First-Time Dads 6 Summer Math Games

$First-Time Dads 6 Summer Math Games$

June 2016 Manhattan FREE Family Where Every Child Matters

First-time dads 6 summer math games

Fighting the tampon tax

Tweens left home alone

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Features columns 6 First-time dads 24 FabuLYSS Finds Helping men adjust to a new addition to by Lyss Stern the family By Denise Yearian 25 Ask an Attorney By Alison Arden Besunder, Esq. 8 A good stepdad An important job that can be a challenge 28 Tips for Feeding Kids By Gayla Grace By Joanna DeVita 14 Is your tween ready to be 36 Healthy Living home alone? by Danielle Sullivan By Judy M. Miller 38 Just Write Mom 16 6 math projects that can by Danielle Sullivan make summer count Simple games keep kids’ minds sharp this calendar season 30 June Events By Dr. Heidi Smith Luedtke 36 18 Seeing red over the special sections tampon tax These New Yorkers led the fight against a 10 Special Needs Directory discriminatory sales tax 20 Choices for Family Health By Tammy Scileppi 37 The Marketplace 22 City museums lay out welcome mat Museum Mile Festival offers a fresh look at some classic institutions By Shnieka L. Johnson 26 The fury inside Learning to master your anger before it destroys you 38 By Carolyn Waterbury-Tieman

June 2016 • Manhattan Family 3 letter from the publisher The perfect month of June had a great Moth- will always be linked. They were always working and were that went unaddressed in years past. er’s Day and hope Maybe some of the roles seldom home. Sad, but true. We all know that not everything I you all did, too. My will have reversed a bit The reality of extended families comes naturally and that there is family was on vacation and now they may be has also changed the picture and we information we need to help us do a and that in itself made helping you in ways you now have step-dad and mom realities better job. it a super day, but in used to help them. as well. Families are complex and no We hope you find this issue in- addition to that, my June is a month that longer hidden behind the curtains formative and entertaining too! Our daughter was loving presents parents of and kept in the shadows. When I was calendar is loaded with great things and sweet in delightful kids of all ages with a nine years old my dad remarried my for every family to do around New ways and made me feel myriad of celebrations girlfriend’s mother and we became York in this glorious month of June, special. and milestones; every- an instant new family. There were which also happens to be my birth- Last month we ran an interesting thing from graduations to weddings, loads of issues associated with this day month. No wonder I love it. Have article about parenting grown chil- the beginning of camp to the begin- that went unaddressed for years. In fun! Happy summer. dren, and I personally found it had ning of summer school. It’s also the those days, people were very insu- substance I could relate to. Just be- month when we celebrate fathers, lar. They didn’t talk about things and Thanks for reading! cause they’re taller than you doesn’t and this issue has it’s share of ar- they certainly didn’t entertain things really change the parental respon- ticles relating to Dad. With increas- like counseling. Nowadays, it’s a rare sibility, it just makes the responsi- ing numbers of fathers opting to family who would respond with such bilities different. It means that new be primary caregivers rather than denial to the complexities of life’s issues will emerge, like dealing with working outside the home, the role choices. boyfriends or girlfriends or in-laws. of Dad has altered and has become We’re so much wiser and more Susan Weiss-Voskidis, It means that although they will be inclusive. When I was a kid, many open and just having these parent- Publisher/Excutive Editor independent beings, somehow they of my friends hardly saw their dads. ing resources available helps in ways [email protected]

Community News Group Contact information ceo: Les Goodstein advertising: Web or Print address President & Publisher: Jennifer Goodstein (718) 260-4554 New York Parenting Media/CNG [email protected] 1 Metrotech Center North 10th Floor New York parenting circulation Brooklyn, NY 11201 (718) 260-8336 Publisher / executive editor: [email protected] Susan Weiss Publisher / business Manager: editorial www.NYParenting.com Clifford Luster (718) 260-4554 [email protected] oPerations associate: Tina Felicetti calendar sales rePs: Alexis Benson, Erin Brof, (718) 260-2523 Jay Pelc, Stephanie Stellacio, Shanika Stewart art director: Leah Mitch Web designer: Sylvan Migdal The acceptance of advertising by New York Parent- New York Parenting has been recognized for ing does not constitute an endorsement of the editorial and design excellence by PMA. graPhic designers: Arthur Arutyunov, products, services or information being advertised. New York Parenting is published monthly by New Daria Avvento, Gardy Charles, Yvonne Farley, We do not knowingly present any products or ser- York Parenting Media/CNG. Subscription rate is Earl Ferrer, John Napoli vices that are fraudu lent or misleading in nature. $35 annually. Reproduction of New York Parent- Editorial inquiries, calendar information, advertising ing Media in whole or part without written per- rates and schedules and subscription requests may be mission from the publisher is prohibited. All rights Managing editor: Vince DiMiceli addressed to New York Parenting, One Metro tech reserved. Copyright©2016 Readership: 185,000. Center North, 10th Floor, Brooklyn, N.Y. 11201. 2015 circulation audits by CVC. assistant editor: Courtney Donahue New York Parenting can also be reached by calling coPy editors: Lisa J. Curtis, (718) 260-4554, emailing [email protected] or Shavana Abruzzo by visiting our website, NYParenting.com. calendar editor: Joanna Del Buono Join the conversation on Facebook. 4 Manhattan Family • June 2016 SUMMER AT ST. BRIGID SCHOOL A Catholic, Elementary School SIXTH STREET Educating Students PreK 2 to 8th Grade summer Program for youth ages 8–13 Arts • Creative Writing SPRING OPeN HOuSe Urban Gardening Cooking • DIY Crafting RegisteR today! Limited SeatS! 638 e 6th Street • www.sixthstreetcenter.org [email protected] COMMUNITY CENTER 212-677-1863 •

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June 2016 • Manhattan Family 5 First-time dads Helping men By Denise yearian hen a child is born, adjust to a much emphasis is W placed on helping the new mother and baby adjust. new addition But they aren’t the only ones un- dergoing change. Most first-time fathers experience stress due to sleep to the family deprivation, change in routines, and their own apprehensions about parenting. “There are a myriad of emotions that come with being a new father,” says Armin Brott, author of multiple books and one DVD on fatherhood. “Most often, it’s a feeling of pride and excitement. At the same time there can be apprehensions — ‘Will I be a good father?’ ‘Can we afford this?’ ‘How is this going to change our lives?’ ” This was what David Wuttke found. “When my son David Jr. was born, I had overwhelming feelings of anxiety and excitement all at once,” he says. “I had been babysitting since I was 16, so my anxiety wasn’t about child care. It was the reality of the responsibility that this was my son. And that sent a shock to my system.” dirty work. But it shouldn’t be that careful you aren’t overly critical. Just knowing there’s another per- way.” Standing behind your husband and son to care for can be a big stressor Susan Maroto, licensed social correcting his every move will only for first-time fathers. Couple that worker and parent educator in pre- frustrate him. Show him what needs with the fact that many men don’t natal care and postpartum adjust- to be done, then let him develop his initially know how to bond with ment, agrees. own style.” their newborns. “There are things moms can do Fortunately for Wuttke, basic “If a mother is nursing, it natu- to help dads feel competent in that training occurred as a teen sitter rally brings her in contact with the role,” she says. “Encourage them and paid big dividends when his baby,” says Brott. “Dads don’t have to take part in all areas of child son was born. Soon after his wife that same natural bonding method, care — feeding, bathing, reading, Christine delivered, she enrolled in so they often get stuck doing the and putting the baby down. Just be college and David was thrust into

6 Manhattan Family • June 2016 Resources for new fathers Books and DVDs: • “Be Prepared: A Practical Handbook for New Dads” by Gary Greenberg and Jeannie Hayden • “The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips, and Advice for Dads-to-Be” by Armin Brott • “The Father’s Almanac: From Pregnancy to Pre-school, Baby Care to Behavior, the Complete and Indispensable Book of Practi- cal Advice and Ideas for Every Man Discovering the Fun and Chal- lenge of Fatherhood” by S. Adams Sullivan • “ N e w Father Book: What Every New Father Needs to Know to be a Good Dad” by Wade F. Horn, Ph.D. and Jeffrey Rosenberg, MSW • “Toolbox for New Dads: Because Babies Don’t Come with In- structions” by Armin Brott (DVD)

Websites: • www.newdads.com • www.mrdad.com solo evening child care. One concern most new fa- “I never had to think about thers share is fatigue. Franco and how to take care of David. I just Wuttke both had a hard time with fell back on my babysitting days,” this. says Wuttke. “If he was crying, I “The one thing I really didn’t would say, ‘Okay, let’s guess what expect was that time on a 24-hour he needs?’ Then I’d check his dia- clock had no meaning anymore,” per. If that was okay, I’d try to feed says Franco. “It became irrelevant him. If he wasn’t hungry, I thought after a while, and we just fit sleep maybe he had gas or needed to in whenever we could.” sleep. One of those usually did The Wuttkes solved this prob- the trick.” lem by enlisting the help of rela- For Anthony Franco, the ad- tives. justment wasn’t that easy. When “There were times Chris and I his wife Lisa gave birth to twins, said, ‘We need a break,’ and my Franco seemed to be fine. But four mom would take David, so we months into it, things changed. could rest. We even called my “I started experiencing panic grandparents, so we could have attacks and didn’t know why,” he an occasional night out.” remembers. “I would be in the su- Extended family and friends permarket when all of the sudden can be a huge help or add signifi- I would get this overwhelming cant stress, depending upon the sense of dread and lightheaded- dynamic of the relationship, say ness.” experts. This is where husbands This went on for several can help their wives by setting months until Franco finally went boundaries. to the doctor. “Dad should take the role of “He asked me where it was hap- communicator outside the fam- pening, and I told him it was when ily, and if needed, limit visitors,” I was buying diapers, formula, says Maroto. “Encourage others and other things for the twins,” he to help in practical ways such as continues. “That’s when he pin- dropping off meals, running er- pointed the problem. He said this rands, or watching the baby for 20 happens to a lot of new fathers. minutes, so the couple can take a He prescribed a little anti-anxiety quick walk.” medication and then I was fine.” What’s most important is to Brott believes it’s important for realize this is a period of adjust- men to have someone with whom ment and life does get easier. they can share their stress. “It’s like anything new, it takes “Some men have close friends a little time,” says Franco. “It took they can confide in. But a lot about 18 months before I became don’t, so they keep all of those completely comfortable with the concerns in and the stress level twins. Now we’re pretty much in- builds,” he says. “They shouldn’t separable.” be afraid to talk with other men Denise Yearian is the former edi- and find out what they have gone tor of two parenting magazines and through. Chances are they’ll find the mother of three children and four others felt the same way, too.” grandchildren.

June 2016 • Manhattan Family 7 A good stepdad

BY GAYLA GRACE During our second year of mar- journey after graduating from college. An important riage, Randy left the house one eve- She left in early summer, and we knew y husband, Randy, will be ning and called from a nearby hotel. it would be difficult to communicate job that can the first to tell you he has “I’m not coming home tonight. I’m with her while she was gone. As I M done a lot of things wrong not sure I’m coming home again. I suspected, however, she made sure to as a stepfather. He has been a step- can’t cope with the ongoing conflict call on Father’s Day, despite the seven- be a real parent to my two daughters for 20 between me and you and the kids.” hour time difference between us. years. His stepdaughters love him It was a tough season. Randy When Randy answered the phone, challenge dearly. brought two children to the mar- I saw tears in his eyes as he listened But it hasn’t always been that way. riage also, and attempting to blend to Jamie recount life-changing expe- My youngest daughter, Jodi, was our four kids, ages 3 to 10, while riences, knowing he had contributed almost 3 when we married, and my learning how to stepparent and par- to her stability and maturity that en- older daughter Jamie was 5. Randy ent together, proved harder than we abled her young life to now make a had a difficult time with Jamie from anticipated. But neither of us wanted difference for others. She closed with the beginning. She didn’t want an- to endure another divorce. Randy the words every stepfather loves to other dad in her life, and she made and I began counseling that year to hear, “Happy Father’s Day, Dad. I love that clear to him. work through the bumps. you. I miss you.” He overheard a conversation be- During her teenage years, Jamie Do you have to be a perfect step- tween the two girls one night in the challenged us on every turn. If Randy dad to have a meaningful relationship bathtub during our first year of mar- punished her in the slightest, she with your stepchildren? No! riage. threatened to call Child Protective Randy’s stepdaughters, Jodi, now “I hate him, too. I can’t believe Mom Services. She ran away more times 23, and Jamie, now 25, love their im- married him,” Jamie told Jodi. There than I can remember (but thankfully perfect stepdad. was little love, or even like, between never went far). After one particu- Why? How did that happen? Randy and the girls in the beginning. larly difficult day with defiant behav- Randy never quit. He got up when ior, Randy took Jamie’s cellphone and he fell down. He sought help when he threw it to the ground. As it busted needed answers. He cried. He prayed. into several pieces, Jamie began yell- He struggled. He fought. He apolo- ing at us both. The night didn’t end gized. He forgave. He smiled with grit- well. And I wasn’t sure the sun would ted teeth. But he never quit. come up the next day. Is it a cycle? Yes. You take one step But it did. And Randy didn’t give forward and two steps backward. up on his stepparenting journey with You celebrate a season of growth and Jamie. then start a season of despair. You When she came into driving age, gain the insider status one day and Randy wanted to teach her to drive. feel like an outcast the next. She tested every ounce of his pa- Does that mean you failed? tience. They would come in from a No. driving session hardly talking to one Stepparenting is tough. Mistakes another — Jamie’s anger brewing are made. Misunderstandings hap- over. But the next day, they were at pen. And variables outside our con- it again. trol influence stepfamily relation- During her high school years, ships. But there are new tomorrows. Jamie participated in competitive A fresh start to work through differ- cheerleading. Randy would jok- ences. Hope for harmony. ingly say, “Do you call cheerlead- As a stepdad, you’ve been given ing a sport?” The ongoing drama an opportunity to influence a young with other cheerleaders, out-of-town child’s life like no one else can. In an competitions, and the continuous imperfect way. drain on his wallet threw Randy into Are you up for the challenge? I stress overdrive. His grumpiness hope so. overshadowed his joy at times. But Because my husband will tell you: he didn’t quit supporting Jamie and your efforts count! And there are re- the things that made her tick. wards to stepparenting, even when As Jamie left for college, I’ll never you’re not perfect … but oftentimes forget her words to him. With a wrap- they’re at the end of the journey. around hug and a smile on her face Gayla Grace is a freelance writer, she said, “Thank you for being such a wife, mom to three and stepmom to two. great dad to me. I love you!” She supports and encourages steppar- Jamie travelled to Mozambique, Af- ents through her website at www.step- rica, for an eight-month missionary parentingwithgrace.com.

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June 2016 • Manhattan Family 9 Special Needs We Can’t Wait to Hear What Your Child Has to Say! Directory Social skills are growing at Chatty Child. Chatty Child Speech & school levels. Occupational Therapy, Students are initially assessed by PLLC their director, Dr. Levy, who creates an individualized instructional 325 Broadway, #403, NYC 10013 plan for each student. Sessions 347-491-4451 can be held at the home or at www.chattychild.com EBL Coaching’s learning center. A personalized therapeutic center Specialized tutorial programs for stu- in downtown Manhattan, providing dents with dyslexia and learning dis- comprehensive speech-language abilities are available. Dr. Emily Levy, and occupational therapy services, Director EBL Coaching. ST and OT evaluations, individual sessions, and/or group sessions. Accepting DOE-RSA’s, early inter- EBS Therapy of vention and private pay with coded New York invoices for out of network reim- 718-238-0377 bursement. Our SLP’s specialize www.ebstherapy.com in treating children with speech, EBS is the global leader in birth to language, and articulation delays, as 21 year-old programs and the largest well as children with autism, audi- provider of services to the pediatric tory processing difficulties, fluency population. EBS has an unparalleled concerns, and/or difficulties social- commitment to providing the high- Watch Confidence Blossom! izing with peers. est quality services, training, mem- Offering PROMPT services for chil- bership and support. Does your child need extra support? dren who have been diagnosed with Through our family of services we Boost academic, social and verbal skills to childhood apraxia of speech, as well are positively impacting the lives of as feeding therapy for children with children. EBS therapy of New York improve school success. oral-motor and feeding delays. Our is a multi-disciplinary team of highly- occupational therapists specialize trained specialists with a passion for Chatty Child offers: in treating children with fine motor O Individual & group treatment for speech-language therapy working to help children and adults delays, sensory processing deficits, move, communicate, and learn to O Individual & group treatment for occupational therapy and hand writing concerns. O Socialization groups their greatest potential. Come take a tour of Chatty Child O Specialized handwriting instruction Our clinic is located in Brooklyn, and experience the personalized, O Feeding and oral motor therapy New York, but our services reach far professional, and caring service we O beyond – into schools, homes and Sensory Integration therapy provide in a fun and engaging state O the communities throughout the five PROMPT therapy for apraxia of speech of the art clinic. O Academic preparation boroughs. We work with families to determine the best and most effec- For Speech Therapy and Occupational Therapy, we accept: EBL Coaching tive places and times to meet the O Department of Education Related Service Agreements (RSAs) 17 East 89th street unique needs of each child. O Early Intervention 212-249-0147 Our mission is to make a difference O Private pay with fully coded invoices for insurance reimbursement. www.eblcoaching.com within the community by helping our At Chatty Child, our therapists provide quality care that is nurturing, EBL Coaching offers one-one-one clients achieve success in communi- innovative and creative. We work with the family to provide each tutoring for students in grades pre-k cation, learning and movement. child with a comprehensive treatment plan, while taking into to 12 with special education learning account each child’s interests, strengths and goals. We are here needs. Gillen Brewer School to help your child reach his or her fullest potential. They used research-based, multi- 410 East 92nd Street, Chatty Child’s state-of-the-art therapy center for children is sensory strategies, including the Manhattan 10128 conveniently located in lower Manhattan. Please come in for a tour Orton Gillingham technique, to 212-831-3667 to discover what we can offer your child and become a part of the develop reading, writing, reading www.gillenbrewer.com Chatty Child family! comprehension, math, organization Founded in 1992, one of the few and study skills. schools in New York City dedicated To register, or schedule a tour, They also offer three-week intensive to transforming the lives of young private consultation or evaluation, academic summer programs at the children with a wide variety of lan- email [email protected], elementary and middle school/high Continued on page 12 call 347.491.4451, or visit www.chattychild.com. 325 Broadway - Suite 403 To advertise with us, New York, New York 10007 please call 718-260-2587

10 Manhattan Family • June 2016 Special Advertising Section Uncovering the Specialness in Every Child™

Founded in 1992, The Gillen Brewer School is a New York State-approved school, recognized for providing a family- oriented, early childhood program for children ages 2.8 to 10 years with language-based and non-verbal learning disabilities. We offer a 12-month program that provides developmentally appropriate academic instruction, speech and language therapy, occupational therapy, play therapy and counseling, music, art, science, technology, sports and physical fitness. Our program has continued to grow with the addition of our 4:1:2 class, a specialized class with a higher ratio of teaching staff to students. Learning and growing in a secure and nurturing environment, our students develop the skills necessary to overcome challenges. We work closely with their families to instill self- confidence and build a strong foundation for lifelong independence. d,'/>>EZtZ^,KK> ϰϭϬĂƐƚϵϮŶĚ^ƚƌĞĞƚEĞǁzŽƌŬ͕EzϭϬϭϮϴ ŽŶƚĂĐƚ:ŽĞ^ƵƌĂŬ͕ŝƌĞĐƚŽƌŽĨĚŵŝƐƐŝŽŶƐ͕ĂƚϮϭϮͲϴϯϭͲϯϲϲϳŽƌũŽĞΛŐŝůůĞŶďƌĞǁĞƌ͘ĐŽŵ >ĞĂƌŶŵŽƌĞĂďŽƵƚƵƐĂƚǁǁǁ͘ŐŝůůĞŶďƌĞǁĞƌ͘ĐŽŵ

Special Advertising Section June 2016 • Manhattan Family 11 Help Your Special Needs Directory Child SOAR Continued from page 10 Pace University OASIS guage, emotional, developmental, Program learning and disabilities. The school Dyslexia/ADHD tutoring specializes in educating children with 163 William Street, 10th Floor, challenging, and often multiple dis- NYC 10038 abilities including language-based 212-346-1088 3 Week and non-verbal learning disabilities. www.pace.edu/oasis The Ongoing Academic and Social Gillen Brewer is one of the only Intensive Instructional Support (OASIS) pro- schools that works with children gram at Pace offers one of the most beginning at the pre-school level Summer Programs comprehensive college support who have multiple disabilities. programs for students with learning Embodying a comprehensive and In differences. thoughtful approach that sets the Reading, Writing, school apart, it employs a rigorous The program helps prepare stu- twelve-month curriculum that fol- dents with for community integra- & Math lows the New York State learning tion, employment, and adult life. standards, while adhering to an Designed for students with Asperger individual learning program that syndrome, autism spectrum disor- meets the educational needs of each ders, learning disabilities, nonverbal student. learning differences, and related The Pre-School Program serves chil- challenges graduate with a bach- dren from just under 3 to 5 years old elor’s degree in any field of study. and the School-Age Program serves With the continuous help and sup- children 5-10 who are classified as port provided from the OASIS team, either learning disabled, emotionally anything is achievable. For more disturbed or speech impaired, with a information, please call (212) 346- particular set of distinguishing factors. 1088. Visit us on Facebook.

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Special Advertising Section June 2016 • Manhattan Family 13 Is your tween ready to be home alone? By Judy M. Miller an option. But, how do you know if making good choices without your your child is ready? input. He adheres to the guidelines eed to run a few errands? The following points will help you have set in place about hav- Get out of the house for a you determine if your child is ing a friend over, watching TV or N while for some mental health equipped to do so: a movie, playing video games, and time or exercise? time spent outdoors. Around the time your child Your tween indicates reaches the pre-tween (tween) he wants to stay Your tween is reliable years, staying home alone may be home alone and self-sufficient Your child is seeking more inde- Daily chores are done with little pendence and has asked you to leave to no reminders. Your child can Further resources use their own discretion. him by himself. He is not anxious safely prepare simple snacks when for parents Few states in the U.S. have reg- when you are gone and he can keep he is hungry. He knows how to Safekids (www.safekids.org/fre- ulations regarding the age a child himself occupied safely. properly use the microwave and quently-asked-questions) recom- must be before he or she can be toaster. You can rely on him to use mends that all children reach the legally left home alone. Latchkey- Your tween follows your only the appliances you’ve agreed age of 12 before being left alone at Kids (www.latchkey-kids.com/ directions and rules to let him use. home, but the organization also latchkey-kids-age-limits.htm) pro- Your child has shown you that recognizes that every child is dif- vides this information and links he can follow your expectations, Your tween uses the ferent and encourages parents to to all states. even when you are not present. phone properly You’ve witnessed your child Your child answers the phone

14 Manhattan Family • June 2016 Ask yourself… MOUNT VERNON HOTEL Parents should know the answers to before making the decision to leave their tweens at home alone: MUSEUM & GARDEN Is your neighborhood a safe one? Do you have neighbors that st your child knows and trusts, people he can turn to if he needs 421 East 61 Street help? www.mvhm.org Is your child truthful with you? Does he regularly confide in you? Does he share his concerns and problems with you? 212-838-6878 • [email protected] Does your child demonstrate good decision-making and judgment? Does you child understand basic safety procedures? History Weeks 2016 Will he make the decision of safety first? July 11 - 15, Ages 9 – 12 • July 18 - 22, Ages 6 – 8 Can your child tell time? Can he calmly provide your home phone number and address and give directions to your house in Explore life in 19th-century New York City via historic crafts case of emergency? and games, behind-the-scenes tours, old-fashioned cooking, Does you child know your cellphone number? Be sure he scavenger hunts and more! knows this, 911, and any other emergency numbers. Can your child lock and unlock your windows and doors? Does your child know the garage door code or alarm system “We are a Reading in Preschool family. We hired them since my code and password, if this applies? daughter was reading ready but not overly interested in books. In all honesty, Does you child stay calm when the unexpected happens? I saw her interest in reading immediately increase after the ﬁ rst lesson. Can he stop and think rationally before letting his emotions 6 sessions later my daughter is reading simple words where ever she goes. overcome him? Bottom line, if you want money well spent buy this class.” Have you made “dry runs” with your child, allowing him — Valoree H. - UWS to practice being home alone? This will give both of you confi- Now Booking Summer Classes! Over the summer break, most students lose 2 months of what they learned dence in your tween’s ability to stay home alone. in the winter/spring months. Help your child stay conﬁ dent and ahead of the game! Do you have more than one child you will leave home alone? Can they resolve their conflicts without physical alterca- Readingin in tions and adult intervention? Preschool ReadinginPreschool.com appropriately. He recognizes why contacts and numbers. (In our 917-723-1159 it is all right to fib in this instance home a brightly binder labeled [email protected] | [email protected] — when you are away from the EMERGENCY, with our address house — saying you are unavail- and home phone number below, it able, and how to take a message holds contacts, emergency num- correctly. bers, and basic first-aid procedures. This binder remains by Is your tween ready to be Your tween the kitchen phone and comes understands safety in handy for any babysitter we He is familiar with basic first- hire.) aid and knows what to do in case Begin slowly, leaving him alone of a fire or other emergency. He for five to 10 minutes the first few knows to call 911 and other emer- times and build from there. Digital gency numbers if necessary. He knows what he can and can- What else can you do not do when you are not at home. to help your tween? home alone? He understands that knives can- Give him something to do to By Judy M. Miller an option. But, how do you know if making good choices without your not be used without your super- structure his time. This helps your child is ready? input. He adheres to the guidelines vision. He knows not to open alone time pass quickly. eed to run a few errands? The following points will help you have set in place about hav- the door while you are gone and Check in with your tween while CAMP Get out of the house for a you determine if your child is ing a friend over, watching TV or what neighbors to call or go to you are gone. N while for some mental health equipped to do so: a movie, playing video games, and if he needs help. He knows the Call to see if he is comfortable, time or exercise? time spent outdoors. “safe” meeting spot, to find you has any questions, and also to Around the time your child Your tween indicates or be found, in case anything keep him updated on when you reaches the pre-tween (tween) he wants to stay Your tween is reliable should happen. He knows where will arrive back home. years, staying home alone may be home alone and self-sufficient the flashlights and extra batter- This is an exciting time for GUIDE Your child is seeking more inde- Daily chores are done with little ies are. your tween as he establishes pendence and has asked you to leave to no reminders. Your child can Although your child may know more independence, with your Further resources use their own discretion. him by himself. He is not anxious safely prepare simple snacks when the emergency numbers, keep a confidence that he will do well. for parents Few states in the U.S. have reg- when you are gone and he can keep he is hungry. He knows how to list of emergency contacts and Safekids (www.safekids.org/fre- ulations regarding the age a child himself occupied safely. properly use the microwave and numbers in an easy-to-view place. Judy M. Miller, a mother of four, is quently-asked-questions) recom- must be before he or she can be toaster. You can rely on him to use Make sure all of your numbers training her tween son on how to be mends that all children reach the legally left home alone. Latchkey- Your tween follows your only the appliances you’ve agreed are there as well. When panic safely home alone. She is a certified age of 12 before being left alone at Kids (www.latchkey-kids.com/ directions and rules to let him use. or worry sets in, the brain can Gottman-Institute Educator and the au- home, but the organization also latchkey-kids-age-limits.htm) pro- Your child has shown you that flood and we struggle to remem- thor of “What To Expect From Your recognizes that every child is dif- vides this information and links he can follow your expectations, Your tween uses the ber what we do know. Adopted Tween” and “Writing to Heal ferent and encourages parents to to all states. even when you are not present. phone properly Have a simple chart of first Adoption Grief: Making Connections & Check it out on nyparenting.com You’ve witnessed your child Your child answers the phone aid tips close to the emergency Moving Forward.”

June 2016 • Manhattan Family 15 math projects that can make summer count

By Dr. HeiDi SmitH LueDtke Let kids sort and display their remember and apply measurement Simple games finds. Your child might organize concepts when they’re solving word 6 azy summer days give kids a objects from smallest to largest or problems at school or cooking up keep kids’ chance to unwind, but time out group them by texture or color. Se- fun in the kitchen. L of school causes kids to forget quencing skills take off in toddler- academics. The National Summer hood, and kids love arranging and . Fish out of water minds sharp Learning Association reports stu- rearranging special objects. 4 Cut out and decorate paper fish dents lose an average of two months’ or use goldfish-shaped snack crack- this season worth of learning during summer . Sink or swim? ers as game pieces. You’ll need 20 break, and math concepts take the 2 Collect a box of water-safe ob- fish for each player. hardest hit. Losses are greatest for jects from around the house, such Give each child a clear glass bowl kids who are already struggling. as apples, eggs, pennies, hollow and or print a game board from www. The good news? Fun, at-home solid toy balls, Matchbox cars, and mathwire.com/games/fishoutofwa- math projects using inexpensive seashells. Use a large bucket of water ter.pdf. Each player rolls a single supplies can prevent summer learn- or a backyard kiddie pool to ex- die on each turn. The number rolled ing loss — and you don’t have to be periment. Ask budding scientists to tells the child how many fish to re- a mathematical genius to supervise guess whether each object will sink turn to the water and the first player them. Let these easy ideas inspire or stay afloat. Record their predic- to get all his fish back in the water you: tions and the observed results in a wins the game. simple chart to capture their learn- Make this more challenging by re- Age group: Preschool ing. quiring players to get the exact num- . Scavenger hunt Take care to keep electronics and ber of fish remaining on their final 1 Take a hike with your child and books out of reach, though. Your pre- roll (if they have only three fish left, collect a variety of items like pine- schooler may plop your cellphone they must roll a 3 to win). Ask the cones and leaves, rocks, sticks, and into the pool and yell “sink!” before winner to count his fish for confirma- feathers. you can rush to the rescue. tion, so you’re sure the winner didn’t “Preschoolers learn best when nibble her way to victory. they explore natural materials with Age group: Kindergarten their senses,” says Master of Edu- to third grade Age group: Fourth cation Lorayne Carbon, Director of . measure up to sixth grade the Early Childhood Center at Sarah 3 Teach and reinforce measure- . Balloon rocket car race Lawrence College in Bronxville, N.Y. ment concepts including cups, pints, 5 Put engineering skills to work quarts, and gallons at the water table with some materials gleaned from or in the sandbox. Provide a collec- the recycling bin. You’ll need plas- Let them sell lemonade! tion of measuring utensils of varied tic water or soda bottles and lids, Measuring ingredients, making change, and shapes and sizes and let kids explore drinking straws, wooden skewers, counting the profits all reinforce math learning. how many cups are in a pint and balloons, and duct tape to make Stock kids’ cash box — an empty drawer how many pints are in a gallon. these cool rocket cars. Find detailed organizer or egg carton provides separate See whether tall, skinny vessels instructions and a video demon- compartments for each kind of coin — with hold more than short, fat ones. stration at www.hometrainingtools. pennies, nickels, dimes, and quarters. When kids’ interest wanes, com/a/balloon-rocket-car-project. At the end of the sale, kids can head back inside and show them Give kids enough materials to count and roll their coins to take how to build a measurement man make several cars, using different to the bank or make life a little out of colored paper. Find detailed sized balloons and smaller or larger sweeter by donating profits to a directions at www.mathwire.com/ sized nozzles. Let them test how far local charity. measurement/measurementman. their cars go on a flat surface like pdf. Visualization helps students the driveway or sidewalk, using a

16 Manhattan Family • June 2016 Math resources for all ages Need a few more ideas for summer math projects? • Online practice for basic math facts: https://www.xtra- math.org • Help kids change the way they solve math problems: “The Grapes of Math” (Scho- lastic, 2004) by Greg Tang takes a novel, humorous approach. (Second grade and up.) • L o a d s of ideas and online games to keep math skills sharp, organized by grade level and topic: http://every- daymath.uchicago.edu.

tape measure and chalk to mark dis- tances. Record results on a spread- sheet and have kids calculate the shortest and longest trials, the average length traveled, and the time it takes rocket cars to travel a set distance (kids need a stop watch and some help to do this). Go all out and host a neighborhood rocket car derby with prizes for best design and distance.

. Million-dollar spending spree 6 Give each kid a pretend bank balance of $1,000,000 and challenge her to spend it in a specific period of time. Kids might finance a dream vacation, build or buy a new home, or create a financial plan to address an important social issue. Set spending rules that make this project fun and challenging for your child. You might require kids to donate 10 percent to a church or charity, or set aside a certain percentage for college education costs. See teacher’s ideas at www. proteacher.net (search for million- dollar spending spree). Post the rules and put kids to work. By the end of the project period, each child should produce an itemized spending plan with a photo of each item and an expense tally. The million-dollar spending spree gets kids excited about research and engaged with numbers. It also facilitates great family con- versations about values and decision making. Dr. Heidi Smith Luedtke is a psycholo- #2: Sink or swim? gist, former math teacher, and mom of two. She is the author of “Detachment Parenting.”

June 2016 • Manhattan Family 17 Seeing red over the tampon tax These New By Tammy Scileppi he end of the “tampon tax” Yorkers led the is near. T A bill that would end sales fight against a tax on tampons and sanitary pads was approved by the state legisla- discriminatory ture in late May, and is expected to be signed into law by Gov. Andrew Cuomo. sales tax And it all happened thanks to a lawsuit filed by five Manhattanites that claimed the four-percent tax collected by the state Department of Taxation and Finance on the the products — which are not considered medical items under state law — “violates the Equal Protection Clauses of the United States and New York Constitutions.” Margo Seibert, Jennifer Moore, Catherine O’Neil, Natalie Brasington, and Taja-Nia Henderson saw no reason why women should be paying the extra for the right to use these basic necessities. New York is one of 40 states that Manhattanites, from left, Catherine O’Neil, Margo Seibert, and Natalie Brasington levies a sales tax on pads and tam- filed a Class Action suit against the taxation of feminine hygiene products related to pons. menstruation in New York state. More New Yorkers are finding it harder to afford the basics in the O’Neill noted. woman buying those products has city, especially parents on a bud- These products have always been been spending about $70 a year for get. And for low-income women, or taxed and for some reason, catego- 35 years, according to the court pa- women living in poverty, it’s much rized as “general merchandise,” or pers. That seems totally unfair con- tougher. Sometimes, these women surprisingly, “luxury items” that the sidering that this extra money can can’t even afford tampons and sani- state can make revenue off of, ac- be used for something else, like food tary napkins, which the Electronic cording to the Department of Taxa- or gas, say the advocates fighting to Benefit Transfer card (food stamps) tion and Finance and its commis- end the tax. doesn’t cover. Advocates say these sioner Jerry Boone. CNN Money women are the ones that are particu- states that the state makes about $14 Freedom from shame larly hard-hit by the tax. million per year from sales of tam- Plaintiff Margo Seibert believes “The struggle of low-income pons and sanitary pads. that all women deserve “a shame- women and sanitary products is a Items that are considered a medi- free relationship to their periods, harsh reality. Additionally, students cal necessity, like adult diapers, and regardless of socioeconomic circum- from low-income families cannot incontinence pads, foot powder, dan- stances.” She and Caroline Angell are always rely on schools to provide druff shampoo, Chapstick, and facial two ladies on a mission: They aim to them with tampons. This poses a wash are not taxed, but medical items expose and eliminate menstrual ta- serious potential risk to both the used only by women — tampons boos, and advocate for equal access mental and physical health of young and sanitary pads (which the Food to feminine hygiene products. people in a school environment, who and Drug Administration considers a Seibert, an artist and working cannot otherwise access feminine medical necessity) — have been. actor, co-founded Racket in 2015, care products,” plaintiff Catherine This means that the average an organization dedicated to provid-

18 Manhattan Family • June 2016 ing low-income and homeless indi- stance, it just isn’t right or fair viduals who menstruate with the that they pay a tax on something products they need, while working as necessary as tampons, while to combat “period shame.” rich men can buy Rogaine, tax- Are you a mom “The formation of Racket was in- free. Women shouldn’t be taxed for spired by my (and my co-founder’s) being women,” she said. volunteer work with the homeless who wants to and the shock at hearing just how Tampon refund? difficult the homeless period truly “We’re thrilled to see that our is — shelters are often unable to lawsuit helped bring this issue make money? provide these products, and they to the forefront of the legislative are cost prohibitive,” she noted. agenda. We look forward to the end “To top it all off, I then heard about of this discriminatory tax in New the tampon tax through my friend York once and for all. Our case also and menstrual equality activist, seeks a refund for the millions of Jennifer Weiss-Wolf, and it lit a fire women who have had to pay this il- within me. legal tax,” said Manhattan-based attorney Zoe Salzman of Emery Celli Discriminatory tax Brinckerhoff & Abady LLP, who is “These products are an uncon- one of the lawyers on the case. tested necessity for half of the pop- And they’re not the only ones ulation, not a luxury. A tax code fighting against taxing women. that exempts Chapstick, Rogaine, A proactive city councilwoman Viagra, incontinence pads, yet con- from Queens recently discussed tinues to tax sanitary pads and the menstrual inequality issue on tampons is discriminatory, plain radio station WNYC. Council Mem- and simple,” Seibert said. “Jennifer ber Julissa Ferreras-Copeland rep- connected me with the lawyers resents the 21st Council District in forming the Class Action lawsuit Queens and is the head of one of and I became a plaintiff for the the finance committees. It seems case, meeting the other women of many low-income women in her New York who were equally angry district have been having a hard and ready to take action.” time accessing tampons and sani- Seibert said she knew that tary pads. Rosenthal and Serino also intro- Thanks to her efforts, the na- duced similar legislation earlier tion’s first free dispenser of pads this year, so it seemed like this and tampons was installed at a pub- We want you to join our team. united front on “period policy” be- lic high school — the High School came harder and harder to ignore. for Arts and Business in Corona, “Although the state Senate and Queens — last September. And, she We are looking for a Assembly have passed bills to end hopes to make feminine hygiene the tax on tampons and pads with products available in public schools motivated candidate. bipartisan support, the tax has city-wide, along with homeless shel- not yet been repealed,” Seibert ex- ters and correctional facilities. plained. “In order for the Governor No sales experience necessary, to sign off on the bill, it seems we Waiting on Cuomo are waiting on a compromise in This lawsuit and new legislation but a car and liking people language that will clarify which could start a revolutionary across products will be exempt. We know the country. So far, only three is a must! he is supportive — right after we or four states don’t tax tampons. filed the class action lawsuit, there With the success of the suit, the Full benefits, salary and was a very supportive exchange five activists may find themselves via Twitter.” as the new leaders of the national commission The five activists feel that tax- movement to end this unfair taxa- ing products that are biologically tion. necessary is an archaic model that “On behalf of the New York City inherently supports further stig- Council, I call on Gov. Cuomo to matization of menstruation. sign without delay this amendment Jennifer Moore has a 13-year-old to the tax law, and join New York daughter and says the tampon tax to those states and nations that Email resumes to [email protected] is discriminatory and wrong. have seen the light and acknowl- or call Tina at 718-260-8336 “I’m fortunate enough that buy- edge menstrual hygiene products ing feminine hygiene products isn’t as essential to a person’s health a hardship for me, personally, now, and well-being,” said Ferreras- but there was a time in my life Copeland. when I had to watch every penny Tammy Scileppi is a Queens-based I spent and we were just barely freelance writer and journalist, parent, making it from paycheck to pay- and regular contributor to New York check. For women in that circum- Parenting. June 2016 • Manhattan Family 19 Choices for Family Health Directory

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Special Advertising Section June 2016 • Manhattan Family 21 Associated Press / Kathy Willens City museums lay out welcome mat By Shnieka L. JohnSon Metropolitan Museum of Art. Com- (1000 Fifth Ave. at E. 82nd Street on the Museum Mile missioner of Cultural Affairs Tom Upper East Side, www.MetMuseum.org) any parents say that the Finkelpearl and other city and state Festival offers idea of taking their chil- dignitaries will be on hand, followed Gustav klimt’s iconic portrait M dren on a museum outing by a block-party-type atmosphere “adele Bloch-Bauer” is intimidating, The Museum Mile from 6 to 9 pm on Fifth Avenue. The 1907 portrait hangs on per- a fresh look at Festival is a family friendly opportu- More than 1.5 million people have manent display. This work is joined nity to introduce your children to the taken part in this annual celebration by a selection of landscape and por- some classic joys that can be found in our city’s since its inception in 1978. During trait paintings by Klimt, and a dis- cultural institutions. the festival, Fifth Avenue is closed play of Austrian decorative arts from institutions This year’s festival is on Tues- to traffic between 82nd and 105th the early 20th century. day, June 14, and it kicks off with an streets, and attendees (even with Neue Galerie New York (1048 Fifth opening ceremony at 5:45 pm at the strollers) can walk the Mile. There Ave. between E. 85th and E. 86th streets will be family-friendly activities — on the Upper East Side, www.NeueGal- such as live music — throughout erie.org) the evening in front of several of the museums. For this festival, the seven “Moholy-nagy: Future Present” cultural institutions located on the The first comprehensive retro- Mile will be free and open to the pub- spective of the work of László Mo- lic with a range of special exhibitions holy-Nagy to appear in the United and works from their permanent col- States in nearly 50 years, revealing lections on view. a utopian artist who believed that art could work hand-in-hand with Featured exhibitions technology for the betterment of hu- include: manity. “Manus x Machina: Fashion in an Family activity: Museum will offer age of Technology” chalk drawing. This exhibit explores how design- Solomon R. Guggenheim Museum ers reconcile the handmade and (1071 Fifth Ave. between E. 88th and the machine-made in the creation E. 89th streets in Carnegie Hill, www. of haute couture and avant-garde Guggenheim.org)

Associated Press / Bebeto Matthews ready-to-wear. (Above) Pieces from fashion designer Isaac Mizrahi are currently on display at The Family activity: Museum will offer “Beauty – Cooper hewitt Design Jewish Museum. (Top) The Solomon R. Guggenheim Museum and The Metropolitan chalk drawing. Triennial” Museum of Art are also taking part in the Museum Mile Festival. The Metropolitan Museum of Art Exploring aesthetic innovations

22 Manhattan Family • June 2016 signer, artist, and entrepreneur. Family activity: Create an abstract fabric design using stamps and drawing techniques. The Jewish Museum (1109 Fifth Ave. at E. 92nd Street in Carnegie Hill, www. TheJewishMuseum.org)

“Roz Chast: Cartoon Memoirs; New York’s Yiddish Theater” Featuring more than 200 works by this distinguished artist, and showcasing her keen eye for the absurdi- ties and insecurities that permeate daily life, including many situations that are particular to New York City. Museum of the City of New York (1220

Associated Press / Kathy Willens Fifth Ave. between E. 103rd and E. 104th streets in East Harlem, www.MCNY.org)

“Antonio Lopez: Future Funk Fash- ion” Exploring the artist and designer’s daring exploration of race, gender, and the body through fashion. City museums lay Family activity: Art-making. El Museo del Barrio (1230 Fifth Ave. between E. 104th and E. 105th streets in East Harlem, www.ElMuseo.org)

The festival The Museum Mile Festival was out welcome mat established to increase public awareness of its member institutions and By Shnieka L. JohnSon Metropolitan Museum of Art. Com- (1000 Fifth Ave. at E. 82nd Street on the promote public support of the arts. It Museum Mile missioner of Cultural Affairs Tom Upper East Side, www.MetMuseum.org) serves as a model for similar events any parents say that the Finkelpearl and other city and state across the country. Festival offers idea of taking their chil- dignitaries will be on hand, followed Gustav klimt’s iconic portrait Whenever planning your visit to M dren on a museum outing by a block-party-type atmosphere “adele Bloch-Bauer” a cultural institution, tell your child is intimidating, The Museum Mile from 6 to 9 pm on Fifth Avenue. The 1907 portrait hangs on per- what type of museum it is, and the a fresh look at Festival is a family friendly opportu- More than 1.5 million people have manent display. This work is joined rules of the museum. Definitely let nity to introduce your children to the taken part in this annual celebration by a selection of landscape and por- your child know whether or not he some classic joys that can be found in our city’s since its inception in 1978. During trait paintings by Klimt, and a dis- can touch anything in the space. cultural institutions. the festival, Fifth Avenue is closed play of Austrian decorative arts from Also explain the type of things that institutions This year’s festival is on Tues- to traffic between 82nd and 105th the early 20th century. your child will see in the museum, day, June 14, and it kicks off with an streets, and attendees (even with Neue Galerie New York (1048 Fifth such as historical artifacts, paint- opening ceremony at 5:45 pm at the strollers) can walk the Mile. There Ave. between E. 85th and E. 86th streets ings, or photographs. will be family-friendly activities — on the Upper East Side, www.NeueGal- You can preview the space and such as live music — throughout erie.org) the works in the museum with your (Above) Kids can have a blast draw- the evening in front of several of the child by visiting the institution’s ing with chalk in the street outside the museums. For this festival, the seven “Moholy-nagy: Future Present” website. Building these expectations cultural institutions located on the The first comprehensive retro- Museum of the City of New York. (Left) will increase her comfort level with Mile will be free and open to the pub- spective of the work of László Mo- Musicians perform at a past Museum the new space, and will increase her lic with a range of special exhibitions holy-Nagy to appear in the United Mile Festival. excitement about the visit. and works from their permanent col- States in nearly 50 years, revealing Please remember that stroller pol- lections on view. a utopian artist who believed that through 250 works by 63 designers icies still apply at some museums. art could work hand-in-hand with from around the globe. Also, if applicable, participating mu- Featured exhibitions technology for the betterment of hu- Family activity: Imagination Play- seums offer services for visitors with include: manity. ground in the museum’s garden and disabilities. Please contact the mu- “Manus x Machina: Fashion in an Family activity: Museum will offer a sidewalk design activity. seums you plan to visit to arrange age of Technology” chalk drawing. Cooper Hewitt, Smithsonian Design access accommodations. For further This exhibit explores how design- Solomon R. Guggenheim Museum Museum (2 E. 91st St. between Fifth and information and details on the festi- ers reconcile the handmade and (1071 Fifth Ave. between E. 88th and Madison avenues in Carnegie Hill, www. val’s offerings, call (212) 606–2296 or the machine-made in the creation E. 89th streets in Carnegie Hill, www. CooperHewitt.org) visit MuseumMileFestival.org. of haute couture and avant-garde Guggenheim.org) Shnieka Johnson is an education con-

Associated Press / Bebeto Matthews ready-to-wear. “Isaac Mizrahi: An Unruly History” sultant and freelance writer. She resides (Above) Pieces from fashion designer Isaac Mizrahi are currently on display at The Family activity: Museum will offer “Beauty – Cooper hewitt Design The first museum exhibition to in Manhattan with her husband and Jewish Museum. (Top) The Solomon R. Guggenheim Museum and The Metropolitan chalk drawing. Triennial” focus on the Brooklyn native, who is son. Contact her via her website: www. Museum of Art are also taking part in the Museum Mile Festival. The Metropolitan Museum of Art Exploring aesthetic innovations an influential American fashion de- shniekajohnson.com.

June 2016 • Manhattan Family 23 WOMEN Loving summertime ummer means end of school, no more tests, beach fun, S camp, bbqs, bathing suits, sun- block and much more #FabULyssfun. I am personally looking forward to spending a lot of quality time with my family at the beach. You can find me down by the ocean under my big FABULYSS straw hat, lots of sunscreen, and my big dark sunglasses. FINDS To me summer is a time for PLAY. LYSS STERN I recently found the most amazing toy company that I want to share with you. Childhood is a time of wonder. Young children radiate curiosity that’s waiting to be nurtured. But today, most children lead schedule- focused lives. Rushing has replaced spontaneity. Results are valued over process. Increasingly, play and academics are viewed as oppositional went hand in hand and enhanced ity, and, in 2016, GroundSea Fitness instead of intimately connected. every experience. They realized it LLC was born. Through week-long All of their heirloom-quality blocks was music that drove them and ev- wellness retreats offered four times are made of beautiful, purpose- eryone else around them. Flowing to a year, GroundSea guests can re- fully sourced woods, to be enjoyed Jay-Z and down dogging to Cold Play treat, recharge and renew their bod- for generations of play. My 2-year- with the perfect Lennon shivasana, ies, minds and spirits. Each excur- old daughter and her friends will couldn’t be better preparation for sion is hosted in a landmark bed and be drawing with the Eco Crayons their daily regimen. They decided to breakfast with precisely the right and building with Eco Dough at my inject fashion into this concept as a blend of tranquility, charm and ge- beach club. way of expressing their passion for it ography for a fully immersive ex- Rose & Rex believes that play is and a unique and innovative layering perience. The cornerstone of the the foundation for all learning and line for women was born, that fused GroundSea program is daily rigor- development. It is a vital source and music and movement. The idea is for ous hikes through scenic mountain functional tool that helps children anyone who wears our brand to feel ranges led by a cadre of private in- gain fundamental skills that they will free and sexy and stand out while structors. The gourmet ovovegetar- carry through school and into adult- standing in. You can wear rie + ryn ian cuisine is prepared by an award- hood. There is no better time than to a hot yoga class and take it off winning chef using only organic, summer for kids to be kids. and I love just when the room heats up or tear dairy-free, fair-trade ingredients. that Rose & Rex has many different it off on the spin bike and throw it Other daily activities included mind- options to open the children’s minds back on right before the lights come fulness meditation, yoga and per- to explore and use their imagina- on. Most likely, you’ll see Carrie and sonal training. Each day ends with tions. I wish this company was cre- Taryn rocking’ their shirts with skin- healing and restorative massage in ated when my boys were little. nies and stilettos. It’s all about the the comfort of your own room. Reiki www.roseandrex.com balance. energy healing, health and wellness • • • The line is designed for Street to lectures and personal nutrition or I must introduce you to one of my Studio wear and is versatile, fun, and health consultations available in the new #FabULyssfinds. As many of you always evolving. evenings. I entered back into the already know, I love wearing yoga www.rieandryn.com concrete jungle #NYC more relaxed, clothes during the day, even when • • • calm and ready to take everything I am not exercising. Rie + Ryn is A few weeks ago, I went on a much on after my trip. I am already signed the collaboration of a friendship be- needed #MTO (mommy time out) re- up for the next trip in October, make tween Carrie (Rie) and Taryn (Ryn). treat to the Berkshires. sure to e-mail for information before Their mutual love of music, fitness Run... don’t walk to GroundSea Fit- they are sold out. and fashion inspired them to cre- ness. I was able to recharge, retreat www.groundseafitness.com ate Rie + Ryn. Carrie and Taryn are and renew! Inspired and invigorated Enjoy the beautiful sunshine, sun- yogis at heart, but love to mix it up. by yearly spa trips and fitness re- sets and don’t forget to power down! They quickly realized their favorite treats, sisters Tracy Gaslow, Denise Spend #FabULyss quality time this classes were driven by the teachers Kleinman and best friend Hollie Levy summer with your friends and family. who played the best music. they turned their passion for health Lyss Stern is the founder of DivaLyss- The fusion of yoga and music and wellness into perennial possibil- cious Moms (www.divamoms.com).

24 Manhattan Family • June 2016 ADVICEAdvice You bought property together. What now? My spouse and I bought an apart- validity of the marriage is later chal- ment together before we were mar- lenged, the ownership will be deemed ried. The deed states that we own it a tenancy in common, which does not as “joint tenants with rights of survi- provide for survivorship interest. ASK AN vorship.” Is our apartment protected If the property at issue is a cooper- from creditors? What happens to our ative apartment, the rules described ATTORNEY ownership interests if one of us dies or above only apply since 1996. Prior ALISON ARDEN BESUNDER, we get divorced? to 1996, shares in cooperative apart- ESQ. ments were not deemed to be the here are three general meth- equivalent of real property and could ods to categorize ownership not be held as tenants-by-entirety. T in real property in New York As noted above, tenants-by-the- State: tenancy in common, joint ten- entirety are afforded extra creditor ancy with rights of survivorship, and protection on their home that is not tenancy by the entirety. A provision available to joint tenancy with rights in the statutory law makes ownership of survivorship tenants. For exam- of shares in a cooperative apartment ple, if your husband has judgment equivalent to real property interests. creditors, that creditor cannot satisfy the judgment against the apartment Tenancy in common A tenancy-by-the-entirety affords while you continue to own it with A tenancy in common means that greater creditor protection to the sur- your husband as a tenant-by-the-en- each person has a share of interest viving tenant. It is only available to tirety. If you hold the property as joint in the property. It can be in 50-50 those who are married at the time tenants, the creditor may enforce the shares or any other allocation. they take title. If you take title before judgment against your husband’s in- you are married, as joint tenancy terest in the apartment. Although it is Joint tenancy with with rights of survivorship, and later limited to your husband’s indivisible rights of survivorship marry, the tenancy-by-the-entirety one-half interest in that case, it could In a joint tenancy with rights of does not automatically spring into ef- force a sale of the apartment. survivorship, a joint owner’s interest fect or convert the joint tenancy with There are many more elements to can be sold or encumbered during rights of survivorship to tenancy-by- consider when assessing ownership his or her lifetime with the consent of the-entirety. of property, and every situation is the other joint tenants, however, his Rather, you would need to execute different. It is always a good idea to or her share cannot be devised in a a new deed reflecting the change in review titling to your assets upon will before or after death. Instead, it ownership status. Even if you closed the occurrence of any life change — passes to the surviving joint tenants on the apartment the day before your whether marriage, death, divorce, — hence the “right of survivorship.” wedding and the deed says “as hus- or the birth of a child or grandchild, Put another way, the last man band and wife,” if you were not legally and to update your documents to standing takes full ownership to the married when you received title, the ensure they continue to meet your property. title would likely be deemed by a goals and objectives. You should court of law as joint tenancy with always consult with your attorney Tenancy by the entirety rights of survivorship. In more recent before undertaking any changes. A tenancy-by-the-entirety is a years, attorneys more frequently use Alison Arden Besunder is the found- heightened form of tenancy available the phrase “as spouses” to appropri- ing attorney of the law firm of Arden to married spouses who take title ately reflect the legal changes to the Besunder P.C., where she assists new to the property. Since the passage definition and scope of marriage. and not-so-new parents with their estate of the Marriage Equality Act in New These rules only apply to transac- planning needs. Her firm assists clients York State in 2011, this is available to tions that occurred after 1975. If the in Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, Nas- all spouses, whether opposite-sex or real property at issue was purchased sau, and Suffolk Counties. You can find same-sex. It affords not only survivor- before 1975, and the deed states that Alison Besunder on Twitter @estatetrust- ship rights, but also certain creditor the parties were married when in fact plan and on her website at www.besun- protection rights. the parties were not married or the derlaw.com.

Disclaimer: This column is provided by Arden Besunder P.C. and New York Parenting Media as a public service to inform readers of legal issues. It is not intended to advise. Since legal issues vary with an individual’s situation and needs, one should consult with an attorney. It is impossible to cover all aspects of the law in an article. Please be advised that the laws are constantly changing. The content in this article reflects the current law. Nothing contained in this article is intended as advice and does not create an attorney-client relationship between the reader and the firm. Individual consultation with an attorney is required to determine the specific facts and circumstances of any particular situation. A written retainer agreement between you and the firm is required before any attorney-client relationship may be created. Circular 230 Disclosure Notice: To ensure compliance with Treasury Department rules governing tax practice, we inform you that any advice contained herein (including in any attachment) (1) was not written and is not intended to be used, and cannot be used, for the purpose of avoiding any federal tax penalty that may be imposed on the taxpayer, and (2) may not be used in connection with promoting, marketing or recommending to another person any transaction or matter addressed herein. June 2016 • Manhattan Family 25 The fury inside Learning to master anger before it destroys you

By Carolyn WaterBury- tieman

ast week, a parent walked down the street to visit a neighbor, L her children following in a child- sized, motorized vehicle. The driver was about age 4 with a not yet 2-year-old passenger. While the adults chatted, the youngster drove haphazardly around the court, over lawns and curbs. Even- tually the parent noticed and screamed at the preschool-aged driver to be more careful, at which point he struck the curb head on nearly ejecting his sister into the street. Finally, moved to action, the parent ran to the miniature car yelling at the miniature driver who was pulled from behind the wheel and loudly scolded for his irresponsibility. I think you could safely say she was angry. But with whom? And why? Anger is a natural human emotion, a signal that something is awry. Anger is a seductive, deceptive emotion creating the illusion of being in control when we are actually losing control. Like wild ani- mals with features that enhance their size when threatened, we feel bigger and tougher when we are angry. How- ever, anger is a secondary emotion, meaning that another feeling was experienced first, sometimes for only an instant. Feelings that typically precede anger are fear, disappoint- ment, embarrassment, guilt, inadequacy, even fatigue or hunger. The common factor is the vulnerability these emotions produce. Vulnerability makes us uncomfortable, so we revert to anger because we feel more powerful. Therefore, anger arises from a sense of deficiency, surfacing when we are op- erating from a real or perceived deficit. The deficit may exist in any number of areas from time, knowledge, ability, or confidence, to appreciation or love. Anger is the mask of certainty we put on

26 Manhattan Family • June 2016 The goal is not to eliminate anger from the June 2016 emotional repertoire, but to express it in ways MANHATTAN FREE that are not destructive to our relationships. Family in the midst of a crisis of doubt. them appropriately. Where Every Child Matters As a defense mechanism, anger protects us from feelings we would Providing outlets rather deny. It prevents us from for anger First-time taking responsibility for and deal- Intense feelings create physical ing with our true feelings, allow- tension. Establish rules for accepting us to direct the energy from able ways to channel this energy. dads those uncomfortable feelings out- When angry, hitting, swearing, and ward, against others. We transfer name calling are not allowed, but the responsibility for our anger to kicking a ball, screaming into a pil- 6 summer the other person, justifying our ac- low, or going for a walk are. While math games tions using the logic that since it’s releasing the tension is important, their fault we feel this way, they de- returning to resolve the conflict is serve whatever we dish out. Some essential. Fighting the of us become so comfortable with tampon tax anger, it appears to be instanta- Being honest neous, bypassing the original emo- Identify that initial feeling you tion altogether. Like any habit, it experienced. Carefully select your Tweens left becomes an unconscious choice, words to convey the message you home alone but a choice nevertheless. need the other person to hear, in The goal is not to eliminate anger a way they can hear it. Remember from the emotional repertoire, but honesty is not cruel, disrespectful, Find us online at www.NYParenting.com to express it in ways that are not or snotty. Honesty invites coopera- destructive to our relationships. tion and seeks resolution. We can manage our anger more ef- fectively, and teach our children to Using focused do the same, by: listening Give the other party a chance to If you like Correcting respond. Listening is a total body assumptions experience requiring your eyes, Many of us grew up with mis- mind, and feelings, as well as your the magazine guided notions about anger — you ears. Notice physical, as well as shouldn’t get angry with people verbal cues, such as eye contact, you love, anger leads to abandon- facial expression, tone of voice, and ment or violence, anger should body posture. you’ll love be kept inside, anger is bad and so are people who become angry. Being apologetic But, feelings are neither right nor Saying “I’m sorry” for repeated the site. wrong. How we choose to express transgressions gets old. An apology them makes the difference. should include what you are sorry for, why you were wrong, what you Developing realistic plan to do to correct the situation, expectations Accept anger as a natural human Forgiving emotion that everyone is going to Grant forgiveness readily and Check us out! experience. Identify your anger trig- completely when offered a genuine gers and help your children identify apology. The parent of the errant theirs. When we recognize situa- preschool driver probably experi- tions that ignite our anger, we are enced a mixture of fear, embarrass- NYParenting.com better prepared to manage them. ment, and guilt. Her disappoint- ment with herself was directed to- Increasing feeling ward the child. Rather than learn word vocabulary that being unsafe is scary, he We tend to limit our feeling de- learned that anger is scary. scriptions to sad, mad, happy, glad, Where every family matters and when there is a whole range of Remember, love is not the ab- human emotions. Search for age- sence of anger. Love is the desire where New York parents find help, appropriate lists of feeling words to address the source of the anger to share with your family. The more and prevent its destructive force in accurately we label our feelings, the relationship. Be slow to anger info and support. the more likely we are to express and quick to forgive.

June 2016 • Manhattan Family 27 HealtHy eating Get grillin’ for Dad ne of my favorite days of the year to cook is Father’s Day. O Whether it’s at the park, beach, or backyard, a big family barbecue is an all-day activity that everyone can enjoy! I like to set up water activities and games for the kids, cold beverages for the dads, Tips for and a hot grill for myself. Here are a few tips on hosting a fun family feeding kids cookout: Chef Joanna DeVita invest in a grill basket for cooking veggies. Avoid loosing all that produce into the grill by purchas- ing a metal basket that is made for vegetables. You will be surprised how many vegetables taste great on the grill. You’ve heard of grilled pep- pers and onions, but have you tried grilled green bean or potato slices? it’s garlic scape time! During just a few weeks in late spring and early summer, the tops of garlic plants produce garlic scapes. These trimmings off the garlic plant are widely available at green markets and produce retailers during their brief season. They taste like garlic, just sweeter, juicier, and less pun- gent. They are amazing on the grill, finished with some good sea salt, a squeeze of lemon, and a drizzle of high-quality olive oil. try grilling a whole fish. Though heat of the grill. The fish is done Keep the kids occupied with a it may seem intimidating, grilling when you put the tip of a paring healthy snack. Grilling for a crowd the whole fish is not so hard, once knife into the thickest part, near the takes time. Kids usually get hungry you’ve given it a try. The grill must top of the head, and leave it there and antsy before dinner is done. be very hot and well oiled. Place for a few seconds. If the tip meets no I like to keep them fed with some some thin slices of lemon, herb resistance when piercing the flesh hot, fresh quesadillas. I always sprigs, and salt and pepper inside and comes out still hot, the fish is pack corn tortillas and our favor- the cavity of the fish (trout, sea cooked through. Allow the fish to ite cheese when cooking out. In bass, snapper, and sea bream all rest for a bit, then serve. Make sure between veggies and proteins on work well for this). Rub the skin of to have a butter knife, spoon, and the grill, I sneak on a few quesadil- the fish with oil, salt, and pepper. extra bowl when serving the fish so las for the kids. This way they get a Grill, without moving it, for about you are able to fillet it at the table. substantial snack to hold them over five to 12 minutes per side, depend- Use a rub on your steak instead until dinner. ing on the size of the fish and the of a marinade. Dry rubs can help make your grilled meats tender, juicy, and flavorful! I like to use skirt DIRECTIONS: Mix all dry rub ingre- Make sure the grill is well oiled. grill grilled skirt steak steak with my favorite rub (recipe dients together in bowl. rub three the skirt steak on medium high for with dry rub follows). Skirt steak can be sliced pounds of trimmed skirt steak with about 7-12 minutes on each side, serves 6 thin and goes really well with warm enough of the dry rub to coat well. depending on how rare you like your corn tortillas! DRY RUB INGREDIENTS: (save the rest of the rub for another steak. After removing it from the Joanna DeVita is executive chef at 3 tbs kosher salt use.) Let the meat marinate overnight grill, allow meat to rest for at least Léman Manhattan Preparatory School. 1 tbs granulated garlic or garlic in the fridge in an airtight container. 10 minutes before slicing. She is the mother of two children and powder preheat grill to medium high. Allow Cut steak against the grain with a loves nothing more than spending time 1 tbs smoked paprika the meat to sit outside the refrigera- sharp knife into thin slices. sprinkle with them outdoors and sharing with 2 tsp freshly ground black pepper tor for about an hour before grilling sliced steak with flaky sea salt and a them her love and respect for nature, 2 tsp brown sugar to take the chill off. squeeze of lime. good ingredients, and the joy of cooking.

28 Manhattan Family • June 2016 A Hilarious Night of Laundry, Laughs and Liquor!

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June 2016 • Manhattan Family 29 Calendarjune Photo by Liz Ligon

Get on the fast track to the High tion “Wanderlust.” Line and then take it slow during Make it Slow, June 25 from 10 am A slow day at the Make it Slow family day event to 2 pm; free. on June 25. Hosted by the Friends of the Families come together in a new High Line. the High Line dynamic way and learn the value of The High Line [14th Street passage taking things slowly while children and 10th Avenue in Chelsea, (212) create art using inspiration from 206–9922, [email protected]; the- the High Line Art’s group exhibi- highline.org/activities].

30 Manhattan Family • June 2016 Never miss a great event! Sign up for our FREE newsletter and get twice-a-week ideas for you and your family right in your mailbox. NYParenting.com Calendar

Submit a listing This calendar is dedicated to bringing our readers the most comprehensive list of events in your area. But to do so, we need your help! Send your listing request to manhattancalendar@cnglocal. com — and we’ll take care of the rest. Please e-mail requests more than three weeks prior to the event to ensure we have enough time to get it in. And best of all, it’s FREE!

Wed, June 1 In Manhattan Wednesdays in Teardrop: Tear- drop Park, Warren Street and River Terrace; (212) 267–9700; http://www. bpcparks.org; 8 am; Free. Energetic lawn games and art projects, such as clay, collage, paint- City kids dancing to poetry ing and group murals. Everything provided. “Words with Wings” flies into the New York City public schools as they pm; Tickets are $20 in advance; New York University Skirball Cen- dance to choregraphy and music in- $25 at the door. El Museo del Barrio Presents Pop-Up Arte: Mae Grant Play- ter for the Performing Arts for two spired by the writings of Dr. Seuss, NYU Skirball Center for the Per- ground, Madison Avenue at 104th performaces on June 12 and 13. Pre- Shel Silverstein, Maya Angelo, and forming Arts [566 LaGuardia Place Street; (212) 408–0243; http://www. sented by the National Dance Insti- others. Guest poet Aja Monet will be between W. Third Street and Wash- nycgovparks.org; 3 pm to 4:30 pm; tute, the event highlights poetry to performing among a host of others. ington Square South in Greenwich Vil- Free. benefit the school’s programs. Fea- “Words with Wings,” June 12 at lage, (212) 226–0083, www.nationald Families! Kids! Join us for fun-filled turing more than 200 students from 2 pm and 5 pm and June 13 at 6:30 ance.org]. sessions of art in June, July, and Au- gust throughout Harlem. El Museo del Barrio will offer art-making work- shops at select locations. All ages Summer on the Hudson brings Movies under the stars presents this Teen Night: Battery Park Conser- welcome. Raga Kids, a trio of teaching artists film about two pals and their dog Bar- vancy Rec. room, 6 River Terrace; specializing in Indian classical music kley. Bring a blanket or chair. Bottled (212) 267–9700; www.bpcparks.org; Drop in Chess: Rockefeller Park, on Indian instruments. This event is water is ok, but no glass. First come, 4 pm; Free. Murray Street and River Terrace; (212) held on a comfy, danceable turf lawn first served basis. Friday Night for Teens is a free pro- 267–9700; www.bpcparks.org; 3:30 right by the big locomotive. Great for gram that gives 13 to 19 year olds pm; Free. kids 5 years old and under. a safe space to have fun and hang Children 5 and older learn the Fri, June 3 Arts and games: Rockefeller Park, out. Teens can drop by to play games strategy of the game and get point- In Manhattan like table tennis, foosball, super-sized ers and advice from an expert. Chess Murray Street and River Terrace; (212) 267–9700; www.bpcparks.org; 3:30 Shorefront science: Fort Tryon Connect-4, board games, or just hang improves concentration, problem solv- out. ing, and strategic planning — plus, pm; Free. Park, Thayer Street and Broadway; it’s fun! Adults welcome. Children 5 and older let their inner (212) 795–1388; www.nycgovparks. artist shine! Join in for fun and cre- org; 3 to 4:30 pm; Free. Sat, June 4 Playdate with Uni Project at ative art activities. After completing Ever wonder how many different Chelsea Park: Chelsea Park, W. In Manhattan your masterpiece, release that pent- trees are in your neighborhood? Join 28th Street and 10th Avenue; www. up energy with organized lawn games Dr. A of Storefront Science to learn Shine and the Moonbeams: nycgovparks.org; 3:30 pm to 5:30 like tag and tug-o-war. how to ID them by examining their Lincoln Center’s David Rubinstein pm; Free. Atrium, Broadway between W. 62nd Uni Project: Sara D. Roosevelt Park, leaves and trunks. Strengthen your Come read, draw, play, and explore tree ID skills as you learn about dif- and W. 63rd streets; (212)-875–5456; hands-on activities at the Uni pop-up Hester Street Crossing; 311; nycgov- ferent characteristics and traits to 11 am; Free. reading room. Read-alouds begin at parks.org; 3:30 pm to 5:30 pm; Free. look for in order to identify trees even Get up and dance! With infectious 4:30 pm. Other special activities to be Come read and draw at the Uni without their leaves! Space is lim- rhythms and catchy melodies, Shine announced. Free for all ages. every Thursday through the end of ited to 15 children (ages 5–11). RSVP and the Moonbeams infuse classic June in Sara D. Roosevelt Park at the funk, soul, blues, and jazz music to Hester Street crossing in Chinatown! is required; to register, please email Thurs, June 2 [email protected]. bring a brand new R&B sound to kids Made possible by Green Below 14 and families in this soulful extrava- In Manhattan and Leaves of Grass Fund. “Puss in Boots”: Hells Kitchen ganza. Celebrating the global fam- Locomotive Lawn Live Concert “Bark Ranger”: Lillian D. Wald Park, 10th Ave. between 47th and ily, this local band rejoices the heart Series: Locomotive Lawn, Riverside Playground, Cheery Street and Mont- 48th streets; www.ctyparksfounda- of music and delights audiences with Park South and West End Avenue; gomery Street; (212) 408–0243; tion.org; 4 pm to 5 pm; Free. its distinctive sound, energy, and 311; nycgovparks.org; 10:30 am to nycgovparks.org; 8:30 pm to 10:30 Presented by CityParks PuppetMo- jubilation. 11:30 am; Free. pm; Free. bile this is the old tale — with a twist. Continued on page 32 June 2016 • Manhattan Family 31 Calendar Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar

Continued from page 31 helmet for proper fit. Most kids learn Learn softball: Chelsea Park, W. to ride in one session, but even if they 28th Street and 10th Avenue; www. don’t, they can join us for another nycgovparks.org; 11 am to 2 pm; free class! Free. Learn softball: 11 am to 2 pm. Children 5 to 18 years old learn the Chelsea Park. See Saturday, June 4. basics. Spring Celebration Concert: Teen Dance Concert: 92nd Street 92nd Street Y Art Center, 135 Lexing- Y Art Center, 135 Lexington Ave.; (212) 415–5562; 7 pm; $19. ton Ave.; (212) 415–5562; 12:30 pm and 3:30 pm; $20–$25. This end-of-the-year concert is the culmination of dance study that 92Y The Young People’s Chorus pres- Harkness Dance Center students have ents two performances showcasing been working on for the past year. music from all genres that will engage, entertain, and leave you wishing for more. Sun, June 5 Play Dates on the Hudson: West In Manhattan Harlem Park, 125th Street and Mar- Children’s Dance Concert: 92nd ginal Street; 311; www.nycgovparks. Street Y Art Center, 135 Lexington org; 1 pm 4 pm; Free. Ave.; (212) 415–5562; 11 am and 3 Mil’s Trills invites families to cele- pm; $19. brate the community through interac- This end-of-the-year concert is the R&B for the family tive performances that feature original culmination of dance study that 92Y tunes and a rotating cast of musical Harkness Dance Center students have Shine and the Moonbeams families in this soulful extrava- guests. been working on for the past year. sheds its rays at the David ganza. Celebrating the global Le Carrousel Kids: Bryant Park, “Puss in Boots”: Stuyvesant Rubenstein Atrium at Lincoln family, this local band rejoices 42nd Street and Avenue of the Ameri- Square, E. 16th Street and Second Av- Center on June 4. the heart of music and delights cas; (212) 768–4242; www.bryant- enue; hit://www.CityParksFoundation. Get up and dance with the audiences with its distinctive park.org; 1 pm to 2 pm; Free. org; 2:30 pm to 3:30 pm; Free. infectious rhythms and catchy sound, energy, and jubilation. Puppets, puppets and more pup- Presented by CityParks PuppetMo- melodies that Shine and the Shine and the Moonbeams on pets in this fun telling of “Goldilocks bile this is the old tale — with a twist. Moonbeams infuse in clas- June 4, at 11 am. Free. and the Three Bears.” “The Ugly Duckling”: Anne Loftus sic funk, soul, blues, and jazz Lincoln Center’s David Rubinstein “First Folio”: New-York Historical Playground, Dyckman Street and Sea- music. Atrium [Broadway between W. 62nd Society DiMenna Children’s History man Avenue; (212) 795–1388; www. The group brings its spe- and W. 63rd streets at Lincoln Center, Museum, 170 Central Park West at nycgovparks.org; 3 pm to 4 pm; Free. cial brand of R&B to kids and (212) -875–5456]. W. 77th Street; (212) 873–3400; ny- NY Scandia Symphony presents this history.org; 1 to 4 pm; Free with mu- year’s Children’s Educational Music seum admission. Program featuring the fairy tale “The Children of all ages will enjoy this Ugly Duckling” by Hans Christian An- shops at select locations. All ages surrounded by amazing feats of en- dersen performed by Scandia Sym- welcome. gineering. Have you ever wondered special exhibition as “First Folio – The how buildings and bridges are able Book that Gave Us Shakespeare,” phony musicians and guests. Enjoy Drop in Chess: 3:30 pm. Rocke- to hold so many people, cars, and comes to life! The Frog & Peach The- Alyssa Reit on harp, Yael Acher-Modi- feller Park. See Wednesday, June 1. ano on flute, and Peter Reit on French trucks? Join Dr. Leonisa Ardizzone of atre Company will be in the gallery Horn. Don’t miss your opportunity to Playdate with Uni Project at Storefront Science to explore the form all afternoon to demonstrate the play the harp at the end of the show! Chelsea Park: 3:30 pm to 5:30 pm. and function, as well as the strength performance of a scene and answer Chelsea Park. See Wednesday, June 1. and stability of structures as we de- your questions about continuing the sign and build our own models! Space 400-year-old tradition of acting out Wed, June 8 is limited to 15 children (ages 5–11). Shakespeare. In Manhattan Thurs, June 9 RSVP is required; to register, please email [email protected]. Mil’s Trills: Hudson Park, 125th Wednesdays in Teardrop: 8 am. In Manhattan Street and Marginal Street; 311; Teardrop Park. See Wednesday, June Locomotive Lawn Live Concert Teen Night: 4 pm. Battery Park http://nycgovparks.org; 1 pm to 4 1. Series: 10:30 am to 11:30 am. Loco- Conservancy Rec room. See Friday, pm; Free. June 3. “Puss in Boots”: Hudson Park, motive Lawn. See Thursday, June 2. Come and dance along with the greatest kind rocker of all. 11th Avenue and W. 36th Street; Arts and games: 3:30 pm. Rock- http://nycgovparks.org; 10:30 am to efeller Park. See Thursday, June 2. Sat, June 11 Family camping: Central Park, 11:30 am; Free. In Manhattan 79th Street Transverse; (212) 628– Presented by CityParks PuppetMo- Uni Project: 3:30 pm to 5:30 pm. Learn to ride: Seward Park, E. 2345; www.nycgovparks.org; 6 pm to bile this is the old tale — with a twist. Sara D. Roosevelt Park. See Thursday, 8 am; Free. June 2. Broadway and Canal Street; (718) El Museo del Barrio Present 408–0243; nycgovparks.org; 11 am to We camp to create lasting memo- Pop-Up Arte: Poor Richard’s Play- 2 pm; Free. ries, connect with the natural world, ground, Second Avenue and E. 107th Fri, June 10 Learn to Ride is a free class for and bond with our families. Camping Street; (2120 408–0243; http://www. affords us the opportunity to unplug In Manhattan adults and mature teens who are nycgovparks.org; 3 pm to 4:30 pm; ready to ride. It doesn’t matter how from the diversions of everyday life Free. Shorefront science: Fort Tryon old you are, we’ll get you rolling in and to laugh and play with our fami- Families! Kids! Join us for fun-filled Park, Thayer Street and Broadway; no time. With our safe, easy, effective lies. The Urban Park Rangers celebrate sessions of art in June, July and Au- (212) 795–1388; www.nycgovparks. method, Learn to Ride students learn the tradition of camping and we look gust throughout Harlem. El Museo org; 3 pm to 4:30 pm; Free. how to balance, pedal, start, stop, forward to welcoming your family. del Barrio will offer art-making work- Living on Manhattan Island, we are and steer a bike, as well as adjust a Registration required. 32 Manhattan Family • June 2016 Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar Calendar Sun, June 12 games for children during this two- hour exploration session. In Manhattan Teen Night: 4 pm. Battery Park Brady Rymer: City Winery, 155 Conservancy Rec room. See Friday, Varick St.; www.citywinery.com; 11 June 3. am; $15. The kindie rock sensation and his Sat, June 18 band the Little Band that Could will be releasing his latest album, Press In Manhattan Play. Learn softball: 11 am to 2 pm. Drums along the Hudson: Indian Chelsea Park. See Saturday, June 4. Road in Inwood Hill Park, 218th Street Le Carrousel Kids: Bryant Park, and Indian Road; (212) 795–1388; 42nd Street and Avenue of the Ameri- http://www.nycgovparks.org; 11 am cas; (212) 768–4242; www.bryant- to 6 pm; Free. park.org; 1 pm to 2 pm; Free. Native American, Japanese, Bra- A fun puppet show of the “Three zilian, Flamenco, and Korean danc- Little Pigs.” Who will blow the house ers and drummers from around the down? world! The festival combines a cel- “Open Season Scared Silly”: ebration of Native American heritage, Sol Lain Playground, Henry Street and culture, and art with the diversity of Montgomery Street; nycgovparks.org; New York City. Spanish, African, Bra- 8:30 pm to 10:30 pm; Free. zilian, and Tibetan cultures will also Youth takes the stage Elliott, Boog, and friends return for be celebrated with food, music, and an all-new adventure in the wilder- dancing. Activities include a Tree of The Young People’s Chorus will Directed by Francisco J Nunez, ness in this animated family comedy Peace planting, international cuisine, perform two concerts on June 11 founder and artistic director. directed by David Feiss. Bring a blan- Native American storytelling, a Pow at the 92nd Street Y Art Center. Annual Spring Concert Cele- ket to sit on, as there will be a limited Wow, crafts. and visits from Captain The annual Spring Concert bration, June 11 at 12:30 pm and supply of chairs available. Water bot- Planet. Celebration spotlights the award- 3:30 pm. Tickets range from $20 tles are OK, but no glass. “Words with Wings”: NYU Skir- winning Young People’s Chorus of to $25. ball Center for the Performing Arts, New York and showcases music 92nd Street Y Art Center [135 Sun, June 19 from all genres that will engage Lexington Ave in Kips Bay, (212) 566 LaGuardia Pl.; (212) 226–0083; In Manhattan www.nationaldance.org; 2 pm and 5 and leave you wishing for more. 415–5562].. Saltwater Fishing: 10th Street pm; $20 in advance ($25 at the door). Walking Bridge, FDR Drive and E. 10th National Dance Institute presents Street; nycgovparks.org; 2 pm to 4 the power of poetry benefit perfor- Wed, June 15 efeller Park. See Thursday, June 2. pm; Free. mance featuring 200 students from In Manhattan Uni Project: 3:30 pm to 5:30 pm. Catch-and-release fishing is a great New York City public schools, , spo- Sara D. Roosevelt Park. See Thursday, way to get outdoors and discover na- ken word artist Aja Monet, and music Wednesdays in Teardrop: 8 am. June 2. ture just a few blocks from home. Our and choreography inspired by the Teardrop Park. See Wednesday, June experienced Rangers teach the eth- 1. “Despicable Me”: Sara D. writings of Dr. Seuss, Shel Silversein, ics of fishing and the ecology of our Roosevelt Park, Hester Street Cross- Maya Angelou, and others. waterways on every fishing program. El Museo del Barrio Present ing; 311; nycgovparks.org; 3:30 pm to You can try to hook a pumpkin- Pop-Up Arte: Bloomingdale Play- 5:30 pm; Free. ground, W. 105th Street and Amster- seed sunfish, carp or chain pickerel. Mon, June 13 In a happy suburban neighborhood dam Avenue; (2120 408–0243; http:// Whether you choose to grab a simple surrounded by white picket fences In Manhattan www.nycgovparks.org; 3 pm to 4:30 bamboo pole at a quiet lake or join sits a black house with a dead lawn. pm; Free. more advanced saltwater programs, Shorefront science: Fort Tryon Unbeknownst to the neighbors, hid- Families! Kids! Join us for fun-filled we have a program that fits your skill Park, Thayer Street and Broadway; den deep beneath this home is a vast sessions of art in June, July and Au- level. All equipment is provided; this (212) 795–1388; www.nycgovparks. secret hideout. Surrounded by an gust throughout Harlem. El Museo program is recommended for ages 8 org; 3:30 pm to 5 pm; Free. army of tireless, little yellow minions, del Barrio will offer art-making work- years and older. Participation is first- Think of your perfect playground. we discover Gru planning the biggest shops at select locations. All ages come, first-served. Do you wish to have more adventure, heist in the history of the world. He is welcome. more climbing, more basketball, more going to steal the moon. Bring a blan- “Fiddler on the Roof” sing-a- modern play equipment or garden- Drop in Chess: 3:30 pm. Rocke- ket or chair. Water bottles okay, but long: Museum of Jewish Heritage, ing at your ideal playground? Come feller Park. See Wednesday, June 1. no glass. 36 Battery Pl. at First Place; (646) 437–4202; www.mjhnyc.org; 3 pm; spend time with Dr. A exploring the Playdate with Uni Project at $15 ($10 members; $36 for a family math, engineering, and physics of Chelsea Park: 3:30 pm to 5:30 pm. Fri, June 17 the playground, and then get creative Chelsea Park. See Wednesday, June 1. of 4). In Manhattan about what your perfect playground Members of the National Yid- Shorefront science: Fort Tryon dish Theatre Folksbiene present a would look like! Space is limited to 15 Thurs, June 16 children (ages 5–11). RSVP is required; Park, Thayer Street and Broadway; very special Father’s Day event with cast members Rosalind Harris, Neva to register, please email RSVP@FortT- In Manhattan (212) 795–1388; www.nycgovparks. org; 3 pm to 4:30 pm; Free. Small, Adam Shapiro, and other spe- ryonParkTrust.org. Locomotive Lawn Live Concert After school pop-up program cial guests who will come in costume Series: 10:30 am to 11:30 am. Loco- “Words with Wings”: 6:30 pm. teaches children to identify different and sing your favorite hits from the motive Lawn. See Thursday, June 2. NYU Skirball Center for the Perform- trees and insects. Test and play vari- 1971 film. ing Arts. See Sunday, June 12. Arts and games: 3:30 pm. Rock- ous science tools through interactive Continued on page 34 June 2016 • Manhattan Family 33 Calendar Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar

Continued from page 33 Tues, June 21 In Manhattan ‘Women on the Edge’ Summer Garden Concert: Mount Vernon Hotel Museum & Garden, 421 Come and celebrate women at music. E. 61st St. between First and York a special family matinee at the The event is suitable for fami- avenues; (212) 838–6878; www. Joyce Theater on June 21, 23, 25 lies with children 6 to 14 years mvhm.org; 6 pm to 7:30 pm; $ 15 ($5 and 26. old. children under 12; Free to children “Women on the Edge: Unsung “Women on the Edge: Unsung under 1). Heroines of the Trojan War” is Heroines of the Trojan War,” June Listen to Frank Hendricks and Bob presented by the Rioult Dance 21 at 7:30 pm, June 23 at 8 pm, Conroy of STOUT, who will perform group, which invites the audi- June 25 at 8 pm, June 26 and 7:30 tavern tunes, combining hearty vocal harmonies and acoustic instruments. ence to experience the profound pm. Tickets start at $10. Museum tour and historic cocktail in- and timeless anti-war statement, The Joyce Theater [175 Eighth cluded. Join as a museum member featuring the world premiere of Ave. at W. 20th Street in Chelsea, and admission is free. “Cassandra’s Curse” set to live (212) 398–5901, www.joyce.org]. Photo by Richard Kirk Smith

Wed, June 22 Uni Project: 3:30 pm to 5:30 pm. Street; 311; www.nycgovparks.org; 11 pm to 3:30 pm; Free. In Manhattan Sara D. Roosevelt Park. See Thursday, am to 3 pm; Free. Presented by CityParks PuppetMo- Wednesdays in Teardrop: 8 am. June 2. Summer on the Hudson and the bile this is the old tale — with a twist. Teardrop Park. See Wednesday, June Urban Park Rangers invite you to “Despicable Me”: 3:30 pm to 1. spend a day in West Harlem Piers Park 5:30 pm. Sara D. Roosevelt Park. See connecting to the life living within the Wed, June 29 El Museo del Barrio Present Thursday, June 16. Pop-Up Arte: Martin Luther King Hudson River. Activities include catch In Manhattan Playground, Malcolm X Boulevard. and release fishing, Arm of the Sea Wednesdays in Teardrop: 8 am. and W. 112th Street; (212) 408–0243; Fri, June 24 puppet theatre, Music with Patrick, Teardrop Park. See Wednesday, June and river-related arts and crafts. Fish- http://www.nycgovparks.org; 3 pm to In Manhattan 1. 4:30 pm; Free. ing equipment will be provided. El Museo del Barrio Present Families! Kids! Join us for fun-filled Swedish Midsummer Festival: Le Carrousel Kids: Bryant Park, Pop-Up Arte: Cherry Tree Park, E. sessions of art in June, July and Au- Robert F. Wagner Park, Battery Park 42nd Street and Avenue of the Ameri- 99th Street and Third Avenue; (212) gust throughout Harlem. El Museo City; (212) 267–9700; http://www. cas; (212) 768–4242; www.bryant- 408–0243; http://www.nycgovparks. del Barrio will offer art-making work- bpca.ny.gov; 5 pm; Free. park.org; 1 pm to 2 pm; Free. org; 3 pm to 4:30 pm; Free. shops at select locations. All ages Enjoy a celebration of the summer See who will win the race in this Families! Kids! Join us for fun-filled welcome. solstice with traditional Swedish folk fun puppet show of “The Tortoise sessions of art in June, July and Au- music and dancing, wreath making, and the Hare.” Drop in Chess: 3:30 pm. Rocke- and a parade. Co-sponsored by the gust throughout Harlem. El Museo feller Park. See Wednesday, June 1. Consulate General of Sweden. “Women on the Edge”: The del Barrio will offer art-making work- Joyce Theater, 175 Eighth Ave. at W. shops at select locations. All ages 20th Street; (212) 398–5901; http:// welcome. Thurs, June 23 Sat, June 25 www.joyce.org; 2 pm; $10. Drop in Chess: 3:30 pm. Rocke- In Manhattan Presented by the Rioult Dance In Manhattan feller Park. See Wednesday, June 1. group, this family matinee offers a “Puss in Boots”: Union Square, Make it Slow: High Line, 14th Park Ave. South and E. 15th Street; children 6 to 14 to experience the Street Passage and 10th Avenue; profound and timeless anti-war state- www.nycgovparks.org; 10:30 am to (212) 206–9922; info@thehighline. Thurs, June 30 11:30 pm; Free. ment featuring the world premiere of org; thehighline.org/activities; 10 am “Cassandra’s Curse” set to live music. In Manhattan Presented by CityParks PuppetMo- to 2p m; Free. bile this is the old tale — with a twist. Locomotive Lawn Live Concert Families learn the value of tak- Series: 10:30 am to 11:30 am. Loco- Locomotive Lawn Live Concert ing things slowly. Children create art Sun, June 26 motive Lawn. See Thursday, June 2. Series: 10:30 am to 11:30 am. Loco- using inspiration from the High Line In Manhattan motive Lawn. See Thursday, June 2. Art’s group exhibition “Wanderlust.” Arts and games: 3:30 pm. Rock- “Puss in Boots”: Bennett Park, Ft. efeller Park. See Thursday, June 2. Arts and games: 3:30 pm. Rock- River Fish Celebration: Hud- Washington Ave. and W. 183rd Av- efeller Park. See Thursday, June 2. son Piers, 125th Street and Marginal enue; cityparksfoundation.org; 2:30 Uni Project: 3:30 pm to 5:30 pm. Sara D. Roosevelt Park. See Thursday, June 2. “Despicable Me”: 3:30 pm to 5:30 pm. Sara D. Roosevelt Park. See On a boat with Laurie Thursday, June 16. Set sail for a day of great music 25, boarding begins at 10:30 am. from Laurie Berkner aboard the Tickets range from $39 to $99, Long-running Circle Line boat on June 25. plus all applicable fees. In Manhattan The musician performs a live Circle Line Cruises [Pier 83 at concert for the preschool set W. 42nd Street and the Hudson Kids Yoga: Washington Square Park, Washington Square North; and shares her Greatest Hits solo River in Hell’s Kitchen, (877) 987– www.nycgovparks.org; Wednes- album. 6487; www.ticketfly.com/purchase/ days, 10 am to 11 am, Wed, June 1 Laurie Berkner Solo on June event/1177649?utm_medium=bks]. – Wed, Aug. 31; Free with museum admission. 34 Manhattan Family • June 2016 Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar Calendar Bring the kids to a yoga class. An Drive; (212) 795–1388; Saturdays, 9 adult accompaniment must be pres- am to 9:45 am, Sat, June 4 – Sat, Aug. ent. This series of kids yoga classes is 27; Free. best for ages 2–7. Bring a yoga mat! Join in for a fun class of easy posi- Summer Sports: J Hood Wright tions, bring your own towel or yoga Recreation Center, 351 Foet Washing- mat. The ground is sloped and there ton Ave.; (212) 927–1514.; http://ny- are uneven areas, rain or wet grounds cgovparks.org; Tuesdays – Fridays, 10 will cancel the event. am – 8 pm, Now – Sat, Sept. 17; Free. Fly fishing: Bryant Park, 42nd Street Kids are welcome to learn about and Avenue of the Americas; (212) sports from skilled Parks staff! The 768–4242; www.bryantpark.org; Sat- Summer Sports Experience provides urdays, 10 am to noon, Now – Thurs, a friendly, small group introduction Sept. 1; Free. to various sports on a drop-in basis. Learn the basics of fly fishing for Staff are stationed in parks citywide. free with experienced instructors from Kids will learn sports like soccer, foot- Orris. ball, kickball and more! Summer sports: Chelsea Park, W. Street of Ships – The Port and 28th Street and 10th Avenue; www. Its People: South Street Seaport nycgovparks.org; Saturdays, 10 am to 6 Museum, 12 Fulton St.; www.south- pm, Now – Sat, Sept. 17; Free. streetseaportmuseum.org; Wednes- Kids will take part in a softball pro- days – Sundays, 11 am to 5 pm; $12 gram! They’ll learn everything there ($8 seniors, students, $6 children 6 is to know about softball and how to to 17). play. The exhibit showcases works of art and artifacts from the museum’s Macy’s story time: New-York His- permanent collections related to the torical Society, 170 Central Park West 19th-century history of the Port of at W. 77th Street; (212) 873–3400; New York. The exhibition examines nyhistory.org; Sundays, 11:30 am, Now the decisive role played by the 19th- – Sun, June 26; Free with museum Photo by Randee Daddona century Seaport at South Street — admission. long known as the “Street of Ships” All ages are welcome to join this — in securing New York’s place as special Story Time with Richard Simon, America’s largest city and its rise to Feel-good rock band Tanya Simon, and Mark Siegel, authors become the world’s busiest port by The two-time Grammy award tured into family music with his and illustrator of “Oskar and the Eight the start of the 20th century. The cen- nominee and top local talent CD Good Morning, Gus in 2000. Blessings.” After the reading the au- terpiece of the exhibition examines Brady Rymer and his band will Since then he has been wowing thors will hold a short discussion about the life and current restoration of the the inspiration behind the book, and be debuting his latest musical en- kids and their parents with fun, 1885 full-rigged sailing cargo ship the illustrator will give a brief presen- Wavertree. deavor on June 12 at City Winery. light-hearted and stomp-your-feet tation about how he began sketching The kindie rock sensation and feel good songs. “Ice Age – No Time for Nuts” New York in 1938. his band the Little Band that Press Play release party, June in 4D: Central Park Zoo, 64th Street Printmaking workshop: Museum and Fifth Avenue; (212) 439–6500; Could will be releasing its latest 12 at 11 am. Tickets are $15. of Modern Art, 11 W. 53rd St. be- centralparkzoo.com; Daily, 11 am to 4 album, Press Play. City Winery (155 Varick St. in tween Fifth and Sixth avenues; (212) pm; Now – Sun, July 31; $16.20 adults Hailing from the North Fork of the Financial District, www.citywiner 708–9400; www.moma.org; Tuesdays, ($11.40 children 3–12; $13.50 seniors). Long Island, Brady Rymer ven- y.com). Noon to 3 pm, Now – Tues, June 14; This is a fully immersive high-en- Free with admission to the museum. ergy animated film with eye-popping Participants of all ages and abilities adventure for children 6 years and Family Capoeira: Indian Road lawn, history.org; Thursdays, 3:30 pm, Now are invited to make their own mono- older. Not recommended for children Indian Road and W. 215th Street; – Thurs, June 30; Free with museum type inspired by the artist, Degas’ in- under 4. (212) 569–4112; www.nycgvparks. admission of $19 adults, $6 children novative works. The exhibit- “Edgar Juggling: Bryant Park, 42nd Street org; Wednesdays, 6:30 pm to 7:30 pm, ages 5–12. Degas: A Strange Beauty” is now on and Avenue of the Americas; (212) Now – Mon, Aug. 29; Free. Beginning cross stitchers and view. 768–4242; www.bryantpark.org; Capoeira is a unique Brazilian art younger children will learn the basic Coyote Pups: Indian Road Lawn, Mondays – Saturdays, Noon to 1 pm, form that has evolved over centuries stitch and create a bookmark with Indian Road and W. 215th Street; (212) Now – Thurs, Sept. 1; Free. into an exciting combination of mar- their new skill. More seasoned stitch- 569–4112; www.nycgovparks.org; Test your coordination and dexterity tial arts, dance, music, and acrobatics. ers and older children and adults make Tuesdays, 6 pm to 6:30 pm, Now – with free juggling lessons in the park. Some of capoeira’s benefits include a handcrafted gift for someone. Ages Wed, Aug. 31; Free. All skill levels are welcome to join in strength, flexibility, stamina, overall fit- 7 and up. Music is used as a vehicle for kids to the fun. Equipment is provided. ness, and confidence. Benefits of ca- Beginner Chess Social: Bryant learn about the world around them. Mo Willems story time: New- poeira for kids include promoting so- Hank’s energetic approach and com- cial interaction and sense of belonging, Park, 40th Street Plaza; (212) 768– York Historical Society DiMenna Chil- 4242; http://nycgovparks.org; Thurs- mitment to engage each and every dren’s History Museum, 170 Central building confidence, discipline and self child in class creates an atmosphere esteem, promoting a healthy lifestyle days, 6 pm to 8 pm, Now – Thurs, Aug. Park West at W. 77th Street; (212) 25; Free. where singing and moving become es- 873–3400; nyhistory.org; Tuesdays so children become active and healthy, sential elements of life. Hank’s inten- Rubies learn how to set up the – Fridays, 2 pm; Free with museum and develop cultural awareness and tion is to help kids and parents em- board, map out moves, and get handy admission. tolerance. Wear comfortable clothing. body the music learned in class so it tips. Come every Tuesday and listen to Cross-Stitch Circle: New-York His- can be easily translated to experiences the fanciful tales from “Elephants to torical Society, 170 Central Park West Parent and Me Yoga: Abby’s lawn out in the world. For families with kids Knuffle Bunnies.” at W. 77th Street; (212) 873–3400; ny- at Fort Tryon Park, Margaret Corbin ages infant to 6 year olds. June 2016 • Manhattan Family 35 HEALTH ID’ing a different type of food allergy

eeding your baby solids for the first time can be a nerve- F wracking time if allergies run HEALTHY in your family. New moms and dads look out for the typical allergy signs LIVING of rashes and itches when introduc- DANIELLE SULLIVAN ing new foods, but not all food allergies present the same way, and some are very difficult to diagnose. One very specific type of food allergy, food protein induced enterocolitis syndrome, affects the gastrointestinal system and can cause severe distress in babies and children. Dr. Purvi Parikh, an allergist and immunologist with Allergy and Asthma Network (www.allergyasth- manetwork.com), filled us in on this not widely known syndrome:

What exactly is it? How does it differ from a typical food allergy? Food protein induced enterocolitis syndrome is a food allergy that involves the gastrointestinal tract and leads to profound vomiting, diarrhea, lethargy, and dehydration. The child may have a low blood pressure as a result of her symptoms, and often the allergy is misdiagnosed as an infection or sepsis. This is different from typical food allergy in that there is not usually hours of feeding. Babies can also the offending allergen and usually rash, hives, or breathing abnor- take on a pale complexion from all symptoms resolve. The good malities. Also, typical food allergies dehydration. If symptoms persist news is there is a chance your child occur within an hour of eating, while more than a few days, likely it is not may outgrow it after some years, food protein induced enterocolitis an infection and is a chronic condi- but re-introduction of the food syndrome is a delayed food reaction tion that should be investigated. should be done in a supervised set- that can occur hours after ingesting ting with intravenous access in the the allergen. How is it diagnosed? event another reaction occurs. Food protein induced enterocoli- These reactions can be very se- How common is it? tis syndrome is a clinical diagnosis. vere and life threatening, so re-in- Food protein induced enterocoli- We do not have good allergy testing troduction should not be attempted tis syndrome is overall a rare dis- that is standardized for this syn- without a doctor’s guidance, prefer- ease. Exact worldwide incidence is drome since it is a delayed allergic ably, a board certified allergist or unknown, but some studies have reaction and most of our current immunologist. pointed around .35 percent incidence. allergy tests can only assess im- For more information about the But it is on the rise as all allergic and mediate allergic reactions. This is allergy, visit FPIES.org. immunologic conditions are. why clinical history is extremely Danielle Sullivan, a mom of three, is important. a writer and editor living in New York What should parents City. Sullivan also writes about pets be on the lookout for? How is it treated? and parenting for Disney’s Babble.com. Initial symptoms are vomiting, Food protein induced enterocoli- Find Sullivan on her blog, Some Puppy diarrhea, and lethargy within a few tis syndrome is treated by avoiding To Love.

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June 2016 • Manhattan Family 37 PARENTING

JUST WRITE MOM DANIELLE SULLIVAN Reaching the ninth inning of parenting ’ve been a mother now for and dog owner, but my daily sched- started all over again. That’s what more years than I’ve not been ule revolved around when I had to moms do. I a mother. While I don’t consider drop off or pick up kids, take them I suppose if I had had a single myself old yet (and still feel about 25 to a doctor or a practice, or help adult life before marriage and kids, on the inside), I know that the time in with homework or make dinner. Of I would not find this feeling so for- which my kids will need my hands- course, my youngest still has the eign, but I didn’t. I married young, on mothering is quickly drawing to dreaded teen years to get through and had my babies young, and I am a close. Back when I was 20 and my before heading to college, but it still for the first time finding out what oldest daughter was a newborn, I is a different era for me. Now if I’m it means to be me, without the uni- was a bright-eyed rookie marveling not there, each of my kids can han- form. at this new role of mother. I recall dle things themselves. Of course, I’ll always be a mother saying “my daughter” and having It’s not that I didn’t know this was and my teenage and adults kids it sound so fantastically novel. Ten coming; yet it still feels surreal. I’ve still need me, just as I need them, years later, hearing myself utter the watched countless movies with the but this third shift of parenting, words “my son” also sounded pecu- mother wondering who she is after this breezy ushering into managing liar to me after 10 years of mothering raising a family. I always thought I rather than playing is supremely two girls, but I was still so eager to would not even notice when the time satisfying. It has arrived so swiftly, learn all I could, firmly implanted in came, because I would be so thrilled and so sweetly, it feels like a TV the batter’s box. to have the long-awaited indepen- series medley in which they play a This month, that baby boy will dence that I hadn’t had since I was heartfelt tune while showing how graduate from middle school and practically a kid myself. all the characters have grown. Now head off to high school, and I am feel- It’s true, the freedom alone is it’s time for me to coach and advise, ing for the first time in 23 years that amazing. I can barely remember the knowing my players won’t always my mothering is taking a backseat days when I couldn’t shower, sleep take the advice, and that is abso- to my life. Even writing that feels bi- at night, watch my favorite show, lutely fine. I’ll never retire my num- zarre, honestly. or even read a book whenever I ber, and I’ll proudly enjoy watching For 23 years, I proudly wore the wanted. At the time, I thought those my rookies take their place in the uniform with capital MOM on the long, busy days would never end. dugout, knowing I’ll be right on the back. It was my heyday, collecting But I was so completely enthralled sidelines when they need me. runs in the form of sweet milestones, and fascinated by these little peo- Danielle Sullivan, a mom of three, is homers made up of achievements, ple that I gave it my all, and reveled a writer and editor living in New York and grand slam memories of laughs in it — even the mess. And when I City. Sullivan also writes about pets and love. was overwhelmed, I cried and con- and parenting for Disney’s Babble.com. Of course, I was also the wife and fided in friends and wrote out my Find Sullivan on her blog, Some Puppy daughter, writer and editor, friend feelings, and then recouped and To Love.

38 Manhattan Family • June 2016 Central Park & Downtown at The Mandell School at P.S. 110

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