CLIJ\1B EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER I

"Why did you do it Ma'am?' If he said that one more time I thought I would scream. The

Warrant Officer had been at me for hours. The death had occurred just after midnight and it was now 4.00 a.m. and he had asked the same question about a hundred times. I was already in shock after the traumatic events of the previous evening and now had to defend myself against a murder charge. A murder I never committed.

Earlier that evening, after seeing friends off, Jurie and I came back into the flat and I went straight to the bathroom to brush my teeth. He came into the bathroom and said quite casually "look what I have done". He ripped up his T shirt and as the fibres came out of the wound the blood gushed out like water out of a hosepipe. I then realized he had stabbed himself in the chest with a fish gutting knife. It was horrible. He turned around and collapsed in the passage between the bathroom, bedroom and entrance hall.

The anxiety I felt was all embracing, why was life so complicated? I had not killed anyone. Why would this irritating man not believe me?

What path had my life taken to bring me to this situation?

Life had never been easy for me, except maybe, right at the beginning.

I CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 2

My father was a keen gardener and a fantastic story teller. When I was old enough to understand, he told me he found me on a flower, playing with the butterflies, and that I used to hop from his one finger to the next, until I grew too big.

He called me Helen Happy Heart Honey Pot. I was his chubby, cheerful baby, born after he returned from war service in North Africa.

I had an older sister, Penny, who was born just before Dad went to war. She was only

10 days old when he left. He knew her from the daily snapshots taken by Mom, with a

Brownie Box camera. But I was his little bundle of joy, all his, to love and to hold and to enjoy from day one. Somehow Dad never changed over the years. He was mature looking when we were young, always looking a lot older than Mom, (which he was by eight years) but he still looked exactly the same when he was in his seventies. He had thinning brown hair and blue eyes, and was not very tall, but well built. He had a

"pigeon chest" from being crushed between trucks in a terrible rail accident that took place near Figtree in Southern Rhodesia before he married Mom. He was a quiet, scholarly man, who loved reading and playing Chess.

Mom was a complex character, utterly charming and vivacious when sober, and really venomous when inebriated. Unfortunately she really enjoyed her tipple and had a few friends who joined her in this unhealthy pastime. We used to be scared to bring friends home because we never knew what state she would be in. Sober, she was a real lady and

2 CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN actually lots of fun. She had a mischievious spirit. She once told us that when she and her

3 siblings were all young and single, they belonged to the Mischief Club. This was in the thirties and there were very few cars on the road. They lived in Warmbaths and they would move a vehicle from where it was parked in front of a house to around the comer, causing the owner much consternation when he discovered his car "missing". They would have pancake tossing evenings and musical soirees. Mom played the piano by ear.

She was a very beautiful woman, with auburn hair and blue eyes and a lovely figure. She had style and was always well dressed.

They got married in Mafeking where Dad was stationed. Dad courted Mom for seven years. Their families were farming neighbours just outside of Warmbaths. Dad and his brother used to ride out to visit Mom's family on horseback. After Dad joined the

Railways he used to come back for holidays and weekends. Dad used to court Mom while his brothe Jack visited Auntie Lily. After school, Mom went to stay with her Grandmother in Johannesburg, where she did a Secretarial Course and then worked for the Chamber of

Commerce. During the seven year courtship their engagement was an on off affair as

Mom worked with a colleague who was also madly in love with her. Every time Dad came to visit this man would act so lovelorn in the office that he shed tears all over his blotting paper. Mom's boss would then beg her to cheer him up, so that some work could take place.

Dad played the role of old faithful and had a lot of patience, but eventually he took action. He invited Mom to join him for the weekend at Mafeking. He met her on the station with a friend in tow, marched her into the registry office and with the friend as witness, they were married. Soon after that, Dad was transferred to Nelspruit. That was quite a change for Mom. She was twenty four years old and had spent a carefree childhood in a big happy family, then in her late teenage, early twenty years in her Grandmother's house she lived with three young aunts. They had a large circle of friends and an active social life. Her first home from home in Nelspruit was in a

Boarding House. With Dad away at work, it must have been for her, a lonely existence.

When she frrst came to Nelspruit from Johannesburg Mom wore a hat and gloves to town and people would stop her and ask who was getting married. CHAPTER 3

When I was born Mom went to the same nursing home where my sister Penny was born.

When they brought me to her and told her I was a girl, she exclaimed in a horrified voice

"Oh no, not another girl!" The midwife was rather shocked and asked her why she thought having two daughters was so bad. "It's not me, it's my father" she explained.

"This is the 16th granddaughter born into the family, not a grandson in sight." When I heard this story, I wondered if that had affected Mom's relationship with me. Because

Mom had had Penny all to herself for the four years that Dad was up North, Penny was her Miss Prim, while I was Dad's tomboy. Dad possibly gave me a bit more attention than he did to them. Mom came from a large, gregarious family. She had five sisters and four brothers but Dad was a loner, who preferred his own company, a good book and the chess board. Opposites attract, but I think it was hard on Mom to be married to such a stoic man who worked many long hours and rather spent time with his daughters than socializing.

Dad was a great reader and introduced us to the library at the earliest age possible. Every

Christmas there was a book present from "Father Christmas" in our pile of presents under the tree. Dad made a point of reading these to us, explaining words and concepts of the storief.He took us for walks through the veld, down to the river, and put paper and a pencil in our hands with the instruction to write down everything we saw, with say, an A for Penny and a B for me, while he would cover the rest of the alphabet. Of course he saw a thousand times more than we did, and he would painstakingly point out, explain, spell and generally educate us on every item.

He was a born educator. Later when those walks became impractical we would sit on his bed armed with the inevitable pad and pencil and play games like General

Knowledge, Hangman, Battleships etc. After dinner, we would have a cup of tea or coffee and the quiz would begin. From an early age we knew all about the longest river, the highest mountain, who built the Suez Canal and such trivia.

We were introduced to swimming at an early age and I excelled at it. Inthe summer, months we spent every afternoon from 2.30 to 6.00 p.m. at the local pool. We were suntanned and healthy. The Crocodile lliver just outside of Nelspruit had a beautiful waterfall that tumbled into a whirlpool just below. In the early days the town's electricity was generated from that spot. When I was about twelve years old Dad dared me to swim across the Crocodile lliver. I don't think he thought I would ever do it, but I did. My heart was in my throat, but I was determined not to let him down. He only told me afterwards that there were no crocodiles in that part of the river, despite the name.

My heart swells with pride and love for my Dad, as these memories come pouring back.

Penny was bright academically and I excelled in sport, particularly swimming and diving, and Dad was always there for us, cheering and encouraging all our endeavours.

Uncle Gabe and Dad went to the same school in Pretoria and their friendship lasted their entire lifetime. They worked on the Railways together. When Uncle Gabe, who was a widower, retired as a Driver at the age of fifty five he came to lodge with our family. He was a tall good looking man with light brown hair and blue eyes. He was very supple and could put his hands flat on the floor without bending his knees. He lived well into his CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAJN eighties and even showed my children this feat. An amusing aspect about Uncle Gabe was that he claimed to be verging on sixty when he turned fifty five and when he turned sixty he was verging on seventy. I thought it was only children who wished they were older. Uncle Gabe was one of the few people who owned a car at this time, and often used to bring Dad to the away venues when we were swimming in a Gala

Dad was a great animal lover. We had a cat called Tiger that Dad doted on. Mom was preparing liver one day, when Tiger, who used the kitchen window to enter and exit the house, climbed through into the kitchen. He landed on the table and there was this lovely juicy liver just waiting for him to have a taste. Mom, who was in the pantry, came out and caught him in the act. She gave him a swipe that knocked him off the table, onto the chair and it was a KO. Mom got the fright of her life and tried to bring him round by feeding him the rest of the liver! Mom knew Dad would never have forgiven her if she had killed his cat

Dad also taught Tiger tricks. He would take a bit of minced meat in each hand and stretch out his arms. To our delight and Mom's displeasure, Tiger would climb up Dad's trouser leg and shirt, pulling threads all the way. Tiger would then walk across Dad's arm, gobble up the mince in one hand and precariously turn around. He would make his way back along Dad's arm, over his shoulders and neck, and down the other arm to claim his prize. Then Tiger would hop off with a self satisfied look on his face, as if congratulating himself on a job well done. And Mom would admonish Dad for the ruination of his cloths!

On one occasion, Dad was working the Circus train and was way behind schedule in arriving home. Mom sent me down to the station to find out if the train was in. She was CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN so funny; she said that if train was in I should check to see if Dad had joined the Circus.

The train was late and when Dad finally got home he was not in a good mood. He went to change out of his work clothes and came to show us a huge bruise on his thigh, where he said the "donkey in striped pyjamas' had kicked him.Whilst unloading some of the animals from the trucks, he had a run in with a frisky Zebra. CHAPTER 4

My cousin Jean came to live with us just before our thirteenth birthdays. We were born just 10 days apart. Her Mother and Father were divorced and she and her elder sister lived with her Father while her brother lived with her Mother. Her Father contracted an incurable disease of the lungs and had to go into a sanitarium. Her elder sister, Margaret, matriculated and found ajob and lodgings, but my Uncle had to make arrangements for

Jean. Of course my parents agreed to take her in. Jean and I became really close over the years and did everything together. Penny, being four years older pursued her own interests. A four year difference in age is a big divide in the younger years.

Jean and I built a see-saw in the back yard and spent hours trying to bounce each other off. On a visit to friends of the family who had a farm we rode donkeys that were not very tame. The donkeys were either recalcitrant and wouldn't move, or took off at a speed, unseating us. We had many bruises after these escapades, which we called fun.

It was Christmas holidays and Dad took leave for the first time that I can remember. It was the end of Jean's first year with us and Penny had just matriculated. We were off to

Rhodesia to visit Mom's sisters who lived in Bulawayo. Uncle Gabe was driving us there. It was very exciting as it was the first holiday as a family that we had been on. It was a very long trip. We got to Beit Bridge after hours of travelling_klt took some time for our Passports to be checked at the South African side of the border, then the

Rhodesian side, but finally we were in another country. To our surprise there were no tar roads, just strips of tar in the sand. When a car coming from the front needed to pass, we both had to give way in a cloud of dust. We finally arrived in Bulawayo at Mom's sister,

Auntie Trudy's place. They had a beautiful home on very large grounds. There was also a garden cottage and a caravan on the property, so we were comfortably accommodated.

There was a tennis court on which the older cousins spent many happy hours. My cousins were friends with Julia Painting. She was one of the first surviving victims of a shark attack off Margate on the South Coast of Natal. She lost her arm in that attack.

What an amazing person she was. She played tennis with her one arm and climbed the

Matopas with all of us. Her mother made her the prettiest dresses with a bow on the shoulder of the missing arm and it was so well done that you were hardly aware of it.

We did a lot of sight seeing V.1@1AAlflt te the Matejlas, a fl'l:el:ttltain range ..her e Ceeil

John RfteEles is bttried. There I had an accident when I slipped off one rock into another rock jutting out below and cut my knee quite badly. I had to be taken to the Doctor for stitches. He gave me antibiotics that I was allergic to, and I suffered with a rash and itchy burn for days afterwards. We went on a picnic to the nearby Obi River and I spent most of my time in the water trying to soothe the itch. When we got home Mom and her sisters decided to resort to the old wives remedy of a bath in Epsom salts. Not even that helped. The highlight of our holiday was the Victoria Falls. That was just spectacular.

The rain forest and the cataracts were spellbinding and that mass of surging water was just ;t- awesome. I was fascinated by the monkeys that inhabited the trees around the camping

10 site where we were staying. They were very tame and came and took food out of our hands. Passing through Livingstone we saw the statue of Dr David Livingstone, the great explorer.

10 On the way back from the falls, the Gwayi River was in flood. The car in front of us got over the low level bridge safely, so Uncle Gabe decided he could do the same. Dad got out of the car, but we children and Mom stayed in. We were no sooner on the bridge when the car started floating. The current was moving us towards the edge of the bridge.

Just experiencing the movement of the car and being aware of the direction it was taking was utterly terrifying. Luckily there were many people gathered on both sides of the river and all the men rushed to the rescue and pushed the car out. They averted what could have turned into a tragedy. We were all very shaken up after the event, but had to continue with our journey back to Bulawayo.

Another trip was to the Kharni Ruins. These were built by an unknown tribe centuries before and very little is known about its history. I collected stones and pebbles from every place we visited. Some were smooth and rounded by water in bygone days. Some had streaks of colour in them. They were all different shapes and sizes and I thought they were beautiful when I stashed them in my suitcase.

Rhodesians had the most wonderful life style. Excellent servants saw to their every need, food was reasonably priced and plentiful. Life was leisurely with sport and recreation playing a major part. The weather provided us with sunny days for the entire holiday.

There were lots of high lights on that trip, but one low light. We were all in my Auntie

Lily's sitting room, playing musical chairs. A cousin and I both made a rush for the same chair. She got there just ahead of me and I landed on her lap, together we went right through the plate glass window, chair and all! Auntie Lily was not impressed, but still managed to take it with a smile and forgive us. This happened on a Saturday

11 afternoon and it could only be fixed on the Monday. I felt really bad about the whole incident.

12 We left Rhodesia after enjoying a fantastic holiday. Inthe emotional saying of goodbyes and thank you, I forgot my suitcase. Uncle Larry sent it on by train. Wben Dad collected it at the station, he couldn't get over how heavy it was and when we opened it and he saw the stones he asked me if I really needed to bring Rhodesia back home with me. CHAPTER S

Back home, Jean and I started playing "Toktokkie", which is knocking on someone's door, and then running away and hiding. Usually we hid in a spot from which you could watch the reaction of the person opening the door. We would do this time and time again and I can't remember ever being caught We did have a couple of close shaves though. I remember a few of the times in particular. The houses on the street behind ours were built on an incline and had six or seven steps going up to the front door. One night Jean knocked on the door, only to get the fright of her life when the old man who was sitting on the stoep in the dark, said "Jaaa". She came down those steps three at a time!

Another occasion was when we heard that the neighbour diagonally across the road had bought a gun, but we soon forgot about that It was Jean's turn to knock and as there was a nice big shrub at their gate, she decided that is where she would hide. She knocked and was safely behind the shrub for the second time, when the neighbour's son let off a loud shot with a cap gun. Jean suddenly remembered the gun and came screaming across the road shouting "I'm shot, I'm shot!" After she calmed down and realized she was not shot we laughed so much that we wet our pants. We rarely played 'toktokkie' and ended up with dry knickers.

There was a boarding house around the comer from our home and we decided to try our game there. It was such fun watching all the different people answering the door to nothing. One night a young man got into a rage with the persistent knocking and jumped into his car and chased us down the street and into the bushes at the bottom of the road. We hid behind some trees. There are worms that dangle on a spider web like thread; well I had one of those dangling down my back. That was quite creepy, but I couldn't move less we got caught, and after standing like statues behind the trees, we yet again escaped. We really were lucky.

Our weather was mild in the winter and extremely hot in the summer. Jean couldn't swim when she came to live with us, but she learnt very fast. We were in the school swimming team and practiced every afternoon. The Lowveld Swimming Club, to which we belonged, had practices three nights a week. We participated in Galas in the towns and villages all around us.

Generally, I hated school. The subjects I found boring. The only thing I enjoyed was being on the swimming team. We were five girls in the Science Class. None of us were stars. One day the teacher who, because of his big ears, was nicknamed Wingnut, asked us what we intended to be when once we had left school. He had just marked a test paper that none of us passed. We all gave our answers and the last one was Vanessa, who said she wanted to be a nurse. He said "Let us pray." We thought he was joking and burst out laughing. He was being deadly serious and consequently kicked us out of the classroom! To enjoy a midnight swim we would take a short cut through the yard of the neighbour behind us. The pool was a block away and was protected from the street by a hibiscus hedge. There was a wooden gate in the hedge, which we climbed over. We had to swim breast stroke so as not to make a noise as sound carries at night.

These excursions continued all through the years. Initially we would exit the house by climbing out of our bedroom window. The window had a gauze mosquito screen that we used to lift during the day, in anticipation of the nights escapade. Then we realized that this was unnecessary as we had an outside toilet, which meant the back door was rarely locked. We started to use the door instead, it was more convenient.

One night we got back from our swim and Mom was in the kitchen. She put the cat out and then locked the door! (Most unusual.) There were Jean and I, shivering in our wet bathing suits, more from the fear of being caught out, than from the cool early morning air! Being in our bathing suits and not pyjamas, we couldn't even pretend to have been to the toilet. Our problem was to get the door open. Prior to this my Dad had come home from work in the small hours, found himself locked out, couldn't wake anyone up to let him in, so just pulled the sliding bolt right out of the door. He was very strong. He fixed it, but it was never as secure. We decided to do the same. After giving Mom an half hour or so to go back to sleep, we gave the door a good hard pull. We nearly wet ourselves at the screech it made, but it still did not come loose. We sat, with bated breath, waiting for

Mom to come and investigate. But all was quiet .We managed to get the door open on the second try. Next morning Jean kept my Mom occupied in the kitchen while I fixed the door to the best of my ability. No one ever noticed, but it was back to the window after that.

So we carried on playing toktokkie, pinching fruit, and swimming at midnight. How we managed to concentrate at school, goodness only knows.

One Sunday morning we were on the way to Church. Mass was at eight in the morning so that the sportsmen and women could be free to play the games of their choice. Not having a car, we walked to St Peters. There was a traffic island in Voortrekker Street with a big tree. A garden had been planted under it. I saw a movement in the flower bed. It looked like a white, small animal of some kind. Of course I had to investigate and between Dad and I, we caught a white rat It was fully grown and we thought it must have been somebody's pet that had escaped as it was quite tame. What to do with it, now that we had caught it? I remembered that Penny's boyfriend. Ivan shared a flat with three other young men in that vicinity and took it there. They were all still in bed and not impressed to be woken up to take care of a White rat! Mom was quite horrified at the thought of having the rat in her house. She hated anything that crept or crawled, but strangely enough, she really took to that rat, now name Randolph and even allowed it to sit on her shoulder.

My little animal menagerie now consisted of Tiger the cat, Justin the dog, a budgie and the rat. They all got along very well and would curl up together on the grass mat that 1t Mom had on the verandah. Mom was a very house proud person and when Justin came to us as a tiny puppy and wasn't house trained yet, Mom would have a cadenza every time he came into the house and throw him out. That was why Dad named him Justin.

(Just in, then out). CHAPTER 6

Living in the Lowveld was idyllic. The weather was fantastic and the surrounding scenery was magnificent. Every time we got visitors, we would go on a sightseeing tour to Graskop and Sabie. Pilgrim's Rest, an old Mining Town still had original buildings and diggings and was a feast of history reflecting the Gold Rush days which came to the

Lowveld with the discovery of gold at Pilgrim's Rest and Barberton. God's Window overlooks the spectacular scene of many miles of valleys, with rivers and more mountains in the background. The Pinnacle is a majestic column of rock standing alone on the floor of a gorge, an incredible remnant of some distant upheaval on earth. The bizarre shapes of Bourke's Potholes were created by erosion of water. Gold was found in the Blyde

River and the mine was called Bourke's Luck.

These are all well known and visited tourist attractions today, but back then, they-were not commercialized, and we so enjoyed the natural splendour, even though accessibility was sometimes difficult. To get to the Pinnacle, for example, we had to climb down a cliff into the chasm. Going down was not too arduous because there were many trees growing in the wall of the cliff and we used these as steps. Climbing back out was much more difficult. We went to Bioscope every Saturday afternoon. We got a half a crown pocket money every week. That was two shillings and sixpence. A shilling got you into Bioscope, and you could buy a Coke, Ice cream or Chocolate for a sixpence. We got four Niggerballs or two Wilson toffees or a large Wicks bubblegum for a penny. A half crown went quite far in those days.

We rode our bicycles to a farm out on the Barberton road to visit two sisters who were school friends. They had a stream running through the property as well as pecan nut trees. We swam and ate our full of the nuts, enduring blisters on our fingers frorn cracking the shells.

Those bicycles took us everywhere. There are many, many waterfalls in the Lowveld, big and small, and there was one just outside of town that we frequented. It was completely natural then, fems, rocks and rushing water. It has been commercialized now, as have many of our favourite places. We used to braai in the mouth of the Sudwala Caves long before they were opened up to the Public. We had many favourite picnic spots along the local rivers and in the summer, picnicking was a Sunday occupation.

Gail was another friend who spent a lot of time with Jean and L We used to go down to the Railway siding where fruit was loaded. There was a hut beside the rails. For some reason sawdust was dumped against it. We would climb on to the roof of the hut and jump down into the sawdust. What energy. On one occasion Gail jumped and hurt her arm. We had to give up our game when Gail wouldn't stop complaining that her arm ached. As it happened the poor girl had cracked her ulna, which we only discovered the next day, when we couldn't take her moaning and groaning anymore, and we took her to the doctor, who took ex-rays. We couldn't admit to anyone how it had happened, so said she had fallen off the bed. I don't think the doctor or anyone else believed us, but they put her arm in a cast, which of course, we all signed. CLIJ\1B EVERY MOUNTAIN

We built a tree house in the Jakaranda tree over the road from our house. From the tree top we built a Foofee slide, which was a long length of very thick wire threaded through a short piece of pipe and anchored to the ground by a stake. We spent many happy hours sliding down the Foofee slide. The only problem was getting the pipe back up to the top of the wire for the next journey down. We solved the problem by tying a piece of string to the pipe and pulling it back up the wire.

Jean, Gail and I used to go our to Jackie's farm, where we would swim in the dam which wasn't very clean. The mud would squelch between our toes and the water was murky brown. When I think about it now, I squirm. With all the swimming we did in our youth in many rivers and dams, no wonder I got Bilharzia. On this farm there were a lot of wild donkeys. We pretended to be horse trainers. We made a bridle out of rope and between the four of us we managed to catch one of the donkeys. We blindfolded the poor beast and Jackie mounted it for the first ride, which turned out to be the last. Not having a bit to put in its mouth, poor Jackie had no control. The donkey bucked and made straight for the barbed wire fence. Jackie was a tiny chap and no match for the donkey. He screamed

"its going to kill me" and promptly fell off. Except for bruised pride and sore butt, he wasn't hurt, but that was enough for us three girls to chicken out and not even try.

Jean and I had friends who were boys, but not boyfriends. Tom and Bruce were two boys in our swimming team that Jean and I got along with. The four of us would set off early to cycle to White River. Itwas uphill all the way and would take about four hours, with many stops to catch our breath. Once there, all hot and sweaty, we would have a CLIJ\1B EVERY MOUNTAIN nice, cold, coke at the little cafe and then turn around for the return trip. This was downhill almost all the way, and when we hit a slight uphill we'd already gathered enough speed to CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN get over it without stopping. So we used to fly back to Nelspruit in about twenty minutes.

What a thrill!

We rode out to the aerodrome, to Crocodile Valley Citrus Estate and to Hall and Sons, stopping occasionally to pick a few oranges to quench our thirst.

One evening at the movies, Tom, Bruce, Jean and I were discussing a swim later.

After the movie the boys walked us home, and came in for coffee as usual, so as not to cause suspicion. We arranged to meet them on the swimming pool corner at midnight. We went quietly over the gate and into the tepid water. All of a sudden there was a crashing commotion coming through the hedge. All four of us made a bee line for the steps at the shallow end and sat crouching and shivering with fear, we really thought we'd been caught. Then, very loudly, a voice called "can we join you"? It was two young fellows who worked at a local armature winding firm. They had sat behind us in the bioscope and overheard us making plans. We soon recovered from our fright, laid down the law about the noise, and continued to enjoy our swim.

20 CHAPTER 7

One day Steven came to visit Jean on horseback. At the same time Terry came to visit me and he was riding a Motorbike. It started raining, so Steven put the horse in our

Doll's House that Dad had built for me in the back garden. It was a spacious structure built out of split poles, and had two large windows and a lockable door. We were enjoying coffee and biscuits in our kitchen when Mom gazed out of the window and saw the horse which had stuck his head out of the window of the doll's house. She screeched in surprise and Dad came to see what the matter was. .Dad surveyed the horse and as he -rhal had seen the motorbike in the front, he said very dryly, "Just look at all

Horsepower!" Jean and I used to go to visit her sister in Brakpan during the longer school holidays. We would visit Jean's father in the Sanatarium. This entailed taking the train from Brakpan to Johannesburg and then a bus to the Sanatarium near

Edenvale.

Then I fell in love for the first time. We met him on the train when we were coming back

from a holiday with Jean's sister. His name was Roy, he was blond and blue eyed and had the cutest dimples. He was an apprentice electrician on the Railways. Those were the

Ducktail days when hair was slicked back with Brylcreem. Roy and I dated. I adored him...f

Roy lived in a caboose down at the station, which was only a block away from our , house. One night Jean and I were going swimming again and decided to invite Roy along. On our way to the pool we went down to the station, climbed over the wall from the street, and sneaked into the caboose which was on a side line a little way from the main line. Roy was sleeping with his back to the door. I shook him on the shoulder, saying

21 · 'wake up and come swimming with us'. Well he slowly woke up and rolled over. What a

shock, it wasn't Roy! When we realized this, we were out of there like a shot.

Roy came to visit a few days later. He had been on an emergency callout to

Komatipoort, which explained his absence in the caboose that night. His friend told him

about the midnight callers, and he of course, immediately knew what it was about. He

asked us if we had done any midnight swimming lately.

Jean and Mom were not getting along well at this stage. Mom bought me a new pair of

shoes because mine were very shabby. She explained to Jean that she could only afford

one pair that month and would get her a pair the following month. Jean always felt hard

done by, and would go behind Mom's back to Dad with stories. Dad insisted on her

getting new shoes immediately, which upset Mom as it didn't fit into her budget for the

month. It was a typical teenage rebellion from Jean and a bit of intolerance from Mom.

,)f-Jean started talking to Roy about how illtreated she was; regaled him with a load of

poor Orphan Annie stories that were pretty much fabricated. These stories solicited a lot

of sympathy from Roy. When I tried to put him in the picture of the true circumstances,

he sided with Jean and it broke up our relationship. In my heart of hearts I don't think I

ever forgave her for that.

Then Jean went to live with her sister, Margaret for about a year. During that time Penny

got married to Ivan, a young Scotsman that she met through the Church Guild and a

Dancing group. I was her bridesmaid, and Jean, Margaret and Margaret's husband Louis,

came to the wedding. This was where Jean met Andy, who was Ivan's Bestrnan

22 Andy was an Englishman who had arrived in the Country practically penniless. He was a really lovable character who suited his name as he behaved a lot like Andy Capp. It took

23 us ages to adjust to his accent, but when once we could understand him, we appreciated his terrific sense of humour. He was quite smitten with Jean from the first meeting. I will never forget our very first encounter with Andy and another Englishman, Francis. They came to the swimming pool one Saturday afternoon. Their skins were milky white and they were wearing black bathing costumes which accentuated their whiteness. Next to us suntanned South Africans they really looked very odd indeed. Well, we adopted Andy and even Mom loved him. He had a hearty appetite and enjoyed her cooking and was always very polite, grateful and complimentary. These winning ways were a hit with our

Mom.

Francis went back to the UK and married Amelia, and after he brought her back, we became best friends. After Penny's wedding our house was crowded to the brim with guests and in the melee I managed to persuade Mom to let me go back to Louis Trichardt with Auntie Gil¥Penny and Ivan had a three week honeymoon in Durban and as soon as they got back, Dad asked Ivan to drive them to Louis Trichardt to fetch me because I was missing school. They did so, only to find, on arrival that I had left on the train the night before. If I think of the instant communication available today, I can only shake my head at the lack of it back then. Phones in homes were only for the well off.

Jean came back to live with us shortly after. We had both left school and were working. I never did go back to school, but found myself a job in a Stationer-cum-toy shop.

I worked a block away from where Ivan worked and used to walk to work and back. Ivan on the other hand used to travel in style in his yellow VW Beetle. Some days on my way home I would be unfortunate enough to meet Ivan on the way home too. Instead of offering me a lift, he would chase me down the road, through the triangle of veld in front of our house, and if I wasn't fast enough getting through the gate, he would pin me against the fence, with that damned yellow bug. How he loved to torment me. One day though, I got my own back on him. We were on Mom's front verandah and he was at it again, bumping and pushing me around. I lost my temper and gave him a clout which sent him skidding backwards over Mom's highly polished floor. He surfed on the grass mat, tumbled over the pouffe, and banged his head against the wall. The shocked look on his face was a treat, he left me alone after that, but not for long.

Another nice thing about living in Nelspruit was that it was central to so many places.

Lourenco Marques was only 200 kilometers away, our nearest access to the sea. The

Kruger National Park was right on our doorstep with its variety of wild animals, and there were lovely hot springs at Badplaas.

Andy, Jean and I went to Lourenco Marques for a weekend in the early 1960's. Jean would not eat the fish that was served at the Boarding House, so we had to go to a beach cafo to find her something to eat. It was there that I met Antonio. He was tall, dark and very handsome. Like a young Gregory Peck. It was an instant attraction and he spent the whole weekend with us. Love letters flowed between us for nearly a year, with occasional phone calls to my place of work in between. CHAPTER S

Ivan and Penny produced the first grandchild for both families. We were all very excited when baby Jonathan was born. I went down to the station with the news as Dad was in

Graskop. The Station Master phoned him to tell him that the eagerly awaited baby was born. In his excitement, Dad said in Afrikaans, "Se my gou, Jan, is ek Oupa of Ouma?"

(Tell me quickly, am I Granny or Grandad). I am Jonathan's Godmother and adored him.

Working in a Stationers-cum-toyshop enabled me to bring home a toy for him daily. He became accustomed to this and would go for my handbag as soon as I walked in.

Eventually, Penny begged me to recycle some of the toys as he was too small to knowthe difference and was being spoilt.

A month before baby Jonathan was born Francis and Amelia had a little girl and named her Shelly. They were christened on the same day by Father Charles. We bathed them together and dressed them in their christening robes and they were just the sweetest little babies. They were so intrigued with each other that neither of them cried when father poured water over their heads.

Jean and Andy were the next to get married and they went to live in England. We were all so sad when we saw them off at the station en route to Cape Town where they boarded one of the Union Castle Liners. I was her bridesmaid. We were just eighteen. Shortly before the wedding Andy came home from Swaziland with all his worldly belongings in a trunk. He upended it onto the carpet in Jean's bedroom and told her to sort it out and wash the dirty laundry. Jean took umbrage! We girls were brought up in a home that had CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN a housemaid, washerwoman, and gardener. She was aghast that her future husband would expect that of her. We often wondered after they settled in England how long it took her to adjust to a totally different way oflife.

Uncle Gabe also left the house after years when he married a widow, Kate and went to live on her farm. We were amazed how this move rejuvenated him. He was in his sixties when he took to farming, but was out on the tractor and in the orchards and fields daily.

He had found a new meaning to his life.

By this time Penny and Ivan had joined a Construction company and were living on site in Swaziland with baby Jonathan. I went to visit them and met all the people on the site.

They were a great group and we played cards in the mess after dinner. I found a good friend in Joe.

One weekend, we took a tour to Lourenco Marques. Three young men got on to the tour bus armed with 2 litre cokes. These must have been heavily laced with Brandy, as they got louder by the minute. We arrived in LM around 6.00 p.m. and were given time to freshen up before going in for dinner. After dinner we were taken on a tour of the city. This ended in the Red Light District at a Strip Club. There were three strippers.

The first was a skinny little thing, dressed like a school girl, and she stripped down to a bikini. The second came out in evening dress complete with long gloves and also stripped down to her bikini. The third was a really buxom wench who was soon stripped down to nipple caps and a bikini bottom. She danced up to a gentleman and invited him to untie the bows on her bikini bottom. The band played a drum roll and as the bikini bottom fell away, our three young men shouted in unison "Vrystaat", a popular South

African cheer.

26 CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

The entertainment for Sunday morning was a visit to the Museums, followed by a boat trip up the river to see the hippos. Then back to the Hotel to freshen up for lunch which was on Inhaca Island, famous for its Seafood Cuisine. To get to the Island we had to take the ferry. This was a small motor boat. The deck was smart, newly painted in bright cheerful colours. The tourist spread around the deck and lounged on the benches. The black workers returning to the Island were ushered down to the hold. We were no sooner out of the harbour when a sudden squall hit us. There we were all dressed _up in our finery, about to be soaked. We needn't have worried, as in no time at all, the hold was vacated and we moved down into the shelter, and the workers came up on deck! I

Really enjoyed that holiday, then it was back home to Nelspruit, and back to work.

With Jean gone I used to usher at the bioscope with Raymond .. They paid us the huge sum of fifty cents per night! But we did get to see all the films for free.

Raymond was a very good dancer and taught me how to do the Twist on the stage of the bioscope. It took me ages to master it. I always had two left feet, not that you needed feet for the Twist, it was the bum movement you had to get right!

27 CLI1\1B EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 9

Enter Max. He had light brown hair in a crew cut and blue eyes. He was tall and slim and not bad looking at all. I met hirn at the bioscope. The next day he came to my place of work and made a date for us to go to the Drive-in on Friday night. He was to fetch me at seven.

On Friday afternoon, an old friend who was on a weekend pass from the Army came into the shop and invited me to supper with his folks. He looked so handsome in his uniform that I clean forgot the date with Max and arranged for hirn to pick me up at six.

My poor Murn had to make all the excuses under the sun for us girls when we double dated. I told her to tell Max that I had forgotten my dinner date with a family and not to mention the son, David. When there was a knock on the door at a quarter to six I happily went to let David in, but who should it be, non other than Max. I could have crawled into a hole if there had been one handy. I had to make my own excuses and get rid of him by six. I somehow managed to accomplish that, but it wasn't the end of the story for that evemng.

We had a lovely meal with David's folks and then decided to go to the movies. To get to the bioscope entrance you went through the cafe that shared the complex and who should be sitting at one of the cafe tables, watching the crowd, but Max! Poor David didn't know what was happening when I pulled him into the darkness of the bioscope so fast that it was a wonder he didn't trip over his own feet! CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

The next day, I didn't feel too good about being caught out and phoned Max at the

Montrose Falls Hotel where he was working. I told him that I was sorry, but David's

parents kept the fact that David was there as a surprise. That phone call was the

biggest mistake of my life.

Max said he needed to come into town the next morning to get the Sunday papers and ifI

liked he would pick me up to spend the day at Montrose. Which we did. ) if Max picked me up at eight for the drive to Montrose. It was a beautiful day. Once there,

we went for a walk, clambering over the rocks to the falls and sitting in the sun and

talking. Actually, he talked and I listened. I was fascinated with his life story. He had

done so much and seen so many exciting places. We went back to the Hotel for lunch and

I was very embarrassed, I had a spicy soup for starters and suddenly my nose started

running. I had no hankie and no tissues and had to sniff, sniff, and sniff my way through

lunch. The afternoon was spent on the lawn under the trees in front of the hotel. He

continued to regale me with stories of his life. He said he was an only child, that he lost

his parents at an early age, came into an inheritance and had spent it all adventuring

around the world. I was in awe, and became totally infatuated. He'd come from Durban,

a big city boy and I'd grown up in "verkrampte" Nelspruit. He was 23 and I was a very

naive 18. Max visited me regularly from then on.

I was still corresponding with Antonio, and the letters still flowed. A couple of months

after I met Max I got a letter from Antonio to say that he was corning the Nelspruit and

had a big question to ask. From his letters I knew what the question would be. He asked

that I meet him on the verandah of the Paragon Hotel at eight p.m. Max was coming into

town that night, so needless to say I never went to the Paragon. I don't think I was ready for any kind of permanent relationship, I hadn't got Roy completely out of my mind.

Tony was a memory of a lovely weekend of sweet kisses. in the moonlight on the beaches of Lourenco Marques, and beautiful words on paper, which was very romantic. But Max was right here, very beguiling, charming and jealous. The question was never asked or answered and I never heard from Antonio again. That was the great "what if ' in my life.

Mom took an instant dislike to Max. She could not believe any of his stories and swore he should have been 50 years old to have achieved half of his purported accomplishments. Mom fought with him constantly and vehemently. One day she threw a bowl of peanuts at him. (She used to buy peanuts from an old maid for two and a half cents a cup and she always bought twenty cents worth). The peanuts rolled all over the floors, under the furniture, and into every nook and cranny. It was actually quite funny, every time she swept, she found peanuts, they turned up for days afterwards, they seemed to get in every where and Max would be cursed all over again. Dad missed out on all this, as he was working very long shifts at the time. I often wondered if he worked those long hours on purpose.

By the time I met Max I had been saving for over a year. He didn't have a car and

convinced me to buy a second hand one. It was a little green Morris 1000, which I got for

R60.00. , ' I had a cousin living at Lake Chrissie who was about to be married: She asked me to be her bridesmaid, so we made several trips there over weekends for fittings of my bridesmaid's dress. Mom, Dad, Max and I went up for the wedding and Penny and Ivan and baby Jonathan, came from Swaziland. It was a beautiful wedding, set in a lovely

30 garden with a view of the lake. I realized that I was being a bridesmaid for the third time.

31 I thought 'always a bridesmaid and never a bride? No way!' Max and I got engaged that weekend.

After we got home from the wedding, things got progressively worse between Mom and

Max. She actually called the police to throw him out of the house on one occasion. I just felt so sorry for him.The constant bickering between them was spoiling my relationship with Mom. Ifshe had left well enough alone I am sure I would never have married Max.

The friction and fighting caused me to move out and go and live with the Mansfields.

Doris Mansfield and I went to school together and her brother, Raymond_ was a little bit younger than us. They had a spare room for me and Mrs Mansfield mothered and spoilt me. This was a comfort to me after the traumatic break up with my own mother.

Nelspruit was really "verkrampt." in those days. The only entertainment we had was the bioscope and the Drive In. We used to go to Barberton to 'The Session" in the town square on a Saturday night. The road to Barberton twisted and turued through the mountains and was very treacherous. One time on the way home, the lights of our car conked out and we had to travel home on that terrible road with one car in front of us and one behind. Itwas fortunate that the young crowd from Nelspruit all went to Barberton on a Saturday night. Itwas such a relief to get home safely as the road had steep cliffs on the one side and just as steep drops on the other. My imagination had us all dead at the bottom of the mountain.

Our Sundays were spent at the swimming pool of the Shonalonga Hotel which was

just out of town, or to one of the many rivers and picnic spots on the outskirts of town,

for example the Gladdespruit which had an exciting chute through the rocks to glide

down into the pool below. CHAPTER 10

Itwas in 1964 that the "Great Trek" began. Max left the Montrose Falls Hotel, and

started selling clothes in Swaziland. On one of these trips he landed us each ajob at an

Hotel in Manzini. He was to be Assistant Manager and I was to be the Receptionist. He

really did have the gift of the gab to get me that job without an interview.

The Hotel and indeed, Swaziland was a real cultural shock to me. There was no

Apartheid there. I suppose this was where my real education in life began. The black prostitutes would come and sit in the bar and pick up white men, totally illegal in those days in South Africa, because of the Immorality Act. Most of the men had car registrations from the Orange Free State, one of the provinces where Apartheid was most severely practiced. Then there was the Dining Room. Swazis would come in, order from the A la Carte menu and proceed to eat with their hands. I found that quite gross.

The Hotel wasn't very big, but it was very modem for the times, and it had a beautiful

swimming pool. On my off times, I enjoyed a swim in my bikini. Max hated this, but, so what, I loved it. oua. Also living in Manzini at that time, were'\nends from Nelspruit, Francis and Amelia.

Their home was quite near the hotel. I visited Amelia on many occasions. We really got along well, and spent happy hours together. I used to take the car to visit her, even though I had not learned to drive properly yet, and did not have my licence. I drove there in second gear all the way. On one occasion, Max had parked the car in a position that it needed to be reversed. I tried, but carried on going forward until the car was stuck tightly against a fence. I had to get Max to come and show me where the reverse gear was.

Sometimes I went out at night and wondered why it was so dark, until I discovered the light switch. That was how I learned to drive.

I met Joe on a visit to Penny and Ivan prior to meeting Max. He was an older man, but really took a fancy to me. One day, who should walk into the Hotel, but Joe. We recognized each other inunediately and started chatting. I told him that I was engaged and showed him my ring. Just as Max was coming around the comer, Joe said ''throw away that grain of sand, and I will buy you a rock" and Max heard it all. Being as jealous as he was he didn't speak to me for a week. We didn't stay in Manzini for long, before we were on the move again. There were too many people in Manzini to take my attention away from him. I realized then that he wanted me all to himself.

He got us jobs on a Citrus Estate in Malkems, his fourth in a year. I should have realized then how unstable he was. We moved in without any furniture. The house looked as if it might have been built as Single Quarters. Ithad a long verandah and starting from the left, it had a bathroom, the three bedrooms, the kitchen and lastly the lounge. There was lovely front garden with lawns and a vegetable garden at the back. That was where

Cheeky, my vervet monkey had his pole. I got the monkey from Rosie. He was very clever. I had a patch of chili bushes just within reach of his rope. He used to stretch to the limit of his little body, pick one and eat it. Then he would cry and cry until I brought him some milk. This happened daily until I removed the chili bush that was in his reach.

The only possession I had was my Singer Sewing machine that I had bought, while working in Nelspruit. There was a Supermarket in Malkems that sold everything. We bought two single beds from them. Double beds weren't available. I don't think they CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN were the in thing then. I made bedside tables from lug boxes which I covered with a frill.

The lounge furniture was the same, except that I padded the seats. The Coffee Table was two lug boxes side by side, also covered with a frill. No wonder I hate frills!

The Estate was a beautiful farm, growing oranges, lemons and grapefruit for export.

You went through the Orchards to the Nursery, which was run by an elderly

German called Bok. He grew shrubs and roses for local distribution. . From the

Nursery there was a slope down to a charming river, gurgling through the rocks, shaded by the trees on the river bank.

The Pack house where Max and the Manager worked was some distance from where I worked in the office with Rosie, a very nice young, coloured girl. There were no phones in the pack house, so if a call came through for one of them, one of us would get on the bicycle and go and call them. They would then cycle back to take the call and we would have to walk back to the office. A woman phoned one day and asked if we had any

Brun&felsia. When I said we did not, she was very rude and wanted to speak to the

Manager. I got on the bike and went to fetch him.He obviously knew her because this time he didn't take the bike, but walked back to the office with me. He spoke to her and

I heard him tell her we didn't have any yesterday, we haven't got any today, and we won't have any tomorrow! I knew this was the common name for Brunfelsia, and so wished I had thought to say this.

One Sunday, Max and I decided to take a walk down to the river. What we saw there was a real ebony and ivory scene. There was Bok with his stark naked white body cavorting with not one but three black girls, their wet naked bodies shining in the sunshine. They CLil\ffi EVERY MOUNTAIN

were so engrossed with their pleasures in the water that I don't think they saw us, so we just quietly turned around and went home.

Fritz, the owner of the Estate was also a womanizer. I had an excellent houseboy who

could cook a gourmet meal out of nothing. He and Fritz fancied the same black girl and

Fritz made me fire him, which really upset me.

One morning Fritz came into the office and asked me to get a locksmith to fetch his

Mercedes Benz which was parked somewhere in the bushes between Malkerns and the

farm. The locksmith was very intrigued because it took him some time to locate the car.

When the story came out, it transpired that he'd had some prostitute and when he refused

to pay her for her services she grabbed his keys and disappeared into the bushes. He had

to walk home. Rosie told me this, as all the black staff used to confide in her, so we

always got the true story in the end.

Fritz landed up in hospital and like good employees, we went to visit him. We were so

embarrassed when he told us, without as much as a blush, how he had to dangle his

family jewels in a pot of condie's crystals. That in a day when private was private and

you didn't even utter the word "sex" aloud. I really wished the ground would open and

swallow me up. CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 11

All this time the dissension between Mom and Max continued and she refused to give us permission to marry. She was very critical however, of us living alone in the same house. It took a threat that we would disgrace her by falling pregnant to change her mind and let us get married. Dad had already consulted a lawyer in Nelspruit, who advised him that I would be of age all too soon, and it would be better to be supportive and let me follow my head.

The wedding date was set for July. We decided to marry in Nelspruit which had been my home for my whole life. Before this my Passport had expired, so we found a back road without a Border post which we used during this period for going through to Nelspruit to make arrangements for the wedding. Fr Charles needed all our particulars. He knew my family, and Max told him that he was an only child. His Mother had passed away when he was sixteen and his father soon after

One night on our way to Nelspruit we found a huge log across the road. When we stopped to remove it, a Policeman came out of the bushes where his caravan and car were parked. After long explanations about how I was going to get a new passport when once we were married, he invited us into his caravan for coffee. We chatted for a while and then carried on. We hadn't gone very far when we saw headlights in the rear view mirror, and the chase was on. We thought he had changed his mind about letting us go. He chased us for miles and was getting closer and closer, eventually I said to Max, he had better stop. The poor Policeman was chasing us to give me back my cigarettes which I had left in his caravan.

Max, Mom and I went to Johannesburg to hire a wedding dress. The car had a puncture in the middle of Fox Street and no trouble to Max; he pulled it onto the pavement. A traffic policeman wanted to know why we were parked on the pavement, but when he saw our predicament, he helped us to change the e. lrh1e:i::1-> ·

As our Wedding day got closer, Fritz promised me as many roses as I wanted to decorate the Church. I went to Nelspruit a week before and Max was to arrive on the Friday with the roses. Max phoned me on the party line (Fritz always listened in) and said Fritz had changed his mind about the roses. I was devastated, as where was I going to find flowers at such short notice. Even though we had lovely weather in Nelspruit, it had been a bad winter elsewhere and frost had killed off most of the flower growers' crops. I told Max to tell Fritz to stick the roses up his you know where, one at a time and I hoped the thorns pricked the hell out of him! Suffice to say, Max arrived on Saturday morning with buckets and buckets of roses, far more than we needed.

This was the aggravating start to what should have been the happiest day of my life.

Penny and family arrived on Saturday morning, just after Max. Mom felt she needed a drink or two, which did not improve my state of mind. I dreaded her making an utter fool of herself and all of us at the wedding.

Things got worse, Ivan drove Penny and I to the Church and Fr Charles came out, and I could see he was in a bit of a tizz. He had double booked the time of the wedding!

What could we do, we had no alternative but to agree to a double wedding. The other couple was Italian and she wore a scarlet coat over a pretty floral dress, whilst I was in traditional white wedding garb. We stood opposite each other, complete strangers, and made our vows. The whole ceremony passed in a bit of a blur, my mind had shut off. I do remember though, that walking up that aisle my thoughts were 'I don't have to go through with this', but I didn't act on the thought and was married.

The whole afternoon was a mass of confusion, and as we left the Church, Father Charles came running out with the register for us to sign. We signed our names on the bonnet of the car. We had a small reception on Mom's verandah. Then we left on honeymoon which was a weekend in Johannesburg. Not very exciting......

Back to Malkerns and the new life as a married woman. We had only been married a couple of weeks when one day Max flicked me playfully on the backside with a dish cloth, it stung like hell. Well I let him have it with my nails (I always had good strong nails). I scratched him all down his neck. Then I moved into the spare room and pretended he didn't exist. I would cook for myself, but nothing for him.When our friends, the Wilsons, came to visit, I would act quite normally, chatting to them, but ignoring him completely. After giving him the silent treatment for about two weeks, I was coming out of the bathroom one morning when we met on the verandah. He grabbed me by the shoulders and shouted "speak to me"! I didn't like that either, so I bit him on the arm until he bled. The next time the Wilsons came to visit he showed them his terrible injuries and said ''.just look what that hellcat of a wife did to me" Shame, the poor abused husband. I told him "That will teach you not to hurt me, even in fun". We made up then, but he learned his lesson. Jakob, the mechanic used to drink and beat up his wife. She would come to me with a black eye and cry on my shoulder. I told her I would never put up with it and why didn't she hit him back. She said he was too strong. "Oh well", I said "wait until he's asleep and take his brandy bottle and hit him". I never for the life of me thought she would do it, but she did and he landed up in hospital for a few days. He never lifted his hands to her again for as long as we knew them. I suffered agonies of remorse for days after, thinking it was my entire fault I was nineteen and the irony of one so young giving a much older women advice had not struck me at the time.

We used to hunt buck in the oats fields. These were wild buck that were destroying the oats. I learned to make biltong and I remember the first batch was too salty.

Dad and Mom came to visit us on the Estate. Thank goodness for the Kombi we were driving at the time. We went to Nelspruit to fetch them and loaded up a couple of beds that we were short of, and away we went It was a very pleasant stay. To start with, there was no drinking, so Mom never got aggressive towards Max. Neither Max or I drank and in any case we couldn't afford to buy liquor. Although we all smoked, we used to buy Shag and Rizzlas and roll our own smokes. At night we played Bridge by lamp light as we didn't have electricity. It was sad irons, coal stove, lamps and candles. We did have fun though. One night Max went to the toilet and Mom, Dad and I arranged his cards so that he should get a grand slam. When he came back to join us and looked at his cards, he grinned broadly. "You can play where and what you like" he said "I am going to get a Grand Slam". But it wasn't his turn to play first, and much to his chagrin, we wiped the board with him.

An Uncle, my Mom's younger brother and his wife came to visit during that time. Uncle

Des brought us a gift, of all things, a bag of oranges. Talk about bringing coal to New Castle, we had a good laugh about that. Dad's leave was over and we took them home to

Nelspruit, beds and all.

We were on our way to bioscope in Manzini one evening, when all of a sudden the St

Christopher medal fell off of the dashboard. I had a vision of a smashed Kombi. I told

Max to slow down and was ready to turn around and go home. Max said I was being silly and carried on. When we got to the intersection where the Malkems road joined the main

Manzini/Mbabane road, we came upon the vision that I had.

A Kombi was coming from Manzini and a bakkie from Mbabane. Some fool was coming from the club at Malkems and when he got to the intersection, he didn't stop. The other two vehicles swerved to avoid him and hit each other head on. It was a very gruesome accident. Both the fellows in the Kombi lost their legs and the one in the bakkie had head injuries. The idiot who caused the accident was unscathed.

40 CHAPTER 12

Soon after, we were on the move again. I began to realize that Max was a bit of a Walter

Mitty character. He always thought the next job would be better, the next town would be nicer, and the future would be more prosperous. We left Swaziland after about 10 months.

The next destination was Kibler Park, then on to Homestead Apple Orchards. By this time I was pregnant and I suffered with heartburn. The only thing that would get rid of it was an apple, and despite the name, there were none to be found at Homestead Apple

Orchards. Thank goodness there was no morning sickness. There I cooked on the little pot bellied stove that was meant to heat the geyser. I became an expert at "making do" and getting the best out of what was available.

Next was New Redruth in Alberton and from there to Diepsloot, north of Johannesburg.

Itwas at Diepsloot that I found out what a liar Max was. He was in the bath one night and

I was sitting on the toilet seat, keeping him company, when he told me that his father was still alive and he had two younger brothers! What a bombshell! All I could think about was telling Mom and Dad. Dad, I knew, would take it in his stride, but Mom was another kettle of fish. She hated Max with a passion and that would be another nail in his coffin. I also wondered if I was legally married, seeing that Max had lied to Fr Charles about his father being dead. I had all these terrible thoughts going round in my head. I was absolutely devastated. I felt as ifl was living a lie. CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

At Diepsloot Max went into the property market, and was working for 0 Kaplan & Co., who were Estate Agents. I often went with him as I had nothing better to do. I was bored at home on my own. One day, Max had to go into the office and parked outside on the pavement, which was illegal. I sat in the car reading a book. There was a tap on the window and there stood a traffic policeman" I had to quickly come up with an excuse.

As the Kombi still had its Swaziland number plates, I told him we came from a very small town in Swaziland, my husband was nervous in all the traffic, and had gone to find someone to drive us home. He accepted my story and said that he hoped my husband found someone soon. What a relief as he walked away satisfied. A few days later, same place, same tap, same Policeman. All he said was "Your husband get nervous again

Lady" and walked off laughing. Thank goodness some Policemen.have a sense of humour. I made darn sure Max never parked there again, not whilst I was in the car anyway. My nerves were shot!

One day we went to view a small holding. What an experience! There were frogs, big frogs, small frogs, and bull frogs bigger than a meat platter. I had nightmares for ages about the frogs. I couldn't understand anyone wanting to buy this marshy bog to farm on.

Wetland Conservation would have been an ideal customer.

Itwas from Diepsloot that we went to Hoedspruit where Max worked on a Tomato farm.

Itwas a very hot place, even for me who loved the heat. By this time I was eight months pregnant with my first child. Max had chosen the name Gary for a boy and I liked

Melody Gail for a girl. CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN I used to see Max off to work in the morning, then fill the bath with cold water and spend the morning in the bath with a book. I would get out for Lunch which was prepared by CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAJN the cook who came as one of the perks with the job. After the lunch I was back in the bath with the inevitable book.

One day I had to go to the shop which was about two miles from the farm. I asked Max if there was enough petrol in the Kombi, and off I went to the shop. Despite Max's assurance, on the way back, the Kombi ran out of petrol! I decided to walk back, taking a short cut over a ploughed field back to the farm. An eight month pregnancy, a ploughed field and the cloying heat, did not go together. I got back to the farm as hot and as mad as hell. Max tried to bluff his way out of it by saying it was dirt in the carburetor, I wasn't having any of his bullshit stories and he got the silent treatment for a few days. CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 13

Max never needed a reason or an excuse for changing jobs, he would go to work at one place in the morning and come home in the afternoon with a different job. I think it was actually the seventh or eighth job he had by the time we got to Phalaborwa.

His reason for leaving the tomato farm was that he and Dad had found a farm to buy near Phalaborwa that they were going to develop together.

He hired two workers to cut down the Mopani trees and to then pour diesel on the stumps to burn out the roots. He found us acco=odation on a plot on the outskirts of

Phalaborwa that was dry, dusty and as hot as hell. The house we moved into couldn't really be called a house as it was one big room. The windows didn't have window panes, but were covered by gauze and had canvas blinds that could be rolled down if the weather was bad, and to stop the wind from blowing in the dust. We divided the room into two with a curtain and used one part as a bedroom and the other as a living-cum kitchen area. There was no electricity or running water. We used paraffin lamps and candles for lights and bought water from a farmer for 20c for a 44 gallon drum. He delivered the drums of water with a tractor and trailer. Max made a stand outside and fitted a tap onto a drum, and we had running water! We bathed in a galvanized bath and didn't have to heat the water as it was so hot, a cold bath was most refreshing. There was no inside toilet, but a "longdrop" which is a deep pit with plank seat, with a round hole in it, in a little shed outside. I did most of my cooking on a homemade stove that I had made from breeze blocks with a corrugated iron sheet on top. There was enough fuel around to make a fire under my delightful stove, which worked very well actually. I also had a gas primus for making coffee etc.

Two weeks before the baby was due I went to Nelspruit for a check up. The doctor said there was something wrong and took X-rays. He said I would have to have a Caesarean section as I had a disproportioned pelvis. I could choose any date in the next two weeks.

Well that didn't happen. I went into labour at about midnight. Doctor said we would wait and see what happened. Ifnothing did, he would operate at 3.00 p.m. on the afternoon of

19th May. Nothing happened except for the pains. By 2.30 the excruciating pain seemed continuous. There was a clock on the wall which I watched as each minute, which felt like an hour, ticked by. At last it was time and a few hours later I held my baby boy inmy arms. I had to stay in hospital for about 10 days. Once out of hospital it was back to

Phalaborwa.

One night on a visit to the "longdrop" I dropped the torch, which rolled across the seat and fell into the hole. It landed in the pooh with the light shining up. For a few more nights we had that light shining up our bums, until the batteries went flat. We had to buy a new torch.

Mom and her friends, Kate and Gabe decided to come and visit. How embarrassing! Max bought a couple of beds from the furniture shop where he was working at the time. Once again, thank goodness for the Kombi. When they arrived I managed to accommodate them all. Mom went home and told Dad that we lived in a barn. I suppose she was right, but I felt very hurt at the time. Years later, I heard from my sister that Mom told her about how they were looking for the house and she saw a line of snow white nappies, and immediately she said to Gabe," you can turn in here, that is Helen's work." Kate had a more positive attitude and said the meal I had cooked on my outside, homemade stove, was the best pork chops she had ever eaten. She mentioned that meal often over the following years.

Max was invited to fly to Johannesburg with one of the Baker brothers in a small plane and I had to take him to the airfield. Once out of Phalaborwa you had to drive through the bush. On my way home I could not find the bush track to our plot, so I stopped a policeman and asked him for directions. As neither the Kombi nor I had a licence, it was a nerve wracking encounter. Then to crown it all, on the way home I missed a turn off and reversed straight into a Mopani tree. It was Max's fault, as if he had cleaned the

Kombi; I would have been able to see the road out of the back window. Fortunately the

Kombi had a solid steel bumper, and that was all that got damaged. Lucky for me as the engine is at the back.

I tried to straighten the bumper, but it didn't work. The bumper was too hard, the hammer was too small, and I wasn't strong enough. All I did was break the hammer. One of the workers suggested I tie a rope to the bumper and to a tree and pull the kink out, but I wasn't confident enough about my driving at the time, to attempt that feat. I suppose we all have those arguments in our minds, if he says, I'll say. Well Max didn't lose his temper, and was only concerned that Gary and I were unhurt. Some time later, however, he did lose his temper, when the Kombi blew a gasket and he couldn't get the engine out because of the bent bumper. Clearing the Mopani trees became boring and Max once again got the urge for a change of scene. He signed over his share of the farm to Dad and Dad later sold the farm to

Uncle Gabe, for a profit I hope.. CHAPTER 14

Our neighbours in Phalaborwa, who rented the barn opposite us, and Max, decided to move to the South Coast. We arrived in Amamzimtoti and stayed in rooms on the beach front until we found a flat which we shared. Not a good idea. They had a little girl of about 3 years old, who was a real brat.

She used to throw tantrums, scream like a banshee and lose her breath, if she didn't get her own way. Ria would go into a panic and give in to her whims. One day they went to town and I baby sat. She tried her little trick on me, but enough was enough, I took her and gave her a good few smacks on the backside. She got her breath back in a hurry. A few days later Ria said it was strange, but the brat hadn't thrown a tantrum or lost her breath in days. I never said a word. What is the saying: Bend the rod and spoil the child.

It was in Toti that I finally met my father-in-law and Max's two brothers, Wayne and

Denzil. Shame, the old man hadn't seen Max in years and all of a sudden here he was, with a wife and child. It was quite a shock for poor Charlie; he was speechless for quite a while. Once we got to know one another Charlie and I got on very well.

It was at the flat that the Jehovah's pitched up one night and condemned us all to hell because we did not intend to convert to their faith. They told us that if we didn't, we would never get to heaven. That reminded me of how, in my childhood we would watch them coming down our road, hide and studiously ignore the knock on the door.

We moved from Toti to a flat on the South Beach in Durban called Ocean Way. That was where I learned what real poverty was about. Max was selling Insurance with my Uncle

48 Ken, but it really wasn't a paying job. We never had any money and when we did have a few rand, I would buy milk coupons to ensure that my baby boy, Gary, had food. My milk had dried up due to bad nutrition. We would go down to the harbour and catch a couple of fish, bring them home and boil them. We didn't even have salt to flavour the fish. That was our staple diet for a few months. At that time, black women hawkers would come around with a tomato box of vegetables, to trade for clothing or anything else of value to them. The vegetables looked so appetizing and my body was craving for something fresh. I had no money, but offered to swap vegetables for old clothes. She took advantage ofthis. I swapped Max's only suit, a couple of shirts and my maternity dresses, for a couple of potatoes, tomatoes, onions, two mealies and a cabbage. I was that hungry.

Francis and Amelia had moved from Swaziland to Pinetown. Amelia would catch a bus, and come to visit with her two little girls, Shelly and Dawn. It was very embarrassing at first, as I had nothing to offer them to eat or drink. That didn't deter Amelia; she visited me time and again, and always brought a couple of packets of biscuits for the children.

She really was my best and only friend. We had kept in touch through all my moves and sometimes we landed in the same town at the same time.

From Durban we moved to Harrison, which is close to Cato Ridge. There Max worked for Ferralloys as a crane driver. The house we moved into was infested with sand fleas and we had to wash the wooden floors with power paraffin to get rid of them.

It was Christmas time and with a bit of money for a change, we bought a chicken from a local farmer and picked vegetables out of the garden. I managed to cook up a sumptuous feast. Our next destination was Maizelands, also near Cato Ridge. I had just got rid of the sand fleas, started a flower garden, cleaned up the veggie patch and settled into the house when Max came home and told me he had got this wonderful job on a pig farm near Cato Ridge. The same old words "This is it, Helen". I had heard them often enough and wondered how many times I would hear them again. I felt so depressed. We had only been at Harrison a few weeks. To make it even more depressing,

I was pregnant again.

I so wished that Max could have been just a little bit more like my Dad who had worked

at the same job all his life and was due to retire from it in a few years time. I thought

about growing up in the same house. We only made one move that I can remember, from

the little prefab Railway House to the newly built brick house next door.

50 CHAPTER 15

So it was off to Cato Ridge and Maizelands, this was about half way between Durban and

Pietermaritzburg. We rode from the tar road down a gravel road with paddocks on either side, up to this enormous house, with rondawels on the right. It had been a Guest Farm earlier. Even then I wondered how long my stay here would be, and hoped against hope that this really would be "it".

We went into the house from the back, through a huge kitchen with a pantry, into the impressively large dining room. The house had at least ten bedrooms, a number of bathrooms, a lounge with a fireplace (which we never used as it was summer). This led out onto a large verandah. The house was fully furnished, including linen, cutlery, crockery and a maid.

I thought I could really be happy here, as I loved the place immediately. One small problem, there was no electricity, but there was a generator for lights at night. We used mainly lamps and candles. I was used to this by now.

From the verandah, you looked down over a large Lucerne field to a stream running below. Yes, I thought, I could really be happy here, and was, for as long as it lasted.

The first night we were at Maizelands (no Maize in sight) I made bully beef sandwiches.

When I tried to open the tin, the little key broke off before the tin was open. I managed to cut my thumb on the tin pretty badly. During the night, I woke up with a fright, to a loud noise outside the window. I shot out of bed, hooking my injured thumb on the bedding. My heart was pumping and my thumb was throbbing. I was jumping around like a lunatic, and Max, the bastard was laughing. The noise was a horse neighing at the window. I didn't get much sleep that night, my thumb was too painful, and there was not even an aspirin in the house.

The pigs were housed in the rondawels. They are actually very clean animals. They would eat on one side of the rondawel and do their toiletries on the other. Every now and then a pig or two would escape and make it to the farm next door. They would eat the neighbours' Dahlia bulbs. Fortunately the neighbours were very tolerant.

There was a gaggle of geese that were quite vicious and very noisy, but they made good watchdogs. We also had free range chickens. What ajob it was to collect the eggs as they would make their nests in the strangest places. There was a Rooster in particular that I remember very well. He used to terrify all and sundry. He would attack you for no rhyme or reason until he landed in the pot and was as tough as nails.

The goats made their home in one of the paddocks. There was a very large Billy Goat who evidently didn't like black. One day, Max dressed in black jeans and a black T-Shirt went into the paddock. When he wasn't looking, old Billy butted him right over the four foot fence! What a laugh. Max didn't hurt anything other than his pride.

I celebrated my 21st Birthday at Maizelands. Francis and Amelia, old Charlie and the boys came for the weekend and the Dahlia neighbours came too. We had a suckling pig on the spit. Old Charlie made me a 21st Key on a wooden stand which many years later, I gave to my granddaughter, Claire, on her 21st. Mom and Dad sent me a beautiful dirmer service of which only the meat platter and gravy boat survived all my travels. Claire appropriated them when she got married. Penny and little Noel came to visit during this idyllic time. We met her at the Durban

Airport and on the way to the farm I had to tell her about Max having a family. She was duly shocked, as she, too had been taken in by all his earlier lies. It was absolutely super to have them there. We went to a little shop at Cato Ride. and bought some material and made the two little boys dungarees. While we were sewing, Shep, the collie, babysat the boys. He was an excellent Nanny. The verandah didn't have a railing and there was a big drop from it to the ground. Gary was crawling at this stage and every time Gary got close to the edge, Shep would herd him back to the center. Andrew, a mere year older was a big help in keeping Gary occupied.

Penny was fascinated by Max, who would come home for breakfast and regale her with grandiose plans for the future, e.g. the dream house he was going to build for me, with elaborate and original features. Come lunch time he was on about getting a Ski boat and catching fish for living. By supper it was something else. Ittook some convincing her that

I did not even hear the stories as I had developed selective hearing much earlier on in our relationship.

One weekend Francis and Amelia came to stay. Ivan and Geoff had also joined us by this time. We decided to play "Glassy". It is a game of calling up the spirits. We made squares of paper with the alphabet on each square and a yes and a no, and numerals from one to ten. These were placed in a circle on a very smooth table and a glass was placed in the centre. Each person would then place a finger lightly on the glass. A nominated person would start calling "Spirit of the glass, are you with us?" Francis was very skeptical about all of this and kept passing sarcastic comments and laughing. After calling quite a few times, the glass began to move very erratically and then spelt out "Tell Francis to leave the room". You should have seen his face, but he got out very quickly.

We all had turns to ask the Spirit questions, maiuly who he or she was, that kind of thing.

I have played on numerous occasions, so can't remember who the spirit was that night.

You could also ask more personal questions, so being pregnant; I asked what I would have. The spirits are very noncommittal and this one answered "a baby!" What a bummer.

On one of their weekend visits Francis and Amelia brought their rather large German shepherd dog with. My Siamese cat had just produced a litter of kittens and they were housed in the pantry. The dog stuck his nose in and sniffed at the kittens. The Siamese jumped on his head and rode him all the way down to the river! He never went near the pantry or the kittens again.

It was time to tell Mom I was pregnant again. I wrote her a letter, saying the chickens were broody, the geese were all sitting on eggs, the cats, pigs and goats were all pregnant and I was in the same boat.

Gary was teething and really suffering, poor baby. He usually was such a good baby. He slept through the night from day one. Inthe beginning, I used to pinch him to make sure he was still alive, back to the teeth, and advice from my dear friend Amelia. She told me to give him a teaspoonful of whisky. Pity she wasn't there that night, because he kept me up all night, giggling and laughing. He was as drunk as a Lord.

Katkazia, the maid that came as a perk with the job, was excellent. She loved Gary to bits. He used to sit on the broom, while she was sweeping that huge house. He thought it was great fun, but it was jolly hard labour for her. One morning I woke up to a most awful pong. Gary's cot was in our bedroom against the far wall. He was awake and amusing himself. He had lost his nappy, done a lovely sloppy pooh and was busily painting the cot and the wall with it. I just yelled "Katkazia" and she came from the kitchen where she was busy making coffee. No trouble, she cleaned the mess and bathed Gary, all with a smile on her face. Coffee was very late that morning.

I was really happy at Maizelands, loved the country atmosphere and all the animals. I had always loved gardening and had all the space in the world. My child was thriving, but

Max got a bee in his bonnet, once again it was "this is it, Helen." I don't remember what

"it" was, but we landed up in a crummy little furnished bachelor flat on the beach front in Durban. CHAPTER 16

So here we were, back in Durban for the second time in less than a year, with a couple of

"its" in between. The only nice thing I can say about Marlborough Court was that you walked out of the flats, over the road, and we were on the beach. This time, the creepy crawlies weren't fleas, but cockroaches. They were even in the fridge.

Mom and Dad came to visit for a week Come rain or shine, we had to go to the beach every day. Mom loved the sea, but Dad had to go in with her, to hold her hand, so that she didn't get washed away. They used to jump over the waves hand in hand. Once Dad lost his grip and a wave took Mom, knocked her over and dragged her face down onto the beach. I can see that picture so clearly even after all these years. To hear Mom describe this was entertainment par excellence! She would put her hand on her cheek and scrunch it from the bottom up and say "that bloody wave pushed me face down, under the water, into the sand and washed me out onto the beach. I could have drowned, you know."

The time had now come and I had to tell them about Charlie and the brothers. Mom had to say, that of course she always knew that Max was a bloody liar. Dad didn't have much to say then. When he finally met Charlie, his sense of humour came into play, and he said

"so I believe, you rose from the dead". I didn't think that was funny at all.

The baby was due on the 6th June and I went to the Clinic at Addington Hospital on a weekly basis. The Doctor there told me I would have a natural birth and that the country bumpkin who did the first caesarian didn't know what he was talking about. I was most upset by this, as I had all the faith in the world in my Nelspruit Doctor. He was the only doctor I ever went to throughout my whole childhood.

I went into labour a couple of days after my due date. Of course it had to be in the middle of the night. As Addington Hospital was only a couple of blocks away from the flat, we walked there. By eight the next morning, the pains had stopped, so a couple of hours later, they sent me home. I walked home with my little suitcase, and when I got there, no

Max. I thought he had taken Gary to Amelia but then I noticed that his fishing rod, which was normally on the pelmet, was gone. I took a stroll to the South Pier where he usually went fishing. Too true, there he was, with all his fishing buddies. The shock on his face when he saw me was a picture. I was not impressed. I was supposed to be in hospital giving birth, and he should have been right there waiting, not here, fishing.

The labour pains came and went for more than a month. The city bumpkin said I had my dates wrong. I went to the clinic on a Saturday morning, and the city bumpkin was on leave. I saw another doctor, who immediately sent me to the resident Gynaecologist. He examined me, and performed the caesarian first thing on the Monday morning. Whilst I was on the operating table, I came around. It was the most horrific experience. What pain.

I would think pain in my brain and it would throb, pain, pain, pain. Then I would think not sore and it would throb in my brain, not sore, not sore; not sore. I don't know how long I suffered, but it felt like forever. Anyway, I survived and then I was in for another shock. They brought my baby, another boy, to me and he was all scaly and had two bottom teeth. After a few days, the scales disappeared and the teeth fell out. I named him Rory, after my first love. I couldn't be so obvious as to name him Roy. The City

Bumpkin came to see me on his return. I asked him why I had had a caesarian, when he promised a natural birth. His defensive answer was that they thought my previous wound would tear. What nonsense.

Amelia looked after Gary whilst I was in hospital and that was when he started walking, so I missed his first steps.

For the first three months, Rory screamed day and night, I was so exhausted that I started doing the most stupid things. I packed socks in the cutlery draw and put toilet paper in the fridge and lots of other such things. I had a permanent headache that I couldn't get rid of. Many a time, in those first three months I felt like throwing the baby out of the third floor window. Then three months down the line, he was diagnosed with bronchial pneumonia.

I could not believe it took them so long to find that out, since I attended the Clinic weekly. After it was cleared up, he settled down to a routine. I caught up on my sleep, the headaches went away and things got back to normal.

Then we were back on the poverty line again and I was pregnant once more. Max sold my engagement ring and record collection (not that I had anything to play them on) for the train fare to Nelsprnit. CHAPTER 17

The babies and I stayed with Mom and Dad for a few weeks whilst Max, who had joined the Railways, went on a course to become a Station Foreman. His first posting was at

Barberton. We boarded with a Shunter who worked at the Fruit Siding until our house became available.

With our first month's pay we bought some furniture, a second hand double bed, a single bed for Gary and a cot for Rory. We also bought a second hand fridge and a round slatted dining room table and chairs. Later we bought a small cane lounge s-uite comprising of a two seat couch, two chairs and a coffee table. For all this, we paid cash. For the first time in my life with Max, I actually felt quite well off.

This was in 1967 when Dr Chris Barnard did the first heart transplant. It was in the newspapers and over the radio news for weeks. We didn't have transport at this time as

Max had traded the Kombi in for a VW Beetle at some stage between Durban and Cato

Ridge. The Beetle blew its engine and had to be towed to a garage. At that time we did not have the finances to have it repaired or to pay for the towing fees. The garage sold the Beetle to defray expenses.

I used to get a lift into Nelspruit and spend a day or two with Mom, which gave me the opportunity to see the Doctor for my checkups.

I made friends with the woman over the road and we got together every afternoon at 2.30 p.m. sharp to listen to "Die Geheim van Nantes" on Springbok Radio. I listened to that program for years and never did find out what "die geheim" was. The time was drawing near to my next confinement and I relived the trauma I had gone through with Rory. I went for a check up and had developed a rash all over my body, which my Doctor said was a nerve thing, and asked what I had to be nervous about.

When I told him what had happened with Rory, he laughed and said "Don't worry my dear, I won't cut you while you are alive." Because I had so much faith in him, the rash disappeared. We made a date for the operation, but I couldn't get it right even now, could

I? I went into labour anyway. At least this time my Doctor didn't let me suffer for thirteen hours. A different kind of suffering came later.

I was in a private ward and while I was waiting for them to bring my baby to me, I overheard a Doctor and a sister chatting in the passage outside. She remarked on the number of deliveries he had had that day and he said "Ag ja, you can just call me Cookie ) van der Merwe. I found this so funny, but I couldn't laugh, I was too sore.

I thought it strange that the nurses kept making excuses why they couldn't bring my baby to me. After waiting for hours and entertaining the most fearful thoughts, my Doctor arrived and told me that Tim (named by Penny and Max) was in an incubator. He was born with collapsed lungs, but was doing well. He also told me how he had to leave me on the operating table and call someone else to sew me up, while he blew air into my poor baby's lungs. What a doctor. He saved my baby's life.

Tim was in hospital for nearly three months, it was very hard for me at that time, waiting for his lungs to develop properly before he could come home. I was in Barberton and he was in Nelspruit. Lifts were scarce, so I had no way of getting there to check his progress for myself. I phoned the hospital every day, but that was a very long process.

60 You had to book a call through the exchange and that could take anything up to three hours before

61 you got through. Some days I would get so depressed that by the time the call came through, I couldn't speak. I would just lift the receiver and put it back down again, go into the dining room and cry my eyes out. One day Gary came into the dining room and saw me crying. He patted me on the knee and said "Don't cry Mommy". It broke my heart being consoled by a two and a bit year old. On these days Max would come home and ask ifl had phoned. When I'd tell him I tried, he would tell me I just didn't care. I was too miserable at the time to dwell on this, but thinking about it now, I realize that he was just an insensitive bastard, who didn't have a clue.

At last the day came when we could bring Tim home. We went to show Mom her new grandson. She was always such a proud granny. Unfortunately she had company, her drinking buddies. Mom could turn very nasty with a couple of drinks in her. The feud between Mom and Max erupted and we left on unfriendly terms.

When we finally arrived home with the tiny baby, and tiny he was, he only weighed 6 lbs.

I removed his blankets like unwrapping a present. Gary stood by in awe. When the unwrapping was done, Gary said "Ooh, the tiny baby has got a head." I couldn't have explained very well what a tiny baby was. I would have loved to have known what he thought it was.

The cold treatment between Mom and us lasted until Christmas, when Penny and Ivan brought Mom and Dad through to Barberton to spend the day with us. We kissed and made up. Mom had gone to town on presents for the boys. She bought the four older boys each a fluffy dog that worked on batteries to make the head nod and the tail wag, and the dogs bark. The boys were enthralled. With all the moving, I had started so many gardens, and I never saw the fruit of my labours, so I wised up and started planting plants in pots. After Tim came out of hospital

I felt quite settled in Barberton. Things looked on the up and up for once, but again it didn't last as Max was transferred to Bosoord. Shortly before we left for Bosoord, Max bought a second hand Mercedez Benz.

Back on the move again, we swapped the Electric Fridge for a paraffin model, packed the dinner service and a few other items. The Pantechnicon came and loaded up the few sticks of furniture, a couple of boxes and a very large number of potted plants. Off we went, back to candles and paraffin lamps.

Tim wasn't doing very well on the Formula the hospital told me to use. He brought up two out of every three feeds I gave him. I changed to Cow's milk and he thrived.

Bosoord was just a siding and was eleven miles from Lydenburg, so by the time the milk arrived from there by train it was sour, so we bought Daisy, the cow.

Daisy was a Jersey, a very tame and lovable animal. She used to wander around the yard and keep the grass short. She gave lovely, rich, creamy milk. I used to have to skim the cream off and dilute the milk for Tim. I even tried making butter, which worked out quite well. The excess milk I sold for five cents a pint. I had a worker who came to milk Daisy in the morning and afternoon. I had an argument with him and he left. I don't know how I always got into these predicaments. Here I was left with Daisy. Max couldn't milk her because he was working dayshift 6.00 to 6.00, so what the hell, I took two buckets, one to sit on and one for the milk. I sat down under Daisy and got started. She was very patient and never moved. I didn't have to tie her up or anything like that. It took me hours the first time, but then I got the knack and was A for away. I didn't need help after all. There were only two houses at Bosoord, very close to the railway line, ours and the nightshift foreman. While he was sleeping during the day, his wife was soliciting in the crudest form for the night. It ended up with all the Railway staff talking about "that woman at Bosoord". I was devastated, because I was also a woman at Bosoord. Max complained to the Station Master at Lydenburg and within days they were transferred somewhere else, hopefully far away from a railway line.

I went to visit Penny at Fairland. Penny worked for Jays which was a Fashion House, designing and making ladies clothing for the trade. Penny would come home with bags of off-cut materials from the factory, which could be bought for a song. It was astonishing what I managed to make out of those off-cuts. The larger pieces made dresses, some table cloths, and the smaller pieces made shorts and shirts for the boys.

It was time to go back home after this productive holiday and Penny and Ivan would drive me home. We were no sooner out of Johannesburg, when a red light lit up the dashboard. Although we mentioned it several times, Ivan studiously ignored it, and the next thing there was a clunk, clunk as the piston went through the block! What a fiasco.

We were on a down hill and freewheeled on to the forecourt of a garage with a Wimpy restaurant. Ivan made a call to his Dad and we waited for him to come all the way from

Johannesburg to fetch them and to take me the rest of the way home. Penny told me that

Ivan had been after a new car the moment their one was paid off. She however insisted on them having a year free of car payments. She was sure that his ignoring that light was deliberate.

From Bosoord we were transferred to Izingleweni. It took me weeks to even pronounce the name. Izingleweni was a little siding twenty nine miles inland from Port Shepstone. The only thing that made me sad about leaving Bosoord was selling Daisy. I loved that cow! CHAPTER 18

Things were looking up for us at last. Max was still in the same job and had been for over a year, which was a record. We had a car and furniture and the job relieved Max of his wanderlust, by transferring him every six months or so. Port Shepstone was the closest town to Izingleweni and that was where we did all our shopping. We went there to do our

Christmas shopping, Max wasn't feeling well, so we went to see the Doctor and Max collapsed in the waiting room. He was rushed off to hospital, with a bad case of Yellow

Jaundice

There I was, stuck in Port Shepstone, with three children, a car load of Christmas shopping and no driver's licence. I didn't want to take the chance of being caught, as being the day before Christmas the roads were teeming with traffic police.

I went to the Police Station and explained my plight. They were ever so obliging. They assigned one Policeman to drive our car, and another to follow and bring him back to Port

Shepstone, after delivering me, the children and all our baggage to Izingleweni.

It was a scorching, hot day, and that trip took forever. Max had been tampering with the engine of the car (never could leave well enough alone). He had changed the fuel line from the back of the motor to the front. The heat from the engine caused the fuel to evaporate before it got to the carburettor, so the car stalled every couple of miles. Then we had to wait for the engine to cool down, which took time, because it was such a hot day. What delightful fellows those two Policemen were. They never got aggravated, but just laughed and joked about it all the way. Thank goodness I did not attempt to drive to

Izingleweni on my own. When we got home the pair of them off loaded the car for me, had a beer, wished me a Merry Christmas and were on their way.

Inabout May 1968 we were transferred to Park Rynie. We spent the first night in the

Hotel, while waiting for our furniture etc to arrive. When we moved over to the house, we discovered that we had left Tim's bottle behind at the hotel. We never replaced it and that was him weaned. The children and I really loved it there. A wonderful view of the beach and sea could be seen from every window in the house except for the bathroom. We walked over the railway line and were on the beach. There was a tidal pool right opposite our house. We used to go down in the early morning and see some fantastic sea creatures that had washed into the pool at night. The baby octopuses were too cute and there were many other colourful creatures. We built sand castles, collected shells that normally landed up all over the floors inthe house. The three children sure could make a mess. My

Uncle Ken arrived one day to see Mom who happened to be visiting. Mom and I had just come back from the beach and were sitting on the front verandah, enjoying the view*. Ken _ just walked in, (nobody locked doors inthose days) and all we heard was this voice saying "Good grief, don't you ever clean your house". He had crunched his way through and over all the shells and sand.

The Station Master who lived next door had a greenhouse. When he was transferred I bought it lock, stock and barrel for just R50.00. With all the plants I had collected from all the places I had been, I now had quite a selection. Max built me a second greenhouse out ofreeds and soon this was also full. African Violets and Fems did extremely well in the Reed greenhouse. This was how my little nursery business started. Max traded the

Mercedez in for a Taunus bakkie which came in very handy for carting plants around.

We met the Manager of the Checkers' Malvern Store, who lived in Scottborough, which was the next Town to Park Rynie. We made an agreement that I would place plants in his shop on a consignment basis. This worked very well for a while. I used to take stock and replace plants on a weekly basis. The space I had been given in Checkers was very small, which meant I had to do the trip more often. The manager then got permission from Head

Office for me to display the plants at the entrance. We partitioned a section with trellises.

Then we erected shelves, got seeds, garden tools and plant pots on consignment and had space for a few bags of potting soil and compost, as well as a lot more plants. We paid

Checkers 10% of the gross takings.

This, of course, meant that I had to go to Malvern every day to run the business. Most days, I would catch a lift from Scottborough with the Manager. I still did not have a driver's licence. One morning, on our way to work, we heard on the radio, that the

Americans had landed on the Moon. Itwas all very exciting and the topic of conversation for weeks.

I had to go to Urnzinto for my driving licence test. I went twice and failed both times.

The Policeman that took me for the test was a real nit picker; he failed me the first time for turning the wheels while the car was still stationery, and the second time for coasting to the stop street. I couldn't find either rnisdemeanour in the book, so decided that whatever I did, he was still going to fail me, so I never went back. I carried on driving without a licence. Usually it was only from Park Rynie to Scottborough to catch my lift, but on the days I needed to take plants to Malvern, I drove there too. My little Garden Shop was doing very well. I caught all the traffic passing in and out of

Checkers. It was so nice speaking to lots of people, after living in remote places for years.

Max was transferred to Reunion, which was closer to Durban, opposite the airport. That was when he started getting out of hand again and decided he'd had enough of the

Railways and wanted to go into Landscape Gardening. CHAPTER 19

Max resigned from the Railways and we moved to Malvern. The house was on a five acre plot in the centre of Malvern, a couple of blocks away from Checkers, which was the only good thing about it. The house was in a terrible state. The paint was peeling off the walls and ceilings. The kitchen cupboard doors were either missing or hanging askew.

There were no built in cupboards in the bedrooms and it had wooden floors with a cellar underneath the house, and oh my goodness, sand fleas again! Even our barn in

Phalaborwa was better than this. After living in decent railway houses for nearly two years, this really was the pits.

I looked at the place in horror, and dreaded the thought of what I would have to do to make the place livable. The peeling paint had to be scraped off the walls and ceilings, before you could even lift a paintbrush to any of them. The floors had to be washed with power paraffm to get rid of the fleas, and because of the cellars under the house this was a mammoth job.

I hired two workers and we did all the scraping and the painting, which made a huge difference to the appearance of the rooms. I decided to paper one lounge wall with

Hessian and Max said he would do it. There he was, this very talented man, trying to put wall paper paste onto the Hessian. It was a very old house with picture rails, so I told him not to be stupid but to take thumb tacks and tack the Hessian to the picture rail. As Hessian is porous all he had to do was take the roller and roll the paste onto it. A solution far too easy for his complex brain, Then we got stuck into the garden. It was a five acrejungle and space had to be cleared to put up my greenhouses. I wondered if I was doing all this hard labour for myself or for someone else again. I wasn't very enthusiastic about it, but it had to be done. After the two workers and I started clearing the jungle, we found buildings down at the bottom end of the property which may have been stables at one time. The garden was terraced and these buildings were at the bottom of the fourth terrace. That was where we put up the greenhouses. I bought rolls of shade cloth and creosoted gum poles and we put up another massive greenhouse. We even had electricity down there, which was a piece of flex running from the house. I bought well established plants from other nurseries that could be split up and I propagated plants from slips and seeds. I eventually had hundreds of plants.

It was when my luck ran out and I got a massive traffic fine of R20.00 that I decided it was time to get my Driver's Licence. I went to the testing grounds in Pinetown and had to reverse park between two beacons. Those beacons had been set up for a Mini Minor, so when I reversed my rear view mirrors knocked both beacons down. The policeman had only seen the one side of the car, so I pointed out to him the other side and he agreed with me that the space was inadequate. Unfortunately my car was giving trouble at that time and kept stalling, so the policeman suggested I come back in a different car. I went back to Malvern and I borrowed a VW Beetle from the friendly Estate Agent in the Checkers complex and went back to the testing grounds, but the licensing department was closed.

We tried again the next day. The policeman who had taken me the day before was busy with another test, so summoned another policeman to attend to me. To my horror, I saw it was the nitpicker from Umzinto! The first Policeman told him not to bother testing the

7 0 reverse parking as I had already done and passed that. We went out for a drive and I had to stop and pull away on a hill; go around a traffic circle, etc. I was very meticulous and strived not to make any errors. Those were the days of hand signals and I never omitted one. I passed my licence at last.

Gary became good friends with Jasorrand we met Jaso's parents Vic. and Harriet.

There was a group of us that got together once a month for a party. After one of these parties, one of the guests stayed overnight. The next day I took the bedding off the bed, folded it and put it on top of a tallboy that stood next to the window, in the children's room. The following morning I smelt smoke but as Max was smoking in bed, I didn't take much notice. Gary came into our room and told us, quite casually that their room was burning! Rory had set a magazine alight that was on the window sill. That spread to the curtains, which fell down onto the tallboy and the bed, engulfing everything in flames. Rory and Tim were just standing there watching the flames. The old house had wooden floors and was in danger of burning down. We chased the children out of the room, grabbed buckets, which we filled with water from the adjacent bathroom and fortunately doused the flames.

We were always broke, and now I had lost bedding, mattress and curtains and had another costly mess to clean up.

To try and keep the boys, especially Rory, from getting into this sort of scrape, we acquired a dog. This was a sausage dog called Willie. Willie had no sooner moved in when the cat had kittens in one of the doorless kitchen cupboards. Max had never got around to putting one on. Willie was absolutely fascinated by the kittens and would take the mother cat's place whenever she left them. He never left their side, kept them warm,

71 and guarded them. I thought Willie mistakenly thought he was a cat. One day Willie got ill. I could not afford Vet fees, so gave him antibiotics I had got for one of the boys' they worked and he recovered in no time.

On a hot summer Sunday the group of friends went down to the beach. One of the gang was horsing around putting sea sand in everyone's mouth. With a mouthful of sea sand, I ran into the sea laughing. I had a denture with four front teeth. These teeth had broken away from the plate and I had stuck them back with a fixative. I could not afford to go to a dentist and as usual, had to make a plan. Well my homemade fix didn't stand me in good stead and my teeth dropped out into the sea. My friends teased me unmercifully, by demanding a "Colgate" smile. Monday morning saw me at the dentist on opening time.

He told me a replacement would take a week. I was desperate and told him I would find another dentist even if it meant going door to door. . He saw my distress, so made impressions and told me to come back later that afternoon. I spent the day in a tearoom bioscope watching the same two movies over and over again. I took out a cigarette and the man sitting next to me struck a match to light it. I was surprised to find he was my next door neighbour.

Vic and Harriet decided to return to Canada and they crated all their furniture, sold their car and in their last weeks I lent them my car to get around with. Vic had a Point 22 pistol and said he would have problems taking it out of the country, so gave it to me as a gift before they left. I was very sorry to see them go as we had become very good friends.

Max even thought of immigrating to Canada, but I knew we would never be able to afford to. so wrong. I lost all the passing trade I had at Checkers, and as most of the shops on the lower level were vacant, there was no passing traffic. Things just got worse and worse.

Max couldn't stand to lose an argument, so I gave up arguing with him and would just say "if you say so". Of course he knew immediately that I didn't agree with him and it made him as mad as anything, but there was very little that he could do about it. So he would storm out of the house and either go for a drive or disappear into his garage.

Things were not going well at all. We had one sided arguments on a daily basis, I tried not to do this in front of the children but it didn't always work. One Sunday it was the same again, Max stormed out of the house into his garage and stayed there, until I sent one of the children to tell him lunch was ready. He came in looking very pleased with himself. He had my occasional table in his hands that I had been begging him to fix for months. I couldn't even say "thank you," all I said was "high bloody time." With the result we didn't speak to each other for days.

74 CHAPTER 20

At about this time Gerald came into my life. There was a knock on the door one night and when I opened it, there was this stranger with the most beautiful brown eyes I had ever seen. He had eyelashes that any girl would have killed for. The thought flashed through my mind, 'Boy, if I get a chance, this is the one I am going to take'.

Max hitch hiked to Johannesburg and somewhere along the road Gerald gave him a lift.

Max told him where we lived and invited him to look us up if he ever came to Durban.

Aud that brought him to my door. Thank you Max.

Gerald then moved to Durban and became a regular visitor. He and his wife Cynthia used to come over in the evening and we would play a board game called "Risk". I knew he fancied me too, because he played footsie with me under the table and when he passed me the dice, he always managed to stroke my hand, which sent tingles right up my arm.

One weekend I wanted to go to a Nursery that was having a sale. Max was busy with something or other and Gerald was visiting. Max asked Gerald to take me there. We spent hours browsing and making a selection of plants. Gerald was quite knowledgeable and appreciated all the plants. Among my purchases were two han.o,ing plants which I decided to hold in the car so that they would not get damaged. As we were driving Gerald quipped "with a plant in each hand you are vulnerable. What would you do ifl kissed you"? I replied "try that and you will have a plant on each ear". I planted about twenty rose bushes on each of the terraces. Gerald helped by digging the holes, and also with the planting. When they came into bloom the fragrance was breathtaking. The banter carried on for a couple of months, but Cynthia didn't like Durban and missed her family in Johannesburg, so they moved back there.

The night he came to say goodbye, Penny and Mom were visiting me. Gerald got me in the passage and was just about to give me a kiss, when Penny came out on her way to the toilet. I was dashed, that puts paid to my first and last kiss, I supposed. I thought it was a chance missed.

The shop went broke and the landscaping down the drain. Max got ajob with Lely SA selling farm implements all over Natal. He would be away from home sometimes for days at a time. This suited me down to the ground and I was very happy when he was away. I got ajob at Henwoods, in West Street, in their gardening department and I used to help out on the Hardware side when I wasn't busy. One day a fellow came in and asked ifl had any Vices. I said "Yes, which would you like to know about." He didn't expect that, blushed blood red, but enjoyed the humour. I ended up selling him the biggest Bench Vice we had.

Whilst doing his landscape bit, Max got into quite a lot of debt. I got to the stage where I would rather face the Jehovah Witnesses, than the Messenger of the Court. He always came very early in the morning, or late in the afternoon, and delivered enough summonses to paper a couple ofrooms in the house. We eventually became quite friendly and he would come in for a cup of coffee. A couple of times he phoned me at

Henwoods and told me to leave my Anti-nuptial Contract on the fridge, as he was coming to attach the furniture the next day. He couldn't do this because according to the anti-nuptial contract, (thanks to Dad) the furniture was mine. Max used to send me to the

76 lawyers to sort out his summonses and beg a payment plan. Why I don't know, because he never

77 paid anyway. I think I had been to every lawyer in town. When I saw the same lawyer for the second or third time, he asked me how I was married and whose debt it was.

When I told him, he told me to get out of his office and to tell my husband to come and sort out his own debts. How humiliating!

Then one night it really happened. Max was on a trip selling farm implements and I was alone at home with the boys. It was quite late when Gerald arrived unexpectedly. What a lovely surprise. It was the first time I had seen him since they left Durban. He never did let me know that he was coming as we didn't have a phone. He came in and I think he was very happy to hear that Max was away for the night. He went back to the car and came in with a bottle of brandy and a family sized Coke. I didn't drink at all in those days but he convinced me to have a couple of drinks with him, which went straight to my head. Then he kissed me. Wow! What a kisser. It was like an electric shock and I was really turned on. Our clothes disappeared like magic (and I always thought sex was overrated and only meant a bath afterwards. Well I was wrong.) I had my frrst ever, second and third orgasm in minutes. Itwas absolutely wonderful and he had me begging for more. What a lover, I didn't know what I'd been missing all these years. We had fantastic, wonderful, fulfilling sex until the early hours of the morning. He didn't realize that he didn't need the brandy to seduce me. I'd been waiting for this for a long, long time. Gerald left the next morning and went back to Johannesburg. When Max got home that night I told him Gerald had popped in and was very sorry to have missed him. Liar!

After that, Max's sarcastic remarks were like water off a duck's back. I had my own little secret to keep me happy. There was no way I was going to reveal all by getting into a fit of temper. CHAPTER 21

I used to work all day at Henwoods, and then spend hours in the greenhouse and sometimes not come out of there until midnight. Thank goodness for Katerina, she was wonderful, did all the mundane things like cleaning, washing and cooking, and she adored the children. By the time I got home, they were bathed and fed and my supper was waiting. I would read them a story, put them to bed and disappear into the greenhouses.

Max hated it but by this time I really didn't care.

One day I came home from work and there was a lot of activity going on. Workers were pulling down and rolling up shade cloth, digging out poles and carting plants and loading them onto a truck. I asked Max what the hell was happening. He said he needed money desperately, so had sold the whole lot for a measly R500. The shade cloth alone had cost me four times that much, not to talk about the poles, the overhead mist sprayers and my thousands of plants. I was devastated. He had not only sold my nursery, he had sold my soul. I never forgave him for that, and mourned my nursery, like a mother mourns a child.

Shortly afterwards Gerald pitched up. After the visit, he told Max he was leaving for

Johannesburg, but didn't The next day I made some excuse at work and took the day off

We met on the beach front, and then we travelled up the North Coast until we found a very secluded beach. There we literally made fireworks all day! Itwas bliss. I never knew sex could be so satisfyingly exhilarating. We carried on like this for months, with Gerald coming down to Durban every four or five weeks. He would spend a day or two and then go back to Johannesburg. Then things got more difficult. Gerald had an accident and his car was a write off But that didn't stop him. He used to hitch hike to Durban to come and see me. I couldn't get enough of

Gerald and he, of me. Who, in their right mind, would hitch all the way from

Johannesburg to Durban for a bit of nookie. Not having transport meant I did not see him quite as often. That made it all the more exciting and passionate when I did.

Max started playing the horses. His father, Charlie, had always been a great punter. Max wasn't very good at picking winners and his gambling just made us more poverty stricken. I told him that if he didn't quit gambling, I was going to quit my job. He didn't and I did.

I used to take the children to the beach by car. One day I couldn't find the car keys despite searching the whole house. I took a walk up to my friend Magda and mentioned the loss of the keys. She told me that Max had told her that he was going to take the keys as he didn't like the fact that I was able to do as I pleased. I took the children to the beach by bus anyway. We only got home well after Max. He wanted to know where we had been. I told him we had gone to the beach as usual, but because he had taken my keys, we had to take the bus. That taught him that I would do my own thing anyway.

Magda's brother, Gerrie took me to the market one Saturday morning because my Taunus didn't have brakes and had bald tyres. On the way back from the market, coming up

Jacobs Ladder, his car suddenly stopped. He couldn't get it going again. We decided that he would go to my house to get the Taunus to tow us back home. We could use his car's brakes to stop the Taunus. He hitchhiked back while I waited for hours for his return. The reason for the delay was catastrophic. He had reversed the Taunus out and was swinging it around when because of the down sloping terraces and no brakes, it ran out of control, down terrace one, then two, then three and finally at four was stopped by a guava tree!

The only casualty of this helter skelter ride was a broken side window. It took him and the gardener quite a while to untangle the mess and push the car back up to the top terrace. My long wait was ended when I saw a red car coming fast towards me. He was going too fast to stop, so went whizzing past and slowed down on the next incline. Then did a U turn at the top of the next little uphill and came back to stop in front of his car. I don't know what he did, probably had his foot on the clutch, but the Taunus rolled back into his car. We managed to untangle the two, get the tow rope into place, then I towed him back to the house and managed to bring it to a stop. So after a harrowing morning, we were home and safe.

Max had left Lely and was now working for the Automobile Association, selling subscriptions and third party insurance. It was through the AA that Max met the owner of a little company called Insurex. The owner wanted to sell and Max talked Charlie, who had just retired from the Railways, into buying Insurex for him to run. All went well for a while.

80 CHAPTER 22

I was going to visit Mom and Dad at Airlie and my sister Penny, in Nelspruit. My friend,

Magda was going with me. We decided to leave on Saturday morning. Who should pitch up on Friday night, but Gerald. No doubt what he had come for. I could not cancel my trip or Max would have become suspicious. Max went to take a bath and Gerald and I made plans. We agreed that he would say he had to be back in Johannesburg for Monday so had to leave on Saturday and as I was going that way, I would give him a lift as far as

Ladysmith. Max put a spanner in the works by saying he was going to Johannesburg on the Sunday and would take Gerald all the way. What a bummer. We had to revert to Plan

B. Gerald would go with Max to Johannesburg and then hitch hike to Nelspruit. I gave him Penny's phone number, to phone me when he got there.

Magda, the children and I left early on Saturday morning for Nelspruit. It was the first time Magda had been out of the Province of Natal, so she enjoyed the change of scenery on the way. We arrived at Penny's house in the early afternoon. It was lovely seeing them all again. Ivan had left the Construction Company as t.'.1.e boys were at school going age and they felt they needed to settle down. They bought a lovely house and both Penny and

Ivan had good jobs and they were really happy to be back in Nelspruit.

On Sunday afternoon Penny's phone rang and it was a call from Pietermaritzburg. Penny called and said it must be for me and so it was. Gerald and Max were on their way to

Johannesburg when they hit a very large dog. The car was so damaged that it had to be towed. Gerald then got another lift and disaster struck again. They had an accident and the car rolled. Gerald and the driver were unscathed, but landed up in Grey's Hospital to F . be checked out. ;l'Ee said that as soon as he was fmished at the hospital he would be on the road to me. Penny was very suspicious about that phone call and wanted to know why

Gerald had phoned and not Max. I just shrugged my shoulders and said I didn't know.

The day passed without any word from Gerald. On Monday morning Penny and Ivan went to work. Magda and I were in the house with my boys and Penny's little Ona. I was playing a game of patience, and said to myself, if this works out, he will phone, if it doesn't he won't be coming to Nelspruit after all. It had been 18 hours since the call from Pietermaritzburg.

I hadn't even finished the game when the phone rang. Gerald said he was in Ermelo, standing opposite the Town Hall and that he couldn't walk another step. I told him to wait right there. I asked Magda to please watch the children and I would see her later. I didn't tell her where I was going, I was so happy that he had actually made all that effort to be with me. I think I broke every speed limit to be with him.J;-- "' Within an hour I was in Ermelo. Shame the poor beggar looked dead beat after being up all night. As soon as we got out of Ermelo he got his second breath and just wanted to find a place to stop. There were fields on either side of the road but no vegetation dense enough to be secluded. I couldn't find anywhere and he couldn't keep his hands off me. I could scarcely drive. We finally booked in to the Bambi Motel, which is about fifty miles from Nelspruit. We made it to the bed and made passionate love, then in the shower and back in the bed. By eight o'clock I said I really had to get back to Nelspruit as nobody knew where I was and they would be worried about me. He begged me to phone Penny and make some excuse and stay the night. I couldn't even think of a story to explain my absence during the day, let alone a whole day and night. I dropped Gerald off at a Service

Station on the Highway, as I pulled away he looked so forlorn standing there I wanted to cry

On the way home I thought I would say I'd been to see my friend who lived over the road in Barberton and was sorry I was so late in coming back but you know the delays in phone calls. I couldn't get through and it would take less time to drive back to Nelspruit -if' than to wait for the call to come through. Penny didn't believe a word of it; but had no option but to accept my excuse.

We spent a few days with Penny, and then went to Airlie to visit Mom and Dad:"T' hen it· was tlas 1G1:ig mp hems agam. Qllite ffil eveRtful twe v1'eeks. Dad had retired and bought a little Trading Store at Airlie. He hired a house from the railways that was directly across the road from the shop. It was the typical brick house that the Railways built in those days, with a verandah around three sides of it. Mom had cane furniture on the verandah as well as a dart board and she and Dad spent many an hour vying with each other at the game. They played for money on the game and kept score with chalk right on the red bricks. No money ever changed hands.

Mom also always had her portable radio tuned in to Springbok Radio. She entered every competition they had and was very lucky to win quite a few'. We often discussed the various serialised stories in our letters to each other. In one of my letters to Mom and

Dad I had said it was a shame that one of the characters had died, Dad had opened the letter and read it first. He went to Mom and worriedly asked her who this person was that had died. When she told him it was a radio story character he laughed and asked if we didn't have anything better to write about. CHAPTER 23

Max carried on playing the horses and I decided that if you can't beat them, join them. I used to go to the races at Greyville, Clairewood and sometimes to Scottsville in

Pietermaritzburg. I would always bump into Charlie there. He taught me a lot about how to work out the form of a horse and who the best jockeys were. I enjoyed the races tremendously and now understood why Max was so addicted. I never ever made heavy bets though, just a one rand win or place and I played the Place accumulator. For the

Place accumulator, you had to have a horse run in a place in each of the last seven races.

There were nine races each day. I went to a Wednesday race meeting once and had a

Place Accumulator running. I had a place in five races, with only two to go. It was so exciting. In the next race I got a place again. In the last race of the Place Accumulator, I screamed the horse home, and was hoarse for days. I had actually won a Place

Accumulator. They never announced the Place Accumulator pay out on the day. You had to wait for the newspaper the next morning. I couldn't wait. I was at the garage where they delivered the papers at six the next morning. I was so excited, but when I saw what the pay out was, I could have cried. It only paid R7.80. Charlie had to explain to me that the Place Accumulator only paid out big money when the outsiders came in, and of course, I had all the favourites.

Gary started school and loved it. He was the smallest child in the school and was made the school mascot. He adored his teacher, a Miss Rogers and I didn't stand a chance. It didn't matter what I said, it would always be "But Miss Rogers said". I had to give up and let Miss Rogers take over. At the end of the year when he passed into Grade two, we had tears and tantrums. He didn't want to go to Grade two. When I asked him why not, he said because Miss Rogers didn't pass and was staying in Grade one.

Rory was a handful. He got up to all sorts of mischief Max had a problem with his car, with water in the petrol. He must have drained the tank a half a dozen times and cursed every garage in town, before I caught Rory with a milk bottle, filling up the tank.

Itwas Max's own fault. He had lost the petrol cap and never replaced it. Rory really thought he was doing Max a favour.

Between Max and Rory, I could have killed the pair of them. Max had been doing something or the other and had left a saw, hammer and nails on the dining room table.

Rory got hold ohhis lot, hammered nails into the table and sawed the legs off of one of the chairs What was I to do with a negligent husband and a prospective handyman for a son?

Gary and Rory never got on from day one. They used to fight continuously. The French drain had got blocked up and Max got the gardener to dig it up. Here was this big hole full of pooh, just waiting for something to happen. I was watching the children play from the kitchen window, when I saw Gary standing on the edge of the hole, pretending to dive, by counting one, two .... On the count of three Rory pushed him in. He has been in pooh ever since!

Tim, on the other hand, was a sweet and loving child who never gave any problems and got on well with both his brothers.

Gerald had been to visit and we had one of our passionate and clandestine meetings at the cove on the North Coast. That man could make my toes curl and my body ache, the touch, the kiss and nibble and the final act of feeling him inside me was pure bliss. I think CLil\.18 EVERY MOUNTAIN

I really came alive when this gorgeous man came into my life. Why was he so far away and why did I have to wait so long for these little bits of magic in my life? Of course, no matter how often he reassured me, I never knew if this was the last time.

I met up with Charlie once, at a race meeting, just before the fifth race. There was a horse called 'Don't tell' running. It was a rank outsider and it was paying 100 - 1 on the tote. I fancied the name because of Gerald. Charlie asked me what I was going to back.

When I told him, he told me not to waste my money on that donkey. So I didn't back it and the donkey won! I was so sorry I had met Charlie before that race. In those days I was earning ninety rand a month, and that donkey paid more than my month's salary.

I went home and dyed my hair blonde. When Gerald saw me again, it was clear he didn't like the blond, so by the time he came again, I was back to my natural colour. So it carried on, each time wasn't the last time after all.

Insurex was a winner. Max made contact with a number of garages in Durban and offered the car salesmen a commission on any car insurance they could steer his way. This was very lucrative for both Insurex and the salesmen. Then there were the Third Party

Insurances that every vehicle had to have. Insurex did vast numbers of TPI' s and the commissions on them paid the rent, telephones and a receptionist. I thought, if things carried on in this way, there would soon be enough to pay Charlie back. The receptionist,

Maggie had a huge crush on Max, of which he took advantage, by having a brief affair with her. I couldn't have cared less. At least I didn't have to put up with his inadequate love making while this was going on. CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 24

Thank goodness the house was livable when Mom, Dad, Penny and Ivan, their boys,

Jonathan and Andrew and little Ona, came to visit for Christmas. They set off in a

Ford Station wagon with a roof rack holding the luggage. Ivan could not have secured

the

['() suitcases properly, as a car passed them and signalled for them to stop. The driver told m them that they had lost a suitcase some miles back. It happened to be Mom's and she

made a big story of it about how embarrassed she was to find her underwear spread all

over the road! On the way to Durban Mom kept looking over Ivan's shoulder and asking

"Aren't you gong too fast Ivan?" As they neared Durban Ivan took the wrong off ramp

and realized it a few yards along. He decided to reverse back onto the highway and this

time Mom kept egging him on with "Go faster Ivan, go faster!" She could be so funny.

That Christmas was a bumper one for our little family. The boys each got a bicycle and I

gave Max a smoking jacket. Rory managed to dismantle his bicycle on day one. He had

to find out how everything worked.

We adults went to a lovely Restaurant in St George's Street one night. We passed some

sailors on the way and we three women agreed that there was nothing more desirable

than a man in uniform. That set us off and we giggled all evening. The men never did

know what we found so amusing.

Then Max decided to expand the business and went mad. He rented more Office space,

bought Office furniture, Company Cars and employed Agents to sell Life Insurance. CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN H thought he was such a big deal. Before he did all of this I told him to wait a few e months until the short term side was more profitable. I don't think Max ever took my advice. He went ahead anyway. Come the month end, money was very tight with all the new overheads to pay. Things didn't look good and he had to draw some more money from poor Charlie. Fortunately Charlie had never signed any of Max's business deals. When

Charlie's fountain dried up, Max started using the Third Party Insurance premiums to keep the business afloat. The agents, there were two, who both had company cars, petrol allowances and basic salaries, weren't bringing in any business. Max was using more and more of the Insurance Company money. Then it was year end and the books had to be audited. The auditors had to report on their findings and that is when the house of cards came tumbling down. Insurex had to close its doors and yet another brilliant opportunity went west. Only this was worse than ever before, because there was an investigation and w consequences. Max was charged and thereJ\a case pending for some time in the future.

My car blew a head gasket. I begged Max to fix it, but he never seemed to get around to it. He, of course, was never inconvenienced. When I could no longer stand being without my car I decided to fix the car myself. I had been Max's spanner boy over the years so thought I could do it. And I did. My hands lost all their skin, but at least my car was . . gomg agam.

Having no income, we decided to seek our fortune in Johannesburg. We moved to

Eikenhof where Gerald and Cynthia were renting a plot. Max had told Gerald about our predicament, and Gerald, probably with an ulterior motive, suggested we join them. The intention was to start another Nursery, but it was another disaster as there was no

88 electricity or running water. There was a borehole with a hand pump on the property, but the water wasn't any good being full of rust. We had to cart drinking water from town.

89 The whole set up was just awful. The lack of electricity didn't bother me, but the water problem did. Bathing in that rusty water that had turned black after heating on the gas stove was gross, you just never felt clean and the clothes washing was a real problem.

The only advantage was, that Gerald who still didn't have transport, worked in

Alberton, which was a distance away from Eikenhof and I took him to work in the mornings and fetched him in the evenings. So we got to spend some time alone together.

Max and Gerald went out one Sunday afternoon. When it was getting late, Cynthia and I bathed the children, fed them and put them to bed. That took all the water we had pumped. Then we went out and pumped buckets of the rusty water for our baths later. I don't know which was worse, having the first shallow bath, or the one topped up with water and bathing in someone else's dirt. We used to play matches to see who would bath first. As the men had still not come home and it was getting very late, Cynthia and I played the match game. I won. I was still in the bath when they came home. I got out and

Max got in. He was in a foul mood. I was busy brushing my teeth when he said "wash my back." I said I would when I was fmished. He said "I said now" and I told him he could go to hell. He stood up and slapped the toothbrush right out of my mouth. He backed me into the comer and slapped my face from side to side so that my head kept hitting the wall. I had a nice big egg on either side. I didn't stand still, but gave him a few good, deep scratches with my nails, my only means of defence. I was furious. I shouted

"I'll kill you, you bastard", grabbed a towel and made for the bedroom and my gun.

Max didn't know how close he came to dying that night. He was lucky, Gerald, hearing the commotion, got to my gun first and removed the magazine. I was so angry; I would have CLil\ffi EVERY MOUNTAIN shot Max and been the one to land up in jaiL Oh how I hated him. Even when he cried and said how sorry he was, all I felt was contempt.

Things couldn't carry on this way. We started looking for other alternatives. Inthe end

Gerald and Cynthia moved to Rosettenville and we rented another house in Eikenhof, with at least, clean running water, but still no electricity. You can say that the most of my life with Max was spent in the dark.

90 CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 25

There was a little girl at Gary's school who was very badly scarred. She had an unfortunate accident when she pulled a pot of boiling water over her face and chest. The children avoided her, but Gary befriended her. They lived close by and one day Gary asked me to take himthere to play. They had a white German shepherd who attacked

Gary and bit him on the arm rather badly. I had to take him to the doctor for an anti tetanus shot and stitches. Not long after, Rory was playing in a broken down truck that was on the property got his finger caught between the tailgate and the body. I had to rush himto the Doctor who put 11 stitches in just the tiny tip of his finger. I thought he was going to amputate that finger because it was such a mess. He did a brilliant job in saving it. The Doctor remarked "Helen, the only time I ever see you is when it is a self inflicted emergency." The joys of Motherhood! Mind you my boys were very rarely sick, only accident prone.

Max changed jobs like most men changed their pants. He really had the gift of the gab and never had to submit a CV or anything as formal as that, which would really have shown him up to be totally inconsistent. We were back in utter poverty once more, so I got ajob with Rave stores in the creditors department. At that the time, I didn't even know that Creditors were reconciled. The advertisement for the job said Reconciliation

Clerk, and I thought it was Bank reconciliations. Indesperation I went back and checked what my predecessor had done, and I soon got the hang of it. Initially I was terrified that my supervisor, Carol, would realize that I had never reconciled a creditor's statement in my life.

Gerald still came to visit us at Eikenhof, but we rarely had a chance of being alone together. Max, as I have indicated before, was a very jealous person and after the bathroom fiasco became even more so(He got ajob building-models -fora-Mini- towrrtlrey were...luilding-in-Rosetten¥illajHe was talented in so many different fields, only not in making a decent living. The site was near Rave Stores.

The creditors department at Rave was quite big with six clerks and a supervisor. At lunch time some of us would play Poker for matches. Max was always checking up on me and somehow managed to wangle his way into the game, so he was there every lunch time.

The girls thought he was so charming. Ifonly they knew. Meanwhile, I just hated his guts.

We had a Christmas Party for the staff of Rave. Spouses weren't invited and Max didn't want me to go. I argued that the bosses would not appreciate the staff ignoring their invitation, and went anyway. On my way home from the party, the Drive In was coming out, and with all the traffic, I missed the shortcut turn off to Eikenhof and went the long way round. When I got home, Max was waiting and he was furious. He wanted to know where I went to after the party. He had been sitting over the road and watching the building so saw me come out, and made it home before me. He had the habit of timing the time it took me to get home from work and ifl was ten minutes late I had to explain.

I stopped for petrol, or the traffic was bad and so on. I was so sick and tired of always explaining that one day I lost my temper and said "I was screwing on the island in the middle of Eloff Street"! That shut him up for a while. Rory was starting school in the January of 1972. He was so excited; he just couldn't wait for the day. Two weeks before school was to start he got chicken pox, so missed the first week of school. The poor child was so disappointed, he actually cried. He offered to pull his socks over his knees so no one would see the spots. I think that was the longest week of his life.

Gary had taken swimming lessons the previous year, so when we went swimming in the round concrete dam on the property, he was the one I didn't worry about. We used to lie on the rafts in the dam and tan in the sun. The dam was difficulget out of because there were no steps. Suddenly, Rory called out "Gary is lying under the water." I jumped up to check and there he was lying motionless at the bottom of the dam which was about six feet deep. The only movement was his hair, gently floating in the water. I have never been so scared in my life. I dived in and got him and myself out of the dam without any assistance. Max was lying on the grass under the tree, I shouted at him to come and help me. Gary wasn't breathing. Max started giving him artificial respiration but after less than a minute wanted to give up. He said it was too late, the child was gone. I hit Max on the back and screamed "Carry on! Carry on!" Thank God he did because suddenly Gary gave a huge burp and brought up what seemed like gallons of water, and started breathing agam.

I ran over the field, jumped or climbed, I don't know how, the fences to get to the house to get the car. I was in such a state I couldn't get the car to move and kept spinning the wheels on the gravel. After I told myself to calm down, I drove around to the dam and

93 picked Gary up and rushed him to the South Rand Hospital. It seemed like a million miles away, but when we got there, they attended to Gary immediately and kept him under

94 observation overnight. Thankfully he didn't suffer any adverse effects, but I did. I had nightmares for months afterwards. What ifl hadn't have been with him and Max that day. CHAPTER 26

Byron and Daisx bought the plot next door and were going to build on it. They lived in

Hillbrow, but came out to the plot at weekends. Daisy and I became very good friends.

They also met Gerald who visited us nearly every weekend.

Life carried on with calls to work from Gerald and the very frustrating visits. Then came the huge turning point in my life.

In February, Max's court case came up. We had to go to Durban to attend the hearing in

Court. Max's lawyer was confident that he would only get a suspended sentence if he would plead guilty to the charges of misappropriation of Insurance monies. To our total dismay, that was not to be. The Magistrate saw it as fraud and theft and sentenced Max to two years in jail without the option of a fine. He was taken immediately from Court to

Durban Prison to be processed. They told me I could see him there intwo hours time.

I did this. We had very little to say other than he would let me know where they were sending him. I went to say a tearful goodbye to Charlie and left for Eikenhof on my own.

It was a terrible trip as the car blew the head gasket again. I spent a small fortune on

Barsleak and Indian head, two products that sealed the leak inthe gasket temporarily I picked up a hitch hiker, a very nice young American, who was delightful company. He was travelling around the world on his thumb. He told me all about America and I told him about the places I had been in South Africa. We finally arrived in Johannesburg in the middle of the night, after many stops to fill up with water and to check the petrol. He had nowhere to stay, so I offered him a bed for the night, for which he was very grateful.

The next morning I gave him a lift to Johannesburg on my way to work.

Now I had a new problem to face. Should I tell my boss about Max, orjust hope that they would never find out. I was really worried about losing my job, which I now needed more than ever. I decided that honesty was the best policy and told Carol all about it. She was absolutely fantastic. Instead of firing me, she gave me an increase and said that if she could help me in any way, I must just say. I was so relieved, I burst into tears. After the shock and drama of Max's incarceration I began to realize that now, I was actually free of his controlling ways. It felt wonderful!

Gerald had phoned during the day to hear if we were back from Durban. I couldn't tell him much, because of being in an open plan office, sojust told him that I came back on my own. Gerald arrived later that night. I fell into his arms and sobbed with relief. I was momentarily free of Max.

Gerald was so comforting that night. We practically ripped our clothes off. I was ready and waiting at once. It had been so long since he had physically held me and all our pent up frustration came pouring out and we reached a climax very quickly. Then followed a night of slow, sensual, touching, loving, stroking and kissing all over. He would bring me to a point just before climax and then stop, so that my whole body was throbbing for the want of him and then we would climax together. That man gave me the pleasure and satisfaction that was so missing in my life with Max.

Gerald and I fell into a pattern, he would come around two or three times a week, it wasn't just sex, we would got to the Drive In with a bottle of wine and just enjoy each others company. Inthe meanwhile I still corresponded with Mom, Penny, Charlie and Amelia. Penny was in Mariental and Amelia in Cape Town.

I met some wonderful people in my life, not many, as I was never in one place long enough to make deep friendships. Amelia was definitely one, she was my confidante and the only person who knew more about me, was Gerald; Every time I saw her she would say "can't wait for the next episode". Gerald, who was my comfort and joy and Charlie, who would write and say 'don't worry about your car instalment this month, I've paid it'.

He knew it would be a battle to support three children on my own. I only realized that I was actually supporting Max too, when my Salary went a lot further after he went to jail.

Then there was Carol, my boss, I was so touched when at Easter she bought my children

Easter eggs.

used to send me to various suppliers, to sort out accounts that were long outstanding and had for various reasons become problematic. For this, she organized that the firm paid for my mileage at AA rates, out of Petty Cash. This more than covered my costs and left me with spare cash to cover my own expenses.

After a while I got a letter from Max to say they had transferred him to Pretoria Central

Prison, and would I please come to see him. That was quite an experience. All those massive gates, I am surprised that anyone could escape from there without inside help.

During a very awkward conversation by telephone through a Perspex window, Max told me they were going to transfer him to Kroonstad the next week.

Gerald and I went to the Drive Inone night with our bottle of wine. I am sure it must have been two bottles of wine, because I was pretty tipsy when he said that the movie was a load of trash and let's go back to Durban where it all began. I agreed and we left halfway through the show. By the time we reached Heidelberg, I had sobered up and realized what we were doing. I told him to turn back as I had three children and ajob to think about. I might have felt free, but not to that extent. We went back home and made love instead.

I received a letter from Max confirming that he was now in the Kroonstad Prison and would I please visit him and bring some money for cigarettes. He never gave the cost of getting there a thought.

Gerald decided to come with me to Kroonstad and we went on a Sunday. Kroonstad was quite different from Pretoria and one saw the prisoners in a large room furnished with tables and chairs. We sat down and waited for Max. The first thing he said when he saw us was "did you bring the money?" I though Gerald was going to have an apoplexy, he went so white in the face, but he didn't say anything. We didn't stay long and on leaving

I handed Max R20. "Is that all" he said and I thought Gerald was going to throttle him. In his anger, Gerald did not mince his words, but told Max off in no uncertain terms. He told him that he had no clue as to what he had put me through; that he had not even bothered to enquire after the children; and that he was darned ungrateful for what I had no obligation to give him. Max was totally taken by surprise at the vehemence of Gerald's attack. If he ever questioned that our relationship was more than platonic, I have no idea, and by this time I was beyond being concerned.

On our way home Gerald asked me if I knew the song "Lord you gave me a mountain".

He said "well he gave you Everest, but you will reach the peak anyway. He then sang the song to me. He had a lovely voice and after that I made him sing for his pudding. He knew all the words to all the songs and there were many. My favourite was "I will follow CLIJ\1B EVERY MOUNTAIN you wherever you may go, there isn't a mountain too high or river so deep it can keep, keep me away from my love". The music and words evoked pure nostalgia.

I was happy in my job, ecstatically happy with my love life, the children were thriving

(they thought their father was in the army, being very brave!), but there was always the nagging feeling as to what was going to happen when Max came out of jail. Over the troubled times we had through the years I had often threatened to leave him and he would counter this with a threat of his own. He threatened to shoot me and the children. So when I got a letter from Penny asking me to come to Mariental, I really thought very seriously about it. It meant giving up Gerald, but he was married and our affair wasn't going anywhere. After discussing it with Gerald and shedding copious tears, as he was dead against it, I made up my mind. I was going. I only visited Max three times in

Kroonstad and on the third and last time, I told him I was going to South West Africa.

I didn't quite know how I was going to get there. I considered selling everything and taking the train, I had no idea how to implement this move.

Gerald made one last valiant gesture and told me that I was going nowhere unless he could take me there and see where I would be staying and that everything was safe and in order. CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 27

Penny had described the life in Mariental in her letter and she really had a way with words, it sounded like a fantastic place in which to live. I would be going there to start a new life with my boys. I believed I would be free of Max, I really did not think he would follow me to a neighbouring country. I had made it quite clear on my last visit to him in

Kroonstad that things were over between us.

Once the decision was made, I had so much to do. I resigned from my job with a very sad heart. I loved my work and got on so well with all the ladies. I then had to start packing, and to sell everything I was not going to take with me. I got a very good price for the furniture, but kept the bare essentials like beds, crockery and cutlery and of course, my beautiful dinner service. Gerald was a great help in bringing me boxes and newspapers for the packing.

We were ready to leave. Daisy and Byron came to see us off. I drove my little Colt 1100, with the children. It was a panel van, but we had taken the panels out and fitted windows when we first bought it. Ithad no back seats, but I had fitted a foam mattress in the back, which was perfect for the children. Gerald and an African helper drove a big blue truck containing all my earthly belongings.

We set off at 8.10 p.m. on a Thursday night. Gerald asked ifl had the map and told me I would have to 'stay sharp', or we wouldn't get anywhere. That 'stay sharp' was one of his favourite sayings.

100 Initially, he followed me, but then I would follow the truck with the large sign "William

and King Erection Department". I won't tell you the thoughts that went through my mind.

We passed many little towns and a few bigger ones, Schweizer Reneke; Vryburg; /

Fi:ttt uman-and-Bpi:rrgton. It was a slow journey, as the truck could only do between 60

and 80 kilometers an hour, and on the slightest incline, it would drop right down to 40

k.p.h.

Ioon-before-we-reaehecl-K-Masbtffg was dog tired and begged Gerald

to let us stop for just an hour's sleep. He told me to just stay sharp and we would get

there.

We started playing leap frog, just to stay awake. He would pass me and then I would pass

him and so on. At one stage I just keep on going. I forgot to slow down for him to pass.

When I eventually looked in the rear view mirror, I couldn't see his lights, so I stopped

and dozed until he caught up.

We passed through Keetmanshoop sometime during the night and knew that we were on

the last leg ofthis incredibly long journey. By this time I was so exhausted that I started

hallucinating, the truck had turned into a gypsy caravan and there was a huge white bear

waving out of the window. I also felt as if I was travelling through a tunnel of tall pine

trees. Pine trees in the south of that country? Only in my exhausted imagination!

The road was straight and you could see lights from many miles away. We were so happy

to see the lights of Mariental and to know we had ahnost made it, that it seemed

incredible that we still had about 50 kilometers and a nearly three quarter hour of driving.

We stopped at the first garage in town to ask for directions and the petrol jockey knew

10 1 exactly who Penny and Ivan were and where they lived. We arrived at their house at 3.30 on Saturday morning. Ivan, of course, was not enchanted by being woken up at that

10 2 ungodly hour and said "hello and goodnight" and went straight back to bed. Penny made

us coffee, helped me settle the boys, and retired. She had been briefed before hand as to

what the sleeping arrangements should be.

Gerald and I fell into bed and I whispered in his ear "I have been following that

Erection sign for so long .If you don't have one right now, I'll never forgive you!' He

was the most unselfish lover anyone could ever have. As always it was incredible and

we fell asleep in each others arms.

We awakened later that Saturday morning and decided to offload and then take a drive around the town. That took exactly five minutes. We ended up driving on the main road to Windhoek and discovered the Hardap Dam. We laughed and joked about finding diamonds on the side of the road. We stopped in a secluded spot, and just sat for a while, all hilarity now gone, and both of us with heavy hearts. I told him how much I was going

to miss him, and for the frrst time, he told me that he loved me. Itmade me cry, and when

I saw a tear on one of his beautiful long lashes, I really broke down and sobbed. How was

I going to live without this sensitive, sweet, tender and loving man .We just held each other and cried together. But the time had come for him to leave. Gerald had to get back

to Johannesburg and he faced that terribly long, exhausting journey with only his helper to keep him awake.

As I watched him drive off, I suddenly felt desperately alone and heartbroken, but for

once, I had done this to myself.

Mariental was not a metropolis by any manner or means. I actually wondered why Penny thought it was such a great place. It was only after a while that I got to appreciate the lifestyle there. Mariental was halfway between Keetmashoop and Windhoek. All the entertainers that came to perform in South West Africa would put on a show in

Keetmanshoop, then stop over in Mariental and do the same and finally perform in

Windhoek, so there was plenty of cultural entertainment. The main stars would stay at the

Hotel, but the others were farmed out to local families who had the accommodation. With three children at boarding school for most of the year, Penny and Ivan had guests throughout each year and we met very interesting people that way. The Lion's Club was very active and had a dinner dance once a month and there was the annual Agricultural

Show. The businesses were there to support the large farming community. Charney' s was a real emporium. They sold everything from a pin to petrol. There were even coffins on sale. Coming from Johannesburg I found the prices in Mariental were exorbitant. They were at least double that of prices in South Africa. There were two main roads and no robots. There was a library and a hospital. The best part was that with no TV in SWA, people visited each other all the time. One went to a dinner or a braai at least three times a week. The people were friendly, relaxed and generous in their hospitality.

The population was 99% Afrikaans, nearly point one percent German and Penny, Ivan and I the only English speakers. Whenever dignitaries were about to descent on Mariental

Penny and Ivan were approached to be the greeters and to find out if the guests could speak Afrikaans. Some of the business people spoke better English than they would acknowledge, but everyone seemed incredibly shy about using the language. The newly appointed Managing director of the Ford Motor Company, accompanied by other officials and their wives flew in for a visit, the owner of the Ford Dealership "borrowed"

Penny from the Municipality where she worked, to take the ladies to tea at Hardap. CHAPTER 28

Gerald was gone and I was worried about him on the road after having had so little sleep.

Ithad taken us 35 hours to get to Mariental and now he had to do the same all the way back. I worked it out, if he didn't stop to rest, he would get back home at about two on

Monday morning. How I agonized about that trip.

Penny had bought a creche for me. Penny said that she bought it so that her daughter would have a safe place to stay during the day whilst she was at work. Itwas very lucky for me and I was ever so grateful.

On Sunday I spent the day arranging our "flat" which was a very large room at the rear of the creche. I had brought some cupboards with me and we used them as a room divider, so that the boys had one room and I had the other. You then walked through another large room that was used for the creche children to have their afternoon nap in. It was furnished with cute little child sized wooden beds with foam covered mattresses and embroidered sheets and pillow cases. From there you went into the dining room-cum kitchen area, also very spacious. Off the kitchen, to the left was a large bathroom.

The playground outside had swings and a huge concrete pipe and didn't need a sand pit because there was not a blade of grass to be seen.

I never stopped worrying about Gerald. Finally everything was ready for Monday morning when I would meet the children and their parents. On Monday afternoon Gerald phoned as promised to say that he was home safe and sound and had even been to work.

At last I could relax after what had been a hectic and worrisome day. It took me a week or so to get into the routine of things, and to get to know the children.

The parents would start dropping them off from 6.30 in the morning and some would only fetch them at 6.30 at night. That made it a very long day. Breakfast was served to the children at 8.00 a.m. then they would play outside until snack time at 11.00 a.m. They then did drawing and colouring in, and other arts and crafts until lunch time at 1.00 p.m.

After lunch, the children were put down for an afternoon nap, preceded by a story to put them to sleep. When they woke up there was a snack, followed by playtime until about

5.00, when they were called in for a wash, a change of clothes and they were ready for their parents to collect.

The new school term was just starting and I took Gary and Rory to the local school to emol them. The Principal didn't want to take them because they couldn't speak

Afrikaans. He said I should send them to boarding school in Windhoek. We had a big argument and I told him I wasn't sending a 7 and 8 year old to boarding school, and if he :ii- didn't take them they just wouldn't go to school. He gave in and emolled them. At the end of the year they both passed Afrikaans and walked off with prizes for the best

English and Mathematics marks intheir class.

The boy's school was having a concert and Rory got the role of a Bee in one of the Acts.

I had to make him a costume. The material for the body of the bee was very slippery and hard to work with. I eventually resorted to putting it in the refrigerator freezer to get it stiff enough to sew on. It looked fantastic, the dark body and the gossamer wings were stunning. I was so proud of my achievement. But it was for Rory, and you know nothing went smoothly when Rory was concerned. He got mumps and never made the Concert! We had been in Mariental for about four months when I had this terrible hankering to see

Gerald. I decided to go to Johannesburg on the pretext of shopping. I arranged with the

woman Penny had bought the creche from to stand in for me for a couple of days. All the

locals gave me shopping lists. Goods were very expensive in South West Africa, so

everyone took advantage of a chance to get South African products.

Ivan was dead set against my trip. He was afraid my little car would never make the journey. I was determined to go, my car had made it to Mariental, so why not. He had just bought a brand new Ranchero bakkie and insisted that I use it instead. It only had 319 kilometers on the clock, so he made me promise to stop and have it serviced as soon as it reached 1500 kilometers. I left in the late afternoon, and it started getting dark as I neared

Keetmashoop, so I had to use the lights. I couldn't find the dipswitch. I turned every knob there was on that dashboard and had the wiper blades going hell for leather. All to no avail, I eventually had to stop and check the manual. The dipswitch was on the floor! I made it to Schweitzer Reyneke on the 1500 kilometer deadline at about 6.30 the next morning and had to wait for the Ford garage to open.

If I had known how long that Service was going to take, I would have booked into a

Hotel and had a sleep. Never the less, I sat in a little cafe over the road and had numerous

cups of coffee. I then went for a walk and found a telephone booth and phoned Gerald.

He was so excited when he heard my voice, and wanted to know where I was. I said "I

am in Schweitzer Reyneke, on my way to Johannesburg" and he said "for good?" I could

hear the disappointment in his voice when I said no. I told him I was having the bakkie

serviced and didn't know how long it would take, but should be in Johannesburg by late

afternoon. We made arrangements to meet at the Rissik Street Post Office at six. It didn't quite work out that way, as the car was ready very soon and I reached Johannesburg by three. I had hours to wait, so went to Rave, saw all the ladies and was invited to stay with

Barbara. She gave me her flat key and I went there and had a lovely refreshing shower and change, and I still had a couple of very long hours to wait. I left the key in the postbox as arranged and thought I would just drive around Johannesburg to while away the time.

Of course this meant a drive around the Rissik Street Post Office. It was about five and as

I turned the comer into Rissik street, there it was, the big blue truck with the lettering

Williams and King Erection Department! I quickly found a parking and as I got out of the bakkie, Gerald came rushing over the road. He had spotted me as I was parking. My legs turned to jelly and I thought my heart would burst. We hugged and kissed right there in the middle of Rissik Street.

Gerald had made arrangements with a friend to use his flat, but we had to wait until 9.00 p.m. We went to the Americana Roadhouse and had something to eat, then to the Drive

In. Charles Bronson was acting in the movie and he was one of my favourite actors, but

I saw nothing of the movie, as I fell asleep on Gerald's shoulder, and for once, he just let me sleep.

Back at the flat, I remember I was wearing a green and white dress made of a nylon material. As the dress came off, there was a lot of static. Sparks were flying everywhere, and they never stopped. It was a repeat of the first time, only better. Gerald knew my body so well and it didn't take him much time to take me to seventh heaven. I had orgasm after orgasm. The after play was even better than the foreplay. Kissing and cuddling and just being in his arms again. Oh how I had missed him!

107 I went back to Barbara's flat in the early hours, sneaked in without waking her and found a bed. I only woke up long after she'd gone to work. I did a bit of shopping during the day.

Gerald knocked off early on a Friday and we met at 4.00 p.m. We went to the same place we used to go to when I fetched him from work when we were all still at Eikenhof. We relived old times and made whoopee. As we were in the area we went to see Daisy and

Byron who were then renting my old house whilst theirs was being built. Daisy and I had been corresponding but she didn't know I was coming to Johannesburg and was very surprised and happy to see me. We spent some time with them, and then went back to

Barbara's flat. Of course it ended up in another amazing loving session. When Barbara got home from her date, Gerald left. At last Barbara and I had a chance to catch up. We had a few hours sleep and as she didn't work on Saturdays, we spent a few more hours together until Gerald arrived.

What marvelous days and heavenly nights. It was nearly at an end. Then Gerald and I had our first tiff. He wanted me to come back to Johannesburg and I said "I can't and you don't appreciate the fact that I have travelled all these miles just to see you".

"Yes", he said, "with a big six under your tail. How many miles didn't I WALK to see you?"

I had no answer to that. I remembered the long hitch hike from Durban to Ermelo and the many times he had done the Johannesburg to Durban and back trips, on his thumb. I felt very ashamed of myself because he had never mentioned the hardships he'd endured to be with me. We spent a suddenly sad and gloomy Sunday together, made subdued love for the last time on the Sunday night, said our tearful goodbyes and with broken hearts parted. I wondered ifl would ever see him again. I had an empty void in my stomach and CLIJ\IB EVERY MOUNTAIN wondered why life was so cruel. I did the last bit of shopping with a very heavy heart on

Monday morning and left for MarientaL CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 29

Prior to my trip to Johannesburg, the drab grey concrete wall at the creche had been bothering me, so I painted it white. That looked worse. I bought a few cans of different coloured paints, brushes and a few comic books and painted comic characters all over it.

That certainly brightened the whole property, even if they weren't all that professional.

The creche could be seen from the Main Road into town, and visitors, used to stop and take photographs of my wall. I think I might have started a trend for creches and nursery school walls. I never did see a wall like that in Johannesburg prior to moving to

Mariental.

hannesburg as I was nearing Keetmanshoop, I saw blue lights flashing in the road. I slowed down and found it was Traffic police checking on trucks for

Roadworthiness and Licences etc. etc. Not that there was much traffic on the road. I had driven for miles and not seen a single truck or car. They stopped me and checked the

Ranchero and told me that the fog lights were illegal and the light over the number plate was out, (must have picked up a stone on the dirt road between Olifantshoek and

Upington) so they would have to give me a fine. I said it wasn't my vehicle and I had no intention of paying any fine. They then gave me the third degree, wanting to know whose vehicle it was, where I had come from, and where I was going to. I told them that the

Ranchero belonged to Ivan Peters, who lived in Mariental. The one Policeman asked me if Ivan was a Scotsman and had he ever lived in Keetmanshoop. The answer to that was yes and he knew Ivan from earlier years and after that we were best buddies. I left them

110 to what must have been a very boring job as there was no traffic and it was late at night.

I hadn't gone very far when I saw lights coming up behind me. Inthose days the speed limit was 100 kilometres per hour. I must have been doing 160. They stopped me again, and said I was breaking the speed limit. With a very innocent look, I told them I was only doing 100. They said they were doing 180 to catch me. I said there must be something wrong with the speedometer. They said as I must be very tired, I should stop in

Keetmashoop for the night. I said I couldn't as I had a creche to run and work started at

6.00 the next morning. They gave me some coffee out of their flask. I think they just wanted company.

After passing through Keetmashoop, I really put 'voet in die hoek'. I was very tired and just wanted this journey to be over. I stopped a couple of times to run around the car to wake up. A couple of weeks later, one of the Policemen came to the creche, which wasn't hard to find, due to the wall. He said "Hello, Speedy Gonzales, you must have been going as fast as that Ranchero could go."

They had stopped and asked another Policeman that was sitting on the Mariental side of

Keetmanshoop if he had seen a red Ranchero go past. That Policeman said ''.ia about 10 minutes ago". They chased me all the way to Asab and never even saw my tail lights. I just laughed and insisted that I was only doing 100 kilometres per hour. I gave him a cup of coffee and never saw him again.

Penny and I bought a huge black and white pig from the local Catholic Priest who farmed them as a sideline. The pig was slaughtered, but not cut up. Penny and I started to "werk die vleis", as they used to say. It was hilarious; we really messed up, because neither of us had a clue how to butcher a pig carcass. We cut out what we though was the fillet,

111 because it was winter and we planned to have a fondue. When we got to cut our chops, we found they had no eye, just bone! I turned around at one stage, and there was Penny, at the sink with a pig leg and a box of Surf. I stopped her just before she applied the

Surf. She didn't like a dark mark on the skin and though she could wash it off with Surf.

She never gave it a thought that the meat might taste of soap! We were city girls and used to buying our meat from the butcher or Supermarket. We learnt a lot though, and used to buy sheep directly from the farmers, have them slaughtered, skinned and cut in half and then proceed to "werk die vleis".

Ivan had a boat and on weekends we used to go to the Hardap Dam to water ski, or at least to try. I was just getting the knack of it, when he shouted, much to the amusement of the people watching along the bank of the dam, "keep your legs together, you're not in bed now." I could have killed him; he did so love tormenting me. He would tow me into the middle of dam and then stop start the boat until the ski rope went slack and I fell off the skis. He would leave me there to swim back. It was a really long swim, but the thought of the Barbel and other fish in it, made it a very quick one.

Ona was a toddler and she could only speak Afrikaans as all her friends at the Creche were Afrikaners. There were only three families in Mariental who were English speaking, old man Munro and his wife Olive, Penny and Ivan, and myself. The couple at the Hotel could speak English, but it was rarely heard in that town and we quickly became totally fluent in Afrikaans. Even Ivan, who could barely speak Afrikaans when he first got to

Mariental, spoke it, but he did mispronounce many words, much to the amusement of the locals. We had a tremendous amount of rain one week. South West was an arid land and when there was rain, all the rivers ran strongly and there was a very strong possibility of flooding. The authorities used to monitor the rainfall and the rise of the Fish River which fed the Hardap Dam. Ifthe dam got too full the sluice gates would have to be opened and that could cause flooding in the town. I heard Ivan tell someone that they were monitoring the "hoer plekke" but the way he pronounced "hoer" it came out as "whore instead of high" in Afrikaans. This amused the locals greatly. He was also a very good dancer, so was popular at all the dances in town. Ipi Tombi was the current hit show and the ladies used to line up to dance with him to the tunes.

Ona was as cute as a button and knew just how to wrap you around her little finger. I used to visit Penny and when I was ready to go, there she was with her little suitcase, announcing to her mother, "Ek gaan saam met Auntie Hella." I could never refuse. One day she fell off her little scooter. She kicked it and said "jou blikseml" When she realized she was being observed she quickly said "ek bedoel jou stoute kabouter". It was so difficult not to laugh.

In Mariental, all we ever did for food was either a braai or a potjie. Tim was in grade 1 and came home from school one day. I asked him what he had learnt that day. Inall innocence he said "we learned about when Jesus had his last braai."

The new Social Worker moved in next door. I hoped she wasn't going to interfere. She did, but to my advantage. I had some real brats at the creche and funnily enough those are the only ones that I remember. There were the two little Fourie boys who used to swear like troopers and call me the vilest names. Then there was the screamer, he used to scream from the time his mother dropped him off, until she picked him up again. Of CLI11B EVERY MOUNTAIN

course he was always the first to be dropped and the last to be picked up. I guess the

mother got rid of him for as long as she could. One day he was at it again and the social

worker, Marietjie, came round to see ifl was murdering the child. I told her this was an

every day thing and I didn't know what to do with him. She told me to give him a

damned good hiding and put him to bed. I was quite shocked as I never expected that

from a social worker. We became very good friends.

One day Penny,popped in to tell me about the dresses she had got from Foschini on appro. Marietjie was also visiting. Penny was describing each dress and said that one had a lovely style, but it was a pity it was very 'bont'. Mariet jie _ burst out laughing and asked us if we realised we were misusing not one but two languages. We had fallen into the habit of using the most appropriate word to describe things, irrespective of the language.

Marietjie.and I corresponded for a number of years after I left Mariental. Then she married a farmer and we lost touch. CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 30

One Sunday morning, I was still in bed and the children were playing outside. I heard one them say "Hello Daddy" and thought they were playing a game. The next thing, there he was, with his suitcase in his hand, saying 'how about a cup of coffee." As if he hadn't been out of the picture for 18months. It was a paralyzing shock. I had no idea he was coming out of jail so soon, or that he would come to Mariental. It was so unexpected and so unwanted that I felt sick. I had given up the love of my life to be rid of him and now he was back and the pretence would start all over again.

Ivan organized ajob for him as a spares salesman in one of the local garages. He quickly realized that I was not very happy with the Creche; the children were driving me crazy.

No matter how hard I tried to discipline the children, they always countered with "my

Ma se"./Max told me to give it up as he was there to support us. Why I ever believed him

I don't know. I really should have known better by this time.

I gave the parents notice as well as the landlord and we moved to a house two blocks away. I had no sooner done this when he came home and told me he was leaving the garage to work at an Electrical business. I was so distressed, Ivan had helped him and now he was letting him down. I blamed myself.

Typically, he only worked at the Electrical firm for a couple of months when he came home and said "we are going to Windhoek". I realized that nothing had changed. He was as unreliable as ever and had started his job hopping once more. I dug my heels in CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN and told him I was staying right where I was. He asked me how I thought I was going to support myself without ajob. I told him I would make a plan. Off he went, convinced that

I would follow.

Ivan came to the rescue once again, and got me ajob at a Garage where I had to look after the Auto shop and driveway activities. The pay was not so good and I could no longer afford the house because the electricity was nearly double the rent. But as my Dad would have said, half a loaf is better than nothing at all.

Mariet .was a real brick and organized a subsidy for the boys to go to boarding school in Mariental and got a court order for Max to pay maintenance, which of course, he never did. I was able to go and see the boys every day after work.

Penny and I did a trip to Windhoek to buy light fittings, carpeting and tiles for the new house she and Ivan were building. We went into a shop in Kaizer Street and there was a rather large man in what we called a Bunny suit. This was a variation of the very fashionable Safari suit, but had a shorter shirt. This man was sitting on his haunches demonstrating a radiogram. His top had pulled up and his pants down, so that you could see his cleavage. I nudged Penny and whispered "Sexy!" Well, that sent us into a fit of hysterical giggling. The harder we tried to stop, the worse it became and we spent the day in laughter. We had to go into a Building Society for Penny to cash her B2 shares. They paid her out in cash and not a cheque. She felt a bit nervous carrying such a large sum of money in her bag. I said "Don't worry, I'll be your body guard, I have my gun in my bag!" That set us off again.

Itwas just one of those really upbeat days when absolutely everything seemed hilarious.

On the way home we stopped several times to pick a plant that grew wild, some kind of small squash, and different grasses that would have made a lovely dry arrangement. The arrangement never materialized, but Penny had weeds all over her property for a couple of seasons! Our last stop was at Kalkrand, where we had a beer each. We got home well after dark, but we had done all the shopping in what was a fun filled day.

I was offered an outside room to rent from one of the ladies that worked with me. It was near the Hardap Dam, but petrol was cheap, there was no electricity to pay and the rent was reasonable, so I moved.

Annemarie w orked for Foschini and we became friends. We were about the same age and single, so spent a lot of time together. We got in with a young crowd and used to party on a low level cement bridge over the Fish river, which was mostly dry. They called it the

Slab.

I met Jurie at one of the parties on the Slab.

Annemarie and I went to a lot of parties on the Slab. Everyone took their own drinks and occasionally a fire would be made and we would braai. It was a sort of open party, requiring no invitation. Word would go around 'party at the Slab' and all and sundry would rock up. Jurie was one of the regulars.

At one of the parties, Jurie invited me to bioscope; 'The Poseidon Adventure' was showing. With me living out near Hardap and him in town, we arranged to meet at the bioscope. He was late and I was annoyed. I had always had a thing about punctuality and still do. Rather 10 minutes early than 5 minutes late. When he asked if he could come and visit me the next night, I told him that if he was as much as one minute late, I would not be there. I thanked him for the movie, gave him a peck on the cheek and went home.

He took my admonishment to heart, was caught in a speed trap, but still made it in just the nick of time! I made coffee and we sat and chatted. Then he stared getting physical, and was most insistent. We went all the way, but it was an absolute disaster. He was far too worked up and I was no where near ready.

Over the following months I taught him a few of Gerald's tricks and things got better. But he was no Gerald.

Annemarie w as transferred to Foschini in Windhoek and I would occasionally go to

Windhoek for a weekend to see her. One weekend she organized a date for me with her boyfriend's pal. They came and picked us up at her flat and took us for a nice dinner.

After dinner we went back to their hotel room for a night cap. Next thing, Annemarie and the boyfriend disappeared and I was left alone with this stranger. I suppose he thought I would be an easy lay. When he tried his luck and I said no, he got nasty and told me he had paid for dinner. I told him that entitled him to nothing. I picked up my handbag and walked out. Not knowing where the hell Annemarie_ was, I walked back to her flat. It was a very long walk and I was in high heels. I had to sit in my car and wait for her as I didn't have a key to her flat. That was when I vowed never to go anywhere without my own car, unless I knew the person very well.

Jurie and I started going out on a regular basis. On weekends we would go on picnics or fishing with the children. During the week it was to the bioscope, where two different pictures were shown each week.

Max had fetched the children for a weekend and when they came back they were all exited and told me he lived in a Castle and had a girl friend called Gretchen. Then he did his first disappearing act. When Max moved to Windhoek he took some furniture with him, including the lovely little beds I had in the creche. I wanted them back. Penny and I went to Windhoek and decided to try to find Max. The castle was our only clue. There was more than one around Windhoek, but we happened on the right one straight away. We met the owner before we reached the building. He was an eccentric character, dressed in a pith helmet, white lab coat and jodhpurs and wielding a walking stick. When I identified myself as Max's wife, he said "shame"! Max had left a couple of weeks earlier abandoning his belongings. The character took us to a storeroom to view the goods. The beds were there, but it broke my heart to see that he had left a large framed photograph of the three boys behind. That really hurt.

He had promised the boys that he would fetch them for the school holidays. I had to tell them that this wasn't going to happen. When I told them Max was gone and no one knew where he was, Gary broke down and cried. He put his little arms around me and said "you won't ever leave us, will you Mommy?" Itjust about broke my heart.

Marietjie, the Social Worker got onto the case and one day, Sergeant Aggenbach came to tell me that they had traced Max and he was injail in Windhoek awaiting trial for fraud.

He had been passing rubber cheques all over the place and they had picked him up some where in the Cape.

I decided that enough was enough and went to see a lawyer, I wanted a divorce. I was going to sue Max for desertion. The lawyer asked me if Max had asked me to go with him when he left for Windhoek. When I admitted that he had, he informed me that Max hadn't deserted me, but I him. A woman was supposed to follow her man.

I was disgusted and thought the law could surely not be so cruel. I decided to go to the

Windhoek prison to see Max. He was speechless. The last person he expected to see was me. I told him in no uncertain terms that as soon as he got out of there I wanted a divorce. CHAPTER 31

I often had supper with Penny and Ivan. Ona was always happy to see "Auntie Hella"

During one school holiday, Penny and I and all the children were on our way to a farm

near Gobabis to visit friends. Of all the luck, we had a puncture. Jonty and I got the spare

wheel out and found, to my dismay, that we did not have ajack. It was a dirt road and we

had not passed a car since we got on to it. Here we were, well and truly stuck. The road

had recently been graded and there were mounds of sand all along the side of the road. I

got the idea of driving the car so that the flat wheel rested on a mound. Then the children

and I stacked rocks under the car, then scraped away the mound, changed the wheel1

drove gently off what was left of the mound and rocks, and we were on our way.

Murphy's Law! We had no sooner reached the farm when we had a second flat wheel.

Thank goodness the farmer took the wheel off and had it and the spare fixed in Gobabis. ""* he auto shop I worked for was attached to a BP Garage and always had promotions. At T'

one time it was stainless steel ware, such as steak platters, toast racks and colanders etc.

Because of the hot climate we used to start work earlier than most and have a two hour

lunch break. I spent so many late nights with Jurie that I used to catch up on my sleep at

lunch time. One day Ivan sneaked into the Auto shop whilst I was having a snooze and

loaded all the stainless steel goods into my car. He was always playing such pranks on

everyone, a real pest!

120 On one of our picnics down at the river one Sunday, I had my bikini on and fell asleep in the sun. I had the worst sunburn of my life. My legs, stomach and the top of my breasts

120 were just one big blister. Itwas pure agony to put clothes on. To crown it all, Jurie

jumped off the bakkie into a thorn bush. Itwas a 'hakdoring' which had a barb almost

like a fish hook. It went almost right through his foot. We tried to get it out without

success and eventually he had to go to the hospital to have it cut out. He had been in

agony for hours until it was removed by the doctor. >- At that time there were petrol restrictions and you could only buy petrol between 6.00

a.m. and 6.00 p.m. during the weekdays. South West being a vast and very empty

country, you could travel 280 kilometers without seeing any sign oflife. People would

never have been able to reach their destinations without carrying some petrol. At the

weekend I would have at least a dozen ten litre cans of petrol in the Auto shop. I made a

lot of friends, helping desperate motorists that way. I met a fellow, Buddy, who worked

in the BP Auto shop of a garage in Windhoek through this activity.

With Max not paying maintenance I was really battling financially. Annemarie suggested

I move to Windhoek. She was getting married and I could take over her flat. I had to get

a

job first though, which I did, at double my salary. When I told my boss I was leaving, he

said I couldn't rnn away from my troubles! I told him I couldn't fit my problems into

my salary and that I was tired ofliving like a poor white in someone else's back room I

hated it when the children came home, one had to sleep on a mattress in the kitchen,

one, in the bathroom and the third almost under my bed. He told me to draw up a

budget to prove it to him

When I did, he suddenly came up with an offer that if I stayed he would pay me the

Windhoek salary, rent a house for me and pay the electricity. This was so tempting,

121 but my father's wisdom prevailed. If!was suddenly worth all that to him, he had been

122 exploiting me all the time I had been working for him. So I refused the offer. It was all , arranged. I would work my months notice, Annemarie would be out of the flat by then, and I would start my new job.

About a week before I was about to leave, the boss called me into his office and asked me to stay on for at least another month. I told him I couldn't as I had already committed to both the job and a flat in Windhoek. He said he would pay-me the rent on the flat, the same salary, but as he had not replaced me, really needed my help. I told him I would let him know on the Monday. Buddy had told me that he was resigning at the end of the month to move to Cape Town and he thought I might like to work in Windhoek. At the time I said I couldn't do without ajob for a month, but now it would be ideal. I phoned him and asked him if they had found a replacement for him. He said he hadn't resigned yet. If I could come up to Windhoek on a Saturday for an interview, he was sure I would get the job.

I agreed and he phoned later to say it was all arranged. I went up for the interview and got the job. On the Monday I told my boss I would stay the extra month, then the hard part came when I had to tell the people who had offered the first job in Windhoek, that there had been a change of plans.

Marietjie kindly organized for the boys to go to boarding school in Okahandja. I moved to Windhoek in the November of 1974, a few days to the Christmas holidays, so everything worked out.

Jurie helped me with the move to Windhoek. He was happy about the move as it saved him numerous trips between Windhoek and Mariental. I didn't have much to move so it all fitted comfortably on his bakkie. I loaded a few boxes and suitcases in my car and that was it. We got to the flat and I got settled in very quickly. I was just a little upset about losing one of the drawers of the dressing table that Charlie had given me, and I had carted all the way from Durban.

On the Monday I started work at the Auto Shop. The petrol station was about two blocks away from the main office, garage and showrooms. I was in charge of a staff of eight on the forecourt and had to do all the cashing up and monitoring of petrol and diesel sales so as to see that the tanks were full at all times.

I still saw the BP Representatives that I had dealt with in Mariental. I knew the fellows from Germie Motors, a second hand lot also owned by the boss in Mariental and there was Annemarie and her new husband and Jurie of course. Jurie had grown up in

Mariental and most of his friends were still there, which was why he spent so much time there. He was an electrician on the Railways and was actually based in Windhoek.

Jurie always came to visit bringing a flower of some sort that he had pinched from a garden or park on the way. We spent Christmas with Annemarie and on old Years Eve we went out for dinner, but Jurie insisted we go back to my flat and see the New Year in alone together. He wanted to make love from 1974 to 1975! There was no end to him that night and he would have carried on to 1976 ifl had let him.

Three months after I moved to Windhoek, Jurie was transferred to Germiston. He had applied for the transfer before we met, so that he could be close to his parents, who lived in Vereeniging. It had only now come through. CHAPTER 32

Jurie moved to Kempton Park which is close to Germiston where he would be working.

He wrote and phoned daily. He must have spent a fortune on the phone calls and stamps as the calls were long and the letters were many.

I heard about a fortune teller who lived at the Matchless mine about 100 kilometers from

Windhoek. She was purported to be amazingly good. Annemarie and I decided to go and see her. We made an appointment and went straight after work one evening.

She was excellent. She told me I was still married, but would be getting divorced soon.

My husband would ask me to come back to him, but I shouldn't entertain the idea. She described Max as if she knew him personally. I would have problems where the number 9 and 6 were concerned, (that didn't make sense at the time). I would be moving to a place where there were a lot oflittle hills (I had no intention of moving anywhere). I had three children who would bring me a lot of joy, but also a lot of pain. She told me I would get married three times. When I said, I won't even get married for a second time, she said my second husband would die, but wouldn't elaborate on how.

After we left her, I told Annemarie that she had been right about some things but the rest was a load of hogwash.

At the end of March Jurie sent me a plane ticket to Johannesburg for the Easter weekend. I was so excited as I had never flown before. I bought air sickness pills on

Annemarie's reco=endation, but forgot to take them. I didn't need them, the plane was a Jumbo, and the flight was as smooth as sitting in a chair in your sitting room. Jurie was at the airport to meet me. We didn't go straight to his sister's place; he took me to a very pretty spot next to a little dam. The grass was a luscious and green, under willow trees and there were butterflies, hundreds, too beautiful to describe. We made love right there on the grass, under the trees, and spent some time, before going to his sister's house.

We spent a very happy go lucky weekend together. On the Monday Jurie refused to take me to the airport. I had to convince him that I had responsibilities, three children, a job and a flat to go back to. I could not abandon everything, not even for him. The children were with Annemarie and had to go back to Okahandja for school. He made me promise that if he took me to the Airport, I would go back, resign, organize school transfers for the boys and give notice at the flat. I promised, and went back to Windhoek.

I got a notice to say that my divorce hearing would be on the 25h April but I didn't have to attend. I went anyway; I just had to know for sure that this was really happening. I bumped into Max on the Courthouse steps, where he told me it wasn't too late; we could stop all this right now. I asked him ifthere was 'fool' written across my forehead, and went into court.

There were a few cases before ours. Then it was Max's turn.he Magistrate asked him if he had asked me to come back to him. He answered in the affirmative, and then he was asked what I had said. He answered in the negative and it was all over. There was nothing about the custody of the children. Just finished, over, all done! Score one for the fortune teller. I traded my little Colt in for a Peugeot at Germie Motors, and did a lot of walking after that. The Peugeot kept on breaking down. It was in the workshop more than on my driveway. Numbers on the number plate were sixes and nines. Score two for the fortune teller.

I still hadn't resigned or done anything to keep my promise to Jurie and he was really getting very uptight about it all. I eventually said 'Ok, I am coming, but you have to come and fetch me." By this time it was nearly the end of May, so I resigned on the 1st June and made all the other arrangements.

I was still having problems with the Peugeot, which after all this time, they discovered had a cracked cylinder head. I told them they had better get it fixed in a hurry, as I was leaving Windhoek at the end of the month. They promised faithfully that they would.

When Jurie arrived it still wasn't done.

Jurie arrived a few days before the end of June and we went and fetched the boys from

Okahandja. We packed and loaded the bakkie. I had my last fight with Gennie Motors told them to stick the car in rather more colourful language. We left Windhoek, all five of us in a loaded Hi Lux.

The trip was quite slow and uncomfortable, so that night we pulled into a lay bye and slept under a tree in sleeping bags. The next morning we woke up to find this huge

Caterpillar front end loader parked right next to us. We had never even heard him pull in.

Corning through Germiston on our way to Kempton Park we passed a lot of mine dumps, the little hills - score three for the Fortune teller.

At last we arrived in Kempton Park where Jurie had rented a flat, on the 2nd floor. Even after a long and tiring journey, he picked me up, threw me over his shoulder, ran up the two flights of stairs and carried me over the threshold! The children thought this was hysterically funny, and I was laughing so much, I nearly wet myself. CHAPTER 33

The first couple of weeks in Kempton Park were very busy. There were job interviews, getting the children settled in a new school etc. I applied for two jobs; one was in the

Accounts Department of a furniture store. The second was at Illings :I was accepted inunediately at the first, but it was a six day week..Illings said they would let me know.

That job paid better and was a five day working week. After a few days of not hearing anything I thought, what the heck, and phoned them. I got the job and was in my element. I started working for Illings in mid July, the children started school after the

July holidays and everything was hunky dory. I made new friends at work; there was

Miggie, who used to read our tea leaves. That was the only time I drank tea. I hate tea, but loved her readings, and she wouldn't read your cup unless you had drunk the tea.

Margaret was the supervisor and Barbara the shipping clerk. They were a good crowd to work with.

We went to see Daisy and Byron, who were now living at Eikenhof. Daisy said they often saw Gerald and I told her not to tell Gerald I was back.

Then the bad penny, Max, turned up. I could have cursed myself for leaving a forwarding address. He caused a lot of friction between Jurie and I.Jurie, to my consternation was as jealous as Max. I had not picked up on this before.

Max was living in Norkem Park, a suburb of Kempton Park and much too close for comfort. Why, out of the whole country, did he have to pick my doorstep to move to, I will never know. He would drop in to see the children (or so he said) anytime he felt like it, and that would lead to another rip roaring row with Jurie. We went to Vereeniging where I met Jurie's parents and two younger sisters. I really was a square peg in a round hole as far as that family was concerned. I was English speaking, a divorced Catholic, had three children and found out then that I was nearly ten years older than Jurie. To crown it all, his father was still fighting the Boer War!

I never felt comfortable in their company. Jurie wanted to visit them every weekend. This entailed going fishing on the Vaal River with the whole family, irrespective of the weather. I hated it, although the children enjoyed the fishing trips.

One weekend I told Jurie that I was not going to Vereeniging, and if he wanted to go, he could go on his own. I was tired of fishing, I was tired of his family and I was tired of the

Boer War. I could possibly endure that once a month only. I also would love to go and visit my Mom and Dad. We had a huge fight about it, but he finally agreed.

The next weekend we went to Airlie. Jurie loved it there. We went to the old graveyard which dated back to the late 1800 and early 1900's. There were British Soldier's graves as well as those of early settlers in that area. Jurie and the boys climbed the mountain and teased me for only making it halfWay. Mom and Dad loved their grandchildren as usual made us feel warmly welcome. So we compromised, we spent a weekend a month at

Vereeniging and the same at Airlie. Jurie was much happier at Airlie than I was at

Vereeniging, He didn't have the Boer War to fight.

On one weekend at Airlie Jurie and I found an old Figtree behind the little Trading Store that Dad owned. It was covered in Morning Glory and had a soft bed of Morning Glory underneath. Itwas a dream tree for the kids to climb while Jurie and I lazed underneath it.

We didn't realize that there was a beehive in the tree until the boys disturbed it. The bees swarmed and attacked the children. We yelled at them to jump. Rory and Tim did, but Gary was too scared. Eventually he had to and we all ran, with the bees in hot pursuit.

There was a small stream between the tree and the shop, with only a few inches of water in it. Somehow Rory managed to immerse himself in the water and escape the bees. The rest of us had multiple stings. Back home, Rory sat on the tailgate of the bakkie laughing and mocking us. He couldn't feel a thing. As he was waving his arms about, a bee stung him on the finger. Change of tune! I removed bee stings from my scalp for days afterwards.

Back home, as I didn't have transport, I used Jurie's bakkie to drop him off at the

Kempton Park Station in the mornings and pick him up after work. I worked in Isando, which was much closer to home. I picked him up one afternoon and he couldn't wait to get home, he was very excited about something but wouldn't tell me. We had hardly got through the door, when he was down on one knee and asking me to marry him. He produced an engagement ring. What could I say, my previous excuse had got lost in the divorce court in April.

Max took the children for the September holidays. I got a visit from two men from

Volkskas Bank. They came to repossess the Peugeot! I told them to go to Gennie

Motors, in Windhoek, who still had the car. They told me I still had to pay for the car and made all sorts of threats. I got so angry. I had lost my Colt and now they wanted me to pay for a car that had, in fact, never left the garage I bought it from. I was adamant that I would not pay one blue bean. They said they would be back with a warrant for my arrest! I had heard it all before. Max was a good teacher. I had been there, done that, and even had the T-shirt. I made an appointment with a lawyer. In the meantime I received a slip for a registered letter, to be collected from the Post Office. On the way to the lawyer, I picked up the registered letter, which was from Max's lawyer, saying he wasn't bringing the children back, because I was a bad mother and I was living with a man! What a cheek. He had been living with Gretchen long before we even got divorced.

At the lawyer's I told him I now had two things to discuss with him. There was the car and another matter, far more serious. I started telling him about Max. About all the places we'd been, twenty eight in ten years, his myriad number of jobs, and the fact that he had been in jail. I don't think I was very coherent, as he told me to stop and first tell him about the car. He then advised me to go home and make a list of all the places we lived and all the jobs Max had been in, plus the jail bit, and anything else I could think of. I was to come back the next day with the list and my divorce papers.

When I told Jurie about all this, he wanted to find Max and kill him. I went back to the lawyer the next day. He had already sorted out the car problem, and I didn't have to pay a cent Then he switched on a tape recorder and started asking questions. After the interview I told him about Gretche°' and all the broken promises Max had made to the children. The lawyer said he usually managed to get two cases on one tape and here he'd already used two tapes, which was just enough. He said I could be a whore, but that wouldn't make me a bad mother. He phoned Max's lawyer and I had the children back in two days.

He then proceeded to sue Max for maintenance. This was a total waste of time because I never got any. I think the lawyer was intrigued by my case, because he hardly charged me anything.

130 CHAPTER 34

I went to see Daisy and Byron one weekend. Daisy apologized profusely because Byron

had let the cat out of the bag. Gerald had been to see them and Byron had said 'guess

who's back'. Gerald asked Daisy for my number and she said she didn't have it, so he

gave her his number and told her to give it to me when she saw me next.

The number burnt a hole in my purse. I wondered ifl really wanted to complicate my life

more than it was. One Friday afternoon I couldn't stand it anymore, so I phoned. The

Security answered the phone and said everyone had already knocked off. I didn't know

whether I was relieved or disappointed.

We had been having battery problems with the bakk.ie. I dropped Jurie off at the station as

usual, and went back home. When I wanted to leave for work, the bakk.ie wouldn't start. I

had to run around looking for someone to give it a push. It was going to be one of those

days. u By the time I got to work, I was late and I was tearful. I phoned Gerald. He was so

pleased to hear from me at last. He wanted to know where I was living. I didn't tell him,

but in the course of the conversation I let slip where I was working. It was so nice to talk

to someone so unjudgemental and understanding. I felt much better after that call.

Not an hour later the receptionist phoned to say there was somebody downstairs to see

me. I thought it was one of my suppliers. I went downstairs and who should it be but

Gerald. I was surprised; he was the last person I expected. He told me to make some

13 1 excuse and meet him in the parking lot. I went back upstairs and told Margaret I had to go

13 2 CLI1\1B EVERY MOUNTAIN and see my lawyer. She knew I was having problems and was very understanding.

Gerald followed me from the parking lot to Ron's Hideaway, a Roadhouse close by in

Harmelia. We sat and talked and talked and talked. I told him all about my troubles with

Max, the car, Jurie and his family, got it all off my chest. When I looked again it was

5.30, the time I had to pick Jurie up at the station. I left Gerald at the Roadhouse and raced to the Kempton Park Station, but when I got there, the train had been and gone and there was no Jurie.

I thought 'Oh Shit, now I am in trouble, I have really done it!' He was at the flat when I got home, but I flounced in, pretending to be very angry and complaining loudly and bitterly about being so tired of getting people to push the problematic bakkie! Then when I got to the station, he wasn't even there. He was so apologetic, that I felt very guilty about my charade. The next morning the bakkie wouldn't start again and he had to push it, so no suspicions were raised.

One day I went to the shops and there in the rain was little ginger kitten in the gutter. He looked half drowned. I picked him up and took him home. He was a winner, captured all our hearts and accompanied us to both Vereeniging and Airlie. On the way back from

Vereeniging we saw vendors selling baby rabbits along the side of the road. They had been dyed in various colours with food colouring. I chose a green one. He was so tame and so darned cute, I loved him to bits. I came home one day and my bunny was gone. I searched the whole flat, even the cupboards, but my bunny was gone. I cried my eyes out. Jurie laughed and said "I wonder if you will cry like this if something happed to me". I was so cross with him, I told him I would never cry about him, and I never did. CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

Jurie and I went window shopping one night and we saw a lounge suit we really liked. It was a bit expensive, but I really fancied it. I needed RI 00 deposit to secure it. That weekend we went to Airlie. I had a brand new gas stove that I brought with from

Windhoek, which I had never used, as all kitchens in the Transvaal came fitted with stoves. Mom was cooking on the coal stove, so I talked Dad into buying my gas stove for her for RI 00. The frrst thing I did on Monday morning was buy the Lounge suite. I was so chuffed with my purchase.

Jurie's sister came to visit with her children and in two two's they were all over my new lounge suite with their dirty shoes. I nearly had a fit. I told them to get their feet off of my furniture and to sit on the floor if the didn't know how to sit on a chair. She was not impressed and told me she had seen a suitejust like it in a second hand shop for R200. I just thought, 'jealousy makes you nasty'. I had never seen a lounge suite like it before or smce.

Gerald phoned me regularly. He phoned one day and told me that he had told his wife,

Cynthia that Dajsy had told him that I was back in town, divorced from Max, and living with a boyfriend in Kempton Park. Cynthia told him to phone me and invite us to supper.

We went and had a lovely evening. We reciprocated by inviting them for supper and a home movie the following Friday night.

The evening had started pleasantly enough. We hired a projector, took a picture off the wall and arranged a two-seater couch and two chairs opposite. Cynthia and I sat on the couch while Gerald and Jurie occupied the chairs.

When it was time for them to leave, Gerald said he wasn't sure of the way back to the

Johannesburg Highway. Jurie said that wouldn't be a problem, we would show them the route. All fine so far, but as soon as we were in our bakkie, he started. "Why didn't you sit next to me during the movie?" he asked. I didn't really know what to say, so reminded him that he had arranged the chairs, and in any case, his chair was right beside

=e.

We got to the on ramp of the highway and Gerald and Cynthia waved goodbye. We turned around to go home. "Why don't you put your hand on my leg, like you used to?" he asked. I told him to stop being childishfi was smokinJ e slarmned on the brakes, ' pulled to the kerb, and told me he felt like driving into the nearest lamp post.

I told him to take me home and then he could go and drive into as many lamp posts as he pleased. We finally got home at about midnight. CHAPTER 35

Jurie unlocked the flat and I went straight to the bathroom to brush my teeth. He came into the bathroom and said quite casually "look what I have done". He ripped up his T shirt and as the fibres came out of the wound the blood gushed out like water out of a hosepipe. I then realized he had stabbed himself in the chest. It was horrible. He turned around and collapsed in the passage between the bathroom, bedroom and entrance hall.

I had to do something. I had to get help. I was so agitated. Frantically, I looked for the keys. I slipped and slid in the blood that was still pumping out of his body, but I could not find the keys. 'Oh please God, let me find them', I prayed. Indesperation I broke the burglar bars off the kitchen window. I will never know where I got the strength from. I woke Tim up and put him through the window and told him to bang on the neighbour's door and tell them to break our door down. He couldn't wake them up.

By this time I was covered in blood to my knees, still praying "Please God let me find the keys'. Then I found them on the coffee table behind the chairs and couch. Jurie must have tossed them over the couch. I don't know how I got there, but the next thing I was in the Police Station screaming 'call an ambulance and come quickly'. Seeing the state I was in and all the blood over my legs, the police got to the flat before I did. When they got there Jurie was still breathing, but by the time the ambulance arrived he was gone.

Tim must have woken his brothers after I left the flat and there were my three little boys, wide eyed, staring at the body. My poor, poor children, they didn't deserve this. The Police asked me who they could call but I was in such a state of shock I could not think of a single person that I knew. Gary, my eldest, at ten years old, suggested Miggie and when the police asked me where she lived, I didn't know. My mind was a total blank.

Gary went with the policemen to show them and Miggie and her husband came back with 0 him to fetch the other two boys.

The police would not let me go too. They came and fetched Jurie's body and put him in a big basket to take him to the morgue. It was too ghastly to see. I was beside myself when the Policeman started asking me why I did it. I could not believe they actually suspected me. I just kept on telling them I did not do it. He was most persistent and wouldn't let it go, just asking over and over again "Why did you do it"?

Eventually, around 4.30 a.m. they left me alone in the flat and said they would send a car to fetch me later to make a statement at the station. Ijust sat there for ages, almost in a stupor but then the sight and the smell of all that blood got to me and I started cleaning up. I scrubbed and scrubbed at the brown stain on the floor.

My arms ached, my back ached and I had lost count of the buckets of bloody water

I had disposed of. This was very traumatic for me, each time I emptied a bucket, I felt as ifI was flushing a life down the drain.

This was where he had bled out after he pulled the knife out of his chest. How silly,

I thought angrily, him stabbing himself in a fit ofjealousy. This was like Max all over, only worse. I was surprised at my thoughts, there was no sadness, no regret, just anger and indignation. How dare he put my children and I through this? There were no tears, just a terrible dread of what I still had to face. At 9.30 a.m. the police arrived to take me to Police Station. I was absolutely terrified. I was afraid of being detained and worried about the children.

At the Police Station a more senior police officer took one look at me and told my tormentor of the previous night to take me home. He told me to come back after the funeral and give my statement.

I went to a phone booth at the Post Office and phoned Mom and Dad. Dad said they would be on the train that night. I also phoned Gerald who was with me within the hour.

He couldn't believe what had happened after they left, because the evening had been so pleasant. We went to fetch the boys at Miggie, but she suggested they stay with her until the next morning when Mom and Dad arrived. I spent the night with Gerald and Cynthia.

On Sunday morning Gerald took me to Germiston Station to meet Mom and Dad. They were not on the train. Gerald took me back to the flat and went back to Johannesburg. I was all alone. I felt utterly abandoned and deserted. I fetched the children from-M=igg- i-e,- they were distressed. I didn't know what to say to them and we travelled home in silence. When we got back to the flat, Mom and Dad were there. They had disembarked from the train at Kempton Park before it got to Germiston. I don't know how they found their way to the flat. Everything was a bit of blur for the next few days.

I told Dad all about that dreadful Friday and Saturday. I told Dad that the Police suspected me of murdering Jurie. Dad went with me to the Police station on Monday and spoke to the Captain who had sent me home. They had done a postmortem on the body and found from the angle of the wound, that him being 6'2 and me 5' 1 there was no way I could have stabbed him. I cried with relief, but I never cried for Jurie. I was so angry with him as he had put so many people through so much. Nor did I go to his funeral. The police had located his parents and family fishing at the Vaal River, and informed them. I don't know when or how I saw Jurie's mother and brother-in-law, she was devastated and he told me I had better not go the funeral because Jurie' s father had threatened to shoot me. What a miserable mess he'd left behind, so much pain and suffering for so many people.

Mom and Dad were a great comfort to me at his time. Mom was very quiet, unusual for her, but I think she was also in shock. Dad was a pillar of strength as always.

Jurie's sister had been at the Police Station before I went to give my statement. She created a scene and wanted to know when they were going to arrest me, the policeman who told me this said they told her to leave the Police Station before they arrested her.

There was an inquest and the result was death by suicide .The local Newspaper had an article on the front page; the Policeman who had obviously given them the story said he had never seen so much blood. All the ensuing procedures after Jurie's death seemed to be taken very quickly. I guess I was in shock and only remember the highlights. Jurie's family came and collected all his belongings as well as the bakkie. I was stuck with no transport and had to organize a lift to work and back.

Mom and Dad went back to Airlie and took the boys with them. I was alone again and a friend from work suggested I stay with her until I moved out of the flat. CHAPTER 36

The Company I worked for were the manufacturers of Mazda and leased cars to their employees at a cut rate price. I leased a Mazda Capella 1600 Coupe, and planned to go to

Mom and Dad for Christmas to fetch the boys. After Christmas we would move into a flat in Croydon.

On one of my trips to the flat to feed the cat, the neighbour was standing on the balcony.

She approached me and said she had to go and see her herbalist and didn't know how she was going to get there as her car had broken down. In one of my weaker moments I said I would take her.

The place was in Actonville, an Indian suburb of Brakpan. The street was dark and dingy and the house no better. It was a bit creepy. An Indian man let us in, and then proceeded to ask my neighbour her name, which he translated into some Indian language. Then he took a brass ashtray and placed a piece of camphor in it and set it alight. He waited for the camphor to burn, looked at the picture it had made and told her she had some kind of infection. He gave her a packet full of different leaves, and what looked like bark, the kind of things ·you would rake up in your garden, and told her to make tea with it and drink it twice a day.

I thought 'what the heck, let me try this too'. I gave him my name and he went through the same procedure. This time he studied the picture in the ashtray for what seem to me an inordinately long time. Then he took another ashtray and did the whole routine all over again. By this time, my mind was working overtime - did I have cancer or some other incurable disease? What more trouble was I going to get into? Then he showed me the ashtrays. The pictures were the same. It was absolutely uncanny. It could have been a negative of a photograph of Jurie, the beard, the hair, the face. I was dumbfounded. Then he told me that this person had died of unnatural causes and would haunt me. I freaked out!

He gave me incense sticks, camphor and some white powder. He told me I had to throw the powder in all the comers of the rooms in the flat as well as under all the cushions and pillows. Then I had to light the incense stick and twirl it around seven times, then I had to bum the camphor at all the doors. That should get rid of him. I told him I was going away for Christmas, he told me I should take all the stuff with me and repeat the routine where ever I stayed. He said there shouldn't be a break in the seven day cycle.

On our way home, my neighbour told me she knew exactly what we had to do. We followed the Indian's instructions to the letter and just had the camphor to bum. I took out a very thick green glass ashtray in the shape of a boat. I placed the camphor in the ashtray, saw my neighbour out, stood in the dark (the globe in the entrance hall had fused) and lit the camphor. I placed the ashtray on the floor in front of the door and watched it bum. All of a sudden there was an almighty explosion and the ashtray shattered into a million pieces. I could just imagine Jurie losing his temper and smashing the ashtray. I got such a fright that I yelled "Okay, okay, you can stay"! Then I ran and jumped into bed and pulled the blankets over my head. I didn't move for the rest of the night. That was the first time I spent the night alone in the flat, after Juries death.

140 I stayed in the flat with the cat until I moved to Croydon. One afternoon after work, my ex, Max, pitched up. This was all I needed. I hadn't seen him for months. I told him the

140 children were with Mom and Dad and would be there until after Christmas. He wanted to know what I was going to do for Christmas. I told him I was going to the children, of course. He smirked and asked how I was getting there, "Going by train"? He enquired.

"No, by car", I replied. He asked whose car and when I replied 'mine', he laughed and wanted to know what kind of scrap I had acquired now. The children had obviously told him about the Peugeot. The bastard was infuriating me more and more, so I said "come and I will show you". We went down the stairs and there was my beautiful, blue, brand new Mazda. I don't think he believed me until I unlocked the door, you could smell the new smell of the upholstery and the sun visors were still covered in plastic. I thought his eyes were going to pop out of his head. When he got over his surprise he said with arch sarcasm "umph, fancy furniture, fancy car, you sure are rich." I answered in exactly the same tone, "fancy that, I discovered I couldn't afford a husband" and left him standing there. For one little moment I felt great.

141 .CHAPTER 37

The childr en and I mo 'ed to a one bedr oom flat in C1oyden. The boys used to catch a bus to school in Kempton Park. Rory was naughty and managed to miss the bus at least twice a week. I would have to take him to school, so ending up paying for bus fare as well as the extra petrol used. This carried on until I threatened him that I would make him walk to school. / Gerald came around now and again to see how things were going and he phoned daily.

He was very sensitive to my state of mind and didn't make any demands.

There were six blocks of flats next to one another. Our block faced a large expanse of open veld and you could see the Service Station and Spar on the other side. The children ' used to take a short cut through the veld to the Spar. We had some unsavoury people living in the flats. Every day when I got home from work one of the boys would be in tears saying Jakkie had hit them. I told them to hit him back, but they said they couldn't because Jakkie took boxing and karate lessons and they couldn't get ne.arenough to get a: blow in.·

I got home from work one day to find Rory with a black eye and no skin on the side of his face. He told me Jakkie had hit him with a brick. I asked where Jakkie lived and went over to see his parents. That didn't work out so well, the mother came to the door and when I tried to tell her what had happened she swore at me and said I thought my children were angels and slammed the door in my face. I was furious, but there wasn't much I could do about it. A few days later I was standing on the balcony watching the children playing in the street next to the veld. I saw Jakkie corning through the long grass, he bent down to pick up a stone. Before I could shout a warning, Rory grabbed him and the other two got stuck into him good and solid. I thought 'good for you," but when I saw blood flowing, I yelled at them to come upstairs at once.

A few minutes later there was a knock on the door and there was a bloodied Jakkie and his mother. She said it wasn't fair that three had tackled one. I said I didn't think it was a fair fight either when one used bricks and stones, then slammed the door in her face.

Kevin .was the workshop foreman at Ulin@_,told me jokingly one day that it was time I gave my car a wash. I told him that this would not be easy living in a block of flats. The next Saturday afternoon he arrived, equipped with bucket, cloths and car polish and gave my car the whole valet. This became a Saturday routine.

Illings underwent a major restructuring of the company. Head Office occupied the second floor, CIM, the heavy duty trucks were on the first floor and my Department,

Mazda was on the ground floor. I got promoted to Creditors Supervisor with one clerk to supervise.

There were three people in Debtors and two in Shipping. The Accountant and Financial

Manager each had their own office, but the rest of us were in a big open plan office. We all got on extremely well together, and poor Adrian had a hard time being the only male in the office, but I think he loved it. Barbara had left and Bev joined the company in her place. Bev and my desks were next to each other and we shared a phone. We had a lot of fun in that office and there was always lots of laughter. You had to watch your p's and q's as to what you said, as there was always someone who would twist it into something smutty. Poor Adrian had a permanent blush. Gerald phoned one day and mentioned that he had jumped a robot, and had got a hefty fine. I asked him "But why on earth did you jump the robot?" and ina dry voice I heard Bev say "Now that really is the height of frustration." Bev and I sounded the same on the phone, so I always made sure I answered it, incase it was Gerald and he said something he shouldn't, to her. One day the phone rang and I wasn't at my desk. I ran and made a grab for it. I made to sit on my chair but missed and landed up under the desk.said, very dryly, "if it's that private, I'll leave!" Of course the whole office roared with laughter. CHAPTER 38

My lawyer hauled Max into court for non payment of maintenance and got a court order against him, which Max totally ignored. I had already given up on that joke, but this was between Max and the Courts now and I was merely a witness. The Public Prosecutor was really getting very frustrated with both Max and the Magistrate, who I think was a woman hater. He made me feel as if I was the guilty party and kept letting Max off with suspended sentences, which he never brought into force. I felt as if I spent half my life in that court room to no avail. Max never ever paid towards his children's well being.

I never stopped the children from seeing Max, although a lot of people said I should. If the children wanted to see their father, I wasn't going to stop them. I never bad mouthed him to them either.

The children went to Max for the Easter school holidays after he pronrised he would not try any new tricks. Mom, Dad and I took a trip to visit Penny and Ivan in Mariental.

They arranged for us to meet them at Ai-Ais for a weekend together. Ai-Ais was named by the San tribe and means very hot. And so it was. I believe the temperatures seldom got below 35 degrees even at night. We swam in the cold swimnring pool; enjoyed the warm sulphur pools; braaied and made potjiekos. Dad always had an affinity for creatures and amazed us when he stood with his arms outstretched and dozens of birds would come and sit on them. We also visited the Fish River Canyon, second only in size to the Grand Canyon in

America. It is massive, 161 kilometers long, 27 kilometers wide and 549 meters deep and absolutely awe inspiringly magnificent.

We then went on to Mariental for a couple of weeks. I met up with a lot of my old friends and I had a royal time. They were still partying on the slab, and I went to a few of those.

After a hectic two weeks, all good things come to an end, and it was time to go home. We were due to leave at 6.00 am and Mom was very agitated because I'd only got home at

2.00 a.m. and she thought I hadn't had enough sleep and Dad didn't drive. But we got back to Croydon all in one piece. Max brought the children back without a problem and

Mom and Dad took the train back to Airlie.

I had just got home from work one afternoon when there was a knock on the door.

Standing on the threshold was a tall fellow with quite a nice body and a towel wrapped around his waist. His hair was wet and his green eyes were spitting fire, and he clutched one of my sons in each hand! In a not very friendly tone of voice, he demanded "Are these yours?" The whole scene was so funny I nearly packed up laughing, but managed to keep a straight face and acknowledge ownership of the two wriggling little tykes. He told me he had been in the bath when there was a knock at the door, when he got to the door there was no one there, It happened three times he said, emphasizing the three times, before he caught them. He was so cross. I was thinking of Jean and my 'toktokkie' escapades and asked him if he had ever been a kid. He let their hands go, adjusted his towel and stomped off, clearly in a huff.

The boys asked me if I was cross with them and I couldn't stop laughing. How could I be? I was too amused replaying this comic scene. Kevin did bis Saturday thing and washed and polished my car. He finally plucked up the courage to invite me to the movies. Shame, this had been building up for weeks. I liked him as a friend, but he wasn't my type, far too timid. Gary had gone out to buy some sweets with bis pocket money. Next thing he came in and he was crying. I asked in exasperation "What now?" "Mommy, Jakk:ie's brother bit me!" he replied. I asked him why he didn't bit him back. When Gary told me he was 16 years old, I lost my temper and dashed downstairs, shoeless. I was even angrier when I caught him, because the gravel had hurt my feet. Kevin followed me, but just stood and watched.

I told Jakk:ie's brother I was sick and tired of bis whole damned family and why didn't he pick on someone his own size. He said he didn't bit older people. He obviously misunderstood what I meant. Anyway in my fury I gave him a couple of good hard slaps and told him, the next time one of my children came home crying I would lay into whoever with my sjambok. Not that I had one.

I hobbled back over the gravel, with Kevin following. We were no sooner back in the flat when there was a knock on the door. There stood another, even bigger brother. I wondered how many of these sods there were. He started shouting "how dare you bit my brother". I shouted right back "How dare your brother bully my children on a daily basis and how dare you wag your finger in my face!" I grabbed bis finger and bent it so that he was lucky it didn't break. I also informed him that the next time anything like this happened I would call the police and lay an assault charge against them. He went home and thought about it and came back later and apologized. The bullying stopped right there. Suffice it to say, Kevin and I never did make it to the movies. We sat and chatted, but he was quite boring. The only thing he could really talk about was cars. I can't say I was very interested.

With the company splitting into three departments, we had a major job sorting out the accounts as to what expenses belonged to who, so we worked a lot of overtime.

The funfair was in Kempton Park on a Saturday that I had to work. I gave the children each a bus ticket and I gave Gary some money for them to share for rides. I told them

I would come and pick them up after work.

They went off to Kempton Park and I went to work. When I got home at about 4.00 o'clock Rory and Tim were at home. They told me the funfair only opened at 6.00 p.m. so they came back. I asked them where Gary was and they thought he might be at one of his friends. I sent them to go and look for him.

I was standing on the balcony watching out for the boys' return, when the towel guy came out onto his balcony too. I said hello and asked him if he had perhaps seen Gary.

He said he had not, and we got chatting. He introduced himself as Chris, and said that after he had got over his humiliation of being seen so skimpily dressed in a towel, he saw the funny side of the kid's game. And yes, he had been a kid once too.

Rory and Tim came back and said they couldn't find Gary. I told Chris I had better go to

Kempton Park to try and find him otherwise I would have to report him missing. Chris said to give him five minutes to change and he would come with us. We got to the funfair and spotted Gary immediately. He said he had waited for the fun fair to open. Chris gave the children some money for the rides and we left them there and went for a drink at the Kempton Park Hotel. A little later we picked the children up and went back to the flat where I invited him in for coffee.

Around that time I was going out with a fellow from Pretoria called .Okkie. I had met him through my work colleague, Barbara . Okkie was a fun person to be with. He took me to - · the first live show I had seen, Ipi'tombi. I really enjoyed that. We went out for dinner and he seldom arrived without a gift of some sort. He was a buyer at a major firm and the gifts were probably ones he got from his suppliers. Mostly they were bottles of Dimple

Haig or Johnny Walker Black Label whiskey.

One night he took me out to dinner and when we got back to the flat, he asked me ifI didn't miss music. He had observed that I didn't have a radio or TV. I said of course I missed music, but I had got used to being without it. He told me if I got a few records he would get me something to play them on. I said I did have a few records that I had collected in the Jurie era. He disappeared down to his car and came back with a record player which he connected and in two two's we had music. He was the first man to really spoil me. CHAPTER 39

Gerald came to visit, but fortunately always phoned first. Itbecame a bit of a problem with both him and Okkie.visiting. By this time we were no longer working overtime, but that became my stock excuse when I had to put one or the other off on a particular night when they both wanted to visit.

Chris would pop in quite often for a coffee after work, he knew I had a boyfriend so the relationship between us was just good friends. He also got on extremely well with my children and often took them to the public swimming pool.

Chris shared the flat with another couple. The flat was rented in their name and Chris used to give his share of the rent to the woman to pay over to the caretaker who came to collect the rents.

One afternoon Chris came to my flat, he was still in his working clothes, which was very unusual. He was very agitated and said he couldn't get into his flat, the key wouldn't tum.

I told him to go to the caretaker, who was sure to have a spare key.

Chris came back and told me he was really in a predicament. The other couple had not paid the rent for three months and the locks had been changed. Because the lease was not in Chris's name, the caretaker was prepared to let him remove his belongings from the flat, but at such short notice, he had nowhere to go. He asked if he could crash on my couch until he could make other arrangements.

150 I felt sorry for the poor fellow and said he could, never realizing how this was going to further complicate my life. Okkie _was not enchanted and told me to phone him when I had got rid of my lodger, and left.

I had not seen Gerald yet, to tell him, when Chris suggested that I get one of the three bedroom flats in the block next door. He would pay half the rent and share expenses. In the long run it would work out cheaper for me. I went to see the caretaker and there was a vacant flat that I could have. He said I could move in immediately as it was already the middle of the month. That weekend Chris got some of his buddies to help us to move. It was a case of getting the furniture down the stairs of the one block, over the courtyard and up the stairs of the next block. There were no lifts and both flats were on the third floor.

They battled to get the heavy lounge suite down the stairs which were quite narrow. The architect that designed those flats certainly hadn't taken furniture into consideration. The guys devised a plan to get it up to the third floor to the new flat. They tied ropes to the furniture and hauled it up and over the balcony. I had threatened them with death if they damaged my furniture. My heart was in my throat, I could just imagine my lovely lounge suite in splinters on the tar in the courtyard. At last all the furniture except for the little bamboo bar was in the new flat and what a relief, nothing was broken.

Inthe bar which was under the carport was a case of beer, which Chris had bought. After all the hard labour, Chris felt his mates deserved a beer. One of the fellows was still upstairs and when he looked over the balcony and saw the others cracking a Castle, he decided to come down by rope instead of taking the stairs. What a disaster. By the time

151 he had slid down the rope as far as the first floor his hands were burning so, that he let go

152 and landed heavily on the tar. We had to take him to hospital and he suffered two broken ankles and very severe rope burns to his hands. He was out of action for some time and couldn't even hold a Castle!

Our new arrangement worked out very well for me. I was able to go out for drinks with the girls on Friday nights and not worry about the children because Chris was there. He used to try and cook them a supper, but they thought he was the worst cook ever and taught him how to make chips. He said they made the best chips and they took over the rest of Friday night's cooking too. He in turn would do the dishes and I always came home to a clean flat.

Chris and I drifted into a comfortable relationship that I think was more to my advantage than his. I had more freedom and the children had a friend who helped them with their

Mathematics homework that I was no good at. He played ball with them inthe street and they thought he was the greatest.

Then we bought our frrst Black and White Television set. I'd be preparing supper and the four of them would sit in front of the TV watching the test pattern and waiting for 6.00 o'clock and the start of the shows.

Gerald came around unexpectedly one Friday night. I wasn't home as I had gone for drinks with the crowd from work. He hung around until I got home, but was very angry, he said he was not impressed as he had been waiting for hours. Well, he hadn't let me know that he was coming, so I asked him if he expected me to just sit around waiting for him.When he said "yes" he really got my back up and we ended up having a heated argument. He told me to enjoy my life and my child minder and left. It was the first time

I had ever seen Gerald show any jealousy, this after knowing him for nearly six years. CLIJ\1B EVERY MOUNTAIN

Chris was very sympathetic about our breakup, but I think he'd been waiting for it for quite a while. I suppose I was caught on what they call the rebound. He poured me a whiskey and let me cry on his shoulder. He put his arms around me and comforted me, then he ran his fingers through my hair and down the back of my neck. He kissed me lightly on the ear and I started getting quite worked up. Next thing I knew, my top was off and my bra undone and he was gently kissing me all over. He licked at my nipples and then suddenly stopped, I thought 'oh no, you can't just leave me like this', but he took my hand and led, a very willing me to his bedroom.

There he got rid of my slacks and panties, carried on kissing me from the breasts down my body, between my thighs, and when his tongue found the spot I had an instant orgasm. What ecstasy, when he had worked me back up into a frenzy he finally slid into me and we climaxed together in one beautiful explosion. This was a whole new and amazing experience for me. It didn't end there. He told me he loved me and had for sometime. He said it nearly killed him every time Gerald came round and he had to make himself scarce. I was very fond of Chris, but love? I wondered if I really knew what love was. Was I just protecting myself from the hurt I felt when Roy went out of my life? I suppose I never would forget my first love, or was it just the idea of being in love.

I had certainly never found it. There was Max, the Gemini, whom I had thought I loved, but actually pitied and eventually hated. There was Gerald, the Aquarian, a very strong physical attraction, maybe even lust, but love? There was Jurie, the Capricorn, whom I didn't even cry over when he committed suicide and put me through a nightmare I didn't even want to think about. Then Okkie, the Libran, who spoilt me, which I appreciated, CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN but tbat wasn't love either as I never felt heartbroken when he left. Was Chris, the

Sagittarian going to be any different? CHAPTER 40

Chris and I remained in our separate bedrooms, made love after the children had gone to bed and carried on as before.

Chris's parents lived in Marble Hall. One weekend he went to visit them and I went to

Mom and Dad at Airlie. The children were spending the weekend with Max. Chris phoned me at Airlie and told me that his car had broken down and could I pick him up on my way home. His Aunt would £ive him a lift to some turn off on the way. I had to do quite a detour to get there, mostly on dirt roads. There had been some rain and the roads were windy, with steep walls on one side and deep drops on the other, and it was slippery because of the rain. I had talked Mom and Dad into coming to spend a few days with me.

Mom sat in front with me and Dad in the back seat with a book. It was so funny. Dad pretended to be reading his book, but was watching the road like a hawk. Every time the car got into a bit of a skid in the mud, we would just hear a little "ooh", from the back seat. After that trip Dad swore he would drive to the ends of the earth with me.

Itwas the first time that Mom and Dad met Chris. When we got home I put Mom and

Dad in my room, moved one of the boys in with Chris and I shared with the other two. It cramped our style a bit, but we had a most enjoyable time. I was delighted that the parents got on well with Chris, particularly Dad. After a few days, they went back to

Airlie by train. After Mom and Dad left, Chris and I moved into one room and the children fought about the other. On weekends we would picnic at the Jukskei River or at Hartebeespoort Dam. The children loved it; Chris would climb trees with them, swim in the river and treat them like their father never did. When they spent a weekend with Max and I asked them what they had done, the reply would be 'nothing'. Not so with Chris, he really gave them quality time, love, and lots of shared activities. Ifthey wanted something and I had said 'no', they would go to him and he would come and plead their case. It wasn't very fair to me when I had to deal with four to one. It was hard to believe this was the same angry man with a towel wrapped around his waist.

Chris got to know my friends, and I, his. We had a good social life. Avon.and her husband, Lou had a house on the Vaal river at Denysville and would invite us for the weekend. Lou did barefoot skiing which awed us, who couldn't even get it right with skis.

One afternoon Chris was obviously feeling horny, and with a crowd there, we sought some privacy in a locked bathroom and made love on the grass mat on the floor. He got the worst carpet bums! Both his elbows and his knees were skinned. There was no putting one over that crowd, so Chris was teased unmercifully.

One weekend we went to Denysville and found the Vaal River in flood. The low river bridge was under water and we couldn't cross by car. Two friends, _Antoinette and Attie were already at the bridge when we got there, we decided we weren't going all the way home again, but would walk across the bridge.

We parked our cars a safe distance away from the river and the bridge. We each took a child and made our way onto the bridge. The water, for me, who was the shortest, was waist high. Fortunately chains were spanned from pillar to pillar all the way across. When we got to the other side there was a police vehicle and two policemen there, who told us our fortunes. What we didn't know was that they were about to open the sluice gates and we had just made it over in time. Our little escapade could have turned into such a tragedy. We were all drenched and still had to make it to Lou and Avon: . The police loaded all of us into the van and gave us a lift there. The next morning Lou took us to the bridge, the river had gone down and we were able to walk across to the cars.

I hadn't met any of Chris's family at this stage, and then he came home and told me his mother had phoned and told him his father was in hospital in Pretoria. He had been operated on for a hernia. Chris and a friend were supposed to go to Marble Hall one weekend to fix and fetch his car, but hadn't got round to it yet.

As his car was still at Marble Hall, I took him to see his father. I felt apprehensive about meeting his parents, remembering the reception I had got from Jurie's father. I hoped I wouldn't have to fight the Boer War all over again, Chris being Afrikaans, never having married and was now dating a divorcee with three children.

The old man was very polite and didn't have much to say. The op had gone well and he was being discharged on the Saturday. Chris's mother was staying with family in Pretoria whilst his father was in hospital, but they couldn't make it to the hospital that night, so I didn't get to meet her.

On Friday his Mom phoned himto say that the Uncle who was supposed to take them back to Marble Hall couldn't take them that weekend so they would have to stay in

Pretoria for another week. She was obviously not very happy about it so Chris asked me if I would mind taking them. I arranged for the children to stay with Antoinette and we went to collect his folks and took them to Marble Hall. CLTh1B EVERY MOUNTAIN

Itwas a very quiet journey as nobody had very much to say.

When we got to Marble Hall the old man went to lie down for a while. I could have murdered Chris because he went out to the carport and started tinkering on his car, leaving me alone with the old lady. I felt it would be rude ifl followed him, so asked her if there was anything I could help her with. She was busy preparing lunch and handed me a bowl of potatoes and a knife. Thank goodness for Dad who taught me to peel potatoes without cutting away half of the potato.

She started chatting and asking questions. I didn't know what Chris had told her about me so I thought it best to just answer as best I could. I told her I was divorced and had three boys. I then told her the Toktokkie and towel story and she thought it was hilarious.

It really broke the ice and we remained friends forever after. She couldn't wait for the old man to wake up so that I could tell him the story too.

Chris came in to find out what all the laughter emanating from the kitchen was about.

He got all embarrassed and fled back to the carport. When the old man woke up, lunch was ready, but the old lady made me frrst tell the story all over again, much to Chris's embarrassment. It would become a standing joke throughout his family.

We spent the night there, a bed was made up for me in the spare room and Chris had to sleep on the couch.

The next morning the old man was feeling a lot better. He got two riempie stools and invited me to join him sitting under a tree. We chatted for hours, he was so easy to get along with and by the time we left that afternoon I felt they had completely accepted me and even liked me. At the last moment before we left, his Mom came out and gave me a CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN packet of home made biscuits and said 'dit is koekies vir die kindertjies'. I was really touched and wanted to cry. She had not even met my children yet.

Chris couldn't speak English very well so the children and I devised a plan to teach him.

We would have an English and Afrikaans week inthe flat, alternatively. Ifyou spoke

Afrikaans inthe English week, you had to pay a fine and visa versa. I don't suppose it was very fair as the children and I all spoke Afrikaans fluently. Chris was very quiet in the English week and was practically the only one to pay any fines. He learnt very quickly and soon spoke English very well and without an Afrikaans accent, I might add. CHAPTER 41

The children went to spend a holiday with Max and came back minus any clothes. The bastard still hadn't paid any maintenance, so I went to my lawyer, and he wrote a letter to

Max telling him to return the clothing.

The Public Prosecutor was just as frustrated as I was with the Magistrate for letting Max off time and time again even though he had suspended sentences for not paying. What I did not know was that my lawyer and the Public Prosecutor were friends and that the

Public Prosecutor had become the Magistrate!

We had to appear in Court again. I felt it was an utter waste of time and told my lawyer so. He told me to be in Court come hell or high water. So I went. I could not believe it when I saw the ex Public Prosecutor on the bench and he winked at me! My very supportive lawyer was there for me too.

The now new Magistrate didn't even give the new Public Prosecutor a chance to do any prosecuting. I don't think I'll ever forget that day in court.

The case went more or less like this.

Magistrate: So why don't you pay maintenance for your children?

Max: Because she won't spend it on them.

Magistrate: Don't your children eat, do they go to school and how do they get there.

That is spending money on them.

Max: I didn't think about that.

Magistrate: Do your children wear uniforms to school? They cost money you know.

160 Max: Yes, but they only have two each.

Magistrate: How many uniforms can they wear at a time?

Max: Only one, I suppose. I didn't think of it that way.

Magistrate: Well one on the back and one in the wash seem sufficient.

Max: I suppose, but they haven't got very much other clothing. The clothing they've got could fit in a Checkers bag.

At this point my lawyer stepped up to the bench and handed a copy of the letter he had written to Max to the Magistrate. I think he knew full well that Max had never received it as there was no postal delivery to where Max stayed. The lawyer and Magistrate had a discussion in undertones.

Magistrate: I believe the reason that your children have no clothes at the flat where they live is because you failed to return them with the children on their last visit to you. I have here a letter written to you a month ago asking you to return the clothing.

Max: No reply.

Magistrate: What exactly do you contribute towards the care of your children and don't you feel they would be slightly better off if you did pay something?

Max: I didn't think.

Magistrate: I do believe we have been through all this before. I am now going to enforce your suspended sentence and give you plenty of time to think. You are sentenced to three months.

I could have kissed him. He gave me another wink that said "got you this time, you miserable bastard".

16 1 As I walked out of court with my lawyer, Gretchen,·who was now married to Max (poor thing), came toward me screaming all the dirty names that she could think of. My lawyer said I should sue her for defamation or slander or something to that effect, but I told him I wasn't going to waste any more time on lost causes. He then advised me to fetch the children's clothes, but to take someone with me. I should wait in the car and send the children in to fetch their things. Chris went with me and Gary and Rory went in, Tim didn't want to go. When they came out and loaded all their things into the boot of the car, it was almost full. Gary said Gretchen had told him to tell me to keep my doors locked because she was going to come and kill me. Gary was very upset by this and said he'd make sure the door was always locked. CHAPTER 42

So Max went to jail for three months and we had peace. It was good to know that we wouldn't have his disruptive presence for a while.

We went to visit Mom and Dad as well as Chris's parents at least once a month. What a difference between them and Jurie's parents. They always treated me like royalty. Ifthe children were with, they would always leave with their packet of 'koekies'.

A few months later, Chris and I were sitting in the lounge with the front door open, as it was a very hot evening. Suddenly this voice said 'can I come in'? My heart nearly stopped. Max was out of jail and I was sure he was going to kill me.

But Gemini is the twin sign and it was the good one that arrived at our door that night. He apologized and said he had time to think. He realized it was entirely his own fault that he had landed up in jail. Then he said he had someone in the car downstairs and could he bring her up. I told him if that some one was Gretchen, no.

Gretchen had left him while he was in jail and this was his new girl friend, Margie.

Where or how he had met her and formed a relationship so soon, I really don't know.

They got into the habit of popping in, uninvited. It got on my nerves, but Chris took it in his stride.

Margie had two daughters around the same ages as my boys. One day. Margie asked me what it was like to be married to Max. I told her that if she liked to travel and didn't mind making friends with the Messenger of the Court, she would be alright. CLilvfB EVERY MOUNTAIN

One day Max said they were selling up and moving to Durban. I was delighted and knew it would stop the unexpected visits. Max still hadn't paid any maintenance, because he was unemployed at the time and living off of MargieMer husband had recently died and she had collected a reasonable sum in Insurance. Max said they had a dining room suite he was selling, so I told him I would speak to Chris about it. Then I thought of a Master

Plan. He wanted Rl20 for the dining room suite, but had to pay me RI 50 for maintenance. I told him I would buy it and when he brought it to the flat I would give him the money. I then went to the Court and deposited the money for his maintenance.

When he delivered the furniture, I gave him the receipt. He was furious, but there was nothing he could do about it. The next day I went and drew the money at the court. That was the last maintenance I ever got out of him.

I loved my job at Illings. The whole staff was fun to work with and we had a lot of laughter in the office. We did not know, however, that there was a duct between our office and that of Graham, the Financial Manager. He could hear all the merriment, but not the actual spoken words. He called me into his office one day to complain. I asked him if he had any complaints about our work. When he said our work was very good, I asked him if he would rather have an unhappy staff working for him, or a staff that simply loved working for him. He said "Oh, go and laugh some more, just tell them to tone it down a bit."

Illings,Mazda merged with Chrvsler and intended moving to Pretoria. We were all upset, even though they wanted all of us to move to Pretoria too. For the month before the move, we each had a file marked X and at 4.30 p.m. the bottles would be brought out and CLilvfB EVERY MOUNTAIN the party, or should I say wake, would begin. Some of the girls opted to take positions at CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

C I M or Head Office. The few of us who decided to go to Pretoria were given a pool car.

We used to meet in Isando and travel to Pretoria together. The atmosphere at Pretoria was just not the same. The daily travelling became quite tedious. After three months of this it all became a bit much and I resigned. Graham suggested that I move to Pretoria and offered to pay all relocation costs, including curtains, school uniforms etc. But that meant

I had to sign a two year contract. I thought about it briefly, but there were the children, settled in their school, and Chris close to his work. Inthe end I left and got ajob at

Premier Milling in Newton.

Chris and I went shopping at the Hyperama one day and there two girls, with really lovely figures, were skipping in front of the store to promote the sale of skipping ropes.

I bought one and as soon as we got home, started skipping.

I skipped all Saturday afternoon and never lost an ounce. On Sunday, my whole body was painful. I thought I'd pulled a muscle in my abdomen. The pain would come and go, but when it came, I would break into a cold sweat, it was that bad. I went to work on

Monday, thinking it would have passed by Tuesday. By Wednesday I thought I was dying, so went to see a doctor. I told him about the skipping and he had a good laugh. He examined me and said my condition had nothing to do with the skipping. It was either gallstones or an ulcer. He sent me for a Barium meal test. After the test I was given a cup of Milo and they said they would advise the Doctor of the results.

I had been told by friends that Barium meal makes you constipated and I should take a dose of castor oil to avoid this. I stopped at a chemist on the way home and bought a bottle. What they didn't tell me at the hospital was that the Milo was laced with castor oil too. I had the runs for three days. The Doctor phoned me with the results, saying it was gallstones. He booked me in at the Park Lane Clinic for the operation to take place the next Thursday. Mom came up from Airlie to look after the children and Chris.

After the gallbladder operation, Chris brought them all to visit me. I had received beautiful bouquets from friends and from my work, but the very best was a bunch of wild flowers that Tim had picked in the veld. He came in proudly clutching them in his little hands, and my heart melted. I shed a few tears after they had left.

Visiting hours were from 7.00 to 8.00 o'clock and on Friday night they were late. I don't know how or why, but I just knew that Chris had smashed my car. When Mom arrived first, all flushed, breathless and very flustered; I said "Chris has smashed my car, hasn't he?" Mom didn't know what to say. She didn't want to tell on Chris, but really had no option. He did have an accident, but the car was still able to be driven. He then went to

Marble Hall to borrow money from his Father, to have it fixed before I came out of hospital. That was what made them so late.

His scheme did not work as I came out of hospital on the Sunday. I was furious with him.

How was I going to get to work whilst my car was in the Panel beaters? His car was still out of action in Marble Hall. He managed to borrow a Bakkie from a friend. He would drop me off at Kempton Park Station to catch the train to Johannesburg; from there I had to catch a bus to Newtown, The same rigmarole to get back home. On the first day I took the wrong train. Itwas the express that didn't stop at Kempton Park, which meant I went straight through to Pretoria and had to catch another train back. By the time I got to

Kempton Park I was ready to commit murder. CLil\1B EVERY MOUNTAIN

I gave poor Chris hell and he couldn't stop apologizing. When I got my car back from the

Panel beaters my sense of humour returned. I recovered very quickly from my operation and my bad temper towards Chris, but I hated catching trains and busses. CLil\ffi EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 43

I think what I loved most about Chris was that he was the total opposite of Max. He was patient, considerate, a great listener and he was fantastic with the children. Ifthey had a problem, they would go to him. He would sort it out as best he could, then tell them to go and do a back somersault. When they said they couldn't he would take them out onto the lawn and show them how. They never did manage it, but loved to see him do it.

Chris was by no means an angel. He had a friend, Kassie, who caused a lot of friction between us. Chris, being the loyal frie!ld was stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Chris used to finish work early on a Friday and Kassie would be waiting at the flat to go somewhere or other with him. I tolerated this until I found out that Kassie was trying to fix him up with blind dates. I told Chris I was fine with that, but if that was what he wanted he should move in with Kassie. I was not prepared to play second fiddle to

Kassie. Chris decided he preferred me to Kassie and we saw much less of him after that.

One Sunday, Chris decided we should go to Pinedene which was halfway between

Pretoria and Croydon, for our picnic. His family had lived there for a number of years when he was growing up. It was a lovely place, very urban, more like a farming community. There was a stream, lovely willow trees and luscious grass. The children made straight for the stream and were really enjoying themselves. Chris had other ideas; he took me by the hand and said there were a couple of other places he wanted to show me. We climbed over a little koppie and he took me into a huge concrete pipe which he CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

said had been their Clubhouse. He was that randy that my clothes were off in seconds and I didn't even feel the discomfit of the concrete under me.

When we got back to the stream the children wanted to know where we had been.

Chris laughed and said to his old Clubhouse. They wanted to know why we hadn't taken them with us, he just smiled and said he'd show them the next time we came to

Pinedene, and started the fire for a braai.

No matter where we went for our Sunday picnic, Chris always managed to find a secluded spot for a bit of hanky panky. When we were at home he would give the children money and send them to the shops for chocolates, always insisting that they all go together.

Chris asked me to marry him, but I was happy with the way things were, the sex was awesome, we lived a comfortable life, and the children adored him and we were content.

I was wary. I had made a huge mistake once, nearly twice, and I didn't want to do that for a third time. Chris continued to ask me time and time again to marry him, and Ijust avoided giving a direct answer by saying 'one day'. Eventually I told him I would marry him on the 30th February, he just sighed, and left it at that for a while.

Itwas the Christmas holidays and Max came to fetch the children to spend Christmas with him. On the spur of the moment Chris and I decided to go to Durban for a few days.

We left after work and arrived in Durban in the middle of the night. We hadn't booked a place to stay so spent the rest of the night down at the beach. The next morning we managed to find a room at a Boarding house near the Beach Front. We went down to the beach and it was so hot that December that the beach sand actually burnt the soles of our feet. We spent a lot of time in the ocean and got thoroughly sun burnt. I took Chris to show him my house in Malvern, but it was gone and the whole area had been turned into a parking lot. We travelled down to Park Rynie and had a swim in the

Tidal Pool. Itwas like being on Honeymoon. We had a lovely time and then it was back home, and back to the grindstone.

Gerald still phoned me once in a while, but I must give him his due, he never tried to interfere with my relationship with Chris. He said he was glad that Chris made me happy, because he felt I deserved it. IfI ever needed him he would be there for me.

Life was great; we went dancing at Bapsfontein with Antoinette and Attie at least once a month, and attended many house parties within our circle of friends. There was Be, who shared a phone with me at work. She became my best friend, but I didn't like her husband at all. He used to beat her up regularly. I asked her why she didn't leave him as they had no children, so I couldn't see any reason for her to put up with him. She told me she had tried to once, but he found her and gave her the worst beating ever. He told her that if she ever tried that again he would kill her. I understood where she was coming from because

I had been in the same position. Inthose days, these were domestic matters; there were no laws against woman abuse.

Doreen and Brian were great fun. With a few drinks in her, Doreen. would treat us to a strip show and dancing on the table. Avon and Loufrom Denysville were more sedate, a lovely couple. All in all, we had a lovely circle of friends and a very busy social life.

Mom and Dad went to Port Elizabeth to visit Uncle Ken and Olive for a few months.

Unck Ken had a boat building business. Dad helped him in the stores and Mom did some typing in the office. He wanted Mom and Dad to move to Port Elizabeth, but Dad was a

170 Lowvelder through and through and would never have been happy in Port Elizabeth for very long.

Chris and I were taking the children to the Zoo in Pretoria one Sunday, when some idiot came racing down the street and sideswiped my car and the one in front of me and sped away. Neither of us got his number, and although we reported the incident to the police, they never found him. So another Insurance Claim and back to the Panel beaters for my little car. It was trains and busses all over again.

171 CHAPTER 44

Kassie started coming around again. This resulted in a lot of arguments between Chris and myself, one Friday I walked into the flat just in time to hear Kassie saying to Chris

"you're not married to her, come let's go!" This caused a humdinger of a row and I told

Chris I had had enough and I wanted him out of my flat by the end of the weekend. He left with Kassie and when he came back on Saturday I had all his things packed. He left very reluctantly. The children were so angry with me. They couldn't understand why I had kicked Chris out. I had mixed feelings. We had been so happy until Kassie started interfering again.

At this time Mom and Dad had been back from Port Elizabeth a few months. Mom phoned me to say that Uncle Ken had passed away. I took Mom and Dad down to Port

Elizabeth for the funeral and we found out that he had gassed himself in his car at the business premises. He never left a letter or a note, so we never found out why he had committed suicide. At the funeral I met cousins I had not seen in years. Fritz and

Darlene's boyfriend, Stafford, both lived in Johannesburg. Mom and I saw them off at the airport with promises to get together as soon as I got back. When once we were back, I contacted Fritz and we went to his place for a braai before Mom and Dad went back to

Airlie. I met, June, Fritz's wife for the first time and Darlene. whom I hadn't seen since we were children.

We met up often after that, it was nice getting to know the family again. Their mother, my Auntie had remarried since the death of Uncle Des some years before. Gerald, who still phoned often, started visiting again after finding out that Chris and I had broken up. Chris also phoned, always with some excuse or another, such as his tax number or was my sister still going to knit him the jersey she had said she would. Then he started nagging as to when he could see me again. I suppose it was a case of cutting off my nose to spite my face, but I was very stubborn and kept saying no, even though I missed him a lot and would have liked to see him if it wasn't for Kassie.

I was starting to feel the pinch of having to pay for the bigger flat on my own. Then

Fritz said they had a flat upstairs in their house and suggested I rent it. I moved to

Kensington and the children went to boarding school in Nelspruit

I was on my way to work one morning and was stopped at a robot in Roberts Avenue, when I glanced into the rear view mirror and saw this orange car coming at a speed and I just knew it would never stop in time. I took my car out of gear and put my foot on the brake so that I wouldn't hit the car in front of me. The lady driver hit my car so hard that the boot was half its original size. I got out of the car and even before I got close to her she put her arms over her head and started crying, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry". I suppose I must have looked as ifl was going to kill her or something. That was the 4th accident in a year. When I went to fill in the claim at the Insurance Company, the clerk there said "we don't need a file for your claims, we need a filing cabinet!" I couldn't even say that none of the accidents were my fault, because I had said I was driving when Chris smashed my car.

June and I went to Airlie one Saturday to fetch the children for the weekend. On our way back from Nelspruit on the Sunday, we were so busy chatting that I wasn't paying attention to the speed I was driving at and I got caught in a speed trap. The fine was

Rl50 and my salary was only R350 per month. I really didn't know how I was going to pay it. I thought I would have to go to court and beg to pay it off.

Chris phoned on Monday and asked again when he could see me. I told him he could visit me in jail. He asked why, and when I told him, he said there was no way he would see me in jail and that he would pay the fine. Little did I know where that fine would lead me.

Of course there were strings attached, I either had to give him the summons to pay or collect the money from him to pay it myself. He suggested that I come through to

Kempton Park, and since I would be there, we might as well go to the Drive In.How could I refuse, not that I wanted to.

We went to the Drive In. Chris came armed with a bottle of whiskey, glasses and all!

After the movie we ended up at a little dam called Bloupan. It was like being a teenager again, making out in the backseat of the car. This became a biweekly date, with me either spending the night in his room at the Boarding House where he lived and leaving at the crack of dawn, or him following me home and spending the night. One had to go through the house to get to my flat, so when Chris left in the morning, he would go out through the balcony door, over the garage roof, onto the perimeter wall and down into the street.

This carried on for some months, then Chris and I decided to get back together and he moved in with me again.

Fritz, used to jokingly call Chris 'Koosie". Because Fritz,was going bald and was quite short, Chris retaliated by calling him 'Half Jack,' Half a Kojack. They actually got on very well. Everyone liked Chris, even Mom.

June and Fritz both worked on my route to my work, so I played taxi. I would drop them off in the morning and pick them up again in the afternoon. They chipped in for petrol expenses and it worked very well. Then Chris's car gave in for the final time and wasn't worth fixing. He then used my car, and I drove_ Fritz's car.

I got home from work one Friday and my car was parked in the street as usual. Chris was always the first one out in the morning, so we parked the cars accordingly in the drive way. But as the next day was Saturday, that arrangement didn't apply, because only

Fritz worked on a Saturday and he usually caught the bus. As I parked I noticed that my car's lights were on. I went inside and got the key that was hanging on the key rack at the front door. When I went to switch off the lights I saw that the passenger side of the car was smashed. When I got into the flat Chris was just coming out of the shower. He asked me if I had seen my car. I said I had. He asked me if I'd seen the other side. I said

I had. He looked puzzled and said "then why are you not shouting and screaming at me?"

I told him that shouting and screaming was not going to fix my car. He was!

I was not going to be humiliated again by the guy from the Insurance Company. I got three quotes and he paid. He said he did not want the money back but would I please file the claim because the R1200 would be better off in my bank account. So I did and was lucky enough not to get the same claims guy. I told Chris that the day I smashed the car I would write it off. There is many a true word spoken injest.

We went camping with Antoinette and A ttie_one weekend, but I would rather have stayed at home in bed. I had the most awful period pains. I think the only time I am bad tempered is when I am in pain or not feeling well. Antoinette'.s daughter was being a real brat that day and kept on kicking me. Itwas most annoying. I shouted at her but she would not stop. Eventually I told Antoinette_to control her brat which ended up in an argument. Chris and I packed up our things and with the children, headed for home. The next day I went to the doctor, who sent me to a gynaecologist, and before I knew it, I was back in the Park Lane Clinic, having a hysterectomy. Instead of listening to the doctor and staying home for six weeks, I went back to work three weeks later. Bad mistake!

Itwas a few weeks before Christmas and I was feeling so sick, I had developed an abscess on the wound, the size of a rugby ball. It was very, very painful.

The children were home for the school holidays and it wasn't very pleasant for them. I had no patience and was snapping at everyone. Chris tried his best to keep the peace, took the washing to the laundrette and even tried to do the ironing. He would take the children to Rhodes Park, the public swimming pool and generally kept them out of my way. Even poor: Fritz .had to suffer my bad temper. He used to come and watch TV with us as they didn't have one. I couldn't stand all the hovering and asking how I felt, Ijust wanted to be left alone.

I was in the shower when the abscess burst, the stench was revolting but the relief was great. It now had to be drained and that process was most painful. I had to dip a bandage into disinfectant and stuff it into the wound. It took yards of the bandage and burnt like hell. This happened twice a day.

Chris asked me what the children wanted for Christmas, but in this state I had not given

Christmas a thought. I knew they wanted bicycles, but it was very expensive when you had to buy three. Chris, of course, pleaded their case and said he would go halves with me. I was feeling so damned sick that I gave in without much of a fight, but I had to dig into my Insurance money nest egg. Chris did all of the Christmas shopping and did he have a ball. He spent twice as much as

I would have, but I really didn't care. I was feeling too sorry for myself, because I had now got pleurisy on top of my woes. Chris really tried to cheer me up. He bought me a bottle of Glyva and 5th Ave Cold Duck, two of my favorites, but I just could not face any of it. So between 'Koosie' and 'Half Jack" they fmished the lot. I only started coming right after Christmas. CHAPTER 45

Christmas was over and the children were in their element with their yellow ten speed racing bicycles, that Chris had made a complete fool of himself over. He had gone to

Rave stores to buy the bikes and the salesman asked who they were for, to which Chris replied, his sons! The salesman asked him how long he had been married and he said five years. When the salesman asked him how old his sons were, he stuttered 11, 12 and

13. I was sitting in the car when he came out of the shop, red in the face, pushing two bikes, with the salesman at his heels with the third one. Shame, poor man never could tell a lie without making a hash of it.

We spent a very quiet New Year, then the holidays were over and I was feeling a lot better, so it was back to work.

Chris was working for a Contracting agent and most of the jobs they sent him on were in the Johannesburg area. The new contract on offer, however, was on a Diamond Mine at Oranjemund in South West Africa. He would be there for six months, with a ten day break after three months. Off he went to South West, the children went back to school in

Nelspruit and I was back at Premier Milling. I had a lot of catching up to do, as very little had been done in my job whilst I was off sick. I worked late every night and by the end of

January, I was up to date.

On the 7'11 February I visited my friend Miggie? the one who read the tea leaves. She made tea and read the tea leaves and told me that she saw me in a hospital bed. I laughed and told her she was reading the past as I had spent the most of November and

December in bed. Itwas a lovely evening, but very hot, so we spent most of our time in the pool. I

left at about ten and on my way home, every time I changed gears my leg hurt. I thought

I had overdone it in the pool.

The next morning as I got into the shower, I got the fright of my life; my left leg was

swollen to double its size and was black. Needless to say, I did not go to work, but

straight to the Doctor. The Doctor told me I had to go straight into hospital. I protested. I

had too much time off work recently. All he said was 'do you want to die' so I made him

phone my boss and I went to the Kensington Clinic. Itwas the gth February, my birthday,

and the very last birthday surprise that I needed.

I received a few letters from Chris, short and sweet. He wasn't much of a letter writer.

But there was a beautiful birthday card from him that made me cry. I was feeling sorry for myself and I missed him so much.

I spent four weeks in the Kensington Clinic and in that time taught the staff to play poker. I think they enjoyed it as much as I did. I became such an institution in that place that when they took stock, which was once a week, they pretended to dust me off. I must say, the staff were fantastic and made my stay as pleasant as possible.

The unpleasant part was the injections every two hours, and the drawing of blood daily. I had a deep vein thrombosis and the vein had become infected. I got one injection in the stomach for the thrombosis and a second one in the backside for the infection. I gave up counting them when they passed the hundred. My stomach looked like a spotted beach ball and was colourfully bruised from purple to yellow. I suppose my backside looked the same, but fortunately I couldn't see it.

·--. , The worst was that I was not allowed out of bed at all, so it was bedpans and body washes. Itwas a very hot February and after a week my hair was greasy and my whole body was aching for a good old soak in a bath. I asked my Doctor if I could have a quick bath or shower, in fact I begged him. He was adamant and said that only dirty people bath. A nurse could wash my hair in a bowl of water. We tried that and by the time we were done, all the bedding was soaked and had to be changed. But I did feel a lot better.

By the time we had washed my hair for the third time, we managed to do it without getting everything wet. Itwas fun and broke the monotony of lying in bed all day with my legs up.

There were about six men who used to walk past our ward and wave. They had a very strange sort of cap dressings on their heads, very hard to describe. I asked the one nurse if they had all been in the same kind of accident as they all had the same kind of injury.

She laughed and said yes they did. They were all going bald and had hair transplants.

Vanity, thy name is man!

I was bored out of my mind, and had read so many books that my eyes were sore. God, I missed Chris. He had been with me through my Gall Bladder and Hysterectomy operations, but they were both very short stays in hospital. Now poor June, who was pregnant, was the one who had to do all the fetching and carrying. I felt sorry for her as she didn't drive and had to catch the bus. She faithfully came to visit every second day.

My other friends all came to see me the first week that I was in hospital, but as I did not look sick, their visits dwindled. They all lived out east of Johannesburg, so it was a bit far for regular visits.

180 After four weeks at the Kensington Clinic, loving the staff, and getting privileges, like coffee whenever I wanted it, I was transferred to the Lady Dudley Hospital to be closer to the Specialist.

The ambulance attendants came and loaded me onto a stretcher. I said goodbye to the wonderful staff with tears in my eyes. The one paramedic sat in the back of the

Ambulance with me and kept staring at me. I had my X-rays with me and my name was · on them. He eventually asked me if my name was Helen. What a memory he had. It turned out that he was Paul, the younger brother of Bernard, with whom I went to school up to Standard one! I vaguely remembered the family who lived near by, but I couldn't have been more than 8 or 9 years old the last time I saw them. I didn't even remember that Bernard had a younger brother!

I spent a week at the Lady Dudley, saw the Specialist; had more X-rays, injections, and blood tests. What a difference between the hospitals. It really is the staff that either makes your stay pleasant or a pain. I couldn't wait to get out of there. I saw the very first

Episode of Dallas there, then, it was "home, sweet home', elastic stockings and all.

181 CHAPTER 46

By this time it was mid March. June and Fritz organized a braai in honour of my homecoming and all the cousins came over. It was wonderful to be home again. I still had the champagne I had bought for my birthday in the boot of my car. We put it on ice and popped a couple of corks and got nicely sozzled.

It was great sleeping in my own bed again, even though it had to be elevated at the foot end. Instead of using bricks that were not available, we used the whole set of

Encyclopaedia Brittanica. Imagine sleeping on all that History! But the concept worked well.

I went back to work and had a lot of catching up to do once again, even though-XiY: the accountant had brought some of my work to do at the hospital. My Boss was a rather detestable Italian, called Carlos. On my return he didn't even ask me how I was, but said, very sarcastically "oh well, they've removed all your insides, now maybe they'll start amputating your arms and legs!" Charming.

He would stand in his office door way and yell across the open plan office for me to come to his office. I got to a point when I had enough of this and went into his office and asked him ifl looked like a dog? Then I told him that if he wanted to speak to me he could lift up his phone, dial my extension and ask me in a decent way, to come to his office. He was shocked that I had told him off, but after that, treated me with more respect. Viv. Angie_ and I were good friends and often, over a drink after work, would rip the Italian to pieces. Nobody liked him very much. A letter arrived from Chris saying he would be home soon, but didn't give a date. He was missing me and the children and was very bored out there on his own. He was in the mine all day and there was very little to do at night.

At the end of March I woke up at about 5.30 one morning with a disturbance on the balcony. I opened my eyes and there he was! He had climbed up on the wall and over the garage roof. I have never been so happy to see someone. He said the look on my face was worth every minute he had spent in South West Africa. I held up my arms and he fell into bed with me. He held me tight for a long, long time. Itwas the greatest feeling to be in his arms agam.

That night Chris took Fritz, June and me out to dinner, where he proposed again. I said yes, but forgot to add on the 30th February. Back home, we tried to make love on the elevated bed, but kept sliding down and banging our heads on the headboard. After a lot of giggling and laughter we managed to turn around our feet to the headboard and got it right.

He next morning I got up and had a shower and was getting ready for work, "Where do you think you're going" Chris asked. "To work" I answered. "Oh no, you're not; we are going to get married TODAY!" Easier said than done!

We went to the Johannesburg Magistrate's court, but couldn't get an appointment until the end of April. Kempton Park was no better and even Benoni was fully booked. I couldn't believe that so many people wanted to get married at that time. Even with all the rebuffs I still wasn't off the hook, we fmally made an appointment to get married on the

11th April at the Alberton Magistrate's Court. I asked the woman at the counter how much it would be. She laughed and said there was no cost to getting married; it was the

divorce that costs.

I reminded Chris that he was supposed to go back to South West Africa before that date, but he said he couldn't possibly go back and leave me, after we had just got married. He was prepared to break his contract.

I phoned Mom to tell her and Dad that I was getting married, and can you believe it, she asked me, who to! I was so taken aback, I replied "to Abie Cohen". Mom still didn't get it; she replied that she had once worked for a lawyer called Abie Cohen. I knew this, as she had mentioned it often, I couldn't believe she was so gullible. Then I phoned the children. All I heard was 'yaaaay', they were really happy about it, and would be home for the Easter Holidays to attend, I phoned Penny too, who was happy for me, even though she didn't know Chris at all.

When I went back to work the next day Vivtold me that the Italian had said that I must be pregnant, getting married in such a hurry. What an idiot, he knew that I'd had a

Hysterectomy at the beginning of November the previous year.

I had to get something to wear and managed to find a cream suite, which matched the cream suite that Chris already had. When he bought it, I thought he was being ridiculous and asked him when he thought he was going to wear it. Well, now nearly a year later, was the perfect opportunity.

The big day arrived, we went off to Alberton. June and Darlene were our witnesses.

I don't know how they managed it, but that night, the cousins gave us a surprise we really didn't expect. They held a reception for us with all our friends. Poor Chris had to give a speech and every time he started they would sing 'Tant Koek se hoenderhaan', or

'Why CLIJ\1B EVERY MOUNTAIN was he born so beautiful'. I expected him to disappear over the garage roof, over the wall and into Rhodes Park! He took it like a man though, told them about the children playing

Tokktokkie on him and him confronting me in a towel. How the children and I taught him to speak English, and how he had progressed from "Come to I, me wants to tell you a question" to being able to speak fluently. I don't think he was ever as bad as that He had all our guests in fits oflaughter. CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN

CHAPTER 47

So here we were, Chris unemployed and me hating the Italian and by now, my job too.

Chris went to see his old boss at Murray and Roberts, where he had worked when I first met him, and got his old job back. Then Bev phoned me to say that they were looking for a Creditors Supervisor at Illings, ,Isando, I applied and got the job. So Chris and I had come full circle, back to where we started.

Stafford and Darlene had an Estate Agency in Edenvale and we asked them to look out for a house for us to rent in that area. It would be a lot closer for us, as we were both working in Isando and the flat at Fritz and June's was very small.

Darlen e _phoned and asked if we would be interested in buying a house. One had just come onto their books and was a bargain at R12 000, all we would need for a deposit was

Rl 200. We went to look at the house. It had three bedrooms, a lounge-cum-dining room, a fair-sized kitchen, separate bathroom and toilet and parquet floors. There was a carport and storeroom in the spacious back garden and a smaller front garden. The house was small, but quite a bit larger than the flat at Croydon. I still had change from my nest egg that Chris hadn't managed to spend on Christmas presents and practically all of his three months pay that he had the Agency pay into my Bank account whilst he was in SWA. We made an offer and bought the house.

We had a bit of trouble getting the tenants who were renting the place out. Finally, we were able to move in on the 1st July. We were in for a shock as they had left the place in a dreadful mess. There were no handles or locks on the inner doors and the walls were filthy. They were cough mixture addicts and there were cough mixture bottles in every cupboard and all over the garden. They had kept chickens and there was chicken manure all over the garden and even inthe house. In the storeroom we found an old rolled up carpet with a dead chicken reeking inside it! There was scrap metal all over the garden and an old two ton truck that they left behind. None of this was there when we viewed the house, it seems that once the tenants knew they had to get out they really let things go.

The lawn hadn't been mowed and the grass and the weeds were knee high.

Chris went to the Hardware Shop for door handles, paint and brushes and got stuck in and did a major clean up.

The children were home on school holidays and we got them to collect all he scrap and load it onto the truck, which we pushed out into the street. I phoned the Municipality and reported an abandoned truck in front of our house and could they please do something about it. A few days later it was towed away.

Chris was fantastic, he worked really hard, going down on his hands and knees to polish the floors until you could see your face in them. He put up burglar bars and fixed everything that needed fixing.

Then we got stuck into the garden. That was quite expensive. We had to get a lawnmower and garden tools, as living in a flat, we didn't have any. Chris mowed the lawns and I weeded the beds and inno time we had the garden looking good too. A home of my own at last!

I was so happy in that little house and Chris was so easy to love. He let me do as I pleased within bounds, and was always helpful around the house. Housework was no longer a chore; we actually had fun doing everything together. I'd do the cooking and he CLIJ\1B EVERY MOUNTAIN

would do the dishes. I'd do the dusting and he'd polish the floors. He would take the washing to the launderette and bring it back neatly folded. I would iron it in front of TV.

Phyllis and Gail came to visit one Saturday afternoon and were amazed when Chris came to tell me how much he needed for the washing machines and driers. They thought I had him well trained.

June and Fritz w ere going to America for two years, so the day they left we gave them a farewell party. We invited family and friends and had a braai. Their flight only left in the evening so we all spent the day together and dropped them off at the airport in time for their flight.

Francis and Amelia were now living in Germiston so we saw quite a lot of them too.

Chris started nagging me to take the boys out of boarding school and bring them home.

We decided to let them finish the year in Nelspruit and then they could start the New

Year in Edenvale.

I had started a new nest egg. Every time I wrote out a cheque I would round off the

amount to the nearest RI O and at the end of the month when I reconciled to my bank

statement I would transfer the excess to a savings account.

Chris would come home every Friday with a bunch of flowers and his pay packet. He

would have filled the car with petrol and bought some liquid refreshment for the

weekend, and the rest was for me to bank. He never asked me how much we had in the

bank, he was happy as long as he had his weekend tipple, his smokes and good food.

He often came home as I was cooking. He would tell me I had been on his mind all day,

switch off the stove, and lead me to the bedroom, as if he could not wait a moment CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN longer. He would make love to me as if we hadn't made love for months. We sometimes ate at midnight, sometimes not t all! CHAPTER 48

Dad's old friend, John Beetge lived in an old age home. Auntie Liz, a sister-in-law of - ,

Mom's, lived in Malvern. Chris would often fetch them to come and have Sunday lunch with us. I think Chris was trying to match make there. Chris was very fond of people old and young; and it was always at his instigation that we had them over, together.

There was a family that lived across the road from us. They had a son of about 14 who was a bit backward. He loved to come and help us in the garden and Chris always made a big fuss of him.

When my children were home for a weekend or school holiday, Chris would spend a lot of time with them playing Cricket, Rounders or Soccer in the street. Of course all the children in the neighbourhood joined in. They all adored him and I sometimes felt quite left out.

John Beetge had a Toyota Corona but was not allowed to drive it at the Old Age Home, so asked us if we would mind parking it at our house. We could use it if we wanted to. At that time we only had one car, my dear blue Mazda, so John's car saved us a lot of hassles. I eventually offered to buy_John's car for a deposit of RlOO and the balance paid off at Rl 00 per month. He accepted and gave it to us for Rl 000. Chris was in his element.

We hadn't seen hide or hair of Max for nearly two years. Chris wanted to adopt the boys.

We found out that if Max had not contacted them in two years we could adopt without his

190 consent. We discussed it with the boys and they were all for it. January 1980 would be two years and we could then go ahead.

This was a very happy time in my life, things just couldn't be better. I had a man who thought the world of me and loved my children as if they were his own. My children thought he was the best thing since Chappies Bubble gum. The parents-in-law were wonderful. I felt as ifl had finally made it to the top of Mount Everest.

IfI'd known what a good husband Chris would make I would have married him years before. He certainly made a better husband than a live in lover.

Chris had spent the whole of Saturday afternoon mowing the lawn at the back and front of the house. He had trimmed the edges and it really looked lovely. He stood at the front door, admiring his handiwork. I loved to see him so content with his labours. On Sunday morning he got up to make coffee, when all of a sudden I heard his distressed call

"Helen". I jumped out of bed and went to see what had happened. He was at the front door looking in dismay at his masterpiece. The lawn was covered in dog pooh. Every dog in the neighbourhood had decided to try out this fresh, tidy piece of grass as a toilet!

On Monday Chris and I went to the SPCA to get our own dog. She was large. She was beautiful. She had so much black hair that you couldn't tell the back from the front. She was a Bouviere des Flanders. That anyone could abandon such an adorable creature was beyond me. She was loving, clever and obedient, except when it came to doors. Ifthey were unlocked she would jump up and open the door and let herself in. She let herself in one night and Chris just lifted her back out of the door with his foot. The next day I was really worried about her, shejust lay under the carport and would not eat. When Chris got home, I told him Myra was sick, and I thought he should take her to the Vet.

191 Chris immediately went out to her. He petted her, and ina very sympathetic voice, said

"Shame, Myra, are you sick?" All of a sudden, she was up and prancing around like a puppy! Would you believe it, she had been sulking. Chris had to take the handles off the front and back doors and replace them with door knobs.

Bev and Rem were coming for dinner one night and I had promised to make an Oxtail.

Because it took so long to cook, I started making it the day before. I put the partially cooked food in the fridge. It would only take an hour or so to finish the cooking. When I went to get it out the next day it was gone. I asked Chris what had happened to the

Oxtail. He said "oh that pot of bones. I thought they were for Myra, so gave them to her when I fed her". I could have throttled him, but sent him out to get Kentucky instead.

Bev and Rem thought it was a huge joke, but Chris was inthe dog box that night CHAPTER 49

Chris's parents came to visit us for a week. The old lady had a lot of stories to tell about

Chris as a child. She said he would never wear the same clothes twice. Nothing had changed, he would make an effort to come home and change after work before going anywhere. When he had to go to the Estate Agency to sign some papers, he would not go in his work clothes and insisted on goiug home first. Never mind that people wanted to go home, they would just have to wait.

The old lady cooked the whole week and had supperjust about ready by the time I got home from work. Seeiug that I was being freed from the cookiug I gave Chris a break and did the dishes for him. I really enjoyed having the in-laws visit. They were so easy to get along with.

A few weeks later, Chris's youngest brother, Andries, came for the weekend. I had already arranged to meet Viv, Ivor and Angk, from Premier Milling for drinks after work on Friday. Chris was fiue with that and said he and Andries would catch up over a few drinks at home.

Viv was stuck for a lift home, as Ivor, who was supposed to give him a lift, had left early.

I offered to take him home. He lived somewhere in Benoni. Everything was fme while he was directing me to his place, but on the way back, I got horribly lost. I drove around for hours trying to fmd the route home. It was pretty late; there was not much traffic, so no one to ask for directions. I got up at about eight to start making salads and preparing for the braai. Chris told me to

go back to bed and he would take care of everything. It was a sweet thought, but what did

he know about making potato salad, or any other salad for that matter. I told him to get

out of my kitchen and sent him off to do the safe things like going to buy a Garlic loaf

and some beer. Goodness knows what he would have concocted for the people to eat. I

took two pain pills and got started.

Everyone started arriving at about two and by that time I had a major headache, so took

a few more painkillers and a whiskey and floated through the rest of the afternoon.

_&m got hold of Chris and started giving him a lecture, about letting his wife go out on

her own. Chris put him nicely in his place by telling him that the difference between

them was that he happened to trust his wife.

My car had been towed whilst I was in hospital and we were led a merry dance finding it.

I didn't know which towing company had towed it or where it had been towed to. After

visiting two police stations, we found one that had a report on the accident and were told

where the car was.

The Insurance paid out and I was happily surprised that they paid more than I had

originally paid for the car when I bought it. We paid John Beetg the outstanding balance

on the Toyota but were now back to owning only one car. The balance of the money

went to the nest egg. We talked about buying another car but decided to rather lease a

bakkie through Illings, which we got at a very reasonable rate, but had to wait a couple

of weeks to get it.

195 CHAPTER 50

The children came home for the September school holidays and all of a sudden we found our little house a bit over crowded, so I asked Darlene ,to look out for something a bit bigger. At the end of October Darlene. phoned to say they had just got a new listing in our price range and did we want to come and have a look? We went after Chris had done his usual clean up before going anywhere. I fell in love with the house as I walked into the lounge. It had a face brick fireplace with a face brick wall and little alcoves for ornaments, and was just lovely. The rooms were all much bigger, there was a separate dining room, a garage and Servants quarters, a much bigger garden and I just loved it

Chris loved it too but was worried about whether we could afford it.

The nest eggjust covered the deposit so we made an offer and it was accepted. We could move in on the 1st February, the tenants who were in the house had a lease that ended at the end of January. We decided to keep the other house and rent it out.

Kevin _was still the Workshop Foreman at Illings and had to do the pre delivery service when once the bakkie arrived. Every time I phoned and asked him how long it would be, he had a different excuse. This carried on for weeks. I only realized he was just being spiteful when I phoned the workshop and he was out. One of the other mechanics told me that my bakkie had been ready for ages.

I was furious. I went down to the workshop straight away to get my bakkie. As I was driving out of the yard Kevin was coming in. He started shouting at me saying the bakkie was not ready. I told him, in no uncertain terms, to get lost When I went home I was still furious. Chris was home already and I told him what had happened. He took me and sat me down at the kitchen table and spoke to me like a wise old man. He reminded me that we had so much to be grateful for, three wonderful children; good jobs; two houses; and financial soundness. Was I really going to let

Kevin'_s pettiness upset me so much? Kevin wasn't worth it. I carried those wise words with me into the future.

Chris came home one day having bought a seven single record for me. On it was the song 'All I ever need is you'. He played it to me over and over again, he was quite a romantic. He had a habit of playing special songs for people he was fond of too.

Chris started bringing up the oddest subjects, he said he had seen an advert for coffins that were quite reasonable, and when he died he didn't want a fancy coffin that would cost a fortune, and then rot in the ground.

He also started behaving strangely, like taking all and sundry to look at the new house.

He even took his Boss to see it. I told him he was pestering the tenants who were in the house at the time. It was as if he was so proud of his acquisition and wanted everyone he knew to know about it.

It was his birthday on the 2°d December. He was a great Beatles fan. I got up very early that morning and put on a record with 'They say it's your Birthday'. I made coffee and put his present on the pillow. Then I went and switched the HiFi on at full blast. He woke up, smiled at my efforts and said "you know it's my last birthday'. I told him not to talk such nonsense. He was only twenty nine. The children came home from Boarding School permanently and Chris was satisfied.

They would start school in Edenvale in the New Year. December was very busy. We went Christmas shopping together and this time I held the purse strings and stopped him overspending. The Illings_Christmas Party was a huge success. Itwas a month of parties and braai's.

Chris wanted to go to Pongola for a few days before Christmas as he had three brothers living there. We then planned to go to my Mom and Dad for Christmas and to his Mom and Dad for New Year. I wanted to stay at home, but eventually gave in. night, sort of gentle. He murmured over and over that he loved me until I fell asleep in his

arms.

Christmas came at last for the children. They were up at the crack of dawn and nobody was allowed to sleep late. We had the present opening ceremony before we even had time for coffee. Chris spent the whole morning with the boys. They played cricket, climbed the big Jacaranda tree in the back yard, and did back somersaults on the lawn.

Dad parked off on the verandah with a book and John sat in the kitchen watching Mom and I cook.'

Christmas lunch was enjoyed by everyone. The Duck was golden brown and succulent and the gammon tasty. Vegetables out of Dad's garden were fresh and satisfying. Chris complimented Mom and said it was the best meal he had ever eaten.

We did the dishes and went out onto the verandah to play darts. Chris was sitting on

Dad's chair in the comer and pulled me down to it on his lap. Chris was very attentive the whole day. Every time he got the chance I would get a hug and a kiss. I thought it was a

Christmas thing.

We played darts all afternoon. When it got too dark for darts, we went in and lit the lamps. We made sandwiches with the leftovers from lunch, cleaned up the kitchen and sent the boys to bed. We decided to play cards. At about ten Dad and IQbrr._opted for bed, so Mom, Chris and I played on. Chris called it quits at about half past eleven, but

Mom was enjoying herself and wanted to carry on. I agreed to play a few more hands, although I was also feeling quite tired.

200 Itmust have been about midnight by the time we finished playing. I went to the room with the torch; Chris woke up and asked me to switch off the light. Disgruntled, I did. I got undressed in the dark and got into bed. CHAPTER 52

I was just dozing off when Chris started snoring. I nudged him to turn over. When he didn't, Ipoked him in the ribs, but he didn't budge, just kept on snoring. Icouldn't believe it, soIwent to get a cold wet facecloth. Iwiped his face. Not even this got a reaction out of him. Iwas getting very worried.

Iwoke Mom up and told her there was something wrong with Chris. She also tried to wake him, but had no success either. Iphoned the Doctor in Waterval Boven. He must have heard the angst in my voice because he arrived within twenty minutes. He examined Chris and said "This man is dying". At firstIthought Ihad heard him wrong, then I thought maybe he has been to a party and doesn't know what he is saying, butIwas kidding myself, this was deadly serious.

He told me that ifI could get Chris to hospital in time he stood a chance. There was no time to wait for the ambulance, so between the Doctor and I, we managed to get

Chris into the back of the bakkie with Gary and Tim. Rory stayed behind to deal with the ambulance that the Doctor had already summoned. Idon't remember much of the journey to Nelspruit, but Mom said she had never been so scared. We made it to the Rob Ferreira Hospital in less than half an hour.

When we got to the hospital there were two Specialists waiting with a stretcher. The

Doctor had phoned to say we were on our way. They took Chris into the examining room and we sat for what felt like hours waiting for them to come and tell us what was wrong with Chris.

202 Eventually, the one Specialist came out and told me that Chris had had a massive brain haemorrhage. He said he knew miracles happened but I should pray that this one didn't.

If Chris lived, he would never know me or anyone else. He would be a vegetable. I couldn't accept this and prayed that everyone was totally mistaken and Chris would be totally well again. We sat with Chris through the rest of the night and at about eleven in the morning, the Sister came and said we should go home to have a rest and she would phone me if there was any change.

As we drove into Mom's gate, I could hear the phone ringing. I picked up the phone and I knew I should have stayed that last hour. Chris had passed away minutes before.

Why? Oh why? How could God be so cruel? Was there even a God. I was mad at God.

I was mad at Chris for leaving me. I had never felt so alone in my life. I got tired of people telling me I must be brave. I did not want to be brave. I wanted to curl up and die.

I was in such a state of shock, I couldn't even cry. I felt absolutely empty. I went into

Auto Pilot mode.

I knew I had to let Chris's Mom and Dad know but they didn't have a phone. I phoned his sister, Hannie, who also lived in Lydenburg, but there was no reply. I did get hold of

Andries who worked on the Exchange in Pongola, and he let the brothers know.

Then I drove to Lydenburg to tell Chris's Mom and Dad. It was the worst day of my life.

When I saw them, I finally broke down and cried. It was very hard, telling them. He was my husband, but he was their son. I returned to Airlie, but the next day it was back to

Lydenburg to make funeral arrangements. Chris's parents had asked me ifwe could bury him in Lydenburg. To me it didn't matter where we buried him, he would always be in my heart.

203 The children and Mom and Dad were devastated. None of us could believe that our vibrant, fun loving Chris was gone. Tim was the worst. He would not eat for days and had dreams of Chris coming through the window and telling him that everything would be alright.

We buried Chris on the 29th December 1979. I remember sitting in the church and thinking, I will wake up any minute now and it will all have been a bad dream. It took me a long, long time to come to grips with the fact that he was gone.

We went back home. It was a very subdued journey. After we dropped Uncle John off at the Old Age Home, the children and I went back to what felt like a very empty house.

We just sat and looked at each other.

I took the washing to the Laundrette. One of the maids came rushing out as soon as she recognized the car and wanted to know where the gentleman was. When I told her, she burst into tears. It was only then that I discovered how come my laundry was always so neatly folded. Chris would slip her a few rand and the money for the machines and pop off to the pub for a couple of beers. When he got back to the launderette, there was the washing all neatly done. Sneaky beggar.

I went back to work as I couldn't bear to be at home. My friends all came around to commiserate and I would end up consoling them. Chris was well and truly loved by all who knew him. CHAPTER 53

For months, every time someone told me something funny or important, I would think 'I must tell Chris' and reach for the phone, only to then realize, Chris was no more.

Chris's Boss was fantastic. When he came to sympathize he brought me Chris's last pay packet and Leave pay in cash as well as a cheque from the company's Widow and

Orphans Fund. He told me to let him know if there was anything more he could do. He was a great help in recommending a lawyer to wind up Chris's estate. Chris died intestate and it could have been a long drawn out process, but the lawyer had it all sorted out in a few months.

The boys and I moved into the new house on the 1st February 1980 and only then did I start to understand Chris's strange behaviour in the weeks before his death. Like his taking the boys out of boarding school and showing everyone the house. It was as if he knew he would never live in it and didn't want me to live in it alone.

I just couldn't settle back in my job at Illings, so I resigned and went to work for Darlene and Stafford as an Estate Agent. I think it did me the world of good as I was dealing with people who did not know my circumstances and treated me normally and without pity.

InApril, I took a break and went to Uitenhage to visit Penny and Ivan. P'etmy took leav c and she ancl I clnwe te Grahamste wfl theft a:l:en:g the Cea:>t to Por t Alfred for a few days,

·theft baek te Ui:tenfiage te get em-·.va:ihffig clElfle, llllfl tfteR eff agfriR ift the other direction. Vi-e W'eflt te Kaysna, thea up te Geerge, OucltsB:eem oocl the Caflge Caves.

205 We had a lot of fun, and a really in depth talk about the different directions our lives had taken us. We

206 ·····- ·· vioitr.l l At. Af rnHOP.llff'IO ..£1 P.flllff'.flP.•. That trip did me a world of good. Being with my

sister was very healing and when I got back, I was a different person and ready to climb the mountain once again. CHAPTER 35

Jurie unlocked the flat and I went straight to the bathroom to brush my teeth. He came into the bathroom and said quite casually "look what I have done". He ripped up his T shirt and as the fibres came out of the wound the blood gushed out like water out of a hosepipe. I then realized he had stabbed himself in the chest. Itwas horrible. He turned around and collapsed in the passage between the bathroom, bedroom and entrance hall.

I had to do something. I had to get help. I was so agitated. Frantically, I looked for the keys. I slipped and slid in the blood that was still pumping out of his body, but I could not find the keys. 'Oh please God, let me find them', I prayed. Indesperation I broke the burglar bars off the kitchen window. I will never know where I got the strength from. I woke Tim up and put him through the window and told him to bang on the neighbour's door and tell them to break our door down. He couldn't wake them up.

By this time I was covered in blood to my knees, still praying "Please God let me find the keys'. Then I found them on the coffee table behind the chairs and couch. Jurie must have tossed them over the couch. I don't know how I got there, but the next thing I was in the Police Station screaming 'call an ambulance and come quickly'. Seeing the state I was in and all the blood over my legs, the police got to the flat before I did. When they got there Jurie was still breathing, but by the time the ambulance arrived he was gone.

Tim must have woken his brothers after I left the flat and there were my three little boys, wide eyed, staring at the body. My poor, poor children, they didn't deserve this.

l '"ii>. ------·.

SYN O PSIS OF 'CLIMB EVERYMOUNTAIN.

The story is based on real events. It is about a woman who faced a lot of hurdles (mountains) in her life, the mistakes she made and how she overcame her problems which included being deceived, experiencing extreme poverty, a suicide and finally, after finding happiness the tragic loss, through death of a loved :one.

There are the antics of an errant husband, the demands of three children and interaction with colleagues, friends and family, a lover and the ever present Messenger of the Court. It covers a lot of South Africa because of circumstances that caused her family to move every few months. It is told with honesty, some humour and ends with the feeling that there should be more.

The Manuscript is written on a Word Program in double spacing. It is has 53 Chapters, 208 Pages and 253199 words.

AUTHOR BIOGRAPHY

We are two elderly sisters who are familiar with this story and decided that it should be told. We have never written or published anything before. We realize that this may have to be revised, but feel it is a compelling story, worth the telling.

We would dearly like an independent party to read the whole Manuscript and tell us if it has merit ot should be filed in File 13!

Our Contact information is: Heather Schoultz Pamela Paterson Cellphone: 0832598685 601 Torego Flats E-Mail: [email protected]:m. co. :za.. North Street Uitenhage 6229 Telephone No. 0419228849 Cellphone: 0792625661 E-Mail [email protected] Final Paragraph: That trip did me a world of good. Being with my sister was very healing and when I got back, I was a different person and ready to climb the mountain once agam.

CHAPTER 39

I had just got home from work one afternoon when there was a knock on the door.

Standing on the threshold was a tall fellow with quite a nice body and a towel wrapped

around his waist. His hair was wet and his green eyes were spitting fire, and he clutched

one of my sons in each hand! Ina not very friendly tone of voice, he demanded "Are

these yours?" The whole scene was so funny I nearly packed up laughing, but managed

to keep a straight face and acknowledge ownership of the two wriggling little tykes. He

told me he had been in the bath when there was a knock at the door, when he got to the

door there was no one there, Ithappened three times he said, emphasizing the three times,

before he caught them. He was so cross. I was thinking of Jean and my 'toktokkie'

escapades and asked him if he had ever been a kid. He let their hands go, adjusted his

towel and stomped off, clearly in a huff.

The boys asked me ifl was cross with them and I couldn't stop laughing. How could I

be? I was too amused replaying this comic scene.

With the company splitting into three departments, we had a major job sorting out the

accounts as to what expenses belonged to who, so we worked a lot of overtime.

The funfair was in Kempton Park on a Saturday that I had to work. I gave the children

each a bus ticket and I gave Gary some money for them to share for rides. I told them I

would come and pick them up after work.

They went off to Kempton Park and I went to work. When I got home at about four o'clock Rory and Tim were at home. They told me the funfair only opened at 6.00 p.m. so they came back. I asked them where Gary was and they thought he might be at one of his friends. I sent them to go and look for him.

I was standing on the balcony watching out for the boys' return, when the towel guy came out onto his balcony too. I said hello and asked him if he had perhaps seen Gary.

He said he had not, and we got chatting. He introduced himself as Chris, and said that after he had got over his humiliation of being seen so skimpily dressed in a towel, he saw the funny side of the kid's game. And yes, he had been a kid once too.

Rory and Tim came back and said they couldn't find Gary. I told Chris I had better go to

Kempton Park to try and find him otherwise I would have to report him missing. Chris said to give him five minutes to change and he would come with us. We got to the funfair and spotted Gary inrmediately. He said he had waited for the fun fair to open.

Chris gave the children some money for the rides and we left them there and went for a drink at the Kempton Park Hotel. A little later we picked the children up and went back to the flat where I invited him in for coffee.

Around that time I was going out with a fellow from Pretoria called Okkie. I had met him through my work colleague, Barbara. Okkie was a fun person to be with. He took me to the first live show I had seen, Ipi'tombi. I really enjoyed that. We went out for dinner and he seldom arrived without a gift of some sort. He was a buyer at a major firm and the gifts were probably ones he got from his suppliers. Mostly they were bottles of

Dimple Haig or Johnny Walker Black Label whiskey.

One night he took me out to dinner and when we got back to the flat, he asked me ifl didn't miss music. He had observed that I didn't have a radio or TV. I said of course I missed music, but I had got used to being without it. He told me ifl got a few records he would get me something to play them on. I said I did have a few records that I had collected in the Jurie era. He disappeared down to his car and came back with a record player which he connected and intwo two's we had music. He was the first man to really spoil me. CHAPTER 52

I was just dozing off when Chris started snoring. I nudged him to tum over. When he didn't, I poked him in the ribs, but he didn't budge, just kept on snoring. I couldn't believe it, so I went to get a cold wet facecloth. I wiped his face. Not even this got a reaction out of him. I was getting very worried.

I woke Mom up and told her there was something wrong with Chris. She also tried to wake him, but had no success either. I phoned the Doctor in Waterval Boven. He must have heard the angst in my voice because he arrived within twenty minutes. He examined

Chris and said "This man is dying". At first I thought I had heard him wrong, then I thought maybe he has been to a party and doesn't know what he is saying, but I was kidding myself, this was deadly serious.

He told me that ifl could get Chris to hospital in time he stood a chance. There was no time to wait for the ambulance, so between the Doctor and I, we managed to get Chris into the back of the bakkie with Gary and Tim. Rory stayed behind to deal with the ambulance that the Doctor had already summoned. I don't remember much of the journey to Nelspruit, but Mom said she had never been so scared. We made the eighty kilometers to the Rob Ferreira Hospital in less than half an hour.

When we got to the hospital there were two Specialists waiting with a stretcher. The

Doctor had phoned to say we were on our way. They took Chris into the examining room and we sat for what felt like hours waiting for them to come and tell us what was wrong with Chris. Eventually, the one Specialist came out and told me that Chris had had a massive brain haemorrhage. He said he knew miracles happened but I should pray that this one didn't.

If Chris lived, he would never know me or anyone else. He would be a vegetable. I couldn't accept this and prayed that everyone was totally mistaken and Chris would be totally well again. We sat with Chris through the rest of the night and at about eleven in the morning, the Sister came and said we should go home to have a rest and she would phone me if there was any change.

As we drove into Mom's gate, I could hear the phone ringing. I picked up the phone and I knew I should have stayed that last hour. Chris had passed away minutes before.

Why? Oh why? How could God be so cruel? Was there even a God. I was mad at

God. I was mad at Chris for leaving me. I had never felt so alone in my life. I got tired of people telling me I must be brave. Idid not want to be brave. Iwanted to curl up and die. I was in such a state of shock, I couldn't even cry. I felt absolutely empty. I went into Auto Pilot mode.

I knew I had to let Chris's Mom and Dad know but they didn't have a phone. I phoned his sister, Hannie, who also lived in Lydenburg, but there was no reply. Idid get hold of Andries who worked on the Exchange in Pongola, and he let the brothers know.

Then I drove to Lydenburg to tell Chris's Mom and Dad. Itwas the worst day of my life.

When I saw them, I finally broke down and cried. It was very hard, telling them. He was my husband, but he was their son. I returned to Airlie, but the next day it was back to Lydenburg to make funeral arrangements. Chris's parents had asked me if we could bury him in Lydenburg. To me it didn't matter where we buried him, he would always be in my heart. The children and Mom and Dad were devastated. None of us could believe that our vibrant, fun loving Chris was gone. Tim was the worst. He would not eat for days and had dreams of Chris coming through the window and telling him that everything would be alright.

We buried Chris on the 29th December 1979. I remember sitting in the church and thinking, I will wake up any minute now and it will all have been a bad dream. It took me a long, long time to come to grips with the fact that he was gone.

We went back home. It was a very subdued journey. After we dropped Uncle John off at the Old Age Home, the children and I went back to what felt like a very empty house.

We just sat and looked at each other.

I took the washing to the Laundrette. One of the maids came rushing out as soon as she recognized the car and wanted to know where the gentleman was. When I told her, she burst into tears. It was only then that I discovered how come my laundry was always so neatly folded. Chris would slip her a few rand and the money for the machines and pop off to the pub for a couple of beers. When he got back to the launderette, there was the washing all neatly done. What a sneaky beggar.

I went back to work as I couldn't bear to be at home. My friends all came around to commiserate and I would end up consoling them. Chris was well and truly loved by all who knew him.