LMU/LLS Theses and Dissertations Fall October 2013 Tie-Dyed Realities in a Monochromatic World: Deconstructing the Effects of Racial Microaggressions on Black-White Multiracial University Students Claire Anne Touchstone Loyola Marymount University, [email protected] Follow this and additional works at: https://digitalcommons.lmu.edu/etd Part of the Higher Education Commons, and the Race, Ethnicity and Post-Colonial Studies Commons Recommended Citation Touchstone, Claire Anne, "Tie-Dyed Realities in a Monochromatic World: Deconstructing the Effects of Racial Microaggressions on Black-White Multiracial University Students" (2013). LMU/LLS Theses and Dissertations. 211. https://digitalcommons.lmu.edu/etd/211 This Dissertation is brought to you for free and open access by Digital Commons @ Loyola Marymount University and Loyola Law School. 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LOYOLA MARYMOUNT UNIVERSITY Tie-Dyed Realities in a Monochromatic World: Deconstructing the Effects of Racial Microaggressions on Black-White Multiracial University Students by Claire Anne Touchstone A dissertation presented to the Faculty of the School of Education, Loyola Marymount University, in partial satisfaction of the requirements for the degree Doctor of Education 2013 Tie-Dyed Realities in a Monochromatic World: Deconstructing the Effects of Racial Microaggressions on Black-White Multiracial University Students Copyright © 2013 by Claire Anne Touchstone Loyola Marymount University School of Education Los Angeles, CA 90045 This dissertation written by Claire Anne Touchstone, under the direction of the Dissertation Committee, is approved and accepted by all committee members, in partial fulfillment of requirements for the degree of Doctor of Education. ____________________________________ Date Dissertation Committee ____________________________________ Kerry Ann Rockquemore, Ph.D. Committee Member ____________________________________ Ana Serrano, Ph.D., Committee Member ii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS This dissertation would not have been possible without the love, support, and guidance from a number of individuals: First and foremost, I acknowledge God, who has given me the desire, wisdom, love, and willingness to attempt this endeavor. I pray that Your will has been done through this work. I also acknowledge my Mum and Dad, for providing what seemed like an endless supply of time, energy, love, faith, and money. I am especially grateful to Dr. Magaly Lavadenz as the chairperson of my committee. Your patience, guidance, and positivity truly have inspired me, and I thank you for challenging me to pursue even higher goals. Thank you very much also to the members of my dissertation committee – Dr. Ana Serrano, Dr. Yvette Lapayese, and Dr. Kerry Ann Rockquemore – for the support, enthusiasm, and encouragement that you gave to me during this academic journey. To all of my uncles, aunts, and cousins, and particularly to my Aunt Luna Taplac, who always believed in me. I would also like to especially thank to my sisters, Stephanie Bender and Tricia Johnson, for always being there with a listening ear, and often sending little surprise treats to encourage me along the way. To my family members who have passed on but will never be forgotten - Grandpa and Grandma Mosley, Grandma Jeri, Aunt Anne, Aunt Juanita, Uncle Ward, and Aunt Nettie. Your lives and your legacies have inspired my desire to do this work, and I thank you tremendously for your examples of grace and dignity. I would like to acknowledge my dearest friends – David Pelayo, Karen Johnson, Nancy Nagashima, Suzanne Nichols, Kimberly Mills, Claudia Luna, Pamela Frieden, Peggy Cullinane, and Michele Manzella – for keeping me sane in the midst of dissertation stress and for providing heartfelt laughs or shoulders to cry on. I dearly value your friendships because you were there whenever I needed you, with kind words, patient hearts, shopping sprees, tea parties, and comfort food! To Dr. Laurie Walters, my dear friend and “dissertation sponsor” – I especially thank you for helping me to stay on track (and to help me get back on track at times). You are a tremendous example of academic excellence, and I deeply respect your friendship. I am forever indebted to the faculty and staff in the School of Education at Loyola Marymount University. I owe a special thank you to Dr. Patrick Lynch for his invaluable expertise in helping me with the editing of this dissertation. I also would like to thank Dr. David Scozzaro iii for your gentle guidance. And this endeavor would not have been completed if not for the organizational assistance of Ms. Deanna Pittman. Thank you. To my doctoral program Cohort 5 colleagues – thank you for the academic bonds and personal friendships that we shared. Good luck with the many amazing things I know you each will do. To my “dissertation kitties,” Wilson and Squeaky, who were my companions through my panic attacks, gray hairs, crying jags, and middle-of-the-night-floor pacings. Thank you for kitty kisses, furry hugs, and constant companionship. I would especially like to acknowledge the beautiful souls who inspired me… the participants of this research. Thank you for sharing your stories with me. It is my hope that your voices will be heard, loud and proud. I am grateful to have finally met “my people.” “My People” by Langston Hughes The night is beautiful, So the faces of my people. The stars are beautiful, So the eyes of my people. Beautiful, also, is the sun. Beautiful, also, are the souls of my people. “The Beauty of Gray” by Live This is not a black and white world To be alive I say that the colours must swirl And I believe That maybe today We will all get to appreciate The Beauty of Gray iv I’m like in a gray area and although that sounds negative, I appreciate that in my life… There’s different parts about me that I appreciate from either side, to where both my black side and my white side, they’ve combined and made me somebody who I appreciate being. – Amber Being multiracial is not easy, as you can see, but being able to embrace both cultures and still become a part of both ethnic backgrounds is the true beauty of it. – Ana There’s a oneness between being Black and being White, and that oneness is represented within myself. – Elyse And so, it just seems to me that it’s like a lesson in school or in society that needs to be retaught and starting at an early age, like, getting kids that are from different backgrounds together and working together. – John Because one thing I think is really… odd is, like, since you are Black, you must have all the answers to the Black universe. And then you somehow also have to answer for every crazy Black fool that runs around. – Luigi But when it comes to other people, they’re making me choose one, and so I’m at ease with who I am and being a mixed person… it’s just hard when it comes to explaining it to other people. – Peach I’ve liked (being multiracial) because when I go some places I feel different. – Pip I feel like I’ve lived in the gray area, and I feel like that’s the way most of the universe really is. Very few things are actually black and white. So I feel like I’ve lived in the gray area and I’ve acknowledged it and embraced it, and that’s given me a certain perspective and outlook towards the rest of the world, and I think I like being able to share that perspective with the rest of the world. – Sonic You are innately who you are based on your experiences and your choices and your environment essentially, and not because of your skin color, so that’s what I would say. I would say it’s a balance, absolutely, of self-identity. – Sonya v I think also these experiences, just overall they’ve kind of pointed out that my being a multiracial person is kind of a unique situation… and so it just puts emphasis on the fact that even though I don’t really worry about race and it’s never been a huge topic in my family, that race is an ever- present issue. And it’s always going to affect the way people are thinking and judging other people. – Toad The best thing I like (about being multiracial) is that I feel like I’m a little bit more open to other people. – Yoshi vi DEDICATION To Mum and Dad… Thank you for supporting me in ways beyond my belief. This academic journey is one that – in what feels like another lifetime ago – seemed impossible and non-existent for me. I am grateful that you both always knew that I could do this work… and more. Thank you for listening to me through all of my numerous and persistent discussions about this project – for you never showed boredom or frustration, and always cared for the passion I have for my multiracial experience. Lastly, thank you for loving each other so honestly and completely; for loving me so selflessly; and for teaching me to trust in God. It is your faith in the Lord that has been the greatest gift you have ever given to me. I love you both very much. I dedicate this dissertation to you. “God of our weary years God of our silent tears Thou who has brought us thus far on the way Thou who hast by thy might, led us into the light Keep us forever in the path, we pray. “Lest our feet stray from the places Our God where we met Thee Lest our hearts drunk with the wine of the world We forget Thee “Shadowed beneath Thy hand May we forever stand True to our God True to our native land.” – James Weldon Johnson, “Lift Every Voice and Sing” To my Wilson… My special feline companion, who left this life on March 7, 2012, to begin his spiritual journey.