Namah Shivaya: Answers Within Oneself Written by: Jeffrey Kepler

In May of 2016, I vis- ited Rishikesh, India, with Colorado Moun- tain College, and had a life-changing spiritual experience after creating a portrait with a .

The chocolate- colored water rushed by the shore in proportions that could wipe out the largest human made structures. The river spanned over 400 feet in width, and enormous temples, shops, and residences bordered the banks of I could do was observe the beauty I looked over to see a man wearing the river. Despite the tremendous of this foreign culture. At times the orange clothes sitting on a rock. He volumes of water, the mellow grade camera can place a barrier between had a grey beard that reached to the of the landscape, and the lack of the photographer and the exter- middle of his chest and a mustache objects in the water, allowed the nal environment, and I wanted to that spread at least an inch past river to flow calmly through the remember this moment without the his cheeks if pulled out straight. city with few ripples visible on the lens. In the distance, I could hear Around his neck, he wore two surface. Groups of Indian tourists bells ringing, people chanting, and mala necklaces constructed of 108 were chanting after their exhila- horns honking. The concentration seeds. These mala neck- rating trip down the river in their of people was higher than I had laces are used so people can focus 16-foot inflatable rafts down the experienced in any large city in the on their , rather than count- river. An orange hue engulfed the United States or Western Europe. ing the number of times they repeat smoke-filled sky as the sun began The smell of incense, used to fend the chant. A person recites the to set over the horizon. Multi- off flies at fruit stands, mixed with mantra for every bead as they pass tudes of people congregated next the smell of manure from cattle that the beads through their fingers. to the river to wash their clothes, roam the streets to create an odor A pair of clogs sat on the ground, swim, pray, and send candles down so intense, it almost choked me next to the rock, and he perched the river as offerings to “Mother when I was riding the bus from the himself on a thin orange blanket for Ganga”. This location, next to the airport 16 days earlier. The humid- some padding. This man lay and Ganges River, served as an import- ity was near 100%, and the tem- observed everything around him ant religious site for everyone who perature was still in the high 90’s, with an intense gaze. visited. which felt nice after the 114 degree temperatures during the day. This I recognized this man as a Sadhu, I usually have my camera on hand environment felt much different which is a holy man in the Hindu to capture every moment possible, than my home state of Colorado. religion. These religious figures but I resisted capturing images. All give away all their belongings and and directed me to take another shot, so I moved back into position for another portrait. I set up for a shot, focused on his eyes through the camera, and squeezed the shutter button. I showed him the LCD screen again, and he nodded his head up and down in approval. I was so excited to have made a portrait with this religious man. Next, the man looked straight into my eyes with a piercing focus that would not allow my eyes to escape his. He said something to me I could not interpret. I looked at him, confused, and asked him to repeat the mantra again. After asking him two more times, I could feel his slight frustration with my lack of understanding. Instead of ask- ing him again, I found a group of Indian teenagers that I hoped could help me understand what the man was saying. devote their entire life to mediation on the rock the man was sitting on. I asked one of the boys, “Can you and . They rely on donations The boys then jumped into the wa- tell me what the man is saying?” so they can pursue their lifelong ter to swim and splash each other. commitment to this lifestyle. Often, I could not believe the disrespect. He said, “Yes. He is saying the these men embark on pilgrimages The Sadhu was aware of what the photograph is good. He is telling across India to visit temples and to boys were doing, but he did not act you an old Hindu mantra ‘Om pray. Throughout the trip, I wanted on this and continued to live in his Namah Shivaya’”. to capture a photo of one of these meditative state. men, but I felt rude trying this I replied to the boy, “Thank you without permission. About fifteen minutes later, I gath- very much!” ered enough courage to approach I continued to observe the scenery the man to ask if I could make a The man said something to the boy around me, and I would occasion- portrait with him. Unfortunately, I and the boy asked me, “How much ally make eye contact with the had spent all my rupees and only did your camera cost? The man Sadhu on the rock. It almost felt as had two Lara Bars and a Cliff Bar. I wants to know.” if he was focusing on me more than offered him the snacks in exchange others around him. We exchanged for a portrait. He reluctantly ac- I looked at the camera and thought glances a few times then he lay cepted the offer and allowed me about its value. The lens and body down on the rock. After a few to capture an image of him. He at retail value add up to $3,000 minutes four teenage Indian boys motioned to me to show him the USD, which would be 198,000 ru- walked next to the Sadhu and stood LCD of my screen, and I allowed pees. I quickly made up a number behind him. They began motioning him to assess the portrait. His hand and told him, “It cost about 70,000 obscene gestures to this man, then reached up to his mustache, as he rupees.” they tore off their clothes down to began to straighten out his facial their underwear and threw them hair. The Sadhu pointed behind me He responded, “Wow that is a lot of money. You could buy many cars words continued to resonate with rial things in life like my camera with that.” Then he told the man me. Even though the Sadhu and I or expensive clothing. Improving how much the camera cost, and did not speak the same language, oneself leads to improving others, they spoke Hindi about how much he instilled his wisdom on a ran- which is especially important when the camera cost. dom western man with no religious trying to influence people to make beliefs. changes in their everyday behavior. Next, the boy asked me, “Can my The experience with this Sadhu friends and I take a ‘selfie’ with When I returned to the United will forever remind me that the you?” States, I researched the mantra best way to alter the outside world I told him, “One minute, I want to “Om Namah Shivaya.” I discov- is to change ourselves internally. thank this man.” ered the saying translates to “I bow Even though I do not believe in I turned to the Sadhu to thank him to !”, and Shiva is considered organized religion, the experience again. He looked at me again and the inner self or god. This can with this Sadhu encouraged me repeated “Om Namah Shivaya!”, also be translated to “I honor the to reconsider my spiritual beliefs, while keeping direct eye contact divinity within myself”. I am not and I will continue to search within with me. a religious person, but I do feel myself for these answers. we are all connected as humans. I I told him, “Thank you! Namaste!”, took his wisdom to tell me to focus and I made a prayer motion with on myself rather than the mate- my hands.

I then walked away and took a couple of selfies with the teenage boys. They asked me why I was in India, and I told them I was on a study abroad trip with Colorado Mountain College in the United States. They were impressed that a group of us traveled to Rishikesh to observe their culture. I asked the boy that translated for me, “What do you think of the United States?”

He replied, “I like Obama! He seems like a great president and he wants to take care of his people.”

Unexpectedly, the intern of our trip, Adrienne, shouted, “Hey Jeff! It is getting dark! We have to go.”

I reluctantly agreed, told the boys I was leaving, and returned with the group to the hotel. The entire time I had been conversing with the teenagers, the Sadhu had kept eye contact with me. I could hear his mantra without him saying a word. At the time, I did not know what the mantra meant, but his