Optimism, Gratitude, Compassion, Hope

Tony Picchioni, PhD Southern Methodist University Baylor University Medical Center Optimism

Compassion Gratitude

Hope Tony Picchioni, PhD Southern Methodist University Baylor University Medical Center I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it. Maya Angelou The Science of Optimism

• Which of the following sentences best describe you? 1. In uncertain times, I usually expect the best.” 2. If something can go wrong for me, it will.

• Optimistic people (see #1) tend to have … • Higher well-being • Better health • More success in professional and private life What is optimism?

Expecting good things to Even when faced with setbacks ultimately happen … An optimistic outlook depends on …

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Seeing the challenge as Seeing the challenge as specific, temporary, not permanent not global Better mental health …

• Comes from “approach coping,” that is, engaging the problem • Not “avoidance coping,” that is, denying the problem Optimists are:

• Confident • Increased creativity • Persistent • Reduced anxiety • Sleep well • Lower risk of heart attack Which results in … • Less risk of heart disease • Lower blood pressure • Longer life • Higher satisfaction in life Optimism can be learned Optimism can be learned - Strategy 1: CBT

A. Activating event B. Believe the good that we tell ourselves about the event C. Consequence D. Dispute irrational thinking with rational thinking E. Effective change is the result Optimism can be learned - Strategy 2: Imagining the future

• Imagine yourself in a successful future • Write about yourself in that future

Writing about personal success increases one’s level of optimism. Gratitude …

• Allows people to connect to something bigger • Acknowledges the goodness in one’s life • Unites us with others • Is contagious Gratitude changes your brain

We feel good when we give, Our brains are which is followed wired for gratitude by a longer period of emotional well- being

Giving makes us feel better about To improve your ourselves, which mood, give to produces a someone else positive outlook People who are more caring have a greater sense of meaning. Connections and relationships are keys to meaning. Questions to prompt gratitude:

• Who do I appreciate? • In what ways am I fortunate? • What possessions am I thankful for? • What abilities am I grateful for? • What experiences am I grateful for? • What happened today that I am grateful for? • What relationships am I grateful for? • What insights am I learning from this experience that I am grateful for? Compassion Instead of putting others in their place, put yourself in their place.

Amish Proverb All the major religions place great importance on compassion. Whether it’s the parable of the Good Samaritan in Christianity, Judaism’s Thirteen Attributes of Compassion, or the Buddha’s statement that “loving kindness and compassion is all in our practice,” empathy with the suffering of others is seen as a special virtue that has the power to change the world. Qualities of Compassion: • Patience • Wisdom • Kindness • Perseverance • Warmth • Empathy • Care Commonalities generate empathy

When we draw an Experiences of compassion association between a toward another shape our victim and ourselves—even actions toward others. a trivial one—the compassion we feel for that person is greatly magnified. Elevation

Seeing someone help another Leaders who care for others elicit person creates “elevation.” “elevation” in their employees. This influences their employees to act with compassion in the work place. Self-compassion …

… is a process of self-kindness and accepting suffering as a quality of the human condition. Three activities that thwart self-compassion:

SELF-CRITICISM SELF-ISOLATION SELF-ABSORPIOIN Self-compassion includes noticing, caring, and responding to one’s own needs …

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Valuing yourself Monitoring your Reaching out for Seeking thoughts support feedback and validation Hope

• Human behavior is driven by goals. • Setting and working toward goals increases our happiness and sense of purpose. • Goals motivate us, giving us direction. • Achieving a goal brings a sense accomplishment and satisfaction. • Hope comes from both having goals and believing you can achieve them. • Hopeful people believe the future will be better because they can set and achieve goals that will make it so. For hope to flourish …

Goals

Agency Pathways Steps to build hope

Set See Know

Set a goal for a better See yourself as able to Know that there are future • Break goals into sub-goals many paths to • Identify the steps needed to accomplishing a goal and achieve sub-goals and goals all paths contain obstacles Optimism How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world. Anne Frank Gratitude Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy/ they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. Marcel Proust Compassion People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. Maya Angelou Hope We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope. Martin Luther King