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Res Gestae Law School History and Publications

1976 October 1, 1976 University of Michigan Law School

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Recommended Citation University of Michigan Law School, "October 1, 1976" (1976). Res Gestae. Paper 541. http://repository.law.umich.edu/res_gestae/541

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'' A c. C. ORb t N 6 T 0 W I 6- M 0 R E_,

AND IT IS D-EMONSTRABLY .SO,

C..OURTS IN GENERAL HA.V£

REDUL.E D THE TERM

TO A USELESS AND MEANINGLESS

. II S H I 8 8 0 LET H ...

[fRE.STON v. COMMONWEALTH, 4ob S.W.~d 3'18]

QC.T. II 1'176 ELECTION~ -~ ...... ,._. __ ,_ ---· - - · ~ · ---~. ~ ... •. · ·RESULTS Section 1a *Charles R. Lowery, Jr 25 Fred Ariel Rodriguez 18 David R. Kern 14 Wednesday Laurie Dickerman 1 David Brenner 1 FILM COMMITTEE MEETING Sect1on 2a , *Geoffrey Silverman 37 For Anyone Interested Paul Stephen Jensen 20 Wednesday, Oct. 6 Daffy Duck 1 )t15 PM Hertha Sibbach 1 Boom 120 Hutchins Hall Or call Rick Durden 995-4484 Section 3• *Gary Peters 29 Mark Sterling 13 Pat Paulsen 1 Everyone is invited to bring their lunches on Wednesday, October. 6, and hear Professor Section 4• Whitmore Gray speak on his recent visit to *John Joseph Kralik 28 China. The luncheon, sponsored by the Susan Swantek 15 International Law Society, will be held at J.uan Marquez 13 the Lawyers Club in the faculty dining room beginning at noon. Board of Governorss *Martha Haines -- 42 Jim Simon, 995-3748 Argie Ant 5 Steve Brock 1 Marvin Mandel 1 Jim Schnare 1 Bob Kohorst 1 Thursday Charles Lowery 1 Abby O'Dess 1 FEMINIST LEGAL SERVICES ~ - Designates winner Meeting R.G. -- THE BEST TO YOU EACH MORNING 'l'hursday, Sept. JO 4a15 PM Women's Lounge Cap'n Crunch ...... Ned Othman Frantzenberry ...... Ken Frantz ----.------i Kix ...... Carol Sulkt>s ·day (763-4332) Fr1 Count Chocula ...... Don Parman Wheaties ..... ~ ...... John Mezzenotte Trix ...... Crusader Rabbit S P E A K E R Sugar Smacks ...... Sandy Gross Dr. Andy Watson, Prof. of Cheerios ...... Stuart Olson Law & Psychiatry Corn Flakes ...... Earl Cantwell "Coping with the.Pressures Team Flakes ...... Michael Marrero of Law School" Lucky Charms ...... Bob Brandenburg Friday, Oct. 1, 1976 Cocoa Krispies ...... Dot Blair 2a30 PM 100 Hutchins Hall Life ...... Dan Schulman Puffa Puffa Rice .... Kevin McCabe J 100% Natural ...... Ricky Lempert ----JUAN LUIS TIENDA The La Raza Law Students Association urges your financial support in esta ~. RAZA MEMORIAL SCHOLARSHIP blishing the Memorial Fund and insur­ ing its continued success. In order On August 19, 1976, Juan Luis to establish the Memorial Fund a mini­ Tienda, third year student at the mum of $2,000 is needed. The La Raza University of Michigan School of Law Students will be holding a special Law, died in a t ragic automobile collection on Friday, October 8, from accident in . He was 24 10 A.M. to 2 P.Mo at the main floor years old. desk in Hutchins Hall. In the near future the movie, Chulas Fronteras The La Raza Law Students Associa­ (Beautiful Borders)will be shown on tion, of which Juan Luis was campus--details to be announced later­ President, has decided to esta­ -to raise more monies. Other fund­ blish a special scholarship fund raising activities are in the plan­ in his memory. The fund is the ning stage. Juan Luis Tienda Raza Memorial SCliOiai?S'hip, to be administered We respectfully ask that you help us by the law school 's f inancial aid with whatever you may wish to contri­ office. Proceeds from the fund bute ~ither by donating at the above are to be used to provide finan­ mentioned events or by leaving your cial assistance to needy Spanish­ contributions a the La Raza office speaking students. at Hutchins Hall, room 114. Juan Luis was driven by a tremen­ dous desire to practice law in or~ der to serve those in greatest Notices · need of legal assistance, particu­ larly Spanish-speaking and other The University of Michigan Law School will minority groups t hat traditionally establish the Hessel E. Yntema Professor­ have not had full access to the ship of Law, honoring one of the School's services of the legal profession. distinguished former faculty members. He approached this goal with the zest and determination which char­ Prof. Ynterna (1891-1966), a research professor· of comparative law, was a member acterized his many, many endeavors. of the U-M law faculty from 1933 until his During the two summers previous to retirement in 1961. his death he worked for Michigan Migrant Legal Ass istance Project. At the t:j_me of his death he was "probably He expressed his strong interest the world's most distinguished comparative in helping inmates by regularly legal scholar;" according to U-M law Dean visiting the Milan Federal Prison Theodore J. St. Antoine. in Michigan and offering his help At U-M, Ynterna was founder and first editor to anyone who needed it. of the American Journal of Comparative Law. He lectured throughout the world, and was Juan Luis Tienda's life ended a active in many international academic year before graduating from law organizations. school, ~ever achieving his goal of an active and socially conscious practice of the law. His dreams for SINGLE ROOM AVAILABLE in Legal Fraternity 1 Block from Law School. Any serious a full life were not to be. The student considered. $95/month. Very Memorial Scholarship, established in cheap parking, Call Ken at 663-3469 or his name, seeks to keep his memory Paul at 662-5157. and his legacy alive. ~ . COMMENTS all my assumptions carefully. Dan Schulman Only "facts" were to be taken at face value. Observations Today I want to start talking were to be verified, and con­ about the things this column is clusions were to be drawn only · about, but I don't know where to reluctantly. Ideally it would begin. I want to be careful, be­ work like thisa A train schedule cause like yourselves I am a law would list a train. At this student in a prestigious univer­ point I would possess only gen­ sity. Like yourselves, I have eral facts about ~rains (they grown accustomed to talking with run on tracks, etc.)r the speci­ authority and having what I say fic observation that the 9a27 to taken as truth because it is said Barcelona was to arrive on Track with authority. The worst thing Jr and no conclusions. Next I that could happen in this column would cross-check with one or two would be for me to start talking other sources (railway informa­ with authority, and have people tion, master-schedule boards). automatically reject or accept If they were the same, I would be what I say on the basis of their able to conclude that a 9a .27 to greater or lesser expertise. Barcelona was intended, that it Then I would learn nothing and would arrive on Track 3 unless you would learn nothing. What I switched. I still would not most want to do is to share things assume that my ticket for Barce­ I sometimes think about with others lona meant I would be getting to willing to think about them. Barcelona. Ftnally I would observe One of the things I often a train pull in at 9a15 on Track J. think about is the way implicit The number would be the same, I assumptions pervade our lives, would ask the conductor if it was I began thinking hard about them going to Barcelona, I l'Tould take this summer, while traveling in a seat, put my head back, relax, Europe for seven weeks with my and at last assume that barring a brother. (My first trip outside train wreck I was going to Baroe- the United Statesl) To my naive .lona, mind, if a train was listed on a Sound good? Thorough? In schedule it existed. Apparently real life I did every one of the the Italian government felt other­ above things and I still did not wise. I learned this summer that get Jis2 Barcelo~ 2.!! ~ tra'in:­ a reservation for a seat was not What I never thought to aslr was a seat~ that posted hours did not Whether everz ~ on the t r ain always mean a building would be was going to Barcelona /) It turned open, that a posted price was not ~ut 'SOme cars were only going as necessarily what I'd end up pay­ tar as Marseilles, where they were ing. I stopped expecting drinking uncoupled. Waiting in the station fountains or air-conditioning. for the next train to Barcelona I And I began to understand that thought about my system, and the z.mp many things I thought of as elusiveness of assumptions, and "natural" were really "American." the lmm ensi ty of the taslr you face (Motherhood and apple pie are far when trylng to handle them. .less American than cold orange When you start looking for juice in the morning, pitchers assumptions you find them every­ of beer, ice cubes and unlimited where. Somehow very large assump­ coffee). Nor was the matter merely tions manage to be out in the open academic--these false assumptions without being obvious. A common proved costly in time and money .• one, but a big one, is the belief Of course to an experienced trav­ that everyone thinks the same way eller all this is obvious, but I you do. Not the same things, or was not experienced. the same ideas, but in the same So I decided I would examine manner. A friend showed me this 3 <.ONI. p 4 c.oMNIIfNTS for the students have included prizes, i~­ COMMENT~ proved placement and admissions operations, onea Close your eyes. (After support of a number of student organiza­ reading the instructions I ) tions , etc. Some of the money has been Picture a cat. It can be used to assist faculty research, purchase a cat you know or any cat, but of equipment useful in instructional pro­ 'not a drawing of a cat. A real, grams such as closed circuit television and 11 live11 cat. video-tape recording and viewing equipment, Got it? Give it white paws. and to augment the resources of the Law Now make the tips of its Library. ears pink. Open your eyes. Finally, at the end of the story we It may be surprising to you reported, on the assurance of Professor Roy to learn that there are people F. Proffitt, who has general administrative who will close their eyes and see responsibility for the Fund, that copies of only blackness, others will 11 ~ 11 the printed report for the Fund for 1974 a cat so three-dimensional that (the 1975 report was not yet available) would only the knowledge that t heir be placed on the table in front of Room 100, eyes are closed prevents them and you could help yourself so that you could ~rom thinking it is real. Most see the growth pattern or the Fund for the people fall somewhere in-between-­ first fourteen years. Through some over­ they see it blurred, or in quick sight (that is what the Professor said) glimpses, etc. This is not lim­ those reports were never distributed . ited to pictures of cats, either. However, he has assured us that they will Test this out on fri ends--it's be placed on the table this week, he hopes illuminating and people like to you will help yourself, and enjoy what talk about it. you see. He will also provide extra I believe people differ copies of the brochure that was used drastically in the way they think last year, so that you can see the l it­ all the time. But I will leave erature that was distributed to the off for now, before I get too alumni. involved, and talk more next week. · At a later date, when the 1975 report s are finally delivered from the LAW SCHOOL FUND printer, and at a still later date when the res ~ lts of the 1976 campaign, which Last spring RES GESTAE carried is just getting underway, are available, a story describing the Law School Fund, we will pass them on to you. and suggesting that it would be a good idea for students to get a cquainted with The Fund has also helped with the re­ it because it would be a friendly neigh­ habilitation work and the purchase of new bor knocking at your doors from time to beds, carpets and draperies in the Lawyers time for years to come. Club, some additions and alterations within the buildings, construction of interview The story also explained how the rooms along the edge of Room 200, etc. entire school--students, faculty and staff benefits from the Fund . In fact we reported In addition, in that story we reported there is scarcely an aspect of t he Law School that the Fund in 1975 had just completed its that has not been enhanced by the presence most successful year, and we concluded that of the Fund during the fifteen years of its it would be difficult to over-estimate the existence. About 25% of the gifts are ear­ importance of private giving to the "good marked one way or another by the donor. health" of the Un .lve rsity of 11Jchigao Lnw The balance is unrestricted . The various School. financial aid accounts for needy students have received substantially more than one­ half of all receipts. Other direct benefits THE FIRST AMENDMENT ON TRIAL

The ongoing dispute between the three major television networks, the League of Women Committee chairman Otis Pike and the great Voters, and the two presidential candidates majority of committee members were anxious over coverage of the upcoming debates in to have the report released to the public Philadelphia is just one of four major and only an objection by Republican threats in recent weeks to the First Amend­ congressman Robert Bauman stopped its ment rights of the press. publication.

The debate controversy centers around two The report was then shunted aside until points: that the networks be allowed to President Ford had decided on the "secrets" show audience reaction shots, and be given it contained, none of which had been the freedom to choose the reporters who secret since the Times and CBS had re·· will ask the questions. ported on them weeks before.

Both Ford and Carter have said that they So the entire issue revolves around that feel audience n:9Ctions could influence the bureaucratic propensity to label every• television audience. thing i n sight "secret", and keep the public in the dark about anything even In Fresno, California, four reporters from remotely embarrassing to old friends and the Fresno Be e were jailed "indefinitely" the government in general. for refusing to reveal their source of secret grand jury proceedings in a local It doesn't take any great knowledge of the corruption case. First Amendment to see that the government's idea of freedom of information and the Two Twin Falls, Idaho, newsmen were jailed public Is right to know are backwards. Their for refusing to reveal their sources as way of thinking has it that the public well. should find out only "t-7hat the government wants it to find out and that their first The fourth, and most seriou~,issue in­ loyalties are to themselves, not to the volves Daniel Schorr of CBS. Schorr, who people who put them there. had been covering the CIA investigations in the House Intelligence Committee for nearly All four of these incidents point to a a year and a half, received a copy of the critical juncture in First Amendment committee's report at the end of their in­ interpretation. vestigation and turned it over to the New York Village Voice, which ran the report The greatest revelations of government in its entirety. scandals, from Teapot Dome to the Pentagon Papers to Watergate, were the result of Schorr recently appeared before the House aggressi ve investigative reporting. Ethics Committee on contempt of Congress charges and faces a possible jail term and They point up more clearly than words can heavy fines if he does not reveal the source say the need for an independent, free of the report. He has consistently refused press that can cut through bureaucratic to do so. · smoke screens and allow the public to see the truth. The Schorr issue, on the surface, looks like a case of one newsman defying the This is an issue that should be of primary wishes of Congress and being made to pay concern to all of us, not just the press. the penalty. But a look at the facts shows When the freedom of the press is curtailed, the folly of the entire incident. the excesses of government will multiply to levels we shudder to contemplate. It is a fact that both the New York Times and CBS had been reporting on the major Supreme Court Justice Hugo Black said it stories contained in the report for weeks all when he noted, "Let's see; (the First before its publication in the Village Voice. Amendment says) 'Congress shall make no 1aw I ... , Now that means no law, doesn't The leaks on the committee had reached al­ it?" most flood levels prior to the committee's (Reprinted without permission - fYnm rhP F.~stern Echo.) MINUTES OF THE LSSS MEETING Rctivlty, l~gal Hcholarship, and lndeeJ September 9, 1976 the legal profession were real and sub­ s tantial. Call to Order Be it further resolved that we join with The meeting wa s called to order at 3:40 the entire Law School community in a p . m. by President George Vinyard in the tribute to the memories of Juan Tienda Faculty Dining Room of the Lawyers Club and Alan Polasky. Lounge. Members present were: Janet Anderson, Deb Armbruster, ~ri c Martin, :. Motion carried unanimously. Gwen Mosley, Jeanette Ramseur, George Vin­ yard , Deborah Friedman and Mary R. Harsha ... LSSS Office

Law School Yearbook The phone number is 764-9408. Office hours are: Deborah moved t hat the University of Michigan Law School Student Senat e grant Pres. George Vinyard: W 10-11, Th 10-11:30 , to Edward A. Marod , doing business as "The F ll-noon. Law School Yearbook," the exclusive right in 1977 to publish an official University Treas . Mary Ruth Harsha: Th 10-11:30. of Michigan Law School Studen t Yearboob Provided, that he agree s to submit t o The meeting was adjourned at 5 p.m. LSSS accumulated information and a brief report on his operations. Mot ion carried Janet L. Anderson unanimously. LSSS Secretary

Regular Meeting Time MINVTES OF THE LSSS MEETING Gwen mbved to make Thursdays at 3:30 p.m. September 16 , 1976 the regular meeting time for LSSS. Motion carried unanimously. Call t v Order

Committee Positions The me ~ ting was called to order at 3: 40 p.m. by Pr e ~i dent George Vinyard in the Faculty Dean Pierce needs 5 s t udents to wore on Dining Room of the Lawyers Club Lounge . the Building Committee. Member t:> present were: Janet Anderson, Deb Annbruster, Deborah Friedman, Sandy The Faculty/Student Administrative Judicial Gross , Mary Ruth Harsha, Gwen Mosley , Council has openings for 2 students. Jeanette Ramseur and George Vinyard .

Insurance Program App ointments/Approvals

Jeanette moved to authorize George Vinyard Gwen mpved to approve Jesse Jones for to send the letter endor sing Mr. Farris Electi.ons Committee Chairperson. Motion A. Hawrani's insurance programs. Motion carrie ~ unanimously. carried unanimously. Debora ~ moved to approve Joe Medved for Recognition of the Deaths of Alan Polas ky Faculty/Course Evaluations Chairperson. and Juan Tienda Notion carried unanimously.

Eric made a motion that LSSS recognize the Deb moved to approve Mark Fuhrmann and deaths of Professor Alan Polasky and Juan Jack Helms as Co-chairpersons for the Tienda. The motion read: Be i t resolved Sports Comm ittee. Motion carried un~ that the Law School Student Senate and the ':limously. student body of the Un iversity of Michigan Law School recognize the recent loss of two Gwen moved to approve Rick Durden as members of the Law School community. The Chairperson of the Film Committee, m ot ion deaths of Juan Tienda and Professor Alan carried unanimously. Polasky have left gaping voids that cannot be easily filled or forgotten. Their Deb moved to approve Donn Randall as Chair respe · t ive contributions to student life and person of the Social Committee. Motion carried unanimously. {C: ' (\! .- (' 7 ) .... LS.SS · (coNT.1j - Hakim Adjoua resigned as ~ffiA Represen­ sandy moved to approve Ros s Eisenbrcy as tative. Gwen moved to appoint Bill chairperson of the Speakers Connnittee. Bay as MSA Representative. Motion carried 6 in favor , 1 opposed. The motion carried unanimously. cwen moved to approve Nehad Othman as Editor­ Disbursement Controls Proposal in-Chief of the Res Gestae . Motion carried It 1s proposed that the following re­ unanimously. strictions be imposed upon the manner of expenditure of LSSS funds by spon­ Gwen moved to approve Paul Jones and sored groups and committees, and that as Co-chairpersons for the Resi­ these restrictions be incorporated as dential Committee. Motion carried unani­ appropriately numbered sections of the mously. LSSS code dealing with Fiscal Account­ ~bility and Budgetary Planning: Jan moved to approve Hakim Adjoua as MSA 1. That the following types of Representative with Bill Bay as his alter­ "hc arges " requ1re. pr1or. approva "lb y one nate. Motion carried 6 in favor, 1 member of the Senate Executive Commit­ abstention. tee (Pres., V-P, Sec ., or Treas.)-- a. use of the Law School postage Gwen moved to accept George Vinyard's meter for mailings recommendation of Liane Lawrence, Merton S. b. ordering supplies through Uni­ Marsh to be on Judicial Council with James versity Stores or the University Widland and Phyllis Rozof as alternates. Cellar. Motion carried unanimously. c. copying services performed by the Law School Copy Center. Painting of the Black Post~ d . goods and services provided by the Lawyers Club. Deborah moved that George Vinyard be 2. That telephones in all offices authorized to talk to Art Mack and urge allocated to student organizations him to have reflective or flourescent stripes sponsored by LSSS be restricted to painted upon the black posts barring the local calls only, with toll calls per­ various entrances to the Law Quad. This mitted on one or two central supervised is in the interest of those students walking phones where complete records-may be--­ and riding bicycles through the Quad at kept·of the calls charged to the Senate night who may collide with those posts account. due to lack of visibility. Motion carried unanimously. 3. Tha t LSS S f unds will not be dis­ bursed for sponsorship of any event Meeting was adjourned at 4:50p.m. held at· a location outside the Law Quad ran~le without prior specific approval by vote of the Senate. MINUTES OF THE LSSS MEETING The motion carried unanimously. September 23, 1976 LaRa za Re.9ues_! Call to Order Gwen moved to delay consideration of The meet1ng was called to order at LaRaza request for budget adjustment 3:45 p.m. by President George Vinyard unti l next week. in the Faculty Dining Room of the The motion carried unanimously. Lawyers Club lounge. Members present were Janet Anderson, Deb Armbruster, BLSA Request for Regional Conference Sandy Gross, Mary Ruth, Eric Martin, Eric moved to allocate from Senate Gwen Mosley, Jeanette Ramseur and funds $91.00 for the regional con­ George Vinyard. ference in Indianapolis. The motion carried unanimously. Minutes of Previous Meetin s Jeanette moved that LSSS recommend to T e m1nutes -or t e September 9 and Dean St. Antoine that he consider September 16 meetings were approved. BLSA's request for $205.00 which in­ cludes food and room. Committee Resignations The motion carried unanimously. Ross Eisenbray resigned as Chairperson cotv/. p 8 L ':)S~-=> The question then remains, is a bump~r sticker which reads "Fuck Michigan" only IN THE FRANKLIN COUNTY MUNICIPAL COURT obscene. This Court thinks note CRIM INAL DIVISION The City in its Brief states tha t there is City of Columbus , no other word in the English language that is more obscene than the word "fuck." This Plaintiff word taken alone is a slang ter m meaning Case No . 29115 sexual intercourse. -vs- But, using the tests set f orth in Roth v. Thomas Harrington, United States, 365 U.S. 476 (1957), we must consider the material as a whole. De f endant Following th·e reasoning of the prosecution this bumper sticker would then be interpret­ DECISION ed to read, "have sexual intercourse with the State of Michigan." This also is absurd, This matter came on t o be heard upon the This Court cannot say that the bumper motion of the defendant to dismiss the sticker in question appealed to a prurient affidavit fi.ied h-erein and to suppress the interest iri sex. To the contrary, knowing evidence seized . the prevailing mood of the citizens of central Ohio prior to the Ohio State v . Two grounds are set forth in support of the Michigan football game, this Court feels motion. The first ground i s that the First it expressed the derogatory nature of this and Fourteenth Amendments to the United mood towards the University of Michigan States Constitution requi res a j ud i cial football team and the State of Michi gan a s determination as to the obscene nature of a whole. It is also the belief of this the material alleged i n the affidavit prior Court that most of the citizens of centr al to an arrest and seizure; the s econd is that Ohio would feel that it had some "redeeming the material alluded to in the affidavit is social value ." not obscene on its face. This Court therefore finds that the bumper The facts of this case indicate that the sticker objected to was not obscene and defendant was arrested and charged with that ~he affidavit should be dismissed . violation of Section 2343 ,02 of the Columbus Municipal Code on the 18th day of October, 1970.

At the time of his arrest the defendant L SSS ( c.o~>~r FttoM pi) was driving a 1962 Volkswag on with a bumper sticker which read, "Fuck Michigan," pasted Beer Party to the front wt.dRhield of his automobile. Sandy moved that LSSS approve use of the recreation room of the Lawyers For the reasons set forth by Judge Williams Club on the evening of Sa turday , in the case of Adult Cinema v. Maynard September 25, 1976, for a beer party Sesenbrenner, Mayor, being case #241748 sponsored by an independent group of in the Court of Common Pleas of Franklin third-year law students which includes County, Ohio, and decided January 25, inter alia Jon Taub, Stewart Olson, 1971, this Court finds that neither the Jesse Jone~ and George Vinyard. United States Constitution or any State The motion carried unanimously . statute or City ordinance requires a ju­ dicial determination as to the obscene Elections nature of the material alleged in the af­ Sandy moved that LSSS suspend until . fidavit, prior to the arrest and seizure. October 1 , the portion of the Electlo Code calling for the polls to be open This Court also feels that it would be ab­ in the Lawyers Club after 4:30p . m. surd to make a ruling requ1r1ng a prior on election day. judicial determination of obscenity so long The motion carried unani mously . as the courts are willing to make any ef­ fort whatsoever to enforce the obscenity statutes. 8 The meeting was adjou . . 2• at READ-ONLY MEMORIES Personal to the IDditor: Last week's RG masthead listed me as "Preyil"'.g Mantis". By The Malevolent Memo Maker Just to keep things straight, better make that ''Agnostic Mantis". Another week ••• Classes are getting duller • • • And harder ••• Gnashing of teeth. * * * * * * * hair pulling, and ulcers become widespread Personal to the sponsors of the ••• And the burg has started its annual party in the R.ec Room lastSaturday: Thanks l migration to 900 kilometers north of the But what I don't thank you for is the Reo Arctic Circle •. But face it--where else can Room on Sunday--couldn't you have at least you have more fun for all t he cash you're cleaned up t he half-empty and spilled cups laying out? (My list only has 3,791 other of beer? places listed, but I just started it two * * * * * * * days ago) . Did you see the flying club's Cessna on the Diag last week? Now that must have * * * * * * * been one heck of a short-field landing! When Ford was in town earlier this . Shades of Causby. • • month, he met with 20 students prior to his · Actually, the plane was taxied up speech. The 20 included representatives State Street about 4 AM . Now, can you from several student groups~ students f rom imag:tne a student driving home after an medicine, engineering, LS&A, a token evening of sampling the local brew and/or minority or two--but not a single law weed, waiting at the stop sign on t1o nroe student. In fact, law seems to havG been as an airplane goes past? That. ' s ~noug h the only major school on this campus that t o make you swear off for a few weeks! wasn't represented. Why? Good question, but no good answer. ·li-*** '* ** Since Ford is, aft er all, an attorney, it And now, a first for ROM--an would seem quite proper to include a law unprecedented second straight '''rha.nks For student in the group, right? The head of Nothing" award to the Parking Office. the Ford student campaign group said that A...s you may recall, I mentioned last she wholeheartedly agreed. However, she week that my car was broken into twice and claimed to be unable to do anythi ng about that t \ro antennas were stoleri last year on it, despite the fact her group t ook credit Univer ~ it y lots. Well, add another for the operation. I was told to contact a anten~L--this time, the AM, rather than CB. bigwig in student government--who was Come on, Parking Office! Take your always conveniently "Out of the office for thumbs out of your parking meters and do just a minute" when I called. He never somethf !JK to justify that outrageous rate bothered to return any calls, either. increal5e 1 Well, now you see how we stand with the rest of the University. Isn't it nice * * * * * * * to feel wanted, even if it is just for all Being a relative newcomer to these our money? frozen northlands, I'm still le, ;: ~ning naw thingsabout. thia state. Heard yesterday * * * * * * * · that the proper t erm for a gentleman from Ford may get my vote anyway, if only this state i s "Michigander". fues that for the inter nationally-important decision mean that a female res:l..dent is called a on high-level policy he announced last week. "Michigoose"? He decided that the first space shuttle . . ·*'"'****** orbiter module would be named the "United I know there's at least a few Stat es Shuttle Enterprise". Star Trek lives! libbers out there who ' ll consider t~e * "*'** *** previous item to Qe a cheap sexist Joke. Jimmy Carter announced in a recent Not so! It cost almost a whole interview that he had (to use his term) · quarter. * * * * * * * "lustedafter" a number of women. There is absolutely no evidence t hat Betty Ford was Hint for first-year students: When included in t his group. the prof says, "The Court's reasoning in this landmark ruling is intuitively It's rumored, though, that ~~s. ·Ford has had a few impure thoughts abo ut Smilin' obvi ous", what he really means is, "There Jimmy, but psychologists attribut e this to must bt:: some logical reason for t his stupid decision, but I sure can' t think of one ." a simple case of peanuts err.ry. 9 I r;. wHe;Res HI~ PAF

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"Wha t a stroke of luck. This man jus t happens to be my lawyer." ./.d -~~ . Pr imary area of practice is to establish a dictatorship of the proletariat by allying LAW FIRMS THE PlACEMENT OFFICE OVERLOOKED themselves with militant rank and file By workers, tenant unions, disaffected sons Crusader Rabbit and daughters of the bourgeois1.~ and the underground revoluntaries. This being the time of year for Law Firms to invade the school for their annual head (6) Remainderman, Reversion, Shelly, hunt for hiring legal guns, the Placement Worthiertitle, Bailee, E. Zment, Tate, C.V. Office has been busily playing matchmaker Nant, Deed, Trust, Will, & Lord - firm is between students and i nterviewers. Un­ seeking applicants well versed in medieval fortunately, the Placement Office has over­ English history and can figure out the looked several firms whose exi stence should arcane mysteries of future estates, de­ be revealed to prospective job hunters. feasable fees, contingent remainders, covenants running with the land (both (1) O'Brien, Velucci, Cohen, Steinmetz, English and American law), and the Rule Nematollahi , MacDougal, La Pierie, Zapata, Against Perpetuities. Primary area of Ying, Buckmi.nster, DeLeon, Rashad, practice is in marketing real property such that selling it really means that you've Krishnmurti, Coznowski 1 Vander Veen, 9nome, Spiros, Mikado, Kerensky, Red Cloud, bought it, and buying it really means that Sukarno, Krzywicki, & Smit~ - firm is seek­ you've sold it. ing applicants whose ethnic group is not already represented among the partners. (7) Freud, Jung, Reich: & Skinne~- firm Primary area of practice is in EEOC Af­ is seeking applicants who majored i n firmative Action, and Discrimi nation cases. psychology as undergraduates and can sling psychological jargon such as paranoid, (2) Riche, Pigge, Hogge, & Monee - firm is schizophrenic, rr~nic-depressive, penis seeking applicants who salivate at the sight envy, neurosis, psychosis, infantile, con­ of a dollar and love money so much that they ditioned reflex, and positive reinforcement wouldn't buy their grandmother a nickel's with the same facility as they can sling worth of penicillin even if she were dying legal jargon. Primary area of practice is on the streets . Primary area of practice in committing poor and disliked people to is representing pharmaceutica 1 companies, mental institutions and spr inging rich and oil companies, Fl orida real estate brokers, disliked people from mental institutions. and Rockefeller owned banks . (8) Nixon, Mitchell, Kleindienst.'! Haldemann, (3) Shyster, Shylock, Ambulance & Chaser - Ehrlichma_~. Mardian, Magruder, Dean , firm is seeking applicants who can detect Kalmbach, Porter, Klein, Stans & For d - firm high pitched sirens at great distances, can is seeking applicants who have extensively drive fast cars through crowded traffic studied legal ethics while meticulously following emergency vehicles, and can slip failing to learn anything at all about it . business cards into people's clothes with Primary area of practice involves mass the ease of a pickpocket . Primary area of criminal defense of white collar criminals, practice is persona l injury, medical mal­ FBI bur glars, and CIA assassins. practice, property damage, as well as de­ fense of the above.

(4) Sherman, Clayton, Norris, LaGuardia, Taft, Hartley, Landrum , & Griffin - firm is seeking applicants for old established ~uti­ trust and labor law office. Primary area of practice is writing legislation which the firm can later poke loopholes in.

(5) Marx , Engels, Lenin, Trotsky, Castro, & Mao - firm is seeking applicants who believe that change can only come from the violent overthrow of existing conditions, who d :i. sdain to conceal their v iews and their aims, and who think that the prole- 1 --- ~ -- L -- ---L ~ .. . Jl Mi« Mill

., IIJf. fEEP HilS TCJ...J) v S 70 flPPJ. Y § ;.339 j .tf p.,p­ Inasmuch as a numbe r of our lltvlJ R£C.~ J339(4)(.:J)(,,-J(.I)CJr)(- '1)(1/i". .. readers slept through their first ses sion in Economics 101, Profes­ rr sor Conard has requested that au­ tJIJ ~ {)[} thorship of The Wealth of Nations, -- ( ( ~"""' currently celebrating its own Bi­ centennial this year , be clarified. Adam Smith, not Professor Conard, penned the words which appeared in l ast week 's issue.

3TRAT-O•MATIC FOOTBALL STANDINGS & THIS WEEK'S GAMES The W~ek in Review AFC w L T Pta PA The 1973 crncinnat1 3 0 0 72 9 oonttriued to surpr ise the experts 2 1 0 39 32 as they held off the s t. Louis Kansas City 1 2 0 39 73 Cardinals of 1974, 13-6, when a St. Los Angeles 1 2 0 41 6? Louis drive that would have tied Oakland 1 2 0 62 61 the game stalled as time ran out. The Bengals have not allowed a sin• NFC w L T Pts PA gle touchdown after three games. 3 0 0 58 .36 Elsewhere, the Minnesota Detroit 1 1 1 ?8 58 Vikings or 1973 suffered a tie, Green Bay 1 2 0 57 70 17 to 17, at t he hands of the De­ St. Louis 1 2 0 46 67 troit Lions (1970) when Viking Minnesota 0 2 1 36 53 Fred Cox missed a chip­ shot fieldgoal with less than one Detroi t at Green Bay, Dallas at minute remaining in the game. Kansas City, Los Angeles at St. Pittsburgh (1972) staved off the Louis, Minnesota at Pittsburgh, L,A, Rams (1967), 21 to 10. Oak­ and Oakland at Cincinnati. land (1973) downed Kansas City, the 1970 tea~ 35-24• Green Bay Michael Marrero (1 n67) fell to the 1973 Dallas Cc . ~·boys, 27 to 13. /2 -only · for play­ STRATOMAT I C! no; ttllls·o~nd calling but also f or his warmth There has been a tremendous and rapport with his players. outburst of curiousity regarding the 1976 Stratomatic Football 1967 Green Bay Packers Real Life (9-4-1): Winners of League--its history a nd the per­ the 1967 . One of the sonalities involved. Here is a legendary sport teams of all time. brief rundown of the teams and Offensive names like their coaches. Donny Anderson, Jim Grabowski ' ' 1976 NFC Boyd Dowler. Defensive stars like 1973 - Real Life (10-4) R~y Nitzsche, , Wil- A powerful offense l ed by the 11e Wood. This was also the year 1,000 yard + running of Calvin explosive Travis Williams set the Hill and the high percentage pass­ league record for kickoffs re­ ing of in his best turned for touchdowns. year (63%). The hard-hitting de­ Stratomatic: In 1975 the '67 Packers seemed t o have tro~ble fense.was anchored by Jethro Pugh, Bob L1lly and . · adjusting to the switch from Stratomati c: Coach Dan Schulman high-pressure coach is noted for his multiple offenses to re l axed, low-key Coach James · ~unning, and finished a disappoint- stat1st1ca• • 1 II Strata-ana lytical" ' approach to play- calli ng, and an 1ng last in the west. In tb.e play­ uncanny ability t o run off strings offs , however, Packer-pride re~ of lucky dice rolls. In 1975 asserted itself and the Pack reeled Coach Schulman led the '73 Cowboys off impressive victories in the to a league-best 11-3 record, only preliminary and quarterfinal rounds before losing in the semifinals. - to be e liminated in the semi-finals in a typical Dallas choke. This year Coach Cunhing claims the transition from the Lombardi era 1970 Detroit Lions is completed; and feels that with Real Life (10-4): The year a heal­ some luck the Pack could go all the way . thy , promising Lions team put it all together. Had they gotten past 1973 '70 Dalla s in the playoffs (how Real Life : (l2-2) : Fran Tarkenton ' s many Detroiters remember that 5-3 pinpoint passing (61%), the explo­ loss?) they might have won the sive running of rookie Chuck For e­ Super Bowl. Greg Landry hit 60% man, t he big-plays of John Gilliam , of his passes and averaged over and a steady defens e led by Car l · 7 yards a carry . Mel Farr and Altie Taylor in the backfie ld . Eller and Alan Page landed the '73 Vikings in the Super Bow l . The d~fense revolved around the Stratomatic: A new franchise and superb linebacking , led by and Paul Naumuff. a rookie coach, Minnesota native­ Stratomatic: Coach Charlie son Mark Jensen, add up to a ques­ tion mark for the 1976 season. Wol ff led the '67 Balti mor~ Colts to a s econd place finish in the Coach Jensen's philosophy of con­ Eastern Conference l ast year, but servative, controlled offensive was eliminated in the auarterfinals and defensive play fits the tern- of the playoffs. Unhappy with the . perment of his team perfectly~ team attitude in Baltimor e, he's With square jaw and impassive face changed his franchise this year to he lacks only a headset to make Viking fans forget . coNT. ' 7n nor~~ir r.nRch Wolff is noted 1 ~ as did recai~er Otis Tayl or. Super­ 1974 St. Louis Cardinals flea Warren McVea eluded peop le Real Life (10-4): The year Ter ry while Tank Robert Holmes r a n over Metcalf set the record for total them. Defensive standout s were offense and a Jim Hart t o Mel Gray familiar names like Willie Lanier , touchdown was as likely from any Buck Buchanan, Curly Gulp, Jim one place on the field a s another . Marsa lis and Emmit Thomas. The defensa was weak against the Stratomatic: In 1975 pr eposterous run but strong against the pass, Coach Chestet "Guy" Labedz t ook t he led by all-Pro Roger Wehrli. 1972 Super Bowl Redskins t o a 7-7 St ratomatic: In 1975 St . Louis­ season in the most r ounda bout fa shion born Coach John Hugger was brilliant imaginable. He beat every other but e rra tic, and as a result his team in the league once and l ost t o Cardinals were dangerous but e rra­ every team once, and still holds the tic. Only late in the season did record for most points allowed--52. the team get untracked, winn ing 3 This year Coach LaB. decided that of its last 4 games and edging '67 the conservative, George Allen- trained Green Bay for third place in the Redskins did not l end t hems elves to West . This yea r Coach Hugger has his style of hunches a nd gamb les and adopt ed and modified a form of Dal­ switched his franchi se to Kansa s City, l as St rata-analysis and expects t o where the Hank Stram Chiefs ha ve the add cons i stency to the explosive ­ versatility t o cope with Coa ch LaB's ness of his team. I f he can get demanding multiple offense s. Unlike that consistency the Cards , always St. Louis Coach Hugger, Coach Labedz tough in their home Mile -High apparently ha s no int ention of stadium, may be the surpr ise of a chieving greate r con sist ency, and the league. will r ema in the least pr e dictab le and most da ngerou s coach i n the 1976 AFC l eague on any given day . 1973 Cinncinnati Benga l s Real Life (10-4) : Essex J ohnson 1967 Lou Angeles Rams and Boobie Clark shar ed 1,000 yard Real Life (11-1-2 ) : Roman Ga b - seasons, Ken Anderson pa ssed to ·· riel had a n excellent yea r, ver ­ excellent receiver s I saac Curtis satile back Les Josephson r ushed and Bob Trumpy. The defense was for 1 , 000 yards and was a respect ­ good, with a fierce pass r ush and ab l e r e ~ e i ve r, a nd spli t end J ack good secondary. Bill Bergey had Snow av ~r aged a phenome na l 26 ya r ds not yet been traded a nd anchored per r ecept i on . The ' 67 Rams had the middle . perhaps the best defensive line in Stratomatic: Rookie Coach Ra l ph history--the original fearsome f our ­ Hall had an imp r e ssive exhi bi tion some of Deacon Jones, Roger Brown, season, and as of press time an Lamar Lundy and Me rlin Olsen . even more impr essive s tart t o the Str a toma tic : Coach Fred Fathe is regular season. He has not allowed noted f or his i mpeccable coaching a touchdown in wi nning his f i r st a nd terrib l e luck. In 1975 he led three games by an average margi n t he 197 3 Rams to a di sappoint ing of 24-3. Whe ther young Coach Ha l l 5-7-2 record, which included sev­ can keep up t he pace r ema i ns to er a l over whe l mi ng vict ories (52-7 be seen. over Washington) and many close def eats . Claiming his hatr ed for 1970 QB John Hadl as the r eason, he opted Real Life (9-5) : All-purpose this year for an L.A. t eam before back Ed Podolak ha d a great year , ( C.ONT.) ..: I'-/ 1973 and the noxious Hadl. Now, Super Bowl, and was insufferable for if the law of averages has any weeks afterward. This year every­ validity at all, Coach Fathe can one_is gunning for the champs, and expect better luck in 1976 and should be a top AFC contender. Pittsburgh will have a long hard road back to the Lawyers Club 1973 Oakland, Raiders Lounge and a second Super Bowl. Real Life (9-4-1): Ken Stabler A final note: The mo st interest­ hit almost 64% of his passes; ing aspect of Strato is not the Clarence Davis and Marv Hubbard way in which the personalities of formed a perfect outside-inside the coaches determine the manner duo. Phil Villapiano and Jack of play of the teams, but the way Tatum were standouts on the the nature of the team increasingly grudging defense. alters and determines the person­ Stratomatic: Raider Coach Jim ality of its coach, eventually Blake plays his team to perfec­ turning him into a raving madman. tion, his gruff and surly exter­ ior hiding one of the finest foot­ minds in the league. In 1975 surly Coach Blake led his Raiders to a 10-4 finish (first in the West) and a Super Bowl spot. Tough a~ HOY£'~~ O~E~ - . AJ..Jv~"E'i:. -· ' .. "- he is on the road, surly Coach ..)- 8£ S £ !fT £ D • " Blake is almost unbeatable at home in Oakland Stadium (known mote com­ monly around the league as the !)#] Snake Pit). ( " THAT :S --THE- /IJOST zm hJOIJ;jT liAJD 1972 Pittsburgh Steelers Po"'-' 1£/!.Fu/.... Plii?SOIJ Z~>J THE Real Life (11-3): The year of Franco Harris and his miracle last­ )' J.. A l.J SC.. /-100 k • '' second catch. Beside Franco's phenomenal rushing the Steelers had little in the way of offense. Of­ ~(j ~f) fense was unnecessary, however, as !!M''t':" ...... the Steel Curtain shut down its TH/i opposition and consistently turned the ball over to the offense in good field position . Defensive stalwarts were Mean Joe Greene, (J(j Ernie Holmes, Andy Russell and J ...... -.. Jack Ham. ----141 ----·· --- ' ·------.. -~~- .. ---· - -~-~- ,· -~ --- ·"""' Stratomatic: In 1975 , under Coach /v'OP~ ;ri-l.t Z-J?t sfoi!.T.S c~Ae.'" Mike Marrero, the Steelers finished a mediocre 6-7-1, last in the power­ ful Eastern Conference. Then, in an astonishing turnaround, Coa ch (j(j Marrero swept four straight games .) in the playoffs, including a hard­ ( fought victory over Oakland in the 1'5 poll ------~------~--~------~ Even with some intentionally inflated point COLLEGE spreads , 34 of the 37 favored terns were consensus picks in last week's poll. But, Wake Forest (38 1/2) at Michigan unlike two weeks ago , picking favorites UCLA (3 1/2) at Ohio State was not a successful stragety. The median North Carolina State at Indiana (6 1/2) individual score droppred to 15-22, and the Texas A & M at Illinois (4 1/2) consensus was a horrendous 10-27. Only 15 Iowa (13 1/2) at USC of 89 entrants picked more winners than Notre Dame at Michigan State (14 l/2) losers, so if your record was poor you had Minnesota at Washington (12 1/2) plenty of company. Arizona at Northwestern (14 1/2) Miami,0.(6 1/2) at Purdue John Nuanes pulled off the comebacks of the Wisconsin (13 1/2) at Kansas week by jumping from last place two weeks Oklahoma at Iowa State (20 1/2) ago to the top spot l ast week. John went North Carolina (15 1/2) at Missouri 23-14, and edged out Ralph Scherer, Greg Miami Florida (27 1/2) at Nebraska Need, and Bob Kohorst on the tiebreaker. Stanford at Army (23 1/2) Those four also take the early lead in the Alabama at Georgia (1 1/2) cumulative poll. John can pick up his prize Auburn (6 1/2) at Mississippi from me at K-43 Lawyer 's Club. The low man LSU (2 1/2) at Florida on the totem pole was Mark Kellman, whose Penn State at Kentucky (8 1/2) 7-30 even outdistanced Ned Othman's 9-28. Columbia (4 1/2) at Penn Brown at Princeton (9 1/2) Here are this week's games. Game rules as Pittsburgh at Duke (23 1/2) always - Circle winners and cross out losers. Villanova (34 1/2) at Maryland Place your entry in. the box outside Room South Carolina (8 1/2) at Baylor 100 before 5P .M. Friday, or deliver it to Texas at Rice (27 1/2) K-43 before noon on Saturday. Boston College at Navy (24 1/2) Arizona St . at Wyoming (13 1/2) RG RANKINGS Points PRO .1. Michigan (9) 180 2. UClA 165 Detroit at Green Bay (10 1/2) 3. Oklahoma 164 Tampa Bay (19 1/2) at Baltimore 4. Pittsburgh 153 Cincinnati at Cleveland (13 1/2) 5. Nebraska 146 Oakland at New England (6 1/2) 6. Georgia 129 Kansas City (5 1/2) at Buffalo 7. Maryland 122 San Diego (6 1/2) at Denver 8. Ohio State 116 NY Jets (13 1/2) at San Francisco 9. Kansas 105 Houston at New Orleans (12 1/2) 10. Alabama 85 Los Angeles (2 1/2) at Miami 11. LSU 82 Philadelphia (2 1/2) at Atlanta 12. usc 73 NY Giants (7 1/2) at St. Louis 13. Mississippi 73 Dallas at Seattle (21 1/2) 14. Missouri 68 Washington at Chicago (7 1/2) 15. Boston College 50 Pittsburgh at Minnesota (1/2) 16. North Carolina 32 17. Notre Dame 24 TIEBREAKER: How many rushing yards will 18. Texas A & M 21 Michigan gain against Wake Forrest? 19. California 18 20. Texas Tech 17

Also receiving votes: NAME.~= ------Penn State (10), Minnesota (10) Wisconsin (9), Colorado (8) Florida (7), Baylor (6), Arkansas (4) Auburn (2), Iowa (1) /6