the Universe, Rahul Pratap M. and a lot of other things The Great B-Tech Wish List 24 An investigation into the proposed changes in curriculum AjitAmrapali Narayanan Cata The Job Option 25 A detailed investigation of what the recent Alumni feel about their jobs Ajit Narayanan Special Features Nostalgia Ajit Q. and Kaushik R. 15 Guess who! The Lonely Planet Guide to IIT Madras 35 The second article in the series explores the secrets of the Academic zone Ajit Q. and Kaushik R. Vipluv Aga The Fifth Column M. Shamanth 4 The Future Once Again… Half-yearly horoscope for the hostels VipluvAnonymous Aga A Fitting Tribute 22 …to a tradition that all of us love and adore so: Fitting! M. Shamanth Vikram and Vetaal in IITM 38 A story of lies, deceit, sex and politics (yeah right!) Anonymous 3 April 2003 The Fourth Estate The Future Once Again… Vipluv Aga' Once again as we gaze into our communicate the following equation to his FOK Ball, to see the future of the various friend on the other side of the room – hostels and the denizens, some wilting some β blooming, we prophesy strange and mystical ()∆ ij = 2 []2 + δ + ϕ E ∫∫∫ 2 xy (z sin )dxdydz events. The future is always what it seems, x= y=z tan x ij but again, the future isn’t what it used to be. Read on to find out the predictions for your “English for Communication” hostel. presentations by Sarasites, will be class acts in themselves, what with the Soc-Sec arranging for sets and props as well as Saraswathi costumes for his hostel mates. The formal creation of “Sarasites And All Literary A brilliant future is predicted for Enthusiasts” Club by their Lit-Sec will only Saraswathi. The enthusiasm for Lit-Cul see this fervour being spread to myriad events will shoot up to stellar levels. With places. harsh penance and perseverance the Sarasites will so muddle their lives with Literary skills, that they will be recognised a class apart even in their day-to-day lives. “Cheating during examinations, Due to all the JAM fervour ingrained in will be an art executed with them, Sarasites will take to banging their immaculate precision by Sarasites, desks and crying out, “Objection- ungrammatical” or “Objection-incoherent”, owing to their new found superiority in all their classes thereby earning the ire of in DumbC, and Tintoretto.” almost all their profs. As a consequence, the MSB, especially ED classes will see the procurement of fresh new benches, as most of the old ones will have been broken due to the vehement banging by Sarasites. Cheating during examinations, will Narmada be an art executed with immaculate precision by Sarasites, owing to their new As a windfall of having a huge found superiority in DumbC, and alumni base of some very rich pass-outs Tintoretto. Their classmates will be who yearn to give back something to their flabbergasted when they will see, one guy hostel, Narmad will see their coffers flush expressing “the gaussian pulse has a with so much money that they will have to singularity only at its minima” to his friend think of imaginative ways to utilize all of it exclusively using DumbC codes. Even the lest it be lost in that whirpool of profs will be stupefied when they realise that unaccountability that Hostel Secretaries by, a series of ‘yes’ and ‘no’s only, done by dread, known as “The Hostel a/c” from nodding or shaking their heads, one guy will ' Vipluv Aga, aka Satcho, is one of the editors of this magazine, and is a consultant Astrologer.He lives in Alakananda. 4 April 2003 The Fourth Estate which no funds may be drawn but only be promised, one of the Alsatians bit me and deposited into. my app is ruined, I heard you can’t get aid if you have been in jail for 1 year. I will try to After doing the obvious things, like get parole in 6 months…but then Visa and creation of a new mess with really good all….pack da..” cooks and different sections and cuisines, viz. tandoori, Tam-Brahm, Gult, and continental catering for every taste, hot Sarayu water and computers in every room with internet, a TV with cable per wing, For those who don’t know (and we astroturfing the hockey quadrangle and hope there aren’t too many of them) Sarayu central air-conditioning for the hot summer used to be a girls’ hostel but which now months, they will still be left over with hosts freshies only, kept in isolation from more.