NCEA Level 3 English (90724) 2010 Page 1 of 7

NCEA Level 3 English (90724) 2010 — page 1 of 6

Assessment Schedule – 2009 English: Read and respond critically to unfamiliar prose and poetry texts (90724) Evidence Statement Text A: “A Winter’s Tale” Q Achievement Achievement with Merit Achievement with Excellence ONE Identifies and gives an example Identifies and gives an example Identifies and gives an example of at least ONE valid language of at least ONE valid language of at least ONE valid language technique from lines 1–17 technique from lines 1–17 technique from lines 1–17 AND AND AND Makes a relevant comment Presents a valid and detailed Presents an integrated about how the technique relates discussion of how the discussion of the links between to the rest of the passage. technique relates to the rest of the technique(s) and the rest of the passage. the passage. There may be more than one There will be a sense that reference point, and the connections are being made discussion will provide more across the passage. detail

Examples of language techniques Technique Example Simile  “stars in the sky … resembling frost on the blade of an axe” (line 1) Alliteration  “It’s brisk, bristly and bright” (line 4)  “startling skyscapes” (line 16) Metaphor  “diamonds are glinting in the snow on my back lawn” (line 5)  “my stringy frame” (line 7)  “I live in a tiny house, a shoebox” (line 11)  “snow-draped and pleated slopes” (line 13)  “wonderful mammoth” (line 15) Colloquialism  “hunkering down” (line 11)

Comments / discussion may include link(s) between the chosen example and the idea of:  the harshness of environment  the relationship between man and nature (eg hard life teaches man hard lessons)  man’s recognition of beauty of his environment, despite its harshness  recognition of the size / scale of the environment and man’s smallness by comparison  the need for man to respect his environment  the writer’s negative attitude to others who do not share his appreciation of the environment  Recognition of the ‘ordinariness’ of man in contrast to the beauty of nature  man’s spiritual connection to the land  the writer’s belief that those who live in such rural areas understand the essential nature of things NCEA Level 3 English (90724) 2010 — page 2 of 6

Q Achievement Achievement with Merit Achievement with Excellence TWO Identifies a conclusion Identifies a conclusion Identifies a conclusion AND AND Identifies and gives examples of Identifies and gives examples of at at least TWO techniques at at least TWO techniques from lines 18–33 which convey from lines 18–33 which convey the writer’s point. the writer’s point. AND AND AND Makes a relevant comment Presents a valid and detailed Presents, with support from the about at least ONE technique. discussion of how at least ONE text, an integrated discussion technique is used to convey the of the links between at least point. TWO techniques and the conclusion. There will be a sense that connections are being made across the second half of the passage. Possible conclusions include:  the hardships of winter, in a hostile and inhospitable environment, remind the writer of what really matters  ‘the basics’, like warmth and a sense of community, are what is really important in life  self-reliance helps create a resilience of spirit  those who do not understand the writer’s choice of lifestyle are themselves petty and delusional  winter is beautiful but harsh, and teaches us something. Examples of language techniques include: Spoken language features / conversational  Allow a sense of personal engagement / language enjoyment  contractions, abbreviations, use of personal  Reinforce the writer’s view of the world pronoun ( “I’m”, “I”)  Attempt to persuade others of the writer’s views  colloquialisms (“yap”, “whingeing”) Diction  Makes the writer’s thoughts more forceful – he  formal, almost legal language (“apprehend”, has the weight of the law behind him “entitlements”, “ One” Quotations and allusions  Links to other literary figures show that the  Yeats, Thoreau writer wants to be taken as seriously as them

Neologism / compound words  Reinforces the reflective and / or the  (“rational-itis”, “we-will-do-betters”, ”self- persuasive aspect delusion”)  Reinforces the mocking / sarcastic tone Abstract nouns / negative emotive words  Reinforces the mocking / sarcastic tone  (“vanity”, “self-delusion”, “pretension”,  Encourages the reader to accept the writer’s “affectation”) view of the world NCEA Level 3 English (90724) 2010 — page 3 of 6

Text B: “Autumn” Q Achievement Achievement with Merit Achievement with Excellence THREE Identifies a mood in lines 1–6 Identifies a mood in lines 1–6 Identifies a mood in lines 1–6 AND AND AND Begins to explain an effect Presents a valid and detailed Presents an integrated supported by relevant discussion of the effect discussion of the effect(s) example(s) created, supported by relevant created, supported by relevant examples. examples. There will be a sense that connections are being made across the poem. Examples of moods: Negativity / hopelessness  shown by diction / word choice, eg “ fruitlessly”, “barren”, “cold”, “sunless”  negativity also reinforced by strong verbs / words of action, eg “fall”, “arms grip”, “haul”

Coldness and rejection - shown by diction / word choice, eg “fruitlessly”, “barren”, “cold”, “sunless”

Sadness / melancholy  shown by images, eg the tree is barren; the poet’s love will bear no fruit; autumn is linked to a “patient” – references to “pain” and “old pain”; “worn art” suggest tiredness / dejection

Familiarity and resignation  shown by personification of tree, eg “once more in love”  also by diction, eg “sad reminiscence”, “age-worn friends”, “rediscovering”

Nostalgia  the tree is trying to hold onto the warmth of autumn – remembering better times The explanation of effects may include:  how the writer uses language to create a mood  how the mood helps to tell us what the poet feels and why  how the writer uses the poem’s mood to create a response in the reader about the poem’s subject- matter / theme / ideas

Examples of effects:  An idea is created by the mood - the poet is pessimistic about the onset of autumn: none of the benefits of the approach of autumn (autumn harvest, colours of leaves, etc) are contemplated - autumn is unwelcoming - a realisation that halting or changing the passing of the seasons is impossible – humankind is powerless in the face of nature - realisation of the natural cycle of the seasons  Image(s), in the sense of visualisations, are created by the mood - reminds the reader of a cold winter's day - makes the reader think of the misery of old age  An emotional reaction / response is inspired by mood - eg sympathy for poet / tree NCEA Level 3 English (90724) 2010 — page 4 of 6

Q Achievement Achievement with Merit Achievement with Excellence FOUR Identifies and gives an example Identifies and gives an example Identifies and gives an example of an idea about the onset of of an idea about the onset of of an idea about the onset of autumn from lines 12–14 autumn from lines 12–14 autumn from lines 12–14 AND AND AND Makes a relevant comment that Presents a valid and detailed Presents an integrated attempts to explain the idea. discussion of the idea. discussion of the idea(s) conveyed in lines 12–14. There will be a sense that connections are being made across lines 12–14. There may also be a sense that connections are being made across the whole poem. Ideas may include:  The poet recognises his powerlessness in the face of nature (“I am nothing”)  The coldness / barrenness of autumn makes the poet feel like a rejected / bereaved lover (“retread the mashed grass that my first forays made”)  The poet dreads the onset of winter (“wish only to hide in the ignorance of sleep”)  The poet feels bereft – there is no external force which cares about his life (“The awareness grows that I am nothing to her”)  The repeated personification of the tree (“I am nothing to her”) may suggest that the poet’s relationship with autumn may be a metaphor for a failed relationship in his life  The “ignorance of sleep” may suggest that he wishes to depart life  The “ignorance of sleep” suggests a childlike perspective; sleep will make it go away and he will not have to think about it in sleep  The onset of autumn is predictable and cyclical (“I retread the mashed grass” – just as he has done many times before). NCEA Level 3 English (90724) 2010 — page 5 of 6

Comparison of Texts A and B Q Achievement Achievement with Merit Achievement with Excellence FIVE Identifies at least ONE aspect of Identifies and gives an example Identifies and gives an example each writer’s attitude to their of at least ONE aspect of each of at least ONE aspect of each season writer’s attitude to their season writer’s attitude to their season AND AND AND Refers to each text to exemplify Presents a valid and detailed Presents an integrated each writer’s attitude to their discussion which compares discussion which compares season. and / or contrasts each writer’s and / or contrasts each writer’s There may be some attempt to attitude to their season attitude to their season compare and / or contrast the The focus may be on the texts in some way attitudes and how they shape the texts. There may be some explicit or There may be some explicit or implicit reference to language implicit reference to language techniques. techniques. There may be some unevenness in the discussion of the two texts. ‘Comparing and contrasting’ implies that candidates will be writing about similarities and differences in the writers’ attitudes to their respective seasons. Examples given may have been used in previous responses. Text A Text B  Has a positive view of winter – there are sharp  Has a negative view of autumn. images, cruelty even, but also beauty.  Embraces the challenges the season poses.  Searches desperately for remnants of the previous season, “hoping for warmth”.  Sees winter as a natural part of life to be  Takes autumn as a personal affront. accepted.  Appreciates the lessons learned, is thankful for  Sees humankind as inconsequential in relation this. to nature, compared with the writer of Text A, who has learned.  Creates positive images, even though the  Sees only ugliness (“barren”, “cold”, “sunless”) – landscape is harsh and challenging; describes no acknowledgment of any beauty. things of beauty with a painter’s eye.  Explicitly located in New Zealand – place names  No locality mentioned – is not obviously a New given. Zealand landscape. NCEA Level 3 English (90724) 2010 — page 6 of 6

Q Achievement Achievement with Merit Achievement with Excellence SIX Identifies and gives an example Identifies and gives an example Identifies and gives an example of at a stylistic feature from of at a stylistic feature from of at a stylistic feature from each text each text each text AND AND AND Refers to each text to show Presents a valid and detailed Presents an integrated how the stylistic features convey discussion which compares discussion that compares a sense of season. and / or contrasts how the and / or contrasts how the There may be some attempt to writers use stylistic features to writers use stylistic features to compare and / or contrast the convey a sense of season. convey a sense of season. texts in some way. There may be some unevenness in the discussion of the two texts. Comparison of stylistic features could include:  both texts use figurative language  both texts use a personal voice  both texts use concrete diction (“possum socks”, “woollen beanies”, “singlet” / “hook-grass”, “wilding bulbs”, “loam”  both texts use language from the field of nature (“mountains”, skyscapes” / “bulbs”, “loam”)  both texts use alliteration to create sense images (“brisk, bristly and bright” / “fruitlessly I fall”)

Contrast of stylistic features could include:  Writer A uses metaphor; Writer B uses personification  Writer A uses allusion to other writers to support the point that despite its challenges, winter is beautiful  Writer B makes extensive use of connotation; uses richer qualifiers (“barren”, “mashed”, ”sunless”)  Writer A uses a wider landscape than Writer B  Writer A uses place-names to talk about the season in a particular locale  Writer A uses more denotative language to create a stronger sense of place and feeling for the season

Judgement Statement There are 2 texts and 6 questions. All 6 questions offer opportunities for Achievement, Achievement with Merit, or Achievement with Excellence. Achievement Achievement with Merit Achievement with Excellence Reads and responds critically to Reads and responds critically and Reads and responds critically and ideas and language features. analytically to ideas and language with sustained perception to ideas features. and language features. 3 A 2 M + 1 A 1 E + 2 A