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Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy Couple Relationships by Protective Reactions Such As Numbing Due to the Triggering of Attachment- Stephanie A

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Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy Couple Relationships by Protective Reactions Such As Numbing Due to the Triggering of Attachment- Stephanie A E Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy couple relationships by protective reactions such as numbing due to the triggering of attachment- Stephanie A. Wiebe1 and Sue M. Johnson2 related fears. In EFT, couples are encouraged to 1International Centre for Excellence in explore core primary attachment-related emotions Emotionally Focused Therapy, Ottawa, ON, and needs as they arise in the therapy session and Canada express these to their partner. Partners are then 2The University of Ottawa, Ottawa, ON, Canada encouraged to tune into their partners’ emotions and needs and respond. As partners tune into one another’s now clarified and explicit emotional Name of the Strategy realities, they are able to counter one another’s attachment fears, establish emotional connection, Emotionally focused couple therapy. and create a more secure bond. Since its develop- ment in the 1980–1990s, EFT has accumulated a strong evidence base and is practiced by couple Synonyms therapists internationally. EFT; Emotionally focused therapy Prominent Associated Figures Introduction Sue Johnson developed EFT as she strove to understand and capture the complexity and inten- Emotionally focused couple therapy (EFT) is an sity of her couples’ experiences in therapy, along- approach to couple therapy that helps create side Les Greenberg. In the first study of EFT, attachment security in relationships by guiding Johnson and Greenberg (1985a) discovered that partners to explore and share with one another focusing explicitly on and regulating emotions in their core attachment-related emotions and couple therapy sessions was beneficial in alleviat- needs. EFT conceptualizes the negative interac- ing relationship distress, and in fact superior to a tion patterns between partners in distressed couple cognitive-behavioral problem-solving approach. relationships and the associated strong negative Sue Johnson and colleagues have further devel- emotions as arising from emotional disconnection oped the model to include a primary emphasis on and an insecure attachment bond. Core, primary attachment. Emotionally focused couple therapy attachment-related emotions are often blocked developed by Johnson (2004) differs significantly from awareness and expression in distressed from emotion focused therapy for couples # Springer International Publishing AG 2018 J.L. Lebow et al. (eds.), Encyclopedia of Couple and Family Therapy, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-15877-8_193-1 2 Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFT-C; developed more recently by Greenberg emotional responses (Johnson 2004). As both and Goldman 2008) in that it places emphasis on partners engage in this process of intrapsychic the attachment relationship and views emotions exploration coupled with the direct expression of that arise in the relationship as related to the here- attachment-related emotions and needs in the rela- and-now attachment interactions between part- tionship, this interrupts the demand/withdraw pat- ners. Greenberg and Goldman (2008), in contrast, tern seen in distressed relationships and allows also place strong emphasis on identity, power, and couples to create new patterns of mutual respon- individual emotional exploration and regulation. siveness and deeper levels of engagement (Johnson 2004). Secure bonding potentiates effec- tive caretaking and satisfying sexual connection. Theoretical Framework EFT draws on humanistic and systemic principles Populations in Focus within an attachment-based framework (Johnson 2004). In EFT, the negative, rigid interaction pat- Since attachment and associated emotions are terns and strong negative affect and lack of posi- universal in nature, a therapy that helps couples tive affect – noted by Gottman (1993)tobea create more secure attachment, such as EFT, is a central feature of distressed relationships – are viable approach across diverse populations of seen as constantly triggered attachment insecurity adult couples (Zuccarini and Karos 2011; Liu and a felt sense of isolation. Distressed relation- and Wittenborn 2011). Liu and Wittenborn ships are typically characterized by a demand/ (2011) outline three principles for working with withdraw pattern of interaction in which one part- culturally diverse couples in EFT: (1) give atten- ner pursues with criticisms and/or demands and tion to meanings and functions associated with the other partner withdraws (Gottman 1993). The emotional expression and attachment behaviors; emotions that arise when the attachment system is (2) seek understanding of the socially constructed activated in couple relationships map onto meanings of emotion; and (3) use words and met- demand/withdraw pattern such that the pursuing aphors to which clients can relate, especially cli- partner typically expresses intense distress and ents’ own words, and explore further to ascertain anger characterized by blame, criticism, and con- their intended meaning. As the meanings under- tempt and hyperactivates attachment signals to lying attachment behaviors are investigated in protest the distance in the relationship. The with- session, core attachment-related emotions and drawing partner downregulates affects and with- needs become apparent and are then open to draws emotionally, consistent with deactivating exploration in a way that can be understood by strategies of affect regulation observed with both partners. By remaining receptive to universal attachment avoidance. Secure attachment rela- attachment emotions, meanings, and functions tionships, in contrast, involve mutual emotional underlying behaviors – rather than taking responsiveness, accessibility, and engagement responses at face value – therapists can adapt (Johnson 2004). EFT for diverse populations of couples In the EFT model, the intrapsychic focus of (Greenman et al. 2009). experiential approaches is combined with the In terms of clinical presentations, EFT is par- interpersonal perspective of systems theory to ticularly relevant for couples with medical ill- slow down negative cycles of interaction, as well nesses, depression, and posttraumatic stress. as increase emotional accessibility and respon- With the focus of EFT on building secure connec- siveness in the relationship. Change is thought to tion, effective affect regulation, and creating sup- occur through the creation of moments of secure portive interactions with loved ones, it is not bonding as couples increasingly explore and surprising that EFT has been found to be effective express underlying attachment needs and the vul- for these populations (Wiebe and Johnson 2016). nerabilities that underlie secondary protective EFT has also been tailored and tested for use with Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy 3 couples dealing with attachment injuries such as to be responded to, and become more responsive affairs and other betrayals (Zuccarini et al. 2013). and engaged. In turn, partners who previously Contraindications to EFT involve situations in were blaming and critical begin to clearly express which it would not be safe for partners to become their attachment needs for comfort and reassur- emotionally vulnerable with one another through ance in a way that invites the other partner to the exploration and expression of core understand and respond. As the withdrawing part- attachment-related emotions and needs. Unsafe ner reengages, and as the blaming partner softens situations may include physical violence, sub- into vulnerable sharing, new positive interactional stance abuse, or ongoing infidelity. responses are shaped in bonding moments. There are two key change events that are understood to occur in stage two of EFT: Withdrawer Strategies and Techniques Used in reengagement and blamer-softening. Withdrawer Model reengagement occurs when the partner who pre- viously avoided open engagement with their part- EFT draws on experiential and systemic interven- ner can express their attachment needs clearly and tions including empathic reflection of emotions directly, and becomes more responsive to their and interactive patterns, validation, evocative partner. Blamer-softening occurs when the partner responding and questioning, heightening emo- who previously took a pursing stance in the rela- tional engagement, empathic conjecture, and tionship, approaching their partner with blame reframing and restructuring interactions within a and criticism, begins to express their more vulner- process of three stages, as outlined by Johnson able primary emotions (hurt, sadness, fear, or (2004). Stage 1 is cycle de-escalation. In this shame) in a soft but clear and direct way. Their stage, EFT therapists help couples develop an partner is then encouraged to listen and respond in understanding of their negative dance and the an emotionally attuned way. These events gener- distance it creates as the source of distress in ate new, more constructive, cycles of contact and their relationship. In this stage, therapists track caring, fostering secure attachment. and reflect how this pattern of interaction takes Stage 3 is consolidation. This stage involves over the relationship and clarify each partner’s integration of gains made during therapy into core attachment fears, secondary emotions such specific situations of conflict. During this stage, as chronic anger, and behavioral reactions, such as couples use their felt sense of more secure con- turning against or away from the other and how nection and increased trust to solve problems in these impact each partner. The completion of their relationship and everyday lives, creating a stage one
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