David Baldacci's Hour Game Translation and Analysis
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MASARYK UNIVERSITY Faculty of Education Department of English Language and Literature David Baldacci’s Hour Game Translation and Analysis Bachelor´s Thesis Jiřina Kapcárová Supervisor: Mgr. Martin Adam, Ph.D. Brno 2012 Declaration Hereby I proclaim that this bachelor thesis was done by my own and I used only the materials that are listed in the bibliography. I agree with storing of this work in the library of the Faculty of Education at the Masaryk University Brno and making it accessible for study purposes. In Brno, 2012 …………………………………………… Jiřina Kapcárová Abstract David Baldacci’s Hour Game: Translation and Analysis The bachelor thesis concerns with the English-Czech translation and the mistranslations which can occur. The work consists of two main parts. The practical part contains four chosen chapters of the novel Hour Game by David Baldacci and the Czech translation. The next part of this thesis deals with comparing of this translation and the translation of Ivan Brož, which has been branded as the worst translation of the year 2006 by Obec překladatelů. The goal is to find out whether the criticism of the translation of this particular book is in place and to evaluate the translation of Ivan Brož from the readers’ point of view. Anotace David Baldacci: Hour Game – překlad a analýza Tato bakalářská práce se zabývá anglicko-českým překladem a nepřesnostmi, které se v překladu mohou vyskytnout. Práce sestává ze dvou částí. Praktická část obsahuje čtyři vybrané kapitoly z novely Hour Game od Davida Baldacciho a jejich český překlad. Druhá část práce srovnává český překlad z předchozí kapitoly s překladem pana Ivana Brože, který byl ohodnocen Obcí překladatelů jako nejhorší překlad roku 2006. Cílem práce je zjistit zda je kritika překladu této knihy na místě a ohodnotit překlad pana Ivana Brože z pozice čtenáře. Key words David Baldacci, Ivan Brož, translation, analysis, semantic translation, communicative translation, expression, substitution, transcription, equivalent Klíčová slova David Baldacci, Ivan Brož, překlad, analýza, doslovný překlad, volný překlad, výraz, nahrazení, transkripce, ekvivalent Acknowledgement I would like to thank my supervisor, Mgr. Martin Adam, Ph.D., for his support and very moti- vating guidance. His sense of humour and kind but objective critique made me enjoy writing this thesis. Content 1. Introduction .....................................................................................................................1 2. About the author and the book .........................................................................................2 2.1 David Baldacci ............................................................................................................2 2.2 The book Hour Game..................................................................................................2 3. Practical part - Translation ...............................................................................................4 4. Theoretical part - Analyses ............................................................................................ 42 4.1 Part one .................................................................................................................. 42 4.1.1 Translation of the Title ........................................................................................ 42 4.1.2 Importance of readers' concretization .................................................................. 43 4.1.3 Metaphor, metaphorical meaning ........................................................................ 44 4.1.4 First name basis .................................................................................................. 44 4.1.5 Knowing the background .................................................................................... 46 4.1.6 Translation of proper nouns................................................................................. 47 4.1.7 Semi-direct speech .............................................................................................. 48 4.1.8 Translating of vulgarisms and attitudinal sentence modifiers ............................... 49 4.1.9 Omitting of whole phrases .................................................................................. 50 4.1.10 Translation of interjections .................................................................................. 51 4.2 Part two .................................................................................................................. 51 4.2.1 Keeping the English structure ............................................................................. 52 4.2.2 Communicative and Semantic translation ............................................................ 53 4.2.3 Misunderstanding of the original ......................................................................... 59 4.2.4 Illustrating the atmosphere .................................................................................. 60 4.2.5 Inaccuracy .......................................................................................................... 60 4.2.6 Definite and Indefinite article .............................................................................. 62 4.2.7 Mistranslation caused by the original text ........................................................... 62 4.2.8 Collocations with fixed meaning, phrasal expressions ......................................... 64 4.2.9 Idioms................................................................................................................. 65 4.2.10 Expressions and collocations which sound odd in Czech ..................................... 65 4.2.11 Quotation from another work .............................................................................. 67 4.2.12 Understanding the text with regard to the Czech word order ............................... 67 4.2.13 The choice of words ............................................................................................ 67 5. Conclusion .................................................................................................................... 69 Bibliography......................................................................................................................... 71 1. Introduction The Czech translation of the book Hour Game, originally written by David Baldacci, has been branded by Obec překladatelů as the worst translation of the year 2006. It has been translated by Ivan Brož, edited by Miroslav Žák and published by Mladá fronta. I chose this book for two reasons. The first one was the topic and the great reviews the original book gained. Although there are many detective stories and thrillers nowadays, it is not easy to find a good one to read. I have to say I was not disappointed. The second reason was that the translation of Ivan Brož has been branded as the worst of the year 2006. I mean no irreverence towards Ivan Brož, who is well respected publicist and author of political and historical non-fiction literature. Translating a book of 700 pages in limited time is everything but an easy task. I chose this book to decide for myself about the quality of the published translation. In the practical part I focused on the reading and translation of four chapters from the book. These chapters were chosen randomly. They are from the first quarter of the book where the actual story begins, but the reader does not lack any information from the previous text. The book itself is a thriller and readers can expect easy comprehensible structures and no specialized vocabulary. The author does not use complicated complex, compound or multiple sentences. That would dispel all the tension and the readers would be bored. The majority of the story is told by dialogues. This is the reason why I find it easy to understand the plot without any difficulties for any upper-intermediate reader. The book is the second part of the five volume series about detectives Maxwell and King and that is why it is important to get a bit familiar with the preceding book – Split Second. The stories are not really connected, but the translator must be aware of the relationships concerning the main characters and adapt the Czech text according to that. 1 2. About the author and the book This section gives a brief insight into the life and work of David Baldacci and into the features of the book which are important for the process of translation. 2.1 David Baldacci David Baldacci is a 52 years old American novelist, author of many best sellers, screenwriter and a former lawyer. He wrote over twenty novels and 15 of them became a number one best seller. His works are very popular all around the world and have been translated into 45 languages. We can buy his books in over 100 countries. His first novel Absolute Power was made into a film in 1997, which was just one year after it had been published. Many magazines and newspapers brought some of his works to millions of people. He contributes to the Parade Magazine. Many TV shows invited him as a guest, thus not just his work but also his face became world-wide known. (n.d., 2011) 2.2 The book Hour Game Hour Game describes an adventure of two detectives – Michelle Maxwell and Sean King – who were already introduced to the readers in Baldacci's previous book Split Second. On 700 pages Baldacci gives us a thrilling story situated into a small town called Wrightsburg. A copycat killer is terrorizing this small town and no one is safe. Retelling the plot would be complicated