Volume 48 Number 4 October 2019

A Publication of the Institute of Guidance Counsellors

Addiction, Alcohol and the - Adult Child of Alcoholics Inside: - How secondhand drinking ruins lives - 25 ways to live well into old age - Art Therapy 01006 P Works IGC A4 Advert Approved.qxp_Layout 1 06/09/2019 11:48 Page 1

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THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER

Cover photo: TCD Joint Honours Programme Launch In this issue: Exploiting Passion...... 5 America’s Job Listings Have Gone Off the Deep End...... 22

Another SUCCESSfully Completed Erasmus+ Research Project Addiction, Alcoholism and the Adult Children of Alcoholics: in Guidance Education...... 6 The Loss of Self with Some Jungian and Adlerian Insights...... 23

Why Is Guidance Counselling Based In Second Level Schools?...... 7 How secondhand drinking ruins lives: ‘Every family has been touched by this’...... 32 Art Therapy...... 9 We’re told that too much screen time hurts our kids. The True ‘I Am’ and the Nature of the Divine Self...... 11 Where’s the evidence?...... 35

Generalise, don’t specialise: why focusing Happy ever after: 25 ways to live well into old age...... 36 too narrowly is bad for us...... 14

Why boarding schools produce bad leaders...... 18

Copy Deadline Contributions of articles can be sent to: The deadline for the next issue of Guideline Magazine is Fred Tuite, 31st January 2020 1 Loreto Park Articles (which may be edited) and advertisements should be Troys Lane with the editor before that date. Kilkenny Tel: 087-6698873 Guideline is published three times a year (October, February and Email: [email protected] May) by the Institute of Guidance Counsellors. Contributions and advertisements are welcome. The Editors reserve the right to amend or abridge any contribution accepted for publication. For advertising contact our Advertising Items for inclusion should preferably be sent in MS Word by Manager: email to the address below. Typeset articles or advertisements Carmel Dooley, are best sent in high resolution Adobe Acrobat format. PRWORKS, The opinions expressed in the articles are those of the 14 Ceannt Ave, Mervue, Galway contributors and not necessarily those of the Editors or the Mobile: 087 2349903 Officers of the Institute of Guidance Counsellors. Email: [email protected] Web site: www.prworks.ie Acceptance of advertisements does not constitute an endorsement of the products or services by the Institute.

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Editorial Board Fred Tuite, Gerry Reilly, Betty McLaughlin, Patricia Wroe and Michael L. O’Rourke

Institute of Guidance Counsellors, Head Office, 17 Herbert St., Dublin 2

Tel: (01) 676 1975 Fax: (01) 661 2551 Email: [email protected] 3 2020 IMPORTANT DATES

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Normal closing date for applications (€45 fee) 22 July (17:15) and closing date for free Change of Course Choices facility Exceptional closing date for late applications for those already attending a participating HEI 5 February (12:00) Early-August Online facility to amend course choices becomes available (€10 fee) Round 0 offers for certain categories of applicants

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4 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER

Exploiting Passion

Fred Tuite

Most cultural enterprises demand a lot of voluntary activity. The Kilkenny Arts Festival is no different and along with the professional administration relies on an army of volunteers to run the box office, venues and support the artists performing there. My small role in this is as a driver, mainly collecting and delivering artists to Dublin airport. It gives me an insight into the crazy life that some of the performers have. I remember Looking for reasons, the Duke team found that passion artists I collected who flew in from Mexico, performed in can be used as a balancing rationale against the inherent Kilkenny that night, and I returned them to the airport the injustice of exploitation. As one of the authors, Prof Aaron following morning for a flight to Sweden. But at the lower Kay explained, “I have found that when faced with massive end of the Arts and culture scale are those struggling to get disparities between rich and poor, people can downplay a foothold in the sector. These included a lot of volunteers injustice by telling themselves that wealth brings its own set or interns at the festival who were working for little or for free of problems . . . In the case of working employees harder for because they were passionate about it and because it would no extra pay, or asking them to do demeaning work or work “look good on the CV”. outside their job description, believing this is fair because these workers are indulging their passions may be a similar Gemma Tipton, writing in The Irish Times in June this year means of justification.” referred to a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology by a team at Duke University and “Our research is not anti-passion,” says another of the titled “Understanding Contemporary Forms of Exploitation: authors, Jay Kim “There is excellent evidence that passionate Attributes of Passion Serve to Legitimize the Poor Treatment workers benefit in many ways. It’s simply a warning that of Worker”. The study looked at how culture workers were we should not let the current cultural emphasis on finding encouraged (or expected) to work for free, expand their passion in our work be co-opted by the human tendency to tasks and hours and become part of the gig economy. legitimise or ignore exploitation.” She writes, “The “doing more for less” strategy had its place During the recession, she writes, the arts were pared back when the economy crashed, and people were desperately to the bone, and survived. Add the passion equation and trying to keep venues open, and keep the show on the road. it seems that those working in the arts have unintentionally And yet, as other sectors have recovered, the arts economy colluded in backing the sector into an exploitative cul-de- is being held artificially low. Rates of pay haven’t increased, sac. We need to get back to the real costs of putting on as the cost of living continues to climb and, anecdotally, a play, mounting an exhibition, making music, maintaining some arts workers are being asked by funders to justify their opportunities for writers to create a literature to be proud salaries, in a way that wouldn’t be required, at that level of of. This isn’t solely a question for the arts: across the board remuneration, in any other industry. So why is it considered we need to remove the justification, and just look at the not only acceptable, but entirely appropriate in the arts?” exploitation. The team at Duke conducted eight studies, with more So, the encouragement we give to students to “follow their than 2,400 participants. In one, respondents rated it more passion” has to be tempered with a warning that it can lead legitimate to exploit workers in jobs traditionally associated to exploitation, poor career structure and patchy earnings. with passion. These included artist and social worker, rather While doing something that you love is an important part of than, say, cashier or debt collector. It also clearly extends your wellbeing, so too is earning money to support a family to other careers where nurturing is seen as part of the and have a life. job description, such as teacher and nurse. In another of We have seen how careers that involve passion and the studies, participants, who were told an artist was very idealism like those that involve caring and support are ripe passionate about their job, said that it was more appropriate for exploitation and rewarded with miserly wages for looking for the boss to exploit them, than a colleague who, they were after our sick, elderly, children and animals, along with those told, wasn’t so emotionally invested. in the creative enterprises that so enrich our world. There is The researchers also found that people who are exploited in always scope for the volunteers, but the professionals and their jobs (including being asked to work far beyond a job the performers deserve their just rewards. description, work for longer hours, give up on family time, experience verbal abuse, have unreasonable deadlines) are more likely to be seen as passionate about their work.

5 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER

ANOTHER SUCCESSFULLY COMPLETED ERASMUS+ RESEARCH PROJECT IN GUIDANCE EDUCATION

Saturday, August, 31st 2019, saw the Erasmus+ funded SUCCESS (Strategies to Utilise and Cultivate positive Characteristics and Employability Skills in Schools) research project come to a close following two years of hard work and dedication from the research team. The Institute of Child Education and Psychology, Europe was the proud Irish partner on the project which sought to identify the priority needs of guidance counsellors and their the suitability, effectiveness and cross-cultural relevance of the students within five participating European countries (University of programme, five piloting sessions were arranged across each of Vilnius - Lithuania, CESIE - Italy, Hellenic Association of Positive the partner countries and partner feedback was utilized to hone Psychology - Greece, Grant Xpert Ltd. and Institute of Dvelopment and tweak the materials towards the needs of those working as Ltd, N. Charalambous - Cyprus and ICEP Europe - Ireland), and guidance professionals across Europe. develop an evidence based training programme rooted in the Finally, having gathered all of the feedback from each of these principles of Positive Psychology which was designed to satisfy piloting sessions and incorporated these recommendations these needs and build the capacity of those working in guidance into the draft programme, the SUCCESS Training Package was education across the continent. finalised and uploaded onto the bespoke SUCCESS Online The first phase of the project involved a comprehensive needs Learning Platform (www.successlearning.eu), where they are freely analysis, consisting of detailed literature reviews outlining the state available to all educators who may wish to peruse or implement of play in guidance education within each of the countries, as them within their learning environments. A series of launch events well as a series of focus groups and interviews with guidance were hosted in each of the partner countries, culminating in the practitioners across Europe which sought to identify key areas of official European launch at the University of Vilnius, Lithuania need among staff working within the field and the most important on June 10th, which was attended by over 60 practitioners and skills that required bolstering among their students. This research the representatives from each of the partner organisations. The phase formed the bedrock of the SUCCESS Training package, SUCCESS team is extremely proud of the outputs which have been as the consortium sought to build a programme which would produced over the duration of two year project and is confident best satisfy the need within the field. Based upon the feedback that the training materials produced will be of considerable benefit ascertained within the research phase of the project, it was to guidance professionals across Europe for the upcoming term decided that the SUCCESS programme would comprise of four and beyond. modules rooted in core concepts from Positive Psychology, If you would like to learn more about the SUCCESS project, namely Positivity, Character Strengths, Resilience and Meaning (of please feel free to contact Mr. Stephen Smith (SUCCESS Project Life). Furthermore, ten crucial employability skills (self-awareness, Manager) at [email protected]. self-management, self-presentation, creativity, critical thinking, decision making, communication, negotiation, teamwork and Our aim is to circulate the materials to as wide an audience as engagement) emerged as pivotal for all students endeavouring possible so we would be delighted if anyone who is interested to make a smooth transition into the world of work. Therefore, the in our work accessed the freely available SUCCESS Training consortium decided that each of these skills would be embedded Programme at www.successlearning.eu. across all four modules of the training programme, with a view to maximizing its utility within the guidance curriculum.

The programme development phase of the project spanned approximately 9 months, during which time the methodological framework for developing the module was agreed and implemented. Each partner was tasked with contributing to the development of “Pivotal for all students four 15 hour modules, which would be comprised of approximately five hours of individual activities, five hours of group activities endeavouring to make and five hours of homework activities. The modules consisted a smooth transition of 20 activities in total and would include activities ranging from introductory or beginner level to more advanced lessons designed into the world of work” to cement the introductory learning and challenge students to further refine and enhance their capacities in relation to the four core themes of the SUCCESS programme. In order to ensure

6 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER

Important as they are, these are just ancillary arguments for having guidance counselling in schools. The main rationale for having guidance counselling in schools concern the functioning of schools and the education system. The following are well Why Is Guidance recognised indicators of the quality of the educational systems Counselling Based In • Student participation • Student retention Second Level Schools? • Student engagement with learning • Student performance JOHN MCCARTHY • Student progression • Student transitions. Governments provide guidance counselling in schools to support This is a pretty fundamental question that has rarely been the achievement of these quality indicators. You may well ask what discussed at IGC events and has not been addressed in the that has to do with a student who arrives at your school office with training programmes for guidance counsellors, for teachers, and suicide ideation. Well, it has everything to do! How does your for school principals and deputy principals. It’s almost taken fore- intervention in this particular case affect the student’s participation, granted that the answer is so obvious that it does not need to retention, engagement with learning, performance, progression, be discussed. The only time it gets an airing is when guidance and transitions? Sure, they are not the presenting problem, but counselling provision in schools is threatened, and then we that problem affects all of these indicators. I challenge you to think hear all kinds of idiosyncratic answers and no common national of the most difficult cases you have ever dealt with and consider message from IGC. They generally concern how great guidance what your successful intervention contributed to in terms of the counsellors are, how essential they are for student welfare, and all quality functioning of your school and the education system, in the disasters that would befall pupils if guidance counselling was addition to the benefits to the individual concerned. Which of the withdrawn from schools. These are all defensive arguments. They above quality indicators did your intervention contribute to? If you miss out on the obvious answers. At the beginning of the school can answer that question clearly for yourself as per the quality year, it’s good to reflect on why governments in any country indicators above, then you can also give a very clear and simple support the provision of guidance counselling in school. Here are message to all school partners (parents, teachers, principals, some simple arguments for your delectation! deputy principals, Board of Management, Dept of Education) on your contribution to the school and to the efficiency of the education system. Of course, it’s not only about the efficiency of your particular “you contribute to social school or the second level education system. It also concerns the knock-on effect: ensuring successful transitions to higher and inclusion and social mobility.” further education and training and the efficiency of those systems. High drop out rates from post-secondary choices says something about the career learning preparation that takes place in schools – if guidance counselling in schools does good work (and/or is given adequate time for such work!), then the participation, Multiplier effect: retention, progression rates in higher and further education and Schools are places where teenagers congregate most. In a training benefit accordingly. Your work also concerns benefitting sense, one has a captive audience and easy access to this age the labour market and economy at large. You are in a unique group. One can get easy access to a classroom to meet groups position to flag to parents, students, and teachers emerging work of students and promote personal, educational and career well- opportunities when making career plans. being. Students also have easier access to guidance counselling Finally, you contribute to social inclusion and social mobility. – it’s at a place where they spend most of their daily life. So, there You help young people to overcome social and other barriers is a huge multiplier effect from having school-based guidance to their participation, engagement with learning, progression, counselling. By placing guidance counselling outside of schools, performance, and transitions. there is a risk that access to guidance counselling becomes even more hit and miss. Now put a smile on your face and tell people what you really do and why your work is important! “I help students to participate Developmental stage effect: better in school, to engage with learning, to improve their school Schools are places where teenagers in groups pass through a very results, to progress through the school programme, to make important developmental life stage and learn to make personal, successful transitions beyond school, to think about emerging social, educational, and career decisions. Some students need job opportunities, and to overcome the personal, social and a lot of support, and healthy adults in schools can help to grow other barriers that block any aspects of their social and learning healthy adolescents or can support parents with the same aim. So, progression.” That’s a positive message, based on your strengths! it makes sense to have guidance counselling provision in schools at this time of adolescent change. John McCarthy LLD (Hon.), Director Guidance counsellor specialist effect: International Centre for Career Development and Public Policy Nice, France Schools are places where adolescents have the possibilities of establishing trust relationships with adults that they see on a daily basis. Teachers, principals, and deputy principals, chaplains, home school liaison officers, are some of these adults but in general they do not have the specialized training and the time to assist, and are happy to have a specialist guidance counsellor on the staff to refer to and/or to lean on. 7 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER

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How Art Therapy works There have been many developments in art therapy since Milner first published her seminal book in 1950. There are now a proliferation of individual and group exercises and activities ART THERAPY which can be tailored to individual and group needs, and the availability of materials has allowed for greater access ANNE DOYLE to expression in group and individual settings. Techniques, such as Winnicott’s squiggle game, which allows interaction between the child and the therapist, facilitates the development Background of the therapeutic relationship on an equal footing where both child and therapist take turns and share responsibility for the The use of art in therapy has been well noted in the literature outcome of the work. The art therapist works with the client since the early part of the 20th century. The use of imagery in by being sensitive to the images produced and also being psychoanalysis was championed by Carl Jung, who supported physically and emotionally congruent with the client. However, the idea that art was an important means of both conscious it is important to point out that the job of the art therapist is not to and unconscious communication. It could be argued that judge or interpret images produced in the session, but to build Jung’s notion that art bridges the gap between the conscious relationships through the image making so that the important and unconscious formed the foundation of art therapy as we work of processing the transference and countertransference know it today. In Britain, art therapy emerged in the NHS as that passes between them can be done. an aid to recovery for soldiers returning from both world wars Because of the vulnerability of people entering into the process, and by the 1980’s, the practice of art therapy had evolved to it is crucial that art therapy is carried out by a trained therapist, incorporate both art and therapy (Case & Dalley 1992). so they are able to pick up sensitive communications through the art and to be able to hold and contain the client struggling What is Art Therapy? with the unfolding of the deepest difficulties in relation to the emerging feelings after the session. Art therapy is an approach that combines therapy with creative expression in order to promote individual development and to process unease and/or conflict. The counselling and Applications of Art Therapy psychotherapy literature has highlighted the impact of art While art therapy is a well-established method of working making in the therapeutic process for many years. Over with children, it has also been found to be a highly effective 50 years ago, Carl Rogers, the father of person centred intervention in many adult group settings. Contemporary art counselling, stated that when a therapist facilitates a client in therapists work in hospitals, schools, social services and free creative expression, this gives them “complete freedom community settings as well as in private practice. Frequently, to think, to feel, to be, whatever is most inward within himself” art therapy makes up part of an individual’s overall treatment, (Rogers, 2012. p358). More recently, Cathy Malchiodi (2003), for example as part of the service provided by multidisciplinary art therapist and author of more than 20 books on the topic, mental health teams. Furthermore, art therapy has proven to described art therapy as the therapeutic use of art making be a valuable approach for people dealing with particular within a professional relationship. Furthermore, she explains challenges such as mental health problems, eating disorders, that the purpose of art therapy is to improve or maintain the survivors of trauma including sexual abuse and PTSD. It is mental health and emotional well-being of the client, utilising well documented in the literature that art therapy is especially drawing, painting, sculpture, photography and other forms of useful when working with individuals who have language visual art expression. limitations and the approach has also proved effective with There is general consensus in the literature that therapeutic refugee populations, victims of political and sexual violence, approaches that rely heavily on the use of verbal expression family abuse, bereaved children, prisoners, and those dealing alone do not provide adequate opportunities for children, in with chronic physical and mental illness. particular, to express the depth of their experience. During art therapy, feelings can be expressed and examined without words, allowing for pre-verbal and less conscious expression. (i) Working with children Milner (2011) describes this as the creative process allowing Freudian theory was revolutionary in acknowledging the feelings and impulses to find their outlet. For Winnicott (2005), importance of consciousness in the inner world of the child, experiencing is what allows inner reality and external life to and thus paved the way for successive theorists to build on connect and techniques he developed, such as the squiggle the child centred approach of working therapeutically with game, are still used by therapists today. The product created children. Subsequently, theorists such as Melanie Klein, within art therapy has been described as the third person in who used drawing extensively to gain access to the child’s the room and this is essentially what differentiates art therapy unconscious, and Winnicott became specifically concerned from other verbal psychotherapies. with the early infantile experience of the child. Art therapy allows children to engage in an artistic activity where the outcome is “CRUCIAL THAT ART THERAPY IS CARRIED OUT BY A TRAINED THERAPIST”

9 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER unplanned and spontaneous. This allows them to experience anxiety and fear, in symbolic and indirect ways. Furthermore, creation from a non-critical perspective and to work in non- the experience of creating and processing art can help clients committal way. Play and art are natural ways for children to heal by providing opportunities for them to integrate their construct coherence and meaning and can provide a medium emotions with their thoughts and physical experiences (Van for children to ‘talk’ about their psychological experience. der Kolk 2014). The use of materials offers children a non-verbal way to work Through the spontaneous act of seeing, hearing and feeling through their difficulties. Unlike traditional talk therapies, in themselves through the medium of art, survivors of incest learn art therapy the therapist becomes an active participant in to process their trauma (Durkin et al 1989). This facilitates the child’s process, allowing the child to engage at their own the possibility of catharsis, healing and integration for them. pace, either working independently or mutually interacting with Furthermore, it is stated that art therapy makes it possible to the therapist in the room. bypass intellectualisation, thereby allowing clients to gain a new understanding of themselves through the relaxation of defences and the reduction of anxiety through the creative (ii) Mental Health process (Durkin et al 1989). It has been said that participating in the creative arts is, in itself, an integrating act for the artist and so it is bound to promote positive mental health. In clinical applications, compared to verbal therapy, clients with mental health difficulties have been seen to find art therapy a more direct way to access emotions. This is particularly true when dealing with the core problems of people with personality disorders, namely more emotional awareness and constructive emotion regulation. Haeyen et al (2015) carried out research into the efficacy of art therapy with this cohort and found evidence that individuals in the study Conclusion learned to regulate their emotions through the artwork and the art-making process. Prior to art therapy, participants’ emotions Using art in therapy has grown significantly through the were more uncontrolled or over-controlled, which resulted in 20th century and has become a well-established practice them feeling unsafe. Participating in art therapy helped them in individual and group settings in health, education and to cope with their emotions instead of being overwhelmed and community settings. Different approaches, techniques and unable to reframe or intervene effectively. As a result of the theories have evolved over time in the field, strongly influenced improvement in their emotion-regulation skills, the participants by the ideas of writers such as Freud, Jung, Klein, Winnicott felt more confident that they had more control over their own and Milner. It is now widely acknowledged that art therapy is sense of security. Emotional regulation is one of the most a profession involving the meeting of art as a creative process challenging aspects of working with clients diagnosed with and psychotherapy as a relational practice. In recent years, personality disorders, and is also what makes participating in the provision of art therapy in schools family resource centres school and college life most difficult for them. A key feature in in Ireland (FRCs) has emerged and the writer feels this is a the treating of poor emotional regulation with psychotherapy is trend will grow into the future. the focus on the here and now. Art therapy sessions provide clients with time for painting without direction, in the here and now, so that clients become free to be themselves in both Bibliography mind and body. This experience includes the freedom to make Case, C. and Dalley, T. (1992). The Handbook of Art Therapy. Hove, changes, which they can then carry over into their everyday East Sussex: Routledge. life. To conclude, the expert opinions and evidence from Durkin, J., Perach, D. and Wadeson, H. (1989). Advances in Art multidisciplinary treatment studies suggest that art therapy Therapy. New York: John Wiley & Sons. is a promising approach in dealing with the symptoms of Haeyen, S., van Hooren, S. and Hutschemaekers, G. (2015). Perceived personality disorders (Haeyen et al, 2015). effects of art therapy in the treatment of personality disorders, cluster B/C: A qualitative study. The Arts in Psychotherapy, [online] 45, pp.1- 10. Available at: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/ (iii) Survivors of trauma and sexual abuse S0197455615000283 [Accessed 19 Jul. 2019]. Malchiodi, C. ( 2003 ). Handbook of Art Therapy. New York & London People who have experienced trauma must tell their stories : The Guilford Press. and have those stories witnessed in order to heal (Van der Kolk Milner, M. (2011). On Not Being Able to Paint. 2nd ed. London and 2014). A key element of art therapy is giving trauma survivors a NY: Routledge. means of expression which facilitates the telling of a story. The Murray, C., Moore Spencer, K., Stickl, J. and Crowe, A. (2017). See arts have been seen to help trauma survivors to give voice to the Triumph Healing Arts Workshops for Survivors of Intimate Partner their experiences, particularly when abuse has had the effect Violence and Sexual Assault. Journal of Creativity in Mental Health, of silencing victims (Murray et al 2017). Talk-based therapies 12(2), pp.192-202. may be threatening for clients impacted by abuse, as they may Rogers, C. (2012). On Becoming a Person. New York: Houghton Mifflin have a difficult time verbalizing their experiences or finding the Harcourt. right words to describe their emotional responses. Murray et Van der Kolk, B. (2015). The Body Keeps the Score. New York (New al (2017) describe how art therapy offers clients opportunities York): Penguin Books. to reflect upon and discuss intense, difficult emotions, such as Winnicott, D. (2005). Playing and Reality. Routledge.

10 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER

THE TRUE ‘I AM’ AND THE NATURE OF THE DIVINE SELF BY MICHAEL O’SHEA

Introduction (Ibid.). In the ‘Burning Bush’ narrative, the ‘I am’ represents the definitive being. Neville Goddard has noted that the ‘I For one individual to ask another “Who are you?”, the automatic am’, in this case, is the ‘definition of the absolute’ and the response nearly always begins with ‘I am’. The question is, ‘feeling of permanent awareness’ (cited in Allen, 2016, pg293). what comes after ‘I am’? To say ‘I am’ a nurse or a teacher The ultimate ‘I am’, therefore, is fully self-aware and may be or a mechanic is to describe your chosen role in society; it described as a manifestation of the divine within. Goddard describes ‘what you are’, not ‘who you are’. The intention also stated that ‘I may forget who I am, where I am, what I am, behind this discussion is to explore the more complex and but I cannot forget that I AM’ (Ibid.). The ‘awareness of being deep rooted answer to the question as to who ‘I am’. However, remains’ regardless of circumstances or situation changes. In as this debate evolves during the course of this treatise, the other words, the ‘I am’ is that essential self that one might refer association between the acknowledgement of the ‘divine self’ to when confronted with challenging or changing life situations and the recognition of the true ‘I am’ in oneself will be debated. (Ibid., pg294). The ‘I am’, therefore, in each individual, is the The notion that one’s divine state is not ‘fixed’ and the potential foundation stone of one’s essence of which one may only have for ‘growth’ remains, while still remaining true to one’s essential limited awareness. being, will also be explored.

The question of ‘I Am’ Burns has also noted that in Old Testament times, a person’s name identified that person in terms of uniqueness as opposed The question of ‘I Am’ dates back to Old Testament times to being just a means of identification. In short, to know a with the narrative of Moses and the Burning Bush (Good person by name was not only to dialogue with that person but News Bible, Exodus 3:1-6, 13-15). During this encounter, God, also allowed one to engage with that person’s internal energies. through the voice in the ‘Burning Bush’, refers to Himself as ‘I Hence, to know the other in an intimate manner was to give Am’. God tell Moses to inform the people that ‘The one who is meaning to the person’s name (Ibid. pp. 47-48). It is possible called I AM has sent me to you’ (Exodus 3:14). In a separate to speculate, therefore, that the ‘Burning Bush’ account was an publication (The New Jerusalem Bible, Exodus 3:14) God, in attempt to establish a closer relationship between people and the ‘Burning Bush’, refers to Himself as ‘I am who is’. This the Divine. Yet, the predominant assumption existing is that discourse continues with an instruction from God to Moses the Divine remains extrinsic to the self as opposed to being that he (Moses) was to tell the Israelites that ‘I am has sent intrinsically associated with the self. Is it possible, therefore, me to you’. that the ‘Burning Bush’ narrative exposed Moses to his own divine self? Is it a case that Moses became aware of his own true self as he became more attuned to his own divine nature? The concept of ‘I Am’ is complex and hard to define, even for One may speculate that the true nature of ‘I am’ becomes ourselves. In Biblical terms, the ‘I AM’, as professed to Moses, clearer as one develops a closer affinity with one’s divine describes the very essence of being (Matthew Henry’s Bible condition. Commentary). ‘I AM THAT I AM’ depicted in the ‘Burning Bush’ narrative, as described by Henry, conforms to the ultimate in ‘self-existence’ and is true to His own Nature. In this same Nevertheless, when applied to the human condition, the discussion, Henry stated that the ‘I AM’ in the Divine is both divine self need not necessarily be interpreted or defined in a unchangeable and undivided. According to John E Huesman religious context. For the purpose of this discussion, the divine S.J. (cited in Brown et al, 1968, pg30-31), the ‘I Am’ in the or spiritual self refers to the innate and ingrained uniqueness Burning Bush could be defined as the ‘One’ who causes all that makes one the ‘I am’ that one is. Yet, the more one is of creation to exist, thus representing the source of continuity. attuned into the spiritual realm of the self, then the more one is The voice in the ‘Burning Bush’ may be described, therefore, more acutely aware of the true ‘I am’. To be able to say ‘I Am’ as the ultimate ‘I am’; unchanging, uncompromising and truly with true confidence is to be connected with the spiritual or divine in every aspect of self. Biblical commentators such as divine nature of the self (https://www.summitlighthouse.org/i- Rita J. Burns have argued that to confront the ‘I am’ in the am-presence). The essence of this message is that there is ‘Burning Bush’ is to come face to face with the ultimate Divine a ‘true self’ which is precious, distinctive and gifted in every (1983, pg 47-48). In this respect, ‘I am’ denotes a ‘presence’, way. ‘Do I know myself well enough’ to be able to address the according to Burns, one which ‘bears a sense of being’ question ‘Who am I’.

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Are the high drop-out rates among first year college students I Do What I Am symptomatic of a culture which promotes job market and status appeal as opposed to encouraging a more self-reflective In the motion picture ‘Along Came A Spider’, Hollywood personality-career/course match? Psychologist and author actor Morgan Freeman depicts the character of a forensic John Bradshaw (1990, p. 9) has noted that those who rely on psychological profiler in the case of a kidnapped child. During the affirmations of others lack a sense of self. He also observed the course of a discussion with an FBI agent in the film, the that those who lack a sense of self find it difficult to find any character portrayed by Freeman states ‘You are not what you form of personal fulfilment in life (ibid.). This author is of the do; you do what you are’. This is a complex statement but not opinion that to be a pleaser often correlates to a lack of self- one without rich meaning. If one becomes what one does, acceptance and often reflects a desire for positive affirmations then is one may be totally defined by his/her role, actions or and platitudes. Frequently, such individuals harbour a greater profession. To solely rely on the response ‘I am a nurse’, ‘I am a respect for the ‘I am’ in others that for the ‘I am’ in themselves’. carpenter’ etc., addresses the question ‘what I do’ and not ’who The ‘I am’ in oneself often becomes lost in the concern for I am’. In this case a person can become hidden behind a title or others which often results in some level of frustration if the a role. Individuality might give way to the creation of a persona desired recognition is not forthcoming. whereby, the real self may become confused with the role one adopts in life. Instead, to embrace the idea that ‘you do what you are’ is one which gives due credence to the expression of one’s very being. The simplest example of this theory is Holland’s Theory of Career Choice. Originating in 1959, John I do not need to become someone Holland developed the theory that appropriate career choices could be aligned to a subject’s personality type. Instead of a else in order to be more valued or person assuming a role or a persona according to the career accepted by me or by anyone else. choice made, a career choice, according to Holland, is made on the basis that the choice complements the individual’s personality type. The notion that a career choice does not correlate with a personality type is like trying to fill a square hole with a round peg. In short, a sustainable career-person One question which arises is; is the false ‘I am’ the persona fit is one which does not conflict with but remains in harmony I present to others an attempt to find acceptance. Are those with one’s personality. One cannot do what is contrary to one’s who portray egotistical or narcissistic tendencies disengaged very nature. The search for life choices, therefore, begins with from aspects of an ‘I am’ that the subject himself/herself finds a process of self-exploration in order to discover the ‘I am’ unappealing? Bradshaw was of the view that an individual with which is the true nature of self. The appropriate life choice may no sense of self often creates a false self in order to become consequently be described as a means of expressing one’s the person he/she is ‘supposed to be’ (Ibid., p. 18). He referred true self or nature. In support of this notion, Louise L. Hay to narcissism as a ‘self in hiding’, the result of not experiencing (1991, p. 161) that our work is a ‘divine expression’. In other unconditional love and the belief ‘something is wrong’ with the ‘I works the work we do is an outward expression of our creative am’. (Ibid., p. 86). The ‘I am’ can get lost in so many fabricated competences. ‘What I do’ gives manifestation to who ‘I am’. selves that the true ‘I am’ can become unidentifiable from the Consequently, to try to say ‘I am what I do’ might invariably false. Bradshaw observed that the ‘I amness’ in a person may result in a misinformed vision of self. To adopt the position that become lost or damaged when one’s inner child is hurt thus ‘I do what I am’ is to remain more loyal to one’s very nature. I resulting in a desire to be loved and accepted (ibid., p. 40). am more, therefore, than what my role defines me. The ‘I am’ Consequently, to begin with the statement ‘I am’ in a manner in me is more than what I do. ‘What I do’ refers to only one which displays the true and genuine self, one must identify aspect of the self. The ‘I am’ in me is the embodiment and the true ‘I am’ in oneself. This journey of self-exploration and personification of the entire self. self-discovery is one which is designed to separate the false ‘I am’s’ from the one ‘I am’ which is true and unpretentious. In order to be able to ‘do what I am’, surely one requires a clear vision of the true ‘I am’ in order that appropriate life choices can be made. Bradshaw noted that the therapeutic process equated to rediscovering the self that ‘has been in hiding’ (Ibid., p. 80).

The great debate surrounding the use of standardises tests is the notion that they are almost designed to measure a child’s ‘unchangeable intelligence’ (Dweck, 2012, p. 6). The difficulty with this mindset is that it negates the potential for further growth and development. Hence the great debate regarding the P11 testing system in the UK which categorises young children according to scores. Yet Dweck referred to Alfred Binet who noted that a child’s intelligence scores could improve with appropriate pedagogical and experiential

12 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER input (Ibid.). Dweck distinguished the potential for personal ‘I am’ they are destined to be. growth of those individuals with a ‘fixed’ mindset as opposed The true ‘I am’ in the ‘Burning Bush’ narrative is described to those with ‘growth mindset attitude. She noted that a as the personification of perfection, the ‘Ultimate I Am’ which mindset is part of one’s personality but can be changed (p. cannot be improved. Within a human context, however, the ‘I 22). Dweck is of the view that those with a ‘growth’ mindset am’ is not ‘fixed’ and is open to new learning, new challenges can allow the person to achieve, with some effort, what was and new experiences in a quest to be the best ‘I am’ I can once considered impossible (p. 41). Success, in this respect, be. The ‘Ultimate I Am’ is beyond the reach of the human allows the individual to be his/her best self (p. 44). In contrast, condition. Yet, the creative potential which lies within, is an Dweck stressed that those with a ‘fixed’ mindset are not open expression of one’s divine nature. Hence the idea that ‘I do to new learning or experiences and, as a result, limit their what I am’ own potential for achievement (p. 67). She also argued that

Those caught up in a quest for recognition and praise very frequently become overly concerned about the needs of others and fail to address their own needs. This exercise can be costly in terms of loss of self-identity. Those engaging in a therapeutic process are often required to retrace their past life steps in order to rediscover their essential and true ‘I am’. To rediscover the true and genuine ‘I am’ might then result in an appreciation that my ‘I’ is as valued as that of everyone else.

References: Allen, David (Editor), 2016, The Neville Goddard Collection. Shanon Allen, USA. Bradshaw, John, 1990, Homecoming, Reclaiming & Championing Your Inner Child. Piatkus, London. Brown, Raymond E., S.S., Fitzmyer, Joseph A., S.J., Murphy, Roland E., O.Carm., (Editors), 1968, The Jerome Biblical Commentary, Geoffrey Chapman, London and Dublin. if one is to believe your abilities and qualities are ‘fixed’ and unchangeable, then the attitude which may prevail is that there Burns, Rita J., 1983, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers. Michael is no room for personal growth. In such cases, a person with Glazier, Inc., Wilmington, Delaware. a ‘fixed’ mindset become the ‘victims of outside forces’ (p. Dweck, Dr. Carol S., 2012, Mindset, Changing the way you 102) and fail to benefit from their own innate talents. Dweck think to fulfil your potential. Robinson, London. observed that great leaders and thinkers are not necessarily born but become who they are with effort and a more positive Good News Bible, 1994 edition, The Bible Societies/harper self-concept (p. 141). She stated that a great part of learning Collins Publishers Ltd., UK. and growth is the enjoyment and the engagement with the Hay, Louise L., 1991, The Power is Within You. Eden Grove process, both often lacking in the one with a ‘fixed’ mindset. A Editions, London. person with a ‘fixed’ mindset is not open to such experiences. It may be argued, therefore, that, as one grows, one becomes Matthew Henry’s Bible Commentary, available on https://www. more aware of one’s own potential and uniqueness which christianity.com/bible/commentary.php?com=mhc&b=2&c=3 , is integral to the divine self. Interestingly, Bradshaw also accessed 18th September 2018. stressed that healthy human life is ‘characterised by growth’ The New Jerusalem Bible, 1990Edition, Darton, Longman & (Ibid., pg34). Todd, London.

Discussion: Websites: The main thrust of this discussion is the belief that ‘I am me’ I Am Presence: Who Are You? – The Identity of The True Self. and I do not need to become someone else in order to seek Available on https://www.summitlighthouse.org/i-am-presence/ approval. ’I am me’ and I am good enough as I am, I do not Accessed 12/10/18 need to become someone else in order to be more valued or accepted by me or by anyone else. ‘I am me’, accept me Holland’s Theory of Career Choice and You. https://www. as I am, because I do not intend to change the ‘I am’ that is careerkey.org/choose-a-career/hollands-theory-of-career- within me for your satisfaction. I am me equals I acknowledge choice.html#.W8WngzQvxdg and https://www.careers.govt. my unique diverse nature, I am kind, I am good at …., etc. nz/assets/pages/docs/career-theory-model-holland-20170501. Yet, within this belief that I am me and that I will remain true pdf Both Accessed 15/10/18 to myself and to my own true nature, there is still room for personal growth. In this respect, those with a ‘growth’ mindset can remain true to their own sense of self yet aspire to be the

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any of them,” he said. “He’s the bridge between the east and the west. There is no limit because he has the guidance. I don’t know yet exactly what form this will take. But he is the GENERALISE, Chosen One.” This second story you also probably know. This boy’s mother DON’T SPECIALISE: was a coach, but she never coached him. He would kick a ball around with her when he learned to walk. As a child, he played squash with his father on Sundays. He dabbled WHY FOCUSING in skiing, wrestling, swimming and skateboarding. He played basketball, handball, tennis, table tennis and badminton over TOO NARROWLY his neighbour’s fence, and soccer at school. IS BAD FOR US His parents had no particular athletic aspirations for him. They encouraged him to try a wide array of sports. He didn’t much mind what sport he was playing, so long as it included a ball. Though his mother taught tennis, she decided against working with him. “He would have just upset me anyway,” she said. David Epstein “He tried out every strange stroke and certainly never returned a ball normally. That is simply no fun for a mother.” Rather than Let’s start with a couple of stories from the world of sports. pushy, his parents were, if anything, “pully”, a Sports Illustrated This first one, you probably know … The boy’s father could tell writer would later observe. Nearing his teens, the boy began to something was different. At seven months, he gave his son a gravitate more toward tennis, and “if they nudged him at all, it putter to fool around with, and the boy dragged it everywhere was to stop taking tennis so seriously”. he went in his little circular baby walker. At 10 months, he climbed down from his high chair, trundled over to a golf As a teenager, he was good enough to warrant an interview club that had been cut down to size for him, and imitated the with the local newspaper. His mother was appalled to read swing he had been watching in the garage. Because the father that, when asked what he would buy with a hypothetical couldn’t yet talk with his son, he drew pictures to show the boy first prize money from playing tennis, her son answered “A how to place his hands on the club. Mercedes”. She was relieved when the reporter let her listen to a recording of the interview and they realised there had been At two, he went on US television and used a club that was tall a mistake: the boy had said “mehr CDs” in Swiss-German. He enough to reach his shoulder to drive a ball past an admiring simply wanted “more CDs”. Bob Hope. That same year, he entered his first tournament, and won the 10-and-under division. There was no time to waste. The boy was competitive, no doubt. But when his tennis By three, the boy was learning how to play out of a sandtrap, instructors decided to move him up to a group with older and his father was mapping out his destiny. He knew his son players, he asked to move back so he could stay with his had been chosen for this, and that it was his duty to guide him. friends. After all, part of the fun was hanging around after his He started prepping his three-year-old to handle the inevitable lessons to gab about music, or pro wrestling, or soccer. media attention that would come. He quizzed the boy, playing the role of reporter, teaching him how to give curt answers, never to offer more than precisely what was asked. When the boy was four, his father could drop him off at a golf course at nine in the morning and pick him up eight hours later, sometimes with the money he had won from those foolish enough to doubt him. At eight, the son beat his father for the first time. The father didn’t mind, because he was convinced that his boy was singularly talented, and that he was uniquely equipped to help him. He had been an outstanding athlete himself, and against enormous odds. He played baseball in college when he was the only black player in the entire conference. He understood people, and discipline; a sociology major, he served in Vietnam as a member of the army’s elite Green Berets, and later taught psychological warfare to future officers. He knew he hadn’t By the time he finally gave up other sports to focus on tennis, done his best with three kids from a previous marriage, but other kids had long since been working with strength coaches, now he could see that he had been given a second chance sports psychologists and nutritionists. But it didn’t seem to to do the right thing with number four. And it was all going hamper his development in the long run. In his mid-30s, an according to plan. age by which even legendary tennis players are typically The boy was already famous by the time he reached Stanford retired, he would still be ranked world No 1. University, and soon his father opened up about his importance. In 2006, Tiger Woods and Roger Federer met for the first time, His son would have a larger impact than Nelson Mandela, than when both were at the apex of their powers. Woods flew in on his Gandhi, than Buddha, he insisted. “He has a larger forum than

14 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER private jet to watch the final of the US Open tennis tournament. was failing for a lack of following the Tiger Woods path of It made Federer especially nervous, but he still won, for the unwavering specialisation. Moving high-ranking government third year in a row. Woods joined him in the locker room for a officials between departments, he wrote, “is no less absurd champagne celebration. “I’ve never spoken with anybody who than rotating Tiger Woods from golf to baseball to football to was so familiar with the feeling of being invincible,” Federer hockey.” would later say. They quickly became friends. But Great Britain’s massive success at the 2012 Olympics, Still, the contrast between them was not lost on Federer. “His after decades of middling performances, was bolstered by story is completely different from mine,” he told a biographer programmes set up specifically to recruit adults to try new in 2006. “Even as a kid, his goal was to break the record sports and to create a pipeline for late developers – “slow for winning the most majors. I was just dreaming of just once bakers”, as one of the officials behind the programme meeting Boris Becker, or being able to play at Wimbledon described them. It turns out that the idea of an athlete, even some time.” one who wants to become elite, following a Federer path and trying out different sports is not so absurd. It seems pretty unusual for a child with “pully” parents, and who first took his sport lightly, to grow into a man who dominates Elite athletes at the peak of their abilities do spend more it like no one before him. Unlike Tiger, thousands of kids, at time on deliberate practice than their near-elite peers. But least, had a head start on Roger. Tiger’s incredible upbringing scientists have found that, at a younger age, those who go on to become elite athletes typically devote less time to deliberate practice in the activity in which they will eventually become experts. Instead, they undergo what researchers call a “sampling period”. They play a variety of sports, usually in The community of the world’s most an unstructured or lightly structured environment; they gain a popular sport, football, was the loudest range of physical proficiencies from which they can draw; they learn about their own abilities and proclivities; and only later do they focus in on one area. The title of one study of athletes in individual sports proclaimed “late specialisation” as “the key to success”; another was titled Making It to the Top in Team has been at the heart of a batch of bestselling books on Sports: Start Later, Intensify, and Be Determined. the development of expertise, one of which was a parenting When I began to write about these studies a few years ago, manual written by Tiger’s father, Earl. Tiger was not merely I was met with thoughtful criticism, but also denial. Maybe in playing golf. He was engaging in what is often described as some other sport, fans would often say, but that’s not true “deliberate practice”, the only kind that counts in the oft-quoted of our sport. The community of the world’s most popular sport, “10,000 hours rule” of expertise, which states that the number football, was the loudest. And then, as if on cue, in late 2014 of accumulated hours of highly specialised training is the sole a team of German scientists published a study showing that factor in skill development, no matter the domain. members of their national team, which had just won the World Deliberate practice, according to the study of 30 violinists that Cup, were typically late specialisers who didn’t play more spawned the rule, occurs when learners are “given explicit organised soccer than amateur-league players until age 22 instructions about the best method,” individually supervised by or later. They spent more of their childhood and adolescence an instructor, supplied with “immediate informative feedback playing non-organised football and other sports. Another and knowledge of the results of their performance” and football study published two years later matched players for “repeatedly perform the same or similar tasks”. Reams of work skill at age 11 and tracked them for two years. Those who on expertise-development shows that elite athletes spend participated in more sports and non-organised football, “but more time in highly technical, deliberate practice each week not more organised soccer practice/training”, improved more than those who plateau at lower levels. by age 13. Findings like these have been echoed in a huge array of sports, from hockey to volleyball. Tiger has come to symbolise the idea that the quantity of deliberate practice determines success – and its corollary, that The professed necessity of hyperspecialisation forms the core the practice must start as early as possible. But the push to of a vast, successful and sometimes well-meaning marketing focus early and narrowly extends well beyond sports. We are machine, in sport and beyond. In reality, the Roger Federer often taught that the more competitive and complicated the path to sports stardom is far more prevalent than the Tiger world gets, the more specialised we all must become (and Woods path, but those athletes’ stories are much more quietly the earlier we must start). Our best-known icons of success, told, if they are told at all. Some of their names you know, but such as Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg, are lauded for their their backgrounds you probably don’t. precocity and their headstarts. Across different fields, it has In the 2018 Super Bowl, for instance, a quarterback who had become more and more common to exalt increasingly narrow been drafted into professional baseball before football (Tom focus. Oncologists no longer specialise in cancer, but rather Brady), faced off against one who participated in football, in cancer related to a single organ – and the trend advances basketball, baseball and karate, and had chosen between each year. Surgeon and writer Atul Gawande pointed out that college basketball and football (Nick Foles). Later that very when doctors joke about left-ear surgeons, “we have to check same month, Czech athlete Ester Ledecká became the first to be sure they don’t exist”. woman ever to win gold in two different sports (skiing and In the 10,000-hours-themed bestseller Bounce, UK snowboarding) at the same Winter Olympics. journalist Matthew Syed suggested that the British government When she was younger, Ledecká participated in multiple 15 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER sports (she still plays beach volleyball and windsurfs), range – and that there are benefits to doing so. I discovered focused on school and never rushed to be No 1 in teenage research showing that highly credentialed experts can competition categories. Just after her feat, Ukrainian boxer become so narrow-minded that they actually get worse Vasyl Lomachenko set a record for the fewest fights needed to with experience, even while becoming more confident (a win world titles in three different weight classes. Lomachenko, dangerous combination). And I was stunned when cognitive who took four years off boxing as a kid to learn traditional psychologists I spoke with led me to an enormous and too- Ukrainian dance, reflected, “I was doing so many different often ignored body of work demonstrating that learning itself is sports as a young boy – gymnastics, basketball, football, best done slowly to accumulate lasting knowledge, even when tennis – and I think, ultimately, everything came together with that means performing poorly on tests of immediate progress. all those different kinds of sports to enhance my footwork.” That is, the most effective learning looks inefficient – it looks like falling behind. In 2014, I included some of the findings about late specialisation in sports in the afterword of my first book, The Sports Gene. The following year, I got an invitation to talk about that research before an unlikely audience –not athletes or coaches, but military veterans. In preparation, I looked through scientific journals for work on specialisation and career-swerving outside of the sports world – and I was struck by what I found. One study showed that early-career specialisers earned more than others after college, but that later specialisers made up for the headstart by finding work that better suited their skills and personalities. I found many studies showing how technology inventors had benefited from proactively sacrificing a modicum of depth for breadth as their careers progressed. There was a nearly identical finding in a study of artistic creators. I also began to realise that some of the people whose work I deeply admired from afar – from Duke Ellington (who shunned music lessons to focus on drawing and baseball as a kid) Starting something new in middle age might look that way, to Maryam Mirzakhani (who dreamed of becoming a novelist too. Mark Zuckerberg famously noted that “young people are and instead became the first woman to win math’s most famous just smarter”. And yet a tech founder who is 50 years old is prize, the Fields Medal) – seemed to have more Federer than nearly twice as likely to start a blockbuster company as one Woods in their development stories. who is 30, and the 30-year-old has a better shot than someone of 20. Researchers at Northwestern University, MIT and the In my talk to the small group of military veterans, I mostly stuck US Census Bureau studied new tech companies and showed to sports. I touched on the other findings only briefly, but the that among the fastest-growing startups, the average age of a audience seized on that material. All were late specialisers founder was 45 when the company was launched. or career-changers, and as they filed up one after another to introduce themselves after the talk, I could tell that all were Zuckerberg was 22 when he made his pronouncement about at least moderately concerned, and some were borderline the superior intelligence of young people. It was in his interest ashamed of it. to broadcast that message, just as it is in the interest of people who run youth sports leagues to claim that year-round They had been brought together by the Pat Tillman devotion to one activity is necessary for success, never mind Foundation, which, in the spirit of the late NFL player who the evidence to the contrary. But the drive to specialise goes left a professional football career to become an army ranger, beyond that. It infects not just individuals, but entire systems, provides scholarships to veterans, active-duty military, and as each specialised group sees a smaller and smaller part of military spouses who are undergoing career changes or going a large puzzle. back to school. They were all scholarship recipients, former paratroopers and translators who were becoming teachers, One revelation in the aftermath of the 2008 global financial scientists, engineers, and entrepreneurs. crisis was the degree of segregation within big banks. Legions of specialised groups optimising risk for their own tiny pieces They brimmed with enthusiasm, but they also seemed a of the big picture created a catastrophic whole. To make little anxious about the fact that their LinkedIn profiles didn’t matters worse, responses to the crisis betrayed a dizzying show the linear progression toward a particular career they degree of specialisation-induced perversity. A US federal had been told employers wanted. They were nervous about government programme launched in 2009 incentivised banks starting graduate school alongside younger (sometimes to lower monthly mortgage payments for homeowners who much younger) students, or changing lanes later than their were struggling but still able to make partial payments. peers. Although they had been busy accumulating unique life and leadership experiences, somehow, in their minds, this A nice idea, but here’s how it worked out in practice: a bank arm advantage had morphed into a liability. that specialised in mortgage-lending started the homeowner on lower payments; an arm of the same bank that specialised Over time, as I delved further into studies about learning in foreclosures then noticed that the homeowner was suddenly and specialisation, I came across more and more evidence paying less, declared them in default, and seized the home. that it takes time to develop personal and professional

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“No one imagined silos like that inside banks,” a government purview again, designing a training programme in an attempt adviser said later. Overspecialisation can lead to collective to give others a chance to deviate from the Tiger path. “This tragedy even when every individual separately takes the most may be the most important thing I will ever do in my life,” he reasonable course of action. told me. Specialised healthcare professionals have developed their Learning about the advantages of breadth and delayed own versions of the “if all you have is a hammer, everything specialisation has changed the way I see myself and the looks like a nail” problem. Interventional cardiologists have world. The research pertains to every stage of life, from grown so used to treating chest pain with stents – metal tubes the development of children in maths, music and sports, that pry open blood vessels – that they do so reflexively even to students fresh out of college trying to find their way, to in cases where voluminous research has proven that they are midcareer professionals in need of a change and would-be inappropriate or dangerous. A recent study found that cardiac retirees looking for a new vocation after moving on from their patients were less likely to die if they were admitted during a previous one. national cardiology meeting, when thousands of cardiologists The challenge we all face is how to maintain the benefits of were away; the researchers suggested it could be because breadth, diverse experience, interdisciplinary thinking and common treatments of dubious effect were less likely to be delayed concentration in a world that increasingly incentivises performed. or even demands hyperspecialisation. While it is true that there Arturo Casadevall, an internationally renowned scientist, are areas that require individuals with Tiger’s precocity and believes that increasing specialisation has created a “system clarity of purpose, as complexity increases – as technology of parallel trenches” in the quest for innovation. Everyone is spins the world into vaster webs of interconnected systems in digging deeper into their own trench and rarely standing up to which each individual only sees a small part – we also need look in the next trench over, even if the solution to their problem more Rogers: people who start broad and embrace diverse happens to reside there. Casadevall is taking it upon himself experiences and perspectives while they progress. People to attempt to despecialise the training of future researchers; he with range. hopes that eventually it will spread to training in every field. He Adapted from Range: How Generalists Triumph in a Specialised profited immensely from cultivating range in his own life, even World by David Epstein, published by Macmillan and available as he was pushed to specialise. And now he is broadening his at guardianbookshop.com

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al tick all the boxes for being boarding-school survivors. For socially privileged children are forced into a deal not of their choosing, where a normal family-based childhood is traded Why boarding schools for the hothousing of entitlement. Prematurely separated from home and family, from love and touch, they must speedily produce bad leaders reinvent themselves as self-reliant pseudo-adults. Paradoxically, they then struggle to properly mature, since the child who was not allowed to grow up organically gets stranded, as it were, inside them. In consequence, an abandoned child complex within such adults ends up running the show. This is why many British politicians appear so boyish. They are also reluctant to open their ranks to women, who are strangers to them and unconsciously held responsible for their abandonment by their mothers. With about two-thirds of the current cabinet from such a background, the political implications of this syndrome are huge – because it’s the NICK DUFFELL children inside the men running the country who are effectively in charge. Boarding children invariably construct a survival personality that endures long after school and operates strategically. In Britain, the link between private boarding education and On rigid timetables, in rule-bound institutions, they must be leadership is gold-plated. If their parents can afford it, children ever alert to staying out of trouble. Crucially, they must not are sent away from home to walk a well-trodden path that look unhappy, childish or foolish – in any way vulnerable – or leads straight from boarding school through Oxbridge to they will be bullied by their peers. So they dissociate from all high office in institutions such as the judiciary, the army, the these qualities, project them out on to others, and develop City and, especially, government. Our prime minister [David duplicitous personalities that are on the run, which is why ex- Cameron] was only seven when he was sent away to board boarders make the best spies. at Heatherdown preparatory school in Berkshire. Like so many of the men who hold leadership roles in Britain, he learned to Now attached to this internal structure instead of a parent, the adapt his young character to survive both the loss of his family boarding child survives, but takes into adulthood a permanent and the demands of boarding school culture. The psychological unconscious anxiety and will rarely develop what Daniel impact of these formative experiences on Cameron and other Goleman calls emotional intelligence. In adulthood he sticks to boys who grow up to occupy positions of great power and the same tactics: whenever he senses a threat of being made responsibility cannot be overstated. It leaves them ill-prepared for relationships in the adult world and the nation with a cadre of leaders who perpetuate a culture of elitism, bullying and BOARDING CHILDREN INVARIABLY misogyny affecting the whole of society. CONSTRUCT A SURVIVAL PERSONALITY Nevertheless, this golden path is as sure today as it was THAT ENDURES LONG AFTER SCHOOL AND 100 years ago, when men from such backgrounds led us OPERATES STRATEGICALLY. into a disastrous war; it is familiar, sometimes mocked, but taken for granted. But it is less well known that costly, elite boarding consistently turns out people who appear much to look foolish, he will strike. We see this in Cameron’s over- more competent than they actually are. They are particularly reaction to Angela Eagle MP, less than a year into his new deficient in non-rational skills, such as those needed to sustain job. “Calm down, dear!” the PM patronisingly insisted, as if she relationships, and are not, in fact, well-equipped to be leaders were the one upset and not he. The opposite benches loved in today’s world it, of course, howling “Flashman!” (the public school bully from I have been doing psychotherapy with ex-boarders for 25 Tom Brown’s Schooldays), but they never take on the cause of years and I am a former boarding-school teacher and boarder. these leadership defects. My pioneering study of privileged abandonment always sparks Bullying is inevitable and endemic in 24/7 institutions full of controversy: so embedded in British life is boarding that many abandoned and frightened kids. Ex-boarders’ partners often struggle to see beyond the elitism and understand its impact. report that it ends up ruining home life, many years later. The prevalence of institutionalised abuse is finally emerging to Bullying pervades British society, especially in politics and public scrutiny, but the effects of normalised parental neglect the media, but, like boarding, we normalise it. When, in 2011, are more widespread and much less obvious. Am I saying, Jeremy Clarkson ranted that he would have striking public- then, that David Cameron, and the majority of our ruling elite, sector workers shot, he was even defended by Cameron – it were damaged by boarding? was apparently a bit of fun. No prizes for guessing where both It’s complex. My studies show that children survive boarding men learned their styles. And no wonder that the House of by cutting off their feelings and constructing a defensively Commons, with its adversarial architecture of Victorian Gothic organised self that severely limits their later lives. Cameron, – just like a public school chapel – runs on polarised debate Boris Johnson, Jeremy Hunt, Andrew Mitchell, Oliver Letwin et and bullying.

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Strategic survival has many styles: bullying is one; others include Recent evidence from neuroscience experts shows what a poor keeping your head down, becoming a charming bumbler, or training for leaderships this actually is. In short, you cannot keeping an incongruently unruffled smile in place, like health make good decisions without emotional information (Professor secretary Jeremy Hunt, former head boy at Charterhouse. Antonio Damasio); nor grow a flexible brain without good In a remarkable 1994 BBC documentary called The Making of attachments (Dr Sue Gerhardt); nor interpret facial signals if Them, whose title I borrowed for my first book, young boarders your heart has had to close down (Professor Stephen Porges); were discreetly filmed over their first few weeks at prep school. nor see the big picture if your brain has been fed on a strict Viewers can witness the “strategic survival personality” in the diet of rationality (Dr Iain McGilchrist). These factors underpin process of being built. “Boarding school,” says nine-year-old Will Hutton’s view that “the political judgments of the Tory party Freddy, puffing himself up, putting on his Very Serious Face have, over the centuries, been almost continuously wrong”. and staring at the camera, “has changed me, and the one With survival but not empathy on his school curriculum from thing I can do now is get used [to it]”. This false independence, age seven, Cameron is unlikely to make good decisions based this display of pseudo-adult seriousness is as evident in the on making relationships in Europe, as John Major could. He can theatrical concern of Cameron as it was in Tony Blair. It talk of leading Europe, but not of belonging to it. Ex-boarder leaders cannot conceive of communal solutions, because they haven’t had enough belonging at home to understand what it means. Instead, they are limited to esprit de corps with their own kind. In order to boost his standing with the rightwingers in his party, Cameron still thinks he can bully for concessions, make more supposedly “robust” vetos.

“THE SOCIAL PRIVILEGE OF BOARDING IS PSYCHOLOGICALLY DOUBLE-EDGED”

His European counterparts don’t operate like this. Angela displays the strategic duplicity learned in childhood; it is hard Merkel has held multiple fragile coalitions together through to get rid of, and, disastrously, deceives even its creator. difficult times by means of her skill in relationships and collaboration. Though deadlocked at home, Barack Obama The social privilege of boarding is psychologically double- impressed both sides of British politics and in 2009 entered edged: it both creates shame that prevents sufferers from the hostile atmosphere of the Kremlin to befriend the then- acknowledging their problems, as well as unconscious president Dmitry Medvedev and make headway on a difficult entitlement that explains why ex-boarder leaders are brittle disarmament treaty. In a subsequent meeting with the real and defensive while still projecting confidence. Boris is so power behind the throne, Obama invited Vladimir Putin to supremely confident that he needs neither surname nor adult expound for an hour on what hadn’t worked in recent Russian- haircut; he trusts his buffoonery to distract the public from what American relationships, before responding. Despite their elitist Conrad Black called “a sly fox disguised as a teddy bear”. education, and because of it, our own “wounded leaders” can’t On the steps of St Paul’s, Boris commanded the Occupy manage such statesmanship. movement: “In the name of God and Mammon, go!” Was it a lark – Boris doing Monty Python? Or a coded message, To change our politics, we’ll have to change our education announcing someone who, for 10 years, heard the King James system. Today, most senior clinicians recognise boarding Bible read in chapel at Eton? Those who don’t recognise this syndrome, several of whom recently signed a letter to the language, it suggests, have no right to be here, so they should Observer calling for the end of early boarding. Its elitism ought just clear off. to motivate the left. The Attlee government intended to disband the public schools, but not even Wilson’s dared to do so. There’s This anachronistic entitlement cannot easily be renounced: a cash problem: boarding is worth billions and has a massive it compensates for years without love, touch or family, for a lobby. Unlike most other European countries, our state does personality under stress, for the lack of emotional, relational not contribute a per capita sum towards private education, so and sexual maturation. In my new book, Wounded Leaders, dismantling these schools, which still enjoy charitable status, I trace the history of British elitism and the negative attitude would be costly. But can we really afford to sacrifice any more towards children to colonial times and what I call the “rational children for the sake of second-rate leadership? man project”, whose Victorian boarding schools were industrial power stations churning out stoic, superior leaders for the Wounded Leaders: British Elitism and the Entitlement Illusion – empire. a Psychohistory is published by Lone Arrow Press, £20. From The Guardian 2014

19 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER Photo Parade

20 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER Photo Parade

21 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER America’s Job Listings Have Gone Off the Deep End Amanda Mull

Are you a code sensei? A customer-service rock star? Do you Ian Siegel, the CEO of the online job marketplace ZipRecruiter. have a passion for sales? Will you devote your life to conference Older, more experienced professionals are generally turned off by calls, leaving your family and friends behind while you camp out employers looking for extremists, as are parents. “You’re going to under your desk, ready to dial in at any time? get mostly young men,” Siegel says. If the answer to all those questions is “no”—or even a nervous, Building a team made up exclusively of wild-eyed work fanatics hesitant smile—then hopefully you don’t need to look for a new isn’t exactly a sound managerial practice, either. “What research job anytime soon. If you do, get ready to convince prospective shows is that many things at the extreme are actually not good employers that you are a success-obsessed results ninja, whatever for performance,” says Connie Wanberg, an industrial and that means. organizational psychologist at the University of Minnesota’s Carlson School of Management. Extreme personalities can be difficult to A generation ago, American job seekers might have opened manage or integrate into the varied elements of workplace culture. a newspaper to find want ads with perfunctory explanations of Applicants usually need to be good collaborators or team players desired skills, such as carpentry or customer service. But in the in addition to skilled ninjas, Wanberg says. past two decades, a changing labour market, combined with the internet’s ability to make things functionally more efficient Siegel points out that the hypercharged language is also poorly but existentially far worse, has dramatically transformed how suited to the digital nature of most modern job searching, where 70 American companies recruit prospective employees. The result is percent of résumés submitted via online job listings or uploaded the obnoxious state of the modern job listing, which is often short to job boards are going to be screened by algorithms looking for on details and long on silly demands. keywords. “When you say ‘coding ninja,’ you’re not going to match against ‘java developer.’ If you say ‘spreadsheet guru,’ you’re Although this trend has some roots in start-up culture, it has spread going to miss the people with ‘Excel expertise.’” to virtually all American industries and far beyond the bounds of urban office work. Alley, a co-working space in New York, seeks a Overall, the nature of the American career has changed significantly social-media and marketing manager at the company who is “one in the past generation, Cappelli says: “In the days of the Great part visionary, one part online warrior, one part pop-culture guru, Corporation, about 10 percent of vacancies were filled externally, a dash of precocious energy, mixed with a little lyrical whimsy, and those were mostly entry-level jobs from college recruiting. and served with a shot of espresso.” A listing for an Atlanta-based Everything after that was promotion from within. Now we fill about “customer support hero” at the software company Autodesk wants two-thirds of vacancies from the outside.” Hiring managers are to hear from you if you’re “a ninja with your keyboard” who has “a competing in what Siegel calls a “war” for the best talent, and passion for incredible customer service.” they’re hiring for more types of positions within their institutions than any of their predecessors ever had to. These listings weren’t hard to find. A short scroll through a popular job board revealed thousands of results with similar keywords. More than ever, it seems, hiring managers are looking for extremists: You can’t just be willing to do the job. You must “hypercharged language is also evince an all-consuming horniness for menial corporate tasks. In an American labour market where wages are stagnant and many poorly suited to the digital nature workers feel their jobs seeping into their personal time, such of most modern job searching” demands only create even more anxiety and dread for Americans looking for a new gig. Siegel says he understands that employers are trying to stand According to Peter Cappelli, the director of the Wharton School’s out by being cutesy. He advises employers to go instead with Center for Human Resources at the University of Pennsylvania, more technically precise language in their job descriptions and modern job listings tend to perpetuate the myth that only slavishly focus their creativity on describing the workplace itself. “It’s an devoted employees are valuable. But this notion often makes opportunity to say, ‘We’re a family-oriented business, walking workplaces worse, he says, “[Hiring managers] are not thinking distance to many restaurants, a pet-friendly office,’” he says. much about the culture of organizations. Folks are stuck in this idea of just wanting a bunch of ‘A’ players or the really great Of course, to brag about being a great employer, it helps to be individual performers.” one. Siegel sees plenty of resistance to offering things applicants might actually want—namely, money and flexibility. In a survey Companies that use these job descriptors sometimes realize they ZipRecruiter conducted last year, he says, most employers might sound odd. But some companies contend that the language said they were focusing all their recruiting efforts on job listings is crucial for team culture, not ignorant of it. “The ‘Customer Service themselves. “Instead of doing things like lowering the skills Hero’ job title isn’t to stand out from other companies; it’s not required or improving the pay, it was all about how much they clickbait for talent,” Shaya Fidel, who works in human resources were spending on more job boards or more recruiting solutions,” at Autodesk, told me over email. “When we first created the ‘Hero’ Siegel says. “There was a real resistance to responding to the position, we wanted the job title to reinforce that customer support market that was telling you that if you want to get good talent, you is the lifeblood of everything we do.” have to improve your offer.” If creative language is in fact a window into a company’s culture, In other words, few people seem to want to do the duties of a rock the tireless-ninja mind-set still might hurt some workers more than star if they’re not going to get paid like one. others, though. “You wind up with a combination of a gender skew and an age skew when you use these fanciful terms,” says From The Atlantic, June 2019

22 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER Addiction, Alcoholism and the Adult Children of Alcoholics: The Loss of Self with Some Jungian and Adlerian Insights by Professor Michael L. O’Rourke

as a judgement by those who do, a threat to their own group standards and sense of cohesion centred on shared drinking My soul is like a house with a few wisps of experiences” (Brown, 1995, p5). Up until very recently, it was smoke coming from the chimney. The passer-by culturally acceptable to drink and drive. Penalties were minor does not know what a great fire is blazing within. or nonexistent. In fact, we excused some obnoxious and Van Gogh destructive behaviour and we put it down to the demon drink: “It was the alcohol, not me!” We have recently introduced stringent legislation in regards to drinking and driving. Drinking Introduction: behaviours that were so recently legitimate, even charming For thousands of years, alcohol has played an important and funny, are now unacceptable. Yet, ambivalence remains. role in religion, science, medicine, politics, economics and We continue to wrestle with social ambivalence, which results social mores. The ancient Egyptians, Jews, and Greeks all in social and professional controversy. We still don’t know what prescribed alcohol for medical purposes and thus imbued it is too much alcohol to imbibe at the wedding or to honour the with a strong positive value. Yet the role, meaning, values, victors of a particular sporting occasion. and beliefs attached to drinking and to problems with drinking have varied tremendously over the centuries. The Jews, for The emergence of the disease notion of alcoholism in recent example, came to reject alcohol consumption as a part of years has created a change in attitudes and values and the social intercourse: they equated drunkenness with “outsiders” need for treatment beyond the exercise of will has to be and a negative lack of control (Brown, 1995, p5). With the recognised. Simultaneously, interest in addiction, alcoholism coming of Christianity, medicine and religion were integrated: and its control has expanded into the fields of psychiatry and “alcohol was prescribed in the religious sacrament of the medicine. This disease concept first labelled by the American Eucharist and by monks as a treatment for all diseases” (Brown, Medical Association in 1956 has required radical changes in 1995, p5). Various political regimes, social mores, scientific the most basic beliefs long standing in the culture and out of and technological developments, and even geography have tune with long established historical values. The significance determined a given culture’s drinking behaviour, making it of the disease model lies in the acknowledgement of loss of difficult to generalize about the use of alcohol. Stephanie control and the attribution of this loss to a disease process Brown (1995, p 5) considers: rather than to a failure of the will. A disease model lessens the stigma attached to alcoholism, so individuals no longer need to deny they cannot control their drinking behaviour. With this defensive need removed, many of the most severe pathological When people drink (wine with meals is sanctioned symptoms, such as paranoia and hostility, disappear (Brown, in Italian society; drunkenness is not), how much 1995, p 10). they drink ( intoxication is valued in Irish society as an expression of group cohesiveness and as a 1.1 The Psychology of Addiction: gauge of masculinity), and what they drink (political An Addictive personality is created from the illness of addiction. and economic factors in German society have This personality does not exist prior to the illness of addiction determined beer to be the preferred leverage) tend to rather it emerges from the addictive process. Addiction is a differentiate, rather than unify human behaviour with relationship with an object or event that takes place within regard to alcohol. the person; in natural relationships there is a connecting with others, an act of giving and an act of receiving. In addiction there is only an act of taking. Addiction changes people in In American society, drinking is the norm. It is a right, an permanent ways. It can alter a person’s personality. It grows entitlement, and a symbol of the good life. “Individuals are expected to drink and to control it according to the particular social demands of the moment, which vary. The emphasis on the ability to control is paramount. There is no room for the person who, for whatever reasons, cannot regulate intake according to changing social expectations and norms” (Brown, 1995, p5). Indeed, non-drinkers including recovering alcoholics and those who either cannot drink because of health reasons or prefer not to, frequently are seen as socially different and not willing to be part of the group or for having a morally superior attitude. “The choice not to drink may be felt 23 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER and develops within. It is a process and a set of experiences because most are grateful to have a precious gift returned- that indicate change. It is a slow, “progressive illness” with four sunsets, nature, laughter, genuine relationships with others; phases from “normal drinking” to “learning the mood swing”, indeed, the support from others are all treasures which are then “seeking the mood swing” to “drinking to be normal” cherished once again and known as network therapy in the (Thombs, 1999, p64) As addiction develops, it becomes a way U.S. with very encouraging results (Levin, 1995, p 244). of life. The mood change, the highs and lows, the illusion of The Addict’s Behaviour is one of lies, denial, rationalisations, control, the illusion of comfort and the illusion of perfection are projections, blaming, ritual behaviours, distrust, loss of self all there: these are experiences which are often very enjoyable esteem, withdrawal to a secret world in which he/she lives and very intense (Nakken, 1996, p2-18; Twerski, 1997, p37-40) out an addictive lifestyle (Twerski, 1997, p 41- 50; Thombs, 1999, p63-70).The person emotionally, mentally, spiritually and There are natural relationships of social connectedness that physically breaks down under the stress and pain produced people need to turn to for support, nurturing, love, emotional by the addiction. Addicts are now very unsure of themselves and spiritual growth. These relationships come from family and and often start to lose some of their ability to manipulate. The friends, a spiritual higher power, self, from the work community self is now without energy, vitality, without soul. The self has and home community. Indeed, the recovering community plays emotionally died. Impaired thinking, indefinable fears become a major role in understanding the self and in providing the step increasingly manifest. Suicidal thoughts, hate, shame, are ladder for the addict back to mental health and wellness. As common. Black and White thinking, rigidity of life-style adds for self, the ability to love oneself and see ourselves as one a level of comfort to the addict’s life. Addictive logic can also resource we can turn to in times of difficulty is a major insight start to break down with complete defeat admitted. Jeykll and worthy of consideration. People who have difficulty forming Hyde have fought for superiority and there is now one clear and developing relationships within these groups, turn to winner-the addict always wins! other types of relationships. The addictive personality is thus created from the illness of addiction (Peele, 1988, p67).This Charles Whitfield in his wonderful book, Healing the Child personality does not exist prior to the illness rather it emerges Within 1987, uses the following terms interchangeably: “Real from the addictive process over long periods of time. The Self Self, True Self, Child Within, Divine Child and Higher Self, and the Addict are now two personalities battling for control simply the self. It has also been called our Deepest Self, our and supremacy. The Self represents the “normal human side” Inner Core” (Whitfield, 1987, p9). It is giving, expansive, loving, of the addicted person while the addict represents the new accepting of self and others, trusting, self-indulgent, intuitive, formation that is consumed and transformed by the addiction. genuine, vulnerable. It is the Child Within. It surrenders to (Nakken, 1996, p31). The Addict is always the winner in this itself, to others and ultimately to the world. By contrast, our Jeykll and Hyde struggle. false self or co-dependent addict self, unauthentic or public self, are terms which are interchangeable. Our false self is We are all familiar with the personality type of the dry drunk, a cover-up. It is inhibited, contracting and fearful. “ It is our cunning, baffling and powerful and these are words that we egocentric ego and superego, forever planning and plodding, use to describe the addictive personality. It is the addictive continually selfish and withholding. It is envious, critical, personality and the addictive relationship inside oneself that idealized, blaming, shaming and perfectionist” (Whitfield, the recovering person needs to acknowledge and monitor. 1987, p11). Because our co-dependent self needs to withdraw Over time, the addict becomes the dominant personality; a and to be in control, Whitfield (1987, p12), suggests that “ personality change begins to take place; these changes are it sacrifices nurturing or being nurtured. It cannot surrender. subtle and happen gradually over time and helps to give us It is self-righteous and attempts to block information coming an understanding of the dangerous seductive nature of the from the unconscious. It is our public self who we think others addiction process. Addiction offers the illusion of fulfilling a and eventually even we think we should be”. Whitfield (1987, deep, lonely emptiness which is the very void in the inner soul. p12) reminds us: “Most of the time, in the role of our false or This void could be caused by life’s failures, poor relationship co-dependent self, we feel uncomfortable, numb, empty or in a skills, negativity and mistrust of others, a lack of spiritual contrived state. We do not feel real, complete, whole or sane. meaning in life, people who do not know how to trust who have At one level or another, we sense that something is wrong, been treated badly by others. (Nakken, 199, p34-36) something is missing”. This false or co-dependent self is our Belonging, social embeddedness and meaning are lost as addict who has won the war. A.W. Schaef suggests that addiction progresses. Addiction is a direct assault against the “it is a disease that has many forms and expressions and self, the spirit or soul of the person suffering from the addiction. that grows out of a disease process that I call the addictive The longer the addiction goes on, the more spiritually isolated process. The addict and the addictive process is an unhealthy the person becomes. Relations with others become superficial. and abnormal disease process whose assumptions, beliefs, Our humanity is driven by soul, spirit, and a yearning for a behaviours, and lack of spiritual awareness lead to a process higher power. Soul keeps us glued together. It gives us a of nonliving which is progressive”(Schaef, 1986, p49). sense of who we are, where we come from and where we are going to. This is what is destroyed with addiction- this is the jewel, this is the treasure that is slowly suffocated as the addiction advances. We are talking here of a spiritual disease which we will succumb to and which eventually will lead to a spiritual death. Carl Jung reminds us that addiction is a direct assault against the self, the centre of personality. Many recovering addicts firmly grasp the spiritual aspect of recovery 1.2 Alcoholism and its Psychology - Understanding this

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Multifactorial Nature: a stunting of normal emotional development producing There are a number of definitions of alcoholism that are subsequent psychological problems. Friel and Friel are of a worthy of note in the literature review. Professor John Cooney similar view that many alcoholics have a genetic predisposition advances the following working definition: to becoming physically addicted to alcohol. “The brain and “Alcoholism is a primary chronic disease with genetic, blood chemistry of alcoholics is different than in non-alcoholics, psycho-social and environmental factors influencing its even before they started drinking. There is also pretty strong development and manifestation. The disease is often evidence that alcoholics metabolise alcohol differently than progressive and fatal. It is characterised by continuous nonalcoholics, producing an opiate-like substance in their or periodic impaired control over drinking, preoccupation brains after consuming alcohol” ( Friel and Friel,1988, p37). with the drug alcohol, use of alcohol despite adverse consequences and distortions in thinking, mostly denial” Psychological Factors, Psychosexual Factors: (Cooney, 1991, p3). Psychological factors are obviously of considerable importance He employs also another working definition by Marty Mann in causation. One theory put forward is that many alcoholics from her book, Primer on Alcoholism, which is succinct: “An possess a ‘low frustration threshold’. “I believe there is much alcoholic is a person whose drinking causes a continuing substance in this theory, from my own observation over the problem in any department of his/her life”. The World Health years of the striking rise in the frustration threshold of recovered Organisation considers the following notion of the disease: alcoholics. These individuals have now become much more “Alcoholics are those excessive drinkers whose dependence mature and better equipped to deal with the ‘slings and arrows upon alcohol has attained such a degree that it shows a of outrageous fortune’ (Cooney, 1991, p14). We know also noticeable mental disturbance or an interference with their that those who are immature, unstable and inadequate in terms bodily or mental health, their interpersonal relationships and of their personality, are more at risk of developing alcohol their smooth social and economic functioning, or shows the problems because of the temptation to turn to alcohol in an pro-dromal signs of such development”. Therefore, when we attempt to relieve tension and anxiety, enhance a poor self- talk about an alcoholic from all of the above definitions, we esteem and deal with depression. “Let me emphasise that I are not making any moral value judgement. We are merely am not stating that all alcoholics are immature, unstable and stating that the individual concerned, man or woman, lay or inadequate, but merely highlighting the vulnerability of those cleric, young or old, rich or poor, has reached a stage where possessing these personality traits where alcohol is concerned” alcohol is causing a continuing problem in some department (Cooney, 1991, p14). Various other personality disorders such of his or her life. The continuing problem may be evident in the as schizophrenic and socio-pathic types are over represented following areas: in the statistical data. Professor Cooney reminds us of an elaborate research study carried out with 300 men who had Physical Health: been hospitalised for treatment of alcoholism: “It was found Liver damage, vitamin deficiency, cirrhosis, irregular eating, that in a large percentage of cases, affective disorders (i.e. ulcers, broken sleep, night sweats, early morning shakes. excessive mood swings) had been important antecedent factors in determining their alcoholism” (Cooney, 1961, p15). Psychological: Psychosexual problems are of significance also: conditions Blaming others, irritability, aggression, inability to concentrate, such as impotence, frigidity, sexual preferences, unsure of self-pity, resentment of criticism, agitation when not drinking, affectional orientation, are all problems where alcohol can be remorse. used to allay anxiety and fears in this area.

Domestic Life and Family Context: Socio, Economic and Cultural Factors: Domestic Tension, Lack of Communication, Financial Problems, In terms of socio-cultural factors, French, Scandinavian and Loss of Sexual Drive, Withdrawal from activities other than Irish cultures have high levels of alcoholism. Jewish, Chinese drinking. and Italian cultures on the other hand apparently have a low prevalence of alcoholism. The meaning of alcohol in the Employment Context: society, early child-rearing practices, acceptance or rejection Absenteeism, Aggressiveness, Irregular work performance, of intoxication as a social practice within the culture are worthy Deterioration in personal appearance, Resentful of Criticism, of consideration and more advanced study. Heavy drinking On- the- Job Accidents. is frowned upon in Italian culture compared to our own saturated acceptance of alcohol in Irish society and culture. Genetic Factors: It is well established that those communities which have a We can see then that the causes of alcoholism are indeed tolerant attitude towards heavy drinking have a high incidence multifactorial. Genetic underpinnings, hereditary factors, of alcoholism. All of us are influenced much more than we about 25% of all alcoholics have an alcoholic parent. “The appreciate by the values and beliefs of the society to which importance of hereditary features in alcoholism, a fact long we belong. We are first exposed to these in the family circle, suspected but now established beyond reasonable doubt, and subsequently have them reinforced through education or thanks mainly to studies in the United States and Scandinavia participation in vocational and social life. For example, if one is carried out on twins, and on adoptees separated from their a member of a sporting circle where the custom is to celebrate parents at an early age, as well as by animal experiments” victory or defeat with large quantities of alcohol, then one is (Cooney, 1991, p140). Any child growing up in an alcoholic more likely to conform to this practice. family is inevitably exposed to considerable disharmony because of parental alcoholism. This leads to upset and

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Biological Factors: a true disease (Jellinek, 1960, p49). Scientists have pointed to biological and biochemical factors Gamma alcoholism in which there is a loss of control after in more recent considerations over the past twenty years. taking a small amount of alcohol. Almost all members of AA Von Wartburg in Switzerland suggests that, in alcoholics the are thought to be gamma alcoholics according to Jellinek. enzyme alcohol dehydrogenase is abnormal in being much He considered that gamma alcoholics are both symptomatic more active than that found in normal individuals. Almost and physically dependent. “They suffer emotional and invariably nutritional deficiencies have been found in alcoholics psychological impairment, their social and economic examined. Neurochemical research in the U.S. in recent years functioning is compromised, and they develop a tolerance has turned to look at brain waves (p3 brain waves showed to alcohol and experience withdrawal symptoms if they stop a more dampened response) in alcoholics. Certain recent drinking. Clearly, they are sick people and Jellinek did consider studies in the US suggest that there may be some truth in gamma alcoholism to be a true disease” (Levin, 1995, p 99). the theory of inborn biological defect. Many alcoholics cannot It was from his study on the drinking history of members of AA deal with or metabolise alcohol effectively. In essence, they that Jellinek developed and described the category of gamma suffer from what is called an inborn error or some physical alcoholism as a chronic progressive disease. defect of metabolism. “We are now aware, thanks to certain Delta alcoholism is characterised by physical dependence animal studies carried out in the United States that there may with few or no symptoms. Jellinek believes that alcoholism be some truth in this theory after all (Cooney, 1991, p 13). in heavy wine drinking countries such as France is largely delta alcoholism. The delta drinker does not lose control; he 1.3 Psychodynamic Theoretical Understandings: Jellinek or she does not get drunk, violent, or pass out, but he or and the Disease Concept of Alcoholism: she cannot stop drinking and are unable to abstain without Emil Jellinek’s The Disease Concept of Alcoholism (1960) was experiencing withdrawal symptoms. High rates of liver disease a groundbreaking research study which made the disease are associated with delta alcoholism (Jellinek, 1960, p49). concept of alcoholism scientifically respectable. Jellinek Jellinek’s final category is epsilon alcoholism in which the considered alcoholism as a progressive disease culminating individual drinks to excess but only periodically. This category in a loss of control, that is, the inability to stop drinking after is really called “binge drinking” and the epsilon drinker goes having begun. Jellinek derived this view largely from responses on binges, often for no apparent reason and of undetermined to a questionnaire on drinking histories that he submitted to a length lasting for days until he collapses. He will not drink at sample of AA members. Few pieces of research have had all until the next binge which could be weeks, months or years such influence. Every alcoholic rehabilitation programme will later. Jellinek’s categories are a useful guide. However, many normally have a chart of Jellinek’s stages of progression, alpha, beta, and epsilon drinkers become gamma alcoholics. which it uses to teach the disease concept of alcoholism to Temporary abstinence must be the treatment goal and for the patients. According to this scheme, alcoholism progresses from gamma alcoholic, permanent abstinence is the final treatment “occasional relief drinking” to “obsessive drinking continuing in goal. vicious cycles”, having passed through such stages as “onset of blackouts”, “grandiose and aggressive behaviour”, “family Otto Fenichel: and friends avoided”, and “ indefinable fears”. The order of Otto Fenichel, whose book The Psychoanalytic Theory of progression is seen as invariant and the notion of alcoholism Neurosis (1945) is almost canonical, considered that oral as a progressive, fatal disease is canonical to AA. dependence and frustration result in chronic depression in Jellinek ‘s second major contribution is his taxonomic system the alcoholic. Fenichel highlighted the severity of alcoholic or classification of different types of alcoholics. Alpha psychopathology and spoke of depression with rage turned alcoholism in which the individual drinks as a relief from mental against the self. He saw alcoholism as a maladaptive defence pain, depression is characterized by the presence of such mechanism used to resolve neurotic conflicts, especially symptoms as hangovers or blackouts and by psychological, conflict between dependence and the expression of anger. It not physical dependence. The alpha alcoholic is the person is to Fenichel that we owe “the observation that the superego who needs alcohol on regular basis and who becomes anxious has been defined as that part of the mind which is soluble if it is not available ( Levin, 1995, p99). “Alpha alcoholism is in alcohol, making it possible for the drinker to use alcohol not necessarily progressive. In fact, in Jellinek’s formulation to indulge in forbidden impulses and resolve id-superego it is not, and indeed some drinkers remain psychologically conflicts” (Levin, 1995,p167). Fenichel was the first to refer dependent on alcohol for life without deteriorating physically explicitly to narcissistic regression in alcoholism. He highlighted or mentally; nor do they become physically dependent” (Levin, the deepening self-involvement that accompanies alcoholic 1995,p99). Jellinek did not consider alpha alcoholism to be a regression (Levin, 1995, p167). Narcissism means love of true disease. oneself. It has both healthy and pathological forms. Healthy Beta alcoholism in which the individual drinks due to self-esteem involves self-love, while morbid preoccupation demands of the position: politicians, journalists, marketing and with self is pathological. “Most observers agree that alcohol advertising personnel, veterinary surgeons, clergy, all are high addiction leads to narcissistic regression, returning to an in the statistics of admission to psychiatric alcoholic centres. immature and pathological form of narcissism characterized “The typical beta alcoholic is a heavy drinker, usually of beer, by self-absorption and self-centredness” (Levin, 1995, p153). who continues to function socially and economically in a fairly adequate way as he or she continues to inflict somatic injury Karl Menninger: on him or herself” (Levin, 1995, p99). Although beta alcoholism Karl Minninger was an American psychiatrist who subscribed is not a progressive disease, it too is a form of pathological to Freud’s theory of a death instinct (thanatos) and who put drinking. Again, Jellinek did not consider beta alcoholism to be more emphasis on the self-destructiveness of alcoholism than did other theorists. He referred to alcoholism as a form 26 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER of chronic suicide. He sees it as a destructive aggression However, when solitary drinking means deliberately preferring against the self. There is no question but that alcoholics to take a drink by oneself, it is an entirely different matter. This engage in self-destructive behaviour. Their addiction costs is a time when the alcoholic can hatch some great business them dearly in terms of health, career success, relationships deals, secure a large rise in their pay packet, become a great and emotional tranquillity. Menninger in that wonderful book, poet, surgeon, lover etc. And all of this is done through drink Man Against Himself (1938) suggests that alcoholics are thus escaping reality into a world of fantasy in a Walter Mitty almost invariably jolly, sociable, talkative, who seem obliged –like existence. to make themselves well liked and are very skilful at doing so. He considers: “It takes very little penetration to discover, however, that this inordinate wish to be loved which compels them to be at such pains to be charming and to win popularity 1.5 Carl Jung’s Contribution to the Psychology of in one circle or another bespeaks a great underlying feeling Recovery: Alcoholism and Spirituality of insecurity, a feeling which must constantly be denied, In the early 1930’s Carl Jung worked with Harry Rowland and compensated for, or anesthetized” (Menninger, 1938, p148). Bob Wilson who were both cured of their addiction by Jung Menninger furthers suggests that such feelings of insecurity having gone for treatment to some of the most distinguished and inferiority depend less upon actual reality comparisons psychiatrists in the United States. Rowland was a successful than upon unconscious, irrational reasons-generally feelings businessman who had come to Jung for help with his alcoholism of great frustration and rage, and the fear and guilt which the rage induces (Menninger, 1938, p 148). He hold the view that as we change from directing our existence according to the the soul’s thirst for a “union with God” pleasure principle to a programme of directing our existence according to a reality principle, the alcoholic suffers more in terms of disappointment and an inability to cope with the and left Zurich certain that he had been cured. However, he transition to greater independence in life. “It was so great that returned to Jung drunk and in despair. Jung told him that there it definitely affected his personality development so that in was no hope and that only a major personality reorganisation certain respects he remains all his life what we call an “oral driven by a powerful emotion, “in essence a conversion character” (Menninger, 1938, p149). experience could save him” ( Levin, 1995, p168). Roland left in deep despair but Jung’s words touched something deep 1.4 Symptoms of Alcoholism- Major Concerns and inside him and he did what AA would call “hitting bottom”. In Initial Warnings: his despair he reached out for help and did indeed have a A deteriorating drinking pattern evolves over time. The most conversion experience, joining the Oxford Movement, which reliable information suggests that approximately 8-9% of all was a revival movement popular in the 1920’s and 1930’s. He those who consume alcohol develop the condition we term became and remained sober. The Oxford Movement had a alcoholism. Over time, there is an increasing tolerance to set of spiritual steps that their members followed. These steps alcohol and the first significant sign is that the alcoholic avoids became the basis of the famous Twelve Steps of Alcoholics the company of slow drinkers. There is an urgency of first Anonymous. Roland spread the good news to his friend and drinks with an inclination to gulp first drinks. Here the individual fellow drunk, Ebby Thacker, who also became sober. Ebby is attempting to raise the level of his blood alcohol as quickly in turn went to visit his friend, Bill Wilson, the other founder as possible so that he can obtain the desired ‘buzz’ or ‘glow’ of AA, who had a major problem with alcoholism. Jung from the increased alcohol content. Grandiose and aggressive believed that only a spiritual and mystical experience could behaviour are other features that become manifest and have bring about healing and a return to full mental wellness. Jung been noted in the research literature. Memory blackouts or motivated both men to become the subject of a spiritual or alcohol amnesia in two out of ten drinking bouts are other religious experience necessary for recovery from disease in definable features. This is a loss of memory brought about life. Jung wrote in his correspondence with the founders of by drink and not a “passing out” or “fainting” as is sometimes AA that alcohol is also called “spirits” and believed that the wrongly believed. A black out is always of significance when alcoholic’s thirst for alcohol is equivalent to the soul’s thirst for “somebody other than the drinker is writing his history”. Finally, a “union with God”. He wrote: “Alcohol in Latin is spiritus, and other noticeable aspects of this extraordinary illness might you use the same word for the highest religious experience include impaired thinking, ‘decreased control’, indefinable fears, as well as the most depraving poison. The helpful formula tremors and early morning shakes, unreasonable resentments, therefore is “spiritus contra spiritus” ( Levin, 1995, p168).The aggression, family and friends avoided, moral deterioration notion of spiritual renewal in recovery is a core ingredient in in cases of advanced alcoholism. Extravagance with money Jungian psychology and in the Twelve- Steps Programme. goes hand in glove with loss of control. Heavy drinkers will The Twelve Steps is a distinctly spiritual journey that the spend well in excess of their income and are inclined to ‘buy recovering alcoholic embarks upon. C.G. Jung would hold the the party’ by paying for more than their fair share, particularly view that psychological healing and the discovery of God are if in the company of people whom they consider to be more interconnected and the individual who is not anchored in the affluent or socially important than themselves. “One theory to notion of a God or Higher Power can offer no resistance on account for this behaviour is that the alcoholic is attempting to his own resources to the physical and moral blandishments of expiate his guilt by subconsciously punishing himself through the world. overspending” (Cooney, 1991, p21). Finally, the notion of the solitary drinker is another consideration. Every day thousands of social drinkers do so and this signifies nothing sinister.

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1.6 Adult Children of Alcoholics-Healing the Child p49). However, in an alcoholic or dysfunctional family, the Within: Jung’s and Adler’s Contribution to the system is geared to support just one person, generally the Psychology of ACOA’s dependent. The first principle of systems is that of wholeness. The concept of the child within has been a part of Western The whole is greater than the sum of its parts. This means cultures for several hundred years. C.G. Jung reminds us: “ that the elements added together do not produce the system- We talk about the child, but we should mean the child in the the system results from the interaction of the elements. Family adult, for in every adult there lurks a child- an eternal child, a systems psychology shows us just how each person in a divine child, a true self, something that is always becoming, family plays a part in the whole system and Alfred Adler with is never completed, which calls for unceasing care, attention, his psychology of birth order and family constellation taught us and education. That is the part of the human personality which how to understand why children in the same family often seem wants to develop and become whole” (Jung, 1966p 49). so different. In many ways the family is a microcosm of society. Denial of the child within, and the subsequent emergence of a For Adler, birth order could have an impact on how the child co-dependent self are particularly common among children of relates to society and the development of a style of life. Adler adults who grew up in troubled families. In the alcoholic home, observed that many people wonder why children in the same there is a child within who continues to need nurturing. The family often differ so widely. Adler’s birth order psychology following terms are used interchangeably: Real Self, True Self, is highly significant and the interpretation of one’s position in Child Within, Inner Child, Divine Child and Higher Self. It has the family has a great deal to do with how adults interact in also been called our Deepest Self, our Inner Core (Whitfield, the world. From Adler’s work and the subsequent research 1987, p9). of Harry Stein, we have acquired a better understanding of Research on the impact of parental alcoholism on children seeing the family as a system. This helps us to understand dates back to 1945. However, it was much later in the 1960’s how one member’s alcoholism can affect every other member when a significant body of research focused primarily on the of the family even though its effects may be felt differently by genetics and thus the transmission of alcoholism as related to each individual in that family. As a family disease, alcoholism psychopathology in the children. This work still took the individual is both personal and systemic. It affects each family member focus and ignored or missed a recognition of the interactional, as an individual and the family system as a whole. systemic impact of living with alcoholism. In 1962, Ruth Fox Family systems can be either closed or open. A healthy family and the Al Anon movement made a revolutionary claim: “Every is an open system- a group of people who are open to new member in such a family is affected by it-emotionally, spiritually ideas, experiences, perspectives and who adapt to change and in most cases economically, socially, and often physically” and growth. Ann Wilson Schaef notes that “the dysfunctional (Brown, 1995, p180). Family members began to be included in family system and the chemically dependent family system treatment with the hope they would help the alcoholic maintain are closed and operate by a set of rules that inhibit growth abstinence. “Their inclusion reinforced the unhealthy dynamics and are destructive to those in the system” (Schaef, 1986, of the drinking system by holding the alcoholic in the central p49). Roles in the dysfunctional family system can be rigid position, with others reactive to and even responsible for that and inflexible. They tend to serve the family’s needs rather person’s sobriety”(Brown, 1995, p281). Margaret Cork’s book than the child’s. Children are powerless over the drinking by The Forgotten Child is viewed as the starting point of what the alcoholic parent so the ability of the child to survive the became a national social movement in the 1980’s and a major alcoholic family becomes dependent on the child’s ability area of research and treatment. Children of alcoholics were to adjust and adapt to the situation. All roles are played by identified as a separate, legitimate population, suffering the someone and everyone plays a role to serve the same end: to consequences of living with parental alcoholism. The National maintain family equilibrium (Friel and Friel, 1988, p55).In the Association for Children of Alcoholics (NACOA) and The family systems of alcoholics, children will adopt different roles Children of Alcoholics Foundation were also established to for survival purposes and to cope with the dysfunctional nature promote research on the impact of parental alcoholism on of the home environment in the following ways: children. Both groups have raised new questions in regard to alcoholism as a family disease. The Family Hero: This particular role is often occupied by the eldest child, the The family may be described as a “system of interdependent super kid , the high achiever, or as the literature sometimes relationships, engaged in change and adaptation and geared refers to as “goody two shoes”. He/she always does what to the growth and support of each member” ( Woititz, 1983, is right, often to a dazzling degree. He/she is responsible, placatory, and according to Charles Deutch: “ they are often regarded with respect and even awe because they have apparently wrestled strength, responsibility and self-esteem from the jaws of adversity” (Deutch, 1982, p49). They become workaholics. They derive self-esteem from achievement, but often set themselves up for failure by taking on impossible tasks. Hero adults are classic “Type A” individuals. There is an alarming rate of acute depression and suicide among them. As adults who don’t know how to relax or to vent their feelings, they may easily turn to alcohol or tranquillers. “The Hero provides self-esteem for the family. He goes to law school and becomes an internationally –known attorney, but secretly feels awful because he has a brother who has died of alcoholism.

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But he carries the family banner for all the public to see. He tend to be unaware that their parent or other family member is makes the family proud; but at a terrible price in terms of his alcoholic or dependent on another drug. Whitfield is of the view own –being” (Friel and Friel, 1988, p55). that close to half of adult children of alcoholics deny a parental drinking problem and up to 90% of ACOA’s who themselves The Scapegoat/Acting Out: become alcoholic or chemically dependent cannot identify a The scapegoat or problem child is the role that the second parental drinking problem. Whitfield (1989, p 26) suggests that or another child in the family is forced to assume. He/she is “this lack of awareness of the major source of the family chaos the reverse image of the Hero’s. Her function is to act out the results in extensive, destructive and unnecessary acceptance, family pain and allow the world to think that it is not the family as well as self-blame and guilt among family members”. There that is sick but this particular child. The scapegoat appears is a fifth role referred to as Dad’s Little Princess/Mom’s Little to be consumed by anger but the characteristic feeling is Man and it authenticates Whitfield’s suggestion in relation to hurt. Underneath their tough-kid exteriors, the scapegoat this lack of awareness of the family chaos. This fifth role is is hurt, lonely and often feels abandoned. Scapegoats are sometimes called “emotional or covert incest”. Friel and Friel usually the most visible children of alcoholic families, the (1988, p56) suggest that “this role feels good to a child, who known troublemakers, acting- out is the assumed stereotype. gets to be a “little spouse” to one of the parents in the system. Scapegoat girls may run away, fail in school, become This child does not get to be a child, though, and is actually promiscuous, steal or use drugs. Research has shown that seduced into the role by a parent who is too afraid and too pregnancy is a big risk among girls hoping to find the intimacy dysfunctional to get his needs met by another adult. Those of and love that they could never find at home. “ The Scapegoat us who were given this role usually wind up getting physically gets to act out all of the family’s dysfunction and therefore or emotionally abused by others in our adult relationships, takes the blame and the “heat” for the family” (Friel and Friel, because our boundaries were not respected when we were 1988, p56). little”.

The Lost Child/ The Adjuster/The Quiet One: 1.7 Alcoholism and the Counselling Process: The third role is known as the lost child who fades into the Spirituality is considered a search for meaning and purpose family woodwork, never giving anyone trouble. Pliable and in life. It is an innate human quality. All human beings are undemanding, they are sometimes referred to as “the angel”. spiritual beings, although some people may be more The lost child manages to stay out of the storm in the process; spiritually developed than others. Spirituality is an essential they establish little or no self-identity. Wegscheider-Cruse component of humanness, integrated with our physical, social (1985, p82) considers: “They have no real sense of who they and psychological dimensions. The writings of Alcoholics are or where they belong in the world. He /she can never know Anonymous (AA) have stated: “When, therefore, we speak to intimacy as they have never developed communication skills you of God, we mean your own conception of God” (Alcoholics or the ability to form close relationships.” Charles Deutsch sees Anonymous, 1976,p 47). A conscious attempt to connect with a this child’s role as follows: “The learned powerlessness of Lost Higher Power is essential for active spirituality and an essential Children/The Adjuster results from their experience of any form step in the journey of recovery for the alcoholic. Members of of participation in conflict as a losing proposition. They adjust AA believe that every person has a fundamental idea of a silently to every demand and every situation. Loneliness is the Higher Power. It is not sufficient to only believe, people must characteristic feeling of the Lost Child” (Deutch, 1982,p59). take action in the form of prayer or meditation and mindfulness. The Lost Child deals with the family dysfunction by means of escape. “ If we take people as they are we make them worse. The Mascot/Expert Manipulator/Family Clown: If we treat them as if they were what The mascot or family clown is the fourth role. The mascot they ought to be, we help them become is similar to the placating child, although much more of a what they are capable of becoming” clown. He /she is tense, anxious and often overactive. They Goethe. remain an emotional cripple, fragile and immature. Fear is the characteristic emotion of the Mascot; they are the expert manipulator. “Often one of the younger children, the Mascot Transcendence of oneself refers to a movement away from provides the humour and comic relief for the family. He or she self as a manipulator of others for selfish non-spiritual gain. gives the family a sense of fun or playfulness, of silliness and a People become more spiritual as they release their concept of distorted type of “joy” (Friel and Friel, 1988, p54). Relationships wants and desires as needs. There is an emphasis on self as tend to be shallow and short lived, impulsive and irresponsible. important only in an unselfish, altruistic manner. Irvin Yalom’s The family plays an important role in development because it notion of altruistic living is worthy of note: “making the world a represents the societal training ground for the growing child. better place for others is surely a powerful source of meaning”. As a child interacts with the environment, a life plan is formed This spiritual tendency then moves the individual towards love, which guides the child in ways that are significant in the world. meaning, hope, positivity, transcendence, connectedness and We are social beings and social connectedness is one of the compassion, so that we do not ossify, lose our vitality, fall into most important elements in balanced growth and development. depression, and lose all sense of the beauty and the joy of The dysfunctional system will have a devastating impact on living. The opposite of being spiritual is to have no energy, this natural process. is to have lost all zest for living-depressed and so forth. Spirituality includes one’s capacity for creativity, growth, and We know that children of alcoholics and other family members the development of a values system. Spirituality encompasses

29 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER the religious, spiritual and transpersonal. Ronald Rolheiser be that equilibrium benign or malignant. Family therapy often considers that spirituality is more about whether or not we can makes family members aware of their co-dependency and of sleep at night than about whether or not we go to church, pray their denial of both that co-dependency and the alcoholic’s or meditate. It is far more basic than that. Rolheiser (1998, alcoholism. An outgrowth in some ways of family therapy, p6-7) considers: “ Spirituality is about being integrated or network therapy ignores the dysfunction and pathology in the falling apart, about being within community or being lonely, system and the “network” is used exclusively to assist the about being in harmony with mother earth or being alienated from her. Irrespective of whether or not we let ourselves be Healer (For John Cooney) consciously shaped by any explicit religious idea, we act The horror of accusing morning light in ways that leave us either healthy or unhealthy, loving Condemns me to another hideous day or bitter, in community or alienated from it. What shapes Did someone cry? What did I do last night? our actions is our spirituality”. The following orientations, Was someone hurt? Insulted? What did I say? Logotherapy, Jungian Analytical Psychology, Modern-Person My hands are crazy, blood streaks my eyes, Centred Therapy, all attest to the importance of psychological Jeering images flash havoc through my mind, healing and the discovery of a God as interconnected. For My mouth is full of muck and stupid lies, Carl Rogers, “God is love as the Epistle of John tells us”. I’m hell, I know hell’s taste and smell and sound. Viktor Frankl in his model of Logotherapy holds the view that Healer, I hear you speak: your head and heart God is very much a God of the inner human being, a God of Help many a suffering man and woman the heart. “You cannot really love God if you do not love men While I, like countless women and men, and you cannot love men if you do not love God”. Patrick Am learning how to tend and heal each hurt Kavanagh, the Monaghan poet, likewise reminds us: “Men With candid, gentle words, profoundly human. build their heavens as they build their circle of friends, God is Thanks to you, hope lives again. in the bits and pieces of everyday”. Brendan Kennelly.

Thus, in alcoholism counselling therapists use a variety of eclectic models embracing person-centred therapy, existential identified patient, the drinker, in achieving and maintaining therapy and logotherapy. There is a need often to use a sobriety (Levin, 1995, p244). This modality is most effectively Cognitive Behavioural Therapy Approach that is solid, logical used with patients who are motivated to stop drinking. In and directive to challenge denial, defensiveness and offer family therapy, the identified patient is seen as the repository support for movement into recovery. The work of Albert Ellis of all of the pathology in the system and family therapy seeks and his REBT orientation is an excellent and well-established to elucidate and make manifest the multifaceted ways in which successful model to confront and challenge the client in more the system and its members project their dysfunctionality onto difficult cases. The above models are used widely in alcoholism the patient. counselling; they all have a deeply spiritual impact as stated and all hold the view that spiritual transformation occurs within Conclusion: particular spheres of relation: Life with Self; Life with Nature; This study has shown that alcoholism is a progressive Life with Man; Life with God. Sr Concilio in Cuan Mhuire addiction with a high morbidity and mortality rate. It is also and in her constellation of Treatment Centres around Ireland, a family disease and the illness affects each and every employs a therapeutic model that is built around these four member of the family. Unlike many other health conditions, spheres of relation which is deeply spiritual and like the Twelve alcoholism embroils family members in its development and Steps Approach in AA and Al-Anon which add support, there “consequently, these members are deeply affected by its is this distinctly spiritual journey at the heart of all treatments. manifestations” as we noted in the study (Cooney, 1991, p110). Building up self-esteem, seeing the healing power in nature, Cooney states: “In the throes of the disease, the drinking itself realising the importance of people and social-connectedness, is often the only distinguishing symptom that separates the a belief in a Higher Power, are all essential ingredients in the alcoholic from his family This accounts for the often quoted healing process towards sobriety, mental health and wellness comment: For every alcoholic there are three or four dry ones” again. For Frankl, Jung and Rogers especially in the latter’s (Cooney , 1991, p110). The family members are caught up in last phase of development, counselling is seen as a spiritual this roller-coaster with many resulting personality defects as vocation and analysis is regarded as a deeply spiritual quest. the study indicated. When Carl Rogers spoke in 1986 of “inner spirit touching inner spirit” and of a therapeutic relationship transcending itself and Why is it called a family illness? This label is due mainly to becoming part of something larger, he was discovering the the severe emotional effects caused by the addiction but “mystical” or “spiritual dimension” late in life since he was also because alcoholism tends to run in families (Cooney, deeply ambivalent towards organised religion. 1991, p110). “So people with strong family histories of Group Therapy, Family Therapy and Network Therapy are other alcoholism, particularly in the first and second generations, popular modalities used in alcoholism treatment (Levin,1995, need to exercise that bit more care in the consumption of p 242-245). The curative power of group therapy cannot be alcohol”(Cooney, 1991, p110). There are both hereditary and overemphasised since alcoholics punish themselves for sins environmental factors involved in the addiction as the study real or imagined, including their alcoholism, by drinking more. has shown. Indeed, the field of alcoholism is full of paradox: The group must also be used to confront denial and to help for to gain victory you have to accept defeat and to regain members recognise, correctly label, appropriately express, pride you need humility. You need also to make amends to and deal with feelings. Family Systems Theory looks at the way the family and first make amends to yourself. Cooney is of the in which a family maintains its homeostasis, its equilibrium, view that the same is true for family members. He considers: “ 30 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER

Much time-wasting energy is spent trying to change someone Peace of mind is the eventual goal. Recovery for the whole family else, but all one can reasonably do is to work on changing is the ideal and this is what the counsellor and the psychiatrist oneself as well as creating circumstances or space for the attempt to bring about. If the alcoholic is unwilling or unable to other person to change. In my experience, recovery is often stop drinking, it may be necessary for the rest of the family to instigated by family members who discover this reality and detach themselves and make their own recovery. Full recovery make adjustments to their own situations” (Cooney, 1991, requires great will-power, hard work, time and patience. “ One p111). estimate postulates that it takes at least eighteen months, and possibly two years, for the family system to regain normality No two people are the same, no two alcoholics are the same, following treatment. Recovery is always ongoing” (Cooney, no two families are the same; so it is difficult to attempt to 1991, p122). The last words we leave with Professor Brendan describe definitely the unhappiness created by alcoholism Kennelly who speaks frequently about his own addiction, his in the home. One is reminded of Tolstoy’s famous dictum: alcoholism and subsequent reclamation with over thirty years “All happy families resemble each other, but each unhappy of sobriety achieved recently as he intimated to this writer-a family is unhappy in its own way”. The range and scale of living inspiration to others and someone who lives the truth of difficulties experienced by families of alcoholics are vast- debt, Irvin Yalom: “ The belief that it is good to give, to be useful to gross neglect, physical and sexual violence, broken promises, others, to make the world a better place for others, is surely a inappropriate conversations and so forth. Sometimes, alcoholics powerful source of meaning”. disclose to their children information that they should not hear at far too early an age. Much work has gone into describing the development of alcoholism from a family perspective. Family Begin (By Brendan Kennelly) members in the early stages are usually met by defensiveness. wThough we live in a world that dreams of ending Shame and guilt are the order of the day, so that the family that always seems about to give in becomes more and more isolated socially as it tries to solve its something that will not acknowledge conclusion own problems and avoid social contacts to conceal the truth insists that we forever begin. (Cooney, 1991, p113). Behavioural patterns are inconsistent and with ‘dry spells’ occurring intermittently, this Jekyll and Bibliography: Hyde behaviour is very difficult to cope with particularly so for Ackerman, Robert (2002) Perfect Daughters: Adult Daughters of Alcoholics, HCI younger children who crave consistency. Sometimes members Florida. Ackerman, Robert (1986) Children of Alcoholics: Growing in the Shadow, HCI of the family become enablers or co-alcoholics as the study has Florida. delineated. The enabler is anyone who unwittingly supports or Ackerman, Robert (1987) Let Go and Grow: Recovery for Adult Children, HCI Florida. encourages the alcoholic’s drinking. Enablers succeed only in Ackerman, Robert (1997) Same House Different Homes: Why Adult Children of taking responsibility away from the alcoholic and in placing an Alcoholics Are Not All the Same, HCI Florida. Brown, Stephanie (1995) Treating Alcoholism. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass. excessive burden on their own shoulders. Cooney, John (2005) Under the Weather, Dublin: Gill and MacMillan. Cork, Margaret (1969) The Forgotten Children. Toronto: ADARF. Curtis, Paul (1987) Resistence and Recovery of Adult Children of Alcoholics. This study has had a focus on the importance of spirituality Deutch, Charles (1982) Broken Bottles, Broken Dreams: Understanding and in recovery from alcoholism particularly in regard to the work Helping the Children of Alcoholics. New York : Teachers College Press. Friel, John and Friel, Linda (1998) Adult Children: The Secrets of Dysfunctional of AA, Al-Anon and some of the counselling models that were Families. Florida: HCI Publishers. considered effective. The Twelve-Steps Approach is highly Jellinek, E.M. (1960) The Disease Concept of Alcoholism. New Haven: College and University Press. spiritual: “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves Levin, Jerome David (1998) Introduction to Alcoholism Counselling. PA: Taylor and could restore us to sanity/ Made a decision to turn our will Francis. McCabe, Ian 2016) Carl Gustav Jung and Alcoholics Anonymous. London: Karnac and our lives over to the care of God as we understand Him./ Books. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being Menninger, Karl (1938) Man Against Himself. New York: Harcourt, Brace and Company. the exact nature of our wrongs./ Sought through prayer and Nakken, Craig(1996) The Addictive Personality. Minnesota: Hazelden Publishers. meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we Peele, Stanton (1988) Visions of Addiction. New York: Lexington Books. Rolheiser, Ronald understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us Schaef, A.W. (1986) Co-Dependence: Misdiagnosed and Mistreated. Minneapolis: and the power to carry that out”. This spiritual awakening is Harper/Winston. Thombs, Denis (1999) Introduction to Addictive Behaviours. New York: The Guildford difficult and precarious since active addicts obviously have Press. not learned from the history of their behaviour, because they Twerski, Abraham (1997) Addictive Thinking: Understanding Self-Deception. Minnesota: Hazelden Press. repeat actions that have been proven to be destructive. Their Wegscheider-Cruse, S. (1985) Choice-Making: For Co-Dependents, Adult Children purpose in life is to get high, so addicts seek no other purpose. and Spirituality Seekers. Florida: HCI. Whitfield, Charles (1989) Healing the Child Within. Florida : HCI. They can hardly consider self-improvement and a spiritual Woititz, Janet (1983) Adult Children of Alcoholics. Florida: HCI. awakening when their behaviour is frankly self-destructive. Biographical Note: Active addicts cannot delay gratifications and do not consider Professor M.L. O’Rourke is a lecturer in Trinity College Dublin, The Military College, the consequences of their actions. Addicts thus lack freedom, The Curragh, and the Institute of Integrative Counselling and Psychotherapy (IICP). He is Visiting Professor to the University of Indiana, Visiting Pr ofessor and External being ruthlessly dominated by the compulsion of the addiction. Examiner, University of Strathclyde, Glasgow, and ICPS Institute of Psychotherapy, Addiction is really the antithesis of spirituality. Twerski (1997, Athens. His most recent published work includes the following: Spirituality and Psychotherapy-Do We Have the Skills and Knowledge to hold this Sacred Space? p116) reminds us that “addictive thinking is nonspiritual, Grief, Bereavement and Loss; Specific Kinds of Loss: Children and Teenagers; The since its goal is the polar opposite of spirituality. This is why Psychology and Aetiology of Suicide; Social Media Addiction and the Loss of Self: Time to Detox ; Carl Gustav Jung: Father of a Spiritual and Pluralistic Psychology. recovery from addiction requires a shift from addictive thinking Dr O’Rourke was Course Director of the M.Ed and M.Sc Degrees in Educational to spirituality, although not necessarily to religion. Certainly, Guidance Counselling, School of Education, Trinity College Dublin, from 1992-2012. religion embraces spirituality and may be an additional source (This article is dedicated with love and affirmation to all those wonderful friends and of strength in recovery, but it is not absolutely essential for students, who transformed their lives from the muck and turmoil of addiction to sobriety in reaching the high plateau of human existence again and who later became living recovery”. inspirations to others. In the words of Oscar Romero, “there are many things that can only be seen through eyes that have cried” and we know that times of despair are often 31 essential in the discovery of hidden capacities and assets. Carl Jung remarked once that without necessity nothing budges, the human personality least of all). THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER

How secondhand drinking ruins lives: ‘Every family has been touched by this’ Paula Cocozza

Helen Witty thought she had taught her children all about the overwhelming …” She trails off. She drank on average a bottle of dangers of drinking. She was raised with the knowledge that her wine a week, with “the odd binge”. great-grandfather’s alcoholism had led him to suicide. “It’s in the family,” her mother warned her. In a classic expression of the Sam’s son is now 12, but at the time he was conceived the UK ripple effect of harmful drinking, Witty kept her own consumption government did not advocate abstinence during pregnancy. modest. And she taught her two children to understand and to be (Today, 41% of women in the UK are thought to consume alcohol careful of the long shadow cast by other people’s drinking. while pregnant.) Sam believed her pregnancy was proceeding well. Every scan showed that her son was growing as he should But what none of the family had prepared for was the day when be. The possibility of FASD “kind of flittered and then escaped Helen Marie, Witty’s 16-year-old daughter, stood in the drive of my mind”. their Florida home wearing her skates; she wanted to destress before a big school play. She flipped around, blew her mother a Sam’s son was nine and had repeatedly been excluded from kiss and said she would be right back. mainstream school when he was finally diagnosed with partial FAS (foetal alcohol syndrome). “When the paediatrician confirmed my She didn’t return. When her father went to look for her, he found fears, I broke down and cried,” Sam says. “You have to come to a crime scene. Helen Marie had been hit while skating on a bike terms with the fact that you harmed your child. You gave your path by a 17-year-old driver who had been drinking tequila and child brain damage. There is a massive part of you that just wants smoking cannabis. Instead of bringing his daughter home, her to block it out. But you can’t. You have to live it, day in, day out.” father had to identify her body. Sam’s long list of her son’s symptoms, which include sleep issues, Helen Marie was killed by another person’s abuse of alcohol manic behaviours, depression and low social maturity, is balanced in a tragic example of so-called secondhand drinking. While by an equally long list of what she appreciatively calls his “highest the concept of secondhand, or passive, smoking is familiar, qualities”: his creativity, his IT skills, his loyalty to friends and secondhand drinking is a growing field of study. Last week, “massive heart”. She is clearly a loving, attentive mother who is the Alcohol Research Group at the Public Health Institute in highly attuned to her son’s needs. At some point, when her little Emeryville, California, published research showing that 53 million boy has sufficient emotional maturity and stability, she will need to Americans each year experience harm from another individual’s muster all of those qualities to explain to him his diagnosis. alcohol use. That is one in four men, and one in five women. Given that passive smoking is treated as a serious public health It is the ultimate discharge of maternal responsibility, but Sam hazard in countries from Mongolia to Colombia, Australia to the worries that the disclosure may take her away “as his one safe UK, why are governments so slow to notice, let alone challenge, person. This is what secondary alcohol use has created in my secondhand drinking? family,” she says. Even when a person harmed by secondary drinking acts to intercept the repercussions, the psychological “Secondhand smoking really changed public opinion and paved impact can be inescapable. In 2014, Jabz Musinga’s father died the way for legislation to make bars and public places smoke- after falling into the River Aire in Leeds. It took several weeks for free,” says Sir Ian Gilmore, the chair of the Alcohol Health Alliance his body to surface, but Jabz, 25, knew what had happened as and the director of the Liverpool Centre for Alcohol Research. soon as she saw the security video of her dad walking drunkenly “There is undoubtedly harm from secondhand smoke, but the beside the water. range and magnitude of harms is likely to be even greater from alcohol.” The certainty must have felt strange, because she had spent her childhood “on tenterhooks”. What she had witnessed in her own “We are only just starting to appreciate the long-term impact of home, her father’s behaviour, “carried into my adult life, trickled these harms,” adds Katherine Karriker-Jaffe, a senior scientist into my dating life”, she says. “I had low standards of what to at the Alcohol Research Group in the US, and the author of the expect from a guy, and even from friends. People easily took research published last week. Her team worked with 10 categories advantage of me.” of harm, from harassment to assault. Although she cannot recall experiencing any secondhand harm herself, she is something of She soon found herself in an abusive relationship. “It was very an anomaly because, as Gilmore points out: “There is hardly a brief. I put my foot down straightaway. It was like two weeks and I family that hasn’t been touched in some way, whether it’s a child of an alcoholic or someone who has been punched on a night out. There are so many examples; it is genuinely unusual to come across a family where someone hasn’t been affected by alcohol.”

Often, the effects of alcohol use can ripple from one life into another. All too easily, a person who suffers a secondary harm can become a perpetrator of further harms.Sam is the birth mother of a child with foetal alcohol spectrum disorder (FASD). When she was pregnant, her then partner had a problem with alcohol. “It was an abusive relationship,” she says. “I struggled with what was going on. When you’re in that part of your life where everything is

32 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER said: ‘This is not going to work.’” She was thankful, she says, that alcohol in an array of social situations, from family celebrations to she was “able to stop” – which suggests that she may also have weekend binges, means that its abuse remains highly stigmatised: been able to continue. It took a particular conviction to intercede. a harmless pursuit that has simply exceeded control.

“It was very hard to say: ‘I’ve been affected by someone else’s “People say that if you smoke you harm others, but with alcohol drinking,’” Jabz says. “The focus tends to be on people who have you only harm yourself,” says Amy, 30. She vehemently disagrees. addictions,” not those around them. But she has no doubt that Her sister began to drink in her early 20s – just “having a wild alcohol changed her. “It shaped my personality. I would be a weekend”, as medical staff initially described it to the family. Within completely different person if it hadn’t happened. I do think about seven years, she died of heart failure. “Anyone else who had a it, once in a while – the person I would have been,” she says, terminal illness would have an abundance of understanding from as if a ghost self-shadows her. “I think I would have been more friends, colleagues. But you don’t have that support,” Amy says. confident. Maybe a better person.” “In fact, you don’t have the ability to talk about it without stigma.”

Jabz sounds adjusted and happy in her life, but that last note of Amy, who is from south Wales and volunteers for the charity Alcohol self-rebuke recalls the words of the MP Liam Byrne, another child Change UK, was training for a new job while her sister’s condition of an alcoholic father and a patron for the National Association for deteriorated. “I’d be in the hospital, then come straight to work Children of Alcoholics (NACOA), a charity that Jabz volunteers as if nothing had happened. I work in a fairly professional for. “You don’t know what’s normal, so you construct these perfect environment, and I know it sounds silly, but I wouldn’t want it templates of what you think good looks like,” he says. [her sister’s alcoholism] to impact on people’s view of me as a professional,” she says. Self-medicating with perfectionism, Byrne wrote “long lists of attributes” to live up to – “a blueprint for being a superhuman with She is not alone. The day after we speak, Karriker-Jaffe emails super powers”. He is 48 now. How old was he when he wrote his to say that she would like to alter her answer about her own last list? He sighs heavily. “Forty-three? Forty-four?” experience of secondhand drinking. “I watched an extended Secondhand drinking covers such a spectrum of human experience family member struggle with an alcohol use disorder that I believe that a wide range of measures is required to confront it. Byrne, eventually contributed to her death,” she says. “I think about her whose experiences have helped him to connect with the homeless often in relation to this work.” Karriker-Jaffe adds that she is unsure population of the West Midlands, where he is campaigning to be why she did not mention this on the phone. “Stigma, I suppose.” mayor, points out that about 2.5 million children in the UK have an Her revelation, as an expert in this field, suggests that alcohol alcoholic parent, and 50% of these “go on to develop problems abuse, and the harms of secondhand drinking, need to be themselves”. Greater education of frontline workers with children, destigmatised in order for its scale to be properly confronted. In including teachers and GPs, would help – something that the the UK, it is widely seen as deplorable to smoke in the company all-party parliamentary group Children of Alcoholics, which he of children – but even the most conscientious parents display few founded, is working to change. qualms about drinking. Does it matter, for instance, if children see

Witty, who is now the president of the charity Mothers Against Drunk Driving, would like stiffer laws against underage drinking. Sam would like more support for children with FASD – and their WE NEED TO REFRAME WHAT mothers. At present, nearly 80% of the NHS’s clinical commissioning WE BELIEVE IS PROBLEM DRINKING groups do not provide diagnosis for children with FASD, according to a freedom of information request by the National Organisation for Foetal Alcohol Syndrome-UK. Karriker-Jaffe is interested in the degree to which “negative impacts for people with heavy drinkers a parent habitually reach for a glass of wine to de-stress? Byrne in their lives appear to be stronger for women than men”. But laughs drily. “It does, yeah. Because you need to be able to model why can’t all the harms of secondhand drinking be addressed self-care.” with the same sort of legislative determination that denormalised “We need to reframe what we believe is problem drinking,” secondhand smoking? agrees Josh Connolly, a life, leadership and performance coach who has experienced secondhand drinking as the child of an “A single act, if I had a wish, would be to introduce a minimum unit alcoholic parent, and as an alcoholic parent himself. “I say: come price combined with increasing duty on alcohol,” says Gilmore, away from quantity and how often you are doing it. Because if your of the Alcohol Health Alliance. He cites the “duty escalator”, children know you get them to bed, get the wine out, have one introduced by the Labour government in 2008, pushing up duty glass of wine and relax, what they see is that they can’t help you on alcohol by 2% above inflation year on year. “That was the first relax: you go and get a glass of wine. It’s about the behaviours, time we saw outcomes like cirrhosis deaths plateau off and begin the feelings that alcohol use creates.” to fall. Unfortunately, George Osborne as chancellor removed that duty escalator. Twelve-step programmes, including that of Alcoholics Anonymous, helped Connolly eliminate alcohol from his life. But, in his sober “[With cigarettes] we have relentlessly pushed the price up.” years, he has found that his presence can make drinkers feel Gilmore points out. “Quietly, but relentlessly. And that’s made a uncomfortable in their relationship with alcohol – and this, he huge impact. The UK is the leading European country in reducing thinks, is where everyone who enjoys alcohol could benefit from smoking rates. The government has a real opportunity to show it some self-appraisal. is at the forefront of reducing alcohol-related harm, including harm to others. It needs to stop leaving alcohol to the free market like “The strange thing, as somebody who is seven and a half years soap powder and treat it as a potentially serious health risk, as it sober, is that I now face more stigma from society for not drinking has done with tobacco.” than I did as a dad who drank,” he says. No doubt this reluctance to examine our relationship with alcohol helps to make secondhand There are differences between smoking and drinking, of course. drinking so hard to acknowledge. As he says: “Society doesn’t More than 90% of the 181 governments to have signed up to have a line to cross on this. So how is an individual going to have the World Health Organization’s Framework Convention on one?” Tobacco Control (WHOFCTC) have implemented some form of smoking ban; Article 8, which relates to secondhand smoking, is Maybe it is time to explore not only the ways in which we have, as the most implemented of all WHOFCTC articles. But with alcohol, individuals, experienced a secondhand harm from alcohol – but the desired outcomes – the appropriate limits – are more variable, also those in which we may have perpetrated one. more open to discussion. And no doubt the normalisation of From The Guardian July 2019 33 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER

tudublin.ie WE’RE TOLD THAT TOO MUCH TU DUBLIN - SCREEN TIME HURTS OUR KIDS. A NEW UNIVERSITY WHERE’S THE EVIDENCE? Andrew Przybylski and Amy Orben FOR A CHANGING OPEN IRELAND DAYS TU Dublin is Ireland’s first Technological University: a university where the arts, sciences, business, engineering and technology converge, and where students BLANCHARDSTOWN of all levels from Apprenticeship through to PhD learn in a practice-based environment. Tuesday 12 November With close linksTU to industry andDublin community in 10:00 - 12:30 Ireland, and our academic partners around the world, our students and graduates have many opportunities to put theory into practice and to build fulfilling careers. TALLAGHT

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Each year, teens and preteens rated their social media use and WE’RE TOLD THAT TOO MUCH told us how satisfied they were with aspects of their life. We were SCREEN TIME HURTS OUR KIDS. interested in testing both whether changes in social media use over time actually preceded shifts in life satisfaction and whether WHERE’S THE EVIDENCE? such changes influenced subsequent social media use. In simple terms, are you more likely to “use” if you’re happy or sad? Andrew Przybylski and Amy Orben What did we find? Well, mostly nothing! In more than half of the thousands of statistical models we tested, we found nothing more If you had attended the Royal College of Psychiatrists’ international than random statistical noise. In the remainder, we did find some congress in London in July you could have been forgiven for small trends over time – these were mostly clustered in data coming away with the following thoughts. Addiction to Fortnite, provided by teenage girls. Decreases in satisfaction with school, the online game, is a real disorder; social media is depleting family, appearance and friends presaged increased social media “our neurotransmitter deposits”; and “excess screen time has use, and increases in social media use preceded decreases in reduced our attention span to eight seconds, one less than that satisfaction with school, family, and friends. You can see then of a goldfish”. how, if you were determined to extract a story, you could cook up one about teenage girls and unhappiness. Scary stuff! Only problem is, none of these claims is supported by facts or a drop of scientific evidence.Fears that the digital But – and this is key – it’s not an exaggeration to say that these world is harmful have proliferated for years. Narratives about effects were minuscule by the standards of science and trivial if you smartphones, social media or video games causing mental health want to inform personal parenting decisions. Our results indicated problems are especially popular. Rarely a month goes by without that 99.6% of the variability in adolescent girls’ satisfaction with life former tech luminaries turning on their creation, or the launch of had nothing to do with how much they used social media. a book cataloguing the negative or addictive impacts of digital technologies. But instead of seeing these results as disappointing – as they might be in a journalistic story sense – in science the lack of There are subtle variations, but the core idea peddled by these an expected finding is inherently valuable, making us reconsider, moral entrepreneurs and gurus follows a well-worn script. It challenge and update our notion of how social media is affecting includes headline-grabbing ideas – smartphones are destroying us. a generation, say, or Silicon Valley founders are pushing digital heroin while sending their own children to tech-free schools, or apps are driving teens to self-harm or even suicide.

However, in a world witnessing ecological destruction, political polarisation and growing social divides, should fears about technology really occupy the limited space in the forefront of our minds? Concerns about smartphones might fade away in the coming decade, just as anxieties about video arcades, Dungeons & Dragons and Elvis’s hips did in previous generations.

Unfortunately, the accelerating and highly lucrative hyperbole – of course, there are books to sell, detox clinics to market, speaking tours to book – has left us no closer to an answer to the key questions. Essentially, do digital technologies actually harm our Where do we go from here? Well, it’s probably best to retire the children? And should we, as a society, act rapidly to stop this? The idea that the amount of time teens spend on social media is a basic idea underlying these genuine concerns – one of us writes meaningful metric influencing their wellbeing. There are many also as a parent – is that time spent on digital devices negatively good reasons to be sceptical of the role of Facebook, Snapchat affects young people; kids forgo “organic” opportunities for face- and TikTok in our society but it would be a mistake to assume to-face socialising, opting instead for lower quality experiences science supports fears that every minute online compromises such as app-based Snapstreaks or TikTok reactions. mental health. In fact, this idea risks trivialising and stigmatising those who struggle with mental health on a daily basis. As the story goes, a steady digital diet of this social “junk food” isn’t psychologically nutritious and it crowds out wholesome Moving beyond screen time to explain the interplay between analogue experiences. Consequently, young people are falling technology and the wellbeing of our adolescent population prey to the innovative technological and psychological tricks of requires us to face some tough questions. It’s all well and good the all-powerful puppet masters of Silicon Valley. to remember “neurotransmitter deposits” aren’t a thing, and this goldfish nonsense has been repeatedly debunked. But it remains While it is true that some research suggests that young people the case that we don’t understand fully the impact of big tech on who report higher social media use show slightly lower levels our society. of wellbeing, most of these findings are unreliable and their conclusions might amount to little more than statistical noise. The fact is that much of the data that would enable scientists to uncover the nuanced and complex effects of technology is locked These problems are well known to scientists working on the topic, behind closed doors in Silicon Valley. Until Google, Facebook and but many commentators don’t know – or don’t care – that they are the large gaming companies share the data being saved on to cherry-picking from an evidence base riddled with errors. What’s their servers with every click, tap or swipe on their products, we more, sitting in on the psychiatry conference in London, you’d will be in the dark about the effects of these products on mental have had no way of knowing this is shoddy science. Instead of health. Until then, we’ll all be dancing to the steady drumbeat of speculating about technology effects, we need to test how social monetised fear sold by the moral entrepreneurs. media and life satisfaction influence each other and to do so over time. To that end, for our work (published recently in Proceedings • Andrew Przybylski is Director of Research at the Oxford Internet of the National Academy of Sciences), we focused on a sample of Institute (OII). Amy Orben is a researcher at the OII and a lecturer in more than 10,000 preteens and teens, analysing nearly a decade Psychology at The Queen’s College, University of Oxford. of longitudinal data collected from British adolescents. From The Guardian July 2019 35 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER HAPPY EVER AFTER: 25 ways to live well into old age Susan Saunders and Annabel Streets

When Susan Saunders was 36, her mother was diagnosed with severe dementia. “I had a toddler, a newborn, a full-time job as a TV producer – and I became a carer as well.” As a teenager, she had watched her mum care for her own mother, who had the same condition. “I became determined to do everything I could to increase my chances of ageing well.”

Annabel Streets’ story is similar. When she was a student, her grandfather died from cancer months after he retired; later, she watched her mother care for her grandmother, who lived with dementia and crippling rheumatoid arthritis for nearly 30 years. “When I developed a chronic autoimmune disease, I knew things had to change. But by then I had four young children and there was precious little time for my own health.”

Together, Saunders and Streets started researching the latest science on how to have a healthier, happier old age and how to apply it to their own lives, and blogged about their findings for five years. Their Age Well Project has now been published as a book, compiling almost 100 shortcuts to health in mid and later life and Streets and Saunders, who are both in their 50s, say they have never been in better health.

What did they learn?

LOOK TO YOUR ANCESTORS FOR ANSWERS been found to improve gut health, but was also followed by our distant If you are serious about ageing well, you need to become an expert in forebears, who typically ate supper at sundown, rarely snacked, and your own health – don’t be afraid to ask questions of your doctor and then ate mid-morning the following day. your family. We started our project to age well by compiling ancestral health trees, listing any known illnesses in old age and the causes of BUILD MUSCLE mortality and ages at death of as many direct ancestors as possible. Experts believe resistance training is as important for ageing as We did DNA tests, built records of our blood pressure, blood glucose, aerobic exercise, eating vegetables and sleeping well. After age 40, cholesterol and vitamin D levels, and took note of our BMI and waist- we lose muscle at the rate of 1% a year, increasing our risk of heart to-hip ratio to devise more personalised ageing plans. attacks, strokes and osteoporosis. Recent research found that older adults who did twice-weekly strength training lived longer and with less ENJOY COFFEE illness than those who did none. We like rowing and weight-training Coffee is rich in antioxidants, polyphenols and phenylindane, a for efficiency; we also keep pairs of weights near the kettle and the TV recently identified compound that researchers think may help fend and lift them if we have a few minutes to spare. off Alzheimer’sand Parkinson’s disease. Drinking coffee has also been linked to reduced risks for several cancers, heart disease and type 2 READ BOOKS diabetes. Drink your coffee without sugar or processed syrups, and Although reading is sedentary and solitary, frequent reading has been don’t make it too milky: the antioxidant value appears to drop when linked to longer, healthier life. A Yale study of 3,600 over-50s found milk is added. that reading increased longevity by almost two years; readers of books outlived readers of newspapers and magazines. While those who read WALK FASTER for more than 3.5 hours a week lived longest, the researchers said “30 Walking is good, but pace matters. Brisk walking has been linked to minutes a day was still beneficial”. Meanwhile, every expert seems to better memory, better health and a longer life. Increase your pace recommend reading as a means of getting to sleep. until you are slightly out of breath or sweaty and aim for 30 minutes a day, ideally outdoors to get the additional benefits of vitamin D WORK LONGER and light. New research suggests that those walking first thing in While many of us dream of a golden age of retirement, a 2016 the morning also make better decisions during the day, so consider study found that people who worked longer lived longer, a fact swapping your morning commute for a robust walk. reflected in earlier longitudinal studies that found correlations between retirement and poor health. Researchers speculate that this is because EXERCISE IN GREEN SPACE working usually involves social interaction, movement and a sense of Trees produce phytoncides which help to lower blood pressure, purpose. Several studies have linked retirement with loneliness and reduce stress and boost immunity. The microbes in forest soil have depression. But working long hours year after year is not the answer been found to reduce depression and may contribute to the health of either. Research shows that from mid-life onwards, the sweet spot for our microbiome. A 15-minute walk is all it takes to reap the benefits, health and longevity is working at a less intense pace and perhaps but researchers have found that a weekend in the woods improves for fewer hours. immunity for up to a month, while a short afternoon run or walk somewhere green means better sleep at night. KEEP LEARNING Old brains are just as equipped to build new neurons and synapses as young ones. But this process works best when we repeatedly force ourselves to learn new things. The brain loves novelty: crafts, games, FAST EVERY DAY even cooking from a new recipe, all trigger the creation of neurons, but Our bodies have adapted to go without food for short periods – the the more complex and more difficult the new activity is, the greater the surprise has been discovering how beneficial this is for many of us. rewards. Choose something that also involves social interaction and Intermittent fasting, made famous by Michael Mosley’s popular 5:2 a bit of movement, such as singing. Best of all, try learning complex diet, is a proven method for increasing longevity. It also appears new dance moves. to fend off Alzheimer’s, type 2 diabetes and weight gain. There are several forms of fasting and it is important to find one that suits your TAKE A NAP lifestyle. We like the extended overnight fast of 14-16 hours, which has Several studies have found that nappers have better attention and 36 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER

focus, better memory and better non-verbal reasoning. Oddly, nappers running or skipping, also increases bone density. Resistance training also appear to sleep better at night (with the proviso that your nap such as lifting weights also boosts bones, but exerts less pressure shouldn’t be taken too late in the afternoon). A Nasa study found that on joints. If that all sounds too sweaty, ballroom dancing improves sleepy pilots had a 45% improvement in performance and a 100% balance and coordination, resulting in fewer falls and fractures. improvement in alertness after a short nap. But the key is to keep the nap short (about 30 minutes). Studies consistently show that naps CULTIVATE FRIENDSHIPS of more than 90 minutes can be detrimental to our health. Loneliness is as big a mortality risk as diabetes. Research links social isolation to dementia, heart disease, stroke, depression and a 29% CLEAR OUT YOUR MEDICINE CABINET greater risk of dying. An eight-decade study found a clear correlation In particular, clear out unnecessary anticholinergics, often found in between having a large social network and living longer. More recent antidepressants, bladder drugs, medication for Parkinson’s disease research shows the quality of friendships also helps keep us alive: and some antihistamines and travel sickness pills. This isn’t something ask yourself if your friends stimulate you and if they have a positive you should do without your doctor’s guidance, but several studies outlook. Helping and caring for others also strongly correlates with have now linked ingesting high levels of anticholinergics with the onset longevity. of Alzheimer’s, even if taken for as little as a year. Ask your doctor for alternative medication, particularly if you are taking several pills SUPPORT IMMUNITY containing anticholinergics. It is often thought the immune system weakens with age, but research indicates that the reverse may be true: the immune system actually ONLY SPEND ON VITAMIN D AND ZINC overreacts as we get older, creating more inflammation in the body Study after study has found that supplements have very little benefit; when it is confronted by a virus, for example and speeding up the we invest in good food instead. However, when it comes to vitamin ageing process. With 70% of the immune system located in the gut, D and zinc, the data is robust: vitamin D – in the right dosage – gut health is key. Support your immune system with a diet high in dark can help us age well while zinc has been shown to reduce the severity leafy greens, brassicas (such as cabbage and broccoli), alliums (such of coughs and colds. Those of us in the northern hemisphere aren’t as garlic, leeks and onions) and mushrooms. Shiitake mushrooms, in able to get the sunlight necessary for the body to make vitamin D, so particular, have been found to have a powerful effect on the immune a supplement of at least 1,000 iu daily during the winter months is system. If you have a cold, try a simple miso soup with mushrooms, recommended by some ageing experts. ginger and greens.

AVOID POLLUTION Pollution is rapidly becoming the biggest threat to our ability to age CHANGE HOW YOU EAT, PARTICULARLY IN THE EVENING well, with more and more research linking particulate matter to lung Changing how you eat, rather than what you eat, can make a cancer, heart disease, dementia, hypertension and diabetes. It is vital bigger impact on longevity than a radical dietary overhaul. Piles of that we are vociferous in lobbying for cleaner air and that we play vegetables, whole grains, pulses and lean protein fill up our plates our part in reducing our own personal pollution footprints. But we can now. We also aim to eat earlier, whenever possible, to allow digestion lessen the damage of living in heavily polluted cities. Avoid congested to kick in well before bedtime. This means less disturbed sleep and a roads, switch to an anti-inflammatory diet (shown to mitigate the effects longer overnight fast, too. Eating earlier has enabled us to eat more of pollution in some people), invest in a good quality air purifier and slowly – an essential but overlooked factor in the Mediterranean diet, rotate it round your house, and fill your house with pollution-fighting allowing satiety hormones to kick in. And when we have eaten, we greenery. stop. Constant grazing and snacking means that the digestive system is permanently working – and therefore also permanently producing USE OLIVE OIL insulin, potentially leading to insulin resistance, a precursor to diabetes. We think of olive oil as “liquid gold”, such are its benefits, with improved heart health topping the list. A four-and-a-half year clinical ADD TURMERIC trial involving 7,000 older adults at risk of heart disease found that A natural anti-inflammatory, turmeric has been linked to a reduced those eating an olive oil-rich Mediterranean diet had 30% fewer risk of Alzheimer’s, cancer and liver disease. It is also antiseptic, instances of heart attacks and strokes, as well as improved lipid and antibacterial and packed with antioxidants. Research suggests that cholesterol levels, and lower blood pressure. Olive oil consumption curcumin, turmeric’s active ingredient, appears to counteract the has also been linked to a slowing of the progression of breast cancer, low-grade, chronic inflammation that increases with age – it may reduced bone mass loss and better blood glucose control. Use it to also improve brain function. Other studies have linked curcumin cook or dress multicoloured vegetables. supplementation to reduced pain for arthritis sufferers, improved liver function and some relief from irritable bowel syndrome symptoms. BUILD BONE DENSITY Start your day with our turmeric sunrise tonic: a cup of warm water, The adage, use it or lose it, is never truer than when applied to bone 1 tbs apple cider vinegar, 1 tsp turmeric, ½ tsp black pepper (which strength. And it’s very specific: research has shown that professional seems to increase absorption rates of curcumin) and ½ tsp ginger tennis players have much higher bone density in their serving arm pulp. Add honey to taste and stir well. than their non-serving arm. The most beneficial exercise, if your joints are up to it, is jumping – try to jump 10 to 20 times a day with a MEDITATE 30-second rest between each. Other high-impact exercise, such as Meditation isn’t just hippie woo woo: research shows it has a powerful

“I BECAME DETERMINED TO DO EVERYTHING I COULD TO INCREASE MY CHANCES OF AGEING WELL.”

37 THE INSTITUTE OF GUIDANCE COUNSELLORS NEWSLETTER effect on the brain. It appears to reduce stress and promote empathy, LOOK AFTER YOUR EYES and regular practitioners seem not to lose grey matter, or suffer The best ways to protect our eyes are to avoid smoking, keep active reduced concentration, as they age. Just 15 minutes a day is enough to and eat healthily, including foods rich in macular pigments – anything strengthen telomeres, the “caps” that protect our DNA and, according bright yellow, orange or green is a rich source. Include plenty of to a Harvard study, to have a positive impact on blood pressure levels. vegetables such as corn on the cob, orange peppers, carrots and A very specific form of meditation, Kirtan Kriya, involving chanting and kale in your diet. Regular eye tests are a must: eyesight changes finger movements, stabilises brain synapses and increases cerebral rapidly after the age of 40. Wear good-quality sunglasses on sunny blood flow – researchers concluded that it should be considered for days, even in winter, and take regular breaks if you spend a lot of your Alzheimer’s disease prevention. Can’t spare 15 minutes? Take a few day looking at an electronic screen. moments to focus on your breath or your surroundings to promote a feeling of calm. WALK A DOG The health benefits of owning a dog are obvious: dogs need walking, EAT MORE FIBRE caring for and routine, all of which help us age better. A study of more If you make just one dietary change to boost longevity, make it this one. than 3 million Swedes aged 40 to 80 found that dog owners had a An Australian study tracked the diets of 1,600 people over 10 years lower risk of death due to all causes. Pet owners also have lower blood to discover the impact of carbohydrate consumption on successful pressure and cholesterol than non-pet owners: stroking an animal ageing. The most successful agers (those most free of disease after a lowers levels of the stress hormone cortisol. Having a dog means that decade) were the ones with the highest fibre intake – usually from fruit, your home might not be as clean as it could be – and that’s a good wholegrain bread and oats. The researchers suggested two possible thing. Dog ownership increases the quantity of 56 classes of bacterial reasons for this: fibre slows the digestion of food, thus keeping insulin species in the home, which in turns boosts gut health. levels in check, which in turn reduces inflammation (a key trigger of ageing); and some types of fibre ferment in the body, producing short- CULTIVATE OPTIMISM chain fatty acids, which also dampen inflammation. Fibre also helps Studies have found that older people with a negative attitude to reduce cholesterol levels, which in turn supports heart health, and ageing have worse functional health, slower walking speeds and lower lowers colorectal cancer risk by moving food through the gut quickly. cognitive abilities than those with a more positive attitude. Negativity, The recommended daily intake of fibre is 30g; the UK average is unsurprisingly, puts stress on the body, elevating cortisol levels, which 18g. A daily cup of beans or pulses, plus quality whole grains such in the long term can impact heart health, sleep quality, weight and as brown rice, quinoa and granary bread, will help boost your intake. cognition. You really are as old as you feel, it seems.

AVOID BLUE LIGHT IN THE EVENINGS • The Age Well Project: Easy Ways to a Longer, Healthier, Happier Life Our electronic devices play havoc with our delicate circadian rhythms. by Annabel Streets and Susan Saunders (Piatkus, £14.99). To order Screens produce blue light, which helps wake us up in the morning, a copy for £12.99, go to guardianbookshop.com From the Guardian but at night suppresses production of melatonin, the vital sleep- (May 2019). inducing hormone. Control your exposure by adding time-sensitive filters that block blue light from your laptop and phone; set an alarm to remind you to start a pre-bed wind-down; and keep electronics out of the bedroom.

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