Winter/Spring 2015

The Friends Academy Magazine for Alumni, Parents & Friends The Meeting House Winter/Spring 2015

Upper School Art welcomes spring at FA Friends Academy Board of Trustees, 2014–2015 Co–Presidents Thomas Hawkins ’78 Scott Rechler

Treasurer Francis Ingrassia

Board Members Strong Minds. Carl Ashkin Kind Hearts. Peggy Brucia Jeff Daniels ’90 The Friends Academy Mission Debra Del Vecchio Steve Fortuna Founded in 1876 by Gideon Frost for “the children Conchita Heffron Elizabeth McCaul Ingrassia of Friends and those similarly sentimented,” Friends Andrew Menzin ’81 Academy is a Quaker, coeducational, independent, Victoria Quesada Moore college preparatory school serving 775 students Joe Podbela from age three through twelfth grade. Robert Rosenbaum George Tsunis The school’s philosophy is based on the Quaker Robin Wachtler ’83 Craig White ’61 principles of integrity, simplicity, patience, moderation, peaceful resolution of conflict, and a Head of School belief that the silence and simple ministry of the William G. Morris Jr. “gathered meeting” brings the presence of God into the midst of busy lives. Friends Academy is Friends Academy Alumni Association, 2014–2015 committed to developing a diverse community whose President Peter Stein ’79 members value excellence in learning and growth in knowledge and skill, a genuine commitment to Vice President service and ethical action, and a realization that Penelope Wylie Mayer ’75 every life is to be explored, celebrated, and enjoyed Secretary in the spirit of the Religious Society of Friends. Thomas Pascarella ’95 Alumni Board Members The Meeting House Craig White ’61 Editorial Board, 2014–2015 Barbara Shoen Brundige ’63 Thomas Hawkins ’78 Amanda Fisk ’99 Elisabeth Dillof Dreizen ’78 Kathy Fox Margaret Keats ‘79 Natalia Porcelli Good ’93 Laura Dilimetin ‘83 Hayley Kucich ’03 Allison Trani Kellan ‘84 Penelope Wylie Mayer ’75 Kara Vassel Lewis ‘86 Andrea Miller Kathryn Hawkins Schneider ’86 Jennifer Ryan Woods ’99 Michael Fox ‘91 Elizabeth Siris Winchester ’91 Alana Teutonico Brock ’94 Courtney Devon Taylor ’01 Hadley Mongell ‘01 Heather Tilton Rubinstein ‘01 Salwa Touma ’01 Rebecca Pacchiano ’07 President Emeritus James R. Greene ‘74 The Meeting House | Fall 2009 Alumni Office Alumni Affairs Coordinator, Kathy Fox From the Head of School William G. Morris Jr.

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From The Archives: 1823 – Gideon Frost Marriage Certificate

s hive arc

my de aca Mary and Gideon Frost Starting on page 32, reminisce with 10 alumni and current faculty who

chose to celebrate a Quaker wedding.

s d n ie fr of sy e rt u co A copy of Gideon and Mary Frost’s Quaker wedding certificate, which begins: “Gideon Frost of the city county and state of New York, son of Caleb Frost and Sarah his wife, and Mary Willets daughter of William Willets and Letitia his wife, (the latter deceased) in the town of Marcellus, county of Onondaga, and state aforesaid, having laid their intentions of marriage with each other before two monthly meetings of the Religious Society of Friends, held at Scipio, in the state aforesaid, they having consent of parents, and nothing appearing to obstruct; their proposal of marriage was allowed by the meeting: These are to certify that for the accomplishment of their intentions, this twenty fourth day of the fourth month, in the year of our Lord one thousand eight hundred and twenty three...” The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Visting Buddhist monk Lama Tenzin’s completed Friends Academy Sand Mandala of Compassion, page 10. insideVol. 50, No. 2 Meeting House Letters. 6 Around the Quad. 7 Freshmen Service Day One World, Many Stories Artful SPICES ‘Nothing lasts forever’ Flipped Learning at FA: Science, Math host Open House The Arts. 14 Well, well, “Hello, Dolly!” waltzes onto the FA stage as this winter’s all-school musical. Feature Story. 18 Diversifying Diversity: Friends charts new directions to explore issues of inclusion and identity. Sports: Go FA! 22 Triumph and hard work. Perseverance and close calls. Battling it out in the top Class A division, Winter Sports athletes gave their all. FA Auction. 27 A look back at the 23rd Dinner and Auction, which returned to historic Oheka Castle this year. Faculty Milestones. 28 Alumni News & Profiles. 30 Hear the latest from Alumni Association President Peter Stein and then reminisce with 10 alumni and faculty in “Once Upon A Quaker Wedding.” Class Notes. 40 In Memoriam. 56

The Meeting House Staff

Editor Andrea Miller, Director of Communications and Marketing 516.393.4295 | [email protected] Writers Kathy Fox, Hayley Kucich ’03 and Andrea Miller Photographers Amanda Fisk ’99 and Alan Quackenbush on the cover A WARM-WEATHER WELCOME. Freshman Courtney Taylor started this assignment as a blind contour drawing in pencil on butcher paper. To add color and details, she went back in with oil pastel. Her painting, along with others was displayed this spring in the Locust Valley Chamber of Commerce Art Walk. Meeting House Thoughts, memories and reflections letters from our readers ... you! Remembering Roger: shared testimonies to a favorite teacher On Saturday, March 7th, over 100 former students, fellow colleagues, family and friends united under In the Meeting House, the pace was brisk. the roof of the Matinecock Meeting House to remember and celebrate the life of FA English teacher Roger There were stories, humor, set pieces and Erickson. Read David Cressey’s ‘71 account of that incredible morning of sharing and remembering. testimony, wonderfully told. There were no commercials. A clear sense of the man n a subzero morning we set out bungalows, the hideaways and stairways to emerged: Roger had been an important from our secluded holler in the nowhere, arrayed around Hyland Garden. person to many because he had strong, fracking fields of Westsylvania Roger’s admirers came in droves, from uplifting interests and enjoyed sharing and for a 500-mile pilgrimage to across the years. The resulting conversa- teaching those interests. He loved to laugh. FriendsO Academy. Our mission: to witness tional free-for-all was wildly stimulating, His central interest was people, young people the memorial Meeting for Roger Erickson. and must have been something to behold. especially. Many of his students who spoke To me, he is a favorite teacher, brilliant and To be sure, there were some described an experience exuberant. My wife Bobbi met Roger only swings and misses. Our class remarkably similar to my once, 21 years ago, and he made a lasting was represented by the ever own: he taught us English impression. talented, and ’71 loyalist, as freshmen and seniors and Almost immediately, things began to go Angela Manno; Paula Jensen- made each of us feel gifted wrong. An accident closed the main road Moulton, who spoke mov- in some aspect of the writ- into our town, and we had to detour on ingly at the Meeting; and my ten or spoken word. hillside-clinging gravel lanes that bore evi- teammate in all sports, Bill For a moment, I felt dence of the flooding two days previous. The Vitriol. Among others, were deflated. Far from being intervening day had brought the winter’s all too brief encounters with unique – as Mr. Erickson biggest, by far, snowfall. Soon I was identify- the likes of Kenny Marten, had led me to believe, hadn’t ing with the beleaguered Anse Bundren Chuck Bralver, Jim Bebry, he – I was a mere foot sol- from As I Lay Dying. Clearly, Roger was Gene Hamilton, Michael dier in a vast Quaker army. going to have some fun – if that is the right Gordon, John Mankiewicz The next moment of word – with us. When we slouched into an (first visit to Friends since recognition was more en- inn at Jericho, 12 hours later, after a jarring 1972), Jimmy Neville, who nobling. Mr. Erickson was re-introduction to the slog of Long Island dredged up memories of the the best because he cared rush-hour traffic on a Friday afternoon, we 1968 Stony Brook game, and the most and worked the were frazzled beyond recognition. Masha Slobodskoy, making hardest. He held himself Saturday, March 7, 2015 was bright sly reference to (my) teenage to the highest standard. and clear. My parents, Bob and Jackie, had sillinesses. He expended his consider- journeyed down from Maine and together, The ground-breaking able energies and intellect we trod the once familiar roads toward Glen faculty of the late Sixties, in preparing his material Cove and Locust Valley. A slight misremem- Mr. Erickson’s cohorts, were and making each class as brance had us on Frost Pond Road, then onto there in force: Mr. Lewis, Mr. memorable as possible – Piping Rock. Around a bend appeared the Thomas, Mrs. Hummerstone, Mr. Cressey, how about the time he almost jumped out of Matinecock Meeting House, resplendent, as Mr. Craig, Miss Parmelee, Mrs. Gilden, Mr. his classroom window! If you showed one if in a painting. Shaw, Miss Brucia. Almost all had gone on scintilla of interest, he threw in, then upped We had time to poke around the Friends to other places as, of course, had we students. the ante. With minimal ego, he matched any campus, once our home. It is so impressive Mr. E was one who stayed (and stayed) and raise you might dare make. now, grand, transformed from the day in became – what would be the right word Praise God we had Roger Erickson to 1966 when Roger Erickson, itinerant read- here – an anchor, a touchstone, embodiment, teach the would-be teachers, to inspire the ing specialist, arrived in his VW bug, Wag- talisman, spiritual essence of whatever it is aspiring poets and, not least, to guide the ner (that is pronounced “Vogner,” people). that defines a Friends Academy education future lawyers. Do you recall the funky assemblage of yore: for thousands of students over a span of 35 – David Cressey ’71 the barns, the glass houses, the cottages and years. “Mr. Erickson was the best because he cared the most and worked the hardest. He held himself to the highest standard.”

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Around the Quad 7

Freshmen Service Day Sixth Grade gives students way to give back Egyptologists hroughout the morning of TThursday, January 8th, 90+ freshmen spread out around campus and the greater community with service assignments in hand. Ninth grade advisories assembled sandwiches for the Glen Cove INN, a local soup kitchen; ventured into Kindergarten to help their younger schoolmates learn about Australia; sorted through the campus Lost and Found, explored Human Rights issues with the Amnesty Club and traveled to the Glen Cove Senior Center to socialize with senior citizens. Other students led adaptive physical education activities with autistic children from Brookville Center for Children’s Services (AHRC). The largest group, numbering 21 students, gathered in the Quaker Student Life Center, to make over 100 sandwiches. “We need a reinforcement of meat!” declared one student as plastic-gloved hands quickly wrapped and packed the sandwiches. Upstairs, on the third floor of the Kumar Wang Library, Amnesty Club president junior Julia Searby guided a class of ninth graders through a lesson in Human Rights advocacy. After a small group discussion, students chose an issue (i.e. police brutality in Chicago, Nassau County Human Rights Commis- sion, Chelsea Manning) and began AMANDA FISK/FRIENDS ACADEMY crafting letters to prominent leaders Sixth grade students focused on four topics (Mythology, Pyramids/Tombs, Hieroglyphics and of organizations and countries. Mummification) for their Egypt unit. After being sorted into groups, each student wrote an “Education is the most power- essay about their topic and then began to develop a collaborative plan for their projects. ful weapon which you can use to Students were asked to have one Art History component, an interactive piece, use their iPad and design a posterboard with pictures and information. “One group created a replica of the Rosetta change the world,” quoted Searby of Stone, one group created a pyramid out of Legos and filled it with candy, another developed a Nelson Mandela, who started the FA ‘carnival’ game where you dropped clay organs into the correct Canopic jar,” shared Social Amnesty Club this year. Studies teacher Phil Cicciari. “One of my favorites was the Pharaoh photo booth (bottom). Stu- dents and teachers stuck their faces into a cutout of a pharaoh and were given a keepsake photo.” Despite the time lost from snow days, the class went above and beyond to create their projects.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 8 Around the Quad

Lower School Goes Global One World, Many Stories

CLARE NESFIELD/friends academy A team of ten boys and girls comprised the Middle School Robotics team, an after school club. MS Robotics team garners first place in Innovation his spring, the Middle School TLego Robotics team walked away with first place in the Most AMANDA FISK PHOTOS/friends academy Innovative Solution category Director of Admissions Nina Waechter tours Europe in the third grade classroom with Jesse Grossman. of the FLL Long Island Championship. n its fourth year, Lower School The team of ten students Goes Global, the year-long global developed a program to Istudies program that is threaded improve keyboarding skills using through core classroom and special area SCRATCH and a pair of custom curriculum, reached outward. gloves with conductive thread. In addition to learning about the The gloves were used to cultures and peoples of seven differ- interface with the keyboard that ent continents, students personally sounded a signal when a mistake connected with classrooms around the Above, fifth grader David Cooper explains the was made. Early on the team globe through Skype, e-mail and blogs. Chinese Zodiac to a classmate. wanted to focus their project on In Early Childhood Play Group solutions that would help a students adopted an Emperor Penguin River of Africa and in an integrated variety of different learners. while studying Antarctica; the older Science and Writing project, studied the Pre-K students learned about Hawaii pros and cons of the Aswan Dam and through song, dance and cuisine. then wrote persuasive letters to African Kindergartners “dove” underwater to infrastructure officials about the con- explore the Great Barrier Reef and struction of the Grand Inga Dam. created an undersea mural of its Finally, fifth grade immersed inhabitants. themselves in Asia, from eight differ- Animal studies figured largely in first ent historical fiction book clubs, where and second grades. In first grade, stu- students corresponded nightly on dents investigated animal adaptations Edmodo, to a Writing Workshop unit via their Science class, which culminat- in Persuasive/Opinion Writing, where ed in a Canadian animal study for their students wrote essays to argue whether North American unit. Second graders a 13-year-old boy should have climbed Team member Danielle Kelly demonstrates the studied the birds of South America and Mt. Everest, to an interdisciplinary kinesthetic keyboarding gloves. the layers of their rainforest habitat. study of kites, which are steeped in Fourth graders examined the Nile Asian tradition.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Around the Quad 9

Quaker Youth Leadership Conference

questions asked. Students and faculty returned to Artful Friends Academy inspired to initiate some of these ideas and, in fact, a recent alternative Meeting for Worship was SPICES modeled on student-led discussion. Students and faculty explore workshops and the various service trips “This conference was a great experience, and an excellent Quaker testimonies through stood up frequently to way to meet new peo- art-based medium. speak about different issues that had affected A panel of artists ple and participate in By Joy Lai them, such as gun con- spoke to students activities that further Visual Art Department chair trol, food equity, climate about the risks developed my Quaker values,” said Caroline his year four students and two change and natural they’ve taken for the Wilson, a first time teachers had the opportunity disaster. One student sake of their work. attendee. to participate in the Quaker mentioned how she and T “I have gone to Youth Leadership Conference hosted her mother had been QYLC for the past two years in a row by Tandem Friends in Charlottesville, homeless for awhile. and it has been an incredible oppor- Virginia. The theme of the conference In addition to workshops led on tunity for me to meet kids from other was Art and Social Change: Engaging campus, we were given the opportunity Quaker schools and for me to learn Peace and Justice, which explored how to tour various local places of note and more about our school’s mission and the Quaker testimonies of Peace and participate in service activities, includ- purpose as a Quaker school. Going Justice are represented and encouraged ing a trip to “The Haven,” an elegant on this conference was a phenomenal through the visual arts, music, theater old church now functioning as a shelter, experience and I’m glad I am now able and creative writing. Through panel community and cultural center, and to better understand and embrace discussions, various artists of all types drop-off point for food donations. Quakerism at my school,” echoed of media (dance, visual arts, writing, It also doubles as a drop-in site for Hannah Goldblatt. photography, spoken word, etc.) shared anyone in need of a warm place, no their strategies for creating change: risk-taking, imagination, collaboration, authenticity and honesty. Students at these conferences tend to be passionate about Quaker education and about making the world a better place. By engaging SPICES, student dialogues are often very rich due to their shared commonality and participation in the student-led discussion groups which are by sign-up only. It was inspiring to see students taking initiative in leading discussions around topics they were passionate about. A panel of artists spoke to students about the risks they’ve taken for the sake of their work. The student talent show featured musicians and poets pouring their hearts out to a captive and supportive friends academy audience. The Meeting for Worship was Four students and two arts faculty members attended the Quaker Youth Leadership Conference in Charlottes- powerful. Students empowered by their ville, VA this year.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 10 Around the Quad

Peace Week at Friends

AMANDA FISK PHOTOS/friends academy Visiting professor and Buddhist Monk Lama Tenzin teaches students, faculty and parents about the ancient art and philosophy of the Tibetan Sand Mandala. ‘Nothing lasts forever’ or four days, the red-and-golden vibrations of the chak-pur could be robed Buddhist monk hunched heard. An overflowing bowl of oranges F over the table in the Atrium of and dimly glowing candles set behind the Dolan Center. him, the Venerable Tenzin Yignyen As incense swirled through the air would occasionally raise his head to above him, only the repeated metallic address a question from the gathering

The Making of the Sand Mandala – January 20th to 23rd

1. A sampling of the colored sands used 2. Lama Tenzin vibrates a chak-pur 3. The completed Friends Academy 4. After a blessing, Lama Tenzin begins to construct the Tibetan Sand Mandala to transfer the sand onto the Mandala. Sand Mandala the “dismantling” of the Mandala.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Around the Quad 11

Peace Week at Friends crowd of students, faculty and parents. On Thursday, the Parent Quaker Life “Happiness does not come from pray- Committee sponsored a special parent ing to the gods or to Buddha,” instructed Meeting for Worship in the Meeting Yignyen. “You have to do it – develop House. Against the backdrop of a time compassion, patience and not be selfish.” lapse of Lama Tenzin’s week-long work An ordained Buddhist monk and on the FA Mandala of Compassion, visiting professor of Tibetan Buddhism parents were handed typed quotes about at Hobart and Williams Smith Colleges, kindness, compassion and respect. Lama Tenzin worked diligently over By Friday, the square table in the Peace Week, from January 20 to 23, to Dolan Center Atrium was filled with the create Friends’ first Sand Mandala of intricate designs of the Mandala, just in Lower School community groups brainstorm together Compassion. to create a table out of one piece of cardboard, time for the “dismantling.” Using the chak-pur, an ancient Man- eight sheets of newspaper and masking tape that Surrounded by students, faculty and dala tool, Yignyen methodically caressed can support a heavy book as part of Peace Week parents, Lama Tenzin began to chant, the many-colored sands onto the table’s activities. ring his bell and then cut the diagram sketched pattern. Slowly the symbols of he said. “‘Why are we here?’... ‘ What is into quarters. Passing a small grey- Love and Compassion, Humility, the purpose of our lives?’... ‘Where do colored foam brush to a student in the Patience, Appreciation and Wisdom we go when we die?’ ... ‘What is happi- crowd of Lower schoolers who encircled began to emerge. ness?’” the Mandala, Yignyen instructed him to “Compassion, the heart and kindness Peace Week activities continued start sweeping the sands into the center for others is at the core of the Buddhist throughout the week with Lunch and of the table. religion,” explained Lama Tenzin, who Learns for Upper School students, an “Help me, help me... over there!” urged has constructed countless Mandalas. anti-bullying program for Middle Lama Tenzin as he shared the brush “We discourage against blind faith and School students sponsored by the Anti- with other students. believe that if something is against com- Defamation League, a sixth grade visit to Within a few moments, the red, blue, mon sense, then discussions and debate the Holocaust Museum, Hunger Aware- yellow and green sands, now a nonde- are necessary.” ness Day for Middle and Upper School script color of grey, were scooped into a The size of the table determines how and a private screening of the film,Selma , solitary glass vase. large the Mandala will be and what kind at the Glen Cove Theater on Friday. “To dismantle Mandala reminds us is created. Yignyen, who came to the In Lower School, mixed-age groups that nothing lasts forever – good, bad, U.S. in 1995 and regularly visits other spent a session using Design Thinking, young, old. Nothing lasts forever on this schools around the country, worked as they collaborated to build a table from planet, so don’t get too attached to it. It roughly from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. each day cardboard, newspapers and masking has an end,” reminded Yignyen. “Enjoy on the FA Mandala. tape, solid enough to support the weight it and let it go. Plus all bad things end “At all the schools I’ve been to, the of a heavy book. too – so don’t get discouraged,” he added youngest students are the most interested Groups had 45 minutes to brainstorm, with a twinkle of his eyes. and some kids have very big questions,” build, test and evaluate.

A Peace Week Study of Compassion

5. The colored sands are swept away 6. Lama Tenzin walks to the end of a pier 7. The resting sand of the Mandala 8. The final toss into a moving body and scooped into a glasss vase. in Oyster Bay for the final ceremony. of water symbolizes the transitory nature of material life. The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 12 Around the Quad

Flipped Learning at FA Science, Math host Open House FA faculty invite local educators and share tips, techniques for flipping a classroom.

’ve flipped ever since I started teaching,” recounted FA Upper “ISchool math teacher Alex Burt. “First I started with the final exam review and then I flipped anything that was highly procedural,” he added. One by one, Friends Academy Upper School science and math teachers shared their insights into how and when to flip learning with six outside educators at FA’s first Flipped Class Open House earlier this spring. Chemistry teacher Mark Alber, Math teacher Alex Burt, Chemistry and Biol- AMANDA FISK/friends academy ogy teacher Joe Helpern, Math teacher Science Department head and Assistant Upper School Principal Jen Newitt demonstrates examples of flipped Alec Lash and Biology teacher Jen Ne- learning in a new open house that FA hosted for local educators. witt walked participants through their quizzes the students. own experiences with software such as “With Educanon, a teacher can insert Smart Notes, SnagIt, Educreations and questions into video,” said Alber. “It Jing. definitely helps the students pay atten- The essence of flipped learning tion more,” added Newitt, who has seen involves separating out lecture-type main-class notetaking also reduce student terial into at-home videos that students focus. “It allows us to take the time in can watch at their own pace. class to talk to students extensively,” “Flipping leaves time for more great said Lash. hands-on activities,” promoted Helpern. Upper School science teacher Joe Helpern explains Burt, who is known to insert jokes “There’s more time for both one-on- how to use “SnagIt” to create YouTube at-home into his videos to keep his students videos. one assistance and group discussions. interested, recommends a horse-before- But what sold me was students weren’t staple of videos, Newitt recommended the-cart philosophy. “Don’t flip any- turning to their peers for resources, but free software, Jing and Screencast-o- thing you haven’t taught before.” sticking with the source material.” matic. “Students are able to rewatch While a Flipped classroom will cater Each faculty member presented content – and rewatch before a test,” to differentiated learning, Alber empha- slightly different ways to set up the she said.”It makes class much more sizes that the process won’t necessarily flipped experience. Science Department fun,”added Newitt, who believes this is save time. Head and Biology teacher Jen Newitt an invaluable resource for younger stu- “It is going to take more time and ef- uses SMART Notebook in her class. dents, who sometimes forget questions fort. But in the end, the class is going to She sets up blank online notebooks, in from a previous class. be more fun and active. I’ve been teach- which her students can take notes from The Flipped field continues to grow, ing a long time and most of the ‘new’ her video lectures. “It almost becomes including software that records which things that come up in education can be like another notebook.” To create her students have watched videos and pointless...but this is a keeper.”

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Around the Quad 13 A Time to Come Together

The winning members of the Lower and Middle School ISE chess team. Friends Academy ISE Chess team records first place finish in league he Friends Academy ISE Chess TTeam, comprised of Lower and Middle School students, earned the first place title and was recognized as the “Top Overall Team” for 2014-15.

Middle and Upper School win a bounty of National Language Exam honors ne hundred twenty four OWorld Languages and Cul- tures students scored honors in the National Spanish, French, Latin and Chinese Exams. 13 students scored Gold, 30 in Silver, 22 in Bronze and 39 won Honors for their level in Spanish, French and Latin. Three Latin students received a Magna Cum Laude and one a Cum Laude award. In the Introductory Latin Level, one student received a perfect score, two received purple ribbons and five were awarded Certificates of Merit. In the Chinese Exam, there is no award other than certificates AMANDA FISK/FRIENDS ACADEMY for passing. Only students in the Sponsored by TASQUE, multi-age Community Groups from Kindergarten through 12th grade met a record six times this year to explore Queries together, complete community Chinese III course took the exam service and share experiential activity time. In groups, students created “Settling Jars” and all eight students passed with out of clear mason jars filled with water. Students added various materials, from sand very high scores. Students who are and glitter to multi-colored plastic stars, as they voiced personal challenges and created a turbulence inside the jars. “Managing my time,” offered one student. “Leaving my friend scored as “bilingual” or as “outside who now lives in Massachussets,” said another. “Watching my kids get older.” Then in experience” are scored on a more silence, a student shook the jar and the group watched as the materials settled and the difficult scale. water returned to clear. “This is what happens when we take the time to be still,” summed up the group leader.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 14 The Arts

The All-School Musical Well, well... “Hello, Dolly!” By Andrea Miller Director of Communications

very four or five years, a production crosses the Friends Academy stage that unites the whole school. “This was our fourth all-school musical,E and this time it was unique because it wasn’t an isolated cross-community event. I’d never felt that before,” said Direc- tor of Arts Tracey Foster. Following in the footsteps of Les Miserables, Peter Pan and Carnival, Hello, Dolly! included a huge cast of 90 students from all three divisions, who connected from the start. “Because of all our work in Community groups and Worship buddies throughout the year, as well as cross- divisional work during the summer, the students already had a foundation to build upon. It became Weepy Ermengarde a richer experi- Vandegelder (junior Natalia ence much more Lee) expresses herself. quickly,” said Top, Ernestina Simple (senior Foster. “The Upper School buy-in came so Gloria Fortuna) primps herself much easier because all the Upper School at the Harmonia Gardens students already knew all of the Lower Above, 8th grader Margaux Blau School kids,” she added. Right, Brooke Gardner as Dolly Written in 1964, Hello, Dolly! left its mark on Broadway history as one of its Far right, Brandon Shore most iconic shows, running for a total of and junior Sarah Silverman 2,844 performances. “This show was produced as a big, old-fashioned musical with Right, Cornelius Hackl one purpose in mind... to provide the audi- (senior Alex Nagel), Irene Molloy (senior Sierra ence with an evening of fun, laughter, great Fisher), Minnie Fay (senior music, lots of dancing and enough hijinx to Morgan Rielly) and Barnaby keep you on your toes,” said Foster. Tucker (junior Owen Set in the late 19th century, widowed Collier) turn up the matchmaker Dolly Gallagher Levi (senior elegance. Brooke Gardner) bursts into sleepy Yonkers

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 The Arts 15

with New York City bravado. tant. Under the ever-watchful eye of Dolly, Enlisted to find a wife for the grouchy, the foursome head out for a night on the half-a-millionaire Horace Vandegelder (se- town at the famed (and expensive) Harmo- nior Perry Gordon), Dolly nia Gardens, where they immediately begins to ultimately cross paths weave a plot-thickened with a bewildered and tapestry of merry match- thoroughly grumpy making with one goal at Horace Vandegelder. the end – her betrothal to “We knew it was Horace. time to do an all-school Dolly dispatches musical,” reflected Foster. AMANDA FISK/friends academy Vandegelder to NYC to “And I knew we wanted Lower, Middle and Upper School students relax together as they gather for a final pre-show meeting. see a potential wife – it to be joyous. In picking widowed hat milliner this show, I kept think- “We always try to balance our season,” Irene Molloy (senior ing about the number, said Foster. “One dark and one lighter. The Sierra Fisher). She “Put on Your Sunday more dark, the more light.” sends Vandegelder’s two Clothes,” she added – a The large cast prompted Foster to add unknowing store clerks, AMANDA FISK/friends academy high-energy number, a fourth matinee to the schedule, which Cornelius Hackl (senior Horace Vandergelder (senior Perry Gordon) choreographed by FA added to the students’ transformative Alex Nagel) and Barnaby and Dolly Levi (senior Brooke Gardner) are dance teacher Kimo journey. Tucker (junior Owen opposites who don’t attract ... at first. Kepano, which required a “One of my favorite things about doing Collier) to the same place and the full-ensemble presence. what I do is that we get to experience the criss-crossed arrows of love start to fall. Ironically, this fall’s dark and supernatu- evolution,” explained Foster. “With multiple At Irene’s store, the matches solidify ral thriller, The Right Now, penned by FA shows, the audience will always see that between Cornelius and Irene, and Barnaby Theater teacher Andrew Geha, paved the and Minnie (Morgan Rielly), Irene’s assis- way for Dolly. Continued on Page 16

AMANDA FISK/friends academy The 90-student cast of “Hello, Dolly!” take to the stage to close out Act 1 with the full ensemble number, “Before the Parade Passes By.”

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 16 The Arts

The All-School Musical

The waiters of Harmonia Gardens stole the show with their fast-paced and furious dance numbers choreographed by FA dance teacher Kimo Kepano.

have to work really hard not to rest on that, well,” she said. Dolly’s huge set drew help but to contain your excitement and move it from all corners. “The set is the biggest set forward. The third night? we’ve ever built. It was by That’s the time you can Stagecraft students under take your performance to the direction of Technical a really joyful place. The Director Michael Grant; a play escalates to a point lot of alumni also returned that has more depth and to help.” joy.” Looking back on the According to Foster, the show, Foster continues to added matinee challenged marvel at the relationships AMANDA FISK/friends academy the cast to deal with that grew between all the The School Girls: Ife Anyoku, Kayla Koroma, exhaustion and perfor- students. Alesandra Lipman, Lauren Nagel, Grace Sands and Helena Ware mance. “You learn how to “Because of the snow balance yourself and how delays, we were still work- Continued from Page 15 to keep yourself where ing out set changes and you need to be between last-minute details for the evolution and I think that’s wonderful.” the two shows,” said Fos- first performance. At one From props to wardrobe to choreography, ter. “It’s very similar to be- point during the show, the blocking, cues and audience energy, each ing in a playoff situation. piano bench got left on show built upon the last one. You have to pace yourself stage and I saw a Lower “From a performer’s perspective, each and you can’t stop think- AMANDA FISK/friends academy schooler run out and try to night of the show does something different ing or think you have it,” Head costume designer Pia Fleischmann lift it. It probably weighed adjusts Dolly’s glittering ballgown. Dolly for you,” said Foster. she remarked. called for hundreds of costumes as most twice as much as she did, “The first night, your brain has to work One of the joys for performers needed more than one. but she was going to get really hard to control the adrenaline and it Foster is that many of the that thing off the stage, no gears you up in a specific way that stretches students from Middle and Upper School matter what! An Upper schooler came and you. The second night, you start thinking have been involved with theater from their helped her and together they finished the actively about the show – what things to time in Lower School. job. That kind of thing went on all night. It fix. If you felt success the night before, you “The show supported their work so was wonderful!”

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 The Arts 17

GSS Germany The Middle/Upper School Jazz Band

AMANDA FISK PHOTOS/friends academy Junior Owen Collier What is the price of freedom? These AMANDA FISK PHOTOS/friends academy American and German The Upper School Jazz Band belts it out. students find out iddle and ast year, American, French and German high school students MUpper School Lperformed the Normandy Peace Jazz Bands left it all Project at the 70th Anniversary of D-Day. This year, returning and new out there this March FA students, along with two veteran for their annual Portledge students reunited with the German group to perform a sequel combined Jazz peace project entitled, “What is the Concert. The Price of Freedom?” Written entirely by the American Beginning Jazz and German students, the collaborative Band, Middle School bilingual piece employs movement and vocals to send the message that peace is Jazz Band, Upper possible. School Jazz Band As part of the FA Global Studies Too cool for jazz, members of the Middle School Jazz Band leave room for solos. Scholars Program, FA students will and the Gospel Choir travel to Heiligenstadt, a city formerly performed a selection part of East Germany, to continue their important efforts for peace and to per- of styles ranging form the hour long project in late June. from Swing, Funk, Rock, Latin Jazz and Gospel.

AMANDA FISK PHOTOS/friends academy The Upper School Jazz Band string section German and American students from Friends and Portledge deliver a stirring performance.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 18 Feature Story

Diversifying Diversity K I N DE RGART E I TS S E LF PORTRA

Friends charts new directions to explore issues of inclusion and identity

By Andrea Miller Director of Communications

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Feature Story 19

Diversifying Diversity

rench toast,” shared one Kindergartner. ou’re about to witness a “living-room” conversation among Black “Honey...” added men (three alums: Jon Ramsay ‘12, Jeff Daniels ‘90 and Rob Abney ‘05, and another. “Chocolate... “Y Peaches. Butter- one current administrator: Mike Quinland, FA School Psychologist). The goal of this scotch... Peanut but- program is to have students hear the experiences of Black men in the Friends ter,” four more thoughtfully expressed. community: their feelings about the Mike Brown and Eric Garner cases, their views “FThis fall, Kindergartners explored some as a father and how they have explained these incidents to their children (and the favorite food words and learned how to use necessity of having to do so), their experiences as students at FA, and much more... them in the context of each other. “We tweaked the whole Social Studies curriculum this year They are making their lives transparent to us in an attempt to open up a to reflect diversity,” said Kindergarten teacher larger conversation as a school about why all of this matters.” Jennifer Ferreira. After discussing the science of appearance – Director of Diversity and Multicultural Affairs Shanelle Robinson – how skin color is affected by melanin and the regions of the world, Kindergartners dove into the book, The Colors of Us. “We gave them new language that helped them understand that we are not really black and white, we are shades of brown and tan,” said Ferreira, who helped students mix paint to find and label the colors of their skin, hair and eye color. Ferreira, who serves on the eight-member Lower School Diversity Committee helped create diversity programming for Lower School faculty, along with Niki Desai, co-committee member and third grade teacher. “At the beginning of the year, we did things to get to know each other,” said Ferreira. “We AMANDA FISK/friends academy discovered that we really didn’t ‘know, know’ From left, Jon Ramsay ’12, FA School Psychologist Mike Quinland, Rob Abney ’05 and parent and trustee Jeff Daniels ’90 each other and this was a great way to build our in the classroom.” name was my father’s last name (Shah),” shared community,” she added. As part of the Upper School’s student-run Desai. “When I got married, I was expected to Ferreira and Desai introduced units that diversity efforts, Desai was asked this spring to change my middle name to my husband’s first faculty could bring back to their classrooms, present about the faith she practices, Jainism, name and take his last name (Desai) as well. I including an examination of at Upper School Meeting for decided instead to keep my father’s first name each other’s names and fam- Worship. as my middle name. A lot of Indian women in ily traditions. Carlie Tietjen, “We gave them “I’m brown and if I hadn’t my generation are either hyphenating their the Lower School Learning new language given that talk at the Meeting last name or keeping their maiden name. They Specialist and co-committee that helped them House, a lot of people would are also giving their daughters a female middle member, also presented on have thought I practice Islam name. Discussing this with my students helped intellectual diversity, in understand that we and celebrate Ramadan,” said them to understand that names are important,” terms of learning differences are not really black Desai. “Appearance is not as said Desai. in students. and white, we are important as knowing some- Continued on Page 20 “This presentation alone, knowing about their lowed us to see through the shades of brown culture and their family.” students’ eyes when they are and tan.” In her third grade class, really struggling,” said Desai. – jennifer ferreira Desai connected cultural “We filled out a survey to see identity to language and ge- what kind of learners we are.” ography by having students For Desai and Ferreira, share their cultural backgrounds, map them language is key when teaching students about and then study similarities based on geography. diversity. “We are giving students the language “We also played the Middle Name Game, where to work things out – and things they are already students wrote their names down on index talking about,” said Ferreira. cards, shuffled them into a basket and tried to “As a community, we need to ask questions,” match them to each other.” Desai used the activ- stated Desai. “It’s dangerous to make assump- ity to delve into her own culture. AMANDA FISK/friends academy tions. And the only thing that can break down “I explained about my middle name, which Lama Tenzin explains the art of the Sand Mandala to those assumptions is having these conversations is my father’s first name (Ashvin). My maiden students during Peace Week.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 20 Feature Story

Diversifying Diversity Courageous Conversations in our Community eginning in Fall 2015, Courageous Conversations Bin our Community (CCC) is a series of programs that will offer members of our school community (students, parents, faculty, and staff) opportunities to engage in intercultural dialogue about multicultural issues impacting our school and society. Courageous Conversations in our Community (CCC) programs are based AMANDA FISK/friends academy This fall, FA families gathered at the Gurdwara Sahib Sikh Temple in Glen Cove for the annual Diversity Night event. Director of Diversity on the premise that and Multicultural having meaningful Continued from Page 19 being pulled over by police,” explained Director Affairs Shanelle intergroup dialogue The visit of Lama Tenzin Yignyen, a fully of Diversity and Multicultural Affairs Shanelle Robinson will direct and education Robinson. the new series. ordained Buddhist monk and professor at is necessary to Hobart and Williams Smith Colleges, gave “The audience heard from people they knew promote and sustain equitable and multi- Desai another cross-cultural opportunity. and respected – their classmate’s dad, former FA cultural school communities. “I was able to teach a unit on Buddhism and students and current faculty. These were people Through Courageous Conversations in the students were really excited about it,” she they knew and could relate to, but had never our Community (CCC), we will examine said. “This prompted us to learn how to say heard them share their personal experiences in the impact of multiple social identities, hello in different languages.” that way,” added Robinson. such as: race, gender, religion, sexual At the start of the school “The film struck Response after the “Liv- orientation, socioeconomic class status, year, national events from ing Room Conversation” etc., and work together as a school com- Ferguson to Staten Island, a nerve...it’s program was overwhelm- munity to improve cross-group relations prompted school-wide intended to be ingly positive. “Students and and understanding. conversation. In response provocative.” faculty told me this was the Friends sponsored several best assembly they saw this opportunities for dialogue – Shanelle Robinson year,” noted Robinson. and discussion including a “It was unstructured and Coming to Parent Coffee, “How to talk unfiltered conversation and Friends Academy – to children about what’s hap- different from discussing pening in Ferguson, MO,” a Ferguson, which at times felt Fall 2015 candlelight peace vigil, Upper threatening,” said Robinson. School Lunch and Learns Friends dove into a and the widely received “Liv- discussion of civil rights In 2014-15, parents explored gender identity ing Room Conversation” for history in January when the in “Parenting Beyond Upper School students and Middle and Upper School Pink & Blue.” faculty. communities took part in “‘Living Room Conversa- a group screening of the tion’ was a chance for stu- Oscar-winning film,Selma , dents and faculty to listen to at the culmination of Peace and observe four Black men, Week. FA rented out the Friends hosted film screenings to of different ages from the FA parents and students on April 1. Glen Cove Theater in order community, talk about their to seat over 500 students and experiences in the world faculty and then sponsored – their feelings and fears classroom conversation fol- about police shootings of unarmed Black men, lowing the film. explaining that to their own children, dealing Using guided questions within small groups, with stereotypes, and their own experiences of students and teachers explored the history of

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Feature Story 21

Diversifying Diversity civil rights, public protest, the role of white al- Afterward, parents split into pairs to answer munity is still on its journey. “It’s an ongoing lies, the possible parallels between 1965 and to- pre-set questions about childhood gender roles process and it’s hard. But that doesn’t mean we day and each participant was asked to consider and challenges, and meeting or defying those don’t do it,” she said. a time he or she had stood up to injustice. roles. “We must keep talking,” urged Robinson. The path of difficult dialogue was not always In January, the parent coffee, “The ABCs of “Sustain the dialogue and continue the con- a smooth one this year. LGBT: Defining and Demystifying Differences versation about all types In April, FA hosted parent and student with Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity,” of diversity. How do you screenings of I’m Not Racist...Am explored terminology and continue to lean in and I?, a new film that explored the myths, and parents shared per- learn when it gets difficult?” journey nine NYC teens took sonal beliefs and experiences. asked Robinson. as part of a diversity workshop, “I really appreciated how “That’s when we have the sponsored by The Calhoun everyone present remained tendency to shut down. How School. The screenings drew up- respectful of one another do we stay in?” wards of 65 parents and students. and leaned into the discom- Back in Kindergarten, Fer- Powerful and controversial, the fort around this topic,” said reira underscores the impor- film was shown in full to parents Liza Talusan, former FA faculty and Robinson. tance of teaching diversity at and students before and after Director of Diversity at The Park Next year, Robinson is hoping a young age. “It’s important school, and excerpts of the film School of Baltimore is featured in to delve deeper into more LGBT for us to give children those were shown at an assembly to the the film, I’m Not Racist...Am I? and programming, and also issues of social skills. In the end, it’s full Upper School student body. moderated the FA screening. class and religion. Above, Kinder- a skill. Just like Math and “I’m Not Racist...Am I? struck a nerve ... it’s Coming this fall, Friends Academy will garten teacher Reading, it’s a skill we have Jennifer Ferreira; intended to be provocative,” said Robinson. launch a reworked structure of diversity to teach children, so that bottom, third “Reactions ran the gamut, from people who workshops and coffees with a new initiative, grade teacher they know how to navigate enjoyed it to people who didn’t, and some who “Courageous Conversations in our Community Niki Desai through our world.” felt isolated. Those who saw the whole film got (CCC).” Throughout the year, students, parents, “When people who are its full context,” shared Robinson. faculty and staff will come together to examine not aware of other cultures are educated, they “But the end goal was reached, another op- the impact of multiple social identities, from are able to find connections. In a small school portunity for our community to have open and race, gender, religion, sexual orientation, like this, when we are talking about commu- honest dialogue about diversity issues head-on, socieconomic class status and others to improve nity, it starts with that. Building connections, even when it’s difficult,” said Robinson. “These cross-group relations and understanding. awareness and putting it into action,” finished conversations aren’t always going to be easy, but Robinson understands that the Friends com- Desai. they’re necessary.” Dr. Howard Stevenson agrees. Stevenson, a visiting professor from the University of Penn- sylvania, joined FA faculty at their February in-service day. Stevenson worked with faculty to examine racial literacy and racial stress – the emotional and physical toll that racism can cause. Stevenson’s new book, Promoting Racial Literacy in Schools, teaches educators, community leaders and parents “how to emotionally resolve face-to-face racially stressful encounters.” As Director of Diversity, Robinson offers programs that address various forms of diversity. In October, Early Childhood parents were invited to a Lunch and Learn about gender entitled, “Parenting Beyond Pink & Blue: How to raise your kids free of gender stereotypes.” “This workshop was timed intentionally around Halloween and asked questions of parents, such as, ‘Would you be comfortable if your son wanted to wear a princess costume for Halloween?” said Robinson. Using What Would You Do videos, which featured unsuspecting parents overhearing a staged situation between a “parent” and “son” selecting costumes in a store, Robinson guided Students attending the BRiDGE Program pose for a selfie with Director of Diversity and Multicultural Affairs Shanelle the conversation through and around societal Robinson and I’m Not Racist...Am I? film producer André Robert Lee. The BRiDGE Program is a cultural retreat for FA and personal expectations about gender. students of color in grades 6-12.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 22 Sports: Go FA!

{Winter 2015}

Xxxxxxxx

ALAN QUACKENBUSH/friends academy

Triumph and hard work. Perseverance and close calls. Battling it out in the top Class A division, Winter Sports athletes gave their all.

Top row: McClain Pascucci, Christian Barakat and Paige Duca; Middle row: Lindsay O’Sullivan, Julianne Florez and Lauren LeoGrande; Bottom row: JD Baptiste, Andy Muran and Glenn Lostritto.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Sports: Go FA! 23

FA 2014-15 Winter Sports Conference co-champions

ALAN QUACKENBUSH/friends academy Senior Alexis Toles drives down the court. ALAN QUACKENBUSH/friends academy Senior Narain Badhey prepares for a shot. Varsity Boys Basketball: Met Challenging “Class A” Team meets Competition with Strong Team Chemistry competitive he Boys Varsity Basketball team concluded the regular season with an exciting victory over West Hempstead. The win clinched a tie for the A5 division head on conference championship and the opportunity to host the playoff game. Played on our home court the Quakers unfortunately came up just short Girls Varsity Basketball: inT a 54-52 season finale vs. Roslyn. This year the team was promoted to the challeng- Team-Building Year ing Class A division. he move to conference A from confer- “We would like to thank all the fans and are very proud of how the entire FA Tence B-C proved to be very chal- community represented themselves in a very intense and hard-fought atmosphere,” lenging this season for the Varsity Girls Basketball team. The departure of many said Coach Steve Hefele, whose team finished individual awards the season with an overall record of 11-7 and senior starters last year opened up space for ALL–COUNTY – Cyrus Holder many new faces on this year’s roster. a conference record of 10-2. and Thomas Frey “Although our record within the confer- The regular season was filled with many ALL–CONFERENCE – JD Baptiste, ence was not what we hoped it would be, challenges as the team strived to mold 16 indi- And Cory Goldglit many of our losses were close,” said Coach viduals into one team. Team members worked Mike Indovino. “We were certainly in most on developing leadership, character and chemistry between each other. of our games this year. The toughest was “More important than our won and loss record and how far we went in the the double-overtime loss to Mineola on playoffs are the life lessons,” shared Coach Hefele. “We learned the importance of re- senior night. Although we will graduate six specting the people we are working with. We might not have the same background seniors this year, many of our core players or outlook on life, but we respect the way we are and we work together to achieve a will be returning next year,” he added. common goal. We are humble in victory and gracious in defeat. By understanding According to Coach Indovino, that depth coupled with the experience of the importance and adhering to these principles, we have had a successful season,” playing in the new more competitive he finished. conference will help the team next year. 2015 ROSTER: Narain Badhey, JD Baptiste, Brian Thomas Frey, Merek Glover, Corey Goldglit, “The girls should be very proud of their Chiang, Jordan Christian, Julian Christian, Jack Cyrus Holder, Tau Holder, Gregory Petrossian, Deutsch, Trevor Dineen, Matthew Feinstein, Brandon Rosenbaum, Tyler Sehring and Gavin Tam. Continued on Page 24

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 24 Sports: Go FA!

FA 2014-15 Winter Sports Continued from Page 23 efforts this season, they never quit. It is a testament to their athletic abilities and determination. I was proud to be a part of this program.”

individual awards All County and academic all-star – Lindsay O’Sullivan All Conference – alexis toles TEAM scholar-athlete – julia ciardullo

Junior scores 1,000th point eading into the Dec. 9th basketball Hmatch-up between Friends and Long Beach, junior Lindsay O’Sullivan was a little on the anxious side. And she had reason for it. Nine away from reaching a ALAN QUACKENBUSH/friends academy career-high of 1,000 points, O’Sullivan was Senior Connor Lavin protects the puck. poised to make FA history in that game. “It was very exciting,” recounted the ‘Varsity-level’ performance Lady Quakers’ point forward, who has been a Varsity basketball player at FA since Varsity Ice Hockey: of the players for their continued work 8th grade. “I was a little nervous going into Young Program Reaches ethic and for their determination, even the game, but once I got on the court I was Playoffs in 2nd Year after the sub-par beginning to the year. The fine.” team and coaches would also like to thank Three or four minutes into the 2nd he Friends Academy Varsity Hockey managers and parents for their unwavering quarter, O’Sullivan was fouled. “I sunk the Tteam experienced an unprecedented support as we continue our playoff run,” first shot and missed the second. My team- success in its second year as a true varsity added Coach Pamuk. mate rebounded the ball and passed it to program. Led by a core group of seniors, the team 2015 ROSTER: Christian Barakat, Jason Baskind, me,” she said. “I drove to the basket, put the Hao Zheng Chen, Julian Coleman, Struan Coleman, shot up and missed.” Quickly, O’Sullivan was able to regroup after a rocky start and Pierce DellaFera, William Evans, Connor Febesh, grabbed back her own rebound, took an- qualify for both the county and New York Peter Fornell, Eric Friedlander, Andrew Greene, other shot and scored the final point. State playoffs. Theodore Ingrassia, Connor Lavin, James Morgan, A nail-biting game televised on MSG Kole Rossi, William Schneider, Jack Statfeld, Max- Varsity, as well as a heated victory against well Sutherland, Daniel Tauter and Cameron Wang. crosstown rivals Locust Valley were among this season’s highlights. The Quakers opened the county playoffs FA fans with another victory over Locust Valley, as helped make they swept them 4-0 in a shutout, but fell the Varsity Ice Hockey in subsequent rounds. season a “It was the team’s goal from the onset success. of this season to raise a banner inside the Gym – something that is still well within

ALAN QUACKENBUSH/friends academy reach,” said Coach Sven Pamuk. Junior Lindsay O’Sullivan is the first FA athlete to “The coaching staff is enormously proud reach 1,000 points in a high school career. The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Sports: Go FA! 25

FA 2014-15 Winter Sports Season of success Varsity Winter Track: with senior Glenn Lostritto qualified for Individuals and Relay Team the March 7th State Meet at Cornell. Qualify for States 2015 ROSTER: Michael Bernardini, Grace Burrus, Amelia Cardone, Julianne Cottone, Emma he Friends Academy Varsity Winter Deutsch, Paige Duca, Gabrielle FitzGerald, Ethan TTrack and Field team had a year of Flicker, Simran Ghool, Stephen Graham, Alexandra many successes. Hoffman, Katherine Hom, Bailey Hughes, Sloane “The boys and girls worked very hard Hughes, Alexandria Hutzel, Patrick Kavan, Jennifer and with their hard work came some great Keogh, Glenn Lostritto, Rhea Nagpal, Brendan Naughton, Lily Neisloss, Anna Pappas, Riona Park, results,” said Coach Lauren Carballo. Madison Rielly, Jacob Rush, Catherine Sullivan, This season, five athletes achieved All- Eleana Tsiamtsiouris, Victoria Wu, Christina Conference Honors, two of whom were Yannello and Stephen Zerilli. conference champions in two events, and ALAN QUACKENBUSH/friends academy two athletes achieved All-County honors, individual awards Ka’Juan Polley runs down court. both of whom were county champions. All Conference – Paige Duca JV Boys Basketball: This year the team also featured two (1000m, 600m) – Conference Champ Team Plays Hard in New Class individuals and one relay team that quali- in both, Glenn Lostritto (1600m, fied for the State Qualifier Meet. “I am 1000m) – Conference Champ in he JV Boys basketball season this year very proud to work with such a group both, Catherine Sullivan (1000m), Tcan be summed up in three words: of athletes that are so hard-working and Katherine Hom (300m), Gabrielle “Character and hard work.” This season talented,” added Coach Carballo. Fitzgerald (1500m Racewalk) the boys were faced with many tough In late winter, senior Paige Duca quali- All-County Class – Paige Duca games due to our move up to class A. fied for the Millrose Games, one of the (1000m, 1500m) – County Class B The JV Quakers handled it with much most prestigious indoor track and field Champ, Glenn Lostritto (1600m) – poise and perseverance. “A lot of our suc- events in the U.S. Additionally, Paige, along County Class B Champ cess this season had to do with the growth of our players from last year and how they matured on the court. We then added our new incoming athletes who lent their own character to the team. With the combination of the two, it all blended into one great team,” said Coach Matt Simeone. From the first day of the season, the team was instilled with the passion to work hard and learned it would get them a long way. As a team, they prided themselves on defense. Working hard on the boards and the defensive side of the ball was the deciding factor in many games this season. Every night it was a different player making a big play and contributing to the team and the victory. “I am very proud of all the hard work the boys put into this season. We had a lot of fun and I wish the boys the best in their spring seasons,” said Coach Simeone. 2015 ROSTER: Charles Andolina, Kevin Baskind, Derek Chiang, Louis Durante, Casey Glover, Daniel McCooey, Samuel Mufson, Christopher Nishimura, Joseph Pascucci, Maclain Pascucci, Ka’Juan Polley, Stephen Popoola, Jared Rosenbaum ALAN QUACKENBUSH/friends academy and Ryan Tam. Jennifer Keogh leads the pack at a winter track meet. The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 26 Sports: Go FA!

FA 2014-15 Winter Sports JV Girls Basketball: Huge Wins he Girls JV Basketball team played Tstrong throughout the entire 2014- 2015 season. Each athlete was able to further develop her basketball skills and elevate the team’s game to a higher level. One of the highlights of the season was playing Mineola HS. “This was a game where everything seemed to flow,” said Coach Amanda Serif. “The shots were going in, the defense stopped our opponent, and the energy was high,” she said. Friends Academy ended up winning that game by 7 points. Another highlight of the Lady Quakers’ season happened during the game against Island Trees. ALAN QUACKENBUSH/friends academy “In the first game against this team, we Friends Academy’s new Varsity Squash team lost by a wide margin,” recalled Coach Serif. “However, in the second game, the team showed true determination and skill Individual achievements lift team by battling the entire match. The score Varsity Squash: These tests produced gut-level strength, was back and forth all game and the team Finishes 7th out of 16 from sophomore and #2 player Alex Mer- played their best game all season.” rill, among many others. Though the team According to Coach Serif, this year’s at Nationals finished seventh of 16 teams in Division team exhibited exactly what it means to oted cultural theorist IV at Nationals, the tournament featured a be a team. “They worked together success- and philosopher Michele close victory 4-3 over Malvern Prep, with fully, cheered for their teammates, and Foucault once posited that junior Eva Mularkey delivering the decid- had each other’s back at all times. I look “N the functional end-point of modernity ing match in a gutty, five-game test. forward to seeing the future accomplish- was the Panopticon, a prison designed by Junior Grant Elgarten similarly won ments of these athletes.” Jeremy Bentham in which all the prisoners a five-gamer against Greenwich High 2015 ROSTER: Marina Hilbert, Lauren could see each other. For a nascent squash School, coming back from 2-1 down. At LeoGrande, Noelle Munao, Kelsey Nathan, Sophia program, its first year as a varsity, one of the National Tournament senior Captain Pavlakis, Vanessa Quinland, Kristina Sanoulis, the goals of the FA team in 2014-15 was Andrew Muran finished undefeated in Julia-Kate Schamroth, Paige Silverstein, Sydney Themelis and Emily Wachtler. to both see and be seen. For Foucault and three matches, preserving a perfect record Bentham, it would be the Panopticon’s in interscholastic competition as an FA mixture of freedom and restraint that athlete. would define modern life. For the FA If the 2015 version of the team was squash team in 2014-15, players found about confronting some of the limitations themselves in a similarly empowered and and freedoms of a growing program, the constrained position. future surely looked to deconstruct these Moving to a varsity program produced frameworks. The team would like to thank increased visibility and surely came with Aggie Jones and Alan Quackenbush for attendant spectacle. After placing second in their committed efforts on our behalf, as the bottom division of the National tour- well as our team parents who traveled to nament in 2014, the 2015 iteration of the support us this season.” team moved up to Division IV, preparing – Coach Geoff Nelson to tangle with more established programs. 2015 ROSTER: Robert Carroll, Grant Elgarten, Some of the regular season hardened the Samuel Kahane, Tanner Kellan, Alexander Merrill, team for these eventualities, including long Thomas Mocorrea, Eva Mullarkey, Andrew Muran, road trips to Poly Prep and Hackley, and Robert Parker, Gabriel Patino, Kyle Rosenbluth, Nicholas Schneider, Caroline Sgaglione and ALAN QUACKENBUSH/friends academy the type of team-bonding that only inter- William Shea. Managers: Sarah O’Kane and Eva Freshman Sophia Pavlakis eludes defenders. minable hours on the BQE can provide. Valcic.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 2015 FA Auction 27 {Scenes from the The 23rd Annual Friends Academy Dinner & Auction} By Diane Biolsi Director of Annual Fund and Special Events he Friends Academy Annual Dinner and Auction was held T on Thursday, March 26th at the historic Oheka Castle in Huntington for the second year in a row. “A Cel- ebration with Friends” drew over 360 parents, alumni, former parents and faculty for an evening of fun and good cheer to support a great cause – Friends Academy. The gala generated $621,828 to benefit our children, an all-time record. Phaedra Kazanas, Amy Schamroth and Allison Weight served as our Auction Chairs. Their leadership, hard work and attention to detail truly created a night to remember for the FA community. The success of this year’s 2015 AUCTION COMMITTEE: (Chairs) Phaedra Kazanas, Amy Schamroth, Allison Weight (above); (Committee, not Auction is attributed to the grassroots shown) Jennifer Adoni, Rebecca Baadarani, Maureen Bergmann, Kim Griffiths Broder, Sima Carnevale, Effie Neofi- tos-Campbell, Michelle Ling Cherenfant, Carole Anne Cottone, Lisa Crowley, Stacy Crutch, Debra Del Vecchio, Mary efforts by the Auction Committee to Emlock, Krystal Forde, Sarah Goldblatt, Deana Grella, Kim Guo, Lisabeth Harris, Molly Henry, Wendy Hirshfield, sell more journal ads and increase the Randi-Sue Hoyt, Margaret Hutzel, Gina Jaklitsch, Anna Janczyk, Loren Kaler, Julie Kalimian, Pam Keefer, Archana Khetan, Yoko Kusama, Debra Krypell, Bokhee Lee, Suzanne McCooey, Alison McGowan, Carolyn Mott, Joanne number of sponsors in advance of the Panagopoulos, Nicky Pratt, Golnoosh Ghatri Rak, Juliana Riviezzo, Anji Rossi, Roberta Rotberg, Aimee Roti, event. The dinner was graciously spon- Kate Rubenacker, Debra Russell, Michelle Sbiroli, Michelle Statfeld, Lisa Sutherland, Sandra Themelis, Diane Valcic, sored by Debby and Scott Rechler and Shu Xu and Jie Wang, Evelyn Wilkins, Jennifer Williams and Veronica Wu. an anonymous donor. The elegant evening began with cock- tails and appetizers as guests browsed the vast selection of Silent Auction items, which included travel packages, fashion accessories, sporting events and unique internships for our students donated by the FA community. The Upper School Jazz Band led by Joe Romano provided an encore performance. A sit-down dinner and Live Auction, which proved to be the highlight of the evening, was conducted by Jed Morey ’90, who returned as Auctioneer for his fourth year. Some of the Live Auction’s biggest ticket items included a trip to Italy, the Kentucky Derby, lunch for two in Martha’s Vine- Clockwise from top: A view of the dining room; outgoing Co-President of the Board Scott Rechler and his wife, Debby yard by private plane, exclusive oppor- are honored; auctioneer Jed Morey ’90 takes control of the podium; Xxxxxx, Xxxxxx and Xxxxx pick up their Mystery Boxes; FA music teacher Joe Romano swings the Upper School Jazz Band into action. tunities to spend the day with fashion designer Zac Posen and Sean Hannity, Johnnie Walker, to mention a few. The Academy. a Murder Mystery party at the historic Auction Scholarship Endowment Fund Please mark your calendar for the 24th La Selva property in Upper Brookville raised $77,400 to support children who Annual Dinner and Auction on Thursday, and a scotch-tasting event hosted by need financial assistance to attend Friends April 7, 2016!

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 28 Faculty Milestones

Former Faculty Professional Development & Milestones Faculty Notes Wetherell writes, “I’d posit that Leno and Letterman represent two stark takes on what “funny” is. The difference is far greater than the varying ways in which both comedians (and they did both get their starts in stand-up comedy) are so often rendered cartoonish: a chin like a ski-jump; a smile that, as they used to say of Eleanor Roosevelt, Upper School could bite an apple through English teacher a picket fence. No, the most Brad Wetherell important, though perhaps least obvious, difference between Leno and Former maintenance staff member Greg Reid Letterman’s two approaches to the late night debuted his most recent show in Harlem. television variety show is the way each host appeals to his particular audience in his Former maintenance staff member Greg own way. The significance of this difference Reid’s first art show in Harlem opened is rooted in something we often take for this winter at the Tikhonova & Winter granted: why we watch the shows we watch.” Gallery. If you are familiar with Greg’s Read the full essay at http://www.salon. art, his most recent collection of masks com/2015/05/06/we_need_david_lettermans_ may be some of his best work yet! The america_how_the_lenofalloncolbert_ show opened in January and ran thru Upper School art teacher Allison Doherty displays one choice_defines_us_and_how_we_see_the_ March 22nd. of her paintings from her art residency this April in world/#comments. Ireland. Former faculty member Alex Edwards- Director of Diversity and Multicultural Upper School Art teacher Allison Doherty Bourdrez is proof that one can be a Affairs Shanelle Robinson presented at two was accepted for a week-long Art Educator’s grandparent at 35 years old! Kamryn conferences this winter and spring. Residency at Cow House Studios, in Mary Edwards-Bourdrez was born At the People of Color Conference in southeastern Ireland during spring break. March 19, 2015, in Boston. Alex December, Robinson gave three different Still functioning as a family farm, several continues to work with Bare Bones workshops. The first session, former cow sheds have been turned into state Theater in Northport. “Where the Rubber Meets of the art studios and residences for artists. the Road! How Do We Her studio space was spacious and light- Take a Stand Against the filled, although she took advantage of the ‘N-Word’ in Our Schools?” mild weather to work outside as often as she interactively guided could. “There were three other art teachers Director of participants through the in residence, along with five dogs, two barn Diversity and process that three schools cats, and a majestic peacock, all belonging Multicultural (William Penn Charter to the owners who lived next door. From Affairs Shanelle School, Friends Select the moment I arrived, it was evident that Robinson and Friends Academy) the animals had the run of the place!” said underwent to ban the use of the “N-Word” Doherty. from their campuses. “My Sisters’/Brothers’ It’s easy to see why Ireland is called the Keeper...” A Roundtable Discussion on the Emerald Isle, as Allison and the other artists Role of Historically Black Greek Letter were surrounded by lush fields in every shade Organizations in Independent Schools of green imaginable. Moss and ferns were outlined how independent schools can use everywhere, and hedgerows of flowering BGLOs to transform their diversity efforts. yellow gorse added touches of yellow to the Along with Dr. Eddie Moore, Robinson landscape. presented,“There’s no such thing as the Upper School English teacher Brad ‘N-Word’: A critical examination of the word Wetherell’s essay about David Letterman’s in literature, pop culture, sports and more.” retirement appeared in a recent issue of In April, Robinson presented at the Salon. Entitled, “We need David Letterman’s NYSAIS Diversity Conference on “REEL America: How the Leno/Fallon/Colbert Diversity: Using Media Literacy as a Tool choice defines us and how we see the world,” for Diversity/Equity Work,” where she taught Wetherell ponders the meaning of what participants how to evaluate media messages Former faculty member Alex Edwards-Bourdrez “funny” is and how it is defined by different and understand the role media plays in the holds his (first) granddaughter Kamryn. generations. social construction of identity and difference.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 A Quaker Education: A Gift For Life

e are grateful to all who choose to Wsupport the uniqueness of a Quaker education and the mission of Gideon Frost by making Friends Academy a charitable priority. Your generosity helps to create a community that is committed to building strong minds and kind hearts throughout our entire student body.

Thank you for Making a Difference in the Lives of Our Children www.fa.org/give | (516) 393–4269

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 30 Alumni News

from the

presidentPeter Stein ’79

Dear Fellow Alumni, set up and contributions can be made through the FA The beautiful spring weather is sure to provide an Development Office. idyllic backdrop for the Class of 2015’s final days! Looking ahead to the summer, on July 29, the FA They will go out with the same style and grace that Alumni Association will celebrate its first annual “Boys characterized their years at FA. Soon they will be of Summer” event. Alumni will gather in the hitting the books at some of the finest colleges and magnificent suites at CitiField for an evening of food, universities across the nation. festivities and, of course, baseball to watch the Mets The spring was also highlighted by play the San Diego Padres. A limited num- another exciting New York City Reunion ber of tickets is available. For tickets or more for 250+ alumni! This annual event grows information, contact Alumni Board member larger each year and has become a rite of Rebecca Pacchiano ‘07 at rebeccaleigh17@ spring. The Princeton/Columbia Club gmail.com. We look forward to making this an was overflowing with FA Alumni on June annual alumni event. 1st, and it appeared as though all had a This issue of The Meeting House features an great time. We honored 3 longstanding FA article close to home for me! On page 32, read faculty – Judy James, Lillian Shulman, and about alumni and faculty Quaker wedding Sharon Nelson. ceremonies. It’s an article that is sure to be March featured one of the more memo- talked about in the future. Peter Stein ’79, rable events in recent memory at FA. On a Finally, the weekend of October 2-4 marks Friends Academy chilly spring day, the Matinecock Meeting our 51st Fall Fair and Homecoming. Classes Alumni House was overflowing with former ending in 5 and 0 will celebrate special Association students, parents, current and former reunions. We are expecting a big gathering President faculty and staff, and friends of beloved from our 50-year reunion class of 1965! English and art history teacher Roger Also, for all classes from 1965 and earlier, Erickson. A Meeting for Remembrance in Mr. please join us for our second annual Gideon’s Guard Erickson’s honor was held on March 7th, followed by a Luncheon on October 3 at noon at the Fall Fair. Last luncheon. Numerous memories and stories were shared year’s luncheon was a huge success and we are expecting about this remarkable teacher and person. The legend- an even bigger turnout this year! ary faculty at FA such as Mr. Erickson is what helps I wish you all a warm, relaxing summer filled with make Friends such a wonderfully special place for its peace. current students and leaves us alumni with such great memories. A special fund in Mr. Erickson’s memory has been

Help us help you and your fellow alums stay connected Send us your news and address Connect by website: Are you on Facebook? 1 and e–mail updates: 2 3 FA's password-protected Alumni If you love Friends, like us! Head Alumni Office Community: www.fa.org/alumni to www.facebook.com/ Friends Academy Click on ALUMNI DIRECTORY friendsacademyNY for more 270 Duck Pond Road to search for classmates by last campus life photos, alumni Locust Valley, NY 11560 name, maiden name, class year and updates and behind-the-scenes [email protected]; 516-465-1796 profession. stories and videos. *If you do not know your username and password, e–mail Kathy Fox in the Alumni Office: [email protected].

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Alumni News 31

Friends Academy Alumni Association Alumni are the living legacy of Friends Academy. Class of 1965

50th Reunion! Reconnect at FA's Largest Community Event Special Reunion Celebrations for Classes Ending in 5 and 0

Fall Fair & Homecoming 25th Reunion! October 2–4, 2015 Friday: 50th Reunion Luncheon for the Class of 1965

Friday night: Class gatherings

Saturday: Fall Fair, followed by the Alumni Tailgate and homecoming Reception on campus for all alumni.

Saturday night: Reunion Dinners off campus for classes ending in 5 and 0.

Sunday: Meeting for Worship in Matinecock Meeting House Class of 1990 Volunteers in classes planning special reunions will reach out to classmates soon. More information will be posted on the alumni pages of the FA website: www.fa.org/alumni. Contact Kathy Fox in the Alumni Office with questions: [email protected] or 516–465–1796.

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 32 Alumni Profiles Once upon a Herb and Rene Lape Quaker Wedding

Phebe Willits Bergenheim ’67 and Richard Bergenheim

Alumni and faculty reminisce about their wedding day ake a trip down Memory Lane with 10 alumni and faculty who, inspired by their Quaker path and experiences, chose a Quaker wedding ceremony. Explore how each couple incorporated aspects of simplicity, equalityT and respect into their own special day to make it their own. From seeking Clearness, to silent worship, to witnessed and signed Quaker wedding certificates – no story is exactly the same, but all reflect the idea that they “got it right.”

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Alumni Profiles 33

Once Upon a Quaker Wedding

Scenes from Ann Withington ’74 and Michael Wojtal’s wedding inside the Matinecock Meeting House. Photographed by Kathryn Abbe.

John Scardina An additional committee (often called “It’s the only Quaker sacrament that the Marriage Oversight Committee) we have,” said John; “the only practice helps with the logistics of the Meeting that mimics other rituals from other What is a for Worship for Marriage. They may offer faiths.” greeters at the door, sit with the couple in One person at the wedding will read Quaker wedding? the facing bench, provide an explanation the entire marriage certificate out loud, of the wedding “service” to the assembled after which the bride and groom sign ach year, incoming Friends families and friends, and help the couple it, then the Oversight Committee, and Academy Middle and Upper to complete the variety of tasks that need finally family and friends. “Even kids School students learn about to happen at a Quaker wedding. can sign it,” said John. the traditions of a Quaker “Once the Overseer explains the “There’s a sense of getting it right,” Ewedding ceremony. Quaker-in-Residence process to the audience, you go into silent added John. “Meetings feel very strongly John Scardina, who was married to his Meeting,” said John. “Just like a Meeting about supporting marriages under their wife Lucille Rivin in a Quaker ceremony, for Worship, anyone can speak. Once care.” shared details. they have, they sit down and there is no – Andrea Miller “As a member of a Monthly Meeting, applause. The ceremony, which usu- you would submit a letter to your Meet- ally lasts about 45 minutes, ends with a ing’s Ministry and Oversight Committee, handshake.” asking to be married under the care of Quakers believe in the Testimony of the Meeting. Meetings take this responsi- Equality, which is demonstrated in the bility very seriously,” said John. wedding ceremony. “The whole idea that Once the Meeting agrees to oversee the you marry yourself is another represen- marriage, a Clearness for Marriage Com- tation that each person has a direct line mittee (usually three to four people) meet with the Divine,” said John. “That is the with the couple. “They have a set of Que- most important thing.” ries that are used, i.e. ‘What will be your According to John, although there can faith practice as a couple?’ ‘Have you be, there is generally not a best man nor thought about your philosophy about bridesmaids, and music can be played finances?’ ‘Will you choose to have chil- and performed. dren?’ ‘If so, what will be your childrear- While Quakers still need a legal ing approach?’ ‘How do you deal with document from the county or registrar conflict?’ ‘Have you shared your dreams of marriage to get married without a for what you want to do in five years?’” minister, there is a Wedding Certificate Then the Clearness Committee returns (a beautiful document with calligraphy to the Monthly Meeting at a Meeting for John Scardina and Lucille Rivin and traditional language for Quaker Worship for Business and issues a ‘yay’ or weddings) which is available to all for ‘nay,’” explained John. signing. The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 34 Alumni Profiles

Once Upon a Quaker Wedding Beth Cocks Cobham ’60 ‘Just like the old-timers’ birthright Quaker, Beth Cocks Cobham ‘60 always knew she would have a Quaker wedding. A“Both my parents were birthright Quakers, who married in June 1938,” said Beth. “That was my family history and I wanted to follow the same path as my parents. My husband, Geoffrey, was fine with that because he didn’t have any strong religious affiliation.” Though Beth pressed her mother for a little bit of music – “Everyone will be looking at each other,” she protested – her mother persevered. “She said, ‘We will do it just like the old-timers did it.’” At 4 p.m. on Saturday, August 22, 1964, Beth and Geoffrey walked into the Matinecock Meeting House, past the pot- bellied stove and sat on the upper facing bench, above their wedding party. “We had 10 to 15 minutes of silence and then Geoff and I rose and spoke the Just married Beth Cocks Cobham ’60 and Geoffrey Cobham descend typical Quaker vows in the presence the steps from the Matinecock Meeting House in August of 1964. of God and our friends and then there was another 5 to 10 minutes of silence,” recalled Beth, who wore the same dress unaware of Quaker traditions – college this certificate printed on parchment that her mother and grandmother wore, friends or members of Geoff’s family paper. Then at the end of the ceremony, as well as her grandmother’s shoes. – Beth resisted giving out information the wedding certificate was signed by the The only other about the ceremony. Committee of Oversight (who were sit- testimony came from “We made them avail- ting sideways near the pot-bellied stove) Beth’s uncle, Frederick “There were four able, but didn’t hand and everyone else at the wedding signed Willits ’30, a Board people on our them out. We wanted it at the reception as witnesses.” trustee in the 50s, who (Oversight) Com- people to make their For Beth, time has only reinforced her delivered a speech about own choice.” decision to wed in a Quaker ceremony. the importance of the mittee and they In order to have a The two have since settled in Charlottes- Quaker wedding, Meet- came and talked to Quaker wedding, Beth ville, VA, where they have continued to ing and the significance us to ask us about and Geoff were required look for a Meeting similar to Matinecock. of marriage. our understanding to meet with a Quaker “My husband was very much touched “I can’t remember if of marriage.” Oversight Committee. by it and deeply moved by the way it was Geoff and I decided it “There were four people done,” shared Beth. “As the years went by, was time to be over, but on our Committee and my mother was right. Why take some- the ceremony ended they came and talked thing and not have it be true? I’m glad I with a handshake,” said Beth. to us to ask us about our understanding didn’t mess it up. I think she was right.” While most in attendance were of marriage,” said Beth. “We had to get – Andrea Miller

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Alumni Profiles 35

Once Upon a Quaker Wedding Alice Gardner in Shelburne at Capaum, with Mary said Phebe. Ingraham Davies ’61 as an elder, and their son, Nathaniel, as At the time, it seemed natural to the clerk. Meetings were couple to get married at held in their home until Matinecock. “We didn’t Nantucket 1711.” “We didn’t want to ask if we could have a As a student at do anything that Quaker ceremony, be- roots Friends, Alice was was counter to the cause neither or us are lice Gardner Ingraham unaware of her illustri- soul of the Meeting. Quaker and that would ’61 was married to John ous family history, but It’s such a simple have seemed hollow. So Anthony Kent Davies in the as she said, “I loved at- we talked to a minister, tending weekly Meeting place, so pure and who said he would love Matinecock Meeting House humble.” onA July 27, 1967. Her great grandmother, the six years I spent in to marry us at the Meet- Alice Gardner Shotwell, after whom the Upper School, and I ing House,” she said. she was named, was a member of the was fascinated to learn Phebe had long Matinecock Meeting. As Alice explains, from Craig White ’61, when attending admired the unadorned traditions of the “I was absolutely joyous during the Meeting during our recent 50th reunion, Meeting House. “It was the simplicity ceremony, especially since it was led by that the Meeting House was restored to of the Meeting House itself. We didn’t my grandmother.” its original design when it was rebuilt want to do anything that was counter to At that time, Alice’s beloved grand- after the fire.” the soul of the Meeting. It’s just such a mother, Mary Shotwell Ingraham, was a – Hayley Kucich simple place, so pure and so humble.” member of the Westbury Meeting. The Placing a single ribbon in the holiday vows that Alice and Tony spoke were Phebe Willits wreath that had been hung on the Meet- sent from Philadelphia because, as Alice Bergenheim ’67 Continued on Page 36 stated, “They seemed right on target to us. I especially liked the ‘as long as we both shall live’ ending.” Many friends “Just right and relatives spoke or read poems and the official marriage certificate read at for us” meeting was signed by everyone pres- or her wedding, Phebe Wil- ent that day. After the ceremony the lits Bergenheim ‘67 wanted celebration continued at Alice’s family’s to return home to her summer house on Asharoken Beach “other church home” – the in Northport with a wonderful casual FMatinecock Meeting House. luncheon. The newlyweds then rode off “My father was a member of in a Boston Whaler. Matinecock Meeting. From the time Alice’s family history is quite fascinat- I was a kid, we would go to Meeting ing. She explains, “My Quaker roots in with my father and grandparents. America go back to the 17th century as We would also attend church with I am directly descended from nine of the my mother, who was a Christian original ten English couples who settled Scientist. But Matinecock was my on Nantucket with their families in other church home. I can remember the 1660s. Two of their offspring, Mary going there many, many times before Coffin and Nathaniel Starbuck, were the I went to Friends,” recalled Phebe. Phebe Willits Bergenheim ’67 first English couple to be married on When Phebe and her fiance, Rich- and Richard Bergenheim Nantucket, in 1662. Mary Coffin Star- ard, who were both Christian Sci- buck is credited with introducing Quak- entists, planned to get married, they erism to the island.” As stated in The were encouraged by their church to Nantucket Historical Association: “In talk to other ministers and pastors. 1709 the first Quaker Meeting was held “We didn’t have a wedding ceremony in their Starbuck house, called “‘Parlia- in our church, but we were encour- ment House,’ in the original settlement aged to have a religious ceremony,”

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 36 Alumni Profiles

Once Upon a Quaker Wedding

Continued from Page 35 ing House door in honor of Christmas, Phebe added a single basket of flowers to the potbelly stove that accented her fuchsia-colored bridesmaids’ dresses and hired a cellist and flutist to play soft and simple music. “We married the afternoon of Decem- ber 18, 1982 – a week before Christ- mas,” said Phebe, who also engaged Betsy Billhardt ’68 as their photographer. “I know I have pictures with Richard and me, and with the minister, but I don’t remember a lot of rushing around. There was no sense of intrusion. That was her style.” Phebe and Richard invited guests to her parents’ home up the street on Duck Pond Road for the reception, but kept it fairly small. “We had a tea at my parents’ house that was beautiful, but modest. I think that both my husband and I wanted it to be celebratory, but not a big party – a Newly betrothed Rene and Herb Lape sample each other’s slices of cake. more sacred occasion. That was what felt right to us and what we wanted.” Looking back, Phebe remembers how Herb and Rene Lape with a smile about her Quaker wedding they balanced elegance and simplicity to to her husband Herb, a History teacher create a day that became a celebration of at Friends. family and being together. A personal Both convinced Quakers, Rene “We really thought through why we and Herb met at Quaker Meeting in do things, what’s the reason to have this, celebration Ashville, NC and after a couple years of is this what we really want? Is it right dating, decided to marry in a Quaker y dad was an athe- for us,” said Phebe. “We loved the fact wedding. “Our wedding was in the ist and he said it that it was celebrating the union of two Unitarian church, because there was no was the best wed- people who had a very strong commit- Meeting House and the Y wasn’t really ding he went ment to each other and commitment appropriate,” said Herb, who married to,”“M said Friends Academy to family and marriage. I felt like our Rene on May 8, 1982. faculty member wedding was just right for us.” The couple went through the Clear- Rene Lape – Andrea Miller ness process, which Herb described as a series of queries, designed to help the pair affirm their commitment to each other. “The Clearness Committee is responsible for nurturing you,” said Herb. “They asked us questions such as, ‘Are you free of past entanglements?’ ‘Are you clear to marry one another?’ and, ‘Is the The Lapes’ wedding certificate, Meeting free to take this which now hangs in the front foyer of their home. marriage under your care?’

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Alumni Profiles 37

Once Upon a Quaker Wedding If they feel clear that this marriage feels Justine Fasciano ’88 Joe and I ended the ceremony with a right, it theoretically gives them some handshake then a kiss – the perfect in- responsibility. How much in practice gredients for a happy marriage – friend- depends on the Meeting,” added Herb. Friendship ship and love.” Sometimes described as a Meeting – Hayley Kucich for Worship with marriage as the focus, and love Rene and Herb, once seated opposite e had such Heather Upton ’94 their guests in the facing bench, settled a wonderful into Worship at the start of their cer- experience emony. Unprogrammed getting married “People don’t usually give messages at“W the Meeting House. It truly was the before the vows,” explained Herb. “Our highlight of our day. and lovely vows included the traditional language My husband and I met at Friends in from the Philadelphia Yearly Meeting’s was married in a Quaker 1988. He said even then that he knew Quaker Faith and Practice and from our marriage ceremony under I was the one for him. But, he was a wedding certificate. The basic idea is that the care of Cambridge freshman and I was a senior... so you can God does the joining and everyone else Friends Meeting in Cam- imagine how that went over! Of course, is a witness to what God has done, not “Ibridge, MA. I never forgot him. some human agency,” he added. That process included going through We met again many years later and Historically, Quakers faced persecu- a Clearness Committee to approve the knew instantly that we were meant to tion in England regarding Quaker wed- marriage, and having a member of the be. In 2004, with the help of Nan Tilton, ding traditions. “In England, the state Meeting design and watercolor our wed- we were married. did not recognize Quaker marriages ding certificate, which every attendee at I remember going on Thursdays to because no clerical authority had signed the wedding then signed. the Meeting House as a student, sitting off on it,” said Herb. The wedding itself is similar to an un- in the beautiful building in dead silence. “Eventually, the state in the U.S. and programmed meeting, which made for a Our wedding was nothing like that. England affirmed this exception – this really lovely ceremony where everyone Just moments after everyone sat down, a right of Quakers to have a ceremony stood as they felt moved to speak to and dear friend of ours who is Quaker, broke where there’s no one officiating. The about us as a couple.” the ice. After that, it was a thoughtful, state now recognizes Quaker marriage as – Hayley Kucich funny, loving, free-for-all. valid and the clerk of the meeting signs the state license,” he said. Once Herb and Rene exchanged vows, guests began to stand up to speak and share their thoughts about the couple. “A Quaker wedding offers friends and family the ability to speak either about marriage in general, share their own experiences (generally positive) or stories about us,” said Herb. “It’s just more personal,” added Rene. For Herb, the stories went in one ear and out the other. “I didn’t remember any of the messages,” he said. “I only had eyes for Rene.” – Andrea Miller

Justine Fasciano ’88 and her wedding party sit in the facing bench of the Matinecock Meeting House.

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Once Upon a Quaker Wedding Steve Lapham ’63 “I didn’t think everyone would understand the process of silence and standing to speak, so instead I asked people, to feel A father’s what you feel right now,” he explained. “We provided clipboards with paper story and pens to everyone and, after a few hile I am a moments of silent reflection, asked them Quaker, my wife to write or draw what they were feeling was not so I did in the moment of the wedding ceremony not personally and what they wanted to tell the couple.” participate“W in a Quaker wedding. But, Matt collected the notes and over the the wedding of my father, Thomas course of the next year, mailed back one Willits Lapham (Friends ’27, I believe), or two at a time to the couple. “I wanted might be of interest. to remind them what other people were His mother was a Willits and the thinking and feeling during the Sands-Willits house in Port Washington wedding,” he said. has his wedding certificate along with At his sister-in-law’s wedding, Matt that of Thomas Willits from the mid- again experimented and switched the 1800s. As you know, members of the attendees’ participation to musical quotes Meeting sign the certificate as witnesses and music, at the request of the bride. to the marriage. Seeing a Quaker wedding from the of- What people find most interesting is ficiant vantage gave Matt a new perspec- the bride and groom make their wed- tive. “Sometimes standing up and speak- ding vows to each other ‘in the presence ing can be intimidating, but being able to of God and these our friends.’ There is write down messages gave everyone a way no state or political authority perform- to participate and broadened the involve- Matt Brennan ’89 and his wife, Susi (Doebele) ing the wedding. The number of times Brennan embrace at their wedding in 2002. ment. It worked out the way it should I have been asked if this is legal are have. I wish I had thought of this idea found a local calligrapher and illustra- numerous!” sooner so we could have incorporated it tor for their certificate. Hers was a little – Hayley Kucich into our wedding.” more decorative and ours was more text.” – Andrea Miller Following his wedding, Matt was asked Matt Brennan ’89 to officiate at two wedding ceremonies in California and then participated in Participant a third. As officiant, he found a way to incorporate a Quaker approach, an approach he also used at his father’s and officiant Quaker memorial service. att Brennan ’89 has seen “At the beginning I thought, ‘I’m not Quaker weddings from really a minister, so who gave me the both benches. right to speak?’ Inspired by Quaker “We incorporated the wedding tradition, I sought a way that QuakerM wedding certificate into our wed- everyone would have the chance to ding and let people document that they ‘speak.’ The speech I gave was short and were there and participated,” said Matt, was an opportunity for me to say, ‘Hey, who married his wife, Susi (Doebele) let’s all participate in this.’” Brennan, on November 23, 2002. After thinking how would he offici- “I based our wedding certificate on my ate at his first wedding, Matt decided sister’s (Kristin (Brennan) Shapiro ‘92) , to deviate slightly away from the tradi- who had gotten married earlier in the tional wedding ceremony format, but not year and also had her guests sign their so much as to confuse the majority who The Brennans’ Quaker wedding certificate, wedding certificate,” he added. “My sister weren’t familiar with Quaker tradition. which now hangs in their home.

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Once Upon a Quaker Wedding Ann Withington ’74 Married at ‘home’ s a girl, Ann Withington grew up in and around the spaces surrounding Friends and the Matinecock Meeting House.A Ann’s father, former headmaster Ted Withington became a convinced Quaker, but Ann did not. “I didn’t keep it up [going to Meeting] after I left Friends.” But when planning her wedding, Ann immediately thought of the Meeting House. “I had not been a church-goer since I was very young, but Quakerism spoke to me more than any Ann Withington and Michael Wojtal face their other religion. It most closely aligned wedding guests with their parents. with my own beliefs. I was very attracted to the Meeting to memorize all I had written because House because of its simplicity, which he felt strongly that vows should not was in keeping with my style and that be read. So, I pared mine down to a few of my husband,” said Ann. “We wanted simple sentences.” to make the ceremony our own, so we Famed photographer and Quaker added some elements Kathryn Abbe took that were not strictly photographs of the Quaker,” she added. “We did it really wedding ceremony. “We At their ceremony, simply because that’s asked Fuffy because Ann incorporated what we wanted.” we didn’t want some- Outside of the Meeting House with one of readings and music. “I one there who didn’t Michael’s nieces and flower girl didn’t know what the understand Quakerism at the last minute, nerves took over. standard Quaker cer- and its culture of si- The other big regret was about our emony was, so we had several moments lence. She was a very dear family friend. cake. My husband’s aunt Ruth was a of silence and then my husband’s father She didn’t use a flash and pretty much professional cake decorator and she read a passage from the Bible – Paul’s exclusively photographed in black and designed and baked our cake. But when First Letter to the Corinthians – the one white. She had a sort of quiet camera. the caterers cleaned up they took the rest about love,” recalled Ann. “My dad said She stood in the back and above (looking of the cake... and all the leftovers!” a few words about Quakerism, my best down) before the ceremony started,” said Despite the ultra-diligent caterers, friend sang ‘Amazing Grace’, and my Ann. “She had a way about her.” Ann says she would not have changed husband’s best friend sang ‘The Wedding For Ann, there were only two regrets a thing about her wedding, especially Song’ by Peter, Paul and Mary.’” about her wedding. The first involved when she considers the costs of some Ann had shared her vows with mem- her wedding dress. “I wore the dress my weddings today. “We did it really simply ber of Matinecock Meeting and Justice sister wore at her wedding, but in order because that’s what we wanted,” she of the Peace Jim Gardiner, who officiated to make it have some individuality for emphasized. “I feel like our wedding was at the wedding. She has saved the vows me, I had a very good friend make a really individual. We did it our way.” along with their pre-wedding correspon- medieval-like hood that I was going to – Andrea Miller dence. put over my head as I walked into the “He asked me if I was going to be able ceremony. I forgot all about that because,

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1940 1946 Florence Milyko Skinner Henry Palau 4202 Avalon Drive East 38 Yarmouth Road New Canaan, CT 06840 Rowayton, CT 06853-1847 (203) 966-9475 (203) 855-0021 [email protected] [email protected]

Florence Milyko Skinner sent in the news that she has just passed an anniversary of sorts 1947 in that she recently completed thirty-eight If anyone from the Class of 1947 would like to years of teaching singing, which began while be the class representative, please contact us at she was still very actively performing – as a [email protected]. We would love to hear from singer – throughout the states and Europe. you! She maintains a studio in her home in New Canaan, Connecticut and singers come from as far away as California for their lessons. As 1948 a hobby she has always been a stitcher and Marian Schwartz Feniger that is with English crewel, micro-petit point, 16 West 77th St., Apt. 9E and needlepoint. The proceeds of her finished New York, NY 10024 products, along with 100 other women who (212) 362-8968 belong to a sewing group, are allocated to non– [email protected] profit organizations in the area. Last year she flew to Roanoke, VA to attend her seventieth No More Tiaras (A Memoir of Eight Decades) 1949 class reunion at Hollins University and while by Solange De La Bruyere Batsell Herter there spoke on a panel of six women, describing If anyone from the Class of 1949 would like to be the class representative, please contact us at how her years at Hollins had influenced her Solange De La Bruyere Batsell Herter has [email protected]. We would love to hear from career. She begs to hear some news, any news, written a fascinating autobiography, No More you! from her classmates. She questions: where – Tiaras (A Memoir of Eight Decades,) published in and how – are you? 2012. Ron Holland from Amazon.com writes, “If you don’t know Solange Batsell Herter, you must have read about her. If you haven’t read 1950 1942 about her, you must have heard of her. If you’ve Suzanne Didier DeVito Helen Craft Price never even heard of her, you are in luck. Because 59 West 12th Street, 16A 173 Ocean Pines Terrace you’re about to meet this Roman candle of a New York, NY 10011 Jupiter, FL 33477 woman, in the flesh.” Solange’s life reads like (212) 627-7103 [email protected] a page out of Who’s Who. Holland continues, [email protected] “From her abiding friendship with Jack 1945 and Jackie Kennedy, her mother’s surprising 1951 episodes with J. Edgar Hoover, becoming a Joy Mayes Brown George H. Gifford, Jr. seven-year-old queen of the Normandie on her 2110 West Center Road 12 Oak Ridge Road first crossing of the Atlantic, her boisterous run- P.O. Box 239 Stony Brook, NY 11790-2011 ins with nuns in French and American schools, Otis, MA 01253 (631) 751-7489 tangling with Barbara Walters on National TV, (413) 269-6398 winning hundreds of thousands with a throw [email protected] of the dice (and quitting while she was way, way 1952 ahead), opening her own art gallery, plunging Sheila Morrisey Potter Margaret Whitney Shiels into the wild-cat real estate of post-war Canada, 37 Coles Meadow Road 5427 FM 2515 singing at Carnegie Hall, playing piano at Apt. #301 Kaufman, TX 75142 Camp David, getting into the gutter with Northampton, MA 01060 (972) 962-8124 Bobby Kennedy… It’s all her story, she takes (413) 584-1578 [email protected] you through triumph and trial and she’s as [email protected] honest about it as the day is long.” Solange, who We were so very saddened to hear of the passing splits her time between Paris and New York has of Bob Burian in May 2015. Barbara reported four children: Veroniqur de La Bruyere, Mary that he had several strokes. We remember him Deschamps, Jacqueline de La Bruyere Farman, as a kind and compassionate boy and man. Bookmark www.fa.org/alumni and and Marc de La Bruyere. browse memories your yearbook His unselfish act of taking care of Ken Shenkel  at the last and even raising money so that he could be properly buried was above and beyond what most people would do. We send

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our condolences to Bob’s wife, Barbara, his two daughters and their families and his brother Ward ‘54. It has been so much fun to speak to some of you in person. I talk to Donn Sullivan quite often and am pleased to report that he is well and still painting. Fay Biggins called me and I learned that she is training therapy dogs in GA. She sounds great and is in good health. Sandra Abramson Orhun reported that she had lost her husband a year and a half ago. It has been difficult for her but she is back to doing pastels and her paintings are being displayed in the window of a flower shop. She sounds chipper. Fluff Thayer wrote: “I still divide my time between Casey Key, FL and Bayville, NY. I do spend three weeks in Maine since two of my three live there. I am still missing Alec and always will, but keep myself busy by writing and painting. I wrote and edited a local newsletter for a number of years and also Emmett Down in My Heart, a play by Clare Coss ’53 at the Castillo Theatre in NYC spent a lot of energy with two garden clubs and the Garden Club of America, attending several activism for justice. Roanne Taylor, haunted out to be surprisingly fascinating. And exciting: environmental conferences in Washington by Emmett’s screams for mercy, comes face to they were in the Western Wall Tunnel, adjacent and serving as a delegate to annual meetings. face with her denial and failure to act as she to the Temple Mount in Jerusalem – the holiest I struggle at golf and love my Westie Terrier, begins her journey from denial to recognition site in Judaism – when a lot of shooting started and enjoy living by or close to the water. Our and involvement. At this defining moment in the street above them. After sealing off the old stamping ground, Locust Valley, is both in our nation, the play illuminates how each tunnel, their tour guide calmly stated that it changing and staying the same – but aren’t character negotiates the struggle for identity was time for lunch. Mike has been volunteering we all! Margaret Shiels and family are doing and humanity in our embattled world. The at the RBC Heritage golf tournament in Hilton well. We are looking forward to attending audience witnesses their own individual paths Head for years, and was on television in April the wedding of my cousin Craig White’s (’61 ) to challenge limits and open possibilities.” in connection with the winning birdie on the daughter Kimberly ‘05. We are blessed to have 17th hole in the sudden-death playoff – the all three children living in Texas. I continue to very hole for which Mike was responsible. As be active in The Woman’s Club of Fort Worth 1954 reported a year ago, they have downsized to a where I am serving a two-year stint as editor If anyone from the Class of 1954 would like to smaller home in Hilton Head. But like most of the newssheet. I am giving a book review of be the class representative, please contact us at downsizers, they have too many boxes left King Peggy to several groups in Fort Worth. [email protected]. We would love to hear from over. Some are filled with family silver. They I enjoy the two book groups there and my art you! would welcome suggestions for what to do with class. In Kaufman, I am still involved with the heirloom silver in which the next generation Friends of the Kaufman County Library Book 1955 has no interest ([email protected]). They summer and Author Luncheon. We just started a book on Drakes Island on the southern coast of club at the library. I would love to hear what Arthur M. Geoffrion Maine, where they typically have many family everyone is reading and what they have enjoyed. 322-24th St. visitors. Tom Jackson is bouncing back well I loved The Boys in the Boat. Come see us and Santa Monica, CA 90402 from his stroke late last year, which affected by all means, stay in touch. (310) 394-0185 his right side and cost him four months in [email protected] the hospital. His legendary upbeat attitude and sense of humor never flagged, and his 1953 Naomi Johnson Dempsey/Denslow If anyone from the Class of 1953 would like 69 Webster Point Rd. to be the class representative, please contact Madison, CT 06443 us at [email protected]. We would love to hear (203) 245-7617 from you! Emmett Down in My Heart, a play by [email protected] Clare Coss, began its run at the Castillo Theatre located at 543 West 42nd Street, New York City. Stephie Giardino Dobrinin writes that she and As the playwright explains on her webpage, Maurice are well, still splitting their seasons clarecoss.com, “In the play Emmett Down in My between Garden City and Palm Beach Gardens Heart, violence, fear and courage are interwoven (near West Palm Beach), but traveling less. She with white silence and responsibility. is also playing less golf since breaking both Mamie Till-Mobley’s monumental choice to wrists (not at the same time). Connie and Mike have an open casket for her son begins her Hellman are doing well. One of their latest trips Naomi Johnson Denslow ’55 fulfills one item transformation from private grief to public was to Israel with a church group, which turned from her bucket list.

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We will be moving 6 miles down the road to Wake Robin, a life-care facility. Our former pediatrician and friends from the University of Vermont began more than 30 years ago to think about the kind of place they would want when they retired and were ready to give up their homes. The result was Wake Robin. We had to pass a memory test in order to be admitted. Fortunately we discovered that there is some residual neuro-firepower. While it is a difficult transition, we suspect that there is never a good time for this kind of move. Come visit us in Shelburne, Vermont, just down the road from the Shelburne Museum.” News from Peter Bergh, “All is well here in the Rockies (we are high above the drought). Having lived in Edwards (near Vail) for 18 years now, I cannot think of a part of the country/world where I would rather live. Three hundred sunny days a year, great skiing, hiking and biking, exciting culture, wonderful neighbors and plenty of elbow room. At left is an image of me on the beach in Santa Barbara this past January. Barbara’s son and his family live there and we visit them several times a year. My policy of avoiding stress, staying far away from doctors, getting plenty of regular exercise, eating a healthy diet and endeavoring to think positively seems to be working, as at 77, I am fit and trim and in fine health overall. Still very active as an owner/director of a business in Vermont, The Sports and Fitness Edge, www. edgevt.com, having helped to build it into a thriving business today with some 400 employees and over 12,000 members. I am Peter Bergh ’56 at Arroyo Burro beach, Santa Barbara, CA proudest of our Kids and Fitness program that offers childcare and pre-school for over 400 progress has been good: his speech is mostly CT. Her husband Lee is taking a Digital Art children a day in facilities co-located with our back now, and he is close to walking with class there. Al Munro writes that his daughter five fitness clubs in Chittenden County where nothing more than a cane. Needless to say, is graduating from Skidmore and is headed to date we have taught over 15,000 children we’re rooting for him to complete his recovery toward work in marketing/graphic design, a love of learning and movement. My son in record time. Naomi Johnson Denslow has and that a granddaughter is graduating from Graham lives in Hood River, Oregon, and runs accomplished one of her bucket list items by UVM nursing school. Attending all of the a business he founded many years ago, www. attending the 2015 Super Bowl in Arizona Skidmore Equestrian Team’s competitions and resourcerevival.com; and my daughter Allison, with her son-in-law. Her daughter Barbara many of his son’s crew races for Franklin and who lives in Wilson, Wyoming, still works part gave up her ticket so Mom, an avid Patriots Marshall College has made for a high-mileage time as a wilderness guide for NOLS and runs fan, could watch her team beat the Seahawks year driving to and from his home base in New a successful consulting business with another in the final seconds. Most of the excitement Hampshire. woman, www.leadershipatplay.com. Barbara, actually happened right in front of them. my consort, lives in Aspen and we have been Since Barbara and Michael live in Scottsdale, 1956 engaged for ten years with no plans to get Naomi was able to visit the grandchildren at married. We live 90 miles/90 minutes apart Anne Wauchope Smith the same time. Joanna Miller Jacobus reports and though we very much enjoy spending time 297 London Drive that her newest activity is taking a sculpture and traveling together (Patagonia, New Zealand) Beaconsfield course at the Lyme Art Academy in Old Lyme, we have found that at our age and stage in life Quebec H9W 5Z1 the advice of The Prophet to let some wind Canada blow between us makes a great deal of sense. (514) 695-1951 During September and October I can usually Love Friends? Then “Like” Friends at [email protected] facebook.com/friendsacademyNY! be found at my family’s lovely summer place on  Peter Galbraith writes, “We were getting ready Buzzards Bay in South Dartmouth, MA where to hire a real estate agent to sell our house, and I enjoy windsurfing, sailing, fishing, crabbing, at the last minute Debby sold it to a friend. birding, beach walking, biking, doing chores

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and messing around in boats. Maria Espinosa in northern NY at our “StanleyCamp.” Other visited me two years ago (please come again), 1959 trips include Myrtle Beach, Belgium, and my and I would be most happy to host any of my Charles G. Jameson annual missionary trip to France with France classmates from Friends Academy should you 13464 Brightview Way Pour Christ (FPC). This year the FPC team wish to get a first-hand glimpse as to just why Gainesville, VA 20155 of Americans, French Canadians, Europeans Colorado is one of the fastest-growing states (703) 743-1619 from France and elsewhere in Europe, and some in the country.” Wendy Odenweller spent the [email protected] from Africa as well, will be spreading the good spring on a 17-day cruise on Regent Seven news of the Gospel in the northeastern French Seas from Miami to San Francisco. More about towns of Lille, Valenciennes, Douai and Lens. Wendy in the next issue! Bill Jones writes, 1960 Later in the fall, Mel and I are planning a trip “We are very happy in Frisco, TX, a very great Bob Powell with friends to Germany, Austria, Holland and and a fast-growing town in the country. We 5344 Reasor Court France. That’s all the current news for now. are just north of Dallas. We have been here Virginia Beach, VA 23464 May God bless you all! Your reporter, Paula about two years and the climate and the (757) 201-5525 Howe [[email protected]] will be people are great. We visited my son down [email protected] spending her 70th birthday in Berkeley and here about three years ago to dog-sit for him the San Francisco area visiting friends from her when he and his wife went to Alaska for four years attending graduate school at UC Berkeley weeks. While here we looked around, got a 1961 and working at Stanford University. In April real estate broker and looked at some homes, Park Benjamin, III I visited with two college friends in Kiawah played golf and decided the weather and neat P. O. Box 368 Island, SC. One of them lives there and we things to do were very attractive. We sold our Oyster Bay, NY 11771 toured all 6 golf courses/clubs on the island, Maryland home in October, 2012 and moved (516) 922-9537 including the well-known Ocean Course. We in with my son and daughter-in-law while [email protected] also visited Charleston and took a carriage ride we looked for a new home. We moved into around the city, visited some historic homes a 20-year-old+ community in Frisco. Lots and a plantation and went on the annual Home going on here, people are very welcoming, 1962 and Garden Tour. It is a lovely area. Meanwhile taxes are great, weather is great, lots to do. Randi Reeve Filoon in Houston we are running out of “cool fronts” On December 31, 2014 I retired from the P.O. Box 5495 and the brutal heat of summer will soon be activist association (Association of BellTel Ketchum, ID 83340 upon us. Retirees Inc.) that I started and led since 1996. (208) 788-1734 I am very proud of our accomplishments [email protected] having filed four lawsuits, forcing changes in 1964 corporate governance and creating a lobbying 1963 Suzanne Notides Melzig organization, ProtectSeniors.org that is forcing 104 E. Hillcrest Ave. Barbara Shoen Brundige changes in the law to protect retirees’ pensions Richmond, VA 23226 35 Wood Lane and benefits. I continue as the Chairman (804) 358-7626 Lattingtown, NY 11560 of ProtectSeniors.org. In addition to community [email protected] (516) 922-3944 work, I am Chairman of the Capital [email protected] Committee. I try to play golf two or three times 1965 each week, all year – thanks to the nice weather. Paula E. Howe Robert D. Tilden Gail is very involved in a number of social and 4914 Eigel Street 3640 County Road 16 community committees. Life is good.” Houston, TX 77007-3326 Montour Falls, NY 14865 (713) 863-7541 (607) 535-2217 1957 [email protected] [email protected] Roger O. Sanders 324 Fishing Ln. Not many responded to the request for news Save the date for Fall Fair and Homecoming Deland, FL 32720 this time. But the news from Toni Naren Weekend and the Class of 1965’s 50th Reunion: (386) 736-0815 Gates [[email protected]] sums it up for all October 2-4, 2015. And to get you in the [email protected] of us: I think turning 70 is new for ALL of mood, visit www.fa.org/yearbooks. Recently I us!!!!!!!!!!! It is May as I write this and I know spent a day working with my son, modifying I turn 70 in June which is only one month a trailer frame that we salvaged from under a 1958 away! By the time you get this news we may derelict camper. I had been cutting out little John Hiatt all be 70! Diane Olding Stanley [dianest@ pieces and fetching tools for him, but now I 21 Brookview Drive optonline.net] writes: Mel & I are looking was holding a wind screen for a weld he was Glenmoore, PA 19343 forward to our 7th grandchild, Aaron John making. Twenty years ago I did the designing, (610) 942-8814 (AJ). He is due in July. We are also enjoying I did the welding. Today I am his helper. I [email protected] our other grandchildren, ages 6–12. Right now felt old and fumble-fingered, but also kinda’ in April, Mel and I are in southern California proud. I talked with Barbara Kemp, and we soaking up some lovely sun, after a very cold had some laughs. She told a funny story of winter in New Jersey. This summer we’ll be me that I didn’t remember. (Imagine!) Like

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visit her and stop by our place in Brightwaters on his way home. He was recently cleaning up at his office and came across aNY Times article from July 24, 1987. The article included a picture of Libby Keefer with George Shultz. She was handing Mr. Shultz notebooks before his testimony at the hearings into the Iran-Contra affair. Carol Edgerton Downey is enjoying the view from her home on Wrights Mountain in Bradford, VT where she and her husband Donn have retired. They are near their son, his wife and two granddaughters. Carol keeps in contact with Nancy Gad-Harf who has moved back to Michigan. Nancy writes: “We moved back to the Detroit suburbs in January, 2013. Our son, Josh, and his wife, Danielle, had moved back from Chicago shortly before Jonah was born...he will be 3 in July. They asked us to come home; so we did! David is dong fundraising at Henry Ford Health Systems. I am enjoying the most peaceful time in my life. I make handwoven beaded jewelry that I sell at shows and in several boutiques here. It is fun and a great outlet. I also volunteer for a few organizations. Mostly, I am really enjoying being a grandmother!” Tina Hokanson writes: “I retired The Class of 1965 will celebrate their 50th Reunion October 2-4, 2015. from the county at the end of November, and am still in the transition process – readjusting most of us she is retired, but she isn’t beyond with Jay Tucker and Brandt Rising every few time, attention, and activities for balance. I love picking up small projects that seem interesting. months. All is fine with them. Brandt, by way the words of a friend of mine – ‘I’m more aware She spent a week with Annamarie VanTuyl of a chain of siblings and friends, coaxed a note than ever of the craftsmanship that goes into Mazieka, and they apparently toured Florida from Peggy Attridge Young. She now lives on the constructing a day to remember. . . Being at like teenagers. Annamarie stays busy with lots outer banks of North Carolina after practicing work gave me a predictable path to satisfaction.’ of kids and even more grandkids. Marianne law in Indianapolis for 40+ years. She is staying I created a chart of healthy habits to give some Darbee Pecoraro was an IT and business strategy busy “giving back.” On a hunch, I Googled “Jeff predictable form to the days. One day I tried specialist in the banking industry. She has Davis folk musician” and was delighted with to do them all. It was really funny – I started beaten two separate cancers and most recently what I saw (and heard). It all started at FA… at about 8:00 in the morning (meditation, sun a badly broken ankle, and is busy loving every Remember his yearbook informal? Lots of salutation, journaling, kale smoothie, reading, breath of every day. It was a joy to hear her. good stuff started at FA. We are each the sum of exercise, etc.) and it took all day! – no time for Marianne also provided me the hint I needed our experiences, and together we experienced friends, projects, getting out in the world, or to find Laura Brugge McLyman in Philadelphia, many things during those formative years. much of anything else. So lately I have been where she was a paralegal for many years. Speaking for everyone else I hope you will having fun spending time with my friends; Robin Neuschel Reeves is ready to face the world attend the reunion! but all of the breakfasts, lunches, and dinners again after Ross’ death and is anxious to attend out have been a little too delicious. So …I’m the reunion. Eddie Boyd moved from Las Vegas rebalancing again, but enjoying it all. I finished to New Hampshire, and Bill Benjamin moved 1966 taking a class through the Sound Salmon from Massachusetts to California, both of Helen Lotowycz Rising Solutions organization, and am working on them for retirement. Dave Pratt is moving to 98 South Bay Avenue a project related to water quality – about the an old farmhouse in Vermont this summer Brightwaters, NY 11718 impact of lawns and garden chemicals on and will be near both of his kids. Lynn Barker (631) 666-0135 Puget Sound, Orcas, and other marine life. Caruso is happy to just stay home after 40 years [email protected] During the class I was inspired to learn more of teaching. Dave Laemmle lives in Maine and about environmental restoration projects in this worried he was running short of firewood. Clinton Bush stopped by for lunch this January. region and in other parts of the U.S., and about We talked of the glories of wood heat. I talk Brandt and I have a place in Islamorada and the interesting and surprising collaborations. Clint drove down from Key Biscayne where In Boston Harbor the shipping industry and he is living. Clint works as Medical Director an energy company worked with marine View more campus life photos on of Occupational Medical Center in Miami, biologists for the benefit of the whales. Ocean instagram.com/friendsacademy sings in his church choir and is on the board Frontiers highlights this and other stories that  of the City Theatre of Miami. Bill Young’s inspire and show that these new partnerships mother celebrates her 90th birthday at Peconic are creating positive change. Betsy Gordon Kirk Landing in Greenport, NY. Bill will be up to is doing well in North Carolina, where she and

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husband Carey are enjoying retirement. They make occasional visits to the D.C. area to visit their daughter Mimi and her family. Adorable granddaughter Lena is a book lover just like her grandma. If you are looking for the best canned tuna look no further than PapaGeorgeTuna. com. Holly Harris Lovejoy gave me a few cans and they were delicious. Holly and her husband, Steve, are commercial fishermen living on Lopez Island fishing off the coast of California. I spoke to Holly about our upcoming 50th in the fall of 2016. I told her we do not have an exact date but early October or late September have been the usual time frame. So please keep that time frame in mind for our last big reunion in 2016. 1967 Diana Dickson-Witmer 24 Brendle Lane Greenville, DE 19807 (302) 656-1190 [email protected] Fifth day Meeting ... muted in the morning, calm and grey in 1968

1968 was indeed a big surprise! We’re late to “the our learning flourish as we began to trust rather Lesley L. Graham traveling the world scene,” but we’re easing into than fear our teachers at Friends, who were 615 NW Murphy Blvd. it. We went to Alaska in 2013 for a one-week there shepherding us toward new beginnings. Joplin, MO 64801 small boat tour and one week on land. Truly a In much the same way we need to open a (417) 781-1858 land unto its own with incredible scenery. It dialogue with this new teacher, to find the [email protected] really is “The Last Frontier.” There is nothing confidence and the trust to listen, while he is quite like being surrounded by a pod of 50+ pointing us toward new uncertainties.” Jim As I said in the last issue, here we go again! As humpback whales for six hours and watching Evans shares: “I consider myself a fortunate always, I appreciate any news from the class to them play, jump and breach. We gave up taking man to have had my parents as part of my life report for The Meeting House. I never want the pictures!! We recommend it to anyone who has for many years. Both of them turned 90 in class of 1968 to be blank. I haven’t edited the not been. Last year we did a self-guided driving 2014. Longevity seems to run on both sides of news from your replies as this way the class can tour of western National Parks and this summer the family. This past year has been difficult see what you all were thinking. Those that are we’re off to the Blue Danube, Budapest and because of the need to have my father move into on Facebook with me, please send me what you Prague. Louise and I certainly agree with Ken a nursing home to care for him as he coped would like the class to see, as I won’t take the Burns that our National Parks are America’s with terminal cancer. It was hard on my liberty to show your post out of respect to you. Best Idea!! Absolutely spectacular and mother living in the empty house by herself Onto our 50th reunion in 2018! Willy Merriken inspiring! I continue to enjoy helping people and it was difficult on all three of us with daily shares: “The Merriken Clan is healthy and well. strategize on the best and most efficient uses of trips to visit Dad in the nursing home. Dad Last year (2014) was a year of surprises. Our their money and have no plans to retire. Steve passed away on February 1, 2015, just four days three kids threw us a surprise 40th wedding Tilden shares: “A milestone that is happening after his 91st birthday. His last week was very anniversary party last June and caught us right now to all of us from our class and I uncomfortable for him so I know that his totally off guard. They planned and executed reached back to my Friends experience for help letting go brought some relief and peace to him. the surprise very well!! It was a nice smallish in finding a way forward. Recently, every week He seemed to be holding on because he did not affair with family and close friends. Hard to or so, one of our classmates has been receiving want my mother to be alone. They were think 40 years has flown by but it has! We now their Social Security card. When my envelope married almost 68 years! He was an amazing have 8 grandchildren ranging from ages 1-9 came I did not find a ticket to the gates of Oz, as Dad! He was a man of high moral character and they are very fun!! Earlier in February we may have imagined when we were still and integrity. His example sets a standard for 2014, I received a surprise honor when I classmates. Instead, I noticed a hand landing how one should live his or her life. He was learned I had been selected by our town’s Joint gently on my shoulder, like the cautionary considerate of our feelings right until the end. I Service Clubs Council as the 2014 Citizen of hand of a study hall teacher reminding me to will truly miss him! After almost a year of the Year. This honor has a 62-year history and keep my thoughts on the page. How do we routines that supported my Dad through his recognizes cumulative volunteer service address this messenger bearing a certificate of illness, I was finally able to have a vacation to to the town and any other volunteer based passage to a milestone of mortality – a hand Florida this March. My traveling companion organizations in which an individual may be reputedly grim and firm – yet somehow gentle? was a good friend who is from Brazil, but enjoys involved. As I had nominated someone else, it It was helpful for me to remember how we saw dual citizenship – U.S. and Brazil. We had a

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good time in Ft. Lauderdale and Orlando. summer! Hope all is well in Joplin and with all Joplin remains tranquil and easy. I have to say However, two days of theme parks were enough 68ers. Love, John.” Clifford Dacso shares: “We while writing these issues for the class, I often for a lifetime for me! I am hoping to go to are anxiously awaiting the arrival of our third reflect on all my time at FA. I can’t believe it all Brazil in July and my friend and I will be going grand (any minute now). Including this, life is started 60 years ago in Kindergarten where I on an Alaskan cruise in September. The cruise very good. While all are retiring around us, we met Kathy, Sally and Susan and we traveled will be a birthday celebration for each of us! I continue to enjoy our professional lives. I am all 13 years, then in 1st grade came Willy and cannot believe that I will turn 65 in June. The doing some research for the International Space Johnny and the rest progressed. Great memories big relief will be having Medicare and dumping Station and having good success in the lab. I was of the class and then the 5 years as a teacher my individual (not so affordable) insurance just awarded an endowed professorship in after college… okay, now onto finishing this. I obtained through the government marketplace.” translational science, so why quit? Sheri is did travel to So. Cal for the big 65th birthday to Laurel Brandt shares: I’ve got some news, directing her firm’s health law practice. We celebrate with my buddies. I love hearing though I blush as I write this. At the spend a fair amount of time at our home on regularly from Kathy Attridge Anas and Greg Massachusetts Prosecutors Conference in Spruce Head Island in Maine where the contrast Tarone. It is fun to see what’s new periodically Boston on March 26, 2015, I was awarded the with Texas could not be greater. The two grands on Facebook with Peggy Springsted Weiner, 2015 William C. O’Malley Prosecutor of the in Galveston are close by when we are here and Nancy Goldberg Kassop, Bob Piro, Betsy Harris Year Award. Quoting from the e-mail I received we see them (and their parents) every weekend. Radecki, David Porter, Bob Rushmore, Paul advising me of the award and inviting me to the Now, we will spend most of our lives on Hand, Anne Maher Franchot and Susan Abrams conference: “The O’Malley award is a lifetime I–45. Karin Neilson shares: “Hi, all. I can’t Butler. So next time send me your news and of achievement award, which recognizes the remember the last bits of information I sent, so course, I have to mention my great friendship special combination of talents embodied in a you can ignore anything in this update that with Kal and Judy Wynot; it is such fun truly outstanding prosecutor: extraordinary sounds too familiar. The past 12 months have staying in touch. I wanted to share these links courtroom advocacy skills; a gift for mentoring been…weird, with lots of disruptions. My work to help out my talented nephew Clayton, new prosecutors; compassion for victims; has required such a high level of discipline and (Todd’s ’67 son). He posted this on his Facebook and dedication to the highest standards of routine that any disruption tends to create page and his designs are really cool especially professionalism in investigations and in all chaos. But it was a good year overall. And now for kids. He definitely inherited his dealings with defense counsel, the judiciary and I’m easing into my retirement. I’m not the type Grandfather’s talent, thank you Dad. No the public at large.” The District Attorney for to quit cold turkey but I’ve begun to cut back. pressure, just wanted to share: ClayGrahamArt whom I currently work nominated me, and Don’t misunderstand me; traveling around – www.claygrahamart.com. Your place for all the eleven elected District Attorneys in the world for free has been an outstanding things Clay Graham, illustrator and graphic Massachusetts selected me. I am truly honored experience but I’m really enjoying living a artist! For all his designs, you can let them … but I feel very, very old. I’ve been at this a more normal life. I’ve got a work event each know to use teepublic for shirts, tank tops and long time. I worked for one District Attorney month till Christmas, including a return to hoodies (better prices) using this link (https:// from 1991 through 2010, when I retired along Africa; we’ll see what happens after that. As www.teepublic.com/user/ClayGrahamArt) And with him and much of our senior staff. In some of you may know, one of my retirement RedBubble for phone cases, duvet covers, 2012, the “new” District Attorney contacted me projects (I started it a bit early) was to retrace pillows, coffee mugs, travel cups, tote bags and and asked me to come back to work on a special the route of the Vikings from Norway to North prints (http://www.redbubble.com/people/ project: unsolved homicides. I’ve been working America (flying, not sailing in a longboat). claygrahamart). Now onto a great rest of 2015 part-time since then for the “new” District After a couple of visits to Norway and some to you all, keep the news coming for next time Attorney, a “newer” District Attorney and now vacations in Scotland, I took the next step and and be sure to send me your e-mail address for the “newest” District Attorney, handling went to Iceland. What a great place, and future correspondence. unsolved homicides, training, and other special although I love winter weather, I suspect most projects. I am proud that, in the last two years, people would find a summer vacation more the detectives and forensic analysts with whom enjoyable. Next step…Greenland and 1969 I work (and whom I nag) solved four cold Newfoundland. It may not be this year but Jane Forelle Casey murder cases!! John Malcolm shares: “I have definitely soon. What a fun project this has 49 Bay Drive enjoyed being home on the farm this winter been. Also, I took up Snowshoeing as a new Annapolis, MD 21403 and especially this spring and being outside sport. I’m much less than graceful and [email protected] every day. I do miss the excitement and proficient right now but it’s fun to be outside, (203) 570-1866 challenges of the Legislature but not the stress. and these new snowshoes are much more Lots to catch up on the farm. Had a nice trip to stylish than their predecessors. I’m still active 1970 Newfoundland in the fall and a week in Florida as VP in the Pittsburgh Branch of the AAUW in December. Rumor has it that ZZ Top and but also about to be inducted into the D.A.R., so Deborah Gianelli Buddy Guy are coming to southern VT this that should open up even more opportunities 587 Highland Avenue for volunteer work. It’s interesting and exciting Montclair, NJ 07043 to live in a place that was integral in the (973) 655-1011 settlement of this country. I’ve been reading so [email protected] Log on to LinkedIn to network with many of my stockpiled volumes about the hundreds in the FA Alumni Group pioneer days of this region; fascinating stuff. I Save the date for Fall Fair and Homecoming  think that’s it for now; I’ll try to be a better Weekend and the Class of 1970’s 45th Reunion: correspondent in future newsletters.” As for October 2-4, 2015. And to get you in the mood, me, nothing new since the last issue as life in visit www.fa.org/yearbooks.

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three-week voyage to Madagascar aboard a Kerins III writes that he and Joan are “carrying 1971 National Geographic expedition ship. We made on in our new locale, working hard, but not David Cressey stops in South Africa and Mozambique along riding my bicycle enough…more of the same.” 239 Johnson Road the way – places that are facing the challenges Philippe Bennett dropped a quick note, “Going Holbrook, PA 15341 of what I imagine it must have been like in to climb Mount Rainier in mid-May, and will [email protected] America during the Era of Reconstruction. send a detailed report back! Hopefully it will Places which made me think of Bill Finlayson be as much fun as the hike my dad, Kerry, Will Angela Manno ‘72 – our Civil War class historian and the work and Andy Romano had in the 60s! Still have 42 Commerce St., Apt. 3F of Susan Schulman ‘72 – who I think covers pictures of our expedition!!! Best to everyone.” New York, NY 10014 “places living on the edge” like this. Last stop – Many of you had the opportunity to attend [email protected] Madagascar – a land where time seems to have Roger Erickson’s memorial. On behalf of those stood still. A place unique in its biodiversity who could not attend, thank you for posting After a long while without class reps, team and beauty – which has been greatly threatened your thoughts on our Facebook page as well Cressey and Manno are taking up the after 90% of the country was deforested. I as sharing your remembrances via e-mail. On mantle. For the next Meeting House, please name explored with many wonderful fellow that note, Jim Neville wrote: “The Memorial something in the past 40 years that you’ve passengers – two of whom are leading the way Meeting for Roger Erickson was so touching. done that you’d like others to know about and in conservation and restoration – Dr. Patricia We had a great turnout from our class, and send to: David Cressey – ddcressey23@ Wright, an expert on lemurs and Madagascar I read some thoughts from Matt Stevenson, gmail.com and Angela Manno – amanno@ and Dr. Carl Safina, who has written many who couldn’t make it from Switzerland. Even angelamanno.com. We aim for nothing less books on the ocean and man’s relationship though I hadn’t been in the Meeting House than reviving the Spirit of ’71! Thanks to Craig to the natural world. Both are all heart – and since May or June of 1972, I felt like I had gone Kronman and Robin Dell Campbell for their it was a privilege to get to know them. Carl home. Gene Hamilton and Jim Bebry added many years of serving as class reps. Have a great attended Syosset High School – perhaps some some wonderful comments. It was fantastic summer! of you in our class played sports against him. to see John Mankiewicz, Jane and Larry, Susan I’m planning my next trip to Madagascar to Shulman, Bill Finlayson, Patricia Brink, and work with Pat’s research facility – the Centre Masha. Clark, Roger Erickson’s brother, told us 1972 ValBio. I’m bringing my youngest daughter some good stories, as did a lot of those present. Karen Spero Albers along this time – a rising senior in high school. And to get to chat once again with Bob Cressey, 2513 Harris Avenue The young shall inherit the earth – time to get Dexter Lewis, Harry Shaw, and Robbie Thomas Richland, WA 99354-1637 them started.” Francie Bush-Brown Thompson was a gift! I visited with David Cressey and said (509) 375-5356 reports that life is good! “Bob and I traveled to “hello” to Billy Vitriol, too. It was sad, but really [email protected] Zurich, then London.” Francie enjoys spending positive at the same time. Roger Erickson was time in NYC with her children Sarah and Gus, such a special teacher and person. I’m so glad Almost 43 years out of Friends Academy and where they meet for lunch, go on leisurely we all were touched by him. Friends Academy– our class is still very much connected, thanks walks through Tribeca and Soho, and spend what a special community!” Jane Dillof Mincer to computers and social media replacing smoke some quality time together. Jonathan Rapp also shared: “Larry and I were at the memorial signals and tin cans. Here’s the latest: Susan writes, “I lead such a staid but comfortable life for Roger Erickson Johnson Banta writes: “Many of you attended that no news is good news. I haven’t written along with quite a my sister Jill’s funeral service at St. John’s a book (only a few chapters years ago), or few members of the of Lattingtown on December 10th and the invented a new cancer treatment or otherwise class of ’72: Masha reception that followed at Seawanhaka. It was saved the world. But I do have a few good Sampsidis, Jim a full house – filled with friends from far and stories to tell at our next reunion! Regards to Bebry, Jim Neville, wide who loved Jill. The FA friend who traveled all.” (Note: Jonathan isn’t kidding, as some of Susan Schulman, the furthest distance award goes to Barbara you will attest. John Mankiewicz, do you need John Mankiewicz, Boyle Weiner ‘73 – who drove up through a some ideas for a new Netflix series? ‘House Bill Finlayson, snow storm from West Virginia. There was a of Cards’ meets ‘King of the Hill!’) Kevin Gene Hamilton huge turnout from the classes of ‘72 and ‘73 – Glynn checked in from Los Angeles: “I am (and “honorary” too many to name here. Thank you everyone still schmoozing my book having exhibited classmate Kate for your outpouring of love and support and at the LA Festival of Books last Sunday at Hamilton) and Jeff coming to honor Jill, and also deep gratitude USC (at last, I can say I am an “exhibitionist!). Leach. Gathering to those who have written me lovely notes. I I am now gathering materials for a second to honor Roger’s miss Jill greatly – as I know many of you do volume of “Tyrannosaurus Sex” based on an memory as we sat as well. She would have turned 60 on August examination of the 1980s. Padded shoulders in the Meeting 18th. I would like to do something for her on anyone? Tom is graduating high school and is The Brockhurst File by House together with her birthday – I will keep you posted. Last off to the University of California, Riverside Jane Dillof Mincer ’72 members of his month an old friend, Nicholas, offered me the while Kathleen is tearing it up here with me and Lynne Kramer family, and Dexter chance to get away and heal. Some of you may at LA High. They do grow up!” (Rumor has Lewis, Robbie remember Nicky – who I babysat for in high it that Steven Spielberg was interested in the Thomas, Harry Shaw, Lilian Gilden, and the school. With the loving support of my husband rights to Kevin’s book for a potential spinoff flood of faculty and students from the many and kids, I bid farewell and headed off on a of Jurassic Park, until he realized the book years that he taught – it was overwhelming. wasn’t about his favorite dinosaur.) Maurice A There was barely a moment of silence because

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it seemed that everyone wanted to express dear classmates gone too early.” In a recent Seamon, and Tony Marvullo. Tom Manos spoke their thanks to him and to share what it was post, Bill Dudjoc wrote, “In August of 2006 I for a bit then turned the floor open to anyone about Mr. Erickson that changed their lives. got news that changed my life. My cousin Janet who wanted to say anything about Kenny. It When we met at the 40th reunion, I was able was diagnosed with Stage IV Non-Hodgkins was a time for reflection, love, healing. I got to to thank Roger for all he had done for me Lymphoma. At the time I was not even really spend a little time talking to his wife Brenda as a teacher. I told him about a book I was sure what that meant. Then I heard the word: and their son Nick who looks just like Kenny. writing and promised to send him a copy, CANCER. The word was not a stranger to Cindy and I saved for three years and celebrated but I had no idea he was ill. I didn’t get it to me. At eight years old my third grade teacher our 33rd anniversary in Key West. We wanted him in time. I sent him my farewell – and my Mrs. Lapham died from lung cancer (never to do this on our 30th but had to wait a few regret – in the book’s acknowledgment. It’s also touched a cigarette). In 1983 I lost my Uncle years for finances to catch up. We survived one because I often imagined Roger reading over Fritz to brain cancer and in 1986 my Dad of the worst winters I can remember. I guess my shoulder as I edited that it took so long passed away from liver cancer. So why was this climate change has become a way of life. Will to finally say “finished!” I kept finding errors different? Well... Janet was about my age. She be heading to Lake Tahoe in about a month and even once it came out in print, there they was the closest thing I had to a sister. We used for our annual ride against blood cancers. Two were – a few typos and at least one particularly to sneak cigarettes and drinks at family parties. weeks before that a group of us will be doing unfortunate grammatical error! But, it’s out We were best friends. All I could think of was the Angel Ride, a two-day, 135 mile ride to there on Amazon at last. I wrote the book along my best friend was going to die. Because you benefit Paul Newman’s Hole in the Wall Gang with my co-author, Lynne Kramer. The novel, see, growing up in my lifetime cancer meant Camp.” I retired last spring and have enjoyed The Brockhurst File, is based loosely on our death. I had a total feeling of helplessness... not being bound to a schedule. We’ve done a experiences as divorce attorneys and features an there was nothing I could do. A week or so lot of traveling, visiting friends and heading intricate custody matter we enjoyed conjuring later Janet told me that she would be walking to Boston and Baltimore to spend time with up in our first “family law thriller.” We got a across the Brooklyn Bridge for Light the our children and grandson. There have been great Kirkus review, and the book can be found Night / The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. a number of Wicker weddings, it’s nice to get in print or on Kindle. We hope to make this I found out that I was no longer helpless. I together with my brothers and their families. the first in a series!” As for me, I am anxiously learned cancer was treatable. I could help. I Hope all is well with everyone! Any thoughts waiting for my husband John to retire early could raise money to help find a cure!! Janet on making it to the Fair to celebrate everyone 2016 so that we can travel with Ajax around went into remission in 2007 and has remained turning 60?? – Laura the country in our soon-to-purchase trailer. cancer-free since then. The money you have Ajax is our chocolate lab puppy, who views me donated over the years has funded research, as a litter mate and chew toy! He is the only treatment methods, and patient services. In the 1974 puppy in obedience training that has an IEP ’60s a child diagnosed with Leukemia had a Evette Beckett–Tuggle (independent education plan). While you are less-than-10% chance of survival. Today that 1338 Shinnecock Lane enjoying life, remember to stay happy, healthy rate is over 90%...Thanks to you. Since 2006 Fort Mill, SC 29707 and in touch! Warmest regards, Karen Spero you have helped me raise $46,893 towards home: (803) 431-7898 Albers the fight. Each year I think I can’t raise any cell: (516) 840-5236 more and each year you prove me wrong. [email protected] SO... prove me wrong again. I need $3,107 to 1973 hit a lifetime goal of $50,000.” To help Bill Laura Wicker Hackett in his fight against cancer follow this link: 1975 2420 Chatham Court http://pages.teamintraining.org/nj/ambbr15/ Tilde Mariani Giacché State College, PA 16803 BillyDudjoc. And more from Bill…Bill Dudjoc Salita Falconara, 11 (814) 238-7661 writes: “2015... the year we all turn/turned 60. 19032 San Terenzo di Lerici [email protected] I hear myself saying it, but not really getting La Spezia it. Plans for my 60th year? Six century rides, Italy Susan Nappa is still living in CT and working one for each decade and 60 miles with friends (339) 260-1874 hard on her growing business, PK Collection on August 22nd (My birthday). Sounds a little [email protected] – Fashion Accessories. She writes, “I have been boring to most but can’t think of anything traveling extensively doing private events better :–). Winter did not start off well with the Plans are underway for a fabulous 40th reunion and shows for charities. Cyndy Beach and Lulu passing of Jill Johnson on December 27th and in the fall. So mark your calendars for October Viscardi and I celebrated our birthdays together then the loss of Ken Manos on January 7th. 3rd and get ready to celebrate this milestone in January with our husbands – we are all While I knew Jill for many years, we were not with your friends from Friends! In anticipation within two weeks of each other. It was like really close friends. Kenny on the other hand, of a great turnout, we are reserving a block of old times and we had such a great time. I echo I knew since I was 7. He was someone I grew rooms for Friday, October 2nd and Saturday, Bill’s sentiment as we mourn the loss of some up with, could not wait to see after summer October 3rd at the East Norwich Inn under vacation, got into a lot of trouble with... In the reservation: Friends Academy 1975 Class other words, a true friend. The sad part is we Reunion. Check our facebook page “Locust Don’t just follow Friends Academy... had not seen each other in over 35 years. I guess Valley Friends Academy Class of 1975,” e-mails, @ | RT | # us at twitter.com/FAtoday sometimes life marches on. He will always be and snail mail for activity updates as well as  my friend and I will always miss him. I did yes no and maybes of your classmates who attend his memorial gathering on January plan to attend. If you’d like current contact 15th along with Jan Klocke O’Sullivan, Nick information for classmates to help urge them

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Class Notes 49

some pretty formidable and poignant events in the near future. We all wish both of your boys great good luck in the future, Greg! Keep us updated as to their future plans. Jeff Schiff is enjoying life in Raleigh, North Carolina with his daughter Sydney and his lovely wife Shelley. “Between teaching Sydney how to drive and starting a new business, I’ve been quite busy lately!” I’m sure that Sydney will do just fine in learning how to drive, as she will have an excellent teacher by her side! We got word from Mark Janoska that he has finally retired and bought a chain of tattoo parlors in Tennessee. We wish Mark bonne chance with these new endeavors, and congratulate him on turning his attention to his artistic callings. Mary Ellen Schloss and Ellen Westermann reconnected in New York City this last April. Mary Ellen and her husband, Tom Robotham, live in MA where The Varsity Football team huddles up during a game in 1975. she is the Conservation Administrator for the Town of Weymouth. Their son, Christopher, is a sophomore at Brown University and son James 1978 is a freshman at U. Mass., Amherst. It was great to hear from Carl Simpson, who is “currently Thomas Hawkins living in Grayson, GA. I am exceptionally 123 Duck Pond Road happily married to someone that I’ve known Glen Cove, NY 11542 since Kindergarten. My son, Carl T. Simpson, II, (516) 671-8977 also a FA grad, is a junior at FIT in Manhattan. [email protected] I’m very active in my church (Trustee, teacher of New Members Class, President of the Lis Dillof Dreizen ‘78 Hospitality Ministry). My current goal is 11 Cobb Ct. attempting to build a community center in one Huntington, NY 11743 of Atlanta’s poorest neighborhoods.” Please let (631) 424-3880 – home us know next time you are planning to visit [email protected] Carl II in Manhattan! And finally, we were delighted to get word from Kurt Winner that I’d venture to guess that my fellow classmates he and his wife were visiting New Orleans this from the class of ‘78 enjoyed a much-needed spring. Kurt wrote, “I am a food, wine and travel sunny spring, and that your summer frolickings The Tutoring Club poses for a picture in 1975. writer, currently on assignment down south, are well upon nigh. I’m hoping that you all enjoying a most inspirational career.” We would to come, contact Tilde Mariani Giacché at have a broad pastiche of vacation and barbecue love to hear more about your travels, Kurt, as it [email protected], Ellen Fasano at plans which will render some good postings for sounds like an amazing career, for sure! And [email protected], Allison West at allison_ our next issue of The Meeting House magazine. to all of our fellow ’78 Friends Academy alums, [email protected],Penelope Wylie Mayer at I have recently had the opportunity to be in I am certainly looking forward to our next FA [email protected] or Kathy Fox in the Alumni touch with some of our classmates and I am gathering as it would be the perfect opportunity office at [email protected]. truly appreciative that they took the time out to get together with folks that we haven’t seen from their busy schedules to send us these in forever! –Lis following updates on their lives. Leslie Garner 1976 writes, “My daughter is a junior in high school Nancy Toher Hawkins and we’ve started looking at colleges for her. 1979 123 Duck Pond Road Exhausting! She’s decided she wants to attend If anyone from the Class of 1979 would like to Glen Cove, NY 11542 an all-women’s college. Score! Nothing else be the class representative, please contact us at (516) 671-8977 new in my life... Trying to figure out who Leslie [email protected]. We would love to hear from [email protected] Garner is now that the time has come to focus you! on me again. I’m looking forward to meeting 1977 her again!” Well, Leslie, you’re in for a big treat. She’s a most exceptional woman, indeed! Chuck Cooperstein Greg Gavin sent this information along to us, 1332 Coral Drive “Nick graduates from Hamilton college in May, Coppell, TX 75019 and Will graduates from Friends Academy in (972) 393-2160 June…” It sounds like Greg will be attending [email protected]

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 50 Class Notes

Robert Blechman 42 South Knoll Road Mill Valley, CA 94941 (415) 810-8889 [email protected] 1982 Leslie Oren & Michael Poloukhine 930 Embury St. Pacific Palisades, CA 90272 [email protected] [email protected]

Greetings Class of 1982! Your class reps (Leslie and Michael) continue to enjoy life in LA. We recently bought a “fixer-upper” and will be using Michael’s architectural and building skills to renovate and expand. Michael’s kids, Chloe, Nick and Nina, continue to do well; The Class of 1980 will celebrate its 35th reunion this October 24. Chloe graduates from college this May, with a degree in nursing. Nick continues in college reunion with Jim Mitchell ‘81 in Orlando. They and Nina is off to college in the fall. Jim 1980 reminisced about our performance of “How to Hummerstone writes with news from a number Michael Salzhauer Succeed in Business.” Speaking of that show, the of classmates: “Jill Capobianco, Matt Bloom and Benjamin Partners great Peter Lash is living in Florida. Retaining I attended Roger Erickson’s memorial earlier 589 Broadway his star power, Peter appears to have all of his this year. While a sad occasion, it was nice to New York, NY 10012 hair and he isn’t fat. I will be monitoring Peter’s catch-up with fellow ’82ers. Jill sounds like (212) 744-7974 Facebook pictures for any mean reversion on she’s enjoying London, while Matt is taking [email protected] those fronts, and report them with glee! Greg a (not) hasty plunge into marriage in June. Conway, Evan Deoul, Carlos DelCristo, and I had Matt works in financial services in an anti- Save the date for Fall Fair and Homecoming a mini-reunion a few months ago. Well, we money laundering role, and is likely the class’s Weekend and the Class of 1980’s 35th Reunion: actually didn’t have that reunion, but we almost most prolific author. Ed Balazs, John Corcoran, October 2-4, 2015. And to get you in the mood, did. Certainly, the biggest and most interesting Evan Myrianthopolous and I (see attached) got visit www.fa.org/yearbooks. Wow! For the story of all is that Ellen Sywolski won a lump together for a few post-work beers in March first time in the almost 35 years since we left sum of $615,000 in the Maryland State in NYC. Like me, John and Ed are commuters Friends, I have plenty of material to write for Sweepstakes. She took her winnings, purchased from Connecticut, while Evan is keeping our class notes. No, it isn’t because you guys a rare BMW K1300 GT motorcycle, learned the Port Washington school district busy have suddenly become interactive; I’ve gone how to ride the thing and just completed a solo with a gaggle of his offspring. Chris Dalton, to Facebook. There, I can find great stuff to ride along the entire length of Central and another Metro North regular, had a previous report to all of you, and I get to pick! I think South America – from Baja in Mexico all the commitment with his two soccer-playing sons, as a policy I will refrain from posting your way to Patagonia. Along the way, she shared but pledged to attend the next gathering. Chris’s silly selfies, if you promise to protect me from her winnings by identifying and making grants sons are both top-notch athletes (mom’s genes, mine. Most of this stuff is real (!): Jim Chaddick to excellent but needy agricultural research enjoyed Armenian Coffee on April 28th at facilities. Now, she’s back in Baltimore in time The Shish Kabob House in Las Vegas. Mike for blue crab season. With this new research Ainbinder seems to be on a paleo diet, looks technique, I’m confident that I will be able to like he’s still in great shape, and posts some provide you insight into the lives of classmates pix that I couldn’t because my daughter trolls forever. You are even invited to help me pick the my Facebook account. On September 4th, Bill tidbits of your life that you’d like classmates to Dalton enjoyed dinner at Buccan Restaurant in share, by being in touch! Palm Beach. Said Bill, “As we are still in our 50s, my friends and I enjoy being some of the 1981 only folks in the restaurant after 7:30!” Sue Betsy Jordan Gahagan Lomenzo had a run-in with Woody Allen and PO Box 12 his family in New York. It seems that the 142 Skunks Misery Road cunning Woody and his daughter/wife were Locust Valley, NY 11560 able to maneuver Sue into playing a role that (516) 759-6697 enabled them to ditch their paparazzi. My [email protected] threat to make up stories about classmates also Ed Balazs ‘82, John Corcoran ’82, Evan brought out Ellen Auwarter, who had a great Myrianthopolous ’82 and Jim Hummerstone ’82

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Class Notes 51

1986 Kara Vassel Lewis 44 Pinehill Crl. East Tequesta, FL 33469 [email protected] Chuck Ritter 79 The Promenade Glen Head, NY 11545-1739 (516) 676-8271 [email protected] 1987 Barry D. Joseph 67-66 108th Street, D66 Forest Hills, NY 10010 (718) 222-3563 [email protected]

Emily Beiles Kaufman 7 Beechwood Drive Saddle River, NJ 07458 (201) 785-0907 [email protected] 1988 If anyone from the Class of 1988 would like to be the new class representative, please contact The Kindergarten Club of the Class of 1985 – at the start and right before graduation us at [email protected]. We would love to hear from you! Thao’s Library, a film inspired by clearly) and goalies in the Norwalk, CT school a photo taken by photojournalist Stephen district. Dave Geiger has been enjoying life in 1983 Katz, premiered May 6 and won the Audience South Florida for coming on 10 years. The next Award at the inaugural Bentonville Film stop on his long strange trip is to Chicago in Laura Dilimetin Festival, an event created by Academy Award July to take in the final three shows ever for the 66 Eakins Road winner Geena Davis to celebrate women and Grateful Dead. Harry Stecopolous is considering Manhasset, NY 11030 diversity in film. The film explores the unlikely putting aside his wheat scythe and horse-and- [email protected] friendship of two women, a Vietnamese ravaged buggying it up from Iowa too. Rich Stingi and I by Agent Orange exposure and an American will be taking in the much more contemporary 1984 suffering from depression. Stephen was also the band The Who at Forest Hills in May. Will be Beth Anne Melkmann documentary’s Director of Photography. For brown-bagging lunch for the next few years 162 East 80th Street, Apt. 3B more information about the film visit www. as I’m sending my second kid off to college New York, NY 10075 thaoslibrary.com. in the fall [we can relate, Jim!]. Margeaux is (212) 988-1753 entering her sophomore year at University of [email protected] Richmond, while my daughter Cammy will 1989 be a first year at UVA. My brother-in-law Peter Adam Fruitbine Gilden will likely join them at a fraternity 1985 375 Faletti Circle party or two from his nearby home in Norfolk, Laura Match Schaffer River Vale, NJ 07675 VA. Pete keeps busy by running a government 1220 Studio Lane (201) 391-3040 contracting business and chasing after his three Riverwoods, IL 60015 [email protected] great kids.” Thanks for a great update Jim! [email protected] We’ve heard other tidbits of news about our JoAn Monaco 315 East 72nd St., Apt. 18-L classmates through the grapevine, so please take Save the date for Fall Fair and Homecoming New York, NY 10021 a moment and send us a quick note about your Weekend and the Class of 1985’s 30th Reunion: (646) 438-9264 doings to share with the class to include next October 2-4, 2015. And to get you in the mood, [email protected] time! And until then, have a great summer! visit www.fa.org/yearbooks. Greetings class of 1989... no updates to report

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 52 Class Notes

but a quick anecdotal story.... tuning into the Please feel free to drop me an e-mail or give me hit show The Affair to see the Village Club 1993 a call if you make it down to San Juan. of Sands Point where my husband and I Natalia Porcelli Good married ten years ago as a setting for one of the 2 Tondan Lane 1997 glamorous Hampton-esque scenes, I learn that Lattingtown, NY 11560 Devon Broderick Carroll Steve Kunken plays a book editor for the main [email protected] character, Noah. Steve does a great job in this 28 Bedford St., Apt. 23 New York, NY 10014-4471 role and it’s definitely worth watching to catch Danielle Valenti Smith (917) 531-7579 him in four different episodes. Steve also did a 1036 Park Avenue [email protected] fantastic job in the Oscar-winning movie Still Apt. 12D Alice starring Julianne Moore where he plays New York, NY 10028 Devon A. George the role of Dr. Benjamin. And, these are only (646) 334-3888 163 West 18th Street, Apt. 9B a couple of Steve’s incredible performances in [email protected] 2014 alone! He was also in the The Wolf of New York, NY 10011 Wall Street and will be in the upcoming Bridge (516) 457-8082 of Spies and the television series slated for 2016 1994 [email protected] Billions. I think it’s pretty incredible to be Heather Upton able to turn on the television to see one of our 451 East Sacramento Street 1998 tremendously talented classmates... stay tuned Altadena, CA 91001 Justin J. Boults for much more from Steve Kunken in 2015 (617) 803-9199 222 Gates Ave., Apt. #2 and 2016. Hope to hear from you for our next [email protected] update in the fall! Sincerely, JoAn Brooklyn, NY 11238 1995 [email protected] 1990 Thomas A. Pascarella Justin P. Meli If anyone from the Class of 1990 would like 156 Lewis Avenue 1500 Chicago Ave., Apt. 620 to be the class representative, please contact Westbury, NY 11590 Evanston, IL 60201 us at [email protected]. We would love to hear [email protected] (713) 553-4108 from you! And don’t forget to save the date for [email protected] Fall Fair and Homecoming Weekend and the Kelly Reid Walsh Class of 1990’s 25th Reunion: October 2-4, 96 Grove Street Congratulations to Dion Short Metzger on 2015. To get you in the mood, visit www.fa.org/ Wellesley, MA 02482 the birth of her beautiful son Blake Robby yearbooks. If you are interested in spearheading (781) 237-2893 Metzger! Michelle Rabinowitz Carney can now the celebration, please contact Kathy Fox, [email protected] add “Emmy” to her credits. Michelle is the Alumni Affairs Coordinator, at 516-465-1796 supervising producer of the Emmy award- or [email protected]. Plans are underway for a great 20th Reunion, winning documentary filmWe Could Be King. so save the date for Fall Fair and Homecoming For more on the documentary visit https:// Weekend, October 2-4, 2015. And to get you tribecafilm.com/wecouldbeking. 1991 in the mood, visit www.fa.org/yearbooks. To Michael Fox start you thinking about your friends from Jennifer Ryan Woods 1209 N. Citrus Avenue Friends, here’s a bit about Dan Fisher. Dan lives 2 Meadow Spring Lane Hollywood, CA 90038 in McLean, VA with his wife Ashley and sons Glen Cove, NY 11540 (646) 373-7535 Cabot (7), Winston (5) and Burke (1). Dan is a (516) 398-0888 [email protected] partner at Akin Gump and co-head of the M&A [email protected] practice, and splits his time between D.C. and Colleen Doyle Moran New York. Dara Broxmeyer Gruenberg 10 Arbor Way 24 Hampton Road Morristown, NJ 07960 Scarsdale, NY 10583 (973) 656-1513 1996 (914) 723-1796 [email protected] Luke Cass [email protected] 350 Chardon Ave. Suite 1202 2000 1992 San Juan, PR 00918 Clayton Siegert [email protected] Paul P. Corrigan 100 I Street 1 The Preserve S. Boston, MA 02127 I recently was pleased to have lunch with an old Woodbury, NY 11797 (617) 821-2867 friend, Zach Smith, who was down in San Juan (516) 448-2228 [email protected] on business. Zach is doing great – he is a busy [email protected] bankruptcy litigator, still playing the piano, Love Friends? Then “Like” Friends at and funny as ever. We had lunch and caught facebook.com/friendsacademyNY up on old times and new. It was great to see him.  The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Class Notes 53

Jacqui Young ’01 and Noah Weissman ’01 wed in Brooklyn, NY.

Meredith A. MacKinnon fact class notes are a little light this round, I 46 Duck Pond Road thought I would encourage people to write in Glen Cove, NY 11542 about any charity/community service projects JOHN REGAN/friends academy (516) 759-2063 you are involved with. Friends Academy helped Kristin Morrison ’06 speaks to Upper School faculty [email protected] build our foundation and appreciation for and students during a winter sports assembly. giving back, and it would be great to highlight Save the date for Fall Fair and Homecoming fellow classmate’s causes. Michelle Javian was Kristin Morrison ’06 Weekend and the Class of 2000’s 15th Reunion: recognized by the New York Observer as one October 2-4, 2015. And to get you in the mood, of the “Top 20 Philanthropists under 40.” ‘Connect the Dots’ visit www.fa.org/yearbooks. Congrats to Michelle and all of her countless ou might not realize it, but hours dedicated to growing her non-profit everything you are doing on Harboring Hearts, which provides cardiac the field, on the court, in the 2001 patients and their families with housing, meals, “Y pool, on the putting green, or on the track is Hadley Devon Mongell transportation and emotional support. If there setting you up not only to be a better athlete, 245 E. 63rd Street are any former FA lacrosse players in New York but to be a better person – a better friend, a Apt. 924 City, I recently started coaching a weekend better employee,” shared Kristin Morrison New York, NY 10065 clinic with the non-profit organization, ’06, a Friends three-sport athlete, she went (516) 759–1377 CityLax. We are currently focused on on to play Divison I lacrosse at Princeton [email protected] introducing/expanding lacrosse into New York University, before ultimately landing a job as City schools and geographies that historically an analyst at Goldman Sachs. Hi Everyone. Hope this finds you well! Mark have had little or no access to the game and that In addressing Upper School students and your calendars as Fall Fair is going to be are predominantly comprised of populations faculty, Kristin shared how FA athletics October 3, 2015. Heather Rubinstein and I from lower income families. It’s a great way impacted her life; how sports taught her about will be in touch to plan another pre-Fall Fair to give back and be involved with the sport. If “failure, joy, disappointment, excitement, gathering on that Friday before. Buckrams anyone is interested in learning about volunteer winning and losing; about maturity, worked out great since we were able to be on opportunities, I’d be happy to tell you more. teamwork, humility and selflessness.” the back patio and catch a glimpse of the FA In closing, I wish you and your families a very Kristin asked students to connect the dots Bonfire Fireworks. It was such a great time and happy and healthy spring/summer. I’ll look in their lives, confiding that it might not be we hope to keep the tradition alive this year! In forward to seeing you at upcoming FA events! until later when the dots make sense. “You’ll other exciting news, Josh Hundert has been in Hadley All the best, come to realize that sports are teaching you Boston since leaving NYC after his graduation some of life’s greatest lessons. And you will from medical school in 2008; this past July he carry these teachings with you for the rest of finished his medical fellowship in nephrology 2002 your life, as will I. at the Harvard teaching hospitals and he is now Lauren Marie Bebry Friends greatly shaped who I am today and splitting his time between seeing patients at 8655 Edgewood Park Drive is a large contributor to my successes in life the Boston VA Medical Center and continuing Commerce, MI 48382 and I know that it will do the same for you.” his research on chronic kidney disease at the (631) 875-5725 Brigham and Women’s Hospital. Due to the [email protected]

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 54 Class Notes

Michael Jason Weiss Christine Farrell 40 Cow Neck Road 1971 Cedar Swamp Road 2010 Sands Point, NY 11050 Glen Head, NY 11545 Alexa Gordon (516) 883-1572 (516) 606-1300 24 West Creek Farms Rd. [email protected] [email protected] Sands Point, NY 11050 [email protected] 2003 Caitlin Koufakis 239 Cleft Road Save the date for Fall Fair and Homecoming Jessica Jakobson Mill Neck, NY 11765 Weekend and the Class of 2010’s 5th Reunion: 434 East 11th Street (516) 627-5222 October 2-4, 2015. So dust off your copy of New York, NY 10009 [email protected] The Lamp and get ready to celebrate with your [email protected] friends from Friends! Ryan Rosmarin moved Amani Sheikh works as the Business to Sun Valley, Idaho after graduating from 2004 Development Manager at a social enterprise Pitzer College in May of 2014. Since his move, called BidKind, an online charity fundraising Angela Teresa Batista he has become a part owner of a small startup, platform that raises funds for nonprofit PlayHard GiveBack. Founded by a group of 2 Greenway organizations through auctioning off unique Muttontown, NY 11771 individuals who believe in the importance of celebrity experiences. They have raised social responsibility, PHGB aims to create a (516) 857-6572 funds for some amazing nonprofits like The [email protected] culture among athletes around the importance Global Poverty Project, The Art of Elysium, of giving back. They empower passionate Jonathan Harley Koenig The American Cancer Society and others by athletes who have the potential to redefine the 31 Yukon Drive creating unique one-on-one experiences with world in which we life. PHGB has created an Woodbury, NY 11797 celebrities & artists such as James Franco, infectious movement that has the potential [email protected] Carrie Underwood, Hugh Jackman, Gwen to positively alter the athletic paradigm. Ryan Stefani and No Doubt and more. BidKind attributes his work in the social enterprise is always looking for new nonprofits and industry to his educational experiences at 2005 celebrities to partner with. If anyone is Friends Academy and Pitzer College. Helen Simpson Hatch interested in partnering with BidKind, contact Learn more about PlayHard GiveBack by (917) 634-7646 Amani at [email protected]. checking out their online platform at: [email protected] www.playhardgiveback.com. Garrett Dooley 2008 (516) 314-5241 Laura Berke [email protected] 2011 211 W. 56th St. 243 Cleft Rd. Apt. 9F Mill Neck, NY, 11765 New York, NY 10019 (516) 680-4437 Save the date for Fall Fair and Homecoming [email protected] Weekend and the Class of 2005’s 10th Reunion: October 2-4, 2015. So dust off your copy of Alexandria Phillips The Lamp and get ready to celebrate with your 801 N. Monroe St., Apt. 719 friends from Friends! Arlington VA 22201 (631) 421-3332 2006 [email protected] Brian T. Alessi 50 Shore Drive 2009 Plandome, NY 11030 Nell C. Kucich (516) 365-3983 316 Manhasset Woods Road [email protected] Manhasset, NY 11030 Amanda Lamothe-Cadet ’11 spends the weekend (516) 965-0635 at Yale with Kira Garry ‘11 and Jacquelyn 2007 [email protected] Nakamura ‘11. Rebecca Pacchiano Holly Constants John E. Mascari 93 Tenth Street 52 Ayers Road Dartmouth College Hicksville, NY 11801 Locust Valley, NY 11560 3153 Hinman (516) 932-0002 [email protected] [email protected] Hanover, NH 03755 [email protected]

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The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Class Notes 55

Candace Taylor ’14 readies for a meet with the University of Pennsylvania track team. Candace was named Ivy League Rookie of the week three times. Gabrielle McPhaul-Guerrier 188 Leaf Avenue 2013 Central Islip, NY 11722 Sydney Menzin [email protected] 6 Tappenwood Drive Lattingtown, NY 11560 Katie Sands graduated from the University of [email protected] Richmond with double honors in her major (516) 639-2083 in theater and minor in communications. Next she’s off to a two-year acting conservatory in John O’Brien NYC. 16 Wishing Well Lane Old Brookville, NY 11545 2012 [email protected] Gabrielle Rechler (516) 375-9860 58 Hoaglands Lane Old Brookville, NY 11545 2014 [email protected] Lydia Graham (516) 404-4105 2000 Front Street East Meadow, NY 11554 Jake Ingrassia 95 Feeks Lane Simi Akinola Lattingtown, NY 11560 215 Rushmore Street [email protected] Westbury, NY 11590 (516) 236-6064 William Sands was named lacrosse rookie Chris McCann of the year at Bucknell University and was 170 Linden Farms Road ranked by Inside Lax magazine as the 15th best Locust Valley, NY 11560 college freshman in the country. University of [email protected] Pennsylvania’s Candace Taylor had an amazing freshman year. Candace finished 2nd in the Candace Taylor ‘14 amazing rookie year 500 meters at the indoor Ivy Championships Sarah Chartash garnered her UPenn’s Most Valuable Track and 6th in the 400 meters in the outdoor Ivy 19 Serenite Lane award – the first time in UPenn history that League Championships. She made the Penn Top Muttontown, NY 11791 it was given to a freshman. [email protected] 10 All Time record books in the 200, 400, 500, (516) 941-7309 800, 4x800, SMR (where she set a new record), ECAC Rookie of the Week once. Nicknamed and DMR. Candace was named Ivy League “The Freshman Phenom,” this was a great Rookie of the week three times and was also rookie year for Candace!

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 56 In Memoriam

We Abbie Gail Freedman ’59: Honored as one of a ‘Thousand Points of Light’ bbie Gail Freedman ‘59 passed away on vidually one of President George H.W. Bush’s Remember... AJanuary 5th, 2015 after a long series of Thousand Points of Light. She later earned illnesses. She was born August 7, 1941 in New a J.D. from Empire College School of Law. Robert Burian ‘52 York City to Virginia Pennington Freedman Abbie loved animals and surrounded herself and William B. Freedman. with them. She loved her Abbie Freedman ‘59 In addition to her skills in art and music, dogs, cats, goats, and pot David Warden ‘60 Abbie was a fine athlete, playing on eleven bellied pig and she sup- varsity teams while at Friends. After graduat- ported numerous animal Louis A. Navarro ‘66 ing from Marietta College, Abbie taught rescue charities. She was Kenneth Manos ‘73 in elementary, middle, and high schools in an inspiration to many, Connecticut and New Hampshire for 10 showing great courage and Helen Gayer Shettel ‘75 years and received an M.F.A. in art history perseverance in the face of from Assumption College. She moved to many different adversities. Northern California and managed a women’s Abbie Abbie had many close health retreat for five years before having an Freedman ‘59 friends and leaves them automobile accident from which she became behind along with her a paraplegic. brother Don, sister-in-law Susan, and nephew Abbie received a master’s degree in counsel- Derek; all of them will miss her enormously. ing the disabled from the University of San Anyone wishing to honor her life can make Francisco and volunteered to work with the a donation to a charity to benefit the lives of disabled for many years. She was awarded indi- animals or to preserve the environment.

Helen Gayer from the 1975 Lamp

Kenneth Manos ‘73: Systems analyst with wordplay talent

enneth Manos ‘73 passed away on January K7, 2015 after an extended illness and a 6-year battle with the after-effects of a stroke. Ken was born on January 27, 1955 in Brook- lyn, NY. After Friends, Ken graduated from David Seeler, left and Colgate University. He was David Warden, right a Computer Systems Ana- as Santa Claus. lyst at State Street Bank, The Bank for Savings, and David Warden ‘60: Service to his country, community and family PNC Financial Services. He loved music, travel, first met David when we were freshmen Middle East. books, and movies. He will Iand he was our class president. David left After writing about David’s life history, I be remembered for his Friends for Phillips Academy in Andover. thought about what made him special. He was wonderful sense of humor When he transferred back to a man’s man, and at the same Kenneth Manos and inventive wordplay, Friends, he had to repeat a time, a very sensitive guy. I from the 1973 his jovial attitude, and his year, placing him in the class visited him in South Caroli- Lamp determination, repeat- of 1960. To all the members na. He was dressed as Santa edly, to outlive everyone’s expectations. He is of our class, he will always be Claus for a local charity. I survived by his mother Denise, wife Brenda, a member of the ’59 “Master could not resist sitting on son Nick, brother Tom and wife, his niece Class.” his knee and requesting my and three nephews, and many caring and sup- David was captain of Christmas wish. Then two portive friends. the tennis team and played days later, we were at a local football and basketball on the David Warden ‘60 in recent years and TV station, this time with varsity teams. He gradu- from the 1960 Lamp a dog on his lap, requesting ated from Randolph Macon donations to the Foothills College and was a decorated USMC Veteran. Humane Society. During his TV tenure, he had Obituaries Wounded in Vietnam, David received an hon- a 100% adoption success. orable discharge as a Captain in 1967. He had This all brings me back to Friends, with our Please send announcements and memories a very dangerous assignment of taking green theme of “service.” David did his part: service to Kathy Fox at [email protected] or call troops on their first patrols. David married his to his country, service to his community, and (516) 465-1765. Feel free to include a Navy nurse, Judy Helmstetter. He retired as a service to his family and friends. photo with your message. senior executive for the Mobil Oil Corpora- – David Seeler ‘59 tion after 30 years, 20 years of that time in the

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 In Memoriam 57

Robert Burian ’52: National Guardsman who Paul Newman. He also enjoyed singing, advocated and understood both in the choir at St. Timothy’s and consumer needs at IBM as a stalwart of the Coastal Chordsmen (Connecticut). Bob was an avid sailor and past obert Ward Burian, 80, of member of the Fairfield, CT, surrounded Shinnecock Yacht by family, died peacefully at Club (Quogue, home on May 5, 2015, from NY) and the complicationsR following a stroke. Bob, Pequot Yacht Club as he was known to his friends, was (Southport, CT). born on November 4, 1934, in New He shared his love York City. of sailing with He attended Mount St. Michaels, family and friends, Friends Academy in Locust Valley, the Robert Burian enjoying trips on University of Pennsylvania and the from the 1952 Long Island Sound, Wharton School. A member of Sigma Lamp Buzzards Bay, the Chi fraternity, he was also a member waters of Nova of the eight-man varsity Lightweight Scotia and the Caribbean. crew that topped a winning season When not sailing. Bob loved his time by competing at the Royal Henley at the Surf Club of Quogue and the Regatta. Quogue Field Club, and more recently After graduation, he proudly served at the Fairfield Beach Club. his country in the National Guard He is survived by his wife of 48 before embarking on a career in years, Barbara, two children – Pamela marketing, first with Arthur B. Little Elizabeth Badger and Susan Paige and Beechnut, and then with IBM. Woods Richards and their husbands, During his tenure at IBM, he gained a Thomas Badger and George Richards, reputation as an advocate of the need his brother, Ward Burian, two nieces to understand customer requirements. – Jennifer Burian Rowe and Allyson Known to his colleagues as ‘Mr. Voice Robert Burian ‘52 in more recent years Burian Sands, and five grandchildren, of the Customer,’ Bob was a pioneer Grace and Witt Badger, George, William in shaping the way companies bring (SCORE), and as an advisor to the Fanny and Kate Richards. products to market. Crosby Nursing Home and the Bridgeport A memorial service was held on Wednesday, Bob was active in the Episcopal Church, Rescue Mission. May 13, at 11:00 am at St. Timothy’s Episcopal serving on the vestry and as Senior Warden at As a talented amateur actor, Bob was a Church in Fairfield. The Redgate-Hennessy St. Timothy’s Church in Fairfield, and was a member of the Amateur Comedy Club (New Funeral Home, 4 Gorham Pl, Trumbull, CT, member of the New Canaan Society, a global, York City) and the Westport Community assisted the family with arrangements. connected network of men who are committed Theatre. His favorite role was that of Colonel In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to friendship with Jesus and with each other. Pickering in Pygmalion. to St. Timothy’s Episcopal Church, 4670 He devoted his retirement years to helping The highpoint of his acting career occurred Congress Street, Fairfield CT 06824 or the others: As a member of the Bridgeport Dean- when he was a member of the cast of Our Town, Bridgeport Rescue Mission, 1088 Fairfield Ave, ery, the Service Corps for Retired Executives a Westport Playhouse production that starred Bridgeport, CT 06605.

Louis Navarro ‘66: Tip Systems salesman; passionate about outdoors

ouis Navarro passed away on Monday, Louis is survived by his wife of 28 years, LMarch 9, 2015 at Glens Falls Hospital Jeanette Navarro; his three in Glens Falls, NY. The son of the late Luis children, Alex Navarro and his and Margaret (Stubbs) Navarro, Louis wife, Hannah, of Ithaca, Ashley received his bachelor’s degree in sociology Navarro and Dustin Navarro, from Hofstra University after graduating both of Virginia Beach, Virginia; from Friends. He married Jeanette Cazull and his aunt, Lillian “Betty” on April 4, 1986 in Brooklyn, NY. Stubbs of Jamaica, Queens. Louis was a salesman for various companies, the last being Tip Systems in Houston, Texas. He enjoyed skiing, going hiking, gardening, bowling and spending Louis Navarro ‘66 time with his family and friends.

Louis Navarro atop his waterskis

The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Making a Bequest to Friends Academy “We realized very quickly what a special place Friends Academy is to our children.” – Jennifer and Henry Williams, FA parents

ifteen years, ago Jennifer and Henry FWilliams joined the Friends Academy community when their eldest daughter, Mackenzie entered Play Group. “During Mackenzie’s elementary school years, we realized very quickly what a special place Friends Academy is and what it offers as a whole to our children,” said Jennifer. For the Williams, it was a natural and easy decision to support Friends Academy with a Planned Giving Bequest and continue the level of support they had afforded other institutions. “We planned this a long time ago,” said Jennifer and Henry Williams have been a part of the FA Jennifer. “We feel strongly that it was important community since 2000; their daughters, Mackenzie ‘15 and to not only give back on a yearly basis to FA seventh grader Madison, both started at Friends in Play Group. with the Annual Fund, but to consider a planned meaningful in our lives. giving for the future. While this type of financial We are so pleased to have found an academic estate planning can be involved, it helped us to environment that has benefited our children and put our minds at ease, knowing that contribu- enriched their lives in so many ways. We have a tions would be made to organizations that were unique community,” said Jennifer. Please join Jennifer and Henry Williams, who have included Friends in their estate plans: You can make a gift that has a substantial, long-lasting impact. You can leave a legacy and recognize the value Friends holds in your heart. You can make a difference in more students' lives with a bequest than with a gift that comes from today's income or savings. A bequest is a simple way to make the maximum positive impact without compromising your lifestyle or budget.

For information on how to include Friends Academy in your estate plans, how to establish an endowment, or to discuss ways to match your interests with school needs, contact Director of Development Jim Michalek at [email protected] or 516-393-4269.

Strong Minds. Kind Hearts. The Meeting House | Winter/Spring 2015 Friends Academy Alumni Association Alumni are the living legacy of Friends Academy.

A Look Back at the The New York City Reunion

On Monday, June 1, 2015, over 200 alumni gathered at the Princeton/Columbia Club of NY to honor retiring faculty members: Sharon Nelson, Mary Ann Reardon, Lillian Shulman and Judy James. For more photos, head to www.fa.org/alumni.

Left, Jared Jones-Crosby ’00, Natalie Harrington ’05, Upper School Spanish teacher Edgar Posada, Middle/Upper School art teacher John Regan and Reid Pauly; right, Lydia Graham ’14 and Shekinah Pettway ’14 with librarian Laurie Fleming.

Alumni Upcoming Events>> 2015 Fall Fair & Homecoming Special reunions for the Classes ending in “0” and “5” Saturday, October 3 10 AM – 4 PM Look for class reunion details on the alumni pages of the Friends Academy website: www.fa.org/alumni  Non–Profit Friends Academy U.S. Postage 270 Duck Pond Road, Locust Valley, NY 11560 PAID 516.676.0393 | www.fa.org Hicksville, NY Founded 1876 Permit No. 438

Find us ... Save and join us online Our website The Date! www.fa.org Visit our official school site June 13 to see regular slideshows Commencement, 10 AM of school and updates on campus life. September 8 First Day of School Facebook www.facebook.com/ FriendsAcademyNY September 26 Become a member of our (First) Family Friends Academy Facebook Community Service page and see behind–the– Sandwich Making, 10 AM scene videos, alumni updates (Commons) and campus life photos. October 3 Instagram Fall Fair & Homecoming, www.instagram.com/ 10 AM to 4 PM; friendsacademy Alumni Reception, 4 PM Follow on–campus life in fun (Jackson House) and stunning visuals. Linked In October 8 www.linkedin.com Honors Concert, 7 PM Register and join the Friends (Theater) Academy Alumni group to network with fellow alums. Friends Academy, Portledge and German students deliver a powerful and united performance as they search to answer the question, “What is the price of freedom?” in a joint Global Studies Scholars program this spring, page 17.