See discussions, stats, and author profiles for this publication at: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/327944201

Gaslighting and the knot theory of mind

Preprint · September 2018 DOI: 10.13140/RG.2.2.30838.86082

CITATIONS READS 0 3,521

1 author:

Domina Petric UHC Split

101 PUBLICATIONS 0 CITATIONS

SEE PROFILE

Some of the authors of this publication are also working on these related projects:

Vaccines View project

Antimicrobial agents View project

All content following this page was uploaded by Domina Petric on 28 September 2018.

The user has requested enhancement of the downloaded file. and the knot theory of mind

Domina Petric, MD

(4). Signs of gaslighting are witholding

ABSTRACT from the victim, countering information to fit the abuser´s perspective, Aim is to discuss gaslighting and to discounting information, verbal provide advices how to recognize the (usually in the form of offensive jokes), abuser and how to defend oneself from the blocking and diverting the victim´s gaslighting. from outside sources, trivializing the victim´s worth and undermining victim

INTRODUCTION TO GASLIGHTING by gradually weakening them and their thought process (5). Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that seeks to sow seeds of Three most common methods of doubt in a targeted or in gaslighting are hiding, changing and members of a targeted group, making them control. The abuser wants to hide things question their own memory, perception and from the victim, change and sanity. Using persistent , something about the victim so that the misdirection, contradiction and lying, it victim molds into abuser´s fantasy and attempts to destabilize the victim and fully control the victim (6). delegitimize the victim´s (1, 2). Gaslighting can occur in private Sociopaths and narcissists use gaslighting relationships, in as a form of tactics. Sociopaths consistently transgress , on the work as a form of social mores, break laws and exploit , or can be institutional and others, but typically also are convincing systematic. liars, sometimes charming ones, who Gaslighting in the can occur consistently deny wrongdoing. Thus, some when perform actions that who have been victimized by sociopaths cause colleagues to question themselves may doubt their own perception (3). and their actions in a way that is The abuser wants full control of feelings, detrimental to their careers (7). The victim thoughts or actions of the victim. The may be deliberately excluded, made the abuser discreetly emotionally the subject of , or persistently victim in hostile, abusive or coercive ways discredited or questioned in an attempt to

1 destroy the victim´s confidence. The Gaslighters like to question the victim´s perpetrator may reroute conversations to sanity so that the victim loses credibility. perceived faults or wrongs (8). Gaslighting Gaslighters often have double standards so can be committed by any colleague and that the targeted individual feels isolated can be especially detrimental when the and marginalized. Very popular tactic is perpetrator is someone in a position of the warm-cold behavior. The perpetrator power (9). is sometimes throwing the victim in the positive to confuse the Systematic and institutional gaslighting victim (10) and the rest of the time is being occurs in totalitarian and corrupted regimes very abusive and cold. Gaslighters also like (communism, nazism, fascism, organized to project their flaws on the victim and crime) when the group of abusers that steal creative ideas and merits from the serve the totalitarian regime and organized victim. For example, incompetent abusive crime abuse a targeted group of honest boss will try to present the victim as individuals that oppose to totalitarianism incompetent and steal the victim´s merits. and crime.

HOW TO DEFEND ONESELF FROM GASLIGHTING AND THE KNOT THE GASLIGHTING THEORY OF MIND Gaslighters use toxic Gaslighting is a powerful weapon of the (pathological negative emotions) such as abuser and can be very detrimental for the hatred and to damage the victim´s victim. Gaslighting, especially when it is emotional and cognitive health. The victim long lasting, can cause , should never internalize the abuser´s and even . Mental and emotional negative emotions and thoughts about abuse causes the formation of many knots oneself. It is very important to use only of negative thoughts and emotions with healthy negative emotions (for example, cognitive and emotional damage. This type healthy ) when defending and to of abusers (the gaslighters) like to break avoid developing pathological negative the victim´s introspective mirror so that the emotions (hatred, rage, depression, victim starts to doubt in oneself. Very pathological , pathological anxiety). powerful weapon of the gaslighters is It is very important not to feel hatred gossip. Abusers often slander their victims towards the abuser because hatred is and are often very persistent in lying.

2 always toxic for emotional health. The (disentanglement of the knots) might be victim should always look for the positive helpful for the victims of gaslighting. stimuli so that the balance between positive and negative emotions and thoughts is maintained. After the conflict REFERENCES: with the abuser is finished, it is very 1. Oxford Dictionaries (April 20, 2016). important to restore the homeostasis of the Retrieved from mind and to feel positive emotions (love, https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definitio joy, gratitude) and think positive about n/gaslight oneself. 2. Dorpat TL. On the double whammy and It is very important to raise awareness in gaslighting. & the society about gaslighting and to use Psychotherapy, 1994;11(1):91-96. social measures to prevent gaslighting in the school, at workplace, in the institutions 3. Stout M. The Sociopath Next Door. and private relationships. High quality Random House Digital, 2014:94-95. legislative measures that protect victims 4. Dorpat TL. Crimes of : from gaslighting (bullying, mobbing, America´s Culture of Violence. Algora institutional gaslighting, , Publishing, 2007:118-130. private gaslighting) are mandatory. 5. Evans P. The Verbally Abusive

Relationship: How to Recognize it and CONCLUSION How to Respond. Holbrook, Mass: Adams Media , 1996. Gaslighting is very dangerous form of psychological manipulation and abuse that 6. Greenberg E. Are You Being Gaslighted can occur in private relationships, in the By the Narcissist in Your Life? school, at workplace and systematically. Psychology Today. Sussex Publisher The consequences of the gaslighting can be (September 17, 2017). Retrieved from devastating. It is very important to raise https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog awareness in the society about gaslighting /understanding-/201709/are- and to provide high quality legislative you-being-gaslighted-the-narcissist-in- measures that will protect all the victims of your-life the gaslighting. The knot psychotherapy

3

7. Portnow KE. Dialogues of doubt: The psychology of self-doubt and emotional gaslighting in adult women and men (1997). Retrieved from https://elibrary.ru/item.asp?id=5572602

8. Young S. Gaslighting at work-when you think you are going crazy (July 22, 2016). Retrieved from https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/gaslightin g-work-when-you-think-going-crazy- samantha-young/

9. Simon G. Gaslighting as a Manipulation Tactic: What It Is. Who Does It, And Why (November 8, 2011). https://counsellingresource.com/features/2 011/11/08/gaslighting/

10. Sarkis SA. 11 Warning Signs of Gaslighting (January 22, 2017). Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog /here-there-and-everywhere/201701/11- warning-signs-gaslighting

4

View publication stats