Section A NEW YORK STATE'S OLDEST LGBT PUBLICATION

DADT policy unfair, local soldier says By Susan Jordan Army Reserve Specialist Joe Soel, an Iraq veteran, may still be serving in the military when this article reaches print, but it won't be for long. Soel has requested a discharge due to what he sees as the Pentagon's discriminatory policy against LGBT military personnel. "Don't Ask Don't Tell" is currently being re-appraised by the Pentagon, as part of the repeal process initiated by the Obama administration. Mean­ while, however, gay and lesbian soldiers are still being booted out of the military, under what (bADT continues page 3) Light in the darkness: Day of Silence draws 202 youth By Susan Jordan tion. Representatives from Gayl flew through the air. Michael Two hundred and two youth Straight Alliances (GSAs) from Steck, a.k.a. Pandora Boxx, attended the Rochester Day of area schools performed a can­ spoke with the youth, much to Silence observance on April 16. dle lighting ceremony. The GSA their excitement, and the event Nationally, around 4,700 middle members were from School of ended with a dance, with music and high schools participated the Arts, School Without Walls provided by DJ Chuck Argento. this year, according to GLSEN Foundation, Greece Arcadia, Youth Services Director Jes­ (Gay Lesbian Straight Education Bloomfield, Gates Chili and sica Cohen said, "It's amazing Network). NW College Prep Home T utor­ when teenagers can be quiet The youth gathered in the ing. Students from Rush Henri­ for more than 30 seconds. The Apollo Room at the Auditorium etta and SOTA read poems GAGV Youth Center is usu­ Center to remember those whose As the last candle was lit, the ally loud on any given drop-in voices have been lost to homo­ silence was broken by loud cheer­ day, no matter if there are two Army Reservist Joe Soel phobic hatred and discrimina- ing and noisemakers, as confetti (light continues page 3)

Pride Agenda CRF plans local Linked by full equality. All across the country on Spring Dinner will action for Harvey Love: Walk at Saturday, Mar 22, those who take place May 22 Milk's birthday Marketplace Mall support equa rights and pro­ tections for LG BT Americans The Empire State Pride "On Oct. 11, 2009, more Equality ROC is planning a and their families will assemble Agenda's Spring Dinner will than 200,000 people marched couple of events the week of May to demand full equality. Equal­ take place on Saturday, May 22 on Washington D.C. in the 17 to honor Harvey Milk (his ity ROC is staging an equal­ at the Rochester Riverside Con­ National Equality March with birthday is May 22) and encour­ ity walk at Marketplace Mall vention Center. one single demand: Equal pro­ age members of the Rochester's for National Harvey Milk Day, State Senator Eric Adams tection in all matters governed LGBT community to take a meeting at the Food Court at will give the keynote address. by civil law in all 50 states. more active role in securing their (Walk continues page 7) The Pride Agenda's Community "On May 22, 2010 - the Service Award will be presented anniversary of Harvey Milk's to Gay Alliance Board member birthday - we will take action Emily Jones, and Special Recog­ again to DEMAND full equal­ nition will go to Mayor Robert ity for all LGBT people," says ]. Duffy. Equality Across America. Mark Valley of "Human Tar­ The International Day get" will be emcee. The evening Against Homophobia, May 17, will start with a reception at 5:45 kicks off a week of local actions p.m. Dinner and the program and on Harvey Milk's birth­ begin at 7 p.m. day, May 22, Equality Across To purchase tickets, sponsor­ America (EAA) calls on activ­ ships or journal advertisements, ists to converge in each of the 50 or for more information, visit states for the Harvey Milk Day www.prideagenda.org or call Action. 212-627-0305. Rochester's Civil Rights The Afterparty will be at Front, organizers of the Feb­ Tilt. • (CRF continues page 7)

The Gay Alliance appreciates the continuing ., .... partnership of businesses within our community Ko ak Excellus ~ M!!rrlll Lynch who support our mission and vision. Inside CORNING Section A -f. e lIIoIIILlWiace S[tylClU I Newsfronts ...... 4 Gold Eastman Kodak Company; Excellus, Mass Mutual e NIXON PI'ASDIJY U.F Financial Group; Merrill Lynch; Met Life, Nixon Peabody, LLP ~Th 1), ... Interview: Joe Tarver ...... 6 MONRO ·O J\N Gay men: a call to action ...... 14 Silver Ace Mailing Services; Bausch & Lomb Inc.; ~ITT ORttPrifAL Making The Scene ...... 18 Corning Incorporated; Harter Secrest & Emory LLP; Heveron & Heveron CPAs; ITT Corporation; Monroe Plan for Section B Medical Care; Sage Advisors of Sage Rutty; S1. John Fisher Entertainment: Lipstick Massacre .-- ~Bank&TrUSl at Geva ...... 1 College; Tim Tompkins Enterprises; Xerox Capital Services Columnists ...... 15 Bronze Canandaigua National Bank; Empire State College; EMPIRlSTATE. GAGV News: Spiritual abuse ... 12 GALAXE Pride at Work; Kittleberger Florist & Gifts; Open Arms COLLEGE Groups: Unmasking BOSM : Metropolitan Community Church; Third Presbyterian Church; Episode 2 ...... 115 Calendar ...... 18 Wegmans Food Markets; The Woolbright Group - Classifieds ...... 18 W8!Clrnt:ln5 Pride Thomson Reuters Ongoing Calendar ...... 19 2 A THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010 AY ALLIANCE EE VALLEY

The Empty Closet is published by the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500 Rochester, New York 14605 © 2010, All rights reserved.

Editor·in·Chief: Susan Jordan FROM THE FROM THE Staff Reporters: Ove Overmyer, Laura McSpadden Empty Closet Editor Executive Director Graphic Design: Jim Anderson

Advertising policy: SUSAN JORDAN SUE COWELL The Empty Closet does not print advertise­ ments that contain nude drawings or pho­ not really human don't deserve parent. The Gay Alliance has tographs, nor does it print advertising that human rights. All oppressors also partnered with Pride and states that the person pictured in the ad is for sale, or that you will "get" that particular everywhere try to justify their Joy Families based in Bingham­ person if you patronize the establishment crimes by de-humanizing their ton to provide family oriented advertised. Advertisements that are explicitly victims as "vermin," "a bacil­ programming and activities in racist, sexist, ageist, ableist or homophobic will be refused: advertisements from organi­ lus" or "animals". The Right's our area. Look for family ori­ zations that are sexist, racist, ageist, ableist ugly rhetoric says that gays are ented Pride events this year in or anti-gay will also be refused. All politi­ cal advertisements must contain information "bestial" and equates homeless addition to the anchor events of about who placed them and a method of people with stray animals that the Parade, Festival and Picnic. contact. Additionally, The Empty Closet does "will breed" if fed (so let them Our partnership with Rain­ not print negative or "attack" advertisements, whether they relate to a product or politics starve). Legal marriage affirms bow SAGE of the Genesee Val­ and no matter in whose interest the ad is our humanity and protects our ley continues to grow. We hosted being produced. A negative advertisement a meeting with members of is defined as one that focuses upon a rival human and civil rights. product, or in the political area, a rival elec­ To 19bt people who are not SAGE leadership, Gay Alliance tion candidate or party, in order to point out staff and Kindred Care. Kindred supposed flaws and to persuade the pub­ interested in marrying, howev­ lic not to buy it (or vote for him or her). The er, marriage equality may seem Care is a locally owned company Empty Closet maintains, within legal bound­ like imitation of an oppressive providing home health care ser­ aries, neutrality regarding products, political vices to the LG BT community. candidates and parties. However, "attack" straight institution. ads that fail to provide undisputable evidence Marriage equality: To many heterosexuals, mar­ The Gay Alliance In April Scott Fearing, Pro­ that the information in the ad is true do not a threat to straight riage is respected and also seen Community Center gram Director at the Gay Alli­ further in any way the objectives and poli­ ance, and Sherlea Dony, Toni cies of the Gay Alliance or The Empty Closet, families? as an institution that gays can and Beyond including the primary tenet that The Empty be part of. Perri and Brian Hurlburt from Closet's purpose is to inform the Rochester the Board of Rainbow Sage gay community and to provide an impartial On what grounds do homo­ But to conservative extrem­ I continue to be amazed at forum for ideas. phobes base their claim that our ists, "marriage" equals "male the number of LG BT organi­ attended a "train the trainer" in Syracuse on Senior Issues Cul­ Submissions: legal marriages and happy fami­ contro!," which is seen as "what zations in our community. In For publication, submit news items, ads, lies are a "threat" to heterosexual God wants". They believe males addition to increasing our part­ tural Competency. The LGBT photos, letters, stories, poetry, ads, pho­ tographs or art by mail or in person to The marriages and families? It just are superior to females, females nerships with LGBT organiza­ Health and Human Servic­ es Network Senior Committee Empty Closet office by the 15th of the month. doesn't make sense. It's a slo­ are property, and Patriarchy - tions, we have also expanded our Design services for non-camera ready ads gan chanted by bigots with an absolute control of society by community spaces. developed the curriculum. I also are available for a fee. (www.emptycloset@ had the pleasure to speak with gagv.us) extremist political agenda. But upper class males - is a given. No Over the past year, the Gay the SAGE membership about Publication Information: what does it really mean? Patriarch Left Behind; no frame Alliance has expanded its num­ all the programs the Gay Alli­ The Empty Closet is published 11 times a Like a lot of irrational hate­ of reference except totalitarian ber of partnerships with other year (December and January combined) by ance has and ways to increase propaganda, it speaks to the male power. If heterosexual men organizations. In the fall of 2009 The Empty Closet Press for the Gay Alliance our partnership to better pro­ of the Genesee Valley, Inc. Approximately emotions on a subconscious level. lose control of the central institu­ we added a large community vide for our community as we 5000 copies of each issue are distributed If you define traditional mar­ tion of male-female relationships room and the library, both of during the first week of the month, some by all age. Together we will increase mail in a plain sealed envelope. The pub­ riage as a institution that main­ - if women and "woman-like" which are on the first floor of our capacity to provide Cul­ lication of the name or photograph of any person or organization in articles is not an tains heterosexual male control males (such is the homophobic the Auditorium Center. We con­ tural Competency Training to of society, then for two women stereotype) gain equal power in tinue to make available the Nop­ indication of the sexual or affectional orien­ agencies serving the elder LGBT tation of that person or the members of that or two men to be legally wed society - Patriarchy is doomed per Conference room for smaller community. organization. For further information, please might be seen as a threat - not and the sky will fall. meetings. The Youth Center is a write to The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main St., To recoin the old phrase Rochester NY. 14605, call (585) 244-9030 to heterosexual marriages and Hardly. In reality, the ethi­ large special location for larger about familiarity breeding con­ or e-mail [email protected]. families - but to male supremacy cal choice is to transform unjust events and meetings. The Empty Closet is the official publi­ tempt- in the case of the Gay cation of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee itself Maybe that's what really institutions; end hatred, vio­ We are also hosting In­ Alliance and Rainbow SAGE, Valley, Inc., as stated in the bylaws of that scares the right. That's the real lence and discrimination against Queery Classes and information Familiarity breeds cooperation, organization. Its purpose is to inform the bat in their belfries. women, transgender people and on classes, dates and times are Rochester gay community about local and understanding, respect and col­ national gay-related news and events: to The word "marriage" means gay and bi men, and create an available on our web site at gay­ laboration. It helps to create a provide a forum for ideas and creative work different things to different peo­ egalitarian society that is fair to alliance.org. from the local gay community: to help pro­ huge umbrella big enough for mote leadership within the community, and ple. all genders and orientations. Het­ Although we do not yet own everyone . • to be a part of a national network of lesbian To most gay men and lesbi­ erosexual families will be fine; our own center, there are many and gay publications that exchange ideas ans, it means the central con­ in fact, all families will be bet­ and seek to educate. nights that we are full to capac­ Part of our purpose is to maintain a nection in their lives, which they ter off. Patriarchy can be hard ity. In the first three and a half PRIDE 2010 middle position with respect to the entire want and need to have recog­ on straight men too - especial­ months of 2010, more than 600 community. We must be careful to present all viewpoints in a way that takes into con­ nized by society. Denying that ly those who think that "real" people have attended meetings PLANNING sideration the views of all - women, men, gay people are capable of love men can express emotions (other or events in our Center. There people of color, young and old, and those MEETING from various walks of life. and commitment - denying than anger) and that women and have been 20 different groups The opinions of columnists, editorial writ­ that our families are "real" - queers are human beings. with a variety of missions and all MAY 18 ers and other contributing writers are their defines us as less than human. Change can be a good thing. age ranges. own and do not necessarily reflect the col­ GAY ALLIANCE lective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Love is a crucial human abil­ But those who look through One newly formed local Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. The ity. If gays are "sexual predators the lens of patriarchal ideology group is COLAGE, which is for YOUTH CENTER Empty Closet shall not be liable for any loss or expense that results from the publication incapable of love," we are less and privilege see a very differ­ all children who have a gay, les­ 6PM (whether correctly or incorrectly) or omis­ than human - and those who are ent picture . • bian, bisexual or transgendered sion of an ad. In the event of non-payment, your account may be assigned to a collec­ tion agency or an attorney, and will be liable for the charges paid by us to such collection • • agency or attorney. Letters to the editor: I ------NEVER MISS----- AN EVENT! I The opinions of columnists, editorial writers New York State's oldest continuously-published LGBT and other contributing writers are their own newspaper is only ONE of the many benefits of member- and do not necessarily reflect the collective I I attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee ship. Become a member today and get all the Pride 2010 Valley or The Empty Closet. We will print let­ news, events and goings-on delivered right to your door. ters at the editor's discretion and on a space I I available basis. Only one letter by the same Name writer in a six-month period is allowed. We will not print personal attacks on individuals, Address I I nor will we be a forum for ongoing disputes City/State/Zi(l between individuals. We reserve the right to edit for space and clarity. We will print I Phone I anonymous letters if the name and phone number are provided to the Editor: confi­ E:mail dentiality will be respected. Submissions are I I due by the 15th of the month at: The Empty Membership levels: Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Roch­ I 0$30-99 Advocate 0 $100-999 Champion I ester, NY 14605: e-mail: emptycloset@gagv. 0$1,000-4,999 Triangle Club 0 $5,000+ Stonewall us. Online edition of EC available at www. gayalliance.org. I Benefits include a subscription to the Empty Closet I - mailed to home or work, plus privileges at each , I , I PRIDE 2010 15 level. Phone: 585 244-8640 or mail to the Gay Alliance, I COMING YOUR WAY 875 E. Main St., Suite 500, Rochester, NY 14605 I Home Delivery of The Empty Closet is Free with your annual membership in the Gay Alliance. I 5/10 Ga@V AII-.____ ·ance' > • ------• ~of the getlesee valley MAY 2010 • NUMBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET A 3

here at home as well. No one who is gay FROM PAGE ONE has equal rights." When Soel returned from Iraq he (Light from page 1) served eight or nine months in the Reserve youth present or 20. So, when quiet filled and then came out to his First Sgt. who in the room on Friday, April 16, I was a bit turn informed Soel's commanding offi­ in awe. Throughout the day, students cer. Soel said, "I decided resignation was from all over Monroe County joined the right thing to do. You're officially together in observing the National Day lying, and gay marriage is still against LOCAL AND STATE of Silence. They duct-taped their mouths, military rules. So I decided that having wrote greetings on paper or texted with the option to get married would be better cell phones, their body language grew than lying." wide and expressive. And in their silent The Mississippi Safe Schools Coalition's Soel has a partner and would like to language -- a passionate message of sup­ second annual Second Chance Prom will marry legally and have children. port for lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans­ be held on May 8 in downtown Tupelo, He said, "I had dreams of continuing gender students. Miss. (See article on page A 5) my career, but the policy weighed heav­ "According to the 2007 GLSEN ily on me in Iraq and I knew in my next National School Climate Survey, approxi­ posting I would still have to lie. I couldn't Older women get free mately 32 percent of LGBT students accept this evil policy and couldn't end reported missing a day of school due to mammograms on May 8 the internalized homophobia - and there feeling unsafe. This is eight times the is a lot of it." Highland Breast Imaging, in conjunc­ number of a sample of their heterosexual tion with the Breast Cancer Coalition of peers. In the halls, 90 percent of students Soel's honorable discharge should come through in several months. "I've Rochester and the Cancer Services Pro­ hear the term 'gay' being used in a nega­ gram of Monroe County, are celebrating tive way on a frequent basis. Despite the done everything I could on my end, and now it's up to my commanding officer," Mothers Day by offering free mammo­ long travel our community has taken grams to women 40 and older who do since Stonewall in 1969, homophobia/ he said. "I told them it is an unfair policy and I was unwilling to serve. My com­ not have health insurance or whose health transphobia (and the internalized counter­ insurance does not cover mammograms. part) is still rampant in the lives of young manding officer said she didn't want to discharge me, but if I felt this was the way The date is Saturday, May 8 from 8 people. I feel blessed to be part of a pocket a.m. to 12 p.m. at Highland Breast Imag­ of acceptance and a community of sup­ it had to be, that would be fine. She said she was proud of me for standing up for ing, 500 Red Creek Drive, Suite 130. port and safety. But for some youth who Thanks to a generous donation from may live in the same zip code, their house­ what I believe in." Constance McMillan to Lt. Dan Choi, who has chained him­ the Breast Cancer Coalition of Roches­ hold and daily lives are much different. be grand marshal for ter, a Nurse Practitioner will be avail­ self to the White House fence to protest "Every year, I make dozens of referrals NYC Pride on June 27 able to perform clinical breast exams for for emergency housing for LGBT youth. I DADT twice, most recently on April 20, is an inspiration to Soel. "He's a combat women who have not had one during the don't like to call them 'homeless.' Because NYC Pride announced on April 13 past year. they have homes. The term more fitting vet also," Soel said, "and for him to say it's that Constance McMillen will be one of an unfair policy inspired me to get out, Massage Therapists will be on hand would be 'throw-away' youth. Kicked its Grand Marshals for the 41st Annual to provide free 10-minute chair massage out. Rejected. Disowned. With the loss of and I hope it inspires others. Manhattan LGBT Pride March, which "The part I feel is insulting is that after mammograms. Women can sched­ home often comes loss of family support, will occur on June 27. Constance McMil­ ule appointments with a friend or family religious community, access to previous our society feels it can ask gay men and len, a Mississippi high school honors stu­ women to go and fight, and literally bleed member and receive a "buy one get one care providers, health insurance, educa­ dent, fought back when her school told free" certificate for lunch at Lorraine's tion and safety. So why do they come out, on the flag to keep it red and yet not give her she couldn't take her girlfriend to the us equal rights - to me that's an unac­ Food Factory. younger and younger each year? prom. Parking is free and refreshments will "I'd like to think that these youth find ceptable level of sacrifice and that's the "I never dreamed so many people reason I came out - to say, I am here and be provided. new families, as so many members of the would support my fight to take my girl­ Call Highland Breast Imaging at 487- community have had to do. It's funny, there are thousands like me. The only way friend to the prom, much less that 1'd end we can force the government's hand is to 3300 to make an appointment in advance. as the younger generation doesn't seem up being asked to be a Grand Marshal at Women who cannot make the screening to understand the phrase 'are you fam­ come out, one by one." NYC Pride," said McMillen, an 18-year­ Although many in Soel's unit accepted day can be scheduled for a different day. ily?' as their elders do. But the surrogate old high school senior from Fulton, Mis­ Highland Breast Imaging Center is families they create are budding branches him as gay, he says that homophobia is sissippi, adding, ''I'm really honored and endemic in the military. "In Iraq, homo­ dedicated to helping women meet their of the LGBTQ family tree. I know that touched to be asked to be part of this cel­ healthcare needs. For more detailed infor­ our community takes care of 'its young.' phobic jokes were made at a sexual harass­ ebration." ment and equal opportunity class, when mation about screening day or other I see it every day in the bright, cheerful It all started when her school board services, please contact Sue Swift, Coor­ youth center. In the volunteer chaperons, the instructor said that sexual harassment canceled prom for the entire school - all could be male-male and female-female - dinator, Patient and Community Rela­ facilitators and donors. I observe it within because Constance McMillen wanted to tions, at 487-3305. schools as teachers, both out and closeted, 'but we hope not.' bring her girlfriend, said Joe Solmonese of take these kids under their wings and "Gay people just aren't accepted," Soel the Human Rights Campaign. attempt to shelter them from the hate­ said. "Some people in my unit in Iraq and "Then parents organized a secret Pride Agenda wants to ful language and environment that is so here at home still have a big problem with prom. Needless to say, Constance and her "Find Our Friends" often the norm in educational settings. this. There are a lot of harassing com­ girlfriend weren't invited. They were sent On the Day of Silence, I am always proud ments, but if you complain you are outing to a different location. Beginning in May, the Empire State beyond words. For the energy it takes to yourself. It's a culture of silence." "The school board went to court to Pride Agenda will be launching a new be silent when the whole of a person wants He said, "When I joined up in 2006, I defend their bigoted policy of cancel­ campaign to identify people who support to scream and be seen. For the courage it knew I'd have to live a lie, and I felt that ing the prom. The court stopped short same sex couples' freedom to marry. takes to return to school day after day, the was OK if! could get a chance to respond of forcing them to reinstate the original Mary Zicari of the Pride Agenda says, faith they have that things, indeed, will to 9/11. But it became harder and harder prom, because the school board told the "We know from polling that most New get better for 19bt students. I believe them. to lie - and it was for no reason, since I judge that Constance would be 'welcome Yorkers are in favor of marriage equality. I believe that in their lifetime, gay mar­ could perform my job just as well as any­ and encouraged to attend' a private prom But we need to 'Find Our Friends' and riage will become legal, that GSA clubs one else. It's something that is always over sponsored by parents. ask them to join the network of support will be treated like all other clubs. That your head; you know that at any point "That invitation never came. Instead, for LGBT families. We will be conduct­ the term transgender will be discussed in you could slip and say the wrong thing, when Constance asked the organizers ing one-on-one conversations with thou­ standard school curriculum. or someone could spot you on the street of the private prom about the time and sands of New Yorkers in targeted areas of "For the 200+ students who participat­ holding hands with your partner and place of the event, she was sent to the fake the state, and we need you to volunteer to ed in the Day of Silence rally, they need report you. You realize that no matter how prom, which was attended by just five ensure the success of this historic effort." not worry if their silence was heard... It much they talk about tolerance, you're not other students. The rest of the school par­ This campaign, running from May was thunderous. Heard not only by the going to get equal rights. Someone could tied at a secret location. through September, will bring Pride schools and politicians that they petition be a dirtbag soldier and still get rights "To add bigotry on top of bigotry: two Agenda staff and volunteers in direct con­ for safety, but also by me (and many other good gay soldiers don't have, and that's of the people at the fake prom were stu­ tact with New Yorkers across the state adults in the community) who didn't have just wrong." dents with learning difficulties. Clearly to have conversations with thousands of words to express myself at their age, thus Soel agrees that LGBT military per­ they weren't good enough for the prom New Yorkers about how LGBT families the comparable silence was just that -­ sonnel are getting confusing, frustrating either." need access to marriage and the safety net silence." • mixed messages. The Army needs "warm Students then bragged about their of protections it provides. Until GENDA bodies" - yet discharged 56 crucial Arabic "cleverness" online and sent her hate mail. becomes law, the Pride Agenda will also linguists. The Obama administration is While McMillen has been ostracized speak with New Yorkers about the need trying to get DADT repealed, yet Depart­ and harassed by her classmates at IAHS for transgender civil rights. (DADT from page 1) ment of Defense lawyers are simultane­ over the prom cancellation, her struggle Volunteers will go to the places where even former advocate General Colin Pow­ ously defending it in court. Soel's fellow has attracted national and even interna­ New Yorkers gather: at weekend street ell now calls a policy which should be soldiers were mostly accepting of his ori­ tional support. She was invited to attend festivals and farmer's markets, concerts revoked. The discharge figures for 2009 entation and he wrote an article critical of the GLAAD Awards with Wanda Sykes, in the park and at evening arts events. stand at 443, according to Servicemem­ DADT for the military newspaper Stars was presented with a $30,000 scholarship Locally, the organization will be concen­ bers United on April 22. and Stripes, which had no problems print­ check on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, trating its efforts across Monroe County, Soel decided that he could no longer ing it - but the Pentagon says that as a gay and a Facebook group supporting her has holding a "Find Our Friends" training on live a lie while he was serving in southern man he is unacceptable. Then there is the attracted over 400,000 supporters. Wednesday, May 5. Iraq in 2008-2009. "I was out to most "moral waiver" through which convicted The American Humanist Association The training will be in Webinar for­ of my unit in Iraq and no one seemed rapists, kidnappers and thieves can be (AHA), along with the Grammy-winning mat, so all that is needed is a telephone to have a problem with it," Soel told The released from prison to join the Army - band Green Day and popular singer and and the internet to participate. The first Empty Closet. "I still felt the policy was yet highly qualified gay men and lesbians performer Lance Bass, will co-sponsor "Find Our Friends" activity will be at the unfair. I decided that coming out was the who want to serve their country and have a prom for Mississippi youth, including Lilac Festival in mid-May. Anyone inter­ right thing to do, not only because of the never committed any crimes are barred as students from Itawamba County Agri­ ested in learning more or signing up for policy, but because of the discrimination (DADT continues page 7) cultural High School in Fulton, Miss. (Pride continues page 7) 4 A THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

"In an investigation spanning 21 - regardless of sexual orientation or gen­ countries across six continents, The Asso­ der identity. We encourage all grassroots ciated Press found 30 cases of priests activist groups that support full LGBT accused of abuse who were transferred or equality to affiliate with EAA. In unity Newsfr{Dnts moved abroad. Some escaped police inves­ there is strength!" tigations. Many had access to children in Visit www.equalityacrossamerica.org another country, and some abused again. to learn more about the network, or to "'The pattern is if a priest gets into share actions from local organizations and NATIONAL AND INTERNATIONAL trouble and it's close to becoming a scan­ organizers. dal or if the law might get involved, they send them to the missions abroad,' said Obama signs hospital Comments fly on wrong, it's unacceptable, and no credible Richard Sipe, a former Benedictine monk media outlet should be providing a plat­ and critic of what he says is a practice visitation measure Catholic church abuse form for these spurious anti-gay attacks." of international transfers of accused and On April 15, President Obama signed The clergy abuse scandal facing the GLAAD is encouraging journalists to admitted priest child abusers. 'Anything a presidential memorandum taking Catholic church has drawn massive talk with groups like the Survivors Net­ to avoid a scandal.'" important steps to protect the visitation adverse publicity around the world, with work of Those Abused by Priests (SNAP), The man who was abused in Massa­ and healthcare decision-making rights of the Vatican claiming that the problem is Call to Action, Voice of the Faithful, and chusetts, Joe Callander, was 14 when he LGBT people. not child abuse or the long term cover-up other organizations that are giving voice was raped three times by Pezzoti in 1959 This action was inspired by last year's by church authorities, but rather a diaboli­ to the victims of clergy abuse and calling at Xaverian Missionary Faith High School New York Times profile of the tragic expe­ cal conspiracy of gays, Masons, pro-choice for accountability by the church. in Holliston, Mass., which is no longer rience of partners Lisa Pond and Janice activists and "the media" to damage the Church cuts funding for Maine open. There was a settlement in 1993 for Langbehn. Despite having an advanced church. At the same time, the church con­ homeless; Governor fights back $175K; at that time there were at least two health care directive, Janice, and the cou­ tinues to oppose marriage equality and to The church was a leader in last year's other charges that Pezzoti had molested ple's children, were kept from Lisa's bed­ claim that gay parents endanger their chil­ successful fight to overthrow marriage others. The same year, Pezzoti wrote a let­ side as she lay dying. Lambda Legal dren merely by having them. equality for LGBT citizens of Maine. ter of apology to Callander, in which he represented Janice in a lawsuit against However, many in Catholic countries Maine's Catholic bishop recently denied said he had "cured himself in the jungle." Jackson Memorial Hospital in Miami and are questioning the Vatican's homopho­ funding to a homeless shelter in Portland Pezzoti served in the jungle with the worked with them to revise their policies bic policies. Oscar Arias, president of on the grounds that the shelter supported Kayapo Indians -- and their children -­ in the wake of the tragedy. Costa Rica, said in April that the Roman marriage rights for same sex couples. The and he did so from 1970-2003. No word "Discrimination touches every facet Catholic Church should end its policy of decision implied that opposing recogni­ yet on whether any Indian children were of the lives of lesbian, gay, bisexual and celibacy for priests because it "goes against tion of gay families is more important raped. But as Pam Spaulding noted, the transgender people, including at times of nature". than sheltering the homeless or feeding Catholic Church has taken the moral crisis and illness, when we need our loved Arias also said, according to the Asso­ the hungry. stand that it needs to protect children -­ ones with us more than ever," said HRC ciated Press, that he supports some civil Pam Spaulding, a Maine resident, from the terror of marriage equality for President Joe Solmonese. "No one should rights for same sex couples. wrote on pamshouseblend.com on April gay and lesbian couples. experience what befell the Pond-Lang­ DignityUSA, a national Catholic 15, "Recently it was announced that Pre­ behn family, and the President's action organization serving LGBT Catholics, ble Street's Homeless Voices For Justice National gay rights today will help ensure that the indignities observed that the recent comments were program was informed by Bishop Malone actions set for May Janice and her children faced do not hap­ simply the latest, and most defamatory, hat they were losing ... funding from the pen to another family." in the Vatican's recent attempts to distract ReCI Portland Diocese, because of their National Harvey Milk Day is May Congresswoman Tammy Baldwin from the unfolding revelations about the support of marriage equality. 22, the late activist's birthday. Equality said, "President Obama's decision to direct Catholic Church's failure to deal with "Well, that did NOT sit well with our Across America has issued a call to action the Secretary of Health and Human Ser­ abusive priests. Catholic Governor John Baldacci, who for Harvey Milk Day and the week lead­ vices to take steps to ensure that hospitals "These are just the latest, desperate with others quickly organized a spaghetti ing up to it. participating in Medicare or Medicaid attempts from the Vatican to change the dinner fundraiser." "Inspired and initiated by the National respect the rights of patients to receive subject," said Marianne Duddy-Burke, On April 14 at the Portland Italian Equality March on Washington, LGBTQ visitors and designate others to make deci­ Executive Director of Dignity USA. "It's Heritage Center, Gov. Baldacci personally people are taking to the streets and com­ sions about medical care in the case of an time for our church leaders to stop look­ served each of the 1,000 people who came ing together to forge a national grassroots emergency is the right one. It follows the ing for someone else to blame, and to con­ for a plate of his delicious Baldacci Fam­ movement," Equality Across America lead of many states and makes a strong front the abuse of power and the cover-ups ily recipe spaghetti. Among those bus­ (EAA), organizer of the March, says. statement about who we are as a nation that are the real root of this scandal." sing tables were Maine Attorney General "They're tired of corporate-dominated and what we value. G LAAD urges any media that are Janet Mills and Maine Catholics for Mar­ organizing strategies and pleading hat-in­ "No one should face the distress of considering whether to publicize this anti­ riage Equality head Anne Underwood. hand to politicians and recognize the need lying ill or injured in a hospital bed with gay rhetoric to carefully examine the Maine political figures, such as guberna­ for an activist movement with groups the loved one you designate barred from timing and apparent motives behind the torial candidates Libby Mitchell and Pat rooted firmly on campuses and in com­ your bedside for any other than a compel­ comments. McGowan, were in attendance, showing munities. That's what EAA is building." ling medical reason. For too long, such "There's a clear pattern here," said their support for the homeless center, On May 2, a DADT protest will take access has been arbitrarily denied many Rashad Robinson, Senior Director of which will lose over $33,000 in funding place in Washington D.C. On May 17, individuals, most especially to gay and Media Programs at GLAAD. "Every day from the Catholic church. the International Day Against Homopho­ lesbian Americans. we seem to be seeing a new attempt Molesting priest shuffled off to Bra­ bia, EAA calls for a week of local actions, "President Obama's action tonight by some church leaders to distract peo­ zil to culminate on Harvey Milk's Birth­ puts us another step closer toward our ple from the real issues at the heart of From the investigative piece "Predator day, May 22. The Harvey Milk Day goal of equal rights for all Americans and the abuse crisis. And as the desperation priests shuffled around globe," by AP's Action will be complemented by a series of I applaud his decision." increases, the ugliness of the attacks seems Bradley Brooks and Alessandra Rizzo: regional conferences where activists from According to the April 15 announce­ to be worsening. "There he was, five decades later, the Seattle to Gainesville will debate political ment, the memorandum directs the Sec­ "If the last two weeks have shown priest who had raped Joe Callander in questions, discuss strategy and tactics and retary of Health and Human Services us anything, it's that if one distraction Massachusetts. The photo in the Roman begin developing a broad new leadership. (HHS) to promulgate a regulation requir­ strategy doesn't stick, Vatican officials Catholic newsletter showed him with a "Because LGBT people come from all ing all hospitals that receive federal Medi­ will try another," Robinson continued. smile across his wrinkled face, near-naked racial, ethnic, national, class and other care and Medicaid funding - nearly every "Media need to see and understand this Amazon Indian children in his arms and backgrounds," says Aiyi'nah Ford, a mem­ hospital in America - to allow patients to latest round of attacks for what it is: ugly, at his feet. The Rev. Mario Pezzotti was ber of EAA's Interim National Govern­ designate who may visit them and prohib­ defamatory anti-gay scapegoating that working with children and supervising ing Board, "we believe that winning full iting discrimination in visitation based on contributes to the hostile climate that gay other priests in Brazil. equality is inconceivable without build­ a number of factors, including sexual ori­ people face in the U.S. and worldwide. It's "It's not an isolated example. ing a broad grassroots network of people entation and gender identity.

YOU/i 0<1; ~

[email protected] MAY 2010 • NUMBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET A 5

In addition, the memorandum calls protecting some of Arkansas' most vul­ until the day that Harold fell, because Sudan, the penalty for homosexuality on the Secretary to issue new guidance nerable citizens - children in state care," he has been unable to recover any of his includes the death penalty; and provide technical assistance to hos­ said Stacey Friedman, attorney with Sul­ property. The only memento Clay has is Whereas the United States, in seeking pitals to help them comply with existing livan and Cromwell, co-counsel with the a photo album that Harold painstakingly to promote the core American principles federal regulations that require them to ACLU. "The court reached the right put together for Clay during the last three of equality and "Life, Liberty, and the respect individuals' advanced health care result. Our firm is honored to be associat­ months of his life." pursuit of Happiness," has long champi­ directives and other documents establish­ ed with this effort to protect the kids who The case is Greene v. County of oned the universality of human rights; ing who should make healthcare decisions just want loving, forever families, as well Sonoma et al. Whereas religious leaders in the Unit­ for them when they are unable to do so. as the couples who want to provide homes ed States, along with representatives from Finally, the memorandum directs HHS for these kids." Senate passes Feingold the Vatican and the Anglican Church, to conduct a larger study of the barriers have stated that laws criminalizing homo­ resolution against LGBT people and their families face in Bias wrecks lives of sexuality are unjust; and accessing healthcare. Uganda anti-gay bill Whereas the people and Government California gay seniors of the United States recognize that such The U.S. Senate has unanimously Kate Kendell of the National Center laws undermine our commitment to com­ Arkansas court: gays passed a resolution introduced by U.S. bating HIV/AIDS globally through the may adopt, foster for Lesbian Rights has written a piece Senators Russ Feingold (D-WI), Tom about the unspeakable treatment of two President's Emergency Plan for AIDS Coburn (R-OK), Ben Cardin (D-MD) Relief (PEPFAR) by stigmatizing and An Arkansas court on April 16 struck elderly gay men by Sonoma Co., Calif, and Susan Collins (R-ME) calling on down a law challenged by the Ameri­ which was featured on The Bilerico Proj­ criminalizing vulnerable communities: members of the Ugandan Parliament to Now, therefore, be it can Civil Liberties Union that bans any ect website. reject the so-called ''Anti-Homosexuality Resolved, That the Senate- unmarried person who lives with a part­ "Clay and his partner of 20 years, Har­ Bill." (1) calls on members of the Parliament ner from serving as an adoptive or foster old, lived in California. Clay and Harold The bill, which was introduced in the parent in the state of Arkansas. made diligent efforts to protect their legal in Uganda to reject the "Anti-Homo­ Ugandan parliament in October 2009, sexuality Bill" recently proposed in that "We are happy that the court recog­ rights, and had their legal paperwork in would expand penalties for homosexuality country; nized that Act 1 harms Arkansas's foster place: wills, powers of attorney, and medi­ in Uganda to include the death penalty, (2) urges the governments of all coun­ children because it eliminates potential cal directives, all naming each other. Har­ and require citizens to report information tries to reject and repeal similar criminal­ qualified parents," said Holly Dickson, old was 88 years old and in frail medical about homosexuals to the police or face ization laws; and staff attorney with the ACLU of Arkan­ condition, but still living at home with imprisonment. (3) encourages the Secretary of State sas. "We have a critical shortage of homes Clay, 77, who was in good health. In addition to condemning the pro­ to closely monitor human rights abuses now and this ban was denying good, lov­ "One evening, Harold fell down the posed legislation in Uganda, the bipar­ that occur because of sexual orientation ing homes to our most vulnerable chil­ front steps of their home and was taken tisan resolution also urges all countries and to encourage the repeal or reform of dren." to the hospital. Based on their medical around the world to reject and repeal laws such as the proposed ''Anti-Homo­ The ACLU filed its complaint against directives alone, Clay should have been similar laws that criminalize homosexu­ sexuality Bill" in Uganda that permit the law, known as Act 1, in December consulted in Harold's care from the first ality, and encourages the United States SUGh abuses. 2008. Plaintiffs participating in the case moment. County and health care workers Department of State to closely monitor included a lesbian couple who adopted instead refused to allow Clay to see Har­ human rights abuses based on sexual ori­ an Arkansas foster child before Act 1 old in th~ ospital. The county then ulti­ entation. In addition to the proposed bill ACLU sues Miss. school was passed and would like to open their mately went one step further by isolating in Uganda, there are laws on the books again for cruelty to home to a second special needs child; a the couple from each other, placing the in nations around the world criminaliz­ grandmother who was barred by Act 1 men in separate nursing homes. ing homosexuality. In several countries, lesbian student from adopting her own grandchild ana "Ignoring Clay's significant role in including Iran, Nigeria, Saudi Arabia and The American Civil Liberties Union several married heterosexual couples who Harold's life, the county continued to Sudan, the punishments for homosexual­ filed legal papers on April 22 in federal would have been prohibited by Act 1 from treat Harold as if he had no family ity include the death penalty. court on behalf of lesbian high school arranging for certain friends or relatives to and went to court seeking the power to "I am glad that so many political, reli­ student Constance McMillen regarding adopt their children if they die or become make financial decisions on his behalf. gious and civic leaders in Uganda and a cruel plan to put on a "decoy" prom for incapacitated. Outrageously, the county represented to around the world have spoken out against her while the rest of her classmates were at ''As the proud parents of a former fos­ the judge that Clay was merely Har­ this hateful and dangerous bill before the a private prom 30 miles away. ter child, we are relieved that the court old's 'roommate.' The court denied their Ugandan Parliament. Sadly, this legisla­ The amenaed complaint alleges that recognized how Act 1 harms the many efforts, but did grant the county limited tion is just one example of actions taken the district's violation of the free speech children in the state in need of homes," access to one of Harold's bank accounts around the world to restrict the rights rights of McMillen, an 18-year-old high said Wendy Rickman, who, along with to pay for his care. of people just because of their gender or school senior who sued her school for can­ her partner of 11 years, Stephanie Huff­ "What happened next is even more sexual orientation. We need to speak out celing the prom rather than let her attend man, would like to provide a home to chilling: without authority, without deter­ consistently against all such discrimina­ with her girlfriend, have repeatedly caused another child in need. mining the value of Clay and Harold's tion. The Senate's passage of this resolu­ McMillen to be humiliated and harassed. In the order, Judge Christopher C. possessions accumulated over the course tion begins to move us in that direction, "I really hoped that prom night would Piazza of the Pulaski County Circuit of their 20 years together, or making any and I will continue working with my col­ make all that I've been through worth it, Court held that the law casts an unrea­ effort to determine which items belonged leagues and the administration to con­ then April 2 came and those hopes went sonably broad net and did not "serve the to whom, the county took everything tinue to address this issue," said Feingold, out the window," said McMillen. ''All I State's interest in determining what is in Harold and Clay owned and auctioned Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations ever wanted was to go to my school prom the best interest of the child." He also off all of their belongings. Adding further Subcommittee on African Affairs. with my classmates and my date, like any­ noted that he was troubled by the fact that insult to grave injury, the county removed The resolution reads: one else, and instead I was the target of a the law targeted gay people. The state of Clay from his home and confined him Calling on members of the Parliament mean, nasty joke." Arkansas is expected to appeal the deci­ to a nursing home against his will. The in Uganda to reject the proposed "Anti­ On March 23, the U.S. District Court sion. county workers then terminated Clay and Homosexuality Bill", and for other pur­ for the Northern District of Mississippi "This law was harmful to families Harold's lease and surrendered the home poses. issued a preliminary ruling in McMillen's and children," said Christine Sun, senior they had shared for many years to the Whereas a bill introduced on Octo­ case that school officials violated McMil­ counsel with the ACLU Lesbian Gay landlord. ber 14, 2009, by a member of Parliament len's First Amendment rights when it can­ Bisexual Transgender Project. "The dis­ "Three months after he was hospital­ in Uganda would expand penalties for celed the high school prom rather than let criminatory policies embodied by this law ized, Harold died in the nursing home. homosexuality to include the death pen­ McMillen attend with her girlfriend and did a disservice to children in need of a Because of the county's actions, Clay alty and requires citizens to report infor­ wear a tuxedo. The court stopped short loving home by reducing the number of missed the final months he should have mation about homosexuality to the police of ordering Itawamba Agricultural High potential adoptive and foster parents. We had with his partner of 20 years. Com­ or face imprisonment; School (IAHS) to put the school prom are delighted that the court has found that pounding this tragedy, Clay has literally Whereas many countries criminalize back on the calendar relying on assuranc­ it should not stand." nothing left of the home he had shared homosexuality, and in some countries, es that an alternative "private" prom being "This case was fundamentally about with Harold or the life he was living up such as Iran, Nigeria, Saudi Arabia, and (NewsFronts continues page 8)

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the state in victories for our community, Tarver sounds convinced that ESPA even ahead of seemingly more progressive will continue as a leader in the fight for places like New York City. Tarver said, full equality for all New Yorkers. Look­ "Because it is such a population center ing forward to the Spring Dinner later - both for LGBT people and for deeply this month, he added, "What stands out committed allies - the Pride Agenda is how much the LGBT community in recognizes that both the institutional sup­ Rochester is an integral part of the fabric port and community activism of Roch­ of the political and social life of the city. I A Conversation ester is essential for legislative and social don't see this anywhere else in New York with Joe Tarver: progress statewide on LGBT issues." State and it's a really special experience." On March 13, Tarver traveled to a Asked about the long-term vision for ESPAS INTERIM EXECUTIVE cold and rainy Rochester to hear what the Pride Agenda, Tarver said, "The Pride DIRECTOR local activists had to say. He told The Agenda exists to achieve equality under Empty Closet after his visit, "We're all New the law for LGBT people, with the larger By Ove Overmyer Yorkers, but we do approach LGBT issues goal of justice for all. Winning legislation In a varied career that includes several differently. There's a great deal of value in is just one step - we also need to make major victories for the LGBT community, the viewpoints that I may not hear, living sure that these laws, once passed, are Joe Tarver brings to his new position as downstate in NYC. When I first started implemented fully and that LGBT New Interim Executive Director of the Empire with ESPA, my first trip outside NYC as Yorkers have every opportunity to live full State Pride Agenda (ESPA) a proven track the then Communications Director was lives. Our relationships with allies who record of accomplishment and a manage­ to Rochester to meet the community. So care about our issues will continue to be ment style that has won him praise from it was entirely appropriate that my first important as we work toward the larger his peers. trip as the Interim Executive Director was vision of racial, economic and social jus­ Many colleagues say that Joe has gar­ again to Rochester to hear the concerns tice for all people." • nered a keen marketing acumen from and viewpoints of those who are doing the both the public and private sectors, and day-to-day local work that's necessary to has rubbed elbows with countless rough win statewide equality." and tumble political operatives who have Asked point-blank why Rochesterians been rolling in and out of Washington should support ESPA, Tarver said, "We Joe Tarver D.C. since 1986. His ability to lead the can't win statewide equality without the organization through a transition period pany Arnold and Porter Consultants and work of our allies across the state. Rocheste­ was never questioned. rians' powerful advocacy and contributions Joe became the Interim Executive then with Cassidy and Associates. He was also a Legislative Aide in the U.S. House don't just help us win our statewide legisla­ Director on March 1, when Alan Van tive priorities - they also make a huge dif­ Capelle left ESPA after seven prosper­ of Representatives for Texas Congressman Solomon Ortiz. ference directly in your community." ous years. Van Capelle now works for Tarver added, "Critical funds raised Lake Avenue the New York City Comptroller's office. The Empty Closet caught up with Joe a few weeks ago. He said, "My first priority from events like the Spring Dinner go Tarver says Van Capelle is now one of directly to the work we are doing in the highest paid openly gay government is to keep the Pride Agenda strong and to Baptist Church make progress on the important work that and around Monroe County, including employees in N.Y.C. Many new laws and trainings for local Marriage Ambassadors, changes in government policies benefiting must be done for our community while a new Executive Director is being hired. I organizing local union members and staff, A WELCOMING the LG BT community occurred under and strengthening relationships with faith Alan Van Capelle's leadership, and Tarver have to say, however, that I am very fortu­ nate because we have an incredibly talent­ leaders through work with the Rochester & AFF IRMING thinks the most critical impact Alan had Interfaith Alliance. Rochester's support on the Pride Agenda was his strong orga­ ed staff here at the Pride Agenda, a solid work plan in place for 2010 and a Board also helps us secure millions of dollars CONGREGATION nizational skills. in state funding for the members of our Tarver began his employment with that is committed to seeing that we move forward without a hiccup during this LGBT Health and Human Services Net­ ESPA back in 2001, just before the Sex­ work, including local organizations like Invites Vou! ual Orientation Non Discrimination Act transition period. I want the new Execu­ tive Director to take over an organization GAGV, MOCHA, AIDS Care and Rain­ (SONDA) became law in New York State. bow SAGE." 10:00 AM: Joe served as Managing Director of Oper­ that is already poised to win this year ations, responsible for the day-to-day work and next in Albany on marriage equality, Sunday morning of the Pride Agenda. Earlier, Joe was the GENDA and Dignity for All Students." worship service Pride Agenda's Communications Direc­ Tarver says hiring the new Executive tor, playing key roles in the Pride Agen­ Director is a Board-driven process that 11:30 AM: da's groundbreaking work with gay and includes input from many LGBT lead­ Class on Igbt lesbian survivors of 9/11 victims, build­ ers and our allies from across the state, ing bipartisan support that resulted in the including some from the Rochester area. liberation theology He added, "The Board has indicated passage of SONDA in 2002, and further­ Childcare & ing the organization's current public poli­ its goal of having the new person in place cy and legislative priorities. by the spring and perhaps even by the Sunday School for In Washington, D.C., Joe was Direc­ Rochester Spring Dinner on May 22. If children are available. tor of the Office of White House Liaison not then, I feel sure it will be soon there­ at the Department of State during the first after." The Spring Dinner in Rochester is Clinton Administration and was one of one of the largest annual fundraisers for Lake Avenue a group of first-ever openly gay political the nonprofit organization. is located appointees by any Presidential Adminis­ Tarver added that he is not a candidate Baptist Church tration. just off Lake Avenue near for the position and this was a decision he Christina Smith Before that, he was a senior aide to communicated to the Board at the same the stop light at 145 Lake Presidential Transition Committee Dep­ Licensed Massage Therapist time he was asked to step up to become Avenue. uty Director Mark Gearan and assistant the Interim Executive Director. R edeem this c oupon to Treasurer Robert Farmer on the 1992 Many ESPA Board members, and for 2 0 % o ff Clinton for President Campaign and part Tarver, quickly admit that Rochester has your n ext massag e For more information phone of the Campaign's senior finance staff. always been a fundamental part of achiev­ 585- 458-5765 From 1986-1990 he was in the private ing LGBT equality and justice in New 5 8 5. 4 64. 89 57 sector, first with the public affairs com- York State. Historically, Rochester has led

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in late March, and in-district meetings FROM PAGE ONE are continuing in key Senate Districts across the state. (DADT from page 1) If you would like to participate in an "immoral". in-district meeting, or are interested in So what is next for Joe Soel after working with the Pride Agenda and being his discharge comes through? "The next involved in this campaign, advocates from step for me is working on a book about key districts will be traveling to Albany on serving under DADT in Iraq," he said. May 11 to meet with key senators who are "I comment on a variety of political crucial to the passage of GENDA before issues involved in war and on internalized the end of session in 2010. For more infor­ homophobia. It's the power of an entire mation about key districts, please contact organization against an isolated individu­ Mary Zicari at the Empire State Pride al who may not realize that there are other Agenda (585-271-2420) or at mzicari@ gay people in the same unit or battalion. prideagenda.org. It's constantly looking over your shoulder. I'll have to wait until I'm out to publish. ''I'll look for work as a stylist and settle Vandals hit Manhattan down with my partner and hopefully raise LGBT Center on April 14 a family in the Rochester area - and just live in peace." The New York City Anti-Violence Although marriage is not yet legal Project (AVP) expressed outrage at an for Soel and his partner in NYS, they incident that occurred on April 14, at can marry elsewhere and have their mar­ the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgen­ riage recognized here. "I feel like staying der Community Center (The Center) in in under this policy would take away my Manhattan. chance of marrying and having a family Staff members arriving to work dis­ before my term of service expires in 2014. covered a burned rainbow flag hanging I don't want to wait that long." on a poster display case outside The Cen­ He ended, "I would like to say that I ter. Center staff immediately contacted still love the people in my unit like broth­ the NYPD and called AVP to report 140 ALEX MAY SPECIALS ers and they want the same things out of this despicable act of hate violence. The life that I do - which is a home and a fam­ NYPD's Hate Crimes unit is handling the ily. They are straight and can have that. investigation and AVP is working with the As long as I wear the uniform I can't - NYPD and The Center to respond to this May 5th and after serving in Iraq I find that totally incident. Over 100 people rallied outside (Wednesday) unacceptable. the Center on April 21 to protest the van­ "My First Sgt. was respectful of me dalism. Cinco De Mayo Celebration when I came out, and helped me - I have "Hate violence comes not only in the $8 Dos Equis pitchers the greatest respect for him and my com­ form of physical assault, but in the bias, manding officer. In spite of the attitudes harassment, bullying and intimidation $1 off Corona light bottles of the institution, most people in it are that LGBTQ people face every day," said $4 Tequilla shots good, decent people. Sharon Stapel, Executive Director of the "I need to speak out. If I'm silent and New York City Anti-Violence Project. Menu specials to include quesadillas, tacos just take my discharge and walk away, "This act of hate, aimed at The Center, and other fiesta foods then I'm not fulfilling my responsibility a valued and valuable space for LGBTQ to stand up for what I believe." • community members, cannot be tolerated in a city and world as diverse as ours." "The act of hate demonstrated outside May 12th (CRF from page 1) the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgen­ (Wednesday) ruary "Out of the Closets and Into the der Community Center in the Village Streets" conference, and the group that is unacceptable," said Council Speaker Featuring Frankie & Jewels 6-9pm organized two buses to Washington, DC Christine C. Quinn. "I was angered and 2 for 1 drink specials for the National Equality March, is plan­ deeply disturbed when I heard someone ning a local action for Harvey Milk Week would go to such great lengths to burn a Buy one pasta dinner get one for % price at Rochester's City Hall. The rally will rainbow flag and pin it to the outside of take place on Friday, May 2l. the building. The Center has long been CRF says, "We need people to help us a safe space for LGBT people and will May 30th plan this event and participate in a rally continue to serve New Yorkers who need (Sunday) outside, and also people who are inter­ specific health and social resources. We ested in participating in a direct action." will continue to combat hate through Memorial Day Cook Out The CRF has regular planning meet­ education to ensure spaces like the Cen­ $3 plates: hamburger or hotdog, ings each Tuesday at 7 p.m. at Equal ter stay safe. We will continue to speak Grounds, 750 South Ave. For more infor­ out against hate and to ensure spaces like macaroni salad or potato salad & chips mation, contact the group at rochester­ the Center stay safe. Our community will Domestic pints $1,50 [email protected] . • continue to stand up against all acts of hate." "I was deeply aggrieved and angered to hear that the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexu­ Every Friday Happy Hour Specials (Linked from page 1) al and Transgender Community Center 2 for 1 drink specials 2 p.m. "Linked-by-Love" t-shirts will be was vandalized under the cover of dark­ provided to those who register by Mon­ ness Tuesday night," said New York State % priced appetizers aay, May 17. Senator Tom Duane. "The Center repre­ $1 off fish fry Also, on Wednesday, May 19 at 7 p.m. sents an entire community whose sense of there will be a free screening of the docu­ security has been violated by this targeted mentary "The Times of Harvey Milk" at violence, but we will not be intimidated Karaoke Every Tuesday & Saturday 10pm-2am the Gay Alliance's Youth Center. Light and we will not be victimized. The Cen­ refreshments will be served. ter is working with the New York City Contact Todd Plank at 278-4190 or Police Department's 6th precinct and Sunday Euchre Tournaments @ 3:00pm Anne Tischer at 426-0862 . • Hate Crimes Unit and the New York City Anti-Violence Project to respond to this Prizes for 1st and 2nd place LOCAL AND STATE apparent hate crime and I am confident that those responsible will be brought to Food Specials (pride Agenda continued from page 3) justice. This event is only the latest indica­ $7 domestic pitchers the training should contact Mary Zicari, tor of the continued need to reduce igno­ at the Empire State Pride Agenda (585- rance, hatred and bigotry in our society." 271-2420) or [email protected]. "I am appalled by the recent hate Monday Trivia 9-11 :OOpm 3,000 letters of support for GENDA crime incident at the LG BT Community The campaign to pass GENDA (the Center," said Assembly Member Danny Featuring Blake from Kings of Karaoke Gender Expression Non Discrimination O'Donnell. "Leaving a burned pride flag Act) is moving forward. Advocates from at the symbolic doorstep of our commu­ around New York State have continued nity is an act of intimidation that should Find us on facebook educating their State Senators about the be condemned by every New Yorker. I am and become a fan! importance of passing this civil rights bill. grateful that the New York Police Depart­ During the first quarter of the year, activ­ ment is taking this incident seriously and ists and volunteers helped collect and dis­ will make every effort to catch the culprit 140 Alexander Street tribute close to and bring them to justice. As an out and The Pride Agenda organized a let­ proud member of this community and Rochester, New York 14607 ter drop day in early March. Those patron of the LGBT Center, I will do letters were delivered by trans activists everything in my power to ensure that the 585-256-1000 • www.140alex.com from around the state. The Statewide Center remains a safe space." GENDA Call-In Day was implemented (Local & State continues page 8) 8 A THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

have posted Facebook messages saying LOCAL AND STATE they wish she were dead and sent her such text messages as, "I don't know (Local & State continuedfrom page 7) why you come to this school because "The LG BT community will not be no one likes your gay ass anyways." intimidated by acts of vandalism directed In response to the court's March 23 at this important institution in our com­ order, the complaint also adds a request YOUR BODY munity," said Assembly Member Deborah for compensatory damages for an amount Glick. "We stand united with the broader to be determined later at trial. Village community to ensure the safety all ''After the court ruled that IAHS those who visit the Center." acted illegally when it canceled the prom, MASSAGE "This chilling act of hate reminds us we hoped that Constance would be able that despite the gains the LGBT commu­ to attend the private prom without fur­ nity has made violent intolerance is still ther incident," said Christine P. Sun, www.yourbodymassage.com a very real and disquieting aspect of our Senior Counsel with the ACLU national society," said Assembly Member Micah LGBT Project, who represents McMil­ Z. Kellner. "It is critical that justice is len along with the ACLU of Mississippi. delivered swiftly because it sends a mes­ "But instead there was a malicious plan James R. Yost, L.M.T. sage - particularly to LGBT youth - to further ostracize and humiliate her. It - that civil society does not align itself with is hard to conceive of adults behaving in bigotry, but rather embraces the diversity such a cruel way." that makes our city great. As an openly McMillen is represented by Bennett & Minute bisexual man, I understand acutely how and Sun, as well as by Norman C. Simon, 60 90 important these messages are in the social Joshua Glick, and Jason Moff of Kramer Therapeutic and emotional health of the younger Levin Naftalis & Frankel LLP, and Alys­ members of our community. I am pleased son Mills of New Orleans. Massage Sessions to learn that the NYPD has acted appro­ The case name is Constance McMil­ priately in the investigation of this deplor­ len v. Itawamba County School District, able hate crime." et al. Additional information is avail­ "The LG BT community is a strong able at www.aclu.orgllgbt-rights/fulton­ by Appointment, and proud community that will not be ms-prom-discrimination. There is also a intimidated by cowardly acts of igno­ Facebook group for people who want to rance. Intolerance like this should not be phone 202-8754 support McMillen, "Let Constance Bring tolerated by anyone," said Assemblymem­ Her Girlfriend to the Prom," at www.face­ or visit us online ber Matthew Titone. book.com/pages/Let-Constance-Take­ "This hateful act is yet another Her-Girlfriend-to-Prom/357686784817. reminder of how far we have to go toward ) making our City one that is free of hatred Now Offering and bigotry at all times and for all peo­ APA revises DSM ple," said Council Member Jimmy Van statement on gender Hot Stone Massage Bramer of Queens. "I am confident that the NYPD, along with the help of New identity; much more Yorkers, will find those responsible for remains to be done this attempt at intimidation." • The American Psychiatric Associa­ tion (APA) proposes changes to the NATIONAL AND INTERNATIONAL Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Now Accepting Mental Disorders. (NewsFronts continuedfrom page 5) The public comment phase of the VISA and Master Card. planned by parents would be open to all review process ended April 20. students, including McMillen. "Upon reviewing the APA's proposed However, according to legal papers, at revisions, it appears that they no lon­ a meeting with school officials, parents ger consider gender identity that differs then decided to cancel that private prom from birth sex to be a basis for psychiat­ without notifying McMillen because they ric diagnosis," said Human Rights Cam­ did not want to allow McMillen to attend, paign Associate Director of Diversity instead organizing a "decoy" prom for Allyson Robinson. "By focusing instead McMillen and her date and still another on the experience of incongruence, an prom for the rest of the class. often distressing conflict between a per­ McMillen and her date then attend­ son's physical characteristics and their ed the event the school had told her was sense of gender identity, the APA has UTlandish "the prom for juniors and seniors" on made an important step toward the des­ April 2, where they found only seven tigmatization of transgender lives." other students attending. Principal Trae While affirming this shift, HRC VideoS. Gifts &Leatber Wiygul and several school staff members President Joe Solmonese pressed the APA Wh.r. ii's 1M to be OllT were supervising that event while most of to do more. "These diagnostic catego­ McMillen's classmates were at the other ries are frequently used by opponents prom in Evergreen, Mississippi. of equality to deny basic civil rights to We.s+ern New York's Pretriere GftI &- lesbi'tn V.cleo &- GUT ~iore "Constance is a very brave young transgender Americans, and in that way woman, and she has suffered tremen­ become a significant source of emotion­ dously because of the animosity and hate al distress themselves," said Solmonese. she's felt coming from her classmates and "The APA must address this heinous her community which the school's actions practice and do more to empower mental have encouraged," said Kristy Bennett, health professionals as they seek to heal nfroducing... Legal Director of the ACLU of Missis­ the damage caused by stigma, bias, and sippi. "Even after a federal court found prejudice." that the school violated her constitutional HRC also called in its commentary rights, an 18-year-old girl has been made for the complete removal of "transves­ the scapegoat and an outsider in the town tic disorder," which pathologizes male­ 5It-IR DESIGN where she's lived all her life. For the school to-female cross-dressing, from the final to subject Constance to this type of hostil­ DSM-5 document. ity is simply inexcusable." "The persistence of this archaic cat­ The amended complaint contains egory contradicts the positive shift the -Located in OUTIandish Leather! new details about events that have APA made with gender incongruence taken place since the ACLU first filed and tacitly affirms an understanding of -Available By Appointment! McMillen's case on March 11, includ­ gender based in sexism, not science," said ing about the way her classmates have Solmonese. -Custom Designl Alterations! treated her. Most of McMillen's class­ The proposed changes are slated to go mates no longer speak to her, and some into effect in 2013 . • -Complimentary Basic Alterations Provided for Items Howe & Bassett Purchased at OUTIandish! Outlandish Videos, Gifta & Leather Professional Plumbers Since 1885 2U North Goodman Street (In the Village Gate) Hours: Monday - Saturday 11 AM until 9 PM & Sundaya Noon until 5 PM After-Houfl VldeolDVD Drop Box Is Avallablel 271-4040 Phone: 585.780 .8383 • www.outlandllh1.com • outlindlah@frontiemetnet MAY 2010 • NUMBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET A 9

'I1ie ClWchester Women's Community Chorus =A IDS ... invites you to... • WAI ,K I oW

Saturday, J1une 5th, 8 p .m . Silent Auction starts at 7:30 p.m. ~~~ iHochstein School of Music TAK · P·SI A 50 N, Plymouth Ave, S ,OSITIVE DIRECT lON! J ·O IN THE 19TH ANNUAL AIDS WALK ArlPeace - a group of Rochesleryouth - To B E N E F1T A IDS 'CARE Will be .sharing their talents J Th e organizatl n formed. by the In rg r · f AID Ro he t ~ r and AID ommunit Health ,ente

At the door ticket pri~es : 12: Adult . 10 Studentl Se nior SATURDAY $7 Children 1: 2a.nd younger Ju 5,2010 Save $2 ani advance t i cke~s! Avarilable fmm: Chorus Membe rs GEN ESEE VALLEY PARK IEq ual Grou nd s Coffee Parkl·eigh Pharmacy R EGIST RAT10N: 9:30 A.M. WALK BEGINS: 11 :00 A.M. MDre infDmunioll: Www.tllcrwcc.or& * 585.2;4.4441 /gil language il'l;erpr~Jed and handicap accessible.

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y4fi unday July 11th 201 . 1 ) 2010 HONORARY 'CHAIR try C:Iub D R. ANNE KRE SS,. P RES IDEN T MONROE COMMUNITY COLLEGE Hosted by the IGBO Mid-Year 201 1 Bowling Tournament Committee FOOD, ENTE TA NME N T $90 per person includes go·lf & cart, 2 beverages on course, Be P IZ - s f lunch t .appetizer bar dinner. p lzes and more! DOGS W E LCOME! J in II Paw fr the' au e'l and walk With . our pon ored do t

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Rlr e ervatio ns .acRochester/AI DSWal Proceeds (caposl; re1j'Iliredl. to ,benefit to register~ AIDS Care and th become Hole Spor sor, GAGV Youth Group. or have a ques Ion; contac us a: Visit www.p . eo " .0111 jerry@igbomy2011 .org. AIDS 'CARE fo~ details. www,igbomy2011.org The Center for Positive L'ving 10 A THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

P~D DE F&~ I LY DAY at the Memorial Art Gallery

When: Saturday July 17, 12-3pm Where: Memorial Art Gallery (Parking in the Memorial Art Gallery lot is free for participants.)

Cost: $5 (Six and under free) The Experience: Upon entering the Gallery, register children at the Pride table for an art class (taught in one of Christopher Cain, Ron Heerkens Jr., Danny Hoskins, Kristin the MAG classrooms by a professional artist). Three different Mellema JanlineMercandelti, Jason Mincer. Saraih Peters t times will be offered. Visit the museum collection or take a itholas,Roger .s, Dawn Sargent and Matt Tappon guided tour and see the wondrous art that lives right here Gordon Schwinn, a talented young songwmeris irritated in Rochester. Then take a walk on the grounds. You never thet he must complete 8 children's song about Spring know what you might encounter: the bubble man, a face f-ora childrens show hosted by his boss. Mr. Bung'ee. Unexpectedly; he suffers a brain malfunction. Rushed to painter or one of Rochester's finest storytellers spinning a the. hosl?jta~ his frien.ds, family and doctors oomfort and yarn. Don't forget the Parade starts at 3pm so get a good gwde .hlm tnroug.h .h/s surgery. As h'.e reoavers, the seat along Goodman Street. Most of all enjoy Pride with your creatIVe block lifts 8S he gains new insiqhtsthat .help him reevaluate what Is really imporfant In life. family and your community. RSVP to (585) 244-8640 ext. 16 Contact: For tIckets and Information, call Brian Doran, Gay Alliance (585) 244-8640, ext. 16. 60 E-mail: [email protected] 795 E.ast Main Street. Rochester, NY 1.4605 or Karen Goulet, Pride & Joy Families (one block EM[of Alexander In ROC~5tet ' S Tl1a.tre Row) 'Www blackfriars org (585) 244-8640, ext. 37 E-mail: [email protected] MAY 2010 • NUMBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET A 11

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We are three blocks from downtown. One & one-half blocks south of the War Memorial. 12 A THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

HAT:E CRIME. RELATIONSHIP VIOLENCE PICK-UP eRI ABUSE ,... POLICE Prid CRIME Welcome to Pride 2010 Corner! This is where you can learn about the progress in planning for Pride UP 2010. We want you to know what is happening, and we want you to share this information with all those you love - let's get our straight pals involved too! Mark your Calendars! Saturday, July 10: ..... Gay Day at Seabreeze, 11am-4pm Sunday, July 11: ...... Rainbow Flag Raising at City Hall, RGMC to perform; Tea Dance at Boulder Coffee, Clinton Avenue Monday, July 12: ...... Youth PRIDE Dance Friday, July 16: ...... PRIDE Kick-Off at the Strathallan Hotel Saturday, July 17: ..... PRIDE Parade Registration forms online now! HARASSMENT Theme is "Living History" Saturday, July 17: ...... Festival, Headliner - Amber (same location as RELATIONSHIP last year: parking lot on College Street behind VIO ENe p'leK-UP CRIME ARSON HATE Auditorium Theatre Sunday, July 18: ...... PRIDE Picnic, New Family Area, CRIME RELATIONSHIP VIOLENCE Genesee Valley Park, 1-7pm SEXUAL ASSAULT USE Pride in May: BURGLARY DISCRIMINATION BIAS HATE Attend PRIDE 2010 meetings if you have ideas and/or want to get involved. May 18 in the Gay Alliance Youth Center, 6pm. RELATIONSHIP VIOLENCE P CK If you enjoyed last year's PRIDE events, you, your friends and family will UP CRIME SEXUAL ASSAULT ARSON HA,TE love to attend all the events this year!

CRIME POLICE ~ 118, LP HARASSMENT We have no formal May PRIDE 2010 fundraisers or events. In June, the Laramie Project - 10 Years Later on 6/24-26 will be a ben­ efit for PRIDE 2010. Please see ad on page 8-20 in this Empty 585·2,44 8,640 x17 Closet. PRIDE GUIDE coming in June EC! Or PRIDE-fully, INew confldent.ial on~ ine report fOlrmat 'e; PRIDE 2010 Co-Chairs: www.gayailiance.org Carrie Vernon and Michael J. Hardy Ga -Alliance OCf the genesee valley

Until gay rights become fully realized, you need more than talk. You need to figure out a smart financial future for you and your partner.

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not partial to the Kennedys (as the 1980 Democratic presidential primary would bear out). We were walking on eggshells." In 1977, Midge Costanza facilitated a historic meeting of lesbian and gay activ­ ists in the White House, the first meeting of its kind. The late Jean O'Leary, then the co-executive director (with Bruce History Corner East High School in 1950. Voeller) of the National Gay Task Force, Politics had been a consuming side­ was one of those present and remembered Famous Midge Costanza quotes: line for Midge Costanza since 1954, Human dignity is a right, not a privi­ Midge's opening remarks: "This is the when she became a "boiler room girl" for first time in the history of this country lege, a right inherited at birth. Averell Harriman's gubernatorial cam­ The goal of all governments should be that a president has seen fit to acknowl­ paign. Two years later she worked for edge the rights and needs of some 20 mil­ to create a social environment in which Adlai Stevenson. She entered politics in every person can reach their full poten­ lion Americans. We are highly optimistic 1959 as an executive committee member that it will soon lead to complete fulfill­ tial. of the 22nd Ward of Rochester. In 1964, I'm not a woman who just happens to ment of President Carter's pledge to end she managed the senatorial campaign in all forms of federal discrimination on the be an Assistant to the President ... I'm an Monroe County for Sen. Robert Ken­ basis of sexual orientation." Assistant to the President who just hap­ nedy, and became vice-chairman of the The Rev. Troy Perry, who founded TO STAND ON pens to be a woman. local Democratic committee. She was the Metropolitan Community Church The White House should be the pres­ the first woman elected to the Rochester in 1967, sighed with deep sorrow when ident's window to the nation, a place city council in 1973, and then became told the news of Midge's passing. Troy and, upon meeting her, felt that she was where the people can voice what they the city's vice-mayor. "If Bella Abzug and recalled: "I met Midge in 1977 as one of a longtime friend. Midge was a unique want, what they feel and what they need. Gloria Steinem had not started it, I'd the first gays and lesbians to be invited individual who took her opportunity to When anybody's rights are threat­ never have been considered a serious can­ to the White House to talk to the federal serve, to recognize and give credibility to ened, nobody's rights are secure. didate," Midge said. government. Midge welcomed us to the the plight of others." We cannot expect government to "She was the leading vote-getter when White House for that historical meet­ Her forthright manner and occa­ guarantee equal results -- but ... we can we all ran in 1973 and took the city back ing. In the 1980s, she was honored by the sionally biting humor brought Midge, expect government to provide and guar­ from the Republicans. She was a great Metropolitan Community Churches for who once described herself as "a loud­ antee equal opportunity. campaigner, no doubt about it," said for­ her work for the gay community. Midge mouthed, pushy little broad," the admira­ When we start electing and appoint­ mer city councilor John "Jerry" G. Cur­ and I both spoke to the Western Gay tion of some, but rankled others. ing mediocre women -- then, and only ran. Pride organizations at the end of January After resigning from her White House then, we will achieve total equality with "She brought enormous vitality to the this year (2010). While I know - because job in 1978, Midge moved to Los Ange­ men. political life of Rochester in the late '60s she told me - that she was a closeted les­ les. During the '80s she became a vice The right to choose your own destiny and early '70s," former city councilor bian - she always fought for LGBT rights president of a West Los Angeles film -- it's not what you choose that merits Chris Lindley said. "I think she had an and for that, I will always be gratefuL" company. In 1990, she moved to San respect; it's the right to make that choice. ability to connect with people that was But Midge wasn't solely focused on Diego, where she worked on several polit­ I have come a long way. Was it because quite remarkable." gay rights. She was also a strong advo­ ical campaigns. For West Hollywood I earned it? I don't know. Is it because I Former Mayor William A. Johnson cate for women's rights, as longtime les­ City Councilmember and civil rights had opportunities that kinda fell before said that Ms. Costanza was "a natural bian politico Diane Abbitt remembers: "I attorney John Duran, who chaired the me, and I made the right choices? I don't politician" and noted, "Many may have knew Midge very well during the Carter board of LIFE Lobby during the 1990s, know. All I know is, I'm very proud to wanted to see her become the first female International Women's Year era. She and Midge was a mentor: "Midge Costanza have participated in my life. I feel that mayor in Rochester." Bella Abzug were quite a pair. She did so was an early teacher for many of us after I've never wasted it or disrespected this Her effort to unseat the GOP's much for all marginalized Americans and Harvey Milk's death. She taught us about opportunity of making choices and going entrenched Rep. Barber Conable Jr. in especially for the LGBT community. She having access to power and was one of the as far as I can. 1974 was unavailing, except that she met was the first person in any administration first who demanded that we have a seat at A daughter of Italian immigrants Jimmy Carter, who came to campaign for to formally recognize our community and the table." from Rochester, New York, who never her. When Carter announced his candi­ the discrimination we experience. She From 2000 to 2003, she was a spe­ went to college, I say to those people who dacy for president, she served as co-chair­ was smart and funny. People loved her (Shoulders continues on page 16) ask if I'm qualified to make comments or woman of his New York state campaign. to call myself a leader, I say to them: Out He asked her to second his nomination of 23 million Americans in the United at the 1976 Democratic National Con­ States, the president asked me to help him vention. Carter later appointed her to the serve and run the most powerful govern­ post of Assistant to the President for Pub­ ment in the world. I think I'm qualified. lic Liaison to youth, the elderly, minori­ ties, women, gays and lesbians. "The White House should be the pres­ Shoulders To Stand On: ident's window to the nation," Costanza Midge Costanza, an icon said. "(It should be) a place where the of women's rights people can voice what they want, what they feel and what they need." By Evelyn Bailey Bob Burke, another openly gay long­ Margaret "Midge" Costanza, a trail­ time politico who runs his own politi­ blazing Rochester political figure and cal consulting company, worked in the social and political activist who rose to White House and remembers Midge this become a presidential adviser, has died. way: "I had just started working in the Ms. Costanza, 77, died in San Diego Carter Administration when this power on March 23, after a battle with can­ package of a woman strode up to me and LGBT RECORDS ARE DISAPPEARING cer. Midge, as she is remembered by said, 'We're unique here.' She had found Records are no longer accessible or available due to individuals dying, Rochestarians, was born Nov. 28, 1932, out that I worked for Robert F. Kennedy organizations, agencies, and groups relocating, and not having a repository to in LeRoy, Genesee County, to Philip in Los Angeles in the Presidential Cam­ Joseph Costanza and Concetta (Granata) paign of 1968 and she had worked for preserve records. Costanza. When she was five, the fam­ him in the 1964 Senatorial campaign, as ily moved to Rochester, where Midge well as the Presidential race. The inner Help preserve RocheSler's GLBT hislOrv attended School 33 and graduated from circle of the Carter White House was The Gay Alliance in conjunction with the Documentary Heritage Program wants to be sure the record of work done by these groups and their impact on Rochester and the Genesee Valley region survive as a part of New York State's rich cultural, political, social and economic history. Whal is Needed Organizational records: Financial, Minutes of Meetings, Formal and Informal Records - Written and Electronic, Public Relations Material, Posters, Informational Brochures, Event Advertising Flyers, Correspondence To and From, Photographs, Ephemera. Individual Collections: Gay Civil Rights, HIV AIDS, Religious Response to GLBT Community, Political Development at Local, State, and Federal level. Publications (other than the Empty Closet). If you have any information you can share, to identify and locate these records, Contact GAGV or the Archival Consultant, Nicole Menarchem, $30FF $60FF at [email protected] or (585) 244-8640 x32 DRY CLEANING DRY CLEANING onan yo rdero verm ona ny ordero ver~ 30 N~lIIli~~~heJ ~ new york state 1$, arc h i v e s 14 A THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010 ACal o Act·on

Dear Em ty P Closet Readers: Will there e ver be ' a vaccine to sto For the first time ' P the spread of AIDS~ m,ore than 16 00' In 2010, it looks like • ~~~pite of P~ss7m~~~~~~ers in Th~i/an~~~~n r~7allY say YES, And it , :: ne;d:~t~~~~~~~~~S~t~o ~~i~~e~/~~;ir~a~~~m~~~~~%e~~~:ves :~%~:e~et~~:~ w~thout the en, It Will need to be tesf:~: ;:posures. in '~t~~7:~r~ible th;t ~~;:~e~~~a/most ex~~~~~!;~dY To be honest th' Y men. s, for a vaccine to b~7-s of vaccines wilt e sponsors ma~y 0 efr Is,growing conce Icensed for gay men d the Inter ' rn at the h' h ROche 0 not enroll in the st~atlon~1 HIV vaccine ~g est levels of the fed focus ~~e~ then there is the %;hICh is taking Pla~e~rch ~tudies. If a ;;:~fovernment that R' h ore homogenous POPU/:~~~~s:lity that f~~:; ~ie;en Ci~ies acr~;snt~~~~ o~ gay Ig t now in Roch . at Would this m vaccine research ffi' . inclUding

;:anlt get HIV from ~~ter, We are testing a eal7 to the gay commZ 0ly' rts will o gay men and e vacCine) and new Combinatio m ? We desperately ne prodUce a balanced in of vaccines that ar The team at the' ed Your help, mmune response. Th~ sYnthe~ic (you AIDS' and only a Roc~ester Victory AII' ' . stUdy IS limited community's ' vaccine wilt mak "ance IS committ questions YO~:~~~:,:n~b~~~ ne~ ~~~~i~!Sib~,~~t ~g~~n~O~:o~~~,~ ~~~:r~s 'a World Without Please jot , enrollment. If not th c tervlcto alliance w/tho,ut the gay , n us In this fight! ' en call Us (585) 756 -2c;A till anSWer SinCerely, 1/0(ec¥ M~chael C. Keefer r1-1~ Pnncipal I " M.D. U ' nvestlgator R nlverSity of R ' ochester V'ct ochester School of ~ o,~ Alliance edlclne and 0 ' enttstry

601 ElmwoOd Av 585,275,5871, enue , Box 689 , Roche t WWw,urmc.rochest 5 er, NY 14642 er,edu

THE ROCHESTER VICTORY ALLIANCE More info at: AN H IV VACCIN E IN OUR LIFETIME RochesterVictoryAlliance.org 585-756-2329 • UNIVERSITYofROCHESTER MAY 2010. NU MBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE EE VALLEY • THE E A 15

WWW.BACHELOR4M.COM 670 university Avenue - Rochester, NeW '(orl<. 14607

Dear friends, Drink up, Man Up, Join Up, Link Up ...

IN ORDER TO AVOID THESE HEADLINES: "An HN vaccine may be possible but--- only for heterosexuals .. ."

secau gay men are not volunteering for vaccine trials at the rate needed. unless more of us Why?get involved, the AIDS vaccine that gets developed may not help the gay community. Let me se

ex.plain.The good news is that a recent study known as the Thai study included 16,000 volunteers in Thailand. The results were very promising. The bad news for us is that this study was conducted almost exclusiVely @long heterO !§. If a vaccine is going to work in gay men then it needS to be tested on gay men. What ifsexua the first preventive HN vaccine waS not available to us, simply beC3 we didn't participate? We cannot alloW this possible outcome and certainly not by our

use choiceThe Rochester! victory Alliance needs more of us to get involved. They are testing a new vaccine combination and the study is limited to gay men. Will you be one of the people who steps

forward?Here's the sad truth; the URMC Rochester Victory Alliance study needs 80 ",en who have sex with ",en to enroll. With thousands of us living in this region, you'd think this would be easy, AS of today, only 10 ",en have come forward, This needs to

change.won't you join me in getting the word out and helping to recruit more guys to this effort? If you

haven't volunteered, please consider it?

Pet r Mohr Owner Bachelor Forum 16 A THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

(Shoulders from page 13) made historic contributions to the strug­ cial assistant to Gov. Gray Davis of Cali­ gle for equality for women and the LGBT fornia, serving as a liaison to women's community. Our thoughts go out to all groups. In 2003, Ms. Costanza founded those who cherished Midge," Jacobs said. the Midge Costanza Institute for the "We have all lost a dedicated champion Randlj G. Raetz, DDS Study of Politics and Public Policy, affili­ and a strong and forceful advocate for ated with the women's studies department true social justice and equality." General Dentistry for the entire community at San Diego State University In 2005 she "From her days on the City Council became a public affairs officer for the San of Rochester, NY, to the White House including bleaching and cosmetics Diego District Attorney's Office. staff, to her recent service on the staff ''I'm the first woman DA in San Diego of District Attorney Bonnie Dumanis, WE ARB NOW IN OUR NEW OmCB!!!!! because Midge paved the way," said Bon­ Midge never lost sight of her one true nie Dumanis, a former judge and now the purpose in life: to make our nation a bet­ San Diego County District Attorney, for ter place, where women are full and equal Come check out our new modern office, offering patients the whom Midge worked as a public affairs partners, not just in theory - but in every benefits of digital x-rays, intraoral cameras, and flat screen tv.s officer since 2005. "She helped me in my real aspect of our lives from the classroom judicial races. That's how we met. Midge to the boardroom to the White House. in a relaxing and enjoyable environment was just a wonder - effervescent, irrev­ She was an amazing friend to us all," erent, revered and adored by so many said Vince Hall, vice president of public people. I'm just beginning to see how affairs and communications for Planned many people she has touched through Parenthood in San Diego and Riverside the students she has worked with, politi­ Counties. cians she has worked with, attorneys she Former Rochester City Council Presi­ has worked with. It's such a big loss to dent Lois Geiss said that Midge, a strong all of us." supporter of woman's rights, "certainly Bonnie Dumanis also said that Jimmy paved the way for the rest of us and made Carter called Midge a week or so before it possible for all who followed .... She was she died. She said, "He called and told her a trailblazer." she was in his and Rosalynn's thoughts Assemblyman Joseph Morelle, and prayers and thanked her for all she D-Irondequoit, chairman of the Monroe did for the country." County Democratic Party, said, "Midge Hilary Rosen, now a Democratic Costanza became a national figure, some­ political strategist who also works with thing that local Democrats were very 2257 South Clinton Avenue the Huffington Post, was a board mem­ proud of." Mayor Robert Duffy echoed Westfall Park Medical Center ber for HRCF. Of Midge, Hilary said, the same sentiments. Rochester, NY 14618' "Midge was an LGBT rights pioneer of There is no doubt the inside game. From her high ranking that Midge Costan­ but closeted perch in the Carter White za has left her mark House, Midge created inclusion where on the political life (58'5)473-1550 none existed before. She burst out of that of Rochester and closet years later and became a wonder­ the country. Shoul­ ful firebrand - cementing her important ders To Stand On is New Patients Welcome place in LGBT history." proud and humbled Bvening Saturday appts. available "On behalf of the board of directors to recognize Midge & and staff of The San Diego LG BT Com­ Costanza as an icon munity Center, I want to express our deep Midge Costanza of liberation and Check us out on the web at www.drrandydds.com sadness at the passing of Midge Costan­ equality whose contributions will not Call for an appointment today!! za," said Dr. Delores A. Jacobs, chief be forgotten and who continues to live executive officer for The Center. "She in the hearts and minds of all those she was truly a pioneer in our movement, and touched . • MAY 2010 • NUMBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET A 17

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360 East Avenue Rochester, New York 14604 18 A THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

SCENEMAKERS OF THE MONTH: Sherwin Bethel prepares a pomegranate martini and Liza drops by at Mamooche Bistro. Gay Alliance raffles and many other events often take place at the fabulous new restaurant at the corner of East Ave. and Alexander (that round building). Photos: Susan Jordan

CASINO NIGHT: Top left/right: Jeanne Gainsberg/Michael Hardy. Above: Sue Cowell, Gay Alliance Executive Director, with Carrie Vernon and Tom Ferrarese of the Board, at 140 Alex for a March fund raiser. Photos: Laura McSpadden

NEARLY WED: The panel at the Nearly Wed Game on March 24 at the Gay Alliance Youth Center. Photo: Bess Watts

SINS OF SCRIPTURE: Rev. Jim Mulcahy, Judy Pfoltzer and Patti LaRosa at the PFLAG workshop PAW PROTESTS: Mary Ann San­ on the negative use of the Bible, ford, Pride At Work Member, at held at St. Thomas Episcopal the County contract protest on Church on April 6. Photos: Bess March 9. Photos: Bess Watts Watts

PRIDEAf TAX DAY UNHAPPY HOUR: The EqualityROC executive board - Todd Plank, Mir Buchan­ AFt-e.o an, Anne Tischer and Blanche Harling - at 140 Alex after the Tax Day protest. Photo: Bess Watts Anne Tischer at the PAW protest in defense of County workers.

ttARRIA~ EQUAL EQUAL T.. llES TAXES = EQUAL- Eq()AL IS RI6HT$ TAXEr ClVIL R'6HT

UNFAIR GAY TAX DAY: 15 people picketed at the Federal Building on April 15. Right: Judy Johnson and Steve Tucker at the protest. Photos: Bess Watts MAY 2010 • NUMBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET A 19

LlPSYNCH FOR YOUR LIFE: At RIT's drag show. Photos: Laura McSpadden

THE LATEST THING: The fabulous fashion show took place at RIT Inn COLORFEST: Top left: Geo Kartheiser and Kris Pumphrey, co-directors of RIT's Color­ on April 16. Above right: Thomas Warfield. Photos: Laura McSpadden fest 2010, at the opening ceremony. Photos: Tony Correa

ON THE AVENUE: A Manhattan Easter by Eric Bellmann 20 A THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010 SectionB ARTS, ENTERTAINMENT & COMMUNITY

The Lipstick Massacre comes to Geva on May 27 By Susan Jordan She's baaaack... Michael Steck's The Lipstick Massacre: A Murder Mystery, directed by David Henderson and produced by Method Machine, runs from May 27 to June 12 at Geva The­ atre Center, 75 Woodbury Blvd. The Lipstick Massacre is a new murder mystery play from the twisted mind of Roches­ ter's Michael Steck. Pandora Boxx stars as Daphne Von Hau­ senpfeffer, the current It Girl of local TV commercials, who quickly becomes the center of a murder investigation when her competition begins to get picked off one by one. A bumbling Bacchante (female) & female satyr: 18th c. French terracotta. detective is on the case, but he'll need the help of his erstwhile Artists view gender through the ages protege and the town's leading talent agent, Cooki McDoogle. See gender through the eyes of artists over the past 300 years at Together they work the a "Night at the Museum" sponsored by the Gay Alliance's Inqueery town of Flushing Hollow and community education program on May 27. its wacky residents to try and InQueery has arranged its first-ever session at the Memorial Art stop the rising body count. Take Gallery. The tour, "Depictions of Gender," will examine artwork from a sprinkle of greed, a dash of the past three centuries with a focus on the depiction of gender, gender boozy cougars, a pinch of sexual roles and gender expressions. exploits and one nun, shake it all The tour will cost $5 (free for current MAG members) and is limit­ up and you have all the ingredi­ ed to only 10 people, so pre-registration is required. For more informa­ ents you'll need to crack the case tion, look for InQueery under the Education tab at www.gayalliance. of The Lipstick Massacre! org or call 244-8640 ext 20 . • Michael Steck is a writer, entertainer and filmmaker, best known for his drag persona Pan­ dora Boxx. Method Machine's Five Dates. Five Restaurants. production of The Lipstick Mas­ In the game of love, everyone sacre comes hot on the stilet­ deserves a shot. Three actors to heels of Pandora's stint on play 15 characters whose amo­ RuPauls's Drag Race. Widely rous combinations are played touted as the "funny queen," out in this high-energy, madcap, Pandora wowed the judges with David Henderson and Michael Steck. Photo: Susan Jordan musical comedy. Gregg Coffin's her witty banter and creative music ingeniously ranges from solutions for the show's campy Massacre, as well as provoca­ tion of The Laramie Project: 10 pop and country, to a German challenges. Her Carol Chan­ tive art exhibits like ''A Tibetan Years Later in June will benefit cabaret and a 1950s doo-wop to ning was an instant viral video Pilgrimage" and "Bushwacked!." Rochester Pride. Motown and more. A feast for and RuPaul called her the Susan The Lipstick Massacre exempli­ David Henderson and the eyes and ears indeed! Lucci of the competition. fies Method Machine's desire to Michael Steck talked with The Gregg Coffin's musical about "Pandora is the funniest per­ develop and foster new plays and Empty Closet recently about the love and food with a little dash of son I know," says Artistic Direc­ playwrights. play (and Michael's experience Cupid thrown in for good mea­ tor David Henderson. ''And so The play features Marcy ]. on RuPaul's Drag Race). sure, was first workshopped at is Michael. We are ecstatic to Savastano (called by the Demo­ Geva and MuCCC are very Geva in October 2003. It capti­ be working with Geva to bring crat & Chronicle the "It Girl" different spaces, so the new pro­ vated the hearts of Rochesterians what Entertainment Weekly calls of Rochester alternative theatre), duction has gone through some with its first production in the 'a master of comedy' to this Michael Francis O'Connor and changes. David Henderson said, Nextstage in the spring of 2004, venue. " Jamal Abdunnasir ("a comic "We have something really good, with the Democrat and Chron­ The Lipstick Massacre pre­ bonanza," City Newspaper). Per­ and we're trying to bump it up. icle extolling Coffin's "mastery miered in November at MuCCC formances begin May 27 and Geva is a much bigger space and Gregg Coffin of music in many styles" and to sold out audiences and rave run through June 12 in the also many more people will see "his wickedly funny lyrics." City reviews. Nextstage at Geva Theatre Cen­ it there. We have more room for Newspaper proclaimed the show Method Machine is an artis­ ter as part of Spring Fest 2010. furniture. The sets will probably Geva, Gay Alliance "a compositional tour-de-force tic playground committed to Tickets are $20 and can be change the most." offer night out at of clever writing." producing and presenting dar­ obtained through the Geva The­ Michael Steck added, "The Five Course Love In October of 2005, the ing, relevant and illuminating atre Center box office. Reserva­ script has changed too. It has show opened at the Minetta experiments in performance and tions can be made at 232-Geva been re-arranged; some things The Gay Alliance and Lane Theatre in New York, pro­ art. Founded in 2007, Method or via the website: www.geva­ have been shortened, and some InQueery join Geva Theatre for duced by Geva Theatre Center Machine has presented such hits theatre.org. of it is funnier!" a night out at the hit show by and Five Course Love Compa­ as Closer, Edge and The Lipstick A Method Machine produc- David said, "We polished gay playwright Gregg Coffin, ny LLC. Of its Off-Broadway some of the relationships so now Five Course Love, on Thursday, production, the New York Post the comedy is more related to May 6. declared it "a fun feast for audi­ the characters." The show starts at 7:30 p.m., ences," and the Herald called it Michael noted that after per­ with a private reception and pre­ "a zany, new feel-good musical forming the play four times, it show discussion starting at 6:30. spoof that will have you calling became easier to see what works The Gay Alliance is offering a for seconds." An original cast and what needs to be cut. For special discount for this perfor­ album was released in November instance, some of Daphne's less mance only. of 2009 by leading musical the­ successful jokes have been cut, Tickets include a pre­ atre label Sh-K-Boom/Ghostlight Michael said. "I tailored the part show reception with light hors Records and is available at iTunes, (of Daphne) to me, and it worked d'oeuvres, and are just $36. Amazon and Playbill. com, Barnes out better." David added, "It These tickets are ONLY avail­ and Noble, Borders and many plays more well-rounded now, able for purchase Monday-Fri­ more outlets. since some of the characters are day through Colleen Brown, California-based Coffin more fleshed out." and NOT through the Box is an Associate Artist at Geva. Is comedy harder than trag­ Office. For more information His musicals Convenience (which edy? Is it harder to make people or to order tickets, contact Col­ had its world premiere at Geva), laugh than cry? The two had leen Brown at 585-232-1366 ext. rightnextto me, The Snow Queen, different opinions. 3057 or e-mail to cbrown@geva­ East of the Sun/West of the Moon, Michael said, "For me, com­ theatre.org . • (Geva continues page 3) (Lipstick continues page 3) 2 B THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

ZE: There's nothing like a little life experience to make you a better writer. I think that one of the reasons it took me so long to start is that I needed to have something to write about! My Masters in Psychology also helped a lot - giving me more clarity about character motiva­ tion, relationship dynamics, the interplay Book Review: or schmoozing and socializing, Rita is a between verbal and non-verbal commu­ AN INTERVIEW WITH Z faux-lesbian cougar who seems to have nication, etc. My own experience grow­ EGLOFF, AUTHOR OF VERGE developed manipulating others into an ing up queer and my process of coming art form. out have also made a huge contribution By Laura McSpadden And Sister Hillary. What can we to my work. Verge by Z Egloff. Paperback: 280 say about Sister Hillary, except that she EC: What keeps you going when it pages; Bywater Books, 2009 is undeniably an unsuitable mate for gets difficult: e.g., when the words don't Verge is not your typical lesbian love Claire ... if only she weren't so sexy, intel­ seem to come together, or if/when the story. It is a well-written, quirky and ligent and compassionate. But what sort pragmatics of life make sitting down to unequivocally enjoyable read, driven for­ of future could a young, sex-driven recov­ write a challenge? Why do you keep writ­ ward by its eccentric cast of characters. ering alcoholic hope to share with a nun? ing? For instance, there is Claire. Claire I guess you'll have to read the book to ZE: I'm an extremely disciplined writ­ serves as the protagonist of this tale. She discover the answer to that one. er. It makes me feel really good and really is a twenty-something film student who Verge is written in an accessible, happy to sit down every morning and happens to be in her first year of sobriety. friendly and refreshingly sincere voice. write. Even if I'm in a bad mood, or hap­ She got herself into a bit of a pickle by The book is replete with poetic turns­ pen to think I suck as a writer that day, sleeping with her professor's wife, Rita; of-phrase that make it a delight to read I just keep writing. I also keep a journal the consequence of this dalliance is that each and every sentence. The pace of the strictly platonic relationship throughout of inspiring quotes from other writers she is denied access to the school's equip­ story moves along perfectly, allowing the the novel. The minute I started writing, and artists - that helps a lot too. And I ment, and is left to worry about how she reader to get carried away with the pleas­ however, the energy between them start­ have a good posse of friends to keep me will be able to finish her final project. antly chaotic joys and struggles of Claire ed to get frisky. It was a surprise, but in a encouraged. Claire is in love with a nun (excuse me, on her journey towards happiness, health, good way. I think it makes the book more EC: You mention on your website that I mean a woman religious) named Sister freedom and love. you have a gender-flexible presentation. interesting. Plus I love it when characters Hillary. The first novel by Z Egloff, Verge has Do you have preferred pronouns? Do you surprise me like that. And then there's Shelly, formerly recently been nominated for a Lambda feel that your gender identity and pre­ EC: Why was it important to you to Claire's lover, now her best friend. Shelly Literary Award in the Lesbian Debut sentation have influenced/informed your write a novel that featured so many queer has a sister who may-or-may-not want Fiction category. If you are looking for a writing in any way? to sleep with Claire and a mother who light but thoughtful read, I strongly rec­ characters? ZE: I'm okay with "she" to describe may-or-may-not -be sleeping with Claire's ommend that you pick up a copy of Verge. ZE: My impetus to write came out of myself, though I often get "he" from mother. Oh, dear. An interview with Z Egloff a desire to tell stories about queer lives. people who don't know me. The "he" Enter Max, Claire's AA sponsor. Max Empty Closet: What was the biggest Despite the rise of queer visibility in gen­ used to bother me until I embraced my is a wisecracking, deep-thinking charac­ surprise you encountered in the writing eral, we're still marginalized in many genderqueer status. Now I like it. When ter who does an excellent job of calling of the novel? I.e., did any of the characters ways, including in literature. In the U.K., people get apologetic about it, I tell them Claire on her shit. He still grieves for his or plot elements take you somewhere you for example, several lesbian writers have "No worries." partner Bert, who died four years previ­ didn't plan on? had huge mainstream success. Not so in As far as my writing, I haven't yet ously. Z Egloff: I'm an outliner, which means the U.S. At least not yet! explored transgender issues as much as And, of course, you can't have a story I spend months brainstorming, and then EC: I understand that you started I'd like to. Claire in Verge has a little gen­ without a good villain (as if Claire's own I write according to the outline I come up writing seriously only relatively recently. derqueer stuff going on, but it's not a big shenanigans don't provide enough drama with. This is not to say that changes don't How do you feel that your experiences part of the book. I have a first draft of to keep a plot moving along!). This is occur when I'm writing, and Verge was no previous to your decision to commit to an upcoming novel with a transgender where Rita, the professor's wife, comes exception to this. I had originally planned writing have been most useful to you as character, and I expect there will be more in. Whether on stage, behind a camera, for Claire and her friend Shelly to have a an author? exploration on this topic in the future . •

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(Lipstick continued from page 1) denly people went crazy and wanted my edy is easier because it's what I've always autograph. We'd go out to a bar and I'd done. But the other side is that in comedy, get recognized." if they're not laughing it's quite clear. In He added, "RuPaul is really nice." drama they're silent so you don't know." David said, "It was interesting seeing Just over 1 hour from Rochester David countered, "Comedy is a science the impact Michael and Pandora had on in Western New York Stote! and drama is an 'art'. Comedy is harder people here. I went to Tilt (for screenings because of all the variables, like the heat of the show) and even lip-synched for my Jones Pond is a members only, adult in the theatre can distract the audience. life - but I didn't win. male (21+), gay camping facility Also the timing has to be done perfectly "I want to get people from out of town with clothing optional areas on 117 - how you land a joke has to be just right. to come to Rochester and see the play," he acres. Large RV £ Tent Sites, Cabins continued. "You can read it but seeing it I find it harder. This is actually Method and Guest House. DJ/dancing every Machine's first big comedy production. is a whole different thing." weekend, hiking, swimming and social It was also the first play we've ever work­ The Lipstick Massacre will be per­ shopped from page to stage." formed on Thursday, May 27 at 7 p.m.; events out the wazoo. Call or visit our Writers sometimes have a hard time Friday, May 28 at 7 p.m.; Saturday, May web site for directions and the event collaborating in theatre, and seeing their 29 at 3 p.m. and 7 p.m.; Sunday, May schedule. See ya there! work altered. Michael admitted, "It was 30 at 7 p.m.; Wednesday, June 2 at 7 hard at first because I really wanted it to p.m.; Saturday, June 5 at 3 p.m. and 7 585-567-8100 be exactly as written. I tried to re-write p.m.; Sunday, June 6 at 7 p.m.; Thurs­ during rehearsals - during scenes I was in day, June 10 at 7 p.m.; Friday, June 11 at JonesPond.com - and David didn't really want me to do 7 p.m. and Saturday, June 12 at 3 p.m. that! So then I let go a little." and 7 p.m . • David paid tribute to the cast, "that wonderful bunch of creative, talented people. We're really looking forward to having it at Geva. This would be the (Geva continued from page 1) first stage to moving it on. The next step The Daly News, Cinderella, The Caucasian would be taking it to another city - like Chalk Circle and over 75 incidental scores San Francisco. But it's a big cast to tour have been performed Off-Broadway and Geri Stanton with - 11 people. It's a lot of people to throughout the U.S., Canada and South Counseling Services NYS Licensed Mental Health Counselor move around and to pay. So that will be Korea. Sign Language Skilled a challenge." The cast features Broadway stalwarts Drag backlash Troy Britton Johnson (The Drowsy Chaper­ Michael has received some national one, Will Rogers Follies and Damn Yankees), attention for his stint on RuPaul's Drag Kevin Ligon (The Producers, Young Franken­ Race, such as being on the cover of Enter­ stein, Finian's Rainbow) and Kristen Men­ tainment Weekly. He said, "When I was gelkoch (Forbidden Broadway). Brad Greer Individual • Couple • Group killed off! was angry and sad. That was the and Jessica Vosk complete the ensemble. first challenge I had felt good about. I was Five Course Love is directed by Mark also partially relieved, because it was hard. Cuddy. The design team includes Adam Every day we worked from 9 a.m. to 10 or Koch (scenic design), Devon Painter (costume 11 at night... Then the backlash started design) and Robert Wierzel (lighting design), - all the e-mails and blogs started com­ designers of last year's stunning production ing in about how people were outraged. of Sweeney Todd; and Danny Erdberg (sound Entertainment Weekly said it was the worst design). Peggy Hickey will choreograph and elimination. So I was happy because I got musical director is Don Kot. more attention than if I had won. Five Course Love is co-produced by Enter­ "It's been exciting. I was in L.A. for a com, ESL Federal Credit Union, Max of month and no one knew me - but sud- Eastman Place and Oppenheimer Funds . •

EMPIRE STATE @ PRIDE AGENDA

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To purchase tickets, sponsorships or journal advertisements, or for more information, visit www.prideagenda.org or call 212-627-0305. 4 B THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

SERVING ROCHESTER'S

tant principles. Did you know that there is "salt" in the bones of meat? Therefore creating stocks using pork, beef, veal and chicken bones is a great additive to your menu. Into the kitchen! I had joined the class on Day Two and the menu for Team Two was Grilled Tuna with Spring Herb Salad and Marinated Tomatoes; Fedelini with Broccoli Rabe, Pancetta, Parmesan, and 35 Year Landmafi Toasted Crumbs; Braised Belgian Endive; and Chianti Granita. To add to the "healthy" we were also in the (jay CommunitJ making two dressings. One was a Control Recipe of Port Wine Vinaigrette with the healthy variation of a Reduced-Fat Port Wine Vinaigrette. The Control Recipe consisted of bal­ 1farr~~(~~~1tf~-8ym samic vinegar, red wine vinegar, salt, dry mustard, sugar, ground black pepper, extra-virgin olive oil, chopped chervil, ~ chopped parsley and chopped chives. The $2 Coors Lite r:Bottfes healthy variation used arrowroot, chicken stock, balsamic vinegar, extra-virgin olive 2 for 1 We((, dnift beer & Pree Pizza 9ym-2am oil, chopped basil and half the amount of salt. With the healthy variation you have Merle and "Chefski" to first boil and cool the stock that is ~1USIfay thickened with arrowroot. Boot Camp at the CIA One group had a "fried chicken" varia­ $2 r:Bud/r:Bud Lite r:Bottfes 9ym-2am tion. The sauce was compiled of arrow­ §uest r:Bartenders - 2nd rfuesday 1 the Month By Merle Exit root, chicken stock, evaporated skim Hyde Park's Culinary Institute of milk, Dijon mustard, honey and ground America (CIA) offers "Boot Camps" black pepper. Rather than using a cut where you spend time learning how to up whole chicken, boneless and skinless w~nesday cook. You don't have to be a chef to do chicken breasts were substituted. They this, as there are both instructors for the $3 r:Bomb Shots 1Oym-2am were basically covered with finely ground course and student chefs to assist you in panko, chopped parsley, tarragon, basil, the kitchen. chives and buttermilk vs. flour, eggs, The subject of my course was Healthy milk, bread crumbs and oil. IThUniay Cooking. Although it was a four-day That same "chicken" group turned 2 event, I spent one day at Boot Camp, on 3 for and Pree Pizza 1Oym-2am recipes for Wild Mushroom and Goat day two. Cheese Strudel, Fennel Braised in Char­ I met the other students the evening before, during dinner at St. Andrew's donnay and Stewed Chickpeas with Tomatoes, Zucchini and Cilantro. Pf#ay Cafe, one of the restaurants at the CIA. Another group was given Cioppino $3 ~LL rnrinks, $1.50 ~LL r:Beer Each one had their own story for being there, coming from different parts of the with Garlic Croutons with the following 10ym - Midni[Jht country and some as family members. ingredients: olive oil, diced onion, diced I was first given my "scrubs" so to fennel, diced green onions, diced green speak ... jacket, pants (with stretch waist­ bell peppers, minced garlic, tomato con­ band), hat and neckerchief. Actually it casse, tomato puree, dry white wine, bay Satu~ was Chef Skibitcky who attached my leaf, cherrystone clams, lobster (first cut $3 Skyy - ~(( P(avors 1Oym-2am neckerchief and the mom of the two­ up and disjointed), crushed black pepper­ member team that I joined that made sure corns, deveined shrimp, cubed swordfish, I looked OK. I had no idea that any of the and chopped basil. Needless to say there class members were simply cooks at home. was much preparation time on this one. Su~ Naturally, I brought Esther, my rubber Oh yeah, the crouton garnish consisted 2 for 1 We((, drcift beer 1Oym-2am chicken, to the classroom and introduced of wholewheat baguette, vegetable spray, her to Chef "Ski" as everyone referred to minced garlic and a saffron aioli of nine him. He got back at me by constantly ingredients. StarH"8 referring to the gelato tasting that was "Chefski" cut up the protein and gave ~ 12th done the day before. There was no gelato us demonstrations on how to cut up a ~very Wednesday is Steak %[Jht ~m - 10ym at any of the campus restaurants. Yes, it's chicken into eight equal pieces, how to cut a healthier way of eating ice cream, as the up a live lobster for the cioppino and how milk fat is limited to the milk vs. cream. to prepare a polenta souffle. One-year 35th 2lnnMrm"l Cerebration Back to the classroom with a discus­ students were assigned to work with each sion on the seven principles of Healthy team as well as retrieving ingredients that june 4th, 5th & 6th Cooking. were not as yet in the kitchen. 1. Select ingredients with care - design There was no "Gordon Ramsey" menus to include a large variety of ingre­ screaming, but only letting us know how Customer~ dients, emphasize high-quality ingredi­ much time we had left before the lunch ents, use fresh, seasonal produce when serving. Once the menu items were com­ Saturday, june 5th Oyen at 2ym reasonable. pleted, the boot camp folks placed them Oyen r:Bar - We(( rnrinks & rnrcift 2. Store and prepare all foods with the on makeshift tables and in the form of aim of preserving their best possible fla­ a buffet. We all got to sample everyone's ~m-;ym and 1Oym-l~m vor, texture, color and overall nutritional toils and creations. value. The results? Honestly, the food tasted 3. Incorporate a variety of plant-based as if it came off the menu of one of the ~ n~ht gnat PrlzMll dishes on the menu in all categories. CIA restaurants. Each dish was plated everv - 4. Manage the amount of fat used perfectly and at the correct temperature (rnetaiTs to be yosted in bar) both as an ingredient and as part of a and you would never know that they were preparation of cooking technique. "healthy" choices. 5. Serve appropriate portions of food. You can take a two-day boot camp SERVING ROCHESTER'S The Avenue Pub SERVING ROCHESTER'S 6. Offer a variety of beverages that on BBQ, The "best" of, Holiday Hors compliment the food. d'Oeuvres and Skill Development. If you 522 Monroe ~venue 7. Use salt with care and purpose - want to go all the way (there are three-day 585-244-4960 explore a variety of seasonings, prepara­ and four-day), spend five days. You can tion methods and cooking techniques to opt for Asian, French, Gourmet and Med­ reduce reliance on salt. iterranean, to name a few. Check them all The last was one of the most imp or- out on www.ciachef.edu . • MAY 2010 • NUMBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET B 5

ing sites for their soon-to-return beloveds. that lead. Verified that #3 had not gone The harbingers of spring used to be on a walk into the phone-eating park. robins. In my grammar school days, it Detective dd's relentless search con­ was the hop, hop, hopping robin who tinued. She perambulated the perimeter. Columnists told me that spring had arrived. That Perused bushes. Paid particular atten­ The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other and a fluid-dampened ditto my teacher tion to pots. Ah ha. The pull-it-to-the­ put on my desk. Between the purple out­ road-dumpster. Opened the cover. Pushed contributing writers are their own and do not necessarily reflect line of the robin, I diligently filled in redial. Heard singing. Untied a bag. the collective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley his puffy breast, my red crayon moving Recovered #3. or The Empty Closet. methodically. Crayola, not nature, select­ But the crime was still not solved. ed the shade for my robin. That was okay. Who ditched #3? Detective dd was deter­ Growing Up rewarding period of his life. He answered Mommy loved my robin anyway. mined to discover the perp. The grill­ people's questions about his choice of In addition to Mother Nature's ing continued. "Where were you when EULOGY: FIRST DRAFT destinations by quoting Jan Morris, the Springs, there are Love's Springs. A Per­ you made your last call?" My answer: By Eric Bellmann travel writer, who wrote, "Strange people sonal Spring that makes all things become seated at my nicely polished desk. "Then Eric made lists. go to strange places so they won't feel so vibrantly colored. Makes me smile like a what?" My answer: I left the house alone. Each morning strange." He loved his time in the Middle toothpaste ad. Makes my heart trill like a Approximately 22 minutes and 33.44 sec­ he made a list of East. He grew passionate about immi­ forestful of singing birds. onds later, Roxanne showed-up in a gray things he intended grants and minorities. In 2001, falling in love with my dd van. She cleaned. Emptied the wastebas­ to accomplish that Eric never had great luck with roman­ precipitated a Personal Spring. I developed ket next to my desk. Knotted the bag. day. tic relationships. The heartache that he a strong need to run through a park, hug­ Dumped the bag. The bag that contained He found satis­ encountered eventually came to be under­ ging trees and loving grass blades. Mirac­ #3. faction in checking stood as evidence of the capacity to take ulously, my Spring returns every time I The culprit? Not that person of inter­ off various tasks as risks and proof of his ability to love. His see her smile. est. Oh no. It was him. He has a prior the day progressed. To add to his sense thoughtful therapist told him the shots Then there are times that a Personal record for pushing things off high places. of achievement, he would list items like you miss for sure are the ones you don't Spring finds me unawares. Like the day He likes to watch them fall. Frankie the "floss teeth," "change bed linens;" things take. All things considered, he had no our red puppy, Vegas, bounced towards guilty kitty. Frankie Cecil, the butter­ he'd do anyway. He would then feel not complaints. us, ready to adopt us the moment he scotch yellow prankster who just brought quite so disappointed when he failed to Some scattered takes on Eric would sniffed our faces. Dog? Hey, I'm a cat per­ us another Personal Spring. deal with a more challenging issue, like include telling people that his heroes were son. A lick on my hand. SPRING time. Now our four cats and one dog need "call cell phone company" or "book air­ independent thinkers like Gloria Steinem, Then there are the times when a Per­ to watch out our window. Need to watch line tickets". For a long time Eric used Joan Baez, Mary McCarthy, Colette. He sonal Spring arrives in the darkest hours. Spring. Need to watch as willows stretch accomplishments as the measure of his joked that if The New Yorker or The New One Personal Spring came creeping out out their branches, as the forsythia begins value. York Times ceased publication, he'd curl of the woods just days after dd's "baby to shout, and goldfinches race with them Eric's shameful secret, about which up and die. He loved cats. He was for­ brother" suffered a horrendous motorcycle to see who can flaunt their yellow first. he often complained, was that he felt tunate to have known his grandmother accident. Now we all have another Personal Spring. incompetent. People didn't believe that and one aunt, both of whom had lived Quietly crying, dd came into the MeredithElizabethReiniger@Jrontier­ this could really be true, since his life through the firebombing of Dresden, house. "We need to catch that kitten. net. net was marked by considerable achievement. which he visited with his sister several There's something wrong with her. We Nonetheless, he knew he was easily over­ years before she died. need to take her to the vets." The kitten's A Few Bricks Short whelmed and consequently easily irritat­ If a eulogy needs to list accomplish­ bones were visible under her gray skin. She AN INSIDIOUS SISSY ed. It was some relief, later in life, when ments, Eric might want you to know that was shaved neck to tail. And starving. he relaxed a bit over his strong capacity once he saved someone's life by phoning Spousewomyn, with her Dr. Doolittle By David Hull to overreact. 911 after a friend had taken sleeping pills. gene, easily persuaded "Patch" to accept Spring is in the Reared as a single child (his only sib­ But at this point the writer has begun to petting. Food and water. A bed in the air. Sunshine is ling, a sister, was fifteen years older), drift into reporting what he did, not who sun; a bed in the shade. All the while our beaming. Birds are he had the capacity for being comfort­ he was. two cats watched Patch through the slid­ singing. Flowers are able alone. Many of his interests - film, This essay is the result of a sugges­ ing door. And every day Patch pressed her blooming. And the needlepoint, travel - required no com­ tion from the pastor of the First Unitarian silky black face against the glass, purring Republican Party panionship. On the occasions when he Universalist Church of Rochester, who pleadingly. has revealed my had to work in committees or on teams, encouraged the venture as a method of Meanwhile, I tried to find a good well-kept secret! he found the experiences frustrating. He self-assessment with a goal of identifying home for Patch. Of course, we didn't need And my secret was never developed much tolerance for the goals and values in pursuit of living a bet­ another animal. But quickly I learned that so closeted that even I didn't know about foibles of others. ter life. We'll see. July is a major birthing time for cats. No it, but apparently it's true. No, not that Eric allowed as he did not much like E-mail:ELBCAD@RITEDU room at the inn. Only euthanasia. I'm gay; everybody knows that! individual people, yet he delighted in When dd came back from the vets, It's my other secret. All the evidence engaging strangers. He viewed this inter­ I handed her a manila folder. "What's needed to convict me is there -- I voted for est in striking up casual conversations as a Cleaning My Closet this?" she inquired. Read the tab, I said. Obama. I supported Health Care Reform. strategy for "being here now," which was SPRING INSINUATIONS All our pets have their own folder. That's I'm pro-choice. So obviously, I'm a Social­ an attempt to put his grasp of Buddhism how Patch moved out of the woods. That's ist Nazi who hates America -- at least, into practice. And through his entire life By Meredith how Apache Summerwoods moved into according to the Republicans. he was committed to equality and social Elizabeth Reiniger our home. I guess this whole paying my taxes, justice. He always favored the underdog, COMING "Serendipity," my sister explained, voting, volunteering in the community whether it was a soccer team or a political ATTRACTIONS: "you two need that kitten in your life and celebrating Independence Day every faction. He liked the idea of revolution. Spring is sprung, right now." Then I understood that we July 4th was all a cover. Yes, I'm an insidi­ For an atheist, which is how he finally the grass is rizz, I had received a Personal Spring. Our sad­ ous sissy. identified himself, Eric had considered a wonder where the dened hearts could begin to sing again. A Socialist Nazi who hates America! number of spiritual disciplines over his tulips is. That mes­ Such a time I accidentally fell in love Who do these people think they are? Peo­ lifetime. Raised in a conservative Prot­ sage was posted on once more. While waiting for Vegas' vet, ple like Rush Limbaugh (he must eat a big estant faith, his early awareness of his the large sign in dd wandered over to a small crate sit­ bowl of stupid every morning for break­ homosexuality contributed to a deep sense front of the Starlite Drive-In every May. ting in the corner of the bench. "OH! fast) and Sarah Palin (in our house we of alienation. He drifted away from the If the Drive-In still existed, this year Come see the kitten." I remained seated, call her Caribou Barbie) and Glenn Beck faith of his childhood. He considered they would have been forced to amend far away. I don't need to see a kitten, I (as a commentator he makes an extremely Catholicism briefly but ultimately found their announcements. Spring sprang explained. "OH! OH! Come see Vegas. funny comedian -- except I'm laughing more spiritual consolation in alcohol. sooner. How would they rhyme the fact They are nose to nose." Really, I insisted, at him, not with him). Are these yahoos Recovery at 40, concurrent with the bur­ that this year's March had days of 78 I can imagine it from here. "OH, OH, for real? geoning gay rights movement, established degree sun that popped my crocuses right OH ... please, just one second." All the Republican senators and con­ an entirely new life view. He cleaned up out of their beds? We have three cats and a dog, I gressmen are "pro-life" and they refuse to his act. He was out both socially and pro­ What quirky spellings would explain reminded her as I walked over to the have any federal money available for abor­ fessionally. that an April day of 87 degrees quickly butterscotch kitten. Oh, oh, oh. Love tion. However, I'll bet their own health Eric harbored a vague romantic nos­ brought the yellow and purple and white at first sight. I kept that to myself. On care coverage, paid for by taxpayers, cov­ talgia for the early days of gay life when crocuses to the ground? How to explain the ride home, I heard "I know we don't ers abortions. And how many of those it was covert, secretive. He felt fortu­ that those flowers, too weary to celebrate, need a fourth cat, but ...." What exactly old, gray, dried-up male senators have nate that he'd known gay life before the rested their fading colors on the brown is "need"? ever been pregnant? Let's face it - if men plague. He'd lost two of his best friends soil? I need my cell phone. Really need. Fri­ got pregnant, abortion would not only be early on, before treatment, men he missed I love spring sunshine. It's like open­ day it was not where it should have been, legal; it would be free! for the rest of his days. ing a present, the present you really, really could have been, might have been. What is the platform of the Tea Party Once, in a sour frame of mind, he'd wanted. Spring sun shines its spotlight on Cleverly I used dd's cell phone to Movement? So far I understand they're snarled at the God he didn't believe in, clues that announce the true beginning call my missing phone. To redial, redial, against Obama, they're against Health "Thanks a lot!" and in a flash his sarcasm of the season. Maple buds sprinkling red redial, knowing that it, like my cats, just Care, they're against gay marriage, they're vanished. Thanks a lot indeed; he'd lived dots across my sky view. Drooping catkins might not come when it is called. against abortion, but what are they for? twice as long as his lost friends. Life was swaying their tender greenness. Bulging Indeed, no jaunty ring responded. I Why don't those people just say what the a gift. That everything that happens is a buds that peek-a-boo their colors. searched. Every room, every closet, every real problem is for them - they don't want gift was a radical reversal of his thinking. This year the coming attractions pocket. Fruitless. a black guy for President! He shifted from what was wrong with the included a bird flying low, a 14-inch stick Desperate, I confessed to dd that I had So, believing that all Americans should picture to what was right with the picture. in her beak, her nesting material about apparently lost phone #3. She recognized be able to have health care coverage makes He lightened up. twice the length of her body. Another: the a damsel in distress. She summoned all me a Socialist Nazi who hates America? For a timid person, Eric took risks. He people in Abbott's Custard were washing the skills she gained by faithfully watch­ Wait until they find out I think all Amer­ dove into therapy, went to men's work­ windows. CLOSED FOR THE SEA­ ing "CSI". icans should have food and shelter too! I shops. He went to exotic places often SON was gone. Next the red-winged She contacted my last incoming caller am an insidious sissy, indeed. for extended periods of time. This was a blackbirds arrived, busily preparing nest- to ascertain a time frame. She followed To me, those extremist Republicans 6 B THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010 are just acting like a bunch of sore losers. a Socialist Nazi who hates America, but I guide judicial decision-making." progressive nominee. I guess we liberals If you don't play by their rules, they are am pretty sure it makes me one very insid­ What the hell is Sessions talking will just have to sit tight for a while and just going to take their marbles and go ious sissy, that's for sure! about? In case he hasn't heard, Sotomayor keep our fingers crossed. Between you home - unfortunately, most of them seem You can contact David at David­ was confirmed by a 61 to 38 vote, that's and me, I'm still waiting for that change I to have lost their marbles a long time ago. hull59@aol. com hardly rejection of Obama's pick. can believe in. The United States military has finally Utah Sen. Orrin Hatch, another senior agreed to consider eliminating the Don't Conundrums Republican on the Judiciary Committee, Beyond the Binary Ask, Don't Tell policy, although what a warned in a statement that "someone who surprise - the Republicans are against that CONSERVATIVES ALREADY would be an activist judge, who would TRANS INVISIBILITY IN THE too! The United States now allows con­ HYPERVENTILATING OVER substitute their own views for what the QUEER COMMUNITY victed criminals to serve in the military, law requires, is not qualified to serve on but it is going to take a "government think NEXT SUPREME COURT the federal bench." By Laura tank" 24 months to evaluate the effects NOMINEE But true to the Republican spirit McSpadden of eliminating Don't Ask, Don't Tell. In (and Republican double standards), that As you, kind March a veterans' survey was released By Ove Overmyer is exactly what happened when Dubya reader, may already Supreme Court which stated that troops report being appointed Judge Samuel Alito and Chief be aware, March 31 comfortable with gays serving openly in Justice John Paul Justice John Roberts. was the First Annu­ Stevens was unani­ the military by three to one. If you're in a Mitch McConnell, the Senate Minor­ al International combat zone, who would you rather have mously confirmed ity Leader from Kentucky, said in a Transgender Day by the Senate in guarding your back - a gay guy who will­ statement, ''As we await the President's of Visibility. This is ingly wants to serve his country or a con­ 1975, just 19 days nominee to replace Justice Stevens at the an event that will after he was nomi­ victed criminal who joined up to get out end of his term, Americans can expect hopefully recur annually, and it really got nated. His succes­ of prison early? Senate Republicans to make a sustained me thinking. sor can expect a far And what is going on with the Catho­ and vigorous case for judicial restraint and Greater trans visibility is so sorely and lic Church? I was raised Catholic (which more arduous confirmation process. the fundamental importance of an even­ desperately needed. And, no, I am not just President Obama's choice to replace is most likely the reason I'm so screwed handed reading of the law." Other Repub­ referring to the lack of visibility of trans him will be one of the most important up), so I guess I'm not all that surprised, lican gasbags have weighed in with similar identities within straight communities. decisions he'll ever make in our lifetimes. but millions of Catholics are following the warnings as well. Although the invalidation of my gender­ That's because, right now, the current leadership of the Pope - a man who looks Some observers say no matter whom queerness (and the gender identities of Supreme Court is packed with right-wing like a dehydrated version of a Chucky doll the candidate is, the party of "NO" will others) from heteronormative culture is in drag. Republican appointments. The Court is give Obama a hard time. However, vari­ painful, it is not entirely unexpected. threatening our democracy by dramati­ One elderly man in a castle in Rome is ous news reports are also suggesting the What is more hurtful, frustrating and cally expanding the power of big corpora­ making all the moral and religious deci­ President may choose one of two women saddening to me is the invalidation of my tions and conservatives would like to keep sions for millions of people around the to replace Judge Stevens. The names gender identity by people within queer the status quo. world and they're not allowed to question of Seventh Circuit Federal Judge Diane communities. Unfortunately, it happens For instance, earlier this year in the anything because supposedly the Pope's Wood and Solicitor General Elena Kagan way more frequently than you might infallible information comes directly from case known as Citizens United, they are the names of the candidates, while expect. decided that corporations have the right God. Please, if the Pope was working so Washington, D.C. Circuit Judge Merrick For instance: a few weeks ago, my to spend unlimited amounts of money to closely with God, don't you think he'd Garland is a strong candidate as well. fiance/fiancee and I were out at 140 Alex influence elections. If corporations have have better hats? If anybody is working Kagan is former dean of Harvard Law Bar and Grill, enjoying an evening out more influence, they're going to contin­ hand-in-hand with God, I'd have to say School. She has represented the United with each other. We struck up a conversa­ ue to rig the system to create even larger it's RuPaul - that queen knows how to States in the Supreme Court. She's a very tion with a cute gay couple about fashion accessorize in a way that's absolutely heav­ profits for their CEOs at the expense of qualified candidate with sparkling cre­ and dancing, and before long we knew we taxpayers, labor unions, environmentalists enly! dentials. And some conservatives may had made some new friends. and civil rights advocates. And when the Pope gets caught in the support her because she hired a lot of con­ And yet ... President Obama should be looking church pedophile cover-up scandal, he servatives at Harvard. Could this be an Before long, they referred to us as a les­ for a Supreme Court nominee who will claims it is all just a plot being organized easy out for Obama? bian couple. No big deal, it happens fairly affect the Court in a very strategic way. by the gays, with the help of Satan, to But maybe, just maybe, Obama might often when we meet people. We kindly overthrow the Catholic Church? But don't Even the president has talked about how want to duke it out with congressional and gently informed them that we are a the Court is out of touch with everyday worry, the Pope tells his faithful flock, Republicans after all and go for a more trans couple, and that neither of us identi- the Chief Vatican Exorcist (I never even Americans. We saw him take a swipe at the Supreme Court in the State of the knew that job existed) has sensed the pres­ Union address back in January. This gives ence of Satan in Vatican City! They plan me some hope I can hang my hat on. to cleverly catch the possessed individual While Mr. Obama's first nominee to because they claim that anyone possessed the Court, Justice Sonia Sotomayor, was by Satan will reveal themselves by vomit­ largely political, the president should still ing shards of glass. And I thought the plot think about how this nominee and the of The DaVinci Code was convoluted. new justice would affect the social balance With stories like those, I hardly think and dynamics of the Supreme Court. the Catholic Church needs to worry about While Stevens' retirement has been being overthrown by the gays. By now any expected for several months, the timing member with half a brain would obviously of his announcement was somewhat pre­ be running away from the Church laugh­ mature. It set off a firestorm of right-wing ing all the way. Oh, I am such an insidi­ rhetoric about what is to come. ous sissy. So, let's review. I am in support of all Alabama Sen. Jeff Sessions, the top Americans having affordable health care. Republican on the Senate Judiciary Com­ mittee, voted against Sotomayor. In a I support gays in the military. Since there statement, he warned the president of the is zero chance that I'll ever get pregnant, lessons learned from Sotomayor's confir­ I really believe choices like that should be mation. left to the individual who does get preg­ Sessions called Sotomayor's confirma­ nant. And I feel that Catholics around tion "The rejection of President Obama's the world should be able to have indepen­ empathy standard, the flawed notion that dent thoughts about moral and religious choices. I don't think all that makes me judges should allow personal feelings, political opinions, and social views to

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Harry B. Bronson, Esq. 585.233.8789 [email protected]

Wills Health Care Proxy Power of Attorney LGBT Partnership & Estate Planning Buying/Selling a House Name Changes Anti-Discrimination and Harassment Small Business Law Non-Profit Representation THANK YOU ALL FOR A GREAT "THE LATEST THING" PRESENTED BY THE GAY ALLIANCE AT THE RIT INN AND CONFERENCE CENTER ON SUNDAY, 4,16,10 ~ WITH THE 1ST SHOW AT 4:00PM & THE 2ND SHOW AT 7:00PM ~ DOORS OPENED AT 3 AND 6:00P,M, RESPECTFULLY TO FRIENDS, FAMILY, VOLUNTEERS AND AN AUDIENCE WHO WOULDN'T BELIEVE THEIR MINDS AFTER EXPERIENCING THIS "SHOW ABOUT FASHION" DEVELOPED IN A FEW SHORT MONTHS BY OUR STELLAR PRODUCTION TEAM:

MADHAUS D, PRODUCTION & CHOREOGRAPHER, OUR THANKS ALSO GO TO OUTLANDISH FOR THEIR LEATHER MARK ALLAN DAVIS WARE AND TO THEM AND EQUAL=GROUNDS FOR SELLING KIARA NATH, ASSISTANT CHOREOGRAPHER AND PROMOTING THESE SHOWS, TOM JOHNSTON AND EMILY TARADASH, STAGE MANAGER CHRIS STEUBING FOR THEIR IMPROMPTU MODELING! SCOTT GINETT, ASSISTANT MANAGER KEN CUYLER, WARDROBE/FASHION SUPERVISOR FINALLY, BEHIND-THE-SCENES AND THE DAY-OF EFFORT AND MICHAEL J. HARDY, HEAD COOK AND BOTTLE WASHER DEDICATION BY THESE FINE FOLKS ARE WHAT TRULY MADE OUR BRIAN KEHOE, MASTER OF CEREMONY, COMIC & MAGICIAN EVENT A COMPLETE SUCCESS, MAKE-UP BY MARY GURNOW, CAROL LEE AND SHORANDA IYEZ. OUR PHOTOGRAPHY BY THIS PRIDE 2010 FUNDRAISER WAS BROUGHT TO OUR KEVIN WEST, GERRY SZYMANSKI, JOI ONG AND LAURA AUDIENCE THROUGH THE GRACIOUSNESS AND GENEROSITY MCSPADDEN, VIDEO BY JOHN HOWARD, AND AS ALWAYS OF THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE AND ORGANIZATIONS; KAREN OUR FANTASTIC VOLUNTEERS FROM THE GAY ALLIANCE, DODSON AND TAMMY CHISMAN OF WATERLOO ESPECIALLY SCOTT FEARING, JEANNE GAINSBURG, PREMIUM OUTLETS, JUSTIN CHESHIRE HIS TEAM OF BLANCHE HARLING, MARK LEONARD TERRY GREEN, JESSE AND AUSTIN OF CHESHIRE AV, SUSAN LIGHT OF THERESA SCHWARTZ, SARAH NORTHROP, AMANDA BRIGHTON SECURITIES AND MICHAEL CALABRESE OF NEUBAUER, JOANN GRANATA, VITA TRINCALI, KIM GOOD LUCK RESTAURANT AND FRANCINE AND MATT SMITH, HEIDI SIMMONS, DAVE CURTIS, JULIANA AT RIT INN AND CONFERENCE CENTER - PLEASE THANK WHITE, JUDY JOHNSON, MEGGIE KAPTEIN, LIZ THEM AND FREQUENT THEIR BUSINESSES ~ THEY ARE WHY WE THYRATHTHONGSAY, JENNIFER RATCLIFF, MIR ARE SUCCESSFUL! BUCHANAN, MICHELLE KARCH, TERRI CVETAN, KRISTY FUNDERBURK, XIN YI CHAN, JACQUIE PAYNE, WE ARE SO VERY APPRECIATIVE OF THE HOURS AND MELINDA JOHNSTON, SUSAN MCMANUS, CHRIS HOURS OF REHEARSAL AND TIME GIVEN BY OUR ENTHUSIASTIC ROESNER, LEIGHTON JONES, MARY ANN SANFORD, "LATEST THINGS" MODELS! THEY PRESENTED THE CLOTHING DON DRACHENBERG, JOHN BRAUN, PAULINE BRAUN, AND MERCHANDISE BEAUTIFULLY AND WITH ENERGY AND SUSANNE STUPPERT, NEIL PETERSON, ERIC ENTHUSIASM LIKE NO OTHERS COULD HAVE! TYLER COTE, RODRIGUEZ, MICHAEL MARIO CASTRO, KATHRYN DEFEO, MICHAEL DELANEY, RANDY KOHLMEIER, MELISSA LANTY, A BIG THANK YOU TO OUR OUR 50/50 DRAWING WANDA MARTINEZ, DAVID MCLUCKIE, KIARA NATH, CONTRIBUTORS: THE RPO, VISITROCHESTER, PETER KATIE O'CONNOR, AMBER ORLANDO, ERIC SHOEN, MOHR/BACHELOR FORUM, HEDONIST CHOCOLATE, CARRIE WEREN MICHAEL KELLY/MASSAGE, 360/365 FILM FESTIVAL, METHODE MACHINE (LIPSTICK MASSACRE AND SPECIAL GUEST MODEL & DANCER, LARAMIE PROJECT 10) AND GENEVRA PETITO/YOGA! THOMAS WARFIELD WE WERE ALSO ABLE TO GIVE A LITTLE BACK TO A GOOD CAUSE WITH A $100 TO BROOKS BROTHERS FOR THEIR TWO MAKE­ PARTICIPATING STORES FROM WATERLOO PREMIUM A-WISH TEDDY BEARS WE INCLUDED IN OUR 50/50 DRAWING, OUTLETS: BANANA REPUBLIC FACTORY STORE, BASS, MUCH THANKS TO JOHN OWENS AND ERIC RODRIGUEZ BLACK & DECKER, BROOKS BROTHERS FACTORY FOR DONATING THEIR WINNINGS BACK TO GAGV FOR PRIDE STORE, CALVIN KLEIN, COLUMBIA SPORTSWEAR 2010 - YOUR KINDNESS AND GENEROSITY WERE AND ARE COMPANY, GUESS, HARRY & DAVID, JONES NEW YORK, SO VERY THOUGHTFUL! THANKS TO PLEASANT BUNS LANE BRYANT OUTLET, NINE WEST, REEBOK AND CATERING, MICHAEL HARDY AND ANNE TISCHER FOR TOTES/ISOTONER/SUNGLASS WORLD - MUCH THANKS!!! KEEPING THE MODELS AND VOLUNTEERS WELL FED! THE CLOTHING AND MERCHANDISE WERE SUPER AND THE SWAG BAGS, STORE COUPONS AND GREAT OFFERS ARE SURE FINALLY, TO OUR AUDIENCE WHO BOUGHT TICKETS, WE TO SPUR SOME SHOPPING AT YOUR FINE STORES OUT THERE AT HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE SHOW, WE'LL SEE YOU NEXT SPRING, WATERLOO PREMIUM OUTLETS! THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT! 10 B THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

They say Need a OJ for an hair loss doesn't matter... Upcoming What do you think? Party?

NEW-U Hair Replacement Specialists 1425 Jefferson Road, Saginaw Plaza Rochester, New York 14623 585-272-7320 - www.newuhairloss.com

Joe Russo, Psy.D., CGP Licensed Psychologist \. \0 Certified Group Psychotherapist -0 jOC~e ~~e • 25 Canterbury Road, Suite 308 P' C""~~.~ .- Rochester, New York 14607 ,v Phone: (585) 506-6096 E-mail: [email protected] T Weekly Bi/Gay T Addiction T Depression T Trauma Men's Therapy T Anxiety T Grief/Loss T Relationships Group

"'... a Roman Catholic ST. MARY'S CATHOLIC CHURCH parish in downtowll ROfhe51er thaI is 15 St. Mary's Place . weltominJ! Phone: 585 232-7140 '\ - t. al!!" E-mail: [email protected] Web: www.stmarysrochester.org

MASS TIMES Sat: 4pm - Sun: 9 & 11 am Weekdays: 12:10pm

Re ideo ial ew and Old ork · peciali· t , Serving the R()che.<,'ter ol'mmmi r for over 20 year.·

Angela M. Oddone LMSW

Supportive, affirming psychotheralPist with 15 years experience serving the gayl ~ lesb.an community. II Shur s" 100 Unden Oaks - Suite 200, Rochester, NY 14625 • Licen. ed ffi . : 654- 642 • (585) 586-1600 ully In ured .a .: 224-8228 • a ng el [email protected] . Quot L Vlo d@aoLcom . MAY 2010 • NUMBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET B 11

"Chris was great... very knowledgeable, professional, and thorough ... also patient ou r numerous questions ... I would recommend Chris as an agent in a S 'B£d & BREAkfAST by Greg Fox heartbeat. " - Eric and Dave, YOUR MOM~S~ ... SHE'S sup· Charlotte Area 8REYER'! T HAT POSEP TO ee L. .APY SURe RaSTING AND KNOWS HOW R"COVSRING ... Chris Del Conte 'THROW AF.: TEiR HeR . BIO.PSY! Licensed Realtor Interior Designer Home Staging Professional 585.750.0876 [email protected] www.CDeIConte.com

The Empty Closet is looking fora Sales Representative to sell advertising in the Empty Coset. 30% commission. 585-244-9030

First Tuesdays 7-9pm: Education Sessions St Thomas' Episcopal Church, 2000 Highland Avenue, Rochester 14618. Guest speakers present information followed by a group discussion.

Third Sundays 2-4pm: Support & Discussion Auditorium Theatre 5th Floor 875 East Main Street Rochester 14605 Facilitated discussion to provide support to attendees while engaging the group in a variety of topics. (Occurs at the same time as the youth and young adult support groups that occur in the Youth Center on the first floor of the building)

Elaine Elkins, M.S. a cial PIa Psychotherapist 244 ... 4837 [email protected] Ka Conhead, CFp® ~ advice for the www.aproposfp.com Y Y LGBT community from Phone: (585) 533-1950 Fee-only one of your own! Individual & Relationship Counseling Anxiety & Depression Loneliness & Separation Conflict Resolution Communication Skills Sexual Abuse Recovery Drug & Alcohol Abuse Grief & Loss 12 B THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

THE BIG'* GAY PROM * * * ** * * P'*'*'*'* * uti '*'*'* * '*'* * * *' * * * '* * '* ** * '** * * * * *' * * '* * * *** '*'*'* ~'*'* * * * * '* * ~fA. * ~* ,** fA. * ** * * ** * '*'* '*'*'* * * * • AA * Friday, May 7 '* * * * BOWLING NIGHT: Gay Alliance staff and significant others went bowling in Fairport in April. L-R, first row: Jeanne Gainsburg, Brian Doran, Lee Bender, Strathallan Hotel * Laura McSpadden. Second row: Sue Cowell, Kelly Baumgartner, Mariam Mull. Back row: Jim Anderson, Todd Gordon, Scott Fearing, Ed Freedman. Strathallan Hotel / $10 / Drug & Alcohol Free / Ages 13-23/ Straight Allies Wel­ come / Music by DJ Chuck Argento / For more information: BigGayProm@gay­ alliance.org / 585 244-8640, ext 13

-Tues., May 4, 7pm, Keeping Safety in Mind -Thurs., May 6, 6:30pm, Geva: "Five Course Love" -Tues., May 11, 7pm, Defending against Biblical Attacks -Wed., May 19, 7pm, Screening: Times of Harvey Milk -Thurs., May 27, 7pm, MAG: Gender Depictions in Art

Josh, Nereiea and Jess Cohen at RIT.

Youth Services

The Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley offers Youth Services for Rochester area LGBTQ and allied youth ages 13-25.

Check out what's happening: • www.gayalliance.org or e-mail: [email protected] Youth Center Happenings • Drop-in: Monday and Wednesday 2-6pm • Support Groups • Sunday 2-4pm, ages 13-23 • Sunday 4:30-6pm, ages 18-25

• Special Interest Programming • Transgender Youth • Arts and Crafts • Movies • Writing • Special Events • Youth Dances • Day of Silence • Big Gay Prom • LGBTQ Youth Library • Pool Table • Internet Access Adult Volunteers Needed Fun, friendly, safe adults are needed to volunteer their time and talents, providing positive role models, sharing a talent or skill. Contact Scott Fearing, Outreach Coordinator for an application: QUEER COLLEGE TOURS continued in April at RIT (above) and at SUNY Brock­ [email protected] or 585-244-8640, ext. 14 port, MCC and Ithaca College. Photos: Laura McSpadden MAY 2010 • NUMBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET B 13

Brockport, went on a gay-student-Ied tour the emergency room or child abuse clinic those from faith communities and with Program and attended a drag show at RIT, enjoyed of a Denver children's hospital during those from the LG BT communities. lunch at Equal Grounds after visiting a one-year period (from July 1, 1991 to To help community members engage MCC and survived a van trip all the way June 30, 1992). The molester was a gay in this dialogue, at 7 p.m., on May Notes to Ithaca! or lesbian adult in fewer than one percent 11, Reverend Jim Mulcahy, Senior Pas­ With a goal of increasing interest in of cases in which an adult molester could tor of Open Arms Metropolitan Com­ Support LGBT youth, higher education, the tours have been be identified - only two of the 269 cases munity Church, will lead an InQueery shop at the Gay-Garage very successful! Youth Program members (Jenny et al., 1994). class entitled "The Bible as a Weapon to have requested more information and However, ultimately the studies do Attack LGBT People: Misinterpretation Sale on June 19 printed admissions applications. Thanks not matter, but the truth does, as does and Misuse." From 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. on Saturday go out to the many community members the responsibility to end the abuse. Rev. Mulcahy will have participants June 19, the Gay Alliance will host the who supported the tours by purchasing Childhood sexual abuse is a horrible examine the biblical texts from Old and Gay-Garage Sale & Book Extravaganza Graduation Caps at The Bachelor Forum, and far too common crime. Creating New Testaments most often used to con­ inside the Gay Alliance Youth Center at OutLandish and Equal=Grounds, The a smokescreen to blame "homosexu­ demn gay and lesbian people. There will 875 E Main St., 14605. Your donations to Avenue Pub and 140 Alexander. als" does not help to end the crime. The be time for discussion of actual texts and and purchases from the Gay-Garage Sale Sean Soper, the Gay Alliance Youth Roman Catholic Church has a lot to an examination of scriptural language, will benefit the Gay Alliance Youth Pro­ Program AmeriCorps member, has spear­ answer for in these cases, and we need culture and context, as well as various gram and your purchases from the Book headed this effort. He and Youth Pro­ to question their choice to continue their views of the Bible. Extravaganza will benefit the Gay Alli­ gram Director Jessica Cohen are looking attacks against "homosexuals," creating For more information look for the ance Library and Archives. forward to planning additional trips, in more confusion and inflicting more spir­ InQueery link under the Education tab at New and gently used housewares, partnership with Allegra Anka and AIDS itual wounds in LGBT people, families www.GayAlliance.org . • clothing, collectibles, books, and others Care, this summer, to Alfred, Syracuse and communities. items can be delivered to the Gay Alli­ University, SUNY Oswego, Buffalo, UR I know that some LGBT commu­ ance Youth Center by noon on June 14. and Nazareth! • nity members have "no time" for tradi­ To schedule a delivery time, please contact tional faith communities, and "no place" AVP: cruising the parks Jess at 585-244-8640 x13. Sorry, no used for spiritual practice in their lives. So, is dangerous computers or printers will be accepted. Spiritual abuse: Using a as they read this, they are mumbling to HIV Vaccine Awareness themselves, "Why waste our time on this By Kelly Clark book as a weapon faith stuff? They don't want us, we don't The warm weather returned early to Day 2010: An HIV want them." Rochester; the dogwoods and magnolias vaccine "n" our lifetime By Scott Fearing Well, even the most non-theist queer in Highland Park are all dressed up and Catholic, Wiccan, Jewish, Episcopa­ is the victim of spiritual abuse. Even those ready to go with the lilacs close behind. May 18 is national HIV Vaccine lian, Atheist, Lutheran, Buddhist, Non­ Awareness Day (HVAD). This annual of us who have found a welcoming faith Like most Rochestarians after a long theist, Anamist, Baptist, Muslim, etc. community are subject to the fallout of winter, I couldn't wait for that first walk observance is a day to recognize and These words, identities, communities, and the abuse doled out by unwelcoming reli­ through the park. I was greeted by pooch­ thank the thousands of volunteers, com­ traditions mean so much to so many. munity members, health professionals, gious groups. es and their people, babies and their Even when one does not subscribe to I have had LGBT people tell me that mommies and daddies, and lots of other and scientists who are working together any faith dogma or tradition, our non­ to find a safe and effective HIV vaccine. It their own parents have used "faith" as folks looking to take in the fresh air. faith-tradition is often defined in rela­ a "reason" to disown their child. I have I was also reminded of several calls for is also a day to educate our communities tion to a faith-based-normality (much as about the importance of preventive HIV had political leaders tell me that they help we received here at the Gay Alliance queerness is the antithesis of hetero-nor­ CANNOT vote their secular conviction last summer from men accused of lewd vaccine research. mality.) Rochester is home to one of the oldest because their faith stops them from sup­ and sexual behavior in the parks. With What is clear is that questions of des­ porting full equality. this early spring, I thought, "I better let research units in the country, and as such tiny, purpose, pre- and post life are things Rochester has a lot to celebrate. Please join I have learned in my nearly 20 years the community know that seeking sexual that peoples across time and the world of educating people on LGBT inclusion partners in our city and county parks is the celebration at noon on May 18, in the over contemplate and seek-out answers Community Room on the 4th floor at the that faith and spirituality provide a cover not a wise idea." that go beyond their day to day life. to many people who are looking for a way Not only does it put you at risk for Damon City Campus of Monroe Com­ Douglas Adams, in his book "The munity College. to hide their own bigotry, their own bias, victimization and crime, ranging from Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy", pro­ their own hatred. Many a person whose robbery to physical and sexual assault vides a succinct summary of the story of Un Blood Drive only use for words common in the texts and even murder, it can put you at risk CampusOUT will be partnering with Jesus as "one man had been nailed to a of the faithful are as expletives, is quick of arrest and jail time. I have heard many RIT's OUTSpoken to run an UnBlood tree for saying how great it would be to be to tell me that they can NOT accept their people say that "it is just like getting a Drive to raise awareness of the FDA's dis­ nice to people for a change." (sic) LG BT co-worker because "that" is sinful. ticket." Did you know that if you go to criminatory stance towards MSM blood This simple summary is the core of In order to encourage dialogue and the park and are picked up by law enforce­ donations and will feature a panel discus­ most every faith tradition -- and kinder­ discussion, we must all examine our own ment with no ID on you, you are auto­ sion with speakers from the Red Cross garten classroom. Be nice, be respectful feelings around these issues. To simply matically arrested and taken to jail? and from AIDS Care. The event will and don't rush to judgment. Yet for many say, "that is not my faith" is not enough. What may have been "just a ticket" be held Friday, May 7 with informa­ faith traditions, this core message ends We live in a nation that values every can turn instantly into an overnight jail tion tables 11 a.m.-3 p.m., followed by a up deeply shielded by dogma, and comes faith and non-faith experience on equal stay. Please, my friends, think twice, panel discussion at 3 p.m. Contact Cam­ with a list of requirements that must be ground. We must learn to address LGBT maybe even three times about that trip to pusOUT Coordinator Mariam Mull for met, if you want "me" to be nice to "you." spiritual abuse, we must learn how and the park. Trust me, that one phone call is more details, at mariamm@gayalliance. For members of the LG BT commu­ when to have respectful dialogue with not a fun one to make . • org. nities, issues of spirituality and faith can be tough issues to examine, or even talk LGBT Youth Program about. Many of us are so used to being blooms clobbered with Biblical text that, like any Fun in the Spring has brought new life into the abused individual, we avoid any discus­ Sand Gay Alliance Youth Program! sion in order to avoid more pain. Some With flowers blooming and leaves eschew all traditional faith communities, By Jeanne Gainsburg, budding, the LGBTQ youth of Roches­ while others may sit silently while their OUTReach Coordina­ ter are coming out of hibernation (and spiritual leaders assault them, their love tor closets!) to enjoy the sunshine and queer and their families. Last month, as part youth programming. With 200+ students Speaking of clobbering, the Roman of the Gay Alliance attending the Day of Silence rally on April Catholic Church is again ramping up its InQueery series of edu­ 16, the Youth Program is now gearing up anti-gay propaganda machine to cover cational events, I ran a for the annual Big Gay Prom, which will their inability to effectively deal with Basic Volleyball Skills be held Friday, May 7 at the Strathal­ child molestation and abuse. Cardinal Class with LG BT Flare Ian Hotel! For more details on the Prom Bertone has even gone on record saying at Hot Shots Volleyball or Youth Programs, please contact Jess that "there is a relation between homo­ Club and we had a great Cohen, Youth Program Director, at 244- sexuality and pedophilia." time messing around in 8640 or [email protected]. What? Where did he get that "fact" the sand. from? Seems like the Cardinal may be try­ Thanks to my capa­ Queer campus visits to ing to confuse the issue with no research ble assistants, Ed Freed­ continue over summer to support him. Most unbiased research man, Mike Kelly and Janet Epstein, we were able to run some drills which gave Youth Program participants have been has failed to find a connection between participants a chance to learn some of the basics of volleyball: bump, set, spike and serve. visiting colleges as part of the Queer Col­ homosexuality and child molestation. After the two hour class and before the beer, my buddy Ron Strunk gave us all some lege Tour program. In April, they visited Dr. Carole Jenny and her colleagues information on local queer volleyball leagues. RIT, SUNY Brockport, MCC and Ithaca reviewed 352 medical charts, representing Please contact me at 585-244-8640 ext. 14 or [email protected] if you want College! Participants attended a lecture at all of the sexually abused children seen in more information on LGBTA volleyball in our area. Dig it! •

The Gay Alliance 875 E. Main St., Suite 500 Rochester, NY 14605 • Hours Mon.-Fri., 9am-5pm • Phone: (585) 244-8640 • Fax: (585) 244-8246 • Website: www.gayalliance.org Empty Closet Phone: (585) 244-9030 • Empty Closet Fax: (585) 244-8246 • Empty Closet Advertising: (585) 244-9030 • Empty Closet E-mail: [email protected] Board President Tom Ferrarese • Executive Director Sue Cowell • Administrative Assistant Laura McSpadden • Program Director Scott Fearing Empty Closet Editor Susan Jordan • Graphics Jim Anderson • Community Safety Kelly Clark • Development Brian Doran Victim Advocate Kelly Baumgartner Youth Services Coordinator Jessica Cohen • CampusOut Assistant Mariam Mull • Outreach Coordinator Jeanne Gainsburg • AmeriCorps Member Sean Soper Youth Group: Youth Center, 1st Floor - Ages 13-23 Sundays 2-4pm; Ages 18-25 Sundays 4:30-6pm • http://youth.gayalliance.org for after school schedule and special events. The Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley is a non-profit agency, dedicated to cultivating a healthy, inclusive environment where lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans-gender (LGBT) people are safe, thriving and enjoying equal rights. We are a coalition of individuals and groups working to empower LGBT people, to affirm their identities, and to create an atmosphere where the diversity of our community can thrive both collectively and separately. We educate and advocate for civil rights for all and for the eradication of homophobia. 14 B THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

management, free cconfidential testing (Ora­ Monroe County Women's Health Quick Rapid Testing), NYS Dep't. of Health offers Partnership free on-site confidential and anonymous testing, 111 Westfall Rd" Rochester NY 14692; (585)325-5100, M-F 8 am-9 pm, www.huther­ (585)274-6978, Comprehensive breast cancer Resources doyle,com, screening services for uninsured and underin­ Strong Memorial Hospital Geneva Community Health sured women, AIDS provides a complete range of HIV medical care, including access to experimental treatment pro­ 601 W. Washington St., Geneva, Provides HIV Elizabeth Wende Breast Clinic Free testing for HIV exposure testing, HIV specialty and primary care for resi­ 170 Sawgrass Drive, 442-8432, Dr. Wende tocols, and HIV testing, Also provides individual is available from New York State Department of dents of Ontario and surrounding counties, and group psychotherapy, Training of health care Logan-Young and an all-woman staff provide Health: call Rochester Area Regional Hotline at Mon,-Thurs, 9 am-5 pm; Fridays 9 am-noon, mammograms, (585) 423-8081, or 1-800-962-5063 for pay professionals also available, Infectious Disease 315-781-8448, phones or calls outside Rochester, Deaf or hear­ Clinic, (585) 275-0526, Department of Psychia­ SHARE: Self Help for Women with Breast ing impaired people should call (585)423-8120 try, (585) 275-3379, AIDS Training Project, (585) or Ovarian Cancer (TOO,) New Rapid HIV Testing now available­ 275-5693, FAMILY NYS Hotline: 1-866-53SHARE or 1-866-537- test results in 30-40 minutes! Statewide informa­ Planned Parenthood of Rochester and Rochester Gay Moms' Group 4273, tion can be obtained by calling 1-800-541-AIDS, Genesee Valley Support group for lesbian mommies and wan­ AIDS Rochester Women's Health Outreach Other organizations which provide AIDS-related offers testing and information (585) 546 2595, nabe mommies in Rochester and surrounding 259 Monroe Ave, ARI has services for HIV services are as follows: areas, Subscribe: RochesterGayMoms-sub­ Rural HIV testing positive women and others in the lesbian com­ scribe@yahoogroups,com, munity, 442-2220, AIDS Care anonymous and confidential, in Alleghany, Liv­ AIDS Care, the leading provider of HIV/AIDS ser­ ingston, Ontario, Schuyler, Seneca, Steuben, AIDS Care vices in Rochester and the Finger Lakes, was Pride &Joy Families Wayne or Yates Counties, call 1-800-962-5063, In Rochester, contact Karen Goulet, kgoulet@ 259 Monroe Ave, 244-9000; TTY (585)461- formed by the January 2010 merger of AIDS 9202, HIV and Primary care medical services Community Health Center and AIDS Rochester, Action Front Center PrideandJoyFamilies,org or 244-8640 x 40, (Action for a Better Community,) Provides HIV for HIV positive women, their negative partners On-site services include: HIV testing and limited lesbian &Gay Family Building Project and family members, OB/GYN, HIV pre-test and STD screenings, Primary and HIV Specialty Medi­ prevention education and case management ser­ Claudia E. Stallman, Project Director, Ferre vices, Training and technical assistance to service post-test counseling, Confidential or free HIV cal Care, Pharmacy, Behavioral Wellness, Case Institute, Inc, 124 Front St., Binghampton, NY testing, Management, Prevention and Education, Clinical providers, Resource library open to public, All 13905, Phone: (607) 724-4308; Fax: (607) Trials, Dental Screenings, Hepatitis CCo-Infection services free and confidential. Multicultural and 724-8290; E-mail: [email protected]: Alternatives for Battered Women Clinic, Housing Services, Laboratory, Nutrition bilingual staff, Jearald Noble, program manager, Web: www.PrideAndJoyFamilies.org 232-7353; TTY 232-1741. Shelter (women 33 Chestnut St., second floor, Hours 8:30-5 pm, only), counseling, Lesbians, gay men welcome, Services, Peer Interaction, Smoking Cessation, Families Joined by Love Substance Use and Addiction Counseling, Sup­ Monday-Friday, 262-4330; fax 262-4572. Free GAGV Anti Violence Project anonymous HIV testing on walk-in basis, Tues­ Books and resources for LGBT families, port Groups, Transportation Services, Treatment www.familiesjoinedebylove,org, 585-244-8640 ext 17. For women and men, Adherence Counseling, and Women's Health days, Wednesdays 1-4 pm, provided through Care, AIDS Care is also a leader in providing ser­ NYSDOH, Thursdays 1-4 pm at Aenon Baptist Parents, Families and Friends of Victim Resource Center of Wayne County vices and education to members of the LGBT Church, 175 Genesee St. lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) Newark NY. Hotline 800-456-1172; office (315)331-1171; fax (315)331-1189, community, Contact Information: Website: www. Anthony L. Jordan Health Center PFLAG's threefold mission: supporting par­ acRochester,org, Main Office: 259 Monroe Ave" Prevention &Primary Care Program ents and family members in coming out pro­ Mary Magdalene House Rochester, NY 14607; Main Phone: 585-545- Provides Medical Case Management, Mental cess; educating the community; advocating Women's outreach center for HIV positive 7200 - Health Services After Hours: 585-258- Health, Primary Care, HIV Counceling and Testing on behalf of LGBT family members, Regular women and women at risk, 291 Lyell Ave, 3363; Case Management After Hours (Lifeline): using the Orasure Rapid Test, Education presen­ meetings: first Tuesday 7-9 pm, St. Thomas Open Mon-Fri. 6:30-9:30 pm 458-5728, 585-275-5151; Fax: 585-244-6456, Finger tations, and access to other Jordan services, Pre­ Episcopal Church, comer Winton and Highland; third Sunday, 2-4 pm, Nopper Room, fifth floor, Planned Parenthood of the Rochester/Syr­ Lakes Office: 605 W. Washington St., Geneva, vention & Primary Care is a walk-in program; no acuse Region NY 14456,315-781-6303, Southern Tier Office: appointments necessary, Office hours: Mon,- Fri., Auditorium Center, 875 E, Main St. PFLAG@ gagv,us; 585-244-8640 x27, 114 University Ave" Rochester, NY 14605; 122 Liberty St. POBox 624, Bath, NY 14810 8:30am- 5 pm: extended hours on Monday until Toll-free Helpline: 1-866-600-6886, Planned 607-776-9166, The Health Outreach Project: 416 8 pm, (585) 423-2879; fax (585) 423-2876, Parenthood has led the way in providing high Central Ave" Rochester, NY 14605; 585-454-5556, Website: www.jordanhealth,org, For more infor­ LGBT HEALTH quality, affordable reproductive health care Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley mation, call Program Director Patrick M, Trevor, For a list of LGBT-friendly and competent health since 1916, Our experienced and compassion­ provides referrals to physicians and service agen­ (585) 423-2879, and human service providers in the Rochester ate medical staff will listen to your concerns and cies, (585) 244-8640; www.gayalliance,org, CDC National S1D and AIDS Hotline and Finger Lakes area, visit the resource direc­ answer your questions in a warm, welcoming 1-800-CDC-INFO (800-232-4636) 24 hours tory page(s) at www.everybodysgood.com. These atmosphere, All our services are confidential. Victory Alliance pages are compiled and managed by AIDS Care, We accept most insurances; including Medic­ University of Rochester Medical Center, One of a day, TTY service: 1-888-232-6348, E-mail address: cdcinfo@cdc,gov, If you are a provider, or know of one, who would aid, You may even qualify for low- to no-cost several research sites worldwide that comprise like to be included, contact them through the family planning services, When you make your the HIV Vaccine Trials Network, Rochester site Fair Housing Enforcement Project of website or contact Erik Libey directly at (585) appointment, be sure to ask about our sliding conducts research vaccine studies sponsored by Monroe County 210-4192, scale fees, No one is turned away for lack of National Institutes of Health (NIH) in the attempt 585-325-2500; 1-800-669-9777. Deals with ability to pay, to discover a vaccine that may one day prevent housing discrimination on basis of race, orienta­ Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley HIV infection or AIDS, Imagine aworld without tion, HIV status, etc, See www.gayalliance,org Resource Directory POLITICAL: AIDS, learn how you can help create it. 585-756- under" Health" for GAGV referrals to physicians National Organization for Women Public Interest Law Office of Rochester and service agencies, 2329; www.vaccineunit.org, 80 St. Paul St., Suite 701. Free legal services to (Greater Rochester NOW) Center for Health and Behavioral Training of HIV positive persons, families, Spanish bilingual PO Box 93196; (585)234-7019, E-mail: Monroe County advocates available, All civil cases except divorce; WOMEN info@rochestemow,org Web page: http:// www,rochesternow,org, 853 Main St., Rochester 14611. Collaboration no criminal cases, Ask to speak to someone in HEALTH: of Monroe County Health Department and U,R, PILOR, 454-4060, Highland Hospital Breast Imaging Center CULTURAL: Provides year-round training in prevention and Evergreen Health Services, Buffalo 500 Red Creek Drive, Rochester 14623; 585- management of STDs, HIV, TB and related issues, Rochester Women's Community Chorus Primary care, HIV and family care, HIV testing and 487-3300, Specializing in breast health, diag­ 234-4441, (See Ongoing calendar), such as domestic violence and case manage­ counseling, (716) 847-0328 nostic breast imaging and treatment and ment. (585)753-5382 v/tty, Westside Health Services mammography outreach and education, ONLINE: Planned Parenthood of the Rochester/ Brown Square Health Center, 175 Lyell Ave, (254- Breast Cancer Coalition of Rochester WOWcny: Syracuse Region 6480); Woodward health Center, 480 Genesee 840 University Ave,; 585-473-8177; www.bccr, e-mail: [email protected] 114 University Ave" Rochester, NY 14605; Toll­ St. (436-3040), HIVIAIDS services, support, more, org; email: info@bccr,org, Breast Cancer Coali­ Rochester NY Lesbians; free Helpline: 1-866-600-6886, Offers confiden­ tion provides support services that include Brown groups ,aol ,com/rochstrlesbians tial HIV testing and information, When you make McCree McCuller Wellness Center at Unity Health's Connection Clinic Bag Fridays: an informal discussion group that your appointment, be sure to ask about our slid­ meets weekly from 12:00-1 :30; Breast Cancer GENERAL: ing scale fees, No one is turned away for lack of (585) 368-3200, 89 Genesee St., Bishop Kear­ ney Bldg" 3rd floor, Full range of servcies, regard­ 101 and 201: programs designed to help those Women's Resource Center ability to pay, YWCA, 175 N, Clinton Ave, 546-7740, less of ability to pay, Caring, confidential and coping with a recent breast cancer diagnosis and Rochester Area Task Force on AIDS convenient. those coping with an advanced breast cancer Color Outside the line Crew A collection of agencies providing a multiplicity of diagnosis; Sister Sak: a program that addresses Contact Jackie Williams, 482-4945, resources and services to the upstate New York Catholic Charities AIDS Services the issues facing young women with breast can­ community, Their offices are located through the A multicultural and bi-lingual staff providing ser­ cer; and the Advanced Breast Cancer Support Finger Lakes Health Systems Agency, which also vices to a diversity of people infected and affected Group to support women living with metastatic Check our monthly and ongoing Calendars provides medical literature and newspaper clip­ with HIVlntensive home-based case management breast cancer, The Breast Cancer Coalition also and the Gay Groups section for more groups pings, as well as demographic and statistical data for all ages; a clinical crisis manager; a child/ provides information about breast cancer, a lend­ and events, For more information, call the for use in developing health care services, (585) adolescent case worker; transitional case man­ ing library, and a monthly educational program, GAGV at 244-8640 or see www,gayalliance, 461-3520, agement for children and family members going All BCCR programs and support services are free, org, And send us your information! through bereavement; recreational and support MOCHA Center of Rochester groups for children and teens, and camping expe­ Our mission is to improve health and wellness in riences including Camp SOAR, We coordinate communities of color through intervention and HOPWA (Housing Opportunities for People with Certified Professional Pet Grooming Pick-up & Drop-off Service Available service, with emphasis on LGBTQ programming, AIDS) short term emergency assistance with rent! (585) 271-2530 Youth drop-in center, HIV testing, peer education, mortgage/utility payments and limited subsidized support groups, computer lab, referral services housing, 1945 E, Ridge Rd" Suite 24, Rochester and more, Stop by 107 Liberty Pole Way (corner NY 14622, (585) 339-9800, of Pleasant) or call (585)420-1400, Huther Doyle Monroe County Health Department 360 East Ave" Rochester 14604, Offers drug, at 855 W. Main St., offers testing and counseling alcohol prevention, education, treatment. Risk James Del Favero for HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases, Reduction Plus Team offers servcies to HIV posi­ THE 45 Pavilion Street (585)753-5481, tive and those at risk through substance use, Barker',s Barber' Rochester, NY 14620 Programs include outreach, transitional case MAY 2010 • NUMBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET B 15

monthly potlucks, a summer picnic and a Some musical numbers will include oldest clubs of its type in the country. members' only event once a year that pres­ "The Navy Knows" and "I Am the Cap­ All who are interested in the leather club ents a different opportunity for fun. tain". scene are invited to check us out. Our In addition to all that, our changes are "U.S.S. Metaphor" will be presented general meeting is open to the public and GrQUps going to help us to become more involved on June 12 at 8 p.m. at Hochstein. we meet the Wednesday before bar night in our greater community. Some of us are Tickets are $15 in advance, $18 at at 7:30 p.m. Meetings are held at our going to a SAGE USA training in a few the door. Students and seniors are $12 in home bar, the Bachelor Forum, 670 Uni­ weeks in order to be able to help nurs­ advance, $15 at the door. Children under versity Ave. Our next general meetings DIGNITY INTEGRITY ing homes and other facilities understand 12 are $6. Tickets may be purchased on will be held on May 12, June 16 and July Come celebrate the Easter Season and the needs of older LGBT consumers. We line at www.thergmc.org or from outlets: 14. For more info, visit our website: www. Pentecost with Dignity Integrity of Roch­ are lobbying for our rights in Albany Parkleigh, Creator's Hands, Outlandish rochesterrams.com. ester! and Washington. And soon we hope to and Equal=Grounds or call 585-423- 0650 for more information. All are welcome to attend our weekly become more involved in situations and SECOND THURSDAYS church services, which begin at 5 p.m. events that will improve the lives of our For those who miss the former Roches­ on Sundays at St. Luke's and St. Simon maturing LGBT population. America is ROCHESTER RAMS M.C. aging, but we are not necessarily our par­ ter Business Forum, "Second Thursdays Cyrene Church, 17 South Fitzhugh St. in Don't forget that once again, the Rams Social and Business Networking Party" downtown Rochester. ents' "seniors." We are healthier and liv­ ing longer and want to enjoy the perks of will host our annual Can-Am weekend invites you to a casual cocktail party with Those in attendance are welcome to this month. The week long celebration of complimentary appetizers at some very stay after the service for coffee hour, and/ being more visible in today's society. Personally, I will be 56 in a few weeks, cross-border leather brotherhood kicks off elegant restaurants in the Rochester area. or going out to dinner with the group fol­ with the Rams' monthly Leather-Fetish On Thursday, May 13, we meet lowing the service. but despite the occasional reminder that my body isn't quite as agile as it was 20 bar night on Saturday, May 15 from 9 5:30-7:30 p.m. at the newly re-opened One of the highlights of this month's p.m. to 2 a.m. at the Forum. Mamooche Bistro, 384 East Ave. in Roch­ events will be a performance by jazz/ years ago, and my increasing resemblance to my mother, I have more energy and Then on Saturday, May 22, the won­ ester. Everyone is invited; there are no blues pianist Tim Schramm, who will be derful men of Spearhead from Toronto dues, no cover charge, just conversation returning for another hymn sing on the more excitement about my future, along with more time to express it, than I've Ontario will host the special CanAm bar­ and a 50/50 Raffle for Rochester PRIDE. fourth Sunday of this month; this time night also at the Forum. All bar nights are Future parties are scheduled for Thurs­ we'll hear many "old" favorites and since ever had in my life. I want to share that excitement with others and help to create public, but there will be additional events day, June 10 at Lento at Village Gate, and it is Pentecost it will surely be a lift to planned for Can Am weekend. If you'd then on Thursday, July 8, as one of the everyone's spirits! a wonderful future for all my baby boom­ er LGBT family. like to attend, please check out the details kick-off parties for Rochester PRIDE, the EP- Episcopal Service; RC- Roman at the CanAm link on our website or the Woodcliff Hotel & Spa near Eastview Catholic Service. I hope you'll join us for our next pot­ luck and add your energy to our growing posters currently displayed at the Forum. Mall has invited us to a poolside party. Schedule of services for May, 2010: The Rochester Rams M.e. is Roches­ For more information, please con­ first Sunday, EP Eucharist with music; group. We meet on the third Sunday of every month, 4 p.m. at the Universalist ter New York's foremost gay motorcycle tact Out and Equal NY Finger Lakes. or second Sunday, RC Liturgy of the Word; & leather club as well as being one of the [email protected]. third Sunday, EP Eucharist without Church at 150 South Clinton Ave. Check music; fourth Sunday, Hymn Sing with our website, rainbowsage.org, for more information and events. Tim Schramm (no Pot Luck supper this week ... moved to next week); fifth Sun­ day, RC Evening Prayer, followed by "Pot JUST US GUYS STEPPING OUT: drinking coffee, and eating cupcakes. Luck Picnic in the Park." Batman and Robin never got this treat­ Come join our gathering on May 11 We will be holding our ever-popular UNMASKING 8DSM ment when they entered an evil lair! This at 6:30 p.m. at AIDS Care, 259 Monroe part I probably could have handled with­ D-I Garage Sale in Lima on June 4,5 and Ave., for what promises to be a different (EPISODE TWO) 6. The sale coincides with the area's "Trail out Pam. and interesting program. The topic: "Butt By Jeanne Gainsburg of Treasures" along Route 5 and 20, from We signed in at the check in desk and Health"! Last month, we left our Dynamic Caledonia to Bloomfield. Great bargains then Todd came over to welcome us and Anal health is an important, although Duo, Jeanne and Pam, just entering the to give us a tour (i.e. "Chain hoist over will be available for all. The address for not always easy to discuss, issue for gay the garage sale is 6963 West Main Road, dungeon at the Rochester Kink Soci­ here, cage over there, fridge with spring and bisexual men of all ages. Join this ety (RKS). They were about to attend water, St. Andrew's Cross, locker for play Lima, NY 14485. frank, fun and interactive discussion and a bondage and discipline, dominance party clothes, padded bondage table, and We look forward to seeing you on get your questions answered! and submission, sadism and masochism bathrooms down the hall"). After looking Sunday. Local anal health providers Terry (BDSM) workshop called Skin2Skin & around a bit, Pam and I took a seat with Schwartz and Craig Durie, both nursing Paw2Paw, being presented by the famous the others. The workshop started at about EMPIRE BEARS staff at Rochester Colon and Rectal Sur­ Dom, Panther, followed by a "Play Party." 7 p.m. There were 50 people present. geons, will cover a wide range of issues "Holy Bustiers, Pam," I exclaimed! "I Panther, a well known Dom and Saturday night, May 1, the Empire related to anal health. Topics will include can't believe my eyes!" BDSM educator, had been flown in from Bears will be at the Forum for DENIM the latest information about HPV and "Flying Floggers, Jeanne! Are those the San Francisco area to teach us about night. Jeans, jackets, vests, bibs, shorts; all anal cancer, anal pap smears, access to people really sinking their teeth into ... techniques for bare-hand S/m play. In the denim is right for the night. Come enjoy HPV vaccine (Gardasil) for young gay/bi cupcakes?!!!" first part of the workshop, Panther and some fun, food, and friendly times with men, information about other anal health Fully prepared for a Batman-esque his volunteer assistant focused on slap­ the BEARS. concerns and general anal health ques­ scene, with a "POW!" and a "BAM!" and ping, kicking, punching, pinching, pok­ Then, Saturday the 8th we'll be at the tions. There will be an opportunity to ask a "ZONK!" Pam and I were shocked to ing, hair pulling (you get the idea), as well GAGV Youth Center for our monthly questions and get honest, open answers, find the room full of people chatting, (Stepping Out continues page 16) potluck. The theme for May is Asian in addition to learning about resources in foods, but BEARS are omnivores; we'll our community to keep ourselves and our eat anything! We have beverages, plastic, butts healthy! and paper goods. Just bring a nice big bas­ For more information about the group ket to share with the BEARS. We usually or our May program, contact Ron at 223- meet at 6:30 and eat at 7, then play some 2629. games, cards, Wii, or visit. Join us. Every Wednesday night, we feast at RGMC the Wintonaire on Winton at Atlantic at 6. Becky, our den mom, welcomes every­ Sail away this June with the Rochester one. The food's excellent and plentiful. Gay Men's Chorus and their rendition of The manager is good to us, and we have a "U.S.S. Metaphor". First made famous great time every week. Many of us also hit by the San Francisco Gay Men's Chorus, The Cinema for a movie. this hilarious parody is based on Gilbert Camping season has started, so many and Sullivan's comedic classic "H.M.S. of our members will be spending week­ Pinafore". ends at Jones Pond, Hillside, Oneida, and "U.S.S. Metaphor" promises to enter­ The Point. We welcome new members, tain with a witty cast of characters like and often invite friends to camp with us. Captain Closeted and the ever-virtuous Check us out at www.empirebears.org. Reverend Dick Deadheart. The satiri­ Have a grrrrrrreat month! WOOF! cal script humorously pokes fun at the U.S. military's discriminatory "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy, while advocating a THE EXCITING mainstream mindset of gay marriage. POTENTIAL OF In addition, the RGM C is honored RAINBOW SAGE to have Army Sergeant Darren Manzella attend as their special guest. On Dec. By Kitty Moran 16, 2007, Manzella bravely spoke to 60 This has been a year of change for the Minutes, without permission, about being mature LGBT community in Rochester. openly gay in the military. His "outing" We changed our name from Rainbow was not received well by some, including Seniors to Rainbow SAGE, and we are his commanding officer, and he has since working toward an affiliation with the spoken out against the "Don't Ask, Don't Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley. Tell" policy. Change can be difficult, especially A medical liaison for his unit, Manzel­ if we don't understand it, but I for one la has deployed twice to serve his country am energized and excited about these in the Iraq war and even earned a combat changes. Rainbow SAGE continues to be medal for rendering treatment under fire a fun place to gather. We have dances and in Baghdad in 2005. 16 B THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

(Groups continued from page 15) partner too. He told me that scented A naked man was chained to a post and tions are all on the RKS website at: http:// as basic anatomy and areas of the human waxes and waxes that are darker in color being flogged by a woman. He was quiet. rochesterkinksociety.com. Call (585-234- body that are dangerous and should be tend to burn hotter. His partner prefers Two other scenes involved naked 5295) or e-mail (rks@RochesterKinkSo­ avoided to prevent injury. Panther talked a wax that burns cooler. It feels better to women lying on tables being flogged by ciety.com) or contact me at the Gay about safe words and signals that everyone her. Hot, but not too hot. Not only was men. They were grunting. Alliance ([email protected]) if should know and use if they are in a dan­ I touched by the care and concern that One nude woman was slowly being you would like more information about gerous situation. Todd had for his partner's pleasure, but I suspended by a man who was using shi­ this group. After about an hour we took a break was deeply impressed that he would shop bari, an elaborate type of Japanese rope "The Rochester Kink Society is a and Pam and I had a few minutes to share at Michael's for her! work. After she was suspended, he applied member-run BDSM organization in some thoughts with each other. We had a Pam and I left for some dinner and clothes pins to her inner thigh. She was Rochester, New York dedicated to open­ very similar reaction to what we had just came back to the dungeon around 10:30 giggling and cooing, and she looked like ness, tolerance, safety, and education. We heard. Basically, we were both surprised at p.m. for the play party. Surprisingly, I was she was having a blast. are a pansexual organization and do not how relatively gentle it was. Panther talk­ less nervous entering the dungeon for the At about 11:30 p.m. we said our discriminate on the basis of gender, sex­ ed about how the idea of being slapped play party than I had been at any of the "goodbyes" and our "thank yous," and we ual orientation, or fetish. RKS has male, or grabbed is often what is erotic, not other events. Everyone was so comfortable left. On our way out we laughed over a female, and transgender members who necessarily the pain. A little goes a long with us being there and learning about sign on the door that read, "This is your are single, coupled, and polyamorous. We way. The caring, loving aspect of BDSM RKS. I didn't know what exactly I was dungeon. Keep it clean." are Masters, slaves, Dommes, submissives, was reinforced for me repeatedly at this about to see, but I was no longer scared. A big thank you goes out to the Roch­ switches, Tops, bottoms, Leather folk, workshop. We entered the dungeon and found ester Kink Society. Thank you for teach­ fetishists, Goths, and others. Members The second half of the workshop about 70 people at play. The environment ing me so much about BDSM and for and guests are expected to attend RKS focused on nibbling, licking and biting. was much brighter and more casual than allowing me into your relatively secret functions with an open mind and mutual Panther donned his custom made pros­ I expected. The age range at the party world. I am grateful for your trust. respect, as well as learn and practice scene thetic vampire teeth and nibbled and bit looked to be about 18-70. Some people Calendar of events, photo gallery of etiquette. Come Play With Us!" • his capable assistant while she giggled were using equipment and involved in the dungeon and frequently asked ques- uncontrollably. This really wasn't at all scenes and others were drinking coffee what I expected, and quite honestly, Pam and chatting on the couches off to the and I agreed, it made us feel way kinkier side. Some people were nude, some were than we originally thought we were. dressed in elaborate outfits (ex. bust­ After the workshop, Panther displayed iers and heels) and others were in street some of his handmade floggers (see photo clothes. and check out his website at http://www. What it reminded me of most was pantherprowls.com) and Pam and I got a fitness club. Wait your turn, use the to hear some funny stories from mem­ equipment, moan or grunt if you need to, bers about saving money on sex toys by wipe everything down when you're done, shopping at Home Depot for objects like have some water and replenish. clamps, rope, and tubing. Pam and I found an empty seat in One man said, "Three strikes and order to observe the party. We were not they're out. The Home Depot employees the only ones watching. No play is ever asks me what I need the object for the first necessary at the dungeon. Some people time, I tell them something vague. They just come to enjoy the scenes. Some of the ask again, I make up something more scenes we saw were: detailed about some project I'm working A woman, wearing pants and a sports on. They ask me a third time, they get the bra, was chained with her front to the wall truth." He laughs. "Usually, they think while another woman tickled her gently I'm joking." with a feathery object. She was quiet. Hardware and everyday household A woman was chained naked, except objects are used in BDSM play quite for heels, to a post while a man and a often. They are referred to as "pervert­ woman ran electrical wands up and down ibles." LOL. Michael's craft store offers her body. She was squealing (in a good some necessary items for Todd and his way, I'm pretty sure).

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Anxiety • Depression Alcohol • Stress • Grief Shows Every Sunday Relationship • Family Plan with your host Wayne Esposito AKA Liza Rectification Work Holotropic Breathwork Show Time 8:00 PM • Specializing in work with $5 Over I $10 Under individuals andfamilies in Drink Specials All Night Long the Coming Out process Dance Till 2:00 AM

Martha M. Howden, csw, CASAC 496 White Spruce Blvd. May 2, 2010 Rochester, New York 14623 Aneal Pleasures Phone: 585 272-1760 Miss geelicious Fax: 585 272-8986 Sir Windz Most Insurances Accepted May 9, 2010 Mother's Day Brunch - No Show

May 16,2010 Veterinary Hospital Miss Gay Rochester Past & Present Andy Fleming, DVM Poison Waters - 2010 Aida Aponte-Lann, DVM Keke Valasquez-Lord - 2009 1311 Marsh Road Semantha Vega - 2007 Pittsford, NY 14534 Samantha Sulay - 2004 (585) 248-9590 , . '. . May 23, 2010 China as Tina Turner Norma A. Polizzi, Esq. Former Miss Gay Rochester Lauren Kyle Attorney and Counsellor at Law 2117 Buffalo Road, #112 . May 30, 2010 Rochester, New York 14624 . China E-mail: [email protected] Lauren Kyle Phone: 585-426-8866 • Fax: 585-426-4528 and many more surprises

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" .... tl ~ Pet Adoption ~~ Network Coming in June Center for Rescued Pets

Come visit our many rescued pets in need of loving homes! BtGWlOS Kasha Davis & Aggy Dune bring their 4261 Culver Rd impersonations to Downtown Sat & Sun 12 - 4 pm Robert Daniels Bring a copy of this ad 585-467-6456 & receive a FREE kitty Guaranteed playhouse - while Open 7 Days a Week supplies last! Clock Cleaning and Repair 384 East Ave "East End" I Rochester, NY 14607 PetAdoption Network.org 585.454.0152 I [email protected] 585-338-91 75 18 B THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

Union, RIT. Panel discussion 3 pm. Mari­ THURSDAY 20 [email protected]. An Evening with Yael Dayan. Israeli TH IRD PRESBYTERIAKI CH URCH Big Gay Prom: Starry Nights. LGBT writer and peace activist speaks at Temple May youth and allies, ages 13-23, 7-11 p.m. at B'rith Kodesh, 2131 Elmwood Ave, at ... acommuni!}' of diyerse p~ople the Strathallan Hotel, 550 East Ave. $10 at 7:30 pm on a two-state solution and the united !!x faifh in Jesus eh 1st, door. Jess Cohen, 244-8640 ext. 13. path to peace in the Middle East. Infor­ SATURDAY 1 who bather for meaninbful worship, MayDay SATURDAY 8 mation: 586-6862. Klea Blackhurst in "Everything the Free mammograms for women over FRIDAY 21 who share our blessings in service Traffic Will Allow", benefit for School of 40 with no insurance. 8 am-noon, High­ Civil Rights Front Rally for Harvey of others, and who strive to be the Arts. SOTA, 45 Prince St. 8 pm. $50- land Breast Imaging, 500 Red Creek Milk at Rochester City Hall. Information / $100; all tickets reserved; available at Weg­ Drive, Suite 130. 487-3300. at [email protected]. A PLACE OF WELCOME mans. Info at www.sotarochester.org. Empire Bears potluck. Asian food. 6:30 pm. Gay Alliance Youth Center, first SATURDAY 22 ! Rainbow Theatre Festival. "Nijinsky's Harvey Milk's birthday. National Last Dance." 8 pm, 243 Rosedale St. (New floor, 875 E. Main St. actions: www.equalityacrossamerica.org. Life Presbyterian Church). Also May 7, 8 SUNDAY 9 Linked by Love Walk at Market­ at 8 pm; May 2, 9 at 2 pm. Tickets $6-$12 Dignity Integrity: Roman Catholic place Mall. Meet 2 pm, Food Court. at Bread & Water Theatre box office or Liturgy of the Word. 5 p.m., St. Luke/St. Info: Call EROC at 278-4190 or 426- BreadandWaterTheatre.org. 271-5523. Simon Church, 17 South Fitzhugh St. 0862. ... and A PLACE where LGBT Empire Bears Bar Night at the Forum, Empire State Pride Agenda Spring 670 University Ave. Denim Night. TUESDAY 11 persons are welcomed as Inqueery: The Bible as a Weapon Dinner. Rochester Riverside Convention SUNDAY 2 to Attack LGBT People: Misinterpreta­ Center. Honoring Emily J ones. Reception fu ll partners in ministry Dignity Integrity: Episcopal Eucha,. tion. 7 pm. Location: InQueery under the starts 5:45; dinner and program 7 p.m. rist with music. 5 p.m., St. Luke's and Education tab at www.gayalliance.org or www.prideagenda.org; 212-627-0305. St. Simon Cyrene Church, 17 South fit­ call 244-8640 ext 20. Afterparty at Tilt. zhugh St. Just Us Guys. 6:30 pm, AIDS Care, SUNDAY WORSHIP Repeal "Don't Ask Don't Tell" pro­ SUNDAY 23 259 Monroe Ave. Discussion topic: Butt Dignity Integrity: Hymn Sing with test, Washington DC. For transportation 9:00am Third Church chapel Health. 223-2629. Tim Schramm, 5 p.m., St. Luke/St. info call Anne, 426-0862. East Avenue at Arnold Park Auditions for Boys in the Band. THURSDAY 13 Simon Church, 17 South Fitzhugh St. Needed: nine men ages 25-40. MuCCC, Second Thursdays. Social networking. WEDNESDAY 26 11 :15am Incarnate Word sanctuary Meet 5:30-7:30 p.m. at Mamooche Bistro, 142 Atlantic Ave. Info: Michael Arve, 271- Clara Engel at KC Tea and Noodles. East Avenue at Goodman 2087 or 489-1296. 384 East Ave. THURSDAY 27 RGMC Anything Goes Spring Gala. FRIDAY 14 Inqueery at Memorial Art Gallery. One Restaurant, 1 Ryan Alley, 4-8 pm, Empty Closet deadline for June. 244- "Depictions of Gender". $5. Pre-registra­ LGBT SUPPORT GROUP $35; couples $50. 585-473-1127. 9030 or e-mail [email protected]. tion required: InQueery under the Edu­ 7:30pm First & Third Mondays WEDNESDAYS Equality Rochester (EROC) monthly cation tab at www.gayalliance.org or call LGBT Safety. Workshop hosted by meeting, cocktails and dinner at 140 Alex 244-8640 ext 20. at New Life Presbyterian Church PFLAG, GAGY. Kelly Clark, facilitator. Bar & Grill, 140 Alexander St., 6 pm. The Lipstick Massacre by Michael 243 Rosedale (at Monroe) 7-9 pm, St. Thomas Episcopal Church, Todd Plank: 278-4190. Steck, directed by David Henderson, 2000 Highland Ave. SUNDAY 16 opens at Geva Theatre Center Nextstage, Finding Our Friends. Empire State Dignity Integrity: Episcopal Eucha­ 75 Woodbury Blvd., 7 pm. $20; 232- Pride Agenda network training; Webinar rist without music. 5 p.m., St. Luke/St. Geva or www.gevatheatre.org. www.thirdpresbyterian.org format. Contact Mary Zicari (585-271- Simon Church, 17 South Fitzhugh St. SUNDAY 30 2420) or [email protected]. lret Church MONDAY 17 Dignity Integrity: Roman Catholic S~king the Ught THURSDAY 6 International Day Against Evening Prayer, followed by "Pot Luck Gay Alliance Night Out At Geva. 4 Meigs Street (at East Avenue) 585.271.6513 Homophobia Picnic in the Park." 5 p.m., St. Luke's and "Five Course Love" by Gregg Coffin. $36. St. Simon Cyrene Church, 17 South fit­ Rochester, ew York 14607 6:30 private reception/pre-show discussion TUESDAY 18 zhugh St. with hors d'oeuvres. Show: 7:30. To order HIV Vaccine Awareness Day. Cel­ tickets, contact Colleen Brown at 585-232- ebration at noon, Damon City Campus 1366 ext. 3057 or e-mail to cbrown@geva­ ofMCC. ROCHESTER theatre.org. Mondays and Wednesdays 6 pm WEDNESDAY 19 Saturdays 9 am - Coffee After FRIDAY 7 Free screening of documentary "The UnBlood Drive. CampusOut and RIT Times of Harvey Milk" at Gay Alliance Meet at George Eastman House OUTspoken event on FDA discrimina­ Youth Center, 7 pm. Light refreshments. Parking Lot at 900 East Ave tion. 11 am-3 pm. Bamboo Room, Student Info: EROC, 278-4190 or 426-0862. FRONTRUNNERS All Fitness Levels Welcome FRONTWALKERS www.rochesterfrontrunners.org e assifie s

Classified ads are $5 for the first 30 words; each additional 10 words is anoth­ er $1. We do not bill for classifieds, so please send or bring ad and payment to: The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, NY 14605. Paying by check: checks must be made out to Gay Alliance or GAGV. The deadline is PLUMBIN G, HEATING, HYDRO RUSHING, SEWER CAMERA WORK Owne' owned and operated . Available 24 hOUfS 7 day<; 8 week the 15th of the month, for the following month's issue. We cannot accept ads Loyal. dependsbla. In bu"ness SInca 1977 over the phone. Pay when you place your ad. We will accept only ads accom­ RaSKJenbel lJnd CommsmlJl • Plumbing licensed 11304 panied by name and phone number. Neither will be published, but we must be able to confirm placement. The Empty Closet is not responsible for financial loss or physical injury that may result from any contact with an advertiser. Advertisers must use their own box number, voice mail, e-mail or personal address/phone number. Spectrum Internal Medicine ANNOUNCEMENTS waist, nonsmoker, d & d free, HIV nega­ Scholarship funds available. The tive. My 10 plus years experience guar­ Meet Our New Primary Care Physician Rainbow Amateur Radio Association, antees your relaxation and satisfaction. serving the GLBT community of ham Hotel visit, incall in my home or outcall radio operators since 1995, seeks a young in your residence. Reasonable rates. Dis­ individual who can qualify to receive cretion appreciated and practiced. Don't PECTRUM INTERNAL MEDICl E some college scholarship money, prob­ delay, call me today at 585-773-2410(cell) 1445 PORTL 0 E, S IT Efl302 ROCB ESTE R, N 14621 ably $1,000. Must be high school student, or 585-235-6688(home) or e-mail me at: PHO E - 585-922-5246 male or female, who intends to head to [email protected]. F X - 585-922-5343 college after graduation, and is either a ham radio operator currently, or enrolled FOR RENT in a class to obtain his or her license. House for rent. Atlantic-Winton area. Now A('('('ptillg N('\V Patj('llts For information, check out our web site: Ample parking off-street, yard, garden, www.rara.org; to apply, contact PO Box three bedrooms, fridge and washer. Year 18541, Rochester, NY 14618-0541. lease. $770 plus utilities. 224-9868 or SERVICES 654-5987. Occupancy June 1. Rochester's Best Man to Man FOR SALE Rubdown. Unwind with this degreed, Malibu outdoor lights. 50-foot string employed, fit, friendly, healthy, Italian of four. Brand new, never unboxed. $79 GWM. Middle aged, 5'8", 16 5Ibs., 32" value for $65. 385-7931. MAY 2010 • NUMBER 434 • GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • THE EMPTY CLOSET B 19

Second Thursdays Saturday Night Special Gay AA Social and business nerworking, 5:30-7:30pm. 7pm, Unitarian Church, 220 Winton Rd. S. Men Changing venues. E-mail [email protected] and women. Open meeting. Ongoing Calendar or oenyfingerlakes.groupsite.com. Lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf (LRAD) Gay & Lesbian Cancer Support Group Second Saturdays, 6-9pm. rcoaster@rochester. Second Thursdays, 6-7:30pm, Gilda's Clubhouse, rr.com Transgender Group 255 Alexander St. RSVP: 423-9700; info@ MONDAY Third Wednesdays. 6:30-9pm. 140 Alex Bar & gildasclubrochester.org SUNDAY LGBT Support Group Grill 140 Alexander St. second floor meeting room Parents Families & Friends of Lesbians and 34 Meigs St. First, 3rd Mondays, 7:30-9pm. FRIDAY Gays (PFLAG) Carol, 482-3832. Gay Alliance Board of Directors Gay Men's AA meeting Third Sundays, 2-4pm. Nopper Room, Gay Meets Third Wednesdays, 6pm, Fridays, 7:30-8:30pm, Closed meeting. Emmanuel Alliance, fifth floor, 875 E. Main St. PFLAG@ Lilac Squares Gay Square Dance Group 875 E. Main St. 244-8640 gayalliance.org. Mondays, 7pm, Open Arms MCC, Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. 740 Marshall Rd. 520-5358; New Freedom New Happiness GLBTQI Motorcycle Group GAGV Library & Archives, David Bohnett [email protected]. AA Gay meeting, 7pm, Unitarian Church, 220 Second Fridays, 5:30pm, Various locations. Cyber Center Winton Rd. Men and women. Open. RochesterGLBTI [email protected]; 478-1565; Every Sunday. 6-8pm. First floor, 875 E. Main St. Free syphilis testing [email protected]. 244-8640. AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave., 5-8pm. 442-2220. Support Group for Parents Who Have Lost Children Tawa Pano Unity Fellowship Church Rochester Historical Bowling Society SATURDAY First, 3rd Wednesdays, llam-12:30pm, Sundays, Warn, 758 South Ave. 617-4279 7:15pm, Mondays. Clover Lanes, Third Presbyterian Church, 4 Meigs St. Genesee Rochester Rams Bar Night 2750 Monroe Ave. (Group is full.) Region Home Care. Free. 325-1880 Third Saturdays, 8pm-2am, Bachelor Forum, 670 Dignity-Integrity 5pm, St. Luke'sISt. Simon Cyrene Church, 17 S. HIV Positive Gay Men Support group University Ave. 271-6930 COAP Fitzhugh St. Every Sunday, 234-5092 Every Monday, 5pm, AIDS Care, Come Out and Play. Business meeting last Empire Bears Bar Night 259 Monroe Ave. Wednesday. Equal Grounds Coffee Shop, 750 First Saturdays. Bachelor Forum, Open Arms Metropolitan Community Church 470 University Ave. www.empirebears.org. 740 Marshall Rd., Chili, 1O:30am. 271-8478 GAGVYouth Drop-In Hours South Ave. 7pm, John S., 261-7263. Mondays, Wednesdays, 2-6pm, GAGV Youth Empire Bears Frontrunners/Frontwalkers Gay Men's Alcoholics Anonymous Center, 875 E. Main St. Prince St. entrance, first First Wednesdays, 7:45pm, GAGV Community 9am, George Eastman House parking lot.www. St. Luke'sISt. Simon Cyrene Church, floor. 244-8640, ext 13. Center, 875 E. Main St., fifth floor. info@ rochesterfrontrunners.org. 17 S. Fitzhugh St. 8:30pm, 232-6720, Weekly. Closed meeting Frontrunners/Frontwalkers empirebears.org Empire Bears Poduck Mondays, 6pm, George Eastman House parking 2nd Saturdays, GAGV Youth Center, 875 E. GAGVYouth Group Rochester Rams General Meeting Main, first floor, Prince St. entrance. 6:30pm lot. www.rochesterfrontrunners.org. 2nd Wednesdays, 7:30pm, Bachelor Forum, 670 Ages 13-23. Every Sunday, 2-4pm, GAGVYouth greet; 7pm dinner. Bring dish to pass. www. Center, 875 E. Main St. or satellite location. For Steps Beyond Stems Crack Support Group University Ave. www.rochesterrams.com empirebears.org. weekly location check Youth Calendar, www. Mondays, 7-8pm, 289 Monroe Ave. Multicom-4 Coffee Talk Cross Dresser Support Group gayalliance.org or e-mail [email protected]. GAGV Library & Archives, David Bohnett 7pm, Spin Cafe, 739 Park Av. Social for former First Saturdays, 6-9pm, call for location: Rainbow SAGE Cyber Center Multicom-4 BBS members; other GLBT cyber 251-2132; [email protected] First Sundays: Euchre Club, 3-6pm. Third Every Monday. 6-8pm. First floor, 875 E. Main St. geeks welcome, every fourth Wednesday, 8pm 244-8640. Transgender Group Sundays, Potluck at First Universalist Church, 150 Brothers Keeper Last Saturdays, 2:30-5pm, Gay Alliance S. Clinton Ave., 4pm. Support group for men over 30. Third TUESDAY Communiry Room, 875 E. Main St., first floor Men's Cooking Group Wednesdays, 5:30-7:30pm, MOCHA Center, 107 (next to Youth Center). JustUs Guys Liberty Pole Way. 420-1400 Third or fourth Sundays, 355-7664. Gay men of all ages. Second Tuesdays, Guys Night Out 6:30pm, AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. 223-2629 GAGVYouth Drop-In Hours Third Saturdays. Social group for transguys. Ipm, Mondays, Wednesdays, 3-7pm, GAGV Youth Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. tguysnightout@ Civil Rights Front Center, 875 E. Main St. Prince St. entrance, first gmail.com. Every Tuesday, 7pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 South floor. 244-8640 ext 13. Ave. http://www.civilrightsfront.wordpress.com Married Men's Support Group Two Spirit Group Third Wednesdays, 6:30-8pm. 875 E. Main. Second Tuesdays, 7:30pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 Follow signs for "Charlie's Group". Scott, 585-244- South Ave. 8640 ext 20. AA Meetings in Rochester Every week there are four regularly scheduled PFLAG program meeting Frontrunners/Frontwalkers First Tuesdays. 7-9pm meeting. 6pm, Eastman House parking lot. GLBTI AA meetings in Rochester. St. Thomas Church, Winton & Highland. www.rochesterfrontrunners.org. CampusOut CofIee Night GAGV Library & Archives, David Bohnett Wednesdays First Tuesdays, 7-lOpm, Equal=Grounds, 750 Cyber Center New Freedom/New Happiness Group South Ave. Every Wednesday. 6-8pm. First floor, 875 E. 7 p.m. at the First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. Bus riders: Take the last #18 University bus to 12 Corners. Use the stop just past the top of the hill MOCHA Youth Drop-In Main St. 244-8640. at Hillside Ave. and before Highland Ave. Or take the #1 Park Ave. to the corner Tues.-Fri., 1-9pm, MOCHA Center, 107 Liberty THURSDAY Pole Way, 420-1400; 244-8640 of East and Winton, then walk five minutes south (uphill) on Winton. This is an Presbyterians for Lesbian and Gay Concerns open discussion meeting. All issues - as they relate to our alcoholism/addiction MOCHA Hepatitis Clinic 6:30pm, first Thursday. Ralph, 271-7649 and recovery - are fair game. Free Hepatitis A & B vaccinations, third Tuesdays, 5:30-7pm, 107 Liberty Pole Way, 420-1400 Queer Radical Reading Group First and third Thursdays, 7pm, Equal=Grounds, Fridays Rainbow SAGE Yoga 750 South Ave. Gay Men's 6-7pm Open Arms MCC, 125 Norris Drive, 7:30 p.m. Immanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. 442-6369. Pride at Work First Thursdays, 5:30pm. 167 Flanders St. off • Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and addicts Pride 2010 committee meeting Thurston Rd. 426-0862. • Men's meeting Third Tuesdays. GAGV Community Room, • Handicapped accessible GLOB&L 1st floor, 875 E. Main St. 6:30-8pm. Everyone This is a round-robin discussion meeting. If you are shy about meeting people or (Gays and Lesbians of Bausch & Lomb). welcome to plan Pride 2010 Guly 11-18). speaking up in a group, you will find this meeting particularly warm and inviting 244-8640. Meets every third Thursday in Area 67 conference room at the Optic Center. Voice mail: 338-8977 because everyone gets their turn to speak (or pass). As a result, this meeting Women's Community Chorus often runs long, so plan on more than the usual hour. Rehearsals each Tuesday, 6:30-9pm, Downtown Rochester Gay Men's Chorus United Pres. Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh Street. Downtown United Presbyterian Church, 121 N. Saturdays 234-4441, www.therwcc.org Fitzhugh St. 6:30-9pm, 423-0650 Saturday Night Special Free HIVTesting Free confidential walk-in HIV testing 7 p.m. at the First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. Bus riders: The #18 Every Tuesday, 9am-7pm. AIDS Care, 259 Every Thursday night, 5-8pm, AIDS Care, 259 University Ave. bus does not go by the church on weekend evenings. Take the Monroe Ave. Monroe Ave. 442-2220 #1 Park Ave. bus to the corner of East and Winton, then walk five minutes south Partner Bereavement Group (uphill) on Winton. WEDNESDAY First and third Thursdays, 5:30-7pm. Open drop­ • Open meeting, all are welcome, "straight-friendly" Tawa Pano Church Bible Study in session; professionally led. Freewill donation to • Mixed men and women Bible study 7:15pm. 758 South Ave. hospice requested. Lifetime Care, 3111 Winton • Handicapped accessible, take the elevator to the basement Road, 214-1414 Charlie's Group Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by open discussion. Third Wednesdays. Monthly peer-facilitated MOCHAlGAGVYouth Trans Group suppport group for married men who have sex First Thursdays, 5-7pm, GAGV Youth Center, Sundays with men. Confidential, free. 6:30pm. For info: 875 E. Main St., first floor (Prince St. entrance). Rochester Gay Men Scott, 244-8640 x 20; [email protected]. 244-8640 ext 13. 8 p.m. at St. Luke/St. Simon's Episcopal Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St. Bus riders Country Line Dancing/Two Stepping Catholic Gay & Lesbian Family Ministry use the Fitzhugh St. stop on Main St. at the County Office Building and walk Every Wednesday, Muthers, 40 S. Union, 7pm, Third Thursday, 7-9pm, School of Good Shepherd south one block. Lessons followed by dancing until 1Opm, Church, 3288 E. Henrietta Rd. 392-2862. • Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and addicts Beginners to advanced. • Men's meeting AQA • NOT handicapped accessible D.R. Pride Network Support group for transgender people of color. Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by open discussion. 7:30pm, Gamble Room in Rush Rhees Library. Third Thursdays, 5:30-7pm, MOCHA, 107 [email protected] Liberty Pole Way. 420-1400. 20 B THE EMPTY CLOSET • THE GAY ALLIANCE OF THE GENESEE VALLEY • NUMBER 434 • MAY 2010

WHAT DOES LIFE IN LAIIAMIE TELL US ABOUT IFE IN AM RICA 10 YEAR AT R1