The Cumberland Chronicle

February 11, 2008 Cumberland University, Lebanon, TN Vol. II Issue

The History of Love?

By Megan Lee Today’s Valentine’s Day is a commercialized holiday, complete with everything from jumbo boxes of candy to heart patterned underwear. Modern lovers scramble about during the early months of the year, trying to find the perfect gift for that special someone in time for the 14 th of February. Where did this custom come from? Why is this day used to symbolize love above any other day of the year? Most sources, like www.stvalentines.net, say the day is named for St. Valentine, a Catholic Bishop who lived in third century Rome. Claudius, the reigning emperor, believed that young men made less effective soldiers once they were married, so he outlawed marriage for men of prime fighting age. Valentine soon began to secretly marry the young couples who came to him. When this was discovered, Claudius sentenced the bishop to death. Imprisoned and awaiting execution, Names of saints were drawn instead of young women and young Valentine befriended the disabled daughter of his jailer. Shortly before people of both genders were allowed to participate. Now the youth his death, he wrote her a letter of thanks for her friendship, signing it were expected to emulate their chosen saint for the rest of the year. “Love from your Valentine.” The bishop was executed on the Obviously, the local young men were not pleased with these changes. February 14 th , 269 A.D. And other alternatives had to be found. Eventually, the Church decided Previously, mid February had been designated as the time for on only one saint to represent the day, Valentine, who had now the celebration of the Roman god of fertility and sensual pleasure, become the patron of lovers. Despite the Pope’s best efforts to bring Lupercus. During this festival, young men would participate in a religion to the day, the young people who celebrated it latched on to lottery is which they drew the name of an eligible young woman. This the romantic aspect of Valentine’s life more than his godly devotion. woman would be their sexual partner for the coming year. It was In the intervening centuries, young people began to use the day during the reign of Pope Gelasius that some changes were made to the as an opportunity to show affection to a special love, signing celebration. The Pope wanted to move away form the pagan aspect of anonymous notes with Valentine’s name. The first commercialized the lottery while still preserving some form of the yearly tradition. Valentine’s Day cards were sold in the early 1800s, and the money has (Continued on Page 5)

Stupid Things We Do For Love By Lindsey Cannon With Valentine’s Day fast approaching, I have been thinking about all of the dumb, stupid things people do for love. Do people really believe that altering who you are is really going to make someone truly love you? Maybe I should reconsider. Am I one of these idiots, too? I recently cut my hair – about five inches shorter – all to please my husband. This was particularly stupid on my part because I loved my long hair, and my husband is gearing up for a deployment tour to Iraq and is currently stationed in Germany. This “pleasing” my husband was only a temporary enjoyment while he was home on his leave. He doesn’t even live here to enjoy my new, short hair! And all you girls know how frustrating it is to be stuck with a length of hair you can’t stand. I guess for a moment I became one of those people who do stupid things for love. But thankfully, I’m not the only love-struck idiot that does stupid things for the one they love. Take a look at all these reality shows created by people who are just looking for love. From “The Bachelor” to “Rock of Love” to “I Love New York,” men and women (continued on Page 5)

Pimpology 101 By Ben Briscoe Welcome to class guys, today’s lesson, pick-up lines. The best use this line on a girl will result in way to learn when, where, and how to use pick-up lines is by trial and failure to a dramatic degree. error. To save you from several slapped faces, I’m here to give you I like your shirt. Will you go advice. I have been shot down more severely than the rejects from out with me? American idol. But like those really bad singers, I keep trying. This line might work on the So as a word from the wise here are a few pick up lines and most inebriated of girls, but in general their corresponding dos and don’ts. it’s a bit straightforward. This line Baby, my love for you is like diarrhea, I just can’t hold it in. might actually get you popped in the This is a don’t just on principle. While humorous, this line is mouth if the chick is of the feminist persuasion. actually quite disgusting. The only purpose this line might serve is as a (Continued on Page 5) joke when the topic of pick-up lines comes up. Any serious attempt to The Cumberland Chronicle 11 February, 2008 Page 2

Editorials CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC Was It A Super Tuesday? The Lesser of Two Evils By: Justin B. Bradford By Jeremiah Donnell In one of the most heated battles in recent years, Valentine’s Day is quickly approaching, but the Presidential Primaries on February 5 (also known as another annual tradition us just around the corner. “Super Tuesday”) lived up to the name. As thought by That’s right, tax day is closer than you think and few many political activists, there was no clear front-runner things can kill the romance quite as quickly as filing in the Democratic party. However, on the Republican side, while Mike an income tax return. Even if you get a refund, it Huckabee emerged as a contender by taking many southern states, only serves as a reminder of exactly how much you are forced to sending a shock to both John McCain and Mitt Romney, John McCain contribute to the continuance of the United States government. But what won big in many states giving him a huge lead in the delegate count. choice do we have? Surprisingly, there exists another method of taxing The race for the nomination on both sides is not over yet and will take the population called a Sales Tax. the upcoming post-Super Tuesday primaries to decide the candidates for As Tennesseans, we are intimately familiar with paying almost this year’s Presidential race. As most of the population knows, this 10% over the sticker price on practically everything we buy. The upside Presidential race represents the first time we have one major candidate of course is that we are spared the state income tax which plagues the that is a female and another that is a minority. Both of those candidates majority of the Union. The idea of a national sales tax is often heralded come from the Democratic Party. Some may ask why the Republicans as a “fair tax” for good reason as everyone has to pay it be they a drug are not running any females or minorities. Others may wonder if the dealer, prostitute, or illegal immigrant – people who traditionally don’t Republicans are just rich, white men. To that I say phooey. pay income tax but still shop at Wal-Mart. First of all, both parties are made of rich, white men. The rich Another attractive aspect of sales tax replacing income tax is its factor has nothing to do with which party you belong to nowadays. Both relative simplicity. In order to file at all, most people have to hire parties have women and minorities represented. Also, for anyone professionals to sift through the twisted labyrinth of forms and translate wanting to stereotype the Republican Party as rich white men, I say, “Do the arcane and obscure version of English used in the instructions. Not your research.” The Republicans in the Senate alone include five to mention the bureaucratic behemoth known as the IRS always lurking women, a Hispanic, and an Arab American. In the House, the in the shadows threatening to spring an audit on some unsuspecting Republicans have twenty-one female Representatives. Although, the victim. All of this needless complexity costs untold billions of the very Democrats do have more female representation in Congress. I will say tax dollars it is designed to collect. Ironically, because so many people that the government as a whole is taking a step in the right direction by rely on the income tax for their livelihood, it will probably never be having the largest number ever of females currently in Congress. The removed. question may also arise as to why there are not any female or minorities Some cynical critics (not me for once) claim people will merely running on the Republican ticket so let us take a look into that. go from cheating on their income tax to cheating the sales tax. Granted, There are many strong Republican females in Congress: Susan new regulations would have to be placed on catalog/internet sales, sales Collins of Maine, Elizabeth Dole of North Carolina, Kay Bailey Hutchison tax would have to be added to services, and a serious crackdown on of , Lisa Murkowski of Alaska, and Senator Olympia J. Snowe also of black-market purchases would have to occur, but at least the mega- Maine. Do any of these women desire to run for President? At this moment wealthy would not have any legal loopholes to exploit. in time, they do not. Can you blame them? It is one of the most stressful Critics also accuse a national sales tax of being regressive jobs in the world and it is something you must want and not just settle for. because it would be more burdensome on the poor than on the rich. Look at what happened to Fred Thompson; his supporters made him run but Proponents offer several methods of dealing with this perceived we could tell he really did not want to. Plenty of females have experience inequity. The most obvious solution would be to provide exemptions for in the Senate and some, such as Condoleezza Rice, have the worldly knowledge and experience to run. Many people just decide that being necessities such as food and housing thus aiding low income families. President is not for them or their family. So why should we blame the Another idea is to just refund a percentage of the first $20,000 or so for Republican Party for not having a female nominee? We should not. Not when every citizen by sending them a few hundred dollars each quarter. they could have chosen to run. Most people that are even remotely interested People who can afford to spend significantly more than that would do their research before starting a campaign. This involves polls therefore carry more of the tax burden which would help the poor. gauging support, and more importantly money raising ability. Although technically enacted in 1913, the Federal Income Tax When we look at minorities running for President, I must say expanded to the masses to help pay for World War I and we the people Barack Obama is a charismatic speaker that will have a successful have graciously been allowed to contribute ever since. However, it political career. One thing is for sure though; Obama is pulling off should be noted the 16th Amendment merely allows and income tax, it something that not many in his position could do. Obama is still a does not require one. Basic economic theory also flies in the face of an rookie Senator, having only been sworn into office in January, 2005. On income tax because it punishes work by taking more for every dollar you the Republican side, most of the minority Congressmen are rookies on make while a sales tax punishes spending thereby encouraging saving Capitol Hill, which means they would have gotten eaten alive by the and/or investing, both of which help the economy. Unfortunately, this more experienced candidates had they decided to run. particular change in policy does not seem likely unless someone like Basically what I am trying to get across is that it does not matter Hilary Clinton is elected and gets the chance to add a sales tax to the what the Republicans are offering on their ticket. Do not blame the income tax. party if someone decided not to run. I commend the Democrats for pushing through a female and a minority as it is something that will make history. Remember however, do not vote based solely on the fact that Hillary Clinton is a woman or that Barack Obama is a minority. You should vote based on the fact of what you believe and what the candidate believes. Voting based on sex or race not only makes you misinformed, but is a demeaning knock to any female or minority that wants you to vote for them based on their credentials and experience. As we push towards November, do your research and pick a candidate that you truly will follow and believe in whether it be Democrat or Republican.

Surveys answers will do little to change the world around me, I decided to fill By Kristi Galligan this one out because I was bored. I opened my Cumberland University e-mail last The administration of Cumberland should engage in dialogue night, and then let out a big sigh. I had a request to fill with the students of Cumberland. Have a round table of commuters, out a survey about the state of the university. I seem to returning students, seniors, freshmen, athletes and international students be getting lots of these nowadays. There seems to be a to talk about the strengths and weaknesses of students. For example, lot of talking about addressing student complaints but no action. Instead international students might wish for an experienced ESL tutor for of surveys, the administration should have round tables with a broad academic assistance. Commuters might want more parking. Several cross-section of students, audit classes with high student complaints, and round tables, conducted with open minds, will accomplish more than improve the infrastructure of Cumberland. Although I am certain my any survey. (Continued on Page 3) The Cumberland Chronicle 11 February, 2008 Page 3 Surveys (Continued from Page 2) I have taken several classes at Cumberland that were a waste of air conditioning did not work in several classrooms. It was ninety my money and time. I have worked hard both financially and degrees outside and boiling in class. I would not want my child to attend academically to afford going to Cumberland and I deserve a return for classes with no air conditioning and I certainly expect more from hard work. Most of my classes are challenging and interesting but a Cumberland. I have classes with broken window panes and enough dead select few are worthless. I am not asking for easy A’s. However, I do bugs scattered in the window sills to be a museum exhibit. I have classes expect my professors to be experienced and able to answer my full of broken chairs and dirty floors. Last year, I had a science class questions, and my work to be returned promptly. I do not expect with a lab attached. We could never have lab because of the lack of professors to lose my work or cancel classes regularly. These have all equipment. If Cumberland University wants to be a successful been problems in the past. university, it needs to look like a one. Right now, only Labry and the In the classes that I have had problems, students have first floor of Memorial Hall are presentable. complained. The classes are known, on campus, to have problematic Instead of using resources to build more buildings or partner with professors. Yet, I have never seen an administrator or a dean audit one of local private K-12 schools, Cumberland University needs to take a long, those classes to see if student complaints are valid. If Cumberland hard look at itself. Doing endless surveys are not solving the problems at cannot pay faculty enough to hire and keep experienced, hard-working Cumberland. Instead, the administration needs to talk to students and be professors then a hard look needs to be taken at priorities. more hands-on throughout. Go to some classes, eat in the cafeteria and When that hard look is taken the infrastructure at the university audit some of the classes. I have enjoyed my time at Cumberland and I definitely need to be examined. When the school opened this year, the am receiving a solid education and training for my future career. The university, though, can do better. It deserves to be great and it can be.

Arts, Entertainment, and Reviews

Great Date Flicks By Brittany Huffman 2. Mr. and Mrs. Smith a beautiful metaphor for marriage, spies, With “the day of love” soon tons of action literally!… Plus, Brad+Angelina=hot! approaching, many couples will be 3. The Princess Bride “Inconceivable!”, “Marriage! Marriage is what preparing to spend a romantic evening brings us together, today”, “As you wish!”… Ok so it’s not really an action with one another. And what better way film, but it does have Rodents Of Unusual Size! to spend the evening than dinner and a 4. Pearl Harbor the three-hour historical epic about the circumstance movie? involving America’s involvement in WWII which somehow manages to focus For you theatre-goers, here are a on a love triangle! few films that are already out or will be 5. Pirates of the Caribbean Depp. Bloom. Knightley. Enough said. by Valentine’s Day: 1. 27 Dresses – just your average chick flick with attractive people Romantic Dramas : Katherine Heigl and James Marsden, love, and drunken karaoke! 1. Shakespeare in Love because everyone knows that Romeo and 2. Juno – sure there’s plenty of witty one-liners, but there’s also a Juliet = true love! really touching description of true love! And it’s also the poster child for birth- 2. The Notebook because Nicholas Sparks=romance, Ryan control… literally!. Gosling and Rachel McAdams are seriously too cute, and the whole 3. The Eye – here’s one for those who believe in the whole “scare your coming in from the rain scene… date into your lap” type date-flick, and for you guys, Jessica Alba! 3. Pride and Prejudice because the night is not about reading a 4. Fool’s Gold – the re-teaming of hotties Kate Hudson and Matthew book! McConaughey as a treasure hunting couple…which means plenty of bathing 4. Ever After because the Cinderella story has been done about suit scenes! 3,278 times and never gets old! 5. Jumper – for those who would like to escape the romantic comedy 5. First Knight because forbidden love in medieval times is very and instead watch attractive people i.e. Hayden Christensen both discover and use teleportation! dramatic! 6. Definitely, Maybe – a romantic comedy about a father Ryan Reynolds who tells his daughter Abigail Breslin a story involving his past The Literary Corner loves, one of whom is her mother For those who would rather spend the evening at home, here’s a Valley of the Dolls - By Jacqueline Susann list of DVDs in no particular order that have topped the “great date Have you ever reached the top, flicks” charts plus a few picks of my own!: only to realize that the drive and the dream Romantic Comedies : of getting there was more exhilarating than 1. How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days the original Kate actually being where you wanted to Hudson/Matthew McConaughey movie with witty lines, a fun plot, love be. Valley of the Dolls is about three ferns, and the whole shower scene thing…need I say more? young friends that make it to the top and 2. Hitch Will Smith as a matchmaker who falls for the very begin making there long rapid drop to the attractive journalist Eva Mendes doing a story about him…immediate valley of the dolls “great date” classic! Lyon Burke was a handsome man 3. The Wedding Singer or 50 First Dates either one is great! The that all the ladies loved. When Anne, a only choice is ‘80’s or Hawaii? small town beauty queen, comes to New 4. Runaway Bride because there simply cannot be a “great date York to work for a talent agency named movie” list without a Julia Roberts/Richard Gere mention and I can’t Bellamy and Bellows, her heart is stolen by Lyon's good looks and witty bring myself to list Pretty Woman personality. With millionaires throwing their hearts her way, 5. You’ve Got Mail because there simply cannot be a “great date Anne keeps her heart strictly tied to Lyon. Anne and Lyon's love affair movie” list without a Tom Hanks/Meg Ryan mention and I can’t bring lasts a year before Lyon decides he is sick of city life and leaves Anne to myself to list Sleepless in Seattle become a writer, only to be reunited with her fifteen years later. Musicals : Neely O'Hara has genuine talent. She is out to find stardom and 1. Moulin Rouge! “the greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love in the big city of New York. With the help of her best friend, Anne, love and be loved in return!” Neely gets her first Broadway gig The gig takes Neely skyrocketing to 2. Grease “we’ll always be together!” the heights of Hollywood. However, with the glamorous life, comes 3. The Phantom of the Opera “the angel of music” versus “that’s stress and easily accessible pills that she and the girls like to call "dolls." all I ask of you” Finding her strength in the drugs not only keeps Neely going but also is 4. Chicago “he had it coming!”…ok, this one might be for what tears her friendships and her career apart. singles only! Jennifer is a successful actress, Talentless, but her success comes 5. Hairspray “without love, life is like rock-n-roll with no from her body. Sex is what sells for Jennifer. It pays for the bills and drummer” what little food she gets to eat. Jennifer seeks for love in the arms of Action with a Romantic Twist : strange, rich men, but really longs for the real love and talent that both 1. A Knight’s Tale knights in semi-shining armor, changing your of her friends have seemed to acquire. As the book progresses, she stars, Chaucer, a great soundtrack, dumb things done for love i.e. getting begins to age and slowly watches her money making body fade. hit in the chest over and over!, and a dance to “Golden Years”! Learn what drives the three girls to the edge in this thrilling chick story

about love fame and drugs. --- Charley Hodge The Cumberland Chronicle 11 February, 2008 Page 4

Fashion, Relationships, & Sage Advice

Why Law School? Love is a Splendid Thing By Helen Libanan By Sabrina Garrett Why law school? I have so many different Remember when you were little and your feelings tied up with my reasons. But somehow, teacher passed out valentines? Nobody wanted to most of all, I just seem to be driven by some need be left out but somehow Little Tommy always was. within me to become an attorney. Perhaps one of Valentine’s Day was not a good day for him. Now the reasons has to do with an emotionally shocking that Tommy is grown he believes that Valentine’s experience which nearly disabled me. Day is a stupid holiday created by the government Several years ago, my ex-husband attempted to take legal to rob us of our hard earned dollars. Still, despite their cynicism, custody of my two children. The case was being tried by a judge in everyone wants someone to love and spend that special day with. the small town of another state where my ex-husband grew up and his If you are already in a relationship the hardest part is deciding family still lived. At the time, I was unable to find any of the local how to celebrate it! Guys do not hesitate to be romantic or lawyers to represent me. spontaneous on February 14 th . Regardless of what your lady says she So I went to court without any legal representation. I loved my loves to be surprised with flowers and watch “The Notebook .” You do children and knew that they loved me. I took care of them the best not have to spend a fortune to create a memorable day. Make her way I could, and I knew that I was a good mother. I thought anyone dinner, leave her a love note on her car, and rub her feet. A lot of would recognize the truth of that. When the trial first started, I times the simplest gestures mean the world to us. However, if you do requested to set the trial for another date because I had not yet found want to add something extra-presents are always accepted! If you are an attorney. The judge denied my request, however. Up until that having a hard time deciding what to get here are some ideas: point, I had never truly experienced real fear. After eight and a half hours in court, the judge made his decision to award custody of my 1. Give her a bouquet of her favorite flowers. If you do not children to my ex-husband. know what her favorite flower is – go with roses. After this, I kept thinking about how helpless I felt during the 2. Do you know of a movie she has been wanting? Last year I entire process. I was frantic with wanting to understand how the legal got the complete set of “Sex and the City” DVDs. It was a system worked. I wished that somehow I had the knowledge, or the very non-traditional gift and showed that he paid attention skills that were necessary to resolve the greatest ordeal I had ever had to my interests. to face in my entire life. I thought that if I was an attorney myself, I 3. Find out what store is her favorite and get a gift card. If could find some way to solve everything by myself, and not have to you are unsure try either Bath and Body Works or depend or wait on some other person to resolve it for me. I felt that if I Victoria’s Secret. was able to do all these things I wished to do, everything would have 4. Make her a CD of all her favorite love songs or maybe even turned out differently. a scrap book full of picture of the two of you. During the next week, God finally heard my prayer, and I found an attorney who decided to help me. He immediately filed an Now being single on “V-day” is not fun and I have been there a appeal claiming that the trial was completely unfair. I wanted to few times myself. Still, just because you are single does not mean that believe him, but I no longer believed that there was true justice you should sit at home and eat a pint of Ben & Jerry’s. Get off the anywhere. couch, call up a friend and go see a romantic comedy such as “Fool’s Finally a year later, I learned that the Kentucky Court of Gold” (in theaters February 8 th ). You will not feel so alone while you Appeals had reversed every single decision made in my case by the are drooling over Matthew McConaughey. Around this time of year local judge ! This day I again believed that the legal system worked, many women have a Valentine in mind but often “chicken out” and and that justice could prevail. wait for the man to approach them. Quit wasting your time and do This event is what has motivated me even more to want to something about it! Men are not mind readers. If Cupid has recently become an attorney. I want to be able to prevent this kind of injustice hit you, why not use the holiday to change your single status? Surprise from happening to someone else. I am not sure how well I can do my your crush with a basket full of homemade baked goods. Trust me. job representing my clients, but I will always do a thorough search for Few men would turn down a hot woman carrying brownies. the truth, and do all that I can to see that they will be treated fairly. I Have fun this Valentine’s Day! Date or no date, do something would hate for anybody to experience the same kind of ordeal that I fearless and show the world that you have someone to love…even if it went through. is only your cat, Fluffy. This incident has also taught me to view the American legal system in a different way. I think I see it now more realistically. The legal system is not a perfect system, and sometimes it is no better than the people who have the responsibility for administering justice. But if you are in the right and continue to persevere, you will probably find that justice will prevail . I simply hope to become one of those people who can seek true justice. is honestly not as bad as it seems. It is not bad because the English department has some of the most amazing professors that you will ever have the pleasure What Direction is My Life Taking? of meeting. These professors work extremely hard to make sure each of their By Emily Keene-Reyes students learn above and beyond what the schools expectations are, and they Going to college can be a very overwhelming make learning … shall I say it—fun! experience for students, especially when they are uncertain The English department also has a free English Club that meets once a about what they want to major in and which direction they month, and they provide free pizza for all of the members attending. I don’t want to take in life. These are very serious questions to ask know of many programs that will feed your brain and your stomachs, so this is because these are the basic questions that will determine a definite plus! There is also an exclusive club known as Sigma Tau Delta, and which classes students will need take and which programs once you become an English Major you will surely want to join this fun group. they will need to join upon entering college. These students are actually more than just members of a club; they are like a Also, with tuition skyrocketing each year, it is easy to see why students family. This “family” will help make your English classes a hundred times have an even greater burden of trying to figure out which major is right for more exciting than any other classes offered at Cumberland, which is another them in the beginning of their collegiate career. No student wants to “waste” reason why you should consider majoring in English. thousands of dollars searching for which road they should take, when they are The best part about graduating with an English Degree is the road of the ones paying for tuition. The whole process can be extremely stressful! opportunity that will magically open once you graduate. The possibilities are Well, I am here to hopefully alleviate some pressure for students who endless for a person with an English Degree. You can work as a journalist for are visually and mentally creative, and who are not afraid of a challenge. You a local Newspaper, you can go on to larger things, such as editing, and become should consider getting an English Degree. a writer and or editor, you can teach English, or you can go into fields of Having an English degree can prove to be quite rewarding. Not only communication and do things such as marketing. Like I said, the possibilities do you learn the skills to communicate properly with anyone you come in are endless! contact with, but you also learn the appropriate ways to handle yourself in any If you haven’t quite figured out which direction your life is taking, you situation that presents itself. owe it to yourself to take a look into this amazing degree program. The So what are the requirements of getting an English Degree? Basically English Department is unlike anything you have ever experienced, and it will the requirements are simple. To obtain a Major in English, a student must definitely help open your eyes to a world you never knew. Do you have what it complete their General Core in addition to 37 hours of English classes, which takes to be an English Major? There is only one way to find out! The Cumberland Chronicle 11 February, 2008 Page 5

The Juice Stand Dear Betty Bulldawg By Imma Tellen Dear Betty, The world has once again stopped My friend called me a slut. I have two boyfriends spinning on its axis to watch Britney Spears neither of whom knows each other. I only let one on her slow fall of the pedestal of crazy ex- spend the night when I know the other one won't teen icons. “People” magazine reports that be around. I make sure that neither finds Spears begged her father, Jamie Spears, to evidence of the other in my room or anywhere take her out of the hospital, and she also angrily blames her father for else. Does this make me a slut? her recent hospitalization. The pop star is being held in the Stewart & Signed Playing the Field Lynda Resnick Neuropsychiatric Hospital at UCLA for a 14-day psychiatric evaluation. (It’s about time a professional realizes she’s No, it doesn't make you slut, but unless you are practicing crazy!) A temporary restraining order was also put on Britney’s pal, Sam polygamy and both of your partners are aware that you do, this secret Lufti, after Spear’s mother accused Lufti of giving her daughter drugs. lover thing is deceitful and wrong. I suggest you let the fellas know Lufti is not permitted within 250 yards of Spears, her home, her family, about your downfall. Your not married yet (or maybe you are, but lets or the hospital at which she is staying. hope not), so, dating around is not wrong. But make sure you let the Jennifer Lopez’s dad has confirmed that the singer/actress is guys know that you are unofficially dating around, not having a expecting twins with her husband, Marc Anthony. Apparently, twins run monogamous relationship. in the Lopez family; J-Lo’s father’s sister also has twins. Anthony and Lopez officially announced that they were expecting last November. Dear Betty, My girlfriend and I have been dating for 3 years now - we are Singer Fergie and fiancé Josh Duhamel have begun planning both going to graduate. I bought her an engagement ring and was their wedding. The two became engaged in December after dating for planning to ask her to marry me on Valentine's Day. Yesterday, she four years. However, a wedding date has not been announced. Fun Fact: said that she wanted to go to graduate school in Australia (and got Many do not know that Fergie (born Stacy Ann Ferguson) was the voice accepted). There is no way for me to go with her. Should I still ask of Sally Brown in several Charlie Brown specials as a child. her to marry me? Signed Stuck with a $2000 Rock Toxicology results were released early last Wednesday morning that concluded the death of actor Heath Ledger. The results stated that Looks like you’re caught between a rock and a hard place my Ledger, 28, died of an accidental overdose of prescription medication. friend. Long distance relationships are hard to keep up, but some people An earlier autopsy was inconclusive about the actor’s death. Ledger was manage. I don't suggest having a marriage if she is across the world for a laid to rest this past weekend close to his grandparents’ graves at the year or two. If you still want to ask her that's fine. She could answer one Karrakatta Cemetery in his hometown of Perth, Australia. of three ways. She could say yes and go, then you will have one or two years of waiting for her return, still say yes and stay here with you, or altogether decline your offer. If you and she are willing to wait it could History of Love? (continued from Page 1) turn out wonderful. been rolling in ever since. I love roses and chocolate as much as the next girl, but I believe Dear Betty, the bond shared between two people who truly care for each other is My boyfriend hates that I am still friends with guys that I more important than any gift. However you plan to celebrate Valentine’s used to date. How do I convince him that he has nothing to worry Day this year, please remember to show your special someone how about? much they mean to you. Keep them close, and your love may very well outlast all of the cards and chocolates. Signed Has a Past.

A good way to convince someone you are in a relationship with that they have nothing to worry about is to try and steer clear of the Stupid Things for Love (Continued from Page 1) alike are doing stupid things for a chance to find love. And every last other guy. Relationships are give and take. Sometimes we have to one of us is completely fascinated by shows like these. My question is choose what is more important, putting your beau through hell and back, how can you not fall in love on these shows? trying to convince him that he means more to you than the other guy or The participants are going to romantic beaches, drinking lots of dropping your buddy so you can have a comfortable relationship. A lot “liquid courage,” having every luxury imaginable, and competing for of the time when you are in a relationship it’s hard to still have a close love, which only means they never show their bad side in fear of getting friendship with an ex. booted off of the show. With conditions like that, any one of us could fall in love with some washed up celebrity, too. Dear Betty, Cutting my hair short for the temporary high of my deployed I think your answer to Wanting a Straight Girlfriend was off husband is beginning to sound more reasonable by the minute, compared base. Hating someone because they are gay is just evil and you to reality star “New York.” She has had several runs on reality shows should condemn her for wanting to try and change her. How can before finding “Mr. Boston” and turning him into her own “Mr. Right.” you tell this girl to still be friends when she obviously doesn't know As crazy as it may be, maybe we are all idiots who do stupid things for a or care what her friend feels? chance at love. Signed Intolerant of Hatred

First of all, I would like to apologize for offending you with my Pimpology 101 (Continued from Page 1) reply. My intention with each answer is to offer unbiased advice. Can I borrow some change? ‘Cause my daddy told me to call However, condemning anyone is not the right approach to any him when I found the girl of my dreams. situation. The truth is that easily being offended and the exile of others, While this is one of the smoother lines on the market, it has because they are different, plays a big part in the wars of this world. become a little aged. The popularization of the cell phone has made the I suggested that they should remain friends although she didn't agree use of a pay phone a thing of the past. Even still, this line is still a with or understand her friend’s choice of lifestyle. Ditching her friend popular favorite of players world-wide. instead of learning to understand and love her it would cause major issues like arguments, rumors, or a bad name for what it is she believes Regardless of the line you choose to use, you must realize that in. they are more humorous than serious. Trying to be smooth will never work. Girls can smell an agenda a mile away. The only way to successfully use pick-up lines is when the desired reaction is a laugh. Got Questions? Let Betty Help While lines and good humor can often get you a date, a relationship and happiness cannot be guaranteed. Blissful love affairs only blossom from Send Your Questions to Betty: [email protected] individuals mutually interested in interacting with each other. Often the most successful of these relationships start with the female taking the initiative.

The Cumberland Chronicle 11 February, 2008 Page 6

International, National, & Local Interests Australian Woman Spontaneously Switches Blood Type By Rick Brown

Most ordinary organ transplant patients face great challenges after their operations. With their new organs in place, almost all Brennan, who was O-negative, switched to O-positive, and patients still require constant cocktails of anti-rejection medicine to tests would reveal that cells from the liver had actually moved to her stop their immune systems from rejecting the foreign organs. For bone marrow. As the cells moved into the marrow, where new blood Demi-Lee Brennan, however, no medication will be needed. Nine cells are produced, the donor’s immune system actually began to take months after her transplant, she lost her own immune system over. Oddly enough, the anemia was not the result of organ rejection; altogether – and switched blood types. instead, it was the product of the few remaining cells of her original Brennan, an Australian citizen, was nine years old when she immune system. Realizing the problem, doctors withdrew the anti- lost her liver to a virus. Given a short life expectancy, doctors rushed rejection medications and simply allowed the new immune system to to find a transplant to save her. The only one available had a catch, dominate completely. however – it was of a different blood type. In usual circumstances, this Today, Brennan is doing fine and well. She is the only organ would prevent a transplant from going forward. The prospect was a transplant patient ever to take on her donor’s immune system and dangerous one even without such considerations. Liver transplants, blood type. With her body now in sync with her liver, she no longer which were only first performed in 1963, are usually a last resort. One needs any anti-rejection medication. out of every ten patients dies within the first year. Even when the Doctors cannot explain how Brennan managed such a operations are performed, they’re usually only done after detailed metamorphosis and recovered. Specialists at Westmead Children’s patient examinations. Hospital, where the transplant was performed, can only offer Brennan’s precarious position necessitated a bold move, suggestions. According to Dr. Michael Stormon, a hepatologist however, and doctors took the chance, transplanting the liver of a treating Brennan, it may be the result of a “sequence of serendipitous twelve-year-old boy into her body. Brennan seemed to fare well. After events” such as a post-operation infection that allowed the new cells to the operation, doctors treated her with the first of a lifetime’s worth of multiply unfettered. Dr. Stuart Dorney, former head of Westmead’s anti-rejection medications. The dosages worked, and for a time, she Liver Transplant Unit, suggested it might be the product of the youth seemed to be progressing normally. of Brennan and her donor. In any case, doctors are hoping to Everything changed in nine months, however. Brennan began eventually study the case, in the hopes that her unique outcome might to develop critical anemia, and as doctors probed to find the cause of become that of other transplant patients. it, they were shocked to discover an entirely different revelation: It is a possibility Brennan welcomes. "It's my second chance at Brennan had changed blood types. life,” Brennan said, describing her amazing change. “I would say to other transplant patients, stay strong and determined.”

Meet the Administration

Jason Brewer, Assistant Dean of Admissions & First Year Programs By Jeremy Jenkins On top of these duties, Mr. Brewer serves on eight committees Although Jason Brewer on campus and teaches an Introduction to Business course. He loves was born in South Bend, spending time with is two sons, Dylan, 3 ½, and Daniel, 1 ½. Indiana, and raised in When asked about his experiences at Cumberland, Jason Jacksonville, Florida, he calls Brewer replied, I love Cumberland. My experience at CU as a student Lebanon his home. helped mold me into the person I am today. CU does a good job of In 1998, Mr. Brewer helping students grow up, and I like being a part of that. I am always enrolled in his first year at here to interact with the students and help all others to gain what I Cumberland University to be a have. That’s why my door is always open.” part of the original wrestling team. Throughout his Sexual Health Awareness Day memorable time as an Sponsored by Student Counseling undergraduate, he was a member of the Omicron Delta Kappa Leadership Society, President of Services the Pi Gamma Mu Honor Society, and a member of the cheerleading team. th In fall of 1999, he decided to pledge the When: Thursday, February 14 fraternity, and went on to hold the offices of Grand Master of Ceremonies and Grand Master (President). During the summer of Time: 11:00 a.m. – 2:00 p.m. 2000, between his sophomore and junior year, Jason Brewer married Where: CU Cafeteria his high school sweetheart, Kelly. All of these experiences helped mold him to the dedicated and organized individual he is today. He graduated in 2002 with a Bachelor of Arts in Humanities and Social Sciences. Pick up information, ask questions During the summer after he graduated, he was hired as an and win prizes by playing Sexual Admissions Recruiter for Cumberland University, as well as working on his Master of Science in Public Service Management. After Health Jeopardy!! completing his Master’s degree, he was promoted to the Director of Admissions. In August 2006, he accepted an offer to become the Assistant Dean for Students. Representatives and information from With this new job title, Mr. Brewer was responsible for Student Affairs, Student Life, Greek Life, and all clubs/organizations. Planned Parenthood, Nashville Cares However, in August 2007, the Admissions department called him back and CU Student Counseling Services will for his services along with a new title as Assistant Dean of Admissions & First Year Programs. be available. He currently oversees the recruiting process, the processing of applications and transcripts, along with heading the peer mentor freshman program, making freshman’s schedules, and FOCUS (Freshman Outreach Committee Uniting Students). The Cumberland Chronicle 11 February, 2008 Page 7

Games, Technology, and Innovation

Daunting Task: Building a Computer By Tim O’Guin To many people the idea of Plugging all the power cables into the right spots is usually as building their own computer sounds simple as reading the manual that comes with the motherboard and/or crazy, something only skinny, acne- looking at all the labels printed on the board itself. Most connectors and ridden supergeeks would do in their sockets have missing pins and notches that prevent you from plugging mother's basement – bent over a table components in backwards or with the wrong cable. If you can assemble like the Hunchback of Notre Dame a bookshelf from Big Lots, then you can probably assemble a computer. soldering capacitors onto a breadbox, all The benefits of building your own computer are numerous. Most while drinking Mountain Dew, eating cold, two-day-old pizza, and OEM computer manufacturers use proprietary components that can somehow humming along with the latest Aphex Twin album. That's not make upgrades costly and painstaking. A good example of this is a the way things are anymore. Anyone who has half a brain when it manufacturer that uses a non-standard layout for a case, so when the comes to assembling things and following directions can do it. power supply goes bad, for example, you are forced to purchase an There aren't many components involved in the building of a PC. overpriced and inferior power supply from that manufacturer instead of There's the case that houses everything. Then there's the motherboard having the freedom to get a good one from the likes of companies like that is the basis of the system, a board with labeled connectors and Antec or Thermaltake. Most OEM motherboards will often include sockets to plug in all the rest of the components. The CPU – Central fewer expansion slots for add-on cards than a higher quality Processing Unit, more commonly referred to as just the “processor” – is motherboard. Also, they often tend to integrate as many components as basically the brain of the computer, a square chip where all the number possible into the motherboard. While this may sound good, such crunching is done. The power supply is the unit that actually converts components are usually made cheaply, which often accounts for the low the wall outlet's AC power to usable electricity for the motherboard and price of most computer systems. all the components. The RAM – Random Access Memory – is where When it comes time for your next computer system, exercise application information is stored and moved around while the machine is your freedom and learn some new things in the process. With any luck operating. Everything in RAM is erased when the computer is turned at all, you'll come to better understand that mysterious box sitting under off. Storing data permanently is the responsibility of the hard drive, a your desk. collection of magnetic platters in a small enclosure. Then you have optical drives such as DVD and CD burners. The components to control video, sound, internet, and network connections are often built into the motherboard itself. The key to properly building a system is knowing what different types of connectors the motherboard has and, therefore, what will work with it. A motherboard labeled as a Socket 775 will work with an Intel Pentium 4 or Core 2 Duo processor, whereas a Socket AM2 will work with an AMD Athlon 64 or Athlon 64 X2 processor. If the motherboard says it accepts DDR2 RAM, well, that's the kind of RAM you get. It doesn't take much research to find out what works with what; everything is identified properly and the different connection types are typically made clear.

You CAN’T Park There! By Jaclyn George Students on Students and faculty alike should not park in areas that are not campus have recently designated parking or with no parking signs posted nearby because you dealt with many parking will be subject to being fined. violations being issued, Sporting events and graduation create the most congestion in CU due to parking parking lots. The university reserves the right to block off certain areas regulations being during these events and if you are looking for a parking spot during then, strictly enforced after good luck. Cumberland is growing and while additional parking has not the first week of classes yet been added, perhaps the administration will see fit to add more soon. this semester. While the rules are the same as they CU Baseball (Continued from Page 8) were in the fall, there His presence at the plate, as well as behind the plate will be sorely had not been such a missed. Another catcher lost, but to injury and not graduation is Kyle stream of enforcement West. West hit .307 with 1 HR and 17 RBI in 47 games. Also lost to during the fall semester. injury is Eric Mull. Mull a pre-season All-American tore his Achilles While this is all for the during a practice this spring and will be forced to use a medical red-shirt safety of students, it can be a little annoying to walk out to your car and because the injury required surgery, and will not heal in time for Mull to find a warning under your windshield wiper. play this year. Mull hit .370 with 20 HR and 86 RBI. Also gone is So, what should you do? Make sure you have a parking sticker Courtney Propst. Propst hit .342 with 9 HR 43 RBI and 16 stolen bases displayed on your car because if you do not you are subject to a $25.00 in 58 games last year. fine. If you have moved onto campus after being a commuter during the The Bulldogs first home game is February 15 th against fall you need to make sure you get a new sticker for your correct parking Valley. Conference play will start February 29 th at Trevecca. Trevecca area. is expected to be the Bulldogs biggest challenge in route to a Conference It is also important that you do not park in handicap spots title. Conference play continues just about every weekend for the because the police can become involved, which will result in a serious remainder with home dates in March landing on the 7th , 8 th , 29 th , and ticket and a heavier fine. 30 th . Conference home dates in April are the 5 th , 6 th , 24 th and 25 th . The Students who commute to Cumberland University have also run full schedule is available on line at www.cumberland.edu . The schedule into a few parking woes. On Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings also includes which games will be broadcasted on WANT/WCOR as it is a little difficult to find a good parking spot. While some students did well as what games will be webcast. complain in the fall about there not being any parking spots open, this is CU opened their season on the road this past weekend in rarely the case. Everyone cannot have front row parking. Due to the against Faulkner and Auburn-Montgomery. Results were not number of commuters, faculty, and staff with various schedules there available at the time of print. should be parking available. The Cumberland Chronicle 11 February, 2008 Page 8

The Dawg Pound Sports, Stats, & Scores

CU Baseball: Bulldawgs Picked to Win TranSouth As the Cumberland Baseball team starts the season, Diekmann hit .392 with five home runs and 52 RBI for expectations are high. Picked to win the TranSouth Conference, and Tallahassee CC in 2006. Along the way he picked up a few awards ranked 8 th in the preseason NAIA National poll, the 2008 CU Bulldogs including; First-Team All-Panhandle Conference, NJCAA Region VIII will look to improve on their 2007 lackluster trip to Lewiston. Last Gulf District All-Region, and All-Gulf District Baseball Team year the Bulldogs made their fourth consecutive trip to the NAIA Jiles saw limited action at Sacramento State due to injury. He World Series in Lewiston, Idaho but went 0-2 and were eliminated. appeared in only 14 games and hit only .067. Jiles is expected to hit Last year’s Bulldogs went 48-20-1, 19-7 in the TranSouth Conference leadoff for the Bulldogs this spring, as well as patrol centerfield. His to finish second behind Trevecca University. The Bulldogs redeemed speed and power make him a dangerous mix as a leadoff man. themselves in the Conference Tournament, beating Trevecca to Key position players who are returning for the Bulldogs are; advance to the Region XI championship which they won for the fourth Clint Alexander, Austin Morgan, Jeremy Wilson, James Lilley, Jason year in a row. It was then on to the South Central Super Regional Bush, and Preston Potter. Championship which the Bulldogs also claimed for the fourth year Alexander is a DH/1B who it .370 with 11 HR and 71 RBI last year. running. Wilson still only a junior hit .350 with 4 HR and 35 RBI while playing The target on the back of the Bulldogs has gotten even bigger the outfield. Austin Morgan filled some big shoes last year at this year with additions in many key positions. CU welcomes fifteen shortstop, taking over for Victor Alvarez. transfers to the roster this spring. Highlighting those transfers are In doing so Morgan hit .308 with 2 HR and 33 RBI. Lilley, former Friendship Christian and Walters State CC catcher Michael Morgan's partner up the middle hit .299 with 3 HR and 30 RBI. Bush Wheeler, UT pitcher Lance McClain, University of Florida pitcher hit .267 with 4 HR and 35 RBI while playing mostly right field, he is Eric Spivey, San Diego State infielder Brian Lucas, Tallahassee CC expected to stay in the outfield this season but may play left or right outfielder Zach Diekmann, and Sacramento State outfielder Nick Jiles field. Potter patrolled centerfield last year and hit .216 with 1 HR and Wheeler transfers to CU after winning the Junior-College 12 RBI. National Championship at Walters State CC last year. Wheeler, who Returning pitchers are highlighted by Robert Clayton, a senior right was drafted by the Kansas City Royals in 2006, had committed to play hander who went 12-3 with a 2.93 ERA and 60 strikeouts in 104 1/3 at Kentucky but for various reasons chose to play at CU instead. innings. Also expected to see a lot of starts is Anthony Fomasi. Wheeler hit .413 with 16 home runs and 68 RBI last year at Walters Fomasi a left hander was 6-1 last spring with a 2.76 ERA and 52 State CC. strikeouts in 58 2/3 innings. Out of the bullpen the Bulldogs return McClain spent last season as part of the starting Matt Madigan and Aaron Tant. Madigan was 2-2, with a 4.66 ERA, 3 rotation. He went 6-5 with a 4.46 ERA in 20 appearances for the Vols. saves, and 35 strikeouts in 38 2/3 innings. Madigan is expected to take Spivey spent last season at Central Florida CC posting a 10-3 over as the closer filling the spot vacated by Adam Tomlinson. Tant, record with a 3.56 ERA, and 88 strikeouts in 96 innings. Those stats used mostly in middle relief was 5-1, with a 4.28 ERA and 55 earned Spivey the Mid-Florida Conference Pitcher of the Year title. strikeouts in 61 innings. Spivey, who graduated from Belleview High School (FL) in 2003 Three incoming freshman are also expected to make an spent his freshman season at Florida before back surgery forced him to impact. Infielder Tyler Fisher, outfielder and catcher Mario Perez, and use two red-shirt seasons. outfielder Kumar Piar are all expected to make large contributions to Lucas who played for former San Diego Padres star Tony this years Bulldog team. Gwynn at San Diego Stat, hit .299 with 1 home run and 25 RBI in 45 Gone from last year’s team is several impact players. Pitchers games. Adam Tomlinson, Zach Whitmer, Karl Mejlholm, and Myles Anderson combined for 21 of CU's 48 wins last season. Several position players were lost as well. Luis Martinez, who was drafted in the 12 th round by the San Diego Padres, hit .370 with 13 home runs, and 63 RBIs while catching most of the season .(Continued on Page 7)

Cumberland’s Classified

Personals For Sale Now Hiring Stuff Wanted Want Love? Too busy to find Looking to off load stuff? Skip Looking for Something Special? the Perfect Person on your Own? eBay and try Cumberland’s West Main Realty is looking for See if anyone on Campus has one Run a Personal Ad in Classified – save on Shipping & a part-time receptionist for they’re willing to part with. Cumberland’s Classified. Handling – Sell Locally Saturdays only, 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. with a one hour lunch. No charge for CU students, Just email a description of who No charge for CU students, Compensation is $8/hr. Faculty, & Staff you are looking for to: Faculty, & Staff Interested applicants can stop by [email protected] 1104 West Main Street in Send your ad & contact into to: and let the Classifieds do the rest Send your ad & contact info to: Lebanon or inquire by phone at [email protected] – all ads are subject to editing for [email protected] 615-444-7100. clarity and class. Have a job you need done? Find your next employee through Cumberland’s Classified – reasonable rates

For more info: [email protected]