Being the Change, Not Waiting For It

Thomas Cruz Fordham College at Lincoln Center

Abstract

In the following essay, I recount an experience that I will cherish for the rest of my life.

Lead for Diversity has provided me with the confidence and knowledge to take on the role of being an agent of positive change for today’s society.

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One Sunday morning, I packed all my clothes and was ready to embark on a new

experience, an experience that allows delegates from high school grades 10 through 12 throughout the state to break barriers, deal with biased behavior, and develop an action plan to

reduce prejudice in their own school communities. To have this Lead for Diversity experience, I

had to leave my friends and family. Knowing only the other four delegates from my school, I got

on the bus, not knowing the 66 other people. Little did I know that it would be an experience of

mine that would teach me something very important: it should never be doubted that “a small

group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world” (Margaret Mead).

When I first stepped off the bus with the other students at the Lead for Diversity

experience, we were greeted by intense enthusiasm. All the delegates started with their school-

based groups, relying on the safety of the familiar. However, it took only a few hours for us all to

learn that, at Lead for Diversity, there is nothing to fear but the loss of bigotry and bias. The step

I took off the bus had me leave behind the world of comfortable familiarity. From then on, all the

delegates, including myself, began to extend our own boundaries by sharing our ideas, feelings,

and talents. It was a step forward into an experience of awareness and understanding and

gradually learning to better appreciate themselves and others. All the delegates represented a

wide diversity of the state of New Jersey, with a variety of racial, religious, economic, and ethnic

backgrounds, which made it easier for me to feel accepted in the new environment I was dealing

with. We all learned how aspects of our own identities positively and negatively affect those

around us without ever knowing it. In addition to the students, the staff of the program was just

as diverse as the delegates. Delegate or staff, they would all become close to me by the end of

the experience. Both the delegates and the staff provided caring support and understanding Cruz. 3 among all cultures and races, which allowed me to relate to them all much easier.

During the Lead for Diversity experience, along with the delegates and staff, I took part in many different activities that would come with a lot of lessons learned. One of the activities that I will never forget is called the “Race Privilege Line.” All of those participating were lined up, side-by-side, facing one direction. One of the counselors had to say aloud one statement at a time, and if it applied to one’s race, he or she would have to take a step (forward or backward depending on the statement). For example, one statement said, “If you feel that you can’t trust in the police for help due to your race, please take one step back” (negative statement). For positive statements dealing with races, people would take one step forward. Everyone’s eyes were to be kept closed, so that no one can follow where their friends are going. After about 50 statements read, everyone’s eyes were to be opened, and the obvious truth of the world was revealed. Way in the front were the Whites; close to where everyone started was where I stood, along with

Asians and Indians; and majority of Hispanics and Blacks were behind the line. Everyone stood silent, as there was a sense of awkwardness in the air above everyone. I looked around and saw myself and all of my friends scattered away from each other. It was a time that opened my eyes to what is happening in the world.

On our third day there, we discussed about men and women privileges. Men and women were divided into their respective gender groups. Me and the other young men went into a room to discuss all of the stereotypes that we could think of that are said about females. We came up with a huge list. Some of them revolved around the typically known gentle side of a person, such as cleaning and nurturing. However, most of the stereotypes mentioned were extreme terms, such as “whore” and “slut.” The list had some good terms, but the harsh stereotypes easily outnumbered them. When we had to share our list to the females, the men feared that they would Cruz. 4 be upset. And believe me: they were. The women looked at us with disappointment on their faces, as if we came up with the terms. But we didn’t; we just made a list of what we heard on the news, in music videos, on television shows, etc. That didn’t matter to the girls, though. That day, I learned that all that mattered was what was true; those terms are said about them almost every day, and whether they are told in a joking matter or not, they reinforce the gender roles that hinder a person from being free to express his or her individuality.

The program gave me a better understanding of who I am, and who everyone else is. I was glad to see and hear the truth, not alone, but with about 70 other people to help me up after everything. Sharing this experience bonded me with all of them because it was such a huge issue that we shared ideas about. Taking the step off the bus, leaving the experience, was extremely difficult for me. However, I know that I can rely on anyone from the Lead for Diversity program when I need help, in anything. From the end of the experience and on, my actions will always take the things I have learned there into consideration before following through. Thinking about a song of music artist John Mayer, “Waiting on the World to Change,” I am going to take that song and use it as something to go by for the rest of my life, but the only difference is that you won’t see me waiting.

It's been five years since I embarked on the Lead for Diversity experience. I can proudly say that I have been spreading the message of respecting diversity through my actions. When I hear someone next to me say, “that’s gay” or “that’s retarded,” I tell that person those words are not synonyms for “stupid.” Every opportunity I get to share my reflection on Lead for Diversity in classes, I don’t hesitate, simply because what I learned there is valuable, and the knowledge I gained doesn’t have to be a benefit to only me. The lessons I learned from there have had a positive impact on me, and I feel responsible to relay those lessons to people around me. I’m a Cruz. 5 feminist agent of change who will continue to lead by example in the fight for diversity and equality.

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Works Cited

Mayer, John. “Waiting on the World to Change.” Continuum. 2006.

Mead, Margaret. Quotes.net. STANDS4 LLC, 2012. 25 April. 2012.

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