“Everyone is blessed with a set of talents. Only some people realise the full potential of those talents. Marc did. His story is one where adversity spurred him on to reach his personal best and achieve more than most people could dream of. If you have any interest in reaching your personal best, this book is a must read. Thanks Marc for the inspiration and guidance.” Jeremy Dale, EMEA Regional Vice President of Retail Sales and Marketing, Entertainment and Devices, Microsoft “Marc is one of the most inspirational speakers I have ever heard and his story is one of great courage, determination and compassion.” Baroness Sue Campbell CBE, Chair of UK Sport and Youth Sport Trust “He can swim and he can write. Not many people can say that.” Daley Thompson CBE, Double Olympic Champion “Marc is a master story teller and the stories he tells have powerful parallels to the work place.” Jon Emms, Pfizer European Specialty Care B.U., Marketing Head “Marc is an inspirational, insightful and highly amusing speaker who ably draws out valuable life and business lessons from his personal story in a thought provoking, challenging manner. I can safely say that everyone who heard Marc’s story left the session moved, inspired and motivated to work that little bit harder. To connect with people is a difficult skill, but to connect, move and emotionally involve is beyond that, and Marc is one of those rare speakers capable of this.” Chris Daniels, Head of London 2012 Activation, Wholesale Division, Lloyds TSB “An astonishing blending of tactics and ethics, of quietly inspirational exhortation without heavy salesmanship. What the reader comes to realise is that Marc achieved his golds (and goals) entirely through self-motivated hard work. His focus and goal-setting can be envied, but they are also learnable and can be emulated.” Professor David Mayer “Marc Woods’ personal story of achievement in the face of adversity is hugely inspiring. His great skill lies in communicating the lessons he has learnt in a way that entertains but also challenges.” Simon Featherstone CMG, British High Commissioner to Malaysia “Marc is one of those rare people who has the gift of inspiring people of all ages. His visit to Malaysia was invaluable. He motivated ministry officials, journalists and school kids to reflect on what really matters in life and encouraged them to achieve their goals to the best of their ability.” Mandy Johnson, Director of British Council Malaysia “Initially we invited Marc to speak at our conference as a one-off. We asked him to bring to life the challenges and rewards of being a Paralympian for our colleagues as part of Sainsbury’s sponsorship of the games. His inspirational and engaging session was one of the highlights of the day and his impact so far reaching that we have been working with Marc since then. We have created our own Sainsbury’s version of this book because it applies to all of us, individually and as a business as we all try to win our game of inches.” Justin King, Chief Executive, J Sainsbury Plc “Marc Woods is a great sportsman with a compelling story to tell. You will be moved and motivated by this book, in which you will find courage, determination, inspiration and equality – the core values of the – admirably exemplified by his extraordinary life and journey. And if you get the chance to hear him speak – don’t miss it!” Nick Fuller, Head of Education, The London Organising Committee of the Olympic Games and Paralympic Games Ltd “Marc Woods has been the inspiration behind many of my team’s successes over the last 5 years. Both his personal presentations and his outstanding book “Personal Best” have shown my team not only what can be achieved, but more importantly how personal and business success comes from within.” Chris Brindley, National Sales Director, British Gas, Winner of Sales Leader of the Year and Britain’s Best Boss. “Marc is a truly inspirational speaker. I personally was humbled as I listened to Marc’s experiences and was elated by his triumphs. It was a delight to listen to Marc and a pleasure to share some time with him. Marc is a truly wonderful person who has overcome huge set back but retains an inspirational view of the world. Our Award ceremony was enriched by Marc’s motivational speech.” Carolyn Nixon, Head of Communication and Engagement, UK Power Networks

“Marc is an example of how an individual overcomes real adversity to become an elite athlete. His authentic story shows how determination, challenge and a constant desire to improve makes dreams come true.” Steve Cooper, Managing Director, Barclays, Business and Personal Banking Solutions PERSONAL BEST For my Mum and brother who are always there for me, for Petra and Evie who make home the place I yearn for, and for Dad who continues to inspire us all. Personal Best

How to achieve your full potential

Marc Woods This edition first published 2011 © 2011 Marc Woods

Registered office Capstone Publishing Ltd. (A Wiley Company), The Atrium, Southern Gate, Chichester, West Sussex, PO19 8SQ, United Kingdom For details of our global editorial offices, for customer services and for information about how to apply for permission to reuse the copyright material in this book please see our website at www.wiley.com. The right of the author to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, except as permitted by the UK Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988, without the prior permission of the publisher. Wiley also publishes its books in a variety of electronic formats. Some content that appears in print may not be available in electronic books. Designations used by companies to distinguish their products are often claimed as trademarks. All brand names and product names used in this book are trade names, service marks, trademarks or registered trademarks of their respective owners. The publisher is not associated with any product or vendor mentioned in this book. This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold on the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering professional services. If professional advice or other expert assistance is required, the services of a competent professional should be sought.

Library of Congress Cataloguing-in-Publication Data (to follow) 9780857082664 (paperback), ISBN 9780857082718 (ebk), ISBN 9780857082725 (ebk), ISBN 9780857082732 (ebk) A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library. Set in 11/14 pt ITC New Baskerville by Toppan Best-set Premedia Limited Printed in Great Britain by TJ International Ltd, Padstow, Cornwall. Contents

Acknowledgements ix Preface to the second edition xi Introduction: What if? 1 1 Living Proactively: Don’t let life happen to you 9 2 Personal Responsibility: The best you can be 31 3 Goal Setting: Ever onwards 61 4 Motivation: What gets you out of bed? 81 5 Teamwork: All or nothing 105 6 Communication: Loud and clear 129 7 Adversity: Going under? 155 8 Role Models: A helping hand 185 9 Prejudice: Challenging misconceptions 207 10 That Little Bit Extra: What does success look like? 229 11 Resilience: Hanging tough 251 Afterword: A call to arms 271 About Marc Woods 275 Contributors 277 Notes 281 Index 285

Acknowledgements

Firstly, I would like to say thank you to Holly Bennion and her team at Capstone for suggesting we produce a second edition of this book. For their generosity in sharing their knowledge, experience and insights, I am indebted to the contribu- tors Jeanie Baker, Dave Bunting, Richard Davies, William Deeley, John Dunne, Professor Tim Eden, Donna Fraser, Jason Gardener, Lesley Garside, Matthew Heath, Kumar Kamalagharan, Georgina Lee, Jo Price, David Thomas, Bob Watts and Etienne de Villiers. Particular thanks must go to Lars Humer, whose support, insight and energy in creating ‘Coaches Corner’ has been fabulous and helped to breathe new life into each chapter. As ever, Steve Coomber’s input has been absolutely invaluable. His ability to ask the right questions, make sense of my answers, and understand how it would all fit together, has helped me keep my sanity. Receiving emails from Lars at the crack of dawn, before he headed off for morning training, and from Steve in the middle of the night as he burnt the midnight oil, brought its challenges and I must thank my wife, x · ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Petra, for understanding that my occasionally ‘pulling an all-nighter’ was a necessary evil if I was going to meet my deadline. Finally, I would like to thank my Mum, Dad and brother, without whom I would have never understood the concept of striving for my own personal best. Preface to the Second Edition

“It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.” Sir Edmund Hillary xii · PREFACE TO THE SECOND EDITION

A lot has changed in the five years since the first edition of this book hit the shelves. For a start, I’m five years older. And a little wiser. I have been pleasantly surprised at how well the first edition of this book was received. It sparked many an interesting conversation, and on more than one occa- sion someone has reached into their bag and pulled out a copy to make their point, usually referring with clarity to something that had, over time, become somewhat blurred in my mind. I’d like to thank all such people for keeping me on my toes. And whilst I’m speaking of people who keep me in line, my eagle-eyed Mum, who is at the same time my number one fan and greatest critic, even spotted the book making a brief cameo appearance on ‘CSI Miami’. Fame at last! My work on the speaking circuit, and talking to the many people I have had the pleasure of meeting as a result, has helped me keep pace with the changes in the world, and understand what matters to people in organizations. It has confirmed my feeling that, while workforces may be globally and culturally diverse, in some funda- mental ways people are the same the world over. A year or so ago, for example, one of my clients, a global phar- maceutical company, began the process of buying and merging with another of my clients, again a global busi- ness. At the time I was supporting them both, and I was struck by the fact that, regardless of which business people worked for, their fears were the same. Fear of what the future held, fear for security, fear of change. Perceptions of working life have also changed con- siderably over the last five years. A new generation of P rEFACE TO THE Second Edition · xiii

graduates has set about interviewing potential employ- ers, rather than the other way around, to see why they should give valuable hours of their life to a business. Global brands have ‘fans’ that follow them on social networking sites. As I write, Pringles, the chip/crisp brand – depending on which side of the Atlantic you are on – has over 14 million ‘likes’ on its Facebook page. And who would have thought that a form of communica- tion that didn’t exist in 2005 now sees a reality TV star being paid up to $10,000 for ‘tweets’ including product placement? However, increased globalization and more diverse ways of communicating have in some ways made it more difficult to make meaningful connections with people. Business colleagues sometimes fail to provide peers with their total support because they don’t feel that they really know each other any more. More than ever, there is a need for teams to take the time to understand one another. More recently, I have heard many concerns from people about the huge changes in the economic climate. The media have tried their best to find new ways of breaking the bad news, whether it is ‘credit crunch’, ‘double-dip recession’, ‘critical spending review’, ‘zombie economy’ or ‘sovereign debt crisis’. It all adds up to the same thing though – tough, uncertain times for organizations and individuals. The upheaval in which we find ourselves is almost unprece- dented, and the vast majority of the working population has never had to cope with such turmoil before. Businesses have been hit hard and, of course, this impacts on everyone. Interestingly, though, in the face of considerable change, rather than pull back there xiv · PREFACE TO THE SECOND EDITION

seems to be a greater than ever appetite for personal development. Businesses understand that it is the quality of their employees that helps distinguish them from their competitors. Individuals are realising that they need to take more responsibility for managing their own careers, and their training and development. (Of course the challenge of change is not necessarily a bad thing. Change comes in many forms. Since the publication of the first edition I have married and become a father, bringing new challenges to the Woods’ household, and much happiness too.) Whether it is because they are thriving on the chal- lenges provided by their work, desperately trying to hold on to their job, or setting off in a life-altering new direc- tion – for these and many other reasons, more people are trying to be the best they can be. So it is my conversations about these and many other issues that have shaped the completion of this new edition of Personal Best. I’ve refreshed and added to the contents of the book, introducing a chapter on resil- ience, for example, as well as providing some more practical insights courtesy of a ‘Coaches Corner’ section designed to help people get the most out of each chapter, and written by my former coach and good friend, Lars Humer. A former international athlete, Lars has subse­ quently coached individuals and teams to World, Para- lympic and Olympic success. His passion for coaching is infectious and it’s been a pleasure to work with him, both as a swimmer and now an author. I’ve learnt a lot from speaking at hundreds of events to tens of thousands of delegates, and listening to their questions, their thoughts, hopes, fears, their ideas, their P rEFACE TO THE Second Edition · xv

feedback. It has taught me that I still have plenty of room for improvement and that I can continue to enjoy my journey. Whether you choose to read this book in one sitting or dip in and out of it as and when you need some inspiration or insight, I hope you enjoy this edition of Personal Best. And I hope you enjoy your journey too.

Marc Woods, 2012

INTRODUCTION What if? 2 · PERSONAL BEST

My life might have been so different Have you seen the film ‘Sliding Doors’? It explores one of those big questions in life: what if? In the film, we see ‘what is’ and ‘what might have been’. The main char- acter is sacked from work and sets off for home via the London Underground: in one version of her life she catches a Tube train; in the other version, she misses it. An arbitrary event – the time she arrives at the train platform – sends her life in two totally different direc- tions, and the audience gets to see how both versions play out. Countless events shape the course of our lives, some significantly, some less so. And, as we get older, who doesn’t look back on life and reflect on how things might have been? What would my life have been like if I’d passed that exam? If I’d not lost that job? If I hadn’t met the person I married? The question I always come back to is: what would my life have been like if I had not got cancer? I think I know the answer. In my life without cancer, I make the passage from teenager to adult like any other ordinary teenager, untroubled by responsibility, unburdened by cares. Average at school, I remain average at college; I get an average job and I tick along, making do, getting by. I get a family, a house and a mortgage. For many years, the one escape in my life was swimming. I was a good swimmer as a boy – a county- level swimmer – but never an excellent swimmer. Because that kind of excellence requires the kind of commitment that an average teenager just doesn’t have. Not me, anyway. So, all in all, ordinary person, ordinary life. INTRODUCTION: WHAT IF? · 3

Like ‘Sliding Doors’, the ‘what if’ version of my life is in stark contrast to the ‘what might have been’ version. Not for me the carefree years of teenage irre- sponsibility. Oh no. In this scenario, I’m minding my own business when I get a swollen ankle. ‘So what?’ you say. Well, somehow, the swollen ankle turns into cancer. Not just any cancer either, but a nasty virulent cancer of the bone. The doctors tell me that if I don’t have part of my leg amputated, I’ll die. And if I do, I might still die – I’ll have a 50–50 chance, instead of no chance. So, minus part of my leg, I endure six courses of chemo and survive. Initially, not knowing what I might be capable of as an amputee, I turn to swimming. A good swimmer as a boy, I become an excellent swimmer – a member of the British swimming team and a highly competitive, motivated, committed athlete. My brush with mortality, ironically, makes me realize that I am capable of much more than I ever imagined. I set myself some tough chal- lenges and I achieve them. I knuckle down, strap myself in, and ride life’s rollercoaster. I win gold, silver and bronze medals. More than that, I climb mountains, do charitable work – I even write a book. Ordinary person, extraordinary life. Well, halfway there, maybe. Do I regret the way my life has turned out? No, not for a minute. I’m not going to say cancer is the best thing that ever happened to me. That’s too glib, too easy. I wouldn’t wish what I’ve been through on anyone else. But I have gained more than I have lost. It’s taught me to approach life in a different way. It’s taught me to measure myself against my potential and not against other people. It has taught me about personal 4 · PERSONAL BEST

responsibility: that life is about being the best person you can be and a lot more besides. I’ve been very lucky. I’ve learnt some tough but inval- uable lessons about life on my journey. I’d like to share those lessons with you.

MYIFE L I N B RIEF Summer 1985

One Saturday, at the start of my summer holidays, my ankle becomes swollen and is painful to walk on. The most energetic things I had done were to drink a cup of tea and watch television. Over the following months I go through numerous diagnostic processes and am eventu- ally told that, aged 16, I have a type of arthritis.

Christmas 1986

For over a year I hobble around, my left ankle gradually getting worse and starting to collapse. A new round of appointments with specialists and doctors begins. When I’m sent for a bone biopsy, I realize that whatever is hap- pening must be pretty serious. By this time, I just want to find out what is wrong. Two weeks before Christmas, I find out. I have cancer. I have to have my leg amputated. Christmas flies by, punctuated by gatherings of concerned-looking family members and more tests, this time at an oncology centre. I spend a lot of time thinking about what I will and won’t be able to do in the future as an amputee. INTRODUCTION: WHAT IF? · 5

New Year 1987

My first five-day-long chemotherapy session straddles the New Year celebrations. On the afternoon that I enter the hospital, I still have very little idea of what chemotherapy might feel like, or what it will mean to me. Within six hours of starting the treatment, I under- stand the language of chemotherapy. The cancer might kill me in the long run, but the chemotherapy feels like it is trying to kill me right now. January 1987

Amputation day approaches: 20 January 1987. Talking to my father before the operation, I want to find something I am able to do with one leg. Swimming seems to be the answer. I was a county swimmer before and I should be able to swim with one leg. Perhaps there are competitions especially for amputees. Before I even have my operation, my father enters me for the National Swimming Championships for the Disabled the follow- ing June! The amputation happens and I deal with it in my own way. The pain is not as all-consuming as I feared, but the phantom pains are both alarming and unplea­ sant. I celebrate my 18th birthday on 1 February, at the mercy of my phantom pains. January–June 1987

The chemotherapy continues to grind away at me, sapping my strength, testing my resolve. Meanwhile, I have my artificial limb fitted. 6 · PERSONAL BEST

May 1987

Outside the cancer ward, I’m desperate to keep hold of some level of normality. I go to see the school compete at a swimming gala.

June 1987

By the time I finish my treatment, I am literally half the man I used to be. I have lost both weight and a limb. I compete at the National Disabled Swimming Championships, which my father had entered me for six months previously. Surprisingly, I win three medals. I’ve come out of the other end of the tunnel fighting. It’s a fight I vow to carry on.

June 1987 onwards

Swimming becomes an even bigger focus for me once I finish my treatment. Soon I am swimming faster with one leg than I once did with two.

October 1988

Eighteen months after finishing my chemotherapy, I’m good enough and lucky enough to represent Great Britain at the Paralympics. I win two gold medals, one silver medal and two bronze medals, a feat I consider to be pretty respectable. I have turned my life around – from the ‘deathbed’ to the podium – in a relatively short time and both my family and I are thrilled. INTRODUCTION: WHAT IF? · 7

1988–2000

For the next 12 years, swimming is my priority. My father, who taught me to swim when I was 4, coached me when I went to Seoul. Now, when I go to university, I take on a new coach. I finish my degree, but it is the swimming that drives me on, and with my parents there as my number one fans, I win medals at both and . October 2000

I set my sights on competing in my fourth Games in and adding to my gold medal collection. All the preparations are going well and the 4 × 100 m freestyle relay team, which I’m part of, looks on track to win the gold at Sydney. Then, just two days before I am due to fly out, my father unexpectedly dies of a massive stroke aged just 57. I cancel my flight and, along with my brother, help my Mum to organize the funeral and deal with all the awful paperwork. The family is shattered. I want to be with my Mum and help her. But after discussing it, we decide that I really should go to Sydney. My father would have been furious with himself if he knew he was the reason why I didn’t go. And so, the day after his funeral, I take the long, lonely flight to Sydney – one of the hardest things I have ever done. My team-mates are there for me and help me through an awful situation. The race is a memorable one. The BBC’s Stuart Storey ranks it as his highlight of the games. We win the gold. It is both the best and the worst week of my life. 8 · PERSONAL BEST

2004

The relay team is victorious once again, which brings my Paralympic medal tally up to 12. As I climb out of the pool, I take some time to look back across the water and over to the spectators. I quietly say goodbye to that part of my life, then collect my things and walk away under the grandstand 2008

By now we know that London will host the London 2012 Olympic and Paralympic Games. I take on a new chal- lenge: commentating for the BBC. It feels strange not to be competing, I make plenty of mistakes, but enjoy the whole experience as Great Britain has a very successful Games. Today

I am no longer a competitive swimmer, but I have taken on new challenges. I have my own motivational speaking business, and a business consultancy. I also work with the Teenage Cancer Trust and the Youth Sport Trust, both of which do fantastic work to enhance the lives of young people. The biggest change for me, though, has been that I am now a husband and a father which, as for eve- ryone, brings its own challenges. So now, as I attempt to spin many plates, I often find myself thinking about my father, and that if I can get even close to being half the man he was I will be doing well. ONE Living proactively Don’t let life happen to you

“The will to do, the soul to dare.” Sir Walter Scott

“Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that is the stuff life is made of.” Benjamin Franklin 10 · PERSONAL BEST

THOUGHTS O N DIAGNOSIS

We arrived back home at around 1.30am, way past my parents’ bedtime, if not mine. The Parent–Teacher Asso­ ciation’s annual Christmas fundraiser at my school had been a real success. Not least, because I won six out of the ten raffle prizes – a large ham from the local butcher, a bottle of Liebfraumilch, a Christmas pudding, two boxes of chocolates and, of course, the obligatory gift box set of Old Spice aftershave and deodorant. The note from Dr Watkins was scribbled on a piece of paper and had been pushed through the letterbox:

Maurice, Give me a call on 875419 whatever time you get in. Dr Watkins

‘Do you think that it’s too late?’ Mum said, as much to herself as to Dad. But he was already punching in the number. ‘No, he knows we want to know the score as soon as possible.’ ‘Hello, Dr Watkins? Maurice Woods here. Right . . . OK . . . OK . . . we’ll see you in five minutes, then.’ He put the phone down and crossed the kitchen. ‘He told me that I should have a stiff drink and make him a cup of tea. He’s on his way round.’ Mum put the kettle on and put out the best cups and saucers on a tray. I glanced at my brother Ian, Ian at my Mum. My Dad was staring into thin air, his mind working at a million miles an hour as it always did. L iviNG PROActively · 11

Dr Watkins arrived, looking somehow older than when I had last seen him two weeks earlier. He took a seat and launched straight into what he had to tell us. ‘I know you are all eager to find out the results from the biopsy. I have been chasing Mr Evans for news, but he was keen to get a second opinion.’ His hands holding the cup and saucer shook. Not just a little tremble: it was so pronounced, it looked like a hammy actor trying to do ‘nervous’. ‘But it has been confirmed now. You have an oesteosarcoma, or bone cancer. You will have to have your leg amputated below the knee and six sessions of chemotherapy.’ Tears welled up in Dad’s eyes. ‘What if I don’t want to have my leg amputated?’ I asked. ‘Then you’ll die,’ was the instant reply. ‘Bone cancer is a very virulent type of cancer and this course of treatment has been proven to give the best prognosis. You will have one course of chemotherapy first, then your amputation, and then the other five bouts of chemotherapy.’ I left the room. In the kitchen I leant against the units and began to cry. ‘Don’t cry, mate,’ my brother said as he came in. ‘Why me?’ ‘You’ll be all right.’ And then I thought about it. What would my friends and peers think? What would I think if it was one of them that had cancer? I’d probably be mildly concerned, but it wouldn’t stop me from living. It wouldn’t stop me deliberating over what I would have for my tea. ‘You’re right, I will be all right,’ I said. ‘People aren’t going to be that upset for me, so I won’t let it upset me. 12 · PERSONAL BEST

What happens to me isn’t going to stop them living, so I won’t let it stop me from living.’ I’m not sure how much logic there was in that thought, especially given the circumstances, but at the time it seemed to make me feel a whole lot better. I didn’t know if I had six months, six years or sixty years left to live – but I did know that, from this moment on, I was going to live my life to the full. Until that moment, I had been the typical teenager, just happy to let life wash over me. But this was a pivotal moment in my life. It was the proverbial ‘kick up the arse’ and it made me realize that I no longer wanted life to just happen to me. From that point on, I wanted to take control of my own destiny as best I could.

DON’TET L L IFE H APPEN TOYU O

Before I was catapulted into the world of cancer, I was like most of the people I meet – I let life happen to me. From day to day, life impacted on me and I did very little to affect it. As humans, we have a predisposition to die. Every cell, from the moment it forms, is programmed to die. Every skin cell, every hair cell, every blood cell has a spell of life that is planned, before it self-destructs. Scientists call it ‘apoptosis’: programmed cell death. But sometimes, something goes wrong within the cell. Somehow the DNA gets damaged and the cell changes its attitude. A cancer cell is born and, given the chance, a cancer cell loves to live. It stops doing the tasks that its mother cell performed and then L iviNG PROActively · 13

begins to divide, replicating itself with a view to hanging around for as long as possible. It doesn’t self-destruct. Cancer cells are strong – they have character. All cancer cells are trying to do is live. The only way you can get rid of them is by poisoning (or irradiating) them into submission. That’s what the chemotherapy does. Chemotherapy encourages the cancer cell to commit suicide. People talk of cancer being sinister. They whisper about it under their breath as if the cells are listening. All cancer is trying to do is live, but it is life at all costs, life until its host is dead. It was only when I came face to face with these cells and their passion for life, so to speak, that I decided to be passionate about life myself. I was going to have an effect on my life and not just let life happen to me. It is amazing what it takes for some people, and I am including myself in this, to realize that life is a do-it- yourself thing. Many people need a push in life before they actually start living. They cite near-death experiences or the loss of a loved one as events that have made them re- evaluate their life and how they want to live it. Such things can force a period of self-reflection so thorough that it affects the very nature of how an individual wants to spend the rest of their days. They make a decision about how they want to actively approach life. But what about the people who haven’t suddenly been faced with their own mortality, or suffered a terrible loss or shock? Those people who are living life passively? I certainly don’t recommend searching out such experiences; instead, let’s try and learn from those who have been there.