To: Professor Musselman

To: Professor Musselman From: Lauren Motto Date: November 7th, 2012 Subject: Shailja Modi's Unit 3 Article

Summary: The author explains the similarities and differences between individuals suffering from schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. The author discusses not only the structure of the brain, but symptoms and treatments for these diseases as well. It can be hard to diagnose an individual when several of the characteristics of these disorders overlap, but the author shows how the main differences are large enough to be seen and understood during diagnosis.

Major Points: The author did an excellent job making her article look like a Wikipedia article. Appropriate sections and subsections were used, the sizing of each section is standard to make the article look cohesive, and she mentioned how she will be including inward links. The author does not provided enough citations for the standard of Wikipedia. For example, there is not a single citation in the sections on Grey Matter and Treatment. It may be beneficial for the author to look for other sources outside the ones used in her literature review. Wikipedia does not require for all sources to be scholarly articles, instead as long as they are reputable they can be used. By adding more sources the author will have a stronger paper for both what is written now and what will be changed. One question I have is are there any symptoms exclusive to each disease? The author groups the two together a lot and it would be beneficial to possibly explain some of the key differences between the diseases. Going off of that, it would be useful to the audience if a short description of each disease was provided. Although the author will be most likely linking the terms to another Wikipedia article, a single sentence explaining each disease would be helpful.

Minor Points: In the opening section there does not need to be a break, instead it can be one paragraph. The article was very engaging throughout, but at times some of the phrasing could be awkward. For instance the last sentence in the Hallucinations section did not sound right when reading it. Finally, the reference numbers should come after the punctuation.