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EMPATHY EDUCATION Why the Other Side of the Report Card Counts by Michele Borba, Ed.D

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EMPATHY EDUCATION Why the Other Side of the Report Card Counts by Michele Borba, Ed.D EMPATHY EDUCATION Why the Other Side of the Report Card Counts By Michele Borba, Ed.D. micheleborba.com “Empathy is seeing with the eyes of another. Listening with the ears of another and feeling with the heart of another.” Empathy Is Teachable and Comprised of 3 Distinct Types “Empathy ABCs” Affective: Feeling what another person feels; Behavioral: Sensing what someone needs and responding compassionately; Cognitive: understanding another’s perspective or values but -not necessarily agreeing with them. And it lies on a spectrum from low to high. Empathy Education Starts with Understanding the Empathy Advantage Empathy is integral to education, mental health, promoting the moral virtues of kindness, compassion, justice, fairness, caring, it increases resilience, civic engagement, helps students become contributing citizens and creates more caring, inclusive, safe, trusting Empathy Staff Resources learning climates. And it reduces aggression, bullying, racism, violence, and hate. UnSelfie, Michele Borba The Road to Character, Brooks 7 Principles of Effective Empathy Education The Altruistic Personality, Oliner 1. Ongoing: Not a one-time lesson but a continual focus The Path to Purpose; Damon Generation Me, Twenge 2. Woven-in: Integrated into content, not tacked on. iGen, Jean Twenge 3. Meaningful: Real & authentic so it’s touches heart & mind. The Trophy Kids Grow Up, Alsop 4. Internalized: Goal is adopting empathy competencies as habits. Shadow a Student Challenge 5. Student-Centered: Child’s needs, not curriculum, drives lessons. College of the Overwhelmed, 6. Relationships: Empathy breeds in a culture of respect & caring. Kadison 7. Empathic Leadership: Modeling, expected and core to leader’s The Nature of Prejudice, Allport vision, purpose, style and interactions. Nobody Left to Hate, Aronson The Science of Evil, Baron-Cohen Points to Help Staff Recognize that Empathy Matters Savage Spawn, Kellerman Why They Kill, Rhodes “The culture and parenting styles are changing and do not support empathy.” Aggression Replacement “Yes, we can because empathy is teachable, and comprised of nine competencies.” Therapy, Arnold Goldstein “The empathy demise is happening to OUR students, too!” Restorative Justice in Chicago “Students are hurting, afraid, and can’t learn if they don’t feel safe.” Public Schools “We can think big, but we’ll start with small steps and keep going forward.” Made to Stick, Health “Empathy education is woven in or integrated into lessons and not another program.” A Long Walk to Water, Parks “Empathy has research-driven data to support the outcomes we seek for our students.” The Empathetic Civilization, “Empathy aligns with our 5Ps: principles, procedures, practices, policies, people.” Rufkin End Peer Cruelty, Build Empathy, “It’s the best antidote to aggression, bullying and hate.” “The most memorable teachers and lessons are empathy driven.” “It prepares students for the 21st century, 4th industrial revolution, and global world.” “It helps kids develop empathetic mindsets so they see themselves as caring and want to make a positive difference on the world.” “It creates the kind of people we hope and want our students to become.” “It’s the right thing to do and a moral imperative that we help our students reach their full potential as just, caring, contributing citizens. If we don’t cultivate their empathetic capabilities then who will?” BRAVE STAFF CHATS: What behaviors are students catching from us? How can we model empathy to our students? What sort of people do we want our students to become?” What’s our first step to success? How will we know when we are making an impact? ©2018 Michele Borba, Ed.D. Contact Dr. Borba for speaking at MicheleBorba.com. Follow her on Twitter @micheleborba 1 THE EDUCATIONAL LEADER’S ROLE IN EMPATHY EDUCATION 9 Empathy Competencies 2 Crucial Questions an Educational Leader Should Ask 1. Which empathy competencies are we already addressing? 1.Emotional Literacy, so Educational leaders may fail to already existing practices and programs that support children can recognize and empathy such as social-emotional learning, service learning, character education, understanding the feelings mindfulness, debate, theatre, cooperative learning, conflict resolution, and restorative justice. Consider what you already have in place, align those practices with the nine and needs of themselves competencies and then list which ones missing in teacher training or implementation. and others. 2. Which competencies might benefit our students? 2.Moral Identity so Check behavior referrals, listen to staff and counselors and hear their concerns, ask children will adopt caring parents what worries them about their children, but also hold student focus groups. Ask values that guide their older students which habits do they need to succeed in school and life. Choose skills that integrity and activate your students and culture needs. Empathy education is not a cookie-cutter approach. empathy to help others. 3.Perspective Taking so 6 Quick Ways Educational Leaders Can Gauge Empathy Education children can step into 1. Walk Your Halls. Are you seeing laughter, conversation, smiles and inclusion? Empathy others’ shoes to under- breeds in caring cultures. stand other people’s 2. Do a School Map. Each student marks hot spots “school safety concerns or where feelings, thoughts, and bullying, aggression happen” and cold spots: places you feel safe or would go to if there views. is a problem.” How many hot spots do you have? Boost adult supervision. 4.Moral Imagination so 3. Discover Safety Nets. Each student writes names of peer and/or adult they would go to if children can use literature, a problem on a 3x5 card; can be done anonymously. Empathy needs trust and caring. films and emotionally Make sure every student has support. charged images as a source 4. Lunch Bunch Focus Groups. Periodically dine with students can ask them their peers’ of inspiration to feel with perceptions about the school. “What suggestions could we do to make our school better, others. safer, more caring?” “What do we stand for in this school?” 5.Self-Regulation to help 5. Conduct Student Surveys. One Question: Students feel included-not ostracized or children learn to manage marginalized. (Test – look in cafeteria, playgrounds) strong emotions and 6. Ask 1 Question. “Who will you play with at recess?” or “Who will you sit with at lunch?” reduce personal distress so Now check to see which students are not on anyone’s list. What will you do to help those they can help others. students connect and fit it? 6.Practice Kindness to increase children’s Why Empathy Education Is Crucial [See UnSelfie Introduction]. concerns about the welfare U.S. teens are now 40% lower in empathy than three decades ago (Konrath, 2012). and feelings of others. As empathy has dipped, narcissism rates increased 58% (Konrath, 2012). 7.Collaboration to help Empathy reduces aggression and boosts prosocial behaviors (Einsenberg, 2010) and may be children work with others our best antidote to bullying and racism (Santos, 2011). to achieve shared goals for Empathetic students display more classroom engagement, higher academic achievement the benefit of all. and better communication skills (Jones 2014). 8.Moral Courage to Empathy is the foundation of a safe, caring, inclusive learning climate (ASCD). embolden children to Empathy boosts employability; named top for Global Economic Forum.: Forbes urges speak out, step in and help companies to adopt empathy & perspective-taking principles; Harvard Business Review says it is of the “essential ingredients for leadership success and excellent performance. others. 9.Altruistic Leadership Abilities to motivate kids to Courageous Conversations to Start Empathy Education Implementation make a difference for How can we build empathy amongst one-another within our building or department? (Stressed adults who need empathy have a hard time nurturing empathy for kids). others, no matter how Change starts with WHY. Implementation is the HOW. Let’s not reinvent the wheel. What small it may be. are existing strategies, procedures, policies that support empathy building. List them. © 2016 Michele Borba Unselfie: Why Empathetic What existing policies, procedures, practice counter empathy building (for instance: shame- Kids Succeed in Our All- based discipline). Is there a way to implement more restorative practices? About-Me World. What are some of the best teaching practices or workplace habits we can take on this year that would increase achievement/productivity AND empathy? 9 ©2018 Michele Borba, Ed.D. Contact Dr. Borba for speaking at MicheleBorba.com. Follow her on Twitter @micheleborba 2 WHAT EMPATHY EDUCATION LOOKS LIKE There is no one “right” approach to Empathy Education nor is it a cookie-cutter concept in which you borrow empathy strategies from another school to make it your own. Best approaches are always culture-driven and home-grown, but implementing proven empathy-building practices is always key. Here are things to look for that tell an educational leader that empathy is implemented based on the nine essential competencies of empathy from UnSelfie: Why Empathetic Kids Succeed in Our All-About-Me World EMPATHY COMPETENCY 1: Emotional Literacy Before students can empathize, they must be able to read emotions. Students able to recognize feelings are better adjusted emotionally, more popular, more outgoing, and more sensitive in general (Goleman, 1995). They also score higher academically
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