ISSUE 5 - SUMMER 5768/2008 Presented to you by Sister To Sister 1 Home Run You swing the bat and shoot the ball at me once again. Dearest Sisters, Summer brings to mind an image of hilly fields of verdant grass, and joyous children running, arms out- You keep them coming. stretched, to catch the exhilaration floating in the breeze. To me, summer means visualizing Olympic-sized pools, with clear refreshing water, children in colorful Each time tubes holding onto the edge and splashing to make “Niagara Falls” or playing “Marco Polo.” I try to rest, I think summer, and I envision the beach, with frothy white waves lathering against the seashore, washing up even just for a bit, the elaborate sand castles that children spent hours creating. Summer implies ices of every different hue and flavor, chocolate ice cream sundaes, and two-colored slushes You aim with straws. Summer means fun, freedom, change, happiness, and release. another one Summer is the dream of every child, and that includes you and me. Grown-up children need summer fun my way. too. We need the lightness, the excitement, the happiness, and the throwing all worries to the wind. We can decide that our day will be fun, and so it will be. No need to deny that there are worries and problems, but for just one day we can choose to ignore all that. Today we’re having fun. You keep them coming. Today we’re laughing. When we laugh we produce endorphins that make our whole body feel good. When we laugh, our oxygen level in our brain rises. And, most of all, when we have a really good laugh for one Hard balls. hour, we burn 500 calories. (You see, even the adult in you will benefit!) There are fascinating museums, fun-filled parks, and spectacular hikes for you to enjoy. Or, try taking a Difficult ones. drive to Nowhere. Turn on your favorite music, roll up the windows of your car, and sing your heart out. Cry with the sad songs, and bounce with the lively ones. Let the stunning scenery soothe your insides. Take But the stronger the ball, in the incredible view of the blue mountains in the distance, contrasting the green trees closer up. Summer vacation is here — for everyone. The sun is shining, calling you to have fun. Leave the laundry, the longer I have to run. the dishes, and the worries. Lie in the grass, tan in the sun, grab your daughter’s hand — and just run. I run further and further. Don’t stay in your house, forget what’s within. Go out now — let your summer fun begin! Wishing you all the best — all the time!! I’m getting places, I’m not giving up. Sister to Sister 21 Shonny Court I catch each ball Lakewood, New Jersey 08701 You send my way. Email: [email protected] I’m working towards my Home run. 22 33 Butterfly Magazine Interviews I Resign Yehudit Kotler, I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult. I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an Laughter eight-year-old again. I want to go to a pizza shop and think that it’s a four-star restaurant. Leader I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make ripples with rocks. I want to think M&Ms are better than money because you Hello, Yehudit. Can you tell Butterfly readers about can eat them. yourself and what you do? I want to lie under a big oak tree and run a lemonade stand I am a laughter leader and I lead laughter sessions in all sorts of with my friends on a hot summer day. situations. I work with cancer patients, terror victims, in an old I want to return to a time when life was simple. age home, at bas mitzvah parties, and with regular mommies. I also lead a laughter session every month, lichvod Rosh Chodesh, When all you knew were colors, multiplication tables, and and in honor of women, in my home in Ramot, Yerushalayim, nursery rhymes, but that didn’t bother you, because you free of charge. didn’t know what you didn’t know and you didn’t care. All you knew was to be happy because you were blissfully un- What happens at a laughter session? Seven days without laughter I begin by explaining the value of laughter and why it’s important aware of all the things that should make you worried or upset. to laugh in our stress-filled life. I connect the benefits of laughter makes one weak. —Mort Walker to the theme of the yom tov or chodesh which we are beginning. I want to think the world is fair. We then warm up with some breathing and stretching. And then How do you bring this into your life? That everyone is honest and good. we proceed to laugh. We just start laughing and laughing, using Once, I was about to leave to a laughter session and opened the laughter exercises. Some are related to the yom tov coming up, fridge to take something to eat. In the fridge was a container with I want to believe that anything is possible. the season, the theme of the party, and some just for fun. We tomato paste, and I accidentally knocked it over and it spilled all I want to be oblivious to the complexities of life and be overly invite our inner child to join, giving it permission to enjoy, let go, over me. I was now a tomato-covered laughter leader, including excited about the little things again. and participate in the group activity. the special T-shirt that I wear when I lead a group. I couldn’t believe it! I was supposed to have been out of the house already, I want to live simple again. One particular exercise is done with something that is familiar and here I was, covered with tomato paste. Just then — as I was I don’t want my day to consist of computer crashes, moun- to us all. We begin by inhaling, and then exhaling a big Jewish about to get upset — I caught myself. “Oh, this is the Laugh of “krechtz” (oy). We inhale again, and then let it out as a graduated tains of paperwork, depressing news, the Tomato Paste. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!” “krechtz” (oy, oy, yoy…) . By the third time, you can turn the how to survive more days in the month than there is money in “krechtz” into laughter. It can be forced, but do it. Soon it will From upstairs, my daughter called out, “Oh, no, what happened the bank, doctor’s bills, gossip, illness, and loss of loved ones. be for real. It is amazing how simple a troubled krechtz can be now?” turned into a joyous laugh. I want to believe in the power of smiles, hugs, a kind word, “It’s the Laugh of the Tomato Paste! There’s tomato paste truth, justice, peace, dreams, the imagination, How do you get ladies to just start laughing? everywhere!” mankind, and making angels in the snow. By doing exercises that induce laughter. Laughter is contagious. We make eye contact and connect with the other women. We “That doesn’t sound so funny.” But soon enough, she was So...here’s my checkbook and my car keys, my credit cards all fake the laughter at first, but very quickly, we find ourselves laughing, too. And together, amidst the laughter, the kitchen and all my responsibility. laughing for real. As Chazal teach us, “A person becomes what was cleaned. I am officially resigning from adulthood. is actions are.” And if you want to discuss this further, you’ll have to catch My reward followed. Several months later, my daughters were Our goal is to find a pure simchah, and we can use laughter me first, in the kitchen, cooking for Shabbos, and someone splashed as a tool to get there. We begin by simulating laughter. Then tomato paste all over herself and the kitchen. Hearing peals of ’cause, “Tag! You’re it.” we learn to laugh just for fun. And eventually, when something laughter from my kitchen, I went to check what was going on, B doesn’t go as planed, we will find ourselves laughing. As I am and was greeted with the Laugh of the Tomato Paste: ha, ha, fond of saying, “Kol mah de’avid rachmana, litzchok avid.” ha! I proudly joined their laughter. 4 5 Laughter is the shortest Laughter gives us distance. It Laughter and tears are both respons- distance between two people. allows us to step back from an es to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is -Victor Borge event, deal with it and then less cleaning up to do afterward. In Shamayim they react, “You think this is not good, We’ll move on. —Bob Newhart —Kurt Vonnegut show you what’s not good.” And he receives an even harder challenges. When children see that our reaction to a situation is with laughter, they take the cue and they will learn to do it to. Soon you’ll be He could have been asked the same question, and answered, having a happy, laughing family. The Physical Benefits of Laughter “Baruch Hashem, very good.” Research has shown that laughter has both preventive and therapeutic OK, Yehudit. You got us. Now we are ready to all start values. From Shamayim they’d reply, “You say this is good, we’ll show laughing.