HONI SOIT

Sexism at Cumbo Campus 4-5 Tim Minchin vs. God 8-9 Frontline: Syria’s refugee crisis 14-15 Honi’s winning Opinion Comp entries 16-18 letters

Acknowledgement Thoughts, Feelings and Notices The editors of Honi Soit and the SRC acknowledge the traditional owners of this land, the Gadigal people of the Eora nation. Honi Soit is written, printed, and distributed on Aboriginal land. If you are reading this, you are standing on Aboriginal land. Please recognise and respect this. Sound and Fury We acknowledge both our privilege and our obligation to redress the situation as best we can: to remember the mistakes of the past, act on the problems of today, and build a future for everyone who calls this place home, striving always for practical and meaningful reconciliation. Hi Honi (particularly Rebecca Wong, speak against the motion from the Labor Wednesday’s two and a half hour long on a non-existent stack of the SASS Sam Langford, Mary Ward and Naaman factions was myself (which makes the line meeting” is even more disappointing— AGM—which is about as interesting as, Zhou), “several of them spoke against the motion” instead of discussing the debate that well, SASS. beyond incorrect, unless this is a subtle dig occurred between councillors, the writers I’ve managed to avoid writing a letter at representative democracy?) —Also, side have boiled the issue down to the view Yours in Unity, to the Editors for five years, but after note: yes NLS did remain in the meeting, of the winning side, and left out every Contents Editorial posting numerous Facebook rants and but did not speak on the motion, but argument made against these changes. I Robby Magyar casually complaining in Courtyard I have congratulatory tweets for them staying find it ridiculous that the voices of “white 4-5: Investigation 13: Perspective So here we here, almost at the end of it all. Mistakes aside, every week we really did decided, enough is enough—I’m a little behind cropped up, which you know, is people” were preferenced in this article over Ps. I look forward to the online vitriol I Honi goes to Cumberland campus Andy Mason on relating to 24 issues, 154 cheese pizzas and about 400 try to fill these pages with voices of people excited, but be gentle, it’s my first time... nice. two women of colour who spoke against receive for having an opinion—I really country. bottles of the BWS cleanskin later, we’re who cared; with people who were engaged, The reason for the letter—I’m really sick these changes. Their voices were not only hope Rafi Alam posts a Facebook status 6-7: Perspective all much the same: a bit fatter, a bit paler, alive and aware of their world—and brave of the consistent inaccuracies that crop up Anyway, when I spoke against the changes, ignored in that meeting in preference to delegitimise everything I say again, that Liberty Lawson on moon cups for 14-15: Feature papers produced, papers pulped. enough to write about it. It requires a in Gronkwatch, which is ironic given the yes fee deregulation was something I for the dominant view (ACAR and the was super fun! refugees Clodagh Scofield on working with huge amount of trust to put your name to title of the section... So I have to ask, who mentioned, however my tirade focused Ethno-Cultural Officer Bearers—neither Ellie Rogers and Oliver Moore refugees at Lesvos. It occurred to me recently that Honi something in print so if you invested any watches the Gronkwatch? on the very real threats to education of whom were present in the meeting), but on furnishing an apartment really has a fundamentally stupid business of that in us this year, thank you. happening on this campus (removal of they’ve also been erased from the discourse through theft 16-18: Honi Opinion Comp model: Get 10 people to spend 12 months In the latest edition of Honi I specially simple extensions, university restructure), thanks to Gronkwatch. I don’t really care Adam Goodes Alexi Polden on the Left grappling with InDesign and the basics I’m under no illusions—year to year, few take issue with the section of Gronkwatch which ultimately two well-paid Education that my contribution to this debate was Rebecca Wong asked the internet 19-23: SRC/SUPRA of defamation law. Make sure none have things really change with Honi. But even “Labor take their leave”—which makes up Officers should be fighting against next not mentioned, because heck, I’ve been a question any particular managerial experience, if the paper doesn’t change all that much, less than ¼ of the entire article (despite year—with a President who receives at blocked out of ACAR since its inception Dear Honi Editors, 24: Puzzles then see how they go coordinating 100+ please trust that people do. This year, I’ve focusing on considerable changes to minimum, a full time wage. so it makes no difference that my views 8-9: In Too Deep reporters and artists of diverse talent and seen young reporters who used to need two the SRC). Firstly, “to nobody’s surprise” get blocked out in Honi as well—but if On behalf of the Indigenous Collective we Tom Goodwin emailed Tim 25-27: The Garter temperament, endlessly searching for weeks to write an article turn one around the writers have yet again failed to do The average student might not care, but a you’re going to report on student politics would like to thank you for all the work Minchin about God polite ways of saying “Oh God we can’t in two days. I’ve seen news reporters basic fact checking. The councillors who conversation that has gone on for months at all, get it right and be balanced ffs. you put into securing the interview with publish this” at 2am in the morning. Let venture into comedy and culture writers walked out of the meeting were from SLS and took up over an hour of the SRC Adam Goodes that was published in your 10-11: Perspective those 10 people get to a point where try their hand at opinion. I’ve seen my and Unity, not from NLS—(yes, there meeting to discuss probably deserves more All in all, this article was a toilet. last edition. We would especially like to Aaron Chen on coffee trend. they’ve maybe, just maybe, got control of fellow editors become clearer, stronger and are differences between NLS and SLS, than a paragraph write up. acknowledge your initiative in suggesting Rebecca Wong interviews Kat that hurtling train… and then throw them braver in their imagination and resolve. a big one being the first letter of each I give Gronkwatch this week one poo out to Goodes’ team that the interview be Armstrong. all out and get in a whole new bunch. faction’s name). The only councillor to Then the second paragraph on “last of five, because the entire thing focused conducted by an Indigenous student. That stuff is cool to see and if you read, By doing so you were able to highlight 12: Culture The only thing you can really guarantee commented, liked or shared any of yours the voices of the Indigenous students on Dominic Ellis on Magic with a model like that is that every ideas with us this year you made it possible. campus and produce a piece that effectively Yitzi Tuvel on Zedtown editorial team will make mistakes. So from the 2015 editors, sorry for all the discussed issues that affect the Indigenous Creative, professional, personal, more fuck ups and thanks so much for reading. community. We would also like to thank than a few ethical—messing up seems all the editors who transcribed the to be built into the system. If you stuck interview. Special thank you to Alex who with us despite that, then thank you. If you Joanna Connolly was fundamental in the organization of called us out on it at any point, thank you. the interview and Dom who helped both Furious Facebook comments taught me in the organising of the interview, the final far more this year than polite praise. steps of getting it published and helped promote the interview by sending it to a Credits number of external media outlets. The Indigenous Collective thanks you for Editor-in-Chief: Joanna Connolly. your commitment, not only in the Adam Goodes piece but throughout the year, in Editors: Tim Asimakis, Alex Downie, Dominic Ellis, Sophie Gallagher, Samantha publishing the voices of Indigenous people Jonscher, Patrick Morrow, Alexi Polden, Peter Walsh, Rebecca Wong. and/or articles that give an insight into lived experiences of Indigenous people. Contributors: Aaron Chen, Tom Goodwin, Liberty Lawson, Oliver Moore, Ellie Rogers, Clodagh Scofield, Yitzi Tuvel. Congratulations on a fantastic piece.

Artists/Illustrators/Photographers: Bryant Apolonio, Stephanie Barahona, Alex Kind Regards, “Grills” Grilanc, Johanna Roberts. Indigenous Collective

Cover art: Zita Walker

Art by Alex “Grills” Grilanc. Puzzles: EN Proofreader: Lachlan Deacon

Disclaimer: Honi Soit is published by the Students’ Representative Council, University of Sydney, Level 1 Wentworth Building, City Road, University of Sydney NSW 2006. The SRC’s operation costs, space and administrative support are financed by the University of Sydney. Honi Soit is printed under the auspices of the SRC’s directors of student publications: Christopher Warren, Serena May, James Rusiti, Ilya Klauzner, Charlie O’Grady, and Alison Xiao. All expressions are published on the basis that they are not to be regarded as the opinions of the SRC unless specifically stated. The Council accepts no responsibility for the accuracy of any of the opinions or information contained within this newspaper, nor does it endorse any of the advertisements and insertions. 3 investigation investigation

bangs such a thrill! when I was younger, and in my prime, I used to gang bang all The Cumbo boys are off their guts the time’ Classic cumbo chant.”. Hoorah, Hoorah Patterson is currently overseas and was unable to respond to questions about the Tits and clits are very nice post. We’ll suck them once and fuck them twice CUMBO *** And we’ll all go back and get on the piss again. I WISH THAT ALL THE LADIES/ *** FELLAS When Inskip was approached for I wish that all the ladies comment, he provided a two-page response on behalf of the Guild explaining Were just like Chrissy its decision to cease contact with Honi Soit, “pending legal advice.” He did not respond I wouldn’t even touch her to later specific questions about his chant. UNCUT Mr. Inskip also wrote “The campus has a I find her a bit too pissy very inclusive culture that promotes free thought and proliferates the notion that as Honi Soit investigates the corrupt culture at Cumberland campus. Singing hey bop-beruba future allied health professionals, our role is to serve the broader community and help CUMBO RANGER (one person leads and emblazoned lab-coats, start drinking at at night-time frivolities that triggered Ohhh bop-a-ruba those that are most vulnerable. We support everyone repeats): From the, town of Lidcombe Cumbo and make their way into Kings complaints and the team’s removal from the university policies on gender equality Cross by train) finishes on an image of the Games. University Games.” To its credit, in 2011 CSG attempted to *** and discrimination and are proud of the I wanna be a Cumbo Ranger We’re the fucking university CSG’s logo. change the chants. It ran a competition inclusive environment on our campus, The nature and number of complaints is What occurred in Wollongong did not that offered $500 prize money to “create Another post to ESSSA’s Facebook page where in CSG there exists a significant Living life of sex and danger When you, come and see the beavers play *** under contention. CSG told Honi that stop players on the team from receiving a new, media-friendly Cumbo chant” features a video of the current President of representation of female staff, inclusive of no formal complaints and “not really” any SUSF scholarships the following year. that would “be taken away to the Eastern CSG, Michael Inskip, leading a rendition executive officers and board members, as 69er You will, say that we are fucking great RUNNING DOWN THE SIDELINE - informal complaints were lodged. Others University Games 2011 and O-Camp of “I wish that all the ladies” (the above well as a diverse cultural community.” Female Version: sources understood that three complaints Nine members of the 2013 team returned 2012”. A winner was chosen, but the chant) on a NSW Transport train. The Scuba diver When you’re, with team Cumbo were lodged by other universities to AUS. to the EUGs this year, led by the same culture was hard to change—uptake was footage, from before Inskip was elected A common thread in Honi’s correspondence Running down the sideline with my tits in captain. No questions were raised about minimal and students quickly reverted to President, was filmed en route to Kings with CSG and ESSSA was the notion There once was a girl that I liked best Have a suckie suckie good time my hand What is uncontested is that CSG their behaviour. CSG called them “a the old chants. Cross for ESSSA’s 2014 “Back 2 Skool” of Cumberland Campus being proudly voluntarily withdrew the team from beautiful group of boys”. Party. In the video, USyd students wearing apolitical. Mr. Inskip “will diligently defend I use to suck her on the breast A fucking great time I’m a mean motherfucker I’m from Cumbo- the Games (rather than an AUS- The old chants are still publicly available their high school uniforms take turns the right for members of the Cumberland land imposed removal). If AUS were to have *** on ESSSA’s Facebook page. They were leading the Cumbo chants, which are campus, the constituency represented by Now she’s dead but not forgotten You’ll never sleep all night removed the team, its members risked posted by Laura Patterson, 2014 CSG echoed by the rest of the carriage. the Guild, to have an environment that is Lick sip suck “something going against their degree”. BEERS AND BONGS - Female Version: Treasurer and ESSSA President, eight free of political agenda and influence, and Dig her up and fuck her rotten *** Additionally, acting pre-emptively meant months after the Wollongong incident. ESSSA has not escaped controversy either. allow constituents to formulate their own Nibble nobble chew that Cumberland’s other teams avoided Beers and bongs and nuts and dicks In March this year, the society released the view free of excessive media influence.” Fuck her lying Cumberland Campus is home to USyd’s collective punishment—something that The occasion was ESSSA’s 2014 lab- pictured t-shirt, which was designed by its Faculty of Health Sciences (FHS). I’m a Cumbo chick happened to Macquarie University in Hurrah hurrah coat pub crawl, and Ms Patterson wrote executive with the assistance of a concept The Cumbo chants have a place in the Fuck her dying Cumberland Student Guild (CSG) is 2012. “Shouldn’t need to post this, but for all artist. culture of CSG and ESSSA events. Both the local equivalent of Camperdown’s Who the fuck are youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu The Cumbo chicks are off their tits you maggots who didn’t go to O camp or their teaching at O-Camp and their If I had wings I’d fuck her flying University of Sydney Union (USU). Upon the team’s return to Sydney, its two haven’t had the honour of representing *** dissemination through social media have Like the USU, CSG facilitates clubs and *** (student) managers attended an AUS Hurrah hurrah Cumbo at uni games yet, here are all of assisted their survival. Perhaps the lack of *** societies (C&S) on campus, offering free disciplinary hearing via telephone. At the our chants. You will need to know these BEERS AND BONGS - Male version: external critique has had something to do use of its facilities for C&S events. Only What exactly happened at the 2013 hearing, AUS made the decision to ban all Big fat dicks are very nice for tonight as we will be yelling it from the with it too. This year’s Eastern University Games were two events are run directly by CSG each Uni Games remains unclear. Australian fifteen team members from the following roof tops!!!”. Beers and bongs and buts and sluts held in the regional hub of Wagga Wagga. year: O-Camp, an orientation camp for University Sport (AUS), organiser of the year’s EUGs. We’ll suck them once and we’ll fuck them twice USyd’s Cumberland Campus, whose new FHS students which is led by older Games, would only say that it believed the One commenter replied “‘Cause a gang Hoorah, Hoorah teams enter the Games separately to the students, and Cumbo’s annual EUGs incident “was handled well by both the Apart from the telephone judiciary And we’ll go out and get on the piss again rest of USyd, performed particularly well. excursion. Sometimes CSG also plays a university and AUS at the time”. CSG attended by the team’s two managers and Cumbo’s “Beavers”, akin to USyd’s “Lions”, role in orientation day. spoke broadly of a “bad team culture” and resultant ban, team members were not The Cumbo chants have been around since took home the Per Capita Champion mentioned “banter” but were unable to be subject to further disciplinary action. In long before the 2013 Eastern University trophy, awarded for the best pound-for- The C&S scene at Cumberland is more specific. our interview, CSG spoke of the team’s Games. pound performance by a university. pretty quiet. Apart from the Evangelical “rehabilitation” but only detailed standard Christian Union, the society with the Honi understands that the team’s removal measures taken ahead of subsequent *** Much of this was thanks to Cumbo’s men’s biggest presence is the Exercise and Sports from the Games relates at least in part to EUGs, which all teams took part in, like football team, which won its respective Science Student Association (ESSSA). Its its public recital of the “Cumbo chants”. AUS’ “Be the influence” program. CSG is structured such that several paid tournament undefeated and was the only motto, “Scientia Cum Laxus”—translated staff work together with the unpaid student team from Cumberland to achieve a top- as “science in looseness”—reflects the The Cumbo chants are not difficult to According to CSG, the Faculty was Board of Directors to “enhance the student three finish. society’s party culture. ESSSA’s Facebook find. The chants—excerpted throughout notified of the incident. When asked how experience on campus”. When Honi sat page description explains that “ESSSA is this article—are available on ESSSA’s the Faculty responded, CSG said “they down with two members of that paid staff, For nine of the team’s fifteen players, the heart and soul of this otherwise faceless Facebook page, which was where we didn’t”. A spokesperson from the Faculty CSG’s General Manager and Sports and victory was even sweeter. Two years earlier, educational facility. Coming to Cumbo found them. In short, they are a number wrote “The University’s relationship with Student Experience Coordinator, they at the 2013 EUGs in Wollongong, they and not joining ESSSA is like going to explained that the chants have “been reached the grand final but did not play ancient Rome and not participating in around forever”. CSG’s staff members in it. A day before the decider, the team elaborate mass orgies and honour killings agreed that some—but not all—of the was sent home. They forfeited all points or going to Michael Jackson’s house and “It tears you apart visiting innocent people in high security chants were “disgraceful”, “horrendous” and all team members were banned from not getting molested.” and “banned”. If students were to sing attending the 2014 EUGs in Newcastle. prisons with no prospect of release. Of course it’s stressful.” them in the presence of CSG staff, “they’d Wagga was redemption. ESSSA has pretty close ties with CSG. be going home, no second chances”. Last year, ESSSA’s President was also *** Treasurer of CSG. This year, one of Other Cumbo chants are “really funny and ESSSA’s co-presidents is also one of the of ditties that contain, among other things, the Cumberland Student Guild and any they’re not inappropriate and they’re not FLINTSTONES: two student directors of CSG. CSG staff references to Soulja Boy, necrophilia and enquiries in relation to this are managed by gross”, but the staff conceded that they post about upcoming first-aid courses on oral sex. the Registrar’s Office. To our knowledge “might get the filtered version”. Aware of Cumbo, We’re from Cumbo ESSSA’s Facebook page and ESSSA’s the Faculty of Health Sciences was not the chants, CSG’s staff were resigned to highlights video for its annual lab-coat It was their public recital at a sports ground formally notified of any issues relating them—“how can I eradicate that many We’re the health science faculty pub crawl (where students don USyd- in Wollongong as well as their resurfacing to teams competing in the 2013 Eastern years of foul, engrained culture?”. 4 5 perspective perspective A Period In Detention The Internet is Racist Liberty Lawson spoke to Kate Milanowicz about the struggle to access sanitary products on Nauru. Rebecca Wong found out that a picture is worth 250 words.

surrounding a Senate inquiry into conditions this year, Save the Children gave evidence how great and convenient they were, and one lind people have really niche pastimes. bracelet is partially visible on her wrist. Her flowing silky dress of bright colors, orange, Art by Stephanie Barahona on Nauru, Milanowicz was inspired to start that the reason they were given from guards day I just thought well, I guess this could be Last week, my friends and I discovered legs and feet are not visible on this picture. yellow and salmon. She has short brown a campaign to offer these women another were that pads were a security hazard as they a solution for the women in Nauru. I’m not Ban online service called ‘Describe!’. For $6, hair. Her dress has a low neckline, revealing option. were allegedly soaked in gasoline during saying that menstrual cups are the perfect it offers three 250-word descriptions of Under her soft wrap she is wearing a simple the skin of her upper chest. Her arms are 2013 riots at the centre. But as Senator solution. Not all women feel comfortable an image—seemingly a fair price to pay sleeveless yellow shift. It has a large scooped bare as the dress is also sleeveless. She has LL: Could you describe the situation for Hanson-Young pointed out in response, using them, as they require a certain level of for vicarious sight. Eager to find out what neck and reaches almost to her knees. The beautiful skin. She’s wearing very little women in Nauru for us? there were no female detainees in the centre comfort and understanding of your own body, everyone else looked like, we each submitted soft layered wrap itself is two-tone with ties jewelry, nothing around her neck or on at that time. which some women may not be accustomed a photo of ourselves for examination. Here’s at the waist. The orange panel is on the left her arms, but she is wearing a large ring KM: Numerous refugee advocates have to. But by providing them as an option, at what the internet thought of me. and the peach is on the right. Where the on her left hand which rests by her side. publicly spoken out about women in Nauru Whilst I personally do not accept the alleged least it gives women another choice that they ties come at the waist the wrap touches and Her right arm is bent at the elbow and her being subjected to a humiliating process in flammability argument as it is ridiculous to can explore and discuss with other women. Description 1: the whole garment is likely tied toward her right hand is on her hip, as she is posing for order to access sanitary pads. ban an essential item when almost anything back. The material of the wrap is quite soft table lamp that is behind the woman and the camera. She has light blue fingernail can start a fire, that is why I decided to The better solution would be to dispense all This room is quite dark: a single table lamp with the top layer reaching her waist and not fully in view as a result. There is an polish on. The flash from the camera has Some reports have detailed that women propose another solution––menstrual cups. sanitary products freely, but this issue has throws light up behind the woman standing the under-layer reaching gracefully to the oriental flavor to the decorations with a made the young woman stand out from have been made to wait in line for up to four been discussed time and time again without before the camera’s lens. There is a couch floor. Indeed she is a woman who catches large oriental statue on a shelf as a focal the relatively drab background of the living or most young Australian women, hours in order to request their ration of four Menstrual cups are completely reusable and resolution, so putting forward another and some chairs along the wall arranged in your attention. point of the interior design. There is a room. She is so beautiful and happy she is periods are an inconvenience at worst. pads from male guards, whilst other recent they’re made of silicone, which has a low solution may add a level of rationality to the a conversation group. Large paintings and a simple white fireplace, a sofa, and chairs. A positively glowing in this moment. There FHowever, just off Australian shores, the reports have said that women now receive flammability risk. They also don’t pose health debate. Ultimately though, people who have mirror are hung on the walls in the gloom. Description 2: large mirror is mounted on the wall behind are some clues in the living room that she women in the Nauru detention centre are pads on an ‘as needs’ basis from male guards risks like toxic shock syndrome, and they are been found to be genuine refugees do not To the right of the image, one mirror catches the sofa. The entire scene communicates to is Asian. We see a large Asian statue in the not so lucky. Due to ‘fire safety concerns’ and each time they visit the bathroom. environmentally friendly. One cup lasts up to belong in detention and processing should be a distant window covered with a long sheer A young woman is posing for the picture me a woman who is living well and who background and a small Asian style end insufficient supplies, women are required to ten years, and can stay in for up to 12 hours, quick and efficient, but that’s another story curtain and other furniture. in a formal living room. She is oriental fully enjoys it. She doesn’t appear to have table with a tea pot or incense pot on top. line up for hours to request sanitary pads From a practical point of view this just doesn’t so you don’t have to worry about changing completely. with short black hair. She has a big smile. any current major problems or challenges (sometimes while bleeding through their make sense, and from a human perspective, them during the day. They are also easy to The petite Asian woman in the center has She is wearing a short yellow dress that is in her life. She has every expectation that Other than those items, however, the room clothes) from a male guard––a humiliating it doesn’t take into account that these clean. LL: How can the readers of Honi Soit help? the brightest of smiles covering her entire performing the function of a shell. It is tomorrow will be as good as yesterday and is furnished American style with 2 chairs, and culturally insensitive process for women women come from different backgrounds face. The outer edges or her black hair are covered by loose fitting lounging pajamas today for her. sofa, lamp, large mirror and a fireplace in who are often already traumatised and and cultures and often feel extremely LL: What inspired your campaign for KM: Readers of Honi Soit can help by absorbed in the darkness but the glow on that are pink on one side and a muted the background. This girl is very happy and vulnerable. embarrassed about having to approach menstrual cups? How would they be better contacting the Minister for Immigration her cheeks cannot be missed. Even her orange on the other. The pajamas reach Description 3: is dressed for an occasion. We speculate a male guard for a pad. It is incredibly than regular sanitary pads? Peter Dutton to suggest that the dispensation eyes are alive with the joy that she feels. to the floor. Her right hand is on her right where her family is from, perhaps Nepal. While working as an immigration caseworker culturally insensitive and dehumanising, and of sanitary items be deregulated in Nauru Her left arm is relaxed at her side. Her hip while her other arm hangs loosely at The picture shows a radiant young woman But she was born in America and lives here for Greens Senator Sarah Hanson-Young, places women in the uncomfortable position KM: I don’t think many people want to and that menstrual cups should be provided nails are painted a soft blue and she has a her side. She has baby blue nail polish on standing in a living room smiling at the now. She is about to go out on an important journalist Kate Milanowicz first became of having to ask men for pads or go without. speak out about reproductive issues, or their as an option. large exquisite ring on her index finger. Her the nails of both hands. Her arms are quite camera. She is in her late teens or perhaps date with someone she is fond of, and who aware of the issue from refugees themselves For those that go without, many make do own menstrual related habits, but a large right had rests gently on her right hip with thin and her figure is neither too thin nor twenty years old. She seems to be of Asian has captured this moment forever in the and advocates. However, the wider public with makeshift pads are constructed from percentage of the population bleeds and we Readers can also sign and share this petition her fingers coming forward, and a bluish too heavy. The room is dimly lit by a single descent. She is wearing a very lovely long picture. remained unaware of the claims. Milanowicz tent fabric or whatever else they can find. need to talk about it. Especially when already to get menstrual cups for women in Nauru, began thinking of alternative solutions for vulnerable women are being made to feel as it will submitted to the minister for the women of Nauru, and had hopes of LL: Why would there be restrictions on humiliated about it. consideration and the more people that sign encouraging the media to discuss women’s something so basic and essential? the better: reproductive rights more openly. After the Many of my friends and I converted to Bringing Down The House issue was brought to public attention in July, KM: Well, during the Nauru inquiry earlier menstrual cups and would often talk about https://www.change.org/p/minister-peter- dutton-menstrual-cups-for-nauru Ellie Rogers and Oliver Moore offer some home decorating tips that match your budget.

he student housing crisis has long been acknowledged, with too little available, what is available being unaffordable, and most being farmed out to third party services rather than managed by the university itself. Roughly 90% of students live in private accommodation (that is, not living at home or in a university-maintained property), and coming upT with the $375 a week to rent a UniLodge studio whilst juggling full time uni, part time jobs, and extracurriculars (mostly CV-stuffing and partying on weeknights), is by no Last Against The Wall means a simple task . It’s no surprise that students are looking for a new, cost-effective option to furnishing apartments. So, we went through the uni and tested what was and wasn’t bolted to the ground, and beautifully furnished a UniLodge studio. Alexi Polden wonders if the left is always right. The bookcase on the ground floor of here’s a letter that I read sometimes, philosophical stagnation of internal crisis retort, “Ah, but you’re forgetting the class or socialist/Maoist language, ill thought out Woolley one of the few papers my grandfather many in the left have forgotten just how consciousness of the revolution, what it set song choices, really particularly phase me. This bookcase is the definition of class in managedT to keep on his long journey as a badly our favoured system can work out. out to do”. An off-colour joke here or there doesn’t antiquity. Its rich wood and swinging glass refugee to Australia. If you can read Polish make you bad or necessarily a hypocrite. display doors are only part of the story—it and understand the code used to evade Perhaps my complaint is unclear; I’ll You’ll be pleased to know my gripe isn’t comes accompanied with all sorts of classic censors the message is simple. spell it out. For all our (rightly justified) Eurocentric. Early this year ARMED, the Honestly, I just expect a little better. Political titles. From a quick glance it seems to be concerns about systemic failings, about “intersectional, anti-racist media collective” movements should be self aware, and mostly things you’ve pretended to have Your family are gone. You can never return microaggressions and oppression, about published “Ask Comrade F - ARMED’s acknowledge the faults in their past. I don’t read in order to impress a lacklustre date, home. colonisation and economic servitude we very own advice column with our in-house take the lazy fetishisation as some kind of so this should give you perfect deniability forget that so many of those features Marxist-Leninist-Maoist expert…” The endorsement of Stalin’s reign, but I think if you manage to make it back to your And he didn’t. One day my grandfather left existed in the failed socialist project. That’s advice, which opened with a quote from it’s a little endemic of a left wing failure to place. If you don’t want to go to the effort home to study, and, some time later, his family not even the root of what I struggle with: Mao suggested (in great humour I’m sure) grapple with the realities of our preferred of carrying all the books from Woolley to were gone, some shot, others disappeared to as generations of my fellow leftists have that an advice-seeker “Set about at once to society. That said, this paper isn’t really a yours, you can always just pick some really Sibera where they’d inevitably perish. pointed out, a few failed experiments doesn’t purge these reactionary tendencies from your political treatise, all I really set out to say was obscure titles from Fisher and renew them destroy a theory. partner”, among other things. The post was that words sometimes words hurt, and we forever. The Final Product... His experience wasn’t particularly unique. met with rightful disdain and, admittedly shouldn’t forget the past. This dubious cupboard from the Quad, Though nobody really knows how many What really riles me is the contempt and followed by an apology—but exemplifies and whatever mysteries it holds people died under Stalin, the figures are disregard shown by so many for the pain the strange lack of self-reflection so endemic If you want a more assertive conclusion, Has anyone ever opened it? Is this where The bean bags in Carslaw 24 Hour Finally, for the artier types out there, the staggering. The lowest estimates are around suffered under socialist regimes. I simply among people otherwise so keen to do the I’ll borrow from Lezek Kołakowski’s 1974 they keep the bodies of students who You’re better than this. biannual campaign season should give you 20 million, the largest up to 60. Even on don’t understand how people active in social right thing. letter to E.P Thompson “My Correct View fail PHIL1011? Is it a portal to another ample material to: the lowest that’s 1830 deaths for every day movements, who understand the pains that on Everything”. dimension? Filled with rejected simple Stalin was in power. A million deaths may can be suffered by digging up old wounds This mindlessness isn’t restricted to the extension requests? Take it today to find out! Make a papier-mâche lover out of be easy to write off as statistics—but, most of and carrying on soiled narratives can turn campus left. Near the end of every intervarsity “This is a banal but important point which leftover HTVs them, meant someone like my grandfather around and post photos of Stalin on their debating tournament my much loved USU I hope is clear to you. I simply refuse to A giant hashtag “”””sculpture””””” The only way to complete your home- never had a family or a home to return to. Facebook feed. Or how every argument they Debating society chants “Trotsky’s Lament” join people who show how their hearts are Every apartment needs a piece of modern away-from-home experience is with have ends with the refrain “ah, but the libs (better known outside debating as “Red Fly bleeding to death when they hear about any, art so your one night stands thinks you’re a lover who won’t ever leave you. This Of course, it takes very little effort to mourn will be the first against the wall”. the Banners O”)—strangely, the debating big or minor (and rightly condemnable) sophisticated, and this one has the added papier-mâche friend with benefits has the tragedies of generations gone by. The society uses the tasteful Stalinist version of injustice in the US and suddenly become benefit of letting them know you got in to all the advantages of a sex life without debates of the “New” and “Old” Left are I have quite seriously seen complaints (some the chant. wise historiosophists or cool rationalists USyd. It can also be used as a coat rack or ever having to engage meaningfully with banal and useless to the experience of so my own, some by others) about that playful when told about worse horrors of the new hat stand in times of need. another human being. And, anyway, you’ve many. But in the relief of escaping the fetishisation met with the (quite serious) None of these things, a fetishisation of Stalin alternative society.” already been fucked by stupol once… 6 7 feature feature

“How did ‘God’ (a word I don't understand) send ‘Jesus’ (a dead cult leader Tim Minchin vs. God* from dark-ages Palestine) to ‘give us the opportunity to have our sins forgiven’? I honestly don't know what that means. And I'm smarter than you. What gives?” *(As represented by Tom Goodwin...) go for your life - I’ve never once approached a Christians should also not be judgemental. if he made man and then created women to you are now justifying your prejudice... and you Christian and questioned their right to believe It is not our place to judge. It is our place to be with men (and made them compatible replied, ‘ yes, but those other people were wrong’. what they want. let God judge and tell other people that he for procreation) only for the men to be with Which shows how completely you managed to hen I was 16, I emailed singer-songwriter Tim Minchin to talk about God. I had just been to his will judge all of us. other men... avoid thinking about what i said. concert, and as a devout Christian I was offended by his comedic takedowns of my religion. My first I do not claim to have an opinion. I am messageW started a dialogue that was to last for over a year. Below, I have included excerpts from our emails. presenting you with what I believe comes Yeah well, he’s doing a pretty good job of judging Slavery, witch-burning and genocide are and then, like some kind of 5-year-old you said, from the authority of God who made you millions of innocent African kids. If God exists, all WRONG. These have no support in ‘god made men and women so wouldn’t he be in his image. he’s a proper cunt. (And he made his followers the bible… Slavery is not biblical either. In angry with gays?’ to which i actually laughed Hey Tim! frankly, i don’t care. I don’t care if people are meaningless organisms with no purpose Keep this email and read it every now and then. in his image... which might explain why you fact, you may know the story of William out loud. Christian, Hindu, Jew, Atheist, Confucian or in life than to have the most enjoyment Consider it the Book of Timothy’s lost verses. I don’t know what you mean by “God”. I don’t compared homosexuality to rape.) Wilberforce? … I really enjoyed your show. I think you have Pastafarian. But when it comes to my shows, I before we die then what stops us from t know what you mean by God’s “authority”. I that - as the cool kids say these days - is a fail. an amazing ability to be brutally honest and can only write about the things I think about being completely selfish and killing whoever can’t believe you think there’s a God who looks Anyway I am sorry if I sound angry or i have an honest question that i hope you humorous at the same time. - and belief happens to be at the top of the list. we want and having sex with whoever we In the next section, Minchin’s replies are like me. offended at all. I hope that this conversation could answer for me on science. i’m not and, as vonnegut says, so it goes. want etc. Why would we need to worry slotted in between my responses: can remain intellectual. I hope that you may trying to be an arrogant tosser: if science and I apologise in advance for the long email but …Just one note: the notion of sin is nonsense. about ‘moral’ issues such as the ones you You are correct in saying that the sex lives not disregard my points, even though it is this world is based on cause and effect (which Hi Tim, I respect you and value your opinion and was You’ll have to excuse me for any arrogance here, mentioned?... Hey tim, of others has nothing to do with me or any highly likely that you will disregard them as i don’t disagree with) then what caused the hoping that you could write to me addressing but dividing behaviour up like that is extremely other human … However if there is a God, foolishness. big bang? ie. how did the chemicals and When we last emailed 6 years ago, I was some specific topics!! Pretty please... I unhelpful, and if i had any direct advice it Sincerely, Sorry if i have made you sad or infuriated then it matters to Him and even He doesn’t whatever it was, come into existence? an opinionated 16 year old Christian... would love to hear your view on why you would be this: do yourself a favour and forget though may i ask (not to sound arrogant), if force you to have a certain ‘sex life’. He has I find it hard to believe you are only 16. You I’m now 22 and no longer a Christian. I’m so firmly believe that evolution is truth and about the notion of sin. It will ruin your life. Tom G what other people do has nothing to do with told us the way we should live our lives and are very smart (assuming you really are writing cheeeers! sure you’ve had many similar conversations why you say that the only argument against you or me, then why does my ‘difference of will judge accordingly. Though on that note this stuff yourself ). I don’t think you’re a fool - I over the years, so our exchange probably evolution that you have heard is that it is I don’t dismiss Christians nor generalise about *** opinion’ cause you sadness or fury? it is amazing that he does not judge us based wouldn’t bother writing if I did. I wish I had Tom doesn’t immediately spring to memory. I just “only a theory”. I love the way you respect their behaviour. My criticisms of Christianity on the sins we commit but sends Jesus in our time to address all this properly, but I have a 6 thought I would write because toward the the immense beauty in creation and can in my show, “Ready For This”, are very clear I didn’t reply to this, Tom, because I found it sad You make a lot of well thought-out points, but place in order to give us the opportunity to week old baby. we don’t know what caused the big bang. but end of our exchange all those years ago (after only hope that you one day come to see the and very specific: and infuriating. You’re a smart young man and this isn’t one of them. A person’s sexuality doesn’t have our sins forgiven. the idea that it was god simply begs the question, you’d just had a baby), you said “even if I had beautiful mind of the creator who created I hope you learn over time how problematic your hurt you or even affect you, so you don’t need to But even if I had time to have this conversation what caused god? time to have this conversation properly, I the beauty of the earth… “1. The Church’s treatment of homosexuals is opinions are, logically and morally. have a moral opinion on it. That’s what I mean I don’t think you even know what you mean properly, I know it would have no impact on know it would have no impact on you”. hypocritical. (“I Love Jesus, I Hate Faggots”)” by “nothing to do with you”. The fact that you when you write sentences like this. How did you, because you believe that you and your and you’ll say he exists outside of time. and i’ll I encourage you to investigate the claim … What other people do with their sex lives has presume to do so makes me angry in the same “God” (a word I don’t understand) send “Jesus” family know something that is unknowable. say, ‘how do you know?’ and make a whole lot of I just thought you might be interested to of Jesus rather than reject it based on “2. The idea that the Bible is our best source nothing to do with you. Nothing to do with way that if someone tried to pass laws saying (a dead cult leader from dark-ages Palestine) You have been convinced that one of thousands points which you - whilst dressing your reply in know that it did have an impact… the Christians who seem to believe in of moral guidance is laughable. (“The Good the church. Nothing to do with me. Nothing to Christians have limited rights, I would be to “give us the opportunity to have our sins and thousands of gods created by man over the cheery and charming language - will completely God through blind faith rather than by Book”)… do with a book that you seems to concurrently angry on behalf of Christians. forgiven”? I honestly don’t know what that millennia is the “real” one. And guess what? ignore, and instead continue to deliberately You said I “had faith”, but really I think I researching the claim and evaluating it. The think is both divine and open to interpretation! means. And I’m smarter than you. What gives? It happens to be the one you were bought up to avoid turning your otherwise well-developed was just searching for meaning/truth. And best book that I have read that explains the Came across this book review. The book looks like Nothing to do with any of the fools who preach And if you claim that there is no deity that worship! Wow! What a huge coincidence! brain to anything that genuinely conflicts with you were right, the most convenient ‘truth’ logic behind God and Jesus is in the book a good one for you if you’re interested. their prejudice in your church. defines what is right and wrong then how If we move away from homosexuality being your philosophy. was the one that my extended family had “Mere Christianity” by C.S. Lewis… can you claim that specific human acts are a sin then what is stopping us from making You believe that morality is governed by a convinced themselves was real... http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/ How dare you decide what God thinks is a “sin”? “horrific”. murder or rape or theft right. completely unprovable and very unlikely in a poem i wrote, i say: “science adjusts it’s views Sincerely, badastronomy/2009/04/15/why-evolution- How the hell would you know what God thinks? entity. This makes you largely lost to reasonable based on what’s observed; faith is the denial of I really hope you get a chance to read this Tom is-true/ How dare you look at a homosexual person - a I don’t know. I just can. Weird huh? How do you If you said that to me at my dinner table I would debate. And it means you are not suited to observation so that belief can be preserved”. (even though I still think I sound like a smarter, more educated, more giving, more open, know what’s right and wrong? Do you always ask you to leave. An exercise for you: rather contribute to the forward movement of human twat when I write) because I guess it shows *** tim more loving person than you or your preachers have to refer to what your dark-ages philosophers than spending your email time regurgitating morality. While you sit there with your divine you have faith. that debating stuff with seemingly stubborn thought? Or do you just know? Take some pride standard old church rhetoric, why don’t you “knowledge” of what is right and wrong, the Christians isn’t always all for nothing. Hey Tom!/ Thanks so much for your excellent in your own ability to act morally. answer this for me: why is the above sentence rest of us will roll up our sleeves and get on with in my last email i made the point that people message. You’re quite clearly an extremely fucked? Honestly, give it a bash. Try to think the job of trying to face the challenge of ever- have used the bible to justify horrible acts just as I hope you are well. I saw you in intelligent 16 yr old! You don’t at any point “If God exists, he's a proper cunt. (And he made his followers If nature was the result of a chemical reaction why I think the above sentence is problematic Californication, that was awesome. sound arrogant, and I’m really glad you wrote… and our species has evolved due to natural and reply with your answer. If you do that, I’ll in his image... which might explain why you compared selection and survival of the fittest then what answer again. If you don’t, I’m over and out. “Are you suggesting if God wasn't there, you would kill Tom You seem to be claiming the following: homosexuality to rape.)” gives you the right to tell Hitler that what he “Evolution is a theory that has millions of pieces did was wrong. He may have believed that Is there not something inside you that makes you of evidence to support it. It makes predictions (ie he was killing off weaker forms of our specie. feel angry when injustice is served? I put it to and fuck all over the place? What's wrong with you that there will be transitional fossils in certain What has a crazy Nazi killing people have you that this is the work of God in creating us as dude?” stratum) that constantly, consistently, and *** or your parents and say he or she is committing anything to do with natural selection? That’s a beings in his image. frequently come true. However I have found a a “sin”? What the hell is a “sin” anyway? How completely empty argument. couple of examples of an animal which doesn’t Hey Tim, simplistic and judgmental! Well I put it to you that a Dragon called Grshnid changing human morality in an ever-changing easily fit into this theory. Therefore, a dark-ages A thought on morality for you, and anyone else is doing it. You can’t just substitute an assertion world. text claiming the existence of a magical man- Thanks so much for the reply. Sorry that I The need to divide things into the false who think their doctrine is the source of the stuff: of your original premise to try to bolster your god must be the better explanation.” Mad! Type am the one who takes a long time to reply dichotomy of good and evil should remain the argument. You are so bright that it will be very hard for Occam’s Razor into Wikipedia. even when you are probably a thousand intellectual pursuit of pre-enlightenment adults Morality alters over time. You are the type of you to leave your religion. You work so hard times busier than I am and modern 4 year olds. Christian you are (ie reasonably liberal) because And I know you enjoy having a dig at the at justifying your beliefs that you are probably Even if evolution was not the scientific fact that humans have dragged their religions forward church but I would say that I am not against going to hold them for life. it is, the idea that the Christian explanation of …I feel that it is possible that people may Many of the most horrific human acts in history with them. Slavery, witch-burning, genocide this. existence is its worthy replacement is absolutely have homosexual inclinations naturally have been justified by ill-educated arseholes and a million other terrible human acts have t crazy. Creationism / Intelligent Design does not (occurring without any environmental waving their personal definition of sin. been justified as supported by the bible. (Note I I appreciate that. I imagine it must be very propose any testible theory for the existence of causes in their upbringing) in the same way didn’t say religion caused these acts). The reason hard believing what you believe and not being *** species. It simply looks for tiny cracks, peers into that people may have the inclination to lie Humans created God. Humans created the those things are now seen as immoral is because outraged by people insulting it. them, and yells. “Look! Look! I can see God!”. or cheat etc. Bible. Humans created our laws. Humans are humankind has advanced. God has nothing to hey tim I do not think that having an attraction the source of war and hatred. Humans are the do with it. A prediction: in 50 years, Christians How can you tell people not to be stoked that you did send it! Please, Tom, look carefully into the information towards the same sex in and of itself is wrong source of love and giving. Humans are the will not accept prejudice against homosexuals judgemental when you yourself are judging hope your baby is getting along well :) you are being fed… The vast, vast majority of but rather acting upon this inclination source of morality. If you need a book to tell you and will look back at your generation as the church and claiming to know that what scientists accept evolution as fact… and pretty becomes sin. This is the same as any other what is right, then I am sad for you. Are you misguided and embarrassing. You think all those they do is wrong. just quickly i want you to know that i don’t much the only ones who don’t are Christians sin. I hope this does not mean that you reject suggesting if God wasn’t there, you would kill old Christians were wrong with their prejudices have a moral opinion on a persons sexuality. and are therefore not thinking scientifically. me as a person… and fuck all over the place? What’s wrong with against black people and women and Muslims, I don’t know. It’s complicated. I don’t know if people were given free choice. people can be There are, of course, hotly debated topics within you dude? but you think your interpretation of God’s word I’m right. But I use my brain, I look at history, homosexual and heterosexual and shouldn’t evolutionary science... this is what makes science One thing that really confuses me is the is spot-on? You sure Tom? You sure you haven’t and I try to be a good person. Part of being a be treated differently. thats what jesus did. different from faith: it is constantly challenging way that people who are atheists talk about Sorry mate. I don’t reject you “as a person”. seriously fucked up? I’d hate to be in your shoes good person for me is being angry at prejudice. he hung out with the prostitutes and tax and improving itself. morals. I would love to talk for longer about I don’t even know you. And I’m sure you’re a - you must be scared shitless of judgement day. Just like part of being a Christian for you is collectors (hated in that time period) rather this point! I do not understand how people nice guy, but you’ve been taught bad stuff and supporting prejudice. than the religious leaders. however all i say is I could go on for much much longer about why can believe that we were created in some it gives me the shits. As you should know from The simple answer to complex moral questions that there is a god, he would be a bit angry Christianity is intellectually problematic, but chemical reaction… If we are only these my material. is to invoke God. And if you want simplicity, 8 Art by Stephanie Barahona. 9 perspective perspective

Empowering Women Behind Bars BREAKING NEWS: Rebecca Wong talks with Kat Armstrong, founder of the Women in Prison Advocacy Network Coffees Out, Iced Coffees In, Baby.

HS: Can you tell me a bit about yourself order that “if you don’t do this strip search you how many times I was told that. But to get up, when to eat, you get locked in Aaron Chen knows what’s up. and how you became involved in women’s you will be charged” with an internal gaol then there were other officers who then your cell at 3:30 in the afternoon, every advocacy? charge and her still saying ‘no, I do not took me aside when I started my law prisoner except in minimum security. So f you actually are at one with this But is it as good as a classic coffee? Yes. I The first time I had this was at The House me but the whole time I was too distracted KA: I spent 10 years myself in prison, want to do this’, and then officers holding degree, and were just like “Well done, you’re not empowered, you’re not given world you will have a total realisation actually strongly believe that coffee on ice is in Chippendale. I saw it on the menu and thinking about how it cost $6 and had less and whilst I was in prison I saw many her down and ripping her clothes off her good on you”. any responsibility whatsoever. So say Ithat the weather is getting warmer. Yes, better than hot coffee. Like the level of ice simply could not resist throwing down liquid than I expected. injustices occurring to and around the anyway. Or women being told that a video you’ve been in there for 6 months, and summer is upon us! It is actually so hot actually makes it so smooth on the palate some of the beverage between my lil’ lips. women. I wanted to start an organisation camera is going to be used for a further HS: are there ways in which women’s you’ve lost your house, you’ve lost every that when I was riding in an Uber which (your tongue). It feels fun and adventurous If you go there you will notice that all the There you have it, once again the game is that actually advocated and supported correctional centre officers’ training in experiences of prison differ from men’s? piece of clothing, you’ve lost your children, had all leather seats and my back got really and I impressed so many people at the big baristas are so cool and give each other changed. Have a good summer and don’t to empower women, to become the best this procedure. And so you have 10 or KA: The biggest one is this. 60-70% of and you get out with basically the clothes sweaty and the driver saw me and I don’t café for many weeks and especially the big hi fives… REGULARLY. So please go get sunburnt or kicked in the shin when that they could be. I came from a very 11 women standing in a line, fully naked, women who go to prison are mothers, on your back that you were arrested in and think I got 5 stars for the experience. This man at the café who is angry looking and wearing your best hat or something similar you are kicking around a Wahu at the dysfunctional family. I had very young with a video camera going up behind primary caregivers for their children. little or no money, not knowing where is not the only implication of the heat. I’m scared of. They were talking about it otherwise you will feel intimidated. And beach. parents, my mother was 17 when she gave those women, some of those women being And 50% of those women are not even you’re going to sleep that night, and to Yes, coffees are out and iced coffees are in. for so long that after they stopped talking please don’t tell them I sent you because birth to me and my father was 19, and they asked to spread their legs, and the video convicted of an offence, but they’re refused survive on a $296 crisis payment cheque See there’s nothing like a hot flatty to get about it I just felt empty and little. That it could ruin my reputation if you are not already had my sister who was 18 months camera getting down and shooting up bail. They lose their children, who quite that you get when you’re released plus two peak pit moisture on a summer’s day. The time I ordered a soy flat white, chuck it on cool or a nerd or just one of the worst older than me, so babies having babies. at the woman’s vagina. And the women, often go into foster care, they lose their weeks, how can women possibly do that? greatest cafés are all chucking your lattes ice barista. However, nowadays I can only jocks. When I started drinking the long My father was a Vietnam veteran, and so No wonder it’s almost 50% of all women on ice now. No, I’m not talking sugary drink long blacks but still on ice because blacks for my diet (because I’m making for the first few years of my life he was that are released return to prison within a cold coffee a la Barista Bros. I’m talking my friend Sam is making me lose 7 kg for the greatest art), I did it at this café away at war. He was conscripted, so he had 2 year period. your morning coffee on bricks of frozen a big comedy show we are doing. In it I opposite Redfern station with the “No no choice. When my father got back from water, capiche? Now don’t get me wrong have to crowd surf and in the trial runs Wi-fi” sign. Their coffees are chill but their Vietnam, we moved to Newcastle. For the HS: What kind of work does WIPAN I’ll smash a Big M or Dare any week of I was much too dense and heavy for the signs are nil. You can also get a cold drip first say 10-11 years of my life, it was filled do? the year but it really is a sometimes drink. feeble audience. but honestly I don’t really know what that with domestic violence, alcohol addiction, KA: WIPAN was created in 2007-08 to is. One time a lady tried to explain it to and abuse. And then my parents separated advance the wellbeing and prospects of Art by Johanna Roberts when I was 11 or 12, and I moved in with women affected by the criminal justice my mother and left my father. By the time system. Our one on one mentoring I was 15-16, I began to self-medicate on service is where we recruit and train a illegal substances—marijuana, speed, and variety and diverse aray of women from then heroin, and by the time I was 17-18, the community. We then match them to I was addicted to heroin, because I hadn’t women either just arrested or sitting in had the support, counselling or nurturing prison or just released from prison to be as to my dysfunctional upbringing. I mentored by these women, to walk beside ended up in the CJS as a 19-year-old them and guide them in whatever area of single mother with a 1-year-old daughter. before that occurring, were asked to sign house, they lose all their belongings, and need or support they direct. And that can a consent form, but without the details so the whole family unit breaks down. be helping getting her children restored, HS: Obviously you were failed by the of what would actually occur in practice. The majority of men that go to prison, helping getting a house, helping getting police and by the government, do you And also with underlying threats which have a wife or a girlfriend or a partner, into education that will one day enable think there was anything they could of course were not written in the consent who maintains the family home and the her to become employed, helping her get have done to intervene in your family form, that if you didn’t participate in this, children, and visits them in prison every volunteer work so that she’s got something situation? this could affect your classification of week. on her CV to say that she’s had some KA: Back then, domestic violence was a getting into a lower security prison. practical experience in an area, helping her very not talked about incident. And police HS: Do you think the prison system go to court and against a DV partner in weren’t trained to respond and/or deal with HS: If there are female prison guards, do adequately supports women who wish to AVO problems, helping with debt issues it correctly. And so a lot of the time, when you think that’s less likely to happen? pursue education? that women are often released with. they’d come, they’d take my mother to one KA: Absolutely not. So back in the late 80s KA: When I was in prison, there was side and my father to the other side, and early 90s, it was predominantly women greater budgets for education and HS: Do political considerations play a my dad would assure them that “yeah it’s officers, with maybe a quarter or a fifth men programs in prison, both for men and big part in policy decisions? alright, we can sort it out”, and then they’d officers. Today, it’s sometimes 60-40 men women. Over the last 12 years, those KA: Absolutely. But the bottom line is that take his word on that and leave. So yes, I to women, so regardless whether those are budgets have continually been reduced. As women are coming back to our community. do think the police failed my mother and men or female officers, depending on the of April this year, there was not one woman The second bottom line is this—the cost us children. DOCS were never called, they culture, and the values and judgment of in Silverwater Women’s Correctional effectiveness of incarcerating a woman were never involved, and I think it came those officers, it’s irrespective of gender. Centre doing full-time education. If you and not rehabilitating her or addressing down to basically lack of training. And want to do full-time education, your her drug and alcohol addiction or her some of those police themselves having HS: Is that a cultural thing, or is it weekly wage is between $24-32 a week. If trauma and just getting her out and she the very same attitudes of my father that individuals who abuse their power over you choose to go and work in a corrective goes straight back to the drug and alcohol ‘oh if your wife lies or doesn’t do the right others? services industry, you can make up to $65. because she hasn’t got the employment, thing, she should get a slap up the side of KA: The reality is the majority of officers So given 95% of the women rely wholly education and/or the counselling for the the head’. in correctional services, and particularly and solely on their prison wage, there’s no trauma as to why she started offending in long term ones, after seeing so many of way they are going to go and do full-time the first place, then we will continue to HS: What kinds of injustices did you see the same people come in and out, come in education. have an unsafe community, and she will in prison? and out, they form a major judgment and continue to commit crime, and therefore KA: Things like giving a woman a direct bias—they just believe this person is just a HS: Are there skills that people don’t continue to cost taxpayers and the order to do a strip search, her refusing to hopeless druggy. “Oh Kat you’ve been in have or lose during their time in prison, government far more money than what do that strip search because she’s either jail 3 times now, you’re a habitual criminal that then makes it harder for them to it would be if we stand beside her and menstruating or she feels uncomfortable you’re a serial recidivist, you’re an addict, adjust to life after coming out? empower her instead. because she’s a victim of sexual assault, and and you’ll either die or keep coming back KA: You have no access to any money, Illustration by Bryant Apolonio then her being given what’s called a direct in for the rest of your life—I couldn’t tell no budgetting classes. You’re told when 10 11 arts & culture Cardboard Crack Your Own Dom Ellis on Magic: The Gathering and chasing dragons.

omewhere around the ninth and is all about style. He wants his deck to final round of day one of the Sydney be centred around synergy and panache, Sense of Place SGrand Prix (GP), the largest event on the and while he might not always win, as Australian Magic: The Gathering calendar, one commenter describes: for Johnny, Andy Mason on connecting to country on one’s own terms. my competitor, a large bearded man, told “Magic is self-expression”. For Spike, by me how about he’d lost four and won four comparison, it’s all about competition any white people are surprised “experiences on both sides of the fence” have For her, education has facilitated not only a For Nathan, the sense of community with of his eight games thus far. and glory, and Magic’s just like any other when they find out that the biggest meant he can engage politically. “spiritual and cultural engagement with the other young Aboriginal people in Sydney sport. The Spikes of the world have made MAboriginal community in the country is in local community”, but an “ethical and social has also been key to his connection to “I haven’t been going well, and I’ve pretty Magic into the competitive global game it Sydney. Media coverage of Aboriginal issues Although Sydney has been great in some engagement with Aboriginal Australia as Aboriginal culture––he says “I maintain my upset about it.” is today. tends to focus on remote areas, and if that’s ways for Kyol, who is now the President of a whole”. She has been connecting with connection through my relationships with your only source of information you could be the Sydney Uni SRC and has been at the her own Bundjalung heritage through a people around me.” This is something which He was simultaneously shuffling his deck, These three profiles quite aptly characterise forgiven for thinking that most Aboriginal forefront of Aboriginal activism in the city, language program offered at a local TAFE, the other interviewees shared as well–– preparing for our game. the game as I have learnt it from my people live in the bush. In fact 70% of he also shares concern about the potential for and her PhD in Aboriginal literature has also Alison described feeling part of a “diaspora three-month crash course. While the Aboriginal people live in urban centres. dislocation from his culture and community, allowed her to connect with communities of sorts” where “although our experiences are “Up until I heard my seven year old son formats: constructed and limited. The player pool. Luckily, the two players I went game certainly lacks diversity in the most saying he has “had to relearn a lot of things”. from around the country. diverse, having that commonality is a strong won his first game (after losing seven in former requires players to collect cards and with (a sibling and a friend) both cashed meaningful sense, its players all love the White society is often fixated on demanding His advice to other young Aboriginal binding element”. a row) … Now I’m over the moon—just pre-build decks, while the latter involves out, making the top 50 in their first ever game for so many different reasons, be it an that Aboriginal people demonstrate their people moving to the city was to take those Nathan is also a Sydney Uni SRC Indigenous happy to be here.” building a deck on the spot using semi- GPs and scoring around $800 and $500 appreciation of the subtleties of land art or cultural authenticity according to colonial opportunities, but to “make sure that you Officer, who identifies as coming from Despite this diversity, many white people randomised assortment of cards given to respectively.We learnt a little later on that a drive to be the best, and that’s kinda great. standards of traditional-ness. Although don’t lose contact with your culture”. Biripi country near Taree but who feels that remain fixated on a narrow, stereotypical He told me that this year was the first you on the day. My personal preference they were only a few places off qualifying the maintenance and revival of traditional “home has always been a bit of a moveable conception of Aboriginal people. Such time in 20 years that he’d played Magic is limited, largely because of its financial for the pro tour and scoring free flights to The Sydney GP, the culmination of my cultural practices are very important for Georgia, one of the Indigenous Officers at competitively, having dug up cards that sustainability (what you pay to buy in to Madrid. three months of training, is the crème de many Aboriginal communities, and should the Sydney Uni SRC, identifies as a Gadigal he bought back in high school. Now games you usually make back from the la crème of competitive Magic events in be fully supported, Aboriginal people woman from the Eora nation. She explained he’s teaching his son to play, taking him cards you win), but both formats share the At twenty-two years old—a year older than NSW, and it saw all of Timmy, Johnny should be given space to assert their cultural how when she describes herself as an “She feels a real tension between wanting to stay connected to up to Sydney for the GP—from their same sort of complex gameplay and high- me—Magic’s appeal is multidimensional, and Spike come together for a celebration identities on their own terms. Aboriginal person, people sometimes expect hometown in New Zealand—to “throw level logic. On a strategic level, Magic’s offering a casual pastime for old-time of the beautiful game, in all its competitive her to be from somewhere else––“they get her community and country, a feeling which manifests as a him in the deep end”. closer to chess than anything else, as every nostalgics and a shot at glory for young, and creative glory. In between the With this in mind, I spoke to five this image of central desert or something move requires short-term and long-term competitive up-and-comers compelled 1000-person main event, and the many Aboriginal students about the challenges like that!” She grew up in Western Sydney, “bodily yearning for home,” and wanting to work in an area As an obligatory summary, Magic is a considerations, and one wrong move can by the dream of a fulltime profession that other side events at the GP, fans lined and opportunities which living in the city and feels that “coming here [the inner city] CCG (collectable card game) which, to cost you the game. involves pretending you’re a ‘planeswalker’ up for signatures from their favourite brings, and the ways in which they navigate and coming to uni has been a spiritual thing which will benefit her people.” make a reductive pop culture comparison, and summoning mythological creatures. Magic artists and uber-fans cosplayed. their sense of cultural identity while living for me.” She pointed out that there are is something like Yu Gi Oh on steroids. Magic is played by over six million people It was one of the most ludicrously over- in the city. still Aboriginal cultural sites like middens, The basic idea is that you generate ‘mana’ worldwide. Close to 15,000 cards have Wizards of the Coast, the geniuses who the-top things I’ve taken part in—a who’s carvings and rock paintings around, as well which is used to summon either creatures been made in its long history, with the created Magic (because wizards make who of the people you probably bullied Alison is a Gomeroi woman from the as natural features, but that “you have to find thing for me” because of moving around notions have their origin in the policing of or other spells to try and drain your most expensive valued around US$30,000. Magic, geddit?), once divvied up Magic in high school—and yet it was kind of Namoi River floodplains in north-western these places amongst high-rise buildings”. growing up, and mostly living on Wiradjuri Aboriginal identity which always formed opponent of life. There are myriad ways The Pro Tour main events—of which players into three, unfortunately mono- picturesque, an intersection of imagination NSW. She moved to Sydney at the age of country in Dubbo. When talking about his a crucial part of the colonial project in to actually do this, ranging from brute there are multiple per year—pay out gendered, ‘psychographic’ profiles who and competition that you don’t really see 17, seeking “education, work, politics, fresh For Georgia, the experiencing of trying to cultural heritage, he said “I’ve always had a Australia. Mick Dodson, former ATSI force (cover the board in creatures and just around $250,000 in prizes. Though largely they called Timmy, Johnny, and Spike. in any other form. starts... [she] relocated for the first one, and reconnect with her cultural heritage has nebulous connection to country, but ever Social Justice Commissioner, argued in “Re keep ‘swinging’ [attacking]); to playing ignored by mainstream media, Magic, at Timmy is your kid-player, the seven-year- stayed for the last three!” For her, Sydney been very difficult. She pointed out that her since I can remember i’ve always known (de)finding Aboriginality” that definitions defensively and waiting for one big spell least in a sporting sense, is the real deal. old upstart introduced to the game by At this point, I forgive you for wanting to presents the opportunity to study law and country “was the first place to be invaded” and understood that I’m Aboriginal.” of identity have been used as a mechanism to do the deed. My trip to Sydney Olympic Park Hall 4 his nostalgic dad. Timmy’s in it for giant beat me up and take my lunch money, but work in law reform, which wouldn’t be and that in the early days “more than ¾ of Nathan expressed frustration at the way that of control, being employed in legislation to for the Sydney GP was fairly unsuccessful. dragons and momentous wins using the I won’t apologise. Magic is about as good possible back on her country. the Gadigal people were wiped out.” Despite outsiders can sometimes have a pre-formed police all aspects of Aboriginal people’s lives. Magic is usually played in one of two basic I barely cracked the top 200 of the 1000 biggest and brashest possible cards. Johnny as gaming gets. the fact that “a lot of the [cultural knowledge] idea of what it means to be Aboriginal and, Whether these definitions revolved around She feels a real tension between wanting is just lost”, she spoke about some programs that because he isn’t connected to country skin colour or cultural difference, their to stay connected to her community and which are attempting to revive the Eora in the ways they expect, “does that mean main purpose was to affirm the inferiority country, a feeling which manifests as a language and cultural practices, and was I’m not as Aboriginal [to them]?” His of Aboriginal people and justify their “bodily yearning for home,” and wanting to optimistic about the future. connection to his Aboriginality has come subjugation at the hands of settler society. Paint the Town Zed work in an area which will benefit her people. about not mainly through his connection to Dodson urged that we move beyond such She cautioned that while the city might be She gets frustrated at how “I don’t meet his country, but through his experiences of definitions, and that Aboriginal people be seen as a “hive of activity and opportunity”, [white people’s] expectations of an community, family and art. given space to define their own senses of Yitzi Tuvel fought his way through Zedtown. her country “has so much more, and it’s Aboriginal person” because she is fair- cultural identity. crucial that those who leave for education skinned and hasn’t been able to learn much he horde is behind us. We sprint fascinating to watch the nervous cycles of added to the somber weight of the valiant mission, and became enveloped in surging end up back there.” of her culture. In this environment, she feels past some parked cars and two of the peace and war roll on between the Golden charges and narrow escapes. crowds. And I got to shoot the greatest that “I just have to know within myself and creaturesT leap out. I weave to the right. Sands and their nefarious foes. zombie of all, James Wilson. She’s seeking a career in law and academia, within my family who I am.”. Everything is slow now. I fire twice, and one Zedtown was a roaring good time. I but laments that “funding for legal aid, goes down. My gun is dry. I switch weapons The immersive nature of the game drew forged new friendships, failed a diplomatic Live in faith, die in glory. elitism and inflexibility in the academy” Evelyn identifies broadly as a Koori woman, clumsily, fumbling to get the barrel pointing in the players, and gave the battles and would make it impossible to have that career as her family background contains both at the remaining enemy. The thing flinches. intrigues which unfolded a sense of moral back home. As a result Alison has built a life Bundjalung and Dharawal heritage. She Shayma shoots it in the back. and dramatic weight. Several times I for herself in Sydney, and feels “stuck in this has lived all her life on Dharug land on experienced the bodily sensation of being loop” between “two beautiful homes... many the Hawkesbury river, and her family’s This is Zedtown, the world’s biggest present at a truly significant event: the hundreds of kilometres apart”. connection with local elders has been zombie survival game. Gameplay sprawls betrayal and capture of Lieutenant Atlas, crucial to her sense of cultural identity. The over much of the Sydney University the surrender of the perfidious Red Earth Kyol shared these feelings of “living in two Hawkesbury was the site of devastating campus, with important gameplay hubs in Raiders to the mighty Golden Sands, worlds...speaking two different languages.” frontier violence and massacres of Aboriginal Holme, Carslaw, Physics, and Manning. the fall of the Prophet, the massacre of Kyol is also from the Gomeroi nation, and people. Evelyn talked about how the Dharug Over 700 players competed this year, and Physics Road. These are memories I will grew up in the small town of Werris Creek. community is now “reclaiming sacred the overarching goal was a simple one: hold dear, and I daresay they will be spoke Kyol’s connection to his Gomeroi people and sites” to affirm their cultural relationship don’t get bit. Along the way, missions and of in taverns for years to come. country is extremely important to him, as is with the land, and also highlighted “a real side-quests and a host of NPCs added a “sticking together with other Blackfellas” by push to acknowledge that terribly painful welcome sense of purpose. A new game Interspersed between these terrific identifying broadly as Aboriginal. history.” She stressed that her identity can mechanic was introduced this time around, thunder claps was a heavy silence. In it, be a “flexible, hybrid kind of process” given with players being sorted into one of three I felt the sluggish weariness of battle, Kyol moved to Sydney eight years ago to these complexities, but that culturally and factions at the start of the game. Each and the unique exhaustion that fills one’s make use of a scholarship to a private school, spiritually “it’s important to pay respects faction had its own base, its own banner, limbs after hours of constant alertness. and feels this opportunity has allowed him to the land I’ve grown up on as well as the and its own non-player characters. It was The fatigue stretched out the hours, and “to get the messages that are important country I’m from”. to me and my culture out there”. Kyol’s Art by Zita Walker 12 13 blankets and tents. As we leave that night checkpoints, except in lieu of a badge it at Skala Sikamineas. The EU and Greece playbook. At Pipka, they can offer tea to we see families sleeping by the road, burning was just the white skin on the palms of our had struck some kind of deal with Turkish their guests, develop in-jokes, go for swims, The Strange and Unexpected plastic to keep warm, some without blankets hands. A ‘white pass’. law enforcement to stop the boats. It was paint murals, choose what they eat. out in the cold. After seeing this, we decided then I realised that they effectively allow the to stay on and help how we could. Sometimes, the riot police would pull out boat traffic, yet refuse to offer safe passage to Amir, a volunteer from Oldham4Refugees, deter more Muslim and Arabic people from an ad hoc community group, puts it well in Ways My Beach Holiday Intermingled entering the EU. A few days after Tsipras an anecdote he shared as we packed boxes. “I might have been on the same island as the refugees, left, Jason met a mother whose 8 month “Most of these people are coming in on old baby had accidentally been thrown into boats looking real fly you know, they look but ultimately, I’m on a beach holiday, and they’re in a the ocean as refugees desperately threw bags good, they got good style,” he says. “Then With An International Humanitarian Crisis overboard to save a sinking boat. The cost of they land, they go into the clothing donation humanitarian crisis.” that deterrence would be too high even if it tents at Skala Sikamineas, and they change Scenes from Clodagh Schofield’sexperience of the European refugee crisis. was just this one child, but thousands have out of their wet clothes. They come out in drowned in the Aegean this year alone. mismatched, stained, clothes that don’t fit for days at a time, replacing themselves them well and there it is. They’re refugees Refugee camps on Lesbos are racially with Afghani men armed with tent poles The intensity, chaos, and horror of the now”. segregated. Kara Teppe is for Syrians, and is which they’d use to whip other refugees who work we were doing often left us confused, relatively well resourced; Save the Children push or stray from the queue. One day, a overwhelmed and despondent. To take a On my last night at Camp Moria, I met provide indoor areas for breastfeeding and volunteer, a black man from London with a few hours out from the hectic, dirty mess Omir from Damascus. We’re roughly the kids play, and multiple meals a day. Everyone broken leg and crutches, was walking up the of Camp Moria, Grills and I visited Camp same age, and he’s definitely cooler than me. else goes to Camp Moria, which gets food hill to the processing centre. The Afghani Pipka, a summer camp turned anarchist- It’s been a massive day of having desperate sometimes, and receives little help from proxy cop started lashing him with the tent collective-run refugee camp for people who people scream at us in Arabic, Urdu, and large aid organisations. Community groups pole, screaming “NO! NO! SAF!” We learnt are disabled or vulnerable. It is quiet, full of Farsi, calling for baby formula, shoes, and unaffiliated volunteers fill the void with a few words of different languages at the pretty trees, and the only sounds are children blankets, medicine, and I’m sitting in the patchy, ad hoc assistance. camp, but the one which will stick with me cackling away and the gentle wash of waves dirt sharing a cigarette with him. is saf, Arabic for ‘queue!’. in the distance. It’s a utopic vision of what a On Lesbos, untrained volunteers such as refugee camp should be. Some people from “Can I ask you, why are you doing this?” he myself are pulling babies out of the ocean, The next day at the beach we worked for Syria and Palestine invited us to share tea said. The question makes me uncomfortable attempting to respond to refugees begging hours clearing a field for a new camp for with them outside their neat cabins. I was because I don’t want to act like a shitty white for advice on European immigration law, overnight boat arrivals. Although I was hot, eating plain brown rice out of a bowl after saviour voluntourist. rills, Jason, and I came to Lesbos geopolitics, and I felt minutes of my precious European countries to his destination, *** and assisting people with serious medical I found it hard to imagine washing off my 9 hours working without food, and smiled with the primary purpose of relaxing, time with this special person slipping away Belgium, in a way not totally unlike the way conditions (triple bypass heart surgery sweat and swimming out into the water. I at them in a way I imagine, in retrospect, “Well, I think that the only reason I can Gcouchsurfing with some Greek students, like water I might hold in cupped hands. I we travel. Later that night, we were taking a walk recoverees, type two diabetics whose insulin realised later that in my head, the water looked a little deranged. afford to is because Western powers have bumming around the beach, and recovering was so confused. I was hitting on him. Our through a park in Chios and we stumbled had been thrown overboard, car crash refugee boats plough through and sink in been meddling in the Middle East for their from the collective stomach bug we picked eyes were locked. He’s beautiful. The engine Even though I’ve worked, eaten, drunk across our first refugee camp. The UNHCR victims). is not the same water I swim in for leisure. “Thanks, we’d love to.” Good save Grills. own economic gain,” I say. “I think I’m only up somewhere between Montenegro and broke when they were halfway across the and danced with refugees in Australia, the tents I’d only seen in documentaries about There’s an odd disconnect at Lesbos— as lucky as I am because other people have Macedonia. water where 3100 people have drowned this narrative in my mind when I think of asylum Sudan loomed out of nowhere, sandwiched We arrived at Camp Moria with just our business is booming but they’ve almost After we had been chatting for a while, a been disadvantaged. It’s my responsibility to year alone. He likes to swim and hike and seekers on the move is of victims, fleeing, between a marble fountain, a tourist backpacker’s hiking boots and daypacks. never seen fewer tourists. The tourist shops Palestinian man (“Moktar, the Mayor of try to give back.” The first time I met a Syrian asylum seeker we promise to visit each other. His family scared, and tragically heroic. Ahmed had restaurant, and street lamps. The rows of Immediately, refugees were coming to us in Lesbos, which for us are a means of island Pipka” the other men joke) cautiously asked I was in Chios, another Greek island. It is still in danger. He put his arm around one day to wait between arriving safely on crappy one skin tents made the park look a with inquiries, and the heavily armed riot hopping, and for richer travellers a place to “Madam, why are you so dirty?” He nods. “That’s definitely true.” caught me unawares. I was wandering me and only me when we took a group the plastic boat from Turkey and catching little like a festival landscape—distinguished police treated us like officials. Nobody tells book cruises, have asylum seekers queueing around the bus station trying to find a cushy photograph. I hoped it was because he liked the ferry to Athens, so he, exactly as I would, mainly by the prayer mats outside each tent. refugees how to get processed, or how to out the door. Life jackets, which for me I looked down at myself. I was disgusting. When other people ask, I say I know they’d patch of lino for my little crew of 3 to sleep. me not just because I was next to him. He’s hitchhiked around Chios swimming and When we got there the camp was empty. The navigate the camp which has led to a number remind me of school camps spent kayaking, My pants are smeared with dirt and do the same for me if I was in trouble. They crossing every border to Austria illegally. A visiting the sites. paths through it were lined with abandoned of scams involving the sale of fake papers. and holidays of watersports, for refugees (probably literally) crap, my arms and legs smile and agree and I know it’s true. But I Two guys walked past me with a huge sack Greek girl gave him a Chios fridge magnet clothes. We found a wall of the disturbing Distributing information is left to random are a means of survival. Our bodies inhabit were cut up with small scratches, and my never will be in that kind of trouble. No one of rubbish. One smiled at me. souvenir––maybe he meets lots of girls and The escalation of the conflict in Syria has children’s art—childish depictions of birds, blow-in volunteers like us. The police laugh the same spaces, the same shops, the same boots, formerly multiple different colours, would let it happen to me. I have a terrible “Do you need some help?” He asked. I shook I’m not special? He’s not replying to my seen millions fleeing from Assad, ISIS, and razor wire, large bloody red splotches of about how they invent a new system with garments, but in my mind we’re almost in are now only one—dust. Our hosts sat in a fear of flying, and after a particularly rough my head. Facebook message, maybe he doesn’t like every new shift, leaving the people in the parallel universes. semi circle around us, poised for the response descent, Grills and I discuss the hypothetical A minute later I realised how cute he was. me? Or maybe he’s smuggling himself across queue lost, infuriated, and downtrodden. to the enquiry, clean, relaxed, and happy. crash in the water. We might end up in Damn, I thought to myself. I think I might the world from a country gone mad. Was my “I felt confused between two narratives, one of boy meets A week after we arrived, Greek Prime lifeboats. We might end up holding onto need some help after all. hair messy? Does he think I’m pretty? Did To get papers, you must present yourself Minister Alexis Tsipras visited Camp Moria “I’ve been at Moria,” I explained. floating shrapnel. But our plight would be he say “hi” because he thought I was cute or girl, the other—Australian meets refugee.” to the UN officials inside a compound with Austrian Chancellor Werner Faymann. international headlines and there would be I followed him downstairs and had a short does he say hi to everyone? surrounded by barbed wire. People with Before his arrival, new fences were installed “Ah,” they all nodded in understanding. “Say huge rescue forces mounted immediately. confusing exchange. He did not work at the disabilities, pregnant people, and small around a tiny section of the camp, gardeners no more. That place is a hellhole!” I might have been on the same island as bus station—he was just helping out—and After he left, I was so bewildered and the rebels. Many stop in Lebanon or in paint and stick figures lying down and not babies are not exempt from the often came in to tidy the area, and a bus full of the refugees, but ultimately, I’m on a beach he didn’t know when it closed. His name emotionally overwhelmed I considered Turkey near the border, but a huge exodus getting up. Near the pictures, a set of house hazardous, always dusty queue. People in clean looking Syrians were brought in from Later, after leaving Pipka, I realise that one holiday, and they’re in a humanitarian crisis. is Ahmed and he’s "half a doctor". Casually taking the Valium I keep for panic attacks of people are also travelling up through keys were discarded, jammed into the wall. the line are subject to tear gas and arbitrary, Kara Teppe. We realised they were creating of the most significant differences between following the script established by many on flights. I felt like someone absolutely Turkey, and crossing into Greece by plastic We stood staring at them for a while, then savage violence from riot police on a fairly a fake camp for the politicians. They had Moria and Pipka is dignity. At Moria, people Donate here to the fund volunteers on the travellers before us, we exchanged names incredible had slipped through my fingers, I boat to the Aegean Islands Chios, Lesbos, Grills and I both moved to Instagram it regular basis. While the lines and process money to weld fences and trim hedges, are transformed from paediatric nurses who ground are using to buy food, medicine, blankets, and asked each other where we were from. felt like the reality of seeking asylum had just and Crete. The migration pathway this has instantaneously. The picture is sandwiched were strict for refugees, as wide eyed twenty but we were calling on our families and run yoga classes on Sundays into someone and transport for refugees on Lesbos:tinyurl. I said Australia, and we agreed it had good smashed into my face. opened up has seen many other refugees between a shot of Jason windsurfing in something white kids we were given free friends to pay for food. This visit coincided who has to beg and scream for food, has to com/lesboscrisis beaches and bad immigration policy, then from Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, Nigeria, Libya, Cesme, Turkey, and Grills dressed as reign. We joked ruefully about showing with a massive decrease in boat traffic, from sleep in the dirt, and is lost in a processing Ahmed told me he was from Syria. He Australians are kept as far as possible from Pakistan, Palestine and even Sri Lanka seek Alexander the Great on the beach. something like a police badge to get through between 20-30 per day to about 5 arriving system like a game with high stakes and no had an hour before his boat to Athens left. refugees. Our primary contact is through asylum via the same route. The plastic boats I wanted him to come travelling with me media, either mainstream discussions of are run by the Turkish mafia, and a single The day before we planned to leave Lesbos instead—he needed to keep going, cross possibly greedy potentially terrorist boat ‘fare’ varies in cost based on the conditions. and continue our holiday, we went to Skala borders illegally, and smuggle himself to people, or advocacy organisations which If conditions are calm, you can pay €2000 Sikamineas to spend a day volunteering Belgium. Still, I asked him to have a drink use pity porn and select narratives to per person. But when the seas are rough and at the spot where the bulk of the refugee with me. He didn’t have time but he did mobilise donations, petition signatures, dangerous, the mafia offers bargain fares boats come in from Turkey. On the hilly, anyway. rally attendees. The Australian government, for poorer refugees, around €400. When hour long drive north, we saw hundreds of wherever possible, shifts people from they reach Greece, the refugees register people walking on the roadside with kids, The fact that he was a refugee changed community processing facilities, to onshore for papers, then go on to Athens, through huge bags, and sometimes no shoes. As things for me. My friends and I were keen detention, to offshore detention. Every layer Macedonia and the Balkans, and usually we passed the beaches, we saw huge heaps to meet and help refugees if we could. All of removal and detachment costs more but on to Northern Europe. The journey often of fluorescent life jackets, and the slashed of a sudden, I felt selfish keeping Ahmed the political leverage there is to gain by takes two to three weeks. When I first heard black plastic mounds of expired boats. to myself. I felt confused between two transforming those seeking asylum from this, I was stumped. Surely one could just The boats don’t stop at night, but the UN narratives, one of boy meets girl, the other— people into numbers, boats, words, bodies, book a couple of bus trips like we had on and Medicine Sans Frontiers buses which Australian meets refugee. Grills and Jason and votes means that it’s worth every cent our adventure through the Balkans. Over transport families do. There aren’t enough sat down, and ten or so of us, Syrians and for the political elite. the time I spent on Lesbos I came to realise buses to save single men the 12 hour walk, Australians, chatted, pushed language that everything they need, I have and take and now, since boat traffic exceeds 80 per day, barriers, added each other on Facebook Ahmed wears scruffy leather boots like us, for granted. All four of my grandparents they have stopped running them at all. The and WhatsApp, and took group selfies. baggy tattered shorts like us, a backpack were Eurozone citizens. Even one quarter of new arrivals are given whatever dry clothes Jason and Grills were keen to demonstrate like us. He’s a student, and he’s successfully the privilege that I have by accident of birth and blankets are available, and women and a nuanced knowledge of Middle Eastern hitched, bussed and walked through 11 could have changed the lives of a family. children are prioritised in the distribution of

14 Illustrations by Alex “Grills” Grilanc. 15 opinion comp opinion comp The 2015 Nuns and Roses Cameron Gooley

was sixteen years old and attending acting somewhat more solemn, I suddenly it; I’m the worst Catholic ever. Why is the Opinion Competition church for the first time in four years. began frowning. “Oh and I’ve been having some impure priest just sitting there stamping his foot? IKneeling on the wooden plank jutting from thoughts,” I said. I couldn’t believe I’d Oh shit! It is traditional for Honi to host an annual opinon competition, open to any and all. This year, with prizes ranging from $150 for highly commended the pew in front of me, I looked around “Well, come then child, step into the just said “impure” but I felt I had to to $1000 for the winner, and the tantalising theme of ‘shame’ to write on, we received more than half of one hundred entries and your offerings did the hall. Apparently I was the town’s only booth.” compromise and find some middle ground “For His mercy endures forever!” I blurted, not disappoint! The competition was judged by Amelia Lester, Executive Editor at the New Yorker. The top four entries are presented here for your person in the 12-60 demographic to show between “butt-fucky” and “extreme Sodom slightly too loudly. perusal: up that morning—so much for being I climbed into the booth only to be and Gamorrah level shit”. inconspicuous. confronted almost immediately with I did my penance sulkily, before walking another Jesus, this one fun sized. I traced “Is that it?” out the door and back home. After the service finished I waited his torso, giggling to myself. Those abs awkwardly by the confessional booth for were definitely ribbed for her pleasure— I sat silently for a moment, and guiltily What was worse: being so ashamed Somewhere Else the priest. I passed the time staring at caricatured pictures of pornographic nuns looked at the mounted figure of Jesus of sleeping with a man that I almost the ceiling. You’d think the town’s only began to roll around in my head. Hearing on the wall. I glanced once again at his confessed it to a priest whom I hadn’t seen Yitz Tuvel Catholic church would be nicer than the the window separating the two halves of mutilated knees. since Year 6; or being too ashamed to even Presbyterian one, but I guess the Vatican’s the booth swing open, I quickly dropped confess in the end anyway? grew up somewhere else. were taught to treat other Jews, all other People hated me. Not just what I said, but are well-meaning. They’re fighting for bank account actually does have a finite my hand. I didn’t particularly like the “Jesus died for our sins right Father?” I Jews, as family. And we were taught to what I was. Where I expected a counter- a more just world. Perhaps we’re all just number of digits. thought of being caught molesting an asked. I decided it was time to take another IMy family home was in Bondi, but we love Israel. argument, I instead was told: “Fuck off, being thin-skinned about it. idol of the Son of God by the Heavenly break from church. The only things that didn’t really live there. We dwelt in our Zionist scum.” My love of Israel was seen An exception to this was an elaborate Father’s Earth-bound proxy. “Well, yes, that’s what we’ve been teaching institution had ever given me were passive own village, hidden from the world. To The very word seems to hang over the as an inexcusable failing in my character. But recently my morose resignation has sculpture of Jesus nailed to the cross above you since year three.” aggressive authority figures, crippling self- everyone else, Bondi Road was a strip of page now, like a fart in polite company. It When I spoke in solidarity with the transformed into a hot indignation. It the altar. My eyes lingered on the bloody “In the name of the Father, the Son, and esteem issues, and an irrational hatred of cafés and restaurants, but to us it was the was never like that when I was a teenager. Palestinian people at an Al-Nakba Day occurred to me that no-one else has to stains over his knees before returning to the Holy Spirit. My last confession was … Shit, okay mate, chill. Anglicans. I already had a mother and path from home to synagogue, and from Israel was a point of pride—a revival of Rally, I was angrily condemned, and told put up with this. Others are not called to his stomach. Someone had definitely gone ah, four years ago?” father to do that anyway, so what did I synagogue to dinner—our own Diagon our ancestral homeland, a fine example I had no business being there (not by account for the crimes of their people or to town on that body. I began to picture I looked at my own knees, hidden under need Catholicism for? Alley. Every Friday night we’d walk of Jewish entrepreneurial spirit, and an anyone at the rally, I should note, but by their faith. If a gang of political activists a sexually repressed nun sculpting his “Was that a question? Or a statement?” cargo pants. The skin was raw and still the same routes in our Sabbath finery, extra country to back in the Olympics. absent students). confronted a Chinese student for the sins abdominals, in some twisted Catholic The priest asked. stained green from grass. Sitting next to seemingly invisible to the world about us. We’d find plenty to argue about when it of China, or a Muslim student for the version of a Mills and Boon novel. Jesus I felt like a human voodoo doll; I came to her politics—the Occupation, the My Jewish friends who are less combative sins of Islam, they would be roundly and “Oh, a statement sir—Father!” I said stained my knees green and they came up Our peculiar piety was weaved into settlers, the Wall—but Israel was always were received with similar suspicion, and rightly brought to task for it. They who are I slapped my wrist and scolded myself— nervously. “So I guess that’s number one. on him red and bloody. everything we did. We went to our own our country, and we loved her. gradually we all stopped being quite so so commendably careful to avoid giving that sort of ‘perverse’ shit was why I was I haven’t been to church or confession for schools and had our own youth groups. I public. One friend of mine started hiding offense to any other minority see no cause attending confession for the first time a while. Ahhhh, also, I caught my brother He may have died for my sins, but he grew up praying in Hebrew, studying in The first time I got into an argument her Star of David necklace whilst at uni. to employ the same respect or caution since primary school anyway. wearing a pair of my underpants so I probably didn’t intend to cover for me Aramaic, and greeting my fellow townsfolk about Israel at university, it seemed like Another stopped correcting people who when dealing with Jews. farted on his pillow.” blowing another boy in my year at the in Yiddish. We were taught to understand the most natural thing in the world, assume he’s South American. We started “Are you alright, son?” local park. the Scripture, and to memorise the Liturgy. something comfortable and familiar. But being invisible again, just like when We are made to feel ashamed for who we The priest stifled a snort with an extremely We were taught the minutiae of religious the difference between the way things we were children—but it didn’t feel so are. We are taught to hide and downplay The priest had flanked me while I was unconvincing cough, while I cringed in “Yes that’s it Father.” I said, before reading practice: how long one must wait between were done at university and the way magical this time. our Judaism. We are reminded, every preoccupied with thoughts of horny my seat. What can I say? I panicked. the Act of Contrition. eating meat and dairy, how far a man may things were done at home quickly became single day, that we grew up somewhere convent sisters. walk with his head uncovered, how much apparent. The feelings of camaraderie and For a long while, I felt like an unfortunate else. “Yeah. Um, I think he got pink eye.” “Give thanks to the Lord for He is good.” wine one needs to drink after reciting a support that I was used to were gone, casualty. There are undoubtedly important “I’m just here for confession Father,” I said, sanctification (answers: six hours, four which was to be expected. But what came things to be said against Israel, I thought, putting on my most dazzling snaggletooth Stop speaking! I counted to three in my Why is it always “He”? How can an cubits, and enough to fill one cheek). We as a shock was the venom that replaced it. and most of the people here who say them smile. Realising that I should probably be head before getting back to the point. omniscient being have a sex? I don’t get

When I imagined keeping it, I assessed As the nurse walked me into the operating an extra membranous layer to the already What it Feels Like to Get an Abortion my personal situation. I was 19, just about theatre, I burst into tears, sobbing like I dense societal stigma that forces women to start a double degree at Sydney Uni. hadn’t since my dog had been attacked to keep quiet about their experiences Tash Gillezeau Completing that was unthinkable with and had her intestines ripped out. I felt and says your body is and will always a newborn. The ‘father’, my boyfriend cold, small. An older female nurse hugged be a source of shame and something to hortly after turning 19, I found out I asset. I’m constantly asking guys to stop of my underwear. My main job back then was looking at the time, lived in England. It was a me and said to another “I think she’s constantly apologize for. was pregnant. The news was particularly staring at my face.) I couldn’t stomach a after three small boys under the age of 5. bleak, isolating narrative—and in no way been holding this in for a long time”. She Sshocking because I’d been taking the pill vodka shot—the mere smell made me Then I started feeling nauseous. I They were adorable and I loved them to matched the quality of life I hope to be held onto my shoulders and asked me in Having an abortion is a very private choice and using condoms, which I considered instantly sick. I dismissed this aversion as dismissed the idea of being pregnant as bits. That afternoon, I walked to work in able to provide the children I one day a gentle voice if I wanted to go through I hope none of my friends have to make. an airtight contraceptive regime. I don’t a consequence of the six months I’d just stupid. To put my mind at ease, I took a a trance. Playing with the kids felt weird choose to have. with it. I nodded. I understood I could But, if they do, my hope is that they can know why or how I got pregnant (well, had of over-zealous alcohol consumption pregnancy test bought from a pharmacy I now I had one growing inside me. change my mind if I wanted to? Yes yes, make it without fear of stigma, shame, or a I know how), but I’ve since learned that in Europe during my gap year. never go to in a public bathroom on my Throughout this whole period, I felt I understood. moralizing other. Abortion will always be the pill has a much lower efficacy rate for way to work. What none of the pregnancy books I intensely disconnected from whatever I a dirty word if women give it that power people like me with Crohn’s disease, an Then I tried to remember when I’d had hadn’t read prepared me for was how hard was doing. I would have lunch with my By the next day the hormones had left my through silence. intestinal disorder that can fuck with your my last period. I couldn’t. Every month, I Although debates on “where life begins” the hormones would hit. I thought about friends, grateful for the distraction, but my body and my head felt clearer. The dreams absorption, amongst other things. have no idea when my period is coming. are important, philosophical questions are children all the time. I dreamt about them. mind was churning away constantly. Even stopped. I bought a bracelet with a tiny No idea. This might contradict images not what you think of when you realize I was teary, feeling every emotion with full now, writing this, my mind disconnects gold peace symbol on it that I would fiddle Early signs didn’t click. I was ravenous of hysterical girls on Sit-Coms being you’re pregnant and don’t want to be. Your impact. It was like an elaborate method- and I rely on casual humour to distance with. I used to wear it every day. all the time. My boobs swelled and all homg imma a day late, but it’s just first response is disbelief. Then “oh, fuck”. acting empathy task into the daily myself from what I was feeling then and friends asked if I’d begun wearing push- something I never tune into until the Followed by disbelief. experiences of pregnant women, except I what I feel now. There’s a difference between privacy and up bras (my chest isn’t exactly my main blood is literally staining yet another pair was actually pregnant. secrecy. Keeping my abortion secret not *** only creates my own sense of shame, it adds 16 17 opinion comp src caseworker help

Coming Out Bald Ask Abe So you want to move out. Tina Huang SRC Caseworker HELP Q&A What should you do?

ou get to decide what to worship.” went back to shaving. I stayed on the star. Sitting in the sterile office surgery I First out of politeness, and then earnestly, Work + Youth Allowance Make sure you are informed about how to — David Foster Wallace bathroom floor for the rest of the night, thought about Roald Dahl’s The Witches. as if I were some sinning Catholic, end a rental agreement. “Y just sitting there, watching as her leg hairs In the film’s pivotal scene, Angelica counting my vitamins like rosary beads, = Student Income Bank My girlfriend was a born again believer circled down the drain. Huston pulls off her wig and transforms praying with each circular pill that my hair in the power of Gillette Venus razors, into a bald, she-devil. This film left me, as would grow back. I used the products as if eager to forget that year where she took It has been about a year since my hair an eight-year-old, terrified of bald women. I actually believed in the power of Head Dear Abe, you are allowed to earn $427 without gender studies and became a contentious started thinning out, first in wisps and I sat in the office wondering how soon and Shoulders. As if $7.99 was a small any reduction in your Youth Allowance. objector to my wax strips. Every Sunday then thick, healthy clumps. Nobody was it would be until I too started to terrify price to pay for salvation. It turns out I am on a Youth Allowance payment and I If you earn less than $427, the left over night Lauretta sat in our bathtub, shaving quite sure why this was happening. My people. that Queer women, even ones going bald, also work a casual job with varying hours. carries over to the following fortnight. her legs and covering cuts with pieces doctor put it down to stress, a diagnosis worship at the altar of patriarchal beauty Sometimes I receive the full payment just For example, if you only earned $147 in of toilet paper. She sacrificed body and which in itself was so stressful it acted A little while after Lauretta found out, standards. under $500, but other times I get much the first fortnight, you will be allowed to blood. The Gillette commercials promised like a self fulfilling prophecy. He told me I decided to tell my family. My mum less than that. I heard that there is some earn $727 ($427 + $300) in the second that shavers would ultimately be rewarded to come back if the hair loss got worse came over immediately. I found her on Recently, my hair started to grow back. sort of banking system that affects the fortnight. This process keeps going with heavenly ogling and cat calls. The and sent me on my way with a pamphlet my doorstep, proselytising about some The hair came through in patches, raw amount of money I get, but I am very until you’ve accumulated a maximum of act of shaving itself however made her featuring bald, middle aged men on the miracle infomercial ointment. My mum and messy, but at least in time for the new confused by all of this. Could you please $10,600. Your Youth Allowance payment irritable. cover. Inside someone had copy pasted didn’t know about Lauretta. She was semester. I stopped letting my mother buy explain why my payments vary? is reduced when you have earned more proud, bald figures like the Dalai Lama determined that my hair loss not impede vitamins and shampoos. I had converted than your Student Income Bank. That Still, even on the cold Sunday night last and the Rock. The pixelated heads her banal plans to find me a good, Asian too much, if not to her faith, then at least Nursing Student is, by 50 cents in the dollar for amounts July, when I told Lauretta that I was going espoused terribly peppy platitudes about boyfriend. My mum put her faith in the to her practices and I was not sure that they between $427 and $512, then by 60 cents bald, she could be found shaving her legs. confidence and success. Coles cosmetics and health aisle, buying were really working for me. Nowadays, the in the dollar for income over $512. If I sat on our bathroom floor staring at vitamins and conditioners and creams. only time I walk into the Coles cosmetics Dear Nursing Student, you are unsure about whether you have my socks, whilst she swore at the razor. I When the doctor first confirmed that I I knew that unlike my mother or any and health aisle is to buy razors. On most been paid the correct amount, gather hadn’t really planned to tell her that night, was losing my hair, the image prospective Asian boyfriends, Lauretta Sunday nights, you can still find Lauretta The banking system you are talking about all your paperwork and talk to an SRC Are you going to stay for the length of When am I considered to have left? especially not whilst she wielded a sharp, which came to mind was didn’t really care about my hair loss. None and I in the bathroom shaving our legs. is Centrelink’s way of keeping track of the Caseworker about it. your agreement? blunt object, but there was something surprisingly not of a of the girls I dated would have. They were You can still find us worshipping Gillette extra money you are earning. It is called You have only completely left your very intimate about watching her shave. It religious leader all uni students who flirted with pixie Venus. the Student Income Bank. Each fortnight Abe Refer to your original contract or lease. It accommodation when the landlord (not felt wrong to keep things from someone or a sports cuts and used phrases like “patriarchal should state an end date. If it is a contract another tenant) has received all copies of all who had let you see them in a bathtub, standards of beauty.” Yet, I used all you should be able to give notice to your of your keys and other door locking devices splattered in goops of Sorbolene, squinting the products my mum landlord equivalent to the frequency that (like swipe cards). You also have to provide at their knees. In the end it wasn’t a very bought me. you pay rent that you are moving out on “vacant possession” which means all of your big deal. Lauretta gave me a hug and then the end date. Sometimes contracts will belongings have been moved out. have a clause about the fee for ending the agreement early. If it is a lease this What if I want to move out and my amount of notice is either 14 days (fixed housemates want to stay? term agreement) or 21 days (continuing agreement). Notice should be in writing. You will need to find a replacement for This does not include text messages and yourself. If you are on the lease or contract may not include email. It is best to send have that changed before you go. If you are this by letter. Allow 4 days extra for mail on the lease, regardless of whether you live to arrive. there, you are legally and financially liable for the condition of the premises. Make What if you want to leave early? sure you keep a copy of the new lease or contract to show that you are no longer on This will usually cost you lots of money. there. If you have a lease agreement you will usually have to pay four or six weeks worth How do I get my bond or deposit back? of rent, depending on what percentage of the agreement you have already completed. After you have moved out take photos to Sometimes you can find someone to take show the condition of the accommodation. When does your your place in the agreement to avoid paying This is to avoid disputes with the landlord’s 110 all of this money. The replacement person assessment of the condition of your student visa run out? has to be a “reasonable” replacement. accommodation after you moved out. The For example, they need to have a similar cost of any repairs or cleaning will come It is your responsibility to ensure that you comply with all your student visa conditions, especially the length of stay allowed under your visa entitlement. capacity to meet rental payments and a out of the bond or deposit. The rest of your You can find out about all the applicable visa conditions and your visa expiry date using the good rental history. bond (leased property) should be returned online service (Visa Entitlement Verification Online – “VEVO”) on the Department of Immigration in the form of a cheque or electronic and Border Protection website. Use this URL: https://online.immi.gov.au/evo/firstParty If you’re under a contract you may need transfer from the Department of Fair When accessing this online service, you will need your passport number and other to pay the equivalent of the rent up to the Trading. Deposits placed on contracted identification details which can be found on the visa grant email sent by the Department. end of the contract. Sometimes you can properties are less regulated. Make sure If you are not sure how to use VEVO or have trouble with this online service, you can get FREE help from the SRC registered migration agent by contacting 9660 5222. find someone to take your place in the you have your receipt to prove that you contract or start a new contract, but that is did pay it in the first place. If there is any Make sure you put the visa expiry date in your calendar and remember to NOT overstay your visa! Overstaying leads to serious legal consequences which in some situations may require you to completely up to the landlord. dispute about getting back this money talk leave Australia immediately and you will not be able to come back again for 3 years. to an SRC Caseworker.

Level 1, Wentworth Bldg, University of Sydney p: 02 9660 5222 | w: src.usyd.edu.au e: [email protected] If you require assistance with an academic appeal, contact the SRC Caseworkers ACN 146 653 143 | MARN 1276171 phone: 9660 5222 or email: [email protected] Suzuki Address 110 *At participating Dealers only src officebearer reports src officebearer reports

These pages belong to the officebearers of the SRC. They are not altered, edited, or changed in any way by the Honi editors. Residential College Officers’ Report Tim Sullivan, Issy Hellig, Will Khun and Laura Webster

Acting President’s Report The University and Campus Infrastructure housing have often cited as a significant this matter. We would like to take this studying at the University of Sydney. team have recently launched an imitative to issue. The SRC has participated for the opportunity to thank them for their work Laura Webster examine the lighting and safety measures past few weeks in campus ‘walks’ to on this issue. As always, don’t hesitate to contact us with around campus, in a bid to increase determine these areas and Western Ave any questions you may have at t a recent Undergraduate Studies another Facebook status about it) than the over a student’s life. Part time study, have not run past 6pm in recent memory campus security and the safety of students. and the somewhat frightening after hours’ On another note, we strongly encourage [email protected] meeting, the Committee approved welfare of its students. The importance of particularly in coursework-heavy degrees which makes most undergraduate study A recurring issue for students who are on trek to St Johns and Sancta Sophia, have all students to take a look at the colleges aA request from the Sydney College of a part time study option for undergraduate such as Arts/Law or Medical Science/ completely inaccessible for prospective campus after dark has been the complete been noted as areas of great concern and websites if they are interested in applying the Arts to remove the option of part students is well documented, yet the Medicine, the option for open part time students who are carers, live with a lack of sufficient lighting, especially on a priority for the University thanks to for 2016 or beyond as each college has time study for an offered honours course. University of Sydney continues to drag study is crucial, as it means students are disability or are working. I know it’s hardly Western Avenue which students who live the work of the SRC President and Vice announced an array of exciting and When the faculty’s representative was behind on this part with faculties such allowed to prioritise and comfortably a shock to most of us that the University in the residential colleges and student President who were very vocal about generous scholarships for students asked why this was necessary given the as Law and Medicine only offering part work around work, health and other is caring less and less about the welfare necessity for part time study as an option time/reduce load study to students with responsibilities over an arbitrary time and wellbeing of its students, but it seems on equity grounds, they the suspension of exceptional circumstances at the Dean’s frame of acceptable course completion. the higher the University rises in the study rates were too high for their liking. discretion. The practise of applying to international ranks of tertiary education, the Dean in and of itself can be incredibly The University of Sydney prides itself the less they are trying to hide it. So there it is. Yet another stark reminder daunting or intimidating for students on being an institution that supports its that we attend a university that is more who require part time study to complete students and gives them ‘flexible study concerned with how they rank in the latest their degree. It gives Deans the power to options’ but a closer look at Senate and international tertiary education poll (yes interpret ‘need’ as they see fit and gives Faculty resolutions reveals this is not Usyd, we get it and there is no need for yet them absolute and unquestionable control the case. In fact, Undergraduate classes General Secretaries’ Report Chiara Angeloni and Max Hall

ince our first meeting at ~6pm on week; fund the Casework Department to staff; and spend more time doing things So we must now board the strike bus and March 4 2013, we have gradually sunk give financial advice; establish a resource than you spend talking about doing ride off to the eternal picket. Farewell Sthrough the Hermann’s lawn to the SRC pool for activists; increase funding to things. Just because a project can’t be friends, comrades and those we lost dungeon. Remarkably, this turned out to collectives; give the Honi editors a well- completed in your term does not mean along the way (Tony, SLS, optimism and be productive. How productive, you ask? deserved pay rise; give a ~more reasonable~ it isn’t worth starting—the SRC needs Vitamin D). amount to ‘the NUS’; and end up with a better long term vision. Students Well, as your General Secretaries we a slight surplus. Throughout the year we would benefit from wider engagement For now but not forever, Unicorn Faction. delivered one of the best orientation had perfect attendance at Executive and with the University policy process, more handbooks in years and worked with Council meetings. In sum, we turned up collaboration between the Executive and SUPRA to produce a brand new and got stuff done. other representatives, and a group of Office publication distributed in the ACCESS Bearers willing to skillshare for a stronger showbags. We brought home the largest To the students who will run the SRC student movement. Many of these things proportional increase in funding of all next year: the easiest way to be an effective have happened this year, and we hope they student organisation this year. We are student representative is to forget your continue to be prioritised for the benefit proud to have used this increase to: factionalism; use the incredible resources of students. expand the Legal Service to five days a available to you, particularly the SRC Wom*n’s Officers’ Report

Subeta Vimalarajah and Xiaoron Shi

What a year! It is a pleasure to write my involvement. You have been the greatest with this project, but we got a great Smith has been, and will continue to be, last Honi Soit report as Wom*n’s Officer. source of support, wisdom and friendship. survey that will continue this important such a rewarding experience. 2015 has undoubtedly been a huge year Julia Readett - not only did you commit conversation on an institutional level. for the Wom*n’s Collective. It has been completely to your year as Wom*n’s And of course, the tampon tax. We did not one of the most difficult, but rewarding Officer, you guided and supported me Our campaign against gendered violence! succeed, but to be on national television years of my life. I have been lucky to through my term (and your honours year!) From the panel at Radical Sex & Consent with the Wom*n’s Collective holding a have so much support from members of as well. You were there when I needed Week, through to the workshop recently giant tampon behind me and to get a the Wom*n’s Collective, who have given intra-Collective grievances resolved, to given by Karen Willis and the money ‘yes’ from a Liberal treasurer, was, to put countless hours of unpaid labour to our answer my questions and to assure me to raised in collaboration with the Sydney it modestly, a moment I will never forget. campaigns and initiatives this year. continue as Wom*n’s Officer, even when I University Law Society (SULS), each considered resigning. event and initiative is something we Activism by it’s nature is thankless, but I The nature of collective organising is should be proud of. want to thank everyone who has worked that there are always too many names to The year has involved too many projects with me this year. I look forward to a name, but there are two people that I must to list, so I will just draw attention to The feminist education workshops! bright future of continuing to smash thank individually: Anna Hush - there the ‘biggest’ ones I’ve been a part of. The Talking to students about intersectional kyriarchy! is not one campaign or initiative I have University sexual harassment and assault feminism and introducing them to figures run this year without your enthusiastic campaign! We are nowhere near finished like Laverne Cox, Stella Young and Zadie 20 supra supra

This page belongs to the officebearers of SUPRA. It is not altered, edited, or changed in any way by the Honi editors. This page belongs to the officebearers of SUPRA. It is not altered, edited, or changed in any way by the Honi editors. Presidential Power: Meet your SUPRA Executive

Christian Jones is the Co-President of SUPRA. Joshua Preece enters the upper echelons of SUPRA to find out The Postgrad Pages what makes him tick and what SUPRA can do for postgrads. PRESENTED BY

JP: What do you study? important that postgrads are aware immensely. I’d highly recommend that of the work we do in their interests. postgrads consider getting involved in Confidentially Raising Your Issues CJ: Master of Public Health SUPRA and student clubs and societies. (Professional Practice). JP: What’s your favourite thing that Student politics has been a transformative and SUPRA Representation SUPRA does for postgrads? and powerful experience for myself and JP: Why did you get involved in SUPRA? I think it’d be great for more students to By Adrian Cardinali, SUPRA Advocacy Coordinator. CJ: SUPRA employs 5 caseworkers to consider joining a political club. CJ: I’ve been a postgrad for a year and advocate for students who need advice on a half, and I’d felt that SUPRA was almost anything! From academic concerns JP: Lastly - favourite on-campus haunt? Earlier in the semester I wrote an article In Semester 2, 2015, we assisted student article. Myself and the whole advocacy In the end what I describe in brief above lacking in visibility on-campus. That’s to financial advice to accommodation about the multidisciplinary nature of representatives to win changes during the team will be providing case examples is a nexus between postgraduate students been something that I’ve been keen on information, our friendly Student Advice CJ: I love Courtyard because it’s super the professional advice and advocacy drafting process of the new Progression and information that will help to defend accessing our services, professional improving this year. For example, talking and Advocacy Service can help you out. close to the SUPRA Office. The pizza is student-friendly conditions in the advocacy staff respectfully meeting to the media, including the SMH and I work pretty closely with them and I amazing and I’m always happy to support Thesis and Examination of Higher Degree you where you are and using a range the ABC, regarding mass-failures of admire the work that they do. USU outlets! Beyond individual casework services, myself Research Policy and related procedures. of disciplinary expertise to meet your postgrads by the Business School. When For example, we are looking to maintain range of needs, and then respecting what fighting against the scrapping of simple JP: Any advice for USyd postgrads? and my team offer briefing and policy support the amount of time students have to we learn from you even more by then extensions, I’ve also sought to have a to elected SUPRA student representatives. comment on examiner reports at certain using that information to confidentially higher visibility campaign by working CJ: Getting involved in on-campus stages of the process, against a move to inform work to help postgraduates more together with the SRC. I think it’s culture will improve your time here significantly cut times in an overdone broadly. In the end it makes for stronger, services provided by SUPRA. The advice and Review for Higher Degree by Research look for efficiencies. more nuanced and better policy than and advocacy services I am employed to Students Policy of the University so that, would otherwise be the case. It means coordinate are and have been over time, for example, assessments must be made We have been assisting student too that every time you come and use staffed by professionals from a range of of adequacy of supervision and facilities representatives through the semester our service you can contribute to a bank backgrounds including law, social work as part of any research student’s APR. to argue for and achieve appropriate of information that benefits the whole Student and psychology as well as activists who The policy complete with these and many have trained up in delivering casework other improvements is likely to be passed Advice & Advocacy services. I argued that the sometimes at the October meeting of the Academic In the end it makes for stronger, more nuanced Service intense and multifaceted nature of the Board. and better policy than would otherwise be study experience and issues faced by for postgraduates postgraduate students was such that a We received details of widespread the case. team of staff working together and from systemic concerns over the conduct SUPRA Student Advice & Advocacy Officers a range of different backgrounds was of coursework assessments in the provision for informal extensions on postgraduate population. What I describe provide a professional and confidential service the best fit for an advocacy service for University’s Business School and, assessments without the requirement above is a slice of what we do over a that is independent of the University. the postgraduate population. What I though the University never conceded for medical or similar documentation. short period of time. I would encourage did not say in the article was, aside from all the concerns we have, we note with postgraduates to use our services knowing Academic areas we can help with During our drop-in times you can see a individual positive results we achieve with satisfaction that increased teacher support We are presently also reviewing a new you are making precisely this kind of include (but are not limited to): SAAO without making an appointment. • Academic appeals Drop-in times are 2-4pm on Mondays, and for students, what contribution might and training, revised language support Professional Placement Policy which will contribution when you contact us. • Show cause & exclusion Tuesdays and Thursdays (please arrive follow for the postgraduate population as arrangements, and improved formative go to the Academic Board at the end • Harassment, discrimination & bullying no later than 3:30pm). a whole from students coming to see us. assessment have all followed from our of October. We are using casework • Special consideration • Academic dishonesty allegations Students are seen by the SAAO on-call complaints — and students are already experience right now to inform changes • Supervision difficulties. for that session in the order they arrive, Beyond individual casework services, telling us they can see the improvement. SUPRA will call for to improve the Your essential guide to writing a thesis, dissertation, so you may have a short wait. treatise or long essay at the University of Sydney. Our Student Advice & Advocacy myself and my team offer briefing and policy for students living with health Officers (SAAOs) also possess a You can contact SUPRA to make policy support to elected SUPRA student We also assisted in the preparation or disability issues of various kinds. It contains tips and ideas on topics such as working wealth of knowledge about the range an appointment at another time or of non-academic welfare and wellbeing to receive advice via email, phone representatives. One of the things we do of a strong and productive SUPRA with your supervisor; researching & writing your or Skype. thesis; submission & examination and looking after issues that can affect postgraduate in that work is to provide de-identified submission in response to the University’s Changes to the Academic Dishonesty students, such as those involving Phone: (02) 9351 3715 examples of issues students present to 2016–2020 strategic planning discussion and Plagiarism in Coursework Policy are yourself throughout the process. It also explains the tenancy/housing, finances, employment, Toll-free: 1800 249 950 mental health and disability. 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This stage of semester and almost four will likely do so in future, there are likely to pass by the end of the year and your Student Services & Amenities Fee. Access via the lift in the Holme Courtyard months into our current Council’s term several serious issues in development your student representatives are rightly (next to Courtyard Restaurant and Bar). of office is a great time to take stock right now. The University’s Graduate engaged in a lively debate about which Our offices are accessible however the of the kind of work that we can get Studies Committee and Academic changes are appropriate, and they are Download The Thesis Guide nearest accessible toilet is on Level 3 of the Holme Building, adjacent to the done in collaboration with your student Board is considering changes to the using case experience to inform their from our website at Holme Courtyard. representatives. PhD examination process as I write this positions. http://supra.net.au/supra_publications.html Never look a gift horse Cryptic Quick Rain is my tears The Garter Press in the butthole By EN By EN The end THE GODSLAYING MOUTHPIECE OF TRUTH RRP 1x Mortal Soul

Why we shouldn’t let AI research Are goats just skinny sheep? This helpful sign tells motorists that develop a sarcastic robot Opinion: Page 6 the road works! Local News: Page 8 Science: Page 14

I Will Not Apologise Seven-year-old Employee Has for The Garter Press Out-of-Office Bubble Gum in Experience Editorial Stomach Only We’re not in accounts any more The thick air of a secret Patagonian Julie Moore, accounts manager at Fletcher rainforest almost expired me. The surgeon Thing STOPPING and Brown Real Estate has wowed friends to whom I was travelling is too reviled to and family with an incredible story of name. He has abandoned nomenclature apparently leaving her office for a time on and responds only to sudden gasps. Watermelon Friday.

I brought with me The Garter’s finest. They Growth “I felt like I was floating just a little bit need me. I needed them. They all enjoyed Get Doctor Lipschitz on the phone above my place of work and was almost the trip, except for Amber Swamp, our looking at my office, without being in my Across 24. Imperative, say, to reverse doom (4) Across Down celebrity correspondent, who was taken by office,” Moore, a mother of two who works 7. Refer, say, to empty ordinal set, not empty topology 26. Sets Doctor Who program (2,4) 7. Return to one’s dwelling (10) 1. Cannabis source; 21d’s mascot (3,5) a python. full time in Greenwich, said to the press. (10) 29. Complex argument with final closed expression (4) 8. A traditional saying (5) 2. Withstand (6) 8. Tones affected part of syllable (5) 31. Spooner’s irrational student-mathematician (4,5) 10. The act of embedding (9) 3. Perceptively (10) My estranged doctor was sure that our team “One moment, I was sitting at my desk 10. It might be standard to create divergence (9) 32. Function symmetric about y-axis with trivial origin 11. Shrub cluster (4) 4. Set on fire (6) was ample for the procedure. My mind, he auditing the expenses of some of our agents 11. Metre’s unit internationally assigned “m” by leaders (5) 12. Made up of diverse elements (6) 5. Acquires through merit (5) insisted, was too physically frail to support and then I felt like I wasn’t confined to the (4) 33. Plans clues craftily for kernels (4,6) 14. Caesar was warned against these (4) 6. To a smaller degree (4) my firey conviction, but with reinforcement chair that I had spent my whole life in. I 12. Be averse to article (6) 15. Act in opposition to an applied force (5) 9. Walk slowly (5) from a handful of loyal supplicants? Why… was darting around the rest of the office 14. Diagram showing 2 + 1 - 6.626E-34 J.s (4) Down 18. A permanent body which deals with a single 13. Semivowels; moves without resistance (6) I could edit forever. block—flying high through newsagents 15. Foreign dialect with 19d removed for expressing 1. Applicable, Atrus’ head and heart admitted, to subject (8,9) 16. Comb’s projections (5) and public bathrooms. It was liberating.” purpose (5) arbitrary symbol (8) 20. Equipment used for welding (12,5) 17. To be on the verge of happening (6) The procedure was exhausting, particularly 18. Upcoming 32a based on 26a for enablers with 2. Average male initially ignored conundrum (6) 22. Good reason; bring about (5) 18. Adherent of Zeno (5) explaining expedience to the others. Her interests include balancing accounts, anaesthetics (7,3,7) 3. Soundtracked? (5,5) 24. Imperial unit of area (4) 19. Subject to too much light (10) HATEBOT was particularly amiable. He filing receipts for accounts, and chasing up 20. Indicator of difference adjusted set’s strain vectors 4. Deduce dy/dx, cancelling out midpoint of negative 26. Tyrant (6) 21. Where you might meet Zplig, Skribblex is pogramed to be so. The surgery went off unpaid accounts. (11,6) four (6) 29. Foundation; number which is raised to a & Atrus (5,3) without a hitch and, having scavenged the 22. Leads to Skribblex cool-headedly writing a vowel 5. Limit without Euler’s second relation (5) power (4) 23. Long weapon for throwing and stabbing most delicious parts of my subservients I While the experience was exceptional, (5) 6. Root for disciplines like mathematics and 31. Word pronounced the same as another (9) (5) return with twice the editorial acumen of Julie has assured The Garter that she isn’t engineering (4) 32. Difference between observed value and actual 25. Markers of short pauses (6) Amanda Huntingslow Mark I—the fervor Sam Rogers, 27, received unlikely news “It’s not hard to imagine a situation reading too much into what happened. 9. Degenerate mathematical rule? (5) value (5) 27. Sherlock or Poirot, for example (6) cortex of Reverend Jeremiah Stone, Lynette after a routine checkup, when her doctor where things didn’t go so well. Maybe the Target 13. Core anatomy: the pharynx denotes a section! (6) 33. Supposition (10) 28. Graph (5) Hutchinson’s profound empathy centre, the discovered that the only thing stopping watermelon seed got there first and grew “It was a taste of what life might be life Minimum four letter words 16. Inverse inverse cos embraced as instrumental and 30. Peak point (4) limbs of various guest editors and columnists, a watermelon seed from growing in her into a long, tall plant that stopped right at after work. I’m not a spiritual person, but Not Grouse: 10 Grouse: 20 Grouser: 30 Grousest: 41 oblique, say (5) all quickly and coolly accessible thanks to tummy was a very old wad of gum that had the top of her tummy and caught the gum it gives me a kind of hope.” 17. Substitutes’ short & long division (6) PERFECT HATEBOT’s vast RAM. stayed in her stomach for ages. and then the gum stuck on the leafs and, 18. Place uniform source in inverted saddle point (5) and, and it stuck her throat up and no food John Fletcher, the company’s CEO, says R O P 19. Now back, before least-squared regression of I farewelled the pilfered corpses of my Rogers says she swallowed the seed at a could get in any more and she couldn’t even that Julie will have a lunch break tomorrow divergence, Zplig? (5,5) comrades with renewed vigor. I have edited barbecue at the weekend, but was unable to put it in her mouth any more.” as well. L A N 21. Pens odes, composes heavy, heavy feet (8) a thousand newspapers since I left the pinpoint when the gum was swallowed, her 23. Western boundary line segment and symbol (5) good doctor and will edit a thousand more gastroenterologist Tim Brownless says that We Know Best, the regulator of old wives’ IN THIS ISSUE: 25. Fuzzy Boolean algebras without a real base in without pause tonight. is reasonable, given it could have been in her tales in Australia, says it’s the sort of near Y Y D Quadrangle (6) tummy for as long as seven years. miss that should remind Australians not to 27. Pascal argument demonstrates real number (6) On the bloody battlefield of the longevity become complacent. “Ogden” Tops List of 28. Places principal points on areas! (5) of print media, it is said that without quality “It’s been so long since I’ve seen a patient Most Popular Boys’ 30. Setter’s after work without endpoints (4) journalists, the fight is foregone. I have with a real watermelon growing in their “You don’t hear about people drowning Names for Tenth taken the best and forcibly unified them. tummy from swallowing a watermelon with a full stomach nowadays,” says Virginia I will win the fight singlehandedly, by any seed, and it’s because the kids remember Curtis, the group’s president, “or having Consecutive Year means necessary. I will drag dissenters the famous line: ‘if you swallow even one hairy palms because of how much they page 17 across hot coals and damned be the readers. single watermelon seed it will grow in your masturbate, because people just don’t do tummy and you’ll explode’. Word of mouth it any more. They got the message. I hope Cayman Islands President This is the way the world ends. Not with a campaigns that target dumb kids are among never to see another crust-filled, curly hair bang, but with an uprising of cyborg editors the most effective ways of raising awareness child as long as I live. The idea sickens me.” Hides Money in Mattress held together with wires and skin. around these issues.” page 28 Further attempts to examine the contents of Amanda Huntingslow Mark II Brownless says that for two pieces of sound Miss Rogers’ stomach were complicated by Volkswagen Passes Executive, Immortal Editor advice to be ignored so fortuitously is a a broken back, the result of her daughter’s Omission Standards miracle. stepping on a crack. page 31 24 Answers available online (really, we mean it) 25 The Garter Press HARD HITTING NEWS Trans Pacific Partnership Celebrated Nigerian Prince Social Outcast by Samoan Queer Community Struggles To Fulfil Enjoys Post- To free love and free trade Pledge To Give Away Shooting Reprieve Almost two hundred family and friends While the Samoa Meteorological Service 99% Of Wealth From Bullying of Kiuga Lavez Tupai and Esther Sulusi had predicted a chance of showers in the Dear sir/madam ENTJs rule, ISFPs drool Sila have gathered in the seaside village afternoon, the skies remained unseasonably district, Salelologa, Samoa, to formalise a clear, and the sun unseasonably bright. His Most Royal Highness, Olatunde Billy McNab, an eighth grader from relationship of nearly ten years. “We thought that someone might be Sarima, was shocked Wednesday to Forrest View Junior High, was reportedly watching out for us,” Sila joked. hear that his attempts to seed the next elated on hearing about a shooting in Tupai (a trans man) and Sila (a trans generation of entrepreneurs via a random neighbouring McInerney, which will woman) have been dating since high The couple refused to address fears that email giveaway of his three-point-six guarantee him at least two week’s reprieve school and officialised their relationship the secrecy of the agreement’s drafting billion dollar fortune has had a less than from being bullied.” in a modest ceremony in a non- might result in policy that was in the best 3% response rate. denominational chapel with a view of the interests of an elite few in industry and The student body—hyperaware that ocean on Saturday afternoon. government only. The Prince, whose immense material descriptions of McInerney’s shooter mirror wealth is gauged in innumerable precious McNab—have been sighted offering him “He has always been there for me,” Sila “We are so happy to be with one another,” stones, oil deposits, and gold bullion, spaces at their lunch tables, saying hello says. “And I hope I have returned the says Tupai. “It’s just a bonus that the state reportedly made attempts to contact to him in the hallway, and pointedly not kindness. I can’t imagine spending my life recognises it. Our friends and family have anyone who would listen, requiring only a throwing his bag from the window of the with anybody else. I just know Kiuga will been so supportive for so long.” small deposit to ensure the transfer would school bus. be a devoted husband.” take place. “He’s just such a nice boy, and so quiet Rankings Reveal State’s Worst “I ask only that they cover the fee for and courteous—you can just tell he’s a real service. I have explained as much, in catch for someone,” said Courtney Sleigh Puppy Schools By NAPLAN Results perhaps broken English, to all those I about McNab, whose awkward gait and have emailed but people seem disinclined niche interests make him a clear target for Spot goes to school and does badly to make a small commitment.” ridicule. She later continued, off the record: In a nail-biting week for dog teachers condemnation of the school. “we’re really just hoping he doesn’t snap.” and dog pupils everywhere, the NSW To add legitimacy to his appeal, The Department of Education has released “We don’t have the resources for textbooks Prince has enlisted the help of a lawyer At time of publishing, the fear had subsided its 2015 rankings of puppy schools on for dogs, or facilities for dogs as is. When who specialises in inheritance, particularly and a stronger more popular student was NAPLAN results. numbers like these come out, budgets of estranged relatives in Spain. seen throwing McNab into a bin. are trimmed and we’re less and less able Phil Garmon, who compiled the list, says to make sure these dogs can make a it’s important that the facts are out there. meaningful contribution. People forget that the dogs here deserve an education as “We know there is a cyclical effect to much as anyone else.” publishing lists like these, but Labradors and Golden Retrievers everywhere must Garmond, though, is less sympathetic. be able to make an informed decision.” “If these dog academies don’t lift their The Greater Western Sydney Public game, it will mean a generation of dogs School for Dogs came in at the bottom incapable of holding down jobs, and of the list, but headmaster Mark drastically behind on literacy, numeracy Pickering says that this should not be a and sitting.” Modern Church Highlights Dated Views The Future is Now and It’s Clean Sleek lines. Reflective surfaces. Touch conservative values.” For example, women screens. It might look like an inner-city are still discouraged from speaking in gallery or artists studio, but in fact it’s the church, but are encouraged to retweet Murray Heights Pentecostal Church, and relevant Biblical passages. These are it’s ultra-modern from a purely aesthetic displayed on multiple screens in the perspective. church’s hall, atrium, and ‘chill room’.

The pastor, Jono, wears a t-shirt and string Architect Sam Weathers was excited bracelets. He’s a skater, an indie music about the new challenge of designing a fan, and a proponent of abstinence-only church. “Normally I’m doing corporate education. He says the church is eternal, offices or function centres – a church is a so it’s not rooted in the past any more than very different kind of place. But obviously the present or future; it’s just the texts, I made it look the same.” His design scholarship and fundamental teachings brief said ‘Fresh, modern, no gargoyles’. which are backwards-looking. It was understood that the only twisted, stony monstrosities spewing hate from “Today everything is online, everything their cruel mouths in this church were is so fast – the challenge is finding new to be occasional guest preachers from the and exciting ways to deliver the same old American South. 26 Parents can’t get you a job in the media? Write* for Honi in 2016

*Also draw, film, talk, code or read lovingly. Apply by November 24 at tiny.cc/honi2016.