MAY 2009 CONTENTS
GSCENE magazine WILD FRUIT @ TRU www.gscene.com
PUBLISHED BY Peter Storrow TEL 01273 722457 EDITORIAL [email protected] ADS+ARTWORK [email protected]
EDITORIAL TEAM Jaq Bayles, Paul Disney, James Ledward, Richard Smith SUB-EDITOR Danielle Seitz ARTS EDITOR Michael Hootman DESIGN Michèle Allardyce
FRONT COVER PHOTOGRAPHY Dean Stockings www.deanstockings.co.uk MISS JASON’S BARMY BINGO @ R BAR www.myspace.com/dean_stockings www.biggerpixel.co.uk MODEL Stacy Martin THE PV OUT & ABOUT COVER PHOTOGRAPHY www.profilepics.co.uk NEWS & LISTINGS MODEL Jay Bowen 6 News 26 Listings & What’s On CONTRIBUTORS Jaq Bayles, Jo Bourne, Nick Boston, 45 Solent Listings Suchitra Chatterjee, Liam Clinton, Graham Hamilton, David Hodgson, REGULARS Nick Holloway, Jo Latham, Neil Masey, 24 Dance Music Enzo Marra, Netty, Bobby Newton, 24 DJ Profiles Eric Page, Marcus Patrick, Mark REVENGE Rennie, Del Sharp, Craig Hanlon- 48 Arts News Smith, Roger Tofts, Vron, Roger 51 Art Matters Wheeler, Mike Wall, Kate Wildblood, 52 Classical Notes Neil Woodcock, Rachael Woodgate 54 Choir Boys PHOTOGRAPHERS 54 Food Phil Bailey, Neal Ball, Michael 56 Film Hootman, Alf Le Flohic, James 57 Shopping Ledward, Billie Lewis, Sam Milford, 59 House & Homos Rachael Woodgate, 65 Jaq’s Monthly [email protected] for Sussex 66 Sharp Words Beacon cheque handover photo www.i380tv.com 67 Max Attitude 67 Student Campus © GSCENE 2009 68 Craig’s Thoughts All work appearing in Gscene Ltd is copyright. It is to be assumed that the copyright for 69 Dr Beale’s Surgery material rests with the magazine unless FEATURES 69 Pillow Talk otherwise stated on the page concerned. No part of this publication may be reproduced, 70 Dirty Fingers stored in an electronic or other retrieval 14 THE MARRYING KIND 70 Brand Watch system, transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, Richard Smith talks to journo-turned-author Paul Burston 71 Masey recording or otherwise without the prior 71 Gay Wisdom knowledge and consent of the publishers. The appearance of any person or any 16 BLOOM WITH A VIEW 72 Vron’s Voice organisation in Gscene is not to be construed Eric Page checks out Robert Hill-Snook’s Regency gardens 72 Airwaves as an implication of the sexual orientation or political persuasion of such persons or 73 Netty’s World organisations. 18 DREAMS AND FANTASIES 73 Queerying Queenie Richard Smith remembers what he wanted to be when he grew up 74 Suchi’s World 20 ONE NIGHT IN BANGKOK 74 Positive Thinking Graham Anderson spends an evening or two in the Thai capital 75 Twisted Gilded Ghetto 75 MindOut 22 AMAZING SUSSEX BY THE SEA 76 Wall’s Bit Roger Wheeler ambles along to Amberley in West Sussex 76 Community Safety 77 Letters to the Editor 50 DROPPING THE DRAG Five local drag queens go straight for the Actually choir INFORMATION 60 Classifieds 53 A SPOONFUL OF STEPHEN MEAR 64 Advertisers’ Map Paul Disney talks to Stephen Mear about famous friends and dancing 78 Services Directory LEGENDS www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton
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POLICE PATROLS TO COUNT ME IN TOO HATE CRIME & COMMUNITY BE INCREASED During the summer months, COMMUNITY EVENT Sussex Police are increasing GsceneSAFETY: Magazine is CAUSE calling for Sussex FOR Police and CONCERNBrighton & Hove City patrols in Kemp Town to help A HUGE SUCCESS Council to attend a public meeting to discuss the LGBT part of the city’s The hugely successful Count Me In Too prevent hate crime and will put Community Safety Strategy 2008–2011 and the quality of the consultation that research project hosted a stimulating and increased resources into LGBT informed the strategy. exciting community event at the Friends hatecrime investigations. Meeting House on April 1. The LGBT community is thought The move comes in the wake of a perceived breakdown in communications between LGBT people shared moving testimonies to be in excess of 35,000. That our LGBT community representatives and the Council’s Partnership Community about their personal, political and number swells during the Safety Team (PCST), resulting in Spectrum, the LGBT Community Forum (the professional lives. A project exhibition summer months as visitors organisation the community decided in January 2004 would be our consultative link highlighted the role that Brighton & Hove’s arrive. Although there has been a with the statutory authorities), taking a step backwards last year from working with LGBT community played in the city’s decrease in reported LGBT hate the PCST. development and crimes over recent years, Sussex presented Police say they are working hard The PCST is charged with producing effective initiatives to deal with hate crime in findings and to support victims who have the city and, along with Sussex Police, is signed up to the Community recommendations experienced Hate Crime, Engagement Framework. Last June, Spectrum said the authorities had failed to from the nine securing the prosecution of deliver effective consultation and were failing to deliver what they signed up to in reports that have offenders. Police say they will the Community Engagement Framework, adding: “Spectrum published 68 been published endeavour to thoroughly comments on the new strategy to reflect the strategic outcomes agreed to by to date. investigate all incidents reported stakeholders and to ensure community engagement is at the heart of all forward To make these in order to seek a successful plans. We do not seek a role as community watchdog. We do want to ensure that reports more prosecution. Not every person there are effective and inclusive mechanisms in place for LGBT people both to accessible, a who experiences a hate incident contribute to plans to tackle hate crime and to hold services to account for range of community summary sheets, wants or feels able to support a delivering them. While the PCST reviews its role (which Spectrum has been detailing key findings and issues, were prosecution. Every report informed by the PCST is happening), Spectrum is continuing to build on joint work launched at the event and are now received is important and can with Sussex Police.” available on the Count Me In Too website. make a difference. By knowing LGBT community groups, Police and Council came together in January 2004 and agreed that The community event was designed to Spectrum would facilitate LGBT safety work between the community, police and council about things that have happened, show what the project has done and also to the police are better able to target think about ways forward. Using the resourses to where they are discussions and feedback from this event, needed. Count Me In Too is now planning future Count Me In Too, research events and resources that will be led by published in 2007 revealed LGBT people. almost three quarters of If you would like to be a part of Count Me respondents had experienced In Too and guide its future, the first step is hate crime in the last 5 years to get in touch with Nick McGlynn on because of their sexual or gender 01273 641993 or email n.mcglynn@ identity. Only a quarter reported brighton.ac.uk, any of the hate crime incidents or Dr Kath they had experienced. Of those Gscene editor James Ledward believes there is currently an impasse and is Browne on 01273 who reported, 85% had reported concerned that trust and confidence levels, especially with regard to Sussex Police, 642377, email the incident as being related to
have been damaged by the present situation being allowed to continue. He says: DR KATH BROWNE k.a.browne@ their gender or sexualitities. “I view the present impasse so seriously I have decided to go on the record, brighton.ac.uk. When victims did report, they bringing up some uncomfortable historical home truths about the behaviour of both Become a part of mainly reported it to the Police police and council in the recent past on issues surrounding community safety in the the progressive (55%) or elsewhere (37%) rather city. I suggest a public meeting is called to resolve this situation. positive social than to the Community Safety change for LGBT “We need to establish how the LGBT community wants to resolve the present Team (7%) or through the True people in Brighton & Hove. impasse, and move matters on to re-establish an effective consultative mechanism Vision self reporting form (1%). The organisers would like to say thanks to to hold the police and council to account on community safety and hate-crime You can call the police for advice all those who helped make the event a issues. This clearly is not happening at the moment and is the root of all the about something that’s happened resounding success, including the staff of problems. It is not for the police or council to decide who they want to work with – to you. Even if you don’t want the the Friends Meeting House, the which has been happening, as they have attempted to sideline Spectrum – it is for police to take any action, your dedicated and friendly volunteers, those the community to meet, speak and decide. information helps them to work who shared their stories at the speakers’ “I suggest the meeting is hosted by Spectrum, the organisation at present charged with LGBT people and make the corner and the many LGBT people and by the LGBT community to do this work, and be independently facilitated. I also city safer. To report hate crime their allies from different Brighton & Hove suggest this process is fully funded from the BCU budget Sussex Police receive you can call 08456070999 or in communities and organisations that made from the government each year, earmarked for community engagement work. A an emergency 999. this event a special moment in the budget the police have handed over to the PCST, effectively denying Sussex Police For advice and support you can project’s history. the ability to work independently from the Council, with the LGBT community on contact Nick Antjoule on 01273 issues regarding hate crime and community safety issues were funding is needed” 665657 or PC Bobby Newton Visit www.countmeintoo.co.uk for copies on 01273 665541 or email of all reports and community summaries, A full in-depth report following an investigation by Gscene into the impasse can be [email protected] and look out for the revamped website. read on the Gscene website at www.gscene.com from May 1.
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STARBUCKS, IDAHOBIT EVENT AT ONE YEAR ON! A demonstration has been called THE KISS WALLBrighton STATUE is marking International Day Against by the organisers of the Stop
Homophobia, Biphobia and Transphobia Starbucks From Opening LOLA LASAGNE DULCIE DANGER (IDAHOBIT) next month with a seafront event. Campaign, on Saturday May 9 May 17 commemorates the day in 1990 when at noon outside Starbucks in St the World Health Organization removed James’s Street to mark the one- LOLA & DULCIE WALK homosexuality from its list of mental diseases. year anniversary of the first FOR STONEWALL In 86 countries globally, homosexual acts are demonstration. There’s still time to register for illegal, while in seven of those countries, Starbucks opened the branch of Stonewall’s Equality Walk on Bank lesbians, gay men, bisexuals and those who its coffee shop on St James’s Holiday Sunday, May 3. identify as trans are sometimes murdered simply Street in May 2008 without Enjoy a festive day out in Brighton with for their sexuality or gender identity. planning permission from the Amy Lamé, Brian Paddick, Mr Gay UK, The Brighton event is at the Kiss Wall statue near local council. More than 2,000 Lola Lasagne and Dulcie Danger, who the doughnut groyne at the end of East Street on people have joined the Facebook, will all be
KISS WALL BY BRUCE WILLIAMS Brighton seafront from 7.30pm. Stop Starbucks From Opening participating in the This year the theme of IDAHOBIT is End Transphobia: Respect Gender Identity group. MEP Caroline Lucas will walk on Stonewall’s This year’s event includes: be among the speakers. Free 20th anniversary. • A performance from Brighton Gay Men’s Chorus and the Rainbow Chorus cuppas and cakes available. This year Stonewall •A minute’s ‘noise’ in partnership with the B&H LGBT Workers’ Forum to is raising funds to remember the international victims of homo-, bi- and transphobic violence BOURNEOUT IN tackle the issue of • Speeches from local and national politicians homophobic •A ‘blossoming of kisses’, which will commemorate victims of violence and EASTBOURNE MR GAY UK bullying in schools. A new LGBT forum has been inspire confidence in a hopeful future, by making the Kiss Wall sculpture Registration starts at midday in the created to represent the blossom – attendees are encouraged to bring flowers and put them through the Pavilion Gardens. Bring along your Eastbourne LGBT community. holes in the statue. picnic, relax and enjoy the entertainment BourneOut has a range of aims, • Close with the release of visually stunning sky lanterns to represent the 86 before setting off on the walk at 2pm. which include monitoring countries that criminalise homosexuality. This year’s top fundraiser wins a luxury Eastbourne Council’s progress weekend for two in Paris including on equality issues, improving The City Council will officially recognise IDAHOBIT by flying the rainbow flag business-class travel on Eurostar, two equality for LGBT people in from Brighton and Hove town halls. Phelim Mac Cafferty of Brighton nights’ stay in a luxury hotel and £250 minority groups and working with IDAHOBIT said: “Forty years after the Stonewall riots, trans spending money! new and established groups in the people still face a mountain of prejudice and hatred. On May 17 Registration is just £10 (or free for area to improve LGBT services in this year, join us as we say ‘no’ to homophobia, biphobia and children under 12, accompanied by an Eastbourne. transphobia! But IDAHOBIT is about a lot more: it’s also about adult.) Walkers receive a goodie bag, a The forum will launch soon and publicly reaffirming our right to live without fear and hatred, special commemorative T-shirt and a glass more information can be found on which too often still plague the lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans of bubbly (or a soft drink for kids) once www.bourneout.org.uk or email PHELIM MACCAFFERTY communities.” they’ve crossed the finishing line at the [email protected]. Go to www.idaho.org.uk for more information. end-of-walk party at Legends. To register, visit: NATIONAL JEWISH www.equalitywalk.org.uk/register or REVENGE & R-BAR AWAYDAY email [email protected] Managers, staff, DJs and cleaners from R-Bar and Revenge were treated to an GROUP’S BRIGHTON or call the Equality Walk team on away day, team-building visit to Thorpe Park in Surrey by the owners of Revenge WEEKEND 020 7593 2294. last month. General manager Andrew Roberts said: “Everyone worked so hard The London based Jewish Gay over the Easter period and we wanted to say a huge thank-you to all the staff from and Lesbian Group will be both R-Bar and Revenge for their magnificent efforts.” 39 staff went on the trip. returning to Brighton for its third mid-summer event on the weekend of Friday June 19 – Sunday June 21.
All Jewish LGBT community, partners and children are welcome to attend the various events on offer. Member are £30, non- members £50 and day prices are available on request. For further information email: ALTERNATIVE DONATION [email protected] or telephone Matthew Bose from Emmerdale and Lady 07504 942724 James, co-chair of Brighton Pride, hand over a cheque to representatives from The For more information about the Sussex Beacon for £3,000 – the Jewish and Lesbian Group view: proceeds from the bucket collections at www.jglg.org.uk this year’s Alternative Panto.
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PEOPLE WITH HIV MARINE TAVERN STILL REFUSED Marine Tavern regular Barry Whitford ENTRY TO USA arrived back safely at the bar last month, to Terrence Higgins Trust (THT) is a rapturous reception from friends and warning that gay men living with supporters after completing his five-day HIV remain banned from fundraising bike ride to Paris and back in travelling to the USA unless they aid of The Sussex Beacon. have specifically applied for a visa to do so. Despite the recent introduction of an online visa waiver system (ESTA), people with HIV still need to attend an interview at the American Embassy in London before they can travel legally. THT’s telephone helpline, THT Direct, has recently received calls from people living with HIV who have tried to enter the country by using the online ESTA system, which is an electronic version of the visa waiver process. In some cases, these people have reached BARRY WHITFORD RETURNS FROM PARIS the US border only to be refused entry by immigration control and Barry made the ride solo with no back-up deported, incurring substantial cars or assistance. Most organised charity travel costs. rides to Paris ask for a minimum Currently, people with HIV are sponsorship of at least £1,200, from which BRIGHTON AIDS MEMORIAL permanently excluded from the accommodation and other costs are US except in exceptional deducted. Barry’s costs for this trip totalled circumstances. Following new about £250, which he paid himself, so TheNEARINGBrighton Aids Memorial COMPLETIONis one step nearer to being completed. Sculptor legislation last year, the HIV entry every penny of sponsorship money raised Romany Mark Bruce visited the Morris Singer Arts Foundry in Braintree, ban is no longer law, but remains will go directly to The Sussex Beacon. Essex, last month to inspect the sculpture prior to it being cast in bronze. A few an administrative decision to be Barry passed his target of £1,000, raising in last-minute alterations to the statue were necessary and casting will commence ruled on by the Department for excess of £1,800. He said: “I would like to within the next few weeks. Health and Human Services. thank Steve, Nat, Adrian, my partner and all Gscene magazine has donated a further £3,000 to the memorial fund from the THT continues to lobby for the my supporters at the Marine Tavern for all proceeds of the Golden Handbag Show and Revenge has donated £600, a complete lifting of the ban, which their help and support. My legs are sore and percentage of its bar take from the Golden Party, staged after the Golden Handbag it includes as a priority in its so is my bum.” Show in April. policy document 25 Things The Asked what was the worst moment of the Due to rising commodity prices, the cost of the memorial’s construction has Government Can Do. journey, Barry said: “When I arrived in escalated during the past 18 months. In June’s Gscene we will be announcing a People living with HIV who would Amiens the hotel I had booked had closed variety of fundraisers to help pay for the second stage of the project and giving like further information on their down. I tried three hotels, including the Ibis. Gift Aid details for people who want to make a donation online. right to travel internationally can They were all full. I was getting ready to Romany Mark Bruce will be holding an exhibition at the renowned Kemp Town contact THT Direct on 0845 sleep on a bench when I found a hotel at open house art space No Back Door during the Brighton Festival in May. The 1221 200, from 10am–10pm the fourth try.” exhibition will chart the progress of the Brighton & Hove Aids Memorial, from his weekdays, 12–6pm weekends, or You can still support Barry’s efforts; go to first drawings in the summer of 2007 to its final production at the foundry, with email [email protected]. www.justgiving.co.uk/barrywhitford. photographs and video footage. Lisa Power, head of policy at For more information about The Sussex Romany Mark says: “The Aids Memorial has received great support from across the THT, said: “While we’re pleased Beacon go to www.sussexbeacon.org.uk. community and this will be an opportunity to see how it has progressed from the that the US government intends to first drawings to the foundry.” revisit its entry regulations, it’s not The exhibition will be open each Saturday and Sunday in May from 11am–6pm happened yet. People with HIV at No Back Door, 30 George Street, Kemp Town. The Memorial’s progress can also shouldn’t assume it’s already OK be seen on Romany Mark’s blog via his to travel to the US without a website www.romanymarkbruce.com. special visa. Everyone entering the US is still required to state they Andrew Roberts, general manager at have no transmissible conditions, Revenge, hands over to Gscene editor and alongside not being a terrorist, a Golden Handbag organiser James Nazi or a criminal. People who Ledward, a cheque for £600, a percentage don’t get the special visa but then of the bar take from the Golden Party at disclose their status on entry risk Revenge after the Golden Handbag Show. being deported and banned from Nat from the Marine Tavern hands over The money will be given to the Aids entering the US again, so please a cheque from the sales of calendars, Memorial Project. check the rules before you fly.” £170, and Valentine cards, £42, totalling £212, to The Sussex Beacon.
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HIV STILL A KILLER WIN OPERA TICKETS TATCHELL HONOURED Ian Ross, Labour’s Win tickets to see brand-new productions of WITH BLUE PLAQUE parliamentary candidate for Aida, Turandot or Carmen at the Theatre Peter Tatchell, one of Britain’s best-known human- Worthing West, writes that Royal, Brighton. rights campaigners, has been awarded a blue plaque HIV is alive and well and still The three new productions are performed by by Southwark Council – an honour given to the killer that it always was. a large company and starring handpicked prominent individuals connected with the borough. “One of my favourite things international soloists alongside the full Phelim Mac Cafferty, on behalf of LGBTGreens, about being a parliamentary Chisinau National Philharmonic commented: “It’s only fitting that in the same borough candidate is receiving Orchestra and Chorus. where Peter fought the 1983 Bermondsey by-election, invitations to visit and meet with Aida is a story of war, jealousy and revenge, widely regarded as the dirtiest and most violent election charities across the local area. centred around the doomed love between campaign in Britain, a blue plaque will now denote At the beginning of April, I was the beautiful Ethiopian slave girl. Sung in where one of the world’s human-rights heroes lives. delighted to meet with the THT Italian with English Peter’s place in our history today is marked alongside to discuss HIV.” subtitles. other esteemed Southwark residents of times gone by, who HIV is the fastest growing Turandot is the include Charles Dickens, Charlie Chaplin, Oliver Goldsmith serious medical condition in story of a cold- and Isambard Kingdom Brunel. Congratulations Peter!” the UK, with an estimated hearted princess Caroline Lucas MEP, leader of the Green Party, 100,000 people expected to be who is surrounded CAROLINE LUCAS commented today: “We are immensely proud that Peter living with the virus by 2010. by suitors facing Tatchell is a national spokesperson for the Green Party, as According to the Health death if they fail to well as our parliamentary candidate in Oxford East. He Protection Agency, at least a answer her riddle quarter of people currently thoroughly deserves this award, and on behalf of the Green TURANDOT correctly, and the Party I’d like to give Peter our heartiest congratulations.” living with HIV have not yet one man who can melt the ice in her heart. Peter Tatchell, who received the award while he was in his been diagnosed. It is suggested Sung in Italian with English subtitles. native Australia, commented: “It’s a big honour. I’m very grateful to the people who that HIV transmissions in the Carmen is staged in a bullring for a new voted for me, especially since there were other notable, worthy and deserving UK may be from people who spectacular twist to Bizet’s famous and nominees. I hope my receipt of this award will encourage others to campaign for are undiagnosed and unaware seductive opera. Sung in French with human rights. I’ve lived in Southwark most of my life and I’m very proud to be part that they are carrying the virus: English subtitles. of its long illustrious history of distinguished authors, playwrights, scientists, around 3,500 transmissions First Prize A pair of tickets to see Aida on inventors and social reformers” every year. These are worrying Wednesday May 27, a set of traditional statistics. Egyptian papyrus bookmarks, a poster and a “I recently had the opportunity souvenir programme. to see the movie Milk – an Second Prize A pair of tickets to see inspiring real-life story about Turandot on Thursday May 28, a poster and the first openly gay man, a souvenir programme. Harvey Milk, to be elected to Runner-Up A pair of tickets to see Carmen public office in California. At on Friday May 29 and souvenir programme. the end of the movie it gave a To win, please send answers to the summary of what happened to following question on a postcard to: Opera Milk’s close allies over the Tickets, Gscene Magazine Ltd. 111 subsequent years. I was Western Road, Hove, BN3 1DD (please saddened to see how many include your telephone number). died of Aids during the 1980s Where and when was Verdi’s opera and 1990s. Despite the Aida first performed? worrying statistics above, I’m often alarmed by how many gay men think HIV no longer exists. PER COLUMN INCH A collection of HIV columns written by This couldn’t be any further Gay Times, HIV columnist Paul Thorn from the truth. A complete cure between December still does not exist and drugs 2004-December 2007. can only prolong life. And that is Paul has been positive why I am fully supportive of the since the late 80s and Terrence Higgins Trust’s calls personally experienced for improved health promotion, first hand the changing in addition to improved PSHE face of HIV to the present [personal, social and health day. Per Column Inch education] in schools. It is is a snapshot of living tragic for an individual’s life and with HIV in the ‘noughties’, post anti- aspirations to be destroyed for retroviral therapy and the new life, health the sake of one moment of and challenges that brings. Paul is giving a passion during unprotected sex. donation of £1 per copy sold to The It is imperative that awareness Sussex Beacon in Brighton. The book is of HIV is enhanced; it’s still available from the Sussex Beacon shop in alive and well, and still the killer St James’s Street, or to buy online from that it always was.” www.lulu.com/dontpanic price £7.99
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton SATURDAY 16TH MAY 8PM EUROVISION SONG CONTEST LIVE! PARTY NIGHT & GAVIN’S BIRTHDAY PARTY The QA hosts the Annual Eurovision Party with the contest "live" from Russia on the big screen. Hosted by SPICE who’ll be adding her comments throughout the evening. There’ll be flags, tears & laughter plus your chance to vote as you find out the QA’s favourite song of the night, then DJ KAMP KEVIN carries on the party till late!
BANK HOLIDAY MON 25TH MAY FOOD CABARET served DAILY until 4pm BENEFIT MONDAYS BANK HOLIDAY TUESDAYS & For THURSDAYS MON 4TH MAY BRIGHTON & HOVE'S STAR LGBT SWITCHBOARD SKINT!! Full CABARET SHOW 8PM till 11PM CABARET UNLIMITED DRINKS £10.99 with with KARAOKE hosted by with LOLA LASAGNE ROSE GARDEN SAM, BETTY & SPICE at 5.30PM followed by & guests from the BETTY’S KARAOKE SHOW cabaret circuit WEDNESDAYS ANYTHING GOES! with KAMP KEVIN SATURDAYS SUNDAYS KARAOKE! BINGO! QUIZ! CABARET CABARET FRIDAYS at 4PM at 5.30PM Brighton’s Original 2ND MAY CHRISSIE DU CANN 3RD MAY DAVINA SPARKLE CAMP ATTACK! 9TH MAY CHERRY POPPIN 10TH MAY TIFFANY WELLS DJ ANDY B returns with a fabulous 16TH MAY BETTY SWOLLOCKS 17TH MAY DRAG WITH NO NAME Friday Night Party at 9PM 23RD MAY MIS HAP 24TH MAY KITTY LITTER playing songs from Steps, Kylie, 30TH MAY QUINTION SMITH 31ST MAY SANDRA Madonna, S Club, Sugarbabes, Girls Aloud & all your favourites. Followed by Followed by Text Andy on 07946 792444 with your KAMP KEVIN’S NAKED KARAOKE PARTY BETTY’S KARAOKE SHOW requests + fantastic drinks deals!
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BRIGHTON FROCKS GAYCHOIR JUMBLE SALE Lovers of fashion can enjoy a weekend of catwalk shows, RAISES OVER £500 The Brighton Gay Men’s Chorus staged shopping and parties at the their annual jumble sale last month, at upcoming Brighton Fashion the Brighton Tavern in the North Laines, Weekend. Brighton Frocks raising £583 for the choirs funds. has organised the weekend to The Brighton Tavern, which is a popular celebrate the diverse and unique after rehearsal drinking venue for the choir, fashion that Brighton talent gives donated the venue free of charge for the to the industry, and it wants to establish Brighton as a style centre recognised around the world. The weekend begins with a catwalk show on Friday May 22 at the Hilton Metropole Hotel. The fashion show has been running since 2005, and last year it saw Karen Millen, TuckedRENAISSANCE away on the top floor above Fabric DESIGN Land on Western Road is dress designer directors from M&C Saatchi Kevin Freeman’s studio, Renaissance Design. It’s up here that he designs and and Zoe Ball sitting in the front creates his bespoke bridal gowns and evening wear. row. The walls are covered with calicos, photos and sketches of work in progress – and Event organiser Liz Bishop said: of course there are lots of rather fabulous frocks. I’m especially taken with a high- “The city-wide event will be a collared voluminous black number that reminds me of the Evil Queen in Snow chance for everyone involved to White. “It does look a bit like that, doesn’t it?” Kevin laughs. “That was actually a shine and show the rest of the wedding dress for someone who wanted to get married at Halloween.” UK and beyond what Brighton Spookily, it is Walt Disney who’s partly to blame for Kevin Freeman ending up has to offer in terms of style and fashion.” here. “When I was little I used to have a set of Disney books and I remember afternoon. Pictured is Jonathan Cave aka The weekend runs from Friday drawing medieval princesses with pointy hats on the fly covers of them,” he says. Mrs Bagot and Silvio Grasso aka Beryl May 22 to Sunday May 24. “I’ve always been interested in clothes and design who served up their special home made Fashion show tickets cost £13 and colours.” cakes and scones in the refreshment room (concessions also available) and Kevin was then living in the West Midlands, and of Milford Junction, from the film Brief the emporium event is free. For moved to London to study theatre design at Encounter, which was recreated in the side more information about the Wimbledon. “Which I hated! I was always more bar of the Brighton Tavern for the day. events and Brighton Frocks, go interested in the clothing sides of things.” He lived For more information about the Brighton to www.brightonfrocks.com in London for 20 years, where eventually he was Gay Men’s Chorus: www.cbgmc.org creating and designing costumes for some pretty big events held at Trafalgar Square and 02. He also GSCENE.COM had his own label, Diva. But people would see his The Gscene website has been TRANS COMEDY bespoke designs in style magazines and keep redesigned and now has a twice The first transgender comedienne to asking for copies to be made, which wasn’t what daily updated local news perform on the UK comedy circuit is he was into at all. It’s all about the one-off for service. coming to Brighton with her new show. Kevin. So four years ago he took a job as head of fashion at Hastings College You can download the complete Shelley Cooper, and moved down to Brighton with his partner Phil. He started Renaissance Design PDF of each months magazine who joined the UK in 2007. “A lot’s happened since I set it up. In the first year I was working in a one week before the printed comedy circuit in freezing-cold breezeblock garage in Henfield, which was odd. I moved to Western copies are availble in the bars. 2003, is bringing Road just over a year ago, and since then it’s been brilliant.” Join the Gscene Facebook her new stand-up You could currently be waiting six months if you want Kevin to make you a group and automatically get an show, Britishness, wedding dress. But what sort of person wants to get hitched in one of his email when the new issue of the to Brighton. creations? “My stuff tends to put off people who are looking for conventional magazine is online. The show sold out bridalwear, but attracts those who are interested in finding out what’s possible.” Go to www.gscene.com and when it premiered at There must be a lot of them in Brighton. press the button for facebook. the Comedy Festival in Edinburgh last year. “Oh yeah! When I did the Gay Wedding Show at The Metropole that was a real eye- Join the Gscene mailing list It covers the history of Britain and what opener. I went expecting to aim at gay male civil partnerships, because I also do and you will be kept up to date makes the British so great. Shelley will elaborate waistcoats and stuff. But actually it was the gay women who were more with all gay community cover areas such as religion, race, ethnicity, interested. They said because they never had this idea they could get married, developments as they happen. Victorian values and the myth of the British they’d never had that conventional fairy-tale idea of what they could wear.” Reviews of local arts Empire. She’s known for her hard-hitting I leave Kevin to finish some gowns for this month’s Brighton Frocks Fashion productions and restaurant humour. As well as being a comedienne, Weekend. “I love all that camp extravaganza kind of stuff. My background is in reviews are posted daily on the Shelley is also a presenter, actress, writer theatre so my stuff does tend to be quite extravagant – but I always wanted to website at www.gscene.com and a psychotherapy expert in the field of carry on with the bespoke strand as well. So I’m very happy that’s where I am Go online and check out this human behaviour and gender identity. at the moment.” months special investigation Shelley will be at the Laughing Horse, Kevin is auctioning the Rainbow Dress that Dolly Rocket wore at Brighton Pride about the LGBT Hate Crime upstairs at the Quadrant from May 9-12 2008 in aid of Pride, see details www.renaissancecreativedesign.co.uk Strategy. Tickets are £5 from the Brighton Fringe Box Richard Smith Office, on 01273 709709.
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14 GSCENE partnerships. Some may be surprised to learn that Burston is a big enthusiast. He married his boyfriend of five years, Paulo, in 2007 in a modest ceremony on Tower Bridge. Burston was as surprised as anyone. “I always said I wouldn’t drag myself up the aisle with anyone!” he laughs. “I used to call myself ‘queer’ and be involved with OutRage! and I thought anything assimilationist was wrong. But then this beautiful guy appeared in my life and changed everything. I really hate it when gay men get wrapped up in their own outsiderdom.”
He says he’d recommend getting married to anyone. “I think part of the reason you do it is for your friends and family really – and you do come away from it with some lovely photos. But also one’s sense of perception changes. I feel much closer to Paulo now. It’s almost like there is a bloodline between us.”
Burston calls the novel “a gay tale with two weddings and no funerals”. He started writing it soon after his own wedding (he thinks we should just forget about calling them ‘civil partnerships’). In it, he returns to the London gay scene – on which Burston is still not too keen. He tells me that he thinks “all that reckless hedonism is really unpleasant. It’s the basis of a key friendship in the book.”
“I really hate it when gay men get wrapped up in their own outsiderdom”
Burston quotes a line from a song by Suede: “’Class A, Class B, is that the only chemistry between us?’ I think just portraying ourselves as a gay lifestyle is not profound.” You’ll probably recognise some of London’s better- known queer faces and places in a thinly veiled form. Many who recognise themselves will not be too happy. The book’s central character Phil runs a bar in Soho – he’s the gay man who’s got it all. He’s also got a THE MARRYING KIND lovely boyfriend to whom he’s about to get hitched. Oh, and he also has a wife. Journo-turned-author Paul Burston unites comedy and a “It’s the only novel I’ve written with the word critical eye on gay life in his new novel, says Richard Smith ‘gay’ in the title,” Paul muses. “I do think you can argue that gay men are different to You could say Paul Burston has got a bit of a not completely sure if the younger Paul straights, but I guess what the book is saying reputation. He is also a big bundle of Burston would have liked them. Alan is ‘we are families.’” contradictions. He used to seem rather proud Hollinghurst they ain’t – think instead of a of being the bad boy of British gay journalism kind of gay Jackie Collins. They are The Gay Divorcee is – once famously vitriolic (and often rather unapologetically light comic reads, the sort of published by Little personally so), but he seems to have books that people take to the beach. Paul Brown on May 7. mellowed with age. He edits the lesbian and says he just wanted to write the kind of gay Paul Burston will be gay section of Time Out but is very critical of novel that he liked to read: “Nothing too reading from his much of the gay scene. He also runs his own literary, quite light but making some serious new book at Ghetto night, Polari (“a queer salon”). Fifteen years points.” It’s almost as if Burston has created Brighton, 129 St ago he founded Attitude and he now has a his own new literary genre – ‘dick-lit’, I guess James’s Street, on regular column in Boyz magazine – but he you could call it. His first novel Shameless Monday June 8 doesn’t appear to be too impressed with much dissected the London gay scene; Star People from 6.30pm. of the British gay press. took on Hollywood; while Lovers & Losers looked back at the ’80s music business. Paul and I used to be mortal enemies, but For Paul’s clothes, thanks to Joey at Closet we’re both grown-ups and have kissed and His new book, The Gay Divorcee, is a modern Case (47 Brewer Street, W1F 9UF, 020 7734 made up. In recent years he has developed a comedy of manners that deals with that 1652). Photo by Dean Stockings, new career as the author of four novels. I’m current warm potato, gay marriage and civil www.myspace.com/dean_stockings
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE 15
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 16 GSCENE
What’s the practical side of Regency gardening? The nature-assisted planting is the Regency style. They loved to bring nature into the town and in the 1800s there were new plants being introduced to the country, mixed together in complex relationships. Managing and pruning it can be difficult, keeping things in scale and keeping an eye on the ‘natural look’. I have to prune in a way that makes it look like nothing’s been done. Before Regency times it had been landscaped parklands or formal European planting. The Regency gardeners were very experimental and ever-so-slightly gaudy in their planting, but the basis of the gardens’ colour is green. What was the point of Regency gardens? The gardens at the Pavilion were always meant for pleasure, from the very beginning. They were created as a recreational and social space to aid promenading. Society flaunted itself in the gardens. Are all the phallic flowers in the garden a Regency trait? [Laughs] No, these plants echo the Pavilion itself. I like to think that the ‘spire’ plants relate to the minarets of the pavilion; foxgloves, hollyhocks, acanthus all do this, peeping and thrusting up through the shrubs. What’s the best advice anyone ever gave you? I can hear my father saying to me, “You should learn to toughen up”. He didn’t mean it in a macho way but to protect me. I’ve always been a very sensitive person and I suppose he was saying that the world can be a less-than-kind place. If we named a plant after you, what would it be? [Laughs and thinks for a long time] I’d like to be a winter flowering plant – something with a powerful scent that stays with you. Tell us about pests. BLOOM WITH A VIEW Mildew and rust can be a problem and the pigeons and squirrels can Robert Hill-Snook was appointed head gardener cause a lot of damage, but it’s always about keeping balance. People can do the most damage and I meet this with patience, diplomacy and to the newly restored Royal Pavilion Gardens of common sense. I am constantly amused by the pure bizarreness of Brighton in 1998. He knows his aspidistra from his Brighton. Just with the wear and tear of so many people, it can be a elderflower and his non sequiturs are sharper constant struggle to maintain the environment. It needs to be than secateurs. Eric Page caught up with him to conserved for appreciation but also remain accessible. talk about rococo gardens, Regency planting Do you have a secret Sussex garden? The Kipling Gardens in Rottingdean. They have a nice atmosphere and and his love for famous green-fingered lesbians the Edwardian period planting is excellent. You wind slowly up through the garden and end up on a hill looking out onto the landscape. Views You obviously thrive in an ericaceous soil – what was it that are very important. brought you to Brighton? What song would feature on the soundtrack of your life and who I’d been living in Wales and had a run of bad luck and then saw a job would play you in the film? in Little Thakeham. I got it and one thing led to another, as it does, I love Diana Ross’s Ain’t No Mountain High Enough. I’ve had and I saw the restored Pavilion Gardens in 1994. I liked it and there many a fantasy from that and I think Bette Davis with a pair of was a little seed that started to germinate. Felco’s secateurs. What’s it like working in the most beautiful park in the city? What’s the worse thing anyone’s ever said about you? You can get so bogged down in the slog and domestic side of [With a twinkle in his blue eyes] I had a criticism from someone who gardening and forget that this is a place that people love. It can called me “arrogant and obnoxious”. border on a spiritual feeling – there’s a mystery to this garden. I like Have you ever pulled at work? the idea that a visitor can see something inspirational. They say in a There have been the possibilities of later encounters. garden you’re close to God, and I suppose part of my job is to reveal a How’s your own garden? little part of God’s work. It’s very private – lots of high shrubs. I have a lot of scented plants: Is there much homophobia? tree peonies, Daphne odora and viburnum x burkwoodii. My favourite Not really. I’ve had aggro from the public and I challenge it but not by rose, Madame Hardy, is an old white rose with the most tremendous being confrontational. I like to use my humour and wit. I’m also on and fantastic scent. show in these gardens so I need to be careful not to show my vulnerable side. You have a favourite gardener? GARDENS WEEK Gardening is a little bit of instinct, a lot of vocation and heaps of Meet Robert during Gardens Week 2009 –a studying. I admire Gertrude Jekyll and her ‘plantwomanship’. She was celebration of the beautiful Grade II-listed ahead of her time and had an artistic originality and transmitted that gardens at Brighton’s Royal Pavilion – May into her planting. I’ve always been interested in the art side of 25–31. Talks, tours and practical workshops. gardening: the colour, planting and structure. I also enjoy Vita Many events will be held in a traditional Sackville-West. I inherited a signed book of hers from my grandmother. Swedish hat kåtas tent. Tickets for all Gardens This inspired me; you can imagine how intrigued I was when I learned Week events are available from the Royal that she was gay and had the whole Sissinghurst set-up. Pavilion Shop, call 01273 292798. MADAME HARDY ROSE
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18 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT
I used to fantasise about walking from my flat by Brighton Station down Queen’s Road into town, and there he would be, like an angel – my lifelong lover holding out his arms saying, “Welcome to me”.
When I was about 25 or so, I used to dream that everyone in the world could be on E. The revolution would come courtesy of The Brighton Love Gang. Yes, we actually used to call ourselves that, but I promise it really did involve a certain degree of irony. I still think this was the happiest time of my life. Even if it was only for a few hours on a Wednesday night at Club Shame or on a never-ending Saturday night at Trade. ‘Fantasy’ then meant that spine-tingling, bollock-tickling moment when DJ Craig Woodward would drop Baby D’s Let Me Be Your Fantasy around 1am at Shame.
When I was 30 or so, I gave up on my youthful dreams and finally caved in and settled down to reality and got a proper job. For the first time I also had a proper boyfriend. Meaning one that lasts for eight years instead of eight months or days or weeks. We were happy, settled, DREAMS & FANTASIES: contented, making a home together in Kemp Town. We almost got a small dog. It was where I always wanted to be. He was lovely, loving, I HAD A DREAM caring, handsome – and Spanish. This was the man of my dreams I’d dreamt of ever since I was 15. But being a bit of a gay cliché, I spent a What does every gay kid want – and want to be – lot of time fantasising about other men. when they grow up? It’s taken me ages to figure that one out, says Richard Smith When I was 35 or so, I became a complete gay cliché and I decided to run away from our dream home with a younger model. I guess – again – When I was about ten or so, I used to have this recurring dream that I that I just wanted to be free. The new man was a cute, fit, skinny, tall could fly. Little queeny ten-year-old me would be swimming through lad with a huge cock. Unfortunately though, there was one small flaw in the air. Almost certainly doing the breaststroke, knowing me. You don’t this plan. Ah yes, you’re ahead of me – he turned out to be a complete have to be Carl Jung to interpret that one. I was dreaming about rising fucking nightmare and eventually he in turn ran away with a younger up, being free. I was dreaming of escape. Though I only recall ever model. The little bitch. flying as far as the other side of my bedroom. I don’t know what my fantasies were at that age. But my bedroom’s wallpaper, with its dinky Now that I am 40 or so, all I know is that no one knows anything. little pictures of cowboys that my mum so kindly let me choose, was Least of all me. Dreams? Pah! I should have stuck with those dinky probably a pretty good guide to what was going on in my unconscious little cowboys on my wallpaper really, shouldn’t I? ten-year-old mind.
When I was about 15 or so, I spent most of my time daydreaming about my best friend Ivan. He was voted Most Likely To Go To Borstal three years running. He was so cool and so pretty. He was our school’s Danny Zuko. I spent a lot of my time dreaming then. That’s what people like us do when we feel we’re trapped in a nightmare. My big dream back then was just to meet other people like me. Where could they be? I had no idea how to find them. Sometimes I wondered if they actually existed. I had heard if you ran away to London the streets would be paved with gays. But I’d always lived just outside there and I’d never seen any. My fantasies at this point mainly involved killing Margaret Thatcher and doing something else entirely to Matt Dillon and Nick Heyward from Haircut 100.
“My fantasies at this point mainly involved killing Margaret Thatcher and doing something else entirely to Matt Dillon”
When I was about 20 or so, I was so happy. I was living a dream I’d never dared dream. I’d somehow ended up in Brighton – the land of the gays! I’d escaped and I was finally free. It was all kind of by serendipity or accident or something, really. I was always too much of a klutz to do anything that might actually improve my life situation. The thing that made me happiest then was working with the Section 28 Campaign in Brighton. That was where I met other people who felt like me – which meant angry. That was the dream.
When I said before I was so happy, I wasn’t that happy. I’d started going out with other gay men for the first time, and that’s a surefire way to make anyone feel as miserable as rain. I’d go out every Saturday and have my heart smashed by the next Sunday. Time. After. Fucking. Time. Oh, the misery of being a teenage queen…
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20 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT ONE NIGHT IN BANGKOK In March we featured the temptations of Boyz Town in Pattaya; this month Graham Anderson suggests an evening (or two) in Thailand’s amazing capital
The scene in Bangkok is vibrant and amazingly diverse and has a reputation for ‘anything goes’. Bangkok gay venues offer everything from gay-friendly accommodation, clubs, bars, ladyboy shows, go-go bars, saunas and massage parlours.
One hotel that is conveniently placed for all the action is the Tarntawan Place Hotel, situated in a quiet courtyard off Surawong Road. It offers all the facilities expected of a classy boutique hotel.
Just over the road from the Tarntawan is Soi Duangthawee Plaza (aka Boy Plaza or Soi Twilight): a street filled with everything Silom Soi 4 manages to blend the buzz of an entertainment area with a you could desire. Go-go, massage, sexy shows and the famous Dick’s warm, welcoming atmosphere and has something to offer everyone Café – the first and most popular café in the street. through to the early hours. One block along from Surawong Road is Silom Road, with shops galore If you fancy a meal or just a relaxing drink you have two fantastic and plus the legendary gay street Silom Soi 4, located close to Bangkok’s well-established gay favourites to choose from: Balcony Pub and the famous Patpong night market. newly refurbished Telephone Pub. Both bars are favourites with locals and visitors alike and regularly have events and promotions.
If you require something more energetic then chill out in one of the soi’s music bars, view the work of the local young artists in the art gallery or even get a distinctive tattoo as a souvenir of your visit to Thailand.
If it is dancing you want then Silom has a street for that – Silom Soi 2. This small street is the home of Asia’s most popular gay disco, DJ Station, which gets packed, and when this closes in the early hours there is GOD (Guys On Display). One night in Bangkok is definitely not enough.
INFO www.silomsoi4.net www.tarntawan.com
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22 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT
Staying the night here would almost be like sleeping in an enchanted castle – it’s the genuine article. One room is supposed to be haunted (of course).
They have a thatched tree house, situated in a sycamore tree in the grounds where you can have dinner and almost anything else it seems, as it’s called ‘an adult space’. I didn’t have look inside, it would be a bit too grown- AMAZING SUSSEX BY THE SEA up for me! It’s all about recession chic these days. It’s smart not to make None of this comes cheap. We are supposed to pointless journeys to places no one can really afford when there are be in the grip of a major recession, which large parts of Britain that are still largely empty and utterly beautiful. doesn’t seem to have reached Amberley yet – Roger Wheeler ambles to Amberley rooms start at £165. Part of my philosophy is never to pay the brochure or ‘rack’ rate – ask Just a few miles north of Arundel is with four-poster beds and lots of heavy for a deal. You will be very surprised at what Amberley, a tiny village noted mainly for its drapery, antique furniture and whirlpool baths. you can get. working museum – a 36-acre open-air exhibit Some have their own sitting rooms and access dedicated to the industrial heritage of the to the battlements. The management is all local, which is a South East. A few minutes up the road is change. Amberley Castle is a member of Relais Amberley Castle, almost out of sight of the There’s a suit of armour standing guard at one & Châteaux, the worldwide grouping of luxury road and not actually a castle, more a fortified end of the 12th-century hall, which has a high hotels, and it is run as an independent hotel manor house. It is more than 900 years old. barrel-vaulted ceiling. Star of the dining room although part of the Von Essen Group. is Kelvin the sommelier, a gentleman aged somewhat like the wines he treasures with a Go for tea or lunch for a special treat – you real twinkle in his eye and a very knowing know you’re worth it. smile. They have a special lunch offer for £20 – extremely good value for money. www.amberleycastle.co.uk The chef, James Dugan, is aiming for a www.amberleymuseum.co.uk Michelin Star and so the presentation is artistic and creative. There is some mean lamb and a – wait for it – Carrot Compression, Stinking Bishop Fritter with Cardamom Influences, followed by Lemon Dacquoise Veil and Peppermint Cream. You have really got to smile at such pretentious nonsense to Just 24 miles from Brighton, this is an describe some carrots with a bit of cheese and amazing place. It’s been a hotel since 1988 a lovely lemon mousse. The menu is not huge and has now gone very ‘country house’, and and most of it is in English you can try as I might I can’t find anything to understand, while the food is excellent, well criticise. This place is not something you cooked and lots of it. expect just a few miles from home; it’s a beautiful old house, all moats, lakes, gravel drives, ancient castle walls, gardens, lawns, and even a working portcullis, in case any guests want to do a runner without paying the bill, perhaps.
It has 19 rooms all named after local towns or bishops of Chichester. All are, of course, decorated and furnished to the ultimate in comfort and good old-fashioned style – nice almost beyond words. All the bedrooms have the wow-factor (such an overused expression)
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24 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT DANCE MUSIC LPS BY KATE WILDBLOOD
I’m writing this on a Tuesday As for bliss of a ‘greasy, dirty’ kind morning after a rather large Easter I suggest you head CLAUDE weekend. You’d think this would VONSTROKE’s way and his mix for require the volume down not up, Fabric 46 on Fabric Records. but there’s only one way through Never has a girl been so swept off it and that’s new tunes, so here her feet and her neighbours so are my May must-haves. bassed-out by this mix of womps, stomps and fun- FOR MEGAMEGAMEGA.COM HED KANDI fuelled beats. PIC BY MATTHEW BRINDLE returns to the Dirtybird. And if compilation you want it market with The electronica and Mix: Spring electrifying, try 2009. Rammed with more sweet Kings Of Little Kingdom, a moments than a box of chocs, it selection from Gung-Ho! Records. OH-MY-NEUF AND FIFILICIOUS ARE TWO DJS FROM offers layers of dancefloor smashes It twists, it turns and it takes no THE GHETTO WITH THEIR FINGERS IN MANY PIES. and underground delights, prisoners. Just how we like our LESS TALK, MORE (DECK) ACTION including the fabulous Lisa Millett electronic soul, tech and house. on Juan Kidd & Felix Finally my OMG album of the Past glories: Baumgartner’s Now You’re Gone, month: KEVIN SAUNDERSON OMN: Club Motherfucker in London, Vice magazine parties, Shibby Ali Payami’s Dancin (Disco Lips returns and he’s rewritten history. Shabblers, Wonky, Ladiez Di(e) and Madame JoJo’s. remix) and the wonderful Henrik History Elevate on KMS Records Fifi: Fierce, Shibby Shabblers, Dynamite Boogaloo (RIP). B remix of Soulsearcher’s Can’t and Fabric Present wonders: Get Enough. Hed’s up to the Kandi. Recordings is OMN: Milk Teeth at Micro (Digital’s VIP room), Frat Party at Ghetto, simply genius. which blends hip hop and bubblegum pop every Monday, plus the odd PACHA. One The Detroit London guest slot at nights such as Twisted Sisters in Hackney. word. One techno legend Fifi: Frat Party, Wig Out, Sirens and Eurotrash at Ghetto, Milk Teeth at reputation. And does things to Micro and Pop Kraft at New Hero. this month it is tunes including Cerrone’s As far as Brighton is concerned, Can U Feel It? celebrating with Supernature, the Pet Shop Boys’ OMN: Brighton is a tiny town with a loud atmosphere – there’s such a a compilation that spans over 30 Go West and Hercules and Love huge selection of impressive sounds down here. I can find myself at a years. Pacha Classics on New Affair I’d not thought possible. ’60s jive night on a Friday, then a huge crunk and hyphy party on a State is a three-disc affair reliving Add his own production remixes Saturday. It’s all catered for and no night bus is required – saviour. almost every glorious moment in including Good Love, Rock To The Fifi: Yessir! Especially in the summer, it’s all about impromptu parties on house-music history and if you Beat and Bassline and you have a the beach with a boom box. I like to hear new music and watch cabaret don’t find a track on here to revive compilation that enhances any and half-naked girls doing crazy burlesque, so Brighton is perfect for me! your love affair with house, I’ll day. Especially a Tuesday. Enjoy. What do you do to Release The Pressure? worry for you. Be it Blaze, OMN: I listen to old Lil’ Kim records at home and spend a dangerously Sanchez, Richard Grey or Silicone Catch Wildblood @ Wild Fruit, high percentage of my wages on vintage vests and overpriced sneakers. Soul with their immense Right On, Sunday Sundae, Rebel, Electronic I’m a sucker for limited edition. I’m also partial to gin and tonics and there is a moment of Pacha bliss Disco and Muzika this May. trying to convince my housemate to let me get a poodle. for everyone. www.katewildblood.com Fifi: I eat sushi and sing karaoke. Fun times! And to Move Your Body? WILDBLOOD’S MAY WONDERS OMN: I’m in love with bitch rap and quality hip hop, so ODB, The Cool Kids, MC Lyte, Bunny Rabbit, Coco Rosie etc. As a DJ I play grime, DR KUCHO! Patricia Never Leaves The House Net’s Work International dubstep, UK funky, hip hop and bass – big guys like Drop The Lime, Would you if the groove was this good? This tune won’t leave us alone. Benga, Caspa and Foamo. I also have an unhealthy and guilty addiction UNess Never Let U Back (Steve Haines remix) SoulHeat Records to old skool UK garage, especially Ms Dynamite and Sticky-Boo. Tina Beauty meets a beast of a bassline and blows us away. Turner is my ultimate woman. End of story. SYBIL Stronger (Quentin Harris vocal mix) Deep Sugar Fifi: I love dancing to rockabilly and ’60s girl groups – it’s my favourite A god and goddess create a heavenly slice of house that you will worship. music to listen to at home with the boy. French pop is also a complete JASON RIVAS Children Shouldn’t Play With Funky Things Playdagroove guilty pleasure. Filthy disco anyone? Is Music Is The Answer? JOEY CHICAGO Jane (Agent Stereo remix) Discogalaxy Records OMN: Nope. Grace Jones is the answer. One for spinning out to – an apt Wildblood tune right now. Fifi: Definitely! J’aime le disco! RUBIX BAISER Sur La Disco We Are All Kidz A horn-rammed French twisted disco wonder – ideal for le weekend! TOP SIX TUNES OF THE MOMENT CEVIN FISHER The Freaks Come Out (Prok & Fitch remix) Subversive LA ROUX In 4 The Kill (L-Vis 1990 RIP Hyperbass remix) Can’t wait for this to hit the Fruity dancefloor. BOK BOK Whole World Changing 4x4 DJ HERBIE 2.0 (Re-Think About) (DJ Herbie remix) Stop And Go PALEFACE AND KYLA Do You Mind (Crazy Cousins remix) Old skool sample that’ll get you racing down memory lane and having a ball. WANDA JACKSON Let’s Have A Party KENNY GROUND feat Nicole D Don’t Leave Me (vocal mix) Enjoy Music THE BIRD AND THE BEE Don’t Stop The Music A Queen Josephine favourite that’s been rocking her regal world. TTC Travailler SANDY RIVERA ft LT Brown Come Into My Room (Take It Back mix) Defected www.twitter.com/laura_milkteeth Soulful house nugget that comes complete with complimentary sunshine. www.myspace.com/bsdboomboom
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26 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT PICS FROM ANGEL + AQUARIUM + AMSTERDAM
MAY LISTINGS
ANGEL I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Thurs (14) Ophelia Misfortune is holding a clairvoyant evening starting at 9pm. I Winging it! Stand up comedy night on Wed (6 & 20) at 8.30pm. Open Mic Night is at 9pm on Wed (13 & 27). Trudi Styles appears every Fri evening at 9pm. I Sat at 9pm has Spice (8 & 30), Eurovision Song Contest Party hosted by Violet Venim at 8pm (16) and Alan Bonner & band with support from Amity (23). I Happy hour is every Tuesday from 6-8pm. Drinks deals include selected pint at £2, selected bottles £2 and Sourz £1.50 a shot. I Open Tue–Fri 5pm–late, Sat & Sun 2pm–late and on bank Holiday Mondays (4 & 24) from 2pm–late
FRIDAY 1 I DR BRIGHTON’S Ms Masters plays funky house from 9pm, bar opens 1pm I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-5am, restaurant: AMSTERDAM 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-5am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I GHETTO Popstarz: indie anthems, alternative classics, DJs Pookie, Beast, Tommy & Dynamite I ONE FOR THE DIARY: This month’s senior citizens lunch is on Tues (12). For £17.50 couples £15, smokers patio, pre-club drinks, you get a freshly prepared 3 course lunch plus half a bottle of wine and entertainment Weekend start, Late night bar 1am-5am Sal, free b4 11pm then £3, club opens 5.30pm GROSVENOR Weekend starts here! Women only from one of the local cabaret artists. Reservations are advisable tel. 01273 688825 I ANGEL Cabaret: Trudi Styles, divatastic I showcase 9pm, bar opens 5pm night from 8pm, opens 5pm I Mon at 7pm is Quiz Night. Wed at 8pm is midweek student karaoke with drinks deals JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Boogie Nights, I AQUARIUM Vocal talents of Janet December I for students on production of ID including pints of Becks £2, Fosters £1.50 and draft soft from 9.30pm bar opens 1pm live DJ plays old classics drinks £1. I Start your cabaret Sun with a homemade and freshly cooked Sunday Roast KINGS ARMS Bar opens, 5pm I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Celebration: I while enjoying great views over the pier, £6.90 for one course and £7.90 for two courses. In hosted by Dolly Rocket, DJ Peter Castle plays girly I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- the evening join Connie Conway for karaoke at 8pm. Finish off your Cabaret Sun at the 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, Pre Celebration pop, disco & handbag, free, access all areas, late bar, which is now open till 5am. I Food is served daily from noon-8pm. There is a smoking area, open 11pm hosted by Dolly Rocket, outside smoking area, free access all floors full a la carte menu and daily specials. I The Sauna is open Sun–Thur 2pm–4am and I BRIGHTON TAVERN Traditional May Day on Fri/Sat 2pm–5am. Entry before 7pm is £5, after 7pm, £10 single entry or £15 for a Festivities with Morris Dancers, opens 11.30am I MARINE TAVERN Tight Squeeze with Nat & Dale, bar opens noon - 2am couple. The early bird special offer gets you access to the sauna 2pm–7pm for just £5. I BULLDOG 87 Hour Long Weekend: main bar: DJ Marcia 10pm-2am, top bar: Karaoke hosted by I MARLBOROUGH Girls Night Out: guest DJs, live Guy 10pm-3am, bar opens 11am music, 8pm PV Thank Funk It’s Friday, bar opens noon I CALEDONIAN Karaoke 9.30pm, open 6pm I plays dance & remixes, free b4 11, £5 after, £3 11pm, then £4/£3NUS, club opens 5.30pm QUEENS ARMS Camp Attack: DJ Andy B 9pm I CHARLES ST BAR open noon, food noon- I after 3am, £3 NUS all night, open 10.30pm I GLOUNGE Fitladz Bonk Holiday Spunktacular, 8pm,Fairylee: pure cheese DJ Ruby Roo & Connie text requests on 07946 792444 bar opens noon I STAR INN Paulas Kitchen open 12-3pm, Big Resident DJs on rotation Paul Heron, Devilish & Conway, hosted Joan Bond 9pm I R-BAR Tops & Bottoms: order drinks, toss a Marias Fun Friday 8pm, bar open noon Johnny M, darkrooms, cruise areas, glory holes, £6 coin, winner gets same round for free, DJ Smiffy I CHARLES ST CLUB Curiosity Lite: DJs Ali & I VAVOOM Karaoke in upstairs lounge 10pm- members/£8, open 10.30pm-5am Ruby Roo play trashy/disco/pop, hosted by Connie from 8pm, Wii Zone, free pool upstairs, food (241 late, Late bar till 6am I GROSVENOR Grosvenor Groove, open 2pm Conway, £2, club opens 10.30pm vouchers available) midnight-7am, discount I WHITE HORSE Food: noon-5pm, heated I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Cabaret: Lady La passes for Revenge, bar opens noon I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, cabaret smoking patio, open noon Rue, 9pm corner with Jo Francis 9pm, secret beer garden, bar I REVENGE Level 1: Lollipop: 70s-00s, DJ I ZONE Cabaret: Gilly B & JJ 9pm, open 11am I KINGS ARMS Pre Party for Gladiator at Charles opens noon Stewart T plays top pop with the Lollipop girls, Street, DJ Charlie 9pm bar opens 11am Level 2: Altitude, DJ Alex Baker (Gaydar Radio) SATURDAY 2 I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-5am, Restaurant: 5pm, lounge opens 11am-5am, Pre Ignition from 11am-8pm, sauna 2pm-5am, £5 B4 7pm £10 7pm, heated smoking area, free entry to Basement after, £15 couple, smokers patio, Sun Downers! Club, access all floors Beach music & cocktails on terrace 7pm Late night I MARINE TAVERN It’s Saturday let’s party! b4 bar 1am-5am clubbing, bar open noon - 2am I ANGEL Mayday Mayhem with guest DJs, bar I MARLBOROUGH Lets Party! downstairs, 8pm opens 5pm I PV@JURY’S OUT Viva La Divas present live I AQUARIUM Two Landlord’s Karaoke 9pm, music with Chelle 6pm, Booty Call with Charity opens 1pm Shop Girls 8.30pm, bar opens noon I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Ignition: DJ I QUEENS ARMS Cabaret: Chrissie du Cann Peter Castle, free entry & access all areas, heated 4pm, Kamp Kevins karaoke 8pm, bar opens noon smoking area, club opens 11pm I R-BAR Kinky Classics, DJ Hollie 8pm- I BRIGHTON TAVERN Hooray for Saturday Party midnight, free pool upstairs, Wii zone, discount Night open till 2am, bar opens 11am Revenge tickets, night menu midnight-7am (241 I BULLDOG 87 Hour Weekend: main bar: VJ vouchers), bar opens noon John 10pm-3am, top bar: karaoke with Micky, I REVENGE Kinky Dangerous with the Sharp AQUARIUM THEATRE BAR 10pm-3am, bar open 24 hrs Boys! level 1 Kinky Pop: DJ Stu & Smiffy, play I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Sun (24) at 5.30pm it’s Handbags at Dawn, The Return I CALEDONIAN Piano bar hosted by Roberta pop/chart, level 2 Dangerous House: DJ Dulcie & Bout. Maisie Trollette and Pip Morgan will be trading punches as only these old school Slack 9.30pm, open 6pm The Sharp Boys play, funky chunky, vocal house, stars can. Not to be missed. I Dave Lynn makes his debut at the Aquarium on Sun (3) at I CHARLES ST BAR Food: 12-8pm, open 12 free b4 11, £5 b4 12, £7 b4 3am, £3 after and NUS 5.30pm. Other Sun bookings include, the Bournemouth Bombshell, Diane James (10), the I CHARLES ST CLUB Gladiator men only night: all night, £3 passes available from R-Bar, open Brighton & Hove (Actually) Gay Men’s Chorus (17) and Lady James (31). Cabaret on DJ Roberto Rocca, £5 b4 11pm, £7 after, club 10.30pm opens 10.30pm STAR INN Paulas kitchen open, 12-3pm, Great Sun is followed by Karaoke showtime. I On Sat (16) you can watch the Eurovision Song I Contest live from 8pm at Euro Trash Night. Mon & Wed is Piano Bar with piano vocalist I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret tunes to drink & shake to 9pm, open noon I beer garden, bar opens noon VAVOOM Bank Holiday Party, Upstairs VIP JB from 7pm. Tue is Josh Mills music night from 9pm. Thur is Who Dares Sings, I I I DR BRIGHTON’S DJ Tony B from 9.30pm, bar lounge, chart & dance music, late bar till 6am open mic night with Josh Mills from 9pm. Every Fri from 9.30pm you can hear the I opens 1pm I WHITE HORSE Food: Noon-5pm, Pool, heated vocal talents of Janet December. I Sat it’s Two Landlords Karaoke from 8pm. I GHETTO Wigout: seriously unserious pop night smoking patio, opens noon I The Aquarium is open Sun–Thurs 1pm–midnight, Fri and Sat 1pm–1am. with Fifilicious, Kitty & Boogaloo Stu, free b4 I ZONE Cabaret: Miss Hap 9.30pm, open 11am
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton PICS FROM BULLDOG + BRIGHTON TAVERN GSCENE OUT & ABOUT 27
MAY LISTINGS
BRIGHTON TAVERN I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Traditional May Day festivities on Fri (1) with Morris dancers and in the evening the BT’s very own May Queens are on parade. I Enjoy a pizza and pint every Mon night. Games every Tue. Wine Club every Wed. I Camp bingo every Thur in aid of the Sussex Beacon. I Its party, party, party every Fri & Sat. Revive your senses every Sun with one of the BTs infamous Bloody Mary’s. I Sat (16) it’s the Eurovision Song Contest party starting at 8pm. Free euro snack and potent euro shots served by your award winning euro bar staff. I The Brighton Tavener is open Sun–Thur from noon–midnight, on Fri from noon–2am and Sat from 11am–2am.
enjoy cool Pimms, Pizza & pint night,opens noon I CALEDONIAN Bar250, opens 6pm I BULLDOG 87 Hour Weekend Marcias Glitter I CHARLES ST BAR Food: 12-8pm, open noon BULLDOG Ball: 70/80s disco, 10pm-2am, bar opens 11am 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret ONE FOR THE DIARY: The Bulldog is staying open for 87 hours each bank holiday I I I CHARLES ST BAR Food: noon-8pm, Studio beer garden, bar opens noon weekend in May. Opens Fri (1 & 22) and closes Tues (5 & 26) at 2am in the morning. 150 warm up, bar opens noon I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of I Happy hours: Mon–Thurs 3pm–7pm and 11–12am. Fri 3pm–7pm and I CHARLES ST CLUB Studio 150: Charles St drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm 10pm–12am. Sat 10pm–12am and all day Sun. Pints from £1.80, alco-pops from £1.80 Official Student Fun Night, DJs Luke Smith & Ali K, I GHETTO Alan The Mentalist hosts Quiz Alicious and spirit & mix from £1.20. On both bank holiday Mon (4 & 25) happy hours are on all dancers, theme nights, open 10.30pm 8pm, £1 entry, winner gets all the dosh, Twisted drinks all day. Wed between 11am–2am its Red Light Rush. All drinks are £1.50 when I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, fun Karaoke with Cat 10pm, club opens 5.30pm the selected artist plays. www.bulldogbrighton.com quiz, 8pm, secret beer garden, bar opens noon I GROSVENOR Bar opens 5pm I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of I KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm choose the music, bar opens 11am SUNDAY 3 6pm, Drag King Quiz 7pm I GHETTO Frat Party!: Star Wars Theme, DJs I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- Pookie, Beast, Fiflicious & Oh-My Neuf, from 9pm, 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all I PV@JURY’S OUT Sunday roast noon till I AMSTERDAM Open 11am-5am, Sunday lunch club opens 5.30pm floors, heated smoking area noon-5.30pm, Connies karaoke 8pm-10.30pm, finished, free Wii after 5pm bar opens noon I GROSVENOR May Day open 2pm I MARINE TAVERN Quiz with Nat 9pm, entry £1 sauna 2pm-4am £5 B4 7pm, £10 after, couples I QUEENS ARMS Cabaret: Davina Sparkle, I IRON DUKE Pop Quiz 8.30pm, opens 1pm per person, 50% to charity, 50% to Snowball, bar £15, heated smokers patio. Late bar 1am-5am 5.30pm, then Betty’s karaoke, bar opens noon I KINGS ARMS Bank holiday games & chill, play opens noon ANGEL Chill Out! kick back & relax, opens 2pm I R-BAR Sublime Sundays, roasts till 7pm, I Wii & PS3 on screens 4 free, open 11am I MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts noon-6pm AQUARIUM Dave Lynn’s Aquarium debut acoustic session, 5pm, Miss Jason’s Barmy Bingo I I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- Drag King & Transvestite Night with (killer) pool & 5.30pm followed by Karaoke, opens 1pm 8.30pm, free pool upstairs, Wii zone, opens noon REBEL AFTERHOURS@HONEYCLUB 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, Cabaret Maisie poker, £2 8pm I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Fever: I Discount wristbands available Wild Fruit £6, £8 on Trollette & Josh Mills 3.15pm, free access all I PV@JURY’S OUT Is it only Tuesday? afterwork DJ/producer Ross Alexander (Anthem/Northern floors drinks deals 5-8pm, free nintendo Wii all day, bar Beat), free entry, access all areas, heated smoking the door, 3am-late I MARINE TAVERN Monday club with Lawrence, opens noon area, open 11pm I REVENGE Girls On Top Bank Holiday Party, Lady Bex & Smiffy, £5 or free with R-Bar pass, bar opens noon-2am I QUEENS ARMS Skint Unlimited Drinks & I BRIGHTON TAVERN Recovery Sunday, candle- 10.30pm I MARLBOROUGH Free darts & pool noon-6pm Karaoke: DJ & karaoke night hosted by Betty let chillout session 8pm bar open noon Trans, queer and friends/family/partners night Swollocks 8pm, bar opens noon BULLDOG 87 Hour weekend: main bar DJ I STAR INN Mega Sunday lunch from Paulas I “Triple Echo” on cinema screen, £3 I R-BAR Get ready for Revenge, DJ Simone, free Grant 5pm-10pm, DJ Wayne 10pm-2am; top bar: kitchen 12-4pm, Supersize free buffet 6pm, bar I QUEENS ARMS May Day Cabaret:, Lola pool & Wii zone, bar opens noon Karaoke, Micky 10-2am, bar open 11am opens noon SUNDAY SUNDAE@AUDIO Alfresco Flirt Fest, Lasagne, 5.30pm then Betty’s karaoke, open 12 I REVENGE Sound As A Pound, Top DJs play an I CALEDONIAN Opens 5pm-late I free BBQ 6pm-8pm, DJs on Rotation Kate I PV@JURY’S OUT Sundaylicious roast noon till eclectic collection of 80s, 90s, 00s, electro pop, I CHARLES ST BAR Sunday Lunches noon- 5pm, free Wii after 5pm bar opens noon dance, cheese. You can win the door money, entry 7.15pm, cabaret: Lola Lasagne 7.15pm, hosted by Wildblood, Jon Byrne, Richard Jones, Diablo, Miss I R-BAR Miss Jason’s Mad House: 10pm, free £1, opens 10.30am Connie Conway, bar opens noon Masters, Mike Mikalis & Brian Cheetham, £3 b4 pool, Wii zone, bar opens noon I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm bar 112 CHURCH ST Richards Sunday Roast, 7pm, £4 b4 8pm then £5, 6pm-late I I REVENGE PAYDAY LGBT Brighton’s Popular opens noon noon-late secret beer garden, bar opens noon I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am WHITE HORSE Sunday roast noon-5pm, pool, Student Party, £2 NUS/£3 others, open 10.30 I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am I DR BRIGHTON’S Cafe Del Mar chill out, outside I smoking patio, opens noon I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm free I WHITE HORSE Food noon-5pm, pool, heated drinking area, bar open 1pm buffet from 4pm bar opens noon smoking patio, opens noon FISHERMANS REST (RESTAURANT) Sunday I WILD FRUIT@TRU Sex Saloon! hosted by I I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am I ZONE James’ big money quiz night 8pm, bar cabaret lunch 4pm: 5 courses & coffee, £19.50, Dolly Rocket with special guest DJs Prok & Fitch, Neil Duffie and Jon Byrne on main dance floor, I WHITE HORSE Pool, heated smoking patio, open 11am Miss Jason @ 7pm, reservations 01273 323888 opens noon GHETTO 80s Back Comb Distaster:,ultimate 80s Freddie Thomas in the The Bouroir, Pop, Mish/Mash I I ZONE You Say We Play, choose any music you WEDNESDAY 6 throwdown, DJs Duran Darran & Philis Collins, madness in the Bamboogy.£6 NUS, £9 queue want all day & night, bar open 11am I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-1am, Restaurant: 10pm, club opens 5.30pm jump/advance, £10 guests b4 11pm, £12 guests after 11pm, open 10pm-3am 11am-8pm, Sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I GROSVENOR Chill out Sunday, open 2pm TUESDAY 5 couples £15, Student midweek karaoke + special IRON DUKE Steves Sunday lunch 1-6pm I ZONE Kitty Monroe 4.30pm bar open 11am I I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: drinks deals 8pm, heated smokers patio JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Miss Jason’s I MONDAY 4 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I ANGEL Winging It!, Stand Up Comedy Night, Barmy Bingo with bascon sandwich or chips, 5pm couples £15, Tues social 7pm, heated smokers patio, 8.30pm bar opens 5pm KINGS ARMS Cruise & booze with guest DJ I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: I I ANGEL Bar opens 5pm I AQUARIUM Piano Bar with JB, music for all 7pm bar opens 11am 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I AQUARIUM Josh Mills music night, an tastes 7pm, opens 1pm LEGENDS Terrace open all day, lounge bar couples £15, Big Quiz hosted by Nick with great I invitation to sing 9pm, opens 1pm I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Gabbi’s Dirty 11am-5am Mandy Gap 3.15pm, heated smoking prizes, £1 entry, 7pm, heated smokers patio I BASEMENT CLUB @ LEGENDS Scene Queen: Handbag: DJ Gabbi plays, dirty handbag & house, area, free access all floors I ANGEL Bank Holiday Wind Down, open 2pm AQUARIUM Piano Bar with JB, music for all DJ Lil’Alex, special drinks deals with student/scene free, access all floors, smoking area, open 11pm I MARINE TAVERN Elsie’s Packed Lunch, bar I tastes 7pm, opens 1pm ID, open 11pm I BRIGHTON TAVERN Wine Club, open noon opens 1pm - 1am BRIGHTON TAVERN Games Galore in the BULLDOG Red Light Rush: cheap drinks when I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Back to The I I I MARLBOROUGH Sunday roasts: noon to evening, opens noon select artist plays 8pm-1am, open 11am finish, Walking Group: roast for you & your dog 80s & 90s: DJ Steve Lush, free entry & access all I BULLDOG Bully Boyz men only top bar, I CALEDONIAN Bar250, opens 6pm noon, Clare Project MTFs/FTMs/Gender Queers/ areas, heated smoking area, open 11pm members only 10pm-2am, bar opens 11am I CHARLES ST BAR Food: 12-8pm, open noon Transvestites/partners/friends & family social, £1, I BRIGHTON TAVERN Bank Holiday special,
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 28 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT PICS FROM CALEDONIAN + 112 CHURCH STREET
MAY LISTINGS
CALEDONIAN CHURCH STREET I ONE FOR THE DIARY: The Piano Bar hosted by Roberta Slack returns every Sat at I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Cabaret Corner every Fri at 10pm features Jo Francis (1), 9.30pm. Lilly Le France hosts (9). I Karaoke every Fri at 9.30pm. I Bar 250 is every Lady La Rue (8), Maisie Trollette (15), Miss Jason (22) and Krissie du Cann (29). Tue to Thur with all pints, bottles and double house spirits and mixers at £2.50. I Every Mon is quiz night at 8pm. I Food is served seven days at week, noon–late. I The Caledonian is open Tue–Sat from 6pm–late. Closed on Sun and Mon except for Sun lunch has a Gscene recommendation. I Church Street is open Sun noon–10.30pm, May Bank Holiday Sun when it’s open from 5pm–late. Mon–Thurs noon–11pm, Fri–Sat noon–1am.
I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret I CALEDONIAN Karaoke 9.30pm, open 6pm I BABALON LOUNGE Womens Disco, £7 on door beer garden, bar opens noon beer garden, bar opens noon I CHARLES ST BAR open noon, food noon- or £5 with email or text I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of 8pm,Fairylee: pure cheese DJ Ruby Roo & Connie [email protected] door open 9pm drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm Conway, hosted Joan Bond 9pm I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Ignition: DJ I GHETTO Transition: Goth/metal/punk nite, DJ I GHETTO Sacrilege, the new Religion for I CHARLES ST CLUB Curiosity Lite: DJs Ali & Peter Castle, free entry & access all areas, heated Peter Von Sleaze, £2.50 from 10pm, open 5.30pm Brighton, DJs Jon Byrne & Ms Masters! £3 from Ruby Roo play trashy/disco/pop, hosted by Connie smoking area, club opens 11pm www.myspace.com/brightontransition 10pm, club opens 5.30pm Conway, £2, club opens 10.30pm I BRIGHTON TAVERN Hooray for Saturday Party I GROSVENOR Keeping Woolies Alive, bring an I GROSVENOR Bar opens 5pm I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, cabaret Night open till 2am, bar opens 11am ipod & play your own tunes in Pick ‘n’ Mix, open I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Best karaoke on corner with Lady La Rue 9pm, secret beer garden, I BULLDOG 63 Hour Weekend: main bar: VJ 5pm the south coast, 9pm bar opens noon John 10pm-3am, top bar: karaoke with Micky, I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Student night, I KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you I DR BRIGHTON’S Ms Masters plays funky house 10pm-3am, bar open 24 hrs Stripper College Boy, 9pm choose the music, bar opens 11am from 9pm, bar opens 1pm I CALEDONIAN Piano bar hosted by Lilly Le I KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- I GHETTO Popstarz: indie anthems, alternative France 9.30pm, open 6pm choose the music, bar opens 11am 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all classics, DJs Pookie, Beast, Tommy & Dynamite I CHARLES ST BAR Food: 12-8pm, open 12 I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- floors, heated smoking area Sal, free b4 11pm then £3, club opens 5.30pm I CHARLES ST CLUB Mardi Gras: DJ Queen Jo, 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all I MARINE TAVERN Gareths fun nite, open noon I GROSVENOR Weekend starts here! open 5pm funky house/anthems, visuals, sexy go go dancers, floors, heated smoking area, Gabbi’s fun & frolicks I MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts noon-6pm I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Boogie Nights, £3 b4 11 £5 after, open 11pm party night, 9pm Open mic: sing, play, tell a joke or listen 9pm live DJ plays old classics I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret I MARINE TAVERN Dale’s Midweek Mayhem, I PV@JURY’S OUT Pop Vixens, Pre Girls On I KINGS ARMS Brighton Bear, Cub & Otter beer garden, bar opens noon bar opens noon Top, free Revenge tickets, bar opens noon weekend, booze & cruise with DJ Boozy Bear 10pm I DR BRIGHTON’S DJ Tony B from 9.30pm, bar I MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts, noon- I QUEENS ARMS Skint: Unlimited Drinks & bar opens 11am opens 1pm 6pm Unique LGBTQU darts for all levels with Karaoke, 8pm-11pm, & karaoke with Betty, bar I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- I ELECTRONIC DISCO@CUCKOO CLUB surprise, £2 8pm opens noon 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, Pre Celebration (formerly Koo Klub) Hosted by Daphne Lee, DJs RI PV@JURY’S OUT Infamous Quiz night with I R-BAR Girls On Top warm up party: DJ Verity hosted by Dolly Rocket, outside smoking area, free Drew Palmer, Kate Wildblood, Queen Josephine, real prizes 8pm, bar opens noon 8pm-12pm, free Revenge passes, free pool access all floors Mike Mikalie & Miss Masters, £8 b4 12am £10 I QUEENS ARMS Anything Goes! DJ Kamp upstairs, free Wii zone, bar opens noon I MARINE TAVERN Tight Squeeze with Nat & after, 10pm-4am Kevin, karaoke, bingo, music & quiz, open noon I REVENGE Girls On Top Level 1: with DJs Dale, bar opens noon I GHETTO Wigout: seriously unserious pop night I R-BAR Get ready for Revenge, free pool/Wii Smiffy & Lady Bex playing chart/pop/trash/r’n’b. I MARLBOROUGH Girls Night Out: guest DJs, with Fifilicious, Kitty & Boogaloo Stu, free b4 zone, bar open noon Level 2: with DJ Dulcie & Richard Jones playing live music, 8pm 11pm, then £4/£3NUS, club opens 5.30pm I REVENGE Guilty: DJ Lil Alex, funky electro funky, vocal, house, £4/£3 NUS, free passes from I PV Thank Funk It’s Friday, bar opens noon I GROSVENOR Grosvenor Groove, open 2pm beats for bad boys & girls, free b4 12am/£2 after, R-Bar & PV, opens 10.30pm I QUEENS ARMS Camp Attack: DJ Andy B 9pm I IRON DUKE Live Irish music, 8.30pm free NUS, open 11pm I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm, Quiz text requests on 07946 792444 bar opens noon I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Cabaret: Maisie I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm bar of the week, Trivia galore! 9pm, free sarnies at half I R-BAR Tops & Bottoms: order drinks, toss a Trollette, 9pm opens noon time, bar opens noon coin, winner gets same round for free, DJ Smiffy I KINGS ARMS Brighton bear, cub & otter I VAVOOM Karaoke 10-late, late bar till 6am I TOM’S@GLOUNGE Leather/Fetish bar with from 8pm, Wii Zone, free pool upstairs, food (241 weekend, DJ Charlie 10pm bar opens 11am I WHITE HORSE Food noon-5pm, smoking dance area, free, go to www.tom-s.co.uk vouchers available) midnight-7am, discount I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- patio, open noon I VAVOOM Upstairs lounge VIP lounge, Late bar passes for Revenge, bar opens noon 5pm, lounge opens 11am-5am, Pre Ignition from I ZONE Karaoke Mis Stake! 8.30pm open 11am till 6am I REVENGE Level 1: Lollipop: 70s-00s, DJ 7pm, heated smoking area, free entry to Basement I WHITE HORSE Food: noon-5pm, pool, heated Stewart T plays top pop with the Lollipop girls, Club, access all floors THURSDAY 7 smoking patio, opens noon Level 2: Altitude, DJ Alex Baker (Gaydar Radio) I MARINE TAVERN It’s Saturday let’s party! b4 I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: I ZONE Comedy Film Zone, opens 11am plays dance & remixes, free b4 11, £5 after, £3 clubbing, bar open noon 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, after 3am, £3 NUS all night, open 10.30pm I MARLBOROUGH Lets Party! downstairs, 8pm couples £15, smokers patio, Relax & unwind FRIDAY 8 I STAR INN Paulas Kitchen open 12-3pm, Big I PV@JURY’S OUT Viva La Divas present live I ANGEL Cocktail night, bar opens, 5pm I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-5am, restaurant: Maria’s Fun Friday 8pm, bar opens noon music 5pm, Booty Call with DJ Rascall 8.30pm, I AQUARIUM Who Dares Sings open mic with 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-5am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I VAVOOM Karaoke in upstairs lounge 10pm- bar opens noon Josh Mills 9pm, opens 1pm couples £15, smokers patio, pre-club drinks, late, Late bar till 6am I QUEENS ARMS Cabaret: Cherry Poppin 4pm, I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Boys Below: Weekend start, Late night bar 1am-5am I WHITE HORSE Food: noon-5pm, heated Kamp Kevins karaoke 8pm, bar opens noon men only night, DJ Phill Marriott (Q Radio) plays I ANGEL Cabaret: Trudi Styles, divatastic smoking patio, open noon I R-BAR Kinky Classics, DJ Hollie 8pm- commercial house with a progressive edge, top showcase 9pm, bar opens 5pm I ZONE Deborah D’arcy 9.30pm, open 11am midnight, free pool upstairs, Wii zone, discount stripper, free entry, access all floors, smoking area, I AQUARIUM Vocal talents of Janet December Revenge tickets, night menu midnight-7am (241 open 11pm from 9.30pm bar opens 1pm SATURDAY 9 vouchers), bar opens noon I BRIGHTON TAVERN Barmy Bingo with Fi for I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Celebration: I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-5am, Restaurant: I REVENGE Kinky Dangerous! level 1 Kinky Pop: Sussex Beacon 8.30pm, opens noon hosted by Dolly Rocket, DJ Peter Castle plays girly 11am-8pm, sauna 2pm-5am, £5 B4 7pm £10 DJ Stu & Smiffy, play pop/chart, level 2 I BULLDOG top bar: Belong with DJ Grant 10pm- pop, disco & handbag, free, access all areas, after, £15 couple, smokers patio, Sun Downers! Dangerous House: DJ Dulcie & guests play, funky late, bar opens 11am smoking area, open 11pm Beach music & cocktails on terrace 7pm Late night chunky, vocal house, free b4 11, £5 b4 12, £7 b4 I CALEDONIAN Bar250, opens 6pm I BRIGHTON TAVERN Weekend Starts Here! bar 1am-5am 3am, £3 after and NUS all night, £3 passes I CHARLES ST BAR & CLUB Food noon-8pm, Party night open till 2am, bar opens noon I ANGEL Sprice Showtime 9pm bar opens 5pm available from R-Bar, open 10.30pm Mad Cow XL: hosted by Ms Bond, DJ Lil Alex & I BULLDOG 63 Hour Long Weekend: main bar: I AQUARIUM Two Landlord’s Karaoke 9pm, I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open, 12-3pm, Great LeeRoy downstairs 8pm, upstairs 10pm, entry £1 DJ Marcia 10pm-2am, top bar: Karaoke hosted by opens 1pm tunes to drink & shake to 9pm, open noon to good causes, bar opens noon Guy 10pm-3am, bar opens 11am
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton
30 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT PICS FROM CHARLES ST GAMES SHOW, MAD COW, CURIOSITY + TRANSISTER
MAY LISTINGS
CHARLES STREET BAR I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Charles Street is living up to its title as Golden Handbag Awards favourite cabaret venue with packed houses every Sun at 7.15pm with Lola Lasagne (3), Kandi Kane (10), Sandra (17), All mouth no trousers (24) and Rose Garden (31). The Brighton Heat of Drag Idol V follows cabaret on Sun 24 at 8.30pm hosted by Connie Conway and Lady James. I Check out the daily food offers. Food is served Mon–Sun noon–8pm. Sunday lunch is £5.95 or £7.95 for two people. I Value hour each day 5-8pm CHARLES STREET CLUB I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Thursday is MAD COW XL with Ms Bond and DJs Lil Alex and LeeRoy for this Brighton institution. Spread out over 2 floors with access to heated smoking terrace all night. All drinks are from £1 on both floors (excl Champagne, bottles of wine and Smirnoff Ice/Black). Entry is £1 downstairs from 8pm and £1 upstairs from 10pm. The door money goes to good causes. I VAVOOM Superstars Theme Party, Upstairs VIP I QUEENS ARMS Cabaret: Tiffaney Wells, I London clubbing returns to Brighton on Sat (2) with GLADIATOR. David Dindol and lounge with chart & dance music, late bar till 6am 5.30pm, then Betty’s karaoke, bar opens noon Roberto Roca are launching this monthly one nighter for men only with zero attitude. David I WHITE HORSE Food: Noon-5pm, Pool, heated I R-BAR Sublime Sundays, roasts till 7pm, has been promoting clubs for over six years including XXL, Beatwood, Zooogy and Growl smoking patio, opens noon acoustic session, 5pm, Miss Jason’s Barmy Bingo London. Robert has been DJing in Italy and Spain for the past five years and has promoted club I ZONE Sally Vate, 9.30pm bar open 11am 8.30pm, free pool upstairs, Wii zone, bar opens noon nights in Italy. Opening night DJs Adam Van Hell and Ethan Millman play funky house with SUNDAY 10 I STAR INN Mega Sunday lunch from Paulas some minimal vibes towards the end. Gladiator is the first Saturday of every month. £5 b4 I AMSTERDAM Open 11am-5am, Sunday lunch kitchen 12-4pm, Supersize free buffet 6pm, bar 11pm, £7 after, doors 10.30pm. www.kings-nights.com noon-5.30pm, Connies karaoke 8pm- 10.30pm, opens noon I STUDIO 150 every Monday is Charles Street’s official credit crunching student night with sauna open 2pm-4am £5 B4 7pm, £10 after, I SUNDAY SUNDAE@AUDIO Alfresco Flirt Fest, DJs Luke Smith and Ali K. Most drinks are £1.50 for singles or bottle. Entry is £1.50 couples £15, heated smokers patio. Late night bar free BBQ 6pm-8pm, DJs on Rotation Kate I CURIOSITY LITE on Fridays features DJ Ali (Juice FM), Ruby Roo (Radio Reverb & 1am-5am Wildblood, Jon Byrne, Richard Jones, Diablo, Miss Fairlea) and hostess Connie Conway. Doors 10.30pm, drinks £2, entry £2 b4 11pm. I ANGEL Chill Out! kick back & relax, bar open 2pm Masters, Mike Mikalis & Brian Cheetham, £3 b4 TRANSISTER on Sat (16) A must for all Trannies, gorgeous gay guys, delicious dykes and AQUARIUM Diane James 5.30pm, followed by 7pm, £4 b4 8pm then £5, 6pm-late I I in-betweenies. Great drink deals all night. Advance tickets www.transisterbrighton.co.uk Karaoke Showtime, opens 1pm I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am MARDI GRAS Sat (9, 23 & 30) with DJ Queen Josephine. Entry £3 b4 11pm £5 after I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Fever: I WHITE HORSE Sunday roast noon-5pm, pool, I DJ/producer Ross Alexander (Anthem/Northern smoking patio, opens noon and doors open 11pm. www.charles-street.com Beat), free entry, access all areas, heated smoking I ZONE Karaoke 6.30pm, bar open 11am I ABSOLUTELY DRAGULOUS returns Sun (31) with Sweet Charity, starring Dave Lynn, area, open 11pm Maisie Trollette, Lady James, Connie Conway & Jamie Watson, entry £5, doors open I BRIGHTON TAVERN Recovery Sunday, candle- MONDAY 11 8pm showtime 9pm. For more infor view: www.charles-street.com let chillout session 8pm bar open noon I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: I BULLDOG 63 Hour weekend: main bar DJ 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, Grant 5pm-10pm, DJ Wayne 10pm-2am; top couples £15, Big Quiz hosted by Nick with great I MARLBOROUGH Free darts & pool noon-6pm I BULLDOG Bully Boyz men only top bar, bar: Karaoke, Micky 10-2am, bar open 11am prizes, £1 entry, 7pm, heated smokers patio Trans, queer and friends/family/partners night members only 10pm-2am, bar opens 11am I CHARLES ST BAR Sunday Lunches noon- I ANGEL Available for private hire “Kinky Boots” on cinema screen, £3 I BRIGHTON TAVERN Games Galore, open 12 7.15pm, cabaret: Kandi Kane 7.15pm, hosted I AQUARIUM Piano Bar with JB playing music I PV@JURY’S OUT I Don’t Like Mondays, I CALEDONIAN HOVE Bar250, opens 6pm Connie Conway, bar opens noon for all tastes 7pm, opens 1pm afterwork drink deals 5-8pm, free Nintendo Wii all I CHARLES ST BAR Food: 12-8pm, open noon I CHARLES ST CLUB Ministry of Laughs: I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Back to The day, bar opens noon I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret featuring An audience with Peter, Andrew Watts, & 80s & 90s: DJ Steve Lush, free entry & access all I QUEENS ARMS Skint Unlimited Drinks & beer garden, bar opens noon Lynn Ruth Miller, compared by Mike Belgrave areas, heated smoking area, open 11pm Karaoke hosted by Sam, 8pm bar opens noon I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of £8/£5 cons, doors open 8.45pm showtime 9pm I BRIGHTON TAVERN Pizza & pint niight, iI R-BAR Miss Jason’s Mad House: 10pm, free drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm I 112 CHURCH ST Richards Sunday Roast, Adams homemade flavoured vodkas, open noon pool, Wii zone, bar opens noon I GHETTO Alan The Mentalist hosts Quiz Alicious noon-late secret beer garden, bar opens noon I BULLDOG Marcias Glitter Ball: 70/80s disco, I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm bar 8pm, £1 entry, winner gets all the dosh, followed I DR BRIGHTON’S Cafe Del Mar chill out, outside 10pm-2am, bar opens 11am opens noon by Twisted Karaoke with Cat 10pm, club opens drinking area, bar open 1pm I CHARLES ST BAR Food: noon-8pm, Studio I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am 5.30pm I GHETTO Eurotrash! cheap smut disco, entry £3, 150 warm up, bar opens noon I WHITE HORSE Pool, heated smoking patio, I GROSVENOR Bar opens 5pm from 9pm, club opens 5.30pm I CHARLES ST CLUB Studio 150: Charles St opens noon I KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you I GROSVENOR Chill out Sunday, open 2pm Official Student Fun Night, DJs Luke Smith & Ali K, I ZONE You Say We Play, choose any music you choose the music, bar opens 11am I IRON DUKE Steves Sunday lunch, 1-6pm dancers, theme nights, open 10.30pm want all day & night, bar open 11am I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Miss Jason’s I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, fun 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all Barmy Bingo with bascon sandwich or chips, 5pm quiz, 8pm, secret beer garden, bar opens noon TUESDAY 12 floors, heated smoking area I KINGS ARMS Brighton bear, cub & otter I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: I MARINE TAVERN Quiz with Nat 9pm, entry £1 weekend farewell party, bar opens 11am drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, per person, 50% to charity, 50% to Snowball, bar I LEGENDS Terrace open all day, lounge bar I GHETTO Frat Party!: Togas & wet t-shirtsDJs couples £15, Tuesday social 7pm, heated smokers opens noon 11am-5am Lizzie Drip, 3.15pm heated smoking Pookie, Beast, Fiflicious & Oh-My Neuf from 9pm, patio, Senior Citizens Lunch, 3 courses, half bottle of I MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts noon-6pm area, free access all floors club opens 5.30pm wine and cabaret, £17.50, to book tel. 01273 688825 Drag King & Transvestite Night with (killer) pool & I MARINE TAVERN Elsie’s Packed Lunch, bar I GROSVENOR Bar opens 5pm I ANGEL Bar opens 5pm poker, £2 8pm opens 1pm I IRON DUKE Pop Quiz, 8.30pm, opens 1pm I AQUARIUM Josh Mills music night, an I PV@JURY’S OUT Is it only Tuesday? afterwork I MARLBOROUGH Sunday roasts: noon to I KINGS ARMS Games & chill, play Wii & PS3 invitation to sing, 9pm opens 1pm drinks deals 5-8pm, free nintendo Wii all day, bar finish, Walking Group: roast for you & your dog on screens 4 free, free touchscreen jukebox, bar I BASEMENT CLUB @ LEGENDS Scene Queen: opens noon noon, Clare Project MTFs/FTMs/Gender Queers/ opens 11am DJ Lil’Alex, special drinks deals with student/scene I QUEENS ARMS Skint Unlimited Drinks & Transvestites/partners/friends & family social, £1, I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, Food 12- ID, open 11pm Karaoke: DJ & karaoke night hosted by Betty 6pm, Drag King Quiz 7pm 5pm lounge bar 11am-5am, free all floors I BRIGHTON TAVERN Games Galore in the Swollocks 8pm, bar opens noon I PV@JURY’S OUT Sunday roast noon till I MARINE TAVERN Monday club with Lawrence, evening, opens noon I R-BAR Get ready for Revenge, DJ Simone, free finished, free Wii after 5pm bar opens noon bar opens noon pool & Wii zone, bar opens noon
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton
32 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT PICS FROM ELECTRONIC DISCO + DR BRIGHTONS + GROSVENOR
MAY LISTINGS
ELECTRONIC DISCO DR BRIGHTONS I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Underground clubbing with an eye on entertaining this is one I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Miss Masters plays live every Fri from 9pm and Tony B plays morning appointment you need to keep. Every day the Electronic Disco DJs: Queen vocal, funky house every Sat at 9pm to get you ready to party with free shots galore all Josephine, Kate Wildblood, Mike Mikalis, Drew Palmer and Miss Masters thank the night. I Every Sunday, DBs recreates Ibiza on Brighton seafront with a Café Del Mar chill grooves that be, that they get to play the music they love for a living. Feel the summer, feel out. I Mon-Fri free game of pool with each round of drinks bought. I Open Mon–Thurs the sparkle, feel the love! Expect plenty of groove heavy, funked up house with disco 1pm–11.30pm: Fri–Sat 1pm–2am: Sunday 1pm–11pm. tendencies and shake arse bass. Electronic Disco intends to put the animal in you back on to the dancefloor. Special guest DJ Ben Jamin.Putting the uplift back into clubbing – without the stacked heels! Electronic Disco After Hours @ The Funky Buddha Lounge, I GHETTO Sacrilege, the new Religion for FRIDAY 15 Brighton, DJs Jon Byrne & Ms Masters! £3 from Sat Night / Sun Morning 24, 3am till dawn, £5 entry / discount passes from SugaQube I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-5am, restaurant: 10pm, club opens 5.30pm who are hosting the pre party from 9pm-3am upstairs at the Qube. 2 For 1 cocktails till 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-5am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I GROSVENOR Bar opens 5pm 10pm. For discount passes to Funky Buddah ask behind the bar. couples £15, smokers patio, pre-club drinks, I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Best karaoke on Weekend start, Late night bar 1am-5am the south coast, 9pm I ANGEL Cabaret: Trudi Styles, divatastic I KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you showcase 9pm, bar opens 5pm I REVENGE Sound As A Pound, Top DJs play an I MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts, noon- choose the music, bar opens 11am eclectic collection of 80s, 90s, 00s, electro pop, 6pm Unique LGBTQU darts for all levels with I AQUARIUM Vocal talents of Janet December I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- dance, cheese. You can win the door money, entry surprise, £2 8pm from 9.30pm bar opens 1pm 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Celebration: £1, opens 10.30am I PV@JURY’S OUT Infamous Quiz night with I floors, heated smoking area hosted by Dolly Rocket, DJ Peter Castle plays girly I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm bar real prizes 8pm, bar opens noon I MARINE TAVERN Gareths fun nite, open noon pop, disco & handbag, free, access all areas, opens noon I QUEENS ARMS Anything Goes! DJ Kamp I MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts noon-6pm smoking area, open 11pm I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am Kevin, karaoke, bingo, music & quiz, open noon Open mic: sing, play, tell a joke or listen 9pm BRIGHTON TAVERN Weekend Starts Here! I WHITE HORSE Food noon-5pm, pool, heated I R-BAR Get ready for Revenge, free pool/Wii I I PV@JURY’S OUT Pop Vixens, Pre Girls On Party night open till 2am, bar opens noon smoking patio, opens noon zone, bar open noon Top, free Revenge tickets, bar opens noon ZONE James’ big money quiz 8pm, open 11am REVENGE Guilty: DJ Lil Alex, funky electro I BULLDOG 63 Hour Long Weekend: main bar: I I I QUEENS ARMS Skint: Unlimited Drinks & beats for bad boys & girls, free b4 12am/£2 after, DJ Marcia 10pm-2am, top bar: Karaoke hosted by WEDNESDAY 13 Karaoke, 8pm-11pm, & karaoke with Betty, bar Guy 10pm-3am, bar opens 11am free NUS, open 11pm opens noon AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-1am, Restaurant: STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm bar I CALEDONIAN Karaoke 9.30pm open 6pm I I I R-BAR Girls On Top warm up party: DJ Verity 11am-8pm, Sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, opens noon I CHARLES ST BAR open noon, food noon- 8pm-12pm, free Revenge passes, free pool 8pm,Fairylee: pure cheese DJ Ruby Roo & Connie couples £15, Student midweek karaoke + special I VAVOOM Karaoke 10-late Late bar till 6am upstairs, free Wii zone, bar opens noon Conway, hosted Joan Bond 9pm drinks deals 8pm, heated smokers patio I WHITE HORSE Food noon-5pm, smoking I REVENGE Girls On Top Level 1: with DJs CHARLES ST CLUB Curiosity Lite: DJs Ali & I ANGEL Open mic night, 9pm, bar open 5pm patio, open noon I Smiffy & Lady Bex playing chart/pop/trash/r’n’b. Ruby Roo play trashy/disco/pop, hosted by Connie I AQUARIUM Piano Bar with JB, music for all I ZONE Karaoke Mis Stake! 8.30pm open 11am Level 2: with DJ Dulcie & Richard Jones playing tastes 7pm, opens 1pm Conway, £2, club opens 10.30pm funky, vocal, house, £4/£3 NUS, free passes from 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, cabaret I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Gabbi’s Dirty THURSDAY 14 I R-Bar & PV, opens 10.30pm corner with Maisie Trollette 9pm, secret beer Handbag: DJ Gabbi plays, dirty handbag & house, I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm, Quiz of garden, bar opens noon free, access all floors, smoking area, open 11pm 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, the week, Trivia galore! 9pm, free sarnies at half I DR BRIGHTON’S Ms Masters plays funky house I BRIGHTON TAVERN Wine Club, open noon couples £15, smokers patio, Relax & unwind time, bar opens noon BULLDOG Red Light Rush: cheap drinks when ANGEL Ophelia Misfortune Clairvoyant evening, from 9pm, bar opens 1pm I I I TOM’S@G LOUNGE Leather/Fetish bar with select artist plays 8pm-1am, open 11am 9pm bar opens, 5pm I GHETTO Popstarz: indie anthems, alternative dance area, free, go to www.tom-s.co.uk classics, DJs Pookie, Beast, Tommy & Dynamite I CALEDONIAN Bar250, opens 6pm I AQUARIUM Who Dares Sings open mic with I VAVOOM Upstairs VIP lounge, Late bar till 6am Sal, free b4 11pm then £3, club opens 5.30pm I CHARLES ST BAR Food: 12-8pm, open noon Josh Mills, 9pm opens 1pm WHITE HORSE Food: noon-5pm, pool, heated I I GROSVENOR Weekend starts here! open 5pm I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Boys Below: smoking patio, opens noon beer garden, bar opens noon men only night, DJ Phill Marriott (Q Radio) plays I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Boogie Nights, I ZONE Comedy Film Zone, opens 11am live DJ plays old classics I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of commercial house with a progressive edge, top drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm stripper, free entry, access all floors, smoking area, I GHETTO Transition: Goth/metal/punk nite, DJ open 11pm Peter Von Sleaze, £2.50 from 10pm, open 5.30pm I BRIGHTON TAVERN Barmy Bingo with Fi for www.myspace.com/brightontransition Sussex Beacon, 8.30pm opens noon I GROSVENOR Keeping Woolies Alive bring your I BULLDOG top bar: Belong with DJ Grant 10pm- ipod & play your own tunes Pick ‘n’ Mix, opens 5pm late, bar opens 11am I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Student night I CALEDONIAN HOVE Bar250, opens 6pm I KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you I CHARLES ST BAR & CLUB Food noon-8pm, choose the music, bar opens 11am Mad Cow XL: hosted by Ms Bond, DJ Lil Alex & I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- LeeRoy downstairs 8pm, upstairs 10pm, entry £1 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all to good causes, bar opens noon floors, heated smoking area, Gabbi’s fun & frolicks I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret party night, 9pm beer garden, bar opens noon I MARINE TAVERN Dale’s Midweek Mayhem, I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of bar opens noon drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm DENMARK SAUNA GROSVENOR The Denmark Sauna is Brighton’s leading ALL MALE sauna! Open daily from I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Fri (1) is women only night from 8pm. I Every Wed help 12am–10pm with a video room, rest rooms, tanning booth, café lounge and members Keep Woolies Alive, take your own ipod along and play your own tunes at PICK ‘N’ MIX. only offers of £99 for 10 visits, full day entry £13 and massage for £30 per hour. The Doors open at 5pm. I Happy hours are Mon–Thurs from 5–7pm. I Open Mon–Fri Denmark is discreetly located close to Hove Station, 01273 723733. Regularly updated 5pm-late, Sat and Sun 2pm–late. Open at 2pm each Bank Holiday Mon (4 & 25). website: www.denmarksauna.com Closed from 6pm on Sun 24 for a private party. www.thegrosvenorbar.com
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton **ALL DAY ALL NIGHT SOURZ SAMBUCA £1.50 **ALL NIGHT MON+THURS SOURZ £1 MAY SPECIALS **EVERY DAY TILL 9PM ALL NIGHT MON+THUR VODKA (SGL) PINT BECKS £2 VODKA (DBL) **EXCL SPECIAL EVENTS £3.50 UPSTAIRS LOUNGE WED: KARAOKE 10–LATE FRI: KARAOKE 10–LATE+PARTY MUSIC SAT: LOUNGE ALL NIGHT +CHART/DANCE MUSIC AVAILABLE FOR PRIVATE FUNCTIONS/PARTIES ETC SATURDAY THEME PARTIES 23RD MAY 2ND: BANK HOLIDAY PARTY A BIG 9TH: SUPER STARS 16TH: FARM BOYZ THANKTO ALL OUR YOU 23RD: VAVOOM 5TH BIRTHDAY FRIENDS WHO 30TH: BEACH BOYZ VISIT US SO MUCH! ROOMS FROM £30/NIGHT 5TH BIRTHDAY PARTY WITH BETTY SWOLLOCKS STREET ENTERTAINERS DANCE BOYZ IN THE BAR FREE BUFFET LATER CELEBRATION DRINKS + SPECIAL BIRTHDAY CAKE! 34 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT PICS FROM G-LOUNGE + FIT LADZ + LEGENDS BAR
MAY LISTINGS
LEGENDS BAR I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Gabbi has re-jigged her Wed residency at Legends. Her style is chaotic to say the least. Expect some crazy mad fun. There’s games, quizzes, karaoke and loads of crap prizes. She will also be giving away drinks and shots, it all depend on how generous she is feeling. When she finishes she moves downstairs to the Basement Club for Gabbi’s Fun & Frolics. I Sunday cabaret at 3.15pm includes Mandy Gap (3), Lizzy Drip (10), Pitt Sisters (17) Amber Dexterous (24) and Lady Imelda (31). I Monday bank holiday cabaret on (4 & 25) features Maisie Trollette and Josh Mills. I This month drinks promotion is a bottle of Sol for £2.50 on Mon–Thur till 8pm. I Open every day from 11am–5am and food is served from noon-6pm. www.legendsbrighton.com
I BRIGHTON TAVERN Eurovision Party, free euro Aquarius, 8.30pm, bar opens noon snacks, 7.30pm opens 11am I QUEENS ARMS Cabaret: Betty Swollocks, 4pm GLOUNGE I BULLDOG 63 Hour Weekend: main bar: VJ Eurovision Song Contest live, hosted by Spice, 8pm John 10pm-3am, top bar: karaoke with Micky, bar opens noon I ONE FOR THE DIARY: SWINGING SALAMI SHOWCASE SPECTACULAR! launch party on Sunday (17) is hosted by Boogaloo Stu and Fake Bush - prepare to be dazzled 10pm-3am, bar open 24 hrs I R-BAR Kinky Classics, DJ Hollie 8pm- CALEDONIAN Piano bar hosted by Roberta midnight, free pool upstairs, Wii zone, discount by this weekly theatrical extravaganza featuring a tremendous line-up of showbiz darlings I Slack, 9.30pm open 6pm Revenge tickets, night menu midnight-7am (241 ranging from the weird and the wonderful, and from the sublime to the ridiculous, of the I CHARLES ST BAR Food: 12-8pm open 12 vouchers), bar opens noon following cabaret lovelies, who will you be greeted by as you step into G Lounge this week? I CHARLES ST CLUB Transister for tasty I REVENGE Kinky Dangerous! level 1 Kinky Pop: Le Gateau Chocolat, Boogaloo Stu, Fake Bush, Captain Kidd, Miss Dolly Rocket, trannies, gorgeous gay guys, delicious dykes & DJ Stu & Smiffy, play pop/chart, level 2 Dangerous Team Mud! and the Sparklemotion Showponies. Fun starts from 8pm, show starts at inbetweenies, DJ Dave, DJ Destiny & Madhatter mix House: DJ Dulcie & guests play, funky chunky, 9pm. I FITLADZ returns to Brighton for two events on bank holiday weekends, Sat (2) a variety of unpredictable tunes, open 11pm vocal house, free b4 11, £5 b4 12, £7 b4 3am, £3 Bonk Holiday special and Sat (23) Bonk Holiday Sports Kit ‘n’ Shorts Party. DJ I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret after and NUS all night, £3 passes available from R- Devilish, Alessandro and Jon Byrne will get the ladz ready for some hot action. Need we beer garden, bar opens noon Bar, open 10.30pm say more. The buzz from the first party in April was hot. Don’t miss out on the re-match. I DR BRIGHTON’S DJ Tony B 9.30pm, opens 1pm I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open, 12-3pm, Great GHETTO Wigout: seriously unserious pop night tunes to drink & shake to 9pm, open noon Entry is £6 with flyer/advert/members otherwise £8. Discount wrist bands available for I with Fifilicious, Kitty & Boogaloo Stu, free b4 I VAVOOM Farm Boyz Theme Party, Upstairs VIP Wild Fruit and Rebel. 11pm, then £4/£3NUS, club opens 5.30pm lounge, chart/dance music, late bar till 6am I GROSVENOR Grosvenor Groove, open 2pm I WHITE HORSE Food: Noon-5pm, Pool, heated JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Cabaret: Connie smoking patio, opens noon I KINGS ARMS Official launch party weekend, I STAR INN Paulas Kitchen open 12-3pm, Big I free buffet, giveaways, guest DJs, bar open 11am Maria’s Fun Friday 8pm, bar opens noon Conway, 9pm I ZONE Miss Hap 9.30pm, bar open 11am LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- VAVOOM Karaoke in upstairs lounge 10pm- I KINGS ARMS Official launch party weekend, I I SUNDAY 17 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, Pre Celebration late, Late bar till 6am free buffet, giveaways, guest DJs, bar open 11am LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- AMSTERDAM Open 11am-5am, Sunday lunch hosted by Dolly Rocket, outside smoking area, free I WHITE HORSE Food: noon-5pm, heated I I access all floors smoking patio, open noon 5pm, lounge opens 11am-5am, Pre Ignition from noon-5.30pm, Connies karaoke 8pm- 10.30pm, 7pm, heated smoking area, free entry to Basement sauna 2pm-4am £5 B4 7pm, £10 after, couples I MARINE TAVERN Tight Squeeze with Nat & I ZONE Cabaret TBC, 9.30pm bar open 11am Dale, bar opens noon Club, access all floors £15, heated smokers patio. Late bar 1am-5am MARINE TAVERN It’s Saturday let’s party! b4 ANGEL Chill Out! kick back & relax, opens 2pm I MARLBOROUGH Girls Night Out, guest DJs, live SATURDAY 16 I I clubbing, bar open noon AQUARIUM Brighton & Hove (actually) gay music, 8pm I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-5am, Restaurant: I MARLBOROUGH Lets Party! downstairs, 8pm Men’s Chorus 5.30pm followed by karaoke I PV Thank Funk It’s Friday, bar opens noon 11am-8pm, sauna 2pm-5am, £5 B4 7pm £10 I PV@JURY’S OUT Viva La Divas goes Country showtime, opens 1pm I QUEENS ARMS Camp Attack: DJ Andy B 9pm after, £15 couple, smokers patio, Sun Downers! I text requests on 07946 792444 bar opens noon Beach music & cocktails on terrace 7pm Late night live music with Em & Rob 5pm Booty Call with DJ I R-BAR Tops & Bottoms: order drinks, toss a bar 1am-5am coin, winner gets same round for free, DJ Smiffy I ANGEL Eurovision Party hosted by Violet Venim, from 8pm, Wii Zone, free pool upstairs, food (241 7pm bar opens 5pm JACK HORNER vouchers available) midnight-7am, discount AQUARIUM Euro Trash Night watch Eurovision I I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Miss Jason returns every Sun at 5pm with BARMY BINGO. passes for Revenge, bar opens noon Song Contest live 8pm, bar opens 1pm Karaoke Have a bacon sandwich or some chips. I Wed is student night with stripper College Boy I REVENGE Level 1: Lollipop: 70s-00s, DJ Workshop 10am-1pm contact Ben on 01273 Stewart T plays top pop with the Lollipop girls, 605525 (6). £1 off all pints and you get a free school yard shooter with every round. I The best karaoke on the South Coast Thur at 9pm. Cabaret every Sat at 9pm, Lady La Rue Level 2: Altitude, DJ Alex Baker (Gaydar Radio) I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Ignition: DJ I plays dance & remixes, free b4 11, £5 after, £3 Peter Castle, free entry & access all areas, heated (2), Maisie Trollette (9) and Connie Conway (16). Fri is Boogie Night with DJ playing after 3am, £3 NUS all night, open 10.30pm smoking area, club opens 11pm your favourite classics and £100 worth of drink vouchers to be given away!
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton PICS FROM LEGENDS, BASEMENT CLUB @ LEGENDS + MARINE TAVERN GSCENE OUT & ABOUT 35
MAY LISTINGS
MARINE TAVERN I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Every Tue Nat hosts the quiz night at 9pm. Entry is £1 per person with 50p going to charity and 50p into the snowball pot. I Elsie hosts Sun, Laurence hosts Mon, Dale hosts Wed, Gareth hosts Thur. Nat and Dale host Fri & Sat. I Open from noon–midnight, Mon–Sat: and 1pm–midnight on Sun. On the two bank holiday weekend in May (Fri 1–Mon 4 & Fri 22–Mon 25) the bar remains open till 2am on Fri, Sat & Mon & 1am on Sun.
5.30pm, then Betty’s karaoke, bar opens noon I R-BAR Miss Jason’s Mad House: 10pm, free I R-BAR Sublime Sundays, roasts till 7pm, pool, Wii zone, bar opens noon acoustic session with Amy Stephens, 5pm, Miss I STAR INN Paulas kitchen 12-3pm opens noon Jason’s Barmy Bingo 8.30pm, free pool upstairs, I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am Wii zone, bar opens noon I WHITE HORSE Pool, heated smoking patio, BASEMENT CLUB @ LEGENDS I STAR INN Mega Sunday lunch from Paulas opens noon kitchen 12-4pm, Supersize free buffet 6pm, bar I ZONE You Say We Play, choose any music you I FREE ENTRY to the Basement Club every night of the week! opens noon want all day & night, bar open 11am I ONE FOR THE DIARY: There’s more mean men at BOYS BELOW every Thurs this I SUNDAY SUNDAE@AUDIO Alfresco Flirt Fest, month with strippers including the legendary College Boy, Danny Valentino and Kane free BBQ 6pm-8pm, DJs on Rotation Kate TUESDAY 19 appearing weekly. DJ Phil Marriot, the new man at Gaydar Radio is the resident DJ Wildblood, Jon Byrne, Richard Jones, Diablo, Miss I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: playing a special mix of commercial house. I Gabbi has a dirty secret in her handbag and Masters, Mike Mikalis & Brian Cheetham, £3 b4 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, she’s going to unleash it every Wed night. Experience Gabbi’s Fun & Frolicks where she 7pm, £4 b4 8pm then £5, 6pm-late couples £15, Tuesday social 7pm, heated patio VAVOOM Late bar till 6am ANGEL Bar opens 5pm will be playing dirty handbag and house tunes. I BACK TO THE 80S with Steve Lush is I I every Mon. SCENE QUEEN with Lil Alex is every Tue. CELEBRATION hosted by I WHITE HORSE Sunday roast noon-5pm, pool, I AQUARIUM Josh Mills music night, an I I smoking patio, opens noon invitation to sing, 9pm opens 1pm Dolly Rocket is every Fri. I IGNITION with Peter Castle is every Sat. I DJ/producer I ZONE Karaoke 6.30pm, bar open 11am I BASEMENT CLUB @ LEGENDS Scene Queen: Ross Alexander (Northern Beat) creates a unique sound remixing the best in pop and DJ Lil’Alex, special drinks deals with student/scene disco at FEVER every Sun. Ross has worked at clubs across the UK with residencies at MONDAY 18 ID, open 11pm Flamingos (Blackpool) and NG1 (Nottingham). I Selected drinks are £2 all night on I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: I BRIGHTON TAVERN Games Galore in the Sun–Thurs and at SCENE QUEEN every Tue ALL drinks are £2 for scene queens (other 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, evening, opens noon venues staff with proof of employment) and students with ID. couples £15, Big Quiz hosted by Nick with great I BULLDOG Bully Boyz men only top bar, prizes, £1 entry, 7pm, heated smokers patio members only 10pm-2am, bar opens 11am I ANGEL Available for private hire I CALEDONIAN HOVE Bar250, opens 6pm I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Fever: Chocolat, Captain Kidd, Team Mud The Sparklemotion I AQUARIUM Piano Bar with J.B playing music I CHARLES ST BAR Food: 12-8pm, open noon DJ/producer Ross Alexander (Anthem/Northern Showponies, fun starts 8pm, show starts 9pm for all tastes 7pm opens 1pm I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret Beat), free entry, access all areas, heated smoking I GROSVENOR Chill Out Sunday, opens 2pm I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Back to The beer garden, bar opens noon area, open 11pm I IRON DUKE Steves Sunday lunch, 1-6pm 80s & 90s: DJ Steve Lush, free entry & access all I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of I BRIGHTON TAVERN Recovery Sunday, candle- I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Miss Jason’s areas, heated smoking area, open 11pm drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm let chillout session 8pm bar open noon Barmy Bingo with bascon sandwich or chips, 5pm I BRIGHTON TAVERN Pizza & pint niight, Adams I GHETTO Alan The Mentalist hosts Quiz Alicious I BULLDOG 63 Hour weekend: main bar DJ I KINGS ARMS Cruz & booze with guest DJ, homemade flavoured vodkas, open noon 8pm, £1 entry, winner gets all the dosh; Twisted Grant 5pm-10pm, DJ Wayne 10pm-2am; top bar: 7pm, bar open 11am I BULLDOG Marcias Glitter Ball: 70/80s disco, Karaoke with Cat 10pm, club opens 5.30pm Karaoke, Micky 10-2am, bar open 11am I LEGENDS Terrace open all day, lounge bar 10pm-2am, bar opens 11am I GROSVENOR Bar opens 5pm I CHARLES ST BAR Sunday Lunches noon- 11am-5am Pitt Sisters, 3.15pm heated smoking I CHARLES ST BAR Food: noon-8pm, Studio I KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you 7.15pm, cabaret: Sandra at 7.15pm, hosted by area, free access all floors 150 warm up, bar opens noon choose the music, bar opens 11am Connie Conway, bar opens noon I MARINE TAVERN Elsie’s Packed Lunch, bar I CHARLES ST CLUB Studio 150: Charles St I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- I 112 CHURCH ST Richards Sunday Roast, opens 1pm Official Student Fun Night, DJs Luke Smith & Ali K, 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all noon-late secret beer garden, bar opens noon I MARLBOROUGH Sunday roasts: noon to dancers, theme nights, open 10.30pm floors, heated smoking area I DR BRIGHTON’S Cafe Del Mar chill out, outside finish, Walking Group: roast for you & your dog I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, fun I MARINE TAVERN Quiz with Nat 9pm, entry £1 drinking area, bar open 1pm noon, Clare Project MTFs/FTMs/Gender Queers/ quiz, 8pm, secret beer garden, bar opens noon pp, 50% to charity, 50% to Snowball,opens noon I GHETTO BRIGHTON Sirens Fairy Tale, Transvestites/partners/friends & family social, £1, I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of I MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts noon-6pm burlesque & pole dancing nite, £5/£3.50 from 6pm, Drag King Quiz 7pm drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm Drag King & Transvestite Night with (killer) pool & 9pm, club opens 5.30pm I PV@JURY’S OUT Sunday roast noon till I GHETTO Frat Party!: DJs Pookie, Beast, poker, £2 8pm I GLOUNGE Swinging Salami Sunday Spectacular finished, free Wii after 5pm bar opens noon Fiflicious & Oh-My Neuf, 9pm, club opens 5.30 I PV@JURY’S OUT Is it only Tuesday? afterwork hosted by Boogaloo Stu + Fake Bush with Gateau I QUEENS ARMS Cabaret: Drag with no name I GROSVENOR Bar opens 5pm drinks deals 5-8pm, free nintendo Wii all day, bar I IRON DUKE Pop Quiz, 8.30pm bar open 1pm opens noon I KINGS ARMS Games & chill, play Wii & PS3 I QUEENS ARMS Skint: unlimited drinks, DJ & KINGS ARMS on screens 4 free, free touchscreen jukebox, bar karaoke with Betty Swollocks 8pm, opens noon opens 11am R-BAR Get ready for Revenge, DJ Simone, free I ONE FOR THE DIARY: The official launch party weekend extravanga with special I guest DJs, free buffet and giveaways is on Fri (15) and Sat (16). Charlie and Mick I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, Food 12- pool & Wii zone, bar opens noon I 5pm lounge bar 11am-5am, free all floors REVENGE Sound As A Pound, Top DJs play an open the doors on their new bar on Fri (1) at 5pm. There’s a Brighton Bear, Cub & Otter I I MARINE TAVERN Monday club with Lawrence, eclectic collection of 80s, 90s, 00s, electro pop, weekender from Fri (8) to Sun (10). DJ Boozy Bear plays 80s/90s pop on Fri and DJ bar opens noon dance, cheese. You can win the door money, entry Charlie plays funky house & pop remixes on Sat. Wave goodbye to the visiting bears on I MARLBOROUGH Free darts & pool noon-6pm £1, opens 10.30am Sun afternoon. I Mon–Thurs you can choose any music from the free touch screen Trans, queer and friends/family/partners night I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm bar jukebox and every Mon play Wii & PS3 games for free on the big screen. I The Kings “Performance” on cinema screen, £3 opens noon Arms is the pre club bar for the new men only night Gladiator at Charles Street on Sat (2). I PV@JURY’S OUT I Don’t Like Mondays, I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am afterwork drink deals 5-8pm, free Nintendo Wii all I Sun (31) is leather and rubber night from 9pm. Strict dress code applies and there are I WHITE HORSE Food noon-5pm, pool, heated changing facilities. Open Mon-Thurs 11am-midnight, Fri-Sun 11am-3am. day, bar opens noon smoking patio, opens noon I QUEENS ARMS Skint Unlimited Drinks & www.kingsarmsbrighton.co.uk I I ZONE James’ big money quiz night 8pm, bar Karaoke hosted by Sam, 8pm bar opens noon open 11am
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 36 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT PICS FROM PV + QUEENS ARMS
MAY LISTINGS
PV @ JURY’S OUT I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Viva La Divas + Booty Call goes country on Sat (16) followed by DJ Aquarius at 8.30pm. I Infamous PV quiz every Wednesday at 8pm is the busiest quiz in the village. I Viva La Divas present live music on Saturdays at 6pm with Chelle (2), Em & Rob (16), Carly Bryant (23) and Em (30). I Every Thursday is Pop Vixens, pre Girls on Top Party. Everything from Pink to Britney. Free tickets for Revenge and shots at £2. I Sunday lunch is first class and has a Gscene recommendation.
WEDNESDAY 20 I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Boys Below: I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-1am, Restaurant: men only night, DJ Phill Marriott (Q Radio) plays 11am-8pm, Sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, commercial house with a progressive edge, top couples £15, Student midweek karaoke + special stripper, free entry, access all floors, smoking area, drinks deals 8pm, heated smokers patio open 11pm I ANGEL Winging It!, Stand Up Comedy Night, I BRIGHTON TAVERN Barmy Bingo with Fi for QUEENS ARMS 8.30pm bar opens 5pm Sussex Beacon 8.30pm, opens noon I ONE FOR THE DIARY: The EUROVISION SONG CONTEST is being shown live at the QA I AQUARIUM Piano Bar with JB, music for all I BULLDOG top bar: Belong with DJ Grant 10pm- tastes 7pm, opens 1pm late, bar opens 11am on Sat (16) starting at 7pm, hosted by Spice. DJ Kamp Kevin continues the party into the small hours. CABARET on Sat at 4pm features Chrissie du Cann (2), Cherry Poppin I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Gabbi’s Dirty I CALEDONIAN HOVE Bar250, opens 6pm I Handbag: DJ Gabbi plays, dirty handbag & house, I CHARLES ST BAR & CLUB Food noon-8pm, (9), Betty Swollocks (16), Miss Hap (23) and Quinton Smith (30). I CABARET on Sun free, access all floors, smoking area, open 11pm Mad Cow XL: hosted by Ms Bond, DJ Lil Alex & at 5.30pm features Davina Sparkle (3), Tiffaney Wells (10), Drag with no name (17) I BRIGHTON TAVERN Wine Club, open noon LeeRoy downstairs 8pm, upstairs 10pm, entry £1 to Kitty Litter (24) and Sandra (31). Cabaret is followed by Betty’s Karaoke Show. I Every I BULLDOG Red Light Rush: cheap drinks when good causes, bar opens noon Tue and Thur at SKINT you can purchase for £10.99 unlimited drink wristband deals for select artist plays 8pm-1am, open 11am I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret drinks from 8pm–11pm. After 11pm selected drinks are £2. Brighton’s original CAMP beer garden, bar opens noon I I CALEDONIAN Bar250, opens 6pm ATTACK continues every Fri text Andy on 07946 792444 with your requests. I CHARLES ST BAR Food: 12-8pm, open noon I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm beer garden, bar opens noon I GHETTO Sacrilege, the new Religion for ANGEL Cabaret: Trudi Styles, divatastic QUEENS ARMS Camp Attack: DJ Andy B 9pm DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of Brighton, DJs Jon Byrne & Ms Masters! £3 from I I I showcase 9pm, bar opens 5pm text requests on 07946 792444 bar opens noon drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm 10pm, club opens 5.30pm AQUARIUM Vocal talents of Janet December R-BAR Tops & Bottoms: order drinks, toss a GHETTO Transition: Goth/metal/punk nite, DJ I GROSVENOR Bar opens 5pm I I I from 9.30pm bar opens 1pm coin, winner gets same round for free, DJ Smiffy Peter Von Sleaze, £2.50 from 10pm, open 5.30pm I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Best karaoke on BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Celebration: from 8pm, Wii Zone, free pool upstairs, food (241 www.myspace.com/brightontransition the south coast, 9pm I hosted by Dolly Rocket, DJ Peter Castle plays girly vouchers available) midnight-7am, discount GROSVENOR Keep Woolies Alive bring your ipod I KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you I pop, disco & handbag, free, access all areas, passes for Revenge, bar opens noon & play your own tunes in Pick ‘n’ Mix, opens 5pm choose the music, bar opens 11am smoking area, open 11pm REVENGE Level 1: Lollipop: 70s-00s, DJ JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Student night I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- I I BRIGHTON TAVERN Weekend Starts Here! Stewart T plays top pop with the Lollipop girls, KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all I I Party night open till 2am, bar opens noon Level 2: Altitude, DJ Alex Baker (Gaydar Radio) choose the music, bar opens 11am floors, heated smoking area BULLDOG 87 Hour Long Weekend: main bar: plays dance & remixes, free b4 11, £5 after, £3 LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- I MARINE TAVERN Gareths fun nite, open noon I I DJ Marcia 10pm-2am, top bar: Karaoke hosted by after 3am, £3 NUS all night, open 10.30pm 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all I MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts noon-6pm Guy 10pm-3am, bar opens 11am STAR INN Paulas Kitchen open 12-3pm, Big floors, heated smoking area, Gabbi’s fun & frolicks Open mic: sing, play, tell a joke or listen 9pm I CALEDONIAN Karaoke 9.30pm open 6pm Maria’s Fun Friday 8pm, bar opens noon party night, 9pm I PV@JURY’S OUT Pop Vixens, Pre Girls On I CHARLES ST BAR open noon, food noon- VAVOOM Karaoke in upstairs lounge 10pm- MARINE TAVERN Dale’s Midweek Mayhem, Top, free Revenge tickets, bar opens noon I I I 8pm,Fairylee: pure cheese DJ Ruby Roo & Connie late, Late bar till 6am bar opens noon I QUEENS ARMS Skint: Unlimited Drinks & Conway, hosted Joan Bond 9pm WHITE HORSE Food: noon-5pm, heated MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts, noon-6pm Karaoke, 8pm-11pm, & karaoke with Betty, bar I I CHARLES ST CLUB Curiosity Lite: DJs Ali & smoking patio, open noon Unique LGBTQU darts for all levels with surprise, opens noon I Ruby Roo play trashy/disco/pop, hosted by Connie ZONE Little Zoe, 9.30pm bar open 11am £2 8pm I R-BAR Girls On Top warm up party: DJ Verity I Conway, £2, club opens 10.30pm PV@JURY’S OUT Infamous Quiz night with 8pm-12pm, free Revenge passes, free pool I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, cabaret SATURDAY 23 real prizes 8pm, bar opens noon upstairs, free Wii zone, bar opens noon I corner with Miss Jason 9pm, secret beer garden, AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-5am, Restaurant: QUEENS ARMS Anything Goes! DJ Kamp I REVENGE Girls On Top Level 1: with DJs I I bar opens noon 11am-8pm, sauna 2pm-5am, £5 B4 7pm £10 Kevin, karaoke, bingo, music & quiz, open noon Smiffy & Lady Bex playing chart/pop/trash/r’n’b. DR BRIGHTON’S Ms Masters plays funky house after, £15 couple, smokers patio, Sun Downers! R-BAR Get ready for Revenge, free pool/Wii Level 2: with DJ Dulcie & Richard Jones playing I I from 9pm, bar opens 1pm Beach music & cocktails on terrace 7pm Late night zone, bar open noon funky, vocal, house, £4/£3 NUS, free passes from GHETTO Popstarz: indie anthems, alternative bar 1am-5am REVENGE Guilty: DJ Lil Alex, funky electro R-Bar & PV, opens 10.30pm I I classics, DJs Pookie, Beast, Tommy & Dynamite ANGEL Alan Bonner & band & support from beats for bad boys & girls, free b4 12am/£2 after, I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm, Quiz of I Sal, free b4 11pm then £3, club opens 5.30pm Amity, 8pm bar open 5pm free NUS, open 11pm the week, Trivia galore! 9pm, free sarnies at half GROSVENOR Weekend starts here! open 5pm AQUARIUM Two Landlord’s Karaoke 9pm, STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm bar time, bar opens noon I I I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Boogie Nights, opens 1pm opens noon I TOM’S@G LOUNGE Leather/Fetish bar with I live DJ plays old classics BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Ignition: DJ VAVOOM Karaoke 10-late Late bar till 6am dance area, free, go to www.tom-s.co.uk I I KINGS ARMS Spring bank holiday booze & cruz Peter Castle, free entry & access all areas, heated WHITE HORSE Food noon-5pm, smoking I VAVOOM Upstairs lVIP lounge, Late bar till 6am I I with DJ Boozy Bear, 10pm bar opens 11am smoking area, club opens 11pm patio, open noon I WHITE HORSE Food: noon-5pm, pool, heated LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- BRIGHTON TAVERN Hooray for Saturday Party ZONE Karaoke Mis Stake! 8.30pm open 11am smoking patio, opens noon I I I 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, Pre Celebration Night open till 2am, bar opens 11am I ZONE Comedy Film Zone, opens 11am THURSDAY 21 hosted by Dolly Rocket, outside smoking area, free I BULLDOG 87 Hour Weekend: main bar: VJ access all floors John 10pm-3am, top bar: karaoke with Micky, AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: FRIDAY 22 I MARINE TAVERN Tight Squeeze with Nat & 10pm-3am, bar open 24 hrs 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-5am, restaurant: I Dale, bar opens noon - 2am CALEDONIAN Piano bar hosted by Roberta couples £15, smokers patio, Relax & unwind 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-5am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I MARLBOROUGH Girls Night Out, guest DJs, live Slack, 9.30pm open 6pm ANGEL Cocktail night, bar opens, 5pm couples £15, smokers patio, pre-club drinks, I I music, 8pm CHARLES ST BAR food: 12-8pm open noon AQUARIUM Who Dares Sings open mic with Josh Weekend start, Late night bar 1am-5am I I PV Thank Funk It’s Friday, bar opens noon Mills 9pm, opens 1pm I www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE OUT & ABOUT 37
THE PRE CLUB PUB IS BACK!
G Midweek free game of pool with every round of drinks 1–7pm G Enjoy our new outside area
G MISS MASTERS on the decks every FRIDAY from 9.30pm G TONY B on the decks every SATURDAY
Brighton’s T HE Friendliest Pub!
BRIGHTON 99 Gloucester Road Brighton TAVERN Tel (01273) 680365 It’s official! Brighton's Best Bar Man can be found at The Brighton Tavern! Thank you to everyone who voted for the lovely Matt in the recent Golden Handbag Awards
Monday Thursday Pizza and pint night Camp prize bingo in aid of The Sussex Beacon Tuesday Games evening, everything Friday & Saturday from chess to kerplunk! BT party nights open until 2AM Wednesday Wine club, great offers Sunday and free tasters of a fabulous recovery Sundays selection of wines followed by candlelit chill out
Saturday 16th May The campest TV event of the year will be screened during the BT's Annual Eurovision Party! Free Euro snacks and potent Euro Shots served by your Euro bar-staff
The courtyard garden is now open, a great place for an alfresco drink. Bar hire is FREE for private parties/meetings.
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 38 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT PICS FROM R BAR + REVENGE
MAY LISTINGS
REVENGE I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Two big occasions at Revenge for the May bank holiday weekends: Sat (2), international DJs the SHARP BOYS are making a rare appearance in Brighton and on Sat (23), superstar DJ and producer BIMBO JONES is making an exclusive appearance. Entry for both events is free b4 11pm, £5 b4 12am, £7 b4 3am, £3 after & NUS all night. £3 Revenge passes available from R Bar for both events. For the Freemasons last month, Revenge was packed to the rafter so get there early! I New every Tue, is SOUND AS A POUND. Electro pop, cheesy dance, £1 entry and you get the chance to win all the door money. Selected drinks are just £1 I GUILTY every Wed see DJ Lil Alex playing big funky electro house for bad boys and girls. All drinks are £1.50 and £2. I ALTITUDE moves upstairs on Fri nights. DJ Alex Baker plays the biggest dance tunes and re-mixes. Dig out your rave gear. I On Sun (3 & 24), Lady Bex and Smiffy join forces for a, GIRLS ON TOP Bank Holiday Special. Cheap drinks, £5 entry or free with pass from R-Bar. I Sussex University LGBT society present TBLG REMIXED on Sun (31). Live bands and alternative music for students. Entry is £3, doors open 8pm. I Entry to Revenge is free Friday and R BAR Saturday nights before 11pm and all drinks are £2 before midnight (except special events). I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Miss Jason’s BARMY BINGO every Sun at 8.30pm is proving I Starting Wed June 3 Revenge launch a new night London to Brighton with DJ Gonzalo a huge hit. At the time of going to print the roll over prize was worth £400. I Miss (Beyond, Juicy & Barcode) and Jake Duval (Housexy, Eden & Ministry of Sound). Jason’s MAD HOUSE is every Mon at 10pm. I Every Sun have your home cooked, locally sourced roast dinner and then settle down for an acoustic session at 5pm. I On Fri and Sat night you can eat upstairs from the night menu till 7am in the morning. Look I CHARLES ST BAR Sunday Lunches noon- I SUNDAY SUNDAE@AUDIO Alfresco Flirt Fest, 7.15pm, cabaret: All mouth no trouser@ 7.15, free BBQ 6pm-8pm, DJs on Rotation Kate out for the 241 food vouchers. Pool is free 7 days a week in the upstairs bar were you I hosted by Connie Conway, bar opens noon Wildblood, Jon Byrne, Richard Jones, Diablo, Miss also find Wii Zone. I All drinks (excluding champagne, doubles and bottles of wine) are Followed by Drag Idol V at 8.30pm Masters, Mike Mikalis & Brian Cheetham, £3 b4 £1.99 every day except Thur & Fri from 7pm. On Fri at Tops & Bottoms from 8pm you I 112 CHURCH ST Richards Sunday Roast, 7pm, £4 b4 8pm then £5, 6pm-late order your drinks, toss a coin, if you win the toss you get the same round again for free. I noon-late secret beer garden, bar opens noon I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am Open from noon–2am Sun–Thurs and noon–late on Fri and Sat. www.revenge.co.uk I DR BRIGHTON’S Cafe Del Mar chill out, outside I WHITE HORSE Sunday roast noon-5pm, pool, drinking area, bar open 1pm smoking patio, opens noon I GLOUNGE Swinging Salami Sunday Spectacular I WILD FRUIT@TRU Peep Show! hosted by I CHARLES ST CLUB Mardi Gras: DJ Queen Jo I R-BAR Kinky Classics, DJ Hollie 8pm- hosted by Boogaloo Stu and Fake Bush with Gateau Dolly Rocket with special guest DJ Seamus Haji, plays funky house/anthems, visuals, sexy go go midnight, free pool upstairs, Wii zone, discount Chocolat, Captain Kidd, Team Mud TheSparklemotion Neil Duffie and Jon Byrne in the main room, Freddie dancers, £3 b4 11 £5 after, club open 11pm Revenge tickets, night menu midnight-7am (241 Showponies, fun starts 8pm, show starts 9pm Thomas, Queen Josephine in the Boudoir, I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret vouchers), bar opens noon I GROSVENOR Chill-Out Sunday, open 2pm, Trannyshack with Dusty O & Tasty Tim in Bamboogy. beer garden, bar opens noon I REVENGE Kinky Dangerous with Bimbo Jones! closed 6pm for private party £7 members £6 NUS, £7 with flyer before 10.30pm, I DR BRIGHTON’S DJ Tony B from 9.30pm, bar level 1 Kinky Pop: DJ Stu & Smiffy, play pop/chart, I IRON DUKE Steves Sunday lunch, 1-6pm £10 queue jump/adv, £12 guests, open 10pm-3am opens 1pm level 2 Dangerous House: DJ Dulcie & Bimbo I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Miss Jason’s I ZONE Karaoke 6.30pm, bar open 11am I ELECTRONIC DISCO @ SUGAQUBE pre club Jones play, funky chunky, vocal house, free b4 11, Barmy Bingo with bascon sandwich or chips, 5pm party, 9pm-3am with DJs Drew Palmer, Kate £5 b4 12, £7 b4 3am, £3 after and NUS all night, I KINGS ARMS Cruz & booze with guest DJ, MONDAY 25 Wildblood, Queen Josephine, Mike Mikalie & Miss £3 passes available from R-Bar, open 10.30pm 9pm, bar open 11am I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: Masters, free, discount passes for Funky Buddah I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open, 12-3pm, Great I LEGENDS Terrace open all day, lounge bar 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I ELECTRONIC DISCO @ FUNKY BUDDAH tunes to drink & shake to 9pm, open noon 11am-5am Cabaret Amber Dexterous, 3.15pm couples £15, Big Quiz hosted by Nick with great LOUNGE after hours party hosted by Daphne Lee, I VAVOOM 5th Birthday Party with Betty heated smoking area, free access all floors prizes, £1 entry, 7pm, heated smokers patio DJs Drew Palmer, Kate Wildblood, Queen Swollocks, street entertainers, dance boyz, free I MARINE TAVERN Elsie’s Packed Lunch, bar I ANGEL Available for private hire Josephine, Mike Mikalie & Ms Masters, £5, buffet, Upstairs VIP lounge with chart & dance opens 1pm - 1am I AQUARIUM Piano Bar with J.B playing music discount with pass 3am-dawn music, late bar till 6am I MARLBOROUGH Sunday roasts: noon to for all tastes 7pm opens 1pm I GHETTO Wigout: seriously unserious pop night I WHITE HORSE Food: Noon-5pm, Pool, heated finish, Walking Group: roast for you & your dog I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Back to The with Fifilicious, Kitty & Boogaloo Stu, free b4 smoking patio, opens noon noon, Clare Project MTFs/FTMs/Gender Queers/ 80s & 90s: DJ Steve Lush, free entry & access all 11pm, then £4/£3NUS, club opens 5.30pm I ZONE Sally Vait, 9.30pm, bar open 11am Transvestites/partners/friends & family social, £1, areas, heated smoking area, open 11pm I GLOUNGE Fitladz Bonk Holiday Sports Kit n 6pm, Drag King Quiz 7pm I BRIGHTON TAVERN Brilliant Bank Holiday, Shorts Party, Resident DJs on rotation Paul Heron, SUNDAY 24 I PV@JURY’S OUT Sunday roast noon till enjoy a cool Pimms, Pizza & pint night, Adams Devilish & Johnny M, darkrooms, cruise areas, I AMSTERDAM Open 11am-5am, Sunday lunch finished, free Wii after 5pm bar opens noon homemade flavoured vodkas, bar opens noon glory holes, £6 members/£8, open 10.30pm-5am noon-5.30pm, Connies karaoke 8pm-10.30pm, I QUEENS ARMS Cabaret: Kitty Litter, 5.30pm, I BULLDOG 87 Hour Weekend Marcias Glitter I GROSVENOR Grosvenor Groove, open 2pm sauna 2pm-4am £5 B4 7pm, £10 after, couples then Betty’s karaoke, bar opens noon Ball: 70/80s disco, 10pm-2am, bar opens 11am I KINGS ARMS Camo night, DJ Charlie, come £15, heated smokers patio. Late bar 1am-5am I R-BAR Sublime Sundays, roasts till 7pm, I CHARLES ST BAR Food: noon-8pm, Studio dressed in your camo gear, bar open 11am I ANGEL Chill Out! kick back & relax, opens 2pm acoustic session with Nicolette Street, 5pm, Miss 150 warm up, bar opens noon I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- I AQUARIUM Handbags at Dawn, The Return with Jason’s Barmy Bingo 8.30pm, free pool upstairs, I CHARLES ST CLUB Studio 150: Charles St 5pm, lounge opens 11am-5am, Pre Ignition from Pip Morgan and Maisie Trollette, 5.30pm followed Wii zone, bar opens noon Official Student Fun Night, DJs Luke Smith & Ali K, 7pm, heated smoking area, free entry to Basement by karaoke showtime, opens 1pm I REBEL AFTERHOURS@HONEYCLUB dancers, theme nights, open 10.30pm Club, access all floors I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Fever: Discount wristbands available Wild Fruit £6, £8 on I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, fun I MARINE TAVERN It’s Saturday let’s party! b4 DJ/producer Ross Alexander (Anthem/Northern the door, 3am-late quiz, 8pm, secret beer garden, bar opens noon clubbing, bar open noon - 2am Beat), free entry, access all areas, heated smoking I REVENGE Girls On Top Bank Holiday Party, I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of I MARLBOROUGH Lets Party! downstairs, 8pm area, open 11pm Lady Bex & Smiffy, £5 or free with pass from R-Bar, drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm I PV@JURY’S OUT Viva La Divas present live I BRIGHTON TAVERN Recovery Sunday, candle- 10.30pm I GHETTO Frat Party!:Hatties Birthday Party, DJs music with Carly Byrant 5pm Booty Call with DJ let chillout session 8pm bar open noon I STAR INN Mega Sunday lunch from Paulas Pookie, Beast, Fiflicious & Oh-My Neuf, student Soap, 8.30pm, bar opens noon I BULLDOG 87 Hour weekend: main bar DJ kitchen 12-4pm, Supersize free buffet 6pm, bar theme party, 9pm, club opens 5.30pm I QUEENS ARMS Cabaret: Miss Hap, 4pm, Kamp Grant 5pm-10pm, DJ Wayne 10pm-2am; top bar: opens noon I GROSVENOR Spring Bank Holiday open, 2pm Kevins karaoke 8pm, bar opens noon Karaoke, Micky 10-2am, bar open 11am I IRON DUKE Pop Quiz, 8.30pm bar open 1pm www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE OUT & ABOUT 39
THE SMALLEST STAGE WITH THE BIGGEST TALENT PRESENTS... SUNDAY CABARET AT IT'S VERY BEST! 5.30PM I KINGS ARMS Spring bank holiday games & Karaoke with Cat 10pm, club opens 5.30pm chill, play Wii & PS3 on screens 4 free, free I GROSVENOR Bar opens 5pm touchscreen jukebox, bar opens 11am I KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you BANK HOLIDAY I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, Food 12- choose the music, bar opens 11am 5pm lounge bar 11am-5am, cabaret Maisie I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- SUNDAY 3RD MAY Trollette & Josh Mill 3.15pm free all floors 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all I MARINE TAVERN Monday club with Lawrence, floors, heated smoking area DAVE LYNN - THE DEBUT! bar opens noon - 2am I MARINE TAVERN Quiz with Nat 9pm, entry £1 DAVE LYNN'S FIRST APPEARANCE I MARLBOROUGH Free darts & pool noon-6pm per person, 50% to charity, 50% to Snowball, bar Trans, queer and friends/family/partners night opens noon AT THE AQUARIUM “Mulan” on cinema screen, £3 I MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts noon-6pm I QUEENS ARMS Spring Bank Holiday fundraiser Drag King & Transvestite Night with (killer) pool & for Switchboard with Rose Garden & guests, poker, £2 8pm 4.30pm bar opens noon I PV@JURY’S OUT Is it only Tuesday? afterwork SUNDAY 10TH MAY I PV@JURY’S OUT Sundaylicious roast till 5pm, drinks deals 5-8pm, free nintendo Wii all day, bar free Wii after 5pm bar opens noon opens noon DIANE JAMES I R-BAR Miss Jason’s Mad House: 10pm, free I QUEENS ARMS Skint Unlimited Drinks & THE RETURN OF THE pool, Wii zone, bar opens noon Karaoke: DJ & karaoke night hosted by Betty I STAR INN Paulas kitchen 12-3pm, opens noon Swollocks 8pm, bar opens noon BOURNEMOUTH BOMBSHELL I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am I R-BAR Get ready for Revenge, DJ Simone, free I WHITE HORSE Pool, heated smoking patio, pool & Wii zone, bar opens noon opens noon I REVENGE Sound As A Pound, Top DJs play an SUNDAY 17TH MAY I ZONE You Say We Play, choose any music you eclectic collection of 80s, 90s, 00s, electro pop, THE BRIGHTON & HOVE (ACTUALLY) want all day & night, bar open 11am dance, cheese. You can win the door money, entry £1, opens 10.30am GAY MEN’S CHORUS TUESDAY 26 I STAR INN Paulas kitchen 12-3pm, opens noon I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am PRIOR TO THEIR CONCERT "COMING OUT OF MAKEUP" 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I WHITE HORSE Food noon-5pm, pool, heated couples £15, Tues social 7pm, heated smokers patio smoking patio, opens noon I ANGEL Bar opens 5pm I ZONE James’ big money quiz night 8pm, bar I AQUARIUM Josh Mills music night, an open 11am invitation to sing, 9pm opens 1pm I BASEMENT CLUB @ LEGENDS Scene Queen: WEDNESDAY 27 DJ Lil’Alex, special drinks deals with student/scene I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-1am, Restaurant: ID, open 11pm 11am-8pm, Sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I BRIGHTON TAVERN Games Galore in the couples £15, Student midweek karaoke + special evening, opens noon drinks deals 8pm, heated smokers patio I BULLDOG Bully Boyz men only top bar, I ANGEL Open mic night, 9pm, bar open 5pm members only 10pm-2am, bar opens 11am I AQUARIUM Piano Bar with JB, music for all BANK HOLIDAY I CALEDONIAN HOVE Bar250, opens 6pm tastes 7pm, opens 1pm SUNDAY 24TH MAY I CHARLES ST BAR Food: 12-8pm, open noon I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Gabbi’s Dirty I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret Handbag: DJ Gabbi plays handbag & house, free beer garden, bar opens noon entry access all floors, smoking area, open 11pm MAISIE TROLLETTE I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of I BRIGHTON TAVERN Wine Club, open noon drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm I BULLDOG Red Light Rush: cheap drinks when PIP MORGAN I GHETTO Alan The Mentalist hosts Quiz Alicious select artist plays 8pm-1am, open 11am 8pm, £1 entry, winner gets all the dosh, Twisted I CALEDONIAN Bar250, opens 6pm THE RETURN BOUT! WHO WILL COME OUT ON TOP THIS TIME?
SUNDAY 31ST MAY LADY JAMES ENTERTAINS! NEVER THE SAME SHOW TWICE
For details of Open Mic, our Special Karaoke Workshop and Special Events - see Gscene Listings or visit us at www.the-aquarium-theatre-bar.co.uk
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton
42 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT PICS FROM STAR INN + VAVOOM
MAY LISTINGS
STAR INN I ONE FOR THE DIARY: It’s the quiz of the week every Thur at 9pm with free sarnies at half time. I Every Friday start the weekend with Big Maria’s Fun Friday party night from 8pm. Cocktails and shots are available. I Tasty pub lunches are served daily from Paula’s Kitchen from noon-3pm. Vheck out the Mega Sun lunch from noon–4pm. I Watch out for the pizza and beer night coming soon on Mondays. I Open Sun–Thur from noon-11.30pm, Fri and Sat from noon-1am
I CHARLES ST BAR Food: 12-8pm, open noon I CHARLES ST BAR & CLUB Food noon-8pm, I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret Mad Cow XL: hosted by Ms Bond, DJ Lil Alex & beer garden, bar opens noon LeeRoy downstairs 8pm, upstairs 10pm, entry £1 to I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of good causes, bar opens noon drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret I GHETTO Transition: Goth/metal/punk nite, DJ beer garden, bar opens noon Peter Von Sleaze, £2.50 from 10pm, open 5.30pm I DR BRIGHTON’S Free pool with every round of www.myspace.com/brightontransition drinks 1-7pm, outside seating, bar opens 1pm VAVOOM GROSVENOR Keeping Woolies Alive.. Bring your GHETTO Sacrilege, the new Religion for I I I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Vavoom are celebrating their fifth birthday on Sat (23) hosted ipod & play your tunes in Pick ‘n’ Mix, opens 5pm Brighton, DJs Jon Byrne & Ms Masters! £3 from by Betty Swollocks, complete with street entertainers, dancing boyz, free buffet and a JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Student night 10pm, club opens 5.30pm I very special birthday cake. Special drink deals in May include: single vodka £2, KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you GROSVENOR Bar opens 5pm I I I double vodka £3.50 and pint of Becks £2 every day until 9pm and all night Mon, Wed and choose the music, bar opens 11am I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Best karaoke on I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- the south coast, 9pm Thurs (except for special events). Sourz and Sambuca is £1.50 all day and night (except for 5pm lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all floors, I KINGS ARMS Free touchscreen jukebox, you special events). Sourz £1 all night Mon and Thurs (except for special events). I Karaoke heated smoking area, Bona Bingo with Gabbi plus choose the music, bar opens 11am upstairs in the VIP lounge from 10pm every Wed and Fri. I Saturday night theme shag tag karoake & quiz from 9pm I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- parties in May are Bank Holiday Party (2), Superstars (9), Farm Boyz (16), 5th I MARINE TAVERN Dale’s Midweek Mayhem, 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, free access all Birthday Party (23) and Beach Boyz (30). www.vavoom.co.uk bar opens noon floors, heated smoking area, Gabbi’s fun & frolicks I MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts, noon-6pm party night, 9pm Unique LGBTQU darts for all levels with surprise, I MARINE TAVERN Gareths fun nite, open noon I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Celebration: I R-BAR Tops & Bottoms: order drinks, toss a £2 8pm I MARLBOROUGH Free pool & darts noon-6pm hosted by Dolly Rocket, DJ Peter Castle plays girly coin, winner gets same round for free, DJ Smiffy I PV@JURY’S OUT Infamous Quiz night with Open mic: sing, play, tell a joke or listen 9pm pop, disco & handbag, free, access all areas, from 8pm, Wii Zone, free pool upstairs, food (241 real prizes 8pm, bar opens noon I PV@JURY’S OUT Pop Vixens, Pre Girls On smoking area, open 11pm vouchers available) midnight-7am, discount I QUEENS ARMS Anything Goes! DJ Kamp Top, free Revenge tickets, bar opens noon I BRIGHTON TAVERN Weekend Starts Here! passes for Revenge, bar opens noon Kevin, karaoke, bingo, music & quiz, open noon I QUEENS ARMS Skint: Unlimited Drinks & Party night open till 2am, bar opens noon I REVENGE Level 1: Lollipop: 70s-00s, DJ I R-BAR Get ready for Revenge, free pool/Wii Karaoke with Betty 8pm-11pm, bar opens noon I BULLDOG 63 Hour Long Weekend: main bar: Stewart T plays top pop with the Lollipop girls, zone, bar open noon I R-BAR Girls On Top warm up party: DJ Verity DJ Marcia 10pm-2am, top bar: Karaoke hosted by Level 2: Altitude, DJ Alex Baker (Gaydar Radio) I REVENGE Guilty: DJ Lil Alex, funky electro 8pm-12pm, free Revenge passes, free pool Guy 10pm-3am, bar opens 11am plays dance & remixes, free b4 11, £5 after, £3 beats for bad boys & girls, free b4 12am/£2 after, upstairs, free Wii zone, bar opens noon I CALEDONIAN Karaoke 9.30pm open 6pm after 3am, £3 NUS all night, open 10.30pm free NUS, open 11pm I REVENGE Girls On Top Level 1: with DJs I CHARLES ST BAR open noon, food noon- I STAR INN Paulas Kitchen open 12-3pm, Big I STAR INN Paulas kitchen 12-3pm, opens noon Smiffy & Lady Bex playing chart/pop/trash/r’n’b. 8pm,Fairylee: pure cheese DJ Ruby Roo & Connie Maria’s Fun Friday 8pm, bar opens noon I VAVOOM Karaoke 10-late Late bar till 6am Level 2: with DJ Dulcie & Richard Jones playing Conway, hosted Joan Bond 9pm I VAVOOM Karaoke in upstairs lounge 10pm- I WHITE HORSE Food noon-5pm, smoking funky, vocal, house, £4/£3 NUS, free passes from I CHARLES ST CLUB Curiosity Lite: DJs Ali & late, Late bar till 6am patio, open noon R-Bar & PV, opens 10.30pm Ruby Roo play trashy/disco/pop, hosted by Connie I WHITE HORSE Food: noon-5pm, heated I ZONE Karaoke Mis Stake! 8.30pm, open 11am I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open 12-3pm, Quiz of Conway, £2, club opens 10.30pm smoking patio, open noon the week, Trivia galore! 9pm, free sarnies at half I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, cabaret I ZONE Chrissie du Cann, 9.30pm open 11am THURSDAY 28 time, bar opens noon corner with Krissie du Cann 9pm, secret beer I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-11pm, Restaurant: I TOM’S@G LOUNGE Leather/Fetish bar with garden, bar opens noon SATURDAY 30 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-4am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, dance area, free, go to www.tom-s.co.uk I DR BRIGHTON’S Ms Masters plays funky house I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-5am, Restaurant: couples £15, smokers patio, Relax & unwind I VAVOOM Upstairs VIP lounge, Late bar till 6am from 9pm, bar opens 1pm 11am-8pm, sauna 2pm-5am, £5 B4 7pm £10 I ANGEL Cocktail night, bar opens, 5pm I WHITE HORSE Food: noon-5pm, pool, heated I GHETTO Popstarz: indie anthems, alternative after, £15 couple, smokers patio, Sun Downers! I AQUARIUM Who Dares Sings open mic with Josh smoking patio, opens noon classics, DJs Pookie, Beast, Tommy & Dynamite Beach music & cocktails on terrace 7pm Late night Mills, 9pm opens 1pm I ZONE Comedy Film Zone, opens 11am Sal, free b4 11pm then £3, club opens 5.30pm bar 1am-5am I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Boys Below: I GROSVENOR Weekend starts here! open 5pm I ANGEL Spice Showtime 9pm bar opens 5pm men only, DJ Phill Marriott (Q Radio) commercial FRIDAY 29 I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Boogie Nights, I ANTHEM@HART (EASTBOURNE) An house with progressive edge, top stripper, free entry, I AMSTERDAM Bar: 11am-5am, restaurant: live DJ plays old classics Audience with Jo Francis hosted by Fonda Cox access all floors, smoking area, open 11pm 11am-8pm, sauna: 2pm-5am, £5 b4 7 £10 after, I KINGS ARMS Friday night booze & cruz with DJ Northern Beat, free buffet, adv tickets £5/ £6 on I BRIGHTON TAVERN Barmy Bingo with Fi for couples £15, smokers patio, pre-club drinks, DJ Boozy Bear, 10pm bar opens 11am the door £4 NUS & UB40, on the door, 10pm-2am Sussex Beacon, 8.30pm opens noon Weekend start, Late night bar 1am-5am I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- I AQUARIUM Two Landlord’s Karaoke 9pm, I BULLDOG top bar: Belong with DJ Grant 10pm- I ANGEL Cabaret: Trudi Styles, divatastic 5pm, lounge bar 11am-5am, Pre Celebration opens 1pm late, bar opens 11am showcase 9pm, bar opens 5pm hosted by Dolly Rocket, outside smoking area, free I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Ignition: DJ I CALEDONIAN HOVE Bar250, opens 6pm I AQUARIUM Vocal talents of Janet December access all floors Peter Castle, free entry & access all areas, heated from 9.30pm bar opens 1pm I MARINE TAVERN Tight Squeeze with Nat & smoking area, club opens 11pm Dale, bar opens noon I BRIGHTON TAVERN Hooray for Saturday Party I MARLBOROUGH Girls Night Out, guest DJs, live Night open till 2am, bar opens 11am SACRILEGE @ GHETTO music, 8pm I BULLDOG 63 Hour Weekend: main bar: VJ I ONE FOR THE DIARY: SACRILEGE THE CONFESSIONAL, is the new Religion in I PV Thank Funk It’s Friday, bar opens noon John 10pm-3am, top bar: karaoke with Micky, Brighton every Thur at Ghetto. DJ Jon Byrne and Miss Masters play all your house I QUEENS ARMS Camp Attack: DJ Andy B 9pm 10pm-3am, bar open 24 hrs favourites. Religious clubbing in a boutique setting. Entry is £3, Open 10-2am text requests on 07946 792444 bar opens noon I CALEDONIAN Piano bar hosted by Roberta Slack, 9.30pm open 6pm
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE OUT & ABOUT 43
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 44 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT PICS FROM ZONE + WILD FRUIT
MAY LISTINGS
ZONE I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Kitty Monroe graces the stage at the Zone on Sun (3) from 4.30pm. I Cabaret on Fri at 9pm features Gilly B & JJ (1), Deborah D’arcy (8) Little Zoe (22) and Chrissie du Cann (29). I Cabaret on Sat at 9pm includes Miss Hap (2, 16 & 30)& Sally Vate (9 & 23). I Happy hours throughout the month vary so ask at the bar for promotions. I Open Sun–Thur 11am–midnight. Fri & Sat 11am–12.30pm.
I CHARLES ST BAR food: 12-8pm open noon bar: Karaoke, Micky 10-2am, bar open 11am I CHARLES ST CLUB Mardi Gras: DJ Queen Jo I CHARLES ST CLUB Absolutely Dragulous plays funky house/anthems, visuals, sexy go go does Sweet Charity with Dave Lynn, Maisie dancers, £3 b4 11 £5 after, club open 11pm Trollette, Lady James, Connie Conway and Jamie I 112 CHURCH ST Food noon-8.30pm, secret Watson, £5 entry, door open 8pm showtime 9pm beer garden, bar opens noon I CHARLES ST BAR Sunday Lunches noon- I DR BRIGHTON’S DJ Tony B from 9.30pm, bar 7.15pm, cabaret: Rose Garden @ 7.15pm, hosted opens 1pm by Connie Conway, bar opens noon I GHETTO Wigout: seriously unserious pop night I 112 CHURCH ST Richards Sunday Roast, with Fifilicious, Kitty & Boogaloo Stu, free b4 noon-late secret beer garden, bar opens noon 11pm, then £4/£3NUS, club opens 5.30pm I DR BRIGHTON’S Cafe Del Mar chill out, free I GROSVENOR Grosvenor Groove, open 2pm game of pool with round of drinks, open 1pm I KINGS ARMS DJ Charlie plays funky house & I GHETTO BRIGHTON Nervous, Sirens with pop remixes, 10pm bar open 11am Euro Backcombe Disaster, 4 nights in one, £5 or I LEGENDS BAR Terrace open all day, food 12- £4, 9pm, club opens 5.30pm 5pm, lounge opens 11am-5am, Pre Ignition from I GLOUNGE Swinging Salami Sunday Spectacular 7pm, heated smoking area, free entry to Basement hosted by Boogaloo Stu + Fake Bush with Gateau Club, access all floors Chocolat, Captain Kidd, Team Mud I MARINE TAVERN It’s Saturday let’s party! b4 TheSparklemotion Showponies, fun starts 8pm, clubbing, bar open noon show starts 9pm I MARLBOROUGH Lets Party! downstairs, 8pm I GROSVENOR Chill-Out Sunday, opens 2pm I PV@JURY’S OUT Viva La Divas present live I IRON DUKE Steves Sunday lunch, 1-6pm music with Em 5pm Booty Call with DJ Aquarius, I JACK HORNER (WORTHING) Miss Jason’s 8.30pm, bar opens noon Barmy Bingo with bascon sandwich or chips, 5pm WILD FRUIT @ TRU I QUEENS ARMS Cabaret: Quinton Smith, 4pm, I KINGS ARMS Leather & rubber night, strict I ONE FOR THE DIARY: Yee Haa! Kick up some Bank Holiday dust at the WILD FRUIT Kamp Kevins karaoke 8pm, bar opens noon dress code, changing facilities 9pm, opens 11am SEX SALOON, on Sun (3). Grab yourself a rhinestone cowboy, buckin’ bronco, randy ranch I R-BAR Kinky Classics, DJ Hollie 8pm- I LEGENDS Terrace open all day, lounge bar hand, sexy mountain man or saucy saloon girl for some rootin’ tootin’ gunslingin’ ass bandit midnight, free pool upstairs, Wii zone, discount 11am-5am Cabaret Lady Imelda, 3.15pm heated fun with hostess Dolly Rocket and the infamous little big horn go go boys. Special guest DJs Revenge tickets, night menu midnight-7am (241 smoking area, free access all floors Prok & Fitch join resident DJs Neil Duffie and Jon Byrne in the main room. Freddie vouchers), bar opens noon MARINE TAVERN Elsie’s Packed Lunch, bar I Thomas and guests are in the r&b/urban Boudoir. Bamboogy Room features pop, mish/ REVENGE Kinky Dangerous! level 1 Kinky Pop: opens 1pm I mash madness. Entry £6 NUS, £9 Qjump/adv, £10 guests b4 11pm £12 guests after 11pm DJ Stu & Smiffy, play pop/chart, level 2 I MARLBOROUGH Sunday roasts: noon to Dangerous House: DJ Dulcie & guests play, funky finish, Walking Group: roast for you & your dog I PEEP SHOW Roll up, for the Sun (24) fruity lesson in ‘what the butler saw’ Bank Holiday chunky, vocal house, free b4 11, £5 b4 12, £7 b4 noon, Clare Project MTFs/FTMs/Gender Queers/ tease-a-rama special featuring live peepshow booths and ultra sexy go-go boy tease-a-ramas 3am, £3 after and NUS all night, £3 passes Transvestites/partners/friends & family social, £1, & the return of the Fruity Strippers. Visit the naughty peek-a-boo peep show booths for a right available from R-Bar, open 10.30pm 6pm, Drag King Quiz 7pm eyeful! Dress up or dress down in saucy underwear and fetish fashions, uniforms, feather I STAR INN Paulas kitchen open, 12-3pm, Great I PV@JURY’S OUT Sunday roast noon till boas, see through outfits, French maids, sequins and corsets- flash some sexy flesh tunes to drink & shake to 9pm, open noon finished, free Wii after 5pm bar opens noon burlesque style! 3 rooms of top titillation with a host of hot hostesses and randy go-go sluts. QUEENS ARMS Cabaret: Sandra 5.30pm, I VAVOOM Beech Boyz Party, Upstairs VIP I In the Main Room superstar DJ Seamus Haji joins Neil Duffie and Jon Byrne. In the r&b/ lounge with chart & dance music, late bar till 6am followed by Betty’s karaoke, bar opens noon urban Boudoir, its Freddie Thomas and Queen Josephine. Bamboogy Trannyshack I WHITE HORSE Food: Noon-5pm, Pool, heated I R-BAR Sublime Sundays, roasts till 7pm, smoking patio, opens noon acoustic session with AJ, 5pm, Miss Jason’s Dusty O & Tasty Tim are joined by Pop & Miss Mash. £7 mems, £6 NUS, £7 with flyer b4 I ZONE Miss Hap, 9.30pm, open 11am Barmy Bingo 8.30pm, free pool upstairs, Wii zone, 10.30pm £10 Qjump/adva, £12 Guests, Selected bottled beer £1.50 and house doubles + bar opens noon splash £3.50 for all Wild Fruits Advance tickets: Dr Brighton’s, Prowler Brighton, Clone Zone SUNDAY 31 I REVENGE Remixed, Sussex Uni’s TBLG Brighton, Charles St, Dome Box office 01273 709709 & ticketweb. Text aeon fruit to 61211to I AMSTERDAM Open 11am-5am, Sunday lunch presents night of live bands & alternative music for win VIP entry & discount passes (standard network rates apply), or go to aeonevents.co.uk noon-5.30pm, Connies karaoke 8pm-10.30pm, students, £3, 8pm sauna 2pm-4am £5 B4 7pm, £10 after, couples I STAR INN Mega Sunday lunch from Paulas @ AUDIO £15, heated smokers patio. Late bar 1am-5am kitchen 12-4pm, Supersize free buffet 6pm, bar SUNDAY SUNDAE Every Sun from 6pm-late. Enjoy that sexy holiday feeling without leaving Brighton with I ANGEL Chill Out! kick back & relax, opens 2pm opens noon I free BBQ and happy hour from 6–8pm. DJs on rotation include Kate Wildwood, Jon I AQUARIUM Lady James Entertains, 5.30pm I SUNDAY SUNDAE@AUDIO Alfresco Flirt Fest, followed by karaoke showtime, opens 1pm free BBQ 6pm-8pm, DJs on Rotation Kate Byrne, Richard Jones, Diablo, Miss Masters, Mike Mikalis & Brian Cheetham. Entry is I BASEMENT CLUB@LEGENDS Fever: Wildblood, Jon Byrne, Richard Jones, Diablo, Miss £3 before 7pm, £4 before 8pm, £5 after 8pm. DJ/producer Ross Alexander (Anthem/Northern Masters, Mike Mikalis & Brian Cheetham, £3 b4 Beat), free entry, access all areas, heated smoking 7pm, £4 b4 8pm then £5, 6pm-late REBEL @ HONEY CLUB area, open 11pm I VAVOOM Late bar till 6am Brighton’s original and sexiest afterhours club returns on (4 & 25) especially for all those WHITE HORSE Sunday roast noon-5pm, pool, I I BRIGHTON TAVERN Recovery Sunday, candle- I ‘dirty stop outs’ after Wild Fruit. Expect nothing less than the very best electro funky house at let chillout session 8pm bar open noon smoking patio, opens noon this tough and notoriously sexy after party with the Rebel residents. Discount admission £6 I BULLDOG 87 Hour weekend: main bar DJ I ZONE Karaoke 6.30pm, bar open 11am Grant 5pm-10pm, DJ Wayne 10pm-2am; top wristbands available from Wild Fruit with more £8 spaces available on door. Opens 3am
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE OUT & ABOUT 45
SOLENT LISTINGS
I BARS SOUTHAMPTON I CLUBS I ENDEAVOUR 7 Simnel Street Tel: 02380 211879 I SAUNAS Open: Mon-Thur: noon-11.30pm, Fri-Sat: noon- PORTSMOUTH midnight, Sun: noon-10.30pm. Traditional boozer hosted by Southampton’s original Diva, Miss I HAMPSHIRE BOULEVARD 1 Hampshire Terr, Southsea, Tel: 02392 297509 Moss. Always a welcome and great food. www.thehampshireboulevard.co.uk I ISOBAR 100c St Mary’s Street Open: Mon: 3pm-11pm, Tue: noon-1am, Wed- Tel: 02380 222028 Thur: noon-2am, Fri-Sat: noon-3am, Sun: noon- Open: Sun-Tue: 2pm-11pm, Wed-Sat: 2pm- 2am, cabaret bar and club midnight. Modern attitude bar, small but perfectly formed with outside decked garden area. Popular I OLD VIC 104 St Pauls Rd, Southsea Tel: 02392 297013 www.oldvicportsmouth.co.uk with younger crowd. Open: Mon-Fri: 11am till late, Sat: 5pm-late, Sun: I LONDON HOTEL 2 Terminus Terrace noon-12,30am. Tradition pub with regular cabaret, Tel: 02380 710652 www.the-london.co.uk serves food. Open: Mon-Thur: noon-11pm, Fri-Sat: noon- 12.30am, Sun: noon-11.30am. Friendly cabaret I MARTHA’S 227 Commerical Road Tel: 02392 877918 venue, serves food. Open: Mon-Sat. City centre bar, regular cabaret I EDGE Compton Walk Tel: 02380 366163 serves food www.theedgesouthampton.com Open: Tue-Fri & Sun: 9pm-3am, Sat: 9pm-5am. I CLUB 227 227 Commerical Road Tel: 02392 877918 Stylish club on 2 floors with 3 bars. Party till 5am Open: Mon, Fri & Sat: 11pm-2am. Nightclub with on a Saturday night - last entry at 3am. resident DJs Lee Harris & DJ RHI I PINK BROADWAY SAUNA 797/80 East Street Tel: 02380 238804 I TROPICS SAUNA 2 Market Way Tel: 02380 296100 www.tropics-sauna.com www.pink-broadway.com/sauna.html Open: Mon-Wed: 12-8pm, Thur-Sat: 11am-9pm Open: Sun-Thur: noon-10pm, Fri-Sat: noon-2am
FRIDAY 1 TUESDAY 5 SOUTHAMPTON SOUTHAMPTON I EDGE open 9pm-3am, Flirt, all drinks £2 I EDGE Edge & Loft Bars open 9pm-3am, (exceptions) till midnight qualifying Heats for Edge Factor final - chance to I LONDON HOTEL opens noon, cabaret Rose win £1000, win ipod, all drinks £2 (exceptions) till Garden @ 10pm midnight, free entry PORTSMOUTH I LONDON HOTEL Free pool, bar opens noon I HAMPSHIRE BLVD open noon-3am, cabaret PORTSMOUTH with Sandra @ 10.30pm, then DJs I OLD VIC Weakest Link quiz hosted by Rose I MARTHA’S Cheeky pre-club party 7-10pm Garden, chance to win £100,000 @ 9pm I CLUB 227 open 11pm-2am, DJ Lee Harris plays chart/dance, £3 b4 12, £4 after WEDNESDAY 6 SOUTHAMPTON SATURDAY 2 I EDGE Bar 150, in all 3 bars, all drinks £1.50 SOUTHAMPTON (few except), free entry b4 10pm, 9pm-3am I EDGE open 9pm-5am, Party Night in all 3 bars, I LONDON HOTEL Quiz Night, bar opens noon DJs on rotation, large enclosed smoking garden, PORTSMOUTH last entry 3am I HAMPSHIRE BLVD Dollys Whore House, live I LONDON HOTEL opens noon, Jacquii Cann @ cabaret @ 10pm bar open noon-2am 10pm PORTSMOUTH THURSDAY 7 I HAMPSHIRE BLVD open noon-3am, Divine SOUTHAMPTON Diva hosts night of mad camp & cheesy tunes I EDGE Reloaded in Edge & Loft Bars, cash prize I MARTHA’S Cabaret: Miss Jason @ 10pm winner takes all, all drinks £2 (exceptions) B4 I OLD VIC Diane James & Cassie @ 9.30pm midnight, gay anthems/chart hits, open 9pm-3am I CLUB 227 open 11-2am, DJ RHI plays dance, I LONDON HOTEL bar opens noon, Karaoke £4 B4 12 £5 after Cruising with Pat Cruise @ 9pm PORTSMOUTH SUNDAY 3 I HAMPSHIRE BLVD bar opens noon-2am, SOUTHAMPTON Karaoke with Ben @ 10pm I EDGE open 9pm-3am, Fun on the first floor, I MARTHA’S Back 2the 90s+karaoke with big Stan qualifying Heats for Edge Factor final, chance to I OLD VIC Karaoke @ 8pm win £1000, win ipod, all drinks £2 (exceptions) all night FRIDAY 8 I LONDON HOTEL Lucinda Lashes @ 9.30pm, SOUTHAMPTON Sunday lunch noon-3pm, bar open noon I EDGE 925 Weekender with Kelly Llorenna on PORTSMOUTH stage @ midnight, all drinks (exceptions) £2 till I HAMPSHIRE BLVD open noon-2am, Sunday midnight, free shots, 9pm-5am Roast served 5-8pm, Pat Cruise hosts karaoke & I LONDON HOTEL bar opens noon-1am, FriGAY Camp Attack @ 9.30pm Night with Lucinda Lashes @ 10pm I OLD VIC Sunday roast 1-5pm, Amy Winehouse PORTSMOUTH Tribute Act @ 9.30pm I HAMPSHIRE BLVD open noon-3am, College Boy (stripper) @ 10.30pm, then live DJs MONDAY 4 I MARTHA’S Cheeky pre-club party 7-10pm SOUTHAMPTON I CLUB 227 DJ Lee Harris chart/dance, £3 b4 I LONDON HOTEL bar opens noon, Karaoke midnight/£4, 11pm-2am Cruising with Pat Cruise @ 9pm PORTSMOUTH SATURDAY 9 I MARTHA’S Mad Cow, 9pm selected drinks SOUTHAMPTON £1.50 all night I EDGE open 9pm-5am, Party Night in all 3 bars, I CLUB 227 DJ Lee Harris, £2 B4 12, £3 after DJs on rotation, large enclosed smoking garden, last entry 3am
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 46 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT PICS FROM LONDON HOTEL, SOUTHAMPTON
SOLENT LISTINGS DARREN HIGGSON LEE DRISCOLL DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER Last month, The London Hotel in Southampton organised a fundraiser in Memory of Lee Driscoll who passed away from a tumor aged 36. Lee was the type of person who never had a bad word to say about anyone and this was reflected in the turnout of friends and work colleagues on the night. Darren Higginson, Lee’s Partner of 19 years wanted the London to put on the event to celebrate Lee’s life and to show his appreciation for everything Countess Mountbatten Hospice had done for him. Lee loved James Bond and Shirley Bassey, so the natural title of the event had to be Diamonds Are For Ever and the dress code for the evening was Black Tie and Feather Boas. An amazing and record breaking £6200 was raised on the night by the London Hotel for Countess Mountbatten Hospice. The London Hotel send a huge thank you to everyone involved in organising and attending the event to help raise the money.
I LONDON HOTEL Bar opens noon-1am THURSDAY 14 I OLD VIC Sunday Roast 1-5pm Lady James @ FRIDAY 22 9.30pm PORTSMOUTH SOUTHAMPTON SOUTHAMPTON HAMPSHIRE BLVD Divine Diva hosts night of EDGE Flirt, all drinks £2 (exceptions) till I I EDGE Reloaded in Edge & Loft Bars, cash prize MONDAY 18 I mad camp & cheesy tunes, open noon-3am winner takes all, all drinks £2 (exceptions) B4 midnight, open 9pm-3am SOUTHAMPTON I MARTHA’S Cabaret Lola Lasagne @ 10pm midnight, gay anthems/chart hits, open 9pm-3am I LONDON HOTEL Cabaret Miss Penny @ LONDON HOTEL Free pool, bar opens noon I CLUB 227 DJ RHI plays dance, £4 B4 12 £5 LONDON HOTEL Karaoke Cruising with Pat I 10pm, bar opens noon I PORTSMOUTH after, 11-2am Cruise @ 9pm bar opens noon PORTSMOUTH MARTHA’S Mad Cow, 9pm selected drinks PORTSMOUTH I I HAMPSHIRE BLVD Scarlett Diamonte @ SUNDAY 10 £1.50 all night HAMPSHIRE BLVD Karaoke with Ben @ 10.30pm, then live DJs, open noon-3am I CLUB 227 DJ Lee Harris, £2 B4 12 £3 after SOUTHAMPTON 10pm, bar opens noon-2am I I MARTHA’S Cheeky pre-club party 7-10pm EDGE Fun on the first floor, qualifying Heats for I I MARTHA’S Back 2 the 90s/Karaoke with big Stan I CLUB 227 DJ Lee Harris plays chart & dance, Edge Factor final - chance to win £1000, win ipod, TUESDAY 19 I OLD VIC Karaoke, 8pm £3 b4 12, £4 after, open 11pm-2am all drinks £2 (exceptions) all night, open 9pm- SOUTHAMPTON 3am FRIDAY 15 I EDGE Edge & Loft Bars open 9pm-3am, SATURDAY 23 qualifying Heats for Edge Factor final - chance to I LONDON HOTEL Cabaret: Dave Lynn @ SOUTHAMPTON SOUTHAMPTON win £1000, win ipod, all drinks £2 (exceptions) till 9.30pm, Sunday lunch noon-3pm, bar open noon EDGE Flirt, all drinks £2 (exceptions) till I EDGE Fun on the first floor, qualifying Heats for I midnight, free entry PORTSMOUTH midnight, open 9pm-3am Edge Factor final - chance to win £1000, win ipod, LONDON HOTEL Free pool, bar opens noon I HAMPSHIRE BLVD Sunday Roast served from LONDON HOTEL Cabaret Miss Penny @ I open 9pm-3am I PORTSMOUTH 5-8pm, Pat Cruise hosts karaoke & camp attack @ 10pm, bar opens noon I LONDON HOTEL open noon, Jo Francis @ OLD VIC Weakest Link quiz hosted by Rose 9.30pm bar open noon-2am PORTSMOUTH I 10pm OLD VIC Sunday Roast 1-5pm, Ava la Putin @ Garden, chance to win £100,000 @ 9pm I I HAMPSHIRE BLVD Karen Dalton (singer) @ PORTSMOUTH 9.30pm HAMPSHIRE BLVD Divine Diva hosts night of 10.30pm, then live DJs, open noon-3am WEDNESDAY 20 I MARTHA’S Cheeky pre-club party 7-10pm mad camp & cheesy tunes, open noon-3am MONDAY 11 I SOUTHAMPTON CLUB 227 DJ Lee Harris plays chart & dance, I MARTHA’S Cabaret: Cookie @ 10pm I EDGE Bar 150, in all 3 bars, Emergency SOUTHAMPTON £3 b4 12, £4 after, open 11pm-2am I I CLUB 227 DJ RHI plays dance, £4 B4 12 £5 I LONDON HOTEL Free pool, bar opens noon Services theme night, free entry b4 10pm, WKD after, 11-2am PORTSMOUTH SATURDAY 16 raffle, bottle of wine for best dressed, all drinks £1.50 (few except), free entry b4 10pm, 9pm-3am I MARTHA’S Mad Cow, 9pm selected drinks SOUTHAMPTON SUNDAY 24 LONDON HOTEL Bar opens noon £1.50 all night EDGE Party Night in all 3 bars, DJs on rotation, I SOUTHAMPTON I PORTSMOUTH I CLUB 227 DJ Lee Harris, £2 B4 12, £3 after large enclosed smoking garden, open 9pm-5am, I EDGE Fun on the first floor, charity evening for HAMPSHIRE BLVD Dollys Whore House, live last entry 3am I CDF, guest appearance Philip Oliver, qualifying TUESDAY 12 cabaret @ 10pm bar open noon-2am I LONDON HOTEL Eurovision Song Contest on Heats for Edge Factor final, chance to win £1000, SOUTHAMPTON win ipod, all drinks £2 (exceptions) all night, open the big screen @ 8pm, bar opens noon THURSDAY 21 I EDGE Edge & Loft Bars open 9pm-3am, PORTSMOUTH 9pm-5am SOUTHAMPTON qualifying Heats for Edge Factor final - chance to HAMPSHIRE BLVD Divine Diva hosts night of I LONDON HOTEL Bona Bingo 4pm Cabaret: I EDGE Reloaded in Edge & Loft Bars, cash prize win £1000, win ipod, all drinks £2 (exceptions) till mad camp & cheesy tunes, open noon-3am I Lola Lasagne @ 9.30pm, bar opens noon winner takes all, all drinks £2 (exceptions) B4 midnight, free entry MARTHA’S Cabaret Kandi Kane @ 10pm PORTSMOUTH I midnight, gay anthems/chart hits, open 9pm-3am I LONDON HOTEL Free pool, bar opens noon CLUB 227 DJ RHI plays dance, £4 B4 12 £5 I HAMPSHIRE BLVD Sunday Roast served from I LONDON HOTEL Karaoke Cruising with Pat PORTSMOUTH after, 11-2am I 5-8pm, Pat Cruise hosts karaoke & camp attack @ I OLD VIC Weakest Link quiz hosted by Rose Cruise, 9pm bar opens noon 9.30pm bar open noon-2am PORTSMOUTH Garden, chance to win £100,000 @ 9pm SUNDAY 17 I OLD VIC Sunday Roast 1-5pm Jacqui Bennett HAMPSHIRE BLVD Karaoke with Ben from SOUTHAMPTON I @ 9.30pm WEDNESDAY 13 10pm, bar opens noon-2am EDGE Fun on the first floor, qualifying Heats for I MARTHA’S National Drag Idol V, Portsmouth SOUTHAMPTON Edge Factor final - chance to win £1000, win ipod, I MONDAY 25 Heat hosted by Mandy Gap @ 8pm, competition I EDGE Bar 150, in all 3 bars, all drinks £1.50 all drinks £2 (exceptions) all night, open 9pm- SOUTHAMPTON for amateur singers, comics, clowns, drag acts, (few except), free entry b4 10pm, 9pm-3am 3am I LONDON HOTEL Karaoke Cruising with Pat winner gets £1,225 worth of prizes. To enter fill in I LONDON HOTEL Bar opens noon LONDON HOTEL IDAHO DAY Lucinda Lashes Cruise @ 9pm bar opens noon I form at Marthas or message the Official Marthas PORTSMOUTH @ 9.30pm, Sunday lunch noon-3pm, open noon PORTSMOUTH Facebook Group I HAMPSHIRE BLVD Dollys Whore House, live PORTSMOUTH I MARTHA’S Mad Cow, 9pm selected drinks cabaret @ 10pm bar open noon-2am I OLD VIC Karaoke, 8pm I HAMPSHIRE BLVD Sunday Roast served from £1.50 all night 5-8pm, Pat Cruise hosts karaoke & camp attack @ I CLUB 227 DJ Lee Harris, £2 B4 12, £3 after 9.30pm bar open noon-2am www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton PICS FROM THE EDGE, SOUTHAMPTON GSCENE OUT & ABOUT 47
TUESDAY 26 I LONDON HOTEL Cabaret: Diane James @ SOUTHAMPTON 10pm bar opens noon PORTSMOUTH I EDGE Edge & Loft Bars open 9pm-3am, qualifying Heats for Edge Factor final - chance to I HAMPSHIRE BLVD Titti Le Camp @ 10.30pm win £1000, win ipod, all drinks £2 (exceptions) till then live DJs, open noon-3am midnight, free entry I MARTHA’S Cheeky pre-club party 7-10pm CLUB 227 DJ Lee Harris plays chart & dance, I LONDON HOTEL Free pool, bar opens noon I PORTSMOUTH £3 b4 12, £4 after, open 11pm-2am OLD VIC Weakest Link quiz hosted by Rose I SATURDAY 30 Garden, chance to win £100,000 @ 9pm SOUTHAMPTON WEDNESDAY 27 I EDGE Fun on the first floor, qualifying Heats for SOUTHAMPTON Edge Factor final - chance to win £1000, win ipod, open 9pm-3am I EDGE Bar 150, in all 3 bars, all drinks £1.50 (few except), free entry b4 10pm, 9pm-3am I LONDON HOTEL bar opens noon PORTSMOUTH I LONDON HOTEL Bar opens noon PORTSMOUTH I HAMPSHIRE BLVD Divine Diva hosts night of mad camp & cheesy tunes, open noon-3am I HAMPSHIRE BLVD Dollys Whore House, live cabaret @ 10pm bar open noon-2am I MARTHA’S Cabaret: TBC @ 10pm I OLD VIC Cabaret: Sandra @ 9.30pm THURSDAY 28 I CLUB 227 DJ RHI plays dance, £4 B4 12 £5 SOUTHAMPTON after, 11-2am EDGE Reloaded in Edge & Loft Bars, cash prize I SUNDAY 31 winner takes all, all drinks £2 (exceptions) B4 midnight, gay anthems/chart hits, open 9pm-3am SOUTHAMPTON EDGE Fun on the first floor, Edge Factor Final - I LONDON HOTEL Karaoke Cruising with Pat I Cruise, 9pm bar opens noon winner gets £1000, win ipod, all drinks £2 PORTSMOUTH (exceptions) all night, open 9pm-3am LONDON HOTEL bar open noon, Sunday lunch I HAMPSHIRE BLVD Karaoke with Ben from I 10pm, bar opens noon-2am noon-3pm, Lizzie Drip @ 9.30pm PORTSMOUTH I MARTHA’S Back2 the 90/Karaoke with big Stan HAMPSHIRE BLVD Sunday Roast served from I OLD VIC Karaoke, 8pm I 5-8pm, Pat Cruise hosts karaoke & camp attack @ FRIDAY 29 9.30pm bar open noon-2am SOUTHAMPTON I OLD VIC Sunday roast 1-5pm, Sophie @ 9.30pm I EDGE Flirt, all drinks £2 (exceptions) till midnight, open 9pm-3am www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 48 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT combination of puppetry and live favourite foul-mouthed action to tell the story of cartoonists’ latest work, including ARTS Shakespeare’s ambitious but ill- silkscreens, stuff with strings and BYMICHAELHOOTMAN fated Scottish thane. wood and a 100-year calendar.
ST BARTHOLOMEWS IAMBIC ARTS THEATRE Ann Street, Brighton Gardner St, Brighton, www.iambicarts.co.uk PUCCINI OPERA GALA (Sat 23) is DIVA IN THE HOUSE (Sat 2–Tue 5) is a one- an evening entirely devoted to the woman show starring Jackie Skarvellis from composer. Features excerpts from
JACKIE SKARVELLIS the original production by Martin Starkie: a Madame Butterfly, Tosca, Turandot comedy of theatrical bad manners. and La Boheme. ALICE IN WONDERLAND (Tue 19–Thu 21) shows you Alice as you’ve never seen her. An incredible new production from Pentameters Theatre BOXBIRD GALLERY has a cast of vibrant young actors, film and audience interaction. St Johns Road, Brighton MYSTERY EVENTS (Tue 12–Sat 16) is, as billed, a complete mystery. But CINEMASCOPE (Fri 8–Mon 25) is you can expect poetry readings, music and staged performances. Check an exhibition of artworks inspired out www.iambicarts.co.uk for up-to-the-minute info. by 100 years of international film. TRIPLE BILL (Thu 7–Sat 9) includes two plays by Hawkwind frontman, the late Robert Calvert: Cattle At Twilight and The Stars That Play SPIEGELTENT A PLACE OF SAFETY With Laughing Sam’s Dice. The third play is The Glass Bottle & The Old Steine Lawns, Brighton Child by Emma D’Arcy. THE SENSATION THAT IS SASHA NIGHTINGALE THEATRE KHAN (Tue 14) is the story of a Surrey Street, Brighton FRINGE FESTIVAL cross-dressing version of the boy from a village in Punjab who A PLACE OF SAFETY (Wed 20) is a All tickets can be booked on classic, women wear trousers and grew into the Indian transsexual rehearsed reading. A former social 01273 709709 or men don dresses so everyone and sensational Soho performer. worker confronts the past, asking brightonfestivalfringe.org.uk comes out on top. Exotic dance, lighthearted humour “Could I have known it was going An exhibition of work by local and engaging drama abound. to happen?” BRIGHTHELM CENTRE lesbian artists is showing during THE OCTOBER REVOLUTIONS (Fri North Rd, Brighton the Festival, including artists such UPSTAIRS AT THREE & TEN 22) is Brian Mitchell’s bitter- ELECTION IDOL (Tue 12–Sat 23) as Tess Shearing, Emma Sheil and Steine Street, Brighton sweet comedy of love, loss and the uses song and dance as the Gael Maihol. EUROVISION (Sat 9 and Fri 22) is Blue Peter Garden. “Brilliant weapons when a host of celebrities set in Copenhagen, 1966. Hours actors, spotless writing... highly battle it out to be Britain’s first BRIGHTON LITTLE THEATRE before the contest, UK entrant entertaining and very funny.” president. A searing indictment of Clarence Gardens, Brighton Didi discovers that love isn’t as Latest 7. today’s political climate. THE HAUNTING OF HILL HOUSE simple as her song suggests. A (Sat 9–Sat 16) is an adaptation of touching comedy about dreams and ambition. FRIDA KAHLO: VIVA LA VIDA (Tue 12, Wed 13, Fri 15, Sat 17) is a story of art, passion and obsession and an explosive portrait of Latin America’s greatest
TABLEAU SCHMABLEAU! female painter. Sharp, witty and bursting with colour. OUTWARD BOUND (Fri 22–Sun 24) FIRST DOMINO asks what would make a gay man and a Jewish woman spend the THE FORECOURT Shirley Jackson’s celebrated ghost night together. Forced to explore LATEST MUSIC BAR Opposite 12 Seafield Rd, Hove story. A group researching the new terrain with Thermos and Manchester St, Brighton TABLEAU SCHMABLEAU! (Sats and supernatural come to study the Tupperware, Vagina Monologues THE FIRST DOMINO (Tue 19–Sat Suns 2–5pm) portrays a delightful house. They are led by an meets Brokeback Mountain. 23) is an edgy, terrifying and very miniature world of wonder. Local accomplished anthropologist moving play written by a survivor artist Nica has fashioned a risking professional ridicule and INK_D GALLERY of the Soho bombing. Playwright sometimes whimsical, sometimes include a psychic, a woman who North Road, Brighton Jonathan Cash was standing a few dark portrait of animals – attracts poltergeists and the future MODERN TOSS: BUY MORE SHIT feet away from the device when it including humans – designed to heir of Hill House. But not all of (Sat 2–Mon 25) has Brighton’s exploded. It has taken him several either make you go “aaaahhh” or them will leave alive… years to write about the events “urghhhh”. Warning: some exhibits with objectivity. The result is a are not suitable for children or BRIGHTON brooding and surprisingly witty those of a nervous disposition. UNITARIAN CHURCH drama about our own fears and New Road, Brighton judgements. A strange relationship MARLBOROUGH THEATRE SHACKLED (Sat 2–Thu 7) has two develops between the nail bomber Princes St, Brighton men waking, shackled together. A and his prison doctor as cat-and- www.the-marlborough.co.uk twisted, dark comedy rapidly mouse games begin. Secrets are The Marlborough will be hosting unfolds as we discover who did it revealed, reality blurs and the 84 shows in 24 days during the and why. “Raw and challenging.” audience is taken on a terrifying Festival, many of an LGBT nature, The Stage. journey ending with a shocking so check their website for details. MACBETH (Tue 19–Sun 24) is a denouement in a theatrical tour- THE TAMING OF THE SHREW (Fri 8, visually stunning and atmospheric de-force. Sat 9) gets a makeover. In this production using a mesmerising
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE OUT & ABOUT 49 KOMEDIA in the lives of the drama they have Gardner Street, Brighton gone to review. This is the play A CLOUD IN TROUSERS (Sun 17, where ‘real life’ ends up on stage
Sun 24, Mon 25) is a one-woman PAUL L MARTIN and ‘on stage’ ends up in the show with cellist accompaniment. audience. AFTER MAGRITTE is 35 A mesmeric work of poetic drama minutes of mayhem that is absurd, and music based on the work of surreal, hilarious, ingenious and Russian poet Vladimir very curious to boot. Imagine Mayakovsky. Its themes are love, Dad’s Army meets Derrida or THE REAL INSPECTOR HOUND religion, revolution and art. perhaps Steptoe And Son colliding BOURGEOIS AND MAURICE (Sun with Schopenhauer. 10) invite you to pack up your troubles in your Prada bag and CONGRESS THEATRE join the darlings of the neo- Carlisle Road, Eastbourne cabaret scene. Bitingly funny Box office 01323 412000 BRIGHTON CENTRE songs, stunning film footage and CAROUSEL (Wed 27–Sat 30) is one Kings Road, Brighton sensational costume changes. that mixes bawdy humour, pathos, of Rodgers and Hammerstein’s Box office 0844 847 1515 “Unmissable.” Time Out. lecture-style slide-shows and best-loved musicals. When a The BLUE MAN GROUP (Thu 14) SWING EMPORIUM (Sat 30), in the theatre to tell a unique and trusting young mill worker falls for has the internationally renowned studio bar, is a swinging night fantastical tale. Billy, a charismatic fairground ensemble performing favourites of dirty dixie gypsy jazz with live PAUL L MARTIN: WIDE EYED AND barker, she believes she will always such as whirlpool drumming, band the Magic Number, DJs LEGLESS (Sun 10) has the widely be happy. Despite a troubled and marshmallow throwing and paint Michele and Teilo, special guests, hailed king of cabaret performing violent relationship, the naive and spitting. When performed in fun and games! Tickets in advance his first solo show in four years trusting Julie never stops loving arenas, the multimedia show is in from Rounder and Resident Records. with an intimate evening of new Billy. Julie falls pregnant but in an its element, with innovative songs and old favourites. effort to provide for his family, components from surreal theatre, “Adorable.” Joan Rivers; “Master of Billy dies in a botched robbery. slapstick, video, lightshow and the realm – whip cracks everyone Given one chance to put things stimulating rock music. into line with an acerbic flick of his right by a heavenly gatekeeper, COUNTING CROWS (Sun 24) are tongue.” The List. Billy returns to Earth for one day influenced by Van Morrison, Dylan AND THE DEVIL MAY DRAG YOU in order to help his unhappy and Nirvana and have had music UNDER (Sat 2–Fri 22) is a night daughter and make amends for his featured in the Shrek films – and of cabaret from the team behind past misdeeds. Includes June Is they’ve also had a US No 1 hit Le Scandal, which features an Bustin’ Out All Over and You’ll with Accidentally In Love. astonishing line-up of Never Walk Alone. international circus and cabaret stars including Des O’Connor, Eric
MAGIC NUMBER SWING EMPORIUM Walton, New York signature aerialists Mantryx and ‘white hot’ house band Frisky and Mannish. ST ANN’S WELL GARDENS “Superb.” Time Out. Somerhill Road, Hove SING-ALONG SUNDAY gives you Festival Shakespeare Company the opportunity to sing along to 38 Gardner Street Brighton BN1 1UN presents A MIDSUMMER NIGHT’S your favourite films – expect fancy Your new boutique theatre - purpose built and centrally located DREAM (Thu 7–Sun 10, Wed dress and weirdly weird in the North Laines complete with small bar & terrace! 13–Sun 17). Bring a picnic to see performers. The films featured will the Bard’s most enchanting be Rocky Horror Picture Show (3), comedy revived in a magical open Moulin Rouge (17) and Bugsy IS THERE A DIVA IN THE HOUSE? -air production. Malone (24). Starring award winning CHRIS CROSS (Tue 12) is the rock FLETCH AT ST ANDREWS ‘n’ roll of cabaret. He travels the Jackie Skarvellis Waterloo Street, Hove world performing his act mixing OPENS Saturday 2nd May GODFATHER DEATH (Tue 5–Sun stand-up comedy, magic, & up to May 5th 10) has a young man discovering contortionism and escapology that his godfather is ‘Death’. together to create a high-energy, Is There A Diva In The House? The Ultimate One-Woman Spoof, follows the Unsurprisingly, his life then takes kick-ass show. a dramatic turn. A strange and travels of the Original Internationally renowned ‘La Divina’, Maria Callas, powerful Brothers Grimm fairytale. NEW VENTURE THEATRE through the Opera houses of the world... “Great energy and inventiveness.” Bedford Place, Hove The Fringe Review. FESTEN (Sat 2–Sat 16) is a dark, ‘A light-fun affectionate theatrical send-up’ (Camden New Journal) THE HAUNTED MOUSTACHE (Sat 9, explosive and powerful award- Tue 19) is an epic journey winning play about family secrets £12 (£10 Cons) encountering occultists, freak and lies. Doors open 7.30pm, performance at 8pm shows, clairvoyants and a former A Tom Stoppard double bill (Tue model of Salvador Dalí. It’s a 19–Sun 24) kicks off with THE quest to uncover the mystery of a REAL INSPECTOR HOUND, in which Please check www.iambicarts.co.uk for full details singular heirloom: a great aunt’s two theatre critics attend a and for rest of our plays throughout MAY FESTIVAL moustache! Set in Brighton in the performance of an Agatha Christie- Box Office: 01273 572101 early ’90s, this is a mischievous type whodunnit, little knowing and award-winning performance that they will become key players [email protected]
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 50 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT these aims are being met. We’ve been invited to perform in places as diverse as the Foreign Office, the Royal Academy of Music, the Theatre Royal and, of course, our regular venue at St Andrews. We’ve also raised thousands of pounds for local and national charities such as Pride in Brighton & Hove, Children in Need, The Friends of St Andrews and the Mayor’s Charities, as well as doing our bit for The Sussex Beacon.” For Pride at the end of July the Chorus is working on a 1940s theme as part of the show. This year marks the 70th anniversary of the start of World War II and they will be performing some great music and songs from the period. The choir has now incorporated its board as Actually CIC. CIC stands for Community Interest Company. This is akin to a charity, although they have wider scope to do more within the community than a charity would. Actually CIC will continue to manage the Chorus, plus promote other events and develop and support new community projects. Watch DROPPING THE DRAG this space for an exciting programme of activities. The brilliant BRIGHTON & HOVE (ACTUALLY) GAY MEN’S CHORUS, John continued: “As with any endeavour, none of this would be possible under the baton of Jason Pimblett, returns to the stage at St Andrews without the help and support of so many. Gscene has been a great Church, Waterloo Street, Hove, for a very special Fringe performance. In supporter. The Friends of St Andrew’s Church have provided us with a Coming Out Of Make-Up they’ll be joined by five gifted performers best superb performance space. We are very grateful to them and to our fans known by their drag personas: David Raven (Maisie Trollette), Jason and generous sponsors. I encourage everyone to consider joining a Sutton (Miss Jason), Robert James (Lady James), Scott Burey (Drag singing group. Brighton & Hove is blessed with a multitude of gay and With No Name) and Dave Lynn (pictured above, L–R). Jason Pimblett other choirs. It is such a fun pastime.” said: “We are delighted to be singing with these five supremely talented and well-loved entertainers. It will be a unique event. An evening of Coming Out Of Make-Up, St Andrews Church, Sat 23, 7.30pm. superb entertainment with great songs, and one not to be missed.” From Dec 07- Dec 08, the Chorus raised £2,442. for local organisations. Proceeds from the concert will go to the Mayor’s Charities. Tickets are For more information on the Chorus, see www.bhagmc.org. £10, available from the Dome Box Office, the Iron Duke, Aquarium Theatre Bar, the Bulldog and on the door. Chairman of the Chorus John Hamilton said: “Since forming three years A BIT OF ROUGH ago, the Chorus has developed musically and creatively, growing from Andrew is Butch. By name if not by nature. He is Butch of Topping &… just six singers to 50 and building up a loyal fanbase along the way. We fame – Britain’s best-loved gay topical musical comedy duo. Andrew is perform everything from the great musical standards through operetta the cuter, younger one with nice teeth. into full-blown opera. When we set up the Chorus, our aims were very I tell Topping (the older one with funny eyebrows) that I knew Andrew simple – to provide a place where gay men could socialise, have fun and before he was Butch. “Didn’t we all,” says Mr Topping. Topping & Butch develop their vocal and creative skills. I think we can safely say that have been going for seven years now – after meeting in the cloakroom at Club Revenge. “Not in the lavatory,” Topping stresses. Andrew used to be a Brighton boy. He came down here to study the Sexual Dissidence course at the University of Sussex with the legendary Andy Medhurst. But that’s not important right now. These days Topping & Butch are popular enough to play the Parlure Spiegeltent at the Brighton Festival Fringe, with their new show THE ROUGH GUIDE TO SEX. “Or The Guide To Rough Sex,” says Topping. “Whatever. I can’t wait to come down to Brighton again. It’s refreshing to see so many old faces – and so many attractive new ones.” “It’s the what of sex,” Andy says, slightly cryptically. “We have a change of image.” Really? TOPPING & BUTCH “Yes, no rubber.” Topping & Butch normally do shows about current affairs. So what can they teach us about sex? Is it any good? “Never get involved,” Mr Topping shudders. “Inappropriate objects of desire. Giant age gaps.” Speaking of which, are you two an item? In unison: “No!” Shall we get back to sex? “Lots of sex can be fun,” Andrew says wistfully. “The new show’s really about love and sex, though. We all have too much or too little. At least, I do.” Even you? “Yes! The message is don’t love yourself too much. And don’t set your heights too high.” I never do. Topping & Butch’s Rough Guide To Love, Parlure Spiegeltent, St Peter’s Church, Brighton, Wed 6, 9.45pm. www.toppingandbutch.com.
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE OUT & ABOUT 51 VEGAS TO BRIGHTON! ART I had been aware of The Blue Man Group for years without ever really MATTERS knowing what the ever-so-slightly-scary mute men encased in blue BYENZOMARRA latex actually do to entertain. That said, any act that has a residency in Vegas and a worldwide tour taking in every Enormo-dome in sight must This May is set to be a creative extravaganza spilling out far across the surely be doing something right (forget Riverdance for a minute), and wide city we call home. With more traditional venues and open houses so it was I made my way to The O2 arena convinced I was going to begging to be visited, there is almost too much to see. enjoy myself without knowing exactly why. Thirty seconds in and I was already vindicated (well done me). The OPEN HOUSES show opens in gripping style with the BMG silhouetted behind a white Starting with the open houses at 1A 14 Grafton Street Kemp Town, canvas while strobey-type lighting effects as powerful as a biblical where there is a variety of local artists, including Rebecca Yates and lightning storm rain down from above. The canvas disappears to reveal her vivid, challenging portraiture in mixed media; Hanna Cesek with the eponymous stars already hard at work on an array of futuristic poppish graffiti-style stencils; percussion instruments that resemble an air-conditioning system Jennifer Evans’s figurative oil designed by a pissed-up Philippe Starck. paintings that realistically capture life Big screens either side of the stage ensure you don’t miss a trick and while evoking the atmosphere of a
S passing moment – my contemporary N A V A
E figurative artist with leanings towards
R E
F the bestial – and the mythological and I N N
E vibrant prints by Brighton-based J photographer Hartingale.
At Lick on Gardner Street, Starchild, who has been making waves in the UK contemporary and urban art scene with vibrant, eclectic work, is preparing to blow your mind in a frozen-yoghurt shop.
AQUA (Artist Quarter Under the Arches) on Madeira Drive, east of the pier, is a collective of renowned painters, sculptors and photographers, including well-known locals Sara Abbott and Grant De Jonge.
also inform you of the narrative for the evening. The premise of the N Following the 2008 acclaimed Mass in O I
How To Be A Megastar show is pretty much just that – the boys take T A Clermont Church, which featured 58 G E order of a DVD instructing them how to be famous and earnestly take R paintings from 30 artists displayed in the G N the audience through the gamut of rock clichés in their quest to O pews, CONGREGATION will follow the same C become stars. Strangely compelling instructions in rock star and crowd theme at St Paul’s Church, a truly beautiful etiquette had your normally reticent correspondent waving his arms in Anglo Catholic church built more than 150 the air like he just didn’t care, mainly because everyone else was doing years ago right in the centre of Brighton near it, but also because the request was loaded with the knowing wit that the bottom of West Street. It will be open permeates the entire show. Elsewhere in the evening, unsuspecting every day during the first three weeks in May, members of the audience have their belongings scrutinised by handheld with five examples of my work included among cameras, marshmallows are hurled repeatedly into mouths (yes, you the many. read that part correctly) and all three group members combine artfully to play the ‘drumbone’. Artist Residence, 33 Regency Square, is a hotel-cum-gallery with All of this plays out against a muscular soundtrack performed by a 12- exhibition space set up on its ground floor, which is in the process of strong band that, while a bit US-generic-rock for my taste, are tighter being developed into a larger space in the coming year. A tall, elegant than Michael Owen’s hamstrings – indeed, it feels slightly unfair to Regency townhouse gazes across the iconic West Pier, and behind its refer to the other musicians onstage as the backing band, such is their traditional façade there are walls to be hung upon, doors to be painted contribution to the performance. The banging and shaking of strange on (two already courtesy of me) and rooms gradually being themed and objects culminates in a thumping rendition of Donna Summer’s I Feel individually decorated. I will be showing a number of mixed-media Love, which again had everyone well and truly waving their arms... you images in a solo show (May 1–14). get the idea. It’s a great climax to a unique show, and while I left the arena now knowing what these strange men do, I was none the wiser Finally, we reach Fabrica, where about what to call it: techno-vaudeville maybe, or guerrilla-mime? there is a truly international Certainly very entertaining. experience until May 24, with seven The Blue Man Group bring their inspired percussive weirdness to the of ANISH KAPOOR’s works on show Brighton Centre on Thursday May 14. At £39.50 tickets ain’t cheap, throughout the city. Beginning with but you’re getting top-notch entertainment and production values that Blood Relations, a collaboration seldom make their way to us poor folk in the provinces. David Hodgson with novelist Salman Rushdie, 1000 Names 1979–80, and Music Boxes, More information at www.howtobeamegastar.com a collaboration between Kapoor and Ticketmaster 0870 534 4444, www.ticketmaster.co.uk composer Brian Elias, completing S N
O the exhibition in the main gallery. I T A
L This is fast followed by WIN TICKETS FOR BLUE MAN SHOW E R
D Dismemberment Of Jeanne D’Arc at
WIN TWO TICKETS for the Brighton Centre performance including a O O
L The Old Municipal Market, Sky meet and greet with the artists after the show. Just send answers to B the following question on a post card to: Blue Man, Gscene, 111 Mirror at the Pavilion Gardens, Western Rd, Hove, (including your C-Curve at The Chattri on the South Downs, and see the installation phone number). In which Las Vegas Imagined Monochrome (for ages 16-plus) at The Basement for a mere Hotel does the Blue Man Group appear? £12, with tickets available in advance from the Festival box office.
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 52 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT
CLASSICAL being a tribute to Brazilian style through stretched tonality composer Henrique Oswald, and bitonality in the String Trio NOTES whose Estudo-Scherzo for piano (1944) and borderline atonality in BYNICKBOSTON follows on this disc. This actually the Duo For provides a welcome relief from the Viola And REVIEWS recording from the Frauenkirche, intensity of Hartke, to which we Piano (1968), JONATHAN DOVE’s (b 1959) 21st Dresden, has pros and cons. The return with the angular fourth before opera The Adventures Of sound (I expect even more so on piece in the selection. Then in the returning to a Pinocchio has been released on SACD) definitely gives a feel of the Sonata For Piano, we get a more tonally DVD, in its premiere staging by large church space with a combination of jazz dance rhythms relaxed style in Opera North. Alasdair resounding echo. However, this, and minimalism bookended by the String Quintet. The performers Middleton’s libretto is much closer combined with rather approximate dramatic chordal writing. The are clearly immersed in her sound to the original English pronunciation, means that longest work on the disc is The world, and these are strong story by Carlo a lot of the words are quite King Of The Sun for violin, viola, performances of works that I hope Collodi, and unintelligible – you’ll need the cello and piano. It contains the will find a more secure place in consequently is text. In the Old Testament story, same broad mix of musical the repertoire as a result. much darker than Jeptha prays to God for victory elements, yet also has some more Court Lane Music CLM37601 the sanitised before going into battle, promising lyrical writing in the middle Disney version. to sacrifice the first person he movements, with a sense of line to Dove’s music is sees on his return. Of course, he the music that I found lacking stimulating, and this is what kept wins the battle – but who’s the elsewhere. There is a fine line my interest here. While I can see first person he sees? His daughter between versatility in a composer that this would be an accessible Iphis, so no happy ending. and the absence of an identifiable introduction to opera for kids, I However, Handel’s librettist voice. However, the performances found the slightly pantomime feel Thomas Morell was liberal (if not are highly committed, with Xak to proceedings a bit wearing at particularly enlightened) in his Bjerken on piano performing interpretation; Iphis fairs slightly throughout with other members of better, as the Angel intervenes the Los Angeles Piano Quartet, and Jeptha instead dedicates his among others, joining him. daughter to God to remain a virgin Chandos CHAN10513 Another lesser-known English for the rest of her life – not a composer, EUGENE GOOSSENS huge improvement! The soloists (1893–1962), was better know as are strong, particularly Markus a conductor, yet he studied Schäfer as Jeptha (with the best composition under Stanford at the times – the darker parts of the English) and Patrick Van Goethem IMOGEN HOLST Royal College of Music in the early story carried more weight, and as (Hamor, Iphis’s beloved). The choir 20th century and composed a a result there is more depth to the makes a great sound but the substantial output of works characters at these points. acoustics muddy its precision in throughout his life. On this disc, However, the overall performance the faster choruses. The orchestra the last recorded by conductor is excellent: chorus and orchestra is excellent – sprightly and full of Richard Hickox (with the are very strong, and Victoria character. Carus 83.422 IMOGEN HOLST (1907–1984) has Melbourne Symphony Orchestra) Simmonds as Pinocchio is been somewhat overshadowed by before his death last year, we have outstanding, on stage for almost her father Gustav but releases such Goossens’ Symphony No.1, a the whole time and carrying the as this will ensure her music is not dramatic and emphatic work, full momentum of the story brilliantly. forgotten. Court Lane Music brings of menace and moodiness. The Other soloists include an excellent some of her string chamber works Phantasy Concerto is an engaging Mary Plazas (the Blue Fairy) and to CD for the first time. The works work, with Howard Shelley Jonathan Summers convincing as span her career, from the pastoral (piano) making a great advocate Geppetto. Opus Arte OA1005D Phantasy Quartet of 1928, right for its freer chromaticism. A great through to the String Quintet of legacy to Richard Hickox’s In this 250th-anniversary year 1982. Interestingly, her music dedication to strong yet forgotten there’s a lot of HANDEL to be had seems to almost come full circle, English repertoire. and some overlooked works are moving from a lyrical, modal early Chandos CHSA5068 fortunately getting an outing. Here we have his last oratorio, STEPHEN HARTKE (b 1952) was CONCERTS new to me and on the basis of this Jeptha, from the Dresdner I gave my highlights of the Brighton Festival last issue, but check out new release of his piano and Barockorchester and the www.brightonfestival.org for full listings and any chamber music, I’m still not sure Kammerchor der Frauenkirche, last-minute tickets. However, the Fringe Festival how to place his music. The under Matthias Grünert. This live also has lots of classical music on offer – I make it opening piece, The Horse With
GARY COOPER 35 different concerts to choose from. Look out for a The Lavender Eye, for piano, series of Beethoven Chamber Music at the Chapel violin and clarinet, is incredibly Royal (May 5, 12, 19); spiky, harsh and rhythmic apart classical guitar music from very brief moments of from Spyros Dendrinos at lyricism from the clarinet in the Brighton Unitarian Church (May 23, 24); and third movement. The four Gary Cooper (fortepiano) with members of the selections from Post-Modern SPYROS DENDRINOS Hanover Band in Haydn and Mozart at The Homages are a strange mixture of Old Market (May 17), to name just a few. pure atonality, dreamy Satie and jazzy chromaticism, the third Email feedback, reviews, events: [email protected]
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE OUT & ABOUT 53
“Broadway is in a bit of a downward spiral at the moment. There have been 12 shows closed recently but here in the UK I think people who are suffering with the recession see theatre as a form of escapism – we don’t appear to be affected theatre-wise like the US. Theatre is a huge industry in the UK and it brings in a lot of money to the economy.”
Stephen’s career has been one of success and a high visibility. He trained at London Studio Centre for three years to become a dancer. His first performance was with Maisie Trollette and the Trollettes (as the Ugly Sisters) in the panto Cinderella at Tunbridge Wells, where he first got his Equity card. Aged 19, while still studying, he got into two major West End shows: Evita (1984) and 42nd Street (1985). “I was obsessed by the whole dance experience. I absolutely love what I do and it never really feels like work. Sometimes I find it hard to believe that I get flown all over the world to do something so enjoyable.
“One of my most memorable stage musicals I was involved with was Acorn Antiques, directed by Trevor Nunn, working alongside Julie Walters and Victoria Wood and arranging the choreography for them. They are both geniuses – it was like a masterclass in comedy. It can be hard on occasion to get good dancers to dance terribly as part of their characters, but the cast of Acorn Antiques managed to pull it of very A SPOONFUL easily – it was hilarious in places. We had so much fun in the process.” Stephen grew up on a council estate, which he says gave him the impetus to succeed in his chosen profession. His mother was a dance OF STEPHEN MEAR teacher and it is her he thanks for his own progress. Being dyslexic at He’s choreographed shows on Broadway school is never easy for anyone but, as Stephen says, it enabled him to and the West End. He counts Victoria Wood put all his efforts into dance. “I was useless at school; the only thing I could achieve and become good at was tap dancing. Originally I and Julie Walters among his friends and wanted to be a draughtsman. Goodness knows how the buildings would he works closely with fellow choreographer have come out,” he says, laughing. “After winning local dance events, Matthew Bourne. Paul Disney met up with I decided to take up dance professionally. I’ve never looked back.” the Olivier Award-winning Stephen Mear But it’s not all about theatre. Stephen has created the choreography Stephen Mear is remarkably relaxed. He’s just got back from Chicago, for two of the UK’s top bands: Oasis with The Importance Of Being Idle with no apparent jetlag. He was flown over to make sure the current and Goldfrapp’s Number 1. “When I was asked to work with Oasis and production of Mary Poppins in that city is running to the same high Goldfrapp, I was a bit nervous remembering everything I’d heard about standards that won him and Matthew Bourne the Olivier Award. them. Oasis in particular seemed to have a bit of a wild reputation, but I found them to be people with real talent who loved getting involved Born in Loughborough in 1964, Stephen has been a Brighton resident in and getting the shoot done all in good humour. Goldfrapp were very since 2004. “I love living here in Brighton with my partner,” he says. on the ball and it was a pleasure to work with them.” “I’ve always wanted to live here. I have a beautiful apartment that overlooks the sea. It’s also very handy for the Chichester Festival, Being a Brighton resident, Stephen says he is surprised that the city where I have become an associate director.” does not have a repertory theatre. “I’m often amazed at the talent here in Brighton & Hove,” he says. “I know so many actors, directors and As an associate director of the festival, Stephen has signed up for just about every other professional performer who lives here, and it three years and gets to do more choreography and even direct a new just doesn’t make sense not to have one. show. “Last year we put on Funny Girl and The Music Man. I have choreographed five shows in Chichester over the years: Putting It “It’s quite funny if you board the first carriage on the 11.06pm train Together (2001), Just So (2004), How To Succeed In Business Without from Victoria to Brighton that we call the ‘Showbiz Express’. It’s packed Really Trying (2005) and Funny Girl and The Music Man (2008),” he with actors and stage people returning to Brighton from their shows. explains. “So it just seemed very natural becoming an associate There is more than enough talent here in Brighton to have a rep director because, after all, choreography is a form of directing in itself. theatre. We just need to get our act together to make it all possible.” My role involves reviewing scripts and selecting the best to appear at the Festival, as well as putting names forward and being able to direct This year, Stephen is doing the choreography for Hello Dolly – first a show for next year’s festival.” produced on Broadway in 1964 – at the Regent’s Park Open Air Theatre. “We’re casting actors as we speak, but I can confirm Samantha Spiro,” The Chichester Festival was first opened by Leslie Evershed-Martin in he says. “It has been one of my dreams to work in this theatre, as it is 1962 and its inaugural artistic director was Laurence Olivier, so a most magical experience to watch a musical outdoors in the summer. Stephen is in very good company indeed. This year he has worked with Everyone will look gorgeous on that open-air stage on a summer’s Nikki Wollaston on Oklahoma and he believes the Chichester Festival evening. Let’s hope the weather improves on last year’s season!” rivals the National Theatre as a centre of excellence. • Chichester Festival Theatre, Wellington Road, Chichester PO19 6AP. “We have so much talent here in the UK,” says Stephen. “I don’t really Box office: 01243 781312; 2009 festival: 11 Mar–3 Oct. know why that is, but when you look at the size of our country, it • HELLO DOLLY, Regent’s Park Open Air Theatre, Inner Circle, London really is amazing that we can produce such high-quality actors. Maybe NW1 4NR. Box office: 0844 826 4242, 30 July–12 Sep. it all harks back to Shakespeare, but British actors are very well looked • Look out for Stephen’s choreography on VICTORIA WOOD’S CHRISTMAS up to and praised in the US. And, of course, all the US actors love SPECIAL – it promises to be one of the highlights of the year. coming over to perform in the West End.
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 54 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT CHOIR BOYS FOOD BYROGERTOFTS
WE HAD A DREAM A few years ago I was present at the inception of the Brighton Gay Men’s Chorus. Our dream and fantasy at the time was to create a social group for gay men who wanted to sing together and, as everyone knows, the chorus has been a huge success. Over time, some of our dreams and fantasies did become reality. We’ve performed publicly many times supporting our community, were watched by millions on BBC One in Last Choir Standing, met celebrities, become recording artists for two CDs and gave a private performance for the Indian prince His Highness Manvendra Singh Gohil – well, maybe it wasn’t so private, as BBC Three was filming the moment for the very successful programme Undercover Princes.
Watching the change that happened once the possibility of ‘stardom’ entered our social singing world was enlightening. Overnight we had to become dancers, singers and entertainers. Once the cameras and choreographers arrived, so our dreams and fantasies blossomed. Bitten by the bug, we were aware of the possibility of something life- changing happening. We were in a national competition, with the public watching us and people stopping us in the street and saying, “Saw your chorus on TV the other night”.
It didn’t take long to realise that maybe this ‘fame’ thing wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. It was relentless hard work with tough deadlines and little flexibility. It was also exciting and good fun, and acted like emotional superglue for those taking part. The camaraderie, banter, support and the looking out for one another was so tangible you could have wrapped it up and put it in a box. FISHERMAN’S REST Like most things in life, change happens and thank goodness it does. Gscene was invited last month to see Dave Lynn at the Fisherman’s Our chorus has changed and has many more members. Musically our Rest popular Sunday cabaret lunch. We sat down to eat at 4pm. The repertoire is expanding. But! What hasn’t changed is the willingness food was excellent, with starters including smoked salmon, soup, and of the chorus to embrace new people who come along wanting to sing, Parma ham and melon.A sorbet course followed and for main course to fulfil their dreams and fantasies. we had the choice of roast beef, chicken, fish and chips, mushroom I mentioned to the man I’ve shared my life with for the past 32 years pie or Thai curry, all with mounds of that this month’s article was entitled Dreams and Fantasies. Soaking fresh vegetables. Desserts and in the bath, he looked at me and said: “Bet you’re going to check out coffee followed, along with what Freud and start with his theories on dreams.” must be the best cheeseboard in any Brighton restaurant. In fact, I hadn’t contemplated the sleeping kind of dreams and At 7pm everyone moved into the main fantasies at all, and was simply thinking along the lines of a chorus dining area for the cabaret. Dave line of gay men singing and being on stage with all the spotlights and Lynn was on good form and everyone cameras. Add to that the relentless quest that many men and women left well fed and well entertained. undertake for the chance of celebrity and the attention that brings The Fisherman’s Rest is not the largest and you’ve got my line of thought. He roared with laughter and said, space for doing a cabaret lunch but its intimacy reminds me of the “So am I still your dream and fantasy?” original supper clubs in London in the early 1970s. It works very well and is worth a visit. Everyone mucks in and the service is first class We both fell about laughing. After all, he’s gone from being a fit and efficient. The five-course lunch and coffee is just £19.50 and the young man with broad shoulders and a slim waist to a very wine prices are very reasonable, starting at £9.95. If you want to comfortable, well-padded, interesting man, and you know what? arrive early, there are happy hour bar prices from 2 to 4pm. Sitting in our bathroom just looking at him lying there reading, I secretly thought to myself, “Yeah you’re still my dream and fantasy.” This month’s cabaret lunch dates are Sunday May 3 with Lady Imelda, and Sunday 17 with Dave Lynn and Maisie Trollette. Best to The Brighton Gay Men’s Chorus will be performing at the Brighton make a reservation for these popular events, so call 01273 323888. Fringe Festival on Friday May 8 at 10pm in the spectacular Sundown James Ledward Show Bar, the green by St Peter’s Church, York Place, Brighton. NEW STEINE BISTRO Following last month’s excursion to the New Steine Bistro, I can now report the next Supper Club is at 7.30pm on Thursday May 14. The Brighton Gay Men’s Chorus always welcomes new members. Entitled Sussex Produce Meets French Cuisine, it’s hosted by Henry For membership enquiries, email Thomas at [email protected] Butler (he’s the wine man). They’re also having a French Meets or call 07968 853625. For any other enquiries email Rod at English Recital on Saturday May 23 at 7.30pm, with Muriel [email protected], call 01273 721314 or visit Jacquinet singing French songs and chef Jean-Marc preparing Sussex www.singbrighton.com fayre. Both events must be booked in advance – call 01273 685146. Morham White
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www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 56 GSCENE OUT & ABOUT
Plot: A black comedy centred around a TV weather girl and FILM the two very different men who BYMICHAELHOOTMAN pursue her. Word on net: “A triangular O’HORTEN romcom... until the lovers hurtle Dir: Bent Hamer headlong to self-destruction.” I Stars: Baard Owe, Espen Skjønberg “Pleasantly disturbing, nominally Plot: Drama focusing on a life- voyeuristic romp in the territory what they’ve always been: sex, changing moment in 67-year-old Chabrol knows best.” I “A spry drugs, rock ‘n’ roll, fashion, train engineer Odd Horten’s piece of work from a 78-year-old football and fighting. existence: the occasion of his master.” I “Compellingly bitter Word on net: “It’s effectively a retirement. salvo about class, power and tragic romance: one boy for Word on net: “Spare, droll, quirky movie... great to see a film where privilege.” football violence; another boy for average age of actors is their mid-60s.” I “Truly hypnotic experience the first.” I “Focuses on an though slightly dense with metaphor.” I “The antidote to the wealth of MANAGEMENT uncomfortable friendship that quick-edited, violent, loud-soundtracked films... a gentle, authentic Dir: Stephen Belber has unrequited homoerotic look at ageing.” I “An offbeat coming-of-(late)-age film that asks that Stars: Jennifer Aniston, Woody passion on one side, dissolute familiar question of what to do with one’s life.” I “Hamer’s ability to Harrelson, Fred Ward ambitionlessness on the other.” combine humour with humanity makes O’Horten worth the ride.” Plot: A travelling art saleswoman I “Quite magnificent and tries to shake off a flaky motel remarkable movie about love, manager who falls for her and friendship, class and violence.” CHÉRI of movie is nothing less than won’t leave her alone. Dir: Stephen Frears human life and how it works.” Word on net: “Laid-back, sweet ALSO OUT... Stars: Michelle Pfeiffer, Kathy I “Strangely compelling After the critical drubbing of The Bates, Rupert Friend though maddening, overstuffed, Da Vinci Code, director Ron Plot: The son of a courtesan overambitious and self-indulgent.” Howard and Tom Hanks are back retreats into a fantasy world after I “Kaufman seems to have for more Dan Brown-inspired being forced to end his crammed every idea he’s ever had nonsense in ANGELS & DEMONS. about life, art and that enigma This time there’s help on hand whose name is Woman into a from Ewan McGregor and Stellan single totemic work.” I “Wildly Skarsgård. I In a bumper month ambitious, wildly confusing... for unwanted sequels, Ben Stiller, an existential freak-out on an movie... pretty good for an Owen Wilson and Robin Williams epic scale.” Aniston-based romcom.” I “Weird star in NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM: shift from romance to off-the- BATTLE OF THE SMITHSONIAN. SOUNDS LIKE TEEN SPIRIT wall comedy unbalances movie.” relationship with the older woman Dir: Jamie Jay Johnson I “Slightly better than Jennifer who educated him in the ways Plot: Documentary about the Aniston’s last, but that’s hardly of love. From the novel by Colette. junior version of the Eurovision saying much.” Word on net: “Beautifully cast, occasionally very funny – in short, AWAYDAYS a delight.” I “Smart and lushly Dir: Pat Holden romantic adaptation of a glorious Stars: Stephen Graham, Nicky melodrama.” I “Great work in all Bell, Liam Boyle departments, especially Alexandre Plot: On the Wirral in the grim I TORMENTED is a Brit comedy- Desplat’s melancholy score.” early years of Margaret Thatcher’s horror with Alex Pettyfer and April I “Breezy, bittersweet fondant premiership, the opportunities for Pearson about a bullied teenager fancy of a film.” Song Contest, where contestants thrill-seeking young men looking who comes back from the dead to are aged between ten and 15 and to escape the 9-to-5 drudgery are take revenge on his classmates. SYNECDOCHE, NEW YORK all write their own songs. Dir: Charlie Kaufman Word on net: “The music is so-so, Stars: Philip Seymour Hoffman, but the stories are all so FILM COMPETITION heartbreakingly adorable that it’s Catherine Keener, Sadie Goldstein JJ Abrams’s (Lost, Cloverfield) hard not to be riveted.” “Think Plot: A theatre director struggles I update of STAR TREK stars Chris Spellbound but with extroverted with his work and the women in Pine and Winona Ryder, with Simon performers instead of weird his life while he attempts to Pegg as Scotty. The film charts the nerds.” “Delightful, not only create a life-size replica of New I early days of the Enterprise – back because its kids are (surprise!) so York inside a warehouse as part of in the bad old days when Klingons cute, but because the competition his new play. were evil and NBC was worried that is unbeatably, garishly colourful.” Word on net: “A film with the a kiss between Kirk and Uhura “The earnest creative naivete is richness of great fiction... subject I would offend those in the Deep South. endearing, the personalities even To win two tickets to the Odeon Brighton, answer the following more so... very funny narration question and send to Gscene Competition, 111 Western Road, Hove, carries movie along nicely.” BN3 1DD: William Shatner’s first starring role was in A GIRL CUT IN TWO the film Incubus – but what, linguistically, marks the movie out as unique? Dir: Claude Chabrol Stars: Ludivine Sagnier, Benoît APRIL COMPETITION: Goodfellas Magimel, François Berléand
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Two DVD releases from Peccadillo SHOPPING Pictures well worth checking out: BOYS ON FILM is a collection of WITHMICHAELHOOTMAN nine gay shorts from around the world. Highlights include Summer, Cardome (47a St James’s Street, 01273 692916) has a great selection which is an erotic, humorous of Banksy graffiti canvas prints including Ballon Girl (102cm x 76cm) depiction of young love; Gay £105, and He Loves Me (76cm x 51cm), £65. Other sizes and images Zombie, a riotous horror-comedy; available are Kray Twins, Lover, Stop And Search, Bomb Girl, Fallen Le Weekend, a bittersweet tale of Angel, Pink Ape, Che The Man, Kiss Cop, Flower Thrower, One Nation a young straight man in Paris; Under CCTV and more. Buy three and get third or smallest half price! Scarred, a Hitchcockian psychological thriller, and VGL Hung!, which rounds the collection off nicely with a sweet and sexy fairy tale for the computer age. An indispensable look at gay lives from around the world – it’s like having an international gay film festival in your own home. A LOVE TO HIDE is an intelligent, subtly moving look at a gay couple in Nazi- occupied France. One of the couple, Jean (Jeremie Renier), makes the brave decision to help out a Jewish girl he’s known since childhood. The film is tautly directly, finely scripted and features committed performances from a talented cast. MH
The BFI is releasing Pasolini’s TRILOGY OF LIFE on three separate DVDs. The trilogy comprises the director’s take on Boccaccio’s Decameron, Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales and The Arabian Nights. If I had to describe the films in a word it would probably be ‘bawdy’, as they embrace the human body (and occasionally its products) with a gusto and shamelessness that are positively medieval. Some of the stories trail off with no apparent ending while others give a proper twist. In fact, it’s hard to think of a better ending than scores of friars being AussieBum summer 2009 swimwear collection, £33, shot out of the devil’s arse in Hell – if M Night Shyamalan had closed Prowler (112 St James’s Street, 01273 683680) The Happening with that image, the film might not have been such a critical disaster. Cinema at its most vibrant and sensual – it’s also great fun. MH
Prowler (112 St James’s Street, 01273 363880) has a hot new selection of DVDs on offer this month, including SLOPPY SECONDS (£29.99), directed by Ian Rawlings and Sean Storm.A bearbacking DVD featuring, among others, newcomer Devon Michael, who has a lovely smile and a huge cock and takes it up the arse like a rabbit, and Chris Neal, pierced, hung like a donkey for a white man and looking like a tattooed Greek god. Includes something for everyone, including a leather scene and man with piercings who loves himself.
HUNG (£24.99), is a compilation of some of the biggest and fattest cocks in the Bareback Boy Series, the PR says. Includes scenes from Barebacking Backpackers, Barebacking Farm Boys, Barebacking Campers, Barebacking Swimmers and Barebacking Doublefuckers. Large cocks, skinny bodies and action a bit on the slow side.
FRISBEE (£29.99), produced in association with BelAmi, is a storyline DVD with subtitles, shot mainly outdoors on the mountains, on the ski slopes and by the beach. Some lovely shots of sheep. Pretty models but action stiff. JL
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Marine Parade, Brighton £225,000 Regency Square, Brighton £850 pcm PRICE REDUCED. Two bedroom second floor flat in a well maintained building on the Unfurnished large one double bedroom top floor flat in a regency square with direct sea seafront in Kemp Town. The property is well located for the City centre and the shops, view. The property has been recently renovated to a high standard. Kitchen equipped cafe bars and restaurants on St. James's Street. Accommodation comprises: entrance with electric oven and hob, washing machine, dish washer. Bathroom has a white suite hallway, living room with bay window, kitchen, two double bedrooms and bathroom. with shower over bath. Good built in storage. Located on a seafront garden square on There are sea views from the living room and master bedroom. the Brighton Hove borders.
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HOVEE STTATION N
43 LON DYKE RD DON RD PORTLAND RD 37 ELM GROVE 46 SACKVILLE RD GOLDSMID RD SEVEN BRIGHTON DIALS STATION LEWES RD
T 42 35 THE DRIVE 48 6 GEORGE S NEW CHURCH RD 34 CHURCH RD PALMERIA 36 D RD 44 SQUARE NORTH RD
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AVE 31 47
9 GRAND PARADE 1ST WESTERN RD 10 QUEENS RD 2 MONTPELIER RD KINGSWAY 7 NORTH ST EDWARD ST PUBS & BARS 46 ELECTRONIC DISCO G Funky Buddha, 169 Kings Rd Arches 1 AMSTERDAM KINGS RD 40 T ST 22 GHETTO ST JAMES STREET 11–12 Marine Parade, 688825 WES 26 OLD STEINE 129 St James’ St, 622424 23 2 ANGEL 11 Montpelier Rd, 07964 702748 46 G LOUNGE 43 Providence Pl, www.g-lounge.com WESTST PIER 46 MARINE 3 AQUARIUM PARADE 6 Steine St, 605525 24 REVENGE 32 Old Steine, 606064 5 BULLDOG TAVERN 31 St James’ St, 684097 25 SUNDAY SUNDAE @ AUDIO BRIGHTONONO PIER 10 Marine Pde 6 BRIGHTON TAVERN 100 Gloucester Rd, 680365 26 WILD FRUIT @ TRU EDWARD ST 78 West St, 327083 ROYAL 16 7 CALEDONIAN BAR PAVILLION 15 26 Oriental Pl, 323087 HOTELS 8 CHARLES ST BAR G 8 Marine Parade, 624091 1 AMSTERDAM 11–12 Marine Pde, 688825 9 CHURCH STREET 112 Church St, 606864 27 GULLIVERS HOTEL GEORGE ST 12a New Steine, 695415 11 DR BRIGHTONS PRINCES ST 16 Kings Road, 328765 13 LEGENDS HOTEL NOR 17 31 Marine Pde, 624462 TH 10 GROSVENOR ST 45 16 Western St, 770712 7 MARINA WEST HOTEL 26 Oriental Pl, 323087 45 KINGS ARMS 56 George St, 681573 28 NEW STEINE HOTEL ST JAMES STREET 10/11 New Steine, 681546 35 22 5 12 R-BAR 38 21 7 Marine Pde, 608133 G SHOPS 33 13 LEGENDS BAR 30 CARDOME 18 30 31 Marine Pde, 624462 47a St James’ St, 692916 OLD STEINE 41 14 MARINE TAVERN 31 FLORIAN 14
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BROAD ST 28 MANCHESTER ST
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Great, I thought. That looks a bit more aesthetically pleasing than my JAQ’S MONTHLY usual dribbling dream state. But I still woke up with drool and a crick. And, obviously, my night wasn’t so silent, what with the sound of the black hole cracking open and the dogs talking drivel.
CASTLES IN THE AIR It must be so much simpler being a dog and knowing that the only dream you’re ever going to have is that one where you’re chasing rabbits and your paws twitch a lot. Or, in the case of one mutt I saw DOGS, FREUD, MANSIONS... recently on YouTube, your paws twitch a lot then you leap up and run MY DREAMS BOLDLY GO WHERE into a wall. Sleeprunning – that’s something I’m never likely to suffer I DAREN’T, SAYS JAQ BAYLES from. And I’m now wondering whether rabbits dream of being chased by dogs or do they just dream of grazing peacefully on grassy downland. And then wake up and go to graze peacefully on grassy “Dreams can come true,” warbled songstress Gabrielle in her 1993 downland? They won’t be troubled by dreams of aliens, I’m sure (as chart-topper, Dreams, followed by a line that remained totally Philip K Dick obviously was when he posed the question: Do Androids incomprehensible to me until I Googled the lyrics this morning (“Look Dream Of Electric Sheep? in his 1968 sci-fi novel). Or being trapped in at me babe, I’m with you,” as it transpires). a huge mansion with many tiny corridors that go nowhere or end up on a cliff edge. Yes. I probably need help… And that’s the thing about dreams: they’re utterly incomprehensible most of the time too. Take last night, for example. I dreamt that aliens But why do dreams seem so logical while you’re actually dreaming arrived at my flat via a black hole and gave my dogs the power of them? Theories abound, of course, and I once studied Freud’s thoughts speech. Cool, you might think, but all the dogs would tell me was that on the matter in The Interpretation Of Dreams. Much as I’m a fan of the one of them likes watching Star Trek. And let me tell you, THAT doesn’t good doctor (for Heaven’s sake, happen in real life – she always sleeps through it. It would have been he prescribed cocaine for his nice to hear that the dogs loved our walks in the woods or were really patients!), I can’t be arsed to pleased with the colour of their bedding, but no. One of them just said, go into detail here (for which “I like Star Trek.” read, ‘can’t remember’). Suffice it to say, it wouldn’t have been a good idea to tell him you’d “I dreamt that aliens arrived at been dreaming about trains and tunnels. Or flying. Or toothache. my flat via a black hole and gave He’d no doubt have had a field day with my mansion. my dogs the power of speech. I’ve always fancied being able Cool, you might think, but all the to dream to order – you know, like the inhabitants of Aldous dogs would tell me was that one Huxley’s Brave New World. How great would that be? Dystopia? I think not! Dose me up on Soma and of them likes watching Star Trek” I’d be a happy bunny. Not the kind that was about to be chased through its dreams by dogs, mind. So what was that all about? Were I the paranoid type I would have wondered whether my new Silentnight memory foam pillow had been The best dreams are always the ones you can’t get back into. The sabotaged by the Argos back-of-store team who, for a laugh, had pre- number of times I’ve woken just at the wrong moment in a fabulous loaded it with someone else’s memories just to mess with my nocturnal dream only to fall asleep again and end up dreaming of mansions. But musings – but the fact is, my dreams never make any sense in the cold if I wake up from a nightmare I’ll be straight back in it again when I light of day anyway. Much like Gabrielle’s lyrics. And, by the way, it was drift back off. Bah! the picture of the laydee on the front of the pillow packaging that seduced me into buying the memory foam pillow – there she is, I’m hoping the memory foam pillow will come into its own next time I stretching out in a blissful way, eyes shut, mouth curved in a gentle dream I’m rich and famous with a yacht, a string of racehorses, an smile, obviously as comfy as an old slipper. Alpha Spider and a mansion… uh oh! Maybe not.
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trapped for days, gasping painfully and possibly drowning. So I would SHARPWORDS hardly think that was a dream holiday, would I?
I’d be thinking I should have bought a safe (shallow) Jacuzzi or a TV REALITY Nordic ski trainer that doesn’t wrench the joints. Or an ISA. But perhaps my financial dream of having something nestled away for my impending lonely and poverty-stricken retirement would be smacked WHY DO SOME OF US DREAM IN HIGH- against the balls of the financiers who would snatch it away and DEFINITION, 99-INCH COLOUR WHEN scuttle off to a lavish life of not working and gaining more than I WE CAN’T AFFORD IT, ASKS DEL SHARP could ever get from working. Also, of course, my dream can be bought on the high street. I’ve noticed for some time a store near where I live that has all manner of I could be mistaken here but I used to be under the impression that desirable goods, massive TVs being the most prominent. Trouble is – dreams were crazy experiences we had when we were asleep, where we or maybe there’s no trouble – this store offers weekly credit at an would end up flying naked through our workplace and doing extortionate rate, with the overall price of the item being cripplingly something unmentionable with someone we can’t stand, which then high. The very people who are lured into this shop of dreams are being results in a lurching stomach every time we see them when we’re bled in a way that can only cause sleepless nights at some point in awake. Or perhaps they’re sweet, wistful thoughts that involve a nice the future. They might be able to ‘buy’ their dream but why should a sandy beach and softly lapping waves. 99-inch television with surround sound be what they want so much? I was wrong. Dreams are, in fact, the voice of our consumer society instructing us to buy the latest gadgets and goods whether we need or “Surely it’s immoral that people want them. Look at the marketing of a ‘dream kitchen’, for instance. Like I would ever sit longing for such a thing! I may well wish I had with nothing and poor credit are still someone in mine, possibly cooking for me, but that’s quite another matter. It’s feeding me rather more than I need and obviously doing a encouraged to have the belief that good job on its own without another occupant. they really need to acquire things Dream house? Well, I do have a roof over my head and I’m grateful, so they can’t afford and be allowed a bigger one and all the bills that come with it is more the stuff of nightmares right now. to purchase at such high rates”
Dream holiday? Let’s see, I might well go to a wonderful place and The latest thing isn’t always so great. Surely it’s immoral that people actually enjoy it. But I’d come home again and realise how much with nothing and poor credit are still encouraged to have the belief money I’d spent. Then I might accept that I’d have to start saving for that they really need to acquire things they can’t afford and be another two years before I could ever leave the country again. Then I allowed to purchase at such high interest rates. How I love my 14 might get depressed and wonder what else could fill my time, not to inches of Technicolor (even if it’s wide in the other direction), and if I mention the terrible things that could’ve happened to me when away. can’t see the screen very well I just have to move the sofa closer, and Like plane crashes or a tragedy in the clear warm waters. What if I then it seems bigger. How easy is that? And think of how much money went to a secret underground cave and saw rare sparkling stones and I’ve saved too. ancient paintings and then it all collapsed on me? Crushed and But of course there’s something bigger than widescreen going on here. There is pressure for certain groups in our communities to have those dreams, and they’re the ones you can buy for a week at a time. “I want to be” and “I want to buy” seem to be the mantras these days, which I don’t honestly remember when I was young. But then the only luxury item around was a Rolf Harris Stylophone, which cost a small fortune or at least a week’s wage. I was given one at some point, because it was broken and not all the notes played, however, I did develop a deep sense of gratitude and improvisation.
Now fantasies... I always think fantasies are the things that can’t be bought, or if they can then it’s by the hour not the week and no you don’t get to take them home, or they just stay in your head. This is why, thankfully, we only kill people and aliens on our flat widescreen HD televisions or look at hugely violent movies.
I don’t know that much about the sex side of things but, really, from what I’ve seen, just organising a book club once a month is hard enough, let alone a party of writhing, willing participants on and around my sofa. Even if I managed that, I’d be fretting about the mess or whether I had enough gluten-free canapés.
It’s all very draining but I’ll tell you one of my fantasies – just a little one – and that’s to do with my regular shop (for everything) and M&S. Ha, one to look forward to I think. Until then I’ll see you in the checkout queue at Asbo.
Sweet dreams.
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE 67 WHAT’S STUDENT QUEERHERE? CAMPUS BYMAXATTITUDE BYLIAMCLINTON
THE FUCKING PHALLUS WAR ON BIAS When I fucked chicks as a dyke, I wasn’t into foreign phallic objects. I try not to watch programmes such as The Sex Education Show Vs But when I started stuffing one in my pants and feeling not Pornography, showing on Channel 4 as I write. They all follow the same disconnected from it, I started wanting to fuck in different ways. The routine of misinformation, finger-pointing and bias. The blurb for the chronology here is dubious: which came first I can’t tell you. But show is: “Britain is in a state of sexual meltdown and the most at risk things change. And it’s not often easy (or possibly helpful) to know are teenagers. STIs are increasing at an epidemic rate; 21 teenagers get why. But things change fast. pregnant every day but, most alarmingly, up to two-thirds of teens are receiving potentially harmful information and impressions about sex via The fact is, the female-to-male (FTM) surgeries currently available the accessibility, quantity and graphic nature of internet pornography.” aren’t that great. Even top surgery invariably leaves visible scars and the craftsmanship involved in phalloplasty – construction of a penis – is desperately inadequate. (And biological reasoning just doesn’t cut “This whole programme is nothing it. Hearts and hands are transplanted; the penis is not such a complex more than a witchhunt. Porn, when organ.) These are hard – and expensive – body modifications. And the results don’t pass. Whether or not this is a desirable outcome is up to broken down into its main components, each guy, but the fact is we don’t have the choice: there isn’t the is an entertainment industry” opportunity for transmen to pass in all the ways it is for transwomen. This is only the beginning. All too often FTM and MTF experiences are The programme soon becomes an all-out assault on pornography that conflated as ‘transsexuality’. There is a gender difference here, which blames the industry for all of the above problems. Anna Richardson crosses over as we do. travels to secondary schools asking blushing teenagers intimate questions about where they learnt about sex and their general views. My (lesbian) feminist upbringing taught me to loathe the penis and Many are uneducated about sex, answering that they learn most of its bearers. And I did. It also taught me to love the body I have. what they know from porn and their friends. This Anna Richardson is Which I also did. But is wanting to change that body in some way standing in a school, yet does she ask to see the sex-education anti-feminist? The curriculum? Or question the pupils on how useful it has been? The impossibility of female simple answer is no. Sex education is mandated on the school phallic power has been curriculum; if it were being taught properly then regardless of the challenged explicitly by download history of a teenage boy and the half-truths gained from it, photographer Catherine he would be corrected on a weekly basis by a trained teacher. The bias Opie in her series Being
ofELLEN this programme is staggering. And Having, a collection of brightly coloured The most laughable accusation of all is that pornography is somehow portraits of female-bodied linked to an increase in STIs and teen pregnancy. Since the breakout of masculine folk who gaze HIV among porn stars not too long ago, the industry has strict back at the viewer with regulations on using protection and getting tested. Leaving aside an intensity of strength bareback and other dangerous practices (which two consenting adults JAKE. CATHERINE OPIE, BEING & HAVING, 1991 and integrity that refuses have every right to enact), surely this shows the adult-film industry is to be objectified. The subversive potential of such a work and its far more forward-thinking than our school system. This, again, is not implications are explicated by Judith Butler in Bodies That Matter: mentioned. At one point in the programme Anna Richardson asks “The simultaneous acts of deprivileging the phallus and removing it several pupils if they talk to their parents about sex. Much giggling from the normative heterosexual form of exchange, and recirculating ensues, and a choral answer of “no” erupts. She laughs it off. Twenty and reprivileging it between women [sic – female bodies] deploys the minutes into the programme and rather than proving a case against the phallus to break the signifying chain in which it conventionally adult-film industry, all that has been made apparent is the catastrophic operates.” That is, the enactment of the female phallus rips down the failing of not only our school system but also the parents who put the structure it is supposed to represent (patriarchy and male power). kids through it. No wonder these kids’ parents can’t talk There is a long history of hostility and animosity between those who to their progeny about sex – change their bodies and those who think such an action reinforces they were most likely failed (sexist) notions of gender conformity. Woman-identified and transboi in the same way during their feminists are too often quick to defend their respective positions own school days. without considering the broader political ramifications. This makes sense: our bodies are on the line and the personal is (still) political. This whole programme is But we can – and need to – coalesce in finding the subversive nothing more than a potential of transformation. We desperately need transboi feminist witchhunt. Porn, when ontologies and politics of the body to be theorised. broken down into its main components, is an Butler continues: “Consider that ‘having’ the phallus can be symbolised entertainment industry. The by an arm, a tongue, a hand (or two), a knee, a thigh, a pelvic bone, movies made are no more an array of purposefully instrumentalised body-like things.” I think meant to be true to life than EastEnders or Doctor Who. If children many other tranny bois and transmen do. We don’t have much of a started hiding away in telephone boxes, would Channel 4 begin tearing choice but to recontextualise and reconfigure what we have into what them down? It’s far easier to blame a distant entity than to take stock we want it to be/mean. of one’s own life. Ms Richardson would do far more good documenting the difficulty parents have talking to their children about sex and how Keep dreaming, Max xx that can be changed for the good, than shouting “WITCH!”
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dream became a nightmare – but Jade lived the dream that millions of CRAIG’S THOUGHTS girls like her in the Western world would kill for. Rather than your exploits landing you in A&E, they get you into News Of The World.
Chantelle (remember her?), shrouded in the land of Z-List celebs from FEELING JADED? the word go, even won a contest to beat the Z-list of them all. With an intelligence desert between her ears not witnessed on television since, DREAM YOUR WAY OUT OF THE HELL well, Jade Goody, Chantelle, upon winning her temporary crown, announced to the watching millions that she was indeed “living the OF YOUR CRAP LIFE – MS GOODY dream”. Like Goody-new-shoes before her, she didn’t stop at the Big DID IT, SAYS CRAIG HANLON-SMITH Brother break; she even bagged herself a moody pop ‘star’ boyfriend/ husband and made a TV documentary about herself with the catchy Picture this: a country in the grip of recession, its inhabitants reeling title (you’re too good at this) Living The Dream. from the sense that they have all somehow unwittingly been shafted by the sitting government, and the one before, and the one before that In the midst of their embarrassing public gaffes and for all their avid and possibly the one before that too. Imagine a commuter train packed pointlessness, these two bimbettes, devoid of talent and purpose, with Les ashen-faced Misérables, alighting in the great grey smoke to simply followed a path well-trodden by the likes of Eva Perón and begin the slow march of the depressed penguins underground – Madonna Ciccone-Penn-Ritchie-Malawi before them. They had a dream, reminiscent of SS-led prisoners of war facing certain death, only took some measure of self-responsibility for swimming in pigshit, and marginally better dressed. Examine a GP’s waiting room with shrunken got the fuck out. patients exaggerating their sense of unwellness, their immediate fate in the hands of inadequate administration support; themselves beaten But poor Jade! She probably didn’t ever take – or indeed have – the with an electronic appointment system with a mind of its own. time to appreciate that our obsession with the front-page serialisation of her demise had precious little to do with Jade Goody. What we were Depressed yet? Your imagination has created a canvas now littered sickened or fascinated by, glued to or even mourning was the passing with a multitude of done-tos. A populace unable to take responsibility of our pointless selves into an oblivion where we never even tried to for itself and never far from a catalogue of events, people or live our dreams. Think of a world without celebrity flowers; you didn’t technologies to blame. Now isn’t that a calming feeling? To sit centre make Jade status but find yourself in the unfortunate position of stage, blameless and irresponsible. Marjorie from Moulsecoomb. You have two kids but you’re never sure where they are until the police bring them home twice a week. You used to work in Woolworths but now you don’t and you are diagnosed “Jade ’u’ likes are to be found in with incurable cancer at the age of 29. What was the point? Really, every West Street in every town on really, what was the point? every Friday night, clamouring Squatting in your depreciating physical stupor of commuter misery, angry, huffing, puffing the works (you know the one, if you’ve not been for their moment to be heard and him, you’ve seen him) each time the train goes into a tunnel because your signal goes or it becomes too dark to read your free shitty drinking their way to A&E” newspaper, getting a migraine every night because your diet has the nutritional value of a bagel in Auschwitz – what is the point? Really, My work/life is miserable because of the train company, the Tube, my really, what is the point? boss, the hours. My finances are broken because of Mr Brown, Mr Blair, Mr Major, Mr New Heals Catalogue. My children’s health is poor because We can judge and spit our bitter observations of stupid Jade from the TV company puts too much salt into their diet and despite working Bermondsey and I still do think her ‘career’ pointless, empty and at within the public services, I am unable to be pleasant to any of those I times unpleasant, but on her deathbed she knew she’d lived the dream. serve, as the computer won’t allow me to look said clients in the eye and empathise. What will you know? Happy with your lot? Dream a little dream of yourself, and make it happen. You’re the only one who can. If Jade Goody can... The death and resulting funeral furore of Jade Goody has once again given rise to the opportunity for the clowning masses to have their say. “She was one of us,” says Denise from Dagenham; “She achieved everything we never could,” growls toothless Tina from Tottenham, tramping all over the dry irony that Goody once earned her peanuts as a dental nurse. But in many ways I believe the subscribers to Take A Break and Loose Women to be right; ‘Our Jade’ was an everyman for our time. Embarrassing as it may be for the chattering educated classes that apparently don’t exist, Jade ’u’ likes are to be found in every West Street in every town on every Friday night, clamouring for their moment to be heard and drinking their way to A&E.
Jade had a dream and the land of reality TV allowed it to be played out. Crass as she was, she then began years of pushing as one dream after another led to the rise of yet another. When Jade Goody was picking her mother’s drug apparatus off the vomit-encrusted council- flat lino aged eight, she dreamt of a big house in Essex with fancy gates and the press following her every glamorous move – a princess for the noughties. We can mock her dream for being empty and devoid of intelligent ambition – we can even suggest that for a short time the
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE 69 DRBEALE’S PILLOW TALK SURGERY BYNICKHOLLOWAY
THE CURE FOR METRO/SEXUALITY LAST NIGHT I DREAMT I WENT TO MANDERLEY AGAIN In the immortal words of ABBA, “I have a dream”. I dream of a world I don’t imagine that the brain does things for no reason but every where my sexuality isn’t frowned upon or seen as a mental-health night when I close my lids I return to my roots. Down in deepest, problem or, worse still, the cause of HIV/Aids. Sadly, the more I open darkest Somerset with an outlandishly quirky view of my home town my eyes to the world around me, I realise it might be utterly quixotic through the eyes of Edgar Allan Poe, around every corner I’m waiting to think that this is possible or anything more than a mere fantasy. for Vincent Price to appear and say something like, “Pray speak quietly, every sound you make is exquisite agony to me”. We have the good fortune to live in a part of the world where sexuality is, at least in part, treated as nothing more than an My dreams, I suspect, are the result of my years of moving around individual’s choice of bed-partner, but even then I find myself forced from town to town without really putting any roots down. to endure the bile and vitriol of the narrow-minded. My latest dose arrived in a spectacular front-page headline courtesy of the Metro (I My sister is a master with a machete and tries desperately to kill me
hasten to add that this was BAZ LUHRMANN at every given opportunity, to the point where I once had to search supplied to me by the current my mother’s house, which was filled to the brim with dog carcases, to object of my affection –I find my own dog Sypher (that was horrific, vile and quite upsetting if personally steer clear of most I’m to be honest). I eventually found him alive and well but cowering tabloids): “Experts Still Try To Find under my sister’s bed. Ironically I was incredibly relieved and I didn’t ‘Cures’ For Gays”. even realise I liked him that much. My Kill Bill Uma Thurman-esque sister still tried to slice my head off my shoulders, though. As if it’s not bad enough that we’re not even referred to as people – just ‘gays’. The headline “Isn’t it strange that your psyche also seems to imply that chooses that time to dump a homosexuality may, in fact, be a disease and, worse still, that the “mental-health professionals”, most load of crap into your thoughts of whom “work for the NHS”, are “experts” despite the fact they when you least expect it?” appear to be going around trying to cure people of their sexuality. I don’t hold with the premonition claptrap, although I must concede I shall give the Metro credit where it’s due – the rest of the article is that we know very little about the brain and what it’s potentially relatively well balanced, offsetting this delightful quote from one of capable of, but I bloody well hope that’s not a vision of my future or our much loved ‘experts’: “The physical act for male homosexuals is I’m a goner. I know that some people wake and scribble down physically damaging and is the main reason in this country for everything their brain had to offer during the sleeping hours, but HIV/Aids. It’s also perverse…” doesn’t that just drag the imaginary into the real world? And quite honestly the last thing I want is to remember being hunted down like This mildly tautological ditty, clearly expressing a factual, medical some wounded animal by a crazed, axe-wielding lunatic sibling. opinion (my doctor frequently diagnoses me with a rather severe case of perversity – there’s a smashing cream for it these days) was Strangely, if I fall though the front door at 4am with some bloke and disputed by the marginally more sensible spokespeople at the his lager splashed all over my Prada and start to try and eat a doner Department of Health: “Homosexuality is not a mental disorder and kebab while chucking Stoli all over the kitchen and trying to ram a does not need treatment.” Marlboro in my gob and breaking a couple of glasses while falling over Sypher then crawling to my bedroom and passing out inches “I dream of a world where my before I’m in my bed – then my sleep is very calm and peaceful. No dreams of slaughter, no sexuality isn’t frowned upon or seen night sweats, no worries. as a mental-health problem or Obviously the next day is a totally different kettle of – worse still – the cause of HIV/Aids” fish, but I digress…
One of the unfortunate side-effects of this kind of journalism seems Isn’t it strange that your to be a surreal need to draw God into the equation. Religious figures psyche chooses that time to have a long history of being utterly fascinated by humanity’s sexual dump a load of crap into pastimes, often prescribing the ways in which we should be getting your thoughts when you down to business and who with, despite the fact that dolphins are least expect it? When you’re busy doing each other in the blow hole while gay swans settle down at your most vulnerable, to nest. So it’s no surprise that many of these therapists were innocent and peaceful, why treating people that felt they would “lose God”. Well, a good friend are things allowed to creep of mine has the pleasure of openly running a gay community church and slither into your head? and, in my opinion, is far closer to God than many of the religious And why is some big bucketful of hateful junk allowed to just be men that make it onto the very same front pages as this article. emptied into your subconscious? Because there isn’t a damn thing you can do about it. So, to end on another musical quote, dear ‘experts’ – unless you have your patients’ best interests at heart (rather than your own), I I may not be the second Mrs de Winter but I definitely know Mrs suggest you listen to the more literal words of Lily Allen: “Fuck you… Danvers and I don’t think I like her at all. Maybe she’s my very, very much.” subconscious interpretation of Sarah Palin. Scary.
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GO WILD! ALL IN THE MIND? As gardeners, we make a direct impact on our natural environment and How does one combat the wealthiest organisation in the world, which thus have the opportunity to play a crucial role in supporting our has sold us a fantasy for centuries? Not going to one of its retail native wildlife and the habitats that sustain it. Over the past century, outlets is a start, I suppose. The chain has sold millions a fantasy that the traditional British countryside has changed irrevocably. Experts there is a god and that what the organisation says must be followed. estimate that due to more industrialised farming practices and Hence its stance on the use of condoms is followed (too) religiously, encroaching urbanisation, more than 600 individual species are at risk while it amasses more wealth in art and property and grumbles about in the UK and others are in rapid decline. Saving species aside, other people’s tax havens. Of course, the Catholic Church isn’t alone in encouraging biodiversity by gardening organically and conscientiously selling us fanciful rubbish: all of them in that market sector do it. has other benefits too: wildlife to enjoy watching, tastier produce, reduced costs, and natural pest control to name but a few. The overall aim is to create a balanced, healthy food chain where both plants and “The fact of the matter is that helpful pests will flourish, and the more harmful pests can be kept every second we age and a at manageable levels by their natural predators. For instance, ladybirds feed on aphids, and frogs, toads and birds eat slugs and snails. cream won’t put a stop to that”
Not quite as damaging are the brands that sell the Peter Pan fantasy of everlasting youth, through so-called anti-ageing creams. The fact of the matter is that every second we age and a cream won’t put a stop to that. If I cared that much and had ever bought such rubbish in a pot, I would sue the makers for selling me a fanciful dream that didn’t stop me getting older by the second.
Allegedly, if you have a particularly small penis and dream of ever owning a Hummer (I think there’s one in Hove, Chris?) then you can feel better that there has been a claim that the ugly hunk of steel is FOXGLOVE NECTAR SPLENDOUR BUSY BEE POPPY IN FULL GLORY less taxing on the environment than a hybrid Prius. A-listers in MAKE A HAVEN FOR BIRDS & INSECTS Beverly Hills prefer Prius cars, allegedly, so I will allege there’s no BERRYLICIOUS FOR BIRDS Choose berry-bearing trees and shrubs such penis prob there then (hope not, Brad). as holly, ivy, viburnum, cotoneaster, pyracantha and skimmia. SEED IT ALL BEFORE Allow some plants like sunflowers and goldenrod Some brand-related fantasies just develop through the ether. Many in to go to seed to supply winter food. the African-American community in the US believe that ‘gin makes ya GO NATIVE Use native species and perennials such as mallow, sin’, as I was told once when running a focus group in Miami for foxgloves, yarrow, globe thistle and poppies to attract bees, and plant Tanqueray. Imagine my smile when Snoop Dog released a track called native trees such as crab apples and hawthorn. Gin And Juice, mentioning (once deciphered) the very brand I was TURF WAR TURNAROUND Why not turn a lawn that makes you yawn looking after. into a natural meadow that is a feast for the eye with native orchids, meadow flowers and butterflies. When I was a kid, I used to dream about and indulge in fantasies Dried grasses and rusty seed heads spurred by hyper-creative comic artists. So, I thought that one day offer aesthetic interest during cars would fly and we could all go to space. Don’t knock your dreams winter too. and fantasies. Want a LOG ON In a quiet corner or behind flying car? Within two your shed, pile up some old logs to years, you’ll be able to provide homes for insects and even buy such a thing: the a hedgehog or toad – both love to Terrafugia Transition. eat slugs and snails. And bookings are now being taken for Virgin WILDFLOWER MIX WATERING HOLE Provide water, whether it’s a small pond or simply Galactic’s space trips. a bowl, to allow birds and animals to drink and dragonflies to breed. When the temperatures are below freezing, fresh water available daily Of course ‘dream is vital for bird life. holiday’ is a much-used BOX CLEVER Add new wildlife-attracting features such as bird feeders, expression and, yes, it tables and nesting boxes to provide protection from preying cats. usually becomes a Also, food may be plentiful but in the absence of old trees, nesting reality for many. Mine places may be scarce. wouldn’t be future but past. I have, literally, dreamt of being on the SIMPLY THE PEST Look for organic alternatives to pesticides, inaugural BOAC Comet flight from London to Johannesburg in 1952 herbicides, fungicides and insecticides. Reduce weeds by regular hand and negotiating with fellow passengers on board as to where to stow weeding, applying mulch and using groundcover plants. my hat boxes and vanity case. If anyone sees a hat box in a charity shop, would they kindly call me? Since the demise of Hanningtons I You may have to forget formal lawns, conventionally clipped borders just don’t know where to go! and neatly deadheaded flowerbeds in order to become more wildlife- friendly, but it doesn’t mean you have to have a dishevelled-looking Finally, Dreams, the brand. The TV ads must be good otherwise I garden. On the contrary – you are giving your garden greater depth wouldn’t remember them, but I do feel for those poor people in the ad and meaning and adding year-round wonderment. who’ve bought a bed and now can’t afford the linen and a duvet. www.myspace.com/rachredgardening Hollow fibre, yes but hollow dreams?
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE 71 GAY MASEY WISDOM BYNEILMASEY BY GAY SOCRATES
MOVING YOUR MOUNTAINS WISE WORDS HANDED DOWN THE AGES I’ve always had a vivid imagination. Maybe it was a way of escaping When my partner caught me Googling ‘gay wisdom’, he said “Isn’t gay an impoverished childhood or maybe it was a sign of mental-health wisdom stuff like never wear Crimplene to a wedding?” issues! Either way, my imagination has no bounds. When our rich relatives visited I fantasised about driving their fast car, living in Not sure entirely why, but about six months ago I started to crave luxury, smoking hand-rolled Cuban cigars and owning fabulous homes something spiritual that wasn’t religious. I wondered if it would be all over the world. But this was far from my reality of living in a possible to find an individual or group who could help me ‘tend to the dysfunctional family, on the breadline, without prospects. Statistically, needs of my soul’. Now I’ve had some interesting debates with friends I was more likely to be working on the buses, being educated in a about whether there is a difference between mind and soul, but that’s school where only a handful of the 300 pupils achieved four GCSEs or for future columns, so if you can, just bear with me. I don’t mean soul more and with role models who were poor, low achievers. My school in a conventional religious sense, whatever a turn-off that might be to mates more interested in truancy than you. I mean soul in the sense of who you truly are stripped of the working a way out of there! expectations you have of yourself.
Facebook is marvellous for searching out old friends. Some relatively high achievers “Sweeping legal changes and newly from my school days have contacted me. acquired relative equality before There are those who did well in exams, went to uni and followed the conventional the law drives a chasm of difference route of career, marriage and kids. But comparatively, I’ve achieved far more in between young and old” every aspect of my life, in terms of career, As the years go by and I grow longer in the tooth, I’m increasingly financially, creatively, professionally and in spiritual growth. In my 20s aware of how difficult it can be to stay focused on being your true it was said that I’d lived the life of a 40-year-old and I should write a self. From birth, most people are saddled with the hopes, dreams, book. Now I’m in my 40s I’m writing that book (in fact, two!). expectations and vicarious aspirations of parents. Then come the rules and social expectations of school and friends. Most gay children will How have I got so far? Some call it dreams but I call it manifestation. also have experienced the discomfort of growing up in the context of a Some believe in the power of prayer – I believe in the power of homophobic religious belief system. Add to that the powerful messages thought. I’ve created my life and my world by my attitude and by bombarding us as adults from the media about what we should and controlling my thoughts. I was always chastised for wanting the best shouldn’t be and do, the influence of friends and the expectations and for thinking I could get it. I was told not to aim high but to occurring within more intimate relationships, and it’s not surprising apply for jobs ‘in my league’, to be virtuous but poor. In spite of all that ‘who you truly are’ gets lost, confused, confounded and frustrated. that I continued to fantasise about a better life. So I started to hunger for some “You’re in complete control of your guidance on how best to remain faithful to my true self. I then thoughts so why not think ‘good’ and became acutely aware that I was the think positively about what you want?” oldest gay person I knew. There were no straightforward ways in my life to I’ve had patches of unemployment, hardship and unhappiness. But in befriend any older gay guys who the same way I manifested these times, I could manifest my way out might be a source of that advice and of them using the power of attraction. The theory is that what you guidance. At the same time I was think is what you get, good or bad. You control your thoughts, so why beginning to feel more and more not think ‘good’ and positively about what you want? Build fleeting alienated from younger gay men, who seemed to be coming from a fantasies of that ultimate lifestyle, relationship or home into a daily different world to me in terms of their attitudes and ideas. It was as if focus. Write about it, visualise it and believe it and it will happen. I existed in this hermetically sealed generation pod with little chance to connect meaningfully with gay men from younger or older In 2004 I was under huge pressure in a job with a homophobic boss. I generations, and that didn’t seem right! had debts from an old business, a crap car and an average income (all of my own doing) but I knew I could change this. One aspect of this, It seems that the scope for the giving and receiving of trans- the car, is an illustration of how the law of attraction works. I thought generational advice within the gay community has become fairly a lot about having a brand-new car, which I had seemingly no hope of limited for lots of reasons. getting. I wrote down what I wanted: a Saab 93 convertible, with cream interior, five-spoke alloys, Bose audio system and all the bells Sweeping legal changes and newly acquired relative equality before the and whistles. I thought about it daily and asked my mind to achieve it law drives a chasm of difference between young and old. Media for me. In 2007 I not only had that exact car, but it was also being adulation of youth reinforces a culture of ageism. The ‘internet- paid for by my employer. I was head of a new business for a mortgage ification’ of social networking means that young and old will only cross lender when I had previously been told that I’d reached as far as I paths if an older guy subtracts 15 to 20 years from his Gaydar profile! could go in that industry. And I was earning three times the salary. So in the absence of a forum I began a blog (check it out at http://gaysocrates.blogspot.com). This is just one illustration of thousands of manifestations in my life. So forget the negativity of the media. Forget the recession, the doom Where are the gay sages of Brighton? Please speak to me! and gloom and start manifesting the best life possible. You can call it And to gay youth I ask, what do you need of your elders? Californian claptrap or fantasy if you like, but it works. Contact me at [email protected]
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 72 GSCENE VRON’S AIRWAVES VOICE BY MARCUS PATRICK
TRAINS OF THOUGHT TALL, DARK AND ELUSIVE Dreams are powerful. They reflect our deepest desires, fears, hopes and I’m in my house – or at least I think it’s my house. The sun is expectations. They open up our hidden inner selves so that we see streaming in through the open window and it’s warm and airy. ourselves as we really are, rather than the ‘face’ that we show to the Somewhere in the house is a man and even though I can’t see his world. They are so revealing that it can make for unsettling viewing, face, bizarrely, I know he has dark hair. I also know he is kind, funny, as dreams do not lie. In our sleep, the truth will out – and ‘out’ is the attractive, argumentative, patient and intelligent. But most operative word here. In my teens, long before I became aware of importantly, I know he really cares about me and that makes me feel identifying as lesbian, I can remember having vivid dreams about really good. women. They were mostly teachers: one in particular, for whom the attraction was emotional rather than physical. It was all very sweet and innocent, with much lingering outside the staffroom in the hope “Then the grim reality hits me that of catching a glimpse of Miss E. In my dreams it progressed to us this was, of course, a dream. He sharing a sofa and having tea, but no bedroom door in sight, let alone a rumpled duvet. A case of distance lends enchantment, perhaps? doesn’t exist and I’m disappointed”
As recurring dreams, they were clearly trying to tell me something But after a few minutes, I start to fret. Why can’t I see his face? If important. The fact that it took me several years to act upon the only I could work out where in the house he is, I would be able to message that was being relayed didn’t mean that I wasn’t listening, see him. But try as I might, it’s just not happening. I wander around nor did it lessen the significance of certain dreams. They acted as a going from room to room, becoming increasingly anxious, till finally, kind of safety valve, helping me come to terms with feelings that, at just on the point of giving up, I suddenly start from my slumbers. As the time, were socially unacceptable but intensely, inescapably erotic. I drift slowly back into consciousness, the feeling of contentment I continued, after leaving school, to dream – and fantasise – about stays with me for a while till I am totally awake. Then the grim other women: work colleagues, flatmates et al. It was a way of reality hits me that this was, of course, a dream. He doesn’t actually processing the situation, of coming out to myself. After all, I’m exist and I feel disappointed and a bit sad. talking of a time when there was no gay scene as such: just a massive, overcrowded closet. Now clearly this is symbolic of something. Maybe I have a subconscious fear of being burgled and having my laptop nicked. Maybe the nice man in the dream is a loss adjuster from the “As recurring dreams, they were insurance company, visiting to help me process my claim. Or, maybe I clearly trying to tell me something just want a boyfriend. When I discussed the dream with some of my single friends (which is most of them, unfortunately), I was surprised important. The fact that it took to find that a couple of them had had a similar dream. I’m sure that there are a couple more of them to be honest, but they just wouldn’t me several years to act upon the admit to it! message that was being relayed I’m not a great one for dreams really or didn’t mean that I wasn’t listening” I just can’t remember them, apart from this recurring one. So what is it about These days, I dream a lot about travelling. I find myself in transit, the notion of the tall, dark, handsome somewhere on public transport, usually a train, quite often the London man that seems to appeal so much? I Underground. I know – you’re probably thinking classic Freudian stuff: decided to consult the oracle that is all those tunnels with their naughty sexual connotations. But for me, Google for advice. Unfortunately, the WARREN G HARDING this recurring dream has another, quite different aspect to it. Being first thing it came up with was some claustrophobic, I never travel by Tube. Let me loose anywhere on the song lyrics from American poodle Northern Line and a panic attack is sure to follow. So I’m happy to rockers Heart from the 1980s. Not a stick with the buses – thanks to Ken Livingstone’s pay-before-you- good start really, scary perms aside. board and Oyster card system, journey times are speeded up no end. (If only a similar scheme could be introduced in Brighton & Hove... Next on the list: one-time universally slated American president Roger French please take note.) Warren G Harding. Here was a man who hit the top based purely on swarthy good looks, a pushy manager and very little else. My quest Interestingly, in my train dreams I remain calm and do not panic or for the dark-haired man wasn’t going well. feel pressurised. I am invariably going on quite a lengthy journey, starting in the outer suburbs and ending up in the City, with more and Then I stumbled upon a man with a very specific fantasy. His name is more people getting on at every stop. But somehow I cope, without Daniel Nevers and he lives in San Francisco. Not for him a hair colour feeling crowded. It’s the very opposite scenario from the one that I fetish, but something totally weird. It’s all in the name and a very envisage happening in real life. For a recurring dream, I find it quite specific one at that. You have to be an Eric. Or an Erick will do. Or reassuring. Maybe all that is needed to persuade me back on to the even an Eriq or an Eryk. I could go on, but you get the picture – it’s Tube again – that crucial, additional X-factor – would be the company very Eric-centric! Why is he so specific? Because a psychic told him of my ideal fantasy woman. that his Mr Right will be called, er, Eric. So if you’re an Eric and up for it, check out www.heygayeric.com and fill in the application form. It’s vital to hang on to our dreams (in the broadest sense) and live Good luck! life to the full. Professor Randy Pausch, when dying of cancer, talked – on a YouTube video – about revisiting childhood dreams. Summing up So now that I’ve put things into perspective, surely a bit of dark hair his lessons from life, his advice was, “Have fun... keep dreaming... be isn’t too much to ask for? a Tigger, not an Eeyore.”
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE 73 NETTY’S QUERYING QUEENIE WORLD BYQUEENJOSEPHINE
PANTS ON FIRE BAD OLD HAIR DAYS A study recently revealed that one in six Brits lies about their travel OK, so I’m 18 years old and off to start art college. I’m about to enter exploits. Fibs include name-dropping countries never visited and the most exciting period of my education so far, and just about to referencing sights unseen. My partner and I did it in Lesvos when we become ridiculously pretentious (though of course I’m completely boasted to the other holiday-makers that we’d been to the Petrified unaware of this now glitteringly obvious fact). My mum is teaching me Forest. In reality we drove there, visited the petrified loo (well, it was how to back-comb my hair so it’ll stand up vertically in a high wind by the time we’d finished with it) and went on to the nearest taverna for at least a week – she had a rock-solid beehive in the ’60s – and for a boozy lunch. while it ain’t very punk getting your mum to give you fright-wig hair I would never have been able to achieve my Siouxsie look without her At some time in our lives we’ve all frantic hair scraping and copious use of Boots perfume-free ozone- told porkies. In fact, the ability to destroying hairspray. lie at the right time is a sign of intelligence. It may ensure survival But despite my totally unique (not) appearance and the whole new or preserve the wellbeing of a liberating surroundings I was to encounter at my new bohemian place loved one. Although blisteringly of learning – Norwich School of Art (I know, I know – doesn’t sound honest about the world around too decadent but after a bloody Hertfordshire comprehensive, anything them, children learn to lie about smacked of naughtiness) – I was worried. Would I stand out? Would themselves in toddlerhood. My mum often reminds me of the time she my peers see me as an interesting butterfly, or would they just realise thought she could hear me jumping on the bed – something I was I’d made up this fantasy facade? That in real life I’d done well in my forbidden to do on pain of smack. When asked what I was doing, I A-levels because I’d worked quite hard and had had the same happily shouted down, “Nothing!” spectacularly dull boyfriend for two years, only splitting up because he Bounce, bounce, bounce… got bored of me? That the first record I’d bought was by Olivia Newton “OK, what are you NOT doing?” John, not T.Rex? And I’d only once gone to a charity shop? “I’m NOT jumping on the bed!” Bounce, bounce…
Brighton has more than its fair share of liars. When we moved here “Bizarrely, when any sensible soul my partner and I were struck by the fact that so many people seemed would’ve considered this potential to fantasise about what they did for a living and where they’d been in the world. I, for one, feel uneasy talking to someone whose yacht lesbianism an asset in the exotic is nicer than my house. peacock stakes, I was hiding it” Similarly, I can’t tell you the number of feigned-life-threatening- And I got rumbled. Made a few friends early on who seemed beguiled disease-ridden miscreants we’ve given counsel to, only to find out it’s by my charms because I was sooooo crazy that I wrote down my a scam for sympathy. Then we have the handymen who never turn up. dreams every morning and read them out, thus cementing my intrigue We waited in literally all weekend for a man last year who kept and surrealness! Strangely, at this time I’d realised that the crush I’d phoning to tell us he was on his way but was caught on the M27. By had on my best friend at school wasn’t just some schoolgirl thing, Sunday night I was standing looking in the mirror saying “Handyman” that what I was feeling was lust. But, bizarrely, when any sensible five times in the hope he would appear. Then he phoned and said his soul would’ve considered this potential lesbianism an asset in the wife had endometriosis and he was at the hospital with her. exotic peacock stakes, I was Unfortunately for him the truth hurt when I walked past the pub two hiding it. I was telling eager ears minutes later and saw him. He’d been on a typical Brighton all- all about last night’s weird gas- weekend drink and drug binge – BLOODY LIAR! mask dream, missing out the sexy lady-love bits with gay “Sometimes dubbed ‘the graveyard abandon.
of ambition’, Brighton’s drink and I was in the Black Lion when I drug culture fuels the fire of got caught. I’d swanned in, wearing a friend’s dad’s leather dishonesty at every possible turn” jacket and a false plait attached to my hair, when Clive made a I have my own theory as to why there are so many Pinocchios in beeline for me. At first all Brighton. Primarily it’s a fun town where anything goes, fantasy and compliments and drinks offers, he reality blur and it’s easy to get carried away on the carousel. People was, within half an hour, in utter hysterics, having ascertained the run to Brighton because it’s the end of the country and possibly a origins of ‘my’ hard-lass leathers, my hair ‘extension’ lying limply on fresh start. Like those of us who lie on holiday, Brighton’s seaside the floor, having dropped off after I’d said it was a remnant from my location lends itself readily to the feeling that life is one long long hair days. He called me a fake. Correct, I thought, mortified. vacation. Sometimes dubbed ‘the graveyard of ambition’, Brighton’s drink and drug culture fuels the fire of dishonesty at every possible Skip a few months and I’d forgotten all this. My made-up look was turn. Weave into this never-ending story the genuine cases of cemented into something I’d become. Less dreamscape, more the real delusional mental illness and you have the pantomime that is Queenie (though that name came later!). The lesbian I’d been Brighton. I take everything with a pinch of salt. dreaming of had come out into the open and I’d learnt to do my own hair. Fantasy to reality in under a year. Priceless! By the way, I met someone last month who actually described themselves as a pathological liar – do I believe them? xxxHRH
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 74 GSCENE SUCHI’S POSITIVE WORLD THINKING BY SUCHI CHATTERJEE BY GRAHAM HAMILTON
ONTO THE NEXT STAGE AN ALTERED STATE Stand Up To Hatred is the Mixed Blessings Theatre Group’s second Last night I dreamt that I woke up to find I was no longer HIV- play for the Brighton Fringe Festival. The first play, in 2008, debuted positive. What a miracle! My first instinct was to tell everyone. Rob, under the title of Let Justice Be Done. It looked at the abolition of my partner, was still sleeping so I decided to call my mum. “That’s slavery through the eyes of Dido Elizabeth Belle, a mixed-race young fantastic!” was her first response, followed by, “I guess you’d better woman who just happened to be the great-niece of the Earl of letter the benefits people know, as you won’t be able to claim DLA Mansfield, a powerful British judge who, in 1772, made the Somerset (Disability Living Allowance) any more.” She was right. I hadn’t Ruling that kick-started the abolition of thought of that. slavery in England. I called a few of my friends and they weren’t as overjoyed as I had Both plays were written jointly by myself expected. Their general response was, “I never think of you as having and Maureen Hicks, and we have made a HIV anyway.” This seemed a bit dismissive at first but I suppose it promise that we would endeavour to write was a good thought. Besides, they’ve never been in my shoes so I LET JUSTICE BE DONE about subjects that are sometimes shouldn’t really be surprised by their reaction. considered taboo or are often ignored because they are seen to be old hat or in the news too often to be taken seriously. “I sat and thought about some of the things I would be able to do now Stand Up To Hatred borrows its title from the Holocaust Memorial Trust’s 2009 theme that I was rid of this bloody disease” and follows the story of two 21st-century children, Caitlyn and Jamal, who learn Phone calls done, I wandered over to the mirror to inspect my new self. This was also disappointing. Somehow I had expected to look
DIDO ELIZABETH BELLE (LEFT) about the Holocaust via the experiences of two disabled 20th-century children, Sarah more youthful and full of life, but the reflection was exactly the same and Sam, and in doing so face the issue of bullying in their school. as yesterday. Still the same salt-and-peppered hair. Still the deep As with Let Justice Be Done, we have put a little sting in the tail. furrows etched in my forehead. Still the dark circles around my eyes. No change there. With Stand Up To Hatred, I have ‘borrowed’ events from history that actually took place in and around Europe during World War II. While Perhaps the changes would be more noticeable internally. I sat and all the characters in this play (unlike in Let Justice Be Done) are thought about some of the things I would be able to do now that I fictitious, what happened to them isn’t. People were deported from was rid of this bloody disease that had made me feel tired for all the Channel Islands to their deaths in concentration camps. Jersey these years. I was going to be my old self again. However, I found had thousands of ill-treated forced labourers living in its midst and that I was feeling just as tired as friendships between the captors and the captives were an everyday normal. How could this be? And fact of life. then the realisation came to me: I was now a lot older than the With regard to bullying in schools in the 21st century, I did extensive young man I had been when I had research on the web and got anecdotal stories and information from contracted this thing. Age, and children and teachers about bullying and the fear and desperation it not just my condition, had been can often instil in its young victims. slowing me down.
The Mixed Blessings Theatre Group is a non-profit organisation that At this point Rob woke up and I endeavours to bring together a diverse cross-section of people. Our told him the news. He was very group includes LGBT, BME, disabled and able-bodied members. We pleased for me and told me that it meet every Wednesday from 6.30 to 8.30pm in the community room would probably take time for us to of St James’s House, High Street, Brighton, BN2 1RW. adjust to this. I was puzzled by what he meant but as he explained, “We’ll have to start having Already we’re thinking about what our next play should be about. My protected sex. There’s no way that I’m gonna be the one to give you dear mother – She Who Shall Be Obeyed Without Question (and who this thing again.” still hasn’t told me how she got that job in the Manchester unofficial gay scene in the 1950s!) – has suggested that we look at forced and Of course, in my selfish joy I had forgotten that he was still positive. arranged marriages from the perspective of the LGBT and BME Shit! One of the main commonalities that had bound us together was communities. It’s a serious subject, but she says there is also some now gone. Rubbering up had always a problem for us both, hence darkly wonderful humour to be touched upon, and already the ideas how we had ended up positive in the first place. “At least now you are flowing for 2010. If anyone is interested in helping with this can be my carer,” he added. It sounded so unlike him to talk like future venture, please contact me! that. This dream was rapidly turning into a nightmare. I thought of being broke now with no help from the state, searching for a full- Stand Up To Hatred will have a two-day run at the time job, our sexless partnership and me running around checking Brighthelm Community Centre, North Road, Brighton on how he was and looking after him. Friday 8 and Saturday 9 May at 7pm. Entry is free, and it’s suitable for children aged 11 and above. Suddenly, I woke up for real this time. Thank heavens! Rob was asleep, but I didn’t care. I woke him up, told him about the dream FURTHER INFORMATION and we celebrated our lives with a damn good shagging. I may still www.mixedblessingstheatregroup.co.uk be positive but I love my life. I guess dreams make you think, so be [email protected] careful what you wish for – you just might get it, and not like it.
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE 75 TWISTED GILDEDGHETTO BYERICPAGE
ALL GUNN’S BLAZING END MENTAL HEALTH DISCRIMINATION So I’m halfway to 84 and still in need of thrills. Will I never grow up MindOut is partly funded through Time to Change to work towards and will I always be an insatiable sensualist in deep thrall to the next ending stigma towards people with mental-health issues. anecdote? Sometimes in the middle of the night, when I’m sipping absinthe with a former East German spy who’s currently working the Research shows how badly stigma can affect LGBT people’s mental festivals of Europe as a sword-swallowing stripper, I pause and wonder health. Not only stigma about sexuality and gender, but also stigma if there’s more to life than I can see, that beyond this mortal veil there from within the LGBT community towards those of us who struggle might be a para-sensualist realm, full of new spiritual delights of a with our mental health. more ethereal nature. Then I knock back another wee dram, relax and let rip a huge fart. Below are some of the campaign materials produced You can trust wind. For all my by Time to Change. If you sophisticated graces, I enjoy would like to get involved – flatulence. Usually I fart at the and there’s lots of ways to opera, in the middle of the quiet support the campaign – arias; while they are sotto voce I please take a look at the am basso profondo. website www.time-to- change.org.uk. I was reading a little local history the other day, about dear old If you have been affected by stigma about your mental health, or Martha Gunn, herself a prodigious would like to talk in confidence to an out LGBT worker about any farter. She once so impressed the other mental-health issues, please do contact MindOut on 01273 Prince Regent with a monumental 739847 (24-hour answerphone). MindOut offers independent, free expulsion of gas that he clapped information, advice, advocacy and a group work service to LGBT his hands in delight and gave her people with mental-health issues. a pension for the rest of her life. She took to wearing the royal crest in her gusset and telling all and sundry who would listen (and she had just as loud a voice) that she bottom-burped by appointment to His Majesty.
“She once so impressed the Prince Regent with a monumental expulsion of gas that he clapped his hands in delight and gave her a pension for the rest of her life”
There’s a wonderful painting of her in the museum and you can tell that she was letting rip just as the artist caught her expression. She’s the patron saint of seaside resorts. Many people think that dear old Martha Gunn invented the habit of sea-bathing, or ‘dipping’ as it was known to the sensation-seeking Regency gentry. However, I find it difficult to believe that any fat, rich twats overdressed in the sweaty rococo finery of that time would willingly climb into the back of a bathing carriage (like a garden shed on large wooden wheels) then allow themselves to be dragged by two poor overworked donkeys down the steep shelving of the beach. Meanwhile, they would undress inside, in the darkness of the violently heaving and rocking hut, put on a woollen smock, tie a rope around their waists and then get thrown into the sea – paying for the privilege through their gout-ridden noses.
There must be a more obvious reason – what else could she have been up to? With those gents, in the dark and private bathing machine for the best part of half an hour with a string of pretty maids in attendance. I wonder indeed. Her family still bring delight to the voluptuous gluttons, wanton epicureans and sybaritic hedonists of this fair city: her great (x 7) grandson has just opened a teashop right next to the Theatre Royal, where the Victorian whores used to gather to chip off their snatch pastry and smooth down their petticoats. But there’s none of that kind of thing any more. Just perfect tea, indulgent cakes and the kind of welcome that makes you want to be exquisite and never explain…
www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton 76 GSCENE WALL’S COMMUNITY NICEDREAM SAFETY BYMIKEWALL BYPCBOBBYNEWTON
THE POPE AND I INCIDENT REPORTS When I woke up this morning, all had changed. It was being reported During March, there were 17 incidents reported to Brighton & Hove on the news that Pope Benedict XVI had had a revelation. Police that were identified as being motivated by homophobia, bi-phobia or transphobia. Nine of these were recorded as the following crimes: Overnight an angel had visited him in his dreams. He had told him G Verbal abuse –5 G Assault –2 G Harassment –2 that he was doing a great job, however, he had a few facts wrong. He would have been allowed to continue on his path, as man does have free will, but his recent remarks that condoms ‘aggravate’ the problem TAKE CARE OF EACH OTHER of Aids in Africa had caught God’s attention. This may be a community safety column and not the theatre review The angel told Benedict that God wanted to but I couldn’t resist telling you about my recent visit to the West End. rectify a few matters. He was sorry that He It was opening night (well, matinee) and I was catching up with old had taken His eye off the ball. He had taken a friends: Mitzi, Felicia and Bernadette. Of course, I was little more than well-earned break. All that creation had taken a babe-in-arms back in 1994 when The Adventures Of Priscilla, Queen its toll so He decided to take two millennia to Of The Desert won her Oscar, took Cannes by storm and cleaned up at go on long-awaited holidays. While He was the box office across the globe. Has it really been 15 years? away things went a little pear-shaped. It wasn’t until Michael, His right-hand man, contacted Him to say, “Sir, For those who don’t know the story of the three drag queens crossing the shit’s hit the fan”, that God grasped the severity of the situation. the Australian Outback in a bus called Priscilla, shame on you! That How could humanity get a simple list of instructions so muddled in so film is part of your heritage. The reviews for the stage production are short a space of time? Hence the visit by the angel to poor Benedict. glowing, and the recurrent sentiment in what’s written about this This mess needed to be sorted – this guy was giving Him a bad name modern fairy tale is “heart-warming” and “touching”, such is the when he was supposed to be God’s representative on this planet. connection that those characters make with their audience.
So the message was delivered and this time the instructions were very I expect the show will be the next thing to do for a thousand raucous clear. Benedict was told that this time the guidelines were to be hen nights, and as a chick-flick-to-stage production there will written down and when the time came to translate them, that more undoubtedly be many a reluctant boyfriend or husband dragged along. care should be taken. God did not want this going wrong again due to Nevertheless, at the end, when an excited young boy jumps into an people interpreting things in their own way. So here it is. electric pink bus full of wigs, sequined gowns, show tunes and all the trappings of high camp, there won’t be a dry eye in the house. The When God said “Love thy neighbour as thyself”, He did in fact mean to reluctant boyfriend will explain that he got something in his eye, say exactly this. This simply means treat each other well, whether you some of that glitter stuff he thinks. No, he wasn’t welling up… are male or female, black or white, or of any sexual persuasion, just be nice to each other. He also wanted us to take care of our health. If And gay and trans and drag don’t come into the equation. They’re just there was an easy way of preventing the spread of HIV, go ahead and people who the audience have come to feel close to. They’ve use it. It also meant to respect each other and each other’s opinions. celebrated their triumphs, commiserated their sorrows, and now they God did also say, “And you, be ye fruitful, and multiply; bring forth share their hopes and fears for the future. As one critic put it: “A abundantly in the earth, and multiply therein”. God intended for a bit screening of ‘Priscilla’ would do more good than a hundred lectures to of common sense to be used here. Multiply yes, but don’t go crazy. high-school kids on the acceptance of diversity”. Take some simple advice: don’t make a mistake – cover that snake. There are so many great lines in Priscilla but one I find particularly The dream continued this way for quite some time. Benedict was given poignant is when Felicia has been the victim of a nasty transphobic a lot of advice to follow and a lot of information. This time it was assault at a bar in a ‘tough little mining town’. With stinging bruises idiotproof (God had recently discovered that George W Bush was in and shattered confidence, he finds solace in the arms of Bernadette, the White House). What in My name will happen next, He asked who muses: “It’s funny. We all sit around, mindlessly slagging off that Himself. Benedict, however, was a respected theologian and when he vile stinkhole of a city but, in its own strange way, it takes care of us. I awoke, he was amazed he hadn’t understood earlier. It was clear to don’t know if that ugly wall of suburbia’s been put there to stop them him now that his interpretation had only resulted in people the world getting in or us getting out. Don’t let it drag you down. Let it toughen over laughing at his recent babblings. He also realised that it was you up. I can only fight because I’ve learnt to. Being a man one day time to accept not only homosexuality, but also his and his staff’s and a woman the next isn’t an easy thing to do.” first-hand experience of it. It was time for two men to live together and love one another. His friends had all being doing it for years. It makes me think of Brighton. Not that it’s a ‘stinkhole of a city’, but a place where people can be themselves. I disagree with some of the I was astounded. This was all over the radio, TV and internet. People sentiment, though. It’s not the city that takes care of us, we have to rejoiced in the streets. People throughout the world, of all religions, take care of each other. It’s not a wall of suburbia keeping anyone in cultural backgrounds and sexuality were relieved to hear that one of or out that keeps us safe. We keep our community safe by reporting the world’s religious leaders had said such wonderful, realistic things. hate crime and homophobic incidents. If you’ve been subjected to homophobic abuse, don’t let it drag you down. Report it! This, of course, is a dream I had. This did not happen. But isn’t it a fun idea? The Pope’s recent statement on condoms made me very PC Bobby Newton is currently appearing at the Police Theatre, John angry. He has potentially damaged the work that has been done. HIV Street Brighton, in the role of LGBT Liaison Officer. For tickets... is at epidemic levels in parts of Africa. By his actions, the Pope has possibly condemned millions to death. I will leave you now with a G PC BOBBY NEWTON, LGBT Police Liaison Officer, 01273 665541 quote I read in a daily newspaper, from one of the cardinals: 07795 801979 or [email protected] “He’s shut up in his study. He’s a theologian, not an executive. A great G NICK ANTJOULE, LGBT Community Liaison Officer theologian may not necessarily have his finger on the pulse of reality.” 01273 665657 or [email protected] www.switchboard.org.uk/brighton GSCENE 77 LETTERS TO THE EDITOR HAVE YOUR SAY! SEND LETTERS TO: GSCENE 111, WESTERN RD, HOVE, BN3 1DD / [email protected]
GOLDEN HANDBAGS families. Especially not at a To be frank, I thought the show a dying breed. It’s about time My visit to this year’s Golden function aimed at and for the lacked laughs. Too much singing they all took a good look at Handbags Awards Show was much whole of the local lesbian and not enough comedy. However, I themselves and realised standards more pleasurable than last year. gay community. must congratulate Lola, who have to improve, to stop Thank you for listening to hosted brilliantly and gave us audiences dwindling and venues people’s comments made about This man and all the others like what few laughs there were. no longer booking them. the 2007 event. him conveniently ignore the fact Michael O’Donnell The Hilton Hotel ballroom was that the freedom they have today I have spoken to quite a few Former chauffeur to the stars warm, unlike last year when it has been fought for and hard people since the show and all Hove Park, Hove was freezing. The sound was won by those very men and have agreed with what I’ve said. great, there were no queues at women in that audience and The show does raise one hell of a This is a personal view and does the bar and the entertainment beyond, who he so casually used lot of money for charity and I do not reflect the position of Gscene line-up was more balanced with a as figures of fun and contempt. respect everyone who gives their magazine. As always, we give good representation of female The battle for our freedom is not time free for the charities but people the opportunity to vent singers. won – far from it. While he and please – make it more about the their views. Ed his like are basking in their awards than the cabaret. The gay comic in particular I current freedoms they are Andy Feest, SAME-SEX MARRIAGE found very funny and I loved the ignoring and oblivious to the real Queens Arms The momentum gathering in segment with the stars from threats that are building up Occidental countries for the Priscilla, Queen Of The Desert. against our community daily from WHAT A DRAG! proper recognition of same-sex I hope you raised a great deal of the religious zealots and bigots I’ve been fortunate enough to marriages is profound. Gay money for local groups and out there, whether they be have watched some of the all- populations have been repressed charities. Christian, Muslim, Jewish or time best cabaret acts from for too long, essentially living in Peter Adams, Hove whatever belief system they yesteryear, including Mrs an underground of ostracism and might have sold their minds to. Shufflewick, Lee Paris, Lily ridicule from those committed to GOLDEN GAFFE Savage, Dockyard Doris, Maisie the orthodoxy of ‘compulsory I’m sorry to have to write this The sooner he apologises to all of Trollette and Phil Starr, to name heterosexuality.’ letter after so much hard work us and finds another job, the but a few, but I have to say the and goodwill went into last better. Like all bullies he has current talent and potential There can be little doubt that the month’s Golden Handbag Awards. abused his position of temporary among the Brighton-based tide is beginning to turn with I am referring to the performer power, ie, the holding of a performers is awful. many countries adopting a far who stepped off the stage during microphone, to intimidate his Apart from Drag With No Name more liberal approach on marital his act and went over to the audience and his particular and Miss Jason, who are both freedom. Even in Catholic- table with the GEMS (Gay Elderly chosen victim, who had no other unique and funny at what they majority countries there is a Men’s Society) group. He then, option but to sit and take the do, most masquerade under their notable relaxing of the rules, under the thin guise of comedy, garbage he dished out in the ‘drag queen’ titles when they are where they now finally accept proceeded with a five-minute name of comedy. no more than game show/karaoke that things are not as black and period of what I can only I hope that if he ever sets foot in hosts at best. white as one would like to think describe as ageist insults towards Brighton again he is booed on the issue of who one marries. those at the table. offstage for the sad creature he They are feeding us the SOS diet The issue of gay marriage is I was angry and incensed at this has shown himself to be. (trade for ‘same old shit’) week in perhaps set to become the person’s complete lack of respect Yours is deep despair, week out. There’s very little biggest civil-rights issue of the for those he chose, without their Michael James, Brighton variety these days, no art in 21st century. permission, to be the stooges in telling a decent gag, and singing Maurice Fitzgerald, his act. GAY OSCARS the same songs time and time Shanbally, County Cork, I would like to offer my own again. Rep of Ireland It is because of the sacrifices opinion on this year’s Golden made by those in putting their Handbag Awards Show. It’s billed It’s a reflection, surely, when two DR BOYLE health, freedom and wellbeing on as the ‘gay Oscars’, so what I find of the top five in the recent Thank you for piece about Dr the line and their bravery in very disappointing is it seems to Golden Handbag Awards barely Helen Boyle featured in January standing out in the face of be more about the cabaret than ever perform in Brighton except Gscene, although I must say that enormous hostility from friends the actual awards. as subs or at fundraising events, I do not agree with your writer’s and family plus the whole weight Surely it would be much better to and it’s beyond me how their interpretation of her sexuality. of law, press and public opinion cut down on the cabaret by, say, conscience would allow them to May I add that if any reader is that this man today has the around 15 to 20 minutes so the campaign or put themselves interested in Dr Boyle’s work at freedom to stand on a public award-winners can say a few forward. (Maybe a Golden Dustbin the Lady Chichester Hospital, stage and make a living. words of thanks to all those Award next year would ruffle a then a fuller account can be None of us over 60 in that people who took the time and few feathers, and I would be found in my book, Women’s audience who were part and trouble to vote for them. happy to present it.) Hospitals In Brighton And Hove: parcel of the fight for freedom for The Lady Chichester And The New lesbians and gays fought for the It’s like ‘get on stage, smile for The overinflated egos of a few of Sussex Hospitals, published by right to be publicly disrespected the camera and get off’. the higher-profile performers, and Hastings Press, 2006, available and insulted in front of our It makes no sense to me at all their antics offstage especially from all bookshops, online, and friends, peers, partners and that the winners don’t get the after a drink, will I fear also from the library. opportunity to say anything. contribute to the slow demise of Val Brown, Hove
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LESBIAN&GAY LESBIAN LINK starting treatments or need support sticking Local social group offering friendship + social events to/changing current treatments. SERVICES Tel: 07594 578035 (eve) 01273 764200 [email protected] I Condom Male: Free condoms + lube by post for ACCESS 4 ALL LESBIAN & GAY AA gay + bisexual men in East + West Sussex. Up to LGBT disabled people’s forum. Safe + welcoming, 20 condoms per delivery. Confidential & discreet. 12 step self-help programme for those with alcohol support, activities, awareness. 01323 649927 (E Sussex), addictions. Meets every Sunday at 7.30pm Chapel Tel: 07981 170071 01273 764200 (W Sussex) for more infor or to Royal, North St, Brighton (side entrance). [email protected] place an order. Tel: 01273 203343 (general AA line) I Street Outreach Service (SOS): Street based ANYTHINGBUT… LGBT NA GROUP mobile HIV prevention project offering info, free Youth social support group for lesbian, gay, bi- Brighton based LGBT (welcomes others - non condoms+lube. Drop-In: Mon 2-6pm, Thurs 6-10pm sexual and anyone unsure of their sexuality restrictive) Narcotics Anonymous group. Meets every I Support Group for gay men living with HIV under 26, meets every other Wednesday. Fri from 6pm-7.30pm at 61 Ship St, BTN. who are not on medication. To attend meetings or Tel: 01323 649927 Tel: NA Helpline 604604 to find out more call Ben on 01273 764200 Email: [email protected] I Training and Education Services: RAINBOW FAMILIES info sessions, training courses ALLSORTS YOUTH PROJECT Support group for lesbian and/or gay parents. Drop-in for young people, under 26 years old, Tel: 07951 082013 UNISEX who are lesbian, gay, bisexual or unsure. 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