<p>C C N W E E K L Y S O L U T I O N S S E R I E S T H E W E E K O F M A Y 5 , 2 0 0 8</p><p>Good Connections, 1: Only the Lonely </p><p>Featuring Dr. John Townsend Psychologist Best-selling co-author of Boundaries series, author of How People Grow</p><p>Visit CCN on the web at www.ccn.tv CCN Solutions: Good Connections, 1—Only the Lonely Page 2</p><p>Think about the last time you felt disconnected from someone important to you How did that affect the other aspects of your life? </p><p>I. Loneliness </p><p>You can’t overestimate the importance of good connections</p><p>Loneliness is a sign of life God sets the lonely in families. —Psalm 68:6 Loneliness: An unsatisfied desire for connection </p><p>Loneliness is a signal: “Get connected”</p><p>Emotional object constancy</p><p>The love taken in from others sustains me in times of being alone …being rooted and established in love… —Ephesians 6:17, 18 State of loneliness vs. trait of loneliness </p><p>II. Aspects of loneliness </p><p>Lonely people are not necessarily alone people </p><p>“Pocket loneliness”</p><p>The source of loneliness is relationships</p><p>- Abandonment </p><p>- Pocket loneliness </p><p>Sometimes the loneliest people don’t feel the loneliness </p><p>It’s messier in life to feel lonely, but that’s how God designed life</p><p>Visit CCN on the web at www.ccn.tv CCN Solutions: Good Connections, 1—Only the Lonely Page 3</p><p>- Dependency</p><p>- Active dependency </p><p>- Passive dependency</p><p>“If I have to ask, it doesn’t count” </p><p>- Loneliness recreates itself </p><p>- The help-rejecting complainer</p><p>- We tend to pick the people who help us be lonely</p><p>Think: “How would I feel around me?” </p><p>III. Solutions </p><p>- Own the condition </p><p>Loneliness is not cured by marriage </p><p>- Get connected </p><p>You need people in your life who are there to help you connect </p><p>- Take a risk of becoming vulnerable </p><p>Whatever is brought into relationship gets better </p><p>- Pay attention to devaluation </p><p>Begin to say “Thank you”—and mean it </p><p>- Burn it</p><p>Visit CCN on the web at www.ccn.tv CCN Solutions: Good Connections, 1—Only the Lonely Page 4</p><p>Next week on Solutions: “Tear Down the Walls”</p><p>Resources </p><p>How People Grow: What the Bible Reveals about Personal Growth by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend www.cloudtownsend.com Loving People by Dr. John Townsend www.cloudtownsend.com</p><p>Solutions Leaders www.cloudtownsend.com</p><p>Ultimate Leadership workshops www.cloudtownsend.com</p><p>Sponsored In Part By:</p><p>New Life Ministries is a fully-equipped resource for the treatment of mental and spiritual health issues. www.newlife.com</p><p>Contact Information</p><p>Dr. John Townsend Church Communication Network Cloud-Townsend Resources PO Box 1718 3176 Pullman Street, Suite 105 Mountain View, CA 94042 Costa Mesa, California 92626 Phone: 800-321-6781 Phone: 800-676-4673 Fax: 650-745-0660 Web: www.cloudtownsend.com Email: [email protected] Web: www.ccn.tv</p><p>Visit CCN on the web at www.ccn.tv</p>