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2 REFRESHED | October 2015 contents
FEATURES
6 Stopping the pain 6 Domestic violence victiim is silent no more 12 Shedding your freak From control to confi dence 14 Loving the foreigner Seeing refugees through God’s eyes 19 Fall fun San Diego
COLUMNS 14 5 Dean Nelson | in plain sight Big lesson in serving small 23 Mark Larson | on the mark Embrace the inner boomer — or not 24 Jon Huckins | perspective To my four kids, from Dad 25 Daniel Jenkins | reality check Living in the moment 27 26 Janice Thompson | on the money Practically speaking… Pulling the trigger on retirement 27 Michael Foust | purposeful parenting 3 things to tell your kids about ‘scary monsters’ 28 Nate Landis | inspired living Finding rest in the rush 30 Joanne Brokaw | that’s life! Confessions of an offi ce supply addict
DEPARTMENTS 16 Community news 24 20 Tunes 22 Outtakes
23 26
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The tree of knowledge begins with literacy Literacy First Charter Schools
VOLUME 2 | NUMBER 10 PUBLISHERS Lamar & Theresa Keener NEW FREEDOM ACADEMY EDITOR Lori Arnold THIS FALL Independent Study Program PROOFREADER Lis Trouten for Grades K-5 COVER PHOTO Sarah Tolson Photography s Individualized Academic Program (IAP) AD SALES Lamar Keener s Curriculum and resources provided CONTRIBUTORS Joanne Brokaw, Michael Foust, Jon Huckins, Daniel Jenkins, Mark Larson, Carol LeBeau, s Report attendance, turn in projects, Dean Nelson, Janice Thompson track progress online ADVISORY BOARD Mark Rasche, Nelson Keener, s Progress folders & quarterly Carl Schreiber, Brandon Ruby portfolios Copyright © 2015 Selah Media Group s Resource lab for help with lessons, planning, mentoring, Refreshed is an in de pen dent, faith-based magazine pub lished monthly by Selah Media Group. It is distributed mini-classes in bulk, free of charge, to hundreds of locations s Standards-based report cards throughout San Diego County. For a 1-year mail subscription, send $24.95 to the address ■ Every Freedom family will take ownership of their learning experience below or visit refreshedmag.com. ■ Every Freedom student will be prepared to be an innovative leader Refreshed welcomes story ideas. All unsolicited material is ■ Every Freedom student will be prepared to be a life-long learner subject to approval of the publishers and is not returned. Viewpoints expressed in Refreshed are those of their Call (619) 579-7233 for enrollment information respective writers, and are not necessarily held by the publishers. Brought to you by Literacy First Charter Schools Reasonable effort is made to screen advertisers, but no Learn more at www.lfcsinc.org endorsement of the publishers is implied or should be inferred. The publishers can accept no responsibility for the products or services offered through ad ver tise ments. The publisher reserves the right to refuse any ad ver tis ing. Literacy First School locations ADDRESS ALL CORRESPONDENCE TO: Primary Academy (K-3) Liberty Academy (K-6) Junior Academy (4-8) Liberty Charter High P. O. Box 2606, El Cajon, CA 92021 799 E. Washington Ave. 698 W. Main St. 1012 E. Bradley Ave. School (9-12) E-MAIL [email protected] El Cajon, CA 92020 El Cajon, CA 92020 El Cajon, CA 92021 8425 Palm St. (619) 579-7232 (619) 579-7233 (619) 596-5665 Lemon Grove, CA 91945 PHONE/FAX (619) 567-7811 (619) 668-2131 AD SALES (619) 567-7811
4 REFRESHED | October 2015 in plain sight
DEAN NELSON
Big lesson in serving small
A stethoscope can put a swagger in lar room fi lled with emaciated anyone’s walk. I don’t know if all doc- women whose vacant eyes stared, tors feel important when they have one unseeing. But again they passed around their necks, but I know that through that room without stop- some do. ping. My friend Gary had his around his “Could there be a needier neck several years ago when he reported place than this?” he wondered, for duty at a facility run by Mother Tere- his mind reviewing the more sa and the Sisters of Charity in Kolkata serious diseases he might en- (formerly Calcutta), India. counter. He arrived at her place early one They entered a primitive morning and asked where he could be kitchen where a simple lunch of the most useful to her that day. He was rice was being prepared over an wearing a nice shirt, nice slacks, a sport open fi re. coat, and his stethoscope. She told him “Of course,” he thought. he was needed at a nearby building “They’re going to serve me lunch called the House of the Dying Desti- fi rst.” PHOTO BY BRITTANY KEENER SIEBRAND KEENER BRITTANY BY PHOTO tutes. This is where people go to die But they walked through the Home for the Dying Destitutes, a hospice for the sick, when they have no one to care for them. kitchen, out the back door, and destitute and the dying, established by Mother Teresa in Most of the people there were dying of into the narrow alley. Sister Kalighat, Kolkata, India. treatable diseases, but they didn’t have Priscilla pointed to a very large access to proper care. pile of garbage. The smell was gag- wasted. Armed with his medical knowledge, inducing. Just as he was about to say good bye maybe he would even be able to put this “We need you to take this garbage to Sister Priscilla, he saw a hand-let- place out of business, he thought. down the street to the dump,” she said, tered sign above the door, with Mother “Soon this place will have a new sign handing him two buckets and a shovel. Teresa’s words: “We can do no great that will say ‘The House of Hope for the “The dump is several blocks down the things, only small things with great Living’ instead of ‘The House of the Dy- street on the right. You can’t miss it.” love.” ing Destitutes,’” he told me. With a nod and a slight smile she was Gary said his heart melted when he He knew he was going to make a dif- gone. saw that sign. All of his degrees, his cer- ference. His mind began to review his Recovering from a momentary tainty, his credentials, his stethoscope, medical training. This was a place that stunned silence, Gary began to wonder maybe even his arrogance, didn’t mat- needed him. what was happening. Didn’t they get the ter. He introduced himself to Sister Pris- fact that he was a doctor? “Mother Teresa and Sister Priscilla cilla, who was in charge of the house. He put his stethoscope in his pocket pierced the armor I worked so long to “Follow me, please,” she said in her and attacked the pile. He fi lled the construct,” he told me. “Serving others soft, British accent. buckets and headed down the street. He is about attitude and availability to do He put his stethoscope around his slung the contents onto the dump and whatever is needed—with love.” neck and they entered the men’s ward— went back for the next load. By mid- a large, open room with rows of cots afternoon he was fi nished. He set down Dean Nelson directs the cradling what could only be described as the buckets and shovel and headed journalism program at skeletons with skin on them. Some were back through the kitchen, the women’s Point Loma Nazarene tossing in pain, too weak to fi ght their ward, the men’s ward—places where he University in San Diego. affl ictions or even to eat. thought his gifts could have been bet- His book about seeing To Gary’s surprise, they proceeded ter used. He was drenched, and smelled God in everyday life is quickly through that ward and on to the much like the garbage heap. He was a “God Hides in Plain Sight: next—the women’s ward. It was a simi- little bothered that his talents had been How to See the Sacred in a Chaotic World.”
October 2015 | REFRESHED 5 STOPPING THE PAIN
Domestic violence victim is silent no more story by LORI ARNOLD photos by SARAH TOLSON
essica Yaffa was fi nally turning her money for her. life around. She had left a years-long “When I arrived and he opened the Jabusive relationship after her former door I could immediately smell alcohol on husband, Trent*, punched their son in the his breath,” Yaffa said. “This was the fi rst face while she held the young child in her indicator there could be a problem. I also arms. She had a new job, visiting clients in learned that no one else was home, which the fi eld. It offered security and freedom was a second red fl ag.” from a desk. And, after not receiving child There was small talk as he joked with support from her ex, she was pleasantly her about her new job. surprised when he called to tell her he had “Then he grabbed me in a bear hug
*Name changed
6 REFRESHED | October 2015 and wouldn’t let go,” she said. “As I tried to pull away he squeezed about two years into their relationship. harder. He then threw me on the ground, pinned my arms and legs.” “I did a very good job of keeping my family in the dark because The attack escalated and Yaffa was raped and sodomized. I knew if they found out what was happening they would forbid me “As I screamed for help he said, ‘Don’t make me hurt you,’ which to be with him,” Yaffa said. “Early on, my parents were afraid to I knew he was capable of, so my screams turned to tears and beg- push too hard because they feared I’d run off with him completely ging him to stop. When he fi nished he insisted I wanted ‘it’ too, if they did.” that it was consensual. I didn’t argue. I just wanted out of there.” Later, as Yaffa entered young adulthood, her widowed mother Though “disheveled and a mess,” with scratches on her arms was focused on her own issues, trying to stay afl oat as she raised and legs, Yaffa kept her appointment with the client then picked Yaffa’s younger brother as a single mom. up her son and dropped him with a neighbor. She then drove to the “I’m not sure what they could local police station. By then, black bruises had developed along her have done differently,” she inner thighs. said. “I was so lost.” “They transported me for a physical exam after what felt like The isolation con- hours of questioning” she said. “The district attorney picked up the tinued at college as case quickly and I spent the next few months being victimized all her friends began over again by the defense.” distancing them- Although the immediate threat diminished after her ex was selves as they convicted and sentenced to 29 years, the repercussions remained. witnessed signs of “ I felt dirty, used, trashy, and afraid. I began sleeping with any abuse. man that would have me, just to feel like I was seen, pretty, desired, “I did have or needed.” one longtime After each encounter, Yaffa only felt worse about herself and best friend her life. who was also The experience tapped into childhood insecurities that annihi- in an abusive lated her sense of worth, making her easy prey for a domestic thug. relation- “I was always hyper-sensitive to my appearance and felt unat- ship, and tractive from a very young age,” she said, adding that she also felt therefore disconnected from her father, who was a stickler when it came to we were academics. “I didn’t get great grades, nor was I interested in politics or global events,” Yaffa said. “As my brother came along, he was the exact opposite of me. I watched my dad grow in affection towards him and longed for the connection they had.”
• • •
When Jessica met Trent in her high school English class she was smitten with the attention. “His possessive behavior, extreme jealousy, accusations, his need to be included in all of my social activities, and desire to know where I was at all times were interpreted as ‘love’ and felt really good to a then-16-year-old girl with low self-esteem,” she said. Over time she began self-protecting by avoiding situ- ations that could result in confrontations. “Anytime I wanted to go anywhere it became a huge fi ght full of accusations, and therefore it was usu- ally easier to just cancel,” she said, adding that she avoided “social gatherings where other men would be because I knew this would cause a blow-up.” The verbal and emotional abuse turned physical
8 REFRESHED | October 2015 “During abusive episodes my son would cry for me, and (my husband) would physically prohibit me from comforting him.”
of no help to one another,” she said. DOMESTIC VIOLENCE BY THE NUMBERS The intensity only magnifi ed after the birth of her child. “During abusive episodes my son would cry for me, and he October is national Domestic Violence Awareness would physically prohibit me from comforting him,” Yaffa said. “I Month, a campaign that evolved from the National Coali- was watched through the blinds when doing laundry, had cameras tion Against Domestic Violence’s “Day of Unity,” fi rst held in the apartment, and was followed to the grocery store.” in October 1981. Despite the chaos in her home, Yaffa said she focused on trying Domestic violence numbers are staggering: to be the “only stable force in my young child’s life.” • Every 9 seconds in the US, a woman is assaulted or “I feared that I would die, and at times I wanted to,” she said. beaten. “My greatest fear was that he’d kill me and leave my son to be raised in an abusive environment.” • On average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically The transformational moment came when Trent hit her son abused by an intimate partner in the United States. during a heated confrontation. During one year, this equates to more than 10 million “Although it took me a while to make preparations to leave, it women and men. was in that moment that I knew I had to,” she said. • 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have been victims of (some form of) physical violence by an intimate partner within • • • their lifetime. • 1 in 5 women and 1 in 7 men have been victims of Yaffa met Jesus in 2007 when she began dating the man who is severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their now her husband. lifetime. “He had been pursuing me for months, and I fi nally gave in,” she said. “Once we got together he asked if I’d come to church • 1 in 7 women and 1 in 18 men have been stalked by with him. Once I stepped foot into church I never looked back.” an intimate partner during their lifetime to the point Several weeks after visiting church with her boyfriend, Yaffa in which they felt very fearful or believed that they or attended a women’s ministry event where she received a promise. someone close to them would be harmed or killed. “God spoke to me on this particular night about using all I had • On a typical day, there are more than 20,000 phone calls endured for good,” she said, though she admits she had no idea placed to domestic violence hotlines nationwide. what that would entail. • The presence of a gun in a domestic violence situation Four months later she launched HEALING (Honoring, Empow- increases the risk of homicide by 500 percent. ering, and Loving Individuals Needing Guidance), a domestic vio- lence ministry at Rock Church. It’s believed to be the fi rst min- • Intimate partner violence accounts for 15 percent of all istry of its kind in San Diego County. Since then, the ministry violent crime. has served close to 10,000 people. • Women between the ages of 18-24 are most commonly She also wrote “Mine Until: My Journey Into and Out abused by an intimate partner. of the Arms of an Abuser,” a no-holds-barred account of • 19 percent of domestic violence incidents involve a her experiences. She also created a workbook for ther- weapon. apists called “Help Me, Help Her: A Therapists Guide to Treating Victims of Domestic Violence.” • Domestic victimization is correlated with a higher rate As demand for her voice grew, Yaffa, 40, launched of depression and suicidal behavior. No Silence No Violence, a national non-profi t that • Only 34 percent of people who are injured by intimate provides resources and aid to victims of domestic partners receive medical care for their injuries. violence and sexual assault. The non-profi t also • 1 in 5 women and 1 in 71 men in the United States have works to change perceptions of domestic violence been raped in their lifetime. in an effort to change culture. “We actually have a Bible Study that talks • Almost half of female (46.7 percent) and male (44.9 about God’s view on domestic violence,” she said. percent) victims of rape in the United States were raped “We use Bible stories, verses, and other Christian by an acquaintance. Of these, 45.4 percent of female materials to help women move past feelings of rape victims and 29 percent of male rape victims were guilt and shame and into a place of peace and sur- raped by an intimate partner. render.” Source: www.ncadv.org/learn/statistics She has also partnered with Practical Re-
October 2015 | REFRESHED 9 covery to open a treatment center for women who are misusing alcohol, illicit drugs or prescription drugs to self-medicate as a way to cope with the traumatic stress of toxic, abusive or violent relationships. Yaffa, who has a degree in sociology and works as the director of admissions and community education for a substance abuse treatment facility, said she is committed to tackling the issues that make women—and men—vulnerable to abuse. Although the majority of her clients are women, Yaffa said they do refer male clients to Christian therapists trained in handling their unique issues. “Unfortunately, the stigma that already exists around domestic violence is worsened when a man comes forward,” she said. “Men are ashamed to report, seek help and admit they have no control over what is happening. We work to eliminate that shame, while
A story of hope In the seven-plus years since Jessica Yaffa launched her fi rst ministry, HEALING (Honoring, Empowering, and Loving Individuals Needing Guidance), more than 10,000 people have been assisted. Though each story is unique, their narratives all speak powerfully to God’s mercy and grace on the redemption road. In one instance, Yaffa and her team were able to assist an unchurched pregnant woman with three children, two of whom had been removed from her custody because of domestic violence. She found Yaffa while bouncing be- tween shelters with her 2-year-old. “When she showed up she had one pair of torn san- dals and her daughter had one outfi t,” Yaffa said. “She was struggling to feed the two of them and had developed preg- nancy complications. When she came to our fi rst support group she was hopeless and alone. We provided her with a sense of unconditional love and acceptance,” Yaffa said. They also clothed them, provided them with food, and began to gather baby supplies for the soon-to-be-newborn. Yaffa connected the woman to the church’s Adopt-a- Family program for Christmas. There were gifts for all four of the children, along with practical household items. And when the baby arrived early, a volunteer showed up at the hospital with a car seat so Mom could take her newborn home. “Since then, this woman has gotten her two older chil- dren back,” the ministry director said. “We helped her get into her own apartment. She is now working and going to school. She volunteers with our ministry and gives her time and treasure to other women in need.”
10 REFRESHED | October 2015 “God has always been there. I could have died 100 times over and he protected me in those moments. Because of this I can step out of bondage and not fear the future.”
empowering them with resources, guidance and support in the “No matter how stuck you may feel, God provides the re- same way we do our women.” sources we need in order to walk according to His will,” she said. Regardless of her clients’ gender, Yaffa said the vision of her “There is hope.” ministry is to “speak worth and value into every person that God al- lows us to step in front of so that they may know where their worth • • • comes from and where it doesn’t. When we believe we are worthy because He says so, we don’t need to look for that validation from Although other congregations have begun similar ministries, another human being, nor do we need to control them.” Yaffa said many churches are still reluctant to address the issue It is a lesson that Yaffa personally learned after deciding she of domestic violence. Some Christian bookstores have declined to didn’t want to walk the path alone anymore. carry her memoir and even when she’s been invited to speak she’s “God has always been there,” she said. “I could have died 100 been asked more than once to “tone it down.” Yaffa said she be- times over and he protected me in those moments. Because of this lieves silence is an unnecessary enabler. I can step out of bondage and not fear the future.” “Survivors often say, ‘I had no idea there were others out there,’ That future includes her ex-husband’s scheduled release from ‘I’m not alone or crazy,’ ‘If she can do this, I can do this,’” she said. prison in 2025. But the thought of that doesn’t fi ll Yaffa with fore- “All of those moments make this worth doing.” boding. Yaffa said that churches are in a unique position to not only ad- “I choose not to live in bondage or fear. God has, and will con- dress the dark side of domestic violence, but to wipe it out with the tinue to be, my protector,” Yaffa said. “I am strong, resilient, coura- light of the gospel, the one true prescription for redemption. geous, and anointed. Where I was full of shame, I now walk free. I “What we don’t talk about we don’t have to address,” she said. didn’t want anyone to know my ‘secret,’ yet today my testimony is “This happens to Christians. (Let’s) talk about it, have resources my greatest gift.” available, and be sure you have church council that understands It’s a gift she gratefully passes on to others by reminding them the delicate nature of abuse within Christian households. they are not alone, either. “It is when we can move out of the darkest places and into light “It’s OK to be sad, angry, lonely, confused, and afraid,” she said. that He is truly glorifi ed. So many of us are dealing with, or have “I have learned to acknowledge where I am and be kind to myself in dealt with, abuse at some level. We need to create safe spaces to those moments, rather than trying to escape them.” talk about it without judgment or fear of shaming. We fi ght against The key, Yaffa said, is not staying in the pit. that enough on our own.” ■
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE RESOURCES
PROGRAMS AND RESOURCES SHELTERS No Silence No Violence — (858) 413-6063, www.nosilencenoviolence.org Big Sister League — (619) 297-1172, www.bigsisterleague.org Break the Silence against Domestic Violence — (855) 287-1777, San Diego Rescue Mission — (619) 687-3720, www.sdrescue.org www.breakthesilencedv.org YWCA of San Diego County — (619) 239-0355, www.ywcasandiego.org San Diego Family Justice Center — (866) 933-4673, www.sandiegofjc.org THE CHURCH AND DOMESTIC VIOLENCE Center For Community Solutions — (858) 272-5777, www.ccssd.org www.kprz.com/11596483/ www.lifewayresearch.com/2014/06/27/pastors-seldom-preach- COUNSELING about-domestic-violence Christian Women’s Counseling International — (619) 920-9977, www.focusministries1.org/pastorstools.asp www.christianwomenscounseling.com Care Counseling at Rock Church — (619) 226-7625, EMERGENCY HELP www.sdrock.com/ministries/domesticviolence/carecounseling San Diego Domestic Violence Council — 1-888-385-4657, www.sddvc.org National Domestic Violence Hotline — 1-800-799-SAFE (7233), LOCAL CHURCH MINISTRIES www.thehotline.org HEALING at Rock Church — (619) 226-7625, National Sexual Assault Hotline — 1-800-656-HOPE (4673), www.sdrock.com/ministries/domesticviolence www.rainn.org FOCIS at New Harvest San Diego — (619) 326-8450, www. Stalking Strike Force — (619) 515-8900, www.sdcda.org newharvesteastsandiego.org Battered Women’s Services — (619) 234-3164, www.wrcsd.org Journey Community Church DV Support Group — (619) 464-4544, National Organization for Victim Assistance — 1-800-879-6682, www.journeycommunitychurch.com/careministries/caregroups www.trynova.org
October 2015 | REFRESHED 11 Shedding your E K From control to confi dence F A by LORI ARNOLD R
hile preparing the devotion for our church’s re- was face to face with the realization that my tendency cent Rejuvenate worship night gathering, I was to be a control freak had surpassed mundane household Wthinking about the concept of rejuvenating and operations to also usurp God’s divine power for every what it really means. inch of my redeemed life. We go about it in different ways. For some it is hik- This revelation—this reality—explains why I’ve been ing, for others it’s curling up with a good book or, per- tethered to a pattern of fi ts and starts, where I am ral- haps, massages, pedicures, vacations. lied and motivated by great preaching, worship and di- In our spiritual lives it can look a lot like a worship vine insights from many of my church peeps, only to be night in which Jesus is celebrated with songs and can- stymied in the follow-through. dles. At home it could be hitting our Bibles, reading our It’s like putting cheap gas in a Maserati. favorite Christian author, connecting with a spiritual It also occurred to me that the battle with control mentor. Although our approaches vary, there is a com- also inhibits the confi dence that God promises to his mon denominator: We cast off something in order to en- people. Until we can truly relinquish control, we will ter into a place of refreshing. We empty out something never be able to walk in the radiant confi dence dis- in order to make room for something new and fresh. played by Paul in Philippians 3:10-14 (NIV): Since our pastor returned from a month-long sab- batical earlier this summer, he has been sharing from “I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of the pulpit insights he gleaned from his days of wrestling his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, with God. One of those was the realization that he was becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, at- operating out of his own power; not relying enough on taining to the resurrection from the dead. the One True Power. He also warned us that where the “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have leader goes, so goes the body. already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold This is where my devotional becomes part confes- of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers sional: My personal reality is that I, too, had been in the and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken midst of my own wrestling match. It came during a re- hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind cent bout with pneumonia in what became one of those and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward dark nights of the soul. For days I had been hearing in- the goal to win the prize for which God has called me cessant phones ringing in my ear, a couple seconds on, a heavenward in Christ Jesus.” couple seconds off, non-stop. I was coughing, struggling for a clear breath. I had also been notifi ed by one of my But how do we move from our false, self-centered clients that my hours were likely to be cut—again. starts to a consistent confi dence? This particular night, while physically miserable and Blogger Nathan W. Bingham, who is director of Digi- coping with the phantom phone ringing. I wrestled until tal Outreach for Ligonier Ministries, offers his insights 5 a.m. with fi ts of how we could possibly “control” the through his post “3 Ways to Crush Your Inner Control loss of income, while the enemy began pinging me with Freak.” echoes of “you will never be good enough,” “you’ve failed again,” “you will never get ahead,” “how much do Remember the gospel you think you can endure? and “with this track record, He tells us the fi rst step is to remember the gospel. who would want to hear your voice?” He says, “Remember, the bad news of the ‘gospel’ is Lies, all of them, straight from hell. that you cannot save yourself. You are guilty before a But in the wee hours of the morning, one truth did holy God and are without hope within yourself. Redemp- emerge: I too had been operating on my own power. I tion is totally outside of your control. However, the good
12 REFRESHED | October 2015 you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat The promises of Isaiah’s from?’” (NIV) Invitation to the Thirsty Bingham writes, “His instinct was to cover himself when he should have called out to the only One who “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, could cover him: God.” neither are your ways my ways,” This passage reminds me of another biblical example declares the Lord. of control interfering with our spiritual walk. We saw it with the Israelites after God told them he would provide “As the heavens are higher than the earth, their needs during their exodus by raining down manna so are my ways higher than your ways from heaven. The fi rst time it fell, Genesis 16:18-20 tells and my thoughts than your thoughts. us: As the rain and the snow “Everyone had gathered just as much as they needed. come down from heaven, “ Then Moses said to them, ‘No one is to keep any of it and do not return to it until morning.’ without watering the earth “However, some of them paid no attention to Moses; and making it bud and fl ourish, they kept part of it until morning, but it was full of maggots so that it yields seed for the sower and began to smell.” (NIV) and bread for the eater, So is my word that goes out from my mouth: Return to prayer It will not return to me empty, Bingham’s second step to crush our inner control but will accomplish what I desire freak is to return to prayer. He writes, “If you don’t pray often, or at all, have you and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. considered it may be because you don’t think you need You will go out in joy to pray? In your mind you’ve got things under control. and be led forth in peace; Your intellect, charisma, wealth, or whatever, will get the mountains and hills you through the day. The act of stopping to pray is an will burst into song before you, external, physical, symbolic, yet real expression that and all the trees of the fi eld you don’t have everything under control. Prayer is you will clap their hands. saying, ‘I’m not a control freak! God, please sustain me Instead of the thornbush will grow the juniper, today in Your grace.’ and instead of briers the myrtle will grow. “Sometimes, one of the greatest blessings from trials This will be for the Lord’s renown, and suffering is that it forces you to see your helpless- for an everlasting sign, ness and it moves you to a deeper season of prayer.” that will endure forever.” Isaiah 55:8-13 (NIV) Rest in God’s sovereignty The blogger’s third step to crush our inner control freak is to rest in God’s sovereignty. Bingham writes “When your energy (obsession) is to focus on control- news of the gospel is that another, God Himself, has tak- ling things, it’s a subtle attempt to be god. You might en control of redeeming a people for His glory. God is the not be trying to control the universe, but you want to One who is active in sending His Son to redeem a people. be the god of your own life, or the god of your offi ce, Jesus is the One active in the sense of willingly living, dy- or the god of your current major project. It can be a ing, and rising to redeem a people. The Holy Spirit is the fi ne line sometimes, but there is a difference between One active, like the wind which ‘blows where it wishes’ subtly usurping the place of God, and ruling, managing, (John 3:8), drawing a people to the Father.” leading, serving, under God in the area in which He has The blogger then goes on to say that we inherited placed you.” this control mechanism from the Bible’s fi rst control As I work to better implement these three steps in freak, Adam, who, once realizing that he was naked after my own life, it occurs to me that I am probably not the eating the forbidden fruit, sewed fi g leaves together to only believer who is caught in this tension between con- cover himself and then hid from God. trol and confi dence. Genesis 3:8-11 tells us: Would you care to join me on this journey toward “Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord true freedom? ■ God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the gar- Lori Arnold is editor of Refreshed magazine. If you would den. But the Lord God called to the man, ‘Where are you?’ like to share your thoughts on control and confi dence, send “He answered, ‘I heard you in the garden, and I was an email to [email protected]. To see Bingham’s entire afraid because I was naked; so I hid.’ post, “3 Ways to Crush Your Inner Control Freak,” visit www. “ And he said, ‘Who told you that you were naked? Have nwbingham.com.
October 2015 | REFRESHED 13 PHOTO BY JEDEDIAH SMITH JEDEDIAH BY PHOTO Due to a war that has stripped millions of Syrians of work and most of their possessions, many families are living in the Zaatari refugee camp in Jordan. Lovingtheforeigner Seeing refugees through God’s eyes by ERIC METAXAS
n September 9th, Jean-Claude four million of them have fl ed to neigh- there are other considerations: the Juncker, president of the Europe- boring Lebanon, Jordan, and especially, economic, political, cultural, and yes, Oan Commission, urged European Turkey. The sheer numbers—one in religious impact of the refugees on the Union members to distribute 160,000 every fi ve people in Lebanon is a Syrian counties that will host them. migrants among member nations. refugee—have overwhelmed these coun- There are already signs that the in- The unfolding humanitarian catas- tries’ capacity to respond. fl ux of Syrian refugees, who are mostly trophe, which has resulted in at least And now they’re attempting to reach Sunni Muslims, has destabilized Leba- 2500 deaths by drowning, is largely be- Europe, increasingly via Turkey. More non’s already-fragile sectarian balance. ing driven by people seeking to escape than 30 thousand Syrians are applying And it’s an understatement to say that the civil war and the rise of ISIS in Iraq for asylum every month and the number European countries have struggled and Syria. shows no sign of ebbing. when it comes to assimilating previous Words can scarcely do justice to the That’s a brief summary of the num- generations of Muslim immigrants. scale of the crisis. An estimated 11 mil- bers. The question is: what do we do But none of this excuses indifference lion people, more than half of Syria’s about it? The honest answer is: I don’t or inaction, especially for Christians. population, have been displaced. While know, not with any certainty. In addition After all, the Scriptures make it clear most have remained within Syria, nearly to the sheer magnitude of the problem, that God cares a great deal about how
14 REFRESHED | October 2015 After all, the Scriptures make it clear that God cares a great deal about how his people treat the foreigners in their midst.
his people treat the foreigners in their common: they were all foreigners. But Christians should not allow these midst. Leviticus 19 tells us “The foreign- Then there’s Matthew 25. The word concerns to become an excuse for a re- er residing among you must be treated translated “stranger” in the passage “I sponse that amounts to “yeah, it stinks as your native-born. Love them as your- was a stranger and you welcomed me” to be you.” self, for you were foreigners in Egypt. I is xenos, the Greek word for “foreigner.” We should oppose appeals to fear am the Lord your God.” What’s more, the Greek word translated and dehumanizing rhetoric. We may not Ezekiel 47 says that the foreigner “welcomed,” sunago, means to join or know exactly what to do about the crisis among you “shall be to you as native-born gather together, as well as to receive but we do know how to talk about the children of Israel. With you they shall be into one’s home. It’s the same word people caught up in it. And in an age allotted an inheritance among the tribes from which we get “synagogue.” of careless and often callous rhetoric, of Israel. In whatever tribe the sojourner But it was Jesus who went beyond Le- that’s a start. ■ resides, there you shall assign him his in- viticus’ command to treat the stranger heritance, declares the Lord God.” as one of our own, and instead, com- Eric Metaxas is the As if to underscore the importance manded us to treat them as we would voice of Breakpoint, a of these commands, the New Testament treat Him. radio commentary. © opens with the genealogy of Jesus, which As I said earlier, I’m not certain as 2015 Prison Fellowship lists 42 men and fi ve women. Besides to what the specifi c policy response to Ministries. Reprinted with Mary, the women listed—Tamar, Rahab, this crisis should be. There are legiti- permission. Ruth, and Bathsheba—have one thing in mate economic and security concerns.
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October 2015 | REFRESHED 15 Bob Beckel, left, and Cal community news Thomas, right, will square off in a dialogue on politics and faith on Oct. 11 at Skyline Church.
Pancake breakfast to Saturday to 7 a.m. Sunday, will be held their “Common Ground” weekly column rain or shine since, organizers said, in USA Today. Despite their different po- support pregnancy clinic the homeless must endure all types of litical perspectives, the two men are ex- PARADISE HILLS — Puritan Evangeli- weather conditions. amples of how to hold a civil discourse cal Church is hosting a pancake breakfast The sleepover will include live music, and to come up with a mutually-agree- on Saturday, Oct. 17, from 8 to 11 a.m. videos on homelessness, care package able solution. Proceeds from the event will go to sup- packing stations and an art gallery. “There is precious little civil dis- port the opening of the Southeast San Di- There is a minimum $20 fee to regis- course left in present day politics,” ego Satellite Pregnancy Care Clinic. ter. Children ages 5 to 12 will be admit- said Garlow. “This year’s election likely There will be jumps and games for ted for free. The event is closed to chil- marks the greatest dishonoring name children. dren under 5. Limited scholarships are calling ever seen in a campaign. Sky- The church is located at 6374 Po- available. line Church is willing to take a risk and tomac St. in Paradise Hills. Participants can purchase food from invite guests who will demonstrate For more information, call (619) 479- local vendors. how the ‘right’ and ‘left’ can have re- 5053. Although the mission does provide spectful conversation.” overnight shelter, its purpose is to res- The free event begins at 5 p.m. Sleepless in San Diego cue homeless men, women and chil- The church is located at 11330 Campo fundraiser returns dren from the streets of San Diego and Rd. in Rancho San Diego. Learn more at www.skylinechurch. POINT LOMA — The San Diego Res- to give them the tools needed to per- org or call (619) 660-5000. cue Mission’s 9th Annual Sleepless in manently overcome the drugs, alcohol, San Diego fundraiser will be held Oct. domestic violence, and other critical 10-11 at Liberty Station. issues that led them to the streets in Jenkins to keynote Participants will sleep under the the fi rst place. stars to raise both money and aware- Each month the San Diego Rescue writers’ conference ness about homelessness in San Diego. Mission provides nearly 12,500 nights of RANCHO BERNAR- All proceeds will be used to support the shelter, more than 37,000 hot, nutritious DO — New York Times mission’s varied programs for the home- meals and more than 82,000 hours of bestselling author Jerry less, addicted and poor. Security will be education, work training, rehabilitation Jenkins is the keynote in place throughout the event. and Christian care to the residents in its speaker for the Oct. 24 The event, which runs from 4 p.m. long-term care programs. Since its 1955 San Diego Christian inception, the San Diego Rescue Mission Writers Guild Confer- has relied solely on mail solicitations ence. Agents, editors, and best-selling FALL CONCERT CALENDAR and corporate donations, not govern- authors will offer workshops and consul- Oct. 4 The Gaither Homecoming ment funds. tations. The conference, for experienced Tour, Skyline Church The event site is located at Cushing and beginning writers, is Saturday, Oct Oct. 13 Matthew West, Francesca and Dewey roads. 24, from 8 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. at Maranatha Battistelli, Rock Church To make a donation or for more infor- Chapel. Oct. 24 VeggieTales Live!, Balboa mation, visit www.sdrescue.org or www. Jenkins may be best known as the co- Theatre sleeplessinsandiego.org. author of the bestselling Left Behind se- Oct. 25 The Hoppers, El Cajon ries with Tim LaHaye. He has written 186 Wesleyan Church Thomas, Beckel to appear books, 21 of which have been New York Oct. 26 Matt Redman, Rock Church Times bestsellers. at Skyline Church Other faculty include literary agents Oct. 29 Michael W. Smith, Skyline LA MESA — Syndicated columnist Church Blythe Daniel and Tawny Johnson; Se- and Fox News contributor Cal Thomas nior Acquisitions editor for Bethany and Nov. 22 Liberty Quartet, El Cajon will appear at Skyline Church on Sun- Wesleyan Church Chosen Books, Kim Bangs; best-selling day, Oct. 11. Thomas, a noted conserva- novelist Susan Meissner; LampPost Dec. 16 Chris Tomlin, Crowder, tive journalist, will square off against his publisher Brett Burner; writing coach Adore Christmas Tour, Balboa Theatre liberal-leaning close friend and political Dr. Sandra O’Donnell; “The Organizing pundit, Bob Beckel, in an informal Q&A Pro” Marcia Ramsland and other writing Learn more about all these concerts dialogue moderated by Skyline pastor professionals. Faculty will offer private, at www.refreshedmag.com/calendar. Jim Garlow. 15-minute consultations. Thomas and Beckel are known for A book signing with Jerry Jenkins
16 REFRESHED | October 2015 community news
and chat with faculty is from 4:30 to Hors d’oeuvres and refreshments will be Conference pursues 5:15 p.m. served. The annual conference is designed The gala begins at 6 p.m. after a pre- divine inspiration to help Christian writers meet editors, event meet-and-greet with sponsors, SAN DIEGO — Bless it Assurance Min- agents, authors and fellow writers, and professional athletes and other celeb- istry will present the Divinely Inspired equip them to become more successful. rities. A live and silent auction are also Conference from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Oct. 24 Learn more at www.sandiegocwg.org planned. at Bethel Seminary. The event is hosted or call (76) 239-3269. The golfi ng portion of the benefi t be- by Release Worship Center. gins with a shotgun tournament start- Workshop topics and speakers include ing at 12:30 p.m., on Friday. The profes- “Divinely Inspired Leadership,” with Slam Diego tourney benefi ts sional athletes and celebrities will return Arthur Benjamin;-- “Divinely Inspired local foundation to golf with entrants. Lunch will be pro- to Master my Marriage,” with Mitchell SAN DIEGO — Slam Diego, a golf vided. Campbell and Donna Scott; “Divinely tournament to benefi t Hope Leadership The event, presented by Thrivent Fi- Inspired to Succeed in my Singleness,” Foundation will be held Oct. 29 and 30 at nancial, closes out with a post-tourna- with Summer Fuller; and “Divinely In- the Fairmont Grand Del Mar Resort and ment mixer and silent auction. spired,” with Theola Campbell. Golf Club. The foundation serves children from The event worship leader is Laneé The two-part event begins with a kindergarten to college by offering men- Battle Johnson. kick-off gala featuring The Katinas. The torships in educational support, sports The seminary is located at 6116 Arosa Thursday evening program includes opportunities and spiritual develop- St. testimonies by students who have ben- ment. For more information, call (619) 818- efi ted from the work of the foundation. Learn more at www.slamdiego.com. 7138 or send an email to [email protected].
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October 2015 | REFRESHED 17 community news
Craft fair seeks vendors Pierce’s inspiring story, “Laughing in the Dark,” SAN DIEGO — The women’s ministry during a one-night the- department at Mission Valley Christian atrical release at three Fellowship is seeking vendors for its area movie theaters. Nov. 14 Craft and Collectibles Faire. herd, Monica Crowley, Corbin Bernsen Presented by Fathom Events and Fu- The event, set for 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., is and Duck Dynasty’s Miss Kay Robertson seic Entertainment, the theater event a fundraiser to provide scholarships for as they discuss what they found inspira- will be shown at 7 p.m. Oct. 27 at the its women’s retreat. Food will also avail- tional in Chonda’s story. Audience mem- AMC La Jolla 12, Mission Valley 20, and able for purchase, with proceeds from bers also have the opportunity to send in Mira Mesa 18. Nationwide, the event will that going to support the congregation’s questions for Chonda to answer. be shown in nearly 480 movie theaters home school sports teams. Tickets are $12.50 and can be pur- through Fathom’s Digital Broadcast Net- A 10-by-10 booth space is $35. chased online or at participating theater work. The church is located at 6536 Estrella Ave. box offi ces. Online tickets are available The fi lm takes an intimate look at For more information, call Linda at at www.fathomevents.com. the life of well-known comedian Chonda (619) 683-7729 or send an email to lin- To email questions to Chonda send Pierce and how she has overcome many [email protected]. them to [email protected]. of life’s obstacles through faith and hu- mor. In addition to the docu-comedy, EVENTS ONLINE Chonda Pierce’s story there will be a post-event show, “Finding on the big screen Light in the Darkness,” where audience For more Community News and an online Calendar of Events for San Diego County, LA JOLLA — San Diegans will have members will join celebrities including please visit www.refreshedsandiego.com. an opportunity to see comedian Chonda Roma Downey, Kevin Sorbo, Sherri Shep-
SKYLINE CHURCH
Host 11330 Campo Road Guest Appearance Jim Garlow La Mesa Mark Larson Pastor, Skyline Church “The Mark Larson Show” Free Admission
18 REFRESHED | October 2015 FFallall FFunun SSanan DiegoDiego
ith children back in school, the Newbreak Church, Mira Mesa — 4 to ous games, prizes and food. The church is football season under way, de- 8:30 p.m. Oct. 30 at Hage Elementary located at 455 Church Way, El Cajon. Wciduous leavesaves starting to turn,turn, School.School. The church is papartnering with www.fhpc.org and the cool images of tan sandnd and Hage to presentpresent its FalFall Festival. The blue waters giving wayway to hueshues event will includincludee games and Redemption Church — 6 to 9 p.m. Oct. of orange, yellow andnd brown,brownn, a DDJ.J. The schoolschool is located at 31 at E.B. Scripps Elementary School. its evident that Halloweenoween isis 99750750 GalGalvinvin Ave.Ave.,, San Diego. The annual event includes games, deco- soon approaching. www.www.newbreak.org/n rated cars, jump houses, food trucks and Dozens of area churchechurchess eevents/2015/10/v live music. The school is located at 11778 are hosting alternativetive eveeventsnts Cypress Canyon Road, San Diego. to provide local communi-ommuni- NewNewbreakbreakk CChurch,hu Pacifi c www.redemptionsd.com ties with safe alternativesatives to BBeacheach — 22:30:30 tot 8 p.m. Oct. haunted celebrationsns anandd 30 at CCrownrown PPoint Elemen- Bonita Valley Community Church — sometimes-risky door-to-door-to- ttaryary SSchool.chool. The 6th an- 5:30 to 8:30 p.m. Oct. 31. In addition to door trick or treating.g. nual child-friendlychild-f event the trunk candy distribution, the event Here’s a sample of wwhat’shat’s is partpart of a partnership will include food trucks, infl atable jump going on around the countcounty.y. withwithh CrownCrow Point Jr. houses, a rock climbing wall and me- NewbreakNewbw reak is sponsor- chanical bull. The church is located at Mission Valley Christianistian FFel-el- inging thethe carnivalca games 4744 Bonita Road Bonita. lowship — Noon to 4 p.m. Oct.Occt. andand a movie in the www.bonitavalley.com 31. The Harvest Festivalestival wiwillill auditorium.audito Other include candy prizes,es, games,games, activitiesactiv include infl atables for the children,hildren, een-n- a HauntedHa Library “The People’s Choice” tertainment, food, drinksdrinks andannd andand a costume entertainment. The churchchurch iis contestconte sponsored located at 6536 Estrellarella Ave.Ave.. byby the academy. The San Diego. schoolschooh l iiss llocatedo at 4033 www.mvcf.comw.mvcf.comm IngrahamIngraham SSt.,t., San Diego. www.newbreak.org/www.n Pathways Community Church — 5 to 8 events/2015/10/ p.m. Oct. 31. The Light the Night Festival Providing excellent service includes trunk or treating, rides, infl ata- Newbreak Church, Tierrasanta — 5 to and repairs since 1989 bles and games. The church is located at 8 p.m. Oct. 30 at the church. Each host 9626 Carlton Hills Blvd., Santee. car will also provide a brief, interactive Quality | Timely Repairs www.pathways.cc activity for the children. The event will Satisfi ed Customers also feature infl atables and free food. UÊ7iÊ7ÀÊÜÌ ÊÊÃÕÀ>ViÊ «>ià LifeBridge Church — 6 to 8 p.m. Oct. 31. The church is located at 10791 Tierras- UÊ-Ì>ÌivÌ iÀÌÊ ÃÊ,i«>ÀÊ/iV }Þ Its Harvest Festival features more than anta Blvd., San Diego. UÊÀiiÊ «ÕÌiÀâi`Ê ÃÌ>Ìià 25 games, two jumpers and free food. www.newbreak.org/events/2015/10 The church is located at 7645 West Ber- nardo Drive, San Diego. Calvary Chapel La Costa Hills — 4:30 to www.lifebridgesd.org 7:30 p.m. Oct. 31. The Harvest Celebra- tion offers numerous games, a jump house, Mission Church of the Nazarene — 6 to food, a cake walk, music, raffl e prizes and, 8 p.m. Oct. 31. The Fall Festival includes of course, candy. The church is located at a trunk-or-treat, petting zoo, infl atables, 1739 Melrose Drive, Suite 102, San Marcos. Family owned and operated food, pony rides, balloon artist, photo www.calvarychapellacostahills.com by Curtis & Ann Duggan booth and giveaways. The church is lo- Duggan’s Collision Center catedSeveral at campers 4750 runMission patterns Gorge at this summer’sPlace, San Fletcher Hills Presbyterian Church — 5:30 630 Grand Ave., Spring Valley Diego.FCA football camp under the watchful eye of to 8 p.m. Oct. 31 at the church. In addition (619) 465-5655 formerwww.missionnaz.org/#!events/c17et Charger Vincent Brown. to candy-fi lled trunks, the event offers vari-
October 2015 | REFRESHED 19 tunes
Tree 63 releases long-awaited album South African rock band Tree63 emerges from its seven-year studio hia- tus on Sept. 11 with the release of its new album, Land. The project follows a series of reunion events last year in South Africa and a successful Kickstarter campaign earlier Bethel Music singer-songwriter Amanda Cook has released her debut album ‘Brave New World.’ this year. The project features “The Storm,” Bethel artist enters Cook said. “The vastness of that picture which the band Brave New World is what I want people to encounter in released as part this album. These songs are droplets, of its Kickstarter Redding, California-based Bethel Mu- and they are precious to me, because campaign. Vo- sic has released the debut album of its I’ve spent time in that water. I hope that calist and gui- artist Amanda Cook. Brave New World these water droplets invite people in. We tarist John Ellis features 13 original songs which the la- have a kind God, a merciful God, a God calls the anthem bel describes as “melodic and ethereally who doesn’t hide his heart in pieces. I an honest look rich atmosphere of worship.” want to expose the little pieces I know in at man’s need Bethel Music, affi liated with Bethel my heart to be true.” for something bigger than himself as Church, is known for its worship music the lyrics capture a man treading water and a committed community of song- Manifesting light while crying out to God after being swept writers. Manafest, whose talents as a singer, overboard. The album showcases her song, rapper, songwriter, author and skater, “My own recent experience leads me “You Make Me Brave,” which became keep him busy, has released “Shine,” his to the realization that even though we the anthemic title track to Bethel Mu- third single from his Reborn album. believe we will reach our destination sic’s Billboard Top 10-selling album re- The song features the signature rock across the hazardous sea God asks us to leased last year. The message and pro- vocals of longtime Manafest collabora- cross, it won’t be an easy voyage, and of- cess of writing, recording and leading tor and Thousand Foot Krutch front- ten we arrive shipwrecked and battered,” the song in worship, Cook said, gave man, Trevor McNevan. Like its two pre- Ellis said. “The guarantee, however, is her the opportunity to explore what it decessors, the lead single/video, “Let that we at least arrive.” is like to live in a world without anxi- You Drive,” and the albumn title track, Other songs on the album, “Ship” ety, a world absent of fear in the pres- “Shine” is available as an immediate and “Standing on It,” continue with the ence of God’s perfect love. downloads with each iTunes pre-order of stormy sea theme, creating what Ellis “If we were on a ship in the ocean, Reborn. The album was set for release on called “a kind of Jonah-like deliverance every water drop in that ocean is a tes- Oct. 2. tale.” timony of His nature and His goodness,” “Shine” is about living each day to maximum capacity and ‘beaming your light’ along the way. “My artist name, Manafest, means to CHILD CUSTODY & Support shine a light in a dark place, and when something is made manifest, it’s because Law Office of of the light,” the artist said. “I believe Patrick L. McCrary life is a gift and we owe the debt of love and to shine as bright as we can while we 35 YEARS OF FAMILY LAW EXPERIENCE have breath in our lungs. Trevor nails it Also handling… with the metaphors in the chorus: ‘Shine Divorce and Property Division in the light, glow in the dark, strike like a match on a burning heart.’ That’s what 222 W. Madison, El Cajon | (619) 589-8533 we do with our music in hopes of shining Named by the San Diego Daily Transcript as a San Diego County Top Attorney 2008 light into peoples’ lives when they’re in those dark moments.”
20 REFRESHED | October 2015 Pancake Breakfast Saturday, October 17, 8 to 11 a.m. Donations at the gate accepted to support the South East Satellite Pregnancy Care Clinic
Jumps & Games for the Kids! 6374 Potomac St. Paradise Hills, CA (619) 479-5053
Visit puritanchurch.com.
Sunday, Oct. 25 5:00 pm Doors open @ 4:00 pm VIP Seating/Meet & Greet with photo opportunities @ 3:30 pm
El Cajon Wesleyan Church 1500 East Lexington Ave. El Cajon
TICKETS: General Admission: $20 VIP Seating $30 Tickets may be purchased exclusively through Ruth Ann DeForest / East County Southern Gospel Concerts without any handling fee. Make checks payable to: Ruth Ann DeForest Mail to: East County Southern Gospel Concerts PO Box 21713 El Cajon, CA 92021 ONLY SOUTHERN TICKETS ON SALE NOW For more information, CALIFORNIA APPEARANCE call 619.442.5941
October 2015 | REFRESHED 21 outtakes
Football-themed ‘Woodlawn’ hits theaters Oct. 16 by MICHAEL FOUST Downes, known for his on-screen role in “Courageous,” produced “Woodlawn.” The best sports movies aren’t really When the fi lm opens, Bir- about sports. In fact, in the very best mingham is on edge, with fi ghts ones, sports are simply a backdrop for a regularly breaking out through- larger, more signifi cant story. out the school over the subject Such is the case with the upcoming of integration—and the super- faith-based fi lm “Woodlawn,” which hits intendent even threatening to theaters Oct. 16 and tells the true story shut Woodlawn down if school of racial integration in 1973 Birming- ham, Alabama, spotlighting the Wood- offi cials don’t get control of the lawn Colonels, which become the spiri- situation. C. Thomas Howell plays “Shorty” White, coach of Woodlawn tual spark that changes not only the high In the midst of this is a foot- High School’s chief rivals in “Woodlawn,” an exhilarating school but also the city. ball team that also has been in- football drama about how a spiritual awakening in 1970s “Woodlawn” was made in part by the tegrated, even though whites get Alabama led to love and unity overcoming racism and hate. Erwin Brothers, the tandem that also all of the playing time. Then one could have a few minutes to speak to the brought us “October Baby” and “Mom’s day a chaplain (played by Sean team. Geralds reluctantly agrees, and— Night Out,” the latter of which is one of Astin) walks into the school and asks incredibly—most of the players accept the funniest fi lms you’ll ever see. Kevin Coach Tandy Geralds (Nic Bishop) if he Christ. Geralds, not a person of faith, is shocked, not knowing what to do.
2015 But eventually Geralds, too, is AVAILABLEEDITION changed, and he decides to send the most talented black player into the game, running back Tony Nathan (Caleb Castille). Nathan rises above the racism exhibited by not only his teammates but also parents and fans. He becomes a Print standout player, so much so that legend- Online ary Alabama Coach Paul “Bear” Bryant (John Voight) recruits him. Digital fl ipbook “Woodlawn” director Andy Erwin is hoping the movie will help heal modern- Downloadable PDF day racial tensions. “It is the story about the redemption of Mobile-accessible a cynic through a reluctant hero with the Facebook infl uence of an unabashed optimist,” Er- win said. “And these three men mixed to- gether in the midst of this spiritual awak- ening that really hit America in the early Products and services ’70s called the Jesus Movement. Something featuring Christian-owned special happened, and a city healed.” and operated businesses. It is easily one of the most inspiring and uplifting fi lms I’ve seen, and one www.sandiegochristiandirectory.com that even non-football fans will enjoy. It also contains the most realistic football Anytime. Anywhere. Any way. action I’ve ever seen in a fi lm—a major achievement that even Hollywood fi lms Pick up a free copy at your church or local Christian book store. don’t reach. Or send email to [email protected] | 619.668-5100 Learn more at www.woodlawnmovie.com.
22 REFRESHED | October 2015 on the mark MARK LARSON
Embrace the inner boomer—or not
How did it come to this? My genera- voice), we had three TV channels, rab- dorky Midwestern 9-year-old in horn- tion, once the largest and most vibrant bit ears to tune in programs in black rimmed glasses, riding bikes and falling age group in America, is now in the and white. Remember the excitement of out of trees and now I’m a still-dorky process of entering the time of life shows suddenly being telecast ‘in living “senior citizen” with a need to drive known as aches, pains and the road to color?’” Music on AM Radio was awe- faster vehicles. retirement. In fact, our demographic has some. Experts will say, “You’re only as old always done things big, so we will be We were raised on Captain Kangaroo, as you feel.” So true, yet diffi cult to keep siphoning Social Security and Medicare Mr. Green Jeans, Bunny Rabbit and Mr. in mind when organizations like AARP money at a level never before seen in Moose. Davy Crockett hats, too (wh ich start sending membership card applica- our history. reminds me to get mine fumigated… if I tions about the time you turn 39. And That’s right, The Baby Boomers, can even fi nd it). It was the “Golden Age yes, some days our muscles and joints those of us born in the euphoric post- of Television.” have another message: Take a nap. World War II years, 1946 to 1964, have My message to fellow Boomers? Re- gone from being oh-so-hip to needing sist. As long as possible, don’t partici- hip replacements. The Boomers are now pate in the feeling of being “over.” seniors. Don’t let the culture dictate your I get chills and a wave of nausea mood. Sharpen your sense of humor. just writing the word senior. Stay current. Read and relate. Em- But here I am. My entire senior brace perspective and history. (there’s that word again!!!) high Keep “short accounts” with God, school class is turning into mile- and chat with the Almighty often. stone territory this year, all observ- Know what really matters in life. ing the 10th anniversary of turning Be inspired by those who kept 50. So we decided to celebrate this the pedal-to-the-metal until the month. Creator of the Universe said, “Time’s Why? Because at our 40th reunion up.” My grandfather made it to his we realized we weren’t sure how mid-90s. Ray Kroc starting hitting much fun it would be to wait until his prime after age 55, as did Ben our 50th. We imagined name tags Franklin (For those under 30, look with 100 point fonts, for example. ‘em up on Google). My friend Walter Besides, our group always loved a ran a major company until he was good party. Milestone events come back to our nearly 97. Disneyland and McDonald’s burst minds like today’s news. Elvis, The Cu- And by all means, always nurture onto the national scene during the same ban missile crisis, the space race to the that 9-year-old geeky kid inside you, to year we came onto the scene. We were moon, JFK in Dallas, the Beatles, Viet- help keep the oh-so-responsible adult more than 76 million strong and were nam and on and on through the “Sum- in line. I’m working on turning that at- cool and cutting edge for what seemed mer of Love.” It was our time, and we titude into an art form. like forever…or so we told ourselves. We were in charge. also occasionally did lots of dumb stuff If we took a poll of Boomers, most Larson is a longtime and learned the hard way. But what a would agree there was not much re- Southern California life … so far. ally great music after sometime in the radio/television Then “BOOM!” indeed. Where did the 1980s. But with our demo spanning the personality. His voice is time go? mid-1940s to early 1960s, that timeline heard on KPRZ 1210AM So much of what we knew to be Our can be very subjective. Suffi ce it to say and his weekday Era, ahead of the rest of America, now rap music isn’t getting much play at our talkshow airs 6 to 9 a.m. seems so quaint. “Why, back in our day reunions. on AM 1170 “The Answer.” He’s also a news analyst (hear me saying this in my best geezer So here we are. One day I’m the on KUSI TV. Learn more at marklarson.com.
October 2015 | REFRESHED 23 Jon Huckin’s older perspective childen, Ruby and Rose, hold newborn twins JON HUCKINS Hank and Lou.
To my four kids, from Dad
After fi ve days in the hospital fi lled struck by the reality that most fathers in a world of hurry. with overwhelming joy, paralyzing fear around the globe are forced to welcome My dear ones, may your relative comfort and complete exhaustion in the wake their kids into a world where there is no and inherited privilege not lead to com- of the recent birth of our twins, I fi nally “ladder” to climb because it has been placency, but instead be used to contend found a moment to walk outside the fl o- knocked out from under them by broken for the fl ourishing of others. May you be rescent lights and sit under the bright systems that are breaking people. willing to sacrifi ce your reputation, fi nanc- moon. Sitting on a small patch of grass A world where many kids are born into es and time in order to stand in front of any outside the hospital doors, the reality of families fl eeing violent persecution and bulldozer that is fl attening people. Like the being a father to four kids fi nally hit me. being nursed on the trauma of war in bat- Jesus we follow, may you return evil with I was both overwhelmed and over- tered refugee camps; places where the good and choose not to get even, but get joyed by the gift and responsibility of rais- thought of hope is a distant second to creative in love. ing four kids in a world so desperately in simply fi ghting to survive. May you lead out of your identity as need of mustard seeds of hope that might A world where one’s value is more ones fi rst and foremost loved by God, so one day blossom into healing and beauty. closely associated with gender (male) you can give yourselves fully to God and As I sat in relative comfort and began than with the beautiful uniqueness inher- others. If you get anything, please get to dream big dreams for my kids, I was ent in every new life. this: Your identity is not based on what But it is also a world pregnant with you do, but who you are. All is grace, dear possibilities. A world where former ene- ones, and you are God’s beloved. As such, mies move beyond their past, share tables your mother and I will always love you, and begin to imagine a future together. contend for you, pray for you and stand Cal Thomas A world where the blossoms of new life with you no matter what choices you make begin to sprout in the shadowy corners of or what you “do” or don’t do. forgotten neighborhoods. Whether you join God’s mission of recon- A world where the diversity of God’s ciliation in the halls of power or the back al- UÊ £Ê >Ì>ÞÊ Kingdom begins to awaken our eyes and leys of forgotten neighborhoods, may you see -Þ`V>Ìi`Ê hearts to the new world God is making. and participate in the restoration made real ÕÃÌ It is in this world—a world that is in Jesus’ death and resurrection. May you taste, feel, see and experience a Kingdom UÊ ÝÊ iÜÃÊ both beautiful and broken—that I offer this prayer over my four kids: where the last will be fi rst and the fi rst will >ÞÃÌ be last. For it is there that love lives. UÊ *À viÊ May you see the humanity, dignity and And, day in and day out, may we be par- `ÛV>Ìi image of God in everyone. Regardless of ents who live and model the kind of lives we documentation, orientation or association, are inviting you to live. may you choose to see the face of Jesus in all Much love to each of you, Ruby, /ÊÃV i`ÕiÊ >Ê/ >ÃÊ those put in your path. May you see those Rosie, Hank & Lou. vÀÊÞÕÀÊiÝÌÊëiV>ÊiÛiÌ]Ê who are different than you not through the Dad VÌ>VÌÊ >ÀÊ >Àð lens of judgment, but with a spirit of curios- ity and posture of invitation. (619) 881-2851 May you immerse yourself in the muck Jon Huckins is the co- >ÀJ>À>ÀðV and messiness of everyday life, seeking to founding director of The Global Immersion understand rather than be understood. Project, Missional May you move toward broken people Leadership Coach with and places, catalyzed by hope rather than Thresholds, family man, paralyzed by fear. And, fi nally, as you speaker and author move deeper into relationship with these of “Thin Places” and www.SpeakersGroup.net people and places, may you stick around “Teaching Through the Art of Storytelling.” Follow for the long haul, offering radical presence his blog at www.jonhuckins.net.
24 REFRESHED | October 2015 People who live in the moment reality check tend to be happier, more empathic DANIEL JENKINS and tend to feel more secure.
Living in the moment
“This is the day that the Lord has and now. You can bbe so distracted by the past made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it.” Worry and anxietyty or the ffutureu that the present ex- — Psalm 118:24 are what happen perieperiencen is squandered away. It’s when we think OOKK to eat a Twinkie from time to I learned many lessons about life about the bad timtime,e but choose to savor every at my fi rst job. Rocky Home Dairy in things that could bbiteite and enjoy the moment Lakeside was a great place to acquire happen to us in whewhen you do. the basics of being a good employee. But the future. One SStaying grounded in this one particular lesson came from a most of my anxious momoment has been found to unexpected source. clients said, hahavev very positive physical and Every week we would get a visit from “What if the pspsychologicalyc effects. People the Hostess man, a large Greek fellow El Niño rains whwhoo llive in the moment tend to with a bushy moustache. He would in- fl ood me out?” be hahappier,pp more empathic and ventory the new Twinkies, Zingers and My question tetendnd ttoo fefeel more secure. Snowballs so fast it was hard to keep up. back to her was, MaMaybeybe this is the way God intend- Although he seemed to have a mundane “What can you ed uuss to llive rather than in anxious job, he was one of the happiest persons do to prevent that anticipaanticipationt or painfully replaying I ever met. from happening?” tthehe pastpast.. If we can fully grasp that He usually had a bit of wisdom to Rather than worry no mattmattere what happens we can share, and it often came out of left fi eld. about it, the solu- ttrustrust ththata our lives are in His hands, I recall one time saying, “I can’t wait for tion is to do some- then wwee can safely stay grounded the weekend. I wish today was Friday.” thing in the here andnd in thethe present. What followed my statement was a now to prepare for iit.t. TToo borrow a quote from Chris lecture about how I shouldn’t wish my ToTomlin’sm song, “Sovereign”: life away, how each moment is precious, Consequences of and that all we really have is our present anxiety In your everlasting arms, experience. Anger and depres-s- All the pieces of my life, How profound! sion are what happenen to From beginning to the end, Our objective reality is composed of a us when we get draggedgged I can trust you. moment-to-moment existence, much like down by the past. HHowow a tape recorder that is playing music from many times do we replayeplay If you haven’t heard a cassette tape. Our experiences can be painful experiences overover this song, please take a thought of as sequentially unwinding be- and over again in ourur moment, go to YouTube fore our eyes as we live out our lives. imaginations? This jjustust and listen to the com- Subjectively, though, we worry about adds to the emotional forting lyrics. the future and ruminate about the past. pain and it distracts us from living life Now is all we have, and with faith, At work we dream about that upcoming in the present. that is enough. vacation in the mountains. While up in Have you ever sat down to a meal and the mountains we worry about all the rather than savoring the fl avors of the Daniel Jenkins, Ph.D. work piling up on our desks, waiting for food, you are, instead, caught up in a is a licensed clinical us when we return. memory about the past or are dreaming psychologist at Imagine what a tape recorder would about the future? Before you know it the Lighthouse Psychological sound like if it played music from multi- food is gone and you barely remember Services in Mission Valley. ple places on the tape at the same time. eating it. You missed what was right be- He is also a professor I bet it would sound pretty chaotic—just fore you and are left unsatisfi ed. There’s of psychology at Point like our thoughts when we live in the a natural tendency to overindulge when Loma Nazarene University. Learn more at www. past and the future rather than the here this happens. lighthousepsy.com.
October 2015 | REFRESHED 25 on the money
JANICE THOMPSON
Practically speaking… Pulling the trigger on retirement
“What do you mean we should work Life expectancy: People often balk longer?” This is a common expression when we talk about planning well into we hear when clients decide they want their mid-90s, but there has been a dra- to move up their retirement date but matic increase in the average life expec- don’t quite have key foundational pieces tancy. I don’t see this changing, given in place. Shifting from the accumulation our medical and technological advances. phase (saving for your future goals) to Infl ation: We’ve been in a low-in- vital need. the distribution phase (spending down terest rate environment for quite some Have a focus? Since our western ver- assets to replace your paycheck) re- time but it wasn’t that long ago when sion of retirement is more a traditional quires thoughtful planning. Before you infl ation was more than 6 percent for rather than biblical concept, we always walk away from that job for good, let 20-year periods. Don’t underestimate ask people to tell us what they are go- me share some common challenges we what can happen to your purchasing ing to retire TO before they retire FROM encounter as we help clients prepare for power if infl ation edges up and again the workforce. Missing interactions with this important transition. becomes a major challenge to a retiree. colleagues, feeling aimless with less Social Security. Just because you are routine or fi nding it diffi cult to feel a If you want to sabotage your retirement, eligible to fi le does not mean it is the sense of meaning and purpose in daily ignore these: optimal time to fi le. Many variables go life are common themes that surface a Consumer Debt: It doesn’t matter if into making a wise decision with this few years into retirement if there has it is at zero percent interest, it can even- important asset. Be sure you consider all been no life planning for this important tually cost you! Consider this: If you the angles before your election. stage. Exploring a new hobby, serving can’t pay it off now with earned income, in a non-profi t, or cultivating a long- what makes you think it will be any eas- If you want an enjoyable retirement later, suppressed passion can lead to greater ier when you’re living off your assets? here’s what to consider now: retirement fulfi llment. Just be sure to Additionally, if you still carry long-term Have a good job? Think carefully plan for the cash fl ow needed to allow balances into retirement, it’s usually a before walking away. Consider easing you to enjoy these endeavors. warning sign you are living beyond your into retirement by stepping down to Answering the “Can I retire yet” means. part-time work. question requires examining a complex Overspending: There is a common Have consumer debt? Pay it off be- set of variables. What you don’t know disconnect between spending projec- fore you resign. now can defi nitely hurt you later. No tions and actual spending behavior. Have mortgage debt? Pay it off two retirement plans look alike—situ- Think you can live on $$$? Great! Prac- while you still have a paycheck. From ations are unique and so are the solu- tice living on that amount for at least our experience, clients who retire free of tions. If you haven’t yet done retirement six months and see how it works. Too a mortgage seem to enjoy their retire- planning, start now while you can do restrictive? Consider what that will feel ment more than those who don’t. something about it. like for the next 30-plus years. And be Have a retirement spending plan? aware that the fi rst few years in retire- Practice living on it for at least six Janice Thompson is a ment can be very expensive as you fi ll months before you walk away from your certifi ed fi nancial planner your time with things you’ve not been job. And don’t forget to include things and co-founder/CEO of able to do because of work. like additional travel, hobbies, major One Degree Advisors, Withdrawing too much too fast: It home repairs or saving for a replace- Inc. A frequent speaker doesn’t take very long to deplete even ment vehicle. on fi nancial topics and a signifi cant portfolio if you withdraw Have a plan for major medical ex- mentor for fi nancial too much too fast, especially in the early penses? Medical, dental and long-term professionals, she also serves on the board of years. Add volatile markets or fl at years care expenses are typically higher than directors for Kingdom Advisors. Learn more at www. to the mix, and the odds of outliving anticipated and usually not covered onedegreeadvisors.com. your portfolio assets goes up exponen- by traditional insurance or Medicare. Advisory services offered through One Degree Advisors, Inc.SM Securities offered through Securities America, Inc., Member FINRA/SIPC. One Degree Advisors and Securities Amer- tially. Evaluate how you plan to handle this ica are separate companies.
26 REFRESHED | October 2015 purposeful parenting
MICHAEL FOUST
3 things to tell your kids about ‘scary monsters’
It was a quiet evening at our house what I tell myself when I’m afraid. It’s angels are great, but they have their one spring evening when a voice of ter- quite simple: 1. Angels are watching limits. Unlike God, they don’t know ev- ror rang out from my 3-year-old son’s over you. But not the cute kind you erything. They also—unlike God—can’t bedroom. see at the local Hallmark store. That’s be everywhere. If you’re going to get “Daaaaaad!” he shouted, begging me make-believe. I’m talking about angels spooked at night and can have only to come. as described in Scripture: “For he will one “person,” you want God, not just I walked toward his door to investi- command his angels concerning you an angel. That’s why God told Joshua: gate, assuming he either wanted cover- to guard you in all “Be strong and courageous … the LORD ing up or needed a drink off waterwater.. youryour ways”ways” yyourour GGodod is with you wherever you go” On this night, though, hehe had some-some- (Joshua 11:9). And that’s why God was at thing else on his mind. tthehe centcentere of the conversation with my “I’m scared of the monster,”ster,” he ssonon tthathat night. God was with him in his said, with an innocent lookk in his bbed,ed, at ththe very moment God was with eyes and fear on his face. Mom anandd Dad, his brothers and sister, For once, I was speechless.ess. aandnd evereveryy other person who calls on the No one in our house watcheshes name ooff the Lord. God is comforting scary movies or shows, andd mimillionsllions of people—all at the same time! we don’t even read scary That, itself, is comforting. books. The “scari- est” story he had ever 3. Mommy and Daddy heard likely was David are in the next room. vs. Goliath. OObvious, yes, but kids often But he had seen a few cartoonishartoonish neeneedd tthehe tangible, physical presence of toddler-friendly “monsters”” on TV, ssomeoneomeone from time to time—just as we and his mind was swirling wwithith all do. ThThe Bible says we were meant creepy thoughts. ttoo encencourageou and comfort one another. Of course, he was and iss not ThThatat nignight,h it was my role to do that alone in being afraid of imagi-agi- ververyy tthinghin for my son. nary objects in the dark—andnd it’s not OOnene fi nal thought: Say all of this just kids who are like that. with ententhusiasm.h I got in my son’s face We seem to be hard-wiredd to bbee uun-n- (Psalm(Psalm ththatat nignighth and excitedly told him that easy at night. Why? It’s the ffearear ooff tthehe 91:11).91:11). The no matmatterte where he looked in his room, unknown and the mysterious.s. DurinDuringg writerwriter of God was there—“in that corner, in that the day, we easily could openn the curtain HebrewsHebrews cclosetloset … right here in your bed!” And and see that a tree branch is scraping tthehe rreferenceseferences you knknowow what? He fell asleep right window. But at night? We can’t see what’s angels who away—and does so each time I remind outside—and we’re certainly not going are “ministering him of God and His angels. It’s a heart- outside to explore. And so our imagination spirits sent out to serve” God’s children ening thought for a 3-year-old. runs wild, often chasing the most fright- (Hebrews 1:14). My son has read about And you and me, too. ening thought we can conjure. angels and knows what they are: They were created by God and are servants I could have told him that “there are Michael Foust is the of God. Angels in the Bible comforted no monsters,” but that’s only half true. father of four small Mary and then the shepherds in the The real-world “monsters”—Satan and children and blogs fi eld. I’m sure they’re well suited to his demons—wreak more havoc than about parenting at any on-screen monster ever will. comfort my tiny son, too. michaelfoust.com. As it turns out, what I did tell my son—at least, most of what I said—is 2. God is watching over you. Sure,
October 2015 | REFRESHED 27 inspired living
NATE LANDIS Our souls . . . were designed to listen to, and meet, God in stillness. Finding rest in the rush
For families, the back-to-school plied by saying, “A little season means new schedules, fresh more.” Even with all his routines, football, shorter days, and the wealth and his incred- excitement of focusing again after sum- ible accomplishments, mer vacation. Rockefeller longed for As fall kicks off, however, the busy- more out of life. He was ness and stress of juggling life can trapped in the cycle of feel overwhelming at times. Amid the needing “a little more” fall frenzy of homework, rides, meals, in order to feel like his sports, church, meetings, the arts, ap- life contained “enough.” proaching holidays, work commitments, I often let people experience 60 seconds and family activities, many of us wonder Finding true satisfaction of pure, uninterrupted silence while where to fi nd moments of solitude and Satisfaction of the soul is not found I stand quietly up front. This rare gift silence to restore our souls. by packing more things, noise or hurry feels like an eternity for some. Others Some of us may ask whether regular into our schedules. Doing so only cre- get nervous and glance around because moments of peace and rest are even ates what author C.S. Lewis calls an we are simply not used to it. In presen- possible anymore? ever-increasing appetite for an ever- tations and production, we are taught to diminishing pleasure. In other words, if avoid silence at all costs. Noise and hurry in our age we try to satisfy the hunger of our souls Our souls, however, were designed to Refl ecting on the frantic pace set by with anything other than God we will listen to, and meet, God in stillness. our culture, psychologist Carl Jung once experience a craving that cannot be ap- With practice, we can learn to toler- remarked, “Hurry is not of the Devil. peased. After each encounter, we end up ate and then appreciate time alone with Hurry is the Devil.” Jung noticed how, as hungrier than when we started. Refl ect- God. modern people, we resist slowing down, ing on his own life journey, St. Augus- Carving out 20 minutes each day to quieting our lives enough to truly listen tine declared, “Our heart is restless until listen to God in silence and through His to the stirrings of our own souls. it fi nds its rest in Thee.” Word can bring renewal and joy to our But silence can be scary. In silence, Time alone with God, in the stillness souls. our fears, pain, loneliness, failures of silence and solitude, provides the God challenges us, and promises us, and broken relationships come to the only place where the human soul can be that we will not go away unsatisfi ed surface. Instead of facing such inner satisfi ed. In Psalm 23, David writes that when we come to Him. Psalm 34:8 de- realities, it is sometimes easier to stay the Lord, “makes me lie down in green clares, “Taste and see that the LORD is plugged into ear buds, fl at screens, pastures, he leads me beside still waters, good.” smartphones, an endless fl ow of media, he restores my soul.” I want to invite you to give God a and packed schedules. Are you willing to let God still the chance to satisfy your soul this fall. Will Avoiding the voice of God and our own waters of your soul this fall? you take the challenge to spend 20 min- personal struggles, however, is not a recipe When someone fi nds peace with utes alone with the LORD, listening in for contentment. A full schedule does not God, silence becomes a friend instead of silence, and reading His Word? automatically translate to a full soul. In something to fear. As we set up our fall Your soul will not be disappointed. fact, our attempt to pack more noise and schedules, why not build in time to ex- hurry into our lives often leaves us feeling perience God through silence, solitude The Rev. Nate Landis, Ph.D., emptier and emptier. and time in His Word? Investing time is president and founder of Someone once asked John D. Rocke- to establish a counter-cultural schedule Urban Youth Collaborative. feller—one of the richest oil and railroad with room for rest would be well worth He serves as Pastor to tycoons in all of American history—to the sacrifi ce. Schools at New Vision answer the question, “How much is Christian Fellowship, a enough?” Our country’s fi rst billionaire, Learning to enjoy silence multi-ethnic congregation who seemingly owned everything, re- When I speak to groups on this topic, in North Park .
28 REFRESHED | October 2015 marketplace
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October 2015 | REFRESHED 29 that’s life!
JOANNE BROKAW
Confessions of an offi ce supply addict
I spent a half hour today sharpening folders or a snazzy new pen. have three calendars within arm’s reach, pencils. I enjoy the act of standing at an I have a notebook in every room in but I never know what day it is. old-fashioned sharpener and turning my house, one in my car and one in my I know what you’re thinking: there’s the crank, hearing the blade grind the purse, so when I have an idea I can write an app for that. Calendars on your wood and graphite to a fi ne point and it down quickly, before I forget it. I keep phone, e-books, virtual folders and doc- watching the shavings build into a pile a supply of pocket folders in a range of uments. But I’m not interested. at my feet. It helps me clear my head colors to suit my every mood. I have a It’s not just the fact that I can’t when I’m stressed, on a column deadline panic attack if I can’t fi nd my stapler. keep up with the latest technology on a or stumped by the Saturday crossword. I think my addiction is rooted in writer’s budget. The truth is that I like I picked up the yellow No. 2 pencils my childhood. As a kid, I loved getting doing things the old-fashioned way. I ready for the new school year, the smell like putting a real pencil to actual paper while I was out running errands. I lim- of autumn and new possibilities in the and scribbling away, crossing out words, ited myself to just one box because the air, my book bag fi lled with folders, rewriting sentences, and doodling in the truth is that if I didn’t, I would have freshly sharpened pencils and clean, margins when I’m mentally blocked. I skipped the milk and bread and spent white notebook paper just begging to be think better that way. the grocery money on school supplies. fi lled with stories, notes and essays. And science backs me up on this. Never mind that I don’t have kids in Every fall, I would vow that this Study after study has found that stu- school anymore or that I’m not in school would be the year I would stay orga- dents who take notes longhand actually myself. It’s “Back to School” time, which nized. This year, I would put the sci- comprehend and retain information bet- means supplies are on sale, and that’s a ence notes in the science folder and the ter and longer than students who take dangerous time of the year for me. English notes in the English folder. This notes on a laptop. Researchers think Because I’m an offi ce supply addict. year, I would save all of the quizzes so it has to do with the cognitive process I have an abnormal addiction to I could study for the cumulative fi nal. necessary to listen to someone speak- pens, paper, pencils, notepads, jour- This year, I would record every home- ing, digest the meaning in their words, nals—you name it. I rarely walk out of work assignment in my pocket calendar and then succinctly condense the infor- a store without having purchased some and never again be scrambling at the mation into notes. Our brains process sort of stationery item—paper clips, fi le last minute to complete a project. that differently then when we’re typing But it alwaysalways enendedde the same. In less the words verbatim on a laptop. tthanhan a month, I hadhad geometry theo- In other words, a valid rationaliza- rems mixed iin with grammar tion for me to buy more offi ce supplies. notes. I wwouldo show up to Thank you, science! Pencils and note- science cclassl with my Span- books are still on sale! Who needs gro- ish textbtextbooko (“Wait,” I’d ceries, anyway? ask, ““queque hhorao es?”) and had ttakenaken to wwriting homework Award-winning freelance assignassignmentsm on my hands writer Joanne Brokaw ((II had ttheh fi rst Palm Pilot). spends her days dreaming My llockerocker always looked of things she’d like to llikeike a totornadorna had blown do but probably never tthroughhrough a paperp factory. will— like swimming It’s 30 yyearsea later and I’m with dolphins, cleaning still not organized.organiz I’m continually the attic and someday overcoming the trauma didigginggging throuthroughgh a ttowering pile of of elementary school picture day. She lives with folders on my kitchekitchenn table to hunt for two dogs, a cat, six chickens and one very patient research notes, paperpaper clips and pens. I husband. Learn more at www.joannebrokaw.com.
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October 2015 | REFRESHED 31