sign in sign up
<<
Home , Adam Oates, Alexander Steen, Andrew Desjardins, Andy Murray (ice hockey), Barret Jackman, Benn Ferriero

Volume 7, Issue 44 April 21, 2012

Four Dollars of Pure Street Cred Nothing In Moderation Established in 2005

By Brad Lee emotions. And their clear colors show. When a guy goes out of his way to not shake an opponent’s hand…well I’m not sure if it says There is only one guarantee tonight. The are not more about the guy who refuses to shake or the guy whose going to go quietly into the offseason. out-reached hand is ignored. But for just a moment, it gives us a If you were in this building three years ago when the glimpse inside the NHL fraternity. The guys on either team have Canucks eliminated the Blues in four games, St. Louis more in common than with almost anyone sitting the stands or gave its strongest performance in that fourth game. It went to watching on TV. Often they’ve been teammates in juniors, college, . They had chances to extend the series. And national and all-star teams. The hate subsides and the Vancouver played just a bit better and made the Blues victors want to congratulate the fallen on a good effort the first team eliminated from that ’s and the losers just want to go home. I think it’s . Well that can’t happen this year cowardly that other sports don’t end playoff because those motherfucking Red series the same way. Wings have already been sent packing. Can I These playoff games are odd to write for. get an Amen? Make no mistake, this will not There’s a lot of emotion and analysis packed be an easy game. around a small number of games in a short I have to admit, I’ve been anxious to drop period of time. When the game rolls around, the first puck since about 12:05 a.m. Friday everything has been covered. At least with this morning when the Blues finished off the series, the late starts have hampered some of Sharks 2-1, sending the series back here to that. The flip side is that this series is probably St. Louis with a 3-1 lead in hand. The Sharks are the most anonymous of all the first-round a cornered animal. They’ll claw, bite and scratch matchups. It doesn’t have a sexy, historic or really to stay alive. might even show up TM big market team. They’ve started and ended late. before the final five minutes of the game for a change and And then there’s that opinion that the Blues are score an actually meaningful . Okay, that might be an boring. I get it. Just don’t be surprised when the exaggeration. This is a rare opportunity we hold in our hands, Blues are on the verge of making another elimination soon friends. Only 12 times in their history dating back to the 1967-68 enough, Canadian media and people who think the Eastern season have the Blues closed out a series on home ice. The last Conference is better. time was actually the most recent time the Blues advanced in the Let’s talk about the B.J. Crombeen goal in the first period playoffs, at the end of the 2001-02 season. Thursday. Brandon is not a goal scorer. He is not paid to be a goal I love to see the end of a series. The joy on one side, the scorer. But he sure looked like a goal scorer Thursday night. On sudden anguish on the other reduce players to their basic human (Continued on page 26) Today’s Records, Injuries & News 2011-2012 Team Records Today’s Injuries: Today’s News & Notes:

Blues: Sharks:  are the first team 49 -22-11 (109 pts) 43-29-10 (96 pts) Blues: G Jaroslav Halak (lower body) is ejected from the playoffs with a Game 5 1st in Central 2nd in Pacific out, questionable, day-to-day, probable or loss last night. We know that you know 2nd in Western 7th in Western available. that already, we just wanted to see it in Season Series: Playoff Series: print.

4-0-0 Blues lead 3-1 Sharks: None to report.

Franchise Playoff Records Game Time editor, publisher and head Blues: Sharks: Head-To-Head: smart-ass-in-charge celebrating his birthday tonight. Which is why his kid is 141-170 68-76 11-11 buying him shots.

CAUTION: St. Louis Game Time contains extreme sarcasm and less-than-gentle language. But it is a hockey paper, so you should just fucking get over it. Volume 7, Issue 44 April 21, 2012

The last time I wrote an article for this space, I enough of them. brazenly guaranteed a Blues win. Which seems And not to get presumptive, but if the Blues St. Louis Game Time stupid because I have literally zero influence don’t away this lead, the rest of the Established: November 6, 2005 on the game. I certainly can’t play, I can’t help playoff picture is getting interesting too. St Louis, the coaches and if any of the players were to People have commented that they think the www.StLouisGameTime.com read this paper, they wouldn’t be looking at my first round this year has been so crazy because www..com/StLouisGameTime article for inspiration. Let’s be honest: if any of literally every team in the playoffs thinks they the players are reading the paper, they’re have a legitimate at winning the Stanley Godfather skipping to the dirty jokes and then scanning Cup this year. That seems to be bearing Jeffio the rest for curse words or their own out in the West, where the Kings are in names. the midst of pulling off an upset over Publisher & Editor-in-Chief But after just one game played at Vancouver, as are the Coyotes over Sean Gallagher that , I knew the Blues were lower-seeded but better talented [email protected] going to win. Because they are Chicago. The Wings, as you’ve simply the better team. The Sharks clearly already celebrated, are out at Coppy Editer won Game 1 because they were lucky enough the hands of the Predators. to get it to overtime, where anything can Maggie Ryan The common thread among the teams happen. Over the course of the average leading their series right now is that they all Distribution 60-minute game, though, the Blues are too big are winning with good defense and better John Nicolay and tough and, most importantly, committed, goaltending. All are using their “best” players to lose four out of seven to the Sharks. The Amy Benoist, Becky Brittingham, to shut down the other teams’ star offensive Clarence Walker coaching is better and the depth is better and studs. Get ready, because it’s coming; the goaltending is better. Which is why we are everyone is going to say that the teams that Columnists where we are tonight, hoping to see our team advance in the West are boring trap teams. Rick Ackerman, Joe Barker, close out a playoff series for the first time in 10 The Blues will be pointed at as the worst Nate the Great, Chris Gift, Brad Lee, years. offenders. Answer Man & Brian Weidler

Which is not to say that I’m guaranteeing People love to say it and they have been another win tonight – as we’ve said over and Contributors since Coach Cock took over – the Blues play Jeffio, Tyler Atwood, Jeff Browning, over, this should be the game that the Sharks boring trap hockey and it’s Hitchcock Hockey. Childhood Trauma, Melvin & Chris Reed put up their best effort of the series. This could You can assume that anyone who says that to Photographers be their last game of the year and that’s a long you isn’t watching the games. This team flight home if they lose. They’ll be coming as Angela Vincent doesn’t play the same game as his 1990’s hard as we’ve seen from them all year. So teams did, it’s just easier to grab onto Holistic Therapist guaranteeing a win tonight would just be little the stereotype and ride it. Hitchcock and the Patrick Shaw more than hopeful guessing. Blues (as well as the Coyotes and Predators), But the Blues are definitely winning this they’ll say, are killing hockey by strangling the Mission: series. Again, it’s no big leap to say that now, life out of the game. To keep on . . . you know . . . keepin’ on. That and we’d like to think we can, you as the Blues own the series three to one, but I disagree. Keep saying the Blues are know, be a good boyfriend or whatever. while San Jose has the manpower and the will playing a trap, but the Left Wing Lock and its to push back hard for one more game, they offspring are dead. Yes, the Blues like to play Rights & Permissions: don’t have the ability to do it for three games sort of a 1-3-1 across their blueline, but so do All material printed herein is copyrighted in a row. Honestly, watching the last three the Hawks and Wings and Canucks. The Blues and protected. Do not reprint without wins, the Blues looked like men against older, expressed, written permission from St. Louis Game Time, LLC. slower, less disciplined men. San Jose has (Continued on page 10) some good players, they just don’t have Logos & Photos Team logos and pictures used herein are by Sean Gallagher the property of the individual teams On The Concourse and/or the NHL and are used solely for identification and editorial purposes.

Today’s Weird Reference: “Why don’t we have one more drink and go down and cut that shark open?”

Today’s Fake Name For The Those West Coast games are Post-Game Call-In Show:

killing me. I took a nap in my I quit my job. Phu King I napped in the car the other day. shitter at work. GAME TIME Page 3

Top 11 Things We’ve Learned In The Playoffs

11. Done listening to Red Wings fans until October. Playoff payoffs 10. does want a good NHL career . First Period (True or False): 9. Don’t piss off Andy McDonald because he will 1. The most recent time two Blues goalies got wins in the step on your neck. With a cracked helmet, even. same post-season before this year was when Jon Casey 8. Not trading at the deadline could be replaced an injured in 1996. nominated for the Nobel Common Sense Prize. 2. The Blues have now won every division they have been in 7. Thornton’s playoff more ironic every day. exactly twice. 6. The beer in this building starts tasting twice as First Intermission (True or False): good the farther into April we go. Who knew? 3. The name of Quint’s boat in Jaws was “The Mackerel”. 5. Power Play Dance 100% more tolerable when the power play actually has some power to it. Second Period (Multiple Choice): 4. Baseball compared to hockey this time of year 4. Who has the worst post-season plus/minus mark: Joe could put cocaine addicts to sleep. Thornton, , Barret Jackman, or Michal Handzus? 3. You can be in your early 20s, playing defense in your first playoff series and still be awesome. 5. Of the following, who is the only player to score fewer 2. There is no shame in taking a nap in the goals than Patrik Berglund in a single Blues playoff series: bathroom stall at work after West Coast games. Todd Elik, Steve Leach, Jochen Hecht or Martin Rucinski? 1. is a magical wizard, has a deal Second Intermission (Multiple Choice): with the devil or is just really fucking good. 6. Brian Kelly would play the “Flipper” dad in the original TV series, but who played the original father: Chuck Connors, From the Empty Beer Cup of Brad Lee Chad Everett, Lloyd Bridges or Brian Keith? Third Period (Know it or Blow it): 7. What current Blue is tied for second for most career Pappy Say . . .

post-season overtime goals? Pappy say you never want your name used in 8. The Blues have played in 14 Game 7s. How many have they the news in the same sentence with the words won? “shallow grave.” 9. Half of the top eight career playoff scorers are Blues alumni. Name them. (Friend Jeffio’s Pappy Say on Facebook.) Overtime! 10. owns the career post-season record with 24 and is second with 23. Blues Jeffio’s Plager Playoff alumni are in the next three places. Name those three goalies. Joke of the Day

Bob Plager was always positive. He irritated his friends

with his eternal optimism. No matter how horrible the

is tied for fifth place with 14. with place fifth for tied is circumstance, he would always say, “It could have been

10. has 16 , 15 and Jacques Plante Plante Jacques and 15 Osgood Chris shutouts, 16 has Joseph Curtis 10. worse.” To cure him of his annoying habit, his friends

for seventh with 188. with seventh for decided to invent a situation so completely bad, so fourth with 214, is sixth with 190, and is tied tied is Gilmour Doug and 190, with sixth is Hull Brett 214, with fourth terrible, that even Plager could find no hope in it.

9. True. is first with 382 points, Glenn Anderson is is Anderson Glenn points, 382 with first is Gretzky Wayne True. 9. On the golf course one day, Noel Picard said, “Bob, time. - all 7 game in 8 -

8. The Blues are 6 are Blues The 8. did you hear about Tom? He came home last night,

career game winners. In first place with eight is . Joe is eight with place first In winners. game career found his wife in bed with another man, shot them both

7. and seven other players have four overtime overtime four have players other seven and Langenbrunner Jamie 7. and then turned the gun on himself.”

Connors. Chuck 6.

series. goal -

in six games in 1997. The other players all had a four a had all players other The 1997. in games six in “That’s awful,” said Plager, “But it could have been

5. Steve Leach scored three goals in 11 playoff games in 1,006 and none none and 1,006 in games playoff 11 in goals three scored Leach Steve 5. worse.”

Tkachuk. place second than worse 12 is 27 -

4. Joe Thornton’s minus Thornton’s Joe 4. “How in de hell,” asked Picard, “Could it have been

3. False. The boat was named Orca. Perhaps Quint was a Canucks fan? Canucks a was Quint Perhaps Orca. named was boat The False. 3. worse?”

championships. division Central

2. True. They have two Western, two Norris, two Smythe and now two two now and Smythe two Norris, two Western, two have They True. 2. “Well,” replied Plager, “If it happened the night

1. True. True. 1. before, I’d be dead now!”

We Want The Cup. Also, Beer.

Please enjoy your complimentary Jumbotron sign. Use responsibly. Or not. Your choice, really. GAME TIME Page 5

Also, Beer.

With Chris Gift

We Want

The Cup. Four things to touch on before moving on to Round 2. not sure when exactly I explained why it would make sense for This is probably somewhere around the 10th time I’ve the Blues to leave KMOX and go to WXOS 101.1 ESPN Radio, but mentioned in my column this year. Most of it was fairly recently. Bravo to the Blues and 101 ESPN for getting the time I’ve praised his work, but I think that well has run dry. an agreement hammered out to air tonight’s game on the FM At first I thought that the disciplinary role that he assumed this side. The station has been promoting the game since the season was going to be nothing but positive for the league. As a announcement was made on Tuesday, and I hope that former player who had been there, and had done most of what somewhere in the minds of both parties involved that they could he’d be ruling on, it seemed like a perfect situation for see this being groundwork laid for a potential long-term Shanahan. agreement. As we get closer and closer to the end of his first full season WXOS is producing its own pregame show leading up to and playoffs, it has become apparent that while he’s attempting tonight’s game, and after the game there will be a postgame to be as impartial as possible on his decisions and it isn’t show, and hopefully a Round 2 preview. The Blues seem content possible to fine or suspend on every controversial hit, it’s at KMOX, and WXOS doesn’t seem to be fawning over the Blues obvious that Shanahan isn’t the person who should be like KTRS did over the Cardinals before they acquired their rights ultimately responsible for supplementary discipline of players. prior to the 2006 season, but let’s hope both sides see the benefit of the Blues being on 101 ESPN. That responsibility should fall squarely and solely on the shoulders of . Not Brendan Shanahan, not a Brian Elliott tonight and probably the next game too. committee, not even deputy commissioner Bill Daly. Bettman I’d be willing to bet if Blues management was interviewed totally and Bettman alone. Roger Goodell has been judge, jury and off the record, they’re probably not all that upset that Jaroslav executioner for pretty much every wrongdoing on and off the Halak went down in Game 2 with his knee injury. His owie solved field since he was named commissioner of the NFL in 2006. a big problem for the Blues. Had Halak stayed healthy, how long David Stern has had the same burdens during his 28-year would Ken Hitchcock have gone before giving Elliott a start? tenure as the head of the NBA. Having on the bench to backup Elliott while Halak is on the mend in the press box during games is fine by me. If Neither Goodell nor Stern has ever played a game in the Elliott has a bad game, or gets sick, or just needs a night off, then leagues they run and Bettman hasn’t either. He’s impartial, he’s Allen goes upstairs, Elliott puts on the baseball hat for the night the face of the league, and most importantly, any decision he and Halak starts. makes will be made by the highest of authority figures in the league. Hitchcock and goaltending coach Corey Hirsch would have found a way for both the All-Star and the No. 1 The supplemental discipline has become such an issue in the goaltender to play, and don’t think they wouldn’t both be league that only the one true person who is in charge of the effective. I don’t think Hitch’s rule of the goaltender who gets the league should be making the decisions. shutout gets the next night’s start would work in the postseason. I don’t want to jinx the team, and in all honesty, I’m not It’s time to ride the hot hand. Until Ells isn’t hot, and don’t look one to believe in jinxes. But I did say in the first line of this at him letting up three in game three as not being hot, there’s no column that the Blues are going to move to Round 2. To the reason to rush Halak back. naked eye, it’s obvious that the Blues are faster team, they’re Chicago has to rotate and since the better coached team, and they’re the more talented team. neither of the two has become clear-cut number ones. Vancouver To put numbers with that, the Blues are outscoring San Jose for seems to be having have its annual or Corey the series 12-6. They are 6 of 16 (37.5%) with the man Schneider debate this time of year, and there are other decent advantage and have killed 13 of San Jose’s 15 power plays goaltending teams in the playoffs but no team has the talent the (86.7%). Blues do with Jerry and Ells, or Ells and Jerry if you prefer. Compare players. Look at pages 14 and 15. San Jose’s They’ve won the Jennings Trophy this year; is in defensive corps isn’t as good as the Blues’. Top to bottom the Ottawa because they’re so good; and don’t be surprised if these Blues have the advantage with the forwards, too. While the two don’t repeat the whole damn thing again next season. I’ve Sharks’ top line on paper—Joe Thornton between gotten to the point where after games when Tom Calhoun and Patrick Marleau—may have better stats and when clicking suggests, “Let’s meet the Bud Light ,” that it isn’t

can be just as good as the T.J. Oshie--David always the most objective election, but after Game 2 when both Perron line, they’re struggling this series and Todd McClellan Halak and Elliott were named stars, that fit. Fitting for the night, has started mixing up that line with the Martin Havlat-Ryan and fitting for the season. Clowe- line. The goaltending speaks for itself, no explanation is needed. On to Round 2.

The columns kind of run together these days so I’m Page 6

With Nate the Great

I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a shark with its back against the wall. look legit. So tonight is your night to go fucking crazy, because I’m not sure I’ve ever even seen a fish with its back against the tonight’s the night we advance. wall. What does it do with its fin? It gets bumped up against the Last night was also awesome, for a reason that’s near and wall, and that probably hurts a little. It at least makes the shark dear to my heart. Way back in January, when the Detroit Red uncomfortable. Plus, there are no walls in the sea. But put down Wings were still a team to be reckoned with, I wrote a little ditty, your beer for a second, because here it is (don’t worry, you don’t a section of which ended up on the Game Time website. That REALLY have to put down your beer). The little ditty went somethin’ like this: San Jose Sharks officially have their backs against the wall. Or the tank. Or the reef. “As much as they like to make har har Blues Whatever. fans jokes and think about how David Backes sucks (by the way, if he ever finds So let’s talk orders of business here, this out, he may destroy you, Death o’ frequenters of the Scottrade Drinkscotch Star-style), the Wings fans accidentally just Center Extraordinaire. On some nights, exposed their soft underbelly. Guess what, there are many orders of business. Most of Detroit cocksuckers – you just said this was them are dictated by your wife. Take out the a playoff-mentality game.” trash. Put the kid to bed. Hand me the remote. Some of them are dictated by your And then they all hit the comments boss. Get me that memo by Tuesday. Put a section – TWO HUNDRED THIRTY EIGHT cover on your TPS report. We’re gonna need comments! – to blow me the fuck away. The you to work the weekend. Yeah, Sunday too. Blues would be sunk by April, they said. Is Some are from your kids or your parents. there such a thing as a Blues fan, they asked. Tell me a bedtime story. Take your unruly One asshole even went as far as to post this kids home. I need $20. exact statement: “And as is typical involving a game with the words “playoffs” and Tonight, Blues fans, there is only one “St Louis” in the same sentence, the Blues order of business. If you’re in the house lost.” tonight and you’re reading Game Time, the first and only order of business is to be Don’t cry, , dummy Welp, you ugly motherfuckers, guess fucking loud. And I don’t mean loud like Red Wings fans still think you’re what? Joke’s on you. I’d gloat and dance whiny, that kind of hurts my ears loud. I good. around on Nick Lidstrom’s dead playoff want your hands to hurt after this game body and make funny jokes about how from clapping, and I want you to go to work Johan Franzen never showed up and about on MONDAY (not Sunday, because fuck your boss. That’s how some douchebag from Kansas tried to make a legitimate bullshit that you have to work Sundays) and have no voice case that the Red Wings’ defense was somehow superior to the whatsoever. I want you to get a little unruly. I want people to Predators’ even though Nashville had two defenders who were turn around to their friend and be like, “Jesus Christ, those better than the Wings’ best defenseman. I’d go on a profanity- people who read Game Time are fucking crazy.” laced tirade lined with fucks and assholes and talk about how you’re all 35-pound clitorises and about how the Blues’ coach Because we are. But I also kind of want everyone in the house won the cock fight – Hitch is greater than Bab. I’d talk about to be so crazy that no one even notices how crazy you’re being. how you talked a whole lotta shit from your humble home in At which point you need to go even crazier. or Ohio or someplace other than Detroit, only to get Because tonight, ladies and gentlemen, your St. Louis Blues skeeted the fuck all over. I really would do all that. could advance to the second round of the NHL playoffs for the But I have a playoff game to watch, so I won’t. Go fuck first time in a fucking long time. I’m not even going to google yourselves. and see when, because frankly it’s been too long. I was probably in high school. That shit’s cray. But the Blues are back, and they We Insult Because We Love. Or Hate. www.stlouisgametime.com GAME TIME Page 7

With Jeff Browning The Sharks do have some former Blues in their lineup. I just buddy, Brian Elliott. took until Game 4 to actually get them on the ice. Granted, The two former Sharks on the Blues haven’t fared much their addition did not help at all, so I’m not complaining. better. Kent Huskins has only played one game this series Michal Handzus played for the Blues himself. He does have lots of experience—48 postseason over a decade ago. His 1999-2000 games —thanks to long runs by the Sharks the past two seasons season—his second year in the league— and the Ducks a few years back. However, no goals and only remains his best season ever with 25 three assists in all that time. goals. But it was during that postseason Same story with Scott Nichol. He also played with the Sharks when the eighth-seeded Sharks defeated the the past two seasons, has racked up 44 playoff games, but only top Blues, and Handzus had next to nothing to contribute to has two points to show for it, both with San Jose. The only that series. In fact, Zeus’s playoff career has been very difference is he is actually playing now and does have a shabby, so maybe there is a reason the Sharks haven’t played presence out there. That is something not a single Shark player him. But while he hasn't had much second-season luck, all of can say this year. his former teams are doing well right now. In fact, it is very likely the Blues will play one or more of them. Everyone always talks about the bad years in the playoffs, but the Blues have had plenty of good years. Right after that If the Kings pull off the upset, the Blues will play the team one horrible first-round exit, the Blues and Sharks Handzus helped rebuild for the previous four years. But if were back at it in the 2001 playoffs. St. Louis Vancouver makes a miracle comeback, it could be Blues vs. made Sharks goalie look like a Coyotes, the team Handzus was first traded to for Keith joke, so much that he conveniently came Tkachuk. The Coyotes are making pretty good work of down with the “flu” when the heat was on. So Chicago, where Handzus spent eight games. And while I don’t the Sharks started their unknown third-stringer, want to look too far ahead, there could be a Blues/Flyers (in only his second career start), final. When then-Philly coach Ken Hitchcock acquired and he even managed to win a game. A few years later, he went Handzus in 2002, he referred to him as the Total Package. to and became a superstar. The Blues made him. But The other former Blue in San Jose is . the Sharks traded him for only a second rounder, and the There really isn’t much to say about him. I mean, when the Flames only needed him because their goalie, the great Roman Blues traded him late last season, did anyone even notice? Turek, went down. And there you go, Turek gave the Sharks one His only career playoff goal was quite the beauty though: the series win, Turek taketh away all of the Sharks’ future hopes. game winner in his first postseason game. But he has no That’s karma. chance of getting one past his fellow University of Wisconsin

With Melvin Playing at home 1-1 Polak gets a door 1-0 Playing on the road 2-0 Leading after the 1st 2-0 6:30 start times still suck 3-1 Tied after the 1st 1-1 They score first 3-0 Trailing after the 1st 0-0 Happy Meal takes it to another level 3-0 Shanahan makes no damn sense 3-1 They score 4 or more goals 1-0 Leading after the 2nd 3-0 Happy bday Peter Zezel 4-22-65 Tied after the 2nd 0-0 They score on the PP 3-1 Trailing after the 2nd 0-1 The other team scores on the PP 1-1 PTMFUS! 3-1 They score shorthanded 0-0 LoveForLokomotiv.com 3-1 Stewart still plays for us?!? Who knew? 3-1 Punch em in the face 1-0 The other team scores shorthanded 0-0 They are called for 7 or more penalties 1-0 A Blues players has multiple goals 0-1 Other team called for 7 or more penalties 1-0 An opposing player has multiple goals 0-0 They take 30 or more shots 1-1 It's Monday 1-0 They allow 30 or more shots 0-1 It's Thursday 1-1 Jaroslav Halak starts 1-1 It's Saturday 1-0 Brian "Missy" Elliott starts 2-0 Playing in April 3-1 Hot girls we have problems too 3-1 Thundersticks 1-0 We're just like you, except we're hot 3-1 Towels 0-1 The world needs to open their eyes 3-1 Kent Huskins Cares 3-1 And realize 3-1 Angellla looks good 0-0 We're not perfect 3-1 Reaves proves he belongs in the playoffs 0-1 And sometimes we lie 3-1 Page 8

With Rick Ackerman A lot has been made of the Cock’s comment about opposing leading scorer Patrick Marleau (28 goals, 57 points) and Jonathan teams not opening the Roman Polak door. That may very well Cheechoo (28 goals). An excellent defense was headed by be true, yet the San Jose Sharks made a bigger mistake by goaltender Evgeni Nabokov and defensemen Brad Stuart, Kyle opening the Andy McDonald door, and they have paid for it. McLaren and rookie . For the seventh-seeded After being physically goaded, harassed and assaulted in Game Blues, it was a struggle just to make the playoffs. Coach Joel 2, McDonald has come back to display the mental fortitude and Quenneville was fired in late February and replaced by Mike discipline necessary by scoring three goals (two on the power Kitchen, who compiled a 10-7-4 record to squeak into postseason play) and assisting on four others to lead the Blues to three play. victories against the club from California’s Silicon Valley. A Game 1 in San Jose was a defensive battle between fourth win tonight would end the series and see the Note Nabokov (26 saves) and Chris Osgood (28 saves), decided by Niko advance to the next round to face , if the Kings can Dimitrakos’ goal in the first overtime. Nabokov only gave up one close out the and send them back to hockey goal (a shorthanded effort by ) in Game 2, a 3-1 obscurity. Sharks victory highlighted by Marleau’s hat trick, two on the Yes, instead of reacting and responding to blatant charging power play and one shorthanded. and Keith and elbowing tactics by the Sharks with retribution and more Tkachuk spent most of the game in the box as San Jose violence, the Blues have instead chosen to punish San Jose by was awarded 13 power plays to the Blues’ seven. Kitchen observed, playing excellent defensive hockey and beating them on the “I don’t think they really gave the players a chance to play in Game scoreboard. The Note has more goals and shots in the series, in 2, and it kind of threw us off balance right from the start of the addition to winning more face-offs and blocking more shots; yet game. Some calls we deserved, and some calls weren’t strong calls perhaps the most significant statistic in Game 4 was the Blues on the referees’ part.” Reinhard Divis replaced Osgood in the third only allowing five giveaways compared to 18 for the Sharks. The period and made eight saves on eight shots. Blues’ forecheck was simply relentless. The Blues came alive in St. Louis and easily won Game 3. Mike The Blues are going to have to give their best effort tonight in Sillinger scored a hat trick (one a shorthanded goal) and Dallas order to tie the all-time playoff series at two each. The Sharks Drake had a goal and an assist to pace the Note. Osgood only had upset the President’s Trophy winner in seven games in 2000 to make 19 saves. In a critical Game 4, the Blues and Sharks while the Blues won the 2001 series four games to two. They traded goals with Alexander Korolyuk netting the winning goal, met yet again in 2004. San Jose was the No. 2 seed that year, his second of the game, in the third period on the power play. easily winning the Pacific Division with 104 points, led by Blues’ nemesis Scott Thornton (and Joe Thornton’s cousin) also scored two goals, while Mike Danton, and Weight (on the power play) scored for St. Louis. Back in San Jose, the Sharks were determined to end the series and did just that, outscoring the outgunned Blues 3-1. Winger Brian Savage scored for St. Louis, while , Mike Ricci and Stuart all tallied their first of the series to power the Sharks to Playoffs the next round, which they won against . However, in the Conference Finals, the Sharks fell to a powerful Calgary team, led by ex-Shark Miikka Kiprusoff. For the Blues, it would be the last playoff appearance until 2009. Blues Nation was also shocked  1969 Finals Souvenir when left winger Danton was arrested two days after Game 5 and Program charged with conspiracy to commit . In July of that year, Danton pled guilty to attempting to hire a hit man to murder  Replica Stanley Cup David Frost, his agent, and was sentenced to a term of seven and a half years in federal prison. Danton was released on parole in 2009. The Blues and Sharks have now won 11 games each in the four series they have engaged in since 2000. St. Louis has now outscored San Jose 61 to 51. It would be fitting indeed to see the Blues knock the Sharks out tonight, not only evening the count at two series each, but also taking the lead in games won. If they continue to play team defense, limiting shots against, relentlessly fore-checking the Sharks’ into the ice, the rejuvenated power play -Rick Ackerman and Andy McDonald will take care of the rest and St. Louis can celebrate the first series win since 2001. Page 9 Our Coach Is So Fat . . .

Our Coach is so fat, Fat Albert gave him the rights to “Hey, Hey, Hey!”

Pick a numbered puck and read your fortune below! Our Coach is so fat, every time he buys a new car, he also has to buy a truck with a Wide Load sign to follow him around.

Our Coach is so fat, his blood type is gravy.

The Roman Polak Joke of the Day

Roman Polak walked into the locker room one morning with both of his ears bandaged up. Seeing him, Ken Hitchcock asked, “What the hell happened to your ears?” “Well, Coach, I was ironing my shirts yesterday when the phone rang and I accidentally answered the iron.” “OK,” said Hitch, “I see. But what happened to the other one?” “Duh,” said Polak, “I had to call the doctor!” 1. It seldom pays to be rude. It never pays to be only half-rude.

2. Lucky numbers for today: 74, 57, 42. The BJ Crombeen Joke of the Day Joe Thornton walked up to in the locker room one day and asked 3. A wise man sees as much as he ought him, “Hey man, if you went camping with a guy and woke up in the morning to, not as much as he can. with a sore throat and jaw, would you tell anyone?” “Hell, no,” said Burns. 4. One of the disadvantages of $9 “And what if, upon further examina- beers is that they make you mistake tion, you realized there was some words for thoughts. strange salty substance in your mouth and crusted on your face. Would you tell someone?” “Absolutely not, man, no way,” said Burns. “So,” said Thornton, “Wanna go camping?” Page 10 Playoff Leaders

NHL Leaders Points Goals Against Average Shutouts 1. , PHI 11 1. , VAN 1.01 1. , BOS 1 2. Jordan Staal, PIT 9 2. Brian Elliott, STL 1.51 2. Martin Brodeur, NJ 1 3. , PIT 8 3. , WSH 1.60 3. , LA 1 4. Andy McDonald, STL 7 4. Tim Thomas, BOS 1.60 4. , NYR 1 5. Danny Briere, PHI 7 5. Jaroslav Halak, STL 1.72 0

Goals Save Percentage Hits 1. Jordan Staal, PIT 6 1. Cory Schneider, VAN 96.9% 1. Shane Doan, PHX 24 2. Claude Giroux, PHI 5 2. Braden Holtby, WSH 95.3% 2. Bryan Bickell, CHI 24 3. Danny Briere, PHI 4 3. Jonathan Quick, LA 95.2% 3. , PHI 21 4. Dustin Brown, LA 4 4. Brian Elliott, STL 94.4% 4. Alex Ovechkin, WSH 21 5. Andy McDonald, STL 3 5. , NSH 94.4% 5. , CHI 20

Plus/Minus Wins Faceoff Percentage 1. Francis Bouillon, NSH 6 1. Pekka Rinne, NSH 4 1. Zenon Konopka, OTT 68.6% 2. , NSH 5 2. Ilya Bryzgalov, PHI 3 2. , VAN 67.3% 3. David Legwand, NSH 5 3. Mike Smith, PHX 3 3. , FLA 63.6% 4. Gabriel Bourque, NSH 5 4. Jonathan Quick, LA 3 4. Boyd Gordon, PHX 62.8% 5. Claude Giroux, PHI 4 5. Brian Elliott, STL 2 5. Jay Beagle, WSH 62.5%

BURKHARDT LAW FIRM,

continued LLC

Caught late and driving too fast on your way to the game? (Continued from page 2) A few too many beers while celebrating? are just better committed to playing a puck-pressure style in the defensive zone. They limit chances in the middle of the ice and quickly clear rebounds and transition up the ice. It’s exactly the style the Wings played for the last decade. Detroit has never needed great goaltending because the defense limited secondary scoring chances, where most goals are scored anyway. The reason We provide traffic law and estate planning services it doesn’t work as well for other teams as it does for the Blues is because they don’t have the personnel to make it happen. You across the St. Louis area. think San Jose isn’t trying to keep the Blues to the outside and limit secondary chances? But whenever you hear it from opposing fans, and you will, just Speeding Tickets smile and remember, they’re just mad because their team lost. The DWIs game wasn’t exciting for them because their team only got 20 Wills shots on net and only scored one goal. As a Blues fan, that same Trusts game was very exciting, with 30 shots on goal, three goals scored and lots of quick transition game play. It’s a good day to be a Blues fan. Let’s hope tomorrow morning (314) 518-1581 is too. WWW.BURKHARDTLAW.COM

-Sean “Confident, not cocky” Gallagher The choice of a lawyer is an important decision and should not be based solely upon advertisements. Page 11

Team Comparisons

Blues Playoff Leaders Sharks Playoff Leaders Goals McDonald/Berglund 3 Goals Martin Havlat 2 Assists Andy McDonald 4 Assists Three tied 3 Points Andy McDonald 7 Points Thornton/Couture 4 Plus/Minus Three tied 2 Plus/Minus Brent Burns 3 PP Goals McDonald/Berglund 2 PP Goals Havlat/Burns 1 Wins Brian Elliott 2 Wins 1 GAA Brian Elliott 1.51 GAA Antti Niemi 2.54 Save PCT Brian Elliott 94.4% Save PCT Antti Niemi 91.2%

Blues All-Time Playoff Leaders Sharks All-Time Playoff Leaders Games Played Brett Hull 102 Games Played Patrick Marleau 128 Goals Brett Hull 67 Goals Patrick Marleau 52 Points Brett Hull 117 Points Patrick Marleau 88 PIM 249 PIM 97 Goalie GP Mike Liut 39 Goalie GP Evgeni Nabokov 80 Wins Liut/Millen 17 Wins Evgeni Nabokov 40 GAA Jacques Plante 1.45 GAA Evgeni Nabokov 2.29 Shutouts Jacques Plante 4 Shutouts Evgeni Nabokov 7

Blues Lookalike Sharks Lookalike

If you’re a regular visitor to our website, you’ve already seen us compare Coach Cock to WWE manager Paul Bearer. If you haven’t, shame on you for not visiting us when you should be working. Because Stats Almost Never Lie. www.stlouisgametime.com Page 12 FightFight ClubClub By Tyler Atwood twitter.com/KingDonutI “The first rule of Fight Club is...” [email protected]

Tonight’s Matchup: Remember how I said playoff hockey fights generally start from net scrums and late-game physicality? Goddamn, do I love when I’m right. You also remember how I said the Blues would win this series in five games, even before Game 2 had been played? Well shit, son. I might end up two for two by the time tonight’s over. Dominic Moore decided to piss Vladimir Sobotka off and ended up with a broken nose. Justin Braun opened the Polak Door and almost ended up dead. This series has NOT been the same since that late-game incident last Saturday, and nothing that happened in Games 3 or 4 leads me to believe that momentum is going to shift back. Goddamn do I love playoff hockey. Start this game already.

St. Louis Blues Probable Fighters San Jose Sharks Probable Fighters

B.J. Crombeen – How bad are things right now for the San Justin Braun – Hah. What the fuck is wrong with you, man? Jose Sharks? Beej scored on them Thursday. Yes, Beej was not Somehow, you thought sucker-punching Jamie Langenbrunner even supposed to play in this series because he’s washed up or right in front of Roman Polak was a good idea. If 4/20 wasn’t whatever, but he scored a fucking goal. Game over, man. Game yesterday, I’d ask what the fuck you were smoking when you over. thought that.

Barret “SIR JAXX” Jackman – His fight last Saturday was Brad “Fucking” Winchester – To channel my inner Nate arguably the worst of the four, but he played probably the most The Great . . . “brad winchester lol lol brad winchester brad prominent role in the scrum, basically goading every Sharks winchester lol. lol brad winchester brad winchester lol lol brad player into wanting to fight him before Douglas finally winchester brad winchester. lol lol.” obliged. Dear fuck do I love Jaxx. Michal Handzus – He’s not going to get into a fight in this Roman Polak – Also in the category of loving to be right . . . I game, but I raise his name because before this series began, I have been harping for at least the last two years about Polak had no fucking clue Handzus was still alive, much less in the being the kind of guy who you do not want to piss off. Now, the . These days, he’s relatively marginal. whole league knows. Keep on truckin’, Roman.

Best bet of the night: Handshakes. – Tyler Atwood

Date Combatants Battle Decision This was the last of the three Game 2 post-horn fights to end, and arguably it was either the best or worst fight, depending Barret Jackman vs. 4/14/2012 on how you look at it. Good because neither man lost, bad Draw Douglas Murray because . . . well, it was relatively boring. Nothing to write home about this fight, really. The post-horn scrum was crazy enough that at one point, Braun punched Jamie Langenbrunner in the back of the head with Polak right in front of him. This is why Coach 'Cock not- Roman Polak vs. Justin "Don't ever open that 4/14/2012 ed something about "the Polak Door" after the game. Braun Braun door": Polak opened it, then got brutalized by Polak, who barely changed facial expression while beating Braun nearly within an inch of his life. Wowzers. In looking at the video, it's relatively unclear how this fight began, but it's clear how it ended . . . with a broken nose for "I GOT YOUR SUCKER- Vladimir Sobotka vs. Moore. Sobotka, one of the strongest pound-for-pound play- 4/14/2012 PUNCH RIGHT HERE, Dominic Moore ers on this Blues roster, was not having any of Moore's shit, MCLELLAN!": Sobotka whatever that shit was, and took it out on Moore in the most brutal fashion possible for an easy victory. Franchise Foundations

St. Louis Blues San Jose Sharks Year Player Year Player 1999 Barret Jackman ~ Drafted 1st rd (17 overall) by STL 1997 Patrick Marleau ~ Drafted in 1st rd (2 overall) by SJ 2003 David Backes ~ Drafted in 2nd rd (62 overall) by STL Douglas Murray ~ Drafted in 8th rd (241 overall) by 1999 2004 Roman Polak ~ Drafted in 6th rd (180 overall) by STL SJ T.J. Oshie ~ Drafted in 1st rd (24 overall) by STL 2001 Ryane Clowe ~ Drafted in 6th rd (175 overall) by SJ 2005 Ryan Reaves ~ Drafted in 5th rd (156 overall) by STL 2003 Joe Pavelski ~ Drafted in 7th rd (205 overall) by SJ 2006 Patrik Berglund ~ Drafted in 1st rd (25 overall) by STL ~ Drafted in 3rd rd (94 overall) by SJ ~ Drafted in 1st rd (18 overall) by STL 2004 ~ Drafted in 4th rd (126 overall) by ~ Drafted in 1st rd (26 overall) by STL SJ 2007 Chris Porter ~ Signed as Free Agent (CHI) 2005 Marc-Edouard Vlasic ~ Drafted in 2nd rd (35 overall) Andy McDonald ~ Acquired from ANA for Doug Joe Thornton ~ Acquired from BOS for Marco Sturn, 2006 Weight, Michal Birner and a 7th rd pick in 2008 Brad Stuart and Wayne Primeau ~ Drafted in 1st rd (4 overall) by STL Logan Couture ~ Drafted in 1st rd (9 overall) by SJ 2007 B.J. Crombeen ~ Claimed off (DAL) Justin Braun ~ Drafted in 7th rd (201 overall) by SJ Alexander Steen ~ Acquired with ~ Drafted in 6th rd (177 overall) by 2008 from TOR for Lee 'Dutchie' Stempniak SJ ~ Drafted in 7th rd (186 overall) by SJ Carlo Colaiacovo ~ Acquired with Alexander Steen 2008 from TOR for Lee 'Dutchie' Stempniak ~ Acquired with from TB for Matt D'Agostini ~ Acquired from MTL for Aaron , , a 2009 2st rd pick and a 2010 Palushaj 4th rd pick Jaroslav Halak ~ Acquired from MTL for and 2009 Benn Ferriero ~ Signed as Free Agent (PHX) ~ Signed as Free Agent (undrafted) 2010 Ian Schultz 2010 ~ Drafted in 1st rd (14 overall) by STL Antti Niemi ~ Signed as Free Agent (CHI) Vladimir Sobotka ~ Acquired from BOS for David Brent Burns ~ Acquired with a 2nd rd pick in 2012 from Warsofsky MIN for , and a 1st rd Chris Stewart ~ Acquired with and a pick in 2011 Michal Handzus ~ Signed as Free Agent (LA) 2nd rd pick in 2011 from COL for , Jay 2011 Jim Vandermeer ~ Signed as a Free Agent (EDM) McClement and a 1st rd pick in 2011 Martin Havlat ~ Acquired from MIN for Kevin Shattenkirk ~ Acquired with Chris Stewart and a Colin White ~ Signed as Free Agent (NJ) 2nd rd pick in 2011 from COL for Erik Johnson, Jay Brad F. Winchester ~ Signed as Free Agent (ANA) McClement and a 1st rd pick in 2011 Dominic Moore ~ Acquired with a 2012 7th rd pick from Evgeny Grachev ~ Acquired from NYR for a 3rd rd pick 2011 TB for a 2012 2nd rd pick (from MIN) in 2011 ~ Acquired with T.J. Galiardi and a 2012 ~ Signed as Free Agent (WAS) 7th rd pick from COL for Jamie McGinn, Mike Connolly 2012 Jamie Langenbrunner ~ Signed as Free Agent (DAL) and Brian Elliott ~ Signed as Free Agent (COL) T.J. Galiardi ~ Acquired with Daniel Winnik and a 2012 Kent Huskins ~ Signed as Free Agent (SJ) 7th rd pick from COL for Jamie McGinn, Mike Connolly Scott Nichol ~ Signed as Free Agent (SJ) and Michael Sgarbossa ~ Acquired from CLB for Management / Coaching Management / Coaching 2003 - - Assistant Coach 2006 2008 Todd McLellan - Head Coach Ray Bennett - Assistant Coach Jay Woodcroft - Assistant Coach 2009 Scott Mellanby - Assistant Coach Matt Shaw - Assistant Coach 2010 - General Manager Corey Hirsch - Goaltending Coach 2011 Ken Hitchcock - Head Coach St. Louis Blues Rosters General Manager: Doug Armstrong Head Coach: Ken Hitchcock and Statistics Assistant Coaches: Ray Bennett / Brad Shaw Scott Mellanby Goaltending Coach: Corey Hirsch # Player Pos DOB Birth City S/P Ctry HT Wt S Rk GP G A Pts +/- PIM TOI/G Salary 4 Kris Russell D May 02 '87 Caroline AB CAN 70 172 L 4 0 1 1 1 5 18:05 $1,300,000 5 Barret Jackman D Mar 05 '81 Trail BC CAN 72 205 L 4 0 0 0 -2 17 23:05 $3,500,000 6 Kent Huskins D May 04 '79 Almonte ON CAN 76 210 L 1 0 0 0 0 2 24:29 $1,000,000 9 Jaden Schwartz L Jun 25 '92 Melfort SK CAN 69 179 L Y 0 0 0 0 0 0 0:00 $690,000 10 Andy McDonald L Aug 25 '77 Strathroy ON CAN 71 185 L 4 3 4 7 1 2 21:16 $4,200,000 12 Scott Nichol C Dec 31 '74 AB CAN 69 180 R 4 0 0 0 0 6 12:25 $600,000 15 Jamie Langenbrunner R Jul 24 '75 Cloquet MN USA 73 202 R 4 0 0 0 1 4 11:00 $2,500,000 17 Vladimir Sobotka L Jul 02 '87 Trebic CZE 70 198 L 4 1 0 1 0 15 14:22 $1,200,000 20 Alexander Steen L Mar 01 '84 MB CAN 73 206 L 4 1 2 3 1 2 22:21 $3,566,667 21 Patrik Berglund C Jun 02 '88 Vesteras SWE 76 219 L 4 3 3 6 2 2 21:47 $2,100,000 22 Kevin Shattenkirk D Jan 29 '89 Greenwich CT USA 71 208 R 4 0 1 1 -1 2 21:58 $875,000 23 Ian Cole D Feb 21 '89 Ann Arbor MI USA 73 225 L Y 0 0 0 0 0 0 0:00 $875,000 25 Chris Stewart R Oct 30 '87 ON CAN 74 232 R 3 0 0 0 -1 0 10:31 $3,250,000 26 B.J. Crombeen R Jul 10 '85 CO USA 74 210 R 3 1 0 1 1 4 9:09 $950,000 27 Alex Pietrangelo D Jan 18 '90 King City ON CAN 75 205 R 4 0 1 1 2 0 26:28 $787,500 28 Carlo Colaiacovo D Jan 27 '83 Toronto ON CAN 73 200 L 3 0 3 3 2 4 18:59 $2,500,000 32 Chris Porter L May 29 '84 Toronto ON CAN 73 210 L 0 0 0 0 0 0 0:00 $600,000 36 Matt D'Agostini R Oct 23 '86 Sault Ste. Marie ON CAN 72 198 R 1 0 0 0 0 0 9:26 $1,500,000 42 David Backes C May 01 '84 Minneapolis MN USA 75 225 R 4 1 0 1 -2 6 21:03 $4,500,000 44 Jason Arnott C Oct 11 '74 Collingwood ON CAN 77 220 R 4 1 0 1 0 0 10:37 $2,500,000 46 Roman Polak D Apr 28 '86 Ostrava CZE 73 225 R 4 0 0 0 -2 19 19:38 $2,000,000 57 David Perron L May 28 '88 Sherbrooke QC CAN 72 200 R 4 0 2 2 0 4 17:13 $2,500,000 74 T.J. Oshie R Dec 23 '86 Mt. Vernon WA USA 71 194 R 4 0 2 2 -2 0 20:00 $2,350,000 75 Ryan Reaves R Jan 20 '87 Winnipeg MB CAN 73 229 R 1 0 0 0 0 0 8:01 $525,000 11 19 30 1 94 $46,369,167 # Player DOB Birth City S/P Ctry HT Wt C Rk GP W L OT SO GAA Sv% Salary 1 Brian Elliott Apr 09 '85 Newmarket ON CAN 75 204 L 3 2 0 0 0 1.51 94.4% $600,000 34 Jake Allen Aug 07 '90 Fredericton NB CAN 74 195 L Y 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.0% $787,500 41 Jaroslav Halak May 13 '85 Bratislava SVK 71 182 L 2 1 1 0 0 1.73 93.5% $3,500,000 3 1 0 0 $4,887,500

14 $51,256,667 Legend: S:Shoots; C: Catches; Rk: Rookie (any player who has played fewer than 25 games in the previous season or fewer than 26 in the previous two years

Page and has not reached age 26); GP: Games Played; G: Goals; A: Assists; Pts: Points; PIM: Penalties in Minutes; TOI/Game: average Time On Ice per Game.

15

Page San Jose Sharks Rosters General Manager: Doug Wilson Head Coach: Todd McLellan and Statistics Assistant Coaches: Matt Shaw/Jay Woodcroft Goaltending Coach:

# Player Pos DOB Birth City S/P Ctry HT Wt S Rk GP G A Pts +/- PIM TOI/G Salary 2 Jim Vandermeer D Feb 21 '80 Caroliane AB CAN 73 210 L 0 0 0 0 0 0 0:00 $1,000,000 3 Douglas Murray D Mar 12 '80 Bromma SWE 75 240 L 4 0 0 0 -1 19 17:28 $2,500,000 5 Colin White D Dec 12 '77 New Glasgow NS CAN 76 215 L 2 1 0 1 1 0 12:56 $1,000,000 8 Joe Pavelski R Jul 11 '84 Plover WI USA 71 195 R 4 0 0 0 -2 5 20:44 $4,000,000 9 Martin Havlat R Apr 19 '81 Mlada Boleslav CZE 74 210 L 4 2 1 3 1 4 18:57 $5,000,000 10 Brad Winchester L Mar 01 '81 Madison WI USA 77 230 L 1 0 0 0 0 0 6:41 $725,000 12 Patrick Marleau L Sep 15 '79 Aneroid SK CAN 74 220 L 4 0 0 0 1 4 20:32 $6,900,000 17 Torrey Mitchell C Jan 30 '85 Greenfield Park QC CAN 71 190 L 4 0 0 0 -1 6 12:42 $1,725,000 18 Dominic Moore C Aug 03 '80 Thornhill ON CAN 72 192 L 3 0 0 0 -1 5 15:07 $1,200,000 19 Joe Thornton C Jul 02 '79 London ON CAN 76 230 L 4 1 3 4 2 2 21:24 $8,000,000 22 Dan Boyle D Jul 12 '76 Ottawa ON CAN 71 190 R 4 0 2 2 1 4 29:38 $6,666,667 26 Michal Handzus C Mar 11 '77 Banska Bystrica SVK 77 215 L 1 0 0 0 0 0 10:22 $2,500,000 29 Ryane Clowe L Sep 30 '82 Mount Pearl NF CAN 74 225 L 4 0 3 3 0 0 19:28 $3,500,000 34 Daniel Winnik L Mar 06 '85 Toronto ON CAN 74 210 L 4 0 0 0 0 6 12:17 $1,000,000 37 TJ Galiardi L Apr 22 '88 Calgary AB CAN 74 190 L 3 0 0 0 -1 6 12:37 $700,000 39 Logan Couture C Mar 28 '89 Guelph ON CAN 73 195 L 4 1 3 4 0 0 19:44 $787,500 44 Marc-Edouard Vlasic D Mar 30 '87 QC CAN 73 200 L 4 0 0 0 -2 2 21:25 $3,500,000 57 Tommy Wingels C Apr 12 '88 Evanston IL USA 72 190 R Y 4 0 1 1 1 2 11:42 $687,500 60 Jason Demers D Jun 09 '88 Dorval QC CAN 73 195 R 2 0 0 0 -1 2 18:14 $1,100,000 61 Justin Braun D Feb 10 '87 Minneapolis MN USA 74 200 R 4 0 0 0 -1 15 18:20 $712,500 69 Andrew Desjardins C Jul 27 '86 Lively ON CAN 73 200 L Y 4 1 0 1 1 2 11:46 $540,000 78 Benn Ferriero R Apr 29 '87 MA USA 71 195 R 0 0 0 0 0 0 0:00 $605,000 88 Brent Burns D Mar 09 '85 Barrie ON CAN 77 230 R 4 1 1 2 3 4 25:39 $4,000,000 2 1 3 2 23 $58,349,167 # Player DOB Birth City S/P Ctry HT Wt C Rk GP W L OT SO GAA Sv% Salary 1 Thomas Greiss Jan 29 '86 Fussen DEU 73 210 L Y 0 0 0 0 0 0 0.0% $550,000 31 Antti Niemi Aug 29 '83 Vantaa FIN 74 210 L 4 1 3 0 0 2.55 91.2% $3,200,000 1 3 0 0 $3,750,000 $62,099,167

Legend: S:Shoots; C: Catches; Rk: Rookie (any player who has played fewer than 25 games in the previous season or fewer than 26 in the previous two years and has not reached age 26); GP: Games Played; G: Goals; A: Assists; Pts: Points; PIM: Penalties in Minutes; TOI/Game: average Time On Ice per Game. Page 16 NHL Referee Statistics

2011-2012 Since 2007 1st O O No. Born Blues Blues Blues Blues Blues Blues Game W L T W L T Games PP PK Games PP PK L L 2 Hasenfratz, Mike Regina, SK 2000 4 16 16 2 2 0 10 35 36 5 4 1 3 Leggo, Mike North Bay, ON 1997 3 7 12 2 1 0 28 105 103 15 10 3 4 McCauley, Wes Georgetown, ON 2003 5 11 9 2 2 0 14 41 44 8 5 1 5 Rooney, Chris Boston, MA 2000 9 40 35 7 2 0 29 122 127 13 11 5 7 McCreary, Bill Guelph, ON 1984 16 69 68 6 8 2 8 Jackson, Dave Montreal, PQ 1990 5 14 17 3 1 1 23 87 94 14 7 2 9 O'Rourke, Dan Calgary, AB 1999 5 20 25 5 0 0 20 83 76 10 6 4 10 Devorski, Paul Guelph, ON 1989 7 20 22 6 0 1 22 81 88 11 8 3 11 Sutherland, Kelly Richmond, BC 2000 5 16 17 3 2 0 23 78 83 9 13 1 12 St. Pierre, Justin Dolbeau, PQ 2003 4 13 12 2 2 0 18 71 66 13 3 2 13 O'Halloran, Dan Essex, ON 1995 6 19 23 2 4 0 27 113 134 12 13 2 14 LaRue, Dennis Savannah, GA 1991 5 11 17 3 2 0 27 90 98 12 10 5 15 Auger, Stephane Montreal, PQ 2000 6 17 16 4 2 0 28 115 126 15 11 2 16 Pochmara, Brian Detroit, MI 2006 5 25 24 5 0 0 27 114 130 16 7 4 17 L'Ecuyer, Frederick Tois Riveres, PQ 2007 5 19 19 4 1 0 12 43 44 5 7 0 18 Kimmerly, Greg Toronto, ON 1996 3 8 8 1 2 0 26 87 97 9 12 5 19 Dwyer, Gord Halifax, NS 2003 5 16 17 3 1 1 27 105 101 13 12 2 20 Peel, Tim Toronto, ON 1999 4 6 9 3 1 0 30 98 104 15 12 3 21 VanMassenhoven, Don Parkhill, ON 1993 5 16 12 4 0 1 25 93 104 15 6 4 22 Hebert, Ghislain Dieppe, NB 2009 5 15 15 2 1 2 10 33 39 5 3 2 23 Watson, Brad Regina, Sas 1996 6 18 22 3 0 3 29 111 125 11 11 7 24 Walkom, Stephen North Bay, ON 1990 3 6 5 2 0 1 9 28 27 5 2 2 25 Joannette, Marc Verdun, PQ 1999 3 12 11 3 0 0 20 79 80 9 8 3 26 Martell, Rob Winnipeg, MB 1996 6 23 12 5 0 1 25 104 104 18 5 2 27 Furlatt, Eric Trois-Rivieres, PQ 2001 5 20 15 2 2 1 23 90 93 10 10 3 28 Lee, Chris St John, NB 2001 4 14 17 3 1 0 28 124 122 12 13 3 29 Walsh, Ian Philadelphia, PA 2000 5 9 12 1 2 2 23 75 88 10 11 2 32 Kowal, Tom Vernon, BC 2000 6 32 24 4 2 0 26 104 104 11 11 4 33 Pollock, Kevin Kincardine, ON 2000 4 13 13 0 2 2 26 88 97 10 11 5 34 Meier, Brad Dayton, OH 1999 7 22 28 3 2 2 27 99 102 12 10 5 36 Morton, Dean Peterborough, ON 2000 4 10 17 4 0 0 21 80 90 14 5 2 37 Rehman, Kyle Stettler, AB 2008 6 23 21 2 3 1 17 62 60 8 5 4 38 St Laurent, Francois Greenfield Park, PQ 2006 7 25 26 5 2 0 21 90 79 13 6 2 40 Kozari, Steve Penticton, BC 2006 4 13 21 2 1 1 24 99 109 15 8 1 41 Ciamaga, Chris Buffalo, NY 2008 3 10 15 1 2 0 43 Jean Hebert Bouctouche, NB 2010 1 4 3 0 0 1 1 4 3 0 0 1 44 Banfield, Steve Halifax, NS 2008 2 10 11 0 1 1 6 30 27 3 2 1 45 Marcus Vinnerborg , SWE 2010 2 4 5 2 0 0 4 9 14 2 2 0 46 Charron, Francis Gatineau, PQ 2010 1 6 6 1 0 0 TOTALS 86 284 294 52 22 11 1478 1554 193 145 50 NHL Linesmen

# Name # Name # Name # Name # Name 47 Schachte, Dan 65 Racicot, Pierre 74 Cameron, Lonnie 84 Sericolo, Tony 93 Murphy, Brian 50 Cherrey, Scott 66 Gibbs, Darren 75 Amell, Derek 86 Lazarowich, Brad 94 Pancich, Bryan 54 Devorski, Greg 67 Champoux, Pierre 76 Cormier, Michel 88 Cvik, Mike 95 Murray, Jonny 55 Heyer, Shane 68 Driscoll, Scott 77 Nowak, Tim 89 Miller, Steve 96 Brisebois, David 56 Wheler, Mark 70 Nansen, Derek 78 Mach, Brian 90 McElman, Andy 97 Morin, Jean 57 Sharrers, Jay 71 Kovachik, Brad 80 Nelson, Thor 91 Henderson, Don 59 Barton, Steve 73 Rody, Vaughan 82 Galloway, Ryan 92 Shewchyk, Mark 2012 Stanley Cup Playoffs: First Round, Game 5 GAME TIME Page 17 St. Louis Game Time Scorecard

St. Louis Blues vs. San Jose Sharks; Saturday, April 21, 2012

Referee: ______Referee: ______

Linesman: ______Linesman: ______

Shots Score Team 1st 2d 3rd OT SO F Team 1st 2d 3rd OT SO F

Sharks Sharks

Blues Blues

Blues Starting Lineup Goal Scoring

C: Per. Time Team Goalscorer 1st Assist 2nd Assist LW: RW: D: D: G:

Sharks Starting Lineup C: LW: RW: Penalties Called D: Per. Time Team Penalized Player Penalty D: G:

Three Stars of the Game 1st Star: 2nd Star: 3rd Star:

Other Stars of the Game GWG: GW Goalie: Hard Hat:

Game Notes: Page 18

Dear Answer Man, issue whatsoever. I think he should have the ability to marry his You have to be just licking your chops at how violent the partner too. They guy is way talented, but I just want him to playoffs have been. Guys like you probably like to call it Old come clean about how he likes being a power-bottom and then Time Hockey, right? Well it downright disgusts me that the tell us how old he was when he first decided to “keep the playoffs have deteriorated into a fight to see who’s left change.” standing. Someone is going to get hurt so bad they lose a I think it is awesome that Philly is beating them in games and career. This has got to be fixed. Will a suspension to Raffi is also just plain beating them up. It is so rewarding for me. Torres be the ultimate deterrent? Then Mario speaks up about his “displeasure.” Shut it, Mario. -Ben (St. Louis, MO) Go back to eating out dude anus. This is all coming from the guy who smoked while he played then was shocked when he got cancer. Idiot. What too soon for a Mario cancer joke? Puh-leez. Ben, if you don’t like it change the channel, So yeah, I love the violence and would like it to continue as you pussy. All of you mambie-pambie long as it is up front and manly. What big difference maker with whiners can just shut your vaginas. hockey is that it is more manly when you look a guy in the eye You act like every second of the game when you are fighting him. This differs from Gay Chicken, Dong is a stick swinging incident or brawl. Tip-to-Tip and from playing Brown Finger (killer Is every game violent? Hell yeah, it is wrestling move by the way). Enough on the violence as there’s and it should be. It’s hockey, it should no question I love it. be violent, you ass. My question to you is does your labia ache while One thing I will change course on is praising a goalie. Yep, watching all of this delicious man-on this is a first, and feel free to reread the first line of this -man violence? If it does, just paragraph. OK, you back? Good. Brian Elliott has been great. I remember to wipe front to back, you lady boy. am not surprised he has taken over. Yeah, that is easy to say, but dude is a pimp. At the start of the playoffs everyone got out their Someone asked me on Twitter the other day how bad would I Chapstick, loaded up and was ready to ball suck Halak. I’m sure beat down after the hit. It got me thinking (and he’s a good dude but he’s a Euro. I have no faith in a Euro as I’m aroused) about what I would do. I would absolutely give him a sure you all know. I will put my money down on Grade A North dance card and before his hands were all the way up, I’d belt American Beefcake. Elliott will stand tall, and has anyone else him. I’d purposely break his jaw. Eye for an eye, right? Since you noticed how the team plays more confidently when he’s in net? are a pussy, you probably are thinking that this will just Now I’m not going to run out and get an Elliott jersey or perpetuate things. It wouldn’t, it would allow Raffi to drink his anything, but I will refrain from making fun of him. I will meals for the next six to eight weeks. I’d be doing him a favor consider myself a “well wisher.” and help him lose weight and recognize what a piece of garbage he is. This column is completely scatter brained I know, but this is what is on my Answer Mind. Do I expect the Blues to win This guy has a sketchy past anyway. How can you defend tonight? Fuck yeah, I do but don’t count the Sharks out and start him? He’s a cheap player who won’t back it up and just head looking at the next round (you too, Phoenix). Like I have said hunts people. What surprised me the most is he is from Canada before, my minimum expectation for this club is to see them in and you’d think he’d play with some honor. Not so much. The the conference finals. Lucky for you that means more hockey, other thing that people forget is that he ran from a Phruit Euro. but more importantly, you will hear more about how awesome I Which is basically like beating up a chick. It’s a lose-lose am. situation and you look like ball bag. Finally, today is Gallagher’s birthday. When you see him Let’s get off Torres like I got off your mom the other night. I’d outside of section 307 in between periods tonight you have two like to draw your attention to the Pittsburgh and Philadelphia choices. You either punch him in the arm or grab him by his series. Anyone else notice how gutless Crosby is? He starts in healthy old man dong. Take your pick, but choose wisely. Dude with someone and pretends to fight and either bails out or lets a is a Marine. Happy Birthday, Gravy, you Irish prick. You are teammate finish. Dude needs to have a sack and either finish forever my Boy. Smooches, AM. what he starts or just don’t start. Then there was the situation where he swept Hartnell’s out of Hartnell’s reach. Wow, that is really sticking it to him Sidney, you weak ass puke. I will Send your questions: [email protected] say this, the guy has to be gay. I’m completely fine with that. No GAME TIME Page 19 GAME TIME Page 19

By Joe Barker

Finish. Finish. Finish. incredible. Andy McDonald … I mean holy shit. The little dude Tonight is the most important game of the season for these with the wheels is a god damn playoff beast. Want to know the St. Louis Blues. The previous most important game? Thursday. only non-Penguin or non-Flyer in the top-5 of playoff scoring? The Blues nailed that with a huge 2-1 win to take a 3-1 win It’s the Happy Meal. series lead and head back to St. Louis with a chance to close McDonald has been a good player for a while in St. Louis, but things out. The Blues have the Sharks on the brink and can’t he somehow took his game to another level. The little dude is give them new life. sneaking around and finding quiet places on the ice. The power Finish. Finish. Finish. play has been awesome and McDonald is a big reason why. McDonald has three goals and four dimes and has just gotten If you’re a Blues fan, and I assume you are since you’re better each game. He’s got a chip on his shoulder from the reading this high-quality publication, you probably think this Sharks taking a few runs at him. It’s just incredible to watch. If has been an exciting series. Some fisticuffs, some offense, the media care about this series beyond calling it boring, plenty of defense and games that have gone McDonald would be talked about as one of the down to the wire—minus Game 2 but that breakout players of these playoffs. Right now, game had that brouhaha in the final he’s probably the leading candidate for Blues minutes, so no complaints here. playoff MVP. The non-Blues fans? They have called the His other challenger for playoff MVP so far Blues boring. To that I say? I don’t fucking is the enigmatic Patrik Berglund. I don’t know care. The Penguins have played exciting what’s gotten into big Berglund, but I don’t hockey, and they are one game away from care. He’s playing like a man possessed at going home (but have been surprisingly both ends of the ice. His back checking saved frisky since going down 3-0). a great scoring chance in Game 4 and his The Blues have built a lead thanks, in determination (and six points) has powered large part, to the top two lines. One line is the Blues. As inconsistent as he has been gold for your playoff pool. The other line? throughout his Blues career, and he has been, Murder. In a good way, but a way that could he’s but just as good this series. be better. I’ll explain. Before the season, I said Berglund would be The top line of David Backes, T.J. Oshie the best player on the Blues points-wise based You know who is awesome in and David Perron has been pretty poo-y, on his stellar showing at the World playoff games? I am awesome in offensively. Backes has one goal and Oshie Championships. I was very wrong, but it looks playoff games. and Perron each have two assists. like the Worlds were a window in the soul of Combined? That’s five points, or two fewer (photo by Angela Vincent) Berglund—dude loves tournaments. He was than Andy McDonald has picked up in this huge for and is huge for the Blues. It’s series. been so bizarre watching him play so well The line is just not generating much of- after going weeks this season seemingly going fense. Backes has four shots in four games. The trio is a through the motions. combined minus-4. If I were a dumb fan, I’d be screaming Of course, you can’t talk about the Blues playoff MVPs without about how shitty these guys are and how the top line blows. mentioning the great Brian Elliott. I keep waiting for the other Fortunately, I’m not dumb. shoe to drop, Cinderella to turn back into a pumpkin and all You see, the first line could play a little bitter and produce those other clichés, but you know what, it hasn’t happened. more, as long as they don’t sacrifice defensively. The top line Brian Elliott is a legit good NHL goalie. I know some Wings fans, has been a checking line (Weird, I know. must now that they have nothing better to do (besides find a new watch this team and just cry.) and has shut down the Sharks. bandwagon to jump on since the Wings run is over), will squawk Patrick Marleau is his usual ghost self and has disappeared about how Elliott isn’t elite. He’s not Jimmy Howard. And completely. The first line has done such a good job defensively they’re right. that the Sharks, in Game 4, broke up the lines to generate more Brian Elliott is still playing in the playoffs. Hopefully after offense. They got one garbage goal. tonight, he can keep being awesome in Round 2. If you had any Sharks on your playoff fantasy team, you’re Let’s Go Blues. getting boned by the Blues top line. Sorry. On the flip side, the second line has been abs-fucking-lutely By Brian Weidler A Tale of Two ‘Tenders those games; the highlight of Allen’s stretch run was his first and Before getting into the heart of this article, congratulations are only shutout of the season, a 32-save effort on the road in a 5-0 in order for two of the Blues’ European prospects. Sebastian victory at Abbotsford on March 11. Wännström and IF Brynäs Gavle are the champions of the Allen was pulled twice in those 19 games in favor of loaner Swedish Elite League, defeating Skellefteå IK in six games to from the San Jose organization; on Mar. 7 at Carver take the crown. In the playoffs, Wännström had a 2-5-7 scoring Arena vs. Oklahoma City, Allen was yanked in favor of Stalock line (plus-7, 4 PM) in 17 games. after surrendering three goals in just under 35 minutes. Stalock In the Finnish Elite League, or SM-, prospect came in and shut the door on the Barons the rest of the way, defenseman Teemu Eronen and Jokerit Helsinki have won the allowing the Rivs to come back for a 4-3 OT win in their biggest bronze medal for third place, defeating Blues Espoo by a 4-3 comeback of the 2011-12 season. score on Apr. 18 for the honor. Eronen “Finnished” the playoffs Two weeks later, Allen would also get the hook in a game with a 1-3-4 scoring line (plus-4, 2 PM) in ten games. where the Rivs were getting trounced, this time on “It was the best of times; it was the the road against a club that worst of times...” proved to be a nemesis for Peoria in the stretch run. In the Feb. 11 issue of this very publication, our Allen gave up four goals on 34 shots in two periods, “Tomorrow’s Blues” article focused on the NHL and Stalock was unable to turn things around for the deadline and the very likely possibility (which Rivs in the third, giving up two goals himself on 12 became reality) that The World’s Biggest Goaltend- shots on the way to a 6-2 drubbing. ing Prospect (© pending), Ben Bishop, would be an From a GAA over three, and a save percentage just ex-Blue before the month was out. barely over .900, Allen’s work down the stretch The article then shifted focus to Jake “The Snake” enabled him to improve his final numbers considera- Allen, the Blues’ second pick in the second round in bly. He shaved off over four-tenths of a goal per 2008 (34th overall) and a younger goaltender with, game from his average, finishing with a 2.93 GAA, in the eyes of many observers, more long-term and increased his save percentage to a very upside than Bishop. In that article, we speculated Jake Allen is respectable 91.5 while facing over 34 shots on expected to play as about how the impending Bishop trade would affect average per 60 minutes played. many as 65 of 76 Allen, who was at the time mired in a textbook games for the Peoria Where Allen came up a little short, however, was example of the sophomore slump: Rivermen in 2012-13. in the areas of wins and losses. While his record did “One of two things will happen,” we wrote then. improve from 5-11-1 at the time of Bishop’s departure “In the best case, Allen is inspired by the opportunity much like to 13-20-2 at season’s end, he was still a game under .500 at 8- he was inspired by the opportunity to tend goal for Team 9-1 down the stretch despite the big improvement in his GAA Canada in the 2008 U-18 World Juniors, and he rises to the and save percentage. occasion with a solid gold shutdown performance as he did in For the entire season, Peoria had a goal differential of plus-10 the U-18’s. Or on the flip side, the pressure is too much for the (217 GF, 207 GA), and scored 2.86 goals per game on the kid to take, and he wilts like a dandelion in the desert and takes average, while allowing 2.72 goals against per game. In the Peoria’s playoff hopes down the drain with him.” stretch run, however, Peoria managed to score just 52 goals in What ultimately happened is an odd hybrid of the two the last 21 games of the season, providing Allen with meager possibilities we laid out in the Feb. 11 article. support of just 2.48 goals per game. As noted above, Allen allowed 2.52 goals per game down the stretch; if you do the The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly math, you’ll find that the ratio of goals for to goals against was Statistically, Allen absolutely rose to the challenge of being made not favorable to the Rivs when the games mattered most. Peoria’s starter by default after Bishop’s trade. When Bishop Contrast the 2.48 goals per game that Allen had to work with played his last game for the Rivermen on Feb. 24 (a 2-1 loss on as the starter, to the 165 goals in 55 games Peoria scored with home ice to the ), Allen had appeared in Bishop as the primary starter (38 of 55 games). 165/55 is exactly just 19 games and his numbers were nothing to write home to three goals per game. Factor in that Peoria’s leading point New Brunswick about. When he was handed the starting job for scorer, T.J. Hensick, was sitting in the press box in St. Louis for the Rivermen, Allen had a 3.36 goals-against average and a save ten of the 21 games the Rivs played after Bishop’s trade, and also percentage just above the accepted minimum standard of factor in that the Rivs’ leading goal scorer, the gritty Brett competence (90 percent) at 90.3, and had posted wins in just Sterling, was loaned to Phoenix just after the trade deadline in five of his 19 appearances. return for the loan of the inconsistent and butter-soft Patrick In the last 21 games of Peoria’s 2011-12 schedule, Allen made O’Sullivan, and it’s not hard to see why Peoria’s goal scoring 19 starts and posted a 2.52 GAA and 93.1 save percentage in (Continued on following page) GAME TIME Page 21

him no. So why Andrew Desjardins is wearing that number is beyond me, unless the Sharks just wanted to haze him all year long. Good one, Sharks. By Sean Gallagher Desjardins is a hard-working player who went undrafted and had to work his way up in the minor leagues, Andrew Desjardins playing for the Sharks’ AHL team for two years before they offered him a contract that would Shoots: Left allow him to make it to the NHL. He played four Height: 6’1 full years in Canadian major junior then a year in Weight: 200 the CHL before getting a shot with an ECHL team and earning a call up to the AHL Worcester Birthdate: Jul. 27, 1986 Sharks. Birthplace: Lively, ON, CAN In 212 AHL games, Desjardins tallied only 39 goals and totaled a respectable 97 points, but the Sharks didn’t eventually sign him with the hopes In men’s rec. league hockey, if a guy on the other that he’d be an NHL scorer. Desjardins is in the team comes on the ice wearing No. 69, you know immediately top pro league to hit and mix it up. That’s his role—the Blues who you’re going to start chirping first. If a guy on your team have done a good job of ignoring it this series. decides he wants to wear that number on his jersey, you tell

(Continued from page 20) Like Allen, Karpowich was drafted by the Blues in 2008, but at the other end of the selection process. Where Allen was a high took an early vacation at the same time that Allen was being second-round pick at 34th overall, Karpowich was the Blues’ asked to shoulder the defensive load as the primary starter. seventh round selection at 185th overall. A 6’ 2, 195-pound On The Horizon netminder, Karpowich has spent the last four seasons as a key member of the Clarkson University (Potsdam, NY) Golden Dave Eminian, the Rivs’ beat writer for the Peoria “Journal Knights of the ECAC, where his career totals show pretty steady Star,” Tweeted late Thursday night that Allen would “play 55 of improvement from one year to the next, except for the 76 (games), maybe more” in 2012-13. In a story posted on the stereotypical “sophomore slump.” PJStar website on Friday, Eminian reiterated that “Allen is projected to play 60-65 games on Peoria’s 76-game AHL As a freshman, Karpowich quickly established himself as the schedule next season.” That would be almost double the Golden Knights’ starter, and over his four years at Clarkson, his amount of games that Allen appeared in this year (38) as a games played minutes played increased each year. The 7556 second-year pro, but Allen has played big minutes before. minutes he played in his four seasons at Clarkson represents 83.22% of the entire game time played by the Knights from In 2010-11, as a rookie pro, Allen appeared in 47 of Peoria’s 2008-09 through this season, and of the 130 games he appeared 82 games (2805 minutes), getting more minutes and games in, he started 127 of them. played than battery mate Ben Bishop that season, and that amount of playing time came on the heels of playing 45 games No matter what happens tonight against the Sharks, there will (2512 minutes) and 53 games (3023 minutes) in his last two be at least one more edition of “Game Time” this year, meaning years of major junior. In fact, this season--a year in which Allen at least one more “Tomorrow’s Blues.” In that edition, we’ll do a became a started by default--saw Allen ring up his lowest more in-depth recap of Peoria’s 2011-12 season, as well as a amount of minutes played (2148 and change) since his draft quick look at what the major junior prospects are doing in their season of 2007-08 with the St. John’s Fog Devils, where Allen playoffs. saw 1507 minutes of playing time in 30 games. Check in at the “Game Time” website this weekend and every At this point, it looks like the games that Allen does not play weekend for “Prospect Sunday,” bringing you the latest on the will be handled by , native Paul Blues’ prospects in Peoria and elsewhere with a new look and a Karpowich, who signed a two-year, two-way entry-level deal new attitude. So, until next time, remember... “if we do not with the Blues on Friday and who will be joining the Blues as prepare for ourselves the role of the hammer, there will be one of the “Black Aces,” serving as the practice goalie and nothing left but that of the anvil.” Auf wiedersehen. getting a taste of the NHL lifestyle while also getting to know the organization and next year’s battery mate Allen. Page 22

By Chris Gift

Triskaidekaphobia anyone? Yep, that 17-letter word is the fear of Guerin’s signing signified the end of the “we’re going to be awful” the No. 13. While most hockey players have superstitions and era. quirks, not many of them are game enough to put a baker’s But like his 13-wearing predecessors, he lasted less than a dozen on their backs. season with the Blues. He was sent to San Jose for Ville The Blues made it from 1967 to 1995 without any player Nieminen, Jay Barribal and a pick that ended up being David wearing 13, and looking at each player’s career with the 13 on Perron, after 61 games, 28 goals and 19 assists. Don’t feel bad for their backs for the Blues, maybe keeping 13 out of Guerin though. He left San Jose after the 2007 circulation isn’t such a bad idea. playoffs. He signed with the , Yuri Khymlev was the first to wear 13 for the played there for a year and a half, then went to team. He lasted all of nine regular season games Pittsburgh where he played on a line with Sidney for the Blues, and six more in the playoffs. His Crosby and wound up winning the Stanley Cup in goal, assist and point that he recorded in the 2009. regular season was matched by a goal, assist and point The most recent wearer of 13 was Dan Hinote. in the playoffs. Thirteen may be odd, but for Khymlev, Hinote is so hung up with 13 that when he was at least it was symmetrical. signed by the Blues and Guerin was wearing 13, Ray “Chicken Parm” Ferraro played the final 15 Hinote wore 58 (5+8=13). Hinote did a hell of a games of his career wearing 13 for the Blues in 2002. job in the community here, and was a grinder, a His stats were slightly better than Khmylev’s, but six hitter and a good penalty killer, but wasn’t skilled goals and four assists didn’t exactly crack the league enough offensively to stick around once his leaders. contract expired after the 2009 season. He signed with San Jose in the following offseason on a Neither Khymlev nor Ferraro ever played in the NHL tryout basis, didn’t make the team, played the after wearing the Blues’ 13. Spooky, dontcha’ think? 2009-2010 season in Sweden, and just finished his The next superstar to wear 13 here was yet another second year as an assistant coach in Columbus. trade deadline pickup (like Khmylev and Ferraro), Hinote was the only Blue to wear 13 in multiple although was probably more noted for his brother seasons, and the only Blue to start and finish a season wearing Pavel, and his wife Candace “D.J. Tanner” Cameron. In March of 13. He leads all five 13 wearers in games played (142) wearing the 2003, the Blues swapped for a boy named Valeri, number, but his 11 goals and 14 assists don’t compare to Guerin’s and he lasted all of five regular season games, and six playoff totals. games with the Blues. Symmetrical like Khmylev, Bure had two assists in the regular season, and two more in the playoffs. Among other players who are wearing 13 in the NHL this year were Detroit’s , Calgary’s Ollie Jokinen, Bure played one more season in the league, for and Winnipeg’s , Phoenix’s Ray Whitney and Dallas, and now makes money off of Full House reruns, have Chicago’s Dan Carcillo. Outside the NHL, you’ve probably seen mercy. 13 on Kurt Warner, Wilt Chamberlain, Brendan Ryan and Steve Thirteen (the Game Time staff has officially lost it. We’re Nash. Matt Carpenter is wearing it for the Cardinals this year. referring to a number as if it is a real person) finally had a decent is probably the most famous 13er in the history player wearing it when signed with the Blues on July of the NHL, well, other than Valeri Bure, of course. 3, 2006. Guerin had put up some pretty good stats in his previous stops. He’d won a Stanley Cup at age 24, and had The Blues went 28 years without anyone wearing 13, and now scored 20 goals in a season seven times, 30 goals four times and that it is vacant, if the tenures of the five players that wore 13 topped 40 twice. Because of a trade from Edmonton to Boston, while playing here are any indication, 28 years without another Guerin managed to play in a record-setting 85 games in the 13 may be just fine. 2000-2001 season. Thirteen wins away…it doesn’t seem all that many, does it? The Blues hadn’t started doing whatever it takes just yet, but

We will not move our giant cotton candy. St. Louis Game Time GAME TIME Page 23 St.St. LouisLouis GameGame TimeTime Top 11 Things I’d Rather Do Than Open The

Roman Polak Door

11. Participate in the power play dance. 10. Take an Al MacInnis slapshot off my five hole. Any hole, really. 9. Ride shotgun with . 8. Stand on a ledge, waving my dirty laundry while enticing people to count. 7. Pound a bunch of O’Douls with my boys. 6. Move the family to East St. Louis. 5. Challenge Bob Plager to a fight. Or a drinking contest. 4. Appear on Mike Danton's (s)hit list. 3. Deliver pizzas in north St. Louis. 2. Be involved in a love triangle with Pierre McGuire II needneed anotheranother nap.nap. and Sydney Crosby. 1. Live in Detroit.

From that crazy Art Lippo

Come East: Todd Elik probably doesn’t have a brother named Kip or an Uncle Rico. Go West: Kevin Miller At one time the Blues had and he was Date: March 23, 1995 wonderful, but he asked for a trade. He was traded for , and he too, was General Managers: San Jose’s Chuck wonderful, but he didn’t get along with Mike Grillo, and the Blues’ Keenan. Janney ended up in Vancouver. In the The skinny: This is one of those trades never ending search for a playmaking center the that is in both teams’ media guides, and team acquired Elik. both players probably remember the Counting the playoffs, Elik played 20 games trade, but other than that it wasn’t really much for the Blues and scored six times and had of a swap. seven assists. He left in the offseason for The Miller family has had quite a Boston. After 90 games in two seasons with the history in the NHL. Kevin played 620 Bs, he headed to Europe to play. games over the course of 13 seasons in the Born in 1965, Elik played as recently as 2009 NHL, including playing for both teams in -2010 in the Swiss National B League for HC New York, Detroit twice, Washington, Chicago, Thurgau. Kevin Miller’s last year in pro hockey Pittsburgh, Ottawa, San Jose and St. Louis. His was in 2004-2005 playing seven games for the brothers Kip (450 games) and Kelly UHL’s Flint Generals. (1,057 games) were also NHL players. Their cousin Drew is on his third NHL team with As Blues, Miller played 136 more games than Detroit, and Drew’s brother Ryan is well…that Ryan Elik. Then again, Elik only played 13 as a Blue. Miller scored 49 Miller. goals with 52 assists. Elik scored twice, had four assists and took two minor penalties. Not much is written about Todd Elik’s family. He Page 24

Team GP W L OT G/G GA/G 5-5 F/A PP% PK% S/G SA/G Sc 1% Tr 1st% Ld 1% Ld 2% OS% OSB% FO% 1 NASHVILLE 5 4 1 0 2.60 1.80 2.75 9.10 82.60 23.2 32.0 100.0% 0.0% 100.0% 100.0% 50.0% 100.0% 50.2 2 ST LOUIS 4 3 1 1 2.75 1.75 1.25 37.50 86.70 31.2 29.2 100.0% 0.0% 100.0% 100.0% 50.0% 100.0% 51.6 3 LOS ANGELES 4 3 1 0 2.50 1.75 0.80 13.00 88.20 32.2 36.2 66.7% 100.0% 50.0% 100.0% 50.0% 100.0% 46.4 4 PHOENIX 4 3 1 1 3.00 2.50 1.00 18.20 92.30 30.0 41.0 100.0% 66.7% 0.0% 50.0% 0.0% 75.0% 52.7 5 PHILADELPHIA 5 3 2 0 5.00 5.00 0.60 55.00 66.70 28.4 30.0 0.0% 100.0% 50.0% 100.0% 50.0% 66.7% 46.8 6 WASHINGTON 4 2 2 1 1.75 1.75 0.80 16.70 100.00 27.2 37.0 66.7% 0.0% 0.0% 100.0% 0.0% 66.7% 52 7 FLORIDA 4 2 2 0 2.50 3.00 0.38 37.50 73.30 25.5 28.8 100.0% 33.3% 100.0% 100.0% 100.0% 33.3% 52.5 8 OTTAWA 4 2 2 0 2.00 2.25 1.00 13.30 83.30 33.5 29.0 0.0% 50.0% 0.0% 0.0% 33.3% 100.0% 54.5 9 BOSTON 4 2 2 1 1.75 1.75 1.25 0.00 83.30 37.0 27.2 100.0% 33.3% 0.0% 0.0% 33.3% 100.0% 48 10 NY RANGERS 4 2 2 2 2.25 2.00 1.00 16.70 86.70 29.0 33.5 50.0% 0.0% 33.3% 100.0% 0.0% 66.7% 45.5 11 NEW JERSEY 4 2 2 0 3.00 2.50 2.67 26.70 62.50 28.8 25.5 66.7% 0.0% 50.0% 100.0% 66.7% 0.0% 47.5 12 PITTSBURGH 5 2 3 1 5.00 5.00 1.67 33.30 45.00 30.0 28.4 0.0% 100.0% 33.3% 66.7% 33.3% 50.0% 53.2 13 VANCOUVER 4 1 3 0 1.75 2.50 1.25 11.80 87.00 36.2 32.2 0.0% 33.3% 0.0% 100.0% 0.0% 50.0% 53.6 14 CHICAGO 4 1 3 3 2.50 3.00 1.00 7.70 81.80 41.0 30.0 33.3% 0.0% 0.0% 0.0% 25.0% 0.0% 47.3 15 SAN JOSE 4 1 3 0 1.75 2.75 0.80 13.30 62.50 29.2 31.2 100.0% 0.0% 0.0% 100.0% 0.0% 50.0% 48.4 16 DETROIT 5 1 4 0 1.80 2.60 0.36 17.40 90.90 32.0 23.2 100.0% 0.0% 100.0% 100.0% 0.0% 50.0% 49.8

Legend: GP: Games Played; W: Wins; L: Losses; O: Overtime Loss; G/G: total goals scored per game; GA/G: goals against per game; PP%: Power Play Percentage; PK%: Penalty Kill Percentage; S/G: shots for per game; SA/G: shots against per game; Sc 1st%: Winning percentage when scoring first; Tr 1st%: Winning percentage when trailing first; Ld 1%: Winning percentage when leading after first period; OS%: Winning percentage when outshooting opp; OSB%: Winning percentage when outshot; FO%: Team faceoff percentage GAME TIME Page 25

By the South City Hooligan

Over the past few weeks, more and more “Blues fans” have The Office Hockey Fan: Every morning, this guy comes into come out of the woodwork. They’ve dusted off their sweet Blues your office to talk hockey with you. You really don’t have swag from 2009 and reaffirmed their love for the St. Louis anything in common with this guy, but he’s a friendly guy Blues. trying to make conversation. He says things like, “I saw the Blues won 4 scores to 3.” Or he pronounces Alex Pietrangelo As a lifelong fan, you can tell these fans just don’t fit. Hell, in “Peter-ang-elo.” His fund of hockey knowledge is cut and paste 2006, you could pretty much recognize every regular fan at the directly from that morning’s Post-Dispatch. You don’t mind Blues game. After all, there were only about 13 of us that year. him. At least he talks about hockey. I’ve compiled a list of the different types of casual fans at games. If you ask these guys who Bob Plager is, you’ll likely get The Prude: This is the 50 year old lady who has never blank stares. watched hockey, but was forced to come to the game because her husband bought tickets. She complains about the The Halak Hater: This guy irrationally hates Jaroslav Halak “barbaric” fights, and gives dirty looks to based on the first seven games of this the beer swilling hooligans who scream season...despite Halak co-authoring a obscenities the entire game. She’s Jennings trophy and finishing among the probably going to make her husband go top six goaltenders in goals-against to some insufferable show at the Muny as average and save percentage. He clearly retribution. doesn't remember the dogshit days of if he thinks this is bad Guy who yells “Shoot!”: Oh, man, goaltending. You might have noticed this there is a special circle of hell reserved guy during Game 2. He was the fucking for this guy. This guy yells “Shoot!” the douchebag in the bar chanting “Ell-i- entire power play, whether the Blues are ott!!” when Halak was hurt in the second three inches from the goal line or behind period. You know, because bringing in a their own goal. He sits in the 300s, just cold goaltender in a one-goal playoff waiting for someone to notice his “Bro! My jersey is sick. Look, it’s black. game is AWESOME! brilliant insight into the game and offer And it’s got neon stripes. It’s so hot, it’s him a head coaching gig. (Side note: This Broshies: These guys are the bros who actual FIRE!” is actually how Columbus has hired head just love T.J. Oshie. Don’t get me wrong; coaches since Hitch left.) Oshie is a good player. But these guys act like he’s Sidney Crosby, Wayne Gretzky and Jesus Christ rolled into one. They Late arrivers/early exits: No, this header isn’t referring to are likely wearing a green Oshie jersey, and talk about those the typical San Jose Shark season. These fans arrive late to the reverse hits on ALL THE TIME. Oshie will pull the game and leave early because traffic is just soooooo horrible. same toe drag move 37 times in one game, but the one time it My lord, we wouldn’t want to wait an extra 20 fucking minutes actually works, Broshies gush over him like they’re Darren in the parking lot! Especially when these animals are all going Pang in love with Vladimir Sobotka. to be honking their horns when the Blues win! Listening to the end of the game on the radio is just as fun! You get a pass in Mrs. Oshie: These ladies are between the ages of 14 and 30, this category if you have a kid. Just a heads up: if you make and they carry giant “Marry Me TJ” signs. They don’t your kid leave early because he has to wake up early for school understand that a 25 year old millionaire hockey player the next day, he might end up a bitter man writing obscenity probably isn’t ready to settle down anytime soon. No, they are laced articles for an underground Blues paper. Consider too smitten by his rosy red cheeks and adorable frosted tips. yourselves warned. When not carrying their sign, they are likely wearing the ladies cut pink or grey Blues jersey...with their future husband’s name stitched on the back. SoCityHooligan writes for www.stlouisgametime.com and can The Eternal Optimist: You can tell this guy hasn’t been a be found on twitter at the same name. Blues fan for long because his optimism hasn’t been hopelessly crushed by years of early playoff exits, shitty ownership groups and/or front office mismanagement. His rose-tinted glasses are maddening, especially when you’re raging over blown third- period leads.

Page 26

(Continued from page 1) thought in Game 1 and Game 2 that the The Blues win tonight and the next Sharks did a tremendous job of putting stage of the New World Order for the the play where he scored, David pressure on the point men. The guys at NHL begins. First we saw the Predators Perron had the puck on the left the blueline had little time or space. defeat the Red Wings. We could see the wing. He fed it down to a streaking There were teal jerseys in their face Canucks go home thanks to the Kings. Patrik Berglund who cut behind the harassing them. So watch tonight. The The Blackhawks are in some serious net. That gave him time and space Blues adapted, they overcame. The key trouble with a team that should have as no San Jose defender stayed to the power play has shifted to the moved out of Phoenix a few years ago. with him. That let him keep his wings. The Blues are cycling the puck When Gary Bettman has nightmares, head up and he saw Crombeen cutting like motherfucking Sedins out there. he sees a second round of Kings-Blues, to the net. The Beej actually raised When the Blues get a lead tonight Predators-Coyotes. That would make his stick to call for the biscuit. (hey, I’m being optimistic and just four teams out of four founded since Ballsy move. You demand the following form for almost the entire the late 1960s, four teams out of four puck, you better put a good move on series), they better not fall back into a that haven’t won the Stanley Cup and it. Berglund put the puck right on shell like they have the last two games. four teams out of four that had about Crombeen’s stick between the Who am I kidding? They get a lead, zero national exposure during the circles and he snuck it inside the they’re dropping four or all five skaters regular season. If you thought ESPN right post. The hole he hit wasn’t back into their end and conceding the ignored the NHL before, just much bigger than the puck, but it neutral zone. It was our biggest wait. was enough. And the Blues had a lead complaint with Andy Murray (other But that’s putting the cart that they wouldn’t give up the rest of than his personality, the way he before the playoff horse. The the game. handled the team, the power play and Blues have business to take care I absolutely love Jason Arnott’s the lack of joy he and the players had, of tonight. Brian Elliott has never instincts on the power play. I just but that’s about it). Any lead was good won a playoff series. David Backes, wish he could convert a couple enough to protect and stop counter T.J. Oshie, Berglund, Alex more chances. He’s getting attacking. Thankfully when the Sharks Pietrangelo – none of them have open. He’s getting the puck. But were buzzing on Thursday with about seen the second round of the converting those chances into goals 10 minutes left, Patrick Marleau playoffs. None of those guys has isn’t as easy or happening as much as it decided to be a fucking moron. had as much facial hair as they did earlier in his career. There On a power play down just 1-0, have right now. It’s all new was one power play early in the Marleau made the play that sealed the territory. And if the other series series where he fanned on two Sharks’ fate in Game 4 and possibly for stay to form, the Blues would shots in the same shift. In game the series. Thornton had the puck in the have home ice advantage four, he had the best chance on an corner. One Blues defenseman stepped guaranteed the next two rounds. absolutely dangerous power play in to take it away. Kris Russell was You know, assuming some things where he hit the post, came off coming over to support toward the back continue to fall into place. the ice, stared at the blade of his of the Blues goal. Marleau was behind The fans in this building have been stick and then hit it with his hand. Russell. The puck never actually made fucking tremendous. I think the best Look, I know he has a goal in the series. it to No. 4 because Marleau cross- sign that a crowd is truly involved with He should have more with the checked him in the back and very the game is the reactions on the penalty opportunities he’s been given. nearly into the boards in a violent kill. Every little chip out of the zone is Is it a dick move to criticize manner. If Russell had started a foot or applauded like a guy is crossing the a guy on the power play when two closer to the wall, it could have tightrope without a net. Every chance in his team has converted 37 been a five-minute major for boarding. front of the net is a bobble by the guy percent of its chances with the called it a selfish penalty. on the wire. It’s amazing. And I don’t man advantage? To say the Blues And if anyone knows selfish penalties, care what the free handout is, what the should have more power play goals is it’s that guy who almost got criminal scoreboard says about when to get loud just fucking greedy. In all honesty, charges filed in a minor league incident for the fake noise meters (you know the power play is what has given when he kinda sorta tried to kill a guy. those are fake, right?) or when the the Blues a 3-1 lead in the series. Allegedly. The Blues had a bad habit of dudes with the plastic horns toot. If In talking with the press after taking penalties this season. And the your voice isn’t hoarse by the end of a Thursday’s game, Ken Hitchcock said Sharks really tried to goad the Blues period or two, I’m going to accuse you scoring a few more goals on the into doing it this series. Instead it’s of living in Detroit. power play is all that has separated been the Sharks taking the dumb trips This is our team and our town. Let the Blues from the Sharks. I totally to the box and giving the Blues more the rest of the NHL hear us tonight. agree. chances to kill them on the power play. One of these teams is going to win While the Blues’ power play has No wonder they took his captaincy away. this hockey game tonight. Why not the been tremendous this series, I St. Louis Blues. GAME TIME Page 27 Game Time Bingo! Get five in a row in any direction and you win!

Fight! Reaves proves he’s Delay of Game for A goal is scored in the Another $200 stick better than Cam puck over the first minute of any breaks at the worst Fight! Janssen. boards penalty period. possible time. Fight! (Sorry, Cam.) helps. Barret Jackman Someone near you You tipped your GT gives someone the Cowboy in the says some crazy, vendor today. PTMFUS! “You’re an idiot” Drinkin’ Playoffs. jinxy shit. smirk.

Someone asks Tom Calhoun, Did Jason just Wait for a Oshie falls JUUUUUMP! “How much time is score, Arnott? whistle, Dummy. down. left?” Horn. A goal is scored in These referees, Who’s a girl gotta the last minute of they’re not my kind blow to get an A Deuces! Guy. any period. of referees. on her skirt? Sucks.

The Cap’n Power Play Dance, Stupid Delay of Hand Job Cam! Game for puck over Frenchie! makes it yes. (A.K.A. Fist Pump Cam) the boards penalty happ’n. Power Play goal, no is stupid.

by Childhood Trauma + + WINCHESTER

Instructions: / X X 1. Place the numbers 1 through 9 in the - + MACINNIS puzzle grid. Each number is used exactly once. + + - 2. Every row and every column is a math equation - remember multiplication and X + HALAK division are performed before subtraction and addition. 3. The line totals will equal the uniform number of the player listed at the end of SUTTER Shanahan COLE the equations. Good luck!

Open Seven Days a Week Local and Long Distance Residential, Business, Storage Units, Packing, Cleaning, Moving Labor only, or with a truck multiple flights of stairs, oversized, bulky, heavy items Same low price—No hidden fees 314-469-8722 Creve Coeur * * * WE SELL BOXES * * * 314-732-5319 314-843-0354 beyondjustmovers.com South County

Cardinals Fans! $3.00 HOT DOG

OUTSIDE GATE#3 ACROSS FROM THE STAN MUSIAL STATUE