VIBRATIONS ROBERT SHEAFFER

Reptoids and Martians Invade Silicon Valley

he Bay Area UFO Expo took posedly takes place. They are obviously itually advanced," although unlike place at the Doubletree Hotel in built to accommodate , not die many others he has only been on board San Jose, August 26 and 27, little guys who pilot die saucers. And a ship only once. He has a ranch near T diere are lots of tables. Indeed, there are Mt. Adams, Washington, on which 2000, bringing together some of the top names in . I attended sporting rooms with nothing but tables. Virtually he operates the Self Mastery Earth a press badge to represent the SKEPTICAL everything that is inside the UFOs seems Institute. He claims the ability to INQUIRER and no one even looked twice to be constructed for the sole purpose of "vector in" UFOs for his visitors to see. at my hat from Nevada's show- abducting humans, an agenda the ETs They appear very much like "balls ing an alien quaffing some suds. With appear to be pursuing with single- of light," except that they are inter- approximately 3,000 tickets sold, the minded ferocity. dimensional. He calls this "ECETI," conference was a commercial success, The cteatures, says Jacobs, for "Enlightened Contact with Extra- although die big money was apparendy are clearly in charge. Some people terrestrial Intelligence." A "higher coun- not made from the registration fees of describe reptilians, although it is possible cil" seems to be in charge among visit- $25-55. Instead, each speaker con- that diis may be just another description ing UFOnauts, which is somehow tied ducted a two-hour "workshop" follow- of die praying mantis insectoid. (Which in with the Ascended Masters. The ing his or her lecture, with tickets is understandable, I think, since insects question of how these splendid aliens $20-25 each, to which my press pass and reptiles are easily confused.) can be reconciled with the horrific sce- unfortunately did not admit me, so I Angela Browne Miller is a psycho- nario painted by David Jacobs did not missed out on some of the wildest-of- therapist who has transmitted work seem to trouble anyone. die-wild stuff. However, what I did into this dimension from Albert David Shoemaker set up a vendor's learn from each speaker's "free" 45 Einstein and Karl Marx. She is encour- table in the hallway with a big sign read- minute lecture provided more than aging people to get in touch with their ing "UFO Crash Debris." He claims to enough excitement for one weekend. brain waves, urging us to "monitor have debris from two different crashes. David Jacobs, the noted UFO abduc- your brain waves for foreign conscious- One crashed in Missouri three days after tionist, painted a scary scenario of clan- nesses." We should be "highly con- the famous 1947 . The destine activity by one or more alien scious" (although not paranoid) when other was picked up at the "hot landing races, whose agenda is secret. Fortunately, we travel interdimensionally, so we can site" in New Mexico in 1998. He claims we have been able to penetrate many of properly map out the territory. to have conducted extensive scientific dieir secrets owing to die recollections of She represents a new movement call- testing that proves that these samples abductees, despite the aliens' best efforts ing itself Synaptic Liberation, which will have anomalous isotope ratios, and at making them forget. Jacobs is gready lead society to Utopia. She plans to impossible combinations of rare earths. obsessed by die "tables" in die saucers, transform it into a political party, and You can judge his claims for yourself at where die examinations of abductees sup- one of dieir principal demands will be www.crashdebris.com. for completely unrestricted interdimen- Shoemaker additionally claims sha- Robert Staffers World Wide Web page for sional travel. manic powers, as well as being an "exor- UFOs and other skeptical subjects is at James Gilliland is in "telepathic con- cist" and an "intuitive healer." He also www. . com. tact" with aliens who are said to be "spir- claims to be able to "shape-shift,"

SKEPTICAL INQUIRER January/February 2001 25 although unfortunately not in public. the Emerald Order, one of the Guardian Michael Tsarion is an astrologer, He says that while at last year's UFO races, who fortunately are protecting us numerologist, UFOlogist, and Tarot conference, he healed several people from the Intruder races. She explained reader. He explained about how both with fatal diseases. He claims that most about the different forms of matter: pre- the Atlanteans and the extraterrestrials of the UFO movement is actually run matter, etheric matter, etc., speaking were involved in ancient Celtic Ireland. by the government, bent on disinforma- with enormous confidence about the The stories of J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. tion. He accused one prominent most absurd twaddle you've ever heard. Lewis are not fictional, according to UFOlogist of trying to poison him. Richard Hoagland (see "The Face Tsarion: they describe the society of pre- Diluvian Ireland. Lawyer Peter Gersten of Citizens Anna Hayes displayed a detailed physiogonomy Against UFO Secrecy (www.caus.org) said that he is receiving channeled infor- of various extraterrestrial faces. She is in telepathic mation from another intelligence, and contact with the Emerald Order, one of the invited his listeners to subscribe to his daily e-mail about it. Most of us in this Guardian races, who fortunately are protecting room, he said, are probably in contact us from the Intruder races. with another form of intelligence. He thinks that this intelligence is terrestrial, and that is why it is being kept secret. "Dark agents" have been sent against Behind the Face on Mars" by Gary According to Gersten, the Roswell event him, which he was able to kill using his Posner, SI November/December 2000) of 1947, whatever it may have been, shamanistic powers, and so the conspir- drew by far the largest crowd, and the seems to have been a sort of "premature ators have stopped attacking him. 350 people who paid for his "workshop" downloading" of technology from this The Mexican UFOlogist Jaime makes him far and away the biggest hidden intelligence. He urged his listen- Mausson showed a photo allegedly moneymaker. He wasted twenty min- ers to look at www.padn.org—his taken by a Mexican TV viewer of cover- utes trying to set up his computer to "Planetary Appeal Distribution Net- age of Neil Armstrong's moon walk in present a slide show to us, using Adobe work." It's a multi-level marketing 1969. Supposedly it shows a "life form" Photoshop 3.0. Most people use that e-mail scheme. You send $10 to the on the Moon, although he conceded program for retouching photos, not for name at the top of the list, remove it, that "we have not been able to see them simply displaying them. He claimed then add your own to the bottom, all on the original tapes." The photo is that it's the only photo program he the while helping to promote the end of labeled, "1969 El Hombre de la Luna." knows how to use. Some of the "NASA the government cover-up. Hopefully It looks like a blurry image of a clay fig- photos" he showed contained copyright Gersten, as a lawyer, has carefully inves- ure, against an indistinct background notices by individuals, indicating that tigated whether or not this scheme vio- looking decidedly non-lunar. they must have been "improved" from lates any of the federal or state statutes At Metepec, Mexico, a UFO landed in their original state. against chain letters. 1994, and out came a luminous extrater- The surface of Mars is, he says, filled Gersten told of a "credible observer," restrial. He showed us a drawing of some- with artificial stuff that was covered up Gary Lowery, who works as a fire inspec- thing looking like an upright slug, with an by a cataclysm that occurred there, then tor. He and his family have ongoing, ET head affixed, but unfortunately to see some of it was gradually uncovered by more or less weekly contacts with beings the video you'd have to attend the work- erosion. He claimed to find "glass tun- that come into their home, entering shop. Apparendy the ETs in Mexico have nels" and "pipelines" on Mars. A through his closet. Gersten's workshop recendy become luminous, and such crea- "Martian " is perched pre- would showcase Gary and his family, tures are more frequendy being seen, cariously on the edge of a canyon, its talking about the monster in their closet especially in the mountainous deserts of windows and engines visible. There is (the obvious reference to the Sesame Baja California Norte. Maussan says he increasing evidence that the global civi- Street book of that tide was left unsaid). has seen these glowing beings himself lization that once covered Mars was us. Reportedly, during the workshop Gary once. Unforrunately, when he tried to The X-Files, says he, is an "expose"" of showed a video of his closet-monsters, take photos and videos of them, he could the power blocks that are trying to keep who as it turns out are reptoids. He also not, although he didn't explain why. All information from leaking out. Hoag- allegedly has their footprints, preserved he can do is swear to us he's telling the land said that he ought to call today's by putting aluminum foil under a towel truth. He expects that UFOs are going to workshop, "The Real Reason Al Gore in the closet through which they had land openly very soon. Picked Joe Lieberman." He repeated been entering the room. In fact, Gary Anna Hayes displayed a detailed that same statement twice afterward, claims to have found what may be the physiogonomy of various extraterrestrial and it seemed to me that an anti-Semitic claw of one of these creatures, which faces. She is in telepathic contact with implication was intended. apparendy fell off in the towel.

2 6 January/February 2001 After the conference, a brouhaha December 31, 2012. There is ongoing, tos and videos from his collection. He erupted when another UFOlogist major activity on die Moon. When we admitted to having used bogus creden- reportedly tried to muscle in on went to the Moon, we were told to get tials to get into a photo lab to do some Gersten's deal widi Lowrey for the exclu- off and stay off, which is what we did. of his UFO photo analysis, saying "I sive marketing rights to his reptoid tale. The tenth planet has been discovered, in sometimes regret this today." By his Promising lucrative book and movie rev- a 3,600 year orbit, and it will be clearly analysis, some of the Swiss enues, he persuaded Lowery to cease his visible in just two years. 's UFO photos show large appearances on the "Coast to Coast AM," as arranged by Gersten. You can read all about die great Reptoid dispute Stanton T. Friedman ended up mostly at www.caus.org/mc092300.htm. "Flying Saucer Physicist" Stanton T. speaking about several pro-UFOIogists Friedman said he would speak on who have claimed bogus degrees, or otherwise "Deceit in UFOlogy" from government agencies, and from such as significantly misrepresented their backgrounds. Phil Klass. However, what he ended up mostly speaking about were several pro- UFOlogists who have claimed bogus There appears to be something like a and presumably genuine objects, while degrees, or otherwise significantly mis- "Galactic Federation," and Dean sug- others look like hoaxes. represented their backgrounds. Unable gests that our quarantine, the embargo Different types of spacecraft come in to charge any UFO skeptics with doing of Earth, has just been lifted. We will several different ratios. You can predict this, he contented himself with pointing soon be making contact with beings that where UFOs will be seen next based on the out statements by leading skeptics that are interstellar, intergalactic, and inter- ratios of die UFOs we see now. Cylinders he construed as inaccurate. If I were to dimensional. The "initiation of the are followed by orbs. It is the ETs' decision do this widi die statements of Friedman race" is taking place. to keep UFOs hidden, not the govern- and his colleagues, I could talk for days. Clyde Lewis (www.clydelewis.com) ment's. He predicted an increase in UFO Dr. Roger Leir is a podiatrist who has done acting in independent films and activity, and especially abductions, in performs surgeries to extract supposedly screenwriting. He does a talk show called Arizona in die next one to two mondis . The surgical team is Ground Zero, heard over the Internet. Budd Hopkins, another famous essentially composed of MUFON mem- He claims that the mass-media mar- abductionist, talked about how abduc- bers, with the first surgeries in 1995 dis- ginalize UFOlogists, taking their com- tion experiences affect young children. covering a T-shaped object in a mem- ments out of context. The future of In some cases, a newborn baby has been brane that allegedly couldn't be cut. The UFOlogy is clouded, with the abducted from die hospital before its lab report showed that there were a large "debunkers" are getting far more press mother even took it home. In his work- number of special nerve cells associated than the believers(l). But 80 percent of shop, he will discuss the signs by which with it. What, he asked, are nerve cells the public believe that ETs have visited. childhood abductions can be recog- doing connected to a foreign object? He suggests diat aliens have bases on nized. If babies show fear of its mother The National Institute for Discovery Earth. He doesn't want any more "dis- wearing dark glasses, or fear of being put Science in Las Vegas, funded by Robert closure," because it will just produce into the crib at night, it suggests that the Bigelow (www.nidsci.org), agreed to pay more lies. Aliens and die military are child is being abducted by aliens. Young for testing diese implants at Los Alamos working together. It's alien-military abductees in school tend to be loners, and at New Mexico Tech. One implant activity, and some aliens are hostile. Hopkins says, and to feel inadequate, was described as "amorphous metal," but Norman Bergrun, author of The which helpfully gives lonely and inse- it was highly metallic. The results were Ringmakers of Saturn, says diat much of cure children somediing else to worry compared to "meteorites." Why the Saturn's rings are actually a form a space- about. Some alien implants, once dis- aliens might implant meteorites in some- pollution, the emissions from covered, will disappear. This happens all one's toes was not explained. Electromagnetic Vehicles (EMVs) diat the time. As for Barney and Betty Hill, Robert O. Dean rambled on about are cruising around there. He claims Hopkins suggests diat they had proba- many tilings, making little sense. He diat diere is ongoing activity in Saturn's bly been picked up by aliens many times railed against the National Security Act, rings, presumably mining. These EMVs before their famous abduction. the Federal Reserve, FDR's New Deal, have turned up on die Moon as well. The Bay Area UFO Expo was so suc- and the UK-USA Security Pact. NASA knows all about diis, but of cessful diat there's no doubt diey'll hold Apparently a 26,000-year cycle is course is covering it up (see www.ring another one next summer. But if you about to end, and humanity is evolving makersofsaturn .com). can't wait diat long, in May you can into a new species, emerging like a but- Jim Dilletoso announced his inten- attend Conspiracycon—unless the Men terfly. The calendar will run out on tion to show 199 of the best UFO pho- In Black get you first.

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