The Drink Tank 88

the drink tank issue 88

chris for taff This is a special issue as we’ll be talk- I am that Mexican girl who smoked I am that Mexican girl whose cousins ing about Mexicans and Mexico. Ju- shitty weed before she turned ten. never made it anywhere but jail, the dith, who hasn’t written poetry in only one who went anywhere being the years, sent me a piece she did recently I am that Mexican girl. The one you one smart enough to get the hell away based on the life of one of my cousins. see when you close your eyes and try from the rest. as a contributor with a piece that really and conjure up the image of the young moved me. So here we go, South of the Latina you want to throw down hard I am that Mexican girl who wrote sto- Border, down Mexico Way. over the edge of your bed. ries to tell her daughter from the day I turned thirteen. When I walk into stores, carrying the baby, the Korean bitch behind the I’m the Mexican girl who has read them counter looks at me and steps closer to all to her. the cash register. When I pay in cash, she always holds it up to the light. I am the Mexican girl who got a job with the County of Santa Clara on my I am that Mexican girl with the tattoo first try. that stretches across her back spelling out the name of my baby-girl. And on my first day, they all looked at me and asked how old I really was. “I’m 19.” I told them. “I knew you D-I-A-N-A weren’t 23.” my manager said. I am that Mexican girl who dropped I am the Mexican girl whose daughter out of high school when I still had a will be spoiled by Uncles and Cousins 3.5 GPA. That Mexican Girl and Mothers and anyone else who feels the need. by I am that Mexican girl whose mother Judith Morel lit up in the house before I should have I am also the mother who won’t let her known what she was doing. I am that Mexican girl who got herself daughter fuck things up like her Moth- er did. She’ll hate me but she’ll never knocked up at fourteen and decided to One night, when Diana was crying and have the baby. have to go through the shit I went I couldn’t sleep through all that little through. brat’s screaming, I thought I could feel I am that Mexican girl who fought the air being pulled out of my chest, the bitch who touched my boyfriend’s I am the Mexican girl who should be the blood out of my heart, the thougths calling herself a Mexican woman, but I crotch six nights after she had her own out of my brain. I couldn’t get out of abortion. want these last few days of my youth, bed: there was an Old Hag on top of these last hours before I pass. me. My connection with my Mexican side US, held over several days at Madison promotion has been in existence. has always been through wrestling. Square Garden). Lucha took the idea of There’s nothing that comes close to That should explain all of the art in the masked wrestler and incorporated that number (the McMahon promotion this issue. Unlike my connection with it into a long tradition dating back would go back almost 50 years). my Jewish side (which is entirely to the Aztecs. Warriors would put on At first, it was much like Ameri- through comedy), I’m only a Mexican masks and become gods. That tradition can wrestling: a sport of stereotypes. when I turn on Lucha Libre. continued on even after the Catholi- They would have wrestlers billed as be- The question What is Lucha? cization of Mexico. Still, almost every ing The Mackay Cylone (from Ireland), is the toughest to answer. You may festival included the donning of masks the American Brute, Yacui Joe. They’d as well ask me which is my favourite and the playing of roles. The over-sized all fill roles and wherever Mexico stood kidney...oh, who am I kidding? it’s papier mache heads that are often seen with a country would determine wheth- the right. Lucha is a sport. Lucha is a in festivals are the natural outgrowth er the wrestler was a good guy (Tech- spectacle. Lucha is a lifestyle. It’s all of and are recognisable around the world. nico) or a villain (Rudo). That was the those things, often at once to the same The one who started Mexican way all wrestling was even as late as people. the 1980s (or the 1990s, when an Iraqi With the possible exception of sympathizer character was given to Japanese Pro Wrestling (which is an- the formerly patriotic Sgt. Slaughter). other article waiting to happen) Lucha Some would argue it’s still the same Libre is the most exceptional type of today. wrestling in the world. There is little During the 1930s, it was typi- nuance in Lucha, it’s a brash and cal to see Americans and Spaniards brassy world that gets created from the to be in the main events, but on the moment you enter the arena/pop in wrestling was a fellow named Salva- undercards, there were more and more the tape. There are traditions both in dor Lutteroth. He was a promoter masked wrestlers. Rudy Guzman was the ring and in the audience. There are of Boxeo and he had gone to Liberty one of them. He worked under his real chants and there are signs and there Hall, Texas, and saw some wrestling in name for a while and then ended up are ways of signifying loss and victory. 1929. Texas was a hotbed of wrestling changing his gimmick to wearing a And of course, there are masks. at the time (and would be again in the silver mask (well, at first it was leather, The word Luchador in Ameri- 1960s and certainly in the 1980s) and but it became Silver soon) and then he can circles has come to mean masked Luttheroth convinced some people gained fame for his name: El Santo- El wrestler. There are more masked wres- to fund him starting a federation. He Enmascarado del Plata! tlers in Mexico than anywhere else, but called Empressa Mexicana de Lucha He was quickly a major star, they neither invented it (that would Libre, EMLL or the Empressa as all the but he was never really a great worker. be the French in the late 1800s) nor wrestlers called it. Nowadays it’s called I mean, back in those days, you had popularized it (in the US around 1910, CMLL (Consejo Mundial de Lucha Li- to have a much bigger repetoire than a masked wrestler participated in the bre) but folks still call it La Empressa. most wrestlers have today, but he was most successful tournament ever in the That’s seventy plus years that a single a slight bit lower than most. The best workers of that period were almost al- for movies that either didn’t get made San Jose when I was very young. Sev- ways foreigners or guys like Gori Guer- or were deemed unusable. In addi- eral El Santo movies were released on rero (father of Eddie Guerrero), but tion, there were a lot of El Santo comic video tape, often due to the efforts of the best Mexican worker was a fellow books, released at a rate of roughly one K. Gordon Murray and Johnny Leg- named Demon Azul - The Blue Demon. a week for nearly twenty years. end. They introduced the movies and Blue Demon was a great worker In the 1980s, Americans started even started showing them on the big and a good shooter. He was a big star getting interested in the movies of El screen. I first saw Campeones de Justi- and when he was paired up with El Santo. I saw some of the films he made cio, starring El Santo, Blue Demon and Santo, it was almost always Demon in the 1970s at the Mexico theatre in Mil Mascaras (more on him later) at a that got the win. He was always second star to Santo though. Even though screening set up by Johnny in San he got more wins over Santo, it Francisco. never really launched him over Now, television didn’t stay Santo. away forever. There was TV by the One of the reasons that San- late 1960s, but wrestling was only to was so much bigger than Blue featured on special occasions, such Demon was the fact that Santo did as the EMLL anniversary shows. movies. Starting in the late 1940s, By the 1970s, there were challeng- Santo starred in a bunch of mov- ers to the supremacy of The Em- ies, cheaply made action films pressa. UWA came around with a with Santo as the James Bond/ giant new star: El Canek. He was Sherlock Holmes/Sly Stallone/ a giant star, and while most of the Superman character. He was real- big stars of EMLL over the years ly bigger than life. He made dozens had been light heavyweights, Canek of movies and they almost all had was a heavyweight. He was also the same thing - wrestling. far from the only major star. Mil There was no wide-spread Mascaras was there along with his television in Mexico at that point. brother, Dos Caras. UWA used the By the 1960s, even with some old theory. They brought in for- television (including the Span- eigners to meet Canek for his title. ish International Network which Andre the Giant headlined losing was HQed in Southern California), to Canek in 1984 before twenty-five movies were still the biggest mass thousand fans. One of Japan’s big- market for wrestling. Any of the gest stars, Tatsumi Fujinami, also footage we have of 1940s, 50s came in and traded the UWA title and 60s Lucha Libre is either di- with Canek. It was a big deal and it rectly from the films of El Santo or outdrew EMLL for a few years. Of from the matches that were shot course, Canek got old and Mil and to sell out Bullrings and Soccer stadi- well drawing weekly sell-outs to Arena ums. They were built around Konnan Mexico, but for winning Dancing with as well as other younger, faster, higher the Stars, the Mexican edition. His flying stars like Rey Misterio Jr. Kon- name is Latin Lover and sadly he had nan become a hugely popular attrac- to retire because of injuries in Febru- tion because he was feuding with guys ary. like Jake The Snake Roberts. The two So, that’s Lucha. Why do I iden- of them had a long feud that drew huge tify with it so much? There’s a huge crowds and the crowds were so crazy question. Maybe it’s that it’s an Ameri- that Jake often had to sneak out of the can sport (and Pro Wrestling is the arenas in the trunk of a car. most American of sports, it even has Southern California had always good writers!) that has been adapted brought in Mexican wrestlers, many by my other people. That would make of whom became big stars in places sense, but I think it’s just the Masks. like the Olympic Auditorium in LA. With AAA, they started running the LA Sports Arena and were selling out. The big attractions were Roberts, Konnan his friends moved back to EMLL, which and the son of El Santo: Hijo del Santo. had also been actively producing new That was a big deal and they had great wrestlers. In the 1980s, a new wrestler shows. Of course, in-fighting, Konnan’s named Konnan came about and that ego and American wrestling federa- was about to change things in even tions bringing a lot of guys in to the bigger ways. States all helped slow AAA, though it’s Television was still spotty in still around today and has managed the late 1980s, but the new booker to draw a few very good crowds for its (the guy who writes the stories) was traditional TripleMania. a guy named Paco Alonso. He was a EMLL, now CMLL, had a huge big thinker and after butting heads year in 2005. They own their major with the second generation of the Lut- arenas, including one of the four most theroth family, he left in the early famous arenas in the world: Arena 1990s and started AAA. Mexico. I should mention that the four AAA became the biggest thing other arenas, Madison Square Garden, in the history of Mexican wrestling. Korakuen Hall in Tokyo and The Tokyo WHile there were periods where guys Dome, all had a serious role in the his- like Santo would sell out arenas every tory of Lucha. The biggest star of 2005 week for years on end, AAA managed wasn’t for his wrestling, though he did There’s a community that wor- ear. ships masks. Not just the Mexican The woman who first wrote wide- wrestling masks, but all masks. Think ly about masked sex was Reina Arana. of those subs who don the full latex She wrote the article I read in From or leather gear. The ultimate sign of Parts Unknown and she is one of the submission is to allow your face to be most beautiful women who ever lived. covered, your identity to be replaced by Her character, the Queen of Spiders, black material that is hot and uncom- she wrote an article where she talked fortable. to the various Mexican wrestlers about But let me also say this - wres- whether or not they’d had sex with tling masks are hot too. A man in a their masks on. Almost all had, and mask coming at you with stiff intent one said that he’d done it only once, is likely the most intoxicating thing I but the mask stayed on all night. FPU, could imagine. Most masks leave you as the mag was better known, did all only the eyes and mouth of the man sorts of sexy photo shoots, includ- behind them. There’s little to suggest ing one where Dita Von Teese, now any humanity except for those two Mrs. Marilyn Manson, was a mummy small areas. That’s a lot of mystery. and Miss Arana undid her after wres- The fabric itself, when pressed against you, has an erotic feel that no human skin can emulate. When I first heard MexiSex of masked sex in the pages of Chris’ by all-time favorite magazine From Parts M Lloyd Unknown, I had to try it. My boyfriend of the time loved it, and as I was at the Note: This was supposed to be in Is- edge, I reached up and grabbed the sue 1 of Crass Dandy eyeholes, pulling it off as he...well, let’s It’s a fact that there are people that think the unknown is the sexi- say he enjoyed a rare privilege that est thing possible. The scene in Clerks evening. We did it a few more times, where Kaitlin Brae goes into the dark- the last being where I did not merely ened bathroom and has accidental remove it, but I ripped it like a Rudo at sex with a corpse, though not shown, Arena Mexico. I tore a piece of skin too, makes the hairs on the back of my blood staining the white lycra. I had to neck stand up. She was going into a yell at him like a Drill Sergeant to keep place of mystery and she had her way. fucking me. That was a night neither of What’s hotter than that? Well, I’d guess us will ever forget: me for the orgasms, if the guy hadn’t been a stiff, but still. him for the scar I left just about his tling here for several pages using the I used them lately? No, sadly, but takes me by the tie in a cliche I never Twelve-Inch Tap Out, a dildo that they’re there. I will lay in bed at night thought to encounter South of the glowed pink in the pages. After that, and see them, on their little stands Border. She led me to a corner and the Mummy purred like a kitten at her that Chris got for me, and I’ll let me wrapped her lips around mine, a tech- feet. hand slide low as the image of Reina nique calling for supreme submission. I bought several wrestling masks Arana, that SpiderQueen, holds me in over the years. My ex-husband would her rule. I’m powerless against her, far Secundo Caida wear one once in a while, mostly when more powerless than the Mummy was, I win this one. She pulls me to we’d had a fight and he wanted the hot but I fight her harder than any that a part of the house where the party is stuff before we actually dealt with the she has faced. long forgotten. Just two rooms over issue. But Arana’s concept made me It’s no fun unless you give a series of arguments over the price understand that women in masks were doubtless winner a little bit of a battle of trade will turn ugly in less than bigger deals. before you service them...right? five minutes. I let her have first small I’ve never managed to have a victories, but this fall belongs to me, woman who would put on the mask for the drama is built that way. I pin her me. I’ve put it on for a couple (in fact, against a wall and force her breasts a long-time pair who were out to find a out of her top. She presses against me third for play shortly after my divorce) harder, jobbing for me, giving me my and I hated it. I wanted to be the one victory. who was taking the identity away, who was waiting until the right mo- Tercero Caida ment to reveal the face of my freshest She can only squirm between conquest. They treated me well, made me the force I exert on her and the wall. feel secure as they had me serve them, She wraps a leg around mine, but I let me top them, had me play different push into her harder, the wall making roles to their amusement. It was en- a groan of weight misplaced. I break tertainment switchplay at best: I was back and run my hands up either more or less their dancing bear and at thigh. Her skirt lifts, but she puts times it pleased them to let the bear her hands on mine and pushes them have its way. down. I’ve still got a few masks, two A Bit of Sexiness from Mike Swan “No.” she says, plainly, heavily. that Chris gave me as a gift one Christ- She stares into my eyes and mas, another that Jay bought when Primero Caida pulls away, replaces her shirt and he came out to Oz to see me and bring She walks up to me, halter- walks into the hallway. me home. A mask of Ciclope that was topped and fuck-me pumped. She Tercero Caida belongs to her. given to me by the man himself when I whispers in my ear in Spanish. They tell you never to use No as your managed to get backstage in TJ. Have “No habla.” I say, but she safety word, but she made it work. Letter-Graded Mail of the shaft on which the motor spins, Emailed Words of Comment which you have to start spinning Sent to [email protected] again. From the clock I could see From my Gentle Readers the interruption had occurred only three minutes earlier. The VCR in Let’s start off with Mr. Ted White my bedroom recording the 4,5, and 6 who drops us a line due to the holi- o’clock news on Channel 4 was still day! going. The others showed the correct Dear Chris, time and weren’t flashing “auto”. It’s the 4th of July, and I’m at I thought I’d check the progress my home computer, and I just read of the storm on the Channel 9 weather TDT #87. radar loop, which was running on my I did a few LoCs because I had computer. But it wasn’t there -- just the day off too. It’s an American an error message -- and a glance at my tradition! cable modem showed all its lights A line of thundershowers just were out. Worse yet, the little red blew through in the last hour. I had light was on for “diag” on my router. just gone out in my car to do a short Fortunately, unplugging and restoring errand when the first drops began the power for each unit restored both falling. I ended up driving through and I was back on line. sheets of rain and saw a gorgeous You’re lucky. During our wet season lightning flash across the sky on my this year, our Cable went out and way back. Now the sun is out. we had to actually get new units One of the best nights I ever had installed because of some flaw that was playing mini-golf while there heard music. I hadn’t left anything rendered them useless if they lose was a thunderstorm some miles playing, which was a tipoff. My CD power for 24 hours. away (so there was no rain or player, when the power is interrupted, And reading TDT #87. But even clouds overhead) and we saw immediately goes into “play” mode before I get to it, I do want to thank and even managed to photograph when power is restored. So I knew the you for giving my LoC pride of place in a few gorgeous streaks. I hear power had been off in my absence #86. I wasn’t expecting that. the weather out there has been at least momentarily. I wandered ’twas nothing. I usually put my a challenge. Having grown up in around my house checking things. LoCs wherever I am in the process NorCal, I never understand that The Very Old analog electric clock of writing the zine (except for other places get rain during the always stops when there’s a power Claims Department where they go summer. interruption, and has to be started in the end since it’s one continuous But when I walked in the again by hand -- a little knob sticking piece). This issue, they’re stuck in door of my house upon my return, I out its back which is actually the end the middle, so I thought I’d give them a couple of illustrations to I’ve never gotten that far, but a few I know, that hasn’t happened, and in draw the eye a bit more. years ago -- around five, by now the interim my nifty title, Cars, has I’m glad to see you running for -- I got hooked into a movie project of been used on another movie (which TAFF, and I offer you my support (and sorts. I was introduced to a man I’ll I saw a couple of weeks ago; I’m a vote). I think of all those currently call Jay. Jay had a story of sorts. He sucker for any movie which features a active in fandom, you’re the best choice was one of a group of hippies just out ’51 Hudson Hornet). right now. You’re obviously riding of college who started refurbishing I still haven’t seen Cars, but we’re a wave of fanac, and I have no idea VW bugs for resale and graduated to getting a DVD and a 35mm print whether that wave has crested yet, “gray market” imported autos. This for the museum’s collections. Pixar but you are riding high these days. was a ‘70s thing which climaxed in the always takes care of us. As for the Inevitably your fanac will slow at some ‘80s with NEWSWEEK featuring his movie, it sounds interesting. I’ve point, or your interests will shift away company on its cover. Jay wanted his made a couple of movies, all for from fanac, but right now you’re hot. “story” turned into a real story, a movie the Fest circuit though I worked on So, to quote Charlie Parker, now’s the treatment, and he was willing to pay one that had Euro distribution, and time. for it. So I came up with a real story, it’s a beast. Frank’s a brave man, I Wow, thanks for the endorsement. wrote the treatment, and turned it could never go into that world. I’m It’s been quite thrilling to hear over to Jay for him to sell it. As far as just not strong enough. folks ‘Good for you. You’ve got my Moving on to John Purcell’s vote’. Even the sceptics have all letter, you say you “never got into the been at least somewhat positive. bheer.” Neither did I. I tried. I As for my level of FANAC, yeah, really did. As a teenager I’d get a bottle It’ll peak at some point and slow of beer with my peers, sitting out on down. I’m thinking I’ve got another the end of a pier in Colonial Beach, year or so of TDT being weekly. SF/ Virginia, in the summer evening. The SF’s been a well-oiled machine of waterline was the division between late, so that’s easy. My LoCing and the states of Virginia and Maryland, doing articles hasn’t really gotten and the pier, although anchored to tough yet, but I can tell when I start Virginia, was itself in Maryland, in a something new (like another movie county which allowed slot machines. or a new relationship) I’ll probably So people came to play the slots, drink start to grind a bit. That’s one of beer, and punch up favorites on the the reasons I wanted to run, hit jukebox. (Decades later Maryland while there’s still a lot in the tank. outlawed slots and I guess the pier Frank Wu’s piece was lost its popularity, but I haven’t been fascinating, mostly for its behind-the- back there since the mid-’50s.) I was scenes look at a corner pocket of the underage -- we all were -- but no one film industry -- the promotion. seemed to care. And I struggled with that bottle of beer. at all. It does make their private life and are a member That pier sounds like sense though. There of the Religious Right, neither of my kind of place. Of is one beer that I can which I can be accused of. But I course, having grown get into. It’s a Belgian must admit, I do like the current up when I did, all of Lambic which is so tax plans... those little things heavily bitter that I don’t know “M” but I’m sorry were gone. When I was it requires fruiting, to hear about her medical problems studying the history so that add banana and I hope things improve for her. of the Amusement and it’s fairly good No new mother should have to deal Park industry, I insomuch as I can with medical problems on top of new mapped the types drink it. When I go twins -- who will be a handful all by of rides available to with my beer-drinker themselves. the notable lawsuits friends, I usually have Yeah, she was very broken up. against parks. By one forced on me. Judith and SaBean went to stay 1974, the rides that Still with John’s with her and are helping with the sounds like the letter, I must say that I babies. Chris, the bigger one, is most fun were all don’t find Ann Coulter doing really well, while Guy isn’t gone, including the physically attractive. nearly as big, but he’s doing OK. awesome Horse Race Too skinny, with a too- M made it through the surgery to ride. prominent adam’s apple. remove the growth, and another My problem And her mind/ smaller one as well, but they only was the taste of personality is had to remove one of her ovaries beer. I never got into poisonous. She’s one of too. it (although I will cook those sociopaths who’s All best, with beer). I think it’s learned how to channel Ted the hops. In any event, I suffered a it profitably. But in the ‘30s she’d have Thanks Much, Ted! and now SaBean Deprived Childhood because I couldn’t been a devoted member of the Hitler MoreL talks a little about Mexico enjoy beer. These days I listen to my Youth movement. Most of the NeoCons and M and The Twins and Sex and friends discussing different beers - would have been. Drugs and The Drink Tank and - some of them homebrew their own She wasn’t as skinny as she looked Everything Else. It’s kind of an LoC, -- and it’s all academic to me. To me on the recent cover of Time when I so I’ll put it here it all tastes like horse piss. But I can saw her. She’s just plain evil, that’s You’re doing an issue about discuss hops. Did you know hops true. I’ve been called a NeoCon by Mexico. Good for you. I’m sitting in are the closest botanical relative to many over the years. I usually refer M’s house watching Little Chris sleep. marijuana? Or that it’s the hops’ to myself as a Fiscal Conservative. M’s in bed. Jay’s in the kitchen eat- buds which are used in beer-making? NeoCon to me implies that you give ing soup. Judith and I were sitting in I didn’t know they were related a damn about what people do with the nursery talking, but she got tired and went over to the daybed and is send me to my works, but it’s hard napping. Mike and Kath left for the to not want something to make the store an hour ago. The nurse is work- worry go away. I moved all the booze to ing on preparations in the other room. one of the safes. I gave the key to one I just got off the phone with Manny. of the nurses. That’ll keep us out of He’s worried about everything and he there. should be, but I convinced him that And why am I writing all of this everything will be fine. This is the clos- here? Because The Drink Tank is like est I’ve been to alone in ten days. I’m home to us now. It’s the place where enjoying it. I finally get a chance to we talk about all the little crap we’ve check my email and there’s your call been through, all the big crap we’re go- for stories about Mexico. ing through and all the things we want Mexico. Mexico. I’ve been to Mex- to find in the future. It’s hard to figure, ico, a few times. Really, lots of times. but we never see Chris or Manny, and Used to have a connection that could when M and Jay are in Finland we score me whatever I wanted with no never hear from them either. This is notice. A phone call and it was at my our place, our home. hotel room ten minutes later. It’s get- Little Chris just woke up. He ting hard to talk about that shit now. likes it when you put your finger be- I’m sitting in a room with two babies hind his knee. He does this leg thing under constant care, there are nurses where he’s trying to close it around here twenty-four hours a day and I your finger. It’s one of those things can’t rally enough of that old numb- that babies do. He likes me, I can tell. much for us being the hardest of the ness to talk about those days again. He never cries as loud when it’s just hard core. That’s been happening a lot lately. My me as he does when Judith or Jay are I’m scared. When was the last life’s changed. M says I’m becoming around. time I admitted that? Maybe the days Auntie SaBean. I probably am. I’m hoping that M will get better leading up to the accident which led Jay and M were in bed together soon. She doesn’t get to spend much to me kicking. Maybe the day my Dad last night. M was crying, loud enough time with the twins, mostly just when told us he knew he wouldn’t make it to hear at my rocking chair in the she’s feeding them. She walks over another week. Maybe the time I went in nursery. She’s been doing that a lot once in a while and will sit in the rock- for an AIDS test and it was inconclu- lately and no one blames her in the ing chair for a while, stare at Chris sive (and turned out negative). There’s least. I’ve been crying too. And Judith. and Guy, talks to them. Jay’s been so no question that things are insane And Jay. And the two adorable little busy taking care of M’s medical stuff right now, with M’s surgery and the kids in their trays. And Jay’s Mom. that he usually only spends the over- twins, it’s not easy to keep from fall- And My Mom. And Kath. And Mike. night shift with the kids. He’ll walk in ing into something stupid. I’m over the And Chris, from what I understand. So a little later and I’ll give him the chair H phase, when any little bump would and he’ll stay in it until he falls asleep. dropped off myself for an hour or two. M and I were talking this morn- Mexico. ing. She said she missed the days I remember my dad had a book when the worst that happened was a of Mexican folk tales and there was misplaced fuck leading to one of us not the one about the Ghost woman whose talking to the other for a month. I miss children were drowned and she wept those days, though I’m glad were not forever. That story scared the shit out that stupid anymore. We talked about of me as a child. So did the one about the times we used to fuck around. It the ghost highway bandits. Dad tried wasn’t that long ago, I can still remem- to convince me that they were just like ber the times the two of us would get the ones from the Haunted Mansion back from class or work and she’d be ride at Disneyland. it didn’t work. naked and I’d be hers all afternoon. M M and I used to talk about going was looking better than she had since off to Ixapa and playing on the beach. she had the twins. I kissed her for a Jay would go off and catch a Marlin or minute or so and she smiled. I hadn’t something else and M and I would be kissed her like that in a long time. Jay on the beach, drunk and lazy, waiting came in a few minutes later. for him to return and take us to din- “You missed it, we were just ner and then back to the room for the making out.” M said. Good Old Days. Those were the kinds Jay looked pleased for the first of things I used to wish for. time in a week. That and a fast fix. “Good, just make sure you save I want M to get better. Judith’s a little for me once this thing’s over.” quit her job, and since M’s said she’s and he came over and gave M and me a gonna stay in New York for at least a big wet kiss each. It had been an even year, we’re all going to be living here. longer time since we’d kissed. Jay’s Mike and Kath’ll stay off and on, but always been so good about M’s sexual they’ll come up on weekends. It’ll be a needs. After the first couple of times he crowded house, but there are six bed- blew up about it, he started to under- rooms, three studies, a library, two stand. I’m glad. dinning rooms, two kitchens, a living Later, around noon, I took M room, three floors and the Nursery. to bed, made sure she got her nurse We’ve got plenty of sleeping room, even to give the meds and I held her until if the Nurses and techs were live-in. she fell asleep, got up and sat in the You could come, Chris, wouldn’t even chair across the room. listened to her need to get a motel room. breathing while she slept and then If Judith and I hadn’t patched things up, there’d be no way this would clear of the drug cart. They’ve spent work. I spent a couple of hours just a lot of money to make it happen (the sitting with her while she let out eve- doctor alone set her back several hun- rything right when she first got here. dred grand) but she’s got the money, is It was harder on her than anyone. She comfortable and she can be surround- can’t have kids herself anymore, or so ed by her family. they tell her, so M’s were sort of her That’s what we all are now: fam- last chance. That’s a rough diagno- ily. You’re family too. You should come sis, but it’s probably true. She spends out and visit more. We all miss you, more time with Guy and Chris than I Chris. M asked me what it would take do, and that’s even with her new guy to get you out here. I said she’d need to around. build a bullet train from San Francisco Judith’s been writing. I always to New York. I think she started pricing know when things are tough for her out ways to make it happen. because she starts writing and can’t I want to be able to tell you some seem to stop. She kept me up until Mexico stories, but I don’t know if I feel almost two am the other night with her up to them. I could tell the one about scribbling. She’s filled a full notebook. how I crossed the border and helped This time, I’m not reading them. I can’t three people who really wanted in to bring myself to invade her privacy like the US bad get through the desert. I I did when we were young. I used to be could spend an hour writing about the such a bitch. time I went down on a dealer for his I was reading the latest issues good personal stuff, not the shit that of The Drink Tank. They’re fun. A lot I was shooting at that point. I could lighter than the one about our Dads tell you the story of my last trip in to dying. I’m not sure why, but I think Nuevo Loredo, when Lisa and I slept that there’s going to be a time when was still partially sedated. naked on the roof of some guy’s house you can’t do it anymore. You’ll run out This house is amazing. M’s got a until we woke up to find three guys of art, you’ll run out of writers, you’ll medical staff of five: a doctor and four staring at us, ready to have their way. run out of time. I really don’t want that nurses, one which looks after her and There are all sorts of stories but I just to happen. three for the kids. The doctor is a pri- can’t tell them now. I printed out a couple of issues vate-practice guy who gets hired out I’m looking at a baby who’s less for M and Jay. They both appreciated for six and eight months at a time. than six pounds and I’m wondering if it and M was laughing just about an I think he’s cute too. he’ll have some deep memory of the hour after they brought her into the The third floor, where M and the words that I type here encoded into bedroom. I guess that’s the best reac- kids are, are all medicalled out. There that darkest part of his brain. I won- tion you could get from a woman who are hospital beds and incubators and der if he’ll end up a junky because his monitors and a drug cart. I’ve kept ‘Aunt’ wrote stories about shooting up any of us to make us realize that we’ll articles, but that’s OK. You usually and having sex and trading one for the make it through all of this. You’d make manage to make things better. other. I wonder if they’ll be into edge- all those inappropriate comments and SaBean, this is the longest LoC I’ve play because I wrote about the times we’d hit you but still laugh. That’s ever printed. I wish I could have that I went over the edge. I’ll never be what we need right now. been out there, but you know how sure, so I just won’t write it. I don’t Judith just woke up. I think things go. I was so glad I got to talk want to be that long-time family friend she managed to get two hours sleep. to you and M and Judith last night. who is sweet as sugar and you never I think that’s how long I’ve been typ- I swear I could hear Jay snoring in suspect of having done anything in ing. She’s sitting with Guy and M’s the background. their life until your parents let it slip with Chris. I’m going to get some sleep I’ll be going with Manny to a one afternoon. That’s the worst thing I soon. My official bedroom is on the game night in a couple of weeks, could imagine. second floor. It’s next to Judith’s. I’ve so we’ll probably talk about how M’s up. The nurse is walking her only slept in there one night, that first we’re going to get all of you out to into the nursery. She’s been crying. night, before M even came home from WorldCon. It’s six weeks away and Quietly crying for once. She still looks the hospital. I’ve slept in stints on the you know you wanna go. good. Bless M for that. She even put on daybed in the nursery mostly. Judith And it’s OK that you don’t make-up this morning. The only rea- slept in her bed once too. She slept want to share more of those kinds son I know that is the mascara that’s cuddled up next to M the other night of stories. There does come a point running down her face. and one night in Jay’s bed while he where it all kinda has to shuffle I’m tired. I’m scared. I wish you held M in her bed all night. There’s lots away for a while. It looks like it’s were here, Chris. I’d love to have the of bed-hopping going on, but oh-so-lit- kicked in. rock who is far more emotional than tle sex. I think that kiss was the most I’m still tickled that Little action this house has seen. Chris is named after me! And I I’m in my bedroom, the lap- love the fact that he’s Little Chris, top’s plugged in and I’m ready meaning that I’m big Chris. LC and to get my sleep. I’m gonna call BC. I hope y’all know I’m going to Mom in the morning. Then I’ll marry him off to my cousin’s kid order some Chinese food from Diana. That’ll cement everything. Yun-Sang. God, it’s almost Take care of everything, your- five. I need some sleep. By the self most of all. I’ll keep close, and time I wake up, it’ll be time who knows, maybe later this year for M’s series again. She gets I’m come out and see the place. It grumpy right after that. sounds like a secret government Sorry I couldn’t write headquarters. And with all that more about Mexico, but you bed-hopping, who knows what hilar- can use this, I’m sure. You’ll ious misunderstandings could hap- chop it up like you do all our pen. Who’s Judith’s new guy? Though I am writing a lot about while and nothing happened for almost Mexico, I haven’t been there in years a year. At that point, a much nicer and I’ve never stayed long. I went to a hotel owned by another Gringo opened few wrestling shows, I went to TJ, and up. He was happily paying bribes left when I was a kid I got separated from and right and they were over-looking my parents and my Dad had to bribe a violations and standards left and right. cop to get me back. That’s how things They eventually closed down the guy’s go. Mexico is far from the most corrupt Best Western because they claimed the country on Earth, several African na- food the coffee shoppe was serving had tions have that honor, and Guatemala given three people food poisoning and and Honduras both have a stake, but that was enough to close a hotel...if in Mexico it’s done very differently. they didn’t pay up the proper amounts. There are levels of bribes that are Even in my beloved Lucha there required to make anything happen. If is graft. They regulate things tightly. you want the police to help you, think You have to provide a photo of yourself of it as a tip, and usually they’ll help unmasked to get a licence. If you are you out before they make you pay. The a masked wrestler, you must register. way my folks got me back is a perfect Then, if you ever lost your mask, you’re example. The amount can usually be required to register that you lost it tiny, something like two bucks can and may never compete under a mask often work. Sometimes it’s more. You again...unless you pay the proper get your car stolen and you decide to bribe. The Commission is theoretically go the police route (and there are sto- unpaid, though they all live like Kings. ries that they will regularly steal cars) Mexico City is well-known for that, as Movies may pay more than any you’ll probably have to pony up about are most of the big areas. other group. There are bribes required a hundred bucks, and that guarantees If you’re an international group, for everything from hiring technicians almost nothing. expect bigger payments. I remember (much like in the US where they call it The next step is Governmental. hearing an NPR story about a guy Union-Use fees) to paying actors (SAG), For locals, there are tiny bribes all who opened up a Best Western in one to getting beyond the censors (much the time to the various commissions. of the beach resort towns. It was do- like trying to get a favourable rating If you’re a store owner, expect several ing good business and he was sup- from the MPAA) to getting on screens. hundred dollars a month to go to the porting a small army in the bribes he It all takes cash, and they require police, zoning and competition agen- knew he had to pay to the police and goodly sums for each step. cies and various other groups that re- to the commissions. They kept raising If you want to make a living off quire a hand out from each and every his rates, saying that there were new of Mexico, get the right people in your establishment. There are some areas things that came to light and he had pocket fast. It’ll not only make your life where it doesn’t happen much, but to reimburse them for not letting them easier, you’ll also be helping supplement get to him. He refused to pay after a the local economy. The Legendary El Santo...Sort of Then, my music would play. cradle, and then I’d give him the sec- When I was a kid, and I’m talk- It would nearly be as much of a ond fall fast, simply to build the dra- ing seven or eight here, I wanted to be riot. There’d be people throwing flow- ma. The third fall would be me getting a wrestler more than anything. I grew ers (everyone threw flowers at El Santo) beat around, maybe even bloodied and out of it: by 12 I wanted to be a ring and streamers, kids would run up to then I’d reverse his attempt at La Mar- announcer and by 14 I wanted to be a try and touch my hands. People would tinette, the most dangerous move in promoter, but that dream of wanting to be chanting. ‘San-to! San-to’ and the Lucha Libre, and end up with my own be a wrestler stuck with me. old ladies who always sit in the front Camel Clutch for the win. The place I did a few shows with my Emer- row would be clapping and smiling. would go nuts, with horns and bells son friends when I was living in Bos- Then the match would start and and cheering. I’d have the belt handed ton. I played Mr. Fabulous, a guy wres- everything would take off. I’d win the to me and I’d show it off to each coner tling in a suit who would dance after first fall with La Majistral, the rolling of the arena. his matches. I wasn’t very good, but I When I wrestled during college, did invent a wrestling move that would I loved my gimmick, but I wanted to go on to be made famous by Bill Gold- do more. I drew up my plan on a nap- berg. kin, like all good ideas, and showed it But as a kid, I wanted to be El around. It was simple, I’d go down to Santo. I wanted to become Enmas- Mexico, live like Ultimo Dragon and carado del Plata. I really wanted to Jushin Liger for a year learning, going be the man who was worshipped in to shows and trying to get backstage. Mexico as Hulk Hogan meets Arnold I’d finally meet the right person and Schwartzenegger. I had the idea in my end up on a show. After a while, I’d mind from the minute I saw his mov- debut my new character- ies. I never understood a word they El Santo Nuevo: The New Saint. were saying, but I loved them no mat- You see, I’d pretend like I was a ter. face, but in Mexico there is no bigger So, when I was a kid, thinking face than Hijo del Santo. He’d chal- on the swing at the little park in the lenge me and there’d be talk of law- middle of my complex, I would think of suits, but we’d have a match, at Triple- all the pageantry and magic that would Mania, the Mexican WresleMania, and happen when I came to the ring. My it would be Mascara contra Mascara, opponent would enter first, whistles, his mask vs. mine, and I’d lose and and people throwing beer bottles at be forced to take it off and declare my him. He’d almost start a riot by merely real name. Then I’d rip the Santo tradi- showing his face to take me on. Then tion and that’d lead to a Hair vs. Mask he’d get in the ring and taunt the fans match. That was my dream. some more. If only I’d learned how to wrestle. There are serious things about white folks. My Aunt Sherry and Uncle being a half-breed that a lot of folks Carl and My Aunt Gwen and her hus- don’t talk about. There’s a lot of hand- band (until he died) lasted a good long waving that we’re “A Powerful block” while each. In fact, Carl and Sherry are of people. I know a few dozen half- still together. Mexicans. Most of us are half-Anglo Is this endemic of mixed mar- and Half-Mexican and all of us identify riages? I don’t think so. There are ourselves as Mexican and not Hispanic certain truths about Hispanic men that nor Chicano (though I sometimes will most folks laugh at but are certainly say Chicano because my Pops always true (at least in the limited sample set said Chicano). It’s strange that no one of all the Hispanic men I know). That has really come courting us yet as a does not seem to have been passed possible influence. down though. All of my half-Mexican I wrote an article ages back friends are from divorced families (or in about how Classy Freddie Blassie was one case, extremely long-term separ- the dividing point. One generation of ated) and that sort of shows in the way Mexicans reacted one way to Fred- they approach relationships. None of die and the next reacted another way. them have married, none of them have I did a lot of research and there was had kids, all of them are 30+. a strange statistic that didn’t make So, does this mean that we it into the article. The percentage of should only marry our own races? full-blooded Chicano births steadily Well, who knows? There are prob- declined between 1945 and 1980. Sup- ably tons of examples that contradict posedly, and UCLA could easily have cept for my aunt Naomi. She married my experiences, I’m betting you could gotten all of this wrong, before 1940, a Puerto Rican guy, but her first two probably name a couple off the top of 85% of all marriages with at least one baby daddies were both white guys. Of your head, but there’s certainly truth Chicano involved were between a pair my cousins, only one would qualify as to some of the things I say. of Chicanos. By 1980, that number all-Hispanic, and she’s got a kid who is The thing is there’s no unified had dropped to less than 40%. In fact, half! reason why these things have hap- the only two races that still main- On my Mom’s side, there’s a lot pened. While adultery is certainly one tain 50% plus are Whites and Asians, of bitterness. My Mom married my reason, there’ve also been money is- though those numbers are quite old Dad, and that didn’t go well (produc- sues, marital difficulties, jail time, and and it’s likely that both have changed. ing one Halfling). Her sister, Susie, a full range of things. The same rea- From my personal experience, I she married a guy named Val and they sons that all marriages break-up. can say that my family on both sides ended up getting divorced too. Two of So I don’t have any idea if there’ll married the opposite direction. My my cousins both have failed marriages ever be a Half-Mexican revolution, but Dad’s side all married white girls, ex- to Mexican guys. The only lasting mar- if there ever is, I want to be the leader. riages in my family have been between should ever cross paths, he’d give me friends. I’d the story of him and Arnie winning love to hear a mini-golf tournament back in the any rich day. The last time I heard from him brown sto- was after a post I made somewhere ries anyone about looking for articles. He said he might have. couldn’t help me out, but pointed me The only one in a couple of different directions. I have he I believe rich had two LoCs in wasn’t even The Drink Tank, including on about present for. Hecto that actually got me think- I was work- ing about starting a HectoZine. I can ing on a zine remember a number of posts on a with a friend number of lists from rich and I’ll miss and rich’s name came up. I spelt it those. His were usually some of the with no caps, as he preferred, and they most interesting. had fixed it. rich brown aka Dr. GAFIA I wish I’d got to meet him. My “Why did you Cap those?” I I never got to meet him. That’s sympathies to his family and to his what saddens me the most. A lot of the asked. good folks I’ve met over the last few “It’s a name isn’t it? All names years knew him well and I’m certain are capitalized.” they’re all seriously broken right now I thought for a moment. with rich’s passing. Sadly, from the “Well, in this case, just think of emails that’ve been going around, his a description of good gravy and let it condition was much like my father’s slide. I mentioned that to rich in one of the last couple of weeks of his life. the last emails we exchanged and his That’s a shame. response was ‘Well, at least I’m good Though I never met him, I did ex- gravy.’ change a few emails with the man. The The Drink Tank Issue 88 was written by first stemmed from an article I did in Christopher J. Garcia, Ted White, Judith one of the very first Drink Tanks where Morel, SaBean MoreL, and others. It’s on I criticized him for an article that ap- eFanzines.com thanks to the goodness of Bill peared in eI about his feud with Cheryl Burns. [email protected] for LoCs Morgan. He sent a response which I and article submissions. thought was quite fair and I ran in a Issue 100 will be the 100 writers issue, so if following issue. He sent me a couple of you’ve got an inkling, even if it’s just to say more emails a while later, very friendly Congrats, drop it my way! they were, and he even said that if we