60 NOT OUT THE SUFFOLK SCRIBBLER ACES CONTENTS Volume 7, Issue 1, Spring 2002 4 Volume 14, Issue 3, Autumn 2009 67 Volume 7, Issue 2, Summer 2002 5 Volume 14, Issue 4, Winter 2009/10 69 Volume 7, Issue 3, Autumn 2002 6 Volume 15, Issue 1, Spring 2010 72 Volume 7, Issue 4, Winter 2002/03 8 Volume 15, Issue 2, Summer 2010 73 Volume 8, Issue 1, Spring 2003 10 Volume 15, Issue 3, Autumn 2010 75 Volume 8, Issue 2, Summer 2003 11 Volume 15, Issue 4, Winter 2010/11 77 Volume 8, Issue 3, Autumn 2003 13 Volume 16, Issue 1, Spring 2011 79 Volume 8, Issue 4, Winter 2003/04 16 Volume 16, Issue 2, Summer 2011 81 Volume 9, Issue 1, Spring 2004 18 Volume 16, Issue 3, Autumn 2011 82 Volume 9, Issue 2, Summer 2004 20 Volume 16, Issue 4, Winter 2011/12 84 Volume 9, Issue 3, Autumn 2004 23 Volume 17, Issue 1, Spring 2012 85 Volume 9, Issue 4, Winter 2004/05 26 Volume 17, Issue 2, Summer 2012 87 Volume 10, Issue 1, Spring 2005 27 Volume 17, Issue 3, Autumn 2012 89 Volume 10, Issue 2, Summer 2005 29 Volume 17, Issue 4, Winter 2012/13 91 Volume 10, Issue 3, Autumn 2005 32 Volume 18, Issue 1, Spring 2013 92 Volume 10, Issue 4, Winter 2005/06 34 Volume 18, Issue 2, Summer 2013 95 Volume 11, Issue 1, Spring 2006 36 Volume 18, Issue 3, Autumn 2013 96 Volume 11, Issue 2, Summer 2006 38 Volume 18, Issue 4, Winter 20013/14 97 Volume 11, Issue 3, Autumn 2006 41 Volume 19, Issue 1, Spring 2014 98 Volume 11, Issue 4, Winter 2006/07 43 Volume 19, Issue 2, Summer 2014 100 Volume 12, Issue 1, Spring 2007 46 Volume 19, Issue 3, Autumn 2014 102 Volume 12, Issue 2, Summer 2007 48 Volume 19, Issue 4, Winter 20 105 Volume 12, Issue 3, Autumn 2007 50 Volume 20, Issue 1, Spring 2015 106 Volume 12, Issue 4, Winter 2007/08 51 Volume 20, Issue 2, Summer 2015 108 Volume 13, Issue 1, Spring 2008 53 Volume 20, Issue 3, Autumn 2015 109 Volume 13, Issue 2, Summer 2008 56 Volume 20, Issue 4, Winter 20015/16 110 Volume 13, Issue 3, Autumn 2008 58 Volume 21, Issue 1, Spring 2016 111 Volume 13, Issue 4, Winter 2008/09 61 Volume 21, Issue 2, Summer 2016 112 Volume 14, Issue 1, Spring 2009 63 Volume 21, Issue 3, Autumn 2016 113 Volume 14, Issue 2, Summer 2009 65 Volume 21, Issue 4, Winter 2016/17 114 2 THE SCRIBBLER THE SUFFOLK SCRIBBLER INTRODUCTION My first Suffolk Scribbler piece was published in the Spring 2002 edition of The Terrier; nearly 15 years ago. Actually, had it been left to me, it would have been my first Almost Yesterday’s Man piece but, as luck would have it, wiser counsels prevailed. The wisest of the lot was Colin Bradford, then Editor of The Terrier, who was insistent that I should write under the name of the Suffolk Scribbler and who wrote the following introduction to my inaugural piece: The Editor is delighted to be able to introduce to Terrier readers a humble, yet outstandingly adequate, successor to our much loved erstwhile columnist, Yesterday’s Man. This is the first of what we hope will be a popular and long-running column by the Suffolk Scribbler. New readers will need to know that “Yesterday’s Man” was in fact Richard Miller, formerly the Norfolk County Estates supremo. In 2002 he had decided to give up writing his column “after 35 years of hard work.” Colin’s introduction was quite far-sighted in predicting a “long-running column” as we are already at 15years and still counting. And I think we can already begin to make some judgements about popularity. In contrast to Yesterday’s Man, where according to the YM writer not a single member of ACES ever mentioned Suffolk Scribblers in a commemorative the column to him so he was never really booklet was proposed jointly by William sure that anyone actually read it. Every Marshall, a humble nobody from Suffolk, time I go to a national conference or and the current Editor of The Terrier, similar function someone will take the Betty Albon. ACES Eastern Branch has opportunity to seek me out and then tell provided generous funding to help pay for me that they always check out the back a professionally produced PDF document pages of The Terrier first. with the intention of then forwarding a copy of this to every member. And it was this point that first gave birth to the concept of publishing all the Suffolk I did hear it said that when it was known Scribbler pieces under one cover. With that I was going to write a regular, the true enthusiast taking an early look at somewhat light-hearted column, some the whole column it could be argued that ACES members laughed. Well, they’re not individual items within the piece could, laughing now! potentially, be overlooked. Consequently, after the publication of 60 pieces, totalling over 105,000 words, the project to combine all published 3 THE SCRIBBLER THE SUFFOLK SCRIBBLER VOLUME 7, ISSUE 1, SPRING 2002 The Editor [Colin Bradford] is delighted So where is this column going? I’ve no press. That anyone finds it remarkable to be able to introduce to Terrier idea. I’ll give it a go and see what happens. that politicians might, on occasion, tell readers a humble, yet outstandingly less than the whole truth, is beyond me. adequate, successor to our much-loved A more important question is “Where Or that civil servants might do likewise. erstwhile columnist, Yesterday’s Man. is ACES going?” I sometimes wonder And to get excited about the fact that This is the first of what we hope will be if a RICS (of which more later) type spin doctors lie seems surely to miss the a popular and long-running column by makeover is needed. ACES expertise point. One of the suggested remedies to the Suffolk Scribbler. and influence centres on the provision prevent all this is to make aspirant spin of estates services in local government. doctors take, and presumably pass, the I thought the auditions queue for Peters and Waterman were The civil service exams before being able to Yesterday’s Man (YM) would have gone Management Gurus of the 80s. One take up employment. In this way only right round the block but no, just a guest of their principles was “Stick to the the right people would be let in ie no column from Malcolm (MacAskill), with a knitting”. So why does ACES want to riff-raff. Like the titled senior mandarin nice picture to cut out and frame. Mine extend membership to groups of people who announced, with great erudition has pride of place on the mantelpiece. It who DON’T provide estates services and sangfroid, when events took a turn keeps the kids away from the fire. in local government while insisting, for the worse – Canute-like, that those who DO provide The last issue was full of references to estates services to local government, “We’re all f*****. I’m f*****. You’re f*****. Cardiff and, by coincidence, I was there but are NOT directly employed by local The whole department’s f*****. It’s been only the week before the AGM with that government, are excluded. Seems the biggest cock-up ever and we’re all Diamond Fenland Geezer, the real YM. perverse to me. completely f*****.” Really? It was the occasion of the last STEPS Seminar of all time and County Hall Cardiff ACES Council in January now ran Ps - Is there anyone there? was the last stop on YM’s Farewell Tour. through the now traditional “I hate the Although his Betty ‘n Bert Roadshow went RICS” exchange of anecdotes. I am sure The only complaint I ever heard YM like clockwork at Cambridge and Walsall, they are all true. And the most damming make about ACES was that throughout it nearly fell at the last hurdle. Adrian criticism of all is surely the failure to all the 35 years of writing his column he (James) was introducing Betty’s pre-lunch reply to members’ correspondence. was never sure that anyone actually read spot while I was doing a last minute sound Could I offer two comments? As it. So feel free to comment via the Editor check on the laptop. As Adrian got to “and someone now outside local government “if you feel the urge.” I promise not to here she is…” we both looked up and she I know that the RICS is not the use the standard response to letters of had disappeared! Someone muttered, only organisation to demonstrate complaint allegedly used by some MPs “Bl**dy hell, she’s b****red off”, but all was institutional failure to answer letters. ie “Dear Sir, Today I received an abusive well. She was actually scrabbling round And secondly it seems pointless to letter from some crackpot who signed on the floor recovering the contents of an repeatedly share these thoughts your name. I thought you ought to know up-turned briefcase. So Cardiff was saved between ourselves meeting after about it as you may wish to take action and did not miss out on its share of GN11 meeting. Let’s do something. Anything to stop it.” Update, the Valuation of Social Housing, would be better than nothing.