Bulletin 2 – 24 January 2019

Welcome to the second bulletin of the Monkey League 2019/20 Season.

The results in this bulletin don’t take into account any of the midweek results, which will be picked up next week, along with this weekend’s Football League action.

Winners and Losers

It won’t come as surprise to many that Liverpool leapfrog Leicester to take the lead in the Monkey League . Jurgen Klopp’s men have won all five of their fixtures since the last bulletin, whilst the Foxes’s tough festive fixtures saw them lose three games since last time. Unlike the Premier League, the Monkey Premier League title race is far from over, as only 2 points separate Liverpool in 1st place and Sheffield United in 3rd, who have closed the gap on the top two. At the other end of the table, only one win in five for Tottenham means they sit in last spot, just behind North London rivals Arsenal. Elsewhere in the table, Bournemouth have only managed to pick up one point and fall from 8th to 16th, whilst Southampton’s recent turn of fortunes sees them climb from 15th up to 8th.

Well I tempted fait last time, and Leeds look have started their annual process of generously giving up their automatic promotion place, with only one since Christmas. This poor run has seen Leeds fall from 2nd to 8th in the Monkey League Championship, which is as close as ever before. Millwall jump into first place just ahead of West Brom, who have also had their own struggles over the festive period. The top of the table may be very tight, but unfortunately for Stoke, they are very far adrift at the bottom of the table. The Potters are joined in the bottom three by Huddersfield and Luton.

Wycombe Wanderers continue to lead they way despite only picking up one win in their last five. Coventry City and Rotherham United have started to close the gap, with the Millers moving up to 3rd place from 10th following a perfect run since Christmas. Elsewhere, Blackpool have plummeted from 3rd to 13th after picking up only one point in five, and there is no surprise that Bolton and Southend contrinue to prop up the table. There is a small glimmer of hope for The Shrimpers as they managed to beat Accrington Stanley for only their second win of the season.

Exeter’s fine run of form sees them narrowly knock Swindon off top spot. Closely behind the top two are Crewe Alexandra and Cheltenham, with only six points separating the top four clubs. Four defeats on the trot means Cambridge United fall into the bottom half of the table, whilst Mansfield and Stevenege haven’t managed to find a way to climb out of the bottom two places.

The Monkey League Results

Paul Landreth just about pips Craig Moran to 1st place this week (however much Craig wants to dispute this…). Graeme Denny still sits in last spot, just behind Andrew Grant who has endured a very difficult winter spell, falling from 125th place.

The most improved player this time is Nick Saxton, climbing 54 places to 35th on the leaderboard. Derek Allen is this week’s biggest faller, slipping from the dizzy heights of 18th all the way down to 83rd.

Quote of the week

“If you are a young Herbert, someone in our town, and you think throwing rubbish on the floor is acceptable you’ve got another thing coming. No it aint. Pick up your rubbish, put it in the bin”. Grimsby Town’s new boss Ian Holloway has not only taken on the turning around the Mariners season, but has also taken it upon himself to clean up the town, ordering a “young Herbert” to pick up his litter on the seaside high-street last week.

News in Brief

It’s the fourth round of the FA cup this weekend, and Tranmere Rovers set up a huge game against Manchester United after causing an upset against Watford last night.

With Marcus Rashford sidelined, there are rumours that Manchester United are looking to resign 35- year-old Carlos Tevez. Would United fans really be prepared to forgive him following that famous “welcome to Manchester” jibe when he moved across to Manchester City?

Question of the Week

Here are the answers to last week’s bumper round of trivia:

1. As of 20 December, how many Premier League managers have lost their job so far this season? Can you name them? And how many managers in the Football League have also lost their job? Javi Gracia, Mauricio Pochetino, , Quique Flores, . 28 managers in total 2. In 1993-94, who became the first and as of last season, the only side to concede 100 or more goals in the Premier League? Swindon Town 3. No Scottish club has won the UEFA Cup/Europa League, but which three Scottish teams have lost in the final? Celtic, Rangers and Dundee United 4. Which two Spanish clubs did Diego Maradona play for? Barcelona and Sevilla 5. The 2022 World Cup will be held in Qatar, but can you name the only other country to host the tournament without previously competing in it? Uruguay

As we have now tipped into a new decade, are you able to name the players who:

1. Kept the most Premier League clean sheets in the 2010’s 2. Scored the most Premier League goals in the 2010’s 3. Played for the most Premier League clubs in the decade? (Spurs, Swansea, Cardiff, QPR, Southampton, Liverpool) – hint: a defender

James Allen

Results

Position Name Monkeys beaten Points 1 Paul Landreth***** 994 235.5 2 Craig Moran***** 994 231.4 3 Neil Kempshall 987 212.1 4 Neringa Simonaityte 979 204.9 5 Claire Saunders 979 204.5 6 Steve Higginbottom**** 974 201.2 7 Jane Carrington 963 195.1 8 Matthew Slater** 963 195.0 9 Jon Wilkes 958 192.8 10 Andrew Hall***** 956 191.7 11 Paul Moloney**** 952 188.0 12 Jenny Mahtani** 951 187.6 13 Michael Stock 951 186.2 14 Stephen Moorse**** 944 185.1

Position Name Monkeys beaten Points 15 Henry Tapper*** 934 181.7 16 Becky Thompson***** 932 179.7 17 Tim Jones***** 914 175.4 18 Aaron Love***** 914 174.7 19 John Small***** 904 171.8 20 Colin Freeman***** 900 171.4 21 Sam Mullock* 896 170.5 22 Dale Walmsley***** 894 169.7 23 Mark Riches 888 167.6 24 Jack Presswell* 884 166.6 25 James Gardner* 873 163.8 26 George Kennedy* 873 163.5 27 Ranbir Khinda 863 160.5 28 Caroline Parker*** 852 156.0 29 John Hope**** 851 155.6 30 Chris Marson**** 850 155.4 31 Nick Saxton* 835 151.9 32 Marcus Johansson***** 820 149.7 33 Richard Buck* 783 142.3 34 Mark Williams 781 141.9 35 Neil Kennedy**** 781 141.7 36 Tim Poil***** 778 141.5 37 Marcos Abreu 776 140.7 38 Jonathan Hugh*** 776 140.5 39 James Smith***** 764 138.4 40 Alyson Hampton* 763 137.8 41 Thomas Harrington 763 137.8 42 Richard Lunt*** 760 137.5 43 Brendan O'Connor***** 756 136.9 44 Emma Robinson**** 755 136.5 45 Matthew Allen* 741 134.4 46 Mel Wilson***** 740 134.3 47 Andy Yates**** 734 133.4 48 Rob Heeley 731 133.3 49 George Kirrin***** 731 133.3 50 Adul Fiddler* 727 132.2 51 Chris Williams**** 727 132.1 52 Ian Shepherd 724 131.4 53 Dean Hornsby* 724 131.4

Position Name Monkeys beaten Points 54 Paul Devine***** 724 131.2 55 Peter Norman***** 720 130.6 56 Daniel Shipp 701 128.2 57 Eddie Hopkins***** 701 128.1 58 Martin Blades**** 700 128.0 59 Mark Warnes***** 700 128.0 60 Gary Symons** 699 127.8 61 James Allen**** 698 127.8 62 James Saxton** 681 125.7 63 Adam Robertson*** 676 125.0 64 Will Greaves 669 124.1 65 Andy Britton** 665 123.2 66 Mark Hampton* 661 122.9 67 Chas Goddard***** 659 122.6 68 Josh Allison 653 121.8 69 Dan Phillips 650 121.1 70 Dan Jinks**** 647 120.9 71 Duncan Carter***** 645 120.7 72 David Bramham** 638 120.0 73 Jane Boorman***** 635 119.1 74 Max Mauchline***** 633 118.9 75 Stan Hutchinson***** 632 118.7 76 Marina Sanders 618 117.0 77 Lance Havell***** 615 116.1 78 Lesley Denny***** 602 114.2 79 Graham Bates 596 112.9 80 Daniel Sirl* 596 112.9 81 Ben Law 590 111.9 82 Hilary Salt**** 586 111.4 83 Derek Allen* 581 110.4 84 Charlotte White 571 109.8 85 Scott Harrison***** 570 109.4 86 Lisa Orange 564 109.0 87 Caroline Gower* 558 108.7 88 Paul Mason 558 108.4 89 Gregor Stronach 549 106.9 90 Craig Walker**** 547 106.3 91 Andy Illingworth 547 106.1 92 George Bilsby*** 541 104.8

Position Name Monkeys beaten Points 93 Roger Arnold***** 520 101.7 94 Joe Pearce 520 101.7 95 Isaac Hunt 515 100.3 96 John Stock 501 99.0 97 Rohit Siqueira** 498 98.6 98 Sandra Young 481 95.7 99 Mitesh Dayalji 457 93.1 100 Tim Barlow**** 450 91.9 101 Paul Marriott***** 447 91.0 102 Katie Sutton* 442 90.5 103 Victoria Richards 430 88.8 104 Tony Barnard**** 421 86.9 105 Shona Stronach 411 86.1 106 Micah Derbyshire* 410 85.8 107 Amrita Dasgupta** 405 84.4 108 Andy Taylor* 403 84.3 109 Rachel Coe** 392 83.3 110 Nicole Dobson**** 386 82.0 111 Wendy Ludman**** 386 81.8 112 Sean Delaney***** 376 80.8 113 Dylan O'Reilly**** 376 80.8 114 Kester Young***** 344 76.9 115 Kapil Sheth* 340 76.4 116 Keith Taylor 339 76.0 117 Daniel Morris 338 75.9 118 Helen Butters*** 337 75.5 119 Alvyn Mzwimbi 310 72.7 120 Jen Hodgson 309 72.6 121 John Ingoe 291 70.6 122 Megan Sullivan* 275 67.1 123 Lea Salter 273 66.5 124 Lauren Coulthard* 270 66.0 125 Darren Goodall***** 267 65.3 126 Declan Keohane***** 255 62.8 127 Andrew Pritchard***** 237 59.5 128 Robin Holderness***** 232 59.3 129 Jennifer Jackson 218 56.9 130 Amy Friel* 207 54.9 131 Simon Holderness*** 180 49.7

Position Name Monkeys beaten Points 132 Toni Johnson***** 163 46.7 133 Sharon Royston* 161 46.0 134 Graham Hutchings 150 43.1 135 Graham Edmonds***** 141 41.3 136 Manjula Satheesan** 97 28.0 137 Stephen Kilgannon**** 86 24.7 138 Oliver Nicholls* 83 24.1 139 Rob Young** 83 24.1 140 Steve Houghton* 77 22.9 141 Chris Chivers***** 69 19.4 142 Michelle Smith 67 18.8 143 Steven Pickles** 59 14.3 144 Matthew Ward 53 9.5 145 Abbie Greenwood 42 3.8 146 Nicola Moore*** 38 1.1 147 Phil Leary** 36 0.2 148 Andrew Grant* 36 0.1 149 Graeme Denny**** 7 -28.2