Women In The Jewish Commu~ity. Review and Recommendations Rosalind Preston o.a.E. Copyright © Office of the Chief Rabbi 1994 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior permission of the publishers Women in the Community. First published in 1994 in Great Britain by Women in the Community Adler House Tavistock Square London WC1H 9HN Second Impression 8/94 : ISBN 0-9523543-1-4 Design and Layout by Marriott Design and Productions, London NW4 Printed in Great Britain by The Book Factory, London N7 Table of Contents Table of Contents Foreword Methodology I: Collecting the Material V Methodology 11: Writing the Report IX Members of the Working Party XI Recommendations and Findings R1 Chapter 1: The Early Years 1 Chapter 2: Stepping Out 19 Chapter 3: Spiritual Needs: The Orthodox Perspective 29 Chapter 4: Family Matters 43 Chapter 5: Divorce: Women's Experiences 59 Chapter 6: A Caring Community 67 Executive Summary: Get and Agunah Working Party Report to the Chief Rabbi 77 Executive Summary: Survey Report 101 Recent Initiatives 111 Glossary 115 Index for Cross References 121 Foreword Foreword The announcement of the "Women in the Community" project, initiated by Chief Rabbi, Dr. Jonathan Sacks, provoked a variety of responses - surprise that his first major initiative on taking office was to focus on the concerns of women; scepticism that this would be yet another exercise in futility; approval that the invitation extended to Jewish women of all affiliations and, above all, hope that the vital issues concerning women and Halachah would be addressed anew. Would the Review carry forward and build on the prodigious endeavours and wide ranging consultations undertaken by many outstanding British Jewish women during previous decades? As a result of the long process of investigation, exploration, discussion and debate, the agenda of women's concerns has indeed been brought to the forefront of community consciousness. Individual women have responded in their thousands, seizing this unique opportunity to explore their own hopes and expectations, concerns and fears, not just for themselves, their immediate families and their local communities, but also out of a strong desire to safeguard and strengthen the wellbeing of Jewish life in this country - to guarantee Jewish continuity. Nevertheless, it is quite clear that a very large number of women did not take up the invitation to participate. Was it disinterest, complacency, satisfaction with the status quo or a lack of awareness? I cannot be sure since there is no way to measure or compare the level of response with any previous similar exercise. I quickly discovered that, prior to the beginning of the project, no data whatsoever existed on Jewish women in the U.K. It became obvious therefore that the work of the Review could not be completed without addressing that issue. Consequently, in 1993, the Community Research Unit of the Board of Deputies of British Jews was commissioned to design a questionnaire based on the wide range of subjects already raised by women at their meetings. The results of this penetrating and comprehensive document are contained in the "Women in the Jewish Community- Survey Report". I am especially grateful to Marlena Schmool, Director of the CSU and Dr. Stephen Miller, Dean of the School of Social Women in The Jewish Community: Review and Recommendations Sciences at City University, together with their supporting staff, who undertook this pioneering project with such enthusiasm and single-mindedness. It must be pointed out that this unique piece of research was only made possible through the generous sponsorship of the Mina and Everard Goodman Foundation which I acknowledge with sincere appreciation and grateful thanks. The "Women in the Community" Review has required immense dedication and motivation on the part of many people. It is also a supreme example of volunteerism and generosity of spirit. Throughout the months I have turned for advice, guidance, practical help and professional input to both longstanding and newly acquired colleagues, women leading very busy lives at work in the voluntary and professional sectors, inside and outside the Jewish community. Not once was I refused co-operation or assistance. I a·m also most grateful to their male counterparts working in the synagogues, Batei Din, welfare and advice agencies, research centres, national and local voluntary organisations and youth and student movements, who were willing to provide up-to-date information and practical assistance. This same support and co-operation has been enjoyed by the Regional teams. Their individual reports, of outstanding quality, will undoubtedly prove to be of major significance and relevance in the long term planning of community programmes around the country. Projects of this nature require not only time, energy and total commitment, but also finance. The Review is indebted to a small number of individual donors, men as well as women, who demonstrated their belief in the project by their generosity. Funding and administrative assistance was also sought, and gratefully received, from Jewish Representative Councils, Trusts and Foundations and, in one instance, a Regional Authority. Special thanks go to Mr. Clive Marks and the Ashdown Trust who provided me and my secretary, Thea Samuels, with an administrative base; a comfortable office and a warm welcome in his extremely busy premises in New Cavendish Street. Throughout the work of the Review there have been frequent discussions with Rabbis and members of Batei Din and I thank them all for their co-operation and interest. To Dr. Jeremy Phillips, personal thanks for his expert assistance on a number of technical details and to my own Rabbi, Dr. Jeffrey Cohen, for his caring support at all times. The working party is indebted to Dayan Ehrentreu, head of the London Beth Din, and halachic consultant to the Review, who permitted easy access to the Beth Din administration and met with working party members whenever requested. I thank Dayan Ehrentreu for his scholarly guidance on all halachic matters. Ever mindful of the Chief Rabbi's original instruction, that the process of the Review "had to be conducted in continuous partnership with halachic authorities to replace confrontation with true dialogue and mutual understanding", I am confident that we fulfilled that obligation. ii Foreword From the outset the working party has been spiritually sustained and supported by the Chief Rabbi, whose personal commitment has been a constant source of inspiration . .I am particularly indebted to him for allowing me total freedom of action though ever conscious of his watchful gaze! My feet have been kept on the straight and narrow by Jonathan Kestenbaum, Executive Director to the Chief Rabbi's Office. His administrative skills guaranteed the smooth running of the Review mechanism and, at our frequent meetings, his sound advice and good humour have helped me to overcome many hurdles. The writing of the report has not been easy. During the two years of the enquiry a massive amount of material was collected. Although coming fresh to the project writer Judy Goodkin, together with researcher Dr. Judith Citron, have produced a succinct resume of this dense mass, neither adding nor taking away, recording only the messages contained in the documentation. Occasionally the report draws on the results of the statistical survey. In this way we are able to highlight or contrast views expressed by women attending the meetings with the opinions of women who responded to the questionnaire. I am deeply grateful to Judy Goodkin andjudith Citron for the way in which they tackled this very difficult job. We have worked in close harmony with a clear understanding of our joint responsibilities - to· allow the voices of all those who partici pared in the Review to be recorded. Finally, I wish to express my feelings to the members of my working party. We have shared a most incredible experience; frequently difficult and always demanding, sometimes frustrating and often confusing. We have also shared personal joys and sorrows, the birth of babies, the Bar/Bat Mitzvot ·of children and grandchildren, beautiful weddings and painfully sad bereavements. Together, we have overcome setbacks and difficulties and finish, as we began, committed to each other and to the Jewish women in this country. This report is now handed to Chief Rabbi Dr. Jonathan Sacks for his consideration and in turn to the entire community - synagogal bodies, Representative Councils, voluntary and welfare organisations, educational centres and youth movements. "Do not withold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act". (Proverbs 3:2 7) Rosalind Preston O.B.E. Chairperson to the Review. iii Methodology I: Collecting the Material Methodology 1: Collecting the Material Aims and Objectives From its inception the aim of the Review was to reach out and embrace the concerns and opinions of Jewish women irrespective of their background. "I will be seeking the support and co-operation of all Jewish women, from all synagogue backgrounds and none, and of all ages, who are concerned about the welfare of our community". These were the words of Rosalind Preston, reported on the front page of the Jewish Chronicle in February, 1992 when the Women in the Community initiative was launched by Chief Rabbi Dr. Jonathan Sacks. Methodology I. Initial Steps Widespread national and local radio .and press publicity in newspapers, magazines, community and women's organisational newsletters was achieved throughout the timespan of the Review. In addition, women were invited to make their voices heard by responding to an explanatory pamphlet, of which 80,000 copies were distributed through Jewish community centres, synagogues, doctors' surgeries, health clinics, libraries, shops and school notice boards, in large and small communities alike, throughout Great Britain.