Postal Patron U.S. Postage Paid PRSRT STD ECRWSS Permit #91 Lecanto, FL WEST MARION SERVING THE COMMUNITIES & BUSINESSES BETWEEN SR 200 AND US 27 WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 28, 2019MessengerVOLUME 13 NUMBER 18 GET SMART Love me tender THE POLL If Joe Biden gets the Democrat nomination for president, who would you vote for: Donald Trump or Biden? Vote online. DO IT WRITE Where did you put the modifiers? Wrong: At 17, my fa- ther taught me to drive. Right: My father taught me, at 17, how to drive. WATCH OUT If you’re planning to Former Elvis tribute artist Eddie Lemon moved into Fairfield Village. He put his collection on display in the community. See Priscilla’s column travel, create the illu- inside. Photos by Priscilla Barnett sion that you or some- one is in your home. You can leave the tele- vision and the front Stop your MUTTering. door lights on, and in- stall exterior motion In celebration of the Aug. 31 National Mutt Day, this month we’re publishing the top dogs – according to their detectors for lights. owners – of our readers. It’s actually called National Mixed Breed Day. KEEP IT SHORT, SILLY From Dick Frank’s column. A young man re- ported for his first day of work at a supermar- ket. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and gave him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep the store.” “But, I’m a FSU grad- uate,” the young man replied indignantly, “I even played football there.” “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know that,” said the manager. “Here, give me the broom, I better show you how.” NINE LIVES Here’s another op- portunity to showcase your pet and get your tag a waving. Follow- ing the success for our mighty mutts in Au- Nick Fortuna’s pit bull-lab, Lola, is contemplating her next move Findley says to Leslie Yanez, “Hey, take a look at this.” gust, we’ve offering our readers the oppor- tunity to present your felines to the public. Labor Day gas prices expect to be lowest in 2 years Oct. 29 is National STAFF REPORT was on Labor Day 2018 ($2.80), of producing gasoline. Gas promote a slight and temporary Cat Day. In honor cats Labor Day is quickly ap- and 27 cents less than Labor Day prices should remain low head- bump at the pump before the and kitties everywhere, proaching and gas prices for the 2017 ($2.64). ing into the holiday, unless holiday. However, after Labor send us pictures of holiday weekend are lining up “Labor Day travelers continue something threatens fuel sup- Day, refineries begin their sea- your little precious to be the lowest in 2-3 years. to benefit from lower oil prices plies like geopolitical tension or sonal switch to winter-blend ones with your name However, there are still a num- this year as they fill-up for their a hurricane in the Gulf of Mex- and a brief description gasoline. Summer-blend gaso- ber of factors could push prices Labor Day road trip,” said Mark ico.” to editor@smcitizen. line is more expensive to pro- com. higher before the holiday. Jenkins, spokesman, AAA - The Labor Day marks the end of Florida drivers are currently Auto Club Group. “Strong US the busy summer travel season, duce than winter-blend, because paying an average price of $2.37 oil production rates are holding and the last big surge in gasoline the EPA requires more additives TWO CENTS at the pump. The state average oil prices about 15% below last demand before the fall. The ex- in the warmer months of the WORTH is 43 cents per gallon less than it year’s levels, reducing the cost pectation of strong demand can year. Our Letters to the Editor provides a plat- form for readers to share and exchange ideas and observa- Can you really tell me what time it is? tions. Our policies for he children are re- change, in a say it anyway, and it’s our own making. complain! letters are outlined on turning to school. sense for the true: Before you know it, Time swings us across a In the twilight of de- our editorial page. The weather will better. The we’ll be preparing for the swath of precarious de- cades, as the numbers We want to do some- T soon be cooling. And weather will holidays and the New cades, sometimes wildly, climb with increasing ve- thing in addition to the snowbirds are contem- continue to Year. And, after that, an- sometimes graciously, locity, we wonder in our letters section. While plating their long trek improve. other blistering summer. sometimes unnervingly. contemplative moments: the letters section al- south in the next few Florida’s And even another elec- We shield ourselves oc- If only I knew then what I lows you to opine at months. winter and tion. casionally from the move- know now, life would be length, our new Two This may be time for Bill Koch autumn are Time carries us to many ment of time. After all, so much fuller, smoother Cents section will some peace, quiet and Editor splendid. places, each presenting us why does it have go this and perhaps grander; I allow you to make a fun. It’s time to enjoy But you with particular opportuni- quickly? On the other would have avoided statement, short, sweet home sweet home. know all ties. We are unwilling hand, the young experi- youthful follies and made and brief. It’s limited Cherish this time – for that already. travelers on a journey not ence time differently; it wiser choices. to 20 words. what it’s worth. It’ll Although it’s cliché, we always or ultimately of moves too slowly, they See BILL/Page 2 000WP2M A2 Wednesday, august 28, 2019 West Marion Messenger Eddie Elvis’s amazing collection Laboring for Laughs BY PRISCILLA words,” I will let the pho- onday is Labor “But, I’m a FSU gradu- fired six times. the new foreman.” BARNETT tos of some of Eddie’s trea- Day, a holiday ate,” the young man re- Card dealers at blackjack “So are we,” replied one that America has plied indignantly, “I even In my article last week, I sures show what an M tables have been replaced worker, “sit down and celebrated on the first played football there.” by machines called auto told you a little bit about amazing collection he has. have a smoke.” Monday in Septem- “Oh, I’m sorry. I dealers. our wonderful neighbor, This is just a very small Editorial Decisions ber since 1882. The didn’t know that,” Some people are still Webster’s dictionary ed- Eddie Lennon, who is a portion, but it shows the former ETA (Elvis Tribute original idea was to said the manager. willing to do an honest itors met to decide how to variety of objects. Artist). In addition to his have a street parade “Here, give me the day’s work; but they want abridge the new edition. We in Fairfield Village performing, Eddie met demonstrating the broom, I better a week’s pay for it. “We are listing too many are so proud that Eddie many very memorable strength of trade show you how.” You really are getting old words that no one uses and his wife Sharon are and labor organiza- Laboring people associated with old when your work is less any more, they’ve gotta Elvis who helped him part of the community tions. Now many Nowadays, gov- fun and your fun is more Dick go,” Said the chief editor. amass his collection of known as “the lively place consider the holiday ernment employees work. Frank “It’s time we faced the fact Elvis memorabilia. filled with lovely people.” to be the end of are people who ar- I do most of my work Pun that we can’t have archaic Since a picture is cer- Contact Priscilla at pris- summer while oth- en’t ashamed of sitting down. That’s where Alley and edit too.” tainly “worth a 1000 [email protected]. ers just welcome a their convictions. I shine. day off work. A good union “It’s not just the work I Timely Anticipating the coming man believes that time enjoy,” confided the cab “I hear the men are strik- holiday, some locals held a heals all wounds. Time driver, “it’s the people I ing.” parade on Pun Alley to and a half heals them a lit- run into.” “What for?” leave some interesting sto- tle faster. Every time I have to “Shorter hours.” ries. If all the cars in the give one of those motiva- “Good luck to them. I al- Sleepless United States were placed tional speeches, I get a ways did think sixty min- A harried business exec- end to end, it would prob- stomachache. I hope I utes was too long for an utive went to his physician ably be Labor Day week- don’t have a pep-talk hour.” to get a prescription for end. ulcer. Psychic hotline sleeping pills, only to find He’s a gunner in a can- When a houseboat The company had a that he was allergic to sed- ning factory. He shells grows up it becomes a phone line that was only atives. peas. township. used for outgoing fax calls. “What about some of The ushers at a hit musi- There was a guy who If any calls came in on this this twilight sleep I’ve read cal cheered and stamped met his wife at a single’s line John knew it would be about?” he asked the doc- their feet at each curtain bar.