COLUMNS 3 posed to be pumping up a tyre on his The Bradys were so 70s it hurt. They bike became an intense experience started sedately enough with jeans where he attempted to form a and sneakers, but quickly took on the relationship with each spoke on the accoutrements of the decade which wheel. He revealed what all Brady put the flair into flares. The girls had fans suspected—he was infatuated long straight hair parted down the with Maureen McCormick (who middle, and favoured bell-bottoms played Marcia), Peter and Jan had a and ponchos. The boys wore shirts romantic liaison, and Cindy and with patterns so wild and bright that Bobby actually used to make out in' you could only look at them directly Tiger's doghouse! In the book's most with the aid of sunglasses. And the talked-about section he recounts collars were so wide that the actors details of a date with his screen could have Jumped off cliffs and mother, Florence Henderson. Unfor­ glided safely to the bottom. PROFILE tunately, this Oedipal turn of events never emerged in a Brady script. But perhaps most importantly, the Then Robert Reed (who played dad, message that was rammed home The Brady Bunch Mike Brady) died of an AIDS-related week after week was that the family, illness and the tabloids and glossies as long as it stuck together, could At a Sydney theatre opening night surmount any problem. With a little in September, a manager of a com­ understanding and a whole lot of puter software company was brotherly/sisterly love, no one had mobbed by the audience and to feel left out or persecuted. In the hassled for photos and autographs. 90s, when children from broken He wasn't even in the play, yet he homes are par for the course, this was confined to the theatre for al­ funny little TV world of domestic most an hour after the performance harmony with occasional minor, by the adoring hordes. He wore a non-threatening upheavals looks quite unhip jacket and went by the like a comforting fairytale. unassuming name of Chris Knight. But Chris Knight has a dim, dark You could always tell when things secret. He was Peter Brady. got incredibly serious on The Brady Bunch; Mike would call a family In 1969 the lovely lady with three meeting! He would lay down the law lovely girls and the man who was of the land, explain things reasonab­ busy with three boys of his own ly, and Carol would nod sympatheti­ decided that they had much more cally like a good wife. This seemed to than a hunch, and decided to Join went into overdrive. By this stage a be her major role on the show, as she clans. The Brady Bunch spent the next theatre troupe had been having suc­ didn't have a Job and Alice the five years setting up pressing family cess in the States with The Real Live housekeeper handled most of the problems (Jan feels neglected as mid­ Brady Bunch, which involved actors chores. dle child; Greg wants to move into a re-enacting episodes word-for-word room of his own) which could all be on stage, with extra innuendo and Australia didn't get the series until solved within 30 minutes, including exaggerated character tics. 1974, but it was repeated in its en­ commercials. The show was canned tirety five times up until 1987. As a in 1974 and went on to syndication One reason for this Bradymania is result everyone from teenagers to re-run heaven. The cast seemed des­ surely our current fascination with thirtysomethings has grown up with tined for the 'Where Are They Now?' all things 70s. It started with the the Bradys. At the premiere of The file, only kept alive in the memories music. The robotic beats, repetitive Real Live Brady Bunch they all lined of fanatics who knew the name of melodies and strobe lights of House up to get Chris Knight's autograph, Cindy's doll, what Alice's sister was music at warehouse parties and in and every one of them knew his char­ called, and Marcia's bra size. That all nightclubs sparked a disco revival. acter's most famous line from the changed this year. Hand-in-hand with that came an as­ show. For those who are unaware of similation of 70s fashion. The gaudy those enigmatic words which mean Barry Williams (who played Greg) Jewellery, flared pants, patterned so much to so many, they are as fol­ kicked things off with his book, vests and chunky platform shoes lows: "pork chops and apple sauce". Growing Up Brady, which regaled us were snapped up from city op-shops with tales of mischief—like the time and adapted to new designs. 'Dag BARRY DIVOLA writes for Who he was stoned on marijuana on the nights' and 70s theme parties were magazine, and has a worrying obsession set; a scene in which he was sup­ suddenly en vogue. with American television. ALR; OCTOBER 1992.