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FEBRUARY 1998 THE FULL MOON Page 10 Moonshine Editor: Wilson Beaver m Wacko and Jacko Meet King Cupid! W€W AM) IJWA PARTIES 4 LIFK! by Wilson Beaver by Wilson Beaver As the story left off last month. Wacko and quest ofthe blind King Cupid. "If the King Cu­ On Monday nights when the sun goes down and the moon shines bright, the boys ot the UWA Jacko had fallen through a bottomless pit. As pid is pleased by the end of the twenty-four time (Ugly Wrestlers of'Albemarle) gather for the weekly battles of PVCIV Monday Night Nitro. The they were falling, a bright light appeared below period, then you will be able to stay in the king­ UWA is composed of past and present Albemarle students who side with either the WCW wrestlers them. The light was growing bigger and brighter dom of Cupid. The two of you will enjoy the or the NWO wrestlers. The supporting students of the WCW include Mark "Diamond Dallas” as the helpless duo was falling. fruits of the land or return to your world to re­ Purvis, Justin “Goldberg” Kimrey, Bill "The Living Legend Zbysco" Timberlake, Scott “Melinko" The mysterious red man’s voice echoed main with each forever. If you fail in pleasing Brinson, and Travis “the Giant” Smith. Ben “Bagwell" Smith, Brian Smith and Jonathan Perry around the abyss as Wacko and Jacko fell into the king, then both of you will perish in the dun­ (“Steiner Brothers"), William “Inferno” Yeskie, Michael "Hollywood” Lowder, Brooke "Hall” Laton, the bright light. Suddenly, they hit the ground geon of Dionyc, ruler of the underside world. David “Nash” Byrd, and new member Wilson “Bischoff’ Beaver support the New World Order with the force of meteors. Afkr recovering from There you will be separated forever and live out (NWO). Amber Perry, Brooke Laton, Amy Whitley, Ashley Flake, and Sobrina Driver make up the the fall and checking on Jacko’s status. Wacko your days mining platutonium for King Cupid. cheerleaders of the WCW known as the “Nitro Girls”. noticed the only other visible object in the bright You have my blessings and wishes for the best When the big show begins, members of the UWA get ready to RUMBLE!! The boys rip off their room was a large black door with a combination of luck.” shirts and prepare for their own scheduled matches. During the preliminary matches, the UWA eats lock. The red man’s voice echoed the combina­ Wacko and Jacko walked over to the door, munchies, taunts each other’s group, and wrestles. Once the last match, The Main Event, starts, all tion around Wacko and Jacko. The voice told dialed the combination, and entered the room on eyes are on the tube watching crime bosses such as Sting, “Hollywood” Hogan, The Giant, Kevin Wacko and Jacko to enter and fulfill the one re- the other side. The room was elaborately deco­ Nash, Diamond Dallas Page (DDP), and Scott Hall beat the heck out of each other. Frustration and rated with medieval banners and armor suits. At suspense fills the room as the UWA members watch their icons in action. When the show is over, one end of the room was the throne of King Cu­ the members of the UWA plan for next week’s party. pid, where he was sitting. The king summoned I bet you’re wondering how this series of mayhem parties started? At the very beginning, Mark the two guests to approach and kneel before him Purvis was surfing through the channels and stopped when he saw this woman know as Kimberly, for proper Cupidian introductions. Jacko ob­ DDP’s wife, dancing around the ring. Instantly. Mark got hooked and told Justin Kimrey about the served that the blind king was merely a large child show. The first wrestling party was then scheduled for a pay-per-view special called WCW Hallow­ of five dressed in red. Wacko asked the King, een Havoc. From then on, the UWA always meet on Monday nights or when there is a pay-per-view "What shall my lady and I do to please your majesty?” The King replied, " Read me stories special. To see what this new hysteria is all about, I decided to go to a Nitro party. While 1 was there, 1 until 1 can no longer hold open my eyes.” Then heard many different stories about previous parties. F or example during the December pay-per- servants of the king came in with carts full of view special. World War III, UWA members’ anger got so out of control that a massive riot broke out bedtime stories. at Justin Kimrey’s house after Ben Smith insulted Bill Timberlake’s idol, Ric Flair. An interesting Wacko and Jacko took turns reading to the fact is that the UWA gave me was that Monday Night Nitro had a higher television rating than king for ten hours until they could no longer read Monday Night FootballJor three weeks in a row. I also heard a lot of comments passed back and another word. But King Cupid was still wide­ forth between the WCW and NWO supporters. “NWO is for losers". Bill exclaimed. Ben Smith awake. The two babysitters tried to persuade the retaliated and said, “Sting’s a pure wimp. I le hides in the rafters and waits to come down at the end king to allow them to take an hour break to rest of Nitro. But the NWO is man enough to standby to acknowledge the WCW because they’re just and eat. The king refused their request and de­ Too Sweet!!” When asking Ben Smith about the NWO’s success, he said, “It’s down here!” I asked manded that they continue reading until he fell other UWA members about their thoughts on Monday Night Nitro^ Mark Purvis said, "Wrestling asleep. Wacko and Jacko then began to plot a brings out the man in all of us; there’s nothing like getting together, flexing muscles, and telling plan to drug the king to sleep. Next month, find lies.” "I love Kimberly, but the Nitro girls are the best part of wrestling", commented Justin Kimrey. Wacko and Jacko plan to escape while out the plan to drug the king and see if Wacko Scott Brinson s a y s , "Credit goes to the members ofthe NWO for making wrestling famous.” At the reading a story to King Cupid. and Jacko escape the reign of King Cupid. end ofthe party, the members inducted me into the UWA and gave me the nickname Bischoff The nickname comes from Eric Bischoff, the agent and manager of the NWO. Ben Smith and Mark I DREAMING OF ; Purvis help in teaching me the ways ofthe UWA and the WCW. The UWA is full of spunk and enthusiasm when watching WCW wrestling. They seem to have become much closer friends since these parties have started. I CHOCOLATE CRAVINGS ! The wrestling cra/e does not end with just a television show; the WCW has video games for by Stephanie Efird Sony Play Station and Nintendo 64. I have personally viewed the Nintendo 64 game named "WCW Ever had a chocolate craving? Chocolate chocolate Vs. NWO". The graphics are astounding and the action is so realistic. When playing the game you gives you a feeling of deluxe joy to your taste • Keyma Clark-Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups feel like you are actually wrestling the famous wrestlers of WCW. I recommend the game one buddies. Chocolate contains something close to • Mrs. Brinson-Russell Stover hundred perccnt. caffeine, giving you lots of energy. Nothing can • Karen Cauble-fudge Wrestling is a sport that is solely for people who like watching big hairy men pushing and beating cheer a person up more than chomping on some • Cindy White-all kinds each other up. Everyone should watch at least one match in his or her lifetime to fully understand chocolate. In one ounce of chocolate there are • Mrs. Powell-Turtles what professional wrestling is all about. 145 calories and 9 grams of fat. Despite this • Mrs. Morgan-CJodivia fact, the average American throws down 15 lbs, • Ben Lisk-Zagnut of chocolate every year, and in Switzerland, the • Stephanie Holt-Almond Kissex'straw berries average per.son eats 22lbs. a year. Whether it’s dipped in chocolate brownies, cakes, candies, cheesecakes, cookies, • Mr. I'ike-world class chocolate icc cream fudge, ice cream, mouse, souffics. or truffles, ev­ (Baskin and Robbin's) eryone loves chocolate. Take a peek. • Danielle I ledrick-Mo/art chocolate candies • Mandi Hathcock-Skor • Jason Pinion-Peanut Clusters • TilTany I'udy-Snickers • Kristen lk)wers-N'utrageous • Jodie Dennis-white chocolate • Lidnsey Trick-Snickers • I'J Coley-Kisses • Sobrina Dri\er-(icnnan Chocolate • Chris 1 larwood-Chocolate Chip cookies • Micheal Burris-brownies • Charlene (Jaddy-llershey Chocolate is treasured more than an> other • Scott Brinson-Chocolate covered almonds type of grub. I'here are lots of chocolate comp-'" • Shannon Ellrd-Kussell Stover/Cadbury nies from Godivia to Cadbury. but the biggest Cream eggs chocolate plant is in Mershcj . PA.(Bet youcan ' • Amber Perry- Godivia guesswhat brand of chocolatc the> make.) It • Brooke l,aton-l lershey’s Kis.ses lakes 72 hours to make chtKoIaic. due to all ol • Brandon Cooke- Nestle’s semi-sweet the stirring. So w ith one of ch(Kolate’s biggi-’s' • Will Joines-M&M’s da) s (Valentine’s Da>! coming up. don’t I'orgi-'l • Ben Smith-Cioobers to gctyour honeybunch some ofthe world's Members of the UWA show off their strength and talent at a recent Nitro party.

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