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Episode 63: LOSE WEIGHT

This is the Become an Unstoppable Woman podcast with Lindsay Preston Episode 63, Lose Weight.

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Welcome to the Become An Unstoppable Woman podcast, the show for goal-getting, fear-facing women for kicking ass by creating change. I'm your host, Lindsay Preston. I'm a wife, mom of two, and a multi-certified life coach to women all over the world. I've lived through enough in life to know that easier doesn't always equate to better. We can't fear the fire, we must learn to become it. On this show, I'll teach you how to do just that. Join me as I challenge you to become even more of the strong, resilient, and powerful woman you were meant to be. Let's do this.

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Hey there, Miss Unstoppable. Happy to have you for this episode about losing weight. Believe it or not, I have never talked about losing weight directly in any of my podcasts, either this one or my former one Life Lovers Radio and any of my content and my courses directly. I'm just getting more and more people who are coming to me saying, "Lindsay, part of coaching is why I want to lose weight. That's one of my big goals," so I am taking these goals on and I'm helping clients make it happen.

Now, I must admit weight loss isn't something I'm super passionate about. It's not something I've overly struggled with in my life. I am just one of those people, you may hate me, but I'm just pretty naturally thin. I lucked out in the DNA pool in that way. I've always just been the same size. I really haven't had to think about weight too much. Now, when I went to college, I did gain what they call the freshmen 15 within two months of going to school. Then, of course, I gained weight with my children when I had them. I gained anywhere from 35 to 40 pounds. I can't really remember.

My daughter, I lost the weight pretty quickly because at the time I owned a dance studio and so I was very active and it just flew off of me. With my son who I had in 2018, the weight started to fly off because I was nursing to a point it was coming off so quickly that I had to change a lot of my eating habits to keep weight on. What happened is that I kept this extra weight on and changed my habits so much that I weaned him, which would have been, gosh, early 2019, then I just had all these eating habits at that point. The weight did not come off. In fact, I started gaining weight on top of that because then I wasn't nursing. www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 1

This past year has been my first chance to really figure out, "Okay, what does this whole weight loss thing look like?" Now, granted, I didn't have a huge amount to lose. It was originally 10 pounds. Then when coronavirus hit, I gained five pounds within a month, which scared the heck out of me. Recently, I have lost 10 pounds of that. I do have about five more to lose. I'm not really committed to losing those last five pounds, to be honest with you. I'm going back and forth on it because I like where I am now in some ways and in other ways I don't, which is a whole nother topic.

I've really had to figure out how this whole weight loss thing works and I'm figuring it out with clients so I've been doing a lot of learning about it. I'm going to share today in essence, the top tips on how to lose weight and I'm going to teach you some great mindsets to have, or thoughts to have about weight loss. Because what I've realized, because I don't struggle with it that much, it's just because I have not only been given pretty good DNA, but I've also been given a pretty good mindset around weights. That's why I don't really struggle with it too much because my thoughts about weight and my body have just been pretty good. It's been really weird, to be honest with you.

I'm so used to struggling with so many mindset things in my life that when it comes to weight loss, it's like, "Whoa." It feels really foreign to not be like, "Yes, I've always been in this boat with you and here we go." Today is really going to open your eyes in regards to how simple at the end of the day weight loss can be. I know for some of you, you're already like "Get me out of this episode. She says it's simple," but really at the end of the day, it really is simple.

This is why a lot of times too when I'm working with clients and weight loss isn't even on their radar, they end up just starting to lose weight because once you figure out the mindset behind what's holding you back, a lot of times, the way that we do one thing is how we do many things and so when you change one thought, and then you change many thoughts as we do in coaching because we're just constantly analyzing thoughts and changing them, then all of a sudden, you just snowball into all of these areas of your life-changing because you have changed as a person.

As I said, this isn't something I'm super passionate about and really when it comes to weight loss, even for women who I know have struggled with it, I do become somewhat passionate about it there because I hate hearing that women just constantly think about this and that it's a constant problem for some women because there's a quote out there, it's from the comedian, Sarah Silverman. She says, "Mother Teresa didn't walk around complaining about her thighs. She just got to work."

I think about, "Gosh, if just, everybody did not have to worry about their weight anymore, what we could create as a society, especially as women--" Because we are just flooded with so many societal images about being thin and about looking a certain www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 2

way over and over and over again and so when you're flooded with those images, then, of course, it's just on the forefront of your mind over and over and over and over again. I hate that. It drives me crazy that women have to live that way because I just don't want them to have to suffer in that way. I don't think it's necessary.

I would love to see so much more for them beyond something that's their weight. Even if their weight has gotten to a point where it's impacting their health, then I start to get even more passionate because I'm like, "Oh, we've got to get you to this place where you're really healthy so that you can get rid of some of your health issues and just be at a place where you are your best self." Because of course, I'm all about someone being their best self.

Again, when it comes to weight loss, it's like, "Let's get this over with. Let's figure out whatever we need to figure out in your mind to make this a one and done thing and you never have to worry about this again." Because again, there's just so much more you could do with your life, so much more you could give back to in our society than worrying about the way that you look and how you weigh. It frustrates me that so many women have to go through this and I would love for every woman out there to never have to worry about this again.

That's why I'm putting this episode out there. That's my why, is if this episode shifts you in a way where you just start to lose the weight and you permanently lose the weight and then it's one and done for you, you never have to worry about it again, awesome. That would be amazing, wouldn't it? To never have to think about your weight again. Gosh, I just know for me, as I said this past year or so, I've had this ongoing thought of, "Okay, you got to lose the 10 pounds." Then it became, "Okay, you got to lose these 15 pounds." That just took a brain space that didn't need to happen.

Now that that's gone and I'm not even thinking about that anymore, I'm getting that brain space back even more to create things like two podcasts a week for you and give more to my clients and give more to my family and just be able to enjoy my life more versus thinking about the way that I look. It just is so much better on the other side of this. What I'm going to teach you today, I must admit some of the stuff is going to be uncomfortable for you. It's going to take work and the first few weeks especially are uncomfortable. They just are.

Anytime we're changing our habits, it's uncomfortable. The big thing that I want you to walk away with from this is that you can do hard things and you can get uncomfortable. I used to really hate discomfort. I didn't realize that discomfort was part of the game of change. I thought there was something wrong with me because I felt uncomfortable. I didn't even know really what I was feeling to recognize it as this comfort. www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 3

I did an episode once on the show called Growth’s Discomfort. It was one of the very first episodes I did on this podcast. I encourage you to listen to it. I really just talked about, again, like every time we're growing, it's going to be uncomfortable, no matter what. We're usually uncomfortable with where we're at anyway so why not just get uncomfortable and grow and change?

Because I know when I was carrying around that extra weight, it just felt uncomfortable. I was still trying to fit into my old clothes post-baby, and I didn't really fit into them and I just felt like, "Ugh." The way I would describe it is like an overstuffed sausage. I just felt like somebody put just a little bit too meat in the casing. I know that's gross, but that's how he felt. I was tired of it. I was over it. Two, I couldn't find enough motivation to finally knock it out of the park and get this done. It wasn't until I was introduced-- I had already been introduced to Brooke Castillo from Life Coach School, but to her weight loss stuff. That was how she started as a coach was a weight loss coach. She had been overeating. Then I believe she went somewhere and got certified in it and then now has developed her own process. Then she certifies coaches through the Life Coach School to be weight loss coaches as well, as just general coaches in general.

I'm not certified through her but I did learn her strategies or just the basic ones at least to lose the weight. That's really what I'm going to teach you today. This is stuff she puts out there freely, so I totally credit her for that. I'm not taking any of her paid content and making it free. Again, all praise hands for Brooke Castillo and figuring this out. This is just like as I keep saying not my zone of genius, not something I'm passionate about but this stuff works, my friend.

The first thing as I said is just prepare yourself, it's going to be uncomfortable. It just is. Our habits are changing and so we're going to have to get uncomfortable in that process. The big thing too that I want to ensure that you're doing is that you're not losing weight because you feel like you should. We talked about this on just a recent episode of the show, it's Words to Delete. It was two episodes ago I believe, episode 62.

Oh, just one episode ago actually. I talked about how any time you're thinking or you're saying, "Oh I should do blah, blah, blah," so in this case, "I should lose weight," that's a big sign that you're just doing it to people-please. Since our society is so heavily focused on everybody being thin especially women and that's the standard of beauty many times, then you can really feel that pressure, right?

If you're saying that to yourself, catch yourself and say, "Is this something I really want to do? Do I really want to lose weight? Why is it that I really want to lose weight?" For me, I could still somewhat fit in my old clothes and I wear a size four. I know you may www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 4

hate me for that because I know that's one of the sizes many people attain to. Again, I'm sorry. [chuckles] I don't know how I got good DNA and some of the stuff.

Anyways, I just kept thinking, "Well, maybe I just need to move up to a size six." Maybe that's just the way it is now and the way to go and a size six it's not that bad. I can move up that way. Then I really thought, "Okay, why is it that I want to lose weight?" Well, I want to lose weight because A, I really like my clothes, the way they are. I don't really want to buy new clothes either. I also just loved being that weight that I was before. It just felt like home to me.

Granted I could make a new home with my new weight, but I just really loved being the old weight better. I just felt more like myself. Now that I'm on the other side of that and I'm back near the weight that I started before I had my son as I said within 5 pounds, I just have so much more energy. I do, I just feel just so much better. I am just so glad that I took the time though to figure out, "Okay, what is it that I really want here?"

For a lot of people, when they do sit and dig deeper, they may realize A, okay, this is just the shared goal. I don't need to fit into any beauty standard, like give the middle finger to society in that sense. If I were somebody who could carry weight well, I would totally be heavier. I think curvy girls are beautiful. If you've heard some of my stories about when I was growing up, I wanted to be curvy so bad. I was just real thin and I wished to have curvy breasts and curvy hips which I did end up getting but I just have never had the breasts. When I gained weight, it's just like all bottom-heavy. It does not go to my breasts at all. I don't carry it well, but for other women, they carry it so well.

Well, of course, is just in a mindset, right? If you carry it well and that's how you feel about it, great. To me, I just didn't like the way that I carried it, and granted I could change my mindset around it. I just was like, "No, I'm just going to lose the weight. That's really what I want more." Again, as you're sitting down and figuring out, "Okay, why is it that I want to lose the weight?" For a lot of people, their reasons why are things like beauty. They just want to look hot. They want to feel hot and they want to do it for themselves. It makes them feel better about themselves.

I have a client right now who was talking about her getting healthier and stuff. She's like, "Lindsay, is it weird that I just want to look hot?" I'm like, "No, that's not weird at all." When I work out, that's the one thing that keeps me going throughout the whole workout. Most times I'm like, "I'm going to get F out of here. I don't want to do this anymore." I just keep thinking, I'm like, "Okay think about how you're going to feel when you wear this outfit or you're going to do this thing and all of that stuff." That's what keeps me motivated and keeps me in the game to keep going and keep showing up for the workouts and doing things like changing my eating habits. www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 5

For other people, they're really wanting to improve their physical health. They may be at a point where their health is starting to have an impact, like they're heading down a diabetes path. I've had some clients like that. They have other issues with breathing or heart. They're getting to a point of like, "Whoa, I cannot continue on this path anymore." They see the progression of it too sometimes in their parents of, "I see the way they're living and I don't want to live that way." That can be a really big why for them.

For some people, it's energy. It's like I just don't have the energy to do all the things that I want to do. I think about one family member of mine who wants to lose weight and that's her big why is, "I just don't have the energy anymore that I used to. There are so many people and things that I want to have energy for when I'm around them." That's her big why.

Then another big why for a lot of people is their mental health. When you have extra weight, it impacts your mental health. We talked about on the podcast and especially in my coaching process this negative inner voice called the inner mean girl and how she can come in and really beat you up about things. I know for me when I was carrying that extra weight every time I put something on, it didn't fit right. There was that inner mean girl, "Oh, Lindsay, gosh, just lose the weight. La, la, la, la, that looks so gross." Just in my ear.

Now that I've lost the weight, she's not as much in my ear. I too could have done mindset work around that and said, "Okay, I want to stay this weight, let me control my inner mean girl and her thoughts." I had a bigger reason as to why I wanted to lose the weight versus not. I hope that makes sense because we don't want to just be like, "Oh, I just want to diminish that inner mean girl voice, but I still too want to be the weight am at." You can totally diminish that inner mean girl voice if you want to being the weight that you're at today if that's what you choose. For me, it just was like, "Oh, I just want to lose some weight anyway. Let me just do it."

Know your why. That's really important not just for this goal, but for any goal. Really go in-depth of what your why is like, why is it that you want to feel beautiful? Well, I want to feel beautiful because in my life, I want to be able to fully experience it. When I'm in those moments just be able to take pictures and to light in the way that I look, and to light with my family and friends.

I want to be physically healthy too so that when we go and we do these things, I can go and I can hike, and I can go ride bikes, and I can go play tennis. When I just envisioned my overall life and what I want to do for the rest of my life, a lot of that includes physical activity. I need to be in my tip-top shape for that. That's a huge why for me. For your energy. Energy was another life for me. I want to be energetic. I want to have energy to do all the things that I want to do. I feel like two part of my big why is you www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 6

and my clients. I'm showing up in the best version of me and having energy to give as much as I can to you so that you can improve your life. I need to be taking care of myself on a high level to be able to give that to you.

All right, so you know your why, right? The next thing I want you to do before we get into this strategy tips of losing weight is to imagine your future self with that weight loss. For me, it was, "Okay, how do I feel when I've lost these 10 to 15 pounds?" Well, my clothes just fit better with ease. Something I intentionally envisioned was I knew I had an upcoming photo shoot for my business and it was, gosh, I think about a month and a half away at the time I decided, "Okay, no more BS-ing around, Lindsay. Lose thefreaking weight."

I thought about that photoshoot and I knew there was a dress that I had purchased to wear for that photoshoot. I even pictured I was going to be wearing it outside and I envisioned how I was going to look in that dress and how it's going to feel in that dress. That really fueled me to say, "No more, lose the freaking weight." This is a great exercise for you too is think about your future self in that weight. What is she doing? How is she feeling? What is she thinking about especially you now and starting this journey, she's likely pretty kind to you.

A lot of times our future self is like, "Come on, just do it, you can do this, you can do hard things. Start today. I'm going to--" and she's so grateful. When your future self is talking to yourself today, it's like, "Thank you so much for making these changes, and for in essence, changing the habits, and I know it was so uncomfortable, but look at where we are today, and it was so worth it. Thank you. Thank you, thank you so much. Now, we get to go do all these other things with our lives instead of sitting around thinking about our weight all the time and having to worry about this and suffer with this."

That's something that really fueled me. That was really like the missing piece for me of what I needed to get my booty in action and get motivated to lose the weight was thinking about my future self because I just kept thinking about today. I was like, "Oh, but I feel uncomfortable today." Especially after the coronavirus, hit I was like, "Oh." It feels good to go out and get a cupcake or go out and have ice cream because part of the day is uncomfortable with my kids at home all the time.

At the time, the coronavirus felt really scary, and it felt like there was so much uncertainty, and so just having those little hits of that endorphin of a sugary sweet or something else allowed me to take the edge off. Then imagining my future self and thinking, "Okay, I've got to look good for this photoshoot, you don't have to, but I really wanted to because I knew these are pics that I was going to use in my business for www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 7

many years to come." I wanted to be able to look at this picture and be like, "Yes, this represents the best of me."

Okay, so think about what that is for you, and you may have a bigger weight loss that needs to happen. I've had clients 50, 60 pounds, maybe even bigger than that, like 100 pounds or more, and so think again, about, "Okay, where am I when I'm at that weight, and what am I thinking? What am I feeling? What am I saying to my present self now, in order to just really get your mind thinking about beyond today and the potential discomfort of what these next few weeks they're going to bring."

Because, again, it's only just a few weeks, like you have a really long life ahead of you likely. It's just a short few weeks in your life, and you may be like, "Lindsay, I have tried so many different things to lose weight, and I'll start it, and I'll get uncomfortable, and I don't get habits of it. Then I'll fall off the wagon, and then I have to go do it again, and dadadada."

What I'm going to teach you today will hopefully start to knock that pattern off for you, and instead of just finally commit to this, move forward with it. Again, never have to think about it again, because this was going to be a lifestyle change. Okay, a lot of people think, "Oh, I'm just going to do this certain diet." No, this is a lifestyle change that you're going to make today, okay?

All right, so now let's talk strategy, and how you're actually going to do this. The first thing that you need to do is you need to plan out your meals a day prior. Now you can plan out more than a day prior, I encourage you just to do a day prior because you may need to adjust here and there. The day before you sit down and you say, "Okay, here's what I'm going to eat tomorrow," and you stick to that plan no matter what. Okay? No matter what comes up, you're sticking to that plan. Here's why.

First reason is you need to start making decisions from your logical brain when it comes to food versus your emotional brain. Right now, your emotions are likely in the forefront, and they have taken control over the way that you're eating. This is why you have been overeating. Again, raising my hand here, I have been there with you, my friend. We got to get it back to where the thinking brain is in control of how you're eating. The way you're going to do this is plan those meals a day prior.

This is the biggest strategy of all. It doesn't really even matter what the meals are, per se. If you just want to start with planning your meals a day prior, great because this is-- Again, you're just going to have to start doing this every single day. It's not that you just do this until you lose the weight, this is just what you start to do.

Now, you may need to be really specific with your plan at first and say, "Okay, I'm going to meal prep and I'm just going to eat this and this for breakfast, this and this for lunch www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 8

and this and this for dinner." For me, I have just gotten to a place where I just say, "Okay, for lunch, I'm eating this much amount of meats and this much veggies. For dinner, I am eating a serving size of whatever we're having for that meal." Then I have started intermittent fasting, which we'll talk about in a minute. I typically don't eat breakfast, and then I just eat--I mean, I just drink water or drink sparkling water.

Now there are days when I'm like, "Okay--" Like, for example, this past weekend, I had a night alone with my husband. We haven't had a night alone in three years, it was so awesome. I planned on there, "Okay, I'm going to have one alcoholic beverage," because I haven't had alcohol in a really long time. If you heard that cutting alcohol podcast, I just don't crave it at all. I thought, "Okay, well, let me try alcohol." I planned to have one alcoholic drink on there.

Two, I didn't know everything that we're going to have at the restaurant that we were staying at with the hotel. Again, I just was like, "Okay, I'm just going to have steak and veggies, and then just a little bit of carbs on the side." My plan now is pretty loose, but when I first started this, it was pretty tight of like, "Okay, the next day, I'm going to get this, this, and this, and then I'm going to have this and this for dinner," so I can get in that habit of really sticking to my plan.

Now, on the day of if you get to a spot where you're like, "Man, I really want a cupcake today," or "I really want to have a little bit of chips, but it's not on my plan," you cannot have it, my friend. Now granted, you are a freewill person, you're a grown person, you can do whatever you want, but that means you're starting to break the promise to yourself, your emotional brain taking control again, and that's the big piece of this is that your logical brain is in the forefront.

Two, you're starting to build a relationship with yourself and your future self to say, "Hey, I trust you, I got you. I can do these hard things," versus if you just give in to the urge or the desire, then you start to break a trust with yourself. What's going to happen is then the next day, you might not trust yourself as much and that inner mean girl voice starts to come in your ear and is like, "Well, you did it yesterday, why don't you just do it today?"

It's that whole angel, devil thing we see sometimes in TV shows, that little devil voice, "Come on, you ate that cupcake yesterday. Just eat it today." Then your future self is kind of sitting there like, "Oh, man, I don't know, if she's going to make it. I don't know, she starts to doubt you." Then you start to distance yourself from your future self because you don't want to see her because then again, it just like spirals, this negative thinking, so stick to the plan, my friend.

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What you can do instead, if you really want that cupcake, great, put it on the plan for tomorrow, just save it, pack it up, put it on the plan the next day. It may feel restrictive at first, and it may feel like you're depriving yourself at first, but I promise you and a few days, if not a few weeks, you're going to be like, "Man, this is awesome. This is so great," because, as I said earlier in the show, how we do one thing is how we do many things.

For me, I've realized, "Man, if I set my mind to something, I can do anything." I can control my emotions so much more now and not give into different urges, be it food or something else, that when it hits me of like, "Oh, I really want to do this and take the edge off of the way that I'm feeling," I'm like, "No, I have done so many hard things these past few months, and especially my whole lifetime, but in the past few months to control this, I can get through this. It's just a feeling that I'm feeling right now."

That's the next tip I want to give you is when you're planning this, it's going to feel really uncomfortable at first, it's going to feel again like you're really constraining, your brain is probably going to tell you that you're starving and to just as you do. Give into certain things and all that stuff. The goal of this is to really start to feel your feelings because that's why you're overeating, to begin with, is you're trying to avoid some feelings inside of you and you're getting that little hit of endorphins by eating something. Then what happens is you get the hit for a few seconds, and then it's done. Then what? You feel like crap, right? Then you're like, "Why did I do that? Why did I eat that?" Then it just feels like extra weight on your back now.

Instead, we've got to do is like, "Oh, okay, I'm feeling really stressed right now. I'm feeling really anxious. I'm feeling really sad. Whatever it is you're feeling, I'm going to link a feelings chart in this episode show notes, by the way, if you really need to figure out what it is you're feeling. It's the feeling that I get my clients, it's really good. You're going to be able to sit down and say, "Okay, what is it that I'm feeling?" because it's really important for you to recognize what that feeling is, and say, "Okay, I'm just feeling really stressed right now," and just feel the feeling of that.

Now, if you're a client of mine, you've got more tools here. You can do things like journaling, you know how to journal. You've got things like the Unstoppable Woman coaching process, where we go feel, deal, and heal, you can go and do hyper events. I mean, you are set up for major success in regards to feeling but if you're not in those yet, first, just recognize what it is you're feeling and just allow the vibration to go through your body. You can pull out a pen and paper and start to journal and just say, "I feel anxious because--" and let all those thoughts out on paper. "I feel sad because dadadada," whatever it is.

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That's really the key here, is you've got to learn how to feel your feelings and process your emotions instead of avoid and turn to something like food to make you feel better. That's the work, my friend. If you can do that on your own, great, awesome. If you can't do that on your own-- I know sure as hell I couldn't have done it on my own, it is a hard ass work. Our brain is naturally wired to avoid emotion, it does not want to feel pain and that's where you may need to hire a coach like me to help you finally feel the stuff and two, you're likely repeating the feelings of time and time again of things from your past that you just need to get rid of.

You may think it's like, "Oh my boss triggered this in me." Or, "This thing happened, my car got hit or the coronavirus or my kids or whatever." You think it's those things that are triggering you and making you feel those emotions but it's likely so much deeper than that, it's likely things that happen from your childhood that you just haven't been able to feel, deal, and heal and process in a right way. Once you do that, these other things that come up in your daily life are just not going to trigger you anymore.

They're just not because the reason you were triggered, to begin with, was something so long ago that was just retriggering, in essence, poking at the pain of what you used to have. We call them bullet holes in my coaching process. You have these things that happen to you, it's like somebody shot at you, you have this big wound and we just cover it with a band-aid and we're just like, "I'm good. I'm moving on." The reality is we have to go in there and we have to do the work to heal that stuff.

That's the goal here is that you're feeling the feelings and you're not turning to food because you got your plan and you're like, "This is all I can eat today so I can't get that little hit of endorphin from a food, instead I'm just going to feel my feeling."

Now, Brooke Castillo teaches something called an urge jar where she has just a basic glass jar, you can see through it and she has these little beads. What you do is you take a bead and you put it in the jar every time you feel an urge, you collect 100 beads in this jar and you can start to see like, "Wow, look at what I've done. I have, in essence, not given into these urges, and now look, I've done this 100 times, my whole jar is full." It just builds this momentum in you.

I did not use an urge jar personally, I don't feel like I needed it. Her clients really love it and she just raves about it's something with the brain and how the brain loves the urge jar. You may need to add that. You can, again, just get a clear jar, get some beads and put those beads inside of it and every time you feel an urge, you just go and you put a bead in there. If you're on the go and you get an urge and you don't give into it, just take a bead and move it from one pocket of your purse to another pocket and then when you get home put them on your urge jar. You're going to just start to see like, "Wow, look at how many times I controlled myself." www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 11

Now, the other thing I want you to consider when you're making your plan is cutting sugar, flour, and alcohol and starting intermittent fasting. Now, you may be already like, "Whoa Lindsay, no way, not doing it." Let me tell you, I love sugar or I loved sugar. Every meal I was like, "Okay, what's the sweet treat I'm getting at the end?" When people would tell me they were going to cut sugar, I would think, "Why in the hell would you do that?" That is one of my greatest joys of my life, I love sugar, I love it so much.

When I started this plan that I'm teaching you now and I started this the very first day of June of 2020, this year just a few months ago, Brooke had taught this, cut flour and sugar and do intermittent fasting. Here's why. She's like, "Sugar and flour really messes with your hunger cues and it allows you to not be able to taste food fully and so in essence what you do is like you stuffed this food in your mouth and you don't really know when you're hungry, when you're not hungry. We just really don't really need sugar and flour in our life that much."

I trusted Brooke enough to say, "Okay, I'm going to try this and just see how I feel." I thought it was going to be so hard, I thought I was going to crave sugar, I thought I was going to have withdrawals. Let me tell you, granted, those first few days I felt really, really hungry because I had just been used to overeating in essence but I started to feel amazing. I started to have so much energy and when I would put something sugary or something with more flour on my plan for the next day of like, "Tomorrow, I'm going to have a cookie or maybe I'm going to have some pasta or whatever," I started not to like it and I started to see how it was weighing me down.

It reminded me of my alcohol experience. I just stopped craving it so much and when I would have it, it'd be like, "This isn't as good as what I thought." Brooke was right, it messed with my hunger cues, it made me think I was more hungry than what I was because sugar too is dehydrating. When you're dehydrated sometimes, you want to eat more, and again with the flour stuff and I just started drinking more water and I just was like, "Man, I've never had this much energy in my entire life and I have more on my plate now than ever before."

I was like, "This is amazing." I am a convert now. Now, granted there are days I still have sugar. Like today was the day I had sugar, I had some Trolls fruit snacks which I know is not-- Lindsay, why would you cave for something like that? I would rather have something like a fruit snack or a sour candy but I eat so much less. Most days, I don't have any sugar or flour at all and I don't feel deprived anymore. In essence, I feel even better and I look forward to the days when I don't have sugar and flour to be honest with you because A, that shows that I've meal planned pretty well.

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I don't really prep food that much, I just think, "Okay, what foods do I need to buy at the grocery store or what foods am I going to buy takeout wise?" Most days I would love to just eat no sugar and flour, some days it's just not always feasible because I just haven't found as many options that have no sugar or flour, and two, I'm not looking at the ingredients of foods and be like, "Does this have sugar in it?" I'm just intentionally not choosing sugary sweets, is what I'm meaning by that.

Just consider that. I've had some clients that I've already told this to and they're like, "No way, Lindsay, not doing it because what's going to happen is then I'm going to go back to it and I'm going to want to binge on it." I'm like, "Maybe but I'm just telling you is that on the other side of this, it is pretty freaking good. Just think about it." Two, it doesn't mean you have to fully cut it from your life and never have it ever again, just most days of the week as you're making your plan. I just encourage you to not intentionally put sugar or flour or alcohol on that plan and you're just going to start to see as you have it less and less, you may find, like me, the former sugarholic, the former I love carbs, the former alcohol is awesome, why would anyone want to cut it being like, "I don't really like this stuff anymore."

I'm telling you. It is so weird for me that some days I'm even like, "Who the hell are you, Lindsay Preston? Who are you that you are not eating sugar and drinking alcohol and not wanting a bunch of carbs?" It's been so weird to not be in that place anymore, so weird but I feel so freaking good. That's like, "Oh my gosh, of course, I'm going to do this. Why would I not?" Because I feel so amazing not putting that stuff in my body. Just think about it, okay?

The other thing I want to add here is as I keep saying, the first few days are going to be really uncomfortable. I remember the first few days I felt like I was going to die almost, that I was going to die of hunger and I still had the cravings like, "Oh my God, I just want a cupcake." Or, "Oh my gosh, I just want to go get ice cream."

I felt like I was depriving myself but then I realized within a few days is that oh my gosh, I'm still alive, and not only am I still alive, I'm starting to feel a lot better, I'm starting to have more energy. How is this working? How is it that I'm eating less but I have more energy? Because before I wouldn't have energy and so I think, "Well, I just need food to make me feel more energetic," and it became this whole cycle of not having energy again.

Again, those first few days were so uncomfortable, I was a little bit hangry, I felt like I was going to die, and then my body got used to it and then I was like, "Oh my gosh, I have so much more energy. Let me keep doing this." Now, I do want to back up and talk about the intermittent fasting, this is again something Brooke taught. For me, I've www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 13

always kind of done that, I don't eat after 6:30 PM my time. I just don't ever do that, I don't like eating later at night. I feel gross when I do it.

Then I would eat breakfast and I would usually turn to something really sugary right out the gate like a muffin or maybe a sugary cereal. I'm talking in Lucky Charms. Not even a little bit sugary- and I would just eat the straight marshmallows, pretty much of it. When I'm telling you all, "I used to be a sugar addict," I am not effing around, total sugar addict. There are days that I still do that, I'll be like, "Tomorrow, I'm going to have this little chocolate chip muffin in the morning." Most days I do not have breakfast.

Again, I'm not the expert here at this, I'm working with some of my clients who are about to finish their nutrition training and I hope to have them on the show here soon. They're going to be working with some of my clients trying to lose weight because I just don't know all the research behind it but I just know it's worked really well for me. I know a lot of people rave about it. I just don't really eat between 6:30 PM and 11 AM. I do eat lunch right at 11 am, I am ready for lunch.

Typically too, I wake up in the mornings and then I get my daughter to school and then I come home and my son and I go for a walk. That's the next point I want to make is I'm not doing hardcore workouts at this current plan of how I'm eating right now. This is why again is like a why I want to bring a nutritionist onto my team to really talk through person by person with people of how much they need to be eating per day if they're going to be working out and stuff because I just know right now where I'm at, what I'm eating is it's not enough per se to be doing hardcore workouts.

I do walk every day. I am up and about with my son, a lot. I've really figured out how much food I need to eat for that and too, those first few weeks when you're starting this new plan, it's stressful on your body and it's stressful in your mind, and it's just an added stress to have a workout in there especially when again that's hardcore. If you're doing something gentle like walking and yoga, things of that sort, you could fit in there, but do not do anything really really hardcore in there beyond something gentle like that because otherwise your body's just going to be in so much stress and that's where your body's just not going to be able to take it and you're likely- your emotions are going to be so high that you're just going to have to turn to food. You're not going to have to but you're going to really really want to and you likely will have a problem with that.

Again, this is what Brooke teaches, she talks about not working out. My clients right now, they're not really trusting me on this plan because they're like, "Okay, Lindsay, this is new stuff that's coming out of your mouth." Before when they say they'd lose weight, I'd say, "Okay, cool, we're going to talk about all the mindset stuff but then you got to go get the weight loss stuff somewhere else." www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 14

Now I'm really committed on saying, "Hey, here's really the plan that I want you to follow, how do you feel about that?" Some of them are like, "Yes, I don't know, Lindsay." I'm like, "Listen, Brooke Castillo teaches this stuff, she teaches hundreds if not 1000s of coaches and stuff, this stuff works and it's worked for me, and it works for all the people around me that I've seen in her stuff and her program, so the stuff works, okay?"

The big thing too that this plan is going to offer you is it's really going to cut out the decisions you have to make each day because you're going to make the food decision the day prior if not even farther than that if you plan out week-long meal plans or whatever. You're going to have more decision-making ability in the day. We talked about this sometimes on the show of decision fatigue and sometimes we just have so many decisions.

How many times, especially if you're a mom, your kids are coming to you, "What are we eating? What are we eating?" or "I'm hungry, I'm hungry." Or even just yourself with like, "Oh, I'm hungry again, damn it. What am I going to do for this meal?" If you just have some plan the day prior, it's like, "Oh, okay, I'm just going to have chicken and veggies," or "I already know what I'm planned out because I'm going to get this takeout and order this thing there." It just allows you to get that off your plate.

The other thing is it's going to cut out your mental focus on your weight. We talked about this earlier in the show of just you're spending so much brainpower on your weight and weight loss. I would just love to get that off that plate for you so you can start thinking about other things, and other goals that you have. Maybe it's where you want to uplevel your career or find new love or improve your relationships, or give back to your community. I don't know but I just feel there's so many things that you could be thinking about beyond weight loss and what you're eating every day.

Don't you agree? Every time I get in these patterns of I'm thinking about my weight or my body or how I look and stuff, I just think in my head with like, "No, we have other things to do." It goes back to that quote I started with Sarah Silverman where she said, "Mother Teresa wasn't thinking about her thighs, she had work to do." What is it? It was that she has shit to do, right?

It's like you do too, you have so many other things in our lives. Let's get this off your plate. Yes, it's going to be uncomfortable, yes, you're going to have to feel your feelings, that's the worst part of it because you're going to freaking love being able to think about other things. You're going to freaking love having more energy, you're going to freaking love the weight loss.

I do want to tell you this is there are going to be days when you don't lose weight. There may even be weeks when you don't lose weight. There may be even times as www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 15

you're on this plan, where you gain weight because there were times for me, or fluctuates. It fluctuates all the time. You're going to get on your scale likely and you're going to weigh yourself. Do not freak out.

Do not allow that number to have any power over you because so many times you will get on that scale and it's like, "I've gained weight," or "I'm this number," or whatever. It's just a number my friend, just tell yourself that. It's just a number. When your brain starts to tell you things like, "I'm suffering for little results, it's not working, I can't do this," calm it down. It's just a feeling you're just having a thought.

If your thought is, "I can't do this, it's too hard." Recognize that's just a thought. What's the feeling? Oh, defeated, overwhelmed, whatever. That's just a feeling, it goes back to the self-coaching model tool that I've taught you on many other episodes. Your thoughts create your feelings, your feelings then create your actions, your actions create your results.

It all starts with the circumstance that triggers it, so the circumstance is you get on the scale, you see a number that maybe you don't like. Then the next thing happens is the thoughts. "I can't do this, this is too hard, I'm suffering for no reason." Recognize your thoughts for what it is, and then ask yourself, are these thoughts serving me? Then they're creating these feelings of overwhelm, discontent, whatever, sadness.

What is it that I need to think that it's- to serve me? This is working, it's just not happening the way that I want it to, everything's happening for a reason, I got this. This is just a number on the scale. Those are just thoughts I'm offering you here. When I would see a number that would go up on this scale-- Because what happened is, in June, I started losing weight pretty quickly and then we went out of town for a week, we went to Colorado and I didn't plan my meals as much as tightly. It was just like, "Okay, I'll eat a little bit more of this." I had some alcohol. I came back and I think I had gained like two or three pounds.

What had happened is I'd lost eight. Now, it was like, back up so I'd only lost five. I just thought, "You know what, it's just a number, I've lost it, just a few weeks ago. I can lose it again, no big deal. No big deal, all right. No big deal, I got this." Because I'm not thinking about this as like, "Oh, this is a one-time thing, and I'm really suffering in this process." I'm thinking, "This is just the way I'm going to live now and this process is enjoyable," that's how I'm choosing to think about it because I truly do believe it's enjoyable. I truly do.

I'm not just saying that to F around with you, it is truly enjoyable to cut sugar and flour and alcohol for my life. It may not be for you at first and it may not be for you long term, either. We may be different, I don't know, but what is really enjoyable is knowing www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 16

that you've got your own back and knowing that you can do anything you put your mind to and knowing that all you need to do is just have your thinking brain in the driver's seat and the way to do that is just plan your meals the day before. That's it.

That is it. That's just so mind-blowing to realize that you can do that. Then you're just going to live this way and whatever. If you need to do mindset work around that to be like, "Well, I don't like planning my meals before," and you have feelings about that, that's totally cool. Nothing's gone wrong, you can have feelings about it, maybe in your journal about it. Maybe you need to come in my free online community, just go to lindsayepreston.com/community talk about your feelings, we'll coach through it because it's important if you're feeling certain feelings about planning your meals beforehand that we talk that out. It's okay to feel that way.

For me, I've really enjoyed it believe it or not, and again I don't highly plan out my day before. That would be really constrictive to me. What works for me is I'm going to plan enough. I just know for lunch I'm going to probably have meats and veggies, and for dinner, I'm going to have whenever we have for our meal service because we get HelloFresh. I intentionally choose meals for my family that will work within what I want to eat.

Sometimes there's little carbs in there, sometimes there's a little sugar there, I'm okay with that. I just know the day prior I'm going to mentally somewhat plan out my meals. I'm just going to drink water, and that's totally cool and if I want to have something else another day, I'll plan it for the next day, no big deal because I see the benefit of it and I see how it's flowing over into other areas of my life.

Things with my business is like, "I can do hard things, I got this." Things with my family, "I can do hard things. I'm going to have that hard conversation with my husband, I'm going to talk to so and so." Even the way that I'm coaching has changed. I have so many harder conversations with clients now it's like, "Hey, you realize your block is dadadadada." Before, I maybe leaned away from that a little bit and try and stay a little bit fluffier. Now, it's just to the point with a lot of love, of course, but to the point and so they're getting better results. Everything in my life has just started to snowball in the direction of my dreams and a lot of it goes to implementing some of the stuff.

The last thing I want to tell you here is love yourself now, love the journey and commit to the journey. Right now, you may not totally love yourself. You may not like the way your body feels, but why not just love yourself now? If you're going to love yourself now, then as you start to lose the weight, guess what? You're just going to love yourself even more. What have you got to lose?

Brooke Castillo talks about this thing where she gets in front of the mirror naked, and she just starts to say really loving thoughts to herself. Everything that comes up negative is like, "Oh my God, look at your butt", or "Look at this. Look at your breasts or your stomach," or whatever. Just hear it all, and then be like, "I am--" Maybe you don't have to say like, "I love myself." Maybe you're not there yet, but you can be like, "This is a body. Here's a human body. Hello, human body. There you are."

I have to do that sometimes about my breasts. You guys know. I'm not crazy about my breasts, especially now post-nursing. I had great nursing breasts. Now, bleh. [chuckles] You can tell some of the negative thoughts I have about that. I'm just like, "Oh. Those are breasts. Those are post-nursing breasts. There they are. Hello, breasts." There you go. It calms those negative thoughts.

Now as I'm losing the weight or lost some of the weight, and some days, I look a little better. I'm like, "Oh, this is awesome," but I love myself too when I don't look as awesome. I love the journey too. I love that I get to do this stuff. I love that I get to plan my meal ahead of time. It's not suffering. It's not restrictive to me. It's a joy because this is leading me to the direction of my dreams, and I believe in it so much. Even on the days where maybe I gained a pound or something. I carry more fluid than I want to.

I realize around my period, I look even more bloated. I carry more fluid. You can see it on the scale. I'm not crazy about that, but I'm just like, "I'm trusting the journey. It'll all come off. I'll get to my ideal weight. I'll get there." That's why right now I'm not even connected to a number of what my ideal weight is. I'm going to figure it out. I'm going to find it when I find it, right?

That's what I have for you on weight loss, my friends. I hope you have some takeaways of what you're going to implement in your life here. Just know if you're a client of mine, we're going to go even deeper in this, especially over in my Living the Dream program, which now is in the last three months of my coaching process. If you're in my coaching process now, you may be in Authentically Awesome or Become an Unstoppable Woman, where we end up is Living the Dream, and we get even deeper into weight loss there. We get deeper into money stuff. We get into all these advanced trainings, but I did want to create a podcast for two reasons.

First of all, those clients of mine who are trying to lose weight now, I'm like, "Oh, I just really want one resource to give them." I want to do that. Two, I wanted to do for non- clients, who want to lose weight, and they're just sick of the diet culture. They really want the mindset behind it, and they want some strategies to lose weight now. As I keep saying, they don't have to think about this shit anymore. I'm so freaking tired of hearing women spend so much brainpower on their bodies and all that. We are meant www.LindsayEPreston.com | © Lindsay E Preston Coaching LLC 18

for so much more, my friends, than our bodies and what we look like. I know it is important in some ways.

Granted, I am somebody who likes to feel really beautiful, not really beautiful, but I like to feel pretty. I don't want to spend my time on this, and I don't want you to spend your time on this. Let's just knock this out. Let's get this done. Do the work that you need to do to get there, and then let's think about bigger and better things for your life, like how you're going to give back, and how you're going to feel really deep fulfillment, and how you're going to create all the things you're dreaming of, instead of thinking about your weight. Okay?

Hopefully, this episode helped you. If it did, share it with a friend, who may need to hear it too. Feel free to go leave a review for the show wherever you listen to your podcasts. I will see you in just a few more days, next Wednesday, so in just two days for the next episode of the show. I'll talk to you then. Bye.

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Hey there, Miss Unstoppable. Thanks so much for tuning into this episode. If you enjoyed it, share it with a friend. Send them a picture of this episode via text, via email, share it on social media, I'm sure they would be so appreciative to know these strategies and tips on how to accomplish your dreams. If you are ready to guarantee you're going to accomplish your goals and dreams, then it's time to start coaching with me.

In my nine-month simple success coaching system, I am going to walk you every single step of the way to ensure that you get the goals and dreams that you want. The first step is to apply for a free 60-minute consult call. Just go to LindsayEpreston.com/apply to get started. As always, my friend, remember, you're only as unstoppable as you believe you can be, so believe in yourself. You got this.