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1 Ale, Glorious Ale (trad.) `Alf a Pint of Ale (Gus Elen) 1. For breakfast I likes a little bit of toast, Now when I were a young man my father did say And `alf a pint of ale. Summer`s a coming it’s time to make hay And for dinner I likes a little bit of meat, Now when hays been carted don’t you ever fail And `alf a pint of ale. To drink gaffer`s health in a pint of good ale. Now for tea I likes a little bit o` fish, And `alf a pint of ale. Ch. But for supper I likes a crust of bread and cheese, Ale, ale, glorious ale And a gallon and a half of ale. Served up in pewter it tells it’s own tale Some folks likes radishes some curly kale All Around My Hat (trad.) But give I boiled parsnips and a gurt dish of taters And a lump of fatty bacon and a pint of good ale. Chorus All around my hat, I will wear the green willow, And all around my hat, for a twelve-month and a day. 2. Now take those teetotallers they drinks water neat. And if anyone should ask me the reason why I'm wearin' it, It's all for my true love who's far, far, away It must rot their gutsies and give ‘em damp feet. Now I always say that a man can’t grow stale On boiled beef and bacon and a pint of good ale. Fare thee well cold winter, and fare thee well cold frost. For nothing I have gained, but my own true love have lost. So sing and I'll be merry, when occasion I do see- 3. She's a false deluded lover, let her go, fare well she. Our MP’s in Parliament our faith for to keep I hope now we’ve put him there he won’t sit and sleep. He’ll always get my vote if he never fail The other day I brought her a fine golden ring: I asked her to marry, but oh what an awful thing. To bring down the price of our good English Ale. I thought that she loved me, 'til she began to laugh She showed me the door and threw out my hat. Take a quarter pound of reason, and a half pound of sense A small sprig of time, and a pinch of prudence, All For Me Grog (trad.) Now mix then all together and you and you will plainly see: She's a false deluded lover, let her go, fare well she. Ch. All for me grog me jolly, jolly grog All for me beer and tobacco Just for fun: sing 3 lines of chorus then new 4th line For I spent all me tin on the lassies drinking gin "It`s my bloody willow and my bloody hat!" or..... And across the western oceans I must wander. All around my flat I will wear the green wellies..... (Carrot) V1. Now where are me boots me noggin’ noggin’ boots All For Maggy`s Party (Scot.Lab.Conf 1981 + 4th ed All gone for beer and tobacco tune: Marie`s Wedding) The heels they are worn out and the soles are knocked about Blue rosettes and blue rinsed hair, And the toes are looking out for better weather. Tory ladies everywhere, Arm in arm and debonair, V2. All for Maggie's Party. Now where is my shirt me noggin’ noggin’ shirt All gone for beer and tobacco Chorus: The collar is worn out & the front is knocked about Tory ladies, on we go, And the tail is looking out for better weather. Where we're going we don't know; But we'll make a damn fine show, V3. All for Maggie's Party. Now where is me hat me noggin’ noggin’ hat All gone for beer and tobacco Summer fetes were not in vain, The brim is all turned down there’s a hole up in the Selling knick-knacks in the rain, crown Tupperware is quite the game, And me hair is looking out for better weather. All for Maggie's Party. V4 Help support our new MP, I’m sick in me head for I haven’t been to bed Make him scones and Typhoo tea; Since first I came ashore with me plunder That's the place for you and me - I see centipedes and snakes and I’m full of pains Here in Maggie's Party. and aches So I better make a push out over yonder These old dears they still do roam In your local nursing home Rummaging with fine tooth comb All for Maggy`s Party. 2 All Things Dull and Ugly (lyrics by Eric Idle Always Look on the Bright Side of Life (Eric Idle) tune: All Things Bright and Beautiful) All things dull and ugly, All creatures short and squat, All things rude and `orrible,, Always look on the bright side of life...whistle Always look on the bright side of life...whistle The Lord God made the lot. Each little snake that poisons, Some things in life are bad Each little wasp that stings, They can really make you mad He made their brutish venom, Other things just make you swear and curse. He made their nasty wings. When you're chewing on life's gristle Don't grumble, give a whistle All things sick and cancerous, And this'll help things turn out for the best... All gross things great and small, All things foul and dangerous, And...always look on the bright side of life...whistle The Lord God made them all. Always look on the light side of life... whistle Each viscious little hornet, Each beastly little squid-- If life seems jolly rotten Who made the spikey urchin? There's something you've forgotten Who made the sharks? He did! And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing. When you're feeling in the dumps All things scabbed and ulcerous, Don't be silly chumps All pox both great and small, Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing. All things foul and gangrenous, The Lord God made them all And...always look on the bright side of life... whistle Always look on the light side of life... whistle For life is quite absurd And death's the final word Annie Laurie (trad.) You must always face the curtain with a bow. Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin Maxwelton's braes are bonnie Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow. Where early fa's the dew And 'twas there that Annie Laurie So always look on the bright side of death Gave me her promise true. Just before you draw your terminal breath Gave me her promise true Which ne'er forgot will be And for bonnie Annie Laurie Life's a piece of s*** I'd lay me doon and dee. When you look at it Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true. You'll see it's all a show Her brow is like the snowdrift Keep 'em laughing as you go Her throat is like the swan Just remember that the last laugh is on you. Her face it is the fairest That e'er the sun shone on. That e'er the sun shone on And always look on the bright side of life... And dark blue is her e'e Always look on the right side of life... And for bonnie Annie Laurie (Come on guys, cheer up!) I'd lay me doon and dee. Always look on the bright side of life... Always look on the bright side of life... (Worse things happen at sea, you know.) Like dew on th'gowan lying Always look on the bright side of life... Is th' fa' o' her fairy feet (I mean - what have you got to lose?) And like the winds in summer sighing (You know, you come from nothing - you're going Her voice is low and sweet. back to nothing. Her voice is low and sweet What have you lost? Nothing!) And she's a' the world to me Always look on the right side of life... And for bonnie Annie Laurie I'd lay me doon and dee. 3 Any Old Iron? (trad. as sung by Harry Champion) Arrest These Merry Gentlemen (Chris Sugden lyrics, tune: God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen) Just about a week or two ago my dear old Uncle Bill, 1. Arrest these merry gentlemen & take them all away. He went and kicked the bucket Arrest these merry gentlemen it may be Christmas Day. and he left me in his will. But they`re singing and they`re fighting So I went around the road And they`re causing an affray. to see my Auntie Jane. She said, "your Uncle Bill ch. So take tidings to Constable Joy has left you a watch and chain." Constable Joy So I put it on right across my derby kell. So take tidings to Constable Joy. The sun was shining on it and it made me look a swell. 2. It was a silent night before some rough unruly lout. I went out, strolling round about. Began to pick an argument and loudly he did shout. A crowd of kiddies followed me Now I think I see some and they began to shout, Christmas boxing breaking out. "Any old iron? Any old iron? 3.
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