Basic Negotiations ❖ Circle or highlight things that you both want. https://www.dragonstailalc.com ❖ Cross out the things that are not to be done in this scene. ❖ SAFE WORDS: Red=Stop, Yellow=Slowdown/Check-in, Green=Keep going, (Talk about non-verbal options in case someone finds themselves unable to talk for any reason.) Top Bottom Switch For this Scene, is a…. Serious Playful Sexy Dominant Submissive Masochistic Sadistic And I want to feel... Energetic Cathartic Overwhelmed Beautiful Degraded Peaceful For this Scene, is a…. Top Bottom Switch Serious Playful Sexy Dominant Submissive Masochistic Sadistic And I want to feel... Energetic Cathartic Overwhelmed Beautiful Degraded Peaceful Stingy Whips Spanking Canes Pummeling (Punching) Impact Play Heavy Paddles Flogging Thuddy Light Rope Leather/Cuffs Mental Restrictive Decorative Cages Bondage Suspension Collar/Lead Gags Floor Work/Bondage Playing with Hair Pressure Points Biting Licking Tickling Sensation Play Hair Pulling Human Furniture Scratching Electricity Kissing Sensory Deprivation Blindfolds Hoods Earplugs Mind Games Mind Fucks Exhibitionism Fear Play Cuddles Talking/Socialize Food Water Coffee Hot Chocolate Aftercare Blankets None needed Check in Tomorrow ❖ What are things you would like to be called? ❖ What are things you are not to be called? ❖ Any Medical Conditions? ❖ Are you into humiliation? Explain what kind/what you like. ❖ Feel free to talk about things not covered on this sheet. ❖ If at an event, talk to the DM’s if your planning a non-con scene ❖ Not everything is listed- feel free to use your imagination. Everyone holds the right to say no to anything. Mark no touch area on figures above Tampa Bay Phoenix Club Tips on Negotiating a Scene ❖ Negotiating a scene is different than negotiating a relationship. ❖ Negotiating play is vital for new players or for those who have never played together. o Once you get to know someone you can forego some negotiation for spontaneity. ❖ Ready to negotiate? Have in mind what you would like to experience. o Be as specific as you'd like. o Express what turns you on. o Things you have tried in the past that really did it for you. ❖ Tell them your limits-Refer to the checklist on other side ❖ Pre-Scene negotiating includes but not limited to o Who is the top/bottom-any observers-types of address (Sir, Ma’am, Master etc.) o Needs and/or expectations, likes/dislikes, and ability- Both top & bottom. o Boundaries/Limits ▪ Physical-marks, pain, etc ▪ Psychological-obedience or humiliation o Types of play-impact, sensory, electrical, etc o Gear or attire-clothing, toys, o Duration- How long o Health conditions/concerns-Don’t be shy. Heart, allergies, meds, STD’s o Safety- discuss and address concerns o Sex- Yes or No. Touching body parts. o Safewords!!!!! Stoplight system is good Red, Yellow, Green. Red Stop Now! Yellow-Slow down and discuss. Green-Ok good to go. Of come up with your own. Non-verbal cues. Raising hand, dropping ball, etc. https://submissiveguide.com/communication/articles/basics-negotiating-scene Books we recommend ❖ SM 101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman ❖ Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism by Philip Miller ❖ Loving Dominant by John Warren ❖ The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy ❖ The New Bottoming Book by Janet W. Hardy and Dossie Easton ❖ Jay Wiseman's Erotic Bondage Handbook Websites for Research https://www.dragonstailalc.com http://www.frugaldomme.com/home.htm https://www.albanypowerexchange.org/articles/ https://www.submissiveguide.com/ https://www.xeromag.com/fvbdsm.html http://www.asubmissivesjourney.com/first_meeting.html http://bdsmwiki.info/BDSM_101 http://www.bdsmcircle.net/dslifestyle/checklist.htm http://www.drkdesyre.com/info/safety.html http://www.leathernroses.com/lnrhome.htm https://www.submissiveguide.com/communication/articles/initiatin g-a-discussion-about-bdsm-interest-with-a-vanilla-partner .