Bat Mitzvah Program- Beth Israel 2005

בס"ד שֵם; ______

ָ תּ ִ אַריך הָבַּת-מִצְוָוה;______

The Bat-

Mitzva

Files

Beth Israel Synagogue Tevet of 5765

The Bat Mitzva files 1 © Tali & Yehoshua Grunstein בס"ד

1. Introduction - Who am I? 2. Mah Nishtaneh –what is different about being 12 3. Women and the Mitzvot a. positive and negative b. positive time bound c. the reason for exemption d. positive time bound and obligated e. if exempt – may we do them and bless? f. Special "women"s mitzvoth

4. My home 5. Learning Torah for Women 6. Women and Davening 7. Special Middos of Women A. Chesed B. Tznuit – Modesty – beyond the way we dress 8. "Bizchut Nashim Tzdkaniout" – Jewish Women and the History of the Jewish People 9. Woman of Valor 10. The Personal Report

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Dear Bat Mitzvah, Welcome to the Bat Mitzvah Files. Before we begin our journey we want to congratulate on your entering adult Jewish society. For 12 years we have waited for this moment – the moment you join us. For 12 years your family has given much to you; • They were happy to hear your first cry, • They gave you a helping hand when you took your first steps, • They looked on beaming as they brought you for your first day at school • & they where overjoyed at your progress. Since then your family has walked with you every step of the way – advancing from class to class – stage to stage. But not only has your family glanced on at these marvelous advancements you have achieved – many generations of Jewish women have watched and waited for this moment when you become another link on the long chain of Jewish women, who have continued & were responsible for the continuation of our cherished heritage. Now it’s your turn- May you be blessed with success!

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Dear Journal 1. Which part of the above introduction interested you most- The greetings, the congratulations, the part of being a new link on a long chain? ______. 2. The introduction mentioned several important milestones in your life. Can you think of some others that you have had in the past 12 years? ______. 3. Below are some other important events that may have happened to you. Tell us about one of them: a. the first book I ever read; ______. b. the first time I told the Parsha at the Shabbat table; ______. c. my first friend; ______. d. I knew, but I didn’t tattletale; ______. e. I was offended, but I didn’t hurt another's feelings; ______. 4. “Everyone has a name” – The Midrash says everyone has three names: one his parents gave to him, one that people call him and one that he gave to himself. Where is your name from (the bible, named after a relative, etc)? What is your nickname – is it the same as the one your parents gave you? ______5. When you go home, take a good look in the mirror and answer the following: a. what are your facial features like; ______b. how do you dress (your style, the way you dress on different occasions, etc) ______. c. how do you speak – noisily, softly, politely, quietly, fast, slow, etc? ______d. what are your favorite hobbies; ______e. what are your traits? Funny, excited, soft, silly etc?; ______.

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Dear Bat Mitzvah,

Now that we have become acquainted, I would like to tell about the objective of our Bat Mitzvah Files. These files are a journey – an odyssey of exploring who we are and where we are going and of course to try and understand what this whole Bat Mitzvah thing is all about. So sit back, buckle up your seatbelt and enjoy the ride!

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Dear Bat Mitzvah,

What is different you ask? What makes becoming 12 so different than before? You say you did Mitzvot before – you davened, you made berachot, you honored your Parents etc’. So what has changed?

The Rambam (Maimonides) states the following: a child)… and) טָקְ נָה The girl from the day she is born until she is 12 yrs of age is considered a" "..(a young woman) נְ הרָעָ from 12yrs and one day she is called a adults) in) גְדוֹלִ ים a girl of 12yrs.and one day and a boy of 13 yrs. and one day are considered" regard to Mitzvot". Dear Journal 1. According to the Rambam, what do you call a girl who is less than 12? ______. 2. According to the Rambam, what do you call a girl who is older than 12? (2) ______.

;literally to shake off] which means 2 things] נְ הרָעָ A young woman is called a .3 a. I am not a young girl anymore but rather I have shaken off childhood and I am not going to do childish things anymore but rather I am a young woman. b. I am now a young woman and not a child. My parents have shaken off all their responsibility for my actions. Until now, my parents have shouldered the responsibility for my sins. Now, I alone am responsible for my actions. ?appeals most to you נְ הרָעָ Which explanation for the word

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______. Dear Bat Mitzvah,

Yes. You did indeed do Mitzvot before you where 12. Your parents and teachers have taught you to do Mitzvot so that you will be familiar with them, before you are obligated in fulfilling them. What has changed? A whole lot. From this day forward you are obligated in the Mitzvot. Until now you kept the Mitzvot without having been commanded to keep them. From today you are commanded and obligated in keeping the Torah. You are now in the !Fulfilling as commanded – " וֶצֻמְ וה וְעוֹ השֶ " category of the

Dear Journal

What is better – to not be commanded, and still keep the Mitzvot from my own free will or to be told that I must keep the Torah and do it? Or maybe since it is hard to do – keeping the Torah because I am commanded is better than just doing it from my own free will? Write your opinion and then we’ll discuss it. ______.

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Dear Bat Mitzvah,

The Talmud states the following:

"The one who is commanded and fulfills is greater than the one is not commanded and fulfills".

The Commentator Tosfot explains:

"The reward of the one who is commanded and fulfills is greater… as he/she is commanded and he/she accepts the yoke of the Mitzvot placed upon him".

What do you think? ______.

Dear Bat Mitzvah

The Rambam states the following: adults) in) גְדוֹלִ ים a girl of 12yrs.and one day and a boy of 13 yrs. and one day are considered" regard to Mitzvot" The Halacha [Jewish Law] sees you, a 12 yr., as a mature young woman. The Halacha trusts you already at age 12. You accept upon yourself the yoke of Mitzvot earlier than a boy. You are twelve and already a Bat Mitzvah. Why? Let us examine the following Midrash:

"'and Hashem built the Women from the rib' (Bereshit 2:22), R' Eliezer in the name of R' Yossi ( ָבִינה) ben Zimra said: Hashem gave a woman an extra intellect

more than that of the man" (Beresheit Rabba) and R' Asher states:

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" and Hashem gave a woman more intellect than that of the man: meaning that the womans intellect is earlier than the mans". When the Midrash uses the word "intellect" does that mean the women are smarter or does it mean something else? Read the following and decide:

"Mrs. Nevo had twins: a boy, Moshe, and a girl, Merav. Moshe was born first, he beat his sister by 12 minutes. But for Mrs. Nevo – Moshe is still the younger one. Why you ask. Mrs. Nevo says that whenever she has a job to do she'll give it to Merav since she is more responsible, more serious, she understands things in a much more mature manner than her brother. Then she adds, don’t think that Moshe isn’t smart. He is a bright boy, he just isn’t ready yet. It will be a little while longer before he is as responsible as his sister….".

What do you think?

______

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Dear Bat Mitzvah, In the last chapter we learned " a girl of 12yrs.and one day is considered an adult in regard to mitzvoth" (Maimonides). Does this mean that a Bat Mitzvah must keep from this day forward all 613 Mitzvot? In order to understand what Mitzvot a young woman is obligated in, we must understand the 2 categories of Mitzvot in the Torah; Positive Commandments – Mitzvot that the Torah ;מ ְ ִצוֹות עָשֵה (1 commands you to do an action – such as giving Tzedaka, Blowing the Shofar, etc’. Negative Commandments – Mitzvot that the ;מ ְ ִצוֹות לֹא תָּעָשֵה (2 Torah relates to in the Negative – what not to do/what to refrain from – such as not speaking slander called Lashon Harah, and not to eat non-kosher food. Women and Men are both commanded in all the Negative Commandments. Both are commanded in "do not murder", "do not steal" etc’. However, Women are not obligated in all the positive commandments; A. Positive Commandments thatare not limited/constricted to a certain time-frame, date, hour etc’. Rather they are either every day or once a lifetime, such as: Honoring your Parents and putting up a Mezuza. These Mitzvot Women must Fulfill, the same as men.

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The –מ ְ ִצוֹות עָשֵה שְ הָ זְמַ ןמַרָן גְ - B. Time Bound Positive Commandments positive commandments have a certain time in which they are to be fulfilled. For instance – Tefillin and Tzitzit – they are worn only during the day and not at night, a Sukka – it’s a Mitzva to live in the Sukka only for the days of the Succot holiday not on other days. Women are exempt from Keeping them!

Dear Journal Categorize the following Mitzvot according to the chart below; • Washing Hands for Bread • Hashavat Avaida (Returning Lost Items) • Berachot on Food • Tzitzit, • Mixing meat and milk • The Four “Minim” on Sukkot, • do not bear false witness" • Tefillin Positive Commandment Negative Commandment Time - Bound Non-Time Bound

- In Vayikra ch. 19 (Parshat Kedoshim) is a long list of Mitzvot – add 5-6 of them in your chart.

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Dear Bat Mitzvah,

Though it seems from your chart that women are exempt from many Mitzvot, in truth, they are only a fraction of the 613 Mitzvot in the Torah and the many Rabbinic laws we observe. As R' Saadya Gaon stated:

"There are 30 Mitzvot which Women are exempt from and Men are obligated in".

But why did Hashem exempt Women from these Mitzvot? We don’t know Hashem's reasons, but we can try and understand, though his infinite wisdom may differ from our human intellect. Below are a few reasons suggested by the Rabbis:

1. Higher level of spirituality- Mitzvot are a tool to serve Hashem. The Torah sees that women have a heightened sense of spirituality and a greater love and excitement for serving Hashem. Since Women have this "built in" ability to reach spiritual heights and serve Hashem, they don't need as many "external" tools, Mitzvot, as men need to serve Hashem.

2. Different roles- Women have different roles in life as a mother to her children and homemaker. Since Mitzvot that are bound by a certain time can clash with her other tasks, Hashem exempted her from these Mitzvot. What do you think of these suggested explanations? Which one appeals to you more? Do think Women are on a higher spiritual level than men? ______.

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Dear Bat Mitzvah, מ ְ ִצוֹות עָשֵה שְ הָ זְמַ ןמַרָן גְ from (פְּ רוֹטוּ ת) Above we stated that Women are exempt – Time – Bound Positive Mitzvot. Though this was codified in the manner of a rule, it in essence is more of a common denominator, as there are many exceptions to this rule (many Time-bound positive mitzvahs that women keep). The exceptions can be classified into four groups:

1. The Torah explicitly obligated Women; For example read: a. Devarim 16:14 b. Devarim 31:12. These mitzvot are:______

2.Time–bounded yet tied in with a Negative Commandment- As women are obligated in the Negative commandments, women are obligated in these kind of positive ones. For instance: The Prohibitions of Shabbat – women are obligated in them. But what about making Kiddush on Shabbat (a positive one that is only done on Shabbat – time bound – part of the verse "Remember the day of Shabbat")? The Rabbis explained this with an analogy (a connection and comparison): "'Remember' and 'Keep' – all those that are obligated in Keeping are obligated in Remembering. Since Women are obligated in the "Keep" Mitzvot (the prohibitions of Shabbat – the 39 Prohibited acts), they are obligated in the "Remember" Mitzvot (the positive acts of Shabbat – like Kiddush, 3 meals etc)".

From this analogy we learn that Women are also obligated in the "positive" aspects of Shabbat, just like Men. In a similar fashion the Rabbis learned the women are also commanded in eating Matza on Pesach (though that too is a time – bound mitzvah that we fulfill only on the Seder nights). Since the eating of Matza on Pesach is connected to the prohibition against eating Chametz ("you shall not eat leavened bread with it, for seven days you shall

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eat Matza" – Devarim 16:3), and as women are obligated in the prohibition of eating chametz on Pesach, they are obligated in the Positive part as well – the obligation to eat Matza.

3. Time – Bound that commemorate salvation- Commandments that commemorate our Nation being saved and redeemed and in which women had a part in the salvation or were part of the persecution that preceded the Redemption – "since they were also part of the Miracle". This reasoning is behind the obligation of Women to drink the 4 cups of wine at the Seder and to tell the Story of the Exodus from Egypt. The same reasoning is behind the mitzvot of the Holidays of Purim and Chanukah. Can you tell us what the female participation in these miracles was?______4. Volunteered- Certain Time-bound Mitzvot women over the ages accepted upon themselves and thus obligated themselves in these Mitzvot. For instance: Hearing the Blowing of the Shofar on Rosh Hashanah.

Dear Journal The Abudraham states that "There are 7 Time bound positive commandments that women are obligated in and they are: being happy on the holidays, Hakhel, Kiddush on Shabbat, Eating Matza on the Seder nights, Reading the Megillah on Purim, Lighting Chanuka Candles and the 4 Cups of Wine on Pesach". Divide the Abudrahams statement according to the 4 groups; The Torah Time–bounded yet Time – Bound that Volunteered explicitly tied in with a commemorate savior obligated us Negative Commandment

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Dear Bat Mitzvah,

Though women may be exempt from certain time – bound positive commandments, are they allowed to fulfill them? The majority of the Rabbis say that you may. One problem exists, though. ....וצוונו"אשר קדשנו במצוותיו When we do a mitzvah we make a beracha and say means commanded – but these mitzvot Hashem exempted "צוונו" The word women so how can we say the words "and he commanded"? The Rabbis differ on this question some say they should still make the beracha, even though they weren’t commanded, and others say not to.

We will finish this section with the words of the Tziz Eliezer: "Praised be the daughters of Israel… that run after the Mitzvot to obligate themselves in their fulfillment and they bless Hashem by doing so….".

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Dear Bat Mitzvah, Up until now we have discussed the Mitzvot that women are exempt from and those that they are obligated to fulfill. There is one more category of Mitzvot that we must examine: Mitzvot that were give specially to Women. These are: 1. The Shabbat Candles: the lighting of the Shabbat candles are meant to bring Peace and Tranquility into the home. Hashem gave women the merit of being the first one in the home to fulfill this very special task. 2. Taking Challah from the Dough – During the Time of the Beit Hamikdash a part of any dough that was made was portioned off for the Cohen – this is the Mitzva of taking Challah. It is one of the Special Mitzvot done in the land of Israel and it is special since it’s the only one that we fulfill also outside the land of Israel. 3. Immersion in a Mikva – Ritual Bath

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Dear Journal,

What is a "home"? Is it 4 walls and a roof, meant for living? Is a hut, a tent a home? What makes a house a home? Is a home a family? Is it love an warmth but also a punishment and reprimand? What is a home? Tell us your thoughts. ______.

Dear Bat Mitzvah,

The Midrash tells us about the home of Avraham and Sarah, especially the tent of Sarah. Our Mother Rifka's tent had the same characteristics:

"All of the days of Sarah's life there was a cloud above the opening of her ten. When she died, it stopped. When Rifka came, the cloud came back All of the days of Sarah's life the doors of her tent were open. When she died, they closed. When Rifka came, they opened again. All of the days of Sarah's life there was a blessing in the dough in her bowl. When she died, this blessing stopped. When Rifka came, it returned. All of the days of Sarah's life there was a light lit from one Shabbat eve to the next. When she died, it stopped. When Rifka came, it returned". Dear Journal What do these 4 special blessings represent? What do you think? ______.

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Dear Bat Mitzvah,

One of the commentaries explains that each of the 4 blessings stand for 4 good traits in a woman:

1. Intelligence – our Mothers were blessed with special level of intelligence (they prophetesses) and merited having the cloud of Hashem by their tent.

2. Open Heart – and therefore their doors where always open to visitors.

3. "She looks after the conduct of her household" – and for that there was a blessing in her dough.

4. Calm and Peace loving – and that is why the light was always lit – since the light represents peace and tranquility.

Dear Bat Mitzvah,

The family is the center of the home. Parents and Children. Parenting is a job and a mission. But is it easy? Part of the job description includes: love, caring, understanding and devotion. But between the love and devotion there sometimes are moments that we are not satisfied, like: my parents didn't give me what I wanted…, they didn't let me go…, they demanded of me….

Though it may be tough for us the Torah commands us to Honor our parents, on one hand, and to Fear them, on the other hand. Open up your Kitzur Shulchan Aruch, sec. 143 and read paragraphs 1-8.

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Dear Journal,

My mom got mad at me for hitting a friend. Can I scream back? Mom told me to go clean my room. As I was climbing the stairs, Dad asked me to walk the dog. Whose wishes should I listen to? What to do?

Tell us your thoughts according to the above. ______.

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Dear Bat Mitzvah,

"Teach them thoroughly to your children and speak of them while you sit in your home a, while you walk on the way, when you sleep and when you wake up" (the Shema – Devarim 6:7)

These Verses are the source for the Mitzvah of learning Torah and teaching it to ones sons. But what about the daughters/ girls? Firstly- They are not obligated. However, the Rambam states that a woman who learns Torah has a reward, and for generations, Jewish women have learned the Torah and its Laws. Regarding the Mitzvah of Hakhel, the gathering of the entire Jewish people in the courtyard of the Temple on the Sukkot following the Shemita year (the seventh year), when the King would read from the Torah the book of Devarim, the Torah explicitly states that Women must attend this gathering. In the book of Bamidbar we read the story of the daughters of Tzelafchad, who came to Moshe and demanded a portion in the land of Israel. The Talmud states that

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these women were "smart and learned" and they merited having Hashem agree with their position. In the Times of the Mishna, we read about Bruria, the daughter of R' Chanina ben Terdyon, who the Gemara says learned three Halachas every day. The Gemara also quotes the questions of Yalta, the wife of R' Nachman, who was a very learned woman. During medieval times, the daughters of the commentator Rashi were also considered very learned women.

Like Jewish women in the past, Jewish girls and women today delve into Torah learning – the Written and the Oral Torah, strengthening their bond with our eternal Torah and better preparing themselves for the challenges surrounding them. But we are not obligated?

Rather, we are not obligated in the actual Mitzva of learning. But is it possible that we will connect to G-d with our hearts and not our minds? Should our minds not be devoted to Jewish values are well? In this aspect, Women are defnilty obligated! What do you think? Should we just not volunteer in this one too? ______.

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Dear Bat Mitzvah,

In the Torah and Navi we read about the prayers of many women. For instance:

1. Rifka – the commentator Rashi writes that while Yitzchak prayed to Hashem in one corner that they should have a child, Rifka would pray in the other corner. – heard – "שמע" Leah – called her second son Shimon – from the word .2 Hashem heard her prayers and granted her another son. 3. Rachel – prayed to Hashem that she have a child. 4. Miriam – she sang in praise to Hashem at the Red Sea 5. Devora – she sang in praise to Hashem for saving the Jewish people. 6. Chana – prayed to Hashem that she may have a child and then gave thanksgiving and praise to Hashem.

As we can see, some prayed to Hashem when they needed to ask for help, others in praise and thanksgiving.

The Torah states that we should "Serve Hashem with our hearts". The Rambam states that this means Prayer and thus Prayer is a Mitzva from the Torah, but the times of prayer, the amount of prayers and their format, were instituted by

the Rabbis. Until the time of Ezra (beginning of the second Temple), people would petition Hashem in prayer each according his ability – spontaneously - some once a day, others many times a day. During the time of Ezra, though, people were unable to properly ask Hashem for their needs, due to their dispersion in the Diaspora. Seeing this, Ezra decided to make the format of the Amida – 18 blessings, and they decided to make the number of prayers like the number of Sacrifices brought daily in the Temple – Shachrit for the morning sacrifice and Mincha for the evening sacrifice and Maariv in the evening for the burning of the parts of the sacrifices that were burnt at night. That is how we got a regular format and times for prayer every day. According to the Rambam, when the Mishna explicitly states that Women are obligated in Prayer (i.e. – the blessing of the Amida – the Shmone Esreh)., they must pray at least once a day since prayer is not a time-bound positive mitzvah.

***Brain Teaser – The Nachmanadies disagrees and thinks that according to the Torah we had no obligation to pray and Ezra instituted the requirement to pray - not just the format and the times. Thus prayer is a Time-Bound Positive Mitzvah. Even though women are generally exempt from time bound mitzvah, they are required to pray since Prayer is about asking for Hashems mercy and women need Hashems mercy.

Dear Journal,

In the book of Shemuel I, ch. 1-2 read of the story of Chana, who prayed twice in the Tabernacle – once a request for a child, and the second – prayer of thanksgiving and praise to Hashem. From Chana we learn important Laws of prayer:

- "and she speaks on to her heart" – one's heart must have the proper intention to pray

- "only her lips moved" – one must say the words with his mouth (not just read them)

- "and her voice is not heard" – the Amida is said silently

As we can see important laws are learned from Chana's prayers. Some commentators state that one of the reasons all our fore-mothers had no children was because Hashem waited for their prayers. What special prayers do you have to Hashem, Bat Mitzvah? Try and write your own special prayer, incorporating elements of request, praise and thanksgiving for reaching this moment of obligation in the Mitzvot – your Bat Mitzvah. ______.

Dear Bat Mitzvah,

A special characteristic of the Jewish people are their acts of Chesed – loving kindness. Chesed is all about doing good without expecting anything back (“being good for nothing”). Tell us special acts of Chesed you do:______. The story of Ruth is all about Chesed. The chesed Ruth did for Noami changed history. Ruth, a Moabite princess, became a true and sincere convert, and followed her mother- in-law Noami to the Land of Israel, a foreign and strange place for her. Ruth then married Boaz and became the great-grandmother of King David, thus gaining the title “Mother of Royalty”.

Dear Bat Mitzvah,

Beyond Ruth's acts of Chesed, the Megilla notes a special degree of Modesty in Ruth. What is modesty? To what does it apply? Discuss.

Read the following parable:

"A king once had an only daughter. She was the apple of his eye and he guarded her with his life, and cared and spoiled her. She had a special tutor for math, another for art and a third for poise and manners. A special chef

was hired to cook her meals and an expert seamstress made her clothes from the finest velvets and silks. When she grew up, she wished to play with girls her age, playing in the street. She thought to herself: "how lucky they are. They walk freely in the street, eat what they want, dress as they wish and speak as they want, even if they are loud and noisy…but I, the princess, can not go where I please, my royal robes are heavy, every word from my mouth must be spoken carefully, uh, its hard to be a princess." One day the princess said to her father: "oh dear father, as I have no siblings I wish to play with girls my age, who dress as they please, talk as they please, go where they want and eat what they want. Please let me go outside…". The loving king said to his daughter: "dear daughter, you are my one and only child. You are a princess, the daughter of a king. Don't you know you are different from the rest of the girls. Don’t you know that all the girls look up to you, seeing you different, special, more refined than other girls? Your uniqueness is your glory - your honor, dear daughter, your honor – is my honor". The princess, lowered her gaze and said "Yes – I am a princess. I am different, special and unique". Dear Journal, What is the lesson learned from this? Who is the king? Who is the princess? ______.

Dear Bat Mitzvah, “Tzneiut, or modesty, is the antithesis of objectification. It is the realization that a person’s true worth comes from within. It is when one’s sense of worth stems not from external factors such

as her figure, wealth, or social standing. RATHER, it is based entirely on actions and inner qualities. Public recognition for its own sake then becomes irrelevant. Modesty is the understanding that beauty cannot be plastered on. True beauty must stem from one’s deeds, speech, and thought, and it radiates from the inside out. This is a beauty which age can only enhance.”1

“For tzeniut is infinitely more than what we wear – it is a way of being, emerging from a deep vision of ourselves. It is inherent in potential within every one of us, male and female, and Judaism encourages us all to nurture it. Most crucially it is the key to all spiritual growth and therefore to the health of our society. Rather than restricting, tzeniut is in the most profound sense, life giving.”2

The prophet Micah states "and you should walk modestly with Hashem your G-d". Modesty is a required both from men and from women. Men, due to their more public nature, lost a certain degree of closeness to Hashem attained from modesty. Women, on the other hand, are privileged to resemble Hashem through modesty. Just as Hashem does not reveal himself, so to a woman doesn’t reveal herself to everyone – just like a princess. The Halacha states certain requirements regarding modesty in dress: the length of sleeves, the length of your skirt and that married women should cover their hair. Though the Halacha states certain requirements, modesty is all about choosing the correct clothing for a time and place, for the wearer and her surroundings. Modesty is not just about clothes. It encompasses they way we walk, they way we talk, with whom we befriend, how we eat, our mannerisms. We should always remember that the Jewish woman is likened to a princess and that her "כל כבודה בת מלך פנימה" .honor and glory shine from deep inside

1 M. Goodman, Why should I stand behind a Mechitza when I could be a prayer leader, Jerusalem 2002 2 G. Manolson, Outside/Inside, p. 19.

Dear Bat Mitzvah,

Over the History of the Jewish People there have been many great and important women. The Talmud writes about the women in Egypt that due to their righteousness, the Jewish people were redeemed from Egypt. The Jewish women in the Midbar (desert) continued the tradition of the Jewish women in Egypt – they refused to take part in the sin of the Golden Calf, as they refused to give over their golden jewelry for making of the Calf. In reward, Hashem gave women the very special holiday of Rosh Chodesh. Many women refrain from doing work on Rosh Chodesh – as it’s a very special day for women.

In other chapters we spoke about the learned daughters of Tzelafchad, our righteous mothers Sarah, Rifka, Rachel and Leah and of the modesty and chesed of Ruth. Of course we had many brave women like Yocheved and Miriam, who defied Pharoh and let the Jewish baby boys live, like Esther, who chanced death to save the Jewish people and Yehudit, who killed the commander of the Greek army in the time of the Chashmonaim. Dear Journal, Who were the following famous Jewish women? - Golda Meir______- Noami______- Chana Senesh______- Dina______- Devora______

- Sarah Schneirer______

Dear Journal,

In the book of Mishlei (Proverbs), King Solomon writes about the traits of a woman of valor. He writes these traits according to the order of the Aleph-Bet. Write down several of these traits. Which ones appeal to you? Who praises the Woman of Valor? On one hand the woman is described as wearing beautiful clothing and on the other hand King Solomon opposes vanity – what do you think?______

These verses are traditionally said on Friday night after the Shalom Aleichem and before the Kiddush. Some say that as the woman is the basis of the home and no Jewish home can have a tranquil Shabbat without that special Woman of Valor and thus we praise her before we say the Kiddush. What do you think? ______

Dear Bat Mitzvah, The Code of Jewish Law states: “One should make a special meal on the day that his son becomes Bar Mitzvah” Some commentators state that words of Torah should be said in order for it to be considered a “Seudat Mitzvah”. Namely, just eating is not a “Mitzva”! It’s our job to turn the meal into something substantial, meaningful and into a meal that is no less then a religious experience then davening and eating Matza! But what about the Bat Mitzvah? Do we celebrate it, or forget about it? Eavesdrop to the following conversation between 11 year old Yaael and her grandmother. Grandmother; On my BAT-MITZVA DAY, I recived a beautiful leather bound Siddur from my Parents. Oh- How I adored that present. Yael- But Savta- Today that’s not the way it’s done. Today, we have a huge party with many presents! G- What? Are you saying that today they have a Bat Mitzva party like a wedding, with a band that kills your ears and hundreds of guests? Yael and her Grandmother continued to argue/talk for another hour, until Yael’s Father came home, took out an article written by Rabbi Grossman3 the code of Jewish Law and began to read; “ There is reason to make a party for a Girl when she turns 12 because now she is obligated in the commandments. And even though this was not done in the past, it seems that the reason was since back then, there wasn’t a tendency to have so many parties. But since today we make parties for so

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many other things, it is very appropriate to have a proper celebration for such an important religious milestone as well, especially if we speak about Torah and the special laws and status of Women”. When Yael’s Dad finished reading the article, both Yael and her Grandmother looked pleased.

Dear Journal, 1) Let’s try and understand the reasons why Yael and her Gradmother disagree with one another. Let’s conduct a role-play and hear the entire debate! 2) Go home and ask your Mother, Aunts and Grandmother/ Grandmothers what they had done for their Bat-Mitzva. Write down their stories [and maybe even invite them to class to hear from them personally]

The Bat Mitzvah Files – Personal Report

As part of our search into the inner meaning of becoming a “Bat Mitzvah”, we “Benot Mitzvah” will each research a different topic to be presented as part of our “Bat Mitzvah” files. The first part will be a written report/summary on your chosen topic. To this each girl will then add an artistic/visual element. The entire project will be presented before the congregation as part of that girls Bat Mitzvah celebration. The Topics are as follows: • • • • • • • • •

Bat Mitzvah Program- Beth Israel 2005

• Greetings for the Bat-Mitzvah girl • Who am I & what’s my name? • Ma Nishtana? • What changes- I do Mitzvot now too? • Bar Mitzvah and Bat Mitzvah • The obligations of a Girl in doing Mitzvot; 1) Positive and Negative Commandments 2) Time Bound Commandments 3) The reason for their exemptions. • Time Bounded Commandments that Women are obligated in. • If Exempt- Can we do it anyway? • The unique commandments for Women; 1) Shabbat Candles 2) Separating Challa • My Home • Girls learning Torah • Obligation to Daven- How much? • Unique attributes of Jewish Women; ¾ Acts of loving kindness ¾ Modesty ¾ The power of Women • Oh tree- How beautiful are you? • The Merit of Women • Blessing for Women • The Bat-Mitzvah; Sources and Customs. • Eshet Chayil • Personal projects and Bat Mitzvah’s.