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4-1927
Volume 4, Number 8, April 1927
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This Newsletter is brought to you for free and open access by the Douglas and Judith Krupp Library Special Collections at Bryant Digital Repository. It has been accepted for inclusion in Booster (1925-1929) by an authorized administrator of Bryant Digital Repository. For more information, please contact [email protected]. i\pril 1927 THE BOOSTER
Published the Fifteenth of Each Month by the Students of BRYANT-STRATTON COLLEGE Providence, R. I.
SUbieription Price SSe per half-year $1.00 per year Single copies, 10e.
Aeeeptanee for mailing special rates of postage provided for in Sectioll lloa. Aet of October 3. 1917, authorized October 17, 1924
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF EUGENE R. JACQUES
ASSISTANT EDITOR EVELYN ROWSE
ASSOCIATE EDITORS News Editor, WILLfAM McNALLY Exchange Editor, THOMAS LISI Athletic Editor, VINCENT A. CONNORS Business Topics, PAULINE EBBITT The Jester's Wit, EUGENE R. JACQUES
CLASS REPRESENTATIVmJ BEATRICE NOAKLEY ANNA L. KNOWLTON CECILfA LAMB ADDIE GOULET MARY M. MULLANEY CARMEN O'NEIL
BUSINESS MANAGER RICHARD A. TAYLOR
ADVERTISING MANAGER ROWLANDI BROWN
BUSINESS STAFF GEORGE E. CREATH JAMES MURRAY VINCENT T. CURRAN GEORGE HAWKINS
FACULTY ADVISORS WARREN C. LANE. C. P. A. JEANNETTE CARROLL CHARLES H. PEASLEY, A. B., A. M. :..!IIUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIlIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111'11111111111111"11111111111111"11111'111'111"11"1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111 THE BOOSTER General Business Department Issue Volume Four APRIL, 1927 Number 8
~nml1ll"liinliiiiilllii'iiiilll"llIill'il'lllll l lllll II' i llllllill!lliiilllii,llllilll,ml l l lillllllll,lll,1lIIIIIIIIl l lll""I ' ,II!I,lli'II'!II"',I,"IIIII"ill1111111111111111,1111111111111,11'11,1111111111111111'1111111!11111'llnnnmmmrmnlllllllllllllllllllilll','I',111IIIIIIIilllllllllllllllllir NEEDLESS THOUGHT SPRINGCOMERS GREAT many successful men and women N the Spring of the year many of us are A have told us that conservation of I accustomed to leave the week's monot forces, both physical and mental, is one onous surroundings and keep tryst with of the most important lessons in accomplish ?\1:other Nature's yearly blossoming. ment, and without havin~ learned this lesson Alone with her, be it on hill, valley, moun we are quite sure to fail in much that is de tain, river or plain, while standing, walking', sirable. sitting or riding, we experience that inde Many of us, however thoug'h consistent in scribable feeling, deep within us, that incites conservation of physical forces, are careless our soul to higher aspirations and excites concerning the mental; more prodigal it our interests to accomplish bigger and bet would seem than with any other faculty. It ter things. is a uni ,reI' sal extravagance, this though~less Among' these Spring-comers, are the birds, expenditure of mental force. So many tunes the flowers, the leaves of the trees, and the we recklesslv consume it on what is of no rushing' of fresh waters. At this time, we large or lasfing importance of value what can easily understand the poet's flow of lan ever, only to find the supply exhausted when guage, the painter's flash of brush, the musi the real need comes. cian's impulse of song' and the writer's squib A well-known writer and speaker on im bling. For earthly souls, born to enjoy the portant subjects tells us that the first step in world, mnst feel the forceful environment of conserving forces, physical or mental, ,is to these scenes, and feel the transfusion of de learn to control thoug'ht, for so much of our lirious life flow into their own veins. It force extravag'ance is the result of confusion comes then even as the trees and flowers of thought-a lack of control. come to meet tbe birds of tbe air, and the This would suggest the regulating of our grass to meet the insects of the field. thoughts in much the same manner as we do Thus is wearieu man rejuvenated each our material tasks when tlley accumulate be new year, for we, in our weekly pilg'rima~es yond our power of accomplishment. That is are just an example of all mankind who takes to say, we cast aside the needless ones. How advanta,ge of conh'acting the Springcomers' much mental force is wasted on thoughts that exhnaration. These Spring messengers are are of no importance, at least not really as good friends to us as any we may claim worth-while thing's? and far more valuable, since we know they If we could cast out all needless thought, will never fail us, neither will their effect as we lay aside all unnecessary tasks, just ever be disappointing'. think of how much more mental force we Man, dj:fferent from the rest of nature, not could conserve for the really important issues because he has a soul for all nature, but be of life. cause he must live and not hibernate throug-h the dreary winter was not left out altog-ether SAVE YOUR BOOSTERS when Mother Nature distributed that ingred ient which spells new life, for 11e is ever HE BOOS'rER is the living record of our caught UD in the intoxication of the earth's T school days, our struggles, and our rebirth with tbe arrival of spring'. achievements. It keeps treasured UT) Hail to the most g'lorious season of the for us permanently the essence of days which year!-E. R. J. appear commonplace to 111' now because we are so near them, but whi.ch will he fascina.t SUCCESS NUGGETS ing to look back upon when we will have left them forever. "THE successful man is the man who has The file of Boosters we collect now will tried, not cried; who has worked, not be the most important aid we can have litter dodged; who has shouldered responsi on in keeping our school experiences fres]l jn bility, not evaded it; who has g.'otten under mind. Begin saving them now. Put thi. the burden, not merely stoon off, looking on, issue where it will not be mutilated or lost, g'iving advice and philosophizing
If Page Two THE BOOSTER
The Baseball Be a Loyal Season has School News Rooter of Begun the Team
BETA SIGMA CHI HOLDS BASI{ETBALL PLAYERS RE STUDEr T HEAR CHAMBER OF ANNIVERSARY BANQUET CEIVE GOLD BASKETBALLS COl\UiERCE SECRETARY Warren C. Lane Presented With Coach D. O. McLaughry of Brown Richard B. Watrous Emphasizes 1m· Token of Appreciation at "Iron Men" Fame Makes Pre· portance of Industrial Survey Fraternal Gathering sentation at Special in ~ew England Assembly Meeting On Wednesday evening, March 23, The ninth in a series of talks given 1927, the second anniversary banquet A special assembly was called on by prominent business men and edu of Beta Sigma Chi was held in the Friday afternoon, April 1, 1927, for cators was given by Richard B. Wat Hotel Dreyfus. There were a large the pm'pose of honoring the members rous, ecretary of the Providence number of active and associate mem of the basketball team at the close of Chamber of Commerce, on Friday bers present. Mr. R. Lucien Appleby, a successful season. afternoon, :\larch 19, 1927. President of the Fraternity, aoted as The honored guest of the occasion The ubject of his lecture was en- toastmaster. was Coach Damond O. McLaughry, titled, "Industrial Progress in New The chief speaker of the occasion coach of the Brown football team, England." Mr. Watrous emphasized was Warren C. Lane, Dil-ector of the which carried away more hO'l1ors dur- the importance of an industrial sur-. Business Administration Department, ing the past year than any other foot- vey which is being taken in Providence who spoke on "The Purposes and ball team in the East. After a short to investigate conditions as they exist Principles of a Fraternity as Related introduction by President Harry Loeb at the prel'ent time. to Everyday Life." At the concl~sion Jacobs, Coach McLaughry proceeded I He enumerated the various activities of his talk he was presented Wlth a to give the students a short talk 01"' and services rendered by the local leather wallet suitably engraved as a the value of sports in college. chamber to the community at large tloken of appreciation for all that he Upon the completion of his address and also went on to say t hat its pur has done for the Fraternity in the the members of the basketball team pose was to develop business in Provi past. were individually presented with a dence and encourage outside concerns A review of the year's work was gold basketball suitably inscribed as to locate here. . given by Secretary Fred R. Fishlock. a token of appreciation from the col- Throughout his lecture a fine sense Other speakel's included Mr. Henry J lege for the successful season which of humor was noted and the students Lee and Mr. Harold E. Adams. they made possible. The members of are in hope that they may again have During the evening, entertain:"l1ent the second team who deserved merit the opportunity of hearing Mr. Wat was furnished by Miss Evelyn Me were presented with "Letters." Those rOU'3 fipeak in the near futUl'e. lilieu, dancer; Miss .Jessie McCrea, so members of the first tea Last year our Exchange department A rooster discovered an ostrich egg was ::nade a special feature of our and rlolling it into the hen house, said, paper. Our ex:change list was devel "Now, ladies, I' do not want to e::n oped until, at the present time we barrass you, but here's a sample of have listed exchanges filom over one what other folks are doing." hundred schools and colleges. We find that our school has been ad Popular saying: "You're about as vertised extensively just through our useful as a glass eye peeking through Exchange department, and it giVes us a keyhole." great pleasure to be able to read a school paper from some distant part The hobo is just as intelligent as of our country and find The Booster other people, \only he cannot express mentioned in its exchange ctolumn. himself, therefore he has to go by We learn a gn~at deal from these freight. papers. Hints on how to improve our paper, bits of news items that help to make our own school life more in t.! lasslcal mUS1C ~s tha t which threat- The girl who manies the oatmeal teresting. ens to be in tune, uut alWayS 01S- salesman will never run short of mush. We recently received a letter ask appoints ~· ou. ing permission to quote certain mao Always keep something for a rainy terial which appeared in The Booster POPULAR SONG .linS day, even if it is nothing more than on the pages :of the "College Co::nics," the umbrella that you borrowed. published by the Du Pont Publishing "I Want to Uet lVIal'l'ied, bue My Company of Chicago. Wile Wom Let Me." An A::nel'ican officer was drilling Thus our advice to other school" : "lVly Wue is Llke an Aeroplane, She a Russian regiment. He sneezed and "Develop your Exchange department. Ain't No Uood on j!;arth." the men answered "Here." You have everything to - ain and noLh "I Wish I Was What I Ain't In ing" to lose." stead at What l' Am." You can't tell. Perhaps a fish goes home and lies about the size of the bait he steals. AS OTHERS SEE US A passenger on a Southeln train, lOOKing unoer his berth one mormng, round one black s hoe and .one tan, Parting advice--put a little water The Dickinsonian, Carlisle, Pa. and summoned a porter. on the comb. "Weare always on the lookout for The porter scratched his head in The Booster. Not only is it newsy bewilder'ment: "Well, it dat don't Napoleon said there is no such word and alive but it contains interesting beat aU! " he said, "Dat's the second as can't. We wonder if he ever tried bits about everything tOf general in time dis ::nawning dat mistake's hap to strike a match on a cake of soap? terest." pened!" The Tech Review, Providence, R. I. Man advertising his lost Ford: -"Although we have received only TOOK NO CHANCES "Lizzie, come home. All is ~orgiven." one of your magazines since our last issue, we find it, as usual, up. to your "I love you! I love YiOU!" he mur ·Patrick Henry was a man who got high standard." mUl'ed for the nineteenth time. what he went after. He said: "Give "Speak; answer me!" me liberty or give me death," and he The Hi-Times, Lexington, Ky. The maiden coyly hung her head. "I got both of them. "You have a good editorial depart -oh, Tom; this is so sudden!" she ment. Your jokes are very funny and pleaded. The calendar is a success because original. Judging from the oontents He drew her close to him. it is up to date. of your magazine you have a wide "Don't be afraid, darling," he said awake school." gently. "Would you like me to ask " I' can't make my grades," said the your mother first " student as he shifted intb second. With a sudden cry of alarm, L BIG BUSINESS threw her arms around his neck. . "No, 1~0!" she gasped. "Mot her is "Give him the air, he's going to sing over the radio." A Florida real estate man who was a widow and I' want you myself!" always coming home with tall stories of sales running into thousands and "Why are we so late?" asked the hundreds of thousands of dollars, was AN ANNOYING VISITOR woman of the conductor. The con aCClosted one evening by his son, aged duct\or explained geniaUy: "Well, 11, who announced : The man and the girl were saying madame, the train before us is behind, "Well, Dad, I've sold the dog." good-night on the doorstep when a and besides, this train was behind be "You've sold the dog" window above them was pushed sud fore." "Yup." denly open and a weary voice said, "What for?" "My dear sir, I have no objection ti~ No, Dora, jU'3t because wheat is sell "For ~10,(}OO." your coming here and sitting up half ing at a dollar a bushel, you cannot "Ten thousand dollars! What are the night With my daughter, nor even call it buckwheat. you talking about? Whoere's the your standing 0'11 the doorstep for two money?" hours saying good-night, but out of Mix tin and copper and you have "I didn't get mloney, Dad. I got two consideration :flor the rest of the bronze; mix tin and brass and you $5,000 cats for it." household who wish to go to sleep, have a road hog, will you kindly take your elbow off the door bell? Thank you." The reason some men leave ,home There was a young girl from Savan Is because they can't pay the rent. nah, Who on the pavement slipped on a A CURE bananah, WE WONDER? And since that day Whenever you're angry, I'm sorry to say Pretend you're a bird, Where fire goes when it goes out? She stands up when she plays the And sing just a little, Where fi shes go when they go in piannah. But don't say a word. Seine? THE BOOSTER Page Five Business 60 ics. THE SUCCESSFUL DOLLAR ALPHABET OF SUCCESS WOMAN'S INDEPENDENCE Plant a crop. Nothing happens. A-ttend carefully t!o details. A comparatively few years ago all Nothing' that one can see. B-e prompt in all thing'S. women wel'e supponed oy men. But Be patient. The seed sprouts. C--onsider well, then decide posi- dudng the pase decaae womall 11... " stalk pushes its way through the tively. striven to attain her independence. earth. Still no sign of fruit. D-are to do right, fear to do wrong. She has been very successlu1 m he,' Be patient. Leaves come out. Buds E-ndul'e trials patiently. actIvity in this mrect!on. open. Berries begin to form. Still F-ight life's battles bravely. The dependent woman of 192,7 lc..u:!s no harvest. G-o not into the society of the a life 01 uncel tail1ty it her nU',,/Janll Be patient. The fruit fills out. It vicious. or father leave, her without suppo].t, ripens. It matures. H-old integrity sacred. -what then 'f 1£ she IS wit.rout Pl-O Harvest at last-miraculously in I-njure not another's l·eputation. fession or vocation she cOllstandy huS creased from a little handful \of seed. J-oin hands \only with the virtuous. worries for the future. She is not Reaping financial reward also takes K-eep your mind free from evil prepared for the yeals to come. She patience. thoughts. l'S not prepared tor the crises that Savings come to so little. Interest L-ie not for any consideration. are inevitable. grows so slowly. M-ake few special acquaintances. With the trained woman the out Be patient. The farmer waits N-ever try to appear what you are look on life can be a great deal dif through seasons for his crop. Rais not. ferent. She has the satisfaction of ing a fortune i'" a matter of succes O-bserve good manners. realizing that when her male provider sive seasons. P-ay your debts promptly or protector can no longer care tor Be patient. Once it begins to ma Q- uestion not the word of a friend. her, she can care for herself. ture, your fortune co:nes with a R-espect the c!ounsel of your l'larents. These changes in woman's status rush. S-acrifice :noney rather than prin- have been brought about largely by ciple. the advent of the flapper. N!o one WI.SE MEN SA Y- T-aste not intoxicating liquors. knows from where she came; but the U-se yonI' lei'sure for improvement. important facts are that she did come That little men have short tempers. V-enture not upon the threshold and that she did make woman's life That it is not work that kills men; of wrong. a great deal different and more re it is worry. W-atch carefully your temper. assuring. That if you and your job are not X-tend to every one a kindly greet friends, part company. ing. That the longer you live, if yrou live Y-ield not to discouragement. SHE WINS right, the less you will think of your Z-ealously la'i::lJr for the right, and 'Self. success is certain. "What are you doing?" asked t he That following the line of least re teacher, observing a new game. ""\VeIl, we're seeing who can tell sistance is what makes rivers and TO OUR ADVERTISERS men crooked. the biggest lie; the winner gets a That detelwination reduces hard piece of candy." A codfish lays a million eggs, "Why, I never told a lie in my work to nothing, procrastination While the helpful hen lays one. makes hard work out of nMhing. life!" cried the teacher. But the codfish does not cackle "Give her the candy!" That to keep watching, to keep To inform you what she's done. working, to let the brain and hand go together-that is the secret of suc And so we sctorn the codfish, George Creath of the Business Ad cess. The helpful hen we prize, ministration Department refused to Which indi·cates to thoughtful minds, get into a friendly checker game t he SOUND ADVICE rt pays to advertise.-E. R. J. other day on the grounds that he would have to- :nove." If you set a ti:ne--Meet It. Hawkins: "Even angels swear." If you make a promise-Keep It. Curran: "How do you know?" FINDIN GS-KEEPINGS If you owe a bill-Pay It. Hawkins : "Well, what does St. If you speak a word-Mean It. Peter say t!o the folks who come there Old Lady: (To boy playing in mud If you have a task-Do It. by mistake?" If Yiou have a job--Hold It. puddle) : "My child! Get out of t hat If you have a fault-Correct It. puddle at once!" If you want to get ahead-Go to It. SOMETHING NEW Little Fellow: "Aw, go find a pud If you want knowledge-Get It. dle for yourself. I saw this one I you have a bad habit-Quit It. A German scientist recently maJe first." If you love friendship-Cultivate LL .the statement that people will soon If you have any common sense- be able to read their newspaper'S, soak BEWAILMENT OF A VETERAN Use It. them in acids which will extract the flood value of the wood pulp, and then She took my hand 'So frequently, An Irishman and his wife were at proceed to eat them for lunch. TIl(;' I thought she sure was meant for the theatre for the first time. The Booster has already been placed on me. . . wife noticed the word "Asbestos" sale in the lunchroom which goes to She took my can(l-- every bme, printed on the curtain. prove that the future success of this I could locate a single dime. "Faith, Pat, and what does Asbes publication is assured. She took my money when she could tos on the curtain mean?" If I had only undersl!.ood! "Be still, May, don't show your A mule and a Ford are said to She took my dates most every night ignorance. That's the Latin word have met on a highway. Thought that she would treat me for Welcome." "And what might you be?" asked right, the mule. She "took on" thus, 'til finally, She took my rival, 'stead of me. Teacher: "Wll!:> was the greatest "An automobile," answered the inventor" Ford. "And you?" Pupil: "An Irishman by the name "I'm a horse," said the mule. They Remember this-you can't "put it of Pat. Pending." both laughed. over" by "putting it off." Pa~e Six THE BOOSTER A FORCEFUL REMINDER (By Beatrice Robinson) Midnight! The awesome hour! The ~:)p of the stairs with military preci little village of Essex lay buried in SIOn and SUleness. Upon reacrung L .." __ ,..... "" ,. slun1ber. top he pau'sed, and the lower half o~ The great :l1ansion of Henry New his face, which was unmasked broke comb was shrouded in darkness-not into a horrible murderous grir:. a" . a light being visible in any of its mas drew a baby Colt revolver from hie sive windows. Within, all was still, hip pocket. BASEBALL the monotonous ticking of grand At Ne:wco::nb's room he stopped, and father's clock alone broke the dread by a qUlck turn of the knob, he quiet Coach "Jimmy" Hart started base mystery of the fearful silence. ly entered the room, and without a ball practice several weeks ago. Due Suddenly from the rear of the 80und he approached the sleeping vic to poor weather conditions, the team library a mysterious noise was heard tim. He then arrested his steps and has been handicapped in securing the as if somebody had tripped over a bent over the quiet form. Something needed amount or practice. Coach chair. l"or a while, all was 8ilent must have distUl bed the man's slum Hart, who coached last year's cham again, and then the noise increased In bel', for he stirred a bit, lopened his pionship team, is hi::nself a player of volume. Sure enough, somebody was eyes and met the grinning counten promise in this vicinity. Last year prying open the library window. ance of this '"inister being. while playing on one of the leading Slowly but surely Lne window was Shiveling with fear, he managed to amateur league teams in Rhode 1s raised, whlle a liVIng form was sil inqU1 re what the inbuder wanted. He lan, he won the batting championship houetted in ·the baCkground. Suddenly was answeled thus: "Ah, Newcomb, I for the season, and received several a man wa'.;; astride on the sit! with a see you don't remember me. Prob attractive offers to enter professional flashlight in his hand flashing to and ably you don't reme::nber that night baseball. His ability as a player and fro in the dark room. In a cllitlike back in '98 when the city was drowned a coach is unquestioned. manner the Intruder swung himself in a tonent of rain, and my wife and This year's team shapes up remark from the sill to the floor, walked I received you into our house as a ably well. 1'he majority of last year's towards the door ,of the library, and friend and brother." veterans have graduated, and Coach flashed his light up and down the cor He paused as his voice ~ook on a Hart must build practically an entire ridor. menacing note. " Newcomb!" he ly new team to take the field this Apparently being satisfied with hissed, "Newcomb!" He straight year. At the present time the prob what he saw, he drew a paper from ened up and his voice became harsh able line-up for the early season hi's pocket and by the aid of his light and loud. "I come here tonight to games will be as follows: read the words, "Last room at head find out when in the thunder you're Taylor and Hinckley ...... catcher of stairs." Thrusting the note in his going to return the umbrella that you Feinberg, Emmett and Barone .... pocket, he proceeded to tiptoe to the borrowed! !" . . , ...... pitcher Lundgren ...... first base FIRST GAME CALLED OFF ATHLETIC IDEALS Roberts or Stowell ...... second base Allenson ...... shortstop On Tuesday, April 5, the team was "Fair play" should be paramount in Furey ...... third base supposed to have opened its official athleLIC'il, not Only because of its glJocl Capt. Annotti ...... left field sea'Son playing Commercial High morally, but also because It is the nest Bourbon ...... right field School at Davis Park. Players from policy. Pollard ...... centre field both teams were on the field and a Anyone going into a game of any We wish to make mention at this good crowd was on hand to witness kind "thmking right," tnat is, ready time a few interesting sidelights of the game. Shortly before ga:ne time to give everything he has without a the players. a severe hail and rain storm came tw,t of intended "dirty work" in his Feinberg and Emmett are well up, which forced calling off playing mind, has a gleat advantage over the known semi-pro pitchers. Taylor dis this game. The excellent showing one wh.o tries to see what he can "get tinguished himself as a remarkable made by the student body was pleas by with." athlete while attending Cranston High ing to us, and we are in hopes that School. During the past winter he they will follow their team and lend " Never take undue advantage," has been a member of one of the their support whenever possible. should be a byword of every athlete. semi-pro Hockey teams which played It means that an athlete will never at the Auditorium. Lundgren, at first TEAM HAS NEW EQUIPMENT "razz'- an opponent no matter how base, has quite a reputation as a ball tempting the situatIOn. A good sports player, and was a member of the man will never revert to personal re This year's team has been complete marks to get the best of his opponent. Glenlyon Amateur League Tea::n last ly outfitted with new uniforms, and year. Stowell and Roberts were mem These should be Epme of the ideals of their equipment is complete in every all participants in athletics. bers of last season's basketball squad. detail. We want to have as many "Arty" Allenson, at shortstop, was The "rooters" should also be gov members of the student body attend erned by similar ideals. Yells should selected unanimously by the sport the home games as possible. These writers last year as the best school never be given when the oppo!lents games will be announced on the are trying to give signals. When a boy shortstop in the state. Furey, at blackboards, and personal announce third base, is a veteran from last man on either team is hurt a yell ments will also be made a few days should be given for him. Never fail year's team. Little is known of the before the dates on which they are to ability of Bourbon or Pollard, but in to cheer for a player who merit'S it practice they both look good. Captain be played. regardless of which team he is play Annotti is well-known for his hitting ing on. Players should never be ability, and is a very good fielder. All Optimist: "When is the best time "razzed" no matter what they do. in all, the team looks to be strong 1ll to marry." If the students of any school will practically every department, ann a Pessimist: "If you are young, not accept and live up to such ideals as successful season is anticipated. yet; if you are old, never." these they will find themselves lead ers in athletics although they may never win a game as they are the CAR OWNERS! ideals of true sportsmen. PLEASE TAKE NOTICE SISTERLY LOVE The Baseball Manager has an attractive proposition for all base He loved to teach the girls to swim, ball fans who can secure cars and who would like to accompany Oh, yes, he'd taught a flock. the boys on some or all of their baseball trips. See him today! But when hi'S sister asked his aid, He pushed her off the dock. THE BOOSTER Page Seven THE SONG OF SPRING In my IOpinion Spring is the most "Not What Shall We Do, But What Can We Do?" delightful season of the year. Dur ing this period the world seems to r ejoice in one great joy after an MR. PEASLEY SAYS: other. Everything suddenly seems to beco:ne alIve. The sun releases the thick coat of ice covering the river "It is not what we wish lets, and the babbling brooks begin their joyful song. The brilliant col to do with ourselves, but ored bilds return from the Sunny what we CAN do with our South, and are often to be seen flying to and fro in search of material to selves best." build theIr new homes. As soon as the sun sends its warm rays down upon the flower beds, the WHAT CAN WE DO daffodils, snowdrops and tulips imme diately awake, and shoot up through BEST? the '-loft brown turf. In a short time they blossom into the most gorgeous In what capacity can we colors imaginable. CHARLES H. PEASLEY, Early in March in the country, one best serve our fellowmen, A.B., A. M. can hear the steady drip of the sap into the shiny pails hung on the amI develop to the u tIDost Director of General Business trunks of maple trees. · When one our highest powers ~ Department sees boys with their m:;trbles and girls with their jump ropes, he is This is the question which confronts every young sure to realize that at last Spring has man and woman who is about to cross the threshold arrived. The housewife appears in her .lust cap and everyone seems tio of life. The answer not only involves the welfare of have the "cleaning fever." the individual, bat directly affects the progress of the l't is during this wonderful season that one finds himself building castles worhl, for ciyilization will reach the high water-mark in the air ·wishing he were something only when ea('h man and woman has chosen his or her more than he rcally is.-B. N. proper LIFE WORK. ln cllOosing an occupation do FAIRY TALES not ask yourself how you ran make t11e most money "My price for the suit," said the or gain the most notoriety, but cllOose that ·work which tailor, "is $100. but it isn't worth a ,,'ill call out all your powers and develop your penny over $25." manhood into the greatest strength possible. Keep in "Another word frdm you," cried the mind tllat characte]' is grQater than any career; that henpecked husband to his raging wife. "and I'll bounce the coal scuttle loff manhood l ' greater than wealth, and grander than your ear ." fame. "Yes." said the great theatrical pro ducer, "I shall close the play to:nor LAUGH WOULD-BE CRITICS row night . Of course it is making big money, but I feel that it is not "Laugh and the world laughs wit h Mr. Peasley advocates that the pu real art." you, cry and you weep abne." How pils of the Ofike Practice Depart many of us have heard this old say :nent should study their spelling ulli "No," said the tishe"man, "I never ing and laughed as ·we heard it? But gently and in a mor e t horough man caught a really big fish in all my how many ever stopped to consider ner. These are examples of sentences life." the real truth there is in it? Cer which they submit for approval. tainly lan","';np' never did anyone any l-Many of girls have had their "You have !,pen the house from top harm and who ever heard of "weeps" hair amputated. to bottom." s::lid the l'eal estate agent. and melancholiness doing anyone any 2- The ostracize is a bird noted for "and I st"l.1ngly advise you not to buy good? Laul!'hs are infectious,-if its plumage. it." one laughs, then so does an!Other. 3-William, one lof the best cus Hapoiness is not so plentiful in t his tomers of the Office Practice Depal't "Nonsense." cried the professional old world of ours that we can't afford ment, is a saccharin boy. pugilist. "I dnn't want a penny if I to do our bit and invent a little more. 4-A certain girl on the seventh win. '!'he fame itself is quite So remember to smile. laugh and be fl oor is considered very beautiful be enough." cheerful. In other words just "Bright cause of her vermilion hair. en the Corner Where You Are!' 5-Delightful beverages may be a EFFICIENCY NOTE combination of nitro-glycerin and car A FEW "JACKS" bolic acid. A soap company, which also manu 6~Some of the f air flappers' face, factures perfume. offeren a prize for Apple Jack look as tHough they had been pul a slol!'an. One slog'wfl which dii! nn~ Flap Jack verized. win the pl';:>:e W'l.S: "If you don't us(> Jack and the beanstalk 7-Arable Ground is a NICE our soan for Heaven's sake use ou" The h:nuse that Jack built girl. perfume." High, low Jack 8-We wonder why her cuisine is Steeple Jack viRitin P' so often. Farmer: (About to leave for citv)' Lumber Jack 9- Mrs. Lamoureux instructs us to "Do you want me to brinq you any T;nion Jack nlace :>n pxtre:ne marg"jn on the left thinq from thp ('ity today?" Jack of Hearts. Soades, thll <; allowing a varillition of the tripli His wife: "Yes, vou might brir" Diamonds and Clubs cate. -THE LUDICROUS HALF-DOZEN me a jar IOf that traffic iam that v"" .Jack of all Trades. read so much arout in the papers." Bite off more than you can chew, A nut at the steering wheel, a peac'h Wealth has wings but it doesn't Then chew it. at his side, and a sharp curve in the have any tail that you can put salt Plan more than y'ou can do, road is a good receipt for a fruit on. Then do it. salad. Page Eight THE BOOSTER BACK·FENCE GOSSIP NOT SO FUNNY TOOK NO CHANCES Question on Psychology Quizz: A lady stepped into the ticket of "What causes laughing?" fice to purchase a ticket to New Bed One bright pupil wrote: "A laugh ford, handing the agent a twenty is a peculiar (!ontortion of the human dollar bill in payment. As he hand countenance, voluntary or involuntary, ed her the ticket, he remarked, super-induced by a concatenation of "Change at Fall River." Her prompt external circumstances, seen or heard, reply was, "None of that, young man! of a ridicullous, ludicrous, jocose, I want my change NOW!" mirthful, funny, facetious or fanciful nature, and ac(!ompanied by a cackle, ALWAYS BROKE chuckle, chortle, cachinnation, giggle, Irate Parent (to George): "I'll gurgle, guffaw or roar." teach you to make love to my daugh The weather may change ter, young man." And so may the sea, George Creath: "I wish you would, Carlson: "What people are scat- But you'll never find old boy; I'm not :naking much head tered all over the world? Any change on me. way." Campbell: "Pedestrians." Mr. Barber reminds us that the laws AN ANCIENT APPLIANCE HE WAS RIGHT are supposed to represent the wili of the people, but that tcj;) often they Teacher: "Johnny, name an island represent the will of the wrong Gulski: "Name a modern appliance in the southern Pacific ocean." crowd. used in ancient times." Johnny: "Hawaii, teacher." Hamilton: "The loose-leaf system Teacher: "I'm all right. Answer The only difference between a in the Garden iof Eden." my question." taxidermist and taxidriver is that the Johnny: "Hawaii, teacher." latter 'skins a higher class of animals. Mr. Watson-"Now these nouns are Teacher: "I told you I'm all right. masculine, these are fe:ninine, and For the last time answer my que.5- MATII GENIUS these are neuter." tion." Explanation is greeted by blank Johnny: "Aw, teacher you're full Policeman (Investigating Accident) : looks from class. .of beans." "So you saw the accident, sir? What Mr. Watson-"I don't believe this Teacher: "Philippines? 'l'bat'8 was the number of the car that class knows a neuter noun when it right, Johnny. Take your seat." knocked the man down " sees one." Mr. Goulding: "I'm afraid I've for Conley-"Well, they are all neuter WANTED gotten it, but I remember noticing me." that if it were multiplied by fifty, the Stenographer for special work after cube root of the product W!-luld be ECONOMY hours. Prefer one who has no col equal to the sum of the digits l'e lege education, a'S the work will re versed." "Pat, I am sending your waistcoat; quire correct spelling and punctuation to save weight I have cut all the but and the use of common sense. The cat has nine lives tons off. Your loving mother. But· isn't it right, "P. S. You will find the but';ons "Mother, have you a nickel f,or a That a frog's just as good, in your upper left pocket." pOOl' old man?" For it croaks every night? "Where's the poor old man, my Mr. Lee: "A fool can ask more son ?" EVOLUTION questions than a wise man can an "Down at the corner selling ice swer." cream cones." A:nbition of 1870--A gig and a gal. Cranston: "I guess that's why I 1920--A flivver and a flunked my math exam." Doctor: "You need less walking flapper. and more sleep." 1950- A plane and a A son at college wrote to his Patient: "Tell it to the baby." jane. fatber: "No mon, no fun, your son.' If you have nothing to say, don't Hunting is like hash-you have to The father answered: sar it. have confidence to enjoy it. "How sad, too bad, your dad." THE BOOSTER TENNIS-GOLF-BOATING-BATHING-DANCING COLD SPRING HOUSE WICKFORD, R. I. A cool, comfortable family hotel on the shores of Narra:ganseft Bay, Excellent Accommodations. Reasonable Rates. 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