“We Are Never Defeated Unless We Give up on God.”

free Military Volume 38 • #3 • February 1, 2014 Serving Active and Retired Military, DoD Workers and Civilians for Over 35 Years visit militarypress.com

“We are never RIP IT defeated DOWN unless we – 9th Circuit Court of Appeals give up on God.” – Ronald Reagan

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2 February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS www.MilitaryPress.com • [email protected] Rip it down...

REALLY?!?A cross atop Mount Soledad in California is an unconstitutional religious display on government land and must come down, a federal judge in San Diego ruled. U.S. District Judge Larry Burns ordered the cross, which honors veterans, must be removed within 90 days. A bill directing the Pentagon to transfer the Mount Soledad Veterans Memorial and its controversial cross out of the hands of the federal government was introduced in the House of Representatives by Rep. Duncan Hunter. Many other war memorials incorporate religious symbols, he said, and Mount Soledad should not have to remove the cross that the U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals has ruled is an unconstitutional endorsement of the Christian religion on federal property. Continued on Page 4

The Military Press Remember February 1, 2014

Publisher When... Richard T. Matz 1986 What was life like back in 1986... world events, Customer Service Manager Carol Williams technology, movies... Advertising Manager pages 20-21 30 Minutes Valerie Swaine Account Representatives: to More Michelle Hull Victoria Wills L-O-V-E Public Relations Just in time for Lisa Matz Valentine’s Day see page 9 Production / Web Sandra Powers • Joe Yang Distribution • Letter to the Editor, Dennis Winks page 8 Nicole Matz, Mandie Matz Victoria Wills Take that, • Steel Magnolias, New Take on page 8 Contributing Writers France! Doug Aguillard an Old Parable • Military News, Crystal Arriaga page 10 Mort Fretel • Art Garcia Politicizing Parables • The Dirtiest Man in Howard Hian • Keith Angelin the World, page 13 Jeri Jacquin, The Movie Maven Jessamyn Patterson • Chargers Report, devilishy page 16 Contact Us: quick wit • Jokes/Crossword 9715 Carroll Centre Road on page 9 Puzzle, page 22 Suite #104 see page 6 San Diego, CA 92126 The Military Press Newsmagazine is published semi-monthly on the 1st and the 15th by Military Press Newspaper, a commercial, free-enterprise newspaper. It does not Tel 858.537.2280 necessarily reflect the opinion of the Department of the Navy and is no way associated with the Department of the Navy. The editorial objective of the Military Press is to www.militarypress.com promote support for a strong military presence. The opinions and views of the writers whose materials appear herein are those of the writers and not the publisher. Ap- pearance of advertising does not constitute endorsement by the Military Press Newspaper. Consumers should make informed decisions when purchasing products and [email protected] services, and when considering business opportunities, and research before investing. Subscription by mail is $50 per year to CONUS or FPO addresses.

For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • [email protected] February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS 3 Malibu. If people want a creche, fine. us alone?” The menorah a few hundred yards In light of recent events (terrorist away is fine, too. I do not like getting attacks, school shootings, etc.) I think pushed around for being a Jew, and it started when Madeleine Murray I don’t think Christians like getting O’Hare (she was murdered, her body pushed around for being Christians. found recently) complained she didn’t I think people who believe in God want prayer in body our schools, and are sick and tired of getting pushed we said OK. Then someone said you around, period. I have no idea where better not read the Bible in school; the concept came from that America the Bible says thou shalt not kill, thou is an explicitly atheist country. I can’t shalt not steal, and love your neigh- find it in the Constitution and I don’t bor as yourself; and we said OK. Then like it being shoved down my throat. Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn’t Or maybe I can put it another way. spank our children when they misbe- Where did the idea come from that we have because their little personalities should worship presidents, politicians, would be warped and we might damage money and greed and aren’t allowed to their self-esteem (Dr. Spock’s grandson worship God as we understand him? I committed suicide). We said an expert guess that’s a sign that I’m getting old, should know what he’s talking about. too. But there are a lot of us who are And we said OK. wondering where the America we used Now we’re asking ourselves why our to know went to. children have no conscience, why they don’t know right from wrong, and why Ben Stein, lawyer, publicist, columnist, CBS TV commentator it doesn’t bother them to kill strangers, Anne Graham Lutz: their classmates, and themselves. Prob- RIP IT DOWN not bother me even a little bit when While interviewed on the Early ably, if we think about it long and hard Cont’d. from Page 3 people call those beautifully lit-up, Show, Jane Clayson asked Anne, “How enough, we can figure it out. I think it bejeweled trees Christmas trees. I could God let something like this hap- has a great deal to do with “WE REAP Dismissing the Mt.Soledad Cross don’t feel threatened. I don’t feel dis- pen?” (regarding Hurricane Katrina) WHAT WE SOW.” or any other symbol of faith or a be- criminated against. That’s what they Anne Graham gave an extremely pro- Funny how simple it is for people lief in God is unjust. This reminds me are — Christmas trees. It doesn’t both- found and insightful response. She to trash God and then wonder why the (Richard Matz, publisher of The Mili- er me a bit when people say ‘Merry said, “I believe God is deeply sad- world’s going to hell. Funny how we tary Press) of these two stories by Ben Christmas’ to me. I don’t think they’re dened by this, just as we are, but for believe what the newspapers say, but Stein (lawyer, publicist, columnist, CBS slighting me or getting ready to put years we’ve been telling God to get out question what the Bible says. Funny TV commentator) and Billy Graham’s me in a ghetto. In fact, I kind of like of our schools, to get out of our govern- how you can send ‘jokes’ through e- daughter, Anne Graham Lutz. it. I shows that we’re all brothers and ment and to get out of our lives. And mail and they spread like wildfire but sisters celebrating this happy time of being the gentleman He is, I believe when you start sending messages re- Ben Stein year. It doesn’t bother me one bit that He has calmly backed out. How can we garding the Lord, people think twice I am a Jew and every single one of there’s a manger scene on display at a expect God to give us His blessing and about sharing. Funny how lewd, crude, my ancestors was Jewish, and it does key intersection at my beach house in His protection if we demand He leave vulgar and obscene articles pass freely

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Anne Graham Lutz, Evangelists Billy Graham’s daughter. through cyberspace, but public discus- sharing it. Funny how we can be more sion of God is through suppressed in worried about what other people think the school and workplace. of us than what God thinks of us. Pass Are you laughing yet? Funny how it on if you think it has merit. If not when you read this message, you will then just discard it, no one will know not share it to many of your friends you did. But, if you discard this thought because you’re not sure what they be- process, don’t sit back and complain lieve, or what they will think of you for about what bad shape the world is in.

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For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • [email protected] February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS 5 THE NEW PARABLE OF ...... the ant & the grasshopper Here are two versions of the same parable with different morals.

Old version he is cold and starving. CBS, NBC, PBS, The ant works hard in the wither- CNN, and ABC show up to provide pic- ing heat all summer long, building tures of the shivering grasshopper next his house and laying up supplies for to a video of the ant in his comfortable the winter. The grasshopper thinks home with a the ant is a fool and laughs and dances table filled with food. and plays the summer away. Come win- blames President Bush ed by the Government Green Czar and ter, the ant is warm and well fed. The America 43, President Bush 41, given to the grasshopper. grasshopper has no food or shelter, so is stunned President Reagan, Chris- The story ends as we see the grass- he dies out in the cold. by the sharp topher Columbus, and the hopper and his free-loading friends contrast. How Pope for the grasshopper’s finishing up the last bits of the ant’s MORAL OF THE STORY: can this be, plight. Nancy Pelosi and food while the government house he Be responsible for yourself! that in a coun- Harry Reid exclaim in an is in, which, as you recall, just hap- try of such interview on The View that pens to be the ant’s old house, crum- Modern version wealth, this the ant has gotten rich off bles around them because the grass- The ant works hard in the with- poor grass- the back of the grasshopper, and both hopper doesn’t maintain it. The ant has ering heat and the rain all summer hopper is allowed to suffer so? call for an immediate tax hike on the disappeared in the snow, never to be long, building his house and laying up Kermit the Frog appears on ant to make him pay his fair share. Fi- seen again. The entire nation collaps- supplies for the winter. The grasshop- Oprah with the grasshopper and ev- nally, the EEOC drafts the Economic es bringing the rest of the free world per thinks the ant is a fool and laughs erybody cries when they sing, ‘It’s Not Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act ret- with it. and dances and plays the summer Easy Being Green ...’ Occupy the Ant- roactive to the beginning of the sum- away. Come winter, the shivering grass- hill stages a demonstration in front mer. The ant is fined for failing to MORAL OF THE STORY: hopper calls a press conference and de- of the ant’s house where the news hire a proportionate number of green Be careful how you vote mands to know why the ant should be stations film the group. President bugs and, having nothing left to pay his in 2014 and 2016. allowed to be warm and well fed while Barack Obama condemns the ant and retroactive taxes, his home is confiscat-

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6 February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS www.MilitaryPress.com • [email protected] You could have heard a Over 30 Years experience PIN DROP At a time when our president and facilities; they have three cafeterias with other politicians tend to apologize the capacity to feed 3,000 for our country’s prior actions, people three meals a day, here’s a refresher on how they can produce several thousand gallons of fresh wa- some of our former patriots ter from sea water each day, and handled negative comments they carry half a dozen helicopters about our country. for use in transporting victims and injured to and from their flight deck. • JFK’S Secretary of State, We have eleven such ships; How many Dean Rusk, was in France does France have?” in the early ’60s when De- You could have heard a pin drop Gaulle decided to pull out of NATO. DeGaulle said • A U.S. Navy Admiral was attend- he wanted all U.S. mili- ing a naval conference that included tary out of France as soon as admirals from the U.S., English, Cana- possible. Rusk re- sponded, dian, Australian and French navies at “Does that include those a cocktail reception, he found himself who are buried here?” De- standing with a large group of officers Gaulle did not respond. that included personnel from most of You could have heard a pin drop those countries. Everyone was chat- ting away in English as they sipped • When their drinks in England at but a French a fairly large admiral sud- conference, denly com- Colin Pow- plained that, ell was asked whereas Eu- by the Arch- ropeans learn bishop of many lan- Canterbury guages, Amer- LIPO $750 Per Area or if our plans icans learn for Iraq were only Eng- $200 Off just an exam- lish. 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Based on percent- 6183 Paseo Del Norte, Carlsbad, CA age of fat removal. emergency electrical power to shore PIN DROP, cont’d. on Page 26 For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • [email protected] February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS 7 READER INPUT ‘Lone Survivor’: From a Marine Corps spouse perspective Firstly, no spoiler alerts but if any- make sure the men are resolute so they one has yet to see this movie please do! can do their jobs to the best of their Ladies, do not think this is just anoth- Steel ability. We signed up to love these men LETTER TO er ‘war-manly-movie’ because it’s not Magnolias through absolutely everything that (even though Mark Walhberg is enough of the Corps they see and do in battle whether they THE EDITOR reason to watch). If you or your loved come back all in one piece or not. one has sensitive PTSD triggers, be By Crystal Arriaga We as spouses also get to witness I am shocked and appalled at forewarned and research the reviews a the ups and downs before, during and the cartoonist picture of your Com- bit. For the civilian masses, it’s an ex- at home when they’re in a third world after deployments — whether they are mander in Chief and the disparag- cellent display of what our military to- country far from American soil. combat or non-combat. Sometimes as ing remarks in your Jan. 1, 2014 edi- day endure. I became so enveloped and Being gone even for a short time a helpless bystander to this life, we tion. That is traitorous. YOU are a invested in this movie to the point of can be a hard thing to endure for any watch as they change each and every disgrace. being shocked, speechless and moved healthy relationship. For the ladies time they’ll be gone for six months to — From to tears. who support and maintain a marriage a year. We know it will happen; it’s just Beth Mocklin-Davis What was even more relevant as a with an infantry- a matter of how via Facebook military spouse was how it portrayed man, special op- We signed up to love these men much. Sometimes a tidbit of the spouses’ perspective of erations guy, Navy through absolutely everything that it’s a great experi- Reply from the Publisher war in the movie. No, spouses do not SEAL, etc., this they see and do in battle whether they ence, like “absence Beth, I respect your opinion. pick up rifles, endure the physical or isn’t a cakewalk. come back all in one piece or not. makes the heart Naturally you have a right (free mental hardships or enlist like the ser- The men are train- grow fonder,” and speech)… but so does the Military vice members do. What we do see in ing six months out of the year for the sometimes we notice other changes Press. As far as being traitorous… “Lone Survivor” is their ladies’ unwav- deployment and even when they’re that weren’t there before. we feel that If any Administration ering and dedicated love and strength “here,” they’re not “here” because As much as I’d love to chat with the — Democratic or Republican — to these men while waiting at home. they have to be focused and learning. spouses of “Lone Survivor” for their covers up the killing of American As Marine Corps spouses, we take Then they turn around and are on the wisdom and opinions, I’m thankful it personnel as they have in Benghazi, classes to acclimate ourselves to this deployment for six months or more gave the nation a good look at what the leader should be Impeached or lifestyle and learn everything possible, obviously even more focused because some of our perspective has been for the responsible party should be ex- from military lingo to traditions and sometimes it’s for the safety and wel- the past 10+ years. posed and fired. Wouldn’t you think customs of holidays and events. We try fare of their brothers and themselves. Questions or comments? Email us that this act is more traitorous than to keep family informed of big deploy- Even though we’re fully aware of the at Military Press at keepinformed@ a mere photo? ment changes, send packages and nec- peril and vulnerabilities out there lurk- militarypress.com! You can also follow — Richard Matz, Publisher, essary equipment or motivational pho- ing around every corner, we Spartan- my blog @ http://marinecorpswives101. Military Press Newspaper tos to make our service members feel esque spouses do whatever it takes to wordpress.com/.

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8 February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS www.MilitaryPress.com • [email protected] 30 minutes to more love Let’s start with watch your wed- a riddle. Other ding video and/or than your spouse Marriage flip through your and your best wedding album. friend, what NON- Fitness If your spouse is relative was by with Mort Fertel up for it, then do your side almost it together. Relive every moment those special mo- during your wed- ments again. Re- ding including the reception? member together. Do you remember that pesty person Can you remember what it felt like who followed you everywhere? No, I to feed each other that first bite of the said OTHER THAN YOUR SPOUSE. wedding cake? Do you remember your The photographer! (and maybe the first dance? Do you remember being video person too) introduced as Mr. and Mrs. ----? Do Why do we spend so much money you remember the best man’s speech? on a wedding album? Why do we allow Most importantly, can you remember a complete stranger to intrude upon the joy you felt? such a personal celebration? The an- Remembering that special night to- swer is simple. Because we don’t want gether can be special NOW. the evening to end. We desperately You know, certain therapies pre- want to take those few hours and pre- scribe smiling and laughing as a heal- serve them forever. ing for depression. There is research There IS something magical about that shows that smiling and laughing watching your wedding video or flip- releases bio chemicals into your sys- ping through your wedding album. It tem that causes you to FEEL better. transports you to another time and Of course, the benefit of feeling better place. If you allow yourself, it can is not just temporary; it causes more bring back your wedding night smile. productive BEHAVIORS. And produc- You can feel like a newlywed again, if tive behaviors cause you to feel bet- only for a few moments. ter. Can you see how what you do is Your assignment this week is to LOVE, cont’d. on Page 26

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For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • [email protected] February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS 9 New rapid response program for California vets Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of necting them and their families to local California veterans face a number of 22 veterans commit suicide every day, America (IAVA) has announced expan- resources and to one-on-one support critical challenges. More than 400,000 and a new study has found that the sui- sion of its Rapid Response Referral with IAVA’s Veteran Transition Manag- veterans are stuck in the VA backlog, cide rate among young male veterans Program (RRRP) to the Los Angeles ers. It helps cut through red tape and including about 10,000 each in the Los rose by 44 percent in the past three and San Diego areas to support Califor- proves vets and their families access to Angeles and San Diego Regional Of- years. New veterans are also now fac- nia veterans. services ranging across employment, fices and more than 12,000 in the Oak- ing a cut to their retirement as a result RRRP is a new approach to support- education, housing, mental health care land Regional Office. Suicide remains of a bipartisan budget deal. ing post-9-11 veterans by directly con- and more. a top concern for new veterans: at least Veterans can contact a RRRP case manager by calling 855-91-RAPID (855- STORAGE 917-2743), emailing transition@iava. org, or visiting www.IAVA.org/RRRP.

Stateside Tricare service centers closing April 1 All stateside Tricare in-person service centers will be closing April 1, Tri- care officials recently confirmed. The closure of the 189 facilities is expected to save the Defense Depart- ment about $50 million a year, officials said. The Tricare Service Centers, which handle about 137,000 visitors a month, are staffed by contractors and handle issues ranging from processing provider changes to billing problems. “The change will not -- let me re- peat that -- will not affect any Tricare medical benefit or health care service,” Army Col. Steve Warren, a DoD spokes- man said in a statement. “What it will do is allow the department to save $250 million over the next five years, allow- ing Tricare to invest in more important services.” All of the services currently dealt with by service center staff can be currently handled exclusively over the phone, they said.

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The San Diego District Tennis As- gram that has provided tennis-based ticipate in the May 2014 camp, and as a tax-deductible contribution, checks sociation (SDDTA), in collaboration rehabilitation to over 600 wounded, ill, in previous years, the SDDTA is work- of any amount may be written to Ten- with the U.S. Tennis Association, Naval and injured service members and vet- ing with local businesses, disabled nis Lovers for Charity, and delivered or Medical Center San Diego, and Balboa erans from all the military branches to sports clubs, community support orga- sent to the San Diego District Tennis Tennis Club, will host the Third Annual aid in their physical and emotional re- nizations and individuals to cover all Association, 2221 Morley Field Dr., San National Tennis Camp for Wounded coveries since 2009. participants’ airfare, lodging, meals, Diego, CA 92104.In-kind donations are Warriors from May 19-25, 2014 in San Over 50 wounded, ill, and injured transportation, tennis equipment and also welcome. Please contact sddta@ Diego. service members and veterans from instruction. yahoo.com or 619-299-8647 for more in- This event is a part of a proven pro- across the country are expected to par- If you would like to help by making formation.

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Military Bills open military to some 10% illegal immigrants Discount Lawmakers meeting with military call for details recruiting officials recently said they support efforts to open up the armed services to men and women who were brought into the country illegally, but as children. Reps. Mike Coffman, R-Colo., and Jeff Denham, R-Calif., both have bills that would give this group of men and women a chance to serve and go on to legal permanent residency and apply for citizenship, the Congressmen testi- fied at a hearing of the House Armed Services Committee’s military personnel panel. Denham said he joined the military Robert Shumway, MD. FACS | 858-587-2640 | 9834 Genesee Ave. Ste. 225 Scripps La Jolla Campus at 17, while still in high school. In the www.ShumwayCosmeticSurgery.com military he met a number of Filipinos who joined up and later became citi- Diplomate: American Board of Cosmetic Surgery, American Board of Laser Surgery, zens. & American Board of Facial Plastic Surgery For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • [email protected] February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS 11 Veterans small Veteran groups worry cuts to business expo in Oceanside retirement is only first step The Veteran Entrepreneur Asso- ciation and Veterans Small Business By Leo Shane III Tarantino, chief policy officer for Iraq moaned the military retirement chang- Association Foundation are sponsor- Stars and Strips and Afghanistan Veterans of America. es but said fixing the problem later was ing a Veterans Small Business Expo WASHINGTON — With Congress “When times get tough, people say ev- preferable to jeopardizing budget har- from 8 a.m. to 7 p.m. on Saturday, back this week, veterans groups are eryone has to sacrifice. But not every- mony now. At least 14 separate bills to Feb. 8 at the Veterans Association of vowing to resume their fight against one has been sacrificing for the last 10 repeal the cut have been introduced in North County, 1617 Mission Avenue, trims to military retirement benefits. years.” the two weeks since the deal passed. Oceanside. Keynote speaker is Capt. But what they’re really fighting The cut is a 1 percent trim on cost- In the last week, editorial boards at Joseph John (Navy, Ret.) for is relevancy, and to make sure the of-living increases for working-age USA Today and the Washington Post The sponsoring organizations country hasn’t forgotten about them. military retirees. Veterans 62 and have called the veterans’ opposition were formed to help veterans build Military advocates worry that Con- older won’t see any changes. But those out of touch, noting that the military’s a better life for themselves and gress’ willingness to attack veterans’ younger — including medically retired generous retirement benefits aren’t their families by becoming entre- retirement checks shows that lawmak- servicemembers — will see their annu- comparable to any private sector pen- preneurs. The goal is to help ease ers — and perhaps the public — have al increases trimmed starting in Janu- sions. The Post called it a “dishonor” the transition from military life to already moved on from the wars of the ary 2016. not to change a military retirement civilian life; to help veterans be- last decade, and that the sacrifices and The move will save about $6.3 bil- system long overdue for an update. come business owners, build a last- promises made will be forgotten. lion over 10 years, and was included as But veterans groups argue that work ing income, and achieve the goal of “This is what happens when you part of a budget deal designed to avert is underway, in the form of a compensa- homeownership. For more informa- have an unengaged population whose another government shutdown. tion commission reviewing large-scale tion, visit vsbaf.org. focus starts to shift away,” said Tom Lawmakers who backed the deal be- changes to military pay and benefits. COMMUNITY Career fair for veterans and spouses RecruitMilitary, a full service military-to-civilian recruiting firm, is hosting a career fair at Liberty Station’s NTC Promenade, Corky McMillin Event Center, 2875 Dewey San Diego from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Making Military Thursday, Feb. 27. The event is designed to connect veterans and their spouses with companies that value life easier. their talent and experience. Just a sampling of companies attending include USAA, Schlum- berger, Alcoa, Military Sealift Com- mand, Baker Hughes, Seagate, St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, Verizon, Prudential and more. For more information, visit http:// RecruitMilitary.com. Sears sets goal of hiring 6,500 vets in 2014 Sears Holdings Corp. is anticipat- ing hiring 6,500 veterans and military spouses in 2014, the company announced. Sears hired 6,000 veterans and spouses in 2013 and currently em- ploys 30,000 veteran associates company-wide, many of whom are ac- tively serving in the National Guard and Reserve forces. Navy’s Acting Undersecretary forced to resign The Navy’s acting undersecretary resigned under pressure from Navy Secretary Ray Mabus following allegations of sexual misconduct with a subordinate, Pentagon sources said. Mabus asked for the resigna- tion of Robert Martinage, who has The Armed Services YMCA of the USA supports young, been serving as undersecretary of enlisted service members and their families with low and the Navy since last June, “following no-cost programs and services to make military life easier. a loss of confidence in Martinage’s abilities to effectively perform his duties,” Mabus’ office said in a Donate / Volunteer / find a Branch near you statement. Making Military Mabus acted after allegations asyMCa.org life easier™ surfaced that Martinage had en- gaged in inappropriate conduct with a woman who worked for him, a Pentagon source said. 12 February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS www.MilitaryPress.com • [email protected] World’s dirtiest man, literally By Sumitra www.odditycentral.com Eighty-year-old Haji be- lieves that “cleanliness brings him sickness.” That’s why he hasn’t bathed at all in the past 60 years. He lives in isolation in Dejgah village, in the Southern Iranian prov- ince of Fars. Haji hates contact with water. Even the suggestion of a bath makes him very ing to lose, nothing to fear. angry. And all these years of escaping Makes you think about what’s bath time have taken their toll – Haji is really important in life, doesn’t it? almost the color of earth. He has man- Haji isn’t the only person in aged to completely blend in with his the world who hates bathing. Two surroundings. In fact, it’s easy to mis- years ago, we wrote about Kailash take him for a rock statue if he sits very Singh, an Indian man who hadn’t still. taken a bath in 38 years. It’s not just bathing that Haji dis- likes. His disgust for fresh food and ENTERTAINMENT clean drinking water is unmistakable. Instead, he prefers his favorite meal of rotten porcupine meat. He drinks 5 li- ters of water a day for health purposes, but only from a large rusty oil can. He likes to fill his smoking pipe with ani- mal feces instead of tobacco. To trim his hair he doesn’t use clippers; he just burns it off over an open flame. An old war helmet keeps his head warm during the winter. Haji doesn’t really have a house – the earth is his home. He lives in a hole in the ground, much like a grave, to keep him grounded and in touch with the reality of life. Sometimes he sleeps in an open brick shack that the villagers constructed for him out of pity. Lo- cally, he is known as Amou Haji. ‘Amou’ is the Farsi term of endearment for a kind old man. Haji’s lifestyle of choice is very unique. The villagers say that he had suffered severe emotional setbacks in his youth, which led him to make these extreme choices. Even so, he does seem a lot happier than some people who live in large homes with comforts and conveniences. Haji doesn’t seem to have a care in the world. He has noth-

Free legal clinic adds discharge upgrades and VA disability appeals for veterans The Veterans Legal Clinic at the University of San Diego (USD) School of Law has expanded its free legal services for California veterans needing assistance with discharge upgrades and Veterans Administration (VA) disability claims appeals. "Assistance navigating VA disability claims appeals and discharge upgrades are two of the least offered services for the veteran community today," said Vet- erans Legal Clinic Supervising Attorney Robert Muth. To get free legal help, call 619-260-7470 or visit sandiego.edu/veteransclinic.

For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • [email protected] February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS 13 SHOCKING EVIDENCE SHOWS IT COULD HAVE HAPPENED Did Adolph Hitler escape? Conducting interviews on this topic is the author of Hunting Hitler: New fragments the Russians have claimed Scientific Evidence That Hitler Es- for decades are proof Hitler committed caped Germany, Dr. Jerome Corsi. Ev- suicide. Bellatoni’s startling findings eryone knows Adolf Hitler committed prompted Corsi to investigate further. suicide by gunshot in his underground “What caused me to question Hitler’s bunker on April 30, 1945. At least, that suicide was Bellatoni’s DNA analysis has been the conventional wisdom. that proved conclusively the skull frag- Now comes WND senior staff reporter ments belonged not to Hitler, but to a Jerome R. Corsi’s new book, “Hunting 40-year-old woman unrelated to Eva Hitler: New Scientific Evidence That Braun,” Corsi said. In “Hunting Hitler,” Hitler Escaped Germany.” Corsi posits Hitler made his way to Examining declassified FBI and Argentina with the help of U.S. intel- U.S. military intelligence files, Corsi ligence agents that had been secretly makes a compelling case that U.S. in- working with the Nazis since 1943. vestigators suspected from the begin- Allen Dulles, then an agent of the Of- ning Hitler had escaped. For political fice of Strategic Services, or OSS, the purposes, the evidence indicates, they predecessor agency to the CIA, was were willing to go along with the cover communicating secretly with top Nazis story that in the final days of World from his office in Bern, Switzerland, War II, Hitler married his mistress, Eva Corsi said. Braun, and the two took their lives in a Corsi brings to light many troubling joint-suicide ritual just before the So- questions, including: viet army entered Berlin. But the truth • Why were the Americans unable is, no one actually saw Hitler commit to obtain physical evidence of Hitler’s suicide. There are no photographs doc- remains after the Russians absconded umenting a joint suicide of Hitler and with his body? Eva Braun, and the bodies of the two • Why did both Stalin and Eisenhow- were never recovered or preserved for er doubt Hitler’s demise? positive identification. In 2009, Corsi • Why did nobody in Hitler’s bunker pointed out, Nicholas Bellatoni, the hear any shots fired? Connecticut state archaeologist, was al- • Did U.S. intelligence agents in lowed by the Russian Federation State Europe, including the OSS and Allen Archive in Moscow to examine skull Dulles (who later headed the CIA un-

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14 February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS www.MilitaryPress.com • [email protected] story Hitler and Eva U-530 purported to Braun committed sui- be the type of vessel cide was a cover story, LOOK. FEEL. BE. designed by U.S. intel- in which Hitler ligence agents at the escaped. end of World War II to YOUR BEST. facilitate the escape not only of Hitler and Eva Braun, but also of ‘New Year, New You’ Special Offer top Nazi war criminals Book your FREE Consultation Today such as Adolf Eich- mann who was discov- $1000 OFF ANY LIPO OR SURGERY ered in 1960 hiding scheduled by 2/15/14 and done by 5/15/14 in Argentina,” Corsi argued. He presents Ask about our Breast Augmentation & Mommy Makeover Special Military offers. documentary evidence Allen Dulles’ wartime mission in Switzerland der President Eisenhower), aid Hitler’s included helping Mar- Awarded escape, as they did with so many other tin Bormann, Hitler’s secretary, to fun- “La Jolla Nazis? nel billions of dollars of Nazi ill-gotten Argentinean media reported Hitler financial gain out of Germany and in- Patients’ Choice arrived in the country and it continued vest in the U.S. and Argentinian stock Plastic to report his presence. Why have the markets to provide a financial cushion Surgery” findings not made it to the US? to survive in hiding after the war. Corsi relies on autopsy reports, in- In the National Archives at College terrogation transcripts, documents Park, Corsi discovered a clipping from from Soviet archives, CIA reports, ex- the U.S. military newspaper “The Stars tensive research in the National Ar- and Stripes” published Oct. 8, 1945, re- chives and Records Administration in porting a shocking statement made by Washington, D.C., and in College Park, General Dwight D. Eisenhower, then Md., and more to back up his case. the supreme commander of the Allied Forces. The short piece read: “There is ‘reason to believe’ that Hitler may still Did U.S. intelligence help be alive, according to a remark made Hitler get away? by Gen. Eisenhower to Dutch newspa- His evidence is shockingly abun- permen. The general’s statement re- dant, and his clear argument lends cre- versed his previous opinion that Hitler dence to a new theory that disembow- ESCAPE, cont’d. on Page 25 els the double-suicide narrative. “The ENTERTAINMENT

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Rich Ohrnberger (OG/C) With all the injuries along the offensive line this year, Ohrnberger proved his worth at both offensive guard and center. Telesco would be wise to re-sign the 6-2, 300-pound former Nittany Lion as insurance for starter Nick Hardwick who has suffered both a neck stinger and concussion in his 10th season as a Charger.

Chad Rinehart (OG) Signed as a free agent last March, the 6-5, 321-pound Rinehart played a key role in keeping Philip Rivers healthy and opening holes for running back Ryan Mathews. His ability to play both guard positions and familiar- ity playing in offensive line coach Joe D’Alessandris’ system should earn him a roster spot.

Darrell Stuckey (S) Voted Special Teams Player of the Year by his teammates, Stuckey was once again a terror on both the kickoff and punt coverage units as a gunner. He also proved his worth as a safety when both Marcus Gilchrist and Jahleel Ad- dae went down with injuries.

Reggie Walker (LB) Signed after spending his first four years in the NFL with Arizona Cardi- nals, the 6-0, 244-pound Walker started six games and proved to be a valuable spark on the defense. He finished 11th on the team with 36 tackles (30 solo); 3 sacks; 1 pass defensed and 1 forced fumble. He had 5 tackles in the Wild- card victory over the Bengals and his all-out hustle to tackle LeSean McCoy 70 yards down field that saved a touchdown in the Eagles game was one of the highlight plays in the Chargers season.

Seyi Ajirotutu (WR) The Chargers signed the talented wide receiver to add depth to the re- ceiving corps after Malcom Floyd was lost for the year with a neck injury. De- spite his limited action at receiver, he caught the game-winning touchdown over the Kansas City Chiefs with 24 seconds left in the game. Along with CHARGERS, cont’d. on Page 26 16 February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS www.MilitaryPress.com • [email protected] Wings Over America Golf Tourney Wings Over America Scholarship Foundation is holding its 2014 Annu- al Golf Tournament at the Sea ‘N Air Course aboard NAS North Island, Coro- nado, on Friday, Feb. 28. Check in 8:30 to 9:30 a.m.; Shotgun start 10 a.m. The proceeds from this event benefit scholarships for dependents of Na- val Aviation. Wings of America Schol- We’re here when arship Foundation was you need us created to provide college scholar- Assisted Living & Memory Care ships to depen- Lantern Crest Senior Living dent children tive duty, retired, honorably This tournament will be in Scram- Call for a Tour & Complimentary Lunch and spouses of discharged or deceased, who ble format. Civilian single entry fee 11010 Sunset Trail • Santee all U.S. Navy per- served within Naval Air Forces. $180; active duty entry fee $90. In- sonnel — officer Don’t miss your chance to cludes greens fees, cart, range balls, 619.258.8886 and enlisted — ac- drive away in a 2014 Range Rover continental breakfast, lunch, dinner, www.LanternCrestSeniorLiving.com Sport HSE if you hit a hole in one. The happy hour, 20 prize tickets for great invited guest for this event is Notah Be- golf goody giveaways. Non-player ticket gay III, current Gofl Channel Analyst $25. Register at www.wingsoverameri- and professional golfer. ca.us.

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OLYMPIC WEIGHTLIFTING COMPETITION 2nd annual Cupid Classic E2OlyFit, San Marcos’ new Olympic weightlifting training gym located at 1285 Stone Drive, is hosting its 2nd annual Cupid Classic Weightlifting Com- petition on Saturday, Feb. 15. BEAUTIFUL, SPACIOUS HOMES You’ve put in your long hours working out, lifting and training, now come ON EXTRA-LARGE HOMESITES. on out and show us what you’ve got. Introducing Big Sky at Audie Murphy Ranch, big beautiful homes situated This is a sanctioned event #33-14-15; on large homesites now selling in Menifee. Spacious, stylish and smart USAW rules apply. Awards go to 1st, 2nd and 3rd for floorplan designs deliver on the Brookfield Residential promise of creating each open weight class men and wom- the best places to call home! We look forward to welcoming you. en. 1st 2nd and 3rd to School-age / Ju- niors / Masters Sinclair Formula. Also

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Entry fee is $50. Visit www.wepay. N MAP NOT TO SCALE com/events/2nd-annual-cupid-classic N 30535 Buckboard Lane | Menifee, CA 92584MAP NOT TO SCALE and register today. Model Homes Open Daily 10a.m. - 5p.m. Copyright © 2014 Big Sky. All Rights Reserved. Plan, pricing and product information subject to change. For more information, call Edgar or 1p.m. - 5p.m. on Wednesdays Corporate BRE license #00991326. 1/2014 Evelyn at 951-522-5055. For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • [email protected] February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS 17 Room to dream at Big Sky MENIFEE, CA — Homebuyers who in new home luxury within this popular are focused on beautifully spacious de- Menifee community. Priced from the signs and extra-large homesites for fam- high $300,000s, family-oriented buyers ily living continue to make Big Sky at appreciate the open, versatile floor- Audie Murphy Ranch a favorite choice. plans that can accommodate their ex- Presented by Brookfield Residential, pectations now and for years to come. this neighborhood offers the ultimate “Big Sky was designed to surpass

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the goals of growing families and its larity is the availability of expansive impressively sized floorplans connect homesites where outdoor dining and with buyers whose priorities include entertainment become a way of life. It elegance, versatility and abundant is indoor/outdoor living at its best, and growing room,” said Rocky Tracy, Vice an outstanding address for homebuy- President of Sales ers who want to for Brookfield Resi- plan their fam- dential. “With up to Surrounded by magnificent ily’s future with six bedrooms, large confidence.” gathering spaces trees and century-old rock Big Sky pres- that bring people formations, rugged silhou- ents one- and together and plenty two-story single- of storage for toys ettes of the San Jacinto and family detached and sports equip- San Bernardino mountains homes with 3 to ment, Big Sky has provide a majestic backdrop 6 bedrooms and the elements fami- 2.5 to 5.5 baths lies are looking to this special destination. in approximate- for. Highlights that ly 2,790 to 3,800 include expansive dining rooms for square feet. Floorplans include over- special occasions, great rooms with sized bedrooms, super laundry/work optional fireplaces, private first floor rooms, abundant closet space and 3- or living suites, bonus rooms and outdoor 4-car garages to store RVs, boats, dirt rooms embrace both the luxury and bikes and ATVs. Individual designs practical priorities for today’s buyers. have the option of a private first-floor Further enhancing Big Sky’s popu- living suite with or without a kitch- enette. This innovative feature offers HOUSING residents a living area with its own side entrance that is still connected to the house yet offers exceptional privacy. The Residence 3 has the option of a Are you a VETERAN The VA loan program is a deck off the master bedroom. Audie Murphy Ranch is a new planning to BUY or flexible solution designed master-planned community set amidst 1,100 rolling acres of homes, parks and REFINANCE a home? to make homeownership timeless beauty. Surrounded by mag- more affordable for you. nificent trees and century-old rock formations, rugged silhouettes of the San Jacinto and San Bernardino mountains provide a majestic backdrop to this special destination. Bordering an ecologi- cal preserve, Salt Creek is within the “Where the Primary focus is you.” center of Audie Murphy Ranch, while miles of meandering trails and paseos link residents to community amenities. PROGRAM HIGHLIGHTS Chris Wiley The community’s location near the • VA Jumbo - Up to $1,000,000 Branch Manager I-15 and I-215 freeways offers conve- NMLS #: 240137 nient access to business and leisure • No monthly MI from San Diego to San Bernardino. For • VA NO-NO to $500,000 Sales Price (800) 920-3145 more details, please visit www.Audi- [email protected] eMurphyRanch.com. • Great Rates 2124 Arnold Way • Alpine, CA 91901 The Big Sky Model Homes are PRMI NMLS: 3094. PRMI is an Equal Housing Lender. DISCLAIMER: Some products and open daily from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., and services may not be available in all states. Credit and collateral are subject to approval. Terms 22 Years of VA EQUAL HOUSING Wednesdays from 1 p.m. to 5 p.m. OPPORTUNITY and conditions apply. This is not a commitment to lend. Programs, rates, terms and conditions are subject to change without notice. Licensed by the Department of Business Oversight under the Experience For more information, please call California Residential Mortgage Lending Act #4130403. 888.537.9633 or visit www.BigSky- Brookfield.com. 18 February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS www.MilitaryPress.com • [email protected] NOW IS THE TIME Great low interest rates. Brand new homesites selling quickly. It’s time to discover all that Built to Order ™ has to offer you!

Rancho Santalina Haciendas in San Marcos The Pinnacle at Roripaugh Ranch in Temecula From the high $400s From the high $300s • 2,224–2,778 sq. ft., 3–6 bedrooms, 2.5–3.5 baths • 2,196–4,216 sq. ft., 3–7 bedrooms, 2.5–5 baths • commuter friendly; close to Palomar College Sprinter Station • master-planned gated community with great on-site amenities • solar power system included as standard feature • solar power system included as standard feature From Hwy. 78, exit Rancho Santa Fe Rd. heading north. Turn left on S. Santa Fe Ave. and right on Las Flores From I-15 or I-215, exit Murrieta Hot Springs Rd. heading east and travel approx. 4.5 mi. Turn right on Crown Dr. to sales center. (760) 295-3211 Ranch Rd. to sales center. (951) 239-1635

Broker Cooperation Welcome. ©2014 KB Home (KBH). A 1.4kW solar power system is included as a standard component of a new KB home at Rancho Santalina Haciendas. A 1.5kW solar power system is included as a standard component of a new KB home at The Pinnacle at Roripaugh Ranch. Energy bill savings are based on estimated monthly costs for electricity and gas for a home as designed (not as built) with the corresponding solar power system compared to estimated monthly costs for electricity and gas without the system. KBH makes no guarantee of energy production by any solar power system installed with a home or of energy costs or savings, if any, experienced by any homeowner. Energy costs and savings, if any, will vary by floor plan, home size, occupancy, daily activities, appliance usage, thermostat settings, climate conditions and orientation of the home and the solar power system size and operating conditions, among other factors. KBH reserves the right to modify, discontinue or replace any solar options at any time without prior notice. Other restrictions and limitations may apply. Solar power systems are supplied by SunPower Corporation®. KBH and SunPower Corporation are independent companies. SunPower and the SunPower logo are trademarks or registered trademarks of SunPower Corporation. See Built to Order™ options and upgrades offered at KB Home Studio. All options/upgrades require additional charges and ordering at predetermined stages of construction, and are subject to change/discontinuation anytime by KB Home. KB Home is not a custom homebuilder. Plans, pricing, financing, terms, availability and specifications subject to change/prior sale without notice and may vary by neighborhood, lot location and home series. Buyer responsible for all taxes, insurance and other fees. Sq. footage is approximate. HOA applies. Photos may depict upgraded landscaping/options and may not represent lowest-priced homes. See sales representative for details. KB Home Sales–Southern California Inc. (CA Real Estate License 00242327). SOCAL-114955

For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • [email protected] February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS 19 Ronald Reagan 40th President of the United States Served from Jan. 20, 1981 to Jan. 20, 1989 “A taxpayer is someone who works for the federal government but doesn’t have to take a civil-service exam.” — Ronald Reagan

1986 Cadillac Fleetwood

George H.W. Bush 43rd Vice President of the United States killing its Served from Jan. 20, 1981 to Jan. 20, 1989 crew of six astro- nauts and the school- World events many thousands more were ex- teacher Christa McAu- • Halley’s Comet reaches its peri- posed to significant amounts of liffe. helion, the closest point to the Earth, radioactive material, vast • Voyager 2 space during its second visit to territories in Ukraine probe makes first en- the solar system in and Belarus rendered counter with Uranus the 20th cen- uninhabitable. • The Soviet Union tury. • Desmond Tutu launches the Mir space station cating them in the sale • A bomb elected Anglican arch- • British surgeons per- bishop of Capetown, of weapons to Iran and form the world’s first becomes the first channeling the proceeds triple transplant (heart, black to lead the to help fund the Contra lung and liver) Anglican Church in rebels in Nicaragua. South Africa. • Clint Eastwood elected mayor of Carmel, California Sports • World Series: N.Y. Mets 4 • Georgia sodomy law upheld by games to 3 over the Boston Red U.S. News Supreme Court (5-4) • The first federal Martin Luther Sox • Antonin Scalia appointed to Su- King Day, honoring Martin Luther • Super Bowl: Chicago Bears preme Court Desmond Tutu King Jr. win 46-10 over the New England • William Rehnquist, sworn in as • Hands Across America - 6 million Patriots Chief Justice of Supreme Court explodes on a TWA flight from Rome people hold hands from California to • NBA Finals: Boston Celtics • White teenagers beat blacks in to Athens - 4 dead New York win 4 games to 2 over the Howard Beach, New York • In Ukraine, one of the reactors at • Iran-Contra Affair: National Se- Houston Rockets the Chernobyl nuclear plant explodes curity Council member Oliver North creating the world’s worst nuclear di- and his secretary Fawn Hall start to Technology Popular saster. 31 are killed di- shred doc- • Chunnel announced rectly by the incident, uments (tunnel connecting Britain culture • The impli- & France under the Eng- lish Channel) Legend of • Space Shuttle Chal- Zelda is lenger disintegrates 73 released for seconds after launch, the Nintendo Entertainment System. • Howard Stern radio

Howard Stern

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20 February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS www.MilitaryPress.com • [email protected] remember when...

986AVERAGE COST 1 OF LIVING • Income per year .... $22,339 • Minimum wage ...... $3.35 • New house ...... $89,463 • New car ...... $9,281 • Gallon of gas ...... 93¢ • Dozen eggs ...... 87¢ show returns to New York City BORN IN 1994: Above right: Daniel Craig. Above • Gallon of milk ...... 93¢ morning radio (WXRK 92.3 FM) left: Jane Krakowski, Terry Crews, Jeri Ryan, $ • Turner Broadcasting begins to Hugh Jackman. • Loaf of bread ...... 1.10 colorize black and white movie clas- sics. Popular films • First-class stamp ...... • Wrestlemania II at 3 locations, • Top Gun 24¢ Hulk Hogan beats King Kong • Crocodile Dundee $ Bundy • Platoon • Movie ticket ...... 2.75 • The Karate Kid, Part II • Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home • Aliens • Ruthless People Popular music • The Color of Money • That’s What Friends Are For, • The Money Pit Dionne and Friends • Say You, Say Me, Lionel Richie Popular TV shows • I Miss You, Klymaxx • Magnum, P.I. • On My Own, Patti Labelle and • Falcon Crest Michael McDonald • Hill Street Blues • Broken Wings, Mr. Mister • Cagney and Lacey • How Will I Know, Whitney Houston • The A-Team • Party All The Time, Eddie Murphy • Murder, She Wrote • Burning Heart, Survivor • Addicted to Love, Robert Palmer • Kyrie, Mr. Mister • Greatest Love of All, Whitney Houston

Born in 1968 • Will Smith • Molly Ringwald • Aaron Eckhart • Gillian Anderson • Naomi Watts • Brendan Fraser • Josh Brolin • Owen Wilson • Lucy Liu

1986 Chevy Camaro Hulk Hogan and King Kong Bundy

For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • [email protected] February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS 21 Second opinion no better more...” “Like this?” “Yes. Does that good money there. But on the other than the first hurt?” “A little bit.” “Now stretch it hand, I thought I might write a book over your head!” about my experience here in the hos- A patient has a sore throat and goes pital, what it’s like to be a patient here. to a doctor to get treatment for it. People might be interested in reading Doctor: Your tonsils got to come out. You picked a fine time to a book like that. In addition, I thought I Patient: I want second opinion. tell me… Bob might go back to college and study art Doctor: Okay, you’re ugly, too. After a long night of making love, history, which I’ve grown interested in the young guy rolled over, pulled out a lately.” Dr. Leroy nods and says, “Yes, cigarette from his jeans and searched What is the answer? those all sound like intriguing possi- for his lighter. Unable to find it, A teacher was giving a les- bilities.” The patient replies, “And the he asked the girl if she had one at son on the circulation of the best part is, in my spare time, I can go hand. “There might be some matches Just blood. Trying to make the mat- on being a teapot. ter clearer, he said: “Now, stu- in the top drawer,” she replied. He for dents, if I stood on my head the opened the drawer of the bedside blood, as you know, would run table and found a box of matches sit- Rundown runaround A woman goes to her doctor com- into it, and I should turn red in ting neatly on top of a framed picture plaining that she is exhausted all the Laughs the face.” of another man. Naturally, the guy be- time. After the diagnostic tests showed “Yes, sir,” the boys said. gan to worry. “Is this your husband?” nothing, the doctor gets around to ask- Kid’s too smart for you “Then why is it that while I am he inquired nervously. “No, silly,” she ing her how often she has intercourse. A little kid walks into a city bus and standing upright in the ordinary po- replied, snuggling up to him. “Your “Every Monday, Wednesday, and sits right behind the driver and starts sition the blood doesn’t run into my boyfriend then?” he asked. “No, not Saturday,” she says. yelling, “If my dad was a bull and my feet?” at all,” she said, nibbling away at his The doctor advises her to cut out mom a cow I’d be a little bull.” The A little fellow shouted, “’It’s be- ear. “Well, who is he then?” demanded Wednesday. driver starts getting mad at the noisy cause yer feet ain’t empty.” the bewildered guy. Calmly, the girl “I can’t,” says the woman. “That’s kid, who continues with, “If my dad replied, “That’s me before the opera- the only night I’m home with my hus- was an elephant and my mom a girl ele- tion.” How bad could it be? band.” phant I would be a little elephant.” The A woman goes to her doctor who kid goes on with several animals until verifies that she is pregnant. This is Still cray-cray the bus driver gets angry and yells at her first pregnancy. The doctor asks Dr. Leroy, the head psychiatrist at You had to ask Boy: Baby tell me something that the kid, “What if your dad was gay and her if she has any questions. She re- the local mental hospital, is examin- makes me happy and angry at the same your mom was a prostitute?!” The plies, “Well, I’m a little worried about ing patients to see if they’re cured time. kid smiles and says, “I would be a bus the pain. How much will childbirth and ready to re-enter society. “So, Mr. Girl: You’ve got a bigger one than all driver!” hurt?” The doctor answered, “Well, Clark,” the doctor says to one of his pa- your friends. that varies from woman to woman and tients, “I see by your chart that you’ve Coordinating color pregnancy to pregnancy and besides, been recommended for dismissal. Do A patient came to his dentist with it’s difficult to describe pain.” “I know, you have any idea what you might do Date envy problems with his teeth. but can’t you give me some idea?,” she once you’re released?” The patient Dating a stripper is like eating a Patient: Doctor, I have yellow teeth, asks. “Grab your upper lip and pull thinks for a moment, then replies, noisy bag of chips in church… everyone what do I do? it out a little...” “Like this?” “A lit- “Well, I went to school for mechanical looks at you in disgust, but deep down Dentist: Wear a brown tie! tle more...” “Like this?” “No. A little engineering. That’s still a good field, inside they want some too.

ACROSS 1. Melancholy 6. Schnozzola 10. Aquatic plant 14. Female internal reproductive organ 15. Not under 16. Standard 17. About a US quart 18. Roman emperor 19. Brother of Jacob 20. Disarrayed 22. Collections 23. Female chickens 24. Main course 26. Grasped 30. French for “Summer” 31. Comes after Mi and Fah 32. Wings 33. Desserts 35. Discourage 39. Biggest SUDOKU 41. Captive The rules to play Sudoku are quite simple. Fill in the blanks 43. Ceased so that each row, each column, and each of the nine 3x3 grids 44. 365 days 68. Female demon 8. Arid 37. Auspices contain one instance of each of the numbers 1 through 9. 46. Colored part of an eye 69. Away from the wind 9. Wears away 38. A musical pause 47. Excluding 70. Focusing glass 10. Painkiller 40. Biblical kingdom 49. Actress Lupino 71. Construct 11. Unsuccessful person 42. Give a speech This week’s solutions: 50. Outlay 12. Grille 45. An apparition 51. Movie house DOWN 13. Entertain 48. Anagram of “Steals” 54. Devil tree 1. Valuable metal 21. Oceans 51. Punctuation mark 56. Smell 2. 57 in Roman 25. Gestures of assent 52. Something to shoot for 57. A type of craftsman numerals 26. Fit 53. French for “Our” 63. Of higher order 3. Horse feed 27. Distinctive flair 55. Enough 64. A period of discounted 4. Chocolate cookie 28. Piecrust ingredient 58. Container weight prices 5. Gift of the Magi 29. Pervert 59. Winglike 65. Dish 6. A person of no 34. Of questionable 60. Identical 66. Shopping place influence legality 61. Ear-related PUZZLE PAGE 67. God of love 7. Supervise 36. Tropical tuber 62. Tidy

22 February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS www.MilitaryPress.com • [email protected] What’s the…. Get your mind out of the • You consider your license plate • After making love you ask your What’s the definition of macho? Jog- gutter personalized because your dad made it date to roll down the window. in prison. • If going to the bathroom in the ging home from your own vasectomy. How fast can you guess these words? • You have been fired from a con- middle of the night involves putting What’s the difference between a 1. ---k struction job because of your appear- on shoes a jacket and grabbing a flash- good lawyer and a great lawyer? A 2. --ndom ance. light. good lawyer knows the law, but a great 3. d-ck • You need one more hole punched • Your dog can’t watch you eat with- lawyer knows the judge. Answers: in your card to get a freebie at the out gagging. What’s the difference between a 1. Book House of Tattoos. • You have a Hefty bag on the pas- hamster and a cow? Cows survive the 2. Rancom • You need an estimate from your senger side window of your car. branding. 3. Duck barber before you get a haircut. • You have a very special baseball What’s the difference between a If you got just one right, you’re • The biggest fashion risk you take is cap, just for formal occasions. new husband and a new dog. After above average. a year, the dog is still excited to see which plaid you’ll wear to the 4-H Fair. • You bought a VCR so you could you. What’s the difference between • You have flowers planted in a bath- tape wrestling while you are at work. Mad Cow disease and PMS? Nothing. You’re mostly likely a room appliance in your front yard. • Your dad walks you to school be- redneck if… • Someone in your family says cause you are both in the same grade. Quick wit • Someone asks to see your ID and “Cum’n here an’ lookit this afore I • Your wife has a beer belly and you flush it.” find it attractive. Why are hangovers better than you show them your belt buckle. • Your wife weighs more then your • You go Christmas shopping for women? Hangovers will go away. • Your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare. refrigerator. your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and • You mow your lawn and find a car. you only need to buy one gift. Why are roach clips called roach • Your dog and your wallet are both clips? Because “pot holder” was al- on chains. ready taken. • You have lost at least one tooth ENTERTAINMENT opening a beer bottle. Q: What’s grey, yellow, grey, yellow, • Jack Daniel’s makes your list of grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, “most admired people.” grey, yellow? A: An elephant rolling • Your house doesn’t have curtains, down a hill with a daisy in its mouth! but your truck does. • You have started a petition to Q. How do you know when your cat’s change the National Anthem to “Geor- done cleaning herself? A. She’s smok- gia on My Mind.” ing a cigarette. • You call your boss “Buddy” on a regular basis. Careful how you phrase it Girl Cop: “You have the right to re- main silent. Anything you say or do will be used against you.” Guy: “Boobs!”

You never get the punch line Boy: Wanna here a joke about my private parts? Nevermind, its to long. Girl: Wanna here a joke about my private parts? Nevermind, you’ll never get it.

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ESCAPE man supporters of Hitler then living in Cont’d. from Page 14 Argentina, designed and constructed an elaborate resort residence for Hit- HELP CARRY OUR WOUNDED WARRIORS HOME. was dead.” Corsi asks why Eisenhow- ler and Eva Braun, Residencia Inalco, er’s shocking claim has gone largely located in a remote area between San unreported in U.S. newspapers and his- Carlos de Bariloce Villa La Angostura, tory books even until today. bordering the Nahuel Haupi Lake, outside the city of Bariloche, in the prov- Was Hitler on the U-530? ince of Ro Negro, Argentina.” Tracing Hitler’s escape route, Corsi In southern Argentina in the re- found in the National Archives docu- gion of the Andes adjoining Chile, mentary evidence Hitler got to Argen- he writes, “the surroundings and the tina in a German submarine, the U-530 Hitler residence were selected and that mysteriously surfaced outside the designed to have a distinct feel of Hit- harbor at Mar del Plata under the com- ler’s Obersalzberg retreat above the mand of Otto Wermuth and his execu- town of Berchtesgaden in the Bavarian tive officer, Karl Felix Schuller, after Alps. Hitler moved into the residence having spent weeks making surrepti- in June 1947.” tious drops of passengers along Argen- tina’s Atlantic shore. Hidden away in the National Ar- chives, Corsi found a U.S. naval intelligence report written July 18, 1945, by the Naval Attach in Buenos Aires who notified Washington there was reason to believe U-530 had landed Adolf Hitler and Eva Braun in the south of Argentina before the submarine jour- neyed on to surrender at Mar del Plata. Corsi had newspaper reports trans- lated of Hitler and Braun being wel- comed by wealthy Nazi sympathizers follow among Argentina’s large German community. The Germans there had conus on Wounded Warrior Project’s purpose is to raise awareness and enlist the structed a mansion hidden away in the public’s aid for the needs of injured service members; to help injured dense mountain forests of Bariloche servicemen and women aid and assist each other; and to provide unique, to provide the Nazi fhrer with comfort direct programs and services to meet their needs. Learn more or find out twitter how you can help at woundedwarriorproject.org. and security in his elder years. find our link at Corsi writes: In 1943, architect Ale- ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, © 2011 Wounded Warrior Project® All Rights Reserved jandro Bustillo, at the request of Ger- militarypress.com For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • [email protected] February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS 25 To place an ad or for more information, call MILITARY PRESS CLASSIFIEDS 858.537.2280

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LOVE who followed you around on your wed- CHARGERS line, cornerback, wide receiver and an- Cont’d. from Page 9 ding night. If he did a good job cap- Cont’d. from Page 16 other running back appear to top the turing the spirit of your love on your wish list this offseason. With question inextricable bound to how you feel, wedding night, then what he captured Stuckey, Ajirotutu was a standout per- marks surrounding cornerback Derrek and visa versa? will not only transport you in time; it former on special teams and with a Cox (contract), defensive end Dwight But how do you start the cycle? How will transform your heart. It will bring cap-friendly salary and good symmetry Freeney (quadriceps), center Nick do you get the pattern to begin? That a smile to your face and a tears to your with Philip Rivers, he should be re- Hardwick (concussion/neck), offensive brings us back to that pesty person eyes. signed. tackle King Dunlap (concussions), and Go get your wedding album. Get wide receivers Malcom Floyd (neck) your wedding video. Brush off the The Endzone and Denario Alexander (knees), the dust. Then plop down on the couch and The other free agent names in- Chargers’ front office have their work spend a few minutes reminiscing. The cludes Ronnie Brown (RB); Larry Eng- cut out for them. memories will be old. But the feelings lish (LB); Lavelle Hawkins (WR/KR); will be like new again. Richard Marshall (CB); Cam Thomas PIN DROP Mort Fertel is a world authority on (DT) and Charlie Whitehurst (QB). De- Cont’d. from Page 7 the psychology of relationships and has spite finishing the year 10-7 including explained, ‘’Well, when I came ashore an international reputation for saving the playoff victory over the Bengals, at Omaha Beach on D-Day in 1944 to marriages. In addition to working with there are a number of positions that help liberate this country, I couldn’t couples, he teaches individuals how to need to be upgraded for the Chargers find a single Frenchmen to show a single-handedly transform their marital to get into the playoffs this upcoming passport to.” situation. season. Defensive tackle, offensive You could have heard a pin drop. 26 February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS www.MilitaryPress.com • [email protected] Baby Boomers May Avoid Knee Surgery With Modern Arthritis Treatments Doctors say these two factors are the keys to knee arthritis treatment success and relieving pain without surgery By Matt Edgar sooner. And the earlier we can treat sufferers. This is similar to running America’s Health Writer knee arthritis - the better the results. your car low or without oil. Obviously, The key to avoiding knee replacement the sooner you put oil back in the car San Diego County - Everyone has surgery is doing the correct treatments - the less damage will be done. That’s said it at one time or another. If I had as soon as possible.” why some doctors feel early viscosup- only known about “this” sooner - things What is the plementation gets the best results and is would be very different today. “Correct Treatment?” so important for avoiding surgery. That’s what many knee arthritis pain “That depends, there is no one And the Doctors believe one of the sufferers are saying about this technol- answer when it comes to medical condi- most important factors for the success ogy and treatment. tions and knee arthritis is no different. of viscosupplementation is making sure “We all know that countless lives That’s why, if you have knee pain, you you are getting it into the joint space. Can This Be Avoided? Total knee replace- are being saved every year because of should have it evaluated by a doctor That’s why the doctors at Osteo Relief ment is serious surgery requiring months of early detection and better treatment of who deals with and treats knee pain Institute use advanced imaging technol- rehabilitation. Some doctors think modern cancer,” one of the physicians at Osteo every day,” stated the clinics director of ogy called a “C-Arm.” treatments done early enough can keep baby Relief Institute in San Diego, Califor- services. A C-Arm allows the doctor to see boomers from going under the knife. nia. “The same holds true for treating For many knee arthritis pain suf- into the joint and actually watch the in- knee arthritis pain. I believe we are ferers the right treatment is viscosup- jection go where it is supposed to. Re- “If you have knee arthritis pain, visco- having so much success at Osteo Relief plementation. In this treatment, a search shows that performing injections supplementation might be the answer you Institute because of two factors: One preparation of Hyaluronic acid (such without digital imaging can result in are looking for. The keys are to not wait, is we are using advanced medical tech- as Hyalgan) is injected directly into the missing the joint space as much as 30% get a good evaluation from an expert and nology and treatments a lot of clinics knee joint. of the time. If you had viscosupple- make sure advanced digital imaging (C- do not use. And second, the word has Hyaluronic acid is a natural lubri- mentation treatments without advanced Arm) is used to make sure you have the best spread to our community and so many cant and shock absorber for your joints imagining and did not get good results chance for success.” was the advice of the knee arthritis sufferers are coming in and is found to be decreased in arthritis - this may be why. doctors at the Osteo Relief Institute. Free Knee Pain Screenings Offered To Help Determine If San Diego Area Residents Qualify For Popular Treatment San Diego area knee pain sufferers have limited time to claim knee pain screening to see if all-natural knee arthritis treatment might work for them If you qualify for this treatment, it that big red thing on top of the rooster’s to 30% of the time.” said the head of might be one of the happiest days of head. It is extracted from the rooster’s Arthritis Treatment at Osteo Relief your life. comb, purified and concentrated. Institute. Advanced Medical Technology Can Make All That’s because, for the past year and When it is injected directly into your Osteo Relief Institute is a state of The Difference: This advanced digital imaging a half, hundreds of knee pain sufferers knee joint, it is like squirting oil on a the art medical facility offering only the called a C-arm allows doctors to see directly have flocked to Osteo Relief Institute rusty door hinge. best technology. into the knee joint so treatments are precise located in San Diego, California. Viscosupplementation allows your And that’s not all - Osteo Relief and the Hyalgan actually goes where it is supposed to. Studies show that injections done That’s when their specially trained joints to glide more smoothly eliminat- Institute has a complete knee relief without digital imaging can miss the joint up to doctors added viscosupplementation ing a lot of the rubbing, grinding and program called “P.A.C.E.” to make sure 30% of the time. This is one reason Hyalgan treatments to their already successful pain. you get the most pain relief and the best or other Viscosupplementation may not have and comprehensive knee pain relief Can Supplements Do possible results from treatment. worked for you. Osteo Relief Institute uses this program. The Same Thing? “Every case is individual. Some C-arm for every Hyalgan treatment. Viscosupplementation is unique No. Glucosamine and chondroi- patients get quite a bit of relief right because - even though it is manufac- tin and other supplements are much away - others take a little more time. tured by a pharmaceutical company, it different. You can only get this from But most have been extremely happy limited amount of new patients each month is NOT considered a drug because it is a doctor and it often helps knee pain and the results usually last for at least for this screening - so if you are interested a natural substance with an incredible sufferers who got limited or no success 6 months. Patients who were suffering please call now. Your risk free screening story. from glucosamine and chondroitin. Be- for years with bad knee pain are getting will only take about 25-30 minutes... you Why So Many Want It ware of unsubstantiated claims made by their lives back... going for walks again will get all your questions answered and You see, when you suffer with supplements that claim to do what this and exercising. It’s amazing to see. leave knowing if you have possibly found arthritis - the lubricating fluid (synovial advanced medical procedure does. They tell all their friends - that’s why the solution to your knee pain. fluid) in your knee joint dries up. Why You Should Try This we are swarmed. I can’t tell you how And here’s something really important This means instead of gliding Even If You’ve Already many patients have cancelled their total - Viscosupplementation treatments and smoothly - your bones start to rub and Had Similar Treatments knee replacement surgeries.” added one the P.A.C.E program are covered by most grind against each other. Without results... doctor. insurance and Medicare. To schedule your This causes a little pain in the begin- “We have been able to help so many How To Get It screening today call 619-377-4456. ning - but over time the pain steadily knee pain sufferers - even many who If you have knee pain, the doctors gets worse until it is excruciating. have already tried other injections would like to invite you for a risk free If You Can Answer Yes - You Like “Joint Oil” like Synvisc, Supartz, Orthovisc and screening to see if you are a candidate Viscosupplementation works so even Hyalgan. We use special and for viscosupplementation treatments Are Eligible For A Knee Arthri- well because it is like “joint oil.” It is very advanced low-dose videofluoros- and the P.A.C.E program. tis Screening With The Experts a natural substance that contains one of copy imaging called “Hologic Digital All you have to do is call 619-377- At Osteo Relief Institute the natural building blocks of the syno- Imaging” so we can see right into the 4456 right now and when the schedul- vial fluid that lubricates your knee. joint. This allows us to put the Hyaglan ing specialist answers the phone tell her Scientists and researchers discov- exactly where it needs to be. Studies you would like your risk free “Knee Do you have pain and osteoarthritis ered this natural building block to show doctors doing joint injections Pain Screening.” The specialists at (arthritis) of the knee? synovial fluid in the rooster’s comb - without fluoroscopy miss the joint up Osteo Relief Institute can only accept a Have you tried other treatments such as NSAIDS and other anti- inflammatory medications without success? Have you already tried viscosupplementation (Hyalgan, Suparz, Synvisc) without satisfactory results?

If you answered yes to any of these questions - give Osteo Relief Institute a call and schedule your risk free knee Everyone Wants Proof: In Pain - the red is a knee Successful Treatment Failed Treatment - the in- pain screening 619-377-4456 the artist simulated draw- joint with painful osteo- - Viscosupplementation jection (and cushioning and ings above, picture #1 is arthritis. Arthritis causes (blue) being precisely in- lubricating material) misses a normal, pain-free knee. the joint space to de- jected directly into the knee the joint space. Research There is no arthritis and the crease, grinding, stiffness, joint using Hologic digital shows this occurs up to 30% knee can move and bend decreased motion, bone imaging. Advanced imag- of the time without the use freely without pain. spurs, swelling and a lot of ing allows treatments to be of Hologic digital imaging to pain. as precise as possible. This guide the injection. This is cushioning can lubricate the why other treatments may Non-Surgical Spine Pain, Neuropathy, joint and decrease pain. not have worked for you. And Joint Arthritis Treatment For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • [email protected] February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS 27 28 February 1, 2014 THE MILITARY PRESS www.MilitaryPress.com • [email protected]