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)1 11 11 1( ' ) , I -, 1 1(' -7) Co►► •did ).75 Nord, Syndicate H)4 1:1- '(id.' I )c r I () 1994 Concordia University System Underway by Amy MacFee President Hoist is highly in favor of this this group is concerned with are as follows: How positive collegiate experience. Team five is com- cooperative network because it will allow CSP to do you live in harmony and appreciation of all stu- mitted to Assessment and Quality Control. This What? Concordia is becoming a university? have access to the strength and resources of nine dents on campus, and how does this affect the area builds on the work of the fourth team. Well, not exactly. Concordia St Paul is joining other colleges. He says in his support, school academically? Through this committee's Dr. Loma Meyer is the captain of the arms with all of the Lutheran Church-Missouri "Networking is the answer today. No one school efforts, they hope to promote this harmony Simultaneous Enrollment group. She explains this Synod colleges and universities throughout the can have all the resources that it needs on its through communication. President Hoist explains as an "umbrella" term with a triple focus. It con- United States. According to Mike Flynn, Vice own." This collaborative unit will "promote co- that each college is unique and therefore the issue sists of the Visiting Student, the Travel Study, and President for Development, "The ten-school, operative efforts while protecting the autonomy of diversity will be addressed at each individual the Distance Learning Programs. The Visiting inter-campus partnership will be characterized by of each school," says Hoist college. He says, 'The issue is common in its Student aspect presents an opportunity for stu- an enhanced quality of education for students, the Mike Flynn explained that there are 14 teams nature, but its application on each campus will dif- dents at one of the University System colleges to efficient allocation of resources and distinctive that are currently working on the initiatives and fer." He wants the different cultures to be repre- travel to another one for up to three quarters. inter-relational arrangements. Concurrently, the determining how to carry out the goals that have sented throughout different dasses such as in lit- Students must have completed at least one quar- distinguishing character, strength and autonomy been established. Each of these teams consists of erature classes. He sees this program as "a confir- ter at their "home campus" to participate in this of each institution will be affirmed." members from several of the ten schools involved mation of what we've already done here at CSP." program. The tuition would be paid at "home" The Concordia University System is being and each is headed by a captain. Dr.Loma Meyer But there are other schools in this system, such as and food and housing would be managed and developed in response to growing American states that, "Concordia St. Paul has fine represen- that in Austin TX, for example, which do not have paid for at the college of the student's choice. This Education concern. A task force has been set up to tation in these teams." as many programs set up to meet the multi-cul- program guarantees full credit transfer and an develop a system that 'builds national identity, The fourteen teams have been organized to tural needs. CSP is seen as a model in this area. opportunity for a "different experience on a dif- enables cooperative endeavors, and enhances the investigate one specific part of the system and cre- The third team deals with the Relationship of ferent campus," says Flynn. Dr. Loma Meyer strength of the colleges and universities of the ate a program that makes their goal a reality. The Concordia University To The Lutheran Church- hopes this program will "encourage and facilitate Lutheran Church -Missouri Synod as they engage first team is concerned with the Affective Missouri Synod. This committee zeros in on the movement among students from campus to cam- students of diverse ages and cultures in quality, Transmission of Lutheran Values. The second depth of involvement of the Church with the diP pus." Christ-centered, value-oriented, Lutheran higher team is tadding the issue of Cultural Diversity, ferent schools. The second part is the Travel Study Program, deal- education for lives of service of church and com- with President Hoist is the captain. Hoist doesn't Commitment To Student Success is the con- ing with overseas studies. This cooperation unit of munity." This gal has been the focus in the consider it a mistake that he was chosen as the cern of the fourth team. They are examining the all the schools will allow students to choose an efforts of staff and administrators from the ten leader of this committee since CSP is so advanced needs of the students and developing ways to experience from any of the ten colleges. This institutions involved in this change. in its cultural diversity efforts. The questions that assist students in having a more successful and University Continued on page 3 The GOP Regains Control After 40 Years by Theresa Seto final vote total, according to the November 10, 1994 edition of the St fawn Pioneer Press , Election Day, Tuesday, November 9, 1994, showed Carlson at 1.1 million votes and Marty marked a sizeable sweep for the Republicans. The at fewer than 600,000 votes. According to GOP gained eight seats in the United States Ragsdale, a writer for the Pioneer Press, Senate, altering a 55:45 Democratic majority to a Marty's defeat is the worst in the history of the 47:53, Republican majority. In the U.S. House of DFL • Representatives, the GOP party gained 52 seats, The United States Senate seat was taken which now puts the GOP at 230 members to 204 by Independent-Republican Rod Grams, who Democratic seats. beat his opponent, Ann Wynia, by 48% - 45% The final results for the Minnesota election margin. Seats for the U.S. congress were bipar- are as follows: Independent-Republican endorsed tisan by district: First district, IR Gil Gutknecht Incumbent, Arne Carlson won the gubernatorial over DR John C. Hottinger, Second district, Jolly Old St. Nick— election against DR endorsed John Marty. The GOP Continued on page 2 Have you been naughty or nice???

INSIDE New Tobacco Policy Christmas Concerts! Concordia Speaks... Men's and Women's The Great Cross Starts 1-1-95 On Santa Clausrn? Hoops Reviews Controversy see pg. 3 see A & E see Variety see Sports See Editorials P9. 6 pg. 9 pg. 10 pg. 12

Friday December 16, 1994 Page 2 News

GOP 8, 1994 by the St Paul Pioneer Press, President planning, especially in holding state spending to Grams' platform regarding this year's elec- continued from page 1 Clinton commented on problems with the balance the budget without increasing taxes; 2) to tion embraces a promise that he will never vote Republican Program: "Both Senate Republicans create a "seamless education system" from early for a tax increase and will vote to cut federal DFL David Minge over Independent Stan Bentz and House Republicans are promising big tax cuts learning through apprenticeships to higher edu- spending Grams also opposes gun control and and IR Gary B. Revier; Third district, incumbent IR for wealthy people and big spending increases cation, including high, measurable academic stan- supports anti-abortion issues. Issues that Grams Jim Ramstad; Fourth district, incumbent DFL and a balanced budget. Now, the only way that dards; 3) to reform a welfare system that present- supports are divided into eight different cate- Bruce C. Vento; Fifth district, incumbent DFL can be financed is if they [Republicans] cut every- ly undermines work and families; 4) to change gories: 1) Reproductive choice which supports Martin Sabo; Sixth district, DFL William P. Luther thing else about 20%, including Social Security; costly workers' compensation systems that drive constitutional rights for the fetus. 2) Deficit over IR Tad Jude; Seventh district, incumbent DFL they will have to cut everything else in the budget businesses out of state. Control which supports means testing for entitle- Collin Peterson; Eighth district, incumbent DFL Medicare, Student Loans, agriculture supports. It Carlson also supports preexisting health care ments, a balanced budget amendment, and line James L Oberstar. would be a devastating thing for Medicare. If they condition coverage, portable insurance coverage, item veto. 3) Environment which supports Other candidate; who were elected include [Republicans] don't intend to balance the budget malpractice reform, money for rural hospitals, stronger measures to protect wetlands, stronger Lieutenant Governor, Joanne Benson; Secretary of but just do what they did before in the 1980s, then programs to prevent teen pregnancy, parental water quality standards, and promotes non- State for her sixth term, Joan Growe; and Attorney you're looking at the deficit going way up and the consent for teen abortions, state-funded educa- laclear energy sources. 4) Criminal Justice which General for his fourth term, Hubert H. Humphrey economy going down again. Only 23% of voters ton, a longer school year, term limits for legisla- supports a "3 strikes and you're out" legislation, 111. know that we had the biggest deficit reduction in tcrs and constitutional officers, and non-partisan more money for drug treatment and education, A side note that also came up on the ballots 20 years.' legislative redistricting commissions, further increased dollars to build prisons, and more use during election regarded the OffTrack Betting Staff writer, Bill Salisbury of the November 9, reform of workers compensation, tax incentives to of electronic monitoring. 5) Social Policy which (OTI3) amendment The question addressed was 1994 edition of the StPaul Pioneer Press, com- attract businesses, economic development incen- supports work requirements for welfare recipi- whether the Minnesota Constitution should be mented on Cadson's victory. His win has been tives to Greater Minnesota, money to help farmers ents, interstate collection of child support, fund- amended to permit off-track wagering on horse attributed to a solid economic record, referring to meet feed lot environmental standards, expansion ing for early childhood education, more money racing in a manner prescribed by law; the result- the $623 million budget surplus: "When he in loan programs for beginning farmers, continua- for low income housing, and money for domestic ing vote was "NO." [Carlson] took office in 1991, the state was in a tion of lawsuits to overturn federal milk pricing, violence shelters. 6) Foreign Policy which sup- The past mid-term election was an important recession, businesses were dosing, thousands of expansion of the ethanol incentive program, work ports the GAIT Treaty, and a tightened immigra- election for President Clinton, the U.S. House of Minnesotans were out of work, and he faced a requirements for welfare recipients, more money tion policy. 7) Health Care which supports preex- Representatives, and the U.S. Senate, especially $1.8 billion shortfall in the state budget that he for domestic violence shelters, tougher child sup- isting condition coverage, portable insurance cov- since the Executive Branch (President) is held by inherited from DFL Governor Rudy Perpich." port enforcement, incentives for communities to erage, and malpractice reform. 8) Government a Democrat and the Democratic Legislative Under Carlson's governorship, and with the promote a housing mix, lowering tax rates on low Management which supports Congressional term Branch (Senate and House) has held control in help of the "national economic recovery," the income rental property, regional housing policies, limits. both houses for the past 40 years. state's economy has dramatically taken a new money for violence protection, and a "3 strikes Other priorities Grams has stated upon elec- In this midterm fight between parties the direction. Thousands of new jobs have been cre- you're out" legislation. tion include cutting taxes for middle-class House needed 40 Republican seats to gain control ated, unemployment is at a 16-year low and the Many incumbents for the state of Minnesota American families and eliminating the budget and the Senate needed seven seats. The state has a budget surplus. Carlson has also led kept their seats in the U.S. House of deficit His "Families First" legislation accomplish- Republican/GOP party has not had control of both the state through a recession and budget obsta- Representatives, but as for the U.S. Senate, the es tax cuts for families by providing working fami- Houses since 1954. The fight for control brought cles with few tax increases and minimal damage to seat was open during this election year. Current lies with an annual $500 per child tax credit ($500 President Clinton out on the circuit on behalf of the state's high-quality schools, parks, roads, wel- Independent- Republican Senator, Dave million for Minnesota families), and placing a two endorsed Democratic candidates. As for fare programs and other high quality services. Durenberger did not run for reelection this term. percent cap on spending growth, which would Minnesota, President Clinton came to the state As governor for a second term, Carison's first He has held his seat on the Senate for the past six- balance the budget in eight years. three times in support of DFL. endorsed Senate four priorities for the upcoming term are 1) to teen years and will be replaced by the newly elect- These were the prominent issues addressed candidate, Ann Wynia. fight to control government spending by setting ed Independent- Republican Rod Grams at the in this year's election. Every person has a voice In a brief interview, conducted on November priorities, making tough choices and long-term end of the year. when it comes to governmental issues. If you dis- agree or agree, you can make your voice heard by contacting your local district representative or State Senate. You voted, you have a voice, and Not Just Money your voice can make a difference! 5?

by Theresa Monette Fay Hare's area handles accounting, bud- unorganized group of systems to a central and geting, financial analysis, cashiering and cash man- more accessible one. Payroll has moved and Rena When someone mentions finances, usually agement, student accounts, auditing, banking, Miller has helped arrange for direct deposit and he or she is referring to money. The Concordia financial statements, and institutional insurance. other student-oriented services. Part-time house- College finance department not only handles bud- Dan Meuwissen is in charge of security, vehicles, keeping staff has changed the look of many getary concerns, but also carries many other food service, mail room, bookstore, purchasing, Concordia buildings to make them cleaner and responsibilities. Most of these activities impact copiers, environmental safety, and keys. Mary more inviting. Planning for GC and LMC events students daily, and yet most students are probably Arnold controls human resources, payroll, by the community has helped lower the overall unaware of the finance department's responsibili- employee training and development, employee cost for maintaining these facilities and rentals ties to the college. Further, there have recently benefits, and policies and procedures. John Chitty extend as far in advance as two years. Finally, a been many important changes to this department takes care of custodial, housekeepin& plant oper- master calendar of all campus events is on the which impact all students. ations, grounds, buildings, and minor construc- verge of completion so that students have a cen- Vice President for Finance Gene Muilenburg tion. Hal Raether coordinates Gangelhoff Center tral place to look at what is in their future. facilitates the many areas in his division. He is also (GC) rentals, GC event coordination, Lutheran involved with strategic planning for the college, Memorial Center (LMC) rentals, and LMC event These and many other new campus services, facilities acquisitions, and a variety of other ser- coordination. Bruce Nustad works with off cam- like Marriott dining and improved parking condi- vices. There are six divisions that he coordinates. pus student housing, campus facilities rentals and tions, are part of the financial services improved The divisions and their operators are Fay Ham, events, and the master calendar. staff and student-centered approach. Gene Director of Financial Operations; Dan Meuwissen, Many of these job titles are new or have been Muilenburg states that what his division strives for Director of Auxiliary Services; Mary Arnold, recently enhanced because of organizational is to be "sensitive to students while remaining Director of Human Resources; John Chitty, changes within the finance department. These responsible to the institution." It would seem that Director of Plant & Operations; Hal Raether, GC changes affect students in many ways: student this goal will be even better attained with the & LMC Coordinator; and Bruce Nustad, accounts has become more customer-oriented improvements and changes occurring. Look for Facilities Manager. Each of these divisions has its and user- friendly, mostly as a resuk of position information about specific areas of interest at the own subdivisions that include staff and students changes when Chris Tesch and Stephanie offices of the above individuals, and if the person alike. Also, each of the areas has its own distinct Johnson were added as co-partners in this divi- desired is difficult to find, just ask t responshdities to the college. sion. The copiers are moving from a sporadic and

Page 3 Friday December 16, 1994 News

University increase." For example if all the colleges united continued from page 1 under one food plan, then the prices for food Tobacco-Free Campus could potentially decrease. The Electronic Library, of which Dr. Glen January 11, 1995 expands the opportunity of different experi- Offermann is a member, is the effort of Team 10. NEWS RELEASE ences. The third part is Distance Learning. This ibis system would connect all the libraries on one Receptacles for cigarette, cigars and other is also the responsibility of team seven. unit . The Colic network and other local informa- tobacco products will be positioned near key Distance learning is an interactive television tion opportunities would also be available. This CSP becomes a tobacco-free campus effec buildings on campus (approximately 20 feet from tive January 1, 1995. program that would enable students to "draw connection with the other libraries would be addi- entrances). Smokers must smoke outdoors, at on the strength of all campuses." For example, tional. Individually designated on-campus residen- least 20 feet from any building to insure entrances students could enroll in a class at cu. that Leadership Training is the responsibility of tial rooms and off-campus housing are exempted are free of smoke. would be taught at Concordia Moorhead via Team 12. This relates to the Faculty Identification from this policy. Al other indoor areas on campus The college will offer support services to this telecommunication network In effect, stu- because it would train the peons who were iden- are tobacco-free, thus creating a "Clean Indoor Air those individuals wishing to discontinue a tobacco dents could take a class through television, and tified as potena leaders. Policy." Beyond the exception listed above, tobac- habit. Periodic seminars conducted by the still interact as if they were present in the Committee 13 is the National Council For co is not permitted in entrances to buildings, College, the American Cancer Society, or the Moorhead classroom. Dr. Meyer considers all The Identification And Cultivation Of Funding offices, tunnels, classrooms, dining hall, student American Lung Association will be offered free of three of these areas to be "enriching experi- Sources. Mike Flynn is the co-captain of this team. union, athletic facilities, and all other indoor charge. The college nurse will coordinate this ser- ences" for students. This group is working on the development of a areas. vice. Team eight is working on the develop- 6:zeling cabinet that would consist of individuals ment of an active program that would identify who either have knowledge of funding or have the STUDENTS! potential faculty among the students. This money themselves. This is a key part of the Earn extra cash Faculty Identification and Development team University System because it holds the key to its for school supplies! would target students who seem to possess the success. Distance Learning will not be a possibility characteristics of a qualified professor after without funding for it ∎‘t 1 1/ receiving further education. This team would Finally, Committee 14 is the Ease your work dosely with Team 12. Communications and National Image This com- cash crunch .00 Emily Moore, captain of Team 9, along mittee is the "marketing arm" that is in charge of by donating at Plasma Alliance. with the members of this team, are investigat- the promotion of the program. As Mike Flynn Watch a movie or ing ways to help students minimize the amount describes it they help to "get the mime out there." read while our of time they spend at school. The Decreased This program is exciting and will put Concordia courteous staff attends to you in Completion Time unit is trying to assist stu- on the cutting edge. Th By fall 1995, the our newly remodeled dents and encourage them to make "efficient Simultaneous Enrollment program will have its facility. New donors receive $30 on their 0( pilot year. This experimental year will send five use of their time," says Flynn. With the incor- first visit. (Student ID 1 poration of the Distance Learning and willing students to any of the ten colleges of their with proof of Social Security number Visitation programs, students will be able to choice and CSP will accept five students. The required.) decrease their time in school because if a class interest in this program will be evaluated. Many of is not offered at their "home college," they can the other teams are still meeting and preparing for Call for more take it from another college. the final development of their efforts. This information.

The tenth team is System Effidendes: University System is a reality and will begin to be 646 - 2556 Consolidated Services. This is where the joining incorporated throughout all LCMS campuses. The plasma affiance of the ten schools can be an asset financially. time line calls 1994-5 the Testing and 1054 University Avenue President Hoist explains, "Hopefully by work- Demonstration year, and 1995 will hold the earli- St. Paul, MN ing closely together, the purchasing power will est stages of implementation.

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WHAT "OK' THOUGHTS/FEELINGS HAVE YOU HAD SINCE DRINKING "OK"? PLEASE FILL IN THE "OK" RED BOX ABOVE AND SEND IT TO US, OR SEND PHOTOGRAPH OF SELF WITH RED BOX TO: "OK" SODA, P.O. BOX 4466, BLAIR, NE 68009. INCLUDE YOUR NAME AND ADDRESS, AS WE MAY WISH TO USE YOUR SUBMISSION FOR ADVERTISING PURPOSES, OR EXPLOIT IT IN SOME OTHER WAY WE HAVEN'T FIGURED OUT YET. (MUST RECEIVE BY 12/31/94.)

Friday December 16, 1994 A IE Page 6 The Message of Christmas "From Heaven Above"

by Kristine Ranweller on a hymn written by Martin Luther and is struc- Christmas carols and songs tured around how Luther wrote the hymn. Luther that we can sing along with. Has Christmas sneaked up on you and found composed the song for a Christmas program and This concert promises you unprepared for the season? This time of separated it into two parts: the angel's message to be a celebration of music Advent allows us to prepare for the recognition of and our response to it on earth. Many variations of that will allow us and inspire Christ's birth. The Concordia Christmas Concert this hymn will be performed by the different musi- us to prepare for the provides a perfect occasion for us to enter into the cians. upcoming celebration of spirit of Christmas. Several other pieces will be used to build on Christ's birth. Once again, we have the opportunity to the theme including "Christmas Cantata" by Tickets are still avail- enjoy beautiful musk presented by Concordia's Charpentier which will be performed by Jubilate able for the 7:30 concerts in Christi's and Jubilate Choruses, handbell and and "Navidad Nuestra" by Ramirez, a mariachi- the music auditorium on string ensembles, and brass and percussion style cantata that the Christus Chorus will sing,. Saturday and Sunday From Heaven Above—A Majestic ensemble. Dr. Jeffrey Burkart will narrate the Another interesting piece will be 'Time in evenings, December 17th Scene at St. Paul Cathedral evening for us as we listen to the choirs directed Space." This song incorporates an interview with and 18th. Tickets are free! by Dr. David Mamidce and the handbell choir led Russell Schweickart who did the first unattached Students who are not on the campus meal plan This will be a traditional service of lessons and car- by Sue Southwick. Other faculty members space walk, a poem, and the words "Dona nobis may also want to get tickets for the Sunday after- ols led by Christus, Jubilate, and the handbell involved or directing in the concert include John pacem" (Grant us peace). The song will be accom- noon buffet. All tickets can be obtained by calling ensemble. This will be a wonderful send-off into Roth, Dr. John Eggert, Prof. Sarah Hersh, Dr. panied with a dance interpretation by Called to 641-8860. the Christmas holiday. Kathryn Schenk, and Prof. lam LaFontaine. Dance. Also...Cluistmas Choral Vespers will be held The theme "From Heaven Above" is based Of course there will also be familiar at 7:30 in the chapel on Monday, December 19. God's blessings and Merry Christmas. 9 Christmas Cinematic Greetings

by Wendy Fitzlienry & Marc Wedo who...how can you possibly explain this plot is an enjoyment to see. (WF). four sentences or less? Ok, we won't. Here are the Actually, despite my biggest fears (further accu- If you feel more in the mood for Christmas Tis the season for Christmas movies. The main players: James Spader as the professor, Kurt mulated by the fact that Beatty had his hand in spirit, try renting a classic (or going to the two holiday rush is in full swing, and you can find a Russell as the strong but silent colonel who producing and writing the picture), Love Affair is Christmas films currently out). We would recom- wide selection of soon-to-be classics (and a few accompanies the brain on his quest to the origins something not to be forgotten. Don't compare it mend The Grinch That Stole Christmas, Miracle movie turkeys) everywhere. Below, we will give of ardent Egypt, the U.S. government (as usual, to earlier pieces, just view it for itself. Love Affair on 34th Street (old or new), A Christmas Story, you our Christmas gift—the words of wisdom wanting to destroy something wonderful), and holds up to today's standards for a romantic, and, most of all, White Christmas. trom two experienced moviegoers who probably Jaye Davidson as the sexy god Ra. cheerful, sweet little film. See this one now, or May your visions be filled with sugar plums and have too much to say. Be sure to heed our words. The cinematography is exceptional (filming save it for Valentine's Day. Beatty and Bening do movie stars, Egyptian gods, the Empire State Take your kid brother or sister to a movie took place in Arizona for the desert scenes). The this story sweet justice. It's a wonderful piece to (we suggest sd-fi or The Lion King) or take grand- lines drawn between this alien world and ancient take mom or grandma to and let than reminisce Building, and Klingons—and may all your wishes ma to see Love lair. Anyway, when you are Egypt are fascinating The amount of movie you about the earlier versions of this beautiful story come true. Happy Holidays. 9 bored over the lengthy Christmas vacation that is get is definitely worth the price. Take your kid sib- upon us, drop by your local bijou and check the lings to this one. While it may be a bit violent at films out times, anyone who watches mutant creatures on Star Trek Generations is another great TV should be able to handle this. Four big thumbs chapter in the saga of the U.S.S Enterprise (how- up. ever many there are now). This Star Trek is set The last movie I saw with Warren Beatty was apart from others by the fact that it indudes all of Dick Tracy. That dates all of us. That was back in the cast from Star Trek The Next Generation, as his playboy years. He was romancing Madonna, well as three actors from the original Star Trek. At and then another woman, and then another long last Captain Picard and Captain Kirk meet woman, and eventually Annette Bening (his cur- and join forces to stop the bad guy (this time its rent wife). I was leery of their marriage, but so far Dr. Soren played by Malcolm McDowell) from it has stood up to the test of Hollywood. destroying stars in order to reach a strange space Surprisingly, they seem to be very happy (and phenomena known only as The Nexus." I saw this have at least one child to show for it). movie over Thanksgiving, and I thought that it Well, they got the opportunity to show their was exceptional love on screen through Love Vair a remake ofAn Since I've seen this film, I've been more Affair to Remember, which is a remake of an even Guys & Dolls—The finalle of another successful production prone to hear comments and rumblings in the earlier movie called Love Affair. Now, everyone hallways and classrooms from Trekkers and non- remembers An Affair to Remember. Ah, Cary Trekkers alike. Most people agree that it is at least Grant and Deborah Kerr. We all fell in love with it a normal caliber Star Trek film, but there are a few (especially after Sleepless in Seattle made it the A & E News Release who were disappointed with it. 'There weren't basis for its plot), and more specifically, we all fell enough space battles" and 'I can't believe they in love again with Cary Grant Well, Warren Beatty by Tom Langemo Off-Campus Entertainment killed Captain Kirk!" are two of the most common is not Cary Grant Don't get me wrong, but Concordia Entertainment Events: January 15 - March 11- Andrew Lloyd Webber's phenomenal Broadway smash 'The complaints. I can only offer one dosing bit of nobody can duplicate Cary's charm, finesse, and December 17 & 18: The Annual Concordia Phantom of the Opera" will be returning to our advice: If you go to this movie expecting the old his voice ("We sunk a trued'). And Annette, well, Fine Arts Concert will take place in the Buetow territory. It will be performed in the Historic Trek, then dunces are fair that you will be disap- she isn't Deborah Kerr either. But in this remake, Music Auditorium. The concert is free, but there Orpheum Theatre. Tickets are $35, $50, $60, and pointed. Keep in mind that this is a new that doesn't really seem to matter. will be a freewill offering. There will be a perfor- Enterprise and a new crew. In my opinion, we Pierce Brosnan is Annette's man, Kate mance each night at 7:30 p.m. and a matinee at $65. There are performances every day accept Mondays. should let them take the Enterprise to new fron- Capshaw is Warren's woman—both have solid per- 3:00 p.m. on the 18th—there will be a buffet tiers and "boldly go" where Captain Kirk and his formances, but I still cannot believe that someone between the two performances on the 1&h. February 21 - March 4- "Les Miserable" will be crew did not After all, from here on out they are would leave Pierce for Warren. Oh well. Other returning to Minnesota It will be performed in December 19: The Christmas Vespers service on their own. (MW) supporting actors indude Gary Shandling and the Ordway Music Theatre. Tickets range from will take place in the Graebner Memorial Chapel In the spirit of Wendy's birthday and her Chloe Webb, also doing great jobs as the comic $29 - 55. appreciation of good science fiction, we decided relief. One special person to look for is Katherine at 7:30 p.m. July 12 - 23- "Angels in America: Millennium to journey to another world (and time) in Hepburn, whom Beatty reportedly had to beg to *Celebrate the birth of the Christ-child and the Approaches and Perestroika" will be coming to Stargate. This two hour epic has enough action be in the film. Ms. Hepburn, of course, plays the anticipation of the return of Christ in this Advent Minnesota. This set of plays has gotten rave and plot for at least three movies. This is an excit- aunt, and she does a beautiful job as a loving old and Christmas season by joining your Concordia reviews on Broadway and will, I'm sure hit big in ing and quick ending sd-fi that feels like Star spinster. You are touched by the magic and grace Fine Arts endeavors in Christian praise within our the Cities. Try to make plans for this one. Wars, has the archeology of Indiana Ames, and she still possesses. college community. February: The Ethnic Dance Theatre will be the magic of Close Encounters of the Third Kind. The directing is wonderful. There are some offering classes in, you guessed it, ethnic dance. There's romance (ok, one kiss) , action, killing, January 4 - February 3: Bill Slack will have a interesting angles taken with light, and director Brochures are now available and classes are open Prints Exhibition in the Music Building gallery. aliens, cool glowing eyes, and a little Egyptian god Glenn Gordon Caron (Moonlighting) plays with to all those willing from ages Kindergarten - There will be a reception for him and his work named Ra. colors and darkness throughout the film. The Adult. Call (612) 872 - 0024 for more details or on January 9, 7 - 9 p.m. The plot is basic and complicated at the screenplay stays true to the remake of the original, for your brochure on the classes. same time. James Spader is a geeky Egyptologist with a few fun variations; and the movie is overall

Page 7 A IE Friday December 16„1994 Vitalogy and Christmas

the Black Circle" which were played every other But then there are the songs that make the I wish Beavis and Butthead would lay a finger hour on the EDGE. listener simply wonder. There's "Bugs," Vedder's on Bart Simpson's Butterfmger and pay the ulti- Anyway, Pearl Jam's new album Vitalogy was ranting about insects in his hair and on his body mate price at Bart's hands. released on December 6. (Some people probably and then deciding to join them coupled with a I wish that a new Christmas album would be went to the record store just after midnight so demented accordion (Huh?), "Pry, to," one released featuring the following: Rush does wrhe they could hear it as soon as it was released; I did minute of Vedder spelling P-R-I-V-A-C-Y (Hey Ed, little Drummer Boy," Queensrych does "Silent do that.) Once again, just as when vs was after once or twice we get the picture), and Night," They Might Be Giants does "The Twelve released, those who were looking for something "Stupid Mop" also listed as "hey foxymophandle- Days of Christmas," and Rage Against the Machine that compared to Ten, their first release, were dis- man, that's me," seven minutes of screechy gui- does "Joy to the World." appointed. I have to admit that I was a bit disap- tars and a dialogue about suicide (let's hope we I wish the following tributes, duets, pointed by this effort, only because it is Pearl jam. don't see another Kurt Cobain, this time with remakes, and tours would or could happen: Anyone else who did this album most likely would even more warning). Harry Cowlick Jr. does Led Zeppelin, Tom Jones have been lauded. The fact remains that if a per- Even though "Vitalogy" contains some ques- does Nine Inch Nails, Snoop Doggie Dog's does a son were to rate Pearl Jam's albums best to worst tionable songs, the other eleven make another tribute to country and western and James it would still be in the order they were released. Pearl Jam album well worth getting. Hetfield, lead singer of Metallica, plays the cow- The album has some excellent songs and For our special Christmas issue, I have been ardly lion in The Wizard of Oz. Wait a minute, by Brian Wllhorn some that, as far as I can tell, really have no point asked to include a Christmas wish list. With help that's already come true. Jimmy Buffet and Jimi being on the album. Songs like "Spin the Black from Tim DaMe, Donavon Riley, and Chad Whitt, Hendrix would team up and James Brown and Over the last few weeks, anyone who cared Circle," Pearl Jam's tribute to vinyl, "Tremor here is my not even half-serious but definitely half- James Taylor would team up, Roger Waters would to hear what the neat Pead Jam album was going Christ," and "Satan's Bed" are heavier sounding baked Christmas wish list return to Pink Floyd to remake the"Grease" to sound like could simply listen to the EDGE and than anything they have ever done and are some Since I've written about Pearl Jam, I wish soundtrack, and Nancy Reagan would sponsor the hear every song played over the course of a week of the great songs on the album. "Nothingman" Eddie Vedder would sing in my shower every Grateful Dead and Cypress Hill in the "Just Say No end. (Some people probably sat by the radio and and "Better Man" are slow, quieter songs that morning so I could wake up to it—they wouldn't Tour '95" to help combat the war on drugs. taped every song so they could be cooler than equal the melodic "Daughter" and "Elderly do songs like "Bugs". I also wish Eddie and the Maybe I should just wish for world peace. their friends; I didn't do that) Even those who Woman Behind the Counter in a Small Town" on rest would live long enough to do about 20 more didn't care probably heard "Better Man" or "Spin "Vs." excellent Pearl Jam albums. "Before Ellington...!"

by Tom Langemo tie boy in a candy store, totally drawn into the done work on Broadway with Gregory Hines and (death/narrator) guides Jelly through his years of weave of energy just from the atmosphere of the Tommy Tune. Starring at the age of twelve as the life, from the younger years to the time of his When I first received word of the upcoming theatre and the fellow patrons. I was probably title role in the musical The Tap Dance Kid, gave death. Through the scenes we see Jelly change performance of Jelly's last Jam I thought, annoying the bejeebers out of my friends who him a boost into the theatre world. He was nomi- from innocence in the Creole family which vault- "Hmmm ...interesting. Jelly Roll Morton? Who's were with me by asking them questions left and nated for a Tony in Black and Blue. He co-starred ed him into the extreme deep-freeze of his soul. her" It became a fleeting thought and a secondary right and pointing to things throughout the whole in the movie Tap with Gregory Hines and Sammy Wealth and power set in, practically destroying all aspect to my theatre agenda for the year. In fact, I spectrum of the house. Davis, Jr., and has become a common face to see relations with his best friend and confidante, Jack basically forgot about it. Then I was sitting in my The lights went low, the audience was silent, in the all-time favorite television series Sesame the Bear and Anita, his love and trusted care- Theatre History I class and it was offered as a pos- and before the show even started I wanted to Street. He is also the youngest performer in histo- giver—no matter how he hurt her. sible activity for the class for the following scream. Its the feeling, you know? The idea that ry to receive a grant from the National Folks, rm running out of room and I'm just evening. I thought, "Heck Eight bucks for two you know something fantastic is about to happen Endowment for the Arts. He played the part of the not sure what else to say in the shrinking space. It hours of musical is good for me. I might as well go to the microcosm of the world which is the the- young Jelly Rot was a fabulous performance in dance, costume, see what this whole 'Jelly' thing's about anyway." atre. My skepticism was gone. I was wrapped up in Unfortunately, I do not have enough space set, music, acting, directing, and in all other tech- It's not that I wasn't interested anymore or that my own anticipation. to write about every performer for this show. nical aspects. The story is fascinating. At times my curiosity wasn't piqued, but again, I was skep- Then the music began: perfect hits, blasts, because. All—even those with non-speaking you're cheering and wanting to scream "Yes!" at tical (I just didn't let it show). and swa er sugared the air. This was not the roles—have outstanding credential. the top of your lungs and in the same scene, just So there we were—my professor, three other music where you listen attentively, sitting in your So who was Jelly Roll Morton, anyway? Well, moments later, you want either to pound the per- dassmates, and myself trying to fight our way cushy seat, and smile, nod, and clap in the polite he began life as Ferdinand Le Menthe, born in the son next to you or cry the paint off the walls. IT IS through Holi-Dazzle, full parking ramps, and a Minnesota way after the performer makes the high society of the Creole of New Orleans. He GOOD!!! bunch of glittered stiffs at some honorable func- transition into the continuing action of the scene. found himself too adventurous and found himself Now, I know that it was done last Sunday. tion for which my companions and I were not suit- This was the music to make your ears flare, your in the society of ill-repute, where he got his begin- The pre-performance sales weren't too hot. ably dressed. All-in-all, the evening was off to a eyes drive wild, your hair tingle in the roots, and ning fame for piano excellence. He left New People didn't know about it. I'm a classic example! humorous start. your rear-end want to leap to the rotunda, butt Orleans, traveling the eastern country with his But the response was stupendous and I have a To add to this excitement was the thrill of the top and fly to the stage to dance your life away companion Jack the Bear. He ended up in feeling that this show will be back. Perhaps the going to the theatre. Now, as I said before, I was with those who put you in this state of explicit Chicago, where he became famous with his jazz same actors won't be back, but don't go simply for somewhat apprehensive about what I was about emotional speed. Not once was I bored; not once band The Red Hot Peppers. He fell in love, fell out them. Go for the culminating experience of true to see at the Historic State Theatre. But it's the did I think the music was sloppy or that the of love, pretended love to get "love" ("no one rolls art in theatre. jelly Roll was a master musician and electricity you feel in your nerve-endings when singers could have been better or that the acting like the Roll"), left the many women he had created phenomenal music. It is only fitting that you are anywhere near a performing arts estab- and directing could have been improved. "loved", and finally ended up with no love or the show to tell his story suits his spirit to the lishment (knowing that you'll soon be in, assisting George C. Wolfe wrote and directed the love" to speak of (at least that he could see). His fullest Please, if it comes back in town (again, I'm in the production of that colossal magic) that musical. He is known for his work with the Angels music was created from an enticing blend of sure it will) go to id You simply will not regret it. always gets me rockin' in my Reeboks. in America series for which he won the Tony French opera (to which he was originally "No one rolls like the Roll"—except the musical to This was my first time at this particular the- Award. He also wrote The Colored Museum, exposed), African rhythms, ragtime, and blues. By tell his story. t atre. I was blown away by gold-plated wall sculp- which he later co-directed for PBS Television's the 1930's his music became sadly obsolete, as tures, classical paintings on the ceilings and walls, series of Great Performances., and he adapted new forms were being explored. He will always be Roman pillar architecture framing the prosceni- and directed three stories by Zora Neale Hurston revered, however, and will hold the tide of the um, and the house decked with carvings of drap- and for this, won the Obie Award. king of jazz. He died in 1941 in Los Angeles. IP WA ing ribbon and fruit cherubs and classical come- The man who played the lead as the part of His life was amazing and full of follies and tri- PSATTOA2 dy/tragedy masks. Gold-plated sculptures the mature Jelly Roll Morton, was Maurice Hines. als for which he was haunted throughout his life. presided on either side of the proscenium arch He has a long list of credits, including Guys and This is, or seemed to be, the main focus of the cashier, stocker depicting three people—one holding a torch, Dolls, Uptown... it's Hot!, Satchmo, the motion- musical. He became big, and people loved him. Mon. • Sat. all shifts available!! another holding a mask, and another in the mid- picture production of The Cotton Club, and he is He was known around the world. However, even Apply In person dle and placed above the other two, holding a currently working on directing and choreograph- the mightiest people find their way into worm Big Top Liquor torch. I have yet to analyze exactly what the whole ing the extravaganza musical The Soulful Messiah, holes where the only way out is forward, and to 1574 University Ave. of the sculpture means for the theatre, but I know to be broadcast globally from the Holy Land to be get forward, you'll just have to chow some dirt. He that it is something Move to find out a part of the Jerusalem 3000 Celebration. chowed like nothin'—but he never got out of the So here's me, Mr. Skeptical, acting like a lit- Another big name is Savion Glover who has worm hole. In the musical, the Chimney Man Friday December 16, 1994 Page 8

Var‘e

Concordia Catches the Spirit of Christmas Project Shoebox by Heather Gifford also provides weekly Wednesday Advent services Underway at CSP and daily chapel services. Also, since it is often Those of us who live away from our homes better to give than receive, one can participate in News Release and families tend to feel the loneliest around Concordia's Shoebox Project, donating personal If you feel that the old cliche' "lis better to Christmas time Although most college students items to be given to the economically deprived. give than to receive" rings true, this is an oppor- do get home fcc the holklay itsdf, we still miss the All of these things heighten the family tunity for you. Project Shoebox is a service that entire advent season of preparation. However, atmosphere here at Concordia, which helps to attempts to collect necessary personal items to be after taking a look around our campus, I have promote the Christmas spirit as well. I hope that put into shoeboxes and wrapped like gifts for the seen that the Concordia community does a good all students will take advantage of these opportu- elderly, homeless, and otherwise economically job of trying to provide many opportunities to nities in the few remaining days before break. disadvantaged. Many of these people cannot "catch the Christmas Spirit" Perhaps we should all take time to attend a service afford to purchase such items for themselves, as Anyone who walks through or past any of in the beautifully decorated chapel, or donate to a the cost of living in Minnesota is high. the on campus housing will see masses of lights worthy cause. With the help of our own college If you wish to make the life of someone a lit- and decorations adorning the windows and doors. community, and a "Christmas with Christ" as our de brighter or if you just enjoy giving, please leave Also, nearly every floor of the dormitories has In addition to decorations in donna, there focus, we will enhance both the time spent here any donations on Tier One of the Student Union planned some sort of gathering to celebrate the are the several Christmas and Advent programs with friends and at home with family all the more. at the designated table. If you have any questions, birth of our Lord, some going as far as planning taking place on our campus. Not only are the var- please either consult the orange/red flyers in the open houses for all of the Concordia community. ious music programs occurring, but the chapel dining hall or call Chris Conner at X368. The ILK of Newt What Newt really said was that he needs to con- ing our children pray to fix what's wrong in this think this will solve? Who are these people tinue the status quo, get government off of the country. And the bottom line isn't that Newt and Speaking of jerks, here is a recipe for jerked backs of a few select industries, (defined by the his ilk (doesn't that just sing, Newt and his ilk) will chicken wings. level of their campaigning contributions), increase need to make the tough decisions and do what 12 Chicken Wings his own personal power, get himself on the news needs to be done. If that was all that was needed, 1 Medium Onion almost daily, and allow himself just to tear up it would have happened. What it is going to take 1/2 C Chopped Scallions those pesky speeding tickets. is for each of us to make the tough decisions and 1 'Ibs Fresh Ground Ginger Let's take a look at what school prayer would do what needs to be done. 1/4 C Cider Vinegar actually be like. The first thing we need to do is Paying a realistic price for a gallon of gas is a la C Soy Sauce establish just exactly what the prayer will be. Will good example. If we paid what it really costs, the 1\2 C Olive Oil it be the Lord's Prayer? Will it be a Christian roads would be in better condition, we would get 2 Jalapenos prayer? better mileage, the environment would improve, 2 Tsp Sugar by Russ VanWagner I saw a guy on Ted Roppple who said that airlines would be safer, and there would never be 1 Ms Jerk Seasoning the local community will resolve the contents of another traffic jam anywhere. But if Newt and his la Tsp Ground Cinnamon What is the deal with this school prayer stuff? the prayer. I also saw Pat Robertson say that of ilk were to try to make us do that, there would be la Tsp Ground Allspice Who are these people, and where do they come course, the prayer will be a Christian prayer. By his a revolution. On the other hand, we could afford Tsp Ground Nutmeg from? I think that Newt needs to read the logic this would be the only kind of prayer that to build longer lasting roads, and keep them in a 1/4 C Honey Constitution before he tries to ammend it. (A would work, since God is a Christian. So sorry to decent working condition. The airports could 1/4 C Lemon juice funny side bar here, during the hearings that all those Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, Lakotans, and afford the latest and best equipment and the peo- Cut off the wing tips and discard. Separate Tipper Gore held several years ago to put warning (dare I say it?) Satan worshipers. Apparently, in ple to use it. But as it is now, the government and cut the rest in half at the joint. labels on records that may be deemed as offen- this country at least, you are free to worship the can't afford to build roads at all, so they make do Combine the next 13 ingredients, except the sive: Frank Zappa showed up to argue against the little "g" god of your choice, but it has been decid- by building lousy ones. Right now a majority of TV 1/4 C of the soy sauce, in a food processor until a labels. In his opening statements, he held up a ed that if you want to talk to the big "G" God, then stations have more sophisticated radar to give you smooth paste is loaned. copy of the Constitution and said "I brought this you have to become a Christian. I can just imagine that nifty "color weather" than airports have to Take 1/2 C of this paste and mix with the along, just as a reference." Too bad he is dead all of those poor school administrators, sweating give those really nifty "safe landings." honey, lemon juice and the rest of the soy sauce now. He would have made a great President) over the prayer, not wanting to offend anyone. It Newt and his ilk have a certain amount of to create the marinade. You may store the remain- I get the feeling that this whole school will probably end up something like this ..."God, responsibility. But the first function of power is to ing paste in the fridge for up to 1 month. Divide prayer issue is what is called in the world of con please don't let anyone get so upset over this do whatever it takes to keep it. There is no way the marinade in half. Use the first half to marinate men, a "bait and switch." I don't think that Newt prayer that they will actually show up at a school that the voters would let Newt and his ilk stay in immediately and save the other half for later use. cares about school prayer any more than George board meeting and have me fired, and please power if all of the sudden we were paying three to Marinate overnight. Drain the chicken and discard Bush cared about the Pledge of Allegiance. It's all Heavenly Father, make those ACT scores go up so four dollars for a gallon of gas, or $7.48 (the real the marinade. Preheat the oven at 375 degrees about snowing the American public. Newt says that folks will allow me and the rest of the staff a total cost according to the GAO...this includes and bake the wings on a sheet pan for 30 minutes that what we need to cure the ills of too much vio- small raise next year. And please, if it is your will, the costs the government takes on for subsidies or until well browned. Remove from the oven and lence, deadbeat dads, government waste, execu- don't let any homosexual, Nazi, anti-fur, or pro- and health costs) for a pack of smokes. Well let me refrigerate for at least 2 hours, but for as long as 5 tive corruption, foreign competition, and the ever choice groups demand that they be able to buy ad tell you this, I smoke and I drive my car, and that's days. Preheat oven to 450 degrees. Coat the wings growing budget deficit is one minute of prayer space in the school paper or that they demand a lot of money. But I truly believe that if that is with the remainder of the marinade and bake on each school day. And a resounding majority of having a float in the homecoming parade. Amen" what it costs, then that is what I should pay. I a sheet pan for 5 minutes. Serve with celery sticks Americans last November said, "Yeah man, that's Nope, it's not going to be that simple. It's think of it as the price of reality. and house dressing. all we need." Well friends, here is the real deal. going to take more than casting a vote and mak- School prayer. What do Newt and his ilk Eat early, Eat often goomIES b'. clitis 'Ronk 641special

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Friday December 16, 1994 SPORTS Page 10 Concordia's Women, of Comet Hoopsters Battle Expectations En Route to a 5-3 Start

Winter Gaining Recognition by Jason Wolter time and quiddy cut the margin to single digits. By playing tough on the defensive end, the good competition to fill the starters' shoes. The Not many basketball coaches would com- Comets were able to take a small lead with a cou- bench is, in fact, very talented and the rung plain about being 5-3, when they have as tough a ple minutes left in the game. Then apparently the women are in a never-ending rally to prove them- schedule as the Comets (except maybe Bobby referees had seen enough of this upset, or maybe selves. The proof comes in the fact that there has Knight), but men's basketball coach Dennis they were fed up with the verbal barrage they been a different starting line up for each of the Getzlaff is feeling that way for a reason. He has a received from the loud contingency of Concordia first seven games. team with unlimited potential and great talent. fans who made the trip. The refs made some bad With the loss of many players from last year's In addition to his own high expectations, the calls. Their help allowed the Oles to shoot enough team comes several drawbacks. The loss of Angie. Concordia community expects his team to win free throws to take a three-point lead with 16 sec- Jacox has opened the door for a team leader to every game. For a team to do that, it must play onds left. '""•.•..•• step up and accept the role of spearheading the consistently great basketball. That, according to Prentiss Perkins, who was having little suc- team. This has yet to happen as the women search Getzlaff, is the problem. cess from behind the three-point line, brought the for their place and security on a rung team. With all the talent this team has, they still ball up the court With about 4 seconds to play, he There are leaders on the team, but they need a have yet to bring it all together as one cohesive "stepped to the front of the line," as one assistant single, more vocal leader. unit for forty minutes. It was easy last year for the coach put it. He jumped, rising over the out- Coach Tills has high expectations for her team to gel, because no one expected them to be stretched arms of two Ole defenders, and let it fly. team this year. She looks forward to seeing her successful. The "us-against-the-world" mantra The shot arched over his hopeful teammates and freshman mature and become collegiate players helps to psychologically unite a team. worried opponents. SWISH! Nothing but the bot- of the highest caliber. But when a team has three guys starting who tom of the net! Senior Leadership--Prochnow The 3.6 record is deceptive in that it is com- did not start last year, as well as three impact play- The game went into overtime, and Perkins "Rejects" Macalaster posed of 7 non conference games. The Comets ers who transferred in this year, it is hard to get stayed hot, hitting two three-pointers to seal the are 2-0 in the UMAC. Coach Tills believes in sched- them all on the same page. Warns Getzlaff, "I feel victory, 65-62. by Pat Marsh uling difficult, non conference games to bring her sorry for our opponents once we begin to play Coming up for the Comets is perhaps their players up to a higher level. In the conference consistently." biggest game of the year, a match-up with St A much overlooked sport at Concordia is Coach Tills sees her team finishing at the first or Perhaps the Comets are beginning to gel Thomas. The Tommies were ranked 8 in the women's basketball. It does not receive the hype second position, and they are well on their way together. Among the five victories are two to St. nation for NCAA Division 111 basketball by Sports and glam that men's basketball traditionally with two conference victories. Mary's and St. Olaf. Both schools are larger in size Illustrated. The game is at St Thomas on receives. This is not because of a lack of intensity The records are not what Coach Tills cares and are members of the MIAC They have one Saturday, December 17, at 7:30. or excitement by the players, but a lack of aware- about though. Of course she loves to win but as other thing in common: little CSP traveled to their With the Timberwolves struggling and the ness on the fans' part. The Concordia women's she puts it, "I want them (the team) to play and court and beat them. Gophers scheduling non-conference cream puffs, basketball program is a respectable force led by have fun." It is wonderful to see a coach that In the St. Olaf game, the Comets trailed by as this could be one of the best games you'll have a the impeccable caching of Tammie Tills. stresses the game and not the record. So if you're many as 16 points in the first half. And, for the sec- chance to see this year...anywhere in Minnesota! This season is a season dimming as four of ready to cheer on the home team and watch a dis- ond straight year, the Comets came out after half-alf See ya' there! the five starters are freshman. This is not a curse, play of great basketball, come on down to the however, because they are very talented and Gangelhoff Center and cheer our women on. improve with every game. It also allows fora lot of Dreaming of making a Concordia Jumps difference in the world? the UMAC Ship by Jodi Riggert isn't as high as al, would prefer. Many options result with Concordia becoming Concordia College-StPaul is completing its independent, but no immediate or specific plans last year as a member of the Upper Midwest have been made. CSP could become an NCAA III Athletic Conference, and athletic director and school, a step above the present NAIA II member- men's head basketball coach Dennis Getzlaff has ship. The down side to that, though, is the diffi- submitted a notice that CSP will become indepen- culty of qualifying for post-season tournament dent in the fall of 1995. The more to an indepen- action as an independent NCAA III team. There dent program will affect all of the athletic pro- has been some discussion on forming a new con- grams at CSP except for the men's soccer team ference with such schools as Northwestern, and the football team. Northland, University of Wisconsin Superior, Several reasons support Concordia's decision Mount Senario, Viterbo, and a few others. No final Consider a career to withdraw from the conference. Currently, the decisions have been made as plans remain up in conference holds a somewhat lower academic and the air. in ministry. athletic reputation than what CSP would like to be As an independent athletic college, Concordia associated with. Also, the eligibility standards of may face a more competitive schedule and longer the conference are below what Concordia would travels to game sites, but sports directors consid- Contact Bethel Seminary to learn more about the like to subscribe to. Fmk, the caliber of wom- er such changes to be a necessary and positive variety of options you have with a master's degree in en's athletics in the Upper Midwest Conference one. 9 divinity, Christian education, or theological studies.

- ; g-1,62y1 MNIMM•11111 1111111•1■1111•1 Bethel Theological Seminary Fuel (Summar), • FUELS - Gasoano Dian& 100 Oct. Radng St. Paul • San Diego Korossno (Maisr), • LURE - 10 NUn. ONChang:211= Mahan/not/ 612-638-6288 • 800-255-8706 •CAR WASH - in-Tech Self Service With Options Dairy Moro. 011 C1111.1'2 • GROCERY- Snoda, Pop, • • FOOD - Del Baker* Bolued), Soups, Souldwidurs (Not cowl PREPARE FOR THE MINISTRY OF YOUR LIFE "CUSTOMER MINDED" Page 11 SPORTS Friday December 16, 1994

Football, Volleyball Seasons Come to an End by Jason Wolter next year—every player on the team should be Has the NBA Lost It? back next year, as there were no seniors this sea- of rodr-n-roll basketball to the NBA's hard- The volleyball and football seasons have son. wood. Unfortunately, the Shags and the ended. While the volleyball team had a very suc- Pennys and the Big Dogs have brought cessful season, the football season was disap- The Comet football team took their lumps with them some extra baggage—enormous pointing. Both teams featured a mixture of youth this year. For starters, they did not live up to the egos. and experience, and both should look for better high expectations that were placed on them by Paychecks across the league have sky- things next year. head coach, Tom Cross. They had a good core of rocketed, but the game itself is lacking. The Lady Comets captured their fifth con- All-Conference seniors returning and a bumper Highly unproven, and undeserving, rook- secutive UMAC championship, going 11-1 in the crop of talented rookies and first-year players. But ies are making more dough than the stars conference. They also won 25 games, easily one of a lack of consistency on both offense and defense of even the most recent past. Glenn their most successful seasons. Their record led to a 3-7 record, 2-4 in the UMAC. Robinson asked for $100 million dollars for earned them a spot in the NAIA District playoffs, The Comets played NCAA Division III pow- his first ten years of NBA disservice. but because of a mix-up, they were seeded fifth in erhouse, Wartburg College (IA) and the NCAA Michael Jordan played nine NBA seasons, the sub-region. They showed that this seeding was Division I-AA Dayton Flyers. If Lis Vegas bothered but the greatest player of all time came indeed a mix-up by defeating Northern State to put out a betting line on these games, the bet nowhere near the $100 million mark in University at Aberdeen, South Dakota in four wouldn't have been about a score, but about the basketball salary. games. number of players riding home in an ambulance. Not only do these undeserving, whiny, trash Their next opponent was the number one The Comets played hard; however, they The NBA season is in full talking brats make large forums in such a short seed, Dordt College. Dordt defeated the Comets could not last against such talented teams, losing swing as we approach the holi- time, they insult any knowledgeable fans by play- in three games, but lost to Moorhead State in the to both by large margins. The Comets graduated day season. Fans are packing ing lazy, uninspired basketball. They're obviously district final. four All-Conference seniors, but they have a very into brand new, high-tech are- more worried about how they look than how they It was a great year for first-year coach, Liz talented group returning. nas in droves, and the league play. And winning isn't everything, in fact it's vir- Golnitz. She has a good reason to look forward to There's no reason to believe that this team can- continues to enjoy unwavering tually nothing! not compete for the conference title in 1995 A success. The NBA is hot as And the league encourages all of it! Ne-- ever...or is it? defensive rules don't allow players to make ani It's out-with-the-old, in- thing happen on that end of the court, and the s( with-the-new as powerhouse called stars shoot (not make) more free throw teams from the NBA's glory in thus slowing down a supposedly high-pace PdrkSqudre's 20thAnniver$ary $eason, the 80's (the Ulcers, Celtics, game. So where does a true fan of good basketix and Bulls) are being sifted away eri Special Offer on Student Subscriptions further from the top each year go to watch his or her beloved game? I sugge Only $8.00 per Show by teams with new talent like watching NCAA basketball. These players cal of e Join the fun! Order today !! the Orlando Magic. about winning and play hard enough to convinc Movies -Play A 5-Play A 6-Play Packages • $24 to $48 This new generation of fans that they care. But as for the NBA... its ove by Marc Connelly and NBA stars bring their own style fine. 9 George S. Kaufman

Show I: Opens January 12 ;, "Inventive and hilarious,."'' f.„ > main/ Yo,.. Times

by William Shakespeare Show 111: Opens March 2.3 "The best political play in the MON TEREY Engliskjanguage." INSTITUTE of INTERNATIONAL STUDIES by Harold Brighouse — Milton vi an Ev. ping Standard Show 1V: Opens April 21 SUMMER "A glowing, heartening evening." INTENSIVE — Francis Homer, Daily Express by vq'er. r yo,77.7,1 LANGUAGE * 1975 PROGRAM V: Opens Jane i PeOuctton contains nudity, %ant "One of the most powerfult and by Brandon Thomas JUNE 28 — AUGUST 24, 1995 French, German, Hungarian, Italian, Korean and Spanish prow at VC theatrical experience of our time Show VI: Opens July 6

JUNE 21 — AUGUST 17, 1995 — Edwin Wilt "Hilarious and completely diverting. English as a Second Language — Ned chaillet, Wail S'treet Journal SEND YOUR JUNE 21 — AUGUST 24, 1995 r SERIES (Check one) ORDER TODAY!! Name Arabic, Chinese, Japanese and Russian Complete this form and mail ID Deluxe (Shows 1-6) $48 it with a photo copy of your Address ❑ Classic (Shows 1-5) $40 current student ID or fee Apt/Box City State MONTEREY INSTITUTE OF INTERNATIONAL STUDIES 0 Sampler I ( Shows 1-3) $24 statement to: Zip Van Buren Street, Monterey, California 93940 Phone Sampler II (Shows 4-6) $24 425 Park Square Theatre ❑ FAX (408) 647-3534 Telephone (408) 647-4115 ■ Student Subscription No. of subscriptions x Price $ = Total Due $ DAY (Check one): S 408 St. Peter Street, Suite 110 THE GRADUATE SCHOOL FOR INTERNATIONAL CAREER PAYMENT: 0 Check or Money Order CI VISA ❑ Thursday 7:30 Saint Paul, MN 55102 0 MasterCard 0 Discover 0 American Express 0 Optima ❑ Friday 8:00 No Phone Orders Exp: Saturday 8:00 Tickets will be mailed in Acct No.: ❑ December Signature: 0 Sunday 2:00 L Friday December 16, 1994 Page 12

A Letter from Please, Bring the Crosses Back the President

From heaven above to earth I come We're not at the U of M Disturbed by absence of cross icons Offensive...or a confession of faith? To bring Good News to everyone! Glad tidings of great joy I bring I am writing in response to the letter in the The omission of the cross icons at the end of In a November 4 letter to the editors, a To all the world and gladly sing. last issue of The Sword that suggested that jig each article in the November 4 issue of Iheli2.di writer expressed: "The cross icons at the end of SEA is exclusive and separatist because of its disturbs me. I do not think the crosses symbolize each article in The Sword disturb me, for they To you this night is born a child use of the cross. This idea may have been valid if exclusivity, but rather affirm the foundation of convey separatism and exclusivity." One can Of Mary chosen virgin mild; we were all at the U ofM because they are not affil- which our institution is based. That foundation is assume that the editors of The Sword readily This newborn child of lowly birth iated with any specific religion. Therefore, they the death of Jesus, on the cross, and rising three agreed with this writer as witnessed by the fact Shall be the joy of all the earth. cannot use a symbol of any specific belief. days later for us sinners. that the cross icons were removed in the very Concordia, on the other hand, tells you they are a While some may not like it, this is a Lutheran same edition—before any other readers had a May the angelic proclamation in hymnic Christian college as soon as you walk through the institution. Are we Christians supposed to be chance to respond! poetry bring Good News to everyone in our door. In doing so this allows them to have chapel, good, quiet students, not rejoicing in the belief The key question is where does one draw Concordia College community. During these days offer religion chsses, and put crosses on their that we are saved by Christ's death and resurrec- the fine line between expressing "confession of of preparation for the celebration of Christmas, newspapers. tion? faith" and demonstrating sensitivity by not being "From heaven above" calls us to remember the This is not the paper's way of saying we are In regard to the community, is it wrong for "offensive"? divine Gift in our celebration. Christ, God's incar- exclusively Christian or that no one else is wel- Concordia to spread its faith as it reaches out to Throughout scripture we read about God's nate love, is the reason for Christmas. "Shall be come. The cross stands for Christianity and all its the community? Concordia's Academic Catalog love being so great that He desires a people to the joy of all the earth" reminds us of the impact beliefs, including the idea of reaching out to states on page 4, "The mission of Concordia share eternal paradise with Him. With that incred- of the Gift on our lives. God wants human beings everyone. If a person doesn't believe in College, a college of the Lutheran Church- ible thought in mind, one cannot help but want to to experience happiness. Myriad tragic reasons Christianity or the ideals it stands for, that's fine. Missouri Synod, is to prepare students for share that tremendous news as often as possible. threaten the existence of joy on the international, Just ignore the crosses. It's your right to ignore thoughtful and informed living, for dedicated ser- The Apostle Paul's laundry list of persecu- national, local personal levels. Yet may the eternal them as much as it's the right of The Sword to put vice to God and humanity, and for the enlight- tions is ample testimony of an individual who was purpose and power of Christmas bring down to them in there. If someone were to put together a ened care of God's creation, all within the contest willing to risk being "offensive" in order to express your life a joy filled Christmas faith. paper that offended no one, he would have noth- of the Christian Gospel." As Christian students of his "confession of faith." ing to write. Concordia, we should want to show the commu- If the cross icons are "offensive," then what Bob Hoist nity our faith. Also, does not the title, The Sword, are we to make of CSP's exclusively Christian Sincerely, come from Ephesians 6:17b? This verse states, chapel services and religion courses? "The Sword of the spirit, which is the word of Every incoming student to Concordia Kurt Klaus 9 God." receives a copy of the school catalog. Our Mission Please keep in mind that this is a Christian Statement dearly states that we are preparing stu- institution, and while there is no intent to be dents "all within the context of the Christian exclusive, do not be afraid to affirm and spread Gospel" the foundation of which Concordia is based upon. If evangelical Christianity is a "sensitivity problem" on Concordia's campus, how can we possibly ask Christian missionaries to risk "offend- A Vote for E-Mail s:Antone ing" diverse groups and cultures in foreign lands?! Finally, let me suggest that one of the most I would hire to express my opinions regard- greater. important reasons why non-Christian students ing Theresa Seto's article about E-mail at C.S.P. I keep reading The Sword about new pro- Editors' note: The absence of the cross icons choose to attend Concordia College is because (Nov.4). jects C.S.P. has discussed: new playing fields, new in the Nov. 4 issue of The Sword had nothing to they find faculty, staff, and students who demon- Last year, as a student at Concordia football bleachers, a new stadium. What about a do with the letter written to the editors. There strate uncommon love and concern for all mem- University in River Forest, IL, (C.U.R.F.) I had new computer system? While I love sports and were a number of complications during the pro- bers of the college community. Why? Because unlimited access to E-maiL I used the Internet sys- agree there is a need for better fields, what about duction of the Nov. 4 issue. When the editors these "servants of love are motivated by the tem to keep in contact with friends at Gustavus a better computer system which would have the were given the working draft of The Sword (with- Christian Gospel that goes far beyond the world's Adolphus College, U of M-Duluth, Concordia potential to benefit all of the Concordia commu- out the cross icons),we decided to forego the "golden rule" standard of conduct. College-Moorhead, Bethel College and Boston nity? Doesn't anyone else here feel cheated cross icons, rather than further hold-up the issue's I believe the cross icons to be acceptable University—just to name a few. In addition to because we &La have E-mail? publication. is symbols of God's love for all people 9 keeping in contact with friends at different I understand that some students do not schools, I used E-mail daily to send messages to know what E-mail is and do not care to use it, but friends at C.U.R.F. Last May, my friend Deb, to what about those of us who would like to use it whom I E-mailed everyday, printed out my many nQa? Don't we have a right to access something letters and gave them to me—they are now a that, if we were attending another school, we'd Dear Santa: priceless reminder of my many adventures there. already be logged on to? What about the minority How can I accurately describe the benefit of of students who already have E-mail because of How ya doing big guy? I'm doing well. have a surplus of Super Nintendo's, I'll take one of E-mail for college students? In addition to writing their on-campus jobs? I can understand that phas- How's the Mrs.? I hope you two are doing well up those, and a Donkey Kong Country game to go letters to friends, I was able to access information ing in campus-wide usage w.il be a long and diffi- there. How was your summer? Mine was great; I with it. I hope I'm not asking for much, but a partied pretty hard with my friends, as you proba- guy's got to have his necessities. Well, I'm sure through a system called GopherNet. In this sys- cult process but what about the idea of usage on bly know, but I'm still a good boy. I know I haven't you've got a bunch more letters to write and a tem I found out about local activities, events at a first-come, first-serve sip-up basis? (This way written to you in a long time, so I hope my name's huge list to check twice so I'd better go. I'll write other schools, and found the phone number of a the computer center does not have to have 1200 still on the list. Just in case you haven't checked, I again next year and I hope everything goes all long-lost friend at a school in New York. I did this student mailboxes ready...what about 10, 15, or graduated from high school and now am at right. Concordia College, but you knew that, huh? all on the computer—all within minutes. Thus, I 20% of that number?) I don't agree that students This Christmas will be a little different from the Merry Christmas, was very disappointed to learn that all C.S.P stu- should have to pay for the service—none of those ones in the past. I'm really not into Matchbox cars dents did not have E-maiL Knowing that I could accessing it now (through their jobs) have to, do or Transformers anymore (but I have kept all my Rob Delmont 9 quickly and easily keep in contact with new they? old ones). What I could really use is cash...for friends at Concordia College-Seward and St. I would like to thank nic.535,2rd for address- school Since I'm a commuter, I could also use some things for my car. Maybe a new set of snow John's University by simply going into a computer ing this issue. Dear St. Nicholas, tires or an air freshener? Or if you are really in a May everyone experience the joy of giv- lab, typing in my message and then hitting a key giving mood, you could just give me a new car or two and it would be sent, or that I could still Sincerely, altogether, a Viper or a Jaguar would be nice, you ing and receiving impulsive, secret gifts. access that Daily Bulletin at C.U.R.F., or find out can even choose the color, but I'd settle for a Thanks for your example. what the campus activities are at Notre Dame just Tanya laabs 9 Jeep. Just leave it in my driveway. You don't have Jean 9 to wrap it...well, maybe a big bow. as easily, has made my disappointment all the Other than those needs, I'm (MC But if you do