Matt S Internet Dating Rules

MATT’S INTERNET DATING RULES

You must exercise EXTREME CAUTION when meeting ANYONE on the NET.

I Personally Feel That Internet Dating Is For The Birds And Is Not Safe!!! You Should Meet People In The Flesh Elsewhere, Like On A Christian Cruise, At Church Singles Functions, Etc. It’s 3 Dimentional and Better! You can Talk and See that person and get to know them in a Non pressured Atmosphere around a lot of other Christians! These Rules are for your Protection In the event that you do decide to venture out and date people from the internet. Pray!!! Before doing ANYTHING and SEEK GOD’s WILL! a. when chatting with someone only reveal your email address when you feel comfortable doing so. If things work out great, but if not you can always BLOCK THEM to avoid any future emails. b. when you do finally agree to call and speak with someone, call HIM/HER, so your privacy is protected, Unless they have called ID. Call your Operator and ask them how to BLOCK your number when you make a call your number will be BLOCKED. If you get a msg like this one, then you KNOW they have Caller ID; “This caller does Not wish to accept Callers that block their number”. If you still wish to call this person and do not care about them getting your number, you will have to call your operator and ask them how to temporarily REMOVE the Call Blocking Feature. c. NEVER give your last name, town you live in, place of work, or friends or relatives names and addresses out. (Unless U feel comfortable about doing so, or have know the person for at least 4 weeks or longer). d. when you do finally agree to meet someone, meet them DURING THE DAY if at all possible, in a PUBLIC PLACE. e. when you are going to the PUBLIC PLACE park far enough away so you can get away back to your car if things get WEIRD. You also are parking far enough away so the other person CANNOT see the make and model and license plate of the car that you are driving. Anyone who gets the make, model and license plate of your car can report you for a hit and run accident in order to have the police release your address to this total stranger, most police depts DON’T BUT some do. EXERCISE CAUTION AT ALL TIMES!!!. f. after your meeting let him/her leave 1st, the LAST thing you want to do is walk ALONE back to your car. If he/she never saw you get out of the car, he will have no idea how to stalk you, or what direction to go in. This way you are safer leaving the PUBLIC PLACE. g. if at all possible, have the manager or another person at the place you met WALK WITH YOU BACK TO YOUR CAR. You should Lock ALL your doors IMMEDIATELY after getting into your car and it is a GOOD IDEA to wait 10-15 minutes to make sure the other person has left before proceeding home. This way they CANNOT follow you. h. always tell someone WHERE you are going, and tell them approx. what time you think you will be home. AGREE to call them when you arrive home at a PRESET TIME, or from say 9:00 pm to 9:15 or so, a range and also AGREE to have your friend call the police if you do not call by That time. Give your friend(s) the following info; MATT’S INTERNET DATING RULES (cont.)

1. The PUBLIC PLACE you are meeting 2. The approx length of time that the meeting will last 3. The make, model, color and license plate number of your car 4. The phone number of the public place you are meeting 5. What Color and type of clothing you were wearing, and other identifiable birthmarks, or scars, jewelry etc 6. A copy of a recent picture of yourself should be given to your friend(s) to aide in looking for you in case you are kidnapped, or God forbid anything else. i. when paying for your drink or meal, make sure that the other person CANNOT see personal license, id cards, or ss card to help IDENTIFY YOU. j. if you feel your encounter went well, great!, but if the person acts suspicious or made you feel uncomfortable, remember the clothing he/she was wearing, and car they were driving if you can see it, and report it IMMEDIATELY TO THE POLICE. k. if your date will not leave to go back to his/her car after you said goodnight, get the mgr of the establishment to escort you to your car, and tell the mgr to report him to the police, since they acted suspiciously. l. what signs are abnormal? Here are a few to look for; a. obsessive talk about sex b. obsessive talk about wanting to get you alone somewhere c. constant calls to you or your work place (Remember never give out these phone numbers out unless you are sure and feel comfortable about the person, you should have a good idea!) d. remarks that are not normal i.e. what positions do you like, do you like bondage, are you a lesbian, when can I fill your teeth...ANY ABNORMAL SEXUALLY EXPLICIT TALK AND COMMENTS should be your Red Flag that goes up and WARN you that this person is NOT NORMAL!!!! Any remarks like this shows you the person may be a SEXUAL PREDATOR, and you need to have the mgr escort you to the car ASAP...GET OUT and GET AWAY!!! e. dwelling on how beautiful you are and staring at you all the time. f. constantly IN YOUR FACE (Bothering you) calling, emailing, writing, stopping by UNANNOUNCED should give you a RED FLAG that something is wrong g. lastly offering you expensive jewelry, gifts or money when you haven’t known them that long h. USE YOUR INTUITION AND YOUR HEAD!!! Many people put themselves in DANGEROUS positions, when they NEED NOT do that! Follow the rules I have set forth, and you will have a MUCH BETTER time dating people off the web! MATT’S INTERNET DATING RULES (cont.) m. If you are a woman in a hurry to marry because your biological clock is ticking and you want to have a baby, or if you are a man and wanting to start a family for the same reason. You are getting old and are afraid that you may not be able to have children or start a family STOP!!!!! The worst thing in the world to do is RUSH INTO A RELATIONSHIP just for the sake of having a child or start a family because the relationship is BASED on a reason and not true love or God’s Timing!!! n. dating someone or eventually marrying them because they have money is also a relationship based upon a LIE. This relationship cannot function for long after the truth is made known, and the TRUTH WILL be known in time. o. dating or getting involved with someone who is NOT a Christian or a religion that is close to yours is asking for FAILURE. The reason is if you cannot relate to your friend, mate, or possible life partner on a religious level, How can you relate to them on other levels? p. language barriers: Communication is essential and if the person you end up meeting is NOT understanding what you mean or say because of language barriers and/or they speak in their own language other than ENGLISH BETTER than they speak and understand ENGLISH, look OUT! UNLESS you plan on having an NTERPRETTER living with you so you can communicate DON’T stay in a relationship based upon touchy feely, they look cute, or are a warm body as a reason to stay with them!. If you have problems now they will only get WORSE after you marry them. q. Finally, The worst thing to do is apply pressure to the other person and FORCE them to make a decision that you both may regret the rest of your lives. If people are INTERFERRING and telling you how you should date, who you should date, and why aren’t you married? tell them kindly, Please leave me alone, it is my business, I don’t tell you how to run YOUR life, Please don’t tell me HOW to run mine.

REMEMBER - ANYONE CAN LOOK LIKE ANYTHING THEY WANT ON THE WEB since it is 1 DIMENSIONAL!...THERE ARE NO FEELINGS - NO EMOTIONS - NO BODY LANGUAGE - LOTS OF LYING - LOTS OF PEOPLE WHO ARE EITHER GAY, MARRIED, OR SAY THEY ARE SOMETHING ABOUT THEMSELVES THAT THEY AREN'T!!!!!

Everyone can paint a pretty picture UNTIL you see and meet them and find out what they are REALLY LIKE!

Does this mean TRUST NO ONE?

A: Absolutely NOT, I am saying that there are alot of strange people on the net, but there also are some nice people too. :) Just exercise CAUTION at 1st, and PRAY to God for Guidance, he will lead you the RIGHT WAY! Web Do's and Don't When Meeting Someone Online

Write a letter to a stranger and it’s called "communication." If you reveal some personal tidbits of your life, that’s called "getting connected." If you are single, there’s a chance that some magic may even happen. When you talk with a cyberbuddy about your boy/girlfriend’s lack of passion and inability to make you happy that’s crossing the line from entertaining chit-chat into the restricted zone.

No matter where you start, remember that the person you meet in a chat room or discussion group may not be who they say they are. Wiry, articulate, cultured Damien’s email or chat session written to you turns out to actually be composed by his younger sister, the English lit whiz. The fact that he regularly dines on doughnuts and little else is not mentioned. Oops.

That’s the obvious case. There are also those who mean well but "misperceive" who they see in the bathroom mirror. Some folks are clearly looking for love on-screen; others are just looking for a way to amuse themselves — perhaps at your expense. Don’t fling yourself into the flat land of the monitor, hoping that all will translate well into three dimensions. THERE IS ONLY ONE DIMENSION ON THE WEB!!!!

Some do’s and don’t’s: Move slowly. Relationships — including the online kind — build on previous exchanges. If you are in a rush to fall in love by tomorrow, you will make gross judgment errors today. Do not pack your overnight bag and skip to Another State or Country after two chats with Wilhelm. He might easily be Silly Willie the Town Rogue — with a pregnant girlfriend. Be clear about who you are TELL THE TRUTH RIGHT FROM THE BEGINNING. Don’t offer up a better-enhanced version of yourself if you hope to ever meet this person in the real world. The TRUTH will come out SOONER or LATER.Be Honest about what you are seeking FROM THE VERY BEGINNING. This way you take the Mystery out of EXACTLY what you are looking for, and the other person knows also. This way there is a lot LESS time spent on PURSING that person, especially if THEY JUST WANT TO BE a CHAT BUDDY or FRIEND ONLY.Online flirting works much better if you are HONEST about your feelings. Web Do's and Don't When Meeting Someone Online (cont.)

The Worst thing in the world is a BORING chat friend or partner. FLIRTING is GOOD for the SOUL! Just keep it under control, and don’t overdo it!!!

Especially if the other person IS NOT RESPONDING FAVORABLY to your Advances.

Are you chatting or cheating? If you’re in a real-life relationship, it’s WRONG if you are MARRIED or ENGAGED or have a SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP already to even be ON the web looking for something better, or in addition to WHAT YOU HAVE ALREADY. This will only hurt the other person, and give them a false sense of something that will never come to pass, or if it does will be based upon a LIE and go nowhere. Some people are unbalanced enough to believe that all their life problems, boredom and aches can be magically SOLVED by Meeting someone Online to fulfill ALL their wants, needs and desires. Numerous people apparently well- adjusted men and women leave their partners for an NEW online relationship knowing very little about the other person, and yet worse have NOT even met them in person ONCE. This is the FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY the Net leads people to believe that NOTHING is Actually SOMETHING. In Reality it Actually is just false feelings and emotions running WILD based upon this FALSE PERCEPTION that there is something there when there ISN’T.Are there any great stories of online relationships being successful? Sure. Those who are confined to home due to disabilities or health, people with long distance relationships, and unattached men and women. And yes, there are stories of great love found online. Just don’t bet your future on it. Hope This Info Has Been Helpful to Make your Online Experience SAFER,HEALTHIER, and MOTIVATED BY GOD and NOT just your Feelings and Emotions that you had this minute, day, week, etc....

REMEMBER: The Best Relationships are Made by God, Meeting Someone in the FLESH face to face! and In HIS Timing and Trusting and Praying to HIM for ALL your Guidance. You Can’t Go Wrong When You Trust and Wait Upon God! Rom. 8:28, Prov. 3:5,6

Love in Christ Always, Matt <><

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