Lost and Found Thiel Kafka’s Take Sports Hot Spot Concert With It pg. 4 pg. 6 pg. 2 pg. 5 THE

The student-run newspaper of Thiel College in Greenville, PA Volume 134 IssueTHIELENSIAN 3 Friday, February 27, 2015 Flirty Girl Townhouse heating issues cause rising temps by Emily Trunzo, [email protected] Fitness Some students residing in by Lynsay Girts, the townhouses are frustrated [email protected] with the way the heat is work- On Tuesday, Feb. 10, Flirty ing during this bone-chilling Girl Fitness chair dancing was winter. The issue the residents led by Valen Meade, Mercedez are having is the difference of Quarles, and Sarah Brookes. temperatures between the first This event was hosted by OBC and second floors; while the and was located in the wrestling first floor is very cold, the sec- practice room (the multipurpose ond floor remains uncomfort- room), next to the athletic train- ably warm. er’s office. Each townhouse shares a “At first we thought of doing similar floor plan: four bed- belly dancing or pole dancing rooms, two bathrooms and a but then chair dancing came to joint kitchen and living room. mind. Therefore, Flirty Girl Fit- What the townhouses do not ness! We hoped that this event have in common is heat and would introduce the art of chair comfort during these trying, dancing while giving a great frigid months. The aftermath of recent waves of cold weather workout. Sarah Brooks showed In each room, including the Photo credit: Emily Trunzo us some really cool, sexy moves bathroom, there are vents. If this can present a problem as According to Hannah matters into their own hands. why this problem occurs he while just using something as these vents are shut, this will roommates may have a hard Stoneman, a resident in the They got a space heater for said, “Well heat rises. But it simple as a chair. She taught prevent heat from flowing time agreeing on a comfortable Townhouses, the problem has the room on the first floor and also could be a matter of the a small basic routine that you through. The heating situation temperature. With the door be- been occurring in her house a few fans for the three rooms vents being opened or closed.” can do to Beyoncé’s “Dance for is often just one of many irri- ing on the first floor, the room for “about three months, since upstairs. His advice: report this prob- You,” but then at the end, we had tations. downstairs will usually be no- the weather started getting Even with these makeshift lem to your Resident Assistant some time for free styling,” Me- Each townhouse has con- ticeably colder than the second colder.” fixes, “the second floor still re- (RA), or go straight to your ade said. trol over the thermostat. While floor. Constantly changing the Instead of waiting for Resi- sembles a sauna.” Stoneman Resident Director (RD). If you are looking for a good this is a benefit that many dor- temperature for the person on dence Life to sort out the heat- reports. workout or just a good time, mitory residents would enjoy, the first floor can take a toll on ing problem, Stoneman and Kyle McGranahan works Flirty Girl Fitness offers just the heating system. her roommates decided to take for maintenance. When asked that. “I can say it is a different workout because you are hav- TLC ing fun while working different Career Development strives for new image muscles,” Meade said. “It helps by Hunter Michaelis, [email protected] recognizes with stretching and becoming a The Career Development little more flexible, feeling sexy Center is attempting to change students for while working out, and for peo- its image in order to become ple who do not necessarily have a stronger resource for Thiel academia rhythm to catch on to the beat. students to use. You can just go with the flow of by Keeley Criswell, “We wanted to show this as [email protected] the music.” a place where you can come The Thiel Learning Com- “It was fun, interesting, and and develop that career into mons, TLC, has launched a I thought that it helped break a something you can use,” Mar- new program to recognize couple people out of their shells. tin Black, head of the Center, some of Thiel’s exceptional It is such a good feeling when said. students. The program, titled you feel comfortable in your Black and his associate, Extraordinary Effort Awards, own skin. This fun event showed Nicolette Fenlock, recently aims at rewarding students for some ladies a couple new moves arranged to take students from outstanding contribution to the to just loosen up and feel the Thiel on a trip to New York pursuit of academic excellence freedom of the music expressed City, which played host to as well as active participation through dance moves. Overall, the Business Summit and Ca- in the TLC. It is the brainchild it was such a great vibe,” Mead reer Expo. The event featured of Nancy Katz, TLC academic said. approximately 200 college coach and Supplemental In- The moves are something students from schools like Martin Black and Nicolette Fenlock take a second to pose. struction coordinator. similar to the motions that one Columbia, NYU and Penn photo credit: Hunter Michaelis This program differs from might find on the Flirty Girl Fit- State, with Thiel being the used something the Center The Four-Year Blueprint recent educational graduates. Thiel’s existing students-of- ness website. According to flirti- only small liberal arts school calls the 30-second pitch. It shows everything students can These former students, who the-month program by rec- fication.com, “You watch MTV represented. At the event, teaches students how to make do each year at Thiel in order are now employed teachers, ognizing students who are and VH1. You love the moves, students were able to partake oneself attractive to an em- to fully develop their career. were selected to give their focused on reaching their full the music and the magic of this in networking, and additional ployer in thirty seconds or This includes things like Cen- opinions about career devel- academic potential, despite amazing dance style. The Flirty career development. less, while also telling every- ter-sponsored activities, coun- opment and the importance their involvement in other Girl Fitness program is every- “Companies like JP Mor- thing they need to know. seling sessions with Black and of the Career Development activities and leadership posi- thing you want and more. Our gan Chase, Credit Swiss, Bank The trip, which was or- Fenlock, and Senior Seminars Center. tions on campus. popular, easy to learn dance rou- of America, the big ones, were chestrated during the Black to learn about job searching, “Our success comes from “We want to acknowledge tines provide the perfect com- there,” Black said. “We had and White Weekend, was not to name a few. partnerships with other peo- students who are directly in- bination of cardio and strength the students provide resumes the only large event on the “We needed a four-year ple,” Black said, “not just volved with the Learning training – you will feel like you to them, and some students Center’s radar: “The Four- curriculum that shows [the these panels, but companies Common’s programs and re- are part of a music video rather were pulled in for one-on-one Year Blueprint is a step-by- students] what they need to do like Kuni, Mellon, and may- sources, students who are con- than in a cardio crazy, core chis- interviews with these compa- step process,” Fenlock said. to get a job. Nicolette works be others. We’re going to tributing to the culture of aca- eling, booty toning, arm sculpt- nies. Admissions and Student “It shows students that they with freshmen and sopho- produce that panel four more demic excellence here at Thiel ing workout class.” Life provided the funding to can do things like getting an mores, and I work with ju- times for different areas.” college. We want to focus on “In March for sure we will have make that trip possible.” internship in the second se- niors and seniors,” Black said. academic achievement,” Katz another class of Flirty Girl Fit- In addition to using re- mester of their freshman year. Recently, Fenlcock, who [cont. on pg. 3] said. ness and hope for more people sumes, the students were fa- You can get up to three by the is a Master of Secondary Edu- [cont. on pg. 3] to join us,” Meade, said. miliar with Linked-In, and time you graduate.” cation, put together a panel of Thiel observes Eating Disorder Awareness Week by Liz Carlson, [email protected] This past week, Feb. 23-27, marked the club’s own president, Ivey Shorts, silence due to a fear of being judged. this year’s annual Eating Disorder as well as a week-long candy gram Treatment for these types of disorders Awareness Week national campaign fundraiser. is also very expensive and not readi- to raise awareness for and educate the Of all mental illnesses that exist, ly available, particularly in this area. public about eating disorders. eating disorders are some of the most The closest resources available to help Active Minds, a psychology-based deadly and problematic, yet efforts to with the treatment of eating disorders organization on campus whose goal is help those that suffer from them are are located in Pittsburgh, and they are to eliminate the stigma associated with funded the least. In the United States far from prestigious. This is why we mental disorders, celebrates the one alone, 20 million women and 10 mil- [Active Minds] make such an effort to week set aside for the cause each year lion men suffer from a clinical eating help raise money for NEDA (the Na- by hosting several events and speak- disorder at some point in their life- tional Eating Disorder Association) disorders. from these illnesses and reminding ers. This year’s activities included the time. These are the types of statistics each year. The money that we raise “A lot more people suffer from eat- them that they are not alone and that showing of the documentary “Some- that Active Minds worked hard to ed- helps people that suffer from eating ing disorders than the public realizes,” there is no shame is getting the help day Melissa,” an instant comfort box ucate their fellow students about this disorders receive the necessary treat- Lora Rutherford, vice president of that one needs,” Rutherford said. workshop, a positive body image past week. ment,” Shorts said. She established Active Minds, said. “Active Minds at- Rutherford has worked alongside workshop, two certified speakers from “People with eating disorders suffer Active Minds on Thiel’s campus last tempts to eliminate some of the stigma Shorts over the past two years to help the National Eating Disorder Aware- from a lot of ridicule and ignorance. year and is a very strong supporter of associated with getting help by reach- her organize the events that the club ness Association, one of whom was They more often than not suffer in the education and awareness of eating ing out to students that are suffering hosts. EVENTS & STUDENT LIFE Page 2 Friday, February 27, 2015 THIELENSIAN Thiel Thiel College Happenings Wanna see a movie? Police Blotter STAMM MOVIE PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS... compiled by Liz Carlson, [email protected] compiled by Liz Carlson Friday, Feb. 27 Unbroken: Friday, March 20 and Sunday, March 22 There have been no recorded crimes on campus Speakers: Eating Disorder Awareness Directed by Angelina Jolie, this drama tells the real -life story of Olympic track star between the last edition and now. Week: Louis Zamperini, whose life is changed forever when he survives a plane crash during 4:30-5:30 p.m. in the LHR World War II. Although he survived the initial plane crash, Louis finds out that the ele- Active Minds’ second annual Eating ments of nature are not in his favor. He spends over a month stranded at sea, only to be Disorder Awareness Week presentation will later captured by Japanese enemies as a prisoner of war. He endures constant physical feature National Eating Disorder Associa- abuse by a Japanese prison guard whose only goal is to break Zamperini’s enduring and tion volunteer speakers Katy Mullins and unbroken spirit. Ivey Shorts. They will share their stories and provide information about eating disor- ders.

March 7-15; Spring Break

March 16: Classes Resume

Tuesday, March 17 Global Club Coffee Hour- Tracy Thomp- son: 6:30-7:30 p.m. in Weyer’s Lounge Tracy Thompson will present about Par- aguay and his trip there. Coffee, hot choco- late and baked goods will be provided. Feel Want to advertise your club or free to come and go as your schedule allows during the hour. event?

Speaker Broadcast: Arianna Huffington - Submit an ad or article!!! Articles must be between 350-600 words. co-founder of the Huffington Post: Publication is free for Thiel clubs and activities 7-8:30 p.m. in Bly Hall Arianna Huffington, co-founder and ed- itor-in-chief of The Huffington Post, will Submission Date Publication Date be streaming live as the third in a series of leadership video speaker broadcasts hosted Thurs, Mar 3 Fri, Mar 20 by Sigma Alpha Pi. Thurs Mar 30 Fri, Apr 10 Other Upcoming Events: Thurs, Apr 16 Fri, Apr 24

Wednesday, March 18: If you give us information for your event (Who?, Illusionist Leon Etienne Upcoming Lost and Found concert What?, When?, Where?, and how students can get by Lynsay Girts, [email protected] involved), we can make the ad for you! Just give us the Tuesday, March 24: information 3 days before the submission date! Speaker Matt Roloff from TLC’s Little On Mar. 29, at 7 p.m,. the band LOST AND FOUND will be appearing in concert in the People Big World Lutheran Heritage Room. “This concert is not going to be just any old concert,” said campus pastor Rev. Jayne Articles, ads, and information can be sent to [email protected] Wednesday, March 25: Thompson. Traveling all over the United States for the year of 2015, Thiel College is a Laser Tag in the LHR stop on the map for the LOST AND FOUND Farewell Tour. Musicians Michael Bridges and George Baum are the two men who comprise the band. Some have said that the music of LOST AND FOUND is not easy to describe. Accord- ing to their official website, speedwood.com, “Some have simply labeled it “speedwood” or “acoustic thrash.” Others, upon hearing the unique blend of folk and screaming, played with- out drums or stacks of keyboards, and including the occasional ballad, have just said, “I’ve never heard anything like that before.” One person said the music is, “the intersection of the Ramones and John Denver.” This is, as you might imagine, a relatively deserted intersection.” Their website also says that, “The concerts are a bit like having Michael and George over to your living room for conversation and music more like a dialogue than a presentation. To this day, their concerts include stories of their lives and their travels along with their songs.” “The music is organic and fun, and the lyrics comment on life, faith, travel, friends and rela- tionships.” Bridges and Baum began playing music full time on accident. As the two reflect back on their start-up days, this story that might be expected to be told during their “One Last Time” Farewell Tour, “One concert simply led to another and people heard us and asked us to come back and sing again.” According to their website, “They (Bridges and Baum) have been at it for over ten years during and after college and graduate school. It has never been the mission of LOST AND FOUND to sell out arenas, or to become staples of the radio. It has always been their mission to be honest and natural in concerts, to model a way of being an independent band, and to meet lots of people--communicating with them about faith and life.” This concert is free but $5 gets you a Baum and Bridges autographed gold TC Slinky, a limited supply available. ACADEMICS Page 3 Friday, February 27, 2015 THIELENSIAN Students of the month TLC Extraordinary Effort Awards: March by Dominick DiRienzo, [email protected] cont. from front page Allison Agona, of Warren, Ohio, and Elliott Beach of Spring- Students are nominated balance the academic demands field, Ohio are the students of the month for February 2015. and chosen by TLC staff every of college, Kargbo began em- The Student of the Month award is among the most prestigious month. Each nominated stu- ploying some organization and academic awards Thiel College grants each school year. dent must participate directly study strategies to make himself with the Learning Commons. a successful student. He said This means that the students that he uses a lot of sticky notes must either serve in some ca- to help keep himself organized, pacity or receive TLC services. and remember what he has to do These services include Supple- for each of his classes. He also mental Instruction, Group Peer does most of his studying in the Study, peer tutoring, disability library. services, the Writing Lab, and “The hallway where I live academic coaching. isn’t necessarily the easiest The Learning Commons staff place to study. It can be quite is excited about the Extraor- noisy. I’ve found that I am dinary Effort Awards because able to focus much better when they hope the awards will bring I study in the library,” Kargbo more awareness of the TLC’s said. existence and desire to help stu- Kargbo is proud of his suc- dents. cess and the support he gets “We want to increase aware- from various people at from ness and interest in the Learn- Thiel. ing Commons, and we think “My roommate helps me out this new program is a great way a lot, and helps push me to do Criswell and Kargbo have been selected as the first recipients of Agona and Beach have both been selected as students of the to do that. We’re very excit- well. I use him as motivation the TLC Extraordinary Effort Award. month based on their academic success. ed about the program because because I’ve seen how well he Photo credit: Prof. Nancy Katz Photo: thiel.edu we’re working on rebranding does in his classes,” Kargbo crosse with his friends. She has been an SI leader for 5 [the TLC] as a place that focuses said. Agona is a senior English Beach is a senior history Criswell is a senior from Bed- semester, in both physics and on students reaching their full- “Another person that has re- major specializing in Litera- major who will graduate in ford, PA. Her majors are phys- precalculus. She is an outstand- est academic potential, whether ally helped me succeed is Pro- ture and will graduate in May December 2015 with second- ics and computer science, and ing model of SI leadership,” that be a 4.00 or a 2.50,” Katz fessor Katz. She has given me Katz said. with a minor in Media Com- ary education certification. she has a minor in mathematics. said. so many tips and resources to munications. She has earned When she is not in class, Criswell stays organized by His post-graduation plans in- The first recipients of the help me succeed. Not only does Dean’s List for six semesters she participates in Kappa Mu meticulously recording all of clude pursuing options in both monthly award are Keeley she talk to me about my school and is a member of Sigma Tau Epsilon, the mathematics hon- her class assignments, meet- employment as a high school Criswell and Edward Kargbo. work, she also asks about my Delta international English or society, and the shooting ings, and activities in her plan- teacher and graduate school Kargbo is a sophomore com- personal life which shows that honorary society in which she club. Criswell also works for ner. programs in history to prepare puter science major from Alex- she does care about me and I has served as secretary for two the Thielensian and as the pre- “If it weren’t for my planner, I for opportunities as a college andria, VA. He also plays on think that definitely helped me years. Agona has served as calculus SI leader. During her would forget to do most of my professor. Thiel’s lacrosse team. out a lot. She showed that she the Editor of Art and Publicity free time, she enjoys crochet- homework or go to my meet- He has earned Dean’s List “We chose Edward because believed in me which helped me for the last two issues of The ing, sewing, and a wide variety ings/events. It’s a real life-sav- recognition for seven con- of the significant improvement believe in myself,” Kargbo said. Phoenix, the annual creative of other crafts. er,” Criswell said. in his GPA from one semester to In his free time, Kargbo en- arts magazine produced by secutive semesters, is vice “We chose Keeley because the next,” Katz said. joys going to the gym, playing Thiel’s Chapter of Sigma Tau president for both Kappa of her service to the SI program. After initially struggling to video games, and practicing la- Delta. She has worked closely Delta Pi international honor- with the Warren Family Mis- ary society in education, and sion, a local mission in her Phi Alpha Theta international hometown that serves meals honor society in history, and Career Services works on creating a new image cont. from front page on holidays and works with is a member of Lambda Sig- children of the community. ma, and Les Lauriers honor- Additionally, a trip to Cleve- an interview day in Pittsburgh. of a crash-course on the subject. the information to Admissions.” After graduation she hopes to ary societies. Additionally, he land was organized for career Black and Fenlock are teach- The class is just one of many “We want to show students that travel with her church on mis- is a member of Delta Sigma development a few weeks ago, ing classes on getting the job plans the duo have for the future. they’re not alone in their educa- sion trips overseas or within Phi national social fraternity with Quicken Loans deciding following graduation. For “In the future, I’d like to see tion. We want to meet with grad- the United States. where he serves in the capaci- to host 10 students from Thiel seniors who can’t attend, the additional staff, maybe think uating seniors one more time to “Allison is a young woman ty of both Alumni Awards and for shadowing opportunities. two offer a program known as about a better location,” Black see if there’s anything more we who has grown tremendously Historian Chair. In previous The Science, Technology, En- “Backpack to Briefcase.” It’s a said, “Maybe do with social can do,” Fenlock said. “We offer in her four years at Thiel into years he has held the offices gineering, and Mathematics, or two-day version of the semes- media and increase the number life-long support to all alumni.” a confident and competent of President and Recruitment STEM, programs are getting ter-long program, which is more of partnerships. I’d like to give seeker of knowledge and has a Chair of the fraternity. balanced perspective on life,” “Overall, I would rank El- English professor Dr. Mary liott Beach as one of the best Theresa Hall said. “Allison is all-around students I have had SPRING 2015 dependable, highly involved, at Thiel College,” history de- and participative, both in partment professor and chair class and in Sigma Tau Del- KEEP CALM AND GO TO ta, and simply lights up when Dr. David Buck said. “He fac- she experiences an ‘epiphanic es experiences and challenges moment’ in the classroom as with a positive attitude and SUPPLEMENTAL INSTRUCTION opaque concepts suddenly be- creates an environment where come translucent.” people feel valued.” Agona is the daughter of Na- Beach is the son of William dine Zajaczkowski and Fred and Sarah Beach of Spring- Gardner from Warren, Ohio. field, Ohio. Students who regularly attend SI earn higher final course grades The Thielensian About the than students who do not attend SI regularly. Staff Thielensian

Editor in Chief The Thielensian is Thiel Hunter Michaelis College’s student-run news- paper, funded by the Student Copy Editor Government Association. Our Katie Allgeier mission is to serve the cam- pus community by publishing Layout & Design Editor timely, fair, and relevant news, David DeVivo III sports, feature stories, and oth- er information, and to provide Student Life & Events a lively forum for student ex- pression and the opinion of Editor others on campus. The Thiel- Keeley Criswell ensian encourages letters to the editor of 300 words or less Sports Editor by traditional mail and prefer- Paul Connelly ably by e-mail. Letters must be signed (no pseudonyms, Business Mgr. please) and a phone number Chris Kafka must be provided for verifica- tion. Letters must be free from Staff Writers offensive language, personal Mike Boratyn attacks, obvious errors in fact, Liz Carlson and libelous or potentially li- Kristina Cotton belous statements. Letters are Andrew Denson subject to editing for length and clarity, and we reserve the Contributing Writers right to reject any letter. Guest Trent Keisling columns, letters or other opin- Seth Shidemantle ions expressed in the Thielen- Pat Donner sian are the views of the writer and don’t necessarily reflect Emily Trunzo those of the staff and adviser or the college. Staff Photographers Lynae Jackson Letters may be e-mailed to: Maryanne Elder [email protected] OPINION Page 4 Friday, February 27, 2015 THIELENSIAN Another NFL Combine comes and leaves us with top prospects by Chris Kafka, [email protected] and positional drills. However, third round pick, but got thrown ly benched and released. He is star or appear to lack NFL tal- IQ more than anything. If the coaches and scouts generally into first round conversation now a backup on the Carolina ent. It is easy to look past the linebacker has no gap discipline leave the combine feeling more after the combine (eventually Panthers. tape when a prospect shows or play recognition, he is going confused than satisfied. Why is drafted in the second round by Vontaze Burfict became a physical prowess or fails to im- to run fast in all the wrong plac- that? the ). Former Ar- starter during his rookie sea- press, but the film is where you es and fail to make an impact. Naturally, we are wowed by izona State linebacker Vontaze son and recorded 127 tackles. truly evaluate a player. To look Burfict has shown intelligence a person’s raw strength or speed Burfict was hyped as a poten- During his sophomore cam- at it more deeply with Hill and in playing the gaps to stop the more than the intangibles. tial first round pick before the paign, he had 171 tackles and Burfict, the combine obviously run and be effective in pass When wide receivers run their combine. However, he ran the 3 sacks to earn a spot in the did not impact all of what is re- coverage. He makes up for lack 40 yard dashes, it is easy to buy slowest time among lineback- Pro Bowl. He suffered from quired by their positions. Hill of speed by understanding the into them if they complete it in ers (5.09), bench pressed only injuries this past season and ran well in a straight line, but game (which every position re- less than 4.5 seconds. For ev- 16 reps (fewer than some de- played sparingly. This is just receivers need the ability to run ally needs). ery position really, we have the fensive backs), and struggled one example of how combines routes and have agility more so Physical talents will always mindset that they need to run a to communicate in interviews. have failed to evaluate players, than straight line speed to get be on the radar, but the players certain time in order to be con- He did not even get drafted, but as there have been many more open. who also have the high foot- Another NFL Combine has sidered talented enough to be in he did sign as an undrafted free cases similar to this one. Hill Also, catching the ball with ball IQ and intangibles are the come and gone. This is the the NFL. Former Georgia Tech agent with the Cincinnati Ben- is still young (23) and has time no defenders around you at the ones who generally stay in the time of the year in Indianapo- wide receiver Stephen hill ran gals. What has happened so far to develop, but it does not look combine is a heck of a lot easier league longer. Some athletic lis where rookie prospects are in the sub 4.30s a couple years with these two player’s careers? like he will become a starter. than doing the same thing with specimens can learn the game supposed to cement their status ago, measured at 6’5”, and Hill started off hot with a cou- Not all players with stories a safety about to crush you over at the next level, but it depends or raise their stock even further. drew physical comparisons to ple of touchdowns early before like Burfict succeed by default, the middle. With linebackers, it on if the team wants to take Each prospect is put through a Calvin Johnson Jr. He was orig- getting hurt. However, even but the combine has the abili- is nice to have speed, but you time for him to develop. 40 yard dash, bench press ex- inally regarded as a potential when healthy, he was eventual- ty to make a player seem like a need to have a strong football ercise, broad and long jumps, Why your favorite movie is awful... featuring Romantic Comedies DYI: Cutting Bottles by Andrew Denson, [email protected] by Lynsay Girts, [email protected] ****WARNING: This opinion piece is meant to be offensive and is based off the offensive on- Time: [insert time here] line blog, “Why your favorite team sucks,” on Deadspin. Please do not read if you become easily offended. Cost: $0-5, depending on what materials you already have

What you need: yarn: $3 nail polish remover: $1 lighter: $1 ice cold water: free

1. Fill a pot with ice cold water and set it to the side

Arguably, the two worst romantic comedies: 500 Days of Summer and You’ve Got Mail. 2. Soak the piece of yarn for Photo: amazon.com about ten seconds into your Ac- The Movie(s): What’s Awful: QUICK! What do Jennifer etone nail polish remover The most unrealistic, un- Well, besides what I men- Lopez, Jennifer Aniston, and trustworthy, and overall silly tioned above, the worst part ummm Cameron Diaz have in 3. Take your potent nail pol- attempt at showing romance of these movies literally have common? ish remover yarn and wrap (aka, romantic comedies). nothing to do with the film it- If you answered they are all it around the bottle as many Now, I could have easily tak- self. The awful trailers for the attractive women who repeat- times as you would like but en a different route and picked movies are the worst part. edly play characters that have in the same place. Having the Nicholas Sparks movies, but at They always start with the problems getting men, you are yarn closely together makes for Cut bottles can be used as vases or for a myriad of other proj- least he is smart enough to have generic “HE’S A… SHE’S correct. This by far is most un- a better “cut”. ects. Take a look at Pinterest for some ideas. some sort of story to his books/ A… WHAT WILL HAPPEN realistic part of these movies. Photo credit: picklee.com movies, directors and writers WHEN TWO PEOPLE WHO The creators think that we are 4. Tie the yarn together when of Romantic Comedies liter- ARE SO DIFFERENT... (TI- and cook it for several minutes, all so stupid, that we will liter- you get it wrapped completely ally do not care. They use the TLE OF THE MOVIE)… fol- 6. Once the flame goes out or which should also smooth the ally believe that these very at- around the bottle and in the de- same generic, recycled plot that lowed by some silly one liner a rough 30 seconds goes by, edges… that is if you are want- tractive people are 40 years old sired place that you would like peaked in the 70’s. that is always funnier in the quickly submerge the bottle ing to drink out of your newly and still have not found some- to “cut”. Here is a basic rundown trailer than in the actual movie. NECK FIRST into the pot of made bottle glasses! one to settle down with. BS. of every romcom ever made. Seriously, watch some of these ice water and it should break! I never bought it and neither 5. Using a lighter, hold the “Man meets woman, they hate previews; it’s embarrassing. *Steps 2 & 3 can be flip- should you people. Get some lighter right on the yarn to get each other even though they What’s Also Awful: If successful, be careful of the flopped. I found that soaking ugly people in these movies. it heated up and begin to rotate both think the other is very at- Look at almost any romantic broken glass. Also, be aware the yarn first is easier for place- You will never see someone the bottle in a circle so that the tractive, they go out, shenani- comedy movie, especially ones that some glasses might require ment on the bottle as opposed who looks like me or the ma- whole yarn has contact with gans ensue, some type of argu- with Matthew McConaughey, a little sanding after this pro- to tying the yarn, taking it back jority of the people in this area the flames. Depending on the ment eventually happens, they and its usually a man and a cess due to the sharp edges. But off, soaking it, then putting it portrayed in movies. It’s an un- thickness of the bottle, you hate each other, some sappy woman. What stands out is that something that I have not tried back on but ultimately, it is up fortunate truth. want to keep the fire going for montage, an unrealistic roman- the man is usually trying to get yet is that you can supposedly to you!* Whats Not Awful: as long as you possibly can. tic gesture, happily ever after.” at the woman, but the woman put the bottle in boiling water Nothing. They all suck, there Yeah, because that’s TO- usually has a no-nonsense look is no saving grace. I know I TALLY how things work. on her face and is pushing him usually write about movies These movies would be so away, implying he will have to that I actually enjoy, but if you Question of the day: Why are you here? much better if they ended up try real hard if he wants to end can convince me of one good by Hunter Michaelis, [email protected] committing ritual suicide while up with her. Basically adver- reason to watch any romantic “Harlem Shake” plays in the tising that it’s NEVER that the In my spare time, I like to rest of your days doing some- tirety by your senior year. comedy that isn’t 500 Days of background. That’s a movie I woman wants the man. Also, a watch an Online TV series thing you don’t want to do? In case you didn’t know, you Summer or You’ve Got Mail, I could enjoy. load of crap. known as Red vs. Blue. The Not necessarily. In fact, any- need 124 credits to graduate am all ears. What’s Totally Awful: series, which uses the popular one who tells you that you have from Thiel. Your major’s cred- Halo series as a basis for their to have a complete idea of what it requirements will vary. For filming, has been a regular on you want to do by the time example, mine is around 95 Thiel With It: Bistro points their website for over ten years. you’re a freshman in college is credits. So the other roughly The series itself is meaning- not wrong, but they’re not com- 30 credits comes from classes by Keeley Criswell, [email protected] & Katie Allgeier, [email protected] less for the purposes of this pletely right. You have time to that you need to take. “Thiel With It” is a satirical representation of life at Thiel. We understand that there are some piece. In the first episode, aired experiment and see what fits. If you didn’t know that, I things that simply cannot be changed, and that many of the things that frustrate students are done in 2001, I remember a main At no point has anyone ever would suggest you start look- for a reason. However, students still enjoy some comic relief about the subjects that are often out character asking another: “Hey, looked over high school seniors ing over your major a little of our hands. This is how we “Thiel with it.” why are we here?” The second and picked careers for people. more closely. You may have Katie: I think one of the big- points we get would increase insert it here, I know who to main character in the shot, in a If they did, that would be some- higher credit hours per semes- gest challenges in college is with the prices of meal plans. ask about this, and I think it rather long response, basically thing from A Brave New World, ter if you’re not careful. No probably budgeting. Keeley: And the meal plans might be posted on the web- says he doesn’t know. thankfully we haven’t gone that one really wants to take a 17, Time, energy....and Bistro are so expensive as it is! It site) for our meal plans! Do you know why you’re far backwards in evolution. 18 credit semester, but that’s points. Mostly Bistro points. would be nice to actually get Katie: And the prices for here, or you like the droves There are plenty of oppor- how it works, sometimes. Keeley: It would be interest- a decent amount of food with meals keep going up, but the of other adults who are still tunities all over campus to find So, yes you have time to ing to do a study and see how what we have to pay. Because, size keeps staying the same. trying to find their way in the the fit that’s best for you. Each think about what you want to many students run out if their let’s be honest, virtually no Keeley: And they charge you never-ending game of Life? department has something do. Just be sure not to wait too Bistro points by the end if the one wants to eat in the cafete- for what seems like every- In my last opinion piece, I unique to it. For example, the long, because graduation is not semester. It seems to me that ria for EVERY meal. Students thing! I got charged one day asked the question of what’s Communications department as far away as you think. I’m most students end up running like the added diversity from for marinara sauce that I didn’t happened to the meaning of has the new television, radio, already almost done with two out. being able to eat at the bistro, even want! Valentine’s Day and relation- and newspaper offices and the years here at Thiel, and it feels Katie: I’m approaching the too. Katie: I hear you on the ships, in general. For those of Pedas Fellows mentoring and like I just got here. halfway point with mine and Katie: Plus some people need marinara: it seems like we’re you who missed it; it’s all right. assistance program. Don’t throw away the oppor- it’s only been a few weeks! to eat at the bistro because of being charged for every last Those who even read it proba- This is just the Comm de- tunity that is college. For some, When I was a freshman I their schedules. No one is de- smidgen sometimes. “Oh you bly don’t agree with it anyway, partment. There are others it only comes once. If you do remember having a bunch left bating the merits of the bistro: didn’t want those extra drops which isn’t a problem. There spread out across Thiel’s cam- throw it away, then what? Get- over at the end of the semester, it’s just be nice if the amount of ketchup? We’ll take off the are nay-sayers for every issue. pus. You may have received a ting into a school like Thiel but now I have to be careful of points we got increased with charge for you.” That’s just the way of things. paper which shows the classes doesn’t happen to everyone. when I use them. the amount we have to pay for Keeley: It’s super frustrating. Still, what if you don’t have you have to take for your major Oh, how quickly life passes Keeley: Bistro meals are just our meal plans. But I suppose we’ll just have any idea what you want to do to graduate (I think even people you by if you let it. Enjoy col- so expensive. Keeley: I hear you. Right now, to Thiel With It. with your life? Does that mean who are undecided have this). lege, but remember to find time Katie: Yeah, it’d be nice if the we pay (find out amount and you’re doomed to spending the Be sure to fill this out to its en- to work for that education, too. OPINION Page 5 Friday, February 27, 2015 THIELENSIAN #Twittin’ Photo of the Edition @Thielensian @??? - The things you do for art credits

@??? - Parking Lot Darwinism: the Thiel College Story

@??? - Oh Thiel High School, you never cease to amaze me...

@??? - Thiel has not canceled all classes since the blizzard of 93.

@??? - #GiveTruthAChance

@??? - One day it will all make sense.

@??? - Happiness > over everything

@??? - Changing the world one smile at a time.

@??? - Operation not do my homework on purpose.

@??? - Pizza is cooler than you are.

@??? - Kinda wish I never acted the way I did.

@??? - I got a ways to go.

@??? - Actually walked outside and did not feel like I was walking into a freezer.

@??? - Twooooooo weeeeeeeeksss tillll sprinngggg breakkkkkk. While the snow and ice has been around since the start of the new semester, it shows no sign of letting up. Photo credit: Hunter Michaelis @??? - Baby don’t put me on your back burner.

@??? - Nothing gets me hyped like watching Rueben yawn. It’s literal- ly one of the cutest things to witness.

Thiel auditor offers experience Fashion Frenzy: by Pat Donner, [email protected] Kayne’s New Line the family of five to sit around the Slides led to photo prints... recorded kitchen table viewing our lives on the on film on spools that came packaged by Katie Allgeier, [email protected] rounded, white refrigerator door. in little tin cans. Making sure that As a fashion columnist, I often Yeezy, my man: what is the fascina- Eventually, to make viewing sim- the edges of the film were securely think, “Wouldn’t it be nice, just once, tion with the body-stockings? Half of pler, a projector, screen, and Kodak attached to the sprockets in the cam- to have an opening night or mov- the clothes in the collection look like carousel trays (to hold the slides) were era was a heart-stopper. After taking ie premiere with dresses that wom- some pro-celibacy activist went cra- purchased. (Seeing flat pictures with- each picture, the film was manually en can actually wear, suits that men zy with a sewing machine and some out “Frigidaire” on the upper corner of advanced. Years ago, during a trip to won’t run from?” hope. And are the bald caps a require- each one was a real step forward). Oregon, I was puzzled that the film I’d love, most importantly, to have ment? As I left home for college, I was continued to advance long after I had a fashion line come out that is easily gifted a 35mm camera and encouraged reached 36, the number of prints that accessible to the general public, and to record my college years as slides could be recorded on that roll. The not just labeled “ready to wear” by instead of photos... and I did. But it film hadn’t been securely attached; some fashion guru with strange glass- Over the years, with my limited time didn’t take long for me to realize that it had never advanced. I had no pic- each day on the Thiel campus, I hav- es? The world would be a fairer place without access to viewing equipment, tures... a hard lesson. if that were the case. en’t been in the right locations to pick holding slides up to the light on my Taking the film to a drugstore to up a copy of the Thielensian. Unfortunately, the world is unfair. desk wasn’t much fun; it didn’t allow be sent away to be developed and And because the world is unfair, To help me become more familiar for sharing. anxiously awaiting the day when the with the publication for which I’m now Kanye West has been allowed to re- Several years ago, I sent many of prints were available was a continual lease a new fashion line with Adidas. writing, Professor Shaffer provided me those old slides to a California compa- exercise in patience... and praying that with a back issue, and when I met with And friends, it is hideous. Hunter Michaelis to discuss my first article, I picked up a back issue in the newspaper office. Together with hav- ing the chance to read the January 30 issue, I certainly commend the staff for a thorough, interesting newspaper. Maryanne Elder’s “Canon or Apparently the smart stocking-wear- Nikon?” article in the October 31, ing refugee brings her clothes in 2014 issue and her photo of Brother bags. Martin’s Walk in the December 5, 2014 issue caught my interest and helped me Moreover, are the models sup- determine the focus of my contribution posed to look like urban refugees? Is to this issue of the paper. he taking his inspiration from “The Over dinner recently, a friend and I Walking Dead?” No, in fact, West reminisced about the drastic changes in had some concrete reasons for why The hope for blooming plants and a sun-shining Thiel campus is one of many his clothes look the way they do. just our lifetimes that have taken place I would be angry too if I looked this hopes that students have in the middle of midterms. “Workwear, utility, the idea of being in the recording of memories, photog- bad. raphy. Growing up in the 1940s and Photo credit: Pat Donner a dad, no time to look in the mirror In an interview with Vogue, West because I’m looking at my daughter, 1950s, my family’s memories were re- ny that transferred them to CDs, mak- those precious memories weren’t lost stated that his goal was to create piec- corded on slides. It was an occasion I’m looking at my wife. And I’ve got ing them easily accessible. Today, I in transport and processing. es that were more accessible to the to take her to dance class,” West said, when Dad got out the packs of slides think that service is available closer to Expecting great results, we would average person. “I’m only concerned and set up the borrowed projector for noting that his main motivation was home at Wal-Mart. tear into those envelopes... only to with making beautiful products avail- the casual look of someone with a be disappointed to find that eight out able to as many people as possible,” busy schedule. of ten of those photos weren’t worth West said. Friends, I have a very busy sched- keeping. To secure duplicates copies And you know what, that’s a great ule myself, and most mornings I of a print meant very careful handling idea, thanks Yeezy. It’s just… the fol- barely look in the mirror before of the “negative” and, again, waiting low though is a little lacking. dashing out the door. But never once for processing. have I considered a body-stocking The monetary cost of film and devel- and high-waisted undies an appropri- oping and the cost in time soon made ate outfit. picture taking not fun. Years later, de- Look, I’m not saying he’s not a ciding to give photography another try, creative person. I’m not even say- I purchased a Canon AE-1 and, over ing the clothes aren’t sort of cool, time, I accumulated a number of lens- from an artistic standpoint. It’s easy es and filters... way too many bells and to see how the clothes reflect West’s whistles for someone who just wanted urban-chic tendencies, and one could to point and shoot. Again, I was deal- even draw some socioeconomic con- ing with film and sprockets and devel- clusions from them. I’m just saying oping time and negatives... not fun. that maybe fashion for the pub- As each step leads to another... I’ve lic isn’t exactly where Kanye West learned that Thiel has a photography The winter has been hard on the campus, with Hodge Hall having problems of should be heading. For the good of club... should look into that. its own, but spring is just around the corner. YOU ARE NOT WEARING civilization, please stop this train be- Photo credit: Pat Donner CLOTHES MADAM. fore it gets any more out of control. Page 6 SPORTS Friday, February 27, 2015 THIELENSIAN Tomcats Shine on Men’s Lacrosse drops heart Senior Night breaker to W&J by Paul Connelly, [email protected] by Paul Connelly, [email protected] A late quarter comeback consecutive possessions but ter a foul on W&J led to a nice wasn’t enough to top PAC ri- Weldon came up with saves finish by Edward Kargbo, with val Washington and Jefferson on two shot attempts and the O’Shea racking up the assist. when the Tomcats fell 9-8 to Tomcats are given a two-man Thiel scored nearly a min- the Presidents in a close battle EMO but following its expira- ute later and it was O’Shea and their opening game of the tion, O’Shea notched one when and Kargbo, again, this time season. the field was even and the Tom- switching roles on the finish. The Presidents started off on cats were down one. Follow- The Presidents answered right a roll, outscoring the Tomcats ing Macurak’s kickout to Thiel back as Angell got the look 5-1 in the first quarter. W&J senior Jacob paviol to win the from Chase Bennett right from won the opening face-off and next faceoff, Weldon record- the faceoff. the Presidents’ Tim Angell ed two more saves to keep the A lengthy W&J possession scored the first goal. Another score at 5-4 at the half. led to another President goal successful President win at the The Tomcats turned things to increase the deficit to three. X led to the second W&J goal, around in the second quarter Weldon racked up a save and but Thiel’s Mike Bryant found to take more shots, 20-18, and cleared the ball down, lead- the back of the net for the first continued to get the edge on ing to an unassisted goal from Tomcat score off of the assist GB’s with 13-11 in the second. O’Shea with six minutes left in from Timothy O’Shea. Weldon had also stepped up the game. The Tomcats brought Following two more goals in the cage to help the Tomcat it within just one with under from the Presidents, Tomcat effort in the second, with six three minutes left after O’Shea senior Zach Macurak record- saves while Succop only had found Aaron Parry with 2:48 on ed the first faceoff win for the two for the Presidents. the clock. Tomcats but O’Shea’s shot was The Tomcats won the open- The Tomcats were given the stopped by W&J goalie Jacob ing faceoff of the third quarter chance to tie on a huge EMO Succop and the Tomcats trailed but Bryant’s shot was stopped following an unsportsman- 5-1 at the end of the first. Tom- by Succop and Angell got the like conduct and a two-minute Tomcat senior Eric Mallinger finished with 16 points and nine rebounds in Thiel’s 72-60 win cat goalie Ryan Weldon had and-one goal as a tripping call non-releasable unnecessary over Grove City on senior night. two saves in the first and Thiel on Thiel gave the Presidents roughness call on Fredericks. *Photo:THIEL SID* had taken five shots on goal, the advantage on the next fa- Parry’s shot was saved by Suc- with eight total. Thiel was win- ceoff. Macurak won the next cop following the first penal- The Tomcats finished off the advantage on the glass, out-re- the quick pullup from outside ning on the ground, with 10-6 contest at midfield but the ty’s release and Whipkey was regular season on a high note bounding the Wolverines 20-15 to bring the Wolverines within on groundballs but was 8-5 on Presidents force another Thiel called for an illegal procedure and gained some momentum in the first half and were- per single digits for the first time in turnovers. turnover and it’s Zachary Fred- and the Tomcats are two-man heading into PAC’s with their forming much better from long the second half. Three straight Tomcat goals ericks who gets the Presidents up for 31 seconds. 72-60 win over Grove City on range, making four-of-eight The Wolverines were forced brought Thiel within one to second consecutive goal with O’Shea got the ball back af- senior night. attempts as opposed to Grove to foul as Wolverine Joe Ver- start the second quarter. Bryant the man-advantage. Another ter forcing a W&J turnover Down seven points early in City’s one-of-ten. milya contributed another three opened the scoring up for the two-man-up opportunity fell and Thiel called a timeout with the first half, the Tomcats man- Mallinger led the Tomcats points to the board and Bess Tomcats yet again following a flat for the Tomcats as Succop 1:17 remaining. O’Shea’s shot aged to take back the lead be- with eleven points while Koch- and Thomas went to the line W&J turnover. picked up three more saves to went wide and W&J got it back fore heading into the locker ka had nine points, shooting to go three-of-four combined The Presidents won the next keep the Tomcats scoreless in to hold on for the close win in a room and pulled away in the a perfect three-for-three from at the foul-line to increase the faceoff and Presidents’ John the third quarter. close one for the Tomcats. second. downtown. Tomcat lead to 11. That would Bursch’s shot was saved by Thiel started to get more shots O’Shea led the Tomcats with The Wolverines started out Kochka kicked the scoring off be the last of the scoring for Weldon who cleared the ball off per possession after the seven points, with three goals hot, going on an 8-1 run to for the Tomcats in the second Grove City as Tomcat Josh down field. Two shots by at- Tomcat attack rattled off five and four assists, while Mike start the first half. The Tom- half with his fourth three-point- Johnson went four-of-four for tackman Alex Casile struck takes, including Sean Loney’s Bryant had two for Thiel. Par- cats kicked things into gear, er of the night and the Tomcats free-throws to finish and seal wide but O’Shea backed it up which pinged off of the pipe ry, Andrew Casile, and Kargbo responding with a 13-1 run to started off on a 10-4 run. Koch- the win for Thiel on a very im- and found Andrew Casile for and Bryant’s was on-target but each split two goals. Weldon take the early lead as senior ka, then, hit his fifth from be- portant night. the Tomcats second straight Succop denied him. The Tom- had 11 saves. Eric Mallinger was responsible yond the arc and Grove City’s Kochka finished with 21 score. cats would make the net sing for nine and Luke Kochka was Mitch Marmelstein answered ponts and was unconscious Two Thiel fouls give W&J on the following possession af- good for two makes beyond the back with a long range bucket from long range, going six- arc. of his own. of-seven from outside while Grove City stayed close be- Kochka made his sixth from Mallinger closed out with 16 hind for the remainder of the outside and the Tomcats went points and nine boards. Bess first half as the Wolverines on a 9-4 run as Tyreik Burton and Johnson had nine and sev- kept the deficit to single dig- found Khari Bess on the break en points respectively. Johnson its. Kochka splashed his third and the Tomcats took their big- was seven-for-eight at the line make from outside and Berto gest lead of the game with 15 while Thomas finished four-of- Dryden hit his own from be- points. four at the charity stripe.\ yond the arc to contribute to With under three minutes The Tomcats, overall, fin- the Tomcats 27-20 lead at the left, Charlie Thomas went to ished with a 70.6% perfor- half. the line to go two-of-two and mance for free-throws, going The Tomcats had the slight Grove City’s JT Schwartz hit 24-for-34. State of the Steelers by Christian Kafka, [email protected] The end- Bell had great running lanes nerback, Ike Taylor is another ed the season with a playoff available and quarterback Ben veteran who is nearing the end loss to the Baltimore Ravens Roethlisberger was sacked a lot of his career (35 years old) 30-17. less than usual (33). Surpris- and they do not have any sol- Junior attackman Timothy O’Shea had seven points in the Tomcat 9-8 loss to W&J in Thiel’s It was unfortunate for a team ingly, the defense of the Steel- id depth at this position since it season opener with such potential to lose in ers will need major upgrades is apparent that he will be re- *Photo:Thiel SID* the wild card round, but they this offseason to create a cham- leased. have many things to be happy pionship-caliber football team. Since the Steelers are tight about going into next year. The Steelers’ overall defense against the salary cap again SUPPORT YOUR TOMCATS! Their offense was one of the finished with a ranking of 18th this year, look for them to try most potent in 2014, averaging in 2014. That is inexcusable for bargains in free agency. 411.1 yards a game (second in for a team that has historically They are looking to extend 2/28 the NFL) with a young nucle- been built for defense. The unit Roethlisberger’s contract, so us of players. Antonio Brown has been finishing worse and that could free up some room to Women’s Lax v. College of Mount St. Joseph may be the best receiver in worse over the past few years, get some salary cap casualties football after recording another which may have led to the “re- to fill a few voids. However, @ 1 pm great season with 129 catches signing” of longtime defensive the draft will be pivotal for this for 1,698 yards and 13 touch- coordinator Dick LeBeau (now team to build off their success downs. He is one of the best in for the . Keith in 2015. Men’s Lax v. Houghton College @ 4 pm the league at recording yards Butler has big shoes to fill as he Since Worilds might be after the catch with 568. steps into Lebeau’s role. Many gone, they will most likely take 3/4 They will bring back a veterans such as Brett Keis- a pass rusher in the first three healthy Le’Veon Bell, who has el, , and James rounds. This draft has a good Men’s VB v. Penn State Altoona @ 7:30 pm become a top running back. He Harrison may be on their way pass rusher class, so they could is the best overall back when out as the team is looking to get take one in the first round if the 3/5 combining rushing and receiv- younger. Harrison and Keisel’s top safety (Landon Collins) is ing; the next Marshall Faulk replacements, Jason Worilds off the board. There are also Women’s Lax v. Allegheny College @ 7 pm (with way more power). and Stephon Tuitt, have shown many talented cornerbacks, so Rookie wide receiver Mar- potential in being long-term Pittsburgh could potentially tavis Bryant (fourth round) pieces for the team. However, not only fill their needs, but fill 3/6 added a red zone presence with Worilds is an unrestricted free them with star-caliber players eight touchdowns and should agent this season. as well. Men’s VB v. Cairn University @ 6 pm be the number two receiver go- New safeties Look for the Steelers to be ing forward. Most importantly, and Shamarko Thomas have in contention, not just for the 3/7 the offensive line performed not played well so far so Pitts- AFC North, but for the Super amazingly this year; best line burgh will be looking for safe- Bowl as well. Women’s Lax v. Defiance College @ 2 pm in recent memory. ties early in the draft. At cor-

The views and opinions expressed in the Thielensian do not reflect those of the Thiel College community as a whole. The views expressed by the writers of this publication are original to the author and by no means re- flect the opinions of Thiel’s faculty, staff, or student body.