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Partner Sexual Abuse & Stalking: Considerations and Critiques

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Partner Sexual Abuse & Stalking: Considerations and Critiques Measuring Partner Sexual abuse & Stalking: Considerations and Critiques TK Logan, Ph.D. University of Kentucky Department of Behavioral Science Center on Drug and Alcohol Research [email protected] Partner Sexual Abuse • Are the full range of compelled sex acts challenged when it is between intimate partners? – Sexual abuse continues to be separated from the narrative of abuse/coercive control – We need to fully understand, conceptualize, measure, and communicate the ways in which women in violent relationships have been forced to live. 1. Cultural myths and norms – Real rape, “private” matter • I told nobody. That’s private, we don’t talk about our sex life and nobody I know does either. 2. Sexual intimacy – Marriage = consent, Static versus fluid consent, expectations of wifely duty 3. Coercive control – is the cornerstone of partner violence but we do not understand the unique role sexual abuse plays in coercive control “To go from that level of fighting where he had his hands around my throat to him kissing me and having sex with me; that was completely foreign to me. I had never been in that situation. And it ended up okay in the end but it still haunted me the next day…to me that’s not making love. I don’t know what that was. Or that he would feel hate for me one moment but try to show love [the next moment]. That’s a hard one. I don’t know how to relate to that even to this day.” Measurement of sexual violence vs. physical violence • Physical abuse has primarily been the “gold standard” for defining abuse – Does only considering the “physical” component of the act ignore the deeper level harm? • Categorical measurement? – A slap regardless of harm, is unwanted and non- consensual – Being called dumb and fat regardless of harm is unwanted and non-consensual • Sexual acts, however, may be more complex – Sex acts in one context may not be abusive in another context. – offender’s intent and victim’s interpretation of the acts and the harm they caused. The impact of certain coercion tactics are especially harmful because they are confusing, embarrassing, and creates increased self-blame – Pain that comes from within is greater than pain that comes from outside of oneself – Choices? • “He had this thing - this way of taking things away from me, punishing me if he didn’t get sex. He would punish me by taking my keys to my car so that I couldn’t go anywhere or taking my car and you know leaving his without the keys or, taking the kids to his mother’s instead of me keeping them, yeah, punishment.” – Consider the confusion SUMMARY OF SHORTCOMINGS 1. General sexual violence research • Rates over time 2. Partner violence research • Comparisons with other forms of abuse • Burden and effort limitations 3. Non-forced sexual coercion research Clearly define and explain it! • Terms for sexual violence – Rape – Wife rape Rates vary – Sexual assault Defined different – Sexual abuse No comparing – Sexual aggression across – Sexual coercion studies – Unwanted sexual contact 1. Over-reliance on narrow and dichotomous yes/no representations of sexual violence experiences; • Has your partner ever threatened or forced you to make you have sex? • What are we equating with measures and analysis? “Equating unwanted sex or coercion (or attempted rape) with forced sex may diminish the trauma of those that are harmed and may silence the voices of those that do not experience trauma from their unwanted or coerced sexual experiences” (Gavey, 1999) 2. Inadequate description of the full scope and nature of partner sexual violence (context); • Sexual specific degradation • Incapacitation and humiliation • Drug and alcohol • Common but differ for facilitated everyone • Sex while sleeping • Most believe these tactics are used to deliberately • Sex under difficult hurt, punish and control medical circumstances • Implicit threat • Nature (beyond yes/no) • Afraid to say no (after a • Frequency fight, never a choice), • Severity • verbal pressure and • Duration coercion, • Recency • Resistance strategies •Trajectory 3. Difficulties in discriminating unwanted from non-consensual sexual activities; and, Wanted Consensual YES NO YES Consensual Not always clear: e.g., Sex while sleeping, sex while intoxicated NO Not always clear: Rape e.g., Verbal coercion, Sex after an argument Wanted Consensual YES NO YES Consensual Not always clear: e.g., Starts Sex while sleeping, sex while intoxicated NO Not always clear: Rape e.g., Verbal coercion, Ends Sex after an argument 4. Limited information about the role sexual abuse plays in the larger context of coercive control. • Entrapment, • Cumulative fear and harm, • Coping, Resistance strategies • Safety and danger (lethality), and •Outcomes Summary: Make sexual abuse part of the narrative 1. Break the silence – By systematically documenting, acknowledging, questioning, and addressing the scope and nature of partner sexual violence 2. Move beyond dichotomizing sexual violence – A dichotomy cannot and does not begin to capture the level of terror and bodily incapacity experienced during sexual violence 3. Better understand the role of sexual violence in coercive control – Partner sexual violence must be viewed as having its own role within the larger context of coercive control. Stalking Stalking is a course of conduct directed at a specific person that induces fear and/or concern for safety Measurement • Questions and definitions • Not asked as often vary • Explicit threats – Expected and typical • Implicit threats tactics list • Technology – Repeated • Impact on life – Ask about how long (2- • Risk is bigger weeks) than physical – Ask about fear assault – Ask about attack or assault (BJS, 2009) Course of Conduct Tactics Versus Strategies A stalkers imagination begins where ours ends SLII Strategies (purpose of the tactics) Interfere by *Surveillance* Life Invasion Intimidation Sabotage/ Attack • Follow • Unwanted contact • Threats • Financial & work •Watch at home, work, • Property sabotage •Wait and other places damage • Ruining reputation • Show up • Phone calls • Forced • Witness • Tracking • Property invasion confrontations intimidation software • Public humiliation • Threaten or • Custody • Obtain • Harass friends actually harm interference information and family self • Kidnapping/ about target • Threats to detaining • Proxy stalking target about • Road rage harming others • Physical/sexual attack • Attack friends and family Duration (DIF) Patterns Intensity Frequency & of approach escalation Impact: “Reasonable” Fear “Normal” Obsessive courtship Relational Stalking or break- Pursuit up pursuit Life Violence Sabotage Cumulative Fear Harassment Persistence/ & harm of escalation others Explicit and Implicit Threats • Types of threats • Context of threats – Violence, reputation, others – Proxy stalking – Guns, other weapons – Prior history of abuse and violence • Characteristics of threats – Patterns • Victim resistance and • Escalation, Upcoming stalker persistence triggers – Violence ideation (detailed, graphic) • Outcomes of threats – Responses Cumulative harm • Direct impact – Life changes • $$, time, extraordinary effort – Level of fear, distress, concern • Tangible losses – Cost of property damage – Costs for safety measures – Medical care – Time off work – Court appearances/attorneys Qualitative harms and losses Day-to-day impact Opportunity Social Personal costs Costs costs Employment, Health Reputation financial, Mental health Social educational, Financial Relationships Opportunities Summary 1. Stalking behaviors are varied, complex, and dynamic 2. Fear accumulates over time rather than based on a stalking incident 3. Stalking harm is bigger than violence and harm accumulates over time – Acknowledge the larger harms and suffering .
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