A Munroist's Tale 3l March 2019 19:37

There was a man called Hugh Munro Who died a hundred years ago

One of the founder members of the SMC A worthy ambassador of the hill's was he

A Kirrie loon,who hailed from Lindertis And creator of the Scottish mountain list

Munro's tables as they became to be known A bible which all mountaineers should own

To religiously tick off the hills on the list ls a rewarding experience, should you persist

Some run over them all in under forty days While others spend a lifetime in more leisurley ways

A man with whom I proudly share a name To follow in his footsteps, became my aim

So lembarked on the Munro bagging game Little knowing, my life would never be the same

With likeminded members from the club in Stoney The memories I have, I could tellyou many a story

There's some of you here, have done a round of them a' And ae lad I ken, sweers blind that he's din twa

Munroitis is an illness, or so I'm told And very addictive when it takes a hold

Once you catch the bug, there is no known cure You're obsessed by ticking off a Ben or a Sgurr

A popular hobby that any able body can manage The number of hills makes the task quite a challenge

To get you started, it takes a lot of cash It's nae use buying ony auld cheap trash

A' body willtellyou that there's is the best Whether it's breeches or fleeces or HH vest

They'll swear by Buffalo, Goretex and Paramo Tea haud oot the wind and rain and snow

But take great care to look after your feet Because there's nothing worse if they get weet It's Brasher boots that you'll need to buy As they are the only ones to keep your feet dry

Then books and maps you'll need by the score lf you're ever to find your way to Ben More

And to use a map and compass you must know Before you venture out in the mist and snow

And once you've learned allthose lessons You'll be ready for the Mamores and Easains

Before you go out in the snow and ice I'll give you all a bit of sound advice

Skills that you'll need to learn real quick ls how to use crampons and an ice pick

You'll enjoy the winter hills so much more Without worrying that you'll end up in Raigmore

But whiles the weather will spoil your plan When the wind is howling owerStob Ban

Fin your lying there clinging tae the grun Your smile betrays that your having fun

It's then you know you've found your niche Oblivious to the elements on Sgurr na Ciche

Others may slack, or funk foulweather The Munroist goes forth to war whatever

Whiles you'll get four seasons in one day When traversing the ridge of Beinn Eighe

The weather can change there in a flash So it's off that hill that you must dash

And seek shelter in the Ben Damph Untilthe worst of the rain gings aff

But when the sun is shining way up high And your lucky enough to be on Skye

Then you'llget down to some serious bagging On the Cuillins hills, that surround Loch Laggan

The Glen Brittle hut is the place to stay While climbing there in the month of May

After a day in the hills, if your still feeling able There's high jink a plenty, like traversing the table

Some of the hills, they are affa remote Made much easier by catching a boat But to save yourself from a great long hike It's better if you make use of a mountain bike

When the days are short and there's nae much light You can bike in and out, and be home before night

Alas to climb the hills way out to the west Your accommodation winna aye be the best

You'll sleep in hauffs and village halls Huddled the gither wi'a'yer palls ln the back of a van, a tent, or even a byre Pretty soon, the art of roughing it you will acquire

And when to the wildernest you go to explore You'll come across a fine bothy at Carnmore

Places like Sourlies, Corrour, Shenavaland Alltbeith Are just some of the bothies, where you will stay

And many more you willcome across When searching for a place to doss

A bothy is a cheerless place, and likely damp Not what your looking for, after a long tramp

A pail of coal in ilka hand, and a rucksack full Will save you from freezing to death at A'Chuill

Or sleeping out in summer, under a starry sky Snug in your bivi bag, on a hillside way up high

Up where there's a breeze, on a mountain ridge To try to escape, from the dreaded midge

Some folk willsay, you must be feel To ging awa at night, to bide at Steall

Ye might fa' affthe brig in the dark And get soaked through, till yer sark

Of the dangers that lurk, they have no notion An obsession, worthy of single minded devotion

A hundred ticks now in your book, it's all going to plan Congratulate yourself, and take a celebration dram

When you get to two hundred, you believe that you might win There's just one thing stopping you, that dashed lnn Pinn

Nae need to fear, your club mates are here There's nothing they winna dae for a beer

They'll rope you up, there will be no cost lncluding your escort back to the Carbost Once over that hurdle, you can breath a sigh Only a few left to do, your nearly home and dry

That's if the SMC dinna change the list To include some hill, that you have missed

It's been a long journey from Glas Moal And now you've nearly reached your goal

Now at last, there's just one to go You made your choice a long time ago

Withe hostela'booked, you can do nae mair Your at the mercy of the weather, foul or fair

Reluctantly you step up to the mountain top Then bottles appear, and corks begin to pop

How many lifelong journeys have ended at this spot Another ambition has been fulfilled, you've done the lot

Do you see a'that high hills far awa I can scarcely believe I've done them a'

So what does the future hold for you Now that there's no more hills to do

Some folk retire to a life of leisure And remember their hill days with pleasure

For others, that are just beyond saving There's Corbetts next, to satisfy their craving

And when furth of Scotland, you may be ln England, Wales or over the lrish sea

From Scafellto Snowdon and on to Galtymore You'll find mountains there, to the tune of 34

Friendships that I've forged, through shared endeavour I treasure them all, Those are the ones that last forever

With those friends I've shared the joys and thrills While travelling the country and exploring the hills

The whole rich experience of the hills we know From Glen Clova in the east and west to Glencoe

Spending time in the mountains has enriched my life Given me peace, free from my troubles and strife

Sir Hugh's legacy has inspired a nation An expression of freedom for a generation

The Munro's are allthe world to me Up there, between the sunset and the sea