The Hampden-Sydney Tiger

THE HAMPDEN-SYDNEY TIGER

November 10th, 2017 The Macon Week Issue Volume XCVIII.5 Administration Looking to Hire “Director of High Adventure” tor of High Adventure would do. The second question was: Since Dean Sabbitini answered that, yes, surely increase and become healthier. The first question I planned for the Outsiders Club already exists on the school is considering build- Including a rock wall, ropes course, Dean Sabbatini was: What is the ne- campus and has a very large member ing these activities. He said, “We and zipline to the campus would be Brad Murawski ’19 cessity of having a director of high base, will the Director of High Ad- are thinking about possibly build- a great attraction for prospective stu- Staff Writer adventure for the college? His re- venture replace the Outsiders Club? ing a high ropes course, a rock dents—who wouldn’t want to go to a sponse was that “there is a big push Dean Sabbitini clarified that “the climbing wall, and even a zipline school with a zipline? Besides adding for the outdoor life here on campus director will work with the Outsid- over Tadpole Pond. These activities new things to the campus, new plans A recent job posting for a Direc- and we want a formalized program ers Club. There will be coordination would be great team building ex- for the Wilson Trail are a wonderful tor of High Adventure at Hampden- for it. In order to do so, we need an between the club and the director.” ercises, and will help create a more idea. The Wilson Trail is a great ex- Sydney has been posted by Ham- individual to oversee that. The ad- It sounds like the Outsiders Club exciting place for prospective stu- perience to walk through the nature den-Sydney. This position sounds ministration discussed it with Presi- and the Director of High Adven- dents. We also want to expand on around campus, and if there is a di- interesting, but what exactly would dent Stimpert and he gave approval ture will work together, but the two activities with the Wilson Trail.” rector to coordinate events, the trail a “director of high adventure” do, for us to get one.” From Dean Sab- will still be able to organize their Dean Sabbitini’s information would be used more often, and more and does Hampden-Sydney really batini’s response it seems that the own separate events from each other. about the Director of High Adven- people would see the beauty of the need one? With these questions in plan to find the director has been The third and final ques- ture is greatly appreciated, because campus. The addition of a Director of mind, I got the chance to sit down talked about for quite some time and tion was: Does the search for this it gives our students things to look High Adventure would be a great asset and speak with the Dean of Students, now the ideas are coming together director imply that the school is forward to in the school’s future. to our school and the students should Dean Sabbatini, to receive clarifica- to finish the process of coordinating thinking about building high ad- With the addition of this director, look forward to the activities that tion about what exactly the Direc- high adventure activities on campus. venture activities on campus? the school’s outdoor campus life will would result from the hiring of one. Musical Traditions Continue on the Hill rable events around campus this fall. Many of us know that Hamp- up and down the East Coast. With future. They were seen in the KA Reed Cooper ’19 Other than the fact that we were all den-Sydney has had a long tra- a relaxing acoustic guitar player as bunker and on the Pika deck this fall. Guest Contributor blessed to have six home football dition of bringing spectacular their lead singer, and a jamming The Southern Belles are an- games, many of those weekends in- live music to this campus, and saxophone player, these guys know other band that is gaining national As the semester begins to wind cluded some of the best live music this semester was no different. to play a groove and work a party. attention and playing across all time down and final exams are loom- this campus has seen in recent years, Kendall Street Company is With mashups from Wiz Khalifa to zones with their mix of psychedelic ing around the corner, it is time to with many of the bands quickly one band that is quickly gaining a The Beatles, this is a band to certainly funk and southern rock. The South- reflect on some of the more memo- becoming breakthrough artists. huge following across the state and look out for at bigger venues in the ern Belles hail from Richmond and In this issue... Continued on page 3 Word Wall, pg. 2 H-SC needs recycling, The Randolph-Macon The Game could decide Album review, pg. 8 pg. 3 Cooter, pg. 4 conference; soccer season recap, pg. 7 Page 2 The Hampden-Sydney Tiger November 10th, 2017 INFO The Hampden-Sydney Tiger Word Wall Founded 31 January 1920 Middle English readers could tell the printed in 1611, the printers saved on by J. B. Wall ’19 David Bushhouse ’19 difference between voiced and voice- type by simply using the letter ‘Y,’ but News Editor less ‘th’ sound based on context, even all literate English speakers would Wes Kuegler Max Dash Some spelling irregularities— though both sounds were encoded have known to pronounce those Editor-in-Chief Associate Editor especially in English—do not arise with þ. Later that century, however, words with a ‘th’ sound. Thus, ‘Ye from evolving language use, as we the ‘th’ digraph (two letters that encode Olde Shoppe’ would have been pro- Ryan Yost David Bushhouse a single sound; ‘sh’ is another exam- nounced ‘The old shop.’ Shortly after Copy Editor News Editor saw with ‘forty,’ but instead arise from merging alphabets. Since Old ple) became more and more popular. this period, ‘th’ became fully ubiq- Ian O’Malley Shelby Hanna English developed as an Anglo-Sax- Over the next 200 years, the uitous, and þ died out completely. Sports Editor Opinion Editor on language culturally influenced by popularity of þ steadily declined, By studying two extinct char- the Romans and Norwegian Vikings, until it was only used in common acters from Middle English, we’ve Staff Writers John Pionzio the letters used in the Old English al- words like ‘þe’ (‘the’). Simultane- learned all about consonantal voic- Chad Pisano Business Manager phabet were derived from both Latin ous with that decline in þ’s popular- ing, and that ‘ye’ was always pro- Robert Morris characters and Nordic runes. Howev- ity, the character itself underwent nounced ‘the,’ despite what pseu- Hank Hollingshead er, the arrival of Christian missionar- scribal evolution as scribes began to do-medieval kitsch boutiques Arthur White write the character more like a ‘P,’ would have you believe. Next is- Brad Murawski ies, the Norman Conquest in 1066, and the rise of the printing press all and eventually like a curvy ‘Y’ (þ › p sue, we’ll see learn about the ori- Steven Dvornick › y). When the King James Bible was gin of ‘W’ (HINT: It’s a double ‘U’). Garret Barton III contributed to an all-out Latin take- Stewart Thames IV over of the English writing system during the Medieval Era. As a result, Middle English saw runic symbols Guest Contributors replaced and Anglo-Saxon sounds Griffin Salyer Reed Cooper spelled out with Latin characters. In this first installment, we’ll Advisor look at Thorn and Eth. Thorn (Þ [up- Dr. James Frusetta percase], þ [lowercase]) was a runic character derived from the Norse rune Thurs (same Norse root as Requests for subscriptions may be mailed to: Thor and Thursday) that made a ‘th’ sound, as in ‘thief’ and ‘think.’ Eth (Ð [uppercase], ð [lowercase]) was Tiger Subscriptions a Scandinavian character (actually Brown Student Center, Box 1017 of Latin origin) that made a differ- Hampden-Sydney, VA 23943 ent ‘th’ sound, as in ‘that’ and ‘there.’ Pay close attention to the way OR found online at: http://www.hsc.edu/News/Communications/ those two ‘th’ sounds are pronounced Request-Forms/Tiger-Subscriptions.html (try placing a hand on your throat as you alternate). The only difference between them is what linguists call voicing. For þ, the sound is voiceless, Contact The Tiger by e-mail, phone, fax, or social media: meaning that the sound is produced [email protected] facebook.com/HSCTiger1776 by simply passing air through the ph. (434) 547-9030 Twitter: @TheHSCTiger mouth, without the use of the vo- Instagram: @thehsctiger cal cords. For ð, the mouth is held in the same position, but the sound is produced by engaging the vocal We accept submissions in the form of letters or guest columns. Brevity is cords, which you can feel as vibra- encouraged. Interested writers, cartoonists, and photographers can send us an e-mail at [email protected]. tion. Nearly all consonants have a voiceless/voiced counterpart. Try out The Hampden-Sydney Tiger is a student newspaper serving the community of all the consonants to see if you can Hampden-Sydney and operating independently of the College. The Tiger is pair them up! To get you started, ‘F’ printed, roughly, biweekly by The Farmville Herald. is the voiceless counterpart for ‘V.’ Over time, þ and ð started to be History on the Hill: 1931 Kaleidoscope The views expressed in ‘Letters to the Editor’ do not reflect any offical used interchangeably, until ð fell out views or policies of The Hampden-Sydney Tiger. of use in the 1300s. Then, as today, ad for Hampden-Sydney College November 10th, 2017 The Hampden-Sydney Tiger Page 3 EDITORIALS What Would Thoreau Do?

institutions of higher learning, let the post office). Many other colleges, Chad Pisano ’19 alone schools in general, that does true to their nature as bastions of lib- Staff Writer not have any recycling programs. eralism, have all sorts of sorting cat- Although this may not be con- egories composed of bins and chutes Hampden-Sydney College is cerning to much of our student body, allowing for multiple levels of glass, an institution that prides itself on it should be. As Hampden-Sydney plastic, and other forms of recycling. its outdoorsy spirit. Our Outsiders continues to attempt to revamp itself Perhaps one of the reasons that we Club is one of the largest, most well- in rather radical ways, ranging from lack major recycling receptacles here funded, and active clubs on campus. Every day, whether one is in class or walking across grounds, one sees “. . . our college seems to be one of such luxury outdoor brands that one theorizes Patagonia, Columbia, and the only schools. . . that does not L.L. Bean could easily justify open- ing a kiosk on campus. If one walks into the H-SC bookstore, he might implementinghave aany new “academic recycling mas- is a lack programs.” of facilities that can process think that these brands already did ter plan” to changing our semester this waste around us. But as one of open their own stores and merely schedule, we risk falling behind other two major historied colleges in the forgot to switch out the store logo schools as far as common and obvious area (one of which has received sig- for their own. Despite all this appar- modernization efforts go. As someone nificant investment from the state of ent affinity for the wilderness that decently well-traveled with relatives Virginia), surely such a facility could one would assume after a quick jaunt all over the country, I can confidently come about from student efforts. around the Hill, the impartial ob- say that this is one of the only places The biggest challenge facing server would likely come away with I have ever been that is without recy- the campus in getting recycling is another other basic impression—our cling bins (outside of our shredding not the lack of existing infrastruc- college seems to be one of the only bins in Morton or the one station in ture however. One major challenge Continued on page 8 Photo: wikimedia.org Musical Traditions Continued have played nationally recognized the way from Nashville to rock into summer’s Floydfest for the best new acts such as Blues Traveler, Moon on the radar for national stardom. festivals such as Lockn’ and Floy- the early morning hours on October and upcoming band. This award gives Taxi, and The Wailers. Perhaps one The live music tradition is one dfest. They jammed out in the Phi 21st. This group continues to im- them the chance to play on next year’s of the most real deal bands this cam- that makes this small college com- Gam house earlier this semester. press as they perform across all of main stage at the festival and will for pus has seen this semester, these guys munity truly special, and this se- Kappa Sigma hosted a number the major cities along the East Coast. sure skyrocket them into a chance put on an unforgettable show that mester did not disappoint in these of solid shows this semester with two Perhaps one of the more popular of stardom. They played on the Pika is for sure to wake up an audience. regards by any means. From bands of the most prominent being from bands on campus since their perfor- deck and at Chi Phi’s homecoming. Atlas Road Crew is a band that hailing from Richmond to Nashville, Of Good Nature and Maradeen. mance at last year’s Wednesday night Waker is a seven-piece rock and made its return to the circle after two this campus was able to see younger Of Good Nature rocked the back Greek Week show, South Hill Banks soul band that hails from Nashville long years to rock the KA deck. With acts looking for fame as well as some deck during the day for homecom- made two appearances on the Hill that rocked the front yard of SAE for southern rock vibes good enough to acts with already well-established ing with their groove of indie rock this fall. The progressive bluegrass homecoming this year. These guys cut through you, they were a must- fan bases across the country. With and reggae. These guys originate band from Richmond continues to have national recognition and have see event. From original songs to this semester coming to a close, we from Charlotte, North Carolina kill it whenever they get on stage, and played many top-tier festivals and playing covers and mash-ups every- can only look forward to what the and recently had an album crack the they’ve impressed people all across venues such as Austin City Limits, one knows, these guys know how to spring has in store for us with some Top 5 on iTunes for Top Reggae Al- the state. They recently won the “On Hangout, Bonnaroo, and Firefly. work a party. With an unforgettable more impressive live concerts in store. bum. Maradeen came to the Hill all the Rise” competition at this past They have also toured with famous encore of Free Bird, these guys are THE RANDOLPH-MACON COOTER Note: The following three pages are satirical in nature. The Cooter is part of a long tradition of healthy rivalry between H-SC and R-MC. Interview with the Director of Phi Beta Kappa Lowers Standards Once Again ‘High’ Adventure accepted to Phi Beta Kappa, I’ll be Sarah “Red” Knees ’20 well on my way to securing that man- Srat Correspondent ager spot once I’m forty,” Stud contin- Me: This interview is about your new game. Participants will be able to be a On Tuesday, November 7th the ued, “And then I’m basically set, right?” job as the DHA. What sort of things werewolf or a vampire and do all kinds Director of the Randolph-Macon Other students shared similar senti- Willum Piddlins TBD do you do at that job? of cool stuff like rock climbing and College Chapter of Phi Beta Kappa ment, and there is a general feeling of Prospective Student Beanbolly: That’s a very good ques- puzzles to get to the end of the event. announced, in conjunction with the excitement about these new standards, tion. When I took over from Dr. It’s an experience designed to be fun, President, that they would be lower- with over 70% of the student body Mundlebint, he’d left a lot of notes on safe, and educational. ing admissions standards, now for the now a member of Phi Beta Kappa. I am happy to write about an inter- his desk about what his plans were for Me: But what about the students who fifth time in three years. To be admit- However, it isn’t just students view with the new Director of High the High Adventure projects. In his were lost and suspected of being killed ted, students will now be required to who are excited by this new develop- Adventure, Professor Beanbolly, class memory, I’ve been working on pro- and eaten by bears during last se- maintain a 1.2 GPA, with no more ment. Rand O’Guy has lived around of ’09, who took up the position in ducing his ideas. He had all kinds of mester’s “Wild Pokémon Adventure” than 75 percent of their credit hours Randolph-Macon for fifty years and September after the last Director, Dr. really epic camping trips planned, and game? having been earned in “zero-hundred” has finally been accepted as a mem- Mundlebint, class of ’05, tragically I heard that he worked really late writ- Beanbolly: Allegedly. The students level classes, the President’s first ma- ber of R-MC Phi Beta Kappa. Said passed away in a fatal shoe tying ac- ing campfire songs. That just shows were only allegedly killed and eaten jor initiative since joining the col- O’Guy, “Back when me was your age, cident. how dedicated to his work he was. by bears. Since we still haven’t found lege. Additionally, students will be I was never accepted to the school, I met with the professor in a nice Me: So, who all can go on these ad- enough remains to prove that any- required to pass a second grade spell- but they’s finally accepted me to Tri café. I don’t remember what it was ventures? one actually died, we can assume ing exam (down from the previous Eta Sigma, or whatever it’s called. called, but you should go to it. It’s real- Beanbolly: It’s open to anyone. It’s that they’re safe somewhere. There’s seventh grade spelling requirement). The Cooter tried to reach out ly nice. Prof. Beanbolly was dressed in free to students and faculty who pay no reason to go into a panic and as- “This will really help me negotiate to a national representative of Phi sunglasses and a bowler hat, showing the $200 fee, so I definitely encourage sume someone’s dead just because with my future manager at McDon- Beta Kappa, but they only insisted off his sense of style. We both ordered you to try it out. they haven’t been around for a few ald’s to pay me more than the mini- that they “have never and will never a manly serving of hot chocolate, and Me: I will. Do you have any other months. I mean, they’d be upset about mum wage,” said seventh-year student open a chapter of Phi Beta Kap- I started asking questions. ideas for the project? that when they got back. I’m sure that F. “Ratty” Stud. “Now that I’ve been pa at Randolph-Macon College.” Me: Good morning. Beanbolly: I’ve been working on a re- they’re still out there having a great Beanbolly: Afternoon, Willum. What ally exciting project. It’s going to be a time, and that’s what High Adventure did you want to ask about? Twilight-themed outdoor adventure Continued on page 6 Happy Birthday Beats

fight song and replace it with the Dr. Dray Happy Birthday song so it can pump Wandering Professor of Musicology up the crowds during sports games. Shakespeare’s works are referred The biggest artists in history can- to as classics. Beethoven and Bach are not touch the numbers that Patty viewed as geniuses in music. Da Vinci and Mildred Hill do when it comes is regarded as a master artist. None to everyone knowing their song. of these men’s works compare to the Drake? Taylor Swift? Justin Bieber? sheer creativity of Patty and Mildred Elvis? The Beatles? Pink Floyd? Mi- Hill, the attributed creators of the chael Jackson? They are all under the Happy Birthday Song. This song has it shadow of success that the Happy all: memorable lyrics, an unbelievably Birthday song has achieved. This song catchy melody, and a hair-raising beat. has transcended all eras of music and The Happy Birthday song is guaran- overcome genre changes to remain the teed to get your party lit to unimagi- most well-known song in the mod- nable levels. With such an incredible ern English language. Students across song, Randolph-Macon College has R-MC have this song on repeat and Photo: leafly.com decided to trash its current school cannot get enough of the masterpiece. November 10th, 2017 The Randolph-Macon Cooter Page 5 Thoughts and Stuff A Dangerous ‘Lack of Frat’: Why Kegs Have to Go

this issue, I propose a simple yet effec- drink during the course of a night, I capes me. Things are much safer when path to class. Instead, these cups will tive solution: ban kegs on campus. Yes, say “no bid, feline friend.” Regardless someone is drinking from a handle of be replaced by beautiful and easy to I mean kill that beloved shrine of our of your typical Friday night schedule, hard liquor, as there is less of it to fill clean cans, not to mention fun glass Reggie “Regular” Legs ‘19 drunken debauchery once and for all. I think all students can agree that get- up one’s stomach and make him feel bottles, which will glitter in the sun- Meatball While many students may say ting rid of kegs is a good move for our nauseous or even worse, vomit. As light as they return to the earth in the that such an effort is shortsighted and school. No photos of students doing we all surely know, it is much easier form of neat shards. In short, banning cruel to students that are able to re- ridiculous keg stands will circulate, to pace oneself with a small amount kegs will allow us to cut down on the It’s no secret that Randolph- sponsibly drink, I say “bollocks!” There and no one is at risk of losing track of alcohol that gets you more drunk classic but dangerous keg and solo Macon College has a reputation as a is no such thing as responsible con- of drink after drink that they pull than with a large amount that is less party, and will allow us to replace these drinking school - the exploits of our sumption of alcohol. The very nature from the keg. Instead, students will potent. Besides, the economics de- standard sets of alcohol with mysteri- fraternities are legendary. Yet all of of drinking means that your second be forced to go to the gym in order partment will applaud us for our ef- ous party punch, hard liquor, and in- this success has come at the expense drink is objectively irresponsible, and to replace keg stands with real, le- ficiency. No longer will the plight of numerable glass bottles, ensuring of our academics. While drinking your next even more, and so forth. To gitimate forms of exercise like pilates. red solo cups torture students walking that a fun and safe time is had for all! rates rise, GPAs fall. In order to tackle those who claim that they only have a Why we haven’t tired this yet es- around campus, littering their every

A Booming Market: R-MC Must We Need Easier Invest in Widgets Majors to major and minor but im not sure i understand fully the logic behind Disheartened, I consigned myself to that this bonanza was simply unrec- why there have to be so many of these the fact that neither I nor the Unit- ognized as the treasure trove it truly is. Mike Rotch ‘19 that go into them. If it were up to I, Bobby “Baby” Legs ‘20 ed States Government would ever Now, with my complete data set, I Guy Running for Student Body Prez which it honestly should be because Reggie’s Little Bro be able to purchase a single widget. have come to the conclusion that now I be the first to tell you that kin- of my credentials from highschool, we Imagine my surprise, then, is the time to invest in widgets, which dergarden mathematics is an over- should have majors that encompass As any economics student on this when the very next day my teacher will not only prove to be eminently demanding, exhausting and unruly less unrealistic goals and more realis- campus could easily explain, there is told us the most shocking news I have practical but hugely profitable when course for the excellent students here tic everyday skills. I would not see the a specter haunting the free market. ever heard in my life: Donald Trump we use my revolutionary data to sell at Randolph-Macon. This is one ex- real problem with a course in online What exactly is that specter, one may had been elected President of the these tools at exactly the right time. ample only of the unrealistically chal- gaming, or board game skill. Maybe, ask? Well, I’ll tell you: it’s the incom- United States. After this initial sur- We can generate a near infinite profit lenging coursework that Randolph- even a course in basic reading at a fun- ing storm of widgets. To the unin- prise, I was stunned even more when with these little things! As soon as au- Macon is completely, entirely overrun damental level so that when we get in formed, widgets may seem strange, she told us that widgets were now thorization is received from the school, with. Another Example would be the this “real world” we have some funda- but a widget is actually “a gadget or not just affordable, but almost infi- rest assured that your money (and vocationally studies courses that teach mental skills to allow us to live peace- mechanical contrivance,” which is de- nitely cheap and without any sort of your widgets) will be in safe hands. us skills we could use in the real world. fully in mom’s basement. We might signed to be of great use. While this demand. Because of the seeming im- The enterprising entrepreneur I don’t understand simply why we even consider adding a Mom’s Base- might not instantly sell many people possibility of this variance in prices, I need not despair that there is a lost need to have skills for the ‘real’ world ment major to fit with our student on widgets, there is another positive decided to track the fluctuating price opportunity here, however! In or- when we live in a perfectly real world body sense we know how often that is trait that they have—their highly of widgets throughout the semester. der to properly publicize this eco- today in 2017. Just because the earth the first gig a majority of our student volatile market. Just the other day, At first, I was shocked that my pro- nomic boon and consult about the was founded 2000 years ago doesn’t body has. I think what we need to rival I was sitting in my economics class fessor would reveal such detailed and proper course of action for the col- mean that this day and age isn’t schools like the local highschools are as my teacher informed me that the valuable information to students while lege, I will convene the First Annual any less real than that day and age. a comprehensive program that engulfs market for widgets had a fully in- it seemed like no one was capitalizing Widget Conference, hosted by yours Do not even get me started then all of the tedious work done by others elastic demand (effectively making on these investment opportunities. truly, in McIlwaine 112 on Decem- on how these terrific courses add into for our benefit. This brings me to our their price infinite), something previ- After carful and veiled inquiry during ber 1st. I hope to see you all there. the awful minors and majors that ously thought practically impossible. my teacher’s office hours, I realized we have. I mean i get why we have Continued on page 6 Page 6 The Randolph-Macon Cooter November 10th, 2017

Majors cont. Fantasy Football Interview Continued next major – the watch other people do real work major. This major would give us precision skills that enables us Advice is all about. And I don’t have a megaphone. to watch others do work that we know Me: That’s really great! So, how much Me: So, you just tell the people under we can probably do if we put in any ac- Start Sit money does the school put in to this you to do better? tual effort but choose not to. With this every year? Beanbolly: Yes. No. Wait… I don’t major we can provide new streets of Beanbolly: Oh, it’s a huge project. know. Uh, can you take that part out? success for our student to walk down. Aaron Rodgers, QB Marshawn Lynch, RB We get about a hundred thousand per Me: Uh, OK. So, anyway, in your I would also know because I have I was reading on Gossip I saw a video on MySpace and year. We have to spend a lot to replace opinion, what effect has this project worked 7 internships with 4 differ- the Magikarp costumes we keep los- had on the student body? Has it posi- ent fortune 50 companies in the past Magazine that Aaron’s was one Lynch was spraying a yellow ing. Plus, we have to make sure we tively or negatively affected grades? two years while only being a fresh- of the only people in the world jacket hive, so he is pretty have plenty of fixings and dip for Does it generate more revenue for the men. It is easy for me to know exactly to enjoy the presence of yellow mean. s’mores. Dip is important. It’s because college? How do you think it has af- what im talking about with this seri- of generous donations from alumni fected morale – both among the stu- ous experience (haha #MikeRotch- jackets, so definitely get him that we’re able to keep the admission dents and the faculty? Why do you forMacon2018) which I hope to on your team! Alvin Kamara, RB fee so low. think that High Adventure is a neces- bring to student body president soon. I know he got a lot of points, Me: Is $200 low for this sort of thing? sary project? Last but not least, we need DeAngelo Williams, RB but I heard he likes Hampton- Beanbolly: I don’t know. Ask the stu- Beanbolly: I’m very glad you asked to talk about how our professors dent affairs office. that. That really gets down to the root treat us. I cannot comprehend how This should be obvious, his jer- City College, so he is a no go Me: Are they in charge of this? of the issue, and I have something very and why they expect us to show up sey is black and yellow… like a for our team! Beanbolly: Probably. important to say about High Adven- to classes sober all the time, and how yellow jacket!! Pick him up to Me: OK. So, what part of these pro- ture and why it’s one of the absolutely my excuses for getting out of class be- have a player with a jersey that ceedings are you responsible for? most important undertakings at this cause im too hungover, or too tired, or Mitchell Trubisky, QB Beanbolly: I direct them. school. You see, High Adventure has crying too much in the corner of my is similar to ours! He is a part of the Bears, and Me: OK. How? been… dark room, or not feeling like it today Bears kill yellow jackets. Un- Beanbolly: By being director? (Here, a passing train blew its don’t make it through all of there thick Me: And what does that involve? whistle for about twenty seconds Tommylee Lewis, WR less you want to die, drop him skulls. it just baffles me to think that I I have a friend named Tommy Beanbolly: Directing. straight. It was so cool that I didn’t lis- am expected to go to a class im paying at ALL COSTS! Me: Which is? ten to what he was saying after that.) for that often – especially when i need and a friend named Lewis, so I (Here the professor was silent for So, all in all, we learned that High to take a day off for my upset tummy. like this guy. a moment) Adventure is a really cool thing, and Hopefully all of this will Beanbolly: You know, I’m like that that the director of it is really cool and change when I become president, guy in movies who sits in a camp important. So, I hope to see you all at but until then – Mike Rotch giv- chair with a megaphone and yells at the next High Adventure! ing all ya’ll the itch for a better everyone to work harder – except with life. Until next time in the Macon High Adventure rather than movies. Newspaper, stay breezy Maconians. Write for us, please! No qualifications necessary - we will run literally anything. Please help, I’m about to lose my job and things are getting desperate over here. The Randolph-Macon Cooter November 10th, 2017 The Hampden-Sydney Tiger Page 7 SPORTS The Game: ODAC Soccer Season Wrap-Up Championship on the Line

ference. They play loose defense, giv- Wesleyan outshot the Tigers 18-8, but players lead the team with four assists. Garrett Barton III ‘21 ing up an average of 235 yards passing the match went into overtime after a It really was a group effort this sea- Stewart Thames IV ’19 Staff Writer per game to opponents this season. scoreless regulation. Early in the over- son, but I am going to give this award Staff Writer Their lackluster defense is accom- time, the Tigers earned a penalty, and to senior centerback Thomas Car- This Saturday, Hampden-Sydney panied, however, by a potent offense JP Reategui coolly slotted the golden swell. He is one of only two players will close out their football regu- that puts up some gaudy statistics. goal penalty to the keeper’s bottom on the team who started all eighteen lar season on the road against hated They average a whopping 37 points The Tigers wrapped up their season right before celebrating in front of the matches this season, and he captained rival Randolph-Macon. The an- per game, the highest amongst all on October 28th with a gut-wrenching heartbroken Marlins fans. Go watch a stifling defense, mostly made up of nual bout with Macon is the most ODAC teams. Macon relies heavily 2-1 loss to Randolph-Macon in the the video on the HSC Soccer Twit- sophomores, which spent large por- important game on the schedule on their running game, and their of- first round of the ODAC playoffs. The ter account. The celebration is epic. tions of matches absorbing pressure. every year. This year, however, it fensive success this year is largely due Tigers finished the season with a 10- Disappointment Five Players for the Future carries even bigger stakes, as the to the successes of their workhorse 7-1 record and a fifth place finish in Before the ODAC tournament, I JP Reategui: The junior midfielder Tigers must win in order to con- running back, junior Tre Frederick. the ODAC regular season standings. was going to mark the four-goal drub- the team with 5 goals this season, but tend for the ODAC championship. In eight games, Frederick has rushed It was a solid first year for head coach bing Roanoke put on this team as the only started for 5 matches. Coach Hampden-Sydney is currently for over a thousand yards, averaging Tommy DiNuzzo who tied the record low point on the season. But, I am go- DiNuzzo seems to have preferred him in the climax of a remarkable come- 148 yards per game and picking up for most wins in a coach’s first year and ing to cheat here and say it was the in a super-sub role this season. Reat- back year, going 4-1 against confer- a team-high eleven touchdowns. In guided the Tigers to their first ODAC 1-0 loss to Washington and Lee in the egui has that “it” factor, so let’s hope ence opponents compared to a 3-4 last weekend’s game against Guilford, tournament appearance since 2014. final match of the regular season and coach DiNuzzo finds a way to get Reat- record last year. That 4-1 record places Frederick was handed the ball thirty Formation and Playing Style the subsequent 2-1 loss to Randolph- egui on the pitch more next season. H-SC beside Washington and Lee at times and accrued 199 yards, leading For the most part, the Tigers Macon in the first round of the ODAC Gray Sutter: The freshman goal- the top of the conference standings. the Jackets to a sixteen-point victory. played in a 4-3-3 or 4-2-3-1, and tournament. Heading into the match keeper split playing time with three W&L is considered the frontrunner Hampden-Sydney is second in the maybe even a 4-1-4-1 every now and against Washington and Lee, the Ti- other keepers this season, but he led because of their tie-breaking victory conference in rushing yards allowed then. Regardless of the formation, this gers had already booked a spot in the the other keepers in minutes played, over the Tigers. W&L controls their per game, but that won’t stop Ran- team came out played the same way ODAC tournament, but they had the GAA, saves, wins, and shutouts. He own destiny, as a win on the road dolph-Macon from continuing their just about every game, with four men chance to guarantee themselves a first is due at least one good save every against Shenandoah this weekend use of the run game. In order for the sitting deep in the back, a deep lying round home match with a home win match. Look for him to be one of the will clinch them the title; however, if Tigers to win, they have to control the defensive mid to sweep and do the against Washington and Lee. Instead, best in the conference in three years. they lose, H-SC can win their 10th ground game. They cannot afford for dirty work in front of the backline, and the Tigers gave up an early penalty Eli Strong: The sophomore cen- ODAC championship outright with the Yellow Jackets to extend drives and a lone forward up top to win clearanc- midway through the first half and terback started all eighteen matches a victory over Randolph-Macon. wear down the defense by running the es and try to get the team started on Washington and Lee were content to on the backline with Carswell, and The Yellow Jackets failed to re- football, and must stop Frederick from the counter. There were multiple in- sit back and force the lethargic Tigers he was even able to contribute with peat as ODAC champions this year, running wild as he has done all season. stance this season when this team was attack to create a goal. The Tigers lost three goals this season. With Car- but they have played some impressive If H-SC gets the better of their content to defend for long stretches the match 1-0 and then had to go to swell graduating, Strong will be ex- football and are far from being con- arch nemesis, all eyes will quickly turn with no intent on possessing the ball. Randolph-Macon as a #5 seed in the pected to lead the defense next season. sidered an easy opponent. R-MC is to Shenandoah as they take Washing- Still, this team knew its identity and ODAC tournament. The Tigers came Jacob Mann: The sophomore for- 6-3 overall, and 3-2 within the con- ton and Lee in the decisive matchup. they defended effectively enough to out hot against Randolph-Macon and ward finished tied for first on the team do some real damage on the counter. a Landon Moss goal late in the first in points with four goals and four as- The Tigers were not the most cre- half gave the Tigers an early advan- sists to his name this season. He was ative team in the attacking third, but tage; however, the Tigers came out a valuable outlet up top with his hold they were gritty and tough enough in the second half content to sit back up play when the defense needed to to eke out the necessary results. and let Macon break them down. Ma- relieve pressure by clearing the ball. Best Moment con scored an equalizer with about PJ Lebel: The freshman mid- Heading to Virginia Wesleyan on 15 minutes left, and then, spurred fielder played in all eighteen matches October 28th, the Tigers had a 3-3 re- on by their home crowd, found the this season and contributed to the cord in ODAC play and had lost three game-winner in the 84th minute. The scoresheet with two goals and an as- of their last four conference matches. shocked Tigers were unable to find a sist on the season. He was a solid They badly needed a conference win on goal in the final minutes and they fin- role player on this young team, and the road if they wanted to stay in con- ished their season with a heartbreak- his offseason work will go a long way tention for the ODAC tournament. ing away defeat against their rivals. in determining how big of a role he It was a physical match between the Team MVP: I honestly had no will play in DiNuzzo’s 2018 squad. Tigers and Marlins with both teams clue who to put here. The leading goal committing 11 fouls each. Virginia Photo: hscathletics.com scorer only had five goals and a few Page 8 The Hampden-Sydney Tiger November 10th, 2017

Thoreau Album Review: Argus Software is a proud Continued sponsor of ARGUS to such a reform might be the stu- The Space Between dents themselves. Among the many self-described outdoorsmen at this Majid Jordan Financial Analysis courses at campus (who surely compose a majority of students), there are many who are at best apathetic towards Hampden-Sydney College. nature. Students wearing Patagonia If you are unfamiliar with who year, amongst the countless num- pullovers with fishing poles in the the duo Majid Jordan are, chances ber of albums that I have listened back of their trucks will routinely are you have already heard their mu- to. With a beat that reminisces of throw trash out their windows. Those sic. Majid Jordan consists of Majid 90’s R&B and lyrics that tug at the who love hunting often are the first Al Maskati and Jordan Ullman, and emotions, “Gave Your Love Away” to disregard environmental protec- together they are signed to Drake’s is an incredibly well made track that tions that are designed to make sure OVO Sound. One of Drake’s big- starts the album off great. The next that their children can enjoy the gest hits, Hold on We’re Going two songs, “OG Heartthrob” and same sports they do. It seems like we Home, has Majid Jordan featured “Body Talk,” are both deep, dance burn what we want, consume what on the track, which is the first time infused R&B tracks that cannot be we will, and leave the trash to some- I had heard of the duo. Also, the missed. Solid R&B, amazing pro- one else. This sort of behavior is ir- two have released only two studio duction, and meaningful lyrics con- responsible and disrespectful to our albums. The first being a self-titled tinue to fill the rest of the album, planet, our children, and ourselves. album, released in February 2016, making it solid from front to back. Regardless of what one thinks about and the second, The Space Between, The Space Between is one of the global warming, many of the initia- releasing last week, on October 26. most surprising albums that I have tives that began with the intent of The Space Between blew me listened to this year. Previously, I stopping that issue also have an im- away. The duo creates R&B with had never listened to a Majid Jordan mensely positive impact on environ- passion and deep emotion laced album and I had no expectations of mental cleanliness, which helps to in between each track. The album what their previous music sounded make plants, animals, and humans starts with an aesthetic introduc- like, besides a few features on Drake’s lead healthier and more attractive tion that creates the perception of a singles. However, this album is cer- lives. Surely an investment which strange atmosphere around the lis- tainly worth a listen and one of the promises to reduce waste is worth an tener. Then the second track begins, best that has been released this year. increase in waste management costs. “Gave Your Love Away.” This song Brad Murawski ’19 It is not the intention of this is one of the best I have heard this Staff Writer article to disparage active efforts to combat and control pollution. Clubs like the Fly Fishing Club will clean up rivers before fishing them, and there are efforts like “The Big Event” that encourage students and frater- Join our staff! nity members to go out and pick up some of innumerable pieces of trash that seem to line the roads of Farm- Writers, photographers, cartoonists and critics are all welcome to ville. Yet, it seems like the number of students that engage in these activities is pitifully small when compared join the Tiger family. If interested, shoot us an email at newspa- to those who profess their love for all things outdoors. At a school with an [email protected]. No application or experience necessary. endowment coming to over $125,000 per student, it is a disgrace to not be able to afford a single recycling can which is visible while walking across campus, and it is a disgrace that we, The Hampden-Sydney Tiger as students, allow this to happen.