Ghost Man on Third Newsletter

Ghost Man On Third Newsletter

DC Hill – Summer ‘09

Issue #4 Greetings kickballers… Don’t forget! Please send in your recaps, photos, “missed connections,” poems, jokes and anything else you’d like to see in the next issue of GMOT. Send it to [email protected] by Friday night and look for it in Monday morning’s edition! Thanks for participating and happy reading!

I. Standings & Scores:

DC Hill - Kickball Standings Rank Color / Team W L T PTS RF RA RD

1 Afternoon Delight 4 0 0 12 25 5 20 2 Green Death 3 0 1 10 20 6 14

3 WAKA Me Off 3 0 1 10 17 10 7

4 Multiple Scoregasms 1 2 1 4 7 11 -4

5 Logan Circle Legends 1 2 1 4 9 16 -7

6 Kick In A Box 1 3 0 3 13 26 -13

7 The Regulators 0 3 1 1 7 15 -8

8 Team Sledgehammer 0 3 1 1 7 16 -9

DC Hill - Flip Cup Standings Rank Color / Team W L

1 Afternoon Delight 20 8 2 The Regulators 18 10

3 WAKA Me Off 17 11

4 Green Death 15 13

5 Kick In A Box 13 15

6 Logan Circle Legends 12 16

7 Multiple Scoregasms 11 17

8 Team Sledgehammer 6 22 Field 6:30 PM

1 Green Death (11 - 2) Kick In A Box 2 Team Sledgehammer (3 - 7) WAKA Me Off

Field 7:15 PM

1 Logan Circle Legends (2 - 6) Afternoon Delight 2 The Regulators (0 - 3) Multiple Scoregasms

II. League News & Notes:

Royal Board Members: King: Mike Malloy (Green Death) Queen: Jenny Larsen (Green Death) Duchess of Social Engagements: Grace Webster (Afternoon Delight) Baroness of the GMOT Newsletter: Katie Orme (Afternoon Delight) Sir Kyle of the Gentry: Kyle Keller (Afternoon Delight) Chancellor of Scores and Schedules: Renato Macedo (Afternoon Delight)

If you have any questions, concerns, comments, suggestions, or photos you would like us to put up on the website, please feel free to contact us at the league e-mail: [email protected]

League Parties: Mid-Season Party: Saturday, September 12th Location: Rumors (www.rumorsrestaurant.com) Details: Coming Soon...

End-of-Season Party: Saturday, October 3rd Location: Public Bar (www.publicbardc.com) Details: Coming Soon...

III. Team Recaps:

Afternoon Delight

The Game:

This week matched us up against a familiar foe from our spring season from the DC Constitution Division, the Logan Circle Legend (formerly known as Just Dance!). After going winless in the previous season, LCL had a total overhaul and recruited some 5-star recruits for the new season. Being that they stole our team color from last season, it was only fair that we teach them that just because you dress like us, doesn't mean you will be able to play as well as us. With much trash talk leading up to the game, our team came out focused. With Jeff "Brett Favre" Allard making his glorious comeback out of retirement, we picked up right where we left off last week with a great all-around 6-2 victory in the rain. Some highlights/lowlights from the game: Joe K and Joe R for each having a big swing and a miss while at the plate, Eric's pop up, then walking off the field, them dropping it, and still tagging first base and getting him out (that's the first thing you learn, always run it out to first base), Kyle's sprinting catch in the outfield, Grace's over-the- should catch at 2nd, Katie going 2 for 2, and Clare getting nailed by the ball at shortstop (you should have caught it, haha). Again, another solid performance all around, with 6 runs on offense and only allowing 2.

The Bar:

Luckily this week, we had 3 people drive, so everyone was able to get a ride to the bar from the game (not that it's that far of a walk). Once all the regular patrons left that back area and we got the flip cup table all set up and ready to go, we were able to get our official game underway. This might have been one of the biggest games of flip cup yet with both teams coming with a ton of people to the bar. Luckily, we were able to come up on top again with a smooth 5-2 victory. With the music playing loudly for the entire time, we were even able to get a cupid shuffle in there and some "line-dancing" in honor of Jeffers. While most of us left around 10:45, Kris showed up and held down the fort with Bernie and Joe R until the last metro train which of course lead to Bernie's gchat staus this morning of "hangovers are awesome....not!"

A side note, it is worth mentioning that this morning as I was walking to the metro, I see an Afternoon Delight team member in full kickball gear doing what can only be described as a "WAKA Shame." There was only one thing I could do: laugh out loud and smile, then give this individual a high five and continue on my way to work.

Funny conversation of the night:

While playing flip cup towards the end of the night.... Me: You guys are short one player, someone is going to have to go twice... Bruce: I'll go twice! Me: Oh way I think Jeff is going twice. Bruce: Jeff sucks! Me: Jeff, you hear that? Bruce said you suck. Jeff: (with no hesitation) Actually I swallow... Me: Clare, can I get a confirmation on that? Clare: Fuck you!

Quote of the night:

Bruce: Kyle didn't do anything, I caught one of his balls and a girl caught the other! (That's what she said) A poetic contribution, to be read to the tune of Dr. Seuss’s literary masterpiece “Green Eggs and Ham”: I would not, could not, on the mall I could not, would not, munt the ball I will not drop the pop fly I will not leave my solo cup dry I will not black out at the bar I will not flip my cup too far I do not want to wake up drunk In someone else’s kickball junk I don’t dislike kickball shenans’ I don’t dislike them, Stamm-I-am

*And finally, a HUGE shout out to the magnificent Joe R who, in a moment of athletic infamy, fractured his wrist in multiple places. Not only did he continue to play in the game, but he also played a vital role in ensuring our victory on the flip-cup table as well. In fact, he was one of the last kickballers at the bar, closing it down, like a true champion. Joe R, we raise our glasses and salute you…

Green Death

Brian, sent at 12:14am:

Team newsletter/recap/whateveritiscalled

Absolutely cannot exist without a recap of what happened between some talkative mofo on the black team and a few of yours truelies who included Kevin, Mitch, and molloy.

When the 3 on 3 rumble of who can shine in the bottom line was tossed out, like so many salads by the black team, three men, nay perhaps immortals answered the call.

Those Titans were in fact Mitch, Kevin, and Molloy. Not to be intimidated by height ( one of these guys was like Jorge mureson (or however he spells his name)) these unalterably upstarts agreed to some sort of game called flip cup. A game all had played before, but that none considered their best feature. (Mitch's was in reality his smile, Kevin's his razor sharp wit, Brian's his leaping ability).

All was set for an epic battle...until the flip cup turned into an allegory for what 100 million years of asteroids have done to the moon. The moon (black team) is old and while I might write a poem about them, does nothing, while asteroids kinda destroy the moon. Kinda means every time and with fail. Numbers cannot quantify what happened completely, but if you understand a billion and zero, you can sort of get the idea.

If you thought the GREEN DEATH beat down of whoever we played was bad, you need a new definition of beat down. I was just on entertainment weekly and it turns out Inglorious Bastards is a loosely interpreted reenactment of what happened tonight. The part of Brad Pitt ( who is the mustachioed fool) was supposed to represent all the best features of Kevin, Mitch, and Brian. Brad admitted he as never failed more awfully in his acting career.

I love you all. but let's tighten up the flip cup

Miles:

Wow. I'm finally done reading that, and I still have no idea what I missed.

If you shattered the "moon", then why do we need to tighten up?

Best line: "like so many salads by the black team"

Or perhaps I can't read at this early hour (combined with the fact the recap was written after a night out). In a million years, have asteroids done nothing to the moon? Did you guys lose 3 cups to none? The suspense is killing me.

Kevin:

I'm fluent in drunk ramble, allow me to interpret:

1) The 3 of us embarrassed the guys on the black team, including multiple 3-0 victories. 2) The beat down was so bad that the black team quit even though there was additional beer to play with. 3) Brian likes Mitch's smile. 4) Brian reads the gossip sites when he is wasted. 5) GREEN DEATH

Kick In A Box

A haiku to start off:

The game was so bad We wanted to walk into Oncoming traffic

Game Summary: Painful/Embarrassing

Highlight of the game: Austin taking out the first basemen and Claire's birthday (yeah, that's all we've got)

Blooper of the game: Our play Flip cup: In the only highlight of what was a miserable kickball night, the ex-Pandas exacted some revenge on the flip cup table with a rousing 5-2 victory over Green Death. You may kick harder, run faster, throw more accurately, catch better, and wear gayer socks, but we can flip a small cup over faster...so yeah!

III. Next Week’s Games:

Week 4 - August 18th

Squatting: WAKA Me Off Equipment: Afternoon Delight

Early Games (6:30 pm): Field 1: Green Death vs. Kick In A Box Field 2: Team Sledgehammer vs. WAKA Me Off

Late Games (7:15 pm): Field 1: Logan Circle Legends vs. Afternoon Delight Field 2: The Regulators vs. Multiple Scoregasms Pictures of the Week:

WAKA Me Off is up to bat!

Team Sledgehammer Logan Circle Legends

All love for Multiple Scoregasms Kick In A Box redeems themselves against Green Death

Cupid Shuffle makes a comeback!!

Again, please send whatever material you’d like (the more awkward the better), to [email protected]. See you on Tuesday!