10 NSRF® Connections • 2016-17, Issue 3 NSRF® Connections • 2016-17, Issue 3 11

security prison for having sadistically is about Jason, who is 7 yet socially and our responses to it cannot be Book review by Dave Lehman murdered two teenage girls, and then still a toddler. Dr. Perry presents this understood outside the context of raped their dead bodies. He was case to illustrate the importance of human relationships. Whether people diagnosed a “classic sociopath” with peers in the healing process, stat- survived an earthquake or have been The Boy who was Raised as a Dog ASPD (Antisocial Personality Disor- ing, “while we realized that ongoing repeatedly sexually abused, what der), with Autism, and suffered from relationships are critical to healing, matters most is how those experi- of psychiatry at the Baylor College Dave Lehman is the former early childhood parental neglect. we hadn’t yet fully understood how ences affect their relationships – to of Medicine, in Houston, Texas. In a founding principal/teacher of the Lehman Alternative Here Dr. Perry was called upon to important peer relationships, are, their loved ones, to themselves, and brief “Author’s Note” with which he Comunity School in Ithaca, determine Leon’s mental capacity to especially as children get older.” to the world. The most traumatic begins this book, Dr. Perry informs NY. This public middle-high know what he had done in order to aspects of all disasters involve the readers: In his closing chapter, “Healing school was named for Dave determine an appropriate sentence. shattering of human connections. and his wife Judy by the Ithaca, New York Communities,” Dr. Perry notes the “The sad reality is that these sto- (3) Three-year-old Sandy was being This is especially true for chil- Board of Education upon their retirement dramatic changes that have occurred ries are but a tiny percentage of the Being harmed by the people after 30 years. Dave was a member called by an attorney from the Public in the caring for our children, par- dren. many we could have told. Over the who are supposed to love you, being of the very first “Principals Seminar” Guardian’s office in Cook County, Illi- ticularly in this country. For example, last ten years our clinical group at the leadership group at the beginning of abandoned by them, being robbed The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog nois to testify about the murder of her countless generations of humans ChildTrauma Academy has treated the NSRF, under the umbrella for the mother. This case led Dr. Perry into of the one-to-one relationships that and Other Stories from a Child Psy- Annenberg Institute for School Reform initially lived in small groups of 40 more than a hundred children who a deeper understanding of the effects allow you to feel safe and valued to chiatrist’s Notebook: What Trauma- at Brown University. Soon thereafter to 150 people, most of whom were have witnessed the murder of a par- become humane – these are profound- he was trained as a CFG coach and of trauma on the brain, particularly closely related to each other and lived tized Children Can Teach Us About ent. We have worked with hundreds ly destructive experiences. Because then an NSRF National Facilitator. “sensitization,” “tolerance,” and “dis- in community. As late as the 1500s Loss, Love, and Healing of children who endured severe early humans are inescapably social beings, His email is [email protected] sociation.” (4) A fourth case involved the average European family con- neglect in institutions or at the hands the worst catastrophes that can befall by Bruce Perry and Maia Szalavitz, for us all…. In order to appreciate 21 children, specifically those who sisted of about 20 people whose lives of their parents or guardians.” us inevitably involve relational loss. Basic Books, 2006 how children heal we need to under- were released and survived the Waco, were intimately connected on a daily In the Introduction to The Boy stand how they learn to love, how Texas Branch Davidian compound and basis. By the mid-18th century this “As a result, recovery from trau- Why a review of a child psychia- Who Was Raised As A Dog, Dr. they cope with challenge, how stress their cult leader David Koresh. Read- number was 10 living in close proxim- ma and neglect is also all about rela- trist’s book for Connections, a jour- Perry first notes the overall situation affects them. And by recognizing the ers may recall this tragic situation in ity, and by 1960 the number in this tionships – rebuilding trust, regaining nal for educators? Because the ten facing children and young people who destructive impact that violence and February of 1993 involving the FBI country was 5! By 2000, the aver- confidence, returning to a sense of case studies which Dr. Bruce Perry have experienced horrendous abuse. threat can have on the capacity to and BATF (Bureau of Alcohol, Tobac- age size of a household was less than security and reconnecting to love. Of has chosen to share--although dis- For example, PTSD (Post Traumatic love and work, we can come to better co and Firearms) and firearms viola- 4, and 26% of Americans live alone. course, medications can help relieve turbing, some might even say, bizarre- Stress Disorder) was diagnosed and understand ourselves and to nurture tions. This experience led Dr. Perry Other changes he notes include – in symptoms and talking to a therapist -just may be encountered in your introduced only recently into psy- the people in our lives, especially the to form one of his major conclusions 1905 only 1% suffered depression, by can be incredibly useful. But healing school. I suggest that his approach chiatry in 1980. Today it is believed children.” about healing traumatized children: 1955 it increased to 6%, and in 1955 and recovery are impossible – even to healing these young people offers to affect at least 7% of all Americans “Relationships matter: the cur- teen depressions have increased by with the best medications and ther- valuable insights for all of us to heed, Here is a brief overview of a with an impact that is far greater in rency for systemic change was trust, a factor of 10! Dr. Perry states, “The apy in the world – without lasting, particularly when, as he notes, our sample of 5 of the 10 case studies children than in adults. While not all and trust comes through forming disconnect between what we need caring connections to other.” child welfare system, social workers, described in detail in this book. What children fortunately will ever experi- healthy working relationships…. The in order to be mentally healthy and and foster parents are typically over- I found particularly useful are Dr. Per- That’s a message which all educa- ence any of these events, approxi- seeds of a new way of working with what the modern world offers can worked and under-trained. ry’s discussions of his own thinking, tors and all parent/caregivers I think mately 40% of American children will his reasoning and unique approaches traumatized children were sown in also be seen in the constant unease need to hear in this day and age of an The lead author is an American experience at least one traumatizing to healing these individual young the ashes of Waco.” felt by parents – about the internet, over emphasis on academic learning, psychiatrist, currently the Senior event by the age of 18, including the the media, drugs, violent predators, people, beginning with deep listening, For those of us who are teach- the common core, and the loss of time Fellow of the ChildTrauma Academy death of a sibling or parent, ongoing pedophiles, economic inequality, and and often with the littlest children, ers and/or administrators working in for our children and youth to play, to in Houston, Texas and an adjunct physical abuse and/or neglect, sexual above all, the values of our culture simply getting down on the floor and schools, whether public or private, al- be creative, to simply sit quietly, to professor of psychiatry and behav- abuse, a serious accident, natural that shape our responses to these quietly coloring. (1) Tina – Dr. Perry ternative, charter, STEM, or whatev- turn off the TV, put away the “smart” ioral sciences at the Feinberg School disaster, domestic violence, or other issues.” changes the names of each of these er, relationships are indeed key, and phones, and to even dare to touch of Medicine in Chicago. Previously violent crime. Dr. Perry ends his children – was sexually abused from creating the conditions in which every I’ll close this brief review, by first each other, to give hugs, and simply he was chief of psychiatry at Texas Introduction noting – the age of 4 to age 6 by the 16-year- child, every student, has at least one urging all of you readers who work in listen! Children’s Hospital, and vice-chair- “The core lessons these chil- old brother of her babysitter. (2) meaningful relationship with a caring schools to read this book, and sec- man for research in the department dren have taught me are relevant Leon, was 16 and in a maximum- adult is absolutely essential. As Dr. ondly, quoting this summary from Dr. Perry puts it – “People, not programs, Perry in the closing chapter – LINKS Editor’s note: In this and future issues of Connections, links to Amazon are replaced with links to Smile.Amazon.com, Purchase The Boy who was change people.” (5) The fifth case which donates a portion of your purchases to a non-profit organization you select. If you have not already set up your “…. my experience as well a the Raised as a Dog, available in research suggests that the most hardback, paperback, Kindle, Amazon Smile account and would like to support the NSRF, please select Harmony School Corporation, the parent compa- “People, not programs, important healing experiences in Audible, and audiobook CD for- ny of the NSRF. Purchases through Smile are not more expensive than other Amazon purchases, but the pennies donated mats: Via Amazon Smile change people.” the lives of traumatized children do by Amazon to our organization for each of your purchases eventually add up! Every time you purchase through Smile. not occur in therapy itself. Trauma Amazon, no matter what you buy, your beneficiary earns a few pennies. Thank you. 12 NSRF® Connections • 2016-17, Issue 3 NSRF® Connections • 2016-17, Issue 3 13

class these key questions about how questions, suggestions for teachers, to establish intimacy with yourself.’ Second book review by Dave Lehman the class will be run: “Can you agree and “text boxes” with samples of the The teachers of this technique recom- to not tell anyone outside this class actual discussion and comments of mend Bach and other Baroque music that x said y? You can share the mate- students in dialogue with the teacher. [and a lighted candle], as research in- Compassionate Critical Thinking rial, but no naming; everyone agree? They all begin with an invitation to stu- dicates it assists thinking…. The object Secondly, you must do the work. I will dents to sit comfortably, to close their of the exercise is write what you hear Compassionate to become more always show up ready to learn and eyes fully or partially, and tune into and listen to your mind speak. Don’t Critical Thinking: compassionate teach. You need to do whatever you their breathing. For the sixth part of force anything. If you think there is How Mindfulness, on a personal can.” the class session – group dialogue and something you ‘should’ be writing – level and on a questioning – there are suggested di- put the “should” on the page. Treat Creativity, Empathy, For each class session there are professional rections to teachers with sample ques- anything said or felt as material to and Socratic selected readings - photocopied sec- level to integrate tions to ask students. For example, for record.” Questioning Can tions from a variety of books from mindfulness into “Lesson Nine: The Emotion Areas of leading authors dealing with compas- Rabois ends this amazing little Transform Teaching your classroom the Brain and How to Pay Attention,” sion, critical thinking, and mindfulness book with a two-page conclusion from by Ira Rabois regardless of Part of the directions to the teacher – and each class includes six basic which I offer the following summa- subject area. It that Rabois offers include these – Rowan and Littlefield Publishing types of practice: rizing quotes [bold are my own for demonstrates Group, Inc., 2016 “The topics for today are the emphasis] – how a teacher “1) Mindfulness as open, recep- emotional areas of the brain, atten- In the beginning of this book, vari- who uses com- tive awareness: settling and noticing “One gift that a teacher brings to tion, and mindfulness. Ask students: ous people were asked by the pub- passionate criti- breath (e.g. deep or shallow, long or students (and vice versa) is the mere Ira Rabois in his home office. Photo courtesy Kathy ‘Does emotion influence how you look lisher to review this book and offered cal thinking can short) and sensation (e.g. hot, cold, fact of companionship; you live the Norris, from the author’s website. at something: And if so, how?’ That is their comments. I’ll share mine here transform student tense, relaxed), feeling (e.g. like, school year together…. You become the central question. as Rabois was a fellow teacher at the learning. Mindful- cess in classroom vignettes, it includes dislike, no preference), thoughts and family for a time. What kind of family Lehman Alternative Community School ness can help students feel at home discussions on dialectical questioning, images, and what you establish and “Name different ways you can will you be? What kind of person will in Ithaca, New York – in your course, feel more comfortable the nature of truth, as well as how discern is true. be attentive or look at someone or you be as a teacher?.... The more you with you as a teacher and with other mindfulness develops a quiet, self- something?” ‘Think of the difference use mindfulness, the better you hear “Ira Rabois – a 21st century 2) Concentration: focusing exclu- students. It can help you motivate stu- aware mind that makes effective self- between a pitcher looking at a bat- what students have to say, the better renaissance man – has taught ka- sively and pointedly on one object, for dents and engage the critical thinking reflection possible.” Thus, it is really ter, a child looking at his mother, or a they hear you. Feeling is not second- rate, philosophy, psychology, English, example, on the point where air enters process. a “how-to” book full of tips directed to person looking spaced out.’ ary to academics but at the heart of Social Studies, and drama to second- the nose, or on an image, or counting the teacher with sample discussions it…. The class is a refuge for students ary school students for over three Over the years, this instructional breaths. “Listen for student responses. from students throughout. and an example of what is possible in method was applied across a variety decades. Drawing on this wealth of 3) Visualization: progressive “Mindfulness is the education of In the opening chapter, “Begin life…. The process of compassionate experience – and using illustrative of subject areas – English, philosophy, relaxation and imaginative journey- attention. There are actually three with Mindfulness,” Rabois notes the critical thinking is critical thinking, vignettes of his students’ voices – he history, drama, karate, and psychology ing (e.g. to a time in history or a place aspects of attention: importance of how the classroom is questioning, and solving problems takes us on a journey, showing how classes. It was developed in a school where you feel safe). What you attend to. with added benefits. It is a process he has combined mindfulness medita- where teachers were given space to physically set-up with artwork, quotes 4) Inquiry: after settling the body that integrates how to live and accept tion creativity, empathy, and Socratic create a curriculum that fit the spe- written on the chalkboard, tables and How you attend. This is about and mind, introduce a word or topic yourself and all aspects of your life…. questioning to engage young people in cific educational needs and interests of chairs arranged in a hollow square, the quality of attention. You teach students not only what the students.” rectangle, or circle so students can see for the students to explore (e.g. cour- a rich, collaborative learning process The intensity of attention. High each other, with calming music playing age, freedom, love, or power). world is but how to break out of con- he calls Compassionate Critical The book includes 24 sample “les- intensity with excitement and engage- in the background [he suggests flute ditioned limits and realize what is pos- Thinking.” sons” and is divided into five chapters, 5) Compassion and empathy; ment or low intensity with disinterest music and lists several artists in his sible. Now that is a fulfilling life.” each ending with footnotes to the for example, visualizing caring for and and boredom.’” In the preface, Rabois offers the footnotes]. He then provides journals references used: chapter 1) guides understanding the emotions of another following summarizing description – for students to write their own person- The last classroom session is Les- the practice – teaching, benefits, and person. This allows you to view others “Compassionate critical thinking is al reflections throughout the upcoming son Twenty-Four: The Role of Self- application of mindfulness; 2) is about and the world more clearly and from reason deepened by empathy and by classes, and asks students to answer Reflection in Compassionate Critical knowing yourself and how your brain different perspectives. valuing the welfare of the countless the following questions – “What do you Thinking, and includes a writing medi- LINKS others who inhabit the world with us.” and emotions structure experience; 6) Group dialogue and ques- want to learn from this class? What tation using the technique of “proprio- Add NSRF/Harmony School Cor- He then describes in greater detail the 3) the emotions of anger, suffering, tioning: use conversation as an op- are your questions? List things you ceptive writing.” poration as your beneficiary at fear, joy, anxiety, worry, and greed, and portunity to practice mindfulness with purpose of the book: want me to know about you so I can http://smile.Amazon.com how they are constructed; 4) compas- others as well as to increase attention “Proprio means ‘your own,’ cep- “The purpose of this book is to better help you learn.” Rabois follows Purchase Compassionate Critical sion, empathy, and love, and how they and develop insight.” tion is ‘sensing yourself in space and show you how to run your intentions this beginning to the initial class meet- time.’ In this case, you use writing Thinking, available in hardback, are constructed; and 5) spells out the paperback, and Kindle formats: and goals into a classroom culture of ing. (Following a simplified method The classes begin with a mindful- to sense your inner orientation. Play natural process of compassionate criti- Via Amazon Smile compassionate critical thinking. It is of the NSRF Setting Agreements ness meditation practice to use with cal thinking - “building on the previous music in the background to set off this intended for anyone who seeks ways Activity) Rabois discusses with the students, including sample prompts, four chapters that illustrate the pro- moment ‘as a time and place in which