The Jealousy Complex Between Young Siblings and Its Relations with Child and Family Characteristics

Child Development, March/April 2002, Volume 73, Number 2, Pages 581–600 Emotion Regulation in Context: The Jealousy Complex between Young Siblings and Its Relations with Child and Family Characteristics Brenda L. Volling, Nancy L. McElwain, and Alison L. Miller Jealousy is a social emotion that has received little attention by developmental researchers. The current study examined sibling jealousy and its relations to child and family characteristics in 60 families with a 16-month- old toddler and an older preschool-age sibling. Sibling jealousy was elicited in social triads consisting of a parent (mother or father) and the two siblings. Positive marital relationship quality (i.e., love and relationship maintenance) was a particularly strong predictor of the older siblings’ abilities to regulate jealousy reactions in the mother sessions. Younger siblings’ jealous affect with mothers was linked to the child’s temperament, whereas older siblings’ jealous affect with mothers was related to the child’s emotional understanding. Younger siblings displayed more behavioral dysregulation in the mother–sibling triads if there was greater sibling rivalry reported by mothers. Session order (i.e., which sibling was challenged first in the jealousy paradigm) had a strong effect on both the affect and behavioral dysregulation displayed by the older and younger siblings. Results are discussed with respect to the need for future research to consider social relationships as developmental contexts for young children’s emotion regulation. INTRODUCTION personal regulation, certain complex emotions, such Emotion regulation has recently received a great deal as jealousy, cannot be understood nor even defined of attention by developmental and clinical scholars. without reference to the interpersonal context. In the Acquiring emotional control and managing one’s present article, we argue that studying jealousy be- emotions in social situations is considered a central tween young siblings provides a window on early developmental task of early childhood (Kopp, 1989; emotion regulation within the context of family rela- Sroufe, 1996; Thompson, 1994); yet, as Thompson tionships. The study of sibling jealousy underscores (1994) has noted, the concept of emotion regulation is the contextual sensitivity of certain emotional reac- still “in search of definition,” and various definitions of tions, as well as the complexity of family dynamics in emotion regulation can be found (e.g., Cole, Michel, & contributing to and explaining emotional expression Teti, 1994; Garber & Dodge, 1991). Thompson (1994, and its regulation. p. 28) offered the following definition: “Emotion regulation consists of the extrinsic and intrinsic processes What Is Jealousy? responsible for monitoring, evaluating, and modify- ing emotional reactions, especially their intensive and Jealousy is a complex social emotion, unlike the ba- temporal features, to accomplish one’s goals.” Even sic emotions of anger, fear, sadness, and joy. Jealousy though this definition, like others, underscores both has been studied predominantly by social psycholo- internal and external processes, Campos, Mumme, gists within the context of adult romantic relation- Kermoian, and Campos (1994) pointed out that current ships (see Salovey, 1991) and is not an emotion that empirical work that examines emotion regulation tends has garnered the attention of most developmental or to focus on emotion regulation as an intrapersonal pro- family researchers. This is rather unfortunate given cess and rarely considers the contextual factors that that concerns about childhood jealousy, often seen as may contribute to regulation strategies. According to sibling rivalry, surface frequently in clinical and pediat- Campos et al. (1994, p. 298), “no treatment of emotion ric texts (DelGuidice, 1986; Griffin & De La Torre, 1985; regulation from a functionalist perspective can avoid Leung & Robson, 1991; Neubauer, 1983; Pietropinto, discussion of the social context that elicited the need 1985), as well as in dozens of books offering childrear- for regulation in the first place and that specifies the ing advice to parents (e.g., Bode, 1991; Faber & Maz- rules of proper conduct.” The purpose of the present lish, 1998; Goldenthal, 1999). As with most emerging report was to expand on the study of emotion regula- disciplines, research on romantic jealousy is littered tion by examining the social emotion of jealousy and with controversy concerning the conceptualization, its regulation in early childhood. Even though the predominant model of much of © 2002 by the Society for Research in Child Development, Inc. current emotion regulation research focuses on intra- All rights reserved. 0009-3920/2002/7302-0016 582 Child Development measurement, and causes of jealousy, and debates her attention from them and interacts with their have erupted over the distinction between jealousy brother or sister. and envy; whether jealousy is a simple, complex, or The definition of jealousy and the theoretical blended emotion; and whether it is caused by threats framework guiding the current work is based on the to self-esteem or threats to a valued relationship (for original model of romantic jealousy proposed by reviews of this literature, see Salovey, 1991; White and White and Mullen (1989, p. 1): “. jealousy is neither Mullen, 1989). Although different definitions have an emotion, nor merely a state of mind, still less a way been formulated based on different theoretical orien- of behaving. Rather, we believe it is more useful to tations, the important point to be stressed for devel- think of jealousy as particular patterns of emotions, opmental researchers interested in the study of emo- thoughts, and actions that emerge in particular social tion is that jealousy absolutely cannot be defined nor and psychological situations.” Jealousy, then, is an or- understood without reference to the social context. ganized complex of emotions, cognitions, and behav- Regardless of theoretical orientation, one distinguish- iors following the threat to or loss of a beloved rela- ing characteristic has continued to be underscored by tionship to a rival. In the world of siblings, the all jealousy theorists: jealousy occurs in the context of beloved is one’s parent and the rival is one’s sibling. a social triangle. It should be noted, however, that the Consistent with White and Mullen (1989), we use triangle may not always involve a third person, as in the term jealousy complex to underscore this notion the case of a woman who is jealous of her husband’s that jealousy is a complex of interrelated affects, be- love of golf. “What is always true is that jealousy in- haviors, and cognitions organized within a specific volves a triangle of relations” (Parrott, 1991, p. 16). social context (for a similar discussion on the organi- The present study focused on the social triangle, zation of emotion, see Averill, 1997). In any jealousy- given our interest in sibling jealousy. inducing situation, there may be several possible jeal- White and Mullen (1989) have referred to the “in- ousy complexes, and different complexes may be terpersonal jealousy system” to describe the system seen in different social triangles. Thus, there is no sin- of relationships between the three participants of the gle complex of behaviors, emotions, or cognitions social triangle. There are three dyadic relationships that would constitute the jealousy response. For exam- within the triangle in addition to the triadic relation- ple, one complex may include a cognitive appraisal of ship system: (1) the relationship between the jealous potentially losing the relationship to another, the emo- individual and the beloved (the primary or jealous re- tional expression of sadness, and behavioral with- lationship), (2) the relationship between the beloved drawal from the beloved; whereas another complex and the rival (the secondary or rival relationship), might include a cognitive appraisal of the partner’s and (3) the relationship between the jealous individ- betrayal, the emotional expression of anger, and ag- ual and the rival (the adverse relationship). Several gression against the partner as a behavioral response. criteria need to be satisfied for the emotion of jealousy The current research sought to examine the interrela- to be elicited. As already mentioned, jealousy occurs tions between expressed emotions and behavioral within a social triangle, yet any three people ran- coping in a laboratory-based jealousy paradigm. Given domly grouped together will not elicit jealousy. Thus, the young age of the children studied, we did not fo- a second requirement is that the relationship between cus on cognitive factors such as primary appraisal the jealous person and the beloved must be a valued processes, because these were well beyond the devel- close relationship. This relationship need not be a opmental level of the young children studied. Observ- love relationship, but often the most powerful jeal- able behaviors and emotional expressions seemed like ousy reactions are observed when a love relationship a more plausible place to begin. is involved (Buss, 2000). Third, jealousy is triggered White and Mullen’s (1989) model is consistent with by the real or perceived loss of this relationship to a current developmental thinking that underscores the rival. The feelings arising from the loss of a love re- organization of behavior, affect, and cognition (Sroufe, lationship due to death or separation would not con- 1996),

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