Veldhoven Nominated: Order of Nova Scotia mherst resident, longtime gay rights activist and Wayves Acolumnist Gerard Veldhoven has been nominated for the Order of Nova Scotia. Born in the Netherlands, he has been active in many issues re- lating to the LGBT community. “His work has been recognized to promote understanding and acceptance not only in his community, but throughout our province at large that has left Amherst, Cumberland County and Nova Scotia a far more accepting place to inhabit for every single resident,” says MLA Brian Skabar. “Gerard has made Nova Scotia a better place; as a parent, a commit- ted partner, a volunteer, a community leader and pioneer for human rights.” As founder of the Cumberland Pride Society, Veldhoven has continu- ally worked along Amherst town of- Protest In Moncton ficials in a quest for raising awareness By Nathan Adams movement will show the government how and celebrate diversity. He contacted protest was held outside Moncton much the people of New Brunswick oppose the long-term care facilities throughout the City Hall on Wednesday, March 30 abolition of the Council, and that it can help province to raise awareness in those A in the hope of stopping the abolish- convince them to reverse their decision to cut facilities in order to gain equal treat- ment of the NB Advisory Council for the it. “I am hoping that people who are driving or ment for senior LGBT community Status of Women. The goal was to get as walking by on the way home from work will see members. His article, “Equal rights in many women and supportive men to at- the protest and ask questions, find out about a Just Society,” has been recognized Veldhoven at St Patrick’s Day Irish Stew Supper at Menz Bar tend, with the women wearing bandannas the closure of the NB ACSW or, if they already and he has presented this at special in Halifax, hosted by Safe Harbour. Photo by Anita Martinez. over their mouths. The women carried signs know about it, galvanize them, and inspire them speaking engagements. Promoting stating “NB Women Silenced by Alward,” to take action,” she said. gay- and grand-parenting is also a favourite granddaughters, is presently writing his mem- while the men carried “In Solidarity” signs. “In the short time that I’ve been with the passtime. His guest speaking engagements oirs. He and his late partner, Norman Carter, The NB ACSW, an agency that has served as ACSW, our chairperson has produced columns have included PFLAG, the Zonta Club and the were together 36 years and their October the independent voice for women since 1977, defending the need to have pride parades, de- Senior LGBT Group in Toronto. Gerard has 16, 2004 marriage is believed to be the first advocates for the women of NB and raises crying homophobic and hetero-sexist language, also been involved with other activists in Nova publicly-performed ceremony in Nova Scotia. awareness on their issues and concerns. The and has written about trans issues,” she said. Scotia and New Brunswick. They allowed TV cameras to be present so as Council hosts public educational events year- “Every time we have dealt with an issue relat- Amherst Mayor Rob Small also expressed to promote equal marriage. Gerard is known to round throughout the province, publishes a ing to the LGBT community, I’ve felt that the praise: “Gerard has not only strived to make Wayves readers as a regular columnist. Asked bi-annual statistical report on the status of NB ACSW has an admirable knowledge base to Amherst a better place to work, live and be how he would react to being inducted to the women, and maintains a toll-free line women work from and I never felt that their dealing proud of, he has worked tirelessly to ensure Order of Nova Scotia Gerard said it would be can call if they need to find out about services with the issues were tokenistic. The LGBT that Nova Scotia is recognized to be open and a further recognition of the queer community available to them. community has a strong ally in the NB ACSW.” welcoming to all.” of the province. “Being nominated is both Beth Lyons, NB ASCW’s event coordina- Veldhoven, the father of two sons and two humbling and exciting,” says Veldhoven. tor and researcher, said she is hoping that this

International Day Against Homophobia n Prince Edward Island, Abegweit Rainbow countysexualhealth.com . can only be purchased in advance at Planned national Day Against Homophobia. All are Collective, in partnership with PFLAG Frontrunners/walkers of Newfoundland Parenthood at 203 Merrymeeting Road, or at invited. This will mark the first time The City IPEI, AIDS PEI, and UPEI Rainbow Al- will host an informal run/walk, tentatively the Travel Bug in the Avalon Mall or 155 Water of Corner Brook as honoured this important liance are planning a showing of “Fish out scheduled for 6:00 p.m. on May 17, starting at Street, St. John’s. The location for the event has day and we believe the first time this action has of Water,” with a panel discussion after the the Quidi Vidi Boathouse. To confirm time and yet to be determined, so please contact execu- been taken in Western Newfoundland . viewing. At press time the details have not location e-mail [email protected]. tive director Costa Kasimos at (709) 579-1009 The Nova Scotia Rainbow Action Project all been worked out, so check ARC’s web- As in the past years, there will be a Rain- or toll-free at 1 (877) NO MYTHS (666-9847). will hold an IDAHT event in Halifax. Please site at www.arcofpei.com or e-mail info@ bow Peace March, organized by PFLAG and E-mail executivedirector@nlsexualhealthcen- visit the Halifax LGBT Events Board at gay. arcofpei.com for up-to-date information. AIDS Saint John. The march will begin at 5:45 tre.org or visit the website at www.nlsexual- hfxns.org/events for all the details. The Pictou County Centre for Sexual Health p.m. at the Fort La Tour site on Harbour Pas- healthcentre.org. and the Pictou County Women’s Centre will sage in Saint John, NB, and will make its way On 17th May hold an open house from 1:30 p.m. to 4:00 to Centenary-Queen Square United Church, at 11:30 Mayor Regular Columns p.m. on May 17 at 503 South Frederick Street in 215 Wentworth Street, for our annual Service Greeley of Cor- New Glasgow. There will be brochures, posters, of Prayer and Hope at 7:00 pm, followed by ner Brook and information and light refreshments available to refreshments. For more information, contact well as Christian Chef’s Corner 10 • Groups & Services 12 • I Am What I celebrate this day. The Pictou County Centre Mack MacKenzie or AIDS Saint John. Corbet, Founder Amherst 4 • Kibitz and Bitch 6 • Lesbian Soap Box Dia- for Sexual Health is also looking to form a Planned Parenthood (NL Sexual Health and Chairperson ries 4 • Last Word 14 Deadline for May issue: Friday, May 6 (first Friday of focus group with LGBTTQQI individuals in Centre)’s Annual International Day Against of Corner Brook every month!) [email protected] • On- the community to identify needs and supports, Homophobia breakfast, with guest speaker Pride Inc. will raise line: www.wayves.ca • Join us on Facebook: as well as a working group—please call Rayann T.A. Loeffler, will be held on May 17, beginning the Pride Flag at Wayves Magazine Rocks! • and Twitter: @ at (902) 695-3366 if interested. PCCSH has at 7:15 a.m. and will run through to 8:30 a.m. City Hall in rec- WayvesMagazine a Facebook page. Its website is www.pictou- Tickets are $17.00 each (cash or cheque) and ognition of Inter- 2 — May 2011 — Wayves Atlantic Canada News Safe Harbour MCC of the Youth Board. “I have always NACS Art for Life other marginalized populations in Parties kicked off in January and run had a good time being on the Youth northern Nova Scotia. monthly right up until July. Pride Closes its Doors Board. I defiantly think more people Auction For more information contact Week occurs in August and will in- On April 3, seventeen of the twenty- should join and provide their input to The Northern AIDS Connection NACS at (902) 895-0931, e-mail clude the flag raising event on August seven members, and fourteen friends make the Youth Project even better Society is pleased to present its tenth [email protected] or visit the website 17, Pride dance on August 20, and the of Safe Harbour met to discuss and than it already is!” Anyone interested annual Art for Life Auction. This spe- at www.northernaidsconnectionso- parade on the 21st. Other events will in joining or getting more informa- cial evening will be held on Monday, ciety.ca. be announced as Pride approaches. tion on the Youth Board can go to June 13 at the Best Western Glengarry If you would like to volunteer with the Youth Projects website at www. Hotel in Truro, NS. Viewing will be- River of Pride River of Pride, visit the website at youthproject.ns.ca. This is definitely gin at 6:00 p.m. and the auction will www.fiertemonctonpride.ca. an experience you don’t want to miss begin an hour later. Elects New Board out on. Local distinguished artists Rob River of Pride held its AGM at Halifax Pride Scott, Bruce McCabe, Rob Marshall, Triangles on March 30 and elected Michelle Brake, Janice Stewart and a new board for the 2011-12 Pride Public Meetings Dance In Amherst many others have all generously do- Cumberland Pride would like to an- season. The members remaining from Halifax Pride will hold public meet- nated works for the event. last year are Paul Leblanc (Chair/ ings leading up to Pride Week 2011, nounce a spring get-together dance… Tickets no dinner, just a night of dancing and President) and his brother, Greg Le- July 17 – 24. These meetings will be are $10.00, blanc (Secretary/Treasurer). Joining held at Youth Project, 2281 Bruns- decide the fate of the 20-year-old pool upstairs at the Warehouse on which in- Havelock St. in Amherst. the executive this year are Ed Old- wick Street, Halifax on Tuesday, May church . cludes the ford (Vice-Chair) and Roger Poirier 17 and Tuesday, June 21. Each meet- After two hours of often tearful On May 7, let’s shake off those p r i c e o f winter blues and get down! Pool (Second Vice-Chair), who served as ing will start at 6:30 p.m. question-and-answer, the members the paddle, President in 2009. Ben Theriault ac- We welcome all interested in voted 9 to 7 (with one abstention) to tables will be available. Admission is red ribbon, $10.00 in advance (you can reserve cepted the position of Volunteer Co- Halifax Pride to attend and stay in- continue operations despite an unten- snacks and ordinator. All three new committee formed as our Festival starts to take able financial position, no pastor, and them via e-mail at cumberlandpride@ a t i c k e t hotmail.com) and at the door. members for the new Pride season are shape. We also welcome questions no prospect of being able to hire one. for door previous members of River of Pride. or comments to our office phone at In a continuation of the AGM Visit Cumberland Pride online at prizes. All cumberland-pride.sytes.net. With Pride season well on its way, (902) 431-1194 or by email to chair@ two weeks later, the members decided proceeds go to NACS to assist with River of Pride is well into its gear- halifaxpride.com. to re-vote on the matter, and after a programming for youth, women and ing up-process. The annual Colour Cont’d next page brief discussion, voted 11-3 to dis- continue operations. The existing board agreed to oversee the transition of existing min- istries: Manna for Health, Christmas Dinner, and annual picnic, to vol- unteer groups formed from former members and friends of the church. Anyone interested in this should contact the church at 902-453-9249, [email protected] or via Wayves. Lesbian Sexual Assault Research I am a Ph.D candidate and member of the LGBTQ community from Nova Scotia studying at Laval Uni- versity in Quebec. I am researching sexual assault between women. It is my hope that this research will ulti- mately raise awareness about this im- portant and little-known issue while contributing to the development of prevention and response strategies. I will be interviewing participants in Nova Scotia, Quebec, Ontario and New York. To learn more about who can participate and what’s involved see the online call for participants at www.womensresearch.info. Click on “English” for the English version of the document. You can also contact me by email at [email protected] or by phone at (418) 952-9271. Just ask for KelleyAnne. Youth Project Youth Board The Youth Project is currently search- ing for members to be on our Youth Board, the Youth Board is made up of youth, 25 years of age and un- der, who use the Youth Project’s ser vices. The Youth Board has control over a budget for dances, parties, retreats and more and is open to any youth members who are interested. “The Youth Board is almost like being in a family,” says Aaron Stevens, co-chair Wayves ­— May 2011 — 3 Moncton Trans Camping Weekend By Josie Harding expression. A major factor that went bonfire and marshmallows for roast- The truth is we are in every corner Last year, with the help of some into the planning of this event is ing). Attendance is free, as well. Just of the world and have been so since friends in the local trans community, that it will take place in a private area find your way here and have a great the dawn of mankind in some form and the Moncton Transgendered Peer away from the public eye and on time. More details about the event will or another. web Support Group was formed to help privately-owned property—to ensure appear in the June issue of Wayves. This error proves to me that the pag- join the like minds and experiences our safety and allow our rich creativ- Once you have e-mailed your RSVP biggest problem with transgender e s of the trans brothers and sisters in ity to shine t o u s a t life here is the lack of education and a v a i l - our area. We extended this welcome in peace and I describe this coming out process be_tgmonc- information for society at large. If able on out to any and all transmen, trans- h a r m o n y as having your most embarrassing, ton@live. outing this condition to your spouse, t r a n s - women, androgynous, two-spirited, with nature. com, we will family, children, friends, neighbours g e n d e r - and gender-questioning people who A l s o f o r degrading and shameful moment ke e p yo u and a slew of medical professionals i s m , t h e could make it to the meeting hall. In our safety, of your entire life being played updated on weren’t enough, admitting this to readership of these re- doing so we have met people of all an RSVP e- the event as yourself is most often the hardest sources seem mainly confined ages from all over the province look- mail to our in slow motion on the 6 o’clock it approach- part. I describe this coming out proc- to the trans community itself or to ing for the much needed support they group email news for everyone to see es. Hope to ess as having your most embarrassing, those questioning or researching the craved. And today, I want to extend address is the only way to gain ad- see you there! degrading and shameful moment of issue. Why is this information only that hand even further. mittance. In doing it this way, it will A common misunderstanding I your entire life being played in slow being sought after once the problem Over the weekend of June 11 – allow us to prepare for the number hear all the time is that unless you motion on the 6 o’clock news for shows up? If majority finds the trans 12 the group will hold the inaugural of attendees in advance. live in large centers like Toronto you everyone to see. It’s truly debilitating spectrum so fearsome, why is there Moncton Transgendered Days of Since being transgendered is will probably never see a transperson. and exhaustive for new transpeople such a lack of proactive measures Celebration. We are looking for natural, so should we celebrate in a This statement, I assure you, could and the majority of the anguish stems to help everyone cope and deal with transpersons and allies from any- natural environment, with a forest not be farther from the truth, because directly from the lack of information transgenderism? After all, many of us where in Atlantic Canada and beyond campout event for those who choose as a small-town New Brunswick and education of those close to them. buy an umbrella before the rain starts. to join us in celebrating a weekend to stay overnight after the ceremonies transwoman, I can vouch that there In spite of the abundance of scien- Being prepared is part of our nature. that focuses specifically on gender on Saturday, June 11 (complete with are many others out here like me. tific and cultural texts, blogs, forums

News, Continued youth, ages 25 and under from July George House 8 – 11. Camp Seahorse: A camp for LG- Wayves Award BTQ* youth, ages 25 and under from Wayves exists to inform Atlantic Canadian lesbians, gay men, bisexuals George House Heritage Bed and August 19 – 22. Breakfast in Dildo, NL are long time Registration packages will be and transgender people of activities in their communities, to promote Wayves advertisers. Congratuations available May 1. Check out our web- those activities and to support their aims and objectives. to owners Dale and Todd on winning site for more information, at www. Wayves is an independent publication, published every month except the Gourmand International Award youthproject.ns.ca. Best First Cookbook Canada (Eng- February by a non-profit collective. Anyone who contributes to Wayves is lish) 2010! Check out Dan MacKay’s automatically considered to be a member of the collective and is welcome review of the book in our December to participate in all meetings and discussions. Wayves reserves the right 2010 issue at www.wayves.ca. Important to refuse material that might be reasonably considered heterosexism, writing and music workshops, team racism, sexism or an attack on individuals or communities. Opinions Youth Project building activities, scavenger hunts, WAYVES Dates! expressed in Wayves are not necessarily those of the editorial collective. campfires and maybe a few ghost The article submission deadlines are posted in the Important Wayves Dates Summer Camps stories. With the generous support of Issue Content Deadlines: section of this page. Articles should be a maximum of 1,000 words and Youth Project Summer Camps are the We’re Funny That Way Founda- Fridays: May 6, Jun 3, Jul 1: that is, a chance for LGBTQ* youth to get tion and First Baptist Church Halifax, the first Friday of each month (skipping may be edited for length. Submissions should be emailed in plain text to away for a few days in the summer. the Youth Project will host the fol- January.) You can send your news, ideas, the address below. Articles and letters may be published with pseudo- They’re aimed at creating the camp lowing summer camps: comments, criticisms, columns, cartoons nyms or anonymously, but Wayves must have contact information for experience in a safe, supportive and Camp Coyote: A camp for trans- and more to [email protected] the author. The copyright for all submissions remains the property of welcoming environment. Activities identified and gender-questioning the original author/creator. include canoeing, swimming, crafts, any time! Production Meetings Advertising: Jim Bain, Advertising Manager, email at [email protected] or (Halifax): Mondays: May 9, Jun 6, call 902-889-2229. Responsibility for errors in advertisements is limited Our Cover Jul 4: help decide what goes in the next to the value of the space. One of many beautiful and pow- issue, 7:30 PM, Blowers St Paper Chase, erful posters from Un sur Dix, Halifax. All welcome, every meeting. Circulation: use the email address below. Subscriptions, per year, are in the UMoncton anti-homophobia Magazine Layout (Halifax): Canadian dollars: $20 + 15% HST = $23 in Canada, $30 in the United project; story on Page 9. Cover May 15, Jun 12, Jul 10: help build the States, and $35 elsewhere. Send cheque or money order to the postal design by Cam MacLeod. paper – no special skills required, just address below. enthusiasm, and joining us even once, Wayves Wayves On Line! or for a few hours helps a LOT! 9:30 AM. P.O. Box 34090, Scotia Square Email us for location. Did you miss the last issue of Wayves? Or did your favourite distribution Halifax, Nova Scotia point run out of copies? Don’t fret! Now you can visit www.wayves. We're on the stands, in the mail, and B3J 3S1 ca, and download the current issue, and the archives too! We have lots online on the fourth Friday of every [email protected] of back issues on line too. If you’d like to be notified when the current month! www.wayves.ca issue is online- email us at [email protected]! Brought to You by // Where to Find Wayves

Anita Martinez Nathan Adams … and … Cam MacLeod Ralph Higgins Blowers Street Paper Want to tell your friends where to Atlantic Canada and around the Daniel MacKay Randall Perry Chase for meeting get their own copy of Wayves? Your country. If there are none handy first stop should be to www.wayves. to your home, write to submis- Jim Bain Will Murray space ca; you can download the current [email protected] and tell us Kim Fowlow Your Name Here! issue, a back issue, and also get the where we should be! complete list of our distributors in 4 — May 2011 — Wayves I Am What I Amherst Conference, Pride & France By Gerard Veldhoven dispersed so that greater understand- action in our respective communi- Some details are being ironed out What better way to celebrate spring ing may develop. This workshop, Col- ties. Many thanks and appreciation and will be included on their website, than to see the beginning of buds laborative Strategies in Community to Hugo Dann and the Nova Scotia cumberland-pride.sytes.net, or e-mail appearing on the trees and the green Development, was without question Rainbow Action Project for hosting the group at cumberlandpride@ grass springing from the earth. Ah, the most informative and decidedly this all-encompassing workshop. Fa- hotmail.com if only the world of our LGBT com- emotional event I have ever attended. cilitators Dr. Jeannie Cockell and Ross France recently became the elev- munity was able to do likewise, but The exchange of ideas and per- MacDonald were well informed and enth country to change marriage laws instead we march on to a different sonal stories told were without kept us from going into all sorts of to include same-sex couples. How drummer and continue our fights in question imprinted on the minds of directions, as time was of the essence. great to see such inroads in more a society that needs reminding over those in attendance. The informa- Plans for Pride Week are well nations, as time goes by. Now, if the ted by those that call themselves and over again that equal treatment is tion I gathered I presented to the under way here in Amherst and United States would finally get on our neighbours, the US is far behind but a dream. I attended a conference Cumberland Pride Society and boldly Cumberland County. The week of board. However, such is the societal Canada in equal rights. in Halifax recently where many of put out a challenge to members to act July 3 – 10 will see many flock to difference between our two countries. Well, my queer friends keeping us gathered and discussed ideas and on the many ideas I brought along. this part of the province to assist in Even with our daily queer bashings checking the pages of Wayves as shared stories that need to be told and Hopefully, many of us will go into celebrating queer events of all sorts. and all the other atrocities commit- more information comes your way. Lesbian Soap Box Diaries L’s Vagina Monologue: Bringing Sexy Back… already been medicated. They say Recently, my vagina suffered yet who sleep exclusively with women,” I Safely doctors and nurses make the worst another blow. I was reading up on read on. Both my vagina and I were “Oh yeah, I’m good, too,” she patients (or maybe its patience), and the latest news on line, you know, cocky in our arrogance, assuming it replied meekly, swallowing hard. By L. Connors “So…” I reply, “should I booked us When I woke up, my vagina was pis- they would be correct. I am thankful creeping on Facebook. Many of my was it was young hetero teens, or, that I was un- FB friends maybe the longstanding target of gay doctors appointments or just inquire sed off. My uterus was not the first about grave plots?” organ I had removed, but it will be able to form It’s no secret that I’m a selfish a r e a d vo - men, since it was one that had posted full sentences cates (politi- it. But my vagina, my lover (who I had “Both,” she says. “You know just the last if I can help it. Abdominal in case any one of the less than six surgery is painful, but when they between the lover. I’ve never felt the need cal, queer or read the article out loud to) and I were m o r p h i n e otherwise) all shocked to find out we were not as women we have each slept with had remove your uterus, they also take to protect anyone else’s ego by sex with more than her generous your cervix. This requires hacking and the pain. and I usually safe as we thought we were. Anyone, In my mind keep myself regardless of sexual orientation, who allotment.” up your vagina and stitching it back pretending to have an orgasm. It was one of those “aha” mo- together. As you may know, the sex I read this abreast by has had more than six sexual partners woman the riot act, yelling, “Of following their posted links. I came that they have had oral sex with, is at ments. It reminded me of when Lea organ contains an extreme amount Thompson first read about AIDS in of nerve endings. These sensory course they gave me drugs in recov- across an article titled, “Oral sex now an eightfold increased risk for oral ery, you moron. Cleary, I need more. main cause of oral cancer: Who faces cancers. My lover and I, both also the 1988 film, “Casual Sex.” Here I bits, in my opinion, are intended for am with a grown-up, educated and pleasure only. Unfortunately, they are I don’t care who you have to call, biggest risk?” Naturally my news-sav- smokers, sat in stunned silence. I just get me more drugs!” Instead, it vy mind was intrigued. As my vagina broke the silence with a barely audi- stimulated by pain with every bit as Cont’d next page much earnest as orgasm. I was com- came out more like, “Drugs, MORE smirked, “I only have sex with women ble, “So I’m good, you?” pletely unaware of the hip bone to drugs.” hip bone incision; instead my every My vagina’s usual mantra was waking thought was literally, “Oh original coined by Alice in “The L my GOD my fucking cunt HURTS Word.” In the long-anticipated scene SO BAD!” (I was later told I sobbed where she and Dana finally give into this to whoever was in the room their feelings for each other while whenever I was roused by the slight- stuffing wedding gift bags for Dana’s est sound, including my good friend impending wedding. “Fingers, more and her 5-year old-daughter, and my fingers,” she utters in her usual quirky 80-something-year-old roommate way. And voila! Just like that Alice and her loving husband. What else verbalized my vagina’s mantra. It’s would you expect from a pseudo sex no secret that I’m a selfish lover. I’ve columnist?) never felt the need to protect anyone The call bell was my lifeline. It was else’s ego by pretending to have an the first thing I reached for when I orgasm. I’m more of a “hello, glad was capable of conscious thought. you had a good time, but, um, I’m not Approximately a decade later, a nurse done over here” kind of girl. After all, appeared to inform me that I had I’ve always said one orgasm is merely foreplay.

From Citadel Hill to Sable Island…I’m here to help. Leonard Preyra MLA, Halifax Citadel-Sable Island “I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ”. Mohandas Gandhi Community Office 989 Young Avenue Tel: 444.3238 [email protected], www.preyra.ca Wayves ­— May 2011 — 5 The Evolution of an Academic Community By Matthew Campbell First, an e-mail was sent to an un- About eight people were in attend- Breton University with the opening and beyond. However, with all that In 1994, Cape Breton University known person expressing an interest ance. All were male. Few talked about of the Sexual Diversity Center (SDC). has changed there is still much to (then known as the University College in knowing more about the society. issues that were important to the The Center is largely staffed by vol- do in our community. Partners who of Cape Breton) had little in terms The only response requested more community and none would consider unteers with a coordinator who com- share a gender can get married, but of resources for LGBTQI* students. information. Why are you interested taking any actions that might result in pletes workshop training and helps they must survive public school to Of course, there was the Max Bell in the society? Do you know anyone being “outed.” It was simply a shared to provide sexual health information do so. Anti-homophobia posters are Health Clinic with information on who is in the society? The second space with like-minded people. Folks and services to all CBU students. nice efforts, but actions speak louder sexual health as well as a public health email provided those re- Volunteers have visited local than words. Don’t let anyone get nurse. There were free condoms and sponses and garnered a new Folks chatted about pop culture, schools to conduct anti- away with homophobia, biphobia, lubricant for those willing to request slew of questions. How do homophobia educational or transphobia. Even within the them. Jean Chrétien was the prime you self-identify? Are you in about secret crushes, about our hopes workshops and take part in LGBTQI* community there contin- minister of Canada. Equal marriage a relationship? Do you have speaking engagements. The ues to be much to learn. Don’t allow rights were over a decade away. Cape other supports in the com- and dreams, and about others we Center also houses a Safe heterosexism to persist in our society. Breton was one enormous, Celtic munity? Another response, Space room in which trou- Support your community. Help to closet tastefully decorated in a rain- another interrogation. Can thought might share our inclinations. bled students can escape build an inclusive society by insisting bow tartan that no one wanted to see. you meet outside of regular heterosexism or abusive upon equality. Asking for acceptance Campus life passed by the LG- class hours? Do you have transporta- chatted about pop culture, about language and behaviour while seek- assumes someone else’s approval is BTQI* community and little changed tion to and from the campus? Yes and secret crushes, about our hopes and ing comfort from friends and allies. required for one’s existence. Asking in that regard. Queer students spent yes. Finally, a meeting was arranged. dreams, and about others we thought Though the society continues to exist for tolerance assumes there is some- time with friends outside the Stu- This meeting was with a person might share our inclinations. as a forum for political discussion and thing potentially intolerable about the dents’ Union offices at ‘Chievers, whose first name was finally shared In the twelve years that have community change, the SDC takes life you need. Demand to be treated but there was always an underlying after several exchanged emails. The passed since that first year, the Sexual the lead in CBU’s annual Pride Week as human beings. It is an indifference longing. Most had yet to experience school was barely populated at 2:30 Diversity Society at Cape Breton Uni- and contributes semi-regularly to the that everyone else takes for granted. anything gay in their lives. Those who p.m. on a Friday afternoon. We met versity has continued to grow and campus newspaper The Caper Times I would rather you ignore me alto- did have a part in a LGBTQI* life did in a secluded area behind the campus evolve. The society became more to keep folks up to date on activities gether than acknowledge me solely so quietly behind closed doors. store—which is now the box office public as younger and newer students and important sexual health news. as a sexual being or gender identity. I remember learning that there of the Boardmore Theatre. He was began to proudly use their voice. In Much has changed in the lives of It is the least interesting thing about was a new society at UCCB called the nervous. Tentative. And he only of- 2001, the Sexual Diversity Society the Cape Breton LGBTQI* com- me. How about you? Sexual Diversity Society. It was be- fered the time and place to meet with initiated a greater presence at Cape munity in years leading up to 1994 ing kept quiet, but this secret society the rest of the society. spoke to the state of Cape Breton’s The meeting space changed each gay community in the 90s. It was the week to ensure no one would be able process of joining the society that was to harass members should the society most telling… become known around the campus.

Diaries Cont’d from prev. page mutilated vagina. It has been more care of and look out for each other. than six months since my hysterec- I now buy dental dams wholesale, I tomy. The surgeon had sworn he had only have sex with the less than six left both of my ovaries, but I had women that I have previously slept begun to suspect that he was in fact with, and, my “see you next Tuesday” a chauvinist liar, hell-bent on level- is always ready and willing to come ling the playing field on the whole whenever I need her to. multiple orgasms issue. My vagina was still protesting and fingers more fingers had turned into more of an act of mutually-assisted masturba- tion. I pretended not to notice or Books and be concerned. Then one day, while slightly intoxicated, my insatiable sexual appetite returned. I lost count sex toys of fingers and orgasms. Then, at 2:00 a.m., I proceeded to call all of my nearest and dearest friends to an- nounce, “My vagina is back!” Believe 179-7001 Wayves 1_6_K 2/9/07 12:15 PM Page 3 me… I never joke about such things! My vagina and I have made up. We yone! are best friends again. We now take for ever Wayves Ad April-08-11Some 10:55:36 PM things should be as easy as pie.

Looking to sell or buy a home in Halifax? Afraid it will be a long and complicated process? With over 20 years of sales in Metro 1598 Barrington St, Halifax. 902-422-0004 Halifax, you can trust I have the experience to to order: 1.877.370.9288 or make your real estate decision a simple one. www.venusenvy.ca Contact me today. Cell 902.456.9988 Email [email protected] www.edithhancock.ca

Professional Realty 6 — May 2011 — Wayves NSRAP Report Our Next Government by Kevin Kindred part of how we form community, NSRAP doesn’t tell you who to vote and influence the other Canadian Hi Tom for. Our Board Members come from communities we belong to. Attacks How are things on the Prairies? Spring is in full Good advice I thought. Hey, I wonder if they have all political stripes, and I don’t think on the CBC, reduced funds for arts strength here on the east coast—lots of green, a Facebook page? we could agree to endorse a candidate and publishing, and creeping censor- warmth in the air, flowers. All of us glad to finally I did use some social media to let people know even if it were in our mandate! But ship of films should concern us—as pack away parkas and snow boots. I enjoy watching about the concert that the university chorus gave a we do try to have our finger on the should the divisive nature of the the flocks of university students gadding about in while ago. There was a good attendance and several pulse of the political issues that the government’s attitude that “ordinary skimpy tee shirts and shorts. Some people are avid friends had come to hear us and it was very satisfying Rainbow community cares about. people” don’t care about the arts. bird watchers, I prefer people watching, especially to sing to such smiling faces. Because we tenors are With that in mind, and with an Luckily, we queers have always been when I can turn my gaze on nubile young men. comparatively few in number, I always feel that we election on the horizon, here are extraordinary people. Just a variation on observing woodpeckers and are engaged in a kind of struggle not to be swept some things I think we should be An end to evangelical nut hatches and sap suckers really, Tom. Everyone away by the sea of sopranos or the ground swell of demanding of Canada’s next govern- influence ment—whoever it may be. needs a hobby. altos—lovely voices all, but rather overwhelming by In the last few years we’ve learned a Speaking of students I saw this fantastic video on their sheer numbers. All in all though, it was a great Furtherance of equality lot about how the religious right has YouTube created by a group in Ireland. It’s an anti- success with sustained applause from the audience rights organized into a political force in homophobia/bullying piece that is really powerful at the end and a pleased grin on our director’s face, The most obvious and pressing pri- Canada. And we’ve seen the effects— and hopeful. A lovely thing that shows some high so it felt like the hard work was worth it. ority here is the addition of “gender mainly quiet and behind-the-scenes. school age kids who witness acts of homophobia We used to have rehearsal on Monday evenings identity” and “gender expression” to Edits to the guide for immigrants, de- and how they respond to it. A friend of mine who so now I have extra time when I can kick back and the Canadian Human Rights Act—a cisions about Pride funding, changes grew up in Ireland said that if the country had been relax and veg out in front of the boob tube. Among measure approved by the House of to the age of consent for sexual activ- Commons, but which died in the ity—these have the fingerprints of like that when he was a lad he might have stayed some newly discovered fun things is a show called Senate with the election call. But the religious right all over them. We there. You can check it out on Facebook where Lost Girl. Have you seen it? It is full of magical, there are other important issues, like need a government that is transparent I’ve posted it. weird creatures like banshees and succubae and, in the too-long-neglected discrimina- about who’s pulling the strings, and Oh wait, I forgot, you don’t believe in social particular, one very hunky shape shifter. He is my tion in setting the age of consent that is dedicated to a real separation media. I don’t Twitter or tweet or whatever they main reason for watching, Tom, as I’m sure you’ve for sexual activity (16 for straights, of church and state. That isn’t to say call it but I do use Facebook in a very limited way. surmised. I’ve developed quite a fondness for shape 18 for gay men) and, more generally, that religious people should have Hey, did you read where Facebook cofounder, Chris shifters of late. I know everyone thinks vampires the promotion of equality through no influence—but policy should be Hughes, is going to marry his longtime boyfriend? are sexy and erotic but there is something appealing the Court Challenges Program, Status guided by what’s good for the coun- Will their wedding photos get posted on the site, do about people who literally let their animal nature of Women, and other organizations try, not the conservative social views you think? I’ve noticed that all kinds of products take over. Another series, True Blood, has a whole who’ve seen ideologically-driven of a small but vocal religious minority. now have their own Facebook pages including some family of shape shifters. My fantasy mind reels at funding cuts in recent years. A real strategy on HIV/AIDS surprising ones. I mean, I’m all in favour of pages the possibilities. Maybe it is just watching them rip A check on police powers The Rainbow community, like no for fundraising for cancer research or encouraging off their shirts and get down on all fours that titil- The work of Gary Kinsman, who other, knows how important it is to people to vote or other sort of social justice kinds lates my sexual senses. I’m not exactly sure what the recently spoke in Halifax, demon- fight the spread of HIV/AIDS, in of things, but toilet paper? I’m serious. It’s a bit attraction is—besides the fact that all the characters strates that unchecked police pow- Canada and in the world. In recent disconcerting to view a TV ad for arse wipe inviting are handsome and buff and naked a lot. Sort of ers are always used to target sexual years, the federal government has me to visit their Facebook page. Why would I want like porn minus the erections and with a real story deviants, queers, and other outsiders. fought to shut down successful harm- to visit the toilet paper page? Will there be hordes of line, bizarre as the stories sometimes are. Perhaps We should be very concerned about reduction mechanisms that can use- people who want to “like” the product, maybe even it’s because we have to look beyond their outward recent proposals to make online fully curb the spread of disease. The add it to their “friends” list? How pathetic would it appearance to discover who they are as people. Or surveillance easier, and to make infor- government’s obsession with prisons look if my profile showed that now Crawford Hastie maybe it’s something as simple as discovering that mation available to police without a and criminals prevents it from seeing “likes” a certain toilet paper brand? There are certain in a world of good and evil brimming with magic, warrant. And we should be demand- that a rational policy on drugs can things that should remain secret. I was watching an with humans and other creatures battling for souls ing transparency in the way the police slow the HIV/AIDS epidemic. And interview the other day with Justin and Ryan—you and blood and power, being queer is not even an conduct themselves—the secrecy and a Bill designed to make generic anti- know the Scottish pair who host their own decorat- issue. In these fantasy realms, no one is “normal” scandals around the G20/G8 protests HIV drugs more affordable in the ing show? Both of them are good-looking and gayer and I find that very comforting. are just the latest in a string of stories developing world, which passed in than a pink sporran; I find them delightful. Anyway, Talk to you soon. Love ya! about police corruption and abuse the House, was killed in the Senate by Colin was saying that one of the secrets he’s learned of power. partisan tricks. Thirty years into the about keeping a relationship going is to keep an air Support for arts and culture crisis, we should be demanding that Canada be an international leader, of mystery and romance. Which means, he said, in We all know the story of cutting funding for Toronto Pride—despite not an international embarrassment. that Scottish accent which tickles my fancy, “Your Those are the issues I’ll be asking partner should never see you on or near the toilet.” abundant evidence that investing in Pride events is good for our cities my candidates about in the election, and our economy. But this story is and raising with my MP in the new bigger. The Rainbow community’s Parliament. I hope you do the same. ties to the arts run deep—it’s a big N Desig NN Fly N

Visit our lighting showroom 2698 Agricola Street, Halifax, NS Norma 902.420.0736 | normanflynn.com | lighting + design services Wayves ­— May 2011 — 7 Cape Breton Takes a Stand Against Homophobia By Peter Steele phoning Steve Murphy at CTV News remark or attack has been directed to stand up and speak out against This year is the twentieth anniversary Atlantic after a news report, thanking towards someone else. homophobia. since the World Health Organization him for his use of “same-gender” In March, 2009, Egale Canada In February of last year, Cape removed homosexuality from its list relationships. He was the only other conducted a study involving 1,700 Breton was rocked when a member of mental illnesses. Some may say person I heard phrasing it the way Canadian school students, polled by of our gay community was attacked this was a major turning point in our I always had. He got it, and we all way of an online survey, or through while accompanying his partner from struggle to gain our basic human need to get it! The simplest of terms in-school sessions held in four school a gay community dance. Eventually, rights, and we’ve indeed made much can and does diminish who we are boards. The results are startling. due to the testimony of two coura- headway and celebrated many suc- as human beings. It contributes to Three-quarters of LGBTQ students geous women who witnessed the cesses; yet despite it all, homophobia the abuse we continue to endure and felt unsafe in at least one place at assault, a seventeen year old was ar- still exists, and people continue to carry with us throughout our lives. school. Transgender students were rested. His case was sent to Youth Re- suffer the devastating repercussions I had the honour and pleasure of especially likely to see these places as storative Justice, where I represented of slander and physical attacks. In attending a Halifax conference April unsafe (87%). Six out of ten LGBTQ the victim at a session meant to assign what we consider a modern world, 18 and 19, hosted by Hugo Dann students reported being verbally har- measures for the assailant to make 77 countries continue to criminalize of the Nova Scotia Rainbow Action assed about their sexual orientation. amends and repay the victim for a homophobia, before participants homosexuality, with five prescribing Project, facilitated by Ross MacDon- Nine out of ten transgender students, portion of his huge medical expenses. set out on a march throughout the the death penalty. Sadly enough, our ald and Jeannie Cockell with the Nova six out of ten LGB students, and To date, the accused did not fulfill his Sydney’s downtown core. Participants fight is far from over, and we continue Scotia Department of Economic and three out of ten straight students obligations to the court, and he’s been will return to the band shell where to take a stand against homophobia Rural Development, and attended were verbally harassed because of referred back to the court system. they’ll enjoy barbecued hotdogs and and transphobia. by leaders from organized The accused has retained a hamburgers, compliments of M&M As we prepare to recognize Inter- LGBTQ communities from lawyer, and in an up-coming Meat Shops. Refreshments and cake national Day Against Homophobia across this great province. In February of last year, Cape court date will enter a plea or will also be served. Everyone is wel- (IDAH), consider this year’s theme, On the second day, while Breton was rocked when a member guilty or not guilty. Bottom come, and we invite you to come out “Same-Sex Couple: A Story of Love.” gathered in a circle, we all line, the accused does not and take a stand against homophobia! In so many ways this is such an im- spoke of our impressions of our gay community was attacked take his actions seriously, I would like to leave you with portant point we need to promote. of the prior day’s activities. and has illustrated ill regard an introduction to Dave Pallone, a Our relationships of love are very The testimonies given were while accompanying his partner for the victim and the justice retired professional umpire with an much the same and as important as all very personal stories of from a gay community dance. system itself. I will be sure 18-year career; ten of those years those of heterosexual couples, and how we’ve all been victims to keep members of our with the National Baseball League. many in the straight community need of homophobic abuse on some level. their expression of gender. provincial gay community informed As the third youngest umpire in to understand that. Our relationships The tragic matter of those stories One in four LGB students had of the results. baseball history, he demonstrated are loving relationships, and many are however, was that each one of them been physically harassed about their International Day Against Homo- courage, professionalism and the lifetime partnerships. I do however, revealed the painful bruises that still sexual orientation. Almost two in phobia is May 17, however in Sydney ability to withstand adversity through have a personal belief that accept- remain deep inside of us all. Years five transgender students and one in we will be marking the occasion on many of baseball’s high profile and ing and using the term “same-sex” later, regardless of the struggles five LGB reported being physically Sunday, May 15. Pride Cape Breton, controversial events. He is the author comes with derogatory implications we’ve endured and legal gains we’ve harassed due to their expression of together with the local chapter of of the 1990 New York Time’s best- and perpetuates a vulgar view of our accomplished, the abuse thrown at gender. Three-quarters of LGBTQ PFLAG, the Cape Breton Health selling autobiography, “Behind the loving relationships in the eyes of our us in our early years have left us with students and 95% of transgender stu- Authority Addiction Services, the Mask: My Double Life in Baseball.” opponents. Never are heterosexual unhealed wounds. We cannot let dents felt unsafe at school, compared AIDS Coalition of Cape Breton On his website (www.davepallone. couples referred to as opposite-sex this continue! We cannot allow our to one-fifth of straight students. and local Gay Straight Alliances will com) you’ve find a clip of one of his couples, yet the general public labels younger brothers and sisters live a Over half of LGBTQ students hold a rally at Sydney’s Wentworth incredible inspirational workshops our loving unions as something lifetime of deep, unhealed wounds. did not feel accepted at school, and Park Band Shell at 12 noon. Guest where he speaks so openly and hon- strictly sexual. If that’s not blatant When we don’t speak out against almost half felt they could not be speakers will speak on the subject of estly about homophobia. homophobia, I’m not sure then homophobia, we accept the abuse as themselves, compared to one-fifth what is. our own; we let it happen to us per- of straight students. Transgender Throughout the debates that lead sonally, and we make it acceptable. It students (over a third) were twice as to our eventual passage to marriage has to stop; we can no longer remain likely as LGB students to strongly freedoms and rights, I found myself silent, even though a homophobic agree that they sometimes feel very depressed about their school, and they did not belong there; four times as likely as straight students. Tom Uses Wayves Review These numbers are staggering, and Jules Chamberlain only prove things haven’t changed, REALTOR® and when we consider how the in- 902 817 6007 c ternet has changed typical trends of 902 477 3333 f social networking, it’s probably safe [email protected] to say things have gotten worse. It canoerealty.ca has never been so important for us

I was surprised to see a quote from my review of the gorgeous tome “Tom of Finland: XXL” (August, 2009) on the jacket ribbon of this new edition of “Tom of Finland: The Comics Volume 1.” The publisher got the country wrong... but it’s gratifying to see Wayves quoted on the cover. (Come to think of it, I wouldn’t mind being in Australia, if only to escape the still-chilly wind!) – Randall Perry 8 — May 2011 — Wayves Big Plans for Moncton Pride Party Alex Roberts and partner Mario, put on before? A: No, the event is open to anyone “upgraded” fee. by the host between sets, and during both Monctonians, are planning the A: None! We created the company who is open-minded, and we don’t Q: And with River of Pride? DJ setup times. biggest Pride party ever in Atlantic “Modern Vision Events Limited” want anyone there who is going to A: We’re working with the River Q: What geographic areas will you Canada, coinciding with the River just for this event. We’ve personally cause problems. There’ll be the prop- of Pride organizers. We have ten draw on for an audience? of Pride festival in August. Alex is a invested $60,000 to start up, which er security; we’ll work with the RCMP. floats to add to the Pride Parade plus A: We’ll have posters up in the is beginning to be supple- There will be extended security on several sponsors who will be adding Maritimes, Montreal, Toronto, Van- mented by sponsors. Main Street to the parade. couver, Winnipeg, Edmonton, Ban- Q: Where did you get the and in the On a trip to Montreal Our goal is to gor, New York, Miami, Las Vegas idea for a circuit party for other venues. bring eight to and more—the entertainers we’re Atlantic Canada? There will be we went to Unity, Sky, ten thousand working with will put posters will A: Actually, we’ve never an inexpen- people to the be up in these cities for us and will been to a circuit party like sive shuttle Parking and Le Stud, parade this be promoting the event during their Black and Blue, Cherry or between the and when we came back year. performances in other cities. Toronto the White Party. On a trip to venues so The event Pride will be promoting the event via Montreal we went to Unity, that people we decided were bringing has several radio shows. Sky, Parking and Le Stud, don’t drink philanthrop- Q: Are you looking past this year? and when we came back and drive. Montreal to Moncton. ic purposes: A: Yes! We’re trying to work with we decided were bringing People can first, raising the Pride Committees all over Atlan- Montreal to Moncton. Also, leave their cars at home, or leave money for the CARA Help Line, for tic Canada—next year it might be in many of our friends wanted them in the hotel or Casino parking River of Pride and for sponsoring Moncton, or, it might be in Halifax to to do more than the River lots. Ten Moncton hotels will have anti-bullying campaigns. coincide with the Pride there. of Pride celebrations. blocks of rooms with special rates. “Discrimination and bullying in Tickets for the weekend go on sale Q: How are things going Q: Why are there events at several this day and age should not be hap- on May 2, from Casino New Bruns- so far? venues simultaneously? pening; the discrimination action in wick (www.casinonb.ca). There will A: People are pumped up A: For a couple of reasons: first Riverview last month shouldn’t have be three levels of “bracelet” weekend for this. They’re saying that of all, no one venue can hold all the happened. It’s not 1990, it’s 2011, and passes plus a couple of events for there’s nothing like this in people who will be here for this, and it has to stop, and that’s our mission,” which tickets can be bought sepa- Sponsorship levels range from Friend of the Festival Atlantic Canada. There are second, people will want a diversity of said Alex. “If you start by teaching rately. Bracelet holders can be regis- for $2,500, to Title Sponsor at $40,000. some people who are scared entertainment and cover fees. it to adults, it’ll spread to the kids.” tered in a draw for a total of $10,000 to see how this is going to Q: What is your relationship with To get the message across during worth of prizes to be given away to landscaper who has his own company. turn out, but lots of people want to Triangles? the events, Alex and Mario have hired bracelet holders. On April 14, Dan MacKay met up buy tickets ahead of time. We have A: Stella and Evie are 100% be- a motivational speaker, and are work- The Facebook group, “City Pride with them. two hundred ticket reserved already! hind us. Several of the events will ing with a movie producer to make Celebration 2011,” has been created Q: This is quite an ambitious Q: Is the event open just to the be held there… for example, the three short videos on bullying. The so that people can get more informa- project. What large events have you LGBT crowd? Friday evening event will have an movies and messages will be delivered tion and event updates.

The Candy Show, Season Two By Ramona Westgate You enter the fog-filled room through a place in the audience to fit them but quickly becomes contagious as doing what she loves most. She never Candy Palmater has been dreaming about a black curtain. Goodbye Charlotte’s in. Promptly at 7:00 p.m., the tap- you can’t help but laugh at the silliness missed an opportunity to engage the bringing her comedy to the small screen for “I Want Candy” is playing in back- ing begins. Sort of. If you have ever you feel at laughing at nothing at all. It audience or to show her appreciation years, and her dream has finally come true. ground. There is a high-energy buzz been to a taping, you know that the reminds you of a time in your child- for our patience, or, even to thank The second season of “The Candy Show” of anticipation that assures you that audience is put to work. The taping hood, when you started laughing for her crew, which is remarkable, con- taped in Halifax in March in front of a everyone is looking forward to just begins with rounds of the audience no reason and could not stop. sidering I would later learn that she live audience. Ramona Westgate was there. that. The doors open at 6:00 p.m., pretending to laugh, clap and cheer. Two shows were taped that had been on set since 11:00 a.m. She and by 6:45 the crew is not only on The cheering was natural and genu- evening in a little over four hours. frequently added tidbits just for the the hunt for more chairs, but also ine. The laughter starts out awkward, It was a long night. There were a lot audience, saying, “I’ll have to retake of stops, starts, retakes, and down this intro, but I want to share this time. The eclectic lineup included, a story with you guys.” I left feeling as fire eater, a rock and roll band, tattoo though those of you who only get Anita’s Photo artist Amber Thorpe (who finished to see the show on air were actually a tat for Candy during the taping), missing out. Don Ross (the best guitar player I Season two will air on the APTN have ever heard perform live), and a in the fall. In the meantime you can powerful and moving dedication that watch episodes from season one I have no doubt all audience members online at www.thecandyshow.com. were honoured to be a part of. As well, keep an eye out this fall for And then there was Candy. Not our Wayves feature article including Candice, but Candy herself. I have a one-on-one interview with Candy. seen Candy perform before, and been But most importantly, keep your ears captivated, but this was beyond my to the ground for the taping of sea- expectations. There is obvious pride son three. Trust me: you won’t want and joy in fulfilling her dream and to miss it.

Once again, we have a happy accident. It was a cool early summer day and I had my camera in my hand walking up the steps at Lawrencetown beach. At the top of the stairs I looked up to see that the sky was perfect, the beach and water glorious looking, but straight ahead was the most magnificent view of these two men just standing, calmly taking it all in. There was my picture! Wayves ­— May 2011 — 9 OUTeast Launches One Year Countdown

Ian Mullan channels the Naked Civil Servant himself, the great Quentin Crisp A n d Stewart Legere: the revelers were angelic wings and voice to see, and what we had introduction over the course of a been able to see in Halifax,” year. Instead of launching the film captured in the photobooth, to be forever said An-dria of the initial impetus festival right off the bat and expect- backed up on Facebook. By Randall Perry to create OUTeast. “We concluded ing to have an audience, we want to showcase both the local queer work On Friday, April 8, Halifax’s Com- that we wanted to bring more, to see cultivate and build that audience,” on bags of pink popcorn, enjoying that’s being done and also the best in pany House played host to film fans more. Through the ‘That’s So Gay’ explained Andria. the entertainment on stage and on international cinema.” and pink popcorn party people at the series at AFF we see what the crowds Added Jenna, “When you really screen (two short films made their With a successful launch party in One Year Countdown party to launch are like and what the desire is like to want to do something, you just have premiere at the event) and stopping the can, the OUTeast story is just the OUTeast Film Festival. see more content. So we thought, why to go out and make it happen your- by the photo booth for a fun snap beginning. A year may seem like a The festival is the brainchild of not give it a go?” self. I’ve been interested in program- session with local photographer Jess long time, but like being swept away Andria Wilson, Krista Davis and The launch party, hosted by co- ming for a long time… I started doing Tasker. The OUTeast organizers by a compelling film, you won’t notice Jenna Dufton. All three are contract median Megan McDowell and joined it a little bit with AFF and I thought, (and their sponsors and volunteers) the time fly by. staff with the Atlantic Film Festival. by local musical and acting luminaries well, if I want to do more of this, need not worry about their audience, OUTeast can be found on Face- “When we were wrapping up last Stewart Legere, Ian Mullan, Margot then maybe we should just go ahead if the numbers at the launch were book at www.facebook.com/OUT- year’s festival we were all out together Durling, Ryan MacGrath and more, is and do it. Now we are.” any indication. “It’s an exciting, vital eastFilmFestival and can be followed with Lia Rinaldo (AFF director) and just the first event in what promises to Throughout the evening the time,” said Andria. “There are lots on Twitter at @outeastfilmfest. Its we got to talking about queer film. be an interesting year-long endeavour. enthusiastic crowd milled about, of artists here and a lot of creative e-mail address is outeastfilmfestival@ What we had seen, what we wanted “Basically, we want to roll out our enjoying their drinks, munching work going on, and we’re happy to gmail.com.

Un sur Dix: Sexual Diversity Awareness Week

by Chantal Thanh Laplante their daughter. This activity attracted The week of March 21 – 25 was the a few dozen students and community Un sur Dix Association’s Sexual Di- members and was much appreciated versity Awareness Week. This annual since gay parenting isn’t something event was created last year on the we often talk about or see. campus of Université de Moncton. Our final event was a Jam night We had many daily activities, such at the Café Osmose, where many as three awareness booths, where talented singers and musicians played we delivered homophobia awareness a few songs each to entertain the t-shirts, ribbons and bracelets and crowd. This cozy and intimate event talked about our association and the exceeded our expectations with a high challenges our members face. participation rate. During these two We organized a Sexual Diversity last events, we also officially launched March on Tuesday, March 22, to cel- our awareness posters. ebrate diversity and to encourage an Our Sexual Diversity Awareness accepting and respecting university Week was a success and the execu- environment. Approximately 50 smil- tive committee is satisfied with the ing students, teachers and members results and the participation of the of the community participated in this community. We would like to send march, waving pride flags, awareness special thanks to U de M’s Social signs and posters. Work Student Council and the Social On Wednesday we organized the Justice Project for collaborating with viewing of the documentary, “Mes us and to Moncton’s River of Pride deux Mamans” (My Two Moms), for providing us with awareness which follows five lesbian couples— items. We would also like to thank three from Quebec and two from photographer Jimmy Robichaud for New Brunswick—who have children. all his time and effort in the mak- After the movie, a special guest was ing of our awareness posters and invited to do a presentation on her to James Fogarty for designing our and her partner’s process to conceive new logos. Chantal Laplante, president of Un Sur Dix, leads about 30 people at the Diversity march in Moncton on Tuesday, March 22. 10 — May 2011 — Wayves

Chef’s Corner Indian Point Mussels “Normandy” Serves 4 This is a traditional French recipe from le Pays d’Auge in Ingredients Normandy, France. Like our Annapolis Valley region of 4 lbs cultivated Indian Point Nova 2 Shallot, minced 1/2 cup heavy cream 35% Nova Scotia, Auge is also know for its wonderful apple Scotia mussels 3 garlic clove minced 1 large Honey Crisp apple or other orchards and cider. These two ingredients inspired us 1/4 cup butter 2 tbsp chopped fresh rosemary (cut in batonnettes) to serve this dish at Chives. This recipe is made with 1 cup Tide View hard apple cider 1 tsp fresh cracked black pepper rosemary, but it is also exceptional with fresh summer savory. Method 1. On medium heat, in a stockpot, gently cook shallots and rosemary in butter until translucent. 2. Turn heat to high and add the cleaned mussels. Stir the mussels around to coat in shallots and butter, add the cider and cream then cover and steam until the mussels open (approx. 8-10 minutes). Chef Darren is Chef de Cuisine and Co-owner of Chives Canadian Bistro, 3. When the mussels are open, drain the cooking liquor into a 12” sauté pan, set the mussel aside covered to stay Halifax, N.S. Top 100 restaurants – “Where to Eat in Canada” Best Fine hot. On high heat, reduce the liquor by 1/2 to 2/3 so that it creates a sauce of a consistency that will clings to Dining – “The Coast” Member of “La Chaine des Rotisseurs” world a wood spoon. Add the apples just long enough to warm through. gastronomical society. For reservation call (902) 420-9626, or online at 4. Transfer the mussels to a serving platter and pour the sauce over the top. www.chives.ca. 5. Garnish with sprigs of fresh rosemary and garlic croutons (optional).

Monogamy, Adultery and Polyamory By Shaun Bartone practiced by the FLDS community Professor of Law at UNB, focused on (reprinted from Fredericton Queery, in Bountiful, and the kind of ethical same-sex marriage and divorce. Enti- March 28, 2011) polyamoury that is practiced between tled “Adultery and other Impositions: Marriage, divorce, adultery; open consenting adults. There are however, the Seamy Side of Same-Sex Mar- marriage, monogamy, polyamoury. serious legal issues that impact people riage,” Karen gave a brief history of These were some of the topics who choose a polyamorous style of marriage and divorce law as it evolved that were explored from a queer relationship. In Canada, it is illegal for from church law, how it was encoded perspective at two workshops held three or more persons to share their in both common law and Canadian at the QTC Qulture Club on March lives together in a “conjugal” style marriage statues, and how it came 15 and 22. relationship, that is, a relationship that to include same-sex marriage. She The first workshop, on March appears to have all the functions of a discussed how the courts in the US 15, was a presentation on various spousal or marriage relationship. Such and Canada have grappled with the alternatives within adult intimate a relationship is illegal under federal various kinds of sexual acts between relationships, including monogamy, law and can be prosecuted as such two men or two women that might open marriage and polyamoury. All without requiring evidence that the constitute adultery. She discussed het- of these alternatives are possible persons involved are sexually intimate erosexual divorce cases that involved whether one or more persons in with each other. The presenter made allegations of adultery by one spouse the relationships are involved in a it clear that she was not presenting with a same-sex lover. The two most formal marriage or not. Generally, polyamoury from the perspective of recent cases happened in British the majority of married couples in a religious community or cult, nor Columbia and New Brunswick. The Participants discuss the topic at hand during a break in the “Adultery and other Impositions: North American society are also was it necessarily part of the “kink” case in New Brunswick involved a the Seamy Side of Same-Sex Marriage” workshop. monogamous, but other relation- community. She also cautioned that wife who had an extra-marital rela- ship styles are being practiced. The adults who choose to engage in tionship with another woman. More marriage, which has generally con- and sexual freedom that gay people presenter reviewed the various social, polyamorous relationships should be broadly, Karen discussed the ways in tributed to the social oppression of have fought to achieve. It can impose personal and legal factors that affect careful about disclosing the nature of which divorce law punished women’s women while it rewards men legally a standard of monogamy and rigid- polyamorous relationships. She also their relationships to employers and sexual freedom (aka, adultery) more and financially. She also discussed the ity in marriage that some gay people, reviewed some of the law concern- the community at large. Meanwhile, severely, while its approach to male ways in which marriage imposes a as well as some straight people, find ing polyamorous relationships, and various advocacy groups work to infidelity was more lenient. She placed heterosexual standard on gay relation- oppressive. discussed the government’s case secure the right of consenting adults this in the context of the history of ships that can suppress the cultural against polygyny in Bountiful, BC. to engage in non-monogamous re- She contrasted the questionable eth- lationships without sanction of law. ics of forced and under-age polygy- The second workshop, on March nous marriages, such as are allegedly 22, presented by Karen Pearlston, Time… to think about investing.

It’s never too early, or too late, to start investing. But what’s the best option for you and your lifestyle? That’s where a qualied Investors Group Consultant and The Plan™ , our unique, personalized approach to nancial planning, can help. A Consultant will advise you on how to improve your saving and investment habits and help you make the very most of your money. Live your dream. Call me to nd out more about how The Plan™ can Have you made your help you prosper now… and over time. RRSP contributions yet? Krista Snow Everyone dreams of a future with For our Free Special Report on RRSPs Consultant or a personal, financial consultation, contact: a comfortable retirement. An (902) 457-3050 RRSP can help you to lower your M.D. (Mike) Williams krista.snow @investorsgroup.com taxes, grow your savings in a tax ...solid financial solutions sheltered environment, while pro- viding for your future. 902-481-5645 or 1-800-450-2425 Proud Member of the GLBT Community. E-mail: [email protected] We can objectively shop the www.williams-wealth-management.com financial marketplace for the RRSP

solution that is right for you. ™Trademarks owned by IGM Financial Inc. and licensed to its subsidiary corporations. MP1343 (10/2007) Wayves ­— May 2011 — 11 LGBT Community Development Conference between young and old people, to years, there was substantial interest connecting the ElderBerries with Gay in a community centre. The group Straight Alliances, to organizing an discussing the Community Centre Elders Speakers Bureau. There were envisioned NSRAP taking a role in suggestions that high school and uni- governance, programming which versity students could be encouraged would include events of interest to to document history via research and a mixture of ages, establishing the oral history methods, getting elders to facility in association with businesses recount their memories of coming and the municipality, and providing out and other aspects of their lives the finance model. As next steps, as LGBT people in the 1970s. the group suggested making a ban- ner for the Halifax Pride Parade, and Educational to develop a Skype and Facebook presence. Outreach With the large number of teachers LGBTQ* History present, it’s no surprise that there was The group identified four phases of a contingent discussing integration. a possible history project: collecting Participants discussed coordina- stories, making use of those stories in tion through a task force, teachers the form of books, ‘zines and blogs; supporting each other and creating creating an LGBT History Month; a consistent resource, training for creative outputs such as art, writings, all educators, Gay-Straight Alliance plays, additions to the online LGBT LGBT leaders gather for the conference at the Harbourside Mariott. Photo by hotel staff. groups, and working with the Depart- encyclopedia, a “History Gayme”; ment of Education. and a lecture series. By Daniel MacKay people’s stories. The group itself nity organizer from Cape Breton. “I All of these initiatives will be On March 18 and 19, forty-five or- set the agenda, but all the projects guess it shouldn’t have been a surprise Community coordinated by NSRAP. If you are ganizers of the LGBT community that we tackled on the last day - and to see we share a lot of the same Centre interested in joining any of them, in Nova Scotia were assembled by I think there’s some overlap, espe- challenges, but to know that some email [email protected] or call (902) As in previous meetings of the 444-3206. NSRAP in a workshop series spon- cially in Education, History and the communities still face road blocks to LGBT community over the last few sored by the provincial Department Intergenerational stuff- they all link acceptance because of homophobic of Economic and Rural Develop- back to homophobia to me. That we municipal leaders is just unacceptable. ment and Tourism, entitled the still need to get our stories out there. The conference instilled a sense of Community Development Policy Finally, it was historic. We had queers unity amongst the provincial com- Initiative. “The workshop is called from all over the province talking and munities, and I’m sure this solidarity ‘Collaborative Strategies in Commu- working on ideas of how to make will lead to stronger communities and nity Development’ and the purpose is this community stronger. And we more wide spread acceptance of the to bring community leaders together ended the weekend with a provincial LGBT community.” to explore community initiatives and network of folks who are interested At the end of the first day, out-of- identify common areas for collabo- in keeping the conversation - and the town participants got free admission ration through the principles of the work - going.” to the Go Green concert at Menz Bar. community development policy,” says The process of identifying and The second day of the conference organizer Ross MacDonald. illustrating the participants’ interests had an emphasis on action; partici- The event was tagged, “A strong and concerns is known as “Apprecia- pants were asked to identify one thing and effective LGBTQ community tive Inquiry,” focusing on what is al- that could be acted on immediately. in NS,” and MacDonald pointed out ready working well in the community. The following notes on each topic that we are the largest minority in Using this method participants create resulted: the province, larger than the black a big list of issues they are interested community, Gaelic or Acadian and in then select a very short list (in Intergenerational yet, there is no office of LGBTQ this case four, broken out below) for Affairs in the provincial government. further discussion. Each topic is then Stories Participants ranged in age from assigned to an area of the room, and The existence of three separate teenagers to people in their late 60s, participants can move around and groups for History, Intergenerational with a range of occupations and spend as much time contributing to Stories, and Intergenerational Sharing interests and an emphasis on K-12 a topic as he or she wants. showed that there was a strong inter- educators. “It was truly an honour and a est in telling, recording, and commu- “It was exciting and frustrating,” pleasure to meet and network with nicating the complex history of our said organizer Hugo Dann, “not other community leaders from across community. The groups identified enough time to tackle everything. It the province,” says Peter Steele, issues ranging from children’s books, was also incredibly moving, hearing Wayves correspondent and commu- to social media, to meals shared 12 — May 2011 — Wayves W ay v e s G r o u p s A n d S e r v i c e s and games to more serious current event through education and a needle exchange com, meets every Monday (at 8pm) at St Atlantic Canada discussions impacting the GLTBQ commu- program. Call the office for details. 652-2437 Nova Scotia (902) Matthews United Church, 1479 Barrington Al-Anon/Alateen: for families & friends of nity. email: [email protected] web: http:// email: [email protected] web: www.aids- Hepatitis Outreach Society: Since 1999 St, Halifax (Use side door near Maritime problem drinkers. Does someone you know www.unb.ca/clubs/spectrum/ (Group Meets saintjohn.com the Hepatitis Outreach Society has been Centre at bottom of stairs) providing support, education and prevention have a drinking problem?. 466-7077 web: Fridays at 5:30 pm (subject to change, see Gay Men’s Supper Club: web: www.port- Anonymous HIV/AIDS Testing: 455-9656 www.freewebs.com/alanonmaritimes webpage for updates)) at University of New information for those infected and affected cityrainbowpride.com, meets 3rd Saturday by hepatitis in the province of Nova Scotia. Bedford United Church: An Affirming Min- Brunswick - Fredericton Campus, Marshall (See webpage for more information) at 220 AtlanticCanadianLesbians: Online Group D’Avry Hall, Room 235 420-1767 in HRM or 1-800-521-0572 istry of the United Church of Canada - ALL For Lesbians from the Atlantic Provinces. Germain St. Saint John New Brunswick email: [email protected] web: welcome. 835-8497 email: bedfordunited@ UNB/STU Women’s Collective: Women of PFLAG: Provides support to anyone deal- www.HepatitisOutreach.com at Our office eastlink.ca web: www.bedfordunited.com, AtlanticPoz: A new discussion group is all ages and orientations. , meets every for individuals living with HIV in Atlantic ing with issues of sexual orientation and/or is located at 2973 Oxford Street, between meets every Sunday (9 am service - Casual Monday at 5pm at the University Women’s gender identity. (506)648-9700 or 648-9227 Liverpool and Cork streets. Please call to and contemporary - with free coffee and muf- Canada. web: health.groups.yahoo.com/ Centre at the SUB group/atlanticpoz/ email: [email protected] web: make an appointment or email Program@ fins before church to take into this service. www.pflagcanada.ca/saintjohn, meets 1st HepatitisOutreach.com. 11 am service - Quieter and more reverent in Egale Canada - Atlantic: (888) 204-7777 Friday (1st Friday of each month September tone, coffee after service. June 13 to around email: [email protected] web: www. Moncton SUNS GLB Constituency Committee: 494- - June from 7:00- 9:00 p.m. No meeting in 6654 at c/o the Students’ Union of NS September 12 we have one 10 am service.) egale.ca AIDS Moncton: offers support to people liv- July & August. ) at 116 Coburg Street in Saint at 1200 Bedford Hwy at Sullivan’s Hill, near Gender Expressions Atlantic: Support for ing with HIV and their families and friends, John, New Brunswick in the Community The Rainbow - Atlantic Awareness Society: Atlantic Gardens education and awareness. 506-859-9616 email: [email protected] transgendered individuals ranging from Health Centre next to St. Joseph’s Hospital. BLT-Womyn of Halifax: Bi Sexauls, Lesbian, Crossdressers to Transexuals. email: gen- email: [email protected] web: www.sida-aidsmoncton.com at (506- Port City Rainbow Pride: Pride Celebrations Venus Envy Bursary Society: An annual Transgender Womyn’s Discussion Group. [email protected] (No sched- Committee. email: events@portcityrainbow- award open to all women studying in NS. Sue’s # 499-0335 email: sueandrews1964@ uled meeting. Occasional social events, by 859-4726 fax) 80 Weldon St, Moncton, NB, E1C 5V8 pride.com web: www.portcityrainbowpride. web: www.venusenvy.ca/halifax hotmail.com web: ca.groups.yahoo.com/ invitation only.) com group/blt-womynofhalifax/ (Every second PFLAG: Supporting all people with ques- Healing Our Nations: Healing Our Na- Saint John LGBTQ Lending Library: over 300 Amherst Sunday evening 6pm - 7:30pm ) at Dalhousie tions is an Aboriginal HIV/AIDS service tions or concerns about sexual orientation Women’s Centre 6286 South Street (Beside and gender identity issues. (506) 869-8191 fiction and non-fiction titles. 634-8288 email: Sexual Health Centre Cumberland County: organization that serves the Atlantic region. [email protected] (open Monday Dalplex Driveway) Hope to see you at the 1.800.565.4255 email: director@access- email: [email protected] web: Open and inclusive services: information, next meeting! www.pflagcanada.ca/moncton.html, meets through Friday, 9 AM to noon.) at the office education, workshops, free condoms. 667- wave.ca web: www.hon93.ca (Training of- of Centenary Queen Square United Church DalOUT: DalOUT is the award-winning fered on request at no charge for Aboriginal 3rd Monday (Occassionally on the 2nd 7500 email: [email protected] web: Monday — please call) at 7:30-9:30pm, at 215 Wentworth Street. cumberlandcounty.cfsh.info (9 - 5 drop-in or LGBTQ society at Dalhousie University. peoples and/or organizations.) at 15 Alder- We pride ourselves on hosting fun, engag- ney Dr., Suite 3, Dartmouth, NS. B2Y2N2 University of Moncton, Adrien-J.-Cormier The UNBSJ Q-Collective: A social and appt) at 11 Elmwood Drive (Side entrance). Bldg., Room 302 support organisation for UNBSJ students, Confidential, hassle-free. Free condoms. ing and educational events for the entire Maritime Transgender Workplace Solutions staff and faculty. 506-648-5737 web: www. Halifax community. email: [email protected] Project: Transgender Issues Workshops and River of Pride-riviere de fierte INC. of Greater The Cumberland Pride Society: for: gay, les- web: www.dalout.ca, meets 2nd Thursday, Moncton: The organization meets regularly, unbsj.ca/clubs/qcollective (The UNBSJ bian, bisexual, transgender and transsexual information resource. email: denisesined@ Q-Collective is interested in hearing from and 4th Thursday (from 6 p.m. until 7 p.m.) at ns.sympatico.ca web: www3.ns.sympatico. to discuss upcoming events and activities, individuals. 660-5143 email: cumberland- the Dalhousie Student Union Building (6136 everyone is welcome to attend. check out other university LGBTQ organisations and [email protected] web: cumberland-pride. ca/winpapernews (No meetings, Workshops would like to possibly meet or collaborate.) University Ave., Room 321) by arrangements, Information source when time / location posted on the website. Media sytes.net, meets 3rd Monday (7-9 PM) and general inquiries, including registration at Various locations; event particulars will Frontrunners Halifax: Running/walking club. requested. Newsletter Odds & Sods bi- be emailed to anyone who registers with 422-7579 email: Bruce.Greenfield@dal. weekly) of volunteers and parade particpation, can Annapolis Valley be made from the website or by email. the UNBSJ Q-Collective and/or who gets ca web: www.frontrunners.org/clubs/index. Mr Atlantic Canada Leather Society: Dedi- email: [email protected] web: the UNBSJ weekly “E News”. Past events Valley Gay Men’s Coffee House: meets on php?club=Halifax, meets every Saturday, cated to developing gay leather communi- www.fiertemonctonpride.ca (See webpage include the annual Rainbow Peace March, a regular basis for coffee and talk, hosts a and every Tuesday, and every Thursday ties in the Atlantic region. email: waydo7@ for schedule.) guest speakers, movie nights, participation monthly dance when attendance permits. (Sat: 9:30am, Tue: 6:00 pm, Thu: 6:00pm ) hotmail.com in Maritime Pride Parades, Supporters of 825-3197,363-2055 email: menembracing- at Main gates of the Halifax Public Gardens, Transgendered Peer Support Group : PFLAG Canada’s “Communities Encour- corner of Spring Garden Road and South Names Project (AIDS Memorial Quilt): Open to all M2F, F2M, Andro and trans- [email protected] web: faceitwithpride.tripod. panels - helping create, and lending. 902- age Campaign” and “Champions Against com (email or call for locations or special Park Street. supporters from across Atlantic Canada. Homophobia”. 454-5158 email: [email protected]. email: [email protected] events or themes) GAY, LESBIAN & BISEXUAL YOUTH ca web: www.quilt.ca (Call if interested in GROUP AT Q.E.H.: Jeanie Buffet, Counsel- volunteering or making a panel) at 3544 Un sur Dix - University of Moncton Asso- Woodstock Antigonish lor, at 421-6797 Acadia St. Halifax, NS B3K 3P2 ciation for the LGBT community and their allies (not only for students): The mission is Woodstock GLBT Youth Advocate and Rainbow Warriors: Rainbow Warriors is a Get Out, Halifax!: Recreation activities (team Narcotics Anonymous: a fellowship of re- to ensure the well-being of the community Family OutReach: Books, movies, advice, activities, cycling, running, rowing - you covering drug addicts who meet regularly to youth-run support group for LGBTQ youth and to end homophobia (mainly a french as- directions, contacts, and support etc. for and allies in Antigonish. We hold social name it) for metro & beyond!. web: www. help each other stay clean. 1-800-205-8402 sociation, but also organizes some bilingual the family. 328-4868 email: richardb@ getouthalifax.ca at Visit and get on the email web: centralnovaarea.ca at Call the phone events such as picnics and game nights, activities). For more information, please visit nbnet.nb.ca have educational discussions around top- list for more info. number or visit the web page for meeting the website. email: [email protected] Girl-ish Productions: Girl-ish puts on hot times and places. ics such as stereotypes/assumptions and web: etudiants.umoncton.ca/umcm-unsurdix Newfoundland & transsexuality, and raise awareness in the and heavy bi-monthly-ish dance parties Project E: Presentation for youth, on gender Lab (709) surrounding community by participating for queer-ish folks and their friends. web: expression, myth busters, proper terminol- Petit-Rocher in functions such as the Highland Games www.girlish.ca ogy and other facts. web: www.freewebs. Frontrunners Newfoundland and Labrador: Parade and the Farmers’ Market. While our (Bathurst area) Running/walking club. 722-5791 or 753- Hal-Gal Mailing List: Low-traffic Yahoo group com/xprojecte/ at available via web page group is youth-focused everyone is regard- providing events and information for queer Wayves Magazine: Atlantic Canada’s Gais.es Nor Gays Inc. (GNG): A bilingual 9529 email: tonybrathwaite@bellaliant. less of age, and gender identity or sexual net,[email protected] (meeting women in the Halifax area. email: hal-gal@ queer news and lifestyle magazine!. email: volunteer association serving gay men, orientation! Find our group on Facebook yahoogroups.com web: groups.yahoo.com/ [email protected] web: wayves.ca lesbians and bisexuals of northern New times can be flexible to accommodate new “Rainbow Warriors - AAHA!”. email: an- runners.) group/hal-gal/ (Join the list to keep in touch (Deadline: the first Friday of every month; Brunswick. email: [email protected] web: [email protected], meets or post your events.) Editorial meeting: the Monday following that; www.gngnb.ca (Dances are held at GNG every Monday (3:00-5:00pm) at The Antigo- club every Saturday night. See www.gngnb. St. John’s nish Women’s Resource Centre, located in Halifax Sexual Health Centre: Anonymous layout the Sunday following that. Email us to HIV testing, open and inclusive sexual health be put on our notification list!) ca for a list of upcoming events.) at 702 the Kirk Building at 219 Main Street, Suite rue Principale, Petit-Rocher NB. Look for AIDS Committee of Newfoundland & Lab- 204 (above Tim Hortons). clinical services, education and workshops. rainbow flag and/or door with pink triangle rador: HIV/AIDS education and support for Everyone welcome. Confidential and non- New Brunswick male/female/transgendered, all ages, New- X-Pride: social & support group at X. 867- judgmental. 455-9656 web: www.HSHC.ca at rear of parking lot. 5007 web: www.stfx.ca/people/xpride (506) foundland and Labrador 579-8656 email: Imperial and Sovereign Court of Atlantic [email protected] web: www.acnl.net Sackville NB/ Nova Society: Fundraising. 902-449-7612 Fredericton Gay Urban Youth Zone Project: designed Bridgewater web: www.imperialcourtns.com, meets Amherst NS to increase HIV/AIDS, Hepatitis C, and STI Sexual Health Centre for Lunenburg County: 1st Sunday, and 2nd Sunday (Executive AIDS New Brunswick / SIDA Nouveau- knowledge and awareness 579-8656 (ext. Meetings Are Currently Held Every Second Brunswick: committed to facilitating com- Catalyst: Catalyst, Mount Allison’s Queer- Confidential info, education&support for eve- Straight Alliance, provides support & in- 28) web: www.acnl.net at Tommy Sexton ryone. Safer sex supplies, library, pamphlets, Sunday) at Meeting Locations Vary munity-based responses to the issues of Centre 47 Janeway Place Pleasantville, HIV/AIDS. Needle exchange located in formation for all Mt. A students, staff, and workshops. 527-2868 email: LunCo@NS- Integrity: Integrity is an organization of GLBT faculty through meetings, seminars, and across from the old Janeway Hospital AIDS SexualHealth.ca web: www.theSHaC.org Anglicans and their friends, to encourage office at 65 Brunswick Street Fred. E3B Committee of Newfoundland and Labrador 1G5. 459-7518 email: jennifer@aidsnb. social events. Everyone is welcome. email: (Hours vary. Open by appointment or by Christian gay men and lesbians in their com web: www.aidsnb.com (Office Hours: [email protected] web: www.mta.ca/clubs/ LBGT-MUN Resource Centre: LBGT-MUN is chance. Please call ahead. ) at 4 Hillcrest spiritual life; to support the Church in its Monday to Friday, 8:30AM to 12:30PM and catalyst/ (Catalyst meets approximately an information/resource, service, and peer Street Unit 8, Bridgewater. (On the corner commitment to seek and serve Christ in all 1:30PM to 4:30PM) every week from Sept-Dec and Jan-April. support centre staffed by trained volunteers!. of Dufferin and Hillcrest Streets). Closed people; and to reach out to the GLBT com- For meeting info contact the president at 737-7619 email: [email protected] (Open during summers. munity in Christian love and service. (902) Fredericton Lesbians and Gays: Email [email protected] or the Students’ Adminis- Monday-Friday 9-4. Biweekly meetings for South Shore Pride Social Club: for 19 & 425-8383 web: www.integritycanada.org, listserv of events/news in the Fredericton for trative Council at [email protected].) members and volunteers. ) at Smallwood/ meets 3rd Sunday (4:00pm) at All Saints gblt men and women. email: [email protected] older. 530-5986 web: www.southshorepride. University Center, UC-6022. Building located ca, meets 3rd Saturday (-- dances -- 9:00PM Cathedral Integrity: Supports and encourages Gays Sackville on Prince Phillip Drive. Call us! Get involved! to 1:00AM) at Call or email for location. Koinonia Ecumenical Church: Meaning and Lesbians in their spiritual lives. email: LBGTQ Youth Group: A monthly gathering PFLAG: Support and education for GLBT- ‘community’. Koinonia is an ecumenical faith [email protected] web: www.fa- for queer, allied, questioning, and any inter- Halifax community offering open membership, equal cebook.com/group.php?gid=46207976587, T2IQQ persons, friends & family. 506-536- ested youth. We offer social events such as 4245 email: [email protected], meets marriage, practicing bible, church, religious meets 3rd Sunday (4:00pm) at Unitarian bowling, movie nights, and coffee houses. Affirm United: GLBT & Friends support, ac- and soul freedom,as well as open table Fellowship of Fredericton at 874 York Street 2nd Monday (7:30 to 9:30pm No meeting Contact group coordinator Rob Sinnott at tion and worshipping community within the in July and August.) at Meeting location: communion. Koinonia offers Spiritual Care. PFLAG: Support & education on issues of the number listed, email, or visit the web United Church. 461-4528 email: alstew@ Crisis support visitation and counselling for sexual orientation & gender identity. (506) United Church Parlours, 112 Main Street in page for more info. 699-0509 email: lbgtq@ eastlink.ca Sackville, NB an honorarium. ALL are Welcome who cel- 455-7190 email: [email protected] nlsexualhealthcentre.org web: nlsexual- AIDS Coalition of Nova Scotia: non-profit, ebrate God’s Covenant to Love All of God’s web: www.geocities.com/Pflagfredericton/, healthcentre.org community-based AIDS organization, pro- Creation. We are a registered charitable or- meets 4th Tuesday (7-9 pm (except Decem- Saint John PFLAG Canada: Information or referral to vincially mandated. Provides direct service ganization accepting donations from all who ber: 2nd Tuesday)) at Unitarian Fellowship Affirming United Church - Centenary - Queen one of our parents. web: www.pflag.ca (For and support for people living with HIV/AIDS believe in the promotion of our all-inclusive of Fredericton 874 York St. Fredericton NB Square United Church: invites you to wor- support or information on chapter meetings and also offers various prevention programs community of faith. Contact Rev. Elaine @ E3B 3R8 ship!. 506-634-8288 email: cqsunited@ regarding PFLAG Canada contact Gemma across NS. You can reach us locally to HRM 902-876-8771 for more information, or mail Spectrum: Spectrum is a social/support nb.aibn.com web: www.cqsunited.ca, meets Schlamp-Hickey, Atlantic Director at gem- at 425-4882 or across the province at 1-800- your contribution to 2410 St. Margaret’s group celebrating the diversity of the GLBTQ every Sunday (10:30am) at 215 Wentworth [email protected] or Diana Deacon, St. 566-2437. (902)425-4882 email: acns@ Bay Road Halifax N.S. B3T 1H1 with your community and gay-friendly peoples at UNB St, Saint John, NB John’s chapter contact at [email protected]) acns.ns.ca web: www.acns.ns.ca name and address so we can issue your tax and STU. Weekly meetings are open for both Alcoholics Anonymous: Live & Let Live AA receipt. 876-8771 email: koinonia@eastlink. AIDS Saint John: To improve the quality St. John’s Pride Inc: St. John’s Official Pride ca (we gather bi-weekly at 12:30pm - 1:30 students and non-students to attend, and of life for those infected & affected by HIV/ Organization. email: [email protected] Group for LGBT community. (902) 425- may feature various ‘theme’ nights from fun 8383/422-4972 email: courage449@yahoo. followed by a time of fellowship) at Petrie’s AIDS, and to reduce the spread of HIV web: www.stjohnspride.org Halifax Feast Dinner Theatre, Maritime Wayves ­— May 2011 — 13

Centre - entrance on the corner of Barrington manifest the Divine. 429-2904 web: halifax. Centre is located at 22 King Street, Post Sunday (of the month from 6:30-8:30pm. No for schedule.) & Salter Streets quaker.ca, meets every Sunday at Library Office Centre, Lunenburg. meetings for June, July or August.) at Fam- RESPECT: Students Making Healthy Deci- Manna For Health: A special needs referral at Atlantic School of Theology, Franklyn St. ily Place Resource Centre 106 Townsend sions. 893-6300 email: [email protected] food bank for those living with life threatening All very welcome. Middleton Street, Sydney NS at P.O. Box 550, Nova Scotia Agricultural illness. 429-7670 Queer Play: A Queer performing arts group Pride Cape Breton Society: Dances and So- College, Truro, N.S. B2N 5E3 in Halifax NS. email: [email protected] PFLAG: Information and support for GLBT cial Events. Monthly dances are Adults Only! MomSquared: CALLING ALL LESBIAN community and their friends and families. SAAFE (Supporting An Alternative Friendly MOMS. I know you’re out there! A group for Safe Harbour Metropolitan Community Check website community events. (902) Environment): Social/support group at the 902-825-0548 email: middletonns@pflag- 539-4627 email: [email protected] lesbian moms to connect and provide sup- Church: A Christian Church with an affirming canada.ca web: www.pflagcanada.ca/mid- NS Agricultural College. 893-6300 email: port and friendship to each other as well as ministry to the GBLT community. Everyone web: www.pridecapebreton.com (Dances [email protected] (Meetings as requested. dleton.html (Check online for meeting times on the last Saturday of every month. Check friendship and interaction for our children. is welcome!. 453-9249 email: safeharbour@ and locations- or phone 825-0548) Membership changes each academic year.) email: [email protected] web: eastlink.ca web: safeharbourmcc.com, website for dance and special event dates!) momsquared.weebly.com meets every Sunday (11 am) at Veith House, at Southend Community Centre. Maps are New Glasgow at our website. Wolfville Mount Pride: LGBTQ group at Mount Saint 3115 Veith Street, Halifax Acadia Women’s Centre: 585-2140 email: Vincent University. email: mountpride@ Spirituality For Lesbians: We seek to deepen Pictou County Centre for Sexual Health: 695- mountstudents.ca, meets 1st Tuesday, and 3366 email: [email protected] Tatamagouche [email protected] (Acadia SUB our relationship with God, knowing that God Second Level Balcony ) 3rd Tuesday (bi-weekly on Tuesdays at 245 loves us and calls us into life just as he has Pictou County Women’s Centre: Offering Tatamagouche Centre: We are an affirm- ) at Meetings in the Diversity Center in Rose- created us. Persons of every or no denomi- Individual Support Counselling and Crisis ing centre, welcoming all gay, lesbian, and ria. Possible events that are being planned nation are welcome. 459-2649, meets 2nd Intervention, Information and Referral, transgendered people. 1.800.218.2220 Yarmouth for the year include sexuality awareness, Wednesday (7:30-9PM, phone for meeting Advocacy and Accompaniment, Programs email: [email protected] web: www. South West Nova Pride: GLBT of any age movies nights, social events, guest speak- locations) and Community Education. 755-4647 email: tatacentre.ca are invited,we meet as a social gathering ers, and many more. There are always LG- Team Halifax: All GLBT over 18, athletes [email protected] and peer support group on the 2nd last BTQ community events to be involved with and performance artists, as well as anyone Truro Wednesday of each month at 7:00PM in the and events that are always fun. This group willing to help out. 422-9510 web: www. New Minas / Beacon United Church parlour 25 Beacon is open to anyone who would like to join. teamhalifax.com (No fixed schedule at this Annapolis Valley Central Nova Women’s Resource Centre: St. Yarmouth. We are not church affiliated. Nova Scotia Rainbow Action Project: time, look on website for further details.) Resources, programs and services available 645-2914 email: [email protected] for all women identified women. Advocacy NSRAP, the Nova Scotia Rainbow Action The Masculine Spectrum: is a new support Valley Youth Project: Sexual Orientation. web: SWNovaPride.com Project: for 15 years the leading advocate for Gender Identity. Allies. Youth. email: val- and support - with outreach to rural areas. group for all transgender, transsexual, & Also, see our Facebook group. Central Nova Nova Scotia’s Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and trans men, FtMs, female assigned at birth [email protected] (6-8:30 most Prince Edward Transgender Community. Fostering change Wednesdays through May) at New Minas Women’s Resource Centre http://cnwrc. genderqueers, two-spirited, intersexed, & weebly.com, [email protected] 535 Prince Island (902) in our communities through education, out- questioning people 18 years of age or older, Civic Center, 9209 Commercial St. Ages 25 reach, and political action. 444.3206 email: & under. Free bus tickets available. Free Street, Truro, NS B2N 1E8 (902) 895-4295. Gay PEI Mailing List: Electronic mailing list of all sexual orientations. No significant oth- web: cnwrc.weebly.com [email protected] web: www.nsrap.ca at TBA ers, friends, family, or allies please. web: food. Fun activities. Join us on Facebook for all GLBT, questioning and friendly, focus Outlaw: GLBTQ & Allies Law Students As- ca.groups.yahoo.com/group/genderspec- at http://www.facebook.com/pages/Valley- Colchester Sexual Assault Centre: Provides is on PEI. email: gay-pei-owner@yahoog- sociation at Dalhousie Law School. email: trum/, meets 2nd Sunday at Just Us Cafe, Youth-Project/22418494995 support and information to anyone (GBLTQ roups.com web: groups.yahoo.com/group/ [email protected] web: www.facebook. 5896 Spring Garden Road included) affected by sexual assault and gay-pei at All first posts are moderated to com/group.php?gid=2416842853 (Meetings Sydney abuse. 902-897-4366 email: trurosexualas- stop spambots, otherwise, it’s an open list. The Youth Project: Support, education and [email protected] (Centre Hours Mon- vary. Please email for further information social activities for youth 25 and under GLBT Youth group: Safe Space Drop-Ins. or check out our Facebook group.) at Dal- AIDS Coalition of Cape Breton: Support, Thurs 9:30-4:30) at 80 Glenwood Drive, 367-3408 or toll free 1 877 380 5776 (E-mail across Nova Scotia. Weekly events, plus a advocacy, prevention/education for those Truro Nova Scotia houisie Law School. 6061 University Avenue. youth food bank and Health nurse on site. us for further details.) at 144 Prince St. Halifax, Nova Scotia. infected or affected by HIV/AIDS. Free con- 429-5429 email: youthproject@youthproject. doms! Queer Advocacy and Education, Nee- Northern AIDS Connection Society: HIV PFLAG Canada - PEI: Providing support, PFLAG: Support & education on issues of ns.ca web: www.youthproject.ns.ca (Please dle Distribrution, Food Bank, Coffee,Safe prevention education initiative serving education and advocacy for GLBT persons, sexual orientation & gender identity. These see our website for an up-to-date calendar Space for those infected or affected. (902) counties Colchester, Pictou, Cumberland & their families and friends in PEI. 902-887- meetings are open to all. For more informa- of events.) 567-1766 Toll Free 1-877-597-9255 email: East Hants. 895-0931 email: nacs@eastlink. 3620 email: [email protected] web: www. tion please feel free to contact Michelle Mal- [email protected] web: www. ca web: northernaidsconnectionsociety.ca pflagcanada.ca (Meetings take place on an Trans Family Nova Scotia: Trans Family (Our Board of Directors meet bi-monthly ette by phone or email. Hope you’ll join us!. is an open & supportive space welcoming accb.ns.ca (Free Anonmymous Testing as needs basis.) at Check with Mary or Bill 431-8500 email: halifaxns@pflagcanada. 1-902-567-1123 Monday and Tuesday each on the third Thursday of the month. Annual Kendrick on this months location by calling families,friends and allies as well as trans General Meeting held regularly in June. See ca, meets 1st Thursday (We meet on the and genderqueer folk themselves. If you are week from 8:30 to 4:30 and Thursdays from 902-887-3620. 1st Thursday of each month from 6:30 -8:30 8:30 to Noon. Check our Website for events webpage for contact numbers in your area unable to join us at a meeting for any reason, of northern Nova Scotia.) at 33 Pleasant pm 902-431-8500) at Youth Project, 2281 we can you help source resources and refer and updates. ) at 150 Bentinck St, Sydney, Charlottetown Brunswick St, Halifax N.S. B1P 1G6 Street, Truro, N.S. you to other appropriate organizations to AIDS PEI: AIDS PEI offers HIV prevention Play Group for Queer Families: 422-8780 help meet your needs. For more information, Cape Breton University Sexual Diversity Rainbow Proud: Rainbow Proud sup- ports the LGBT** community of Truro and and support services to all residents of PEI. (3-5pm) at Board Room (Play Room) at please feel free to call or email Michelle. 902- Centre: We provide a welcoming environ- 902-566-2437 email: [email protected] web: Needham Community Recreation Centre, 431-8500 email: [email protected], ment for GLBTQ people and their Allies. surrounding areas. Our small group of volunteers work hard to put events together www.aidspei.com at 375 University Ave, Unit 3372 Devonshire St (north end Halifax, near meets 3rd Monday (6:30 to 8:30 pm) at The 902-563-1481 email: [email protected] 2, Charlottetown PE, C1A 4N4 intersection of Duffus & Novalea, bus routes Youth Project 2281 Brunswick St., Halifax (Monday to Thursday 8:30-5 or by appoint- for everyones enjoyment. Any feedback will be considered and can be sent to our ARC -- Abegweit Rainbow Collective: 7 & 9) Bring a snack for your child(ren). We Universalist Unitarian Church: an inclusive ment) at the Students’ Union Building, Cape will be collecting money from each family Breton University. email address. We hope you continue to Serving GLBT Islanders, their friends and liberal religious community 429-5500 email: come celebrate our community together. families. 894-5776 email: [email protected] to cover the cost of the room rental, likely [email protected] web: UUCH.ca , $2-4 per week. PFLAG: Peer support & education on issues email: [email protected] web: web: www.arcofpei.com, meets 1st Monday meets every Sunday (10:30; see website for of sexual orientation & gender identity. email: rainbowproudnovascotia.ca (See webpage (6:00pm at 375 University Ave Suite # 2 Pride Week: Producers of Atlantic Canada’s special events) at 5500 Inglis St [email protected], meets last Charlottetown, PE) largest LGBTQ cultural festival. 431-1194 email: [email protected] web: www. Kentville halifaxpride.ca prideHealth: prideHealth is a program of Red Door: Youth Health & Support Centre. Capital Health and the IWK Health Centre. Information and services for sexual health. If you are a member of the pride community Ages 13 - 30. 679-1411 web: thereddoor. and need support with any kind of health ca (Monday to Friday 2pm to 6pm) at 150 care call Anita our Clinical Nursing Special- Park Street ist, number below. She is available free of charge, offers complete confidentiality, Lunenburg and can also give you support if you are Second Story Women’s Centre: We offer a experiencing homo or transphobia. pride- meeting space for women, support counsel- Health- improving safe access to health ling, programs, and referrals. (902)640-3044 care. 220.0643 email: [email protected] web: www. Quakers: Quakerism emphasizes that we all secstory.com at Second Story Women’s

Where Halifax Men Cruise Lay Chaplaincy Services Universalist Unitarian Church of Halifax Free Full-Access With This Code: WANS 5500 Inglis Street, Halifax, Nova Scotia B3H 1J8 [email protected] 902-429-5500

Susan Stephen & Gwen Armshaw Lay Chaplains [email protected] [email protected] www.squirt.org

weddings memorials child dedications other rites of passage Halifax Cruising Listings • Live Webcam IM & Group Cam Chat • Halifax Profi les • XXX Pics & Member Videos • Try Squirt Mobile! 14 — May 2011 — Wayves The Last Word Grandparental Units By Randall Perry lationship with my father’s mother. Street West, where my youngest aunts ers, something more multi-layered A few months ago my parents be- When my parents were married in worked, to sit in a booth and listen than those they have with their came grandparents for the first time. 1967 my father moved his remain- to music from the wall-mounted, mothers. Grandmothers revel in their I think it looks good on them. My ing family from P.E.I. to Toronto, nickel-munching mini-jukes. We’d eccentricities and their odd permis- father, not yet 70, has had a couple where he and his father had been visit the pet shop and occasionally a siveness sends a subtle but clear of health issues over the last few living and working for awhile. Meme five-and-dime down the street where message to their little gay-in-training years and the photo of him, looking (Acadian, of course, we pronounced I would gravitate toward the station- grandsons: it’s okay to be different. A delighted but a touch befuddled, it “May-mee”) ery section little… or a lot. holding my newborn niece a picture took over my … gay men have unique and marvel For some of us—me, especially— I didn’t think for sure I’d see. It’s now daytime care at the paper it takes a little longer to clue in. When on my desk. My mother’s picture is a few weeks relationships with their and pens. I started my coming-out process to easy to read. The happy smile on her after I was W h e n my family in the late 80s I tried to face says it all. born when my grandmothers, something my parents hide myself away from Meme, whom My mother’s own grandmotherly Ocean is the first grandchild for mother had to more multi-layered than those moved back I ended up hurting (a long story, best quirks haven’t yet fully shown them- both sides of the family so I expect return to work. to P.E.I. in not told), but being a wise soul she selves. It’s like watching trees bud any more that come after her will Meme was they have with their mothers. 1975, Meme understood my fear and where it in spring: things start out small, but have lots to live up to. I attended as brand-new r e m a i n e d came from. Fear of loss, fear of re- blink and the tree is in full leaf. I sug- her baptism a number of weeks to the big city as I was to the world. in Toronto and we kept in touch jection, not only by family but by the gested a pair of granny glasses and ago (I called ahead to make sure the All these years later I still have memo- through letters. She moved back in world. In the end, she and I moved the response of one raised eyebrow church roof was reinforced) and I ries of my early childhood spent in the mid-90s, and after her passing past the hurt feelings and, feeling spoke volumes. now know full well what the term her care. Feelings, mostly, and flashes in 2000 I gathered up the scores of truly free for the first time, I found I think my niece is in for an inter- “doting grandparents” means. of images: our walks up Jameson Av- letters I’d saved from the early 80s the strength to start marching and esting ride. I really hope one day she I didn’t enjoy the status of “first enue, through the concrete grounds onward. They’re stored in a safe place. writing and speaking out, discover- discovers the joys of letter writing. grandchild” on either side of the of Parkdale Collegiate, ending up I think that gay men have unique ing my own unique way of moving [email protected] family, but I did have a unique re- at the Skyline Restaurant on Queen relationships with their grandmoth- and shaking.

Letters Vote! human rights. Secondly, the Harper Harper is the Liberal Party led by to all ages, or River of Pride takes a People may think that the dances Dear Wayves Readers plan for income splitting discrimi- Michael Ignatieff. closer look at Pride elsewhere in the does not seem to take that much The election is coming on May 2 nates against the LGBT community. Bill McKinnon Eastern Passage, Atlantic provinces and take a few money to put on but once the expens- and it’s your job to get out and vote And finally, if you elect a Liberal gov- NS pointers from them! es come due for that night it could be for whomever you choose. We have ernment there is a fair chance the next James M. around $600 to $700 depending on a democracy, or at least we did have. finance minister will be an openly gay Needed: New the number of people who attended In considering who to vote for, please man. You may choose to vote NDP as Farewell, South the dance before. consider the following. First of all, I did for years or for the Greens—it’s Moncton Pride Without the numbers each dance the Conservative government cut your choice and both are fine parties I have been living in Moncton for Shore Dances it can drop the funds really fast. We funding for activist organizations with great candidates. Please remem- the past 11 years and I am very dis- I thought I should pass this message need to have 40 people or more to including Egale and women’s groups ber however that the only party with appointed with how the Gay Pride along from myself and the South be able to pay for the expenses. If at to wage legal actions in court for your a hope in hell of defeating Stephen Committee runs things around here. Shore Pride Group before you hear any time there should be some sort of If you are not 50+ it is pretty much it from someone else. I am sad to fate and we may receive some funding a waste of time. Who wants to play inform you that we will no longer be we will be back. Bingo for a Pride activity? Or Disco holding Pride Dances at the Wileville So let’s hope and if anyone has any Bowling? The only thing that was Fire Hall. The funding for the dances ideas of how we can make another worth spending time to go to was is just not there. We have tried and dance happen please let me know at the Celebration at the Victoria Park, tried to do different things to get my email address jeffreywhynot@ it was a lot of fun and laughs. extra money and to draw new people hotmail.com and we can discuss to In my opinion, the biggest prob- in but it’s only so much a person can see if it is a possibility. So again thank lem with River of Pride is that they do. I have had people make donations you all for your support and hope to need to create events that will ap- which really helped for the dance that see you from time to time. peal to ALL ages, and by doing that was coming up but it does not help Jeff Whynot they will manage to get some new for the dances that were to follow. members and volunteers that are not senior citizens and who actually have the energy to make pride something worth going to! How about a teen night, Gay games day? Everything seems to be centered around Triangles. And the events that happen at other locations are normally not worth the cover that is charged. All year long, Pride Monc- ton has their hand in your pocket looking for donations, and you can’t even go to a Colour party without being harassed twenty times to buy a glow stick, or to pay $1 to sign your name on a cardboard heart. It’s bad enough that you have to pay $6 to go to a Colour party without getting chased all night by an old man with a glow stick waving in your face. I go to university and I am on a tight budget! My point is, with the money that they collect during the year with their little rainbow donation jugs and the crap they are selling, you shouldn’t even have to pay to attend events during Pride week. It’s time people of Moncton ei- ther started a committee that appeals Wayves ­— May 2011 — 15 Coming Out In the ‘Chi Part 1 By Nathan Adams I had an attraction towards men but from classmates, some family mem- attraction towards guys, I ended up When I created my website, monc- I wasn’t aware that there were other bers and friends regarding “faggots having girlfriends and explored my ton-magic.webs.com, in 2009 I asked people like me. I kept it to myself, and queers.” Everyone made it sound sexuality but always knew that even people to share stories and insights hoping that the feelings would fade like it was such a bad thing, that it was though I had feelings for them there about themselves, struggles that as I got older, that it was a stage that morally wrong, dirty, disgusting and was still something missing, still they’ve had and obstacles that they I was going through. just simply not the way things were something that I had to discover. had to overcome to get to where I lived supposed I was sixteen when I had my first they are today, with the intention of my life like I lived my life like any normal to be. Of encounter with a guy. I was trembling giving hope or advice to members of any normal teenager, hanging out with c o u r s e in fear that he would be angry or up- the LGBT community. The goal was teenager, I d i d n’t set, that he would tell everyone that to simply let people know that they h a n g i n g friends, doing sleepovers and wa n t t o I was a faggot. He was a good friend are not alone, that there are many out with crazy things to impress girls, be clas- and I had always thought he was so people just like them, and that we all f r i e n d s , sified or beautiful, always just wanted to just faced struggles to get to where we doing sleepovers and crazy things to considered one of those people so reach out hold him, kiss him. One day, are today. So to get the ball rolling, impress girls, and drove my parents I kept my feelings and thoughts to somehow, I managed to build up the I decided that I would share a few nuts with some of the trouble that I myself, afraid of the humiliation that I courage to do it. things about my life and how I got got myself into—but the feelings that would face if anyone knew that I was To be continued in the June issue of Wayves Graduation from high school - wow, to where I am today. I had towards guys never went away. gay. Or was I? I had hair! As I entered my teens, I realized I heard lots of negative comments So even though I had a very strong Discovering the Sunlight By Rob Thomson lies were concurrently pursuing I would retain my solitude. Certainly end. A Celtic pessimism and forebod- I guess that being alone began for similar tactics to fit offspring— there were advantages to being the ing engulfed me: why tempt fate with me considerably before I reached the gay, lesbian or straight—into silent sentinel. For one thing, my the distant future? age of ten. desired moulds. Let us just say perceptive powers sharpened con- Well in 1987 I did emerge from Reflecting now, it is likely that that I was born a number of years siderably. the existence of grey shadows that my parents feared that I was becom- too soon. “Different strokes for I was to spend many years in I had lived in for so long, and yet ing another daughter rather than a different folks” was not the re- another province. It was in this place my appearance was somewhat as the son. At any rate there seems to have sounding theme of the ’50s and that I saw so easily why extreme dis- cloudy release of a survivor. been a concerted effort by kith and early ’60s. cretion was a “must” and not simply a I awoke from this dazed stupor. kin to “toughen him up.” Even my University years provided a lot desirable trait. I was in a strange, new Bill was very much alive, he was in much younger brother was recruited of congenial company although land. All too often the communities Halifax and he actually waited for me! into the act! This continued until I one of very strong heterosexual I resided in where homophobic and He would become my lover, my part- left home to further my academic overtones. I developed a certain distrust of strangers were the rules ner and my ultimate soul mate. With education. By this time aloneness self-worth that had been sorely rather than the exceptions. Bill I have come into a new world of for me had evolved from a refuge missing up to this point. Yet I In the summer of 1986 I met Bill caring and sharing where a wealth into a boon. was to preserve a feeling of be- Romkey in Halifax. In the future he of hitherto undiscovered interests I am aware that family efforts ing the only one of my species was to give me happiness beyond my and friends abound. What mellow ostensibly performed on my behalf on the planet; after all why was I wildest dreams. We spent many happy warmth and retention of youth now were by no means a unique feature of so different? Rob & Bill. Photo by Anita Martinez. days together at this time. However in these, the golden years. the era in which we lived. Many fami- For so many years afterwards I knew that all this would inevitably

Reviews Two E-Books on Love and Sex – One With Lots Of Sex Reviews by Bill McKinnon boys’ code word for homophobia. As you. Joey and Aaron have little in mance and an adventure with plenty No Irish Need Apply by Edward C. for the school graduation prom— common except they are both gay, live of excitement. Patterson (2008 Kindle or Kobo e- well, it’s probably not like the one in northern Florida and like fucking. Kindle and Kobo e-books are book - $0.89 +HST) you attended. One is a gorgeous, accident-prone inexpensive although the portable This novel is dedicated to PFLAG Collision Course by K.A. Mitchell social worker who loves surfing and e-book readers cost about $130 or (Parents and Friends of Gays and (2008 Kindle or Kobo e-book - $4.40 music, exhibits a casual approach to more; however Kindle for PC is free, Lesbians). It’s about two delightful housekeeping, has a cheery, impulsive as are hundreds (perhaps thousands) teenage boys of Irish Catholic back- and gutsy but manipulative personal- of e-books easily downloaded legally. grounds who find themselves, and ity and ten ex-lovers of whom some I read the first of the above books each other, in a study partnership at are still good friends. Can he help on my desk-top PC and the 2nd on school and fall in love. The story is it if he falls in love too easily? The a Kobo also about their two shocked and ini- other guy is a tough, thick-skinned, e-book tially dumbstruck but caring widowed neat-freak paramedic who hates so- reader mothers, and some ugly rumours cial workers, is sombre and hard to from a and sometimes violent homophobia get along with, and wants nothing to Chap- which Kevin and Louis confront do with relationships other than sex; t e r s and come to terms with their in their yet he has raised and still supports s t o r e. last year at high school. The kids are three young and often challenging Y o u occasionally indiscreet in public but heterosexual siblings in college, with m a y don’t expect any sex details. Whatever his dad languishing in prison. Up a l s o happens between them takes place until now his life has been a caffeine- wish to behind a parent-proof (and reader- charged existence of sirens, flashing consid- Buy a house, get a proof) bedroom door. The story is lights, casual sex and fulfilling family er Sony full of humour, charm, warmth and obligations, and oh, yes, he has been e-book fridge magnet (and insights into the complexities of described as an asshole …but maybe readers outstanding service). mother-son relationships, especially he’s not. How could these two so- a v a i l - in a single-parent one-child family; different guys ever get together for able from Sony Stores, Best Buy, et what it’s like if one guy’s mother is + HST) longer than one night in the sack? al. Sony’s are pricier but have some Rosie Porter fairly well-off but the other one’s is Yes, Virginia, gay people do have If nothing else, this is a good how- attractive features. For Kindle, see poor; and some surprising revelations sex. If you want to read a novel about to-have not–for-wimps sex manual, ebookreaderpalace.com/64/how- Realtor about how others at school accept or hot and heavy gay erotica, and/or if but this book is a lot more than that. to-buy-a-kindle-in-canada; for Kobo reject queer school mates. The book’s you are interested in learning about Maybe this book has too much sex see koboereader.com; and for Sony, title reflects discrimination faced by complex, polar opposites who jump in it for some readers but there’s also see sony.ca.. cell 209-7073 the Irish in New Jersey, but is also the into bed together, this book is for a lot of humour and it’s both a ro- www.rosiep.ca 16 — May 2011 — Wayves

: ) )

95 95 Purchase time online now! Purchase PICKUP BEST Purchase Purchase membership by phone 1.900.677.2900 (75 min/$24 1.900.677.2905 (45 min/$14 Purchase memberships anonymously: Seadog’s Spa 2199 Gottingen St. Halifax LINE www.cruiseline.ca www.cruiseline.ca YOUR LOCAL CHAT. TRY IT FREE : code 3505 TRY CHAT. LOCAL 902.431.6725 50% off with our new member special. Call customer support member special. Call customer 1.877.882.2005 more info: for 50% off with our new 18+