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Limits ofEstablishment Clause Volume XLIII,Number9 ment Clause as potentially “the “the potentially as Clause ment crèches. Describing the Establish- down tear to Christmastime” at Grinch the “like America town small- upon” “descend him have he recalled how the ACLU would disdain, and humor parts equal Establishment Clause cases. With for care much not did generally the bystory conceding he side of his began He spoke. became he as clear which memorial, the against speak to choice triguing either.” property] public on crosses up [putting this doing be shouldn’t also we “but said, he on stuff,” this resources social expending be shouldn’twe case, silly “It’sa assessment. this with agree to stood hoursfromcivilization. a monument, which ernment” of - gov the by neglect benign “total the emphasized He religion? of endorsement government a as serve nowhere of middle the in cross a could how simple: was argument Shackelford’s angles. different from facts the at came and standingrequirements. student nightmares like law and concerns, policy larger Neuborne made for an in - an for made Neuborne appeared initially Neuborne predictably speakers Both the de facto legal.de facto Page 5: Honey Ryderdeclaresprostitution commentator res res judicata

See but he maintained that there there that maintained he but veterans, all for admiration and respect his reiterated He upon. walk to Neuborne for tightrope political a presented the Establishment Clause. This Neuborne’s crux of defense of his father’sfor was the service respect This said. Neuborne him?” Frightened him? palled ap- have would that symbol a with service father’s] [my ize inAmerica.”partner “full a being from him keep could religion how saw father a threat. More importantly, his ther saw the Christian cross as fa- his Jew,said, a War.he As World Second the in service tional discussion his of father’s ticular. Then he began an emo- the Greatest Generation in par all of war veterans, singling out service the spoke about passionately He professor. the to something war meant a memorial, case, particular This onthesecases.”zation turns “didn’tWesternbelieve he Civili - that admitted Neuborne decorating,” exterior of law

RELIGION page5 “How dare you memorial- paused. Neuborne Then h tdn esae f h e okUiest colo Law theNewYork Schoolof University The StudentNewspaperof Joseph Jerome - Wednesday, February 10. Snowmen decorate theVanderbilt Hall courtyard afterahalfsnow dayon B at NYULaw,” Stotland said. and the public interest communityachievement for the PILC Office AnnualCareer Fair is a significant andstudent attendance PILC’sat employer in growth continued Stotland,theFair’s director. “The about the numbers,” reported year’sEve 196 employers.increase “We of 14 employersare exitedfrom last7 percent increase in employers,dents. The fairan also experienced a year’slast stu - from 2126 students 237 of increase an attendance, percent11an increase studentin experienced Fair Career PILC stillsearching forinternships, the and a large number of law students 4and5. February onplace CareertookFairLegal Law’s 33rd Annual Public Interest Schools from the NYU northeast, Law 21 from students 2300 over ersfrom around thecountry and C i r t n o y E With a weak privateweakmarketa With employ - 200 over Attracting o d r a u d b and grab burgers onthewayand grab back. Page 7: We trekoutbeyond toplay MassEffect 2 g n i t u J s n a W t i r e n ’12 e r tive note, posi- a In in. interested is she ers provided her exposure to employ noted with excitement that the viewed with fairLatinoJustice PRLDF, inter Law,who NYU at student lic interest discussion panels. job interviews, table talks and pub- two-dayfirms. The includedfair interestlawpublic andagencies defendergovernmentoffices, to est employers ranging from public LatinoJustice PRLDF. summerassociate position offer at upon oursuccess.” InterestCareerLegalFairbuilds Public Annual 34th year’s next andwill work hard to ensure that thisyear’ssuccessthefor of fair opportunities.delightedisPILC studentslawpublicwith interest is committed to empoweringLetizia La Rosa. “The PILC NYU office students,” said PILC administrator opportunityNYU greatfor a is Law NYU at Fair Career Interest Alba Villa, a second year year second a Villa, Alba The The fair gathered public inter “Having the Annual PublicAnnual the “Having February 17,2010 February Villa has since accepted a Stavan Desai - - - Opinions & Editorials Page 2 c February 17, 2010 Reality Television Helps Explore Different American Subcultures

By Mi c h a e l Mi x ’11 gregated with people like them aspects of reality TV – partying, sizes best suited for floating over me think less of Al Pacino’s Ed i t o r -i n -Ch i e f – people they knew in the old hooking up, arguments and general Macy’s on Thanksgiving.” Stasi performance in Serpico.” country, people who spoke their stupidity – the producers of Jersey is not alone, as many companies That’s why I believe that Snooki. J-Wowww. The Situ- languages and shared their tradi- Shore actually devoted a large por- such as Domino’s and American MTV has tapped into something ation. Before December, these tion. Today, this exists to a lesser tion of airtime to explaining the Family Insurance pulled their ads new and novel in reality televi- words were either gibberish or extent; people still associate with cast members’ unique lifestyle. We that were due to air during the sion – the exploration of dif- part of the name of a CNN show a certain group, be it their race, re- hear The Situation, for example, show. However, this criticism fails ferent subcultures throughout with Wolf Blitzer. By February ligion, geographic origin, favorite explain his daily routine of Gym- to realize a key point: Jersey Shore the United States. There was an 2010 though, these names have sports team, or a combination of Tan-Laundry, which probably got does not stereotype all Italians, article a few weeks ago in Slate entered the cultural zeitgeist with many factors. The result is a sub- more college kids to start washing but instead stereotypes young 20- saying that MTV’s next show relatively unprecedented speed. culture – Americans who share their clothes than any other mo- something Italian-Americans who should be called “Mass Holes” I am talking, of course, of the some identity unique to them. ment in the history of television. choose to tan themselves, blow and chronicle young citizens housemates of MTV’s mega-hit On television, The Real World We see the cast-mates fist pump to out their hair and are in the midst from our rival state, both Ken- reality TV show Jersey Shore. In previously held the title of try- house music. We see Pauly D bring of what is basically a vacation. nedy-wannabes from Harvard, case you have spent the last three ing to accurately portray young enough hair gel to coif an entire As a non-Italian viewer of Williams and Amherst as well months on the planet Pandora people in America. However, The army. The Jersey Shore works, and dis- the show, I feel offended that as blue-collar Bostonites. I think from Avatar, Jersey Shore follows Real World often felt manufactured tinguishes it from any other reality someone would think that I this is a fantastic idea, but MTV the trial and tribulations of eight as if MTV had a formula for show, because it exposes Americans would somehow conclude that should take it further as I can strangers as they picking cast to a subculture with which they may all Italians act like The Situation. think of plenty of sub-cultures stop being po- The Jersey Shore works, m e m b e r s . not otherwise be familiar. Give America a little more credit that the American citizenry lite and start Almost every I think this is would be inter- getting real at a and distinguishes it from season (with extraordinarily ested in learn- beach house in a few excep- beneficial for our ing about like Seaside, N.J., for any other reality show, tions) has society, which is Jewish-Ameri- the summer. I’ve because it exposes Ameri- at least one why I was sur- can princesses spent the last “ or two mi- prised at the omment The Guy Behind the Guy from Long Is- three months cans to a subculture with norities, one somewhat nega- Behind the Guy land, Mormons contemplating gay person, tive reaction to- c from Utah and what makes the which they may not other- one socially wards the show Indian-Ameri- show so compel- wise be familiar. conservative as many commentators said that it than that. I think most viewers cans from New Jersey. The list ling and I think person who stereotyped Italian-Americans. For can tell the difference between can go on and on. MTV already the answer is exactly the difference seems backwards compared to ev- example, Linda Stasi, a TV critic The Situation, Al Pacino, An- did it once with The Hills (if between it and a show like The eryone else, one crazy person, etc. for the New York Post, wrote that tonin Scalia, Tony Soprano, you actually consider it a real- Real World – America’s interest in In contrast, Jersey Shore makes no Jersey Shore furthers “the popular Nancy Pelosi, Rudy Giuliani, ity show, which many people seeing and learning about people bones” about the fact that they were TV notion that Italian-Americans Joe DiMaggio and Frank Sinatra. do not). I hope that MTV ig- who are exactly alike, representing a going for a specific type of person are gel-haired, thuggish, ignora- I have plenty of friends who nores the criticism and realizes specific subculture of America. – young Italian-Americans from muses with fake tans, no manners, are Italian and my opinion of that learning about different For as long as anyone can New York or New Jersey (yes, no diction, no taste, no education, them did not change one iota subcultures can help educate remember, people have described I know Pauly D is from Rhode no sexual discretion, no hairdress- because they are not part of viewers about the many very the United States as a melting Island, but just bear with me) that ers (for sure), no real knowledge the subculture depicted on the different groups that coexist pot. But this is really a misnomer. are fond of tanning, going to the of Italian culture and no ambition show. It’s unlikely that anyone in America. Because we all When immigrants came into this gym and dancing. While much of beyond expanding steroid-and would conclude, “The Situation know that reality TV is about country, they traditionally con- the show centers on traditional silicone-enhanced bodies into is a moron; his stupidity makes one thing – education. Right?

the Corporate Pet-Names Edition commentator By Marija Pecar, Sheila Lynch, Emily Wilsdon Solutions on Page 6 The Student Newspaper of the New York University School of Law Editor-in-Chief The game is this: read the clue and try to guess which law firm, bank or other corporate giant it’s referring to. If a company’s Michael Mix ’11 name consists of more than one word (not a rarity in the land of law), assume there are no spaces between names. But don’t forget the “&”. For the truly lengthy names, we have shortened them. Apologies to those who have actually gone to the Managing Editor effort of remembering the unabridged versions. Joseph Jerome ’11

Staff Editors Stavan Desai ’11 Elyse Feuer ’11 Terra Judge ’12

Staff Writers Ashok Ayyar ’11 Andrew Kloster ’10 Farrell Brody ’12 Gavin Kovite ’10 Brian Byrne LL.M. ’10 Douglas Martin ’11 Dennis Chanay ’11 Marija Pecar LL.M ’10 Erica Iverson ’11 Molly Wallace ’10 Crossword Editor Chris Robertson ’11

Web Editor Jason Law ’11

The Commentator serves as a forum for news, opinions and ideas of members of the Law School community. The Editorial Board consists of the Editor- in-Chief and the Managing Editor. Only editorials and policies developed by the Editorial Board reflect the opinion of the Editorial Board. All other opinions expressed are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Commentator. The Commentator is issued on alternate Wednesdays during the academic year except during vacations and examination periods. Ad- vertising rates are available on request. Subscriptions are also available at a rate of $15 per year. Letters to the Editor should be sent to the following address, either on paper or via e-mail. All submissions become property of The Commentator. 240 Mercer Street New York, NY 10012 212.998.6080 (phone) [email protected] News & Opinions February 17, 2010 c Page 3 Time For Congress To Stop Asking, Start Telling: Military Already Pushing to Repeal “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”

By Do u g l a s Ma r t i n ’11 The second argument is the attempt to refute these two argu- not want gays herded together and you don’t need to trouble yourself St a f f Wr i t e r one I now find myself contemplat- ments. I’m not going to point out the put in camps, but they want that with it. Gays are not asking to have ing. CNN recently ran an article testimony from numerous experts kind of behavior to remain out flaming, San Francisco-style pride While Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell about Navy Capt. Joan E. Darrah, indicating that unit cohesion would of their eyesight, because it makes parades in the middle of Fort Hood. has been discussed ad nauseam, a homosexual woman who served be unharmed. They’re just asking to be especially of late, I couldn’t resist the in the Navy for almost 30 years. She I’m not going allowed to relax and feel opportunity to join the conversation. has been with her partner for about to tell you about normal, because that’s what As someone 19 years. This Charlie Moskos, they are (if anyone is nor- who is pursu- What it comes down to means that, for the leading soci- mal anymore). ing a military years and years, ologist behind What it comes down career, the is- is that if getting rid of she could not the original to is that if getting rid of sue is particu- DADT makes soldiers’ have conversa- movement for DADT makes soldiers’ jobs larly pertinent tions with co- DA D T a n d safer or easier, or our mili- to me. jobs safer or easier, or workers about proponent of tary more effective, then of First, I’ll “ not only her the unit cohe- course we should do so. try to sum up our military more ef- partner, but sion theory, Our leaders talk all the time the basic ar- fective, then of course anything that who has pri- about how our military is guments on might indicate vately rebuked currently “stretched thin.” both sides. we should do so. that she even it and acknowl- More than 13,000 troops On the anti- had a partner. edged it as non- have been discharged under DADT side, you have two broad If she had slipped, she would have sense. I’m not DADT since it was en- arguments. There’s the utilitarian lost not only her job, but her abil- going to point acted. Some politicians say argument that our armed forces ity to work in that field ever again. out to you the that right now is “not the cannot afford to turn away qualified Imagine” trying to hide that you have anachronism of right time” to deal with the personnel, especially those in very a husband or wife for almost two the moral argu- issue. If it will keep more specialized positions such as transla- decades from the people you see ment, nor even troops in uniform, how tors. There’s also the civil rights argu- every day. If their existence is ever the difference Admiral Mike Mullen, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs, testifies before can it be anything but the ment that in a free society, people casually revealed, you’re fired and between the Congress on “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” right time? should not have to hide whom they disbarred in every state. I couldn’t do morals with which one comports them uncomfortable. To them, any When General McChrystal re- are in order to prevent discrimina- it. The strain would be unbearable. I him or herself on the battlefield and movement toward normalizing ho- quested more troops in Afghanistan, tion against themselves for engaging can’t even hide a hangover. those with which he or she acts in the mosexuality weakens the dam that’s politicians on the right screamed privacy of their own home. I’m not holding back the flood of ubiquitous for Obama to respect the military’s even going to remindMichael you that Mix ho- gaydom. judgment on military matters. As mosexuals are already serving in our To those people I say this: for DADT, John McCain himself military, and that they serve openly No one is forcing you to accept stated in 2006, “The day that the and effectively in the militaries of 25 their morals, they just don’t want leadership of the military comes to omment Your Girl’s other nations, including many of our your morals forced on them. But me, and says ‘Senator, we ought to c Favorite Columnist allies. I don’t need to do that, because you should accept their profes- change the policy,’ then I think we you’ve already heard all that. sional performance, and their right to ought to seriously consider chang- in legally acceptable behavior. The Proponents of DADT general- But I will tell you my per- work. Do I want to see gay service- ing it.” It’s too bad he seems to have former argument seems obvious, ly have two broad arguments as well, sonal beliefs, as man with numerous members making out in uniform in forgotten that. The Chairman of the and I don’t think anyone denies its although they are not the opposite of friends in all of the Armed Services, public? No, but I don’t want to see Joint Chiefs of Staff, as well as basic truth. We are at war, and we those above. The first is that doing and as a military hopeful myself. It straight ones doing it either. Fortu- the Secretary of Defense, thinks need troops. Rather, people on the away with DADT will endanger unit seems to me that those who oppose nately, there are rules of decorum we should repeal it. Even Colin other side of the debate seem to cohesion. The second is that allow- repealing DADT simply oppose that already apply to how personal Powell, who helped push the insist that such need is outweighed ing openly gay service members will homosexuality in general. It’s either relationships are conducted in the policy through, has changed his by other concerns. As such, I’ll leave endanger the “high moral standards too icky, too sinful, or too whatever, military. If you think it’s disgusting or mind. It’s time to respect the it alone for now. of the military.” I’m not going to to be accepted openly. They may morally degenerate (which I don’t), military’s decision again. DADT On Last Legs, No Thanks To NYU Administration

By Ga v i n Ko v i t e ’10 probably discouraging gay-friendly St a f f Wr i t e r NYU students from serving in the military. This is counter-productive, NYU Law has officially op- because Congress cares about the posed the military’s discriminatory opinions of gay-friendly junior offi- personnel policy since 1978. Presi- cers a lot more than it cares about the dent Obama campaigned on repeal- opinions of gay-friendly associates at ing Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell (DADT). law firms, at least as far as DADT is However, an end to the ban on gays concerned. in the military didn’t really seem So why would we want to kick close until Admiral Mullen’s remarks military recruiters off campus? To before congress last week. send a message to our community? Why? Because this odious poli- Dear Dean Revesz: It’s good that cy is all about military attitudes. Con- you take a stand as the leader of gress needs members of the military our community. But the gist of to assuage its fears. A recent Military your email is that you really want Times poll suggested that only 51 to make your students schlep off percent of active-duty military lead- campus for JAG interviews, but ers (both officers and NCOs were are prevented from doing so by polled) oppose repeal of DADT. the mean old Solomon Amend- This statistic may seem disappoint- ment. This would not help the ing, but that figure was 63 percent cause. in 2003. These are the opinions that Here’s what you should do if Congress really cares about. you want to end DADT: encour- Here’s whose opinion Con- age as many of your students as gress doesn’t care about: that of possible to slap on lieutenant’s the NYU Law Administration. Our bars and go serve in the military. administration’s policy of barring Every new soldier who has no military recruiters from the campus problem serving alongside gay isn’t exactly a masterpiece of passive men and women brings an end to resistance. It is over 30 years old the military’s discriminatory hiring and has achieved nothing except for policy that much closer. Opinions Page 4 c February 17, 2010 My First Cop-Out of The New Decade: Rejected Column Ideas

By De n n i s Ch a n a y ’11 two-day smack bender, even my was nothing left to say. ine performance. After tackling Snippet: As I enter Act 2 St a f f Wr i t e r limited edition “Princess the healthcare and the BCS, Obama of the Cave-Zone for the first Bear“ is now considered worth- 3. We Are The World 25... needs to immediately issue an time since my childhood, a shiver Sometime’s a man is called less by both serious Beanie-Baby Wow. Executive Order declaring that: runs up my spine. Tails has been upon to look deep inside of collectors and local junkies alike. when a work of art as successful taken out by a cleverly placed himself and let the contents Believe me, I’ve asked. Premise: 25 years ago, Mi- and historic as the original “We stalagmite. I’m all alone. Worse: of his soul spill out on paper. chael Jackson and Lionel Richie Are the World” goes untouched after that run in with, not one, If that man is like me, then 90 Rejected Because: Possi- wrote a simple and elegant song for over 20 years, it shall never but two, glowing robotic fire- percent of the time he will be bility of forever having my name for the cause of African famine again be revisited by it’s aging bugs I am left with zero rings. Ah, shocked and disturbed by how connected to the word ‘smack’ relief. This week, will.i.am and a creators. This goes for you too, yes, the old familiar feeling of little there is to spill. Thus, this through a simple Google search new group of stars released an George Lucas. having zero rings. The tension, week’s column: The Five Worst …. Oops. Also, see premise. updated version that can only be the nervousness, the knowledge and/or Rejected Ideas for this Rejected Because: I’ve had that only one collision with one Week’s Column. far worse on my iPod (Black Eyed of Dr. Robotnik’s creations will Peas). Plus, the public’s interest is end in certain death. The feeling 5. Man…If only I could take supposedly waning and it is hard commonly referred to amongst back all that money I spent on Beanie to think of a better cause. So, my friends as “Small Mario Babies as a child, I could really fuel a even if you’ve already donated, Syndrome” for it’s similarity to serious heroin addiction. omment why not donate again at http:// controlling a mushroom-less c wearetheworldfoundation.org/ Mario. Premise: Efficient way to Full of Sound and Furry donate/. make light of both one of one of Rejected Because: Rough the world’s most destructive/ad- 2. An in-depth review of Sega’s draft ran approximately 268 dictive drugs and a children’s fad 1992 classic: Sonic the Hedgehog 2. pages before editing. Also, I had that ceased being relevant around a better idea…. a decade ago. Alternative article described by hyphenated terms Premise: Simply kicking comparisons included: Pokemon 4. John Mayer … Wow. like: over-the-top, train-wreck back and enjoying the splendor 1. This Very Article trading cards and crack, Furbys and ear-rape. of nine, texturally-rich, 32-bit, and carpenter‘s glue. Premise: Ode to the lat- originally themed-worlds; superb- Selected Because: When est celebrity to seemingly self- Snippet: What where they ly designed early-1990’s game you’re cranking out incredible Snippet: While my nowhere destruct. thinking!? T-Pain’s latest appear- play; and the timelessness of ideas like 5-2, why not sink one near mint-condition “Speedy the Snippet: John Mayer … ance in a Bud Lite commercial the original blue hedgehog with peg lower? Turtle” could probably once fetch Wow. (“Pass that Guacamoleeee”) a ‘tude and his lovable sidekick enough money to fuel at least a Rejected Because: There comes across as a more genu- Tails, the fox with two…tails. I sincerely apologize.

Lawyering Should Stress Legal Writing

To t h e Ed i t o r : LexisNexis and Westlaw are not at associate has ever negotiated a all user-friendly programs. There multi-million dollar contract. I am writing in response to is no other way to keep our skills The whole negotiation exercise Michael Mix’s January 20, 2010, from atrophying than to do more becomes more of a burden than editorial “Lawyering Program: writing. an opportunity; I know I am not I Like You Just the Way You Yes, more writing assignments alone in having agreed to take Are.” I agree with much of for Lawyering means more work the average on every figure to what Mix has to say; Lawyering for already overburdened 1Ls, but finish as quickly as possible. classes should be kept separate it is worth it. More, and perhaps To be fair, the client in- from other courses, they should smaller, writing assignments will terviews for the Archer memo meet often and they should allow students to improve their were a valuable experience. The remain small in size because writing skills, develop their own interviews were an important they create an important social style and stay sharp over the reminder that legal problems do dynamic and, of course, they course of the year. Some of these not exist in the abstract and that supply SLAP football teams. assignments could also be done our job is to represent clients. Nonetheless, I disagree with his as group projects much like in the Moreover, it forced us to take last point that “the core curricu- real legal world (to the best of my legal concepts and turn them, lum of Lawyering should stay knowledge). Finally, more writing to the best of our abilities, into the same.” Mix may be opposed assignments could allow us to span plain English. However, the cli- to “drastic changes” at NYU the breadth of the law. We could, ents were “played” by other TAs Law, but I think the Lawyering for instance, draft a real contract where most traditional legal curriculum should be changed such as a lease so we would be research and writing programs into a more traditional legal better positioned to negotiate hire actors to play clients. There research and writing class. with landlords. Some transactional is no reason why we cannot Simply put, we do not do work would much better prepare keep the client interviews and enough writing. In all of 1L many 1Ls for their legal careers. add more research and writing. year, we have a grand total of We could also do research and Fundamentally, I disagree three writing assignments. I writing on issues of international with the idea that “psychology don’t think the World Trade law which would be a very useful and dynamics of group inter- Center assignment should even exercise for those who plan on action…are integral parts of a count because it involves no going abroad their 1L summer. legal education.” These are life research; therefore, students Unfortunately, none of this is cur- skills that cannot possibly be only produce two real writing rently in the Lawyering curriculum taught in the classroom or by pieces. While I was interviewing because it must leave room for some contrived exercise. But in at law firms, I was constantly what Mix terms “nontraditional the effort to be “cutting edge,” asked about legal writing skills elements.” we are losing basic skills like and had to lamely talk up my The nontraditional elements research, writing and oral advo- Archer memo and ICWA brief. of Lawyering are largely a waste of cacy. I think it is astonishing that When I was asked to write a time. The mediation is completely our Lawyering program has no legal memo for my internship unrealistic both due to its soap real oral advocacy component last summer, I realized I had opera plot (Did he get evicted be- to it. It is high time for NYU nearly forgotten how since I had cause he’s black? Did he get evict- Law to rethink its approach to not written a legal memo in six ed because he’s gay? Is the landlady the Lawyering curriculum and months. Legal writing is not like sleeping with the homophobic focus on the basic skills we will other writing and it is a skill that Superintendant?) and the fact that actually use as lawyers. must be honed and maintained it’s preordained that the case will by practice. Legal research skills go to mediation. The negotiation Jo s h Le v y ’11 also fade fast, especially since is not much better since no junior February 17, 2010 News c& Opinion Page 5 Bunton Describes Life as Students Work to Defend Human Louisiana Public Defender Rights During the War on Terror By Ed u a r d o Ja n s e n ’12 ter for Human Rights and Global rights campaigns.” The fieldwork By Za c h Or j u e l a ’12 federal and state funding, and Co n t r i b u t i n g Wr i t e r Justice (“CHRGJ”) Faculty Director is complimented by in-class Co n t r i b u t i n g Wr i t e r in 2007, Louisiana restructured Smita Narula and CHRGJ Research seminars where students come the state’s ailing criminal defense Before coming to NYU Director Jayne Huckerby who cur- together with peers and reflect Derwyn Bunton ’98 took services with the Public Defender School of Law, student Wade rently oversees the students’ work in on issues and obstacles they may over the Orleans Public Defenders Reform Act. The new law gave McMullen ’11 knew very little representing the clinic’s two clients face over the course of a career (OPD) in 2007, and since then, he Bunton the necessary tools to re- about the human rights abuses Mohammed Al-Asad and Mohamed in human rights. has seen some outrageous stories. form the public defender office, committed by governments dur- Bashmilah. Both Mr. Al-Asad and For those students work- On February 1, he recounted sev- and he began in earnest. Today, ing the “War on Terror.” “In my Mr. Bashmilah were ‘disappeared’ ing on the cases of Mr. Al-Asad eral to a packed Lipton Hall during the Orleans Public Defenders ignorance it seemed too much like and rendered to CIA-run ‘black-sites’ and Mr. Bashmilah, they are in his aptly named presentation: “I are 50 full-time lawyers. They a domestic political issue for me in Afghanistan and an unknown frequent contact with both men, Can’t Make this Stuff Up: Indigent have an office, conduct frequent to work on,” McMullen said, “so third country; the men were ulti- working with Professor Huckerby Defense Reform and Political trainings, and most importantly, I chose to concentrate my efforts mately released from over two years to counsel each client and keep Power in Louisiana.” they are freed from the judicial elsewhere.” of secret and proxy detention each them up to date on their cases. Perhaps Bunton’s most no- oversight that previously had These days, you can find without ever having been charged This semester, McMullen, Carey table tale was of a young OPD politicized and crippled the city’s McMullen and his fellow class- with a terrorism-related crime. and Buehler collaborated to re- investigator working on a rape case. indigent defense. mates, Laura Carey ’10 and Brian McMullen, Carey and Buehler search and write a legal brief as The investigator spoke with a child However, Bunton made it Buehler ’10, in NYU’s Inter- are three of the 14 students in this well as the actual complaint filed by witness without the consent of the clear that recent improvements national Human Rights Clinic year’s clinic that counts for 12 aca- the clinic in upcoming litigation. child’s mother; she was promptly are merely the first steps down a spending at least two days a week demic credits and is comprised of “I never would have imag- arrested and jailed – for kidnapping long road to reform. OPD’s 50 a piece working hard to fight for both fieldwork and a seminar por- ined I would have an opportunity – pursuant to an expired court or- attorneys handled a crushing case- accountability of such abuses. tion. Throughout the year, students to gain this much human rights der issued in a completely different load of over 250,000 felonies and “These men’s lives have been torn seek to explore “multifaceted ap- lawyering experience before case. “If this sounds like it makes misdemeanors last year. Reentry apart by the wrongs committed proaches to human rights advocacy graduating from law school,” no sense,” Bunton said, wryly, services for those released from against them and they both re- in both domestic and international McMullen said. “Our professors “that’s because it doesn’t.” The incarceration, though crucial to main strongly committed to the settings.” Through their fieldwork push us to be real contributors charges were ultimately dropped preventing recidivism, are beyond principles of justice and fairness and simulation exercises, students to the team’s work product and nearly a year later. OPD’s limited resources. And in their fight for accountability,” develop practical skills including include us on every decision While arrests and contempt harsh state drug policies produce McMullen said, reflecting on his “investigating and documenting concerning our clients. Because of court findings frustrate public an overwhelming number of change of perspective. human rights violations; advocating of this experience, I truly feel defenders, Bunton said such inci- arrests for possession, a serious In 2009-2010, the Interna- before United Nations, regional, 10 steps ahead in developing the dents evince a culture of stringent crime in Louisiana: a third con- tional Human Rights Clinic at and national human rights bodies; skills and confidence to practice advocacy that the city’s public viction for simple possession of NYU is being co-taught by Cen- and engaging with global human human rights law.” defense lacked just a few years marijuana earns a 10-year prison ago. Before Hurricane Katrina, sentence. public defense in Orleans Parish Bunton is always looking for Where’s the Coke? It’s All Pepsi at NYU was a patchwork of contract and bright new attorneys to join the By An d r ew Kl o s t e r ’11 Since the lifting of the ban, quiring: “do we sell Coke at the law part-time attorneys with a paltry reform movement, and he of- St a f f Wr i t e r I hadn’t thought much about the school?” The response was: “we do budget of $2 million per year and fered his advice to those seeking subject, but recently some reaction- sell Coke products on campus.” Well, no office. Local judges oversaw employment with OPD. Regarding It has been nearly one year ary has decided to put “Stop Killer I thought, this must be my mistake! and heavily influenced the distri- grades, he encourages students to since NYU wisely lifted its ban Coke” fliers up in Vanderbilt and Yet it has been one year since bution of contracts – the same “do well because it’s worth it. But on Coca-Cola products. For those Furman Halls. Never mind the fact the lifting of the ban, and five judges whose reelection prospects grades don’t matter nearly as much of you blissfully ignorant of the that the lawsuit was dismissed, and months since my inquiry. I have depended upon the speedy, but not as our ability to gauge your com- situation, a handful of imported never mind that the “Stop Killer learned much about how lawyers necessarily just, resolution of their mitment to this work.” He cited protesters (would it have made it Coke” campaign is the brainchild of and bureaucrats operate in these dockets. clinical experience, criminal justice better if it were NYU students?) one man, Ray Rogers, who makes past few months, and in retrospect In a state that leads the na- coursework, and a history of pub- pressured the University to ban his livelihood as a transaction cost I realize that Mr. Moore dodged my tion in both incarceration rate and lic interest involvement as qualities Coke following a series of spuri- in dealing with morally righteous, question. So I can buy Vitamin Water wrongful convictions, indigent de- possessed by strong candidates. ous allegations and a pending “politically aware” hipsters. No, set at the Palladium! So what? fendants were poorly represented Those who matriculate at alien tort case. In 2005, NYU pro- aside the absurdity of these weekend Where are the vending ma- and mostly forgotten. OPD will join an up-and-coming visionally banned Coke products. warriors. chines? Why is the sole soda avail- Hurricane Katrina devas- organization headed by a dedicat- Four years later, the ban imploded Here’s the real question: where’s able in the lounge areas an inferior tated New Orleans, but the slim ed, innovative leader. “Reform isn’t under the weight of its own stu- my Coke? Why does Pepsi still retain product? I hear the drumbeat of silver lining was an opportunity over,” Bunton said, “but I know pidity, and the court case ended a de facto monopoly in law school inane assaults on corporate America, to tackle old problems with new two things: we’re here, and our per- last August when the Eleventh facilities? and I see the expensive, glossy fliers ideas and new people. Enter Der- severance, pride, and hope make us Circuit Court of Appeals upheld Back in August 2009, I emailed screaming “Stop Killer Coke!” I wyn Bunton. The national focus powerful. To use the words of our the Southern District of Florida’s Owen Moore, the man responsible worry that I will not see the day when on the city brought increased clients: we ain’t scared.” dismissal of the suit. for dining services, innocently in- freedom reins in these halls. RELIGION: Neuborne and Shackelford Debate Over Cross

Continued from page 1 tect minorities from having to Shackelford had the logi- public property “we’re going to also recommended “de-natur- take such emotionally charged cally appealing argument that a have to start bulldozing things, ing” religious symbols but was could be no doubt that a cross, positions. “Religion cannot be cross erected by private citizens in Arlington, in public buildings promptly asked how to do that no matter how well-meaning, debated rationally,” Neuborne in the desert could “hardly hurt across the country.” He wondered with a cross. served as “an endorsement of said. He argued that religion anyone.” “Context is impor- what sort of legal rule would result. The two then turned to de- a parochial religious interest in politics can breed fear and tant,” he said. “This is really a “Are we going to have a per se rule bating how Buono may turn on when you want to memorialize anger, and the Establishment benign issue.” of religious cleansing?” he said. procedurals issues and property veterans.” Clause is a shield to protect “The vets chose a cross,” Neuborne suggested a sort law. While efforts were made to While Neuborne himself minorities from the religious he said. He argued that the cross of grandfathering of the memo- transfer the federal land back sees the cross as a benign ex- views of the majority. When in this context was the “uni- rial, akin to what the Supreme to private hands to avoid any pression of faith, he cautioned Shackelford questioned how a versal symbol that was picked” Court found in Van Orden v. conflict with the Establishment that the Establishment Clause former federal employee 800 and not a religious monument, Perry, the Texas 10 Command- Clause, the pair could not agree protects important principles be- miles away could be injured by adding that “most of the vets ments case. He endorsed a good whether Congress’s efforts to yond general public perceptions this cross—or have standing who put this thing up were not faith effort to make sure the affect this solution were done of religion. “Being an untouch- to be sue—Neuborne retorted even religious.” memorial explained it was not legitimately. They agreed that able tenured professor at an that “we don’t want to require However, Shackelford ap- intended as a religious symbol the Supreme Court’s ultimate American law school doesn’t tell actual yelling about religion” peared to take a cynical tack that as a potential cure to his issue, decision could successfully you one thing about how people before people can bring these the Establishment Clause was but he also reminded that not skirt the bigger Stavanconstitutional Desai who are not Christian feel about issues into court. “We pay a being used here to “snuff out” every war memorial is a cross. issues, which seemed to disap- these things,” Neuborne said. price for lowering the barrier to religious freedom. He appeared to “The veterans chose a cross point both parties. The debate According to Neuborne, entry,” Neuborne admitted, but argue that if the Supreme Court because it means something,” over the proper scope of the the entire purpose of the Es- “a prophylactic standing creates decides to remove a cross in the he said, referring to its Chris- Clause appears to be utterly tablishment Clause is to pro- a sense of calm.” desert because it is technically on tian connotations. Neuborne unresolved. Page 6 Featuresc February 17, 2010 Prostitution Should Be Dear Vandy, Why Do you Look So Gray?

Legal as it is Already By Ma r i j a Pec a r LL.M. ’10 ing makeover. I was determined fore, I stared at the gray, begging St a f f Wr i t e r to uncover at least some shred it to reveal its true colors. Are of evidence to explain the mens you a ‘cinder fox’ racing through Imagine my surprise -cor- rea behind this. However, every the woods in the ‘autumn fog’? Prevalent in our Society rection- the overwhelming crack in the wall had been filled Or perhaps a ‘wet pavement’, en- feeling of utter shock and and any imperfections glossed veloped by the ‘drizzling mist’? By Ho n e y Ry d e r weeks or so, you might want to boundless despair that rushed over. All traces of past char- A ‘winter cloud’ obscuring the get on it. through my veins when I scuf- acter had been banished into ‘urban sunrise’? No? How about Criminalizing prostitution One night stands fit nicely fled into the law school one oblivion. a ‘shark-fin’ protruding through was a terrible idea. First of all, into this legalized form of icy January morning to dis- I began to wonder, as I’m the ‘coastal dust’? it makes no sense whatsoever prostitution as well. If a bar has cover that my beloved Vandy sure most of you did, what I stood there, hearing my why a woman should be able to particularly expensive drinks (whom I had shared so many had prompted this unexpected voice echoing in the cavernous strip down, wrap herself around or if you perhaps meet early in memorable moments with and “facelift” from teen to pensioner. silence, my words bouncing off who had by then begun to Perhaps the school had received the walls, each question going un- o c c u p y answered. a special T h e omment place discourse There’s Always Money in my was short- c h e a r t ) lived and in the Banana Stand had been mind- the vic- numbingly tim of a unilateral. a pole, give lap dances and flash the night and go bar-hopping, heinous Turns out paying/tipping customers, but or maybe stop somewhere for c r i m e , that Gray is not be able to take the extra step food and he pays for it all, then subject- not much of providing an hour or two you might rack up as much as ed to a of a talker. of private, inter-sheet lessons. $75 or more in one night. Com- b r u t a l T h e n The only thing that women can pared to the average haul of a a t t a c k again, per- possibly take away from this ri- Jersey prostitute, you’re doing and a haps I was diculous policy is that for some quite well! s a v a g e too quick to idiotic reason the actual sexual Now, I know what you’re act of judge and contact must somehow be more thinking. “Yeah ok you might barba- he might valuable/worthy of protecting get some free swag out of dat- r i s m simply be than a simple striptease. So, the ing/hooking up. But what about that had Joseph Jerome shy. Maybe logical conclusion follows that relationships? Surely you can’t left him I had set if doing the deed is somehow compare a long-term, intimate, entirely my expec- extra meaningful, I should take loving relationship to prostitu- despondent and thoroughly a sizeable donation from the tations too high. This could have advantage. tion?” Oh yes I can! There’s no melancholy. The look on his likes of Eli Lilly, who hoped just been a bad first date. Maybe Obviously, I can’t sink so such thing as a free ride in this face was one of misery and to combat a downturn in the he’ll call again? low as to ask for cash from world, honey. anguish, and the bright light ‘mood-enhancer’ industry by On a different note: it’s been you, my potential mate, upfront. Think about it. Even if of hope that once glimmered tapping into the potentially lucra- said that “bad taste is a species This is mysteriously considered you’re each paying equally for unwittingly in his eyes was tive law students’ market. After of bad morals”. Since it’s hardly “wrong” and labeled as prosti- dinners and love gloves and fur- entirely extinguished. All that all, not even those of the most a novelty for lawyers to be asso- tution. But I can extract myriad niture and whatever else you’re was left was a gloomy Gray. cheerful constitution and blessed ciated with the latter, it stands to other goods and services from splitting in coupledom, there’s I wept. with oodles of serotonin could reason that the former is also not you. Guys have no problem still that pesky element of time. The only way I can de- be immune to the long-term ef- an entirely fantastic accusation. paying their way into bed with If law school has taught me scribe this is to say that the fects of gray. But each to her or his own. drinks, dinner and possibly even anything, it’s that billable hours place had undergone plastic On the other hand, perhaps Whatever rocks your boat. De gifts as monetary substitutes. are the most important thing surgery, on a scale that puts we were simply being reminded gustibus non est disputandum. (… Therefore, a girl learns to get ever. And luckily, those tell me Jackson to shame. While we that life’s not all black and white, and if it’s in Latin who are we almost anything she wants us- exactly how much my time is were all on holiday, dear Van- but a million shades of gray. How to question it?) ing sex. worth. When we’re having sex, dy had been lying silently in helpful and poetic. Perhaps gray is the new Take a step back and think we are each giving up a chunk post-op care, recovering from Whatever the answer, this black. Or, when it comes to about it. Phrases like “cheap of time that we could be spend- the mother of all transforma- was not the product of a spon- walls, the new white. date” exist for a reason. It may ing doing something else (like tions, waiting patiently for his taneous, whimsical decorating One thing I can say is that only take two drinks to win me making money… as prostitutes, wounds to heal and his scars decision. Despite what they’d like the gray is beginning to grow over. Congratulations! You’ve or, similarly, lawyers). So even to fade. Forget face-lifts or us to think. There was more to it. on me. It’s like an allergic rash: spent about $16 to win me for when you’re getting freaky with liposuction, this was a full-on The truth was out there. never quite disappears but there the night. The classier and more your loyal boyfriend/spouse/ soul transplant. Vanderbilt Next, I perused a color are days when you notice it less seasoned among us wait it out. partner (the sexual kind, not the had morphed into something chart, which I had decided would and over time you learn to live Maybe a few drinks at the bar Biglaw kind), simple economics akin to the lobby of a “luxury” be my dictionary in this foreign with its itch. And even that is the night we meet (Trick of the tells us that there’s still an ele- condo. For the colorblind. On land of hues. As clueless as be- something. Right? Day – offer to pay for a drink ment of prostitution lurking. the outskirts of Jersey. Mort- or even to buy him one. He’ll So basically, when you think gaged by Freddie Mac. purchase at least three more for about it, banning prostitution is It was as though the you than he normally would.) about as clever as banning cof- walls had wagered a bet with Solution Then perhaps dinner a few days fee but allowing cigarette smok- the winter skies to see who later. Of course, you have to ing. In other words, it’s dumb. I could be the most dreary, the make up some excuse about why only wish I could say, the next most oppressive and the most you can’t stay over that night. time a boy offers to take me out daunting of them all! Alas, Be creative! to dinner when I know he’s just the rain had soon ceased and The key is to squeeze as trying to get me to do the nasty, the sun emerged, yet the gray much stuff out of it as you pos- “Let’s skip the chow, you hand remained as gray. sibly can (remember to remain over the $50 you would have Suffice it to say that if emotionally uninvolved), mak- spent, and my apartment’s right walls could be on medication, ing sure to seal the deal before around the corner.” Vandy’s would be on Prozac: the Slut Window has closed. Alas, sex is a special form of he had become a somber and The Slut Window is a vital tool currency, usable only in certain, subdued introvert, floating in for males, that allows them to very specific circumstances. Un- the doldrums. determine which girls are actu- til the rest of the world catches After mopping up my ally girlfriend material. Sleep up with the dating scene, then, flood of tears and regaining with them too soon, and you re- I guess I have to use the old- composure, I returned to main ensconced in promiscuity. fashioned method of monetary default cynicism and began to Wait too long and the guy will exchange the next time I want look around, intent on finding assume you want to date. to buy myself something use- some plausible answers. I was Each guy’s Slut Window ful, like a hornbook. Unless of sure there had to be some is a little different (some of course my latest date is willing architectural, aesthetic or, at them might not even have one), to forego dinner and just pick the very least, satirical expla- but it’s safe to say that if you me up some commercial briefs nation for such an excruciat- haven’t consummated in three instead … takers? Features February 17, 2010 c Page 7 Peter Luger’s Cheesebuger: Worth the Trek, Well Worth the Money

By St a v a n De s a i ’11 go it’s usually for dinner and steak. with an 11:45 a.m. reservation, and is that some felt it was too big for the portioned. The fries were fine, St a f f Ed i t o r a n d However, if you want to enjoy the were seated promptly. While the amount of meat, which says some- but nothing special, particularly El y s e Fe u e r ’11 burger, you’ll have to find a way to steak is also served at lunch, we all thing given that the Luger burger is when compared to the burgers. St a f f Ed i t o r get there before 3pm because it’s only came for the burger. You can get purported to be more than half a We couldn’t finish two orders of served at lunch. order the standard burger ($8.95) or pound. The meat itself was very, very fries between the eight of us. One This week’s review is a little If we had to describe the décor you can add Muenster cheese ($1.50) good. The beef blend comes from last note, the steak sauce tasted a different and bacon ($2.95). The the trimmings of Luger’s signature lot like cocktail sauce. than usual burgers are cooked to or- porterhouse steaks and prime chuck The Peter Luger burger wins because it der but, before we get into roll. The patty was substantial but, our endorsement. Considering doesn’t re- the burger itself, we pro- at the same time, the meat wasn’t the large variety of New York ally review vide a word of caution… packed together. It wasn’t very dense burgers and prices ranging up to a restaurant Peter Luger has become which gave the burger a nice, airy, almost $30, we think the Luger but instead known for not cooking moist and delicate texture. We hate burger is one of the best out there focuses on their burgers properly. to use the word delicate because and, arguably, the best for the only one Before embarking on our this burger was everything a burger price. The one major downside, item: the burger journey, we looked should be. It was nice and juicy and besides the cooking-to-tempera- cheese- up several reviews of the had a very solid, meaty flavor. There ture problems mentioned above, burger. But Peter Luger Burger and were no frills or extraneous spices is the journey to get there. The not just almost all of them men- added. A little bit of grease and trip to Luger’s takes about 30 any cheese- tioned how their burgers high-quality meat define this excel- minutes from the Village on the burger… were either overcooked lent burger. Everyone at the table J, M, Z. While the trek doesn’t The Peter or near raw. With that said, seemed very pleased. On the side we sound too appealing during these L u g e r ’ s all the cold months, the burger is well Cheeseburger. Peter Luger, for of Peter Luger Steakhouse, we’d call burgers at the worth the trip. those of you living in a cave, is it classic (read: old). You are entirely table during our Peter Luger’s is located at one of New York’s most famous surrounded by wood and iron. The lunch were cooked 178 Broadway, Williamsburg, (and arguably best) steakhouses. tables are wooden slabs and every- about right. We Brooklyn, NY. (718) 387-7400. advise that you The burger is only served dur- order your burger ing lunch, M-Sat. 11:45-3 p.m., medium (instead Sunday from 12:45-3 p.m.. CASH of medium-rare) ONLY but there are ATMs omment I’d Cross The Street to protect against across the street or one next to c getting a raw cen- the restaurant with a large trans- For That ter. action fee. Reservations highly Now, to the recommended. To eat at Luger’s you need to thing else is pretty simple. There are burger itself. We make the trek out to Williamsburg no frills; there are no deeper mean- start with the Want more inspired ideas about (Brooklyn, not Virginia). For a ings. You are there for one reason sesame-seed bun. where to dine, what to drink, or how lot of people this makes Luger’s and one reason only: meat. Nice, crisp outside, soft and fluffy had two orders of fries, which were to cook? Check out our food blog at a hassle and so if they decide to We arrived in a party of eight, inside. The one criticism of the bun large and crispy and substantially idcrossthestreetforthat.wordpress.com Mass Effect 2 Massively Transcends the Video Game Medium

By Jo s e p h Je r o m e ’11 The first game captures a fun the Michael Bay trap. If anything, the you’ve played the first game, your hardcore types to take on a potential Ma n a g i n g Ed i t o r concept and compelling universe, scope of the story is smaller, and decisions in that game carry over, threat to distant human colonies out but the overall experience was a gi- what remains is a better, tighter ex- altering the storyline even more. in the galaxy. As your squad grows, I was a big, BIG, fan of the first ant sci-fi cliché (good marine vs. big, perience. The first game attempted No, Mass Effect 2 may not be you become friends with your crew, Mass Effect. It was the first game that bad aliens). Mass Effect 2 satisfyingly to provide the player with a number the narrative equivalent of Crime and taking on intriguing tasks to earn actually had me weighing my deci- complicates this situation, wiping the of different gameplay mechanics- Punishment, but the sophistication of their loyalty before the final suicide sions, and the experience profoundly player’s slate clean. Set two years after -some worked well, many did not. the story is pretty impressive and mission alongside the requisite black altered my conceptions about what the first title, you play a virtual free Mass Effect 2 devolves into two key the player is an active rather than hole event horizon. was possible with gaming. The first agent out to represent humanity’s components: actual role-playing and passive participant. Do you stand by One of the first companions title was a pretty cool, slightly flawed, best interests--whatever you think space station shootouts, removing while a prisoner is tortured in front you meet is the typical ice-queen, action packed interstellar adventure. those may be. Your enemies are a lot of the tedium that permeates of you? Do you comfort a daughter spending many of the games ini- And its sequel blows the first game whomever and whatever you want most 20+ hour games. who just saw her father die or turn a tial hours criticizing the player’s away. them to be. You can be a force for I’d argue the actual shooting, cold shoulder? Pushing a button to every move. Before the game is Despite two years of increas- good in the universe, for humanity, e.g., the blasting of aliens with lasers decide “yea” or “nay” is surprisingly through, we learn the ice-queen ingly high expectations inside my or you can throw everything away and the hacking of robots, is a whole harder to do when these situations exterior hides a character with a head, Mass Effect 2 is bar none one in pursuit of power or, predictably lot of fun, but even if it’s not as are vividly presented on screen. deep-seeded inferiority complex of the best games I’ve smooth as some- The wise player further sees how and daddy issues. She even breaks ever played. I tried to thing the Call of decisions in the game will impact the down in tears, after killing a whole go into the game with Duty maniacs story when the inevitable Mass Effect bunch of people first, of course. a critical eye, and for enjoy, it’s entirely 3 comes around. Being constrained Over the course of fifty hours, she the first hour, I found playable and very by your previous decisions, and goes from an unlikeable fictional every little deviation enjoyable. The ba- watching the game evolve as a result, construct to an invaluable ally. The from the first game sic set up involves is a pretty powerful experience for a game’s emotional investment is its to be an affront, but I shooting baddies video game. biggest accomplishment. couldn’t seem to put and controlling a The whole experience is aided The game’s not perfect by any the controller down. two squadmates by some stupendous voice acting. means. The tactical shooting isn’t Fifty hours of gaming to provide tacti- Martin Sheen’s casting as the am- quite as playable as something like later? Mass Effect 2 is a cal backup. It’s biguous, cigarette-smoking Illusive Gears of War, and the game still game that transcends its quite a lot of fun Man is inspired. After seven years suffers from a few of the most medium. It’s a polished, to flash freeze a idolizing the man for his portrayal irritating video game prerequisites, beautiful experience bunch of merce- of the perfect president, Jed Bartlet, e.g., silly immersion-breaking and a testament to just naries and then I felt strangely guilty for telling off minigames and some braindead how far removed video have your buddies Sheen’s morally questionable char- player and enemy A.I. routines. gaming has come from send shockwaves acter within the game. Sheen is just But I’m afraid I can’t be too Ms. Pac Man’s pursuit across the battle- the tip of the iceberg of the vocal objective with Mass Effect 2. This of her hubby. field for a some talent, but the voice acting is just one was a game I could not put down. I daresay it’s the “Hasta la vista, element that makes the characters It gripped me and siphoned away best video game ever baby” action. populating the Mass Effect 2 universe my free time like nothing has in made. If you don’t enjoy video enough, intoxicating alien orgies. The However, enjoyable tactical compelling. years. Fortuitously for me, I was games, suffice it to say Mass Effect 2 universe is your oyster. combat is only half the game. More Mass Effect 2 presents a number provided a gift of a snow day is the first title I’d throw at people But most impressing about the importantly, Mass Effect 2 redefines of different personality archetypes: to spend the whole day inside still skeptical that gaming isn’t only game is the departures taken from what it is to play a “role playing” the naive child and the violent mer- playing a video game. It felt like for twelve year-olds. If you do enjoy the firstMass Effect. Usually, the logic game. Like its predecessor, the game cenary, xenophobes and religious something straight out of middle games, whether we’re talking Mario or behind sequels is to build upon the is a digital “choose-your-own-adven- zealots. The game’s basic premise school and I must admit, some of Madden, you simply owe it to yourself first’s template and make everything ture” book. The number of storyline has the player recruiting a squad of the most fun I’ve ever had with a to give Mass Effect 2 a shot. bigger and badder. Mass Effect 2 avoids permutations is massive, and if mercenaries, scientists, and other video game. Arts Page 8 c February 17, 2010 Grammy Night Recap: Bigger Performances, Skimpier Clothing

By Ry a n Ka i r a l l a ’12 of Alanis Morissette’s “You Oughta with the dump button and muting supposed to entertain us, not scold to Kings of Leon. Maybe the voters Co n t r i b u t i n g Wr i t e r Know.” half of it). us. Besides, is an annual shame-on- subconsciously wanted someone All that said, Pink broke from Worst Performance you finger-wag from an industry suit from the rock genre to win a major With a nearly naked Pink dan- the pack this year. Her Grammy Before I lend my voice to the really going to make anyone cancel award. Or maybe, just maybe, the gling from the ceiling, a Broadway performance of “Glitter in the Air” choir of music journalists panning their LimeWire account?). Academy actually makes their picks cast rocking out with Billy Joe Arm- off her Funhouse album should rank Taylor Swift’s Grammy performance, Biggest Upset based solely on artistic merit — that strong, and music’s heavyweights among the all-time best based on I’m going to say some nice things I figure at least one of my su- it’s the music that matters to them. bidding a tearful goodbye to the King the sheer spectacle alone. Wearing about her in the spirit of giving credit perlatives should pertain to an actual That last theory isn’t likely: of Pop, this where credit is due. Whether award. Plus this pick is an easy one to the Black Eyed Peas won multiple year’s Gram- the critics like it or not (and I make as Kings of Leon’s Record of awards this year. my Awards imagine they don’t), Taylor Swift the Year win for “Use Somebody” Best Duet gave us many is the biggest recording artist in left more than a few jaws dropped. The chip shot here would be to unforget- the world right now, period. No It’s not that I think they didn’t deserve go with Lady Gaga and Elton John’s table mo- debate. Her album Fearless is certi- the award — I’ve actually been a fan performance to open the telecast, ments. And fied quintuple platinum. Beyoncé of the Followills since their earlier as it certainly generated the most now that my and Lady Gaga’s latest releases, work — I just didn’t expect them to buzz of any of the pairings that face has final- by comparison, have only gone win. And since they were admittedly night. However, one of the things ly recovered double. Fearless has also stayed in drunk when they accepted the award, that makes the Grammys so fun to from cring- the top twenty of the Billboard I imagine they didn’t either. watch are the duets that generate ing injures 200 for 63 weeks, and has sat atop Nobody saw this win coming. exciting contrast by mixing genres suffered dur- of the country albums charts for A Billboard Magazine reader survey and backgrounds. So where was the ing the per- so long she could make an adverse predicted “Poker Face” to take contrast in their performance? If formances possession claim on the #1 spot home record of the year while “Use you were going to pick artists from by the Black (No groaning! You’re reading The Somebody” polled fifth out of five. previous generations of music that Eyed Peas Commentator. You run the risk of Moreover, KoL was not even invited shared the most similarities with and Taylor bad law school jokes). to perform during the show, which is Lady Gaga (crazy outfits, outlandish Swift, I can Those facts notwithstanding, usually a bad sign for nominees try- behavior, memorable live perfor- write all about Taylor Swift is not a great singer. ing to win the second-biggest award mances), wouldn’t Elton John be them. Let’s She just isn’t. And all the album the Academy gives out that night. among your picks? There was no run through sales in the world could not make In terms of its chances of coming contrast — just bizarre and bizarre. some of the night’s highlights in a strategically-taped bodysuit that her performance at the Grammys out on top, “Use Somebody” was Besides, that performance wasn’t true Grammys fashion: by giving out makes Jennifer Lopez’s famous 2000 any less pitchy. Luckily for Taylor, to the Record of the Year category even the most exciting Grammys awards that no one cares about and Grammys dress look like a Persian she can share the blame because her that the Washington Nationals are to duet with Elton John. Try nine years ultimately everyone disagrees with. burqa, Pink climbed into a thin white duet partner, Stevie Nicks, couldn’t the NL East. ago when Eminem and Sir Elton Best Performance sheet and was lifted at least 50 feet seem to find a key she liked that Before the winner was an- performed “Stan” together. That If you missed the telecast (and above the Staples Center audience night either. Together, the pair’s failed nounced, you could have made much performance featured a genuine mix who would blame you, the Pro Bowl with no netting below (that I could harmony attempts had them staring stronger arguments for Kings of of personalities and had the added was on and who would want to miss see, anyway). She continued to sing at each other confusingly for lengthy Leon’s competitors. If you figured factor of a horde of GLAAD pro- the NFL’s two best quarterbacks — even as she was spun around at high stretches of their disastrous three- the Grammy voters were being in- testers calling for Eminem’s blood by which of course I mean Matt speed and drenched with water. And song medley. In Taylor’s defense, fluenced by record sales, then Taylor outside the theatre. Schaub and Aaron Rodgers — battle this wasn’t even a one-time perfor- she’s only 20 and still has many years Swift’s “You Belong with Me” wins. Instead, Andrea Bocelli and it out), fire up YouTube and check mance for the pop rocker either; to develop her voice. Stevie has been If you thought radio play and pop- Mary J. Blige’s version of “Bridge out another spectacular night of apparently this nearly suicidal “eff the business for four nearly four culture buzz was driving the votes, over Troubled Water” carried the Grammy performances. Making you” to gravity is a regular part of decades. What’s her excuse? then “Poker Face” would be your day. Not only did Blige hold her this pick was by far the hardest since her live show. (Dis)Honorable Mentions: choice. If you thought the Acad- own with one of the greatest tenors there were so many worthy choices. Honorable Mentions: Maxwell; Black Eyed Peas (with Will.i.am, emy wanted to reward an industry in the world, but her R&B-infused Maxwell has certainly not lost a step Beyoncé; Dave Matthews Band; Zac for reasons beyond my understand- veteran and critical darling, then vocal runs danced beautifully around after eight years between albums and Brown Band; the Michael Jackson ing, wearing what appeared to be Beyoncé wins with “Halo.” So how Bocelli’s operatic belting. And with did a spectacular rendition of his tribute; Bon Jovi; Mary J. Blige and a gimp hood); Academy president did this happen? Beats me. Maybe images of earthquake-ravaged Haiti bittersweet “Pretty Wings.” Beyoncé Andrea Bocelli; the Lil Wayne/ Neil Portnow and his once-a-year Taylor, Gaga, and Beyoncé shared displayed in the background, the nailed her hit “If I Were a Boy” and Eminem/Travis Barker performance “stop stealing music” speech (Can the votes of people wanting a female ultimate song about friendship and even showed some of her rock vo- (which could have been even better we please put an end to this horribly mainstream soloist to win while the supporting your fellow man likely left cal chops with a scorching version if not for CBS being heavy-handed awkward ritual? The Grammys are rock fans in the Academy held firm few eyes dry. Crazy Heart is an Emotional Exorcism, but in a Good Way...

By Br i a n By r n e LL.M. ’10 ter and resentful. After entangling However, in this movie, she is phe- gree. Although a minor role in terms little slow. In addition, the casting St a f f Wr i t e r himself with a journalist (Maggie nomenal. She deserves her Oscar of screen time, his character is signifi- choice of Blake’s former-protégé Gyllenhaal) and her four-year-old nomination wholeheartedly, and I cant as Blake’s only real friend. Duvall rival is questionable. As the actor As the credits roll on Crazy son, Blake’s self-destructive tenden- stand perplexed as to why she was captures a restrained tenderness, has been deliberately left off the Heart, you will probably feel cies come sharply into focus against overlooked by the other awarding which operates as a heartwarming credits to enhance the surprise emotionally exhausted. Sitting in a backdrop of domesticity. bodies. Any actress set to play the support structure for Blake. Duvall effect (much like Kevin Spacey the darkness with the title track Believe the whirlwind of media clichéd role of “protective single produced the movie, and has clearly in Se7en), I will not disclose his reverberating through the empty- hype engulfing Bridges, for his per- mom” should mandatorily study made many fine decisions along the identity here. Suffice to say, not- ing theater, you may find that you formance is sheer class. He offers a Gyllenhaal’s performance to see way. Casting himself in this role is withstanding his excellent singing are still being swept away by the masterful portrayal that is convinc- how it’s done. When required, she among his finest. He understands the and a solid performance, he is movie’s affective undercurrents. ing, subtle and distressing. Bridges unleashes a maternal ferocity that importance of his character, and this not in the same league as the rest Crazy Heart has the capacity to lays himself bare, time and again is fresh, real and powerful. At other elevates Crazy Heart from excellent of the cast. These criticisms are, suck you into its troubled world, throughout the film, with scenes points in the movie, she is perfectly to superb. however, merely a minor blem- harvest your sentimentality, and so raw they could be employed in understated and serves to illuminate On that note of elevation, I ish on an otherwise outstanding spit you out onto a cold New an anti-alcoholism campaign. He our tragic protagonist. Fundamen- must praise the soundtrack, which film. York street. But have no fear, for presents a character that has striking is instantly accessible and addic- I recommend this movie to this is not a negative experience. flaws, but also a warmth that shields tively pleasing. Quality arrives in three distinct audiences: First, if Rather, it may be described as him from audience condemnation. two portions. First, Bridges is an quality and class rate highly on poignant exhilaration, or, even, an He is sleazy and a failure in many impressive singer. Second, the your critical palette, then Crazy emotional exorcism. Embrace the respects, yet viewers are left with songs themselves are not only Heart is worthy of your patronage. drama, and you will be rewarded no choice but to invest heavily in “toe-tappingly” enjoyable, but Second, if you’re a Big Lebowski with a cleansed feeling. his redemption. During his career, also achieve originality without fan, and believe that Jeff Bridges Bridges plays a washed-up, Bridges has already notched up sacrificing authenticity. The only has been inseparably forged to alcoholic, country music singer four Oscar nominations, but no disappointment is that the music “The Dude” for perpetuity, then named Bad Blake, who is re- wins. Unquestionably, he is finally appears sparingly. This movie this movie waits patiently to duced to playing dismal venues deserving of the top honor. is a drama first, and a musical broaden your horizons. Third, if for poor money. Blake leads a With Bridges on the best form tally, Gyllenhaal is a success, because picture second. you long to have cowboy hats be- solitary existence, driving long of his career, it was crucial to place she never deviates from her primary Although comprised of the come socially acceptable at NYU, distances cross-country and fre- a talented actress in his frame. Evi- mandate, namely, to match the talent numerable strengths discussed so far, hide a hip flask in your sock, and quenting dive motels. Worse still, dently, this concern was given due of Bridges. Crazy Heart has the potential to disap- set your iPod to play Hank Wil- his former protégé has taken the weight, with the casting of Gyllen- Supplementing the flawlessness point. It is important to emphasize liams infinitely on repeat, then country music scene by storm, haal. Admittedly, I have never been of Bridges and Gyllenhaal is Robert that this is not Walk The Line. Some grab your chewing tobacco and leaving Blake somewhat bit- a fan of either Gyllenhaal sibling. Duvall: an actor of stature and pedi- viewers may find the progress a go watch Crazy Heart.